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wavernot4love · 1 year

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i've definitely said something like this before but holy crap dude, ls dunes have quite literally changed the trajectory of my life, and every time i see them, it feels like they've done the same for so many people there. i just want to, post-thursday's toronto show, talk a little about how special this band is (this is probably gonna get long).

i've come to care about this band so goddamn much in, well, definitely the 11 months since they first announced themselves, but even moreso the 8 months since past lives dropped & i saw them for the first time @ dunesday toronto '22.

for a little recap of my dunes origin story, as a 22 y/o i grew up in the mid 2010s scene, right? so most of the bands i knew n loved growing up were those & i had never truly done a deep dive into a lot of 2000s/even early 2010s stuff. of course, the biggest, most accessible bands that started during that time were an exception, people like fob, or ptv, or, well, mcr. and a lot of other bands' biggest songs, etc.

so one part of my thought process the day dunes got announced was "woah new frank band? cool, let's see who's in it!" and that's what made me click into the first article i saw.

and the other part: like i kinda alluded to, i'm very active in the scene, i love going to shows & getting involved and i am truly trying to make it my life even moreso (via live music photograohy n design stuff, and hopefully eventually music stuff?). point is, late last july i signed up to volunteer @ a scene fest kinda in my area, my home here in upstate ny, at the time i hadn't been to many shows alone before so i was kinda nervous about heading two hours away by myself, on top of not really knowing what i was gonna be doing volunteerwise, but something pushed me to decide to go through w it. and this thing had the most random (/pos) assortment of the scene. from big metalcore outfits to modern faces of emo/pop punk/post hardcore to localish hardcore, you get the idea. i had a blast & got to watch a ton of sets.

anyways, near the end of the day some dude i'd definitely heard of by name and was aware was some big dude in the scene from some band (my phone was dead so it was killing me i couldn't look that up hhhh), was about to play a solo set so i figured i'd drop by and catch a bit. i was hanging outside of that stage and suddenly bro started playing and i thought "damn, this dude seems cool" then, naturally, weaved my way into the crowd, watched his full hourish long set since he was the last on that stage, and thought, "damn, this dude is cool." besides his music, i remember admiring the way he talked w the crowd, and then after, the way he stood around and chatted extensively with every last person like they were an old friend (i just kinda stood off to the side in my "staff" shirt watching and probably smiling, figuring i'd let dude's genuine fans have their moment... little did i know). anyways, naturally i'm talking about anthony here, and that night when i got home i looked him up and saw he was from circa & saosin and had a Revelation since of course being in the scene i knew about those bands, and i basically vowed to get into bro's music. and, well, safe to say i found a way less than a month later when i opened that article and saw he was singing in a new band with the guitarist of one of the bands that's meant the most to me for the longest (spoiler: i lost my mind when i saw he was the singer in a "YES! this dude" kinda way).

anyways, since then i'd argue my love for mcr somehow grew (i like to think that's because a lot of my love for music relies on connection & community, more on that later), i (specifically surrounding seeing them @ adjacent) have been getting into thursday & coheed, and, of course, last december i got hugely into tsoaf n traveled 2 see them in january, come february i discovered saosin, & thanks to a rec from a kind person outside the dunes show the other night, i'm now becoming irreversibly attached to circa as well. these people's music has changed my goddamn life, and it's all bands i'd never really looked into before despite of course being aware of them. and that is special.

also, at no other show (and shows in general are my favorite place in the world) have i experienced quite the level of community (random but something i've specifically noticed @ dunes & tsoaf & anthony's solo shows is that circa fans are SO nice?) i do at dunes shows. i've been alone every time i've seen them, but never felt less lonely. the show quite literally ended and i immediately had multiple people yelling (/pos) things at me about my midtown shirt, coming up to talk to me in general, and hell, even I had absolutely no problem going up to people with total confidence to chat, something i usually shake in my boots over. we had a freakin campfire style singalong going. i got to talk to people about traveling for shows who do the same with their time, hell, this was the first time i ever got to ramble in person about my love for tsoaf to someone that actually knew what the hell i was talking about. i spoke to people from all over, both physically and from different parts of the scene and yet we had all ended up right here. stuff feels like the embodiment of the dunes whole "lost souls found" thing, dude.

ls dunes gave me the opportunity twice now to chat with somebody (frank) whose music has been with me for the entire going on ten years since i got into the scene. something that wouldn't really (understandably) be possible at an mcr show. and we've reached the point as of thursday's show that i don't feel nervous going up to him anymore either, we entirely just had a pretty long, chill conversation and goofed off a little and i will never take that for granted. i mean that in a "historically interactions with folks in bands i look up to in this scene have meant the world to me because, like i mentioned earlier, my love for music stems from a community "scene" based idea that we're all just people passionate about this stuff" way.

and of course, the shows themselves, but i'm not sure i can accurately describe those, it's something you need to experience for yourself. i have considered toronto1 my favorite show i've been to ever since it happened, and i have been going to shows since 2014. these dudes have chemistry like no other, and you just get the sense watching them that they were born to do this together. and don't get me started on anthony's crowd interaction stuff. he has become one of my favorite frontpeople (if not my genuine favorite) over this past year. no one does it like that dude does.

anyways, i don't know that i've ever felt quite this way about any band before, which seems crazy for me becayse i care deeply about so many bands. ls dunes is special. all i know is i legitimately have not stopped thinking about the dunes since the toronto show thursday, to the point of being kinda perpetually shaky & endlessly needing to remind myself it's okay, they're not going away yet, i still have one more show in pittsburgh this thursday. i truly hope i can talk to the other dudes (especially anthony since i feel like so much of this lore involves him) and tell them some of this then, and maybe meet some of you, too (i'll definitely be getting there early & also sticking around after)!

and no matter what, i can't wait for this show, and all the shows to come, man. so there's the complete wavernot4love recap, well, so far.

#ls dunes #dunesposting #ls dunes you are so goddamn special to me #wavernot4love gets 2 the gig

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stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale · 3 years

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I’m sorry, but can I just go on a little rant about the Louis, clouis, and the Clem comic...?

I didn’t really talk about Louis in my overall review of the comic because I wanted that to be more contained to the content shown on the pages, Clementine’s relationship with AJ, and her as a character.... but the more I think about these comics and Louis, the more frustrated I become thinking about what Clementine abandoning everyone would do to him.

[... okay it’s not little anymore since I guess I can never just do anything simple when it comes to Louis, sorry my bad]

So, no surprise, we all know the comic’s bullshit by now. Clementine leaving everything and everyone behind because she’s not happy is dumb, AJ just letting her go is dumb, and Clem going to the mountains on crutches and a peg leg to find this so-called happiness is dumb.

Now that we’ve established it’s dumb, I wanna talk about Louis because I got a lot of built up feelings about how bullshit this storyline is with how Clementine would not only abandon AJ, but also abandon Louis.

Because let me tell you..... his heart would be broken beyond repair and I need to talk about why.

Sigh.... so.... muh boy.

Before he met Clementine, Louis was this laidback, irresponsible, but caring and musical person who kept his head down to avoid conflict and never looked at the future. He was the kind of person who took things one day at a time, saw survival as a day-to-day task, and said that the future doesn’t exist, there’s only today. You get the point, he was never too concerned with things because they always seemed to work out, and if they didn’t, then that sucks and that’s why we should appreciate every day while we have it.

Louis is shown to be charismatic and friendly, he spends his free time playing piano and card games, but no one really takes him seriously. Not even Marlon, his best friend for 8+ years. While he doesn’t seem to be on bad terms with anyone [including Aasim, they just act like people who disagree with the other’s point of view and have had the same argument many times, but that doesn’t mean they hate each other, y’know?] he also doesn’t appear super close with anyone outside of Marlon and possibly Violet, but even then.

Marlon’s shown to have little faith in him with the way he talks about if Louis will even show up to hunt. He has a controlling grip on Louis that’s prominent during the confrontation scene when he uses intimidation to try to convince Louis to not interfere. Oh, and there’s the fact that Marlon’s been lying to Louis for the past year about the twins and then continued to lie to his face about what really happened to Brody... which isn’t great when you consider how Louis was the only one who had blind faith in him as a leader and, according to Marlon, was the only one who couldn’t see how pathetic he always was.

Violet, while having a few more nicer moments with him than Marlon, still invalidates him and his feelings several times throughout the first half of the game which makes me wonder how close they ever were, or at least if Violet ever considered him a close friend to begin with. And no, a small monologue in the dorms doesn’t make everything better or confirm they were brotp the whole time... especially when once they’re on the boat, Louis might as well not exist because Violet can’t be bothered to acknowledge what happened to him or inquire about how he’s doing. I guess she just didn’t have time react while standing in her cell for several unbothered minutes-- no wait, it’s she already reacted off screen. Right. Good writing is good.

What I’m getting at here is that even though Louis is surrounded by people who he genuinely cares about, there is an argument to be made that he’s a lonely person. Hell, he’s aware of his loneliness when he says that no one hears past his music and jokes. I mean, how many nights do you think he spent by himself playing the piano because no one wanted to hear it? Are they like Violet and crack jokes about how he doesn’t have actual talent? Probably, given that someone literally carved “you suck at playing” onto the side of the damn piano.

Oh, and let’s touch on that backstory of his. Louis grew up wealthy with two parents who loved him and each other, and they gave him anything he wanted except singing lessons. Louis says he wanted to be a real musician. But I guess his father didn’t like that idea and told him no, with the [as Louis puts it] dumb dad lesson of, “You get to be happy, or you get to be rich, can’t be both.” ...which is interesting given that Louis and his family were stupid rich but also.... were they not happy? well, that doesn’t make sense because little Louis knew that if he broke up their marriage, they would be hurt.

So yeah, Louis was so upset that his father continually refused to let him take singing lessons that he broke into the man’s credit cards and faked an affair, which led to his parents divorcing... and then he spit his father’s words back in his face.

Then they dumped him at Ericson. And the walkers came.

There’s so much to unpack from the story he tells that it could be it’s own analysis, but basically.... Louis is aware of why what he did was fucked up, and he carries it with him every day.

He regrets what he did, chews himself out for being such a “vindictive fuckhead” [and the amount of force used in that line tells you a lot, like how it’s not the first time he’s chastised himself like this] and he admits that he doesn’t even know the person he’s talking about. Yet, he still sees himself as bad, saying that they [I assume the staff] told him and the other kids they’re bad people. I don’t doubt that Louis internalized that which played a huge role in the confidence and self-esteem issues he has during tfs.

Anyway, I’ll come back to this later, but when you take that amount of guilt and regret, and mix it with the fact that they dropped him off at this school that was supposed to make him better.... then the walkers came and those teachers, staff, and headmaster? Gone. Left a bunch of kids to fend for themselves, with the exception of Ms. Martin [but given how she looks when we find her I doubt she lasted that long] and I cannot imagine how horrifying that was for all of them. The dead are up eating people, and if you die you become one of them... and the people you thought you could rely on just fucking left you to die at this school.

Every kid in that school has trauma and abandonment issues from before and after the world went to shit, every last one, and Louis isn’t the exception here. Over the years, a lot of kids died and they’ve all seen horrible shit. They all knew they were never going to see their families again, and as far as we know, no one came to get their kids at the beginning. They had to find ways of coping while trying to survive, and all they had left was each other.

Louis copes with music and games and jokes. He’s built up this persona where it seems like he’s unaffected by the comments the others make, that the death and suffering he’s gone through is in the past, that he is confident and open to those around him.

But then Clementine and AJ show up, and Louis grows close with both of them. They had immediate chemistry upon first meeting, he was the one who looked after AJ since it seems like everyone else saw him as a little terror, and he went out of his way to be kind and make them comfortable.

When they go hunting with him, Louis and Clementine have a moment after taking care of the walker where they lower their guards a bit-- Louis gives her more in-depth reasons for his views of survival, and going off her expression, it gets to her and makes her think.... but they’ve know each other a day and he’s not quick to infodump his life story or let her in, so he cuts the conversation short.

Then we have the Marlon confrontation scene that I have gone over so many times in the past. I won’t dillydally with it too long but..... Clementine appeals to Louis, who curls in on himself because of the control Marlon has on him. He wants to help, and hell, he knows this is wrong but he’s so used to not getting involved that he gets defensive.... plus, he’s known Clementine for two days, and he’s known Marlon for 8+ years.... he wants to believe Marlon but you can tell he doesn’t want this, either. It takes Clementine talking to him to give him courage to stand between her and Marlon’s gun and it’s a lot.

AJ shoots Marlon and everything goes to shit, and Louis is a goddamn mess. His best friend was murderer right in front of him, so add that to the trauma list, and he’s overwhelmed with all these feelings that again.... they keep getting invalidated by Violet because “Marlon was a liar and murderer, therefore you shouldn’t feel bad about his death. Get over yourself, Louis, you can be such a shithead sometimes.”

Oh yeah Vi, I guess he should care more about two people he’s known for a total of two days rather than for the safety of the people [including you] he’s grown up with and cared about for 8+ years.... makes sense.

So yeah, little to no support during this time. Alone again.

And just because I have to make this clear so no one gets a hair up their ass-- both Louis and Violet are wrong here. Kicking them out isn’t the solution, but neither is acting like AJ was right to commit murder just because it was Marlon.

But plots gotta plot, so they get voted out and you can see that Louis is conflicted about the whole thing. He wants them gone, but at the same time, he knows what kicking them out means. You can see it on his face that he’s not okay with kicking them out. He’s hurting when he’s there in the dorms telling them how the vote went... he literally doesn’t know what else to do. He just knows that everything hurts, Clem and AJ caused it, and he wants the pain to stop. He even tries to justify it to himself by figuring that they’ve done this before so they’ll be fine. Not a great thing to say, Lou.

Anyway, we know the story, Clem and AJ come back and Louis once again sees the consequences of acting out of pain.... AJ is shot because Louis was hurt and he made a bad decision that he’s gotta live with.... something that he’s done before, and this affirms to him that he’s bad. He wishes he could take it back, and goes as far as to admit that to Clementine during the archery scene.

By the way, credit to him for his apology to her. It’s rare in these games that Clem gets a genuine apology from someone who hurt her and doesn’t turn around to repeat the hurtful behavior, y’know? Plus, I can think of plenty of characters who owed Clem an apology in the past or if they did apologize, it was half-assed.

You can feel how conflicted he is with this whole thing-- learning who Marlon really was and what he did, feeling something for Clementine before everything went down and not knowing how to handle those feelings afterward, caring about AJ and understanding why he thought shooting was the best choice but still hurting that his friend is dead....

And the thing is.... Louis forgives her for so much, as she does him, and through all of that bullshit, they manage to develop that strong connection that turns romantic. Louis lets himself be fully vulnerable with her and is honest about his feelings, how she listened when no one else did and seeing him for more than just the persona he put on.

This works on Clementine’s side, too. Clementine has been through her own fair share of bullshit-- trauma, abandonment, loss, injury, you name it. She’s made mistakes, done terrible things, and has been in enough groups to know that romance usually ends in heartbreak.... and yet, she’s willing to open herself up to Louis and admit she feels a lot for him.

Is it a little rushed? Yep. Could it have been handled better? Of course, most things this season could’ve, but what we got was pretty good.

So Clementine and Louis are romantically involved now, the raiders attack, and she saves him... and boy does Louis feel guilty about that one, too. He feels bad enough that he questions why she would pick him because he can’t fathom his life being worth saving over another’s. He doesn’t see himself as useful, and even though Clementine is literally his girlfriend at this point, his self-esteem is so all over the place that he can’t understand why she would have him at her side.

And when Clementine tells him that he’s too important to her, he’s too baffled to even give a response. He looks at her in disbelief like he wasn’t expecting her to say that. But this shows that at the beginning of their relationship, he still doubts himself, and through her working with him, he begins to build up that strength in himself.

He becomes brave enough to share what got him sent to the school with her, and he plays Don’t Be Afraid for everyone at the party and like.... for once, everyone is listening to him. Really listening to him. They’re not talking shit about his musical skills, they’re not ignoring him or the feelings he’s putting into the song, they’re sitting there with him and I just..... if you watch him, you can see that his eyes get pretty glossy throughout the song. The moment meant something to everyone.

There’s also the fact that Clementine asked him to come with her and AJ onto the boat, and to be the one in charge of the bomb... that’s a huge responsibly and he feels the pressure of that. He starts to panic a bit about if he can do it, because what if he fucks up? What if he gets them caught and makes everything worse? What if something happens to Clementine and he can’t do anything about it?

She’s there to reassure him that she believes in him, and that he can do this. They’re going to get everyone back, and he needs to focus... then he asks her to slap him which why would you? that’s dumb, so Clementine smooches him instead and like.... he physically relaxes into her because he’s comfortable and trusts her in this situation.

Also, he loves her and cares about this mission enough to cover himself and his fancy jacket in walker guts.... sure, he complains while doing so but how else is he gonna cope with rubbing rotten guts on himself to blend in with a herd of walkers?

Skipping ahead so that we’re not here all day, I wanna talk about the walk back to the school because it’s one of the most important clouis moments in the game and a huge reason that solidifies why the comic is bullshit.

Louis went off on his own to go out and find them. He didn’t know where they would be, he just knew that he had to go out and find them after making sure everyone was okay back at the school because he couldn’t bare the thought that he had lost them. And the way the AJ gets so excited to see him? and the group hug??

At this point, Louis has grown so much as a character. With Clementine by his side to support him, he’s grown stronger and more reliable. Remember how he never thought about the future? Well, now he is because his relationship with Clementine has given him a reason to long for a future. He talks about building this imaginary house with her, one he knows they can’t physically build... but it’s his way of saying we can build a home together, that he wants a future with her and AJ and everyone else. It’s such a personal conversation that flows so easy between them. Louis is more comfortable talking to her about things from his past, which is something he didn’t want to do back in ep1.

He confides in her how he’s feeling after he shot and killed Dorian, he tells her that having a home means protecting it and I just.... it’s so good, okay? And from Clementine’s side, you can feel how at ease she is with him, too. Just the way she smiles at him as they’re walking? like he’s the cutest thing and she’s so happy to have him with her?

But then we gotta deal with Minerva’s crazy ass on the bridge and well, AJ shoots Tenn and Louis is having flashbacks to Marlon and it’s not great. That’s a whole thing, and he ends up separated from them while escaping.

We don’t get to see Louis’ reaction to Clementine getting bit and losing her leg since I guess that puts a damper on the overly happy ending. But, going off of what we know about him and what I’ve explained [which isn’t even all of it, this isn’t a full Louis character analysis. if it was, it would be much longer and in multiple parts... believe it or not, I’m trying to not make this too long and only sorta failing...] we can get an idea of how he would react.

Um, to say he was upset is an understatement.

Because remember, he had no time to think and climbed over the fence, thinking he could get them to climb over and they could get away, but it didn’t work. He ended up leaving them in order to save himself since walkers were closing in on him.

But you know that he’d blame himself for the bite. A lot of, “if I had just stayed” and “I should’ve climbed back over, I should’ve stayed with you.” I’m sure there were points where it looked like Clem wouldn’t make it and I can’t imagine how much hurt he went through watching her suffer and heal from losing a leg like that.

Not only that, but knowing that AJ was the one to do it? And him thinking about what Clem’s death would do to AJ after all this? There isn’t a doubt in my mind that Louis would take care of AJ if she died. He cares about AJ, and he loves Clementine, so he be there for both of them, even if he’s still hurting from Tenn’s death.

However, Clementine didn’t die. She survived the bite and amputation, and when we flashforward, she and Louis are still happily together. Louis is right there next to her at dinner, and he’s the one to help her with her crutches. He’s there to go over future plans to meet the traveling caravan, and Clementine wants him to be the one to go.

Oh, and Louis once again forgives AJ for shooting Tenn, claiming that he understands that AJ saw something that he couldn’t. Like with Marlon, he’s not happy Tenn’s dead but he can see why AJ did it to save his life.

I just..... happy ending. Clementine and Louis are together and she’s truly happy to have found a home for her and AJ with him at Ericson.

....But then the comic thought it would be fun to say “nah.”

The comic isn’t canon, I’m still insulted that it would ever consider itself as such, but even so I can’t help but feel so frustrated about how this would destroy Louis.

He finally found someone he would consider his best friend, not just his girlfriend. She saw past that funny man persona and he trusted her enough to let her past this wall he built around himself. He let himself become vulnerable around her, he named his song after her. Their initials are carved into his piano with a heart surrounding them. He loved her.

Clementine left him feeling loved, something he probably hasn’t truly felt since he was a little boy with his parents before their divorce. She loved him even after hearing his past because she knew that wasn’t him anymore, and she helped him build the confidence he needed to step up. Because of Clementine, Louis wants to enjoy every day while also looking at the future. He isn’t lonely anymore, he has her and AJ. He’s truly happy.

So to tell me that Louis would wake up one morning only to have AJ tell him that Clementine’s gone, she’ been planning an escape without telling anyone because she wasn’t happy...? I’m sorry, but if you think that wouldn’t leave Louis absolutely devastated, then you know nothing about him as a character.

This idea is just.... look, Louis is perceptive. That’s a big part of his character, he’s perceptive of those around him. If Clementine was showing signs of being unhappy or depression, he would see it. He would notice a change. He would be able to tell if something was off, and he would ask her about it. Louis is the type of person to ask you what you need. What can he do to help? What do you need to feel better? And if you don’t know, it’s okay, he’ll help you figure it out in any way possible.

Plus, the comic suggests that there are times where she went off on her own but came back [probably doing her escape prep ugh] and you expect me to believe that Louis wouldn’t notice that or wonder what she’s doing? Wouldn’t sense that something’s going on?

After she’s gone, he’s going to blame himself for not being enough. He couldn’t make her happy and he was a fool to think he ever could. AJ lost the only family he’s known since he was born because Louis couldn’t help her, couldn’t do anything to stop her from leaving.

And for him to realize that she didn’t love him? Clementine, the girl he thought the world of because of how strong and confident and in-charge she was, because she saw him for who he was..... she left him, abandoned him... and she couldn’t even be bothered with a goodbye.... that says that she didn’t care all that much about him in the end.

You KNOW that he would think he had this coming, too. How could the universe allow him to fall in love and be happy with someone who loved him back after what he did to his parents? He would feel so heartbroken that he would see this as some sort of karma for breaking up his parents happy marriage as a kid years before he ever met Clementine and before the apocalypse.

I fucking can’t.... I don’t have the words to fully explain how much I hate this. Louis wouldn’t be okay afterward, and I doubt he’d ever fully recover. I wasn’t joking when I mentioned before that Louis would stop playing piano. How could he sit there and play when I he can see is their initials and remember the night she confessed to him? When he named his song after her? Clementine left and took the music with her because Louis wouldn’t have it in him... something that he used to cope would be ruined and that’s just.... it’s fucking awful.

Not only that, but now he has AJ who I assume is hurting just as much [though the comics inaccurately assume he would just let Clem go sooo... yeah] and he would be the only one Louis would really talk to about it, but then again.... what if AJ doesn’t wanna talk about it? What if AJ starts to act out and things just become terrible and Louis is just too overwhelmed?

I just.... UGH. That’s how I feel. UGH.

Clementine from the comic? Not her. She would never fucking do this to Louis, AJ, or anyone else at Ericson, and you would know that if you played the tfs.

Sigh.... sorry, I just needed to get this all out. I haven’t seen anyone talk about how Clem leaving would affect Louis and I’ve gotten some asks/come across some posts about Louis that have left me incredibly annoyed.... well, I was annoyed before because of the comics, so my annoyances with those things were only heightened. So yeah... I wanted to talk about Louis’ character in hopes of explaining why he would be so hurt if this comic was canon.

Which it’s not. So it’s fine.

How are we all feelin’ at this point, by the way? I know I’m not the only one still annoyed with the comic, so I hope y’all are doin’ okay. Hope you’re stayin’ chill and thinking about your faves to help cope with this mess hahaha

#twdg louis #twdg clementine #twdg clouis #twdg aj #twdg marlon #twdg violet #clouis #twdg #sometimes i just need to talk about louis okay #one day i'll do a full character analysis that goes over everything #but today isn't that day #long post

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365days365movies · 4 years

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January 19, 2021: Léon: The Professional (Epilogue)

Hey, look! An elephant in the room! We should address that, huh?

So, recently, actress and Léon star herself Natalie Portman was interviewed about acting in this movie, and she said that the movie itself was fine to act in. It was the response to that work from...y’know what, perverts - let’s not dance around that - that she wasn’t the biggest fan of. It changed the roles she was willing to accept, and her acting style in general. Which makes absolute sense for her to do.

But now, you may understand why this film is...awkward. Because let me clarify something: this is a good movie! But, especially with relatively recent revelations from Hollywood in the last few years, you know that some people enjoyed this movie in a WHOLLY UNACCEPTABLE fashion. Which is...well, again:

Because of that, this film was gotten a lot of negative attention, then and now. And, let’s also be fair here: I’m not a fan of the fact that Luc Besson put Natalie Portman in this...uncomfortable position in the first place. It’s a little squicky to be putting a 12 year-old in that context, is what I’m saying. Roger Ebert agrees, in the closing statement of his review on the movie:

But always at the back of my mind was the troubled thought that there was something wrong about placing a 12-year-old character in the middle of this action. In a more serious movie, or even in a human comedy like Cassavetes' "Gloria," the child might not have been out of place. But in what is essentially an exercise - a slick urban thriller - it seems to exploit the youth of the girl without really dealing with it.

.Yeah, I agree with that. But OK, if we take that uncomfortable aspect away from the movie (and it is possible to do so), then what did I think? Well, let’s get into that, shall we?

Recap

Cast and Acting

Strap in, this one’s gonna be long. Three parts, and a coda at the end.

OK, first I gotta talk about Léon, or rather Jean Reno as Léon. Here's the thing about these heroic bloodshed protagonists; they’re always these cold, reserved badasses with armored hearts that have been closed off by a personal tragedy, from when they were more innocent. But with Léon, we never see that tragedy; we have no idea what makes this man who or what he is. And yet, he still has dimension as a character, hidden depths within an unknown past, and also a surprising innocence injected into him. He genuinely enjoys going to see old movies, he’s teaching himself how to read, we only really see him drink milk, he cares deeply for his plant. And, before Mathilda, he’s lonely, and you actually feel for him? THis is, by the way, despite the fact that the first sequence of the film is him MURDERING A BUNCH OF PEOPLE. And despite that, I really did feel for him in the end there. And while the directing and writing take a part of this, GODDAMN does Reno do an amazing job! He perfectly portrays the nuances of this character, but puts on an incredibly badass demeanor when he needs to. Reno deserves more credit as an actor in the USA, because he’s astonishingly great in his movie, seriously.

And then...then there’s Natalie Portman. See, back in the wild, wild west of the ‘90s, child actors were ALL OVER THE GODDAMN PLACE. And the vast majority of them weren’t very good, let’s be honest. But in her turn as Mathilda, awkward preteen crush and all, Portman KNOCKS it out of the goddamn park with this portrayal. And by the way...THIS IS HER FIRST ACTING ROLE. Yeah. Holy shit. She’s brilliant, and I’m a little mad that she didn’t get an award nod AT ALL for this role. She’s fantastic, seriously, it’s insane. And yeah, her character and the dynamic with Léon definitely makes me uncomfortable...but maybe it’s because Mathilda is surprisingly believable, acting with a surprise innocence of her own. Seriously...amazing job to Nathalie Portman.

If Reno was understatedly nuanced and complex, and Portman was talented and emotional, Gary Oldman was BATSHIT INSANE. And holy shit, is he a wonderfully engaging and terrifying villain. This is Oldman dialed up to...eh, 8? You get him dialed up to 10, and I’m pretty sure you get Dracula. But he’s a HELL of a lot of fun here, honestly, if also extremely creepy and frightening. He steals every scene that he’s in, with his speeches, mannerisms, and affectations. He upstages, well...EEEEVERRRYYYYYOOOOOOONNNNNE!!!

And is everybody else in here good? Yeah, they are, but they’re completely drowned out by these three. The acting in this film is wonderful all around. 10/10. I mean that, 10/10.

Plot and Writing

If I had a single word about the writing, it’d be...French. There are some lines, ESPECIALLY Mathilda’s lines about love, that definitely sound more French than American. After all, this is a French film, and the writer is Luc Besson himself! And other than that...the writing’s fine. Plot’s fine, too, straightforward and all that. I really don’t have much to say about the plot, if I’m honest. And if I had one negative thing to say...yeah, the childhood crush thing is still super uncomfortable, honestly. Still, put in context, it’s a little bit better. And I should mention that, while it’s SUPER CONTROVERSIAL here in the good old US of A, this wasn’t nearly as big of a deal in France. And I should also mention...it’s mildly autobiographical. Yeaaaaaaaah, that blonde girl in the very beginning of the movie is actually Besson’s WIFE. You know...the 17-year-old, who’d known Besson since she was 12 and he was 29, and they started dating when she was 15, and the had a child a year later, before this movie was made. Y-yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

7/10 here, nothing bad, nothing great. Basically average heroic bloodshed plotline, with some...other elements.

Directing and Action

Fun fact: Luc Besson’s reception in his home country is mixed, especially early in his career. This is because his directing style is focused far more on spectacle and bombast than it is on emotion. Definitely more American in style than French. And this movie definitely has some of that, although it’s definitely not as crazy as some of the other movies on this list. But some of the shots here are weird, some of them here are crazy cool, and most of them are just great. But this movie still focuses more on emotion and character buildup and revelations, than it does on action. Which is great, but this is Action January, so how was the action? This takes off of the gun-fu genre, with essentially all of it focused around gunplay. And the interesting thing is, while these aren’t the most bombastic action scenes, its the emotion around them that keep you on the edge of your seat and invested. So, weirdly, this might be the movie that’s integrated the action scenes with the movie’s overall emotional tone the most seamlessly. Well...of the English language movies, anyway. Overall, 8/10 here!

Production and Art Design

START SPREADING THE NEEEEEEEEEEWS, because it’s New York, New York! Most of this film was filmed on location, and it shows! As someone who grew up going to NYC on a regular basis, it definitely feels authentic to ‘90s New York. Which, of course, it is. Costume design, for Mathilda especially, is good, although one or two of her outfits feels a little over-complicated at times. Still, no complaints, really. I love Léon’s tiny glasses, and Stansfield’s suit (plain as it may be). Really, this movie is simply an authentic feeling New York, and there isn’t too much else to say about that. 8/10 again.

youtube

Music and Editing

Music’s definitely good, including this song by Sting that we hear at the end. Editing is mostly OK, although there are some weird cuts here and there. And...I’m not sure I have much to say about this category. Oof. Sorry, honestly, this is probably a sign of good editing, since it wasn’t obvious. And as for the music, I remember it...but it was mostly overshadowed by the events of the film itself. So...7/10?

80%! And I’m satisfied with that, honestly!

This movie is built to make you a little uncomfortable while watching it. But, I still believe that it’s a movie to be watched. Good action, prominent emotional development, great acting. This one’s good, and give it a watch!

Luc Besson, Luc Besson. You gave me a French English-language heroic bloodshed action movie about an older man saving a girl a generation or so younger than him, that also produced a well-known meme on the internet. More, please!

January 20, 2021: Taken (2008)

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smokeybrand · 3 years

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Endless Love

With another season of Love, Death + Robots in the books, i wanted to revisit the entire series one more time. I spent the last two days, running through the entirety of the franchise, all eighteen from the first season and all eight from the second, twice, because i absolutely love this series. From the bottom to the top, these are my absolute favorite entries into the franchise so far.

10. Ice

Ice was a real surprise for me. It’s the only entry in season two that is classically animated so it already got bonus points from me but, as an entire short, it was amazing! The second we got outside of that apartment and into the wider world, i wanted to live there. So much content could be embellished from that all-too-short time spent in that world. More than that, i loved he relation ship between Sedgewick and Fletcher. I’m not saying an entire show abut those two is necessary but i wouldn’t scoff at them being supporting characters in a more anthology or ensemble show about that world.

9. All Through the House

This one is just cute. It’s a genuine short and i i don’t think there is a ton of legs in exploring that world but i had a fantastic time with what we got. The animation was gorgeous and the premise was outstanding. Of course, I'm curious about the “Naughty” but we don’t necessarily need confirmation about that I think that little glimpse into the world was more than enough.

8. Three Robots

Three Robots is in the same boat as All Through the House. i loved the time spent in this world but i don’t think we need to to revisit it in any capacity. What we got was the perfect amount of time there. It was beautifully animated, ingenuously written, and executed perfectly. This was a surprise for me to be honest because, in my order, it came right after Sonnie’s Edge and The Witness so shifting thematic gears like that was a little jarring. Jarring and welcome.

7. Helping Hand

Helping Hand is everything i wanted Gravity to be. This one won me over with the sheer panic of it’s narrative. The storytelling was incredibly intimate but that tension was f*cking palpable! It was able to really instill the utter despair and unbridled dead Alexadria felt as she began to spiral off into the infinite nothingness. I was absolutely enthralled with the humanity and sacrifice she made in an effort to straight up survive. Like, how many of us could do what Alex did in that situation? How many of us would have the absolute balls to make that call? Absolutely brilliant storytelling.

6. Pop Squad

Pop Squad makes this list on the sheer potential of that world. Aside from the fact that the entire narrative revolves around straight up murdering children, something that rarely ever flies in the greater entertainment world, and i f*cking love it! Outside of the fact that this entry is easily one of the most beautiful submitted for season two, i absolutely fell in love with the scope of that world. There is a ton of stories that can be told there, so many characters we can follow. Hell, i wouldn’t mind a limited series just following Briggs up to his fateful demise. I’d watch the hell out of that!

5. The Witness

The Witness makes this list based strictly on the strength of it’s aesthetic. For me, the art design in this short was the strongest of the first season and i say that knowing it’s only the fifth entry on this list. As a narrative, it’s a closed looped so there is a ton of lacking substance but the way it’s executed is too f*cking dazzling to ignore. This thing smacks of that Spiderverse animation style but does it in a way that sends you into a surreal trip of colors, glitches, and nudity. I as completely in awe of what i witnessed in that entry.

4. Snow in the Desert

Snow’s adventure was my absolute number one of season two. It’s f*cking incredible. The animation, the character work, the plots, the world building; All of it is an absolute marvel of execution. It presented a complete universe in a matter of minutes and i found myself not wanting to leave. Indeed, of the eight new entries, Snow’s wold is one that i absolute need more of. I need to see his life before Hirald, before his balls got a bounty. I want to explore his very human life with his wife and why she did what she did. I want to see what that world looked like two hundred years before we got our fleeting glimpse, and what Earth looks like in present day. Snow in the Desert was so goddamn great, i was upset it was so short. That’s only happened to me with one other entry on this list and at the very top.

3. Beyond the Aquila Rift

Now, i just gushed, full tilt, about how much i loved Snow in the Desert so why is Aquila ahead of it on this list? Why are there three more ahead of it on this list? Because the remaining three left me with a complete feeling in their narrative while leaving the door open for deeper exploration in to their worlds. Plus, i mean, Aquila’s presentation was f*cking chef’s kiss. Watching that short felt like watching The Fifth Element. Between the space setting and the killer music, it definitely gave me Luc Besson vibes and we all know how much i enjoy Besson’s movie movie making. Aquila is rife for anthology storytelling, just the world Greta could fabricate in her mercy killing duties as a giant spider nest is prime for infinite narratives. Think Tales from the Crypt but sexy and full of Alien Spider Mistress.

2. Sonnie’s Edge

Sonnies Edge was my first glimpse of what would become the utter brilliance of Love, Death + Robots. I Was absolutely enthralled by the character designs and the overall world because, if you don’t know this about my, cyberpunk dystopias are kind of my thing and the world of Sonnie’s Edge it my neon drenched wet dreams perfectly. Watching this felt like watching those old, excessively violent, gratuitously sexy, Eighties anime entries i grew up on. I missed all of the blood and f*cking and gore and violence. Sonnie brought that all back for me, leaving me satisfied but with a nagging hunger for more.

1. Good Hunting

Of all the shorts submitted between these two season, Good Hunting is my absolute favorite. I absolute love every second of this entry. The animation is fluid and top tier, giving justice t the gorgeous art direction and character design. The mix of computer and classic animation mixed perfectly, never outshining one over the other. I’m not he biggest fan of Steampunk but this is the rare entry that really grabbed my attention with how intricate, how absolutely stunning, all of the the iron work is in that world. As i gush about every aspect chosen to present this magnificent world to us, the crux of my adoration lies with the relationship between Liang and Yan. That sh*t was a real pleasure to see and, even after the tragedy, their love for each other really resonated through to the end. I want more of this world than any other we’ve seen so far and i hate that all we got was this one short.

Look, this is just the top ten of my list and, in all honesty, this thing stays in flux. With the exception of the front three, any of these shorts can make my list on any day of the week. I really like Automates Customer Service, Zima Blue, The Tall Grass, Suits, and Shape-Shifters. I’m sucker for classic animation so Blindspot has a shot, even if it’s the weakest of the first season, and The Secret War is just a feast for the eyes. The is a lot of good to great in this show and i can’t wait for the third season. Love, Death + Robots is a bastion for pure creativity, something that mainstream Hollywood lacks. That, i think, is why i adore this series so much. I miss when cats took risks and created unique masterpieces. You see that with smaller studios like Neon and A24 but that spirit has long since vacated the major studios. Thank the stars for Netflix because without them, we’d never have wonderful little nuggets of pure inspiration like this show.

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docholligay · 4 years

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Follow Water Down

I have been wandering around in the woods since I was a small child. My family was not particularly well off, and from the ages of probably 3 to 16, the only vacations we ever took were camping trips. We left the house for the woods nearly every weekend. I live in Montana, and so when I say camping trips, I don’t mean we headed off to the KOA with a pool, I mean if I walked away from the campsite I was in the goddamn National Forest. I was genuinely happy with this arrangement, as I was a strange child who grew up to be a strange adult, and I enjoyed the quiet, the sense of exploration, the smell of the trees.

I began leaving the campsite nearly from the word go, and by the time I was about 8 or so, I was very much off by myself in the woods for the majority of the day, which leads us to our post today. There are people who would call my mom grossly neglectful for having allowed me to do so much on my own at such a young age, and even she gets bashful when she talks about it, but I credit it with a lot of positives:

I have an extremely good sense of direction

I have a strong core of self-sufficiency and am not easily overwhelmed by anxiety

I can be alone in the quiet with my thoughts

I am rough and tumble as HELL, owing to many many many falls down the sides of mountains, huge gashes in my legs, being stalked by a mountain lion, and one very memorable miscalculation that ended in me falling off a (small) waterfall

When I meet my fear, I can master it*

So what I am here to present to you today are very basic survival skills such as I would teach my own child, such as I was taught as a child. This is by no means comprehensive, and if you intend to get seriously into outdoor life, I recommend both doing far more research, and taking a a Wilderness First Aid class, which are frequently offered when it’s NOT Covid, and which I take about once every 3-5 years (I am due). This is a primer for those who are young, or new, or mostly want to experience the wilderness by reading about me doing it.

Follow Water Down.

I cannot remember how old I was when I learned this. It’s the sort of thing that is a part of my makeup, my mother must have told me when I was only a toddler and its stuck with me so hard that it’s one of the first things I tell people.

If you are lost:

Water will always lead you back to civilization eventually. Join up with the stream. See which way its going. Go that way. This is obviously not significantly helpful if you are lost in a flat desert plain but then again, I did start this by saying I was a child of the woods and not the desert. This seems like such an easy trick that people often ignore me when I say it, but it is the simplest thing for a child to remember.

I can’t remember how old I was when I got lost in a tangle of hills and mountains in the Little Belts, where the trail faded but I kept going in my normal bullheaded way. But I was well and truly lost by the time it was about 3 pm, and in some ways I wish I had worn a step tracker back in those days because I am extremely certain I went miles and miles, as one does when they leave immediately after breakfast and don’t come back till dinner. I had no idea where I was, where the campsite was, or what direction I should be going.

I was not thrilled.

But I was not a kid who sat down and cried, in that I had smaller concerns before, and so could easily grow to meet the larger ones. I simply walked down the mountain, knowing a valley was more likely to have a stream I could easily join. Lo and behold, there in that little valley was a snowmelt creek, and I followed it downstream, knowing eventually there would be a house, or a campground, or something. In a twist of glorious good luck, it actually led me back toward where the campsite was, and as I began to recognize things, I easily clipped into our campsite long before any sign of trouble.

Follow Water Down. If you aren’t near a stream, head for the nearest valley, and follow the valley. This will generally lead you to water. People will tell you to stay put and that is WAY smarter than wandering aimlessly in circles, which is why I say to follow something. You think you won’t go in circles, but you will. By following a streambed, not only are you doubtlessly heading back to civilization on a long enough timeline, but you keep yourself from doing that.

Your Pack:

Before you go out for the day, you should have a simple day pack. Mine is an Osprey Hikelite 18, but I hike all the time, and you don’t need something that technical. A plain ol Jansport will work as long as it fits you well. I do however, really approve of and recommend a waist clip. I also think a pocket for a water bottle on the outside is really useful, but you’re not going to fucking die if you have to take off your pack to get to your water bottle. I just find it takes up space I don’t want.

Gear:

More important than your pack itself is what you have in it. Again, this is according to people named Doc, who are me. This is stuff I always take with me when I am by myself, on a trail where it would be realistic to assume I would not see someone else for hours. This is like 95% of Montana trails, or any time that I am off trail.

Compass. You can get fancy, pretty compasses, but a lot of times they lack the actual essentials you need. I like this guy, which is well made, can be clipped to you backpack easily, and is inexpensive. I don’t have the time or space to really try to teach you how to use a compass, but here’s a really good simple primer from the American Hiking Society.

Paper Map. I sometimes break this one, admittedly, but I shouldn’t. Having a paper map of the area is always a really smart practice, and used in combination with the compass, can help you get unlost quickly, or at the very least give you an idea of how close to any given outpost you are.

Water Bottle. Please don’t tell me you were going to attempt to leave without this. I have no preferences on one, shockingly, and I’m being serious. I’ve been given to use an old disposable one, who gives a shit.

Water Filter. Now THIS I did not have as a child, because my parents didn’t know any better, but if I follow in the grand tradition of my people and release my child into the mountains, I will give them one for certain. I knew what kind of water to look for if one was going to drink from a stream, and I did so, which probably explains why I am not susceptible to ~tummy upsets~ to this day. However, it would have been smarter for me to have one of these. I like LifeStraw but Sawyer makes a perfectly good one. Look for lightweight, it’s a day pack, kids.

Knife. I have many many feelings about knives, which would require its own post, but this is fairly essential for being out and about. This is not a thing I would necessarily cheap out on, though there are fine options at most price points. This is my knife:

The Gerber Propel AO. The serrated and straight blade edge means there’s a lot of options for use as a tool, I find the blade to be strong and hold an edge well. Most American-made Gerbers (be sure and check, as they have a much shittier Chinese-made division) are incredibly well made knives. Leatherman multi-tools and Swiss Army Knives are, if you ask people named Doc who are me, a waste of weight and size, but if I were to buy a Leatherman, it would be a Free K2X. I would not buy a Swiss Army Knife.

A jacket/fleece/pullover. Listen, i am the last one who wants to carry this shit but if you get lost overnight (as has never happened to me, kinehara.) you are going to want it. Read up on what the lowest temperatures are, and rate it to that. Depending on what mountain you are in, this is going to vary widely. And for the love of god, wear pants. I know, I know, it’s in the 70s and you’re hoooooooot but seriously, you’ll be less likely to injure yourself and you won’t fucking freeze.

Flashlight/headlamp.

There are fancy firestarters, but honestly I just throw in a bic.

Food! Clif bars are great for this, lightweight, high calorie, keep well. this is in addition to your sandwich or whatever you’re packing for planned eating.

Sunscreen/bug spray. Don’t be stupid.

Whistle. Three sharp shot blasts is the easy and international sign for help.

FIRST AID KIT this has its own thing. A first aid kit can be very basic to very intense. Our group first aid kit is more intense, but when I’m stuffing a day pack, I want stuff that’s light.

Ibuprofen

Bandages

Gauze

Leukotape

wound wipes/antibac

Imodium, benedryl, caffeine

Oxycontin. This is leftover from long ago and basically exists in case I break my leg and have to drag myself out of there, or, as we like to say, a Worst Case Scenario.

That’s it! It essentially fits in a bento box.

You will want to be wearing a sunhat of some sort, sunglasses at hand, and a watch. Not a smart watch, a watch watch. It’s good to know what time it is, better to know that after your phone dies. Attach bear bells to your pack, or your shoe, or something. You do not want to surprise a bear, that is how people die.

You may notice that I do not have a phone, external battery, GPS tracker or anything like that listed. GPS trackers are not a bad idea if you want to invest the money in backcountry--my wife has one--but I never have and I do not consider them essential. Phones and external batteries are not useful to me, and in the places I go there’s often not service. If there IS service, I find I’m more irritated than not by the people with me, who often can’t pull their faces out of telling their audience how much of a life they have to actually have one. Be alone with your fucking thoughts for once.

Which leads me to my next thing: DO NOT WEAR HEADPHONES TO HIKE OH MY GOD. Being able to hear what’s going on around you is key to safety, and also to allowing you to get your bearings. If you are listening to music or something, you are far more likely to sneak up on something, or allow it to sneak up on you. Don’t do it. It’s a terrible idea.

Should I bring bear spray? This is an excellent question! We have ample bear spray, and I often wear it but I just as often wear Montana Bear Spray (a gun). It’s easier to practice with a gun, I feel more sure of how to use it, and I’m comfortable around it. That being said, this is not the story for most of America, and I understand that. So make sure you are VERY familiar with how to use your bear spray.

I suppose this went off the rails into supplies more than “tips for survival” but honestly I would rather help you all AVOID trouble than help you out of it. It’s easier to pack clif bars than set a rabbit snare, and its easier to not get lost than it is to build shelter. Also, this is already at 2,000 words, so if you have a SPECIFIC question, let me know!

*Apologies to Phillip Pullman, but if I were going to get anything from HDM tattooed on me, this sentiment would be it, the only problem being the actual line is “You ent afraid are you?” “Not yet. When I am, I shall master the fear.” which doesn’t look as good but damn has that resonated with me since I read it.

#That was Oddly Specific #Holligay is 34: The celebration

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containsxmultitudes · 4 years

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Snick for the ship thing

Send me a ship and i’ll tell you

Who hogs the duvet: Hundo percent that’s Nick. His temperature drops when he sleeps. He’s a blanket stealer. He will toss and turn in his sleep and absolutely steal it and burrito himself in it. Sam probably needs to keep a spare blanket nearby just in case.

Who texts/rings to check how their day is going: Nick. I mean technically both do. They both have experiences with losing people they love. But Nick especially does it because sometimes his way of doing it is to send text memes and things.

Who’s the most creative when it comes to gifts: Probably Nick?

Who gets up first in the morning: Sam. Sam feels like the early riser type. Nick doesn’t sleep well most of the time, anyway. Usually finds other means to rest. Takes short naps to try and make up for the fact that the minimal 8 hours at least is hard to achieve. So if he actually manages to sleep he is Grumpy As Fuck if he’s awake before 11am.

Who suggests new things in bed: You know, I’m not sure. I think it might be Sam in like a more official sense of genuine suggestions. Nick in the form of making really bad jokes about kinks. He’s usually joking, but he’s also deeply open minded to trying things when jokes become more than jokes. And also when Sam actually DOES want to try things.

Who cries at movies: Nick. He’s a goddamn Sap. He has cried over Titanic, and he will cry again.

Who gives unprompted massages: Nick. He’s got restless hands. It’s not even always like, “oh you’re so tense” type massages. it’s just like his arm is over the back of the couch and now he’s kinda giving head scritches, or gentle little shoulder rubs, maybe like super gentle back of the neck type massages.

Who fusses over the other when they’re sick: You know what, I think Sam, probably. But it’s not because Nick doesn’t fuss a little bit. It’s because for some reason I see Sam as the type to pretend he’s feeling better than he is. And Nick has gradually learned that fussing isn’t helpful to getting Sam to chill the hell out. He softly makes his helpfulness seem like it’s less of “You’re sick and I’m caring for you.” and more “no don’t even worry about it, I like doing this.” and allowing Sam to do little things so he feels like he’s being productive but without wearing him out.

Who gets jealous easiest: Sam. In relationships, Nick is weird. In that he doesn’t really experience relationship jealousy. He experiences the thing where it just makes him happy to see his partners happy. Which is to say if Sam wanted to flirt with someone else, and he just said so to Nick. Nick would encourage it. Like Nick’s never been in an officially polyamorous or non-monogamous relationship. But he’d be really good in one. His only beef is when real cheating happens. Like he’s so damn open that if you choose to still lie, then he’ll get jealous and upset. But like if you’re talking to him about it, you still definitely also wanna be with him and it’s not a break up situation (which he still prefers communication in, obviously), then he’s more than happy for people to get a chance to explore things they otherwise wouldn’t.

Who has the most embarrassing taste in music: Probably Nick. He’s very eclectic. He’ll listen to anything.

Who collects something unusual: Nick. He collects items that people have to ask about so he can spout a horrendous pun. It’s a slowly growing collection. And it’s not super obvious, but it exists.

Who takes the longest to get ready: Nick. He’s very self conscious and can spend quite a bit of time if he’s feeling really bad about himself. I imagine Sam has learned how to be quick with getting ready from how he grew up.

Who is the most tidy and organized: Nick. He needs things organized and tidy cause it’s habitual from keeping things pretty clean and organized in his tattoo shop.

Who gets most excited about the holidays: Depends on the holiday. Depends on the year.

Who is the big spoon/little spoon: It switches.

Who gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports: Nick. It’s playful competition, though.

Who starts the most arguments: I’m actually not sure the answer to this one. Nick likes play fighting. So like silly arguments about silly things that are really just not something to really be angry about. But I also think Nick might be more upset about the hunting thing than he often lets on. He won’t ever stop him. But sometimes he really hates it and really will say so.

Who suggests that they buy a pet: Could be either. Depends on the situation. I feel like during frames of time where it’s been a long time since Sam’s gone somewhere, it might actually be Sam considering a dog. Otherwise Nick kind of has like weird animal friends already so he might not always mention it. Like he feeds some of the outdoor cats, and a bunch of wild pigeons and magpies that stop by his house. But he might at some point be like, “we should get a cat/dog.” casually.

What couple traditions they have: I’m not sure. But consider: they do facemasks together cause Nick’s a dork and would make sam do one with him at least once a week, “it makes your face so soft.”

What tv shows they watch together: I’m not sure, but Nick would definitely put on Star Trek. He’s a nerd. But he also likes weird drama shows so also those. And for Sam probably various documentaries.

What other couple they hang out with: I’m not sure.

How they spend time together as a couple: They do many things together as a couple. I imagine a lot of it is just casual things that could be done as friends. Things they were doing before they got together. But with extra snuggles and kisses in between.

Who made the first move: Almost certainly Nick.

Who brings flowers home: Both, but Nick does it quite a bit. He likes having flowers around him.

Who is the best cook: That depends how well your Sam cooks. Because Nick is,,,, average at cooking. He CAN cook to save his life, but he’s really bad at figuring out how to season things properly. It takes him more than two tries at something to get it down right. But he’s really good at breakfast foods.

#hesnotyourpet #sam and nick tag ; hesnotyourpet

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wickwackity · 4 years

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dew them a l l then pussy 👀👀👀 u wont

yes i WILL

cracking knuckles as we speak to type this all out

ALRIGHT i’m not retyping 1, 20, and 29 i’m too lazy to copy paste

2) have you ever found a writer who thinks just like you? if so, who?

yes yes i have and while i will not be tagging them, xtarmanderx on ao3/tumblr. they write brett so well it knocks me off my feet every time

3) list your fandoms and one character from each that you identify with

goddamn this is going to be so long ok

teen wolf: nolan, percy jackson: nico, the society: grizz, all for the game: neil, my hero academia: shouji

4) do you like your name? is there another name you think would be a better fit?

i do like my name, it took me a while to pick it out. i’ve stuck with grant for like 2ish years now? but sometimes i wonder if it doesn’t fit me all that well. been thinking about changing it to something like mason or mark cause that’s semi close to my deadname

5) this is a long question i’m not typing it out

ngl i stares at it for a solid 2 minutes trying to figure out what it meant,,, and i think i lean more towards human being instead of doing. while i think actions can speak louder than words, sometimes it’s impossible to do actions (if that makes sense)

6) are you religious/spiritual?

nah, i’m atheist. my dads a hardcore catholic but i’ve never felt a connection with god or a higher being. although one time i went to church with a few of my friends when i lived in louisiana and as soon as i walked in, they looked at me and said “i’m surprised you didn’t burst into flames in the doorway” so yah that happened

7) do you care about your ethnicity?

i care about it for other people. because i’m white, so i need to care and be conscious of the privilege i have as to not hurt other people, yknow?

8) what musical artists have you connected with most over your lifetime?

hollywood undead, sleeping with sirens, my chemical romance, and a few others. i look up to kellin and gerard way so much

9) are you an artist?

yes 😼

10) do you have a creed?

had to look that up and the answer is no

11) describe your ideal day

well in the perfect world brett would be alive. but in reality? wake up around 8-9, easy my way through the morning. grab coffee or an energy drink. go to the movies. eat ramen. listen to music all day. probably eat either sour patch kids or ice cream. that would be nice

12) dog person or cat person?

dog! i have a doberman mix named danny whomst i love very much. partial to snakes tho since i also have one

13) indoors or outdoors?

indoors all the way, fuck you bugs and sunburns

14) are you a musician?

i can drum pretty well. been wanting to pick up bass for when school starts. but i wouldn’t consider myself good enough to be a musician

15) 5 most influential books

this kinda ties into 1 answer with what books to read. but for me

percy jackson series, the song reader, lord of the flies, cirque du freak series (think that’s how you spell it...), and a boy called it

16) if you grew up in a different environment, would you be the same?

i think i’d be happier. more content with myself. but i think my main personality would be very similar

17) would you say tumblr is a fair representation of the real you?

in all honestly? it’s probably the MOST fair. i don’t have anyone i know irl on my tumblr, so i’m not thinking about who would be able to see my account. i can be myself, talk about my interests freely, it’s nice. i like tumblr.

18) what’s your patronus?

god i cant remember. i’d have to log into my pottermore to see, but i think it’s a dog breed of some sort.

19) harry potter house? would you be a muggle?

i’m a hufflepuff - to the surprise of absolutely no one

21) do you love easy?

that’s complicated. i think i fall in love with characters, but i don’t think i’ve ever genuinely been in love with a person. so i’m gonna day no

22) list top 5 things you spend doing in order

1. lay in bed

2. read fanfiction

3. listen to music

4. scroll social media (especially tik tok)

5. draw

23) how often do you wanna see your family a year?

as little as possible. maybe once or twice

24) have you ever felt like you had a mind meld with someone?

idk if this counts but sometimes it seems like you and i have the same thoughts in regards to talbotson it’s freaky. aside from that, the only other one i can think of is when my close friend and i figured out we are basically the same person; birthday and all. i’m a year and an hour older than her tho

25) could you live as a hermit?

easily. as long as i have music and a pencil/paper, and my phone? id be happy. food and drink too ofc

26) how would you describe your gender/sexuality?

pretty set in stone. i’ve known my gender since the 4th grade, and it hasn’t changed (feelings wise). i had to do a little self discovery for my sexuality but it didn’t take long to figure out i exclusively like guys

27) do you feel like your outside appearance is a fair representation of the real you?

meh. i guess. obviously being a non-medically transitioned trans person it’s not perfect? but i’m getting there :) and i’m pretty comfortable with myself

28) scale of 1-10 how hard is it for someone to get under your skin?

6 or 7. honestly depends on what the topic is but i’m fairly easy to get agitated i suppose

30) pick one of your favorite quotes

“we are the champions of the world”

MY EYES HURT FROM STARING AT THIS BUT I FUCKIN DID IT! AHA

#😼😼😼😼#take that #i spent like 30 minutes doing this #ask game

4 notes · View notes

karmanticmoved · 5 years

Note

1-85 uwu

j esus okay

1. describe yourself.

uh,, emotional ig, dumbass, quiet, exhausted all of the time, v queer, healthy mix of feminine and masculine, insecure, and not tha t great tbh. kinda a pussy ass b itch

2. if you could go anywhere for a week all expenses paid where would it be?

idrk. maybe somewhere like a hella nice beach in another country, maybe somewhere in europe. i like travelling but i hate the travel to get there and have no money so i havent put thought into it. maybe hawaii or somewhere like that.

3. do you have siblings?

the one thats still alive is my half brother

4. what is your favorite constellation, why?

orion maybe bc i don't know a lot but i can see that one from my bedroom window even in the city n idk. its comforting. or scorpius cause i'm a scorpio

5. favorite color.

yellow, pink, or blue.

6. what kind of music do you listen to?

almost anything. whatever catches my interest.

7. favorite flower. (you can name as many as you want cause flowers are awesome)

forgot what i said last time but those

yellow carnations i think?

8. if you could do magic, what is the first spell you would learn?

maybe smth to put myself to sleep immediately bc f uCk

9. favorite childhood memory.

my summer camp memories are pretty great. also memories of my dad and i going fishing are good.

10. have you ever been cheated on?

i mean in theory i couldve been bc online relationships but no. n im polyam and have identified as such for a majority of my relationships so no.

11. if you could describe your perfect room, what would it be?

big but not too big, yknow? like big enough that it can be filled and have room to walk around and lay on the ground or whatever but not Empty. and a pretty big bed to stretch out on, n a closet in the room. multiple windows w blackout curtains so theres light but it can be blocked out. n fluffy rugs or carpeting but preferably rugs in case smth spills so we can get it out of at least Remove the rug. and probably a cat tree thing in corner for dipper. n a computer desk and actual lights that light up the whole room. but probably,, fairy lights too bc full lights too bright. and i kinda want a pink room but blue or yellow work also. a nd pride flags on the walls + posters and various other stuff bc plain walls are boring. and tons n tons of b ooks too.

12. favorite animal.

river otter

13. what was the last photo you took of?

cat

14. do you believe in soul mates?

i'm not sure. i do kinda think there are people who you will like. really really click with and who become so important in your life that they're like. apart of u yknow? but i don't think that anyone as an individual needs to keep those people in their life forever. they arent destined to stay with them, and they shouldnt force that relationship (platonic, familial, romantic, or whatever) even if they were close for years and years. screw destiny. youll have people you care about, and sometimes you have to break that bond to save yourself, and thats okay. there will be other people who can and will be just as important. that got kinda off topic skbsks. i don't think theres really like Destiny soulmates. but there could be like. soulmates in the sense of for however long we're together, we're soul bonded. even if its not forever. does that even make se nse skbsns

15. do you hang toilet paper over or under?

over is the one thats socially acceptable right

16. your go to place to eat & your favorite thing to get there.

idk theres a place near a movie theater closeish to my house and its a nice little cafe and i dont eat there bc i dont eat much in general but i get their bubble tea and i love. raspberry bubble tea w rose popping bubbles. its comfort drink.

17. do you believe everything happens for a reason?

no. sometimes shit happens for no reason, and its bullshit, but you can't reverse it, so you gotta figure out how to move on from it.

18. guilty pressures?

im assuming thats meant to be pleasures

umm,, idrk. i don't know what exactly i like that would count as a guilty pleasure so,,

19. favorite mythical creature, why?

merpeople are s o cool i fuckin. love funky aquatic pals hell yeah. maybe im just Water babey but. they're rad. dragons are also hella cool bc like dragons???? theyre scaly and prett y and can breathe fire or have wings and kill u?? also like selkies bc again. water. but i used to hear a lot of stories abt them and theyre so nea t

20. something most people don’t know about you.

i have the potential to be a huge asshole and also kinda Wish to fuckin murder someone sometimes but. i act nice most of the time anyway.

not murder murder but i can get angr y enough that i just wanna Stab smth

21. where did you grow up, what was it like?

grew up kinda near the edge of the city, still in it but not like the main city area. in western washington. it was kinda rly boring, i used to spend a lot more time outside or just by myself playing with leaves or toys or whatever. when i had friends i played make believe w them even when outside of school. so yeah. boring id say.

22. do you believe aliens exist?

sure.

23. what was your last google search?

other than names for some actors n stuff, i was looking up various star wars things

24. what did your last relationship teach you?

the one that like. ended? i guess thatd be. be careful with your own feelings and try to figure them out before jumping into anything, and also don't try to force smth that in reality isnt really working.

25. would you relocate for love?

honestly yeah

26. do you hold grudges or forgive easy?

both. it just depends on how badly i or someone i care about was hurt by it. more likely to hold a grudge if a friend was hurt by someone d eep enough to leave a lasting impact or if they don't get a genuine apology i will be 🔫🔫. or if the person keeps hurting them. even if that person is also my friend.

27. favorite book.

favorite graphic novel is bloom by kevin panetta

favorite books in general are autoboyography, more happy than not, and what if its us. all gay. i know. its okay. im a kinnie.

28. do you consider yourself an extrovert or introvert?

introvert by far

29. have you ever kept a journal, do you now?

i tried once. i probably will have to once i go see a therapist, or at least one for my Bad Thoughts

30. top 5 favorite movies.

in no particular order

little shop of horrors, love simon, coco, it (2017 and 1990), and shazam! ig? maybe others but i definitely Forgot all the shit ive watched

31. do you believe that everything happens for a reason?

32. what is your greatest fear?

definitely gotta be all of the people i love hating me and abandoning me or secretly hating me and then leaving me without saying anything. and the worst part is im always afraid its gonna happen babeyy

33. favorite alcoholic beverage.

im baby

34. most embarrassing thing you’ve done.

im embarrassed by my own existence. i don't remember the Most embarrassing thing

35. do you believe in ghosts?

not until i have proof that i can actually trust and believe in

36. what is the best and worst part of your personality?

idk ig im nice. but im also. very easily set off on certain emotions especially the bad ones which sucks like especially jealousy bc i dont wanna!! feel jealous!! tho i think that ties into my greatest fear bc my brain immediately tells me im useless to everyone and they hate me. but. sometimes i get jealous and then feel bad for that and then hate myself for all of it. bc my friends deserve to hang out w other people and care about other people im just fucking stupid babey !!

37. should you split the dinner bill?

i rly don't get why you wouldnt tbh like if u both wanna be there u should both pay. but if one person gonna pay it should be the person that asked.

38. are you a good liar?

most of the time. when it comes to my mental health i can either lie great or im literally breaking down in front of the person so

39. what keeps you up at night?

depressing thoughts. anxiety about everything. wishing i could cuddle and fall asleep w jay. sometimes i just cant sleep bc im too restless.

40. would you rather go without your phone or music?

music. i need my phone to text my friends and i Need my friends

41. do you believe in god?

what god would let the world get to the point its at. what god would allow people to do such fucked up shit.

no. i don't.

42. how do you relax when frustrated?

cry, take a nap, take a shower, listen to music, cuddle dipper

43. what’s something that offends you?

when people go "oh yeah i support gay rights but im still gonna eat at chick fil a bc its good" like i get so fucking. pissed off by that. youre not gonna fucking s ta rv e without their goddamn chicken. i know a bi person who goes there and says its okay bc they dont Directly Give Their money to Specifically anti gay organisations but im just. ugh. fucking pissed bc there are other places to get food just avoid the one place for fucks sake. their food is good it doesnt matter. its like saying yeah pewdiepie is a bad person and nazi and a racist asshole but his videos r funni haha so im gonna watch him anyway

44. favorite food

i hate myself whenever i eat food

45. if you were on a 10 hour flight and could sit and talk to any person the entire time, who would it be?

@destinedformuchmore or @pinaplelee

46. when do you feel the most confident?

never? but ig i feel confident when working on tech construction during theater tech. as long as i know what im doing.

47. what do you do in your free time?

sleep. draw. cry. play video games. talk to my friends.

48. is there anyone who has completely lost your respect

matpat did for being a dick abt neopronouns and making a transphobic joke and only apologizing when a cis person told him to. not when hundreds of trans people did. and also other jokes that are inherently offensive to various groups. a n d for making extremely not Child friendly jokes in his videos which are very much targeted towards kids. say what you will about the target audience, there are a lot of children who watch them. please stop making creepy nsfw jokes if you won't even swear, sir.

49. have you ever broken someone’s heart?

i guess so yeah. but she also broke mine first.

50. did/do you play sports in school?

i did. i don't anymore bc highschool sports are bullshit but. basketball, ultimate, and soccer.

51. when are you happiest?

talkin 2 jay prolly

52. coffee or tea?

tea

53. what is one possession you own you wouldn’t want to live without?

my binder. or my stuffed cat puppet thing ive had since i was 7

54. what is the first thing you notice about a person?

their general emotions, mostly. like if theyre in a good mood or if theyre bored or distracted or whatever. or if they seem interested in actually talking to me

55. what is your favorite season, why?

fall. my birthday, the atmosphere is nice, it's pretty, its hoodie weather.

56. what makes you laugh?

stupid little comments or jokes my friends make tend to make me laugh a lot harder than i should but jabdn

57. are you a clean or messy person?

a mix. i Cannot have some things messy or i will ksjqkd. Die but i don't make my bed too often bc its ha rd when its against 3 walls.

58. what is important for a successful relationship?

communication communication communicati

talk about ur goddamn problems n keep talking to each other.

59. what was your upcoming like?

if thats supposed to be upbringing

idk, very relaxed. pretty easygoing and kinda boring.

60. favorite holiday?

any holiday in december rly. i don't celebrate a Lot but the atmosphere and others celebrating is nice to see. i kinda wish my parents did more to embrace the jewish part in our family blike. whatever. christmas is fun.

61. what is the first thing you’d do if you won the lottery?

give half of it to my parents. and then probably use it for plane ticket

62. what’s the best pizza topping combination?

hawaiian pizza. pinapple n canadian bacon ty

63. favorite outdoor activity.

frisbee

64. how are you? honestly.

not great. i want highschool to end.

65. would you rather go camping in the woods or stay at a beach resort?

idk. camping is fun but if i get to stay at the resort for free i would rly love 2 stay at a resort tbh ive never done that

66. what is the most beautiful thing in nature?

waterfalls. or rivers or just. water in nature. and very green forests. aNd snow.

67. favorite type of candy?

none

68. if your life was a book, what would be the title?

i can and will do arson, an autobiography

69. what movie quotes do you use of a regular bases?

i quote john mulaney and whatever my obsessions are pretty regularly

70. what was cool when you were young but not cool now?

silly bandz. pokemon cards. these weird unicorn figures i collected

71. what’s the craziest conversation you have ever eves dropped on?

im mostly the one having the weird conversations

72. what’s the most interesting documentary you’ve ever watched?

i watched one about dogs and cats and their evolution which was lit

73. what’s the worst hairstyle you’ve had?

when i let the lady just go fuckin ham on my hair bc i was watching spirit that horse movie and didnt wanna stop so it was. rly bad bangs and hella short in back but not the sides

74. what do you like to cook?

whatever im hungry for. i don't have the energy to cook a lot

75. what’s the coolest animal you’ve seen in the wild?

really pretty tropical fish

76. what’s the funniest tv show you’ve ever seen?

idk. i rly like schitts creek its pretty amusing

77. do you usually follow your heart or your head?

heart at first but my head if things get bad

78. what is your favorite quote?

"i have a splitting headache and i think i'm dying. how are you?"

or a character just saying "try harder" when another failed to do smth.

this is supposed to be deep or whatever but im in a Mood

79. what’s the weirdest crush you have ever had?

once had a crush on a character in a minecraft parody lmao

80. what’s your love language?

sending shit that makes me think of them. n just. making tons of stuff for them both online and irl like bracelets.

81. do you ever feel alone?

oh yeah. all the time. im not but it feels like i am which sucks

82. ever been bullied?

yeah

83. are you usually early or late?

late bc of my parents rip

84. what kind of art do you enjoy most?

drawing, or writing. also theater.

85. what do you wish you knew more about?

i just wish i could remember everything ive learned more about. i know a lot i just forget all.

id like to know more about forensics tho

#asks #long post #friends

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irepookie · 5 years

Text

Infinity Chapter 5

Summary: QUEEN AU where Rog (aka Rowan Queen) is a young single dad struggling to make it into music industry.

Warnings: not really. Just fluff, sappiness and swearwords here and there

Disclaimer: I don't own the pictures. The boys are based on Queen, but Piper, Gina and Callie are mine.

CHAPTER 4: MEET THE FAMILY PART II

In which Row and Gina finally confront each other.

"Thought you didn't want anything to do with us" Row made his presence noticeable for the woman sitting on the rocking chair.

He had been watching them for a couple of minutes, since returning from a last supply run for Piper's stuff. He was only gonna get a few more onesies, but ended up with:

3 rattles, six onesies (one of each color of the rainbow),

a nightlight (which, come to think of it was ridiculous because his room didn't have lids so it was never really dark due to street lamps)

and another two pinkies to add to the collection of 9 he already had at home.

Gina looked up from her granddaughter and to his son, who leaned against the doorway with arms crossed.

"If you can't beat them, join them. Is that what you're doing, mom?" He added, before she could speak.

"I'm not your enemy." She said

"Bloody seemed like it."

Gina sighed. She really didn't want to fight now, so she looked down to the infant again "Gotta admit she's gorgeous." She grinned.

He beamed proudly "You bet"

"And how are you?"

"Nearly as gorgeous"

"I mean mentally. Cause you look like shit"

"Why, thanks Mom"

She rolled her eyes. "How are you sleeping lately?"

"Funnily enough I can't sleep at night because I'm worrying about her. Really. Had a week when I could last sleep through and I couldn't"

"Good start"

"I'll manage"

"Just promise me something"

"Depends"

" If she's actually yours..."

"She's mine mum."

"Listen. There will be times when she won't let you be. On your bloody ears for days on end. I believe you made me lose half my auditive capacity. And that's stressful. Now, you've never been the best on anger management..."

"Mom..."

"Let me finish. It's normal. It will happen. You will probably want to suffocate her with a pillow -I did sometimes when you were this little-. If that or any close thought comes to mind just put her down and walk away from her, and hit something. Do whatever you have to do, and call me. I'll help you out. But put her down first somewhere safe. Understood?"

"Mum I don't need~"

"Understood?"

"Understood"

"It's not her fault"

"I know"

"Don't make her pay for it"

"I'd never"

"I hope so"

"Really mum. I love her. I'm gonna do my absolute best, I'll be the best dad ever, I will always be there for her, I'll put her always first, I won't let anything happen to her."

"I just don't understand why you want to do this"

He shrugged, reaching over to caress her warm cheek "I just can't get enough of her, I guess. I can't explain it. She makes me... I don't know. But I can't imagine her with any other last name or any other father."

Gina grinned to herself. It made perfect sense "Speaking of last names, you got a full name?"

"Oh yes um... Piper. Piper Rock Queen" he smiled

"Oh... Err, Rock?"

"As in Rock'n'Roll of course"

Gina couldn't help an eye roll "It's too late to talk you out of it, isn't it?"

"Very much so. She's already registered." Row smiled as he had already predicted mom wouldn't like it. The idea of naming her Gina had briefly crossed his mind, but that was more common. And he knew his daughter was special, so she deserved a cool, unique name.

"So Piper Queen" Gina looked.at the tiny being in her arms.

The mentioned opened her baby grey eyes as if she knew she was the topic of conversation.

Gina had to smile. She was beautiful. She already had Row's eyes.

"Hello there Piper . I'm grandma." She cooed instinctively.

Row would deny it, but he was relieved to hear her say that. She was there for him. For them. And that was more reassuring than anything.

"Yes, hello dearie."

She let out a distressed moan

Row looked at his watch "She must be hungry" then leaned over until he was inches away from his daughter, in her short distance field of vision "You wanna come with Daddy? I bet you do." He cooed, and carefully slid one hand under her the back of her neck and her back

"Mind the head"

"You're 8 days late" he said, taking her with ease -as he had been doing it for a week- and nestled her on the crock of his arm "Good morning, you beautiful thing. We're going home tomorrow. Yes we are, I'm so excited" he spoke with high pitched voice as he gently bounced her, and Gina had to admit that he was quite a natural.

The genuine love in his eyes was the same -or even more intense- as he had have 8 days before when he had first laid eyes on her.

But that could still change quickly, a little voice reminded her.

"You're so lovely, darling." Her son continued, eyes fixed on his new daughter as if she was the only thing that existed.

His daughter.

The realization that she was now a grandmother shrunk in Gina.

Damn she felt old

And if this was to become a tradition, 19 years from now maybe she'd be a great-grandmother.

God no.

She then registered what he had said

"You're getting discharged tomorrow?"

Row looked up at her voice as if he had been snapped out of a trance "uh?".

"You're getting discharged tomorrow?" She repeated

"Oh, yes" he smiled, looking down again "Yes we are. We're going home! Yes darling. And we'll have so much fun..."

"Do you have the equipment?" Gina had to interrupt their little conversation:

It was good that he was genuinely looking forward to it, but that didn't mean he had any clue or had thought about alll of the things a newborn needed. We're talking about a boy who tried to put the washer on without detergent, and who would always leave coins in his jeans when throwing them in the laundry.

He was capable of letting her sleep in the couch and feed her cow milk from a tin a can and a straw.

"Yes. The basics anyway. Carseat, clothes, bottles, formula, diapers, pinkies, more pinkies, more clothes... Oh, hopefully I'll get the boys to help me out building the crib. Haven't had the time yet"

"Where will she sleep until then?"

"With me in bed. I know it's dangerous cause I could suffocate her and blah blah blah, but that's not gonna happen. I'll be careful and... Well let's face it we're not going to sleep much, are we?"

Gina had to chuckle "You have it all thought through."

"Of course I do"

"Okay, not bad. What about bathing?"

"The sink will do cause she's so little, right?" he cooed, and she whined in response so he went to a bag and got a bottle out "Yes sweetheart, that's your milk. Yes. I'm gonna have it heated up for ya, okay? We'll get Callie." He smiled, and as if on cue, the young woman walked past the room. She stopped for a moment when seeing the older woman.

She smiled: she knew she'd come. She stuck her tongue out at Row when he noticed her, as if saying <<I knew it>> and he waved her away with a wink, tossing her the empty bottle so she could refill it.

Gina stayed the rest of the morning. She was curious, actually, about seeing her son as a father. Turns out he handled it quite well. Once she was fed, he changed her, played with her (game consisting on him making all sorts of faces to her as she stared intently up at him, one hand on his hair and the other around his index) until she got tired and fussy. After that, he only had to call Callie once cause he had really messed up with the swaddle and both him and his daughter had lost their nerves.

"There, all done. Don't worry baby, your daddy will get it eventually." The nurse cooed at the bundle, as Row scratched the back of his blond head.

She then turned to Gina with a bright smile, and repeated the same words she had told her When they had first met 8 days earlier.

"And you must be Grandma"

And this time, Gina smiled and nodded "I am"

Then the nurse turned to Row, whose attention was back to his child, and mouthed an "I told you."

And when he had have to go the the toilet and the babe had woken up, there had been nothing Gina could do that had calmed her down until Row finally came out and held her on his chest.

"Already a Daddy's girl. Goddamn it" the new grandmother commented with a slight grin of disbelief and marvel.

"Well I'm not complaining" Row smiled back, as he walked around the room in hopes he'd get her to sleep.

"Wait until girl wants daddy three times in the middle of the night" Gina half teased.

"Well, daddy will get up. As many times as she needs me I'm gonna be there" he kissed Piper's forehead, as she began to let her eyelids drop.

Her smile grew at the confidence in his words. Perhaps they could all make this work.

She watched as he walked the room a few more times, humming a little tune Gina hadn't heard before, and only when being sure she was off, he laid her down and sat on the sofa, between the cot and his mother.

"She's a real doll" Gina commented quietly as they both watched her sleep. "Or at least appears to be."

"Yea. She manages to stay cute even when she's crying like crazy."

"That's cause she's your daughter. I thought the same about you, but that's bullshit: every newborn baby is, objectively, ugly. But we love them anyway and that's why they become, in our eyes, the most beautiful thing in the world" she looked through her purse and got out a cigarette. (Remember this is the mid 80s, where smoking was allowed everywhere, as far as I'm concerned).

"No, mom. Not here" his eyes flicked to his sleeping daughter

"Why not?"

"It's not good for her."

"The cigarette's for me, not for her."

"She'd be second hand smoking. And her lungs are very vulnerable."

Gina scoffed. "Dear, I smoked through the first three months I was pregnant with you, then, as soon as you were out my butt, the first thing I asked for: a cigar. And then your father too. And you're fine"

"I had pneumonia three times as a kid"

"Oh please, don't you dare blame me for that"

"I'm sure they were related"

"That's bullshit! That's a bunch of shit the government made up to raise the price of cigars and rip us off!" Gina always raised her voice when sensing she was losing an argument.

Which never failed to set his son off too.

"It's a fucking scientific study!" He yelled.

"Says the boy who would take money from my jackets to buy tobacco at 15!!"

"Yea so?"

"Don't go all anti-smoking on me, when you smoke just as much!"

"I've quitted, just so you know!"

Gina laughed "Yes right." and put the cigar between her lips, getting a lighter out her pocket.

"Get the fuck out of here" he stood up, as he tried to contain his anger.

"What?"

"Get the fuck out of here!" He repeated, louder. He could handle her questioning him: they were both stubborn as hell and he was used to it. But he wasn't gonna let her get her way and disrespect him this time, especially when it was his baby and her health at stake.

"Oh c'mon Rowan"

"You light that shit up and you won't have to worry about being a grandmother, or a mother for that matter"

She froze and looked defiantly at him with at him with the corner of her eye.

"Was that a threat?"

"Of course it was!"

"Oh c'mon, you wouldn't be able survive on your own for a week, let alone taking care of a baby!"

"Just you watch! I don't need anything from you!" It wasn't true.

"Oh please! Don't be ridiculous. Last week today you lost the last copy of your flat's key, and guess who had to save the day? Oh, I got it, the same woman who helped you buy the damn house in the first place!!!"

"Well that's what you wanted, huh? 19 years up my ass, telling me how bad you wanted me to come of age so I'd be gone!"

"Yes because living with you was a nightmare! Always had to clean after you, and make excuses for you when one of your "conquers" from the night before turned up on my doorstep because you hadn't called them back or whatever bullshit! And now this?" She pointed at Piper

Row stepped in front of the cot protectively, staring menacingly at the woman "This what? Huh?"

"I don't know what the fuck you think you're playing to, but I ain't taking care of her when you get tired of pretending to be Mr.Mom!!!"

"Oh believe me I'd rather leave with a raccoon than with you"

"Well that's a relief. Any raccoon would have a more stable life and responsibility than you!"

"Oh yes any raccoon would have more support than what I'm having!"

"I told you where I stood from the beginning! I told you I'd wash my hands off you if you chose this!"

"Then what the fuck are you doing here now?! If you washed your hands off us, why did you come? To judge me? To repeat all the bullshit you already told me 8 days ago? Or to try and convince me to turn my back on her like you? Well, bad news for you, Gina, that ain't gonna happen. I love this kid unconditionally, more than anything, above myself and anything else, which is apparently way more than you ever loved me.

>>And you know how I know that? Cause I'll support her in everything. Even if I don't agree with it. And I won't push her, or put pressure on her to finish school or get a job. And if 19 years from now I've become a grandfather, I'll be there for them. And if she wants to drop out school cause she's sick of it, I won't force her. And if instead of a secure stable job she wants to follow a dream I can't even begin to understand, I'll help her in any way I can." He kept stepping closer to the woman as they made unbreakable eye contact, until she was against the wall, and snatched the cigar from her. "SO I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR BULLSHIT OR YOUR GODDAMN OPINIONS! SHE'S MY GODDAMN DAUGHTER, AND I SAY WHAT I WANT HER TO BREATHE!"

The small whine that usually preceded a cry broke the air, and Row instinctively reached over to put one foot on the cot's wheels to rock it back and forth and try to calm her down before she woke, holding his mother's defying gaze at all times.

It didn't work though and a wail escaped her lips, drawing her father's full attention as he turned around to look at her (with an automatic soft features that had nothing to do with the agressive behaviour he had showed no less than a second ago).

"Hey prune princess" he cooed, resting a hand on her stomach. He didn't want to pick her up while fighting with Gina. He didn't want to scare her further than he already had with that shout. "Hello sweet stuff. Everything's fine, go back to sleep, c'mon"

She whined again. Row sighed, leaning towards her untill their foreheads were glued so he was in her short distance field of vision and began to pat her tummy in gentle rhythmic patterns. He forgot Gina's presence, and their argument all together at the sight of her, because she was all that mattered.

She quieted down instantly, safe and warm below the familiar mop of blond hair that she already associated with calm and shelter. He remained in that position until she was asleep again, gradually slowing down the rhythm, untill he stopped.

But still he didn't move. He didn't want to. He didn't want to resume the fight with Gina. Why did every single one of their conversations have to end in an argument?

So he stayed glued to her, taking in all the strength and the power of will he was gonna need to face his mother again.

"I came here to meet her" she spoke, this time in a calm manner.

He sighed, pecking Piper's forehead before stretching up and turning around "And?"

She sighed. She sucked at this. But he -well, they- were her only family left. And inside, she had to admit she was at awe at his decision and determination to follow through.

Who said he couldn't make it work?

"And to apologise" she finally said.

"What for?"

"Oh you know it."

"Yea but she doesn't."

"She won't remember any of this."

"But perhaps one day she'll want to know, and I'll have to tell her Grandma was too proud to admit she was wrong."

Another eye roll "Alright." She walked to the small bassinet, which was still being moved back and forth by Row's foot "I'm sorry I was such a bitch about all this, dearie. I just know your... " She sighed, the next word still tasting weird in her mouth "your dad too well and I guess I'm worrying. Cause that's what family does. I just hope it's in vain this time. Good luck, you little bugger"

Row smiled. Gina's apologies wouldn't mean a thing without a couple insults towards him here and there. That was just her way.

And he guessed she had passed it down to him, just like one day Piper would get retention for shouting a few f words in kindergarten.

🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

Author's Note:

Please please whoever's reading this, reach me out. I'd really like to know if all this hard work is worth it!!! Reblog, Ask, Comment... Even a single emoji would make me smile.😍😍

And as always, Hola to my dearest @definitely-darcy whose marvelous mega-paragraphs help me improve way more than any English class ever has.

-Pookie

#queen band #roger taylor #single dad! roger taylor #ben hardy! roger taylor #queen fic #queen fanfiction #queen fandom #bohemian rhapsody #bohrhap #infinity fic #is anyone reading this #no smut just fluff #stories

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helenamayhathaway · 7 years

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Once you get this it would be cool if you posted ten facts about yourself and then passed this along to your ten favorite followers x

1. Really, truly, genuinely obsessed with mustard. I just love it so much, I want it all the time, I have mustard cravings. I once put mustard on toast and it was delicious?

2. I could literally talk about Avatar TLA for 9 hours on end. Like it’s literally perfect, it’s literally the most perfect show of all time, there’s literally nothing wrong with it except for the fact that Zutara wasn’t canon. I just, like it’s so good. It’s the best show ever, everyone should watch it, without that show I might not be a writer? I can’t even put it into words, oh my god, it’s so beautiful. Beautiful characters, beautiful music, beautiful story, beautiful character development, fuck, i love it so much oh my god

3. Anne Hathaway made me realize I was gay. There was this one weekend where I rewatched the Princess Diaries literally about six times, I just watched it over and over again, like I finished it and then started it over again, and I didn’t know why and then I was like “well fuck” because like??? Anne Hathaway??? is????? so??? pretty????????

4. I don’t have a favorite band, I have about four, and I love them all literally so much that I cannot say I love any of them more than the other. (They’re My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, Young Guns, and Paramore, for those who didn’t know)

5. I’m OBSESSED with murder. I literally cannot get enough of it. Like I don’t WANT to murder, but I don’t find myself interested in almost any TV shows unless murder is involved. I just love it, like it’s the most fascinating thing to me. It started off as just a love for mysteries, I think based on how much Scooby Doo I watched as a kid, but it evolved into a fascination with murder, both fictional and real life. Like I like to learn about real murders to, and I LOVE reading about serial killers, I just love it, I love it.

6. Talking about Scooby Doo, it’s not a “light” obsession with me. I own every single Scooby Doo movie ever made (except for Music of the Vampire, fuck that shit) AND every single episode of every single show) except Scooby Doo and Scrappy Doo because fuck Scrappy Doo). I just am completely infatuated with the whole show, I think it’s the best goddamn idea ever and the fact that it’s still going is amazing to me and Be Cool Scooby Doo is actually like really good and really truly after the heart of the original series. As a kid I owned two VHS tapes of Scooby Doo and not much else because we were pretty poor, but I rewatched those over and over and over and over again and I could name every single episode that was on there, I just I really care about Scooby Doo, I know to some people it was this fun little cartoon from their childhood but for me it’s something really deeply emotional and the way in which I grew up on it I think I genuinely can say it helped shape who I am today.

7. I’m obsessed more than is entirely healthy with board games. I’m addicted to the show Table Top and have a board game night at least once a week. I cannot get enough of them, it’s my favorite activity of all time. I genuinely am considering trying to have a career in creating board games or in creating Table Top RPG’s like Dread, because it’s my favorite format of storytelling and my favorite thing to do, like I literally love board games so much. (Some of my game recommendations include The Resistance, Ticket to Ride, Betrayal at House on the Hill, Coup, One Night Ultimate Werewolf, Forbidden Island, Gloom, Superfight, and The Meta Game).

8. I’ve met a shit ton of famous people. It’s one of the things I’m most proud of. I’ve met Karen Gillan, Neil Gaiman, M.T. Anderson, Patrick Rothfuss, Mara Wilson, Gerard Way, Gustav Wood, all of the band Set It Off, all of the band All Time Low, and Dan and Phil. I’ve met some less notable people as well, mainly authors, but those are some of the bigger names.

9. I wrote my first book when I was in 7th grade. It was a shitty ass self insert novel about a Mary Sue who met a boy at an open mic night and fell in love with him and they bonded over the band the Plain White T’s, and there was a school shooting and she was like ~~beautifully depressed~~ and it was just real bad guys it was real bad. The second book I wrote I completed in literally about a week, like I came up with a story and then I just wrote and I wrote and I wrote, and I barely ate that week, like I literally COULD NOT stop, and it’s about 150,000 words so like it’s a real ass novel. It’s actually got a pretty good story despite the fact that the writing isn’t so hot and I am considering trying to publish it someday once I heavily revise it.

10. A lot of my fics are based on stories I came up with in high school. Chance is based on a story I wrote a whole one chapter of, it was a hell of a lot straighter and not good at all. When We’re Both Thirty had about five chapters and came from something like 8th or 9th grade? It was also a hell of a lot straighter and I believe the main characters were called Annie and Jake (and Jake was based on Tony from Skins cause he was just like so hawt omfg ermagherd lol). Lastly, Daylight was also somewhat based on an old story I had, I wrote down the summary of it in 9th grade but I never wrote any of it, I only ever had the summary, and I started writing it I think Freshman year of college, and then like four years later actually put it out into the world.

#septembercrypt

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thatbrontide · 7 years

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1. selfie: Look up a picture of an obvious meth addict. Stare at it with deep love. 2. what would you name your future kids? Euclid, Anya 3. do you miss anyone? I truly miss myself 4. what are you looking forward to? Learning to cook 5. is there anyone who can always make you smile? Tig Notaro I guess. 6. is it hard for you to get over anyone? I have been painfully missing my ex (the nice one) lately. Knife-to-gut type shit. It's ridiculous. 7. what was your life like last year? Worst yr of my life by far. An abusive relationship and a psych med prescription I was coerced into left me suicidal, blank, and eventually cussing at doctors in a psych ward. I lost the best job I've ever had as well as my writing skills and confidence. I lost my social due to the abusive relationship. Currently trying to recover. 8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed? probably as a kid. I've cried from frustration before. 9. who did you last see in person? Andrew and Miles. A cousin and a dude I want to be better friends with. 10. are you good at hiding your feelings? People have asked me why I’m so depressed when I felt fantastic. I had to train myself to smile when I feel happy because I realized you were supposed to do that. So. Yes. 11. are you listening to music right now? No but I just left a house show. 12. what is something you want right now? Sleep 13. how do you feel right now? Hungry, empty, nervous, serious 14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you? there are at least seven sexes. And tonight. 15. personality description. This type of self-awareness seems impossible. Ppl have told me I’m odd and hard to pin down. 16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t? A lot, yeah 17. opinion on insecurities. most have them, don’t judge people because insecurities are there for complex reasons and people are trying their best. Support people, compliment them. I can't believe how many ppl just assume a person isn't shit just because the person is struggling with confidence. Be compassionate, asshole. 18. do you miss how things were a year ago? A year ago was literal hell. I was having full-on panic attacks several times a day, dealing with a partner who called me a piece of shit and constantly gaslighted me and crossed my physical boundaries, and suddenly feeling like a completely/permanently different and much less intelligent/capable person. So. No. 19. have you ever been to New York? about 40 times. My maternal side of the family is there. Grew up on LI beaches and going to Broadway shows and museums in NYC. As a kid I thought that was where I was meant to have grown up, like something fucked up happened and it messed up my life's beggining. 20. what is your favourite song at the moment? something by Russ 21. age and birthday? aquarius leo leo 22. description of crush. Thomas Middleditch is such a dreamboat to me but I know it's an unhealthy projection thing. The only real person I have any tiny crush on is this gymnast in my philosophy class. He's very cute. 23. fear(s). Not getting my self back, not being in a loving, paramount relationship again. 24. height. Not tall enough 25. role model. UCB celebrities 26. idol(s). Laura Kightlinger 27. things i hate. doctors, the education system, when ppl are not inclusive, long nails, when ppl blast headphones and watch videos in public w/o headphones. Fuuuuck you 28. i’ll love you if… you're bizarrely funny, have a certain demeanor, seem to understand struggle 29. favourite film(s). natural born killers, the original hairspray. Junebug was nice, Get Out was brilliant 30. favourite tv show(s). Broad City, Silicon Valley, Insecure, Key and Peele 31. 5 random facts about you. I was raised Jewish, babies are generally not cute, growing up ppl asked if I was anorexic when I wasn't, I once spent an afternoon in a Tel Aviv emergency room, hitchhiking was the most liberating experience. 32. are your friends mainly girls or guys? both/other 33. something you want to learn. How to fight physically, how to stop coming across as someone who deserves to be fucked with 34. most embarrassing moment. One time I went to an independently owned hardware store to speak to the manager about a job and buy a wooden rod. The guy was such a fucking asshole and misogynist that when our conversation concluded, I walked out of the store accidentally ‘stealing’ the rod. The fucker ran after me. It was embarrassing mostly because he made me so goddamn uncomfortable about simply asking for a job. I hate that fucking guy. 35. favourite subject. Philosophy, language 36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill? Be interviewed on a talk show, write a memoir, travel everywhere 37. favourite actor/actress. No clue 38. favourite comedian(s) Morgan Murphy, Louis CK, Jon Mulaney, and Maria Bamford. Sommore kills me sometimes. 39. favourite sport(s) um. Slolom. Idk. 40. favourite memory. Laughing rly hard as a kid all the time 41. relationship status. As single as possible 42. favourite book(s). Bluets by Maggie Nelson 43. favourite song ever. Maybe something by the blood brothers 44. age you get mistaken for 25? Idk 45. how you found out about your idol. Watching a library DVD of 90s comedians. Mary Jo Peele was so good. 46. what my last text message says. I'd be happy to meet w u tho 47. turn ons. Genuine kindness, good humor, good shoes 48. turn offs. Arrogance, bad breath, hipsterness 49. where i want to be right now. Asleep on a cloud 50. favourite picture of your idol. I've barely ever seen her 51. starsign 52. something i’m talented at. I have a good eye for style. I could have been great at art. 53. 5 things that make me happy. Color, dogs, remembering, a good melody, a good dance 54. something that’s worrying me at the moment. Just life. I'm worried about myself for real 55. tumblr friends. i don’t rly have online relationships 56. favourite food(s) guacamole 57. favourite animal(s) dogs, opossums. 58. description of my best friend. We had an overdue falling out. She is mean. 59. why i joined tumblr. to document inspiration

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destiny-smasher · 7 years

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So I did the “get to know me” meme on Twitter but because of how Twitter functions now it’s a hard to follow mess of a thread. Decided to post it all here -- and hey, if any of ya’ll are curious, feel free to read.

1) When I was 10 my abusive stepdad threw a spray at me. I ducked -- it scraped my head. Sent to school bleeding b/c he was too stoned to realize it'd get noticed and I'd get pulled out of that environment immediately. This moment changed my life, left a scar on head.

If I hadn't ducked, would've hit my stomach. No cut. Whole childhood would've been different. My first Butterfly Effect Moment.

2) I started writing fiction about Pokémon. First-person, from the Mons perspective. Rotating point of view each scene.

3) I moved on to crazy crossover fanfic where I constructed an entire war, personal and political motivations, so many ideas I still like?

4) Part of this involved detailed drawings of Mario-themed Keyblades I wish I still had.

5) Paper Mario 1&2 are some of my most influential inspirations. expanded such a simple world so much so fluidly. (Harder than it looks)

6) When I was a kid my sister would wake me st like 6am to watch dubbed Sailor Moon. Bothered me they all sounded like same person.

7) I can recognize voices very well and even specific sounds and songs. Couple years back my roommate ran a test - playlist of 100 NES tracks, he'd play the first NOTE, singular, and I could recognize exactly where it was from if I'd played the game.

8) My first computer was a PC I bought w/$ saved up during an entire summer of custodial work in HS. Had no Internet.

So I'd use the public library's very slow connection to download things to floppy disk and copy them over.

Eventually, I was able to graduate to a USB. Obtaining music was hellish so I treasured each song I could download -- most from OC Remix.

9) We had this tiny rabbit ears TV that could get WB and Fox sometimes if it was set up in a specific corner of my sister's room

And so I would desperately use it to try and stay up to date on Pokémon and Digimon, it was so bad

10) Teen Titans was arguably the most influential piece of media for my teenage mind. It formed the base of so much I care about re:stories

Fleshed out, varied protags who grew together and each had their times to step up and step down. Action w/character dev context.

Fantastic themes important for growing humans; awesome moments "between the panels" instead of all comic book melodrama and action.

Then everything changed when TT GO attacked and pissed on everything smart and thoughtful because MONEYYYYY

11) Cowboy Bebop was the first "good" anime I ever saw and blew my mind open about what animated stories could do -- i.e. Not just kid stuff

I don't like "anime" in general because most of its common tropes but the shit out of me even worse than most western toon tropes

And yet like 50-75% of my most favorite shows ARE anime because thoughtful animated storytelling has so much potential.

11) I predicted months before Last of Us came out that you'd play as Ellie but when it happened I had to stop, cry happy tears.

I predicted the second I saw the Left Behind trailer what was going on w/those two and again, still had to stop and cry happy tears.

(I seem to have pretty good gaydar now but I also don't like, ship everyone together all the time)

It just hits me so hard when actual canon queerness happens in mass media and is done well, but we're still so bad at following through.

12) Favorite m/m ship: Troy and Abed in the Morning. Favorite w/w ship: Max and Chloe BFF Pirates 2008.

ATLA ships: Tokka the most, also Katang, also Smellershot. ATLA makes me more open to shipping than any other series?

Like, Zutara makes me feel kinda gross and some of the crack ships like Sokka/Azula scare me but otherwise I'm pretty chill w/ATLA ships?

13) When I was a kid, and we'd role play, I always wanted to play the girl characters. I was surrounded by boys so they always were weirded.

It was weird to me, too, honestly.

Now it makes perfect goddamn sense.

14) Apparently I was kidnapped as a baby by some mobster or something but it's hard to tell with my mom what's real or not.

15) Smash Bros. Melee was the first game I ever got genuinely hype over before launch. I still remember being startled to discover it --

-- existed via E3 trailer on GameTrailers back on my goddamn dialup connection in 2001. I had to wait all fuckin' day for that thing to load

And when it did, it was GLORIOUS (and had FZero music, which at the time I did not recognize) and I was FLOORED.

The screenshots made the game look too good to be real, and I was instantly sold on the GameCube, the first time I NEEDED new hardware Day 1

I got SSBM as an Xmas gift before my grandpa's GCN present arrived, so for a week or two all I could do was stare at the box/manual/disc

That game kind of changed my life -- SSB64 was the first time I'd gotten so invested in a multiplayer game, and SSBM crushed it.

A fire was born in me -- competition, something I'd never been much interested in w/games before, not against actual humans.

Those months between E3 2001 and finally getting to play SSBM felt like forever. And thus did I post online fiction for the first time.

That's actually how I met @SDiDuro , my first 'Internet friend' and what I'd consider to be my first proper 'reader.'

16) After college, I ended up working at a call center because it was the only job I could find and I needed to support my disabled wife.

DURING college, I gave up on writing fiction and had focused on gaming editorial through a site where I'd engaged with an online community

But that empty space between phone calls eventually got filled in by writing fiction on a notepad, with a pen, inspired by Street Fighter 4.

Eventually, this evolved and radically changed into what is now (still in dev) DownRight Fierce.

Back then, I had no idea I'd be motivated to DO this, though -- write original fiction -- but the fire had been re-lit.

I wanted to write.

I was sickened by my "naive" adolescence crossover fics and wiped them from my http://FF.net profile and started anew.

Having just come off of ATLA 1st time, I knew I wanted to explore that world/characters more, so I wrote a story about Toph & puberty.

That serving as "practice," I then went on to write SRU, and...well, that...changed EVERYTHING.

17) My biological dad (who I have never met) has OCD, to the point where he apparently washed his skin raw trying to avoid germs?

So as soon as I showed enthusiasm in gaming, my parents FREAKED and worried I was exhibiting OCD and they brought the hammer down.

They made me feel BAD for writing about video games when I wasn't playing them, but they never READ anything I fucking wrote.

Even now, my mom tries to comment on what a good writer I supposedly am, yet when I ask for her thoughts, I ask what she's read?

Silence.

I wasn't writing fiction based on games because I was THAT addicted to games.

I did it because a storyteller was awakening within me --

-- and I told stories through the worlds and characters I was familiar with.

(And my first genuinely "serious" fic was Teen Titans, anyway)

But even now, it really hurts that my parents will sometimes try to guilt me over not calling or whatever the fuck, when they never READ

never supported, and actively DISCOURAGED my writing, my storytelling, refused to understanding why I loved games.

18) I never watched Avatar until after college (years after it had finished), and I watched it because of the live action movie.

I watched halfway through the season 1 of the cartoon to get "read up" on it. Then the movie. Which was horrible. Then the rest of season 1.

At that point, the movie utterly baffled me. My wife and I proceeded to marathon the rest of the series. And it became my fav story ever.

But I ironically owe it to that terrible live action movie. ^_^;;

19) My taste in music is really weird. I couldn't tell you what my favorite genres are, and even fav musicians is hard.

Like, every year my top three fav musicians "change" because I just add more to the pile and spend the year focused on their music.

But music inspires my storytelling more than any other medium, I'd say -- in terms of me actually planning and growing ideas.

I didn't just give Nishiko and Seiko last names of my two fav game composers as tongue-in-cheek. In fact, that's not why I did it at all.

I gave them those names because I wanted some element of their very design to express how Japanese composers inspired me in my teen years.

#get to know me #personal

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simonslittlepuff · 8 years

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THANK YOU FOR 600 FOLLOWERS. HERE’S SOME FACTS.

since I said I’d write something for my 500 followers and I never did (sorrysorrysorrySORRY), I’ve decided to tell everyone a bit about myself since I’ve gained so many new followers recently! Thank you for 600!!!!

So hey dudes, I’m Ashlea (or ash to most people). My name is said as you’d say Ashley. I feel I should clarify as when I used to do drama I was called ash-lee-a every goddamn lesson. Yes it’s been like 8 years. And I am still bitter.

I turned 16 on the 6th of December and now I can legally get my learners (for driving a car) and I can get my license to fly a plane. I’m not doing either, for the record. I don’t trust myself with my life or anyone else’s in metal death traps.

I’m from Melbourne, Australia, meaning that I’m on holidays until the end of January, then back to hell. I’m not looking forward to it. Although I dont hate school, it’s really not my favourite thing lol.

I have a little brother who is 12 and going into high school this year and I’m scared for him. I was so stressed out that I went for a leadership role just to spy on him. I got that role by the way. its not that he’s not a good kid, I just have really bad anxiety and i just want him to be happy and settled in.

TW// MENTAL ILLNESS: Speaking of anxiety, I have social and general anxiety which is SO FUN. I’m also depressed and I’m hopeful going on meds in like march. Yikes. I know. is anyone ever truely happy tho? #deep

ANYWAY BACK TO HAPPY I love theatre and music, and have since I was like 9 or 10. Just blame glee and the show tunes they played. I saw wicked when I was 7 (holy fuck that’s ages ago) with my mum and my aunty at the regent theatre and from then wicked has been one of my favourite musicals. Then when I was 11 I saw Annie and knew from then wanted to be on that stage one day. Last year I saw wicked again at a local theatre with my friend who’s favourite musical is wicked. It was his first time seeing it and I’ve never seen him so happy. My favourite musicals include Wicked, Hamilton, In The Heights and The Book Of Mormon.

Not to crush my dreams from the last 7 years, but I can’t sing, so broadway will never be for me. It was an actual heartbreaking moment for me when I realised that a few years ago lmao. So broadway is out of the picture. I guess I could still act because I’ve wanted to do that for as long as I could remember, but even then it’s very rare to get an acting role. So that leaves writing. I decided after reading Fangirl for the first time that I was going to use the talent I was told I had, and be a writer when I grew up. So far I procrastinate writing everything so it’s not going too well. oh well.

I used to be emo for like 3 years but I’m not now and thats the main thing. I dont know what music I really listen to now other than soundtracks wow.

i love anime. So much. I am weeb as fuck. Save me. I love Yuri on ice and free way too much. I also love Sherlock and that’s emotionally destroying me atm. i want to die the more i think about how season 4 will end.

That’s all. Feel free to message me whenever oh my gosh I would love some new pals !!! I genuinely hope everyone is having a good day, and if you’re not you can vent to me all you want on anon and I’ll be there for you. Love you and thank you for 600 followers. Never in my wildest dreams did I think i’d gain 600 new friends so fast. Thanks for coming on this snowbazzy journey with me.

- ash xxxxxxxxx

#i didnt include any carry on in this wow #well i suppose you all know im obsessed with it #why else would i have this blog #sorry if this is long #you dont have to read it :))#personal

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dawnajaynes32 · 7 years

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Inside the Mind of Aaron Draplin

Aaron Draplin will be judging PRINT magazine’s 2017 Regional Design Awards—now open to both professionals and students. Enter today before it’s too late!

Words by Rebecca Bedrossian

Surprise.

Poster design by Aaron Draplin for the 75th anniversary of PRINT magazine.

That was Aaron Draplin’s reaction when he got the call from HOW—to feature him again. According to the Portland, OR, graphic designer, the story hasn’t changed all that much. And to his point, there’s no lack of Aaron Draplin or Draplin Design Co. coverage on the World Wide Web. So much so, that I felt a bit of trepidation about the interview.

What could I unearth that hadn’t been covered before? And why would someone read this story?

My trusty go-to list of questions weren’t going to work for me. I didn’t want to write something that’s already been published. And I certainly didn’t want Draplin to roll his eyes during our chat. I realized I needed his help to build a new narrative. So I came clean and asked: What do you want to say that hasn’t been said before?

Art by Aaron Okanaya

It broke the ice and set the stage. We didn’t focus on his work for Nike, Ride Snowboards, Sub Pop Records, his numerous posters, album art and logo designs, nor his personal Field Notes brand, and we deliberately avoided his Lynda.com logo design tutorial that went viral last year. Been there, done that, and he designed the T-shirt. Instead our organic, candid and, as you’d expect from Draplin, entertaining conversation covered age, gratitude, family, and a book. While it sounds more Kumbaya than you’d expect from this born-and-bred Midwesterner, it comes with its fair share of self deprecation and the occasional f-bomb.

Draplin doesn’t beat around the bush. “How much more of this story do you want to hear?” he asks, honestly curious. “I’ll just never really be comfortable with being some kind of commodity.” He wonders about the saturation level, and admits that the pressure’s on, because the big names in design reinvent themselves. “Every three years, there’s a new talking point, taking a year off, a documentary,” he explains. “I’m just trying to get away with shit—that hasn’t changed.”

Art by Aaron Okanaya

At 41, Draplin wears his “middle age” as a badge of honor. “Every year I know myself a little better. Every year, there’s a refinement process.

“I can remember being 20 and talking to a 45-year-old. They were old. They were different. They wore a different type of clothes. They were beat down and said things like ‘my old lady,’ ‘those bastard kids.’ It was really cliché. Now I can’t tell when a guy is 55. It’s just how they carry themselves and how they laugh. My favorite rock ‘n’ rollers are 55 years old and you wouldn’t know it, because of the way they run their lives. That’s inspiring.

“There are weeks I work every day. You don’t get to put them in the bank. That goes to Uncle Sam. And they go and drop fucking bombs on developing countries with it or whatever the latest bullshit they’re doing. It hurts. I would hope they’d go build homes for people. I’d feel a little better about that.”

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With age comes self-reflection, and Draplin is grateful. “Aren’t we lucky to be alive, to punch into design every day? As I get older, it’s better to be chill about stuff.”

And chill he is. He didn’t get to be design’s big draw without his share of critics along the way. Finger-pointing is a waste of time, but the web hands everyone a bullhorn, and it’s frustrating. “That’s something that people expect from me, to be an incendiary character just for the sake of doing it. That is not the case, I wouldn’t do it,” says Draplin, throwing in a technical term for good measure. “You don’t want to shit where you eat.”

Draplin’s genuine love for design surfaces when he speaks about life after the limelight fades—and make no mistake, he knows it will. “When all this stuff fizzles, I’ll go back to living the life of why I got the call in the first place. Working on my own, loving it, and not knowing any better. That’s kind of a cool thing.”

His gruff demeanor, plain speaking, ball cap, and healthy beard led one wag to call him the “Yukon Cornelius of American Design,” but, Draplin says, “there is nothing blue collar about what I’m doing. We live manicured lives.”

Yes, he likes to work with his hands, mocking things up, the very analog and tactile qualities of design, but the reality is Draplin can usually be found pecking away at the computer in his shop, a hotel room, or on a plane. The prolific designer makes his way to design events large and small across the country. He travels on Wednesdays, speaks on Thursdays, and returns home on Fridays. “The more I get done on the plane, the more time I have free on the weekend,” Draplin says with a chuckle, “to have fun like normal people.”

TIME OUT

Though he loves what he does, he’s tired and questions how long he can keep up the pace. “Why are we working so much? Because we don’t know any better,” he says adamantly. “It’s all we know how to do. The world just holds us down. I got ahead by working a ton. And then what? How much more money do you need?”

He’s finally stopped worrying about money, because—honestly—he doesn’t even have the time to spend it. This has been tough for Draplin. He grew up in Traverse City, MI, and has seen people struggle. “And I have these carrots dangling in front of me,” he explains, “how can I say no to any of it?

“You’re taught to budget, to be smart and to keep everything in the positive. Then you wake up and realize, uh-oh, that wasn’t the way to do it.

“I don’t know how to solve becoming smaller. I don’t know how to solve becoming healthy. I don’t know how to solve not working so goddamn much.”

But he’s trying. Draplin now leaves the shop at 8 instead of midnight. It’s baby steps. And it feels like a luxury.

“I don’t ever want to worry,” Draplin admits. “I know what it’s like to have nothing. I haven’t had to think about buying a record for about seven years. That to me is such a success.”

WIRED FOR SOUND

“I know Aaron hoards music of all kinds,” says Robin Hendrickson of ATO Records. “I get to see him flexing and working out album art that bounces off the classic tradition of record covers. His first comps are a thrill. He’ll show you a wide range of possibilities, some you asked for and some you didn’t. It’s like the ideas are exploding out of him, almost too fast to capture. His work is clean, but never sterile or boring. Somehow it reflects his personality, which is gruff but never unkind.”

Hendrickson continues, “He’s clearly studied—and absorbed—the language and history of 20th-century American vernacular graphic design, but his work never devolves into retro pastiche.”

You can’t have a conversation with Draplin without sensing his respect for design—its history, its unsung heroes, and his contemporaries. He stays on the prowl for overlooked graphic treasures and celebrates them. Sure, he’ll drop the occasional Saul Bass or Eames reference, but he’s not precious about it. “I don’t want to be too professional, too serious, too on point or on strategy, because people choke on it”

This is unusual—when there’s so much value placed on how you present yourself to clients and where there’s no shortage of articles touting five ways to be more productive, make a good impression, or look smarter in meetings—but it’s pure Draplin. It’s part of his allure, refreshing, and he owes it to dad.

LIKE FATHER LIKE SON

Visit draplin.com and you’ll find an entire section—an anomaly in the business of design—dedicated to his father, Jim Draplin. You see the love, and then hear it when Draplin speaks about him. “We lost my dad a year and a half ago. I don’t want to be the person who doesn’t talk about this shit. He died. I’m trying to make light of it, because he used to make fun of that shit.”

Draplin’s tone is light as he describes his dad as an incredible character, larger than life, who sometimes opened his shows for him. He admits sometimes the crowd didn’t know what to make of him. “He was as comfortable in front of a tool-and-die shop as much as he was in front of a bunch of nerdy designers, telling crass jokes, Don Rickles style. I’m so thankful I celebrated him viciously while he was around.

“I mimic my dad in terms of my design career: the business practices of how to enjoy your life and how to make things—how to laugh. That’s what I took from him,” explains Draplin. “It’s been cool to apply it to the stuffy thing of design. It’s been refreshing to defy some of that shit with it. People don’t know how to laugh.

“Dad kept me on my toes. He always made time. So getting in front of a client just reminds me of how my dad could loosen things up.” Draplin laughs, then continues.

“And look at me talking so much about my dad all the time. He always hogged the limelight. Still is! I need the world to know that without my mom, I’d be nothing. Fact.”

ON PAPER

That practice of loosening up came in handy when John Gall, creative director at Abrams, called about making a monograph. Draplin countered with, “Don’t you do this at the end of your career?” Excited and equally leery to get a big-league call, Draplin plans to keep it little league—as authentic and naive as possible. “It’s got to feel real to me,” he says.

Abrams has a history of publishing books by great designers and, though it’s early in the process, you can bet the Draplin book will be a bit of a departure. It won’t be a typical design monograph. How could it be? And Gall recognizes the value in that.

“I’ve been looking at younger/mid-career designers and wondering why they don’t have books, and if there is even an audience for such a thing,” Gall explains. “Most graphic design books we see are super expensive monographs by older or dead designers. I started looking at people the same age as Stefan Sagmeister was when Abrams published his first book. These are designers who came of age during the internet and social media era. These are voices we haven’t really heard from in book form yet. And they have a lot to say about how to make it in the design world today.

“Aaron’s style is rooted in utilitarian American design, but not totally as he’ll happily incorporate a lovingly designed Swiss grid. He’ll pull from the cool overlooked moments of the 1970s, but then something like Field Notes comes from another place entirely,” continues Gall. “He’s the designer all the kids want to be when they grow up. He has opinions and he’s willing to express them (even if he has to step on some toes), but he’s also a really nice guy with a strong sense of where he came from. He’s an inspiring speaker and entertaining graphic design raconteur. He makes beautiful things that you want to have. Beautiful lovingly printed objects. Aaron makes being a graphic designer look like the best job in the world.”

When I asked Draplin about the book, he goes straight to the Abrams site and tells me that it will live in close proximity to the Eames book. E follows D after all. Draplin says, tongue in cheek, that though the book will make him look “smart and articulate,” he’s not going to pass up this opportunity. It will be his guide to messing with the world of design.

“I take it very seriously how I don’t take it seriously,” he says.

After all, entertainment is a tricky business.

This article is from the Summer 2015 issue of HOW. Since it was published, Draplin’s stellar “Guide to messing with the world of design” earned a place on our sister site PRINT’s 25 Best Design Books of the Year.

The 2017 PRINT RDA: Extended Deadline. Enter Now!

Enter the most respected competition in graphic design—now open to both pros and students—for a chance to have your work published, win a pass to HOW Design Live, and more. 2017 Judges: Aaron Draplin / Jessica Hische / Pum Lefebure / Ellen Lupton / Eddie Opara / Paula Scher. Student work judges: PRINT editorial & creative director Debbie Millman and PRINT editor-in-chief Zachary Petit.

Draplin image: Leah Nash. Hische: Helena Price. Lupton: Michelle Qureshi. Scher: Ian Roberts.

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