#i have lots of videos of her howling if you're wondering

[sage-nebula]

If I play video of my dog howling, it always makes her start howling again IRL. She's basically like, "I said it before, and I'll SAY IT AGAIN." Honestly gotta respect her commitment to her word.

[rhokisb]

A Note to You, Now that You're Gone

Hey babe,

Just me again. Still thinking of you every single day. Still wondering where you ended up. If you're watching from your palace in the stars. If you're still dancing on cosmic dust. If you're laughing at our struggles from beyond.

I got little G some presents for Christmas. Sent it to grandma's house. I signed it Tante Lala. I hope he remembers. "Hi Lala!"

Sal's here for Christmas. I did good. Held it together until we got home tonight. That's when I really started to miss you.

Remember when you were pregnant with little man and we went to the maternity store together and I bought those pregnancy leggings and tried on the "baby bump" so we could take a picture of us bumping together? It's still one of my favorite memories. It was one of the last times I saw you while you were still home. I wore those tonight. Nothing was stopping me from turkey and ham. You would have loved dinner tonight. If you moved back you could have come.

I wish I could send you a Christmas message this year. I wish I could call you now, with this headache and heartache, and just lay on the floor screaming "FUCK" with you. In my heart of hearts I know that this year would have been torture for you. I know that HE probably wouldn't have let you see little man for Christmas. I know it would have been more heartache. I understand why you aren't here with us anymore. I do. I really do.

It doesn't make it stop hurting though. I still feel like I failed you, that I wasn't there for you enough, that I should have tried harder to come and see you when you said things were really bad.

I got him Minecraft stuff. A plush dog and a Ghast shooter. I'm not gonna lie, I just...really want little G to annoy the shit out of them with it. I thought you might get a kick out of it if you're up there watching us all.

I choose to believe that you have your phone wherever you are. I send you funny videos almost every day. I Snapchat you. I re-read our texts over and over again. Maybe one day I'll be able to show little man how funny we were and how much joy you brought to everyone who knew you.

I'm so mad I can't tell you about the family drama this year. You'd be howling. Probably be telling me to let it go and to stop being so dramatic, but you know me. I wish I could tell you about how this summer went--despite it being shitty after...you know...you left us. I'd love to send you photos of Sticky and how much she loves me. She pulled me out of the pit, this little 5-year-old saved me more than she'll ever know. Every time she comes and sits with me I just wrap her in my arms and hug her so tight. I know you're not supposed to pick favorites but I have to admit she's mine. I'll do anything for her for the rest of her life. Beans too, of course, but Sticky and me got something special. She reminds me a lot of you. I think you'd even agree if you got to meet her. Little firecracker. I hope that if/when Little G gets to come visit I can introduce them. They're only a few weeks apart in age, and I could see them getting along. Who knows. Maybe your sister will get custody and then they can be besties.

I'll watch "Filth" and "Party Monster" and "Love Actually" this year again. I'll probably still live text you while doing so. I watched "Sinister" recently and laughed at buddy's depression sweater. I asked your mom to grab yours when she cleaned out your apartment. Not sure if she found it or not. I haven't been to see her yet. We both agreed things were still too fresh and we were still both too angry about...everything. But soon. I promise soon.

I hope that, wherever you are, you get to spend this Christmas with Little G. I hope he feels your love surrounding him this year. I hope he knows that you will always be with him. Keeping him safe. Watching over him.

We got things here on the ground, Momma-Bear. The fight isn't over. Not by a long shot.

I love you endlessly, Mags. Forever and always. You're my best friend, that's never going to change. Not in a million years would that ever change. So wait for me. Don't get distracted up there. I'll see you in time.

[elusive---ivory]

The Woman In Velvet pt 14

Oof, second to last chapter, boys. We all knew this was coming. A shoutout to @princessgeekface for being my editor through this process. You are wonderful 💕💕💕

PARING: Arthur Fleck x Oc

WARNING: Violence

Masterlist

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Part 9

Part 10

Part 11

Part 12

Part 13

Part 14

Taglist (I love you all so so much 💕💕):

@jaylovesbats @memory-mortis @gloomyladyy @mijachula @princessgeekface @radio-hoo-ha @lolacolaempath

"I'm not sure my wife would like that. Maybe my next wife." Murray's voice boomed on the stage.

Roaring of laughter came from the audience.

"You should see our next guest coming up. I'm pretty sure this guy could use a doctor." Murray commented.

"Oh? Does he have sexual problems?" Dr. Sally asked.

"I think he's got a lot of problems. Let's show that clip one last time." Murray said.

Arthur's clip played.

The audience ate it up, listening to Arthur's laughter in the clip.

Sandy rolled her eyes, looking over at Arthur, who was staring intently at the curtains.

Sandy stood back from the curtains, carefully watching Arthur's movements. The tech guys next to Arthur looked uncomfortable, and tried shuffling away.

"You might've seen that clip of our next guest. Now, before he comes out, I just wanted to say that we're all heartbroken about what's going on in the city tonight, but this is how he wanted to come out. I honestly believe we could all use a good laugh. So, please welcome Joker."

As the jazz band started, the curtains fell back, revealing Arthur. Arthur came onstage, dancing and twirling around.

Sandy watched from backstage. She looked over by the curtain, seeing Arthur's still lit cigarette. Sandy picked it up, taking a small puff, before distinguishing it.

Arthur shook Murray's hand, then headed over to Dr. Sally, who was just expecting a hug. He cupped Dr. Sally cheeks and kissed her passionately.

Sandy rolled her eyes, crossing her arms backstage.

Whistles and ahhs came from the audience.

Dr. Sally had a very shocked look on her face, as she sat back down.

"That was quite the entrance." Murray commented.

Arthur looked around at the scenery of it all.

Murray looked at Arthur, raising a comedic eyebrow. "You ok?"

"Yeah, this is exactly how I imagined it." Arthur replied.

"Well, that makes one of us." Murray joked.

Laughter and applause came from the audience.

Sandy continued watching from a small television backstage.

"So, could you tell us about this look? You said when we spoke earlier that this wasn't a political statement." Murray said, pointing out his makeup.

"That's right, Murray. I'm not political. I'm just trying to make people laugh." Arthur looked over to the audience, not one of them chuckling.

Sandy cracked a smile backstage.

"And how's that going for you?" Murray commented, again.

The audience once again roared with laughter.

Sandy's cracked smile turned into an angry frown.

Arthur mocked the audience's laughter with his own demented cackle.

"Tell us about your lady friend backstage. She's also dressed as apart of your act. Do you two got a thing going on?" Murray asked.

Sandy paused. Her eyebrows furrowed at the TV. She crossed her arms

Arthur smirked. "It's a little more than 'a thing'. She's my sweetheart. My dear, Sandy."

Awws and oohs came from the audience.

Murray laughed. "Ha. I've heard that one before."

The audience howled with laughter.

Sandy glared hard at the television. She wasn't laughing one bit. All of Murray's jokes were stale and just blatantly mean to Arthur.

"So you tell us you're a comedian. Got any new material? Wanna tell us a joke?" Murray asked, not sounding too pleasant.

The audience applauded.

"Yeah? Okay." Arthur took out his joke book.

"He's gotta book full of jokes." Murray commented.

Arthur flipped a few pages into his notebook.

Arthur paused for a second.

"Take your time. You got all night." Murray laughed.

"Okay, okay. Here's one, knock knock." Arthur said.

"And you had to look that up." Murray commented.

The audience laughed.

Sandy couldn't take the stress. She bit her thumb. She wanted to bash Murray's skull in, see if he was still joking about that.

"I wanna get it right." Arthur's voice was somber.

Sandy couldn't look. She turned her head away from the television.

"Knock, knock." Arthur repeated.

"Who's there?" Murray replied.

"It's the police, ma'am. Your son's been hit by a drunk driver. He's dead." Arthur chuckled.

A loud groan came from the audience.

Sandy laughed at Arthur's edgy joke. Two of the tech guys stared strangely at her. She smiled, watching the television.

"No, no, no. We do not joke about that." Dr. Sally scolded.

"Yeah, that's not funny, Arthur." Murray said.

Arthur chuckled, looking down. "Yeah, I'm sorry. It's just been a rough few weeks. Ever since I..."

Arthur trailed off. His eyes wandered over the audience.

"Ever since I killed those three wallstreet guys." Arthur said, quietly.

Murray looked around at the audience. "Okay, I'm waiting for the the punchline."

"There is no punchline. It's not a joke." Arthur's voice was monotonous. His eyes swelled up with sadness.

A loud gasp washed over the audience.

Sandy closed her eyes, taking a deep sigh. She couldn't help, but feel remorse in this moment. Remorse for Arthur. The tech guys stared at the TV in shock.

Murray gave Arthur a disgusted glare. "You're serious, aren't you? You're telling us you killed those three young men on the subway?"

"Mmhmm." Arthur mumbled.

Murray raised his eyebrow. "And why should we believe you?"

Arthur smirked, shrugging. "Got nothing left to lose. Nothing can hurt me anymore."

Arthur paused for a moment, before chuckling. "My life is nothing but a comedy."

Loud booes came from the audience.

Sandy smirked.

Murray shook his head. "So let me get this straight. You think killing those guys is funny?"

Arthur smacked his lips. "I do, and I'm tired of pretending it's not. Comedy is subjective, Murray. Isn't that what they say? All of you, the system that knows so much. You decide what's right or wrong. The same way you what's funny or not."

More booes and groans came from the audience.

Murray stuttered. "I think I might understand that you did this to start a movement, to become a symbol."

Arthur rolled his eyes. "Come on, MurRay. Do I look like the kind of clown that could start a movement? I killed those guys because they were awful. Everybody is awful these days. It's enough to make anyone crazy."

Murray leaned back in his chair. "So, that's it you're crazy? That's your defense for killing three young men."

Arthur smirked, widely. "No. They couldn't carry a tomb to save their lives."

Sandy laughed loudly from backstage. The two tech guys were glued to the screen, cautious of the lady in front of them.

Arthur smiled, hearing Sandy's laughter from backstage.

More booes and groans followed the audience.

Arthur dramatically rolled his eyes. "Oh, why are people so upset about these guys? If it was me dying on the sidewalk, you'd walk all over me. I PASS you every day, and you DON'T notice me. Oh, but these guys, because Thomas Wayne went and cried about them on TV."

Sandy could hear the pain and tension in his voice. Arthur was at his breaking point. Seeing him like this broke Sandy's heart. A black tear ran down her face. She cracked a smile, holding it all together.

Murray continued pushing his questions. "So, you've got a problem with Thomas Wayne?"

Arthur nodded his head, vigorously. "Yes, I do."

Arthur turned his head towards Murray.

"Have you seen what it's like out there, MurRay? Do you ever actually leave the studio? Everybody just yells and screams at each other. Nobody's civil ANYMORE! Nobody THINKS what it's like to be the other guy. You think men like Thomas Wayne ever think about what it's like to be someone like me. To be somebody, but themselves. They DON'T. They think we'll just sit there and take it like GOOD LITTLE BOYS and we won't WEREWOLF and go WILD."

Sandy's eyes widened, as she covered her mouth to silent her laughing sobs. She never seen this much pain coming from just one man. The techs seemed to get invested with Arthur's big speech.

Murray his head. "Are you finished? There's so much self pity, Arthur. It's almost like you're making excuses for killing those three men. What about your sweetheart, huh, Sandy? She's not awful, right? Not everyone, and I'll tell you this, not everyone is awful."

Arthur glared at Murray. "You're awful, Murray."

"Me? I'm awful? How am I awful?" Murray said, defensively.

Arthur's green ocean eyes glared menacingly at Murray. "Playing my video. Inviting me on the show. You just wanted to make fun of me. You're just like the rest of them."

Murray scoffed. "You don't know the first thing about me, pal. Look what happened because of what you did. What it led to. Two officers are in critical condition because of what you did."

Arthur started laughing with a gentle tear rolling down his face.

"And you're laughing. You're laughing. Someone was killed today because of what you did."

Arthur kept nodding and smiling. "I know. How about another joke, MurRay."

Murray shook his head. "No, I think we've had enough of your jokes."

"What do you get when you cross a mentally ill loner with a SOCIETY that ABANDONS him and treats him like TRASH? I'll tell you what you get. YOU GET WHAT YOU FUCKING DESERVE."

Arthur pulled out the gun, shooting Murray in the head.

The audience ran screaming in terror.

Arthur laughed to himself. Getting up, he shot Murray a second time in the chest

Sandy and the techs witnessed the horror firsthand. Sandy ran out onto the stage.

"Arthur." Sandy screamed.

Arthur walked up to the camera.

"Goodnight, and always remember. That's life."

Arthur was promptly tackled by security.

[starlightbisexual]

Hullo!!! Shy anon here, you're one of my favorite blogs so i was wondering if you happen to have any marvel fic recs? I'm running low and it's summer, so any fic would be appreciated (as long as it's not explicit). Any suggestions? ^^

hi love, you're so sweet thank you!! 

i have about a million fics to rec so this might be a bit long and im gonna put it under the cut. personal faves are marked with an !!!

(when you say “not explicit” i took that to mean they’re not tagged as explicit on ao3. i cant promise that none of these fics contain sex/other mature themes. it’s probably best to always read the tags on each fic just to make sure!)

ofc this list isn’t exhaustive, just the first ones that popped into my head! if you or anyone else wants some more please come ask, i love discussing fics!

those on mobile: note the read more

slide to answer (mature, 6k)

“What do I do?” Steve appealed into the phone. “I’m freaking out.”

There was silence on the other end of the line. It lasted so long that Steve pulled the receiver away from his ear and frowned at it. Pay phones were old. Maybe this one wasn’t working despite the obvious dial tone when he picked up.

“Ok,” a stranger’s voice said over the phone. “First acknowledge the fact that you dialed the wrong number, but be quick about it because my cab is a few blocks away from my own plans and I’m about to drop some truth bombs on you.”

lonely houses off the road (teen, 17k)

Barnes is now glaring at him for some reason. It’s somewhat terrifying but also, oddly, a little reassuring— because that’s emotion right there, which means there’s still somebody behind those eyes. Somebody who seems to think Sam is being a bit slow on the uptake. “Time parameters exceeded. Mission failed.”

“Wait.” Sam narrows his eyes. “Is this some kind of… report? Debriefing?”

“Mission report,” confirms Barnes, looking pleased. Well, looking slightly less murderous than before.

In which various people deal with things they never signed up for, but at the end of the day no one’s particularly surprised.

i love you like rlb (teen, 3k)

I love you like rlb has become a well-known, accepted and valuable component of American vernacular. The meaning of the letters ‘rlb’ is unknown, but is uniformly considered to be a statement of a great romantic love, commitment and sacrifice.

It was Dernier as first said it. Steve never imagined that something like that could have survived the war and all the years in between.

In which Tony goes insane trying to figure out why that phrase affects the Cap so much, Bucky teases the press, and Steve and Bucky love each other like rlb.

i was found and now i don’t roam these streets (mature, 15k)

They’ve decided to start producing Bucky Bears again, now that he’s all shiny and redeemed and fighting for good on this big Avengers misfits team. “He has a little shiny gray arm,” Bucky says, wiggling the stuffed arm in question, one of the tweaks made in the new model. It takes Steve a second to realize that Bucky’s got a small smile on his face, actually looks a little bit proud around the eyes.

Or, Bucky relearns himself and how to be on a team, the rest of the Avengers try to get answers, and everyone watches too much Criminal Minds.

roll on (mature, 89k)

In 1938, there’s a bar in Brooklyn called Sully’s where people are safe to be themselves. Behind the bar, a girl pours drinks. She’s always got a big smile for Steve and she says queer like it’s a good thing. On a regular basis, she takes his shoulders in her hands and tries to shake sense into him, saying, “When will you do something about that best friend of yours?”

In 2012, Bucky’s gone, but Steve’s not, and the girl’s hands are too old to shake him. She does her best to make him see sense anyway.

Steve had people who loved him before the war, and it turns out a few of them are still around when he finally comes home.

one cloud feels lonely (mature, 72k, !!!)

“I’m going to take a break for a while,” Steve said quietly, not looking at T’Challa, not knowing that this was what he was gonna do until the words were out of his mouth. “I can’t be on a team right now.”

T’Challa nodded as if he understood. “Alright.”

AKAIn which Steve and Bucky both figure out how to be a person again, and it still takes them over 130 years.

barnes & rogers and the goddamn truth (not rated, 18k, !!!)

There are three well-known facts at Shield High:

1. The history teacher Mr. Barnes is a stone-cold terror, and it’s not even because he only has one arm.2. The other history teacher, Mr. Rogers, is a mysterious enigma, and it’s something to do with the body of a Greek God and contradicting stories of his past. (They’re all rumours, anyway.)3. Mr Barnes and Mr Rogers hate each other.

Bucky wouldn’t have it any other way.

asked and answered (teen, 5k)

“You should marry me, Bucky.”

“What?”

“You should marry me.” Steve said again. “Sister Eustace said that marriage is the purest form of love, and I love you more than anybody. So we should get married.”

Steve and Bucky. Five marriage proposals (and one time they didn’t have to ask).

1917 (mature, 15k, !!!)

Born on March 10th, 1985 at the Brooklyn Hospital Center, James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes was named after Sergeant Barnes, Captain America’s childhood best friend, who died when he fell off a train in the Swiss Alps.

In 2008, Peggy Carter donates to the Smithsonian letters Captain Rogers wrote to Sergeant Barnes in 1944—

After he fell.

Some lives are eternally entwined.

to be vunerable is needed most of all (mature, 118k)

Steve is a shy comic book artist and meets his new neighbour, Bucky Barnes.

In which there are awkward longings, meddling best friends, comic conventions, heartache, lemons, video games, dorkiness, dancing and two cute boys.

there should be stars (teen, 45k)

“All memories to tell you the truth aren’t good.But sometimes there were good times.Love was good. I loved your crooked sleepbeside me and never dreamed afraid.

There should be stars for great warslike ours. There ought to be awardsand plenty of champagne for the survivors.”- Sandra Cisneros

Or, it takes them decades.

fever dream (mature, 9k)

“Buck.” Steve says, soft as he can, so he won’t start to cough again. The light from the stove hits his face just right, makes his eyes light up bright, spring sky blue. Bucky’s head aches just looking at him.

1942, in fits and starts.

they say love is a virtue (mature, 22k)

“I have a bet,” Tony announces to the room. He stands up, repeating himself a few times so that everyone is forced to stop the game and look up at him. He looks straight into Bucky’s eyes when he goes, “I bet you fifty dollars that you and Steve can’t spend a whole week pretend married without realizing that you’re both in love with each other.”

the smithsonian guard (gen, 8k)

Bucky makes a friend.

cross this river to the other side (teen, 14k)

Here is the truth about Captain America and the Howling Commandos that every World War II historian must come to accept at one point or another: we will never know everything. We won’t even come close.

So much was lost with the untimely death of Captain America. While the man beneath the uniform sunk to the bottom of the North Atlantic, the myth lived on, only to grow bigger and more unwieldy as the years went by. Now, it is near impossible to tell fact from fiction, to separate out truth from propaganda.

In 1943, the Howling Commandos wrote goodbye letters to be given to their loved ones in the event of their deaths.

In 2014, Sharon Carter finds those letters in a tin can in an abandoned HYDRA base.

captain fantastic and the pineapple king (teen, 30k, !!!)

Shit.She hadn’t noticed him yet. Maybe he could turn and leave without them noticing – Sam would understand. Sam was the most empathetic person he knew. He wouldn’t scold Steve for coming home spice-less to avoid an awkward encounter with an ex. Surely.They drew closer.Fuck.Please don’t notice me, please don’t notice me, please don’t notice me…"Steve?”Fuck.In which Steve is saved from his ex in a grocery store, Bucky Barnes is Way Too Chill about absolutely everything, and Sam has had enough of all of these goddamn pineapples in his fucking house.Or: The five times Steve received a pineapple (and one Piña Colada) and the one time he didn’t

haha, jk (teen, 13k)

(A tale of Not Unrequited Love)

Steve: I love you.Bucky: oh no.(and other fallacies)

Bucky learns to never say never when it comes to the effect his best friend can have.

apes debemus imitari (we should imitate the bees) (gen, 15k)

Steve operates a fruit & veg stand at a farmer’s market. Bucky keeps bees and has started up a honey shop just opposite. They’re failing to get along. Steve gets along a lot better with the anonymous friend he’s been writing letters to. In fact, he’s rapidly falling for him.

it’s no coincidence (teen, 109k)

The kids immediately scream, “Trick-or-Treat” before they see who opens the door.

The strange resident looks between the two kids, then at the adults, and his eyes widen in horror.

“It’s October already?”

Okay, Bucky thinks. This guy is probably high.

don’t ask (mature, 21k, !!!)

Captain America and Bucky Barnes were like brothers. Everyone knew that.

most ardently (teen, 9k)

Baron Grant, nothing more than a small, sickly country gentleman with no fortune and very little to recommend him, has just poured a glass of claret over Duke Barnes, a wealthy lord with the world at his feet.