#i hope that a bus comes over and runs over my legs

[thecapricunt1616]

Orchid - (c.b. one-shot)

𝓑𝓵𝓾𝓻𝓫 (𝓜𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓑𝓣𝓒): “How many girlfriends did you have when you were gone?” You asked. His fingers stopped momentarily, before continuing “What is considered a girlfriend?” He asked, causing you to giggle and shake your head a bit in amusement. Carmy, ever the emotionally unintelligent.  “A girl, who you really like, that you hang out with a lot and go on dates with and like…have sex with” you said the last part a tad shy. You felt his chest rumble in a chuckle behind you and your head snaps to the side to look at him “why are you laughing!?” You asked and he shrugged a bit, twirling the ends of your curls around his fingers  “None- but I did have a few one night stands when it came about. Why? We havin’ a competition?” He teased. You felt your cheeks get hot and you shook your head, laughing a bit  “I’d lose every time. I’ve never done anything. Well- we kiss. Like- now. But I’ve only been on a few dates but like…the other night on your couch you’re the only person I’ve done that kissing with.. that’s the most intense thing I’ve done like - ever - my…y’know was like really…” you blushed  Really, really fucking wet.  Carmen’s heart begins to race in his chest oh. Oh-  You’d meant earlier in the week, after 2 glasses of wine, you told Carmen he was ‘pretty when he smokes even though you hate it cause it’s bad for his lungs’ and that ended up in a kiss that turned sloppy, then it turned in to two kisses, then three- then it ended up being an entire make out session where you were pathetically squirming and rubbing your thighs together to get some kind of friction.  He vividly remembered it, he didn’t know you were a fucking virgin. Fuck. This information was going to ruin him.  “So you- you’ve never made out with someone and fuckin’ humped their leg like that before?” He teased boldly, causing you to gasp and hit his bicep playfully.  “Carmy! Humped your leg?! What am I- a dog?” You laughed and he wrapped his strong arm around your waist, easily pinning you to the couch and holding your arms veheath you with little effort and one arm.  “Mm-‘mmm- like a cat in heat, you’re like a little horny kitten” he said huskily in your ear and chuckled when you squirmed finally letting go and you sat up, flustered and incredibly turned on, but still too stubborn to let him know he had such control over you.  “Stop it. Not fair you have all these girls running you down. Do French girls really walk around topless?” You asked and he laughed shaking his head  “I’d have stayed in France if I got to look out my window and see tits all day. No they do not, but the nude beach thing is real. I just didn’t go because you kinda have to participate” he chuckles and you laughed imagining him trying to hide a boner at a beach.  “So your one night stands…what is it like? Sex?”  He was going to go fucking insane.

♡ 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐨: In the spiritual world, orchids can symbolize the search for truth, the ability to appreciate life's beauty, and the courage to be different. They can also evoke a sense of tranquility and inner peace, and In Irish culture, orchids can symbolize beauty, luxury, honor, dignity, and spiritual grace. ♡ 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: Carmy is your childhood best friend, after he comes home & opens 'The Bear' you both realize you may have been hiding mutual feelings for eachother. ♡ 𝐖/𝐂: 10.1k+ (of mostly smut) ♡ 𝐀/𝐍: Hello all! Firstly this is DC to my AMAZING, SMART, WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL FRIEND @carmenberzattosgf ohhh Olive, this is the first time i'm writing you one of my proper novellas & I hope it is a lovely treat after all of your hard work after your test! This is a slight Self Insert for miss Olive, but can still be read as an x reader fic! I truly am proud of this smut & hope you love it Olive!!! 'olive'you to the moon and to saturn hehehe xoxoxo - Capri ♡ 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐁𝐓𝐂:SMUT SMUT AND MORE SMUT, Childhood best friend trope, no use of y/n, r is called pet names like kitten, bunny, squish, size kink, squirting, overstim, dom!carmy, unprotected sex, p in v sex, AFAB reader, virgin!reader, corruption kink Carmy, aftercare, not edited (we die like bears. Pretend it’s perfect, ok?!)

♡ 𝐌𝐲 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 ♡ ➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡ ➵ 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞-𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞 ♡ ➵ 𝘊𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 / 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘵 ♡ ➵ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 ♡

You and Carmy had known each other for quite a few years. You were one grade below him, and in middle school, you became close. Every student was forced to join a club for some stupid reason, and you chose ‘reading club’.

To be expected, When you walked in, it was just a room where kids sat for an hour every Monday, Wednesday, and  Friday last period and read books silently. Carmy was sat in the back corner desk reading a Deadpool Vol. 2 comic book, so you plopped in the desk next to him and took out out a The Walking Dead comic. 

He looked a bit surprised, at first, but after 2 weeks of this he cleared his throat and nodded towards your comic

“Those uh…those any good?” He asked. His voice was soft, a bit higher than other guys in his grade. Your friendship blossomed from there, and all the way through high school. 

After he graduated, though, and left you for your senior year- he ended up drifting apart from you. You weren’t sure if it was because you were busy with school during the day or what- but he stopped calling as often. 

After Mikey died, though, and he came back to Chicago - naturally he leaned on you once again for support since you were one of his closest friends growing up. So over the past year, you two had once again became two peas in a pod. 

You helped with the restaurant renovations when he needed, also made sure to be a shoulder to cry on for him. He appreciated you more than you knew, and was surprised when he came back after all of this time and you were even more beautiful then when he left - if that was even possible at all. He had a crush on you when you were younger, but had so much anxiety that he thought he’d be labeled a perv or a weirdo if he was known to date a girl younger than him. 

Today you were sat on his couch, watching some cheesy Halloween Disney movie that you had insisted on watching because you couldn’t stand horror movies yet ‘still wanted to feel the fall spirit bear!’ To which he groaned and said it was still only the end of August. 

You were comfortably sat between his legs on his old couch you’d asked a million times why he hadn’t gotten rid of as he carefully thread his fingers through your hair. Suddenly, a question started bouncing around your mind that you realized you’d never asked the question to. 

You hadn’t really asked Carmy much about his time away from Chicago, you’d figured that if he was so desperate to leave home and didn’t even tell you there had to be a reason why, so even touching the topic seemed strange feeling to you. But you asked anyways

“How many girlfriends did you have when you were gone?” You asked. His fingers stopped momentarily, before continuing

“What is considered a girlfriend?” He asked, causing you to giggle and shake your head a bit in amusement. Carmy, ever the emotionally unintelligent. 

“A girl, who you really like, that you hang out with a lot and go on dates with and like…have sex with” you said the last part a tad shy. You felt his chest rumble in a chuckle behind you and your head snaps to the side to look at him “why are you laughing!?” You asked and he shrugged a bit, twirling the ends of your curls around his fingers 

“None- but I did have a few one night stands when it came about. Why? We havin’ a competition?” He teased. You felt your cheeks get hot and you shook your head, laughing a bit 

“I’d lose every time. I’ve never done anything. Well- we kiss. Like- now. But I’ve only been on a few dates but like…the other night on your couch you’re the only person I’ve done that kissing with.. that’s the most intense thing I’ve done like - ever - my…y’know was like really…” you blushed 

Really, really fucking wet. 

Carmen’s heart begins to race in his chest oh. Oh- 

You’d meant earlier in the week, after 2 glasses of wine, you told Carmen he was ‘pretty when he smokes even though you hate it cause it’s bad for his lungs’ and that ended up in a kiss that turned sloppy, then it turned in to two kisses, then three- then it ended up being an entire make out session where you were pathetically squirming and rubbing your thighs together to get some kind of friction. 

He vividly remembered it, he didn’t know you were a fucking virgin. Fuck. This information was going to ruin him. 

“So you- you’ve never made out with someone and fuckin’ humped their leg like that before?” He teased boldly, causing you to gasp and hit his bicep playfully. 

“Carmy! Humped your leg?! What am I- a dog?” You laughed and he wrapped his strong arm around your waist, easily pinning you to the couch and holding your arms veheath you with little effort and one arm. 

“Mm-‘mmm- like a cat in heat, you’re like a little horny kitten” he said huskily in your ear and chuckled when you squirmed finally letting go and you sat up, flustered and incredibly turned on, but still too stubborn to let him know he had such control over you. 

“Stop it. Not fair you have all these girls running you down. Do French girls really walk around topless?” You asked and he laughed shaking his head 

“I’d have stayed in France if I got to look out my window and see tits all day. No they do not, but the nude beach thing is real. I just didn’t go because you kinda have to participate” he chuckles and you laughed imagining him trying to hide a boner at a beach. 

“So your one night stands…what is it like? Sex?” 

He was going to go fucking insane. 

“Uhhh-“ he feels blood rushing to his cock and casually rested his hand over his lap to conceal it “like- well f’me it’s different. But girls…well. Good- a lot of the girls I’ve been with say it feels good because it feels…complete. Like, full, like that’s how they wanna feel all the time. Which I mean when I’m fucking their pussy I could probably say the same but I guess that’s the best way to explain it. Full” he shrugged a bit, grabbing the throw pillow now and resting it over his lap as his explanation had his mind racing with each and every thing he wanted to show you. 

“Full” you repeated. Maybe that’s what you were missing. You had tried sticking your fingers inside once or twice but it never felt good, so you didn’t understand why other people would say it felt so good. The only thing that you found good oh, so good. Was rubbing your clit. 

Thinking about it being carmys hands other then your own made you get to this point where your toes would curl and legs would shake, it felt like fireworks. It always ended with your hips and said little twitching. Sometimes you realized if you went for too long, it would pulse. 

“Ye’ - have you ever tried anything yourself?” He asked, swallowing thickly after the question. He couldn’t lie, the only thing saving his dignity was the small throw pillow he had basically glued to his crotch with his hand. His cock was suffocating, painfully hard and throbbing against the confines of his vintage Levi jeans. 

“Oh yeah- yeah. It just… it’s never good I dunno maybe I don’t know how to do it right or something” you said, oblivious to the fact of what him holding that pillow even meant.  “Why don’t I show you so you can make yourself feel good, mmm? It’s a good thing to know, I’ll help you out ,  wouldn’t want you missin’ out, princess”

That’s how tonight started. Now, you were on your back on Carmy’s bed, completely bare, he was fucking coaching you on how to touch yourself. “So- show me how you start” he was sat in front of you, full view of your pussy. Your cheeks hadn’t ever felt hotter, but your mind was buzzing with excitement none the less. 

“Uh- like, well, whenever I try to put in a finger or something it hurts, so I just…” you spread your thighs wider, putting a bit of spit on your fingers before beginning to rub at your clit in slow, gentle circles. You took a deep breath at the pleasure it brought, meanwhile Carmy was watching your every move with a lustful gaze. His usually icy blue eyes were currently the blue of the midnight sky, lit with the dancing northern lights of being the first person to see you, to get the potential to deflower you. 

“How’s it feel?” he questioned. His voice was husky but soft, laced with honeyed desire. If he was any less than strictly disciplined, the sight of his childhood crush laying in front of him, spread out like something from a high school dream of his, touching herself - the prospect that she’d waited for him - he’d be mounting you like a fucking dog - but, the gentleman he was, he just watched, clutching the blankets at his sides to stop his trembling anticipatory hands.

“It- uh” you giggle nervously, “good - I um… I feel myself getting really wet I don’t wanna ruin your sheets did you wanna grab like…a towel-”

“No- no. That's fine, that's- that’s the fun of it. I love that, make a mess please make a mess, sweetheart. That's how I know you’re feeling good” he explained quickly. You swallowed thickly and nod, still feeling a bit weary on just allowing yourself to make a mess of his sheets, but if he really didn’t mind…

On the other hand Carmy literally had to squeeze his cock through the confines of his jeans so that he could ease the throb that was happening. As you nodded in agreement to his statement, moving your middle and ring finger around your clit a bit faster, adding a bit more pressure, he nearly groaned as your jaw fell slightly slack, letting out the prettiest little breathy whine he’d ever heard in his life. 

Your back arched in the most sensual way, your eyes fluttering shut and he took the opportunity to get his jeans unbuttoned and unzipped, sighing at the great relief of pressure that was imprisoning his cock and resting back on one hand as he watched you, biting his bottom lip as you reached your other hand up and grabbed at your breast, gently tugging at your nipple and whining gently. 

“And uh-  this- I like this - feels good” your eyes fluttered open as you explained and he nodded quickly, as if he was taking mental notes of every single thing you said and did, and storing it in a file folder of his brain. 

“Yeah? Has anyone ever sucked on y’tits before, princess?” he asked in that soft, low way. He knew the answer to the question, of course he knew the fucking answer - you’d admitted to him that you hadn’t as much as made out with a guy before now, but he loved to hear you say it. He wanted to hear over, and over, and over, that he was the first person to make you feel good, the only person. The way he said it made your core clench around nothing - and now he could see it clear as day. It made the edges of his lips curl into a slight smirk when he noticed, having the urge to lean forward and catch the drip of creamy white arousal that gushed out of your pretty tight hole with his finger and pull it into his mouth, he wondered if he could make you squirt. “N-no- No uh… no one” you admit, please, please offer you begged with your eyes to which thankfully he agreed since he said

“Would you mind if I try, so we see if you like it?” he sat up a bit when you nod, expecting a verbal answer. He continued sitting, and you stared at eachother for a moment until he finally said “One thing that won’t work w’me is not usin’ y’r words, angel” he said in that breathy way that made you shiver, his tone sweet but firm. 

“Please, yes please” you said, voice meek and shy, just above a whisper. You had gotten so lost in his eyes that your hand stopped moving and when he noticed this as he shifted to get comfortable next to you, he said

“You can keep touching yourself, pretty girl” He kissed down your neck with hot, open mouthed kisses, leaving a trail of saliva that gave you a chill as he moved down to your same breast that you were just paying attention to with your fingers, so you move your hand to your other breast. He kissed over the flesh of your breast, looking up at you and gauging your reaction as you continued making quick circles around your clit, the sound of your wetness causing a faint click to be heard throughout the room. 

“If you want me to stop at any point, just say stop - ok? It doesn’t matter why, if you aren’t enjoying something say stop” he told you truthfully. You nodded and smiled a bit, your belly swarming with butterflies at the way he was so focused on making sure you felt safe and heard during your first experience that was so intimate. 

“I’ll be sure” you promised and he continued kissing around your breast until he got to your nipple. He ran his lips over it lightly, teasing the bud with his lips gently before sticking out his tongue and flicking it over the sensitive bud in a way that made you shiver slightly. Once he’d gotten your sensitive bud perky he took it into his mouth, sucking on it lightly and swirling his tongue around it in a way that made you moan out, eyes fluttering shut and head dropping back. 

“Oh- mmhmm- yeah, feels nice” you breathe, causing him to smirk around your flesh, bringing his hand up to your other breast, gently nudging your hand out of the way and taking over. You gasped as he rolled your other nipple between his fingers, a small twinge of pain flicking through you - but mixed with the feeling of his lips and tongue on your breast, and you fingers now quickly working at your clit in tight up and down strokes, your stomach beginning to clench and tighten. Your breathing got quicker, turning into little pants as you got closer and closer to your peak. He removed himself from your nipple with a pop, looking up at you 

“Gettin’ there, huh baby?” he confirmed, he could tell by the way you were whimpering and your thigh was twitching every so often that you were about to fall over. In response you nod quickly, mind fuzzy and eyes still closed. “Lemme show y’somethin” he takes his hand away from your breast, returning his mouth to your other nipple and gently applying pressure to your lower abdomen right below your naval. The pleasure was simply mind numbing, you weren’t sure how just a simple palm under your bellybutton could make you gasp, but here you were. The noises you were making were sinful, whiney, hot, even to your own standards - you didn’t even know you could make noises like this. 

“Tha’s it kitten, such a good girl - make yourself cum” he increases the pressure and you cry out as you’re thrown over the edge, hips jerking and shivering. Your thighs quivered, and he released his palm from your stomach to hold it and rub it gently as you continued working yourself through your high. Once he saw you finally take your fingers away from your clit once you began to feel overstimulated he pulls away from your breast once again and takes your hand, looking at the sticky creamy strings dripping down your fingers. 

“Can I clean these up for you angel?” he asked and your mouth dropped a bit at the questioned, your already twitching clit feeling like it leapt. 

“Yes- please do” you said softly. You thought he was going to be so gentlemanly and take his t-shirt off and wipe them for you so you didn’t have to get up and wash your hands since your legs felt like jelly, but what he did was even better. He parted his lips, opening his mouth and taking your fingers all the way to the back of his tongue, before closing his lips around them and sucking them, swirling his tongue around them like he did your nipple and the sensation caused a moan to escape your throat, which in turn he huffed a chuckle through his nose. 

Once your fingers were cum free, he pulled off of them with a similar pop as earlier on your breast and looked at you with a hazy lust filled smile “You did so good, squish” he said and you blushed, the sound of your childhood nickname in such an intimate moment making you feel extra shy. You giggled a bit as he cupped your cheeks with his dry hand before squishing them and pulling you close to give you short sweet pecks all over your face and finally landing on your lips. 

“Thank you - I’ve never finished that fast I think” you said and he smirked, resting his forehead on yours 

“Yeah? Bet I could make you do it again, and faster” he mused softly, his breath fanning your lips and you could smell the taste of yourself on his tongue, causing your heart to flutter in your chest. You hadn’t even tasted that before, let alone anyone else. 

“I’d bet you can’t” you teased, ever egging on the forever running competition between you two. “Especially after I just finished, that’d take forever” you smirk and he snorts a laugh, sitting up a bit. 

“Is that a challenge, squish?” he asked and you shrug, 

“If you think you can handle it, sure” you spread your legs again as he sat up fully and got you situated between his thighs and comfortably sitting against his chest. 

You didn’t know what you were getting yourself into.

“Not only can I handle it, I can do it without touching your clit if you trust me” he said cockily and you look back at him 

“Always trust you bear” you said sweetly. He felt butterflies in his stomach, bending his head down and giving you a long, gentle kiss, the kind of kiss that made the hair on the back of your neck stand up. It felt like the kiss of a summer breeze, sweet and relaxing

“Ok, I know you said that you’ve tried fingering yourself and it didn’t feel good, but I wanna try- Like I said before, just say stop any time, ye’?” he assured and remembering what he said about needing to use your words you nod and added a soft ‘yes’  to confirm your understanding. “Good girl” he purred, kissing your forehead and nudging his thigh under yours, pries your legs a bit further open. 

“So usually you’re gonna wanna do what you just did before you start fingering yourself, kitten - gotta get yourself nice and wet, if you can make yourself cum before you start that’s even better. But you wanna start with just one knuckle, middle finger is best usually” he explained, his lips pressed to the shell of your ear and hot breath tickling your neck as he whispered low and soft. 

“Uh- uh-huh” you said, swallowing thickly as you watched his finger slowly swirl around your hole, collecting creamy white arousal and slowly pulling it away so there would be a string as he held it up to show. 

“See that, all that sweet shit? That’s what you need for it to feel good baby” he rubbed his thumb with his middle finger, spreading them apart to show you the sticky stringy mess when he had barely touched you yet. “You’ve tasted yourself, right angel?” he nipped at your earlobe gently, pulling it with his teeth and you whimper softly. 

“No- I- I haven’t” you admitted, breath hitching when he tuts, disappointed, 

“You have to, you have the sweetest pussy I’ve ever tasted, squish, go ahead- s’like fuckin candy” he swipes his middle and forefinger over your hole all the way up to your sensitive clit, making your hips twitch a bit as he collected the fingerfull of white cream and brought it up to your lips. You opened without a second thought, and he thrusts his fingers in your mouth in such a way that made you groan a bit at the heavy feeling of his fingers on your tongue. He was right, you did taste sweet. Heady, but wonderful. He hummed as your eyes fluttered shut and you enjoyed the taste. 

“See? Thank you for letting me be the first person to taste you babygirl” he kissed your temple as he gently eased his tattooed fingers out of your mouth after you licked them clean. The statement leaving his lips made his cock twitch, fuck, no one had ever had such a effect on him before, as if there was fireworks popping in his veins. 

You looked up at him, leaning up and connecting your lips in another one of those kisses that made your heart skip a beat or two. He gently squeezed at the plush of your thigh, his nails creating light half moon shaped indents in the flesh which caused a sweet whimper to leave your throat “Carmy please touch me” you begged, before trying to bring your lips back to his and he inched his face away teasingly. 

“Use your words, pretty girl” he purred, gently grazing his teeth over your jaw and nipping gently. You arched your hips, trying to get him to rub at your clit again, kissing his lips with a passionate open mouthed kiss and taking his hand, putting it over your heat and grinding over his fingers, huffing a breath of relief when you felt his strong fingers brushing over your clit. He huffed a chuckle into your lips, dipping his fingers down and swirling the tip of his middle finger over your entrance after spreading you out with his fingers, gently prodding just the tip of it in. You bit down on his lip gently, pulling away and letting it snap back into place. 

“I wanna try that with you…maybe it’ll feel better when someone else does it” you admit shyly, hand moving to cover your breast when you realized that it was still just you sprawled out and naked on his bed, he had only unbuttoned his jeans at this point. “An’ I want you to take this off” you said just above a whisper, voice honeyed with innocence as you tugged at the hem of his shirt. 

“M’sorry baby I didn’t mean to strip you down an’not join you, I just had t’get a fuckin’ taste been wantin’it f’so long” he admitted, sitting up and pulling his shirt off with one tug, his curls becoming even more ruffled in the process before settling back against the headboard, your back now warmed by the feeling of his chest pressed against it. He pulled your thigh open again wider this time, and went back to rubbing your clit in gentle, slow circles that had your head dropping back on his shoulder. 

“Like we said you tell me if s’too much yea?” he said gently in your ear before kissing the base of your neck and you hum, muttering a yes, that turned into a gasp as he picked up the speed of his fingers.

“Yes- god- please, yes Carmy” you weren’t sure what exactly you were begging for, but knew if it was anything like up to this point- 

You were going to enjoy yourself just fine.

You felt so hot, You had lost track of how many times Carmy had made you cum on his fingers at this point, your brain had turned to mush after number 5 and you just became a pathetic moaning mess beneath him only knowing ‘yes’ and ‘no’. The sheets beneath you felt soaked with your arousal, and you could barely keep your eyes open. You felt another one coming as your thighs had began to shake and you were squirming in Carmys lap as he held your thighs open with his knees hooked over yours to keep them from closing. 

“Awww y’gonna cum f’me again bunny? Mmm? You sound so fuckin’ pretty when you cum, beggin’ me to keep goin- fucked you stupid and you havent even had my cock yet” he edged you on in that soft husky voice you loved right in the shell of your ear. Your jaw had come slack, and hips rutted up beyond your control to meet his fingers and draw them deeper - how he’d stretched you open to accommodate 3 was still baffling to you 

“Yes- yesyesyesyesyes” you babbled, feeling him chuckle at your eagerness. He had never been so fucking hard in his life, but being the disciplined partner in the bedroom he was, he wanted to be sure that you were essentially in tears begging for his cock by the time he gave it to you and he was well on his way there. 

“Yeah? Yeah you wanna cum angel? What if I do this, mmm? On that spot we found” he purrs in  your ear, finding that spot that made you nearly stop breathing and stars of white to form behind your lids and continued to pump his fingers in that come hither motion you knew would get you to your peak faster, but what you didn’t know was he was going to rub the pad of his palm right over your clit that was aching for attention in such a way you felt a pit at the base of your stomach so white hot with pleasure that all you could do was quickly look down to see what on earth could feel so good just as a gush of creamy white covers his fingers and drips down his wrist, going as far as to drop to the crook of his arm and the most mind-melting orgasm washed over you after that. 

He worked you through it, of course, purring filthy praises in your ear about creaming so pretty on his fingers, and how the noises you made were something close to angelic. He kissed over the side of your face, down to your jaw, and neck, nibbling over the little marks that he’d left on your collarbones as he slowed down the thrusting of his fingers. 

“Let’s see what kinda mess you made, babygirl” he eased his fingers out, the empty feeling causing you to whine a bit that he caught quickly in a kiss, sucking on your already plump and kiss-bitten bottom lip, by the time he pulled away to look your mind was hazy and kiss drunk. “Wow” he mutters, utterly amazed with your release, holding up his sticky right hand and spreading his fingers apart to demonstrate the sweet stringy white cream covering his digits.

“You want some baby?” he sucked the tips of his fingers sensually, moaning hotly at the taste, enjoying it so much that his lust blown blue eyes fluttered shut for a moment. You took his hand, taking his fingers and opening wide, sucking them clean. You hum softly at the satly sweet taste, definitely different then just your slick from earlier. 

“Good girl- always so good f’me mm?” he braised, cupping your cheek with his other hand and you didnt take your eyes off him as you began to slowly bob your head back and forth, causing his jaw to fall slack watching as your eyes got friskier, he knew you knew what you were doing. “Are you a good girl?” he mocked “That isn’t good girl behavior” he teased, causing you to pull off his fingers with a satisfying pop, licking your lips of the additional release that coated them.

“What if I said no, would I be in trouble” you muse, a frisky smile dancing on your lips. You giggled how you did when he knew you were up to something. 

“Ohhh do you want to be punished?” He grabs your face, “open up this filthy fuckin mouth mm?” He said and you stuck your tongue out teasingly. “Noooo, I said open” he tapped your cheek lightly and you relented, opening your mouth for him and sticking your tongue out wide just to tease. 

“Aaahhh” you said teasingly until you heard and felt him spit a hot glob of saliva into your mouth that tasted like your arousal coating your tongue. You opened your eyes to see him smirking down at you cockily. 

“Now swallow since you wanna act like such a little slut mmm?” He pushed your jaw closed and you swallow right away, looking up at him stunned but impossibly turned on, not quite sure how to even respond as you never thought it was an option. 

“Can you do it again please” you open your mouth and rest your head back. He chuckled, shaking his head a bit as he collected a generous glob in the front of his mouth before connecting his lips to yours, letting it fall over your tongue and you moan softly drinking it down like a magical elixir while you kiss over his lips. He pulled away just enough to speak 

“Already turned you into a little fuckin’ whore f’me, mm?” He strokes your cheek gently with his now dry but slightly sticky hand from your cum and you turned your face to the side, capturing your lips around his thumb and sucking lightly as you look into his eyes, bobbing your head slowly and his breath hitched a bit. 

“Have you ever sucked cock?” He asked, his voice soft and husky. You get your cheeks heat at the bluntness of the question. 

“N-no,” you managed, your voice sheepish. 

“Y’wanna try, you can say no, of course, but you seem to have…” he pried your mouth open with his thumb again, brushing the pad of it over your tongue and as if it was a routine you closed your lips around it and swirled your tongue, bobbing your head slightly and he squished your cheeks with his hand “an oral fixation. So let’s put it to better use then cleanin’ the cum offa’ my fingers, mm?” He said in such a way that made a shiver go down your spine. 

“Yea- I might not be good-“ you start to apologize and he put his finger to your lips, stopping you 

“I can teach you.” He promised and you nodded gently, holding onto his forearm and gently taking the finger into your mouth all the way to the base and humming softly when you felt him pressing on the back of your tongue more, and more until you gagged and coughed into his hand. “Good girl, first thing is you need some spit” he pushed his boxers and jeans down enough to free his throbbingly hard cock, it coming up and slapping his stomach with a small fleshy sound that made your mouth water as you looked at it. 

Veiny, thick, adorned with a little bush of dark curls at the base, balls that looked like the perfect handful- he was prettier then you’d though. “You’ve seen a dick before, right?” He teased as he grabbed it, twisting his wrist as he covered it with the slick and tightening his jaw a bit as he got used to the sensation. 

Carmen was used to being pent up weeks at a time, of not having barely 10 minutes to sit and jack off without the sound of an email coming in and completely killing his boner - when he was quite literally almost there. So he was an expert at edging himself by this point, getting to cum for him was well- a luxury. And he knew if he was gonna cum anywhere tonight, he wanted it to be your pussy obviously or your mouth- or face, depending on the mood but he knew for your first time covering your face in cum and taking a picture of it may be a little nerve wracking, so that was more just a fantasy - but mouth or pussy would please him greatly. 

“Yes- ive seen a dick… not like…in real life. But I’ve seen them In like…I saw porn a few times.” You admit shyly and his cock twitched in the confines of his hand at your admission. 

Shiiiiiiit he thought to himself in his head, resisting the urge to just choke the fuck out of his cock and get this over with, finally get that release that his stomach was starting to hurt for. But he didn’t, he couldn’t. He’d been waiting for so long for this, that the thought of wasting the opportunity instead of having your mouth on his cock and he would rather get back with Claire then miss this opportunity. 

“Yeah- mm tell me what kinda porn did you watch princess-“ he grunted a bit as he continued lightly stroking himself. You decided to take it upon yourself to straddle his thighs, and gently grab his wrist. 

“I’ll tell you, but can I do this part?” You asked. Carmy was convinced he could cum right there so he grabbed the base of his cock, squeezing tight thinking of anything he could to not just bust and have it spurt all the way onto your tits like a loaded fucking gun. 

“Yeah- course baby” he let go of it, guiding your hand to the base and wrapping his hand around yours, stomach muscles tightening when he felt the sheer size and softness of your hand. “Jesus Christ-“ he muttered to himself as he slowly started working your hands up and down his length, his abs contracting with each twist of your wrist over his sensitive tip. “Tell me- was it, fuck was it like this? Er was it rough?” He asked, and you found yourself easing over onto his Jean clad thigh and rubbing your pussy back and forth over the denim to ease the throb that began to build there. You let out a soft wanton moan before responding 

“Uh- mmm- I- I think that uh- it was pretty rough” you admit, grinding yourself a bit harder when he tightens his hand around yours and moves your hands in tandem faster 

“Yeah? Was she screamin’? Did she cream all over his cock like I made you do?” He asked and your cheeks go pink at the reminder, not like the milky creamy stain sitting a few inches to your left didn’t remind you enough of just the mess he can have you making. 

“Uh- hnngg” your thoughts practically melt as you brought yourself closer to the edge moving your hips in tandem with his hand and jaw falling slack 

“Awwww are you makin’ y’self cum on my leg? You’re humping my leg princess mmm?” He cooed, moving his hand slower and watched as you slowed your hips “y’wanna cum on my leg? Mmm?” He asked and you nodded fervently, brain feeling fuzzy and lower stomach wound tight with that need, every pass of his strong thigh covered by roughly starched denim over your twitching sensitive nub causing that coil to wrap tighter, and tighter getting ready to snap at any moment. “Yeah? You wanna cum on my leg- er come on my cock” he asked and your eyes shot open -

not having realized for whatever reason that was definitely an option.

After a quick begging session of telling Carmy it would be okay to not use a condom since you had a birth control insert - it was making it harder and harder for Carmy to maintain his composure with every word passed from your pretty plump lips. 

You were on your back, legs spread impossibly wide- Carmy brought out a flexibility in you you didn’t know existed, even though you guessed you’d likely be sore tomorrow. He grabbed lube from his nightstand, a dark purple bottle that read astroglide : water based lubricant on the side and opened the cap, squirting a decent glob in his hand. 

“S’gonna be cold but it’s ok, everythings gonna get real hot in here in a second” he mused, stroking himself a few times to get himself coated before rubbing the rest over your already dripping hole and clit. He just wanted to be sure. He was right though, the feeling of the icy gel made goosebumps appear on your lower stomach that he began to kiss away as he rubbed at your clit gently 

“Y’need me T’stretch you again just say the word, ok?” He confirmed, lining himself up with your entrance. You nodded reaching out for his hand and he took it in his, lacing your fingers together and kissing it sweetly “nervous, baby?” He asked in that soft sweet way that made your heart melt into a puddle in your chest. 

Well, not anymore you thought. 

“No- i promise ill tell you if it hurts” you assured him. He supported the leg that was curled around his waist with his strong arm, hoisting it up onto his shoulder 

“It’ll feel good this way, trust” he gently nudged his tip in, causing you both to moan out a bit. “Holy fucking shit squish” he grunted out. Just the tip and he was already gritting his teeth to hold it together and not cream pie you before he even thrusted once.  

“Wow- wow” you said breathlessly and when he rubbed your clit your toes curled and spine arched off the bed slightly. “Fuck- yes- oh yes, yesyesyes” you babble as he sinks in deeper. Your eyes were shut in bliss, but his were wide as an owl, taking in your everything. 

Every breath, every moan, every twitch and arch and curve - it was like watching art. “God- so fuckin beautiful” he said as he sunk in another inch, rubbing your clit in tighter circles and he began to feel that tight pulsing he knew meant you were right on the edge he had felt on his fingers so many times tonight, but now that it was around his cock- his mind went blank. Completely fucking blank. He wasn’t sure if he was asked what his name was in that moment he’d have an answer, like every single bit of information he’d ever learned had vanished into an abyss. The only thing he could do was let out a series of whiney moans and grunts that hurled you into an orgasm that has tears pricking in the corners of your eyes. 

“Oh fuck- yessss babygirl cum on my fuckin cock- god- such a good fuckin girl” he praised once he finally found his tongue, using the oppertunity to sink in fully to the hilt and you cry out, grabbing at his arm and gripping it with your nails causing him to grunt “fuck- gonna scratch me up kitten? Mmm? Let everyone at work know I rocked your shit?” He thrust just a bit harder and you dragged your nails down his arm, gasping at the sensation when he threw your other leg on his shoulder and you felt him impossibly deep. 

It was all consuming how full you felt, quite frankly it was addicting. The mushroom shaped tip of his cock was massaging over that incredible spot deep inside you that made you see stars in your vision. You didn’t even notice that he was staring at the bulge showing up in your belly with each deep thrust of his cock. 

“Jesus fuckin hell - look a’this, bunny” he taps your cheek lightly for your attention and rubs his hand over that little bulge and he groans as he can feel the tips of his fingers pressing over his cock as he thrusts up. The sight is incredible, unimaginably hot. You brushed his hand out of the way and gently press, causing you both to moan out in pure ecstasy. 

“Oh- oh fuck fuck” he rambled, sweat dripping down his toned muscle and chain swinging against his glistening chest. You had the bright idea many times before but were never given the golden opportunity (pun intended)  to suck on the little gold pendant no matter how many times it ever so teasingly dangled in front of your face. Since it was now or never, you hook your finger around the necklace and pull him closer and closer until you could pull it into your mouth and he groans hotly as you suck on it, wrapping it around your tongue. 

“I always catch you starin’ at that, y’know that sweetheart?” He smirked down at you, continuing his slow deep strokes and putting his hand back over that little Carmen shaped swell he was leaving just below your naval. You felt your cheeks run hot never realizing that you had made it so obvious the appreciation you had for his chain. What could you say? The man wore it well. 

“S’not my fault you look so good in your white shirts and chains. You drive me crazy” you admit, letting the necklace fall from your lips. He hummed softly at your admission, tilting your face up and capturing your lips in a kiss, cupping your cheek to hold you to his mouth and continue kissing you, quicker, more fervent as he sped up the snapping of his hips causing you to mewl into his mouth, and for his breath to fan out of his nose against your upper lip in hot short pants as he trailed his hands down over your neck, lingering there for a moment which for whatever reason sent fireworks shooting off in your belly, before sliding down and finding the swell of your breasts that were bouncing with each rough snap of his hips. 

The sound throughout the room was the lewd wet slapping of skin, as well as whiney little moans tearing from your throat with each time his hips bounced off the meat of your ass from the intensity of his thrusts. He grabbed your breasts, one in each hand and thrummed over your nipples with the pads of his thumbs, squeezing them in his palms, pushing them together, just utterly enjoying himself kneading the balls of flesh. 

The boyishness of it caused you to pull away so you wouldn’t laugh into his mouth and look down at his large tattooed hands massaging and squishing your breasts. “Havin’ fun, Bear?” You teased and he pinched your nipples playfully causing you to gasp at the mix of pain and pleasure. 

“I am havin’ fun- aren’t you havin’ fun?” He confirmed, letting go of the sensitive buds of flesh so you could find the mind to reply you nod quickly and he cupped your jaw, slowing his thrusts “words” he reminded 

“The most fun I’ve ever fucking had now keep touching my tits” you giggled, taking his palm and bringing it back to your breast and he snorts a laugh. 

“I’ve created a monster, mmm?” He teased, quickening his thrusts again and you nod with a hot mewl as he buries himself to the hilt and grinds his hips in such a way that his cock was rutting against your special spot, in turn causing you to gush around his cock how you did earlier and your legs shake as another one of those intense orgasms washed over you, your eyes nearly rolling back as your lids flutter shut and jaw dropped. There was the roaring of blood in your ears, your back arching off the bed as your jaw fell slack and you let something out between a scream and a cry, “fuuuckfuckfuck Carmy fuckkkk” you cry out, the warmth flooding the sheets below you to the point you could hear the trickle of it. 

“So fuckin hot Jesus Christ you’re so fuckin hot baby- soakin my fuckin cock like this I’m gonna fuckin fill up this pussy” he grunts, his thrusts becoming spurratic and he took his thumb, massaging it over your clit and laying his 4 fingers in such a way he could press in and feel himself fuck you as he did before. 

The pleasure was so mind numbing you felt like jelly, the only thing in your brain currently was how if he kept doing this you were surely going to soak his mattress and have to buy him a new one, but for whatever reason your brain couldn’t connect with your mouth and the thought left as quick as it came. “You still want that kitten? Mm? Want me to cum in y’r tight pussy, yea? Make you mine?” He kissed over your ankle and down your calf as he waited for an answer. When he didn’t get one he spanks you lightly causing you to squeak in surprise “I said. Do you want me to cum inside you still? Mm? You fuckincockdrunk over there?” He said teasingly and you nodded quickly 

“Yes - t’both, probably” you admit and he chuckled, bending over and giving you a chaste kiss to the temple 

“Such a good girl” he praised, rubbing your clit quicker so you would clench around him. You squirmed beneath him, sensitive from your last orgasm but not able to tell him to stop- it felt too fucking good. “I know Angel- I know, almost there fuck jus’ a minute” he grunted, thrusting harder and groaning out hotly. “Thaaaas’ it - fuck so fuckin close bunny gonna fill up this pretty pussy- so fuckin tight god” he moaned out hotly, head dropping back in bliss as he absolutely wrecked you. 

But you couldn’t help but look at him with half lidded blissed out eyes thinking that he looked like the incarnate of a Greek fucking statue that has an enormous cock. “Fuckin need it- need it- make me yours Carmy” you begged out, finally finding your voice again when you felt him twitch inside of you. He had helped you over the edge tonight - showed you what it meant to feel good - so you figured the least you could do is help him get there once. 

“Yeah? Tell me again baby, what do you need?” He rasps, finding it harder to hold back, but he had to hear you say it. 

“Cum inside of me, Bear. Make me yours, mark me.” You said between gasps and mewls, and he couldn’t hold back anymore. His eyes squeeze shut as he thrusts a few more times before setting himself inside you to the hilt and moaning hotly as he releases a huge hot string of cum inside of you, groaning as he thrusts slowly, releasing spurt after spurt of white cream that felt so warm, so right. 

“Thank you- thank you squish, thank you” he rambled, cum gushing down the curve of your ass onto the sheets as he milked himself of every last drop with the help of your tight cunt. “God you are so fucking perfect” he said, his voice honeyed with lust and admiration. You pulled him to lay on top of you, his cock still deep inside. “I can pull out whenever-“

You interrupt him with a sweet, gentle, open mouthed kiss running your tongue over his and nudging your noses together gently before whispering  “Let’s just stay like this for a while”

You stayed like that for about 15 minutes, until Carmy told you that he had to get you cleaned up and make sure that you used the restroom since you had gone so many rounds. By that time though, you had gotten all too comfortable with your leg around his waist and nuzzled into his neck, starting to fall asleep. 

“But I don’t even haveee to peee” you whined, causing him to huff a chuckle, rubbing your side encouragingly. 

“You have to do a few things before we nap, ok? I’ll even carry you cmon, let me up little monkey” he teased, picking up your arm and dropping it. You pretended it was dead weight, mushing your cheek into his chest more, enjoying the smell of his sweat mixed with his cologne. 

“Mm comfy here” you mused and he gently brushed your sweaty auburn hair from your forehead. 

“I can tell you’re comfy cause you sound like you’re about t’fall asleep, squish. I was gonna make you a grilled cheese- if you listen” he mused and your head perked up. 

“The one with the Parmesan on the outside so it’s all crunchy?” You asked hopefully and he smiled adoringly, brushing his thumb over your cheekbone 

“And creamy tomato soup” he added and you peeled your arm from around him, sweaty skin sticking together as you pulled your bodies apart. You stretched, wincing a bit at the feeling in your lower back. 

“Mm- we went hard” you said, and he gently helped hoist you so you were sitting up 

“We did- sorry - was it too much?” He slipped on his boxers and came over to your side of the bed, scooping you up bridal style and kissing your forehead sweetly as he padded over to his en suite bathroom, gently setting you on the toilet and pulling out a good amount of toilet paper, folding it for you as you went. 

“It wasn’t- ew why is my pee like…hot” you laughed causing him to chuckle as well as he handed over the toilet paper, before turning to the sink to wash his hands to give you privacy while you cleaned yourself up. 

“Uh- kinda stupid but I read in this book that f’girls it like… is a defense thing for bacteria er’ some shit?” He chuckled and you giggle as you flush the toilet 

“You read a sex book- woah-“ you attempted getting up but your thighs felt impossibly weak, and if it wasn’t for Carmy quickly noticing and dropping the hand towel to quickly grab your arms and steady you, you’d have fallen. 

“Woahh there, Bambi, lemme help you, yeah? S’what I’m here for” he assured you and carefully helped you over to the counter, holding you up by your waist so you could wash your hands. 

“Thanks- sorry. Dunno why I feel like I just ran 15 miles I barely did anything” you said shyly as you rinsed your hands with soap and water. 

“S’just your first time, baby. It’s all normal don’ worry” he said, planting gentle kisses along your neck down to your shoulder where he’d left little purple marks. 

“Oh-“ you said a bit worriedly as you saw the scratch marks in the mirror that you’d left on his bicep, so deep they looked nearly bruised,  touching over them with your finger lightly “I hurt you- I’m so sorry” you whisper, looking down at them and he shook his head. 

“Don’t worry kitten, loved it, felt good” he kissed your cheek gently and scooped you back up with ease, carrying you to his laundry room and sitting you on top of the dryer 

“What are we in here for?” You questioned and he grabbed a pair of clean boxers from his hamper as well as one of his old the beef t-shirts that had been freshly washed as well. 

“T’get you dressed so you don’t freeze to death” he said as if it was obvious, forgetting that your clothes that laid beneath you both in the bed that you had worn here were likely soaking wet which made you scrunch your nose. 

“And get new sheets” he said with a smirk as if he could read your mind, it always felt like he could. He gently eased your ankles into each leg hole, pulling them up to your thighs and slipping the shirt over your head, helping your arms through before helping you down and pulling the boxer briefs up the rest of the way. 

“Alright you can chill on the couch while I get all that shit in the wash, yea?” He picked you up, lifting you onto his shoulder like a sack of flour and you gasp and squeal laugh when he spanks you playfully 

“Oh my god! Carmy!” You laugh, holding onto his shoulder as he carried you to his living room and gently dumped you on his couch where all of this started, and HalloweenTown was now back at the beginning screen asking if you wanted to replay the movie. 

“I have to transport you somehow when these legs are useless” he teased and rested his knee on the couch, bending over and giving you a quick kiss on the head. “Lemme go change those sheets and I’ll be right out to make you your food, in the meantime though I want you drinkin’ this” he sets your yeti cup that was still full of ice water next to you on the side table and you smile a bit. 

“Do you act this nice with all the girls you sleep with or am I just special” you said jokingly. His smile faltered for a moment as he thought about what he was going to say. 

No, I’m pretty sure I would only ever act this way the first time I slept with someone if it was the person I’d been desperately in love with since middle school - 

But he’d never say that out loud, the boldness from all the adrenaline and testosterone he’d been flooded with in the throes of passion have came and went. So he settled on,

“No, squish. You’re just special” he kissed the top of your head before heading back into his bedroom to deal with the waterlogged sheets you two had left. You nibbled on the inside of your lip, deep in thought as to what this meant for your relationship going forward, his words ringing around in your mind, until he came out- carrying a bundle of sheets in his arms, his biceps flexing as he carried them all to the laundry room. 

“How’s that water comin’ squish?” He called from the laundry room as he loaded up the washing machine, shit- you had one job while he was gone and failed to do it. 

“Good!” You lied, grabbing the cup and quickly chugging down a good 5 gulps, the icy feeling chasing all the way down to your stomach that grumbled at the contact making you realize it had been a while since you ate. 

“I didn’t hear that cup move once before I asked. I was listening” he said amused, returning out of the laundry room in gray sweatpants that hung low on his hips and he padded into the kitchen, getting out a pan to heat. 

“Okay creepy, listening to my water habits- I’m gonna watch my movie now that you so filthily interrupted with your… your…” you try to find the word and he laughs, getting out what he needed for the soup and your sandwiches 

“Myyyyyy….” He teased 

“Sluttiness!!! Your masculine- pull” you said and you both cracked up, shaking his head 

“You’re a fuckin dork” he mused and you smiled, shrugging as you hit play on your movie once again. 

“You love dorks. It’s why we’re best friends”  

It wasn’t long until Carmy came over with a steaming bowl of soup, and 4 squares of amazing grilled cheese on a plate and sat It down at the coffee table. “Careful the soup is hot” he warned and you grabbed one of the little triangles right away, taking a bite and moaning 

“Mm best grilled cheese In the world” you rest your head on his shoulder, chewing happily and your eyes fluttering shut in bliss. 

He chuckled a bit, having a bite of his own that of course wasn’t as beautifully plated and prepared as yours was (and had gone a bit cold since he always made yours last so it would be hot and melty for you) “really? You think that could be an award I could get, should we call Guinness?” He joked, causing you to laugh a bit. 

People often thought Carmy wasn’t funny, or that he didn’t have the ability to make conversation  - he was simply very shy, and observant. When you were in public too, he didn’t have a problem joking around with you - but with people he doesn’t know, he prefers to sit back for quite a while and observe the way they react to other people before he tries to interact himself. It made you two a great pair, because you always trusted his judgment. 

“We really should. Hey- why do you always make mine all pretty?” You asked, realizing that you always noticed it but had never brought it up before. He hummed in contemplation, swallowing before saying 

“I dunno. Cause you deserve nice things” he said simply before taking another bite. You scrunched your brows together, doing the same as you thought. 

“You deserve nice things” you said and he nodded 

“Already got em’ got all the nice things I need” he said and finished off his first half before having a sip of water from the glass he’d brought for himself. You weren’t sure what he was saying, Carmy didn’t allow himself to have like…anything. 

“What are those?” You asked and he looked at you 

“Well, you’re my best friend. S’all I need, I realized after I came back from New York I’d rather be your friend and stay here then be anyone else, I love being your friend, squish. You’re a great friend” he said earnestly. Your cheeks suddenly felt hot, and you felt a lump in your throat like you could cry 

“Bear I love being your friend” you put your sandwich on the plate and wrap your arms around him. He held you, kissing your cheek gently as he rubbed your back, enveloping you in one of those deep warm hugs you knew him for. He always gave Bear Hug a new meaning to you. “But-“ you pulled away and look at him, biting your lip gently. “We can keep being friends… after what we did- right?” You asked and his eyes widened before nodding like it was the craziest question in the world. 

“Are you- yes- yes squish. That wouldn’t ever change me wanting to be your friend - nothing could change that.” He cupped your cheek gently “you- y’re everything t’me” he said softly, stroking your cheek with his thumb lightly. 

“So are you…are you doing this kinda thing with other girls still?” You asked meekly, eyes drifting to your lap. He took his other hand, bringing it to your other cheek and angling your face up to look at him once again. 

“Do you want me to stop seeing other women?” He asked, his voice low, soft, honest. You swallowed thickly in contemplation, looking into his eyes. You wanted to say yes, but you didn’t want to feel selfish in case he didn’t feel the same, but if he didn’t feel the same you didn’t want to do that with him again. 

“Yes- b-but…but if you don’t want to…that’s ok, carm. I just- I only want it to be us…” you said softly. He eased you into his lap, stroking your auburn hair gently and kissing your jaw up to your cheek and over to your lips, giving you a deep affectionate kiss, one that made your heart feel like it was going to burst with butterflies. After a few moments he pulled away and muttered against your lips, “It’s just us from now on” 

Tagging bestie boops: @gallaghersgal @mouseymilkovich @daysofyellowroses @l4long-winded @carmybrainworms

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Kickstarting the audiobook of The Lost Cause, my novel of environmental hope

Tonight (October 2), I'm in Boise to host an event with VE Schwab. On October 7–8, I'm in Milan to keynote Wired Nextfest.

The Lost Cause is my next novel. It's about the climate emergency. It's hopeful. Library Journal called it "a message hope in a near-future that looks increasingly bleak." As with every other one of my books Amazon refuses to sell the audiobook, so I made my own, and I'm pre-selling it on Kickstarter:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/doctorow/the-lost-cause-a-novel-of-climate-and-hope

That's a lot to unpack, I know. So many questions! Including this one: "How is it that I have another book out in 2023?" Because this is my third book this year. Short answer: I write when I'm anxious, so I came out of lockdown with nine books. Nine!

Hope and writing are closely related activities. Hope (the belief that you can make things better) is nothing so cheap and fatalistic as optimism (the belief that things will improve no matter what you do). The Lost Cause is full of people who are full of hope.

The action begins a full generation after the Hail Mary passage of the Green New Deal, and the people who grew up fighting the climate emergency (rather than sitting hopelessly by while the powers that be insisted that nothing could or should be done) have a name for themselves: they call themselves "the first generation in a century that doesn't fear the future."

I fear the future. Unchecked corporate power has us barreling over a cliff's edge and all the one-percent has to say is, "Well, it's too late to swerve now, what if the bus rolls and someone breaks a leg? Don't worry, we'll just keep speeding up and leap the gorge":

https://locusmag.com/2022/07/cory-doctorow-the-swerve/

That unchecked corporate power has no better avatar than Amazon, one of the tech monopolies that has converted the old, good internet into "five giant websites, each filled with screenshots of the other four":

https://twitter.com/tveastman/status/1069674780826071040

Amazon maintains a near-total grip over print and ebooks, but when it comes to audiobooks, that control is total. The company's Audible division has captured more than 90% of the market, and it abuses that dominance to cram Digital Rights Management onto every book it sells, even if the author doesn't want it:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/25/can-you-hear-me-now/#acx-ripoff

I wrote a whole-ass book about this and it came out less than a month ago; it's called The Internet Con and it lays out an audacious plan to halt the internet's enshittification and throw it into reverse:

http://www.seizethemeansofcomputation.org/

The tldr is this: when an audiobook is wrapped in Amazon's DRM, only Amazon can legally remove it. That means that every book I sell you on Audible is a book you have to throw away if you ever break up with Amazon, and Amazon can use the fact that it's hold you hostage to screw me – and every other author – over.

As I said last time this came up:

Fuck that sideways.

With a brick.

My books are sold without DRM, so you can play them in any app and do anything copyright permits, and that means Amazon won't carry them, and that means my publishers don't want to pay to produce them, and that means I produce them myself, and then I make the (significant) costs back by selling them on Kickstarter.

And you know what? It works. Readers don't want DRM. I mean, duh. No one woke up this morning and said, "Dammit, why won't someone sell me a product that lets me do less with my books?" I sell boatloads" of books through these crowdfunding campaigns. I sold so many copies of my last book, *The Internet Con, that they sold out the initial print run in two weeks (don't worry, they held back stock for my upcoming events).

But beyond that, I think there's another reason my readers keep coming back, even though I wrote a genuinely stupid number of books while working through lockdown anxiety while the wildfires raged and ashes sifted down out of the sky and settled on my laptop as I lay in my backyard hammock, pounding my keyboard.

(I went through two keyboards during lockdown. Thankfully, I bought a user-serviceable laptop from Framework and fixed it myself both times, in a matter of minutes. No, no one pays me to mention this, but hot damn is it cool.)

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/13/graceful-failure/#frame

The reason readers come back to my books is that they're full of hope. In the same way that writing lets me feel like I'm not a passenger in life, but rather, someone with a say in my destination, the books that I write are full of practical ways and dramatic scenes in which other people seize the means of computation, the reins of power or their own destinies.

The protagonist of The Lost Cause is Brooks Palazzo, a high-school senior in Burbank whose parents were part of the original cohort of volunteers who kicked off the global transformation, and left him an orphan when they succumbed to one of the zoonotic plagues that arise every time another habitat is destroyed.

Brooks grew up knowing what his life would be: the work of repair and care, which millions of young people are doing. Relocating entire cities off endangered coastlines and floodplains, or out of fire-zones. Fighting floods and fires. Caring for tens of millions of refugees for whom the change came too late.

But with every revolution comes a counter-revolution. The losers of a just war don't dig holes, climb inside and pull the dirt down on top of themselves. Two groups of reactionaries – seagoing anarcho-capitalist billionaire wreckers and seething white nationalist militias – have formed an alliance.

They've already gotten their champion into the White House. Next up: dismantling every cause for hope Brooks and his friends have, and bringing back the fear.

That's the setup for a novel about solidarity, care, library socialism, and snatching victory from defeat's jaws. Writing it help keep me sane during the lockdown, and when it came time to record the audiobook, I spent a lot of time thinking about who could read it. I've had some great narrators: Wil Wheaton, @neil-gaiman, Amber Benson, Bronson Pinchot, and more.

I record my audiobooks with Skyboat Media, a brilliant studio near my place in LA. Back in August, I spent a week in their recording booth – "The Tardis" – doing something I'd never tried before: I recorded a whole audiobook, with directorial supervision: The Internet Con:

https://transactions.sendowl.com/products/78992826/DEA0CE12/purchase

When it was done, the director – audiobook legend Gabrielle de Cuir – sat me down and said, "Look, I've never said this to an author before, but I think you should read The Lost Cause. I don't direct anyone anymore except for Wil Wheaton and LeVar Burton, but I would direct you on this one."

I was immensely flattered – and very nervous. Reading The Internet Con was one thing – the book is built around the speeches I've been giving for 20 years and I knew I could sell those lines – but The Lost Cause is a novel, with a whole cast of characters. Could I do it?

Reader, I did it. I just listened to the proofs last week and:

It.

Came.

Out.

Great.

The Lost Cause goes on sale on November 14th, and I'll be selling this audiobook I made everywhere audiobooks are sold – except for the stores that require DRM, nonconsensually shackling readers and writers to their platforms. So you'll be able to get it on Libro.fm, downpour.com, even Google Play – but not Audible, Apple Books, or Audiobooks.com.

But in addition to those worthy retailers, I will be sending out thousands – and thousands! – of audiobook to my Kickstarter backers on the on-sale date, either as a folder of DRM-free MP3s, or as a download code for Libro.fm, to make things easy for people who don't want to have to figure out how to sideload an audiobook into a standalone app.

And, of course, the mobile duopoly have made this kind of sideloading exponentially harder over the past decade, though far be it from me to connect this with their policy of charging 30% commissions on everything sold through an app, a commission they don't receive if you get your files on the web and load 'em yourself:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/doctorow/red-team-blues-another-audiobook-that-amazon-wont-sell/posts/3788112

As with my previous Kickstarters, I'm also selling ebooks and hardcovers – signed or unsigned, and this time I've found a great partner to fulfill EU orders from within the EU, so backers won't have to pay VAT and customs charges. The wonderful Otherland – who have hosted me on my last two trips to Berlin – are going to manage that shipping for me:

https://www.otherland-berlin.de/en/home.html

Kim Stanley Robinson read the book and said, "Along with the rush of adrenaline I felt a solid surge of hope. May it go like this." That's just about the perfect quote, because the book is a ride. It's not just a kumbaya tale of a better world that is possible: it's a post-cyberpunk novel of high-tech guerrilla and meme warfare, climate tech and bad climate tech, wildcat prefab urban infill, and far-right militamen who adapt to a ban on assault-rifles by switching to super-soakers full of hydrochloric acid.

It's a book about struggle, hope in the darkness, and a way through this rotten moment. It's a book that dares to imagine that things might get worse but also better. This is a curious emotional melange, but it's one that I'm increasingly feeling these days.

Like, Amazon, that giant bully, whose blockade on DRM-free audiobooks cost me enough money to pay off my mortgage and put my kid through university (according to my agent)? The incredible Lina Khan brought a long-overdue antitrust case against Amazon while her rockstar DoJ counterpart, Jonathan Kanter, is dragging Google through the courts.

The EU is taking on Apple, and French cops are kicking down Nvidia's doors and grabbing their files, looking to build another antitrust case for monopolizing GPUs. The writers won their strike and Joe Biden walked the picket-line with the UAW, the first president in history to join striking workers:

https://doctorow.medium.com/joe-biden-is-headed-to-a-uaw-picket-line-in-detroit-f80bd0b372ab?sk=f3abdfd3f26d2f615ad9d2f1839bcc07

Solar is now our cheapest energy source, which is wild, because if we could only capture 0.4% of the solar energy that makes it through the atmosphere, we could give everyone alive the same energy budget as Canadians (who have American lifestyles but higher heating bills). As Deb Chachra writes in her forthcoming How Infrastructure Works (my review pending): we get a fresh supply of energy every time the sun rises and we only get new materials when a comet survives atmospheric entry, but we treat energy as scarce and throw away our materials after a single use:

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/612711/how-infrastructure-works-by-deb-chachra/

Anything that can't go on forever will eventually stop. We have shot past many of our planetary boundaries and there are waves of climate crises in our future, but they don't have to be climate disasters. That's up to us – it'll depend on whether we come together to save ourselves and each other, or tear ourselves apart.

The Lost Cause dares to imagine what it might be like if we do the former. We don't live in a post-enshittification world yet, but we could. With these indie audiobooks, I've found a way to treat the terminal enshittification of the Amazon monopoly as damage and route around it. I hope you'll back the Kickstarter, fight enshittification, inject some hope into your reading, and enjoy a kickass adventure novel in the process:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/doctorow/the-lost-cause-a-novel-of-climate-and-hope

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/02/the-lost-cause/#the-first-generation-that-doesnt-fear-the-future

[pedriscroquettes]

𝐁𝐘𝐀𝐊 ✮ FLORIAN WIRTZ

summary. it’s kind of pathetic the way the two of you always come crawling back to each other.

warnings. emotional warfare. florian is down bad. light smut but heavy feelings. florian is lowkey pathetic in this. 18+

gabri speaks! unfortunately i am a florian girlie. anyways i’m back! heavily inspired by byak by alvaro diaz ft. rauw alejandro.

THE CROWD GROANS as florian hits the crossbar for the second time that night. the camera man makes sure to zoom in on him as his hands go up in frustration. florian stares at the goalkeeper in disbelief as he runs back into his position. another missed chance, another bad rating, another night of him stressing himself out. if there was one person in all of germany that night happy about his performance it was you.

your relationship with the player was controversial, what was once a promising relationship had turned sour, and quickly. the two of you had mutually decided that a committed relationship wasn’t in the cards for either of you. it had grown toxic to the point where you’d flirt with his teammates on purpose to provoke him which worked because you’d always end up in his bed and never in a foreign room. in fact you couldn’t quite remember when was the last time you had hooked up with anyone else.

meanwhile the brunette found himself staring at his phone on the ride home. chatter and music filled the team bus yet only one thing clouded his mind, did you watch the match? he was hoping a teasing message of yours would already be in his notifications, and when he saw there’s wasn’t one he sighed. as his teammates argued over their errors and mistakes he couldn’t help opening the messages between the two of you. the countless deleted messages and hidden pictures as well as the timed ones made him remember the many nights the two of you would spend on the phone.

the sound of your voice filled his head and when he saw you were online he immediately turned off his phone. was it possible you had finally gotten tired of your messed up relationship?

“bro, are you okay?” kai asked seeing the state his teammate was in. florian’s leg was bouncing and his demeanor had changed dramatically.

“i’m fine, thanks.” he offered him a curt smile before staring out the window again.

he wasn’t fine, he was far from fine, in fact he felt worse than he did after missing the goal. he’s not sure why but as soon as the team arrives back to the hotel he’s on his way to your flat. he makes a quick stop at the chinese place the two of you like beforehand making sure he doesn’t show up empty handed. it was already pathetic enough that he was showing up past midnight he could at least make up an excuse with the food.

he hopes the black hoodie he wore is enough to hide his identity from bystanders. although with all the pacing he does outside your hallway he hopes no one thinks he’s a robber. as he adjusts his hoodie he can’t help but think, why am i so nervous? after all it’s not the first time he knocks on your door at these hours.

“do you hate me?” is the first thing you hear as you open the door.

you study his frame and notice his disheveled hair and the training kit from the national team. you’ve never seen him so disorganized and upset — if that was the right word to use — you were amused. as his face grows concerned with your lack of answer you notice the takeout he has in his hands. the poor guy was either desperate or he had lost his mind. both of which could be true.

“what the fuck florian?” you look at him weird as you question him.

“you didn’t text me today.” he says as if that simple sentence answered your question.

“so what? i don’t text you every other week and you never show up at my apartment with food. what’s going on?” you’re even more confused than before.

“you always text me after a game.” he tries to explain like it’s the most logical thing ever.

you can’t help the half scoff and half laugh you let out. he couldn’t be serious right now. was he seriously at your apartment past midnight because he was freaking out over a message?

“okay seriously you need to get a girlfriend you’re starting to creep me out.” you joke.

“you say that while you’re wearing my jersey.” he l doesn’t even need you to turn around to know that you were wearing the leverkusen jersey he had gifted you months ago.

there’s a moment of silence between the two of you it’s entrancing. you stare at him and realize he’d made his way over to you immediately after the game. all because he was waiting for your message. meanwhile there’s something about you wearing his jersey for casually that makes you all more enchanting to him. there’s a mutual look between the two of you and in the blink of an eye his hands are on your waist, yours on his jaw, and his lips are on yours.

it’s poetic really the way he closes your door as he pushes you into your apartment and drops the takeout on your coffee table in the process. your hands already digging into his hair and his hold you tight as he carried you into your room. it’s all muscle memory. the darkness of your bedroom adds to the feeling of having him so close to you again.

“i think i-” he pauses not wanting to be so vulnerable in this predicament but you know what he wants to say. you freeze.

“florian you know i can’t. it didn’t work out the first time. i can’t do it again.” you grab his jaw making sure the two of you are making eye contact. his brown eyes captivate yours.

“i can’t either but i can’t live without you.” he whispers the end. “it will always be you.”

you drag his hand towards the waistband of your shorts. it would always be him too. the only person that consumed your every thoughts and the only person you were worried about getting hurt was him. always. you look into his eyes as he drags his fingers to your core and sigh as he begins to tease you. he’s also the only man you fantasize about.

“promise?” you ask him.

the moonlight barely allows you to see him fully but you catch the smirk on his face. the same one that had captivated you years ago at the bar. his fingers are so close to your needy hole. you can’t help but audibly gasp as he inserts them inside you causing an illicit groan from him. your nails dig into his shoulders as he starts fucking you with his digits. meanwhile he kisses you from your collarbone to your neck.

“i promise.” he whispers against your ear.

he pumps his fingers in and out of you slowly helping you reach your high. it was only fair you were treated right. it was small details like this that had you wondering why the two of you couldn’t just commit to each other. you’re distracted as he leaves marks on your neck and his fingers curve inside you. you can’t help the loud moans that leave your mouth as you reach your high. your hands dig into the sheets as you come around his fingers.

he continues kissing you as he begins to take his hoodie off. you’re quick to stop him before he begins undressing himself.

“do i need to remind you that you didn’t score today? you’re not getting any tonight.” you adjust your shorts.

“so you did watch the game then.” he wraps his arms around you pulling you closer to him.

“i always do.” you whisper as you cuddle into him.

that’s how you spend the rest of the night, snuggled into his body as it rains outside. it’s quite an intimate moment shared between the two of you. you’re not quite sure if you should be worried or content with the turn your relationship with florian took. you decide it’s rather late and with the way he holds you you don’t think much more. after all he promised and while you knew florian was many things he was not an oath breaker.

[cosmicmunsonwrites]

Hi! I was wondering if you could do a smut fic of JJ Maybank where the raider is his girlfriend and a virgin and they have sex for the first time and he says “if you want me to stop tell me.” “You better tell me know cause once I start I don’t think I’ll be able to stop.”

like an animal

pairing(s): jj maybank x virgin!afab!reader

warnings: loss of virginity, smut, pet names, unprotected sex, oral, fingering, praise

summary: you decide to go all the way with jj.

authors note: i freaking love this idea!! thank you for the request and i hope you enjoy!

not edited

do not copy my works. i do not condone rewrites, translations, or edited versions. all my content is my content that i wrote.

not my gif

your hands tangled in your boyfriends thick, blonde hair as he buried his face between your legs. your thighs began to shake and you attempted to close them, but his ringed hand kept a tight grip to keep them open.

“jj,” you moaned. “feels so good.”

you could feel him grin against you. “yeah?” humming in approval, you tensed slightly when you felt his finger prod at your entrance. “this okay sweet girl?” not able to form any words, you simply nodded, hoping he could see it. “tell me if it hurts. even a little bit.”

you pulled your bottom lip between your teeth and squeezed your eyes shut. the feeling of his hot mouth sucking your clit and his finger slowly pushing into you was making you dizzy.

“you still with me baby?” he asked softly.

“mhm,” you hummed. you felt him push even further, feeling a slight resistance before it disappeared. you let out a shaky breath when his tongue was back to tending to your clit and his finger was buried inside you. “oh fuck j. ‘s so good,” you moaned.

his tongue worked faster, his finger beginning to pull back slightly before pushing right back in just as slow. “shit, sweetheart. already squeezing my finger like this, bet your pussys gonna feel like heavy around my cock.”

you felt a shiver run down your spine as your core tightened. “more. please,” you whined out, hands still toying with his hair.

“look at you baby,” he smiled proudly as he gently pushed another one in. “taking my fingers like such a good girl.”

your jaw fell slack as the pleasure doubled. his mouth was no longer on you, but his thumb was still rubbing circles over your clit. “jj, fuck,” you stammered. “it feels so good. can—can’t take it.”

“‘s okay, sweetheart,” he said soothingly, placing loving kisses over your shaking inner thighs and just above your core. “you can do it. almost there. jus’ relax.”

you tried your best to take deep breaths and allow your orgasm to wash over you, but the pleasure was hitting you like a bus. your hands tugged on his hair even harder as he worked you through it, slowly withdrawing his fingers and pressing a gentle kiss to your sensitive clit.

“did so good baby,” he praised, crawling up your body to press his lips to yours. you could taste yourself on him as his tongue searched your mouth. “‘m so proud of you.”

he laid another kiss to your lips, then your forehead before he began littering them down your neck and to your chest. his tongues lapped over your nipple before taking it into his mouth, his hands coming up to hold the soft flesh in his hands and gently knead them between his ringed fingers. the cold metal felt good against your burning skin.

you pressed your thighs together at the feeling. “jj, i want more.”

he chuckled against your skin before lifting his head to see you. “baby, what more do you want?” he asked in a playful tone. “i jus’ fingered you and popped your cherry while eating you out.”

you slapped his arm lightly. “no, j. not that. i want more.”

it was like a lightbulb went off in his brain. “oh!” his pupils were blown wide, his hair messy, and cheeks slightly flushed. “you sure about this sweet girl?”

you nodded immediately. “mhm.”

his pushed your hair from your face, pressing another kiss to your lips. “words, baby.”

“yes jj, i want this. want you,” you said.

“fuck,” he mumbled under his breath. “you can’t say that shit.”

you giggled to yourself and pulled his face down to your so you could kiss his soft lips. you could hear some jostling in the background, jj ridding himself of his boxers, but you didn’t really care. you just focused on the feeling of his lips against yours.

unfortunately though, it was cut short. “are you sure you want this? like sure sure?”

you nodded, eyes glued to his. “yes. i want this.”

“if you want me to stop, you gotta tell me baby. and if it hurts, i want you to tell me immediately,” he said firmly, letting you know he wasn’t playing about this.

“i know. i will,” you replied surely.

he pressed his lips against yours again to distract you, but you were still hyperaware that the head of his cock was resting against your opening. you felt his hands leave your waist, one to rub gentle circles on your clit.

he kissed you a little harder when he very slowly began to push his hips forward. you whimpered into his mouth at the uncomfortable stretch. it wasn’t painful, just new. your arms came to rest over his broad shoulders, pulling his closer to you until you were chest to chest.

the fingers rubbing at your clit sped up, trying to make up for the weird feeling this was giving you as he continued to push in about halfway. you couldn’t help but clench around his length, the pleasure on your clit feeling so good.

“fuck, sweetheart. need you to tell me now cause i once i start, don’t think i’ll be able to stop myself.”

you moaned at his words. “don’t want you to stop.”

“you’re gonna be the fuckin’ death of me, baby,” he whispered lowly against your lips.

[thewritingofamadwoman]

That’s My Girl

Another attempt at writing Roy Kent. Inspired by the amazingly sweet @onceuponaoneshotfanfic

Pairing: Roy Kent x Fem!Reader (established relationship)

Warnings: Tons of fluff, more of Roy Kent’s potty mouth, a secret relationship and Jamie Tartt being the reader and Roy’s unofficial child.

Enjoy!!

The second the words “no curfew tonight” came out of Ted Lasso’s mouth, you just knew the evening was going to be a fun one. Both you and Roy had agreed on the way to Amsterdam that you’d both spend the last night together, sightseeing and then staying in bed for hours while everyone else was none the wiser.

As the team’s co-pr manager, it was imperative that you tagged along on the trip for business reasons; Rebecca also told you if you didn’t come along and enjoy yourself she’d purposely make your life hell. So here you are, on the charter bus with the rest of your friends. You looked down at your phone, the time reading 5pm. Roy suggested meeting up at around 9pm, when everyone else was surely going to be in their rooms. It was the perfect plan…which meant it probably wasn’t going to happen.

You looked over at Roy, who gave you a sly wink before getting up and roaring at Jamie Tartt.

“Not for you Tartt!”

Your beloved got up and grabbed Jamie’s bag, tossing it to Will before storming outside. Jamie, depressed that he’d be spending the rest of his time in Amsterdam training, got up from his seat reluctantly. Before heading out, he stretched and looked back, noticing you seated in the back. As if having a moment of clarity, his brain immediately came up with what he thought was an ingenious plan. He called your name and once you looked up at him, he put his plan into action.

“Hey love, do you have any plans right now?” He smiled, everyone else on the bus discussing their potential curfew free plans.

“Not really, I was gonna head back to my room and nap for a bit I guess. Why?”

Jamie’s smile widened.

“Nahhh a gorgeous girl like you alone in a hotel room? Not happening. Come on, hang out with me and grandad for a bit.”

You laughed, and so did some of the players listening in.

“Fuck it, why not?” You said, and the bus is filled with loud cheers once more as you made your way towards Jamie, who took your hand and pulled you out of the bus with him. The first thing you saw was Roy’s back to the bus as he stretched his legs.

“Took you fucking long enou-what are you doing here?” Roy asked, his face full of genuine surprise. You shrugged and pointed to Jamie who smiled like the cat who caught the canary.

“This stunner was going to go back to the hotel alone and take a nap. In one of the worlds’ most beautiful cities. I couldn’t let that happen. And who better to keep her company than us fine, young gentleman. Well, some of us more young than others, isn’t that right grandad?”

Roy gave Jamie a deadpan expression and growled lowly. You shook your head and chuckled.

“I hope that’s alright? You don’t mind do you, Roy?” You gave the poor man one of your sweetest smiles, one that Roy had fallen in love with over the course of the last few months. Roy sighed and eventually nodded, the thoughts of the night he had planned for the two of you going down the drain. Jamie cheered and punched Roy’s shoulder, jogging backwards with his hands in the air.

“Come on Roy! Lighten up! Here, I’ll run ahead while you two trail behind me. Can’t have gorgeous here run in those heels. Fantastic heels by the way,” Jamie said as he ran his gaze from your heels to your face, winking as he reached your eyes. The striker was doing his absolute best to get Roy to react to him flirting with you. He knew the coach had feelings for you, it was painstakingly obvious. But he doubted the man would ever make a move. So his “genius plan” was to spend the evening turning on the signature Tartt charm as much as he could until Roy had no choice but to confess his love for you. The perfect plan, Jamie thought to himself.

You blushed at the compliment and laughed , shocked that he was flirting so boldly with you in front of your boyfriend. Not that he knew you two were an item, but still. Roy, on the other hand, was glaring so hard at Jamie that it was a surprise the young man hadn’t combusted into flame. Jamie gave you both a very cheeky smile, turned around, and began to run.

“Come on, grandad! Keep up!”

Roy growled and you laughed once more, causing the older man to look at you.

“And what are you laughing at?” Roy grumbled, stuffing his hands in his pockets as you two began to walk, keeping Jamie in your sights as he ran up ahead.

“At how easy it is for Jamie Tartt to get you riled up. He’s only being silly, don’t let it bother you,” you smiled, reaching over and placing a hand on Roy’s arm.

“And besides, we did want to sightsee, and now we get to do that earlier than planned,” you added, looking around at the beautiful city around you. Roy scoffed and looked back at you.

“Yeah, I wanted us to sightsee without Jamie Fucking Tartt running around like a child we need to keep on a leash.” You giggled and Roy’s lip ticked upwards, the sound of your laugh being one of his favorite things.

“I don’t know babe, this might be a glimpse into our future,” you teased sweetly, looking at Roy playfully. Once again, Roy snorted and turned to look at you.

“Please, our children will be way more behaved than that twat.”

“Oh, so you’ve thought about our future children hmm?” Your heart soared at the thought of Roy seeing a future with you. Roy looked at you dumbfounded, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Of course. Why the fuck wouldn’t I?”

Your heart melted, and you were about to reply when Jamie suddenly appeared from behind the both of you, squeezing himself in between you and wrapping an arm around each of your shoulders.

“Look at you two, looking all chummy. And look at this magnificent city! Have either of you seen the tulip gardens? Or the windmills? We’re actually coming up to the world famous Skinny Bridge, just up ahead. Did you know that it’s one of the most romantic places in the world? Legend says that a kiss between lovers while on this bridge ensures that they will be in love forever. Isn’t that LOVELY, Roy?”

Jamie had pulled you both close to him, and thus each other as he continued to spit fact after fact about the romantic connotations of the bridge. Roy looked murderous, annoyed at Jamie’s incessant chatter. Roy had originally planned to take you to the bridge later that night to share that very same fact. He was a romantic at heart, and you were one of the very few people to know that about the mysterious Roy Kent. He was also a man with a VERY short fuse.

“Fan-fucking-tastic,” he growled, and the striker stepped forward from between the two of you and turned around, running in place while he faced you.

“I think it’s lovely, Jamie,” you said, trying to defuse any tension and placate the young man. Jamie beamed at you.

“I thought you would. I bet even someone as tough and grumpy as Roy believes in true love, don’t you Coach?” Jamie began his jumping jacks while looking at Roy, who only grunted in response. The Mancunian then pulled out his phone and handed it to Roy.

“Come on Coach, take a few pictures of the two of us and I’ll take a few of you two as well!” He said enthusiastically as he grabbed your hand and pulled you along with him towards the bridge. After a few photos with you, Jamie suggested he take a few photos of you alone on the bridge. You agreed, posing and laughing, causing both men to smile as they watched you. Roy even let out a laugh as you posed dramatically on the railing of the bridge. As you continued to look out onto the water, Jamie nudged Roy.

“Look at her, mate. She’s fucking stunning. Do you think she’s seeing anyone? I mean, any man would be a fool not to snatch her up and never let her go. I mean, look at her,” Jamie nodded towards you as you were being approached by another young couple who asked you to take their photo. Roy watched as you smiled politely and took a few pictures of the couple, watching you light up as they loved the pictures and thanked you. Jamie watched Roy’s expression, seeing how the man let down his guard as he looked at you. Jamie nudged him again.

“Go on mate, don’t let someone else come along and steal her away. Don’t let another man have the opportunity to stare at that bum. I mean LOOK at that ass-“ Jamie was cut off from his sweet-turned-idiotic ramble by Roy advancing on him.

“Watch your fucking mouth, Tartt,” but before Roy’s fist could collide with his face, Jamie called your name, catching your attention.

“Would you like some pictures with Coach Kent? I’m sure he’d love to take some with you!”

Jamie watched as Roy glared at him before walking over to you to stand next to you almost begrudgingly.

“What, don’t want to take a picture with me?” You teased him and he gave you a look.

“Don’t start, you know that’s not true.”

“Come on now guys, you’re on a romantic bridge. How about you pretend to, you know, be in love or something. Like a couple. Pose couple-y. Go on.”

You and Roy looked at one another, before you decided to just play along. You stood close to Roy and placed a hand on his chest, stepping closer than you usually would when you weren’t alone together. As if running on autopilot, the second you stood close to him, Roy’s arm snaked around your waist. Jamie whistled and Roy glared even harder than before. You could tell Jamie was starting to get to him.

“Just take the photo please, Jamie.” You pleaded with a small smile. You had a sneaking suspicion that Jamie knew what he was doing but didn’t want to think of that yet, choosing to focus on the smell of Roy’s cologne and the feel of his warmth against you. After a few pictures, Jamie decided to start up on his training again and began skipping forward.

After a few more stops at historic landmarks and a few more ridiculous flirtatious comments and innuendos from Jamie, you paused for a moment of respite by a chip shop. Jamie went in to use the bathroom when you turned to Roy, who was fuming.

“I’m going to fucking kill him. If he talks about windmills ONE more time, I’m going to throw him over the fucking bridge!” You giggled at his anger and tried to soothe him, placing a hand on one of Roy’s arms.

“I don’t know if you can tell, but I’m pretty sure Jamie is either on to us or really wants to play match maker,” you admitted and Roy grunted.

“Yeah I know, he’s a smooth as a bull in a china shop. Phoebe would have been more subtle than him,” You let out a laugh and nodded and Roy continued. “I have half a mind to give in and tell him. But watching him think he’s failing at getting us together truly gives my soul the peace it needs.”

You laughed harder and Jamie finally made his way back with an order of chips in one hand and a tulip in the other. He walked up to you and handed you both.

“Crisp chips and a flower for the lovely lady. Coach maybe you should take notes, this is how you treat a beautiful woman,” Jamie preened and you could see Roy’s resolve begin crumble. Jamie was going to leave Amsterdam with a black eye if he didn’t stop pushing Roy’s buttons. You decided you had enough and made your move.

“I don’t think Roy needs any tips on how to treat a woman, Jamie. He makes sure I’m nice and satisfied at least twice every morning before even heading off to work. Now, if you’re done teasing him: yes we’re together, no, no one knows except for you and we’d like to keep it that way please, and thank you for the chips. Shall we continue?”

You didn’t wait for Jamie or Roy to reply before stepping forward and making your way down the cobblestone street, popping a warm chip into your mouth and twirling the tulip in your hand. Roy’s eyes followed you, full of pride and love, impressed at how you handled the situation. Jamie, however, looked like a fish out of water, mouth opening and closing before finding words.

“You fucking cunts, you’ve been together this entire time?? For how long?? I’ve been trying to get you to admit you like her for HOURS!”

Roy gave a smug, satisfied smile.

“Not that it’s any of your fucking business, but today marks six months. And I had fucking dinner plans tonight but you and your fucking windmills ruined it.”

Jamie was still gaping, staring back and forth between your retreating figure and Roy’s smug face.

“Six fucking months?! Roy Kent, you absolute legend. She’s wonderful, I’m happy for you Coach.”

Roy smiled and for a split second, he could see himself becoming closer friends with the team striker.

“Oi!”

Your voice brought both Jamie and Roy’s attention back to you.

“Are you two coming or not? I was promised windmills and I want to see windmills!”

You smiled at your boys, one hand holding your flower and chips and the other hand on your hip as you waited for them to come to you.

“That’s your girl, mate.” Jamie teased as he looked at the taller man. Roy smirked, a genuine smile before nodding his head.

“That’s my girl.”

And with that, both men caught up with you. You passed the chips to Jamie before hooking your arm with Roy’s, the three of you making your way to wherever the windmill hunt took you.

[simpxxstan]

it isn't you

pairing: elementary school teacher!boo seungkwan x f.reader

genre: fluff and angst.

summary: you're ready to begin a completely new life in seoul, away from your ex-husband and your baggage of regrets. but fate has different plans for you when you meet seungkwan again, and this time, you don't want to let go.

word count: 8.3k words

rating: pg 13 

warnings: reader is a single mother. mentions of divorce, cold parents, poor parent-child relationship, anxiety and worries. mention of accidental pregnancy.

a/n: i CRAVE seungkwan w babies content and i wrote this completely to indulge my own craving. hope you enjoy! as always, would love to hear your thoughts!! reblogs and comments are so much appreciated <3

this is part of the boys over flowers series featuring booseoksoon + chan! this is the second instalment in that series.

“Eomma, there’s no need to be so scared!” Dahyun reminds you, putting her little hands on your arms as she hugs you. “Yes, yes,” you pause your mumbling and hug her back. It’s hard to believe that she turned four last week because she still feels so tiny in your arms. She’s definitely more calm than you as you both stand in front of the school you’ve come to enrol her at.

“It’s just… I’m just checking that you have everything with you. Okay. Eomma will come at three pm, and get you started in the creche, okay? Please listen to your teachers. If you want, talk to your classmates, hmm? I won’t force yo-” “Eomma! Shh! I’ve been to a school before, you know? I know how schools work.” She makes a serious face, and you laugh. “Alright, darling. When Eomma comes, let me know how your first day was. I love you Dahyun-ah, have fun, hmm?” And you press kisses to the side of her head before she plants a wet smooch on your cheek and runs off. “Bye Eomma!”

And she runs without looking back, and you wonder how she’s so relaxed and you’re so tense about her first day.

Probably because you had been a wreck throughout your school days. Well, she’s turned out to be quite not like you. Good for her. Easy for you. You remember your mother being so stressed because her daughter cried after every first day in each new class year at school, didn’t make a single friend till she turned seven, and barely scraped through most of her classes. Yeah, easy for you. 

It’s been two months since you’ve shifted from Gwangju to Seoul, and to be honest, you’ve felt like it’s your first day in school again for each day of the last two months. Finding a place for yourself and your daughter, settling down in your new job, and now, getting your daughter’s life started after you uprooted it in the middle of the school year when you moved out of Gwangju. It’s nice that Dahyun’s barely made a mess about it all- she’s honestly too understanding as a child, and you don’t deserve her- but it’s still worrying for you to see your daughter go through all this at such a tender age and think of what impact it may have on her later. Your parents haven’t been the least bit supportive, so all you have is Dahyunie and all she has is you. 

When you’re getting up on the bus, once you see Dahyun safely enter the school campus, you feel your phone buzz. It’s your boss calling to find out where you are. You’ve already informed work that you’re going to be about half an hour late so it’s an entirely unnecessary call, but you know he’s a little nosy, although not necessarily with bad intentions. In less than twenty minutes, you’ve reached office and got buried nose-deep into work, and soon, it’s three pm already. 

When you arrive at Sebong Elementary School, you see a crowd of parents and their tiny tots gathered around what you think is the hall where the creche is going to be organised. You’re frantically looking for Dahyun in the crowd, when something comes and jumps at your knees. “Eomma!” A brightly-smiling Dahyun hugs your legs and you quickly bend down to pick her up. “Hi, hi, sorry I’m late, I got-” “It’s okay, Eomma.” She kisses you on the cheek before wrapping herself like a koala on your side. “How was your first day, baby?” “Good. Not 5 stars because there was so much crying-” “Oh dear, why?” “Because some of the other kids were missing home! I didn’t cry, because I was having fun talking to my teachers and making friends and colouring into my alphabet book and-” “Oh, darling you made friends? Such a brave baby,” you kiss her, as you both walk towards the hall and Dahyun continues her loud rambling all about her school day. And soon, along with the other twenty-odd parents and their children, you finally make it into the hall. There are two teachers standing up on one side, greeting the children. You can see one of them is a female, wearing a bright green banner pasted to her shirt with her name printed on it. The other teacher is a male, and he has his back towards you. You slowly make your way to the female teacher, who apparently Dahyun recognises from one of her classes. Once she’s greeted you two and assigned you a seat, you sit there quietly. Dahyun finds a few familiar faces in the crowds and you make small talk with their parents, while the others settle down. 

“Hello everyone! Welcome to Sebong Creche! We’re so happy to have you all here with us.” The female teacher greets the crowd and everyone smiles and claps softly, as do you. Suddenly your phone is buzzing. It’s your boss again. Seems that the message that you’re taking the half day off hasn’t reached him, so you’re trying to type him a message when a voice surprises you. 

No, it, in fact, makes your head spin and your heart stop. 

“My name is Boo Seungkwan and this is Choi Ria! We’ll be taking care of the creche for the next six months! Pleased to meet you all.”

Fuck. Your phone slips and drops from your hand and Dahyun yelps in your lap in surprise. The phone makes a dreadfully loud sound, and in the silence of the room, everyone looks at you. You gulp and pick up your phone, trying to avoid drawing more attention, but you can’t help but notice one pair of eyes fixated on you, the single person you’d tried to avoid.

Seungkwan. 

And god, he looks just the same as he did five years ago when you’d seen him last before leaving for Gwangju. His hair is now brown and his blue sweater brings out the fresh glow of his skin, and fuck you if every regret of your life isn’t flooding into your mind at this very second. The female teacher speaks up, thankfully taking the attention from you, but not Seungkwan. His eyes still linger on yours, a confused expression in his eyes, before looking away and breaking eye contact. 

Oh god. Just when everything was going to go right. 

_

Once the initial briefings are over, parents are offered the chance to leave and pick their children back again at the designated time, or sit through this first session as the kids get used to the creche atmosphere. Dahyun is right- too many kids are crying. And you would too, if you had been here. But Dahyun is lively, she’s confidently eating her banana and singing to herself as the teachers give everyone their snacks.

But to be fair, your eyes are only on Seungkwan. He’s moving around with a lithe familiarity, and children cling to him with every minor inconvenience. It’s in the way he’s talking to them, the way he’s approaching them, and in the way he’s handling them with so much care, that you already feel safe about leaving Dahyun here. 

It’s not a new sensation, though. Feeling safe around him. 

So when everyone leaves and Dahyun has finally packed her bag and run to the spot you’ve been sitting all the while, you pick her up and turn around to find Seungkwan standing near you. Up close, even with the tiredness setting into his features, you notice how manly and mature he looks- so different from the fresh-faced college boy you’d left behind in Seoul so many years ago. 

“Hello Ms. Y/L/N. Thank you for trusting your… daughter with us.”

Oh. Formals. So it’s going to be like that, is it. Dahyun giggles when Seungkwan extends a hand to pat her hair, his hand awfully close to your own hand, so he quickly takes his hand away. “Seungkwanie Ssaem likes tangerines, he said! I like banana!” Dahyun giggles again, and you finally let out a breath and say, “I’m relieved to know that I’m leaving her in capable hands.” Because, truly, who would take care of Dahyun like Seungkwan would? Who would care for Dahyunie with hands so gentle, and a smile so kind, and eyes so soft like Seungkwan would? Seungkwan would sense, would know by instinct, what she would want. After all…

And then Seungkwan gives you a tight smile, much less kind than the one he gives to Dahyun, and waves you goodbye. You look away, unable to stare any longer, and make your way home with your little angel in your arms. 

_

School works out excellently for Dahyun-ah. It turns out Seugnkwan is not always there. There are two teachers working out alternately. So you can only catch Seungkwan again two days later, when you arrive a tad bit late and find Dahyun sitting on Seungkwan’s lap and the both of them playing with a playdough.

“I didn’t know you teach in this school, Seungkwan.” You say when he comes to hand your child to you. He doesn’t meet your eyes, still distracted with scratching off the playdough from Dahyun’s fingers. “I wouldn’t have come here if I’d known,” you add softly and he looks up. It’s true, but it’s not something you necessarily regret. 

“Does it matter?”

You keep the eye contact, and whisper, “It does.” Seungkwan turns away, clearly not intent on melting ice so quickly. “Seungkwan-ah, it’s not what you think it is!” 

He turns back ever so slightly. “Has it ever been what I’ve thought it is?”

Right then, Dahyun pokes your shoulder and yawns, indicating how sleepy she is. It’s time to go home. 

_

“Eomma!” Dahyun asks you as soon as you reach the creche. Today you’re on time, so it’s still crowded with other kids and their parents who’ve come to pick them up. You bend down and kiss Dahyun on her cheek. “Aww my baby.” She kisses you back, “Eomma I had a question!” You nod, fixing her shoes on her feet. “Why does my name start with Y/L/N and not Lee like Appa’s? All my friends at the creche have their names starting with their Appa’s family name.” Oh god. She’s about to find- she knows, she knows, she’s- she’s angry at you for hiding it- 

“Dahyunie, I’m sorry I-”

“Huh? Why’re you saying sorry, Eomma?” She looks genuinely confused and you reconsider for a second. Was it an innocent question or-”

“You look like you’re about to cry.” 

In your mess, you haven’t even noticed when the crowds have started to clear up and Seungkwan has crouched down next to you, holding a small cup of water. You stare at him, his big, beautiful, brown eyes, and you take the cup slowly. 

Dahyun smiles at her teacher, and you remember how Seungkwan was so intent on not conversing with you the last time you tried to talk to him. So you’ve made up your mind. If he wants to keep his distance, you will too. He wasn’t in the plan, anyway. But then Seungkwan asks, “I want to know too. Why does she not have her father’s family name?” You realise then, just how close he is to you. Your conversation is happening in it’s own bubble, and the rest of the world won’t even be able to hear anything. The pink from Dahyun’s dress reflects on Seungkwan’s face, giving it a more bubblegum glow than usual. He keeps his eyes on yours, and you feel obligated to answer.

“That’s because… Appa isn’t family anymore. Ever since I left Gwangju.”

That’s the most sugar-coated way you can explain it to Dahyun, who seems to get it nevertheless. She nods and explains to Seungkwan- “Eomma and Appa don’t talk to each other anymore. That’s why we’re here in Seoul. It’s already been three months.” You know she’s starting to forget her father’s voice, she told you once in the warm moments before sleep. You’d cried in the bathroom that night, feeling terrible and only calming down once you reminded yourself that it was your only choice. 

Seungkwan keeps looking at you. There’s something in his eyes, as his eyes go from your eyes, to your lips and then fall to your hand where he notices the absence of a wedding ring. Maybe it is curiosity, you wonder. But he also doesn’t ask anything else in front of Dahyun, and you’re thankful. 

“Your daughter is lovely.” 

You bite your lip to stop yourself from correcting him. “She is. Just turned four.” His eyes become curious again, but then he blinks and looks at Dahyun. “I was wondering if you’d enrolled her into any sports classes? I think she’d enjoy them, because she’s an active child.” 

You nod, “I did consider. I didn’t know which classes were good in Seoul so I’d thought I’d wait another year before enrolling her to ensure she settles down well…”

“Oh. That’s your call, I guess. But Dahyun seems to be settling down well enough. If you want… distractions, say… then a sport activity would be great.” 

“You’re right. I’ll check it out for sure. If you had any suggestions…”

“There’s a badminton coaching centre nearby. Perhaps you could check them out.”

“Thank you. I will. Thank you so much.” Seungkwan nods once at you, eyes lingering, before he waves sweetly at Dahyun and takes his leave. 

That night, your subconscious plays tricks on you. It floods your dreams with memories, leaving you sweaty and squirmy at night, even as the air conditioner blasts cool air into the room. Memories you thought you’d forgotten. Memories of a certain boy running laps in the college volleyball field during practice and you sitting in the corner of the ground, finishing your homework. Memories of that boy running to you during the ten minute break, sipping an energy drink from his sipper and kissing you in the spot of shade you’ve been sitting in, his mouth tasting like the orange flavour of the drink. Memories of you giggling, because his sweat is rubbing on your arms and he’s so gross, but you still can’t stop yourself from hugging him close for the rest of the short break. Memories of him promising to convince Coach to let him go fast because he wants to walk you home because it’s so unsafe to walk alone in the evening. Memories of Seungkwan giving you a last peck on your lips before jogging back to the grounds, both his and your cheeks smudged with sunshine and affection, eyes warm with the power of love, and hearts pure without any worry of life. 

_

“Hello?” Your voice is desperate as you wait for the person on the other side of the line to answer. This is the first time you’re calling the creche, as your boss had suddenly decided you need to finish a task before leaving, even if it’s raining cats and dogs outside, even if you have a daughter who’s waiting for you at a creche, even if it’ll be totally fine to finish the task at home and submit it later. Consequently, you got out of work late and the bus is stuck in a road full of traffic due to the terrible weather and you’re already half an hour late to Dahyun’s creche’s closing time. 

“Yes, this is Sebong Creche. I’m speaking to?”

“Oh, I’m so sorry, this is Dahyun’s mom-”

“Y/N?” It’s Seungkwan. He must be able to hear the way your voice is cracking with panic. It’s odd to introduce yourself as Dahyun’s mom to Seungkwan but that’s the way it is now. 

“I’m so sorry, I really am-”

“Calm down, please. Tell me what’s happening.”

“I… I got stuck at work… and I’m running late. I’m sorry for all this inconvenience-”

“Y/N, shh. Stop apologising and talk to me. Where are you now?”

“Umm, I’m still at my office. Please leave her near a guard or someone, Seungkwan, and I can pick her up in a short while! I’m trying to get out of her as soon as-”

“I can take her to your home.”

“Oh but-”

“Dahyun’s told me that you live in the neighbourhood right next to the school. I can walk her till there. She has a spare key, yes? She can get in.”

“But it’s raining!”

“And we have raincoats.”

“I don’t want to impose on you, honestly. You could just leave her-”

“And let her be alone? Y/N, you’re out of your mind.”

“But I don’t want to trouble you, Seungkwan-ah.”

“Do you not trust me?” You pause. You do trust him. There is nobody else you would trust more with your daughter. Fuck it. 

“I do trust you.”

“Then finish your work and come home safely. Dahyunie and I will head to your home.”

It’s about two hours later that you are able to reach home, only to find Seungkwan and Dahyun both giggling away at something he’s showing to her on his phone. They’re sitting at the island in the kitchen, and you notice the bottle of milkshake that had been stored in the fridge for Dahyun is now empty next to her. When you enter, they notice you and Dahyun immediately squeals out in joy. She gets off the high chair she was sitting in and comes running to you and you immediately pick her up in your arms. Something unfamiliar and beautiful blooms in your mind, but it’s immediately clouded down by a sadness which you don’t understand. 

_

When Dahyun falls asleep after you feed her dinner which you whip up quickly, Seungkwan’s still sitting in your kitchen, eating the rice and chicken you’ve made. 

“You still cook well, Y/N.”

You’re sitting across from him, and you pick up another piece of chicken and put it on his plate. “I’m glad you still like it.”

Oh god. He’s too close for confort. He’s right here, in your house, eating dinner you’ve made, after looking after your child for two whole hours while you were stuck at work. 

Is this what life would’ve turned out to be had you not left him four years back?

It seems that he’s thinking the same thing too, because he asks you, “Did you get the job you were studying for?”

“Yeah. I did. I am an actuary now.”

He smiles, digging into his food again, scrunching up his face as he chews it all down. 

“And you? I didn’t think you’d ever planned to become a teacher.”

“I didn’t. Someone told me something about volleyball being an unstable career. And I thought maybe I should switch.”

You sigh. He says it so normally, even when simply hearing it breaks your heart. You stop yourself from crying, because you know it’ll just be more pathetic. You won’t be able to explain to him why you’re crying. You won’t be able to explain why your heart aches everytime you see them together. You’ve spent many a night awake, wondering what would happen if your secret gets out. It’s so cruel that fate has landed you back into the proximity of the one man you had never imagined you would see again. And sometimes you hope a silver lining may emerge from this all, but it’s a faint hope. A daydream you don’t think you can afford to dream at this juncture of life. 

“I did get her into badminton like you said. She’s a natural, the teacher said.” As expected. Seungkwan smiles proudly, and you nearly tear up. He doesn’t even know what he’s doing to you. “I hope you don’t stop her from playing even when she grows up.” He says quietly, picking up his plate and walking towards the sink. You shrink further into your seat. 

“You know it wasn’t me.”

“No, but you might have the same views as your mother.”

“You should know I don’t. There’s a reason why Sehun Oppa and I are divorced now.”

He puts the plate in the sink and turns around to look at you. “I’m sorry to hear that.” You walk towards him and stand next to him as you start the tap to wash the dishes. “I’ll do that,” he offers, but you swat his hand away. “It’s my house. You’re my guest.” “It’s a quaint house. Very you.” “Is it? I didn’t have enough time to decorate it.” “I think it’s enough- sparse but not too empty. There is room for more, better now that she’s out of her clumsy phase.” “Hmm, what would you add?” “I don’t know, let me see.” He leans against the kitchen counter, the dim lights casting a beautiful shadow under his eyelashes which make his high cheekbones look so delicate. “I’d add a standing lamp in that corner, next to the couch. And perhaps a rug in front of the couch. Better for Dahyun than sitting on the cold wood floor. And I’d- Oh sorry. I’m saying too much.” “No, really. Your ideas are helpful. I haven’t thought much about all this but when you say it, I can picture it.” You look up and smile at him, his head tilted down as he looks at you intensely. “And perhaps a photo frame on the wall between the kitchen and the living space. Those new trendy collage ones. And, also a…”

Oh god. He’s making it so hard for you to not lean in and press a kiss to his cheek right now. He’s making it so hard for you to tell him everything- from the beginning, the entire truth. 

“Do you want dessert? I have chocolate ice cream.” You know he can’t turn down ice cream. So you just laugh when you see his hesitant smile turn into a shy smile, and you ask him to sit at the couch. When you take out two scoops for each of you and take it to the couch, he shifts to the opposite end of the couch to make room for you. 

“I don’t know if it’s my place to ask you, but have you told Dahyun about the… divorce?”

You sigh, “No. I haven’t. I’m just hoping that she’ll eventually forget about him quickly… she is young, after all.” 

“Won’t he want to meet her?”

“No, we’ve completely cut ties. It was the only option- I had to move on totally. And he didn’t want to keep any link either.” 

His eyebrows furrow, and you can see the questions in his eyes. You don’t want to say anything because you don’t want to appear like a damsel in distress, but you also don’t want to worry him. 

“He wasn’t abusive or anything. We just realised that it was a marriage in futility. Divorce was a relief to both of us.”

Surprisingly, it doesn’t reduce the questions in his eyes. But he doesn’t ask anything, and you don’t elaborate. You’ve overshared enough. 

“I just want to thank you again, Seungkwan-ah. For taking care of Dahyun and bringing her to my place. You know as a mother I am incredibly grateful.”

“Just because we’re exes doesn’t mean I won’t take care of your daughter, Y/N-ah,” he chuckles bitterly. “She’s like my own, and I would do it for anyone else. It is my job, and you know it is my nature.” 

You do. It feels like whiplash to hear that he would indeed do the exact same thing for anyone else too, it feels like a gash from a knife slashed across your chest. You choke, but you muffle it as a laugh. “I know it is your nature. But I still want to thank you, nonetheless.”

He smiles. “Thanks for the ice cream. I’ll not be a bother to you anymore now.”

“You could never be a bother, Kwan-ah.” He doesn’t say anything and simply takes your leave. It’s a night that feels bittersweet to you. While it’s a nice feeling to be basked in Seungkwan’s warmth again, it feels cruel that you’ll never truly enjoy his affection, or even his friendship.

_

The ice does break after that day. Seungkwan gives you smiles when you go to pick up Dahyun, and that initial tenseness is definitely gone. But you don’t push it too much. You don’t want to push the status quo because you’re afraid it’ll all be gone again. You’re afraid you won’t be able to protect yourself and your happiness once again because of your own mistakes. You’ve done it once before, and it’s not ended pretty. You can’t afford to repeat errors. 

“You must cut off ties with him right away, Y/N. Or else you’ll never see me or your father again.” Your mother’s voice booms through the room, muffling the sounds of your tears as you beg at her feet. Your father stands on the other side, looking outside the window, in that unfeeling, emotionless attitude you have always seen him wear. 

“But why, Eomma! What harm has Seungkwan done to you or me or anyone at all?”

“That boy is a gold-digger! He’s after your money. He knows very well he’ll get nowhere with volleyball. A sport should remain a hobby, but I doubt a middle class doofus like him would ever have the brains to even make a decent livi-”

“Oh you’re so wrong, Eomma! How can you say such things about him when you don’t even know him?”

“That’s enough. I know enough, Y/N. And I know he is not the man you ought to be spending your life with. He will not make you happy.” Your mother stands up from her seat and walks away, carelessly pushing you aside on her way. She would trample you down and walk over you like an ant even if you’d laid down at her feet. 

Honestly, what had you ever expected from your parents when you’d told them on the day of your graduation that you had a boyfriend? You had tried to explain how wonderful Seungkwan was, but they had turned a deaf ear and insisted you cut off all relations with him. With college over, you could do nothing to stop their plans- they took away your old phone, gave you a new contact number with which you could neither contact Seungkwan nor your friends, and didn’t allow you to leave the house. It was terrible- a true prison. So when your mother had offered you one chance to leave this prison- by marrying Sehun, you’d taken it. You’d taken it because you had known it would be drastically better than living cooped up in this mess forever- your heart aching, your mind helpless and your body tired. 

Even after moving to Gwangju and starting a new life with Sehun didn’t take away the emptiness you felt in your soul. But you, like an utter coward, had resigned to this fate and accepted married life with Sehun with open arms, ready to forget about your cherished past, about Seungkwan and all that you had loved earlier. And Sehun charmed you so neatly- with gifts, affection and everything you wanted. It was so different from the manner in which Seungkwan had loved you- while he’d been tender, always asking you before doing anything, never discouraging and always supporting in the background, Sehun was more active, more aggressive in the way he made you feel special. He would often take you on these whirlwind date nights- where he would make love to you under the stars in entire picnic spots he would book for you, where you drove for miles away from the city and spent the weekend in tea plantations, where you didn’t even have to ask and he would drop the world at your feet. It was a new sort of heaven, a rush of adrenaline you had never experienced before. Not with your parents- who had never treated you with any affection. Not with Seungkwan- who’d been equally giving, but shy, passive and so soft in his love. And this rush of adrenaline blew you off your feet. 

Until the news arrived. 

One month into this new marriage, you’d found out, only by accident, that you were pregnant. Had been pregnant for an entire month. Sehun was, of course, overjoyed. You’d asked the doctor to not tell him the exact duration of your pregnancy, because of course, you knew that it wasn’t possible that the child growing inside you had been conceived with Sehun at least a week before your wedding. 

That really broke you out of the haze your new marriage had trapped you in. Guilt and sadness tore into your newly patched up heart and reminded you of the boy you’d left behind at home, without even a message of where you were going. God knows how worried he may have been for you. Instead of considering him even once, you’d been swayed away by the pleasures of married life like a fool, that too, with a man you knew no more than a mere family friend, with a man whom, honestly, you did not love, with a man who had been planted in your life by your parents to distract you away from Seungkwan. 

Oh god. 

Your parents had won, and you’d lost.

And that broke you down. No matter how hard Sehun tried, he could not get your spirit back into the relationship- and you knew that this was the end of your marriage. After that, everything was just hollow clockwork, living with a stranger who slept in your bed, ate on the same dining table, and resided under the same roof as yours. You had become reckless. Under the added influence of hormones, you let yourself get aloof from everyone and everything, choosing to bury yourself in your self-pity and detaching yourself from society. 

And then it was only Dahyun who made you smile again. 

Little Dahyun who became the light of your life. Your reason to live again, your reason to find meaning and joy again. Because she was a part of you. And because she was a part of Seungkwan.  So you’d named her accordingly. Your little bundle of sunshine. 

Oh boy, did she look like her father. Of course, Sehun never found out. He was extremely caring towards Dahyun, ever a doting father, just as giving and aggressive about his love as he had been as a husband. It was a miracle that Dahyun was born slightly later than nine months- never causing any suspicion to rise in his mind at all. And it broke your heart a little bit, but then you remembered that Sehun was never on your side, really. For all you knew, perhaps he’d just been instructed by your parents to make you feel so loved that it would make you forget about Seungkwan. And he’d definitely succeeded. Almost. 

Eventually, you became less of a wreck and more normal. Mostly because of Dahyun and how you wanted to be the best mother ever for her. But also because you realised that this was not worth giving up all your happiness for. So you went back to the world- socialising, finding a job, and doing everything you could to settle down into this life in your new home. But it never really became your home. At the end of the day, when you’d lie down in your bed with Dahyun cradled in your arms, you’d still have that empty feeling somewhere inside, wanting more from life. But obviously, you never dared to tell anyone the truth. You don’t have a way out, so it was best to fit in, until opportunity arose.

_

“Eomma, Seungkwan Ssaem said yes!” Dahyun’s shrill voice greets you when you arrive at the creche. “Yes to what, sweetie?” “To my birthday, of course!” She’s snugly sitting on Seungkwan’s shoulders, and it strikes you in full force, just how much she resembles her father. The large boba brown eyes, crinkled at the edges, the bangs slipping back to reveal an elegant forehead with the tiny nose and small, rosy lips, that highlight the high cheekbones and the full, plump cheeks you so adore. It’s a wonder no one has noticed it before. And you dearly hope it remains like that.

“Oh, you invited him, did you now?” You carefully ask, as Seungkwan lets Dahyun climb off his back and towards the shoe rack. “Her birthday is this Sunday. Of course, I won’t expect you to attend. She’s a child… she doesn’t know what she’s doing. She just wants to invite everyone she likes to her party, I guess.”

“It’s an honour to be liked by someone as fascinating as Dahyun-ah, Y/N. It’s hurtful that you don’t expect me to be at her party on her special invitation.” He smiles, that gentle, indulging smile of his which he uses whenever he’s teasing you, and you know it’s coming but you always get so riled up by his teasing. 

“No! I didn’t mean it like that… oh god. I haven’t gotten better with words with time, have I?”

Seungkwan’s smile becomes wider. 

“You haven’t changed at all.”

_

You remember the night of Dahyun’s third birthday party in Gwangju. Sehun had organised the most lavish party for her, complete with balloons of every colour and inviting nearly all her classmates at her school. Dahyun, ever the extrovert, had been so happy that night. 

But that was the night everything changed. 

Sehun takes you into a room, away from the crowds of the party, and you ask him, confused, “What’s going on?”

“You know I went to the hospital today with Dahyun to get her regular checkup from her paediatrician.” 

“I do know, yes. What about it?”

“Guess what he said. He said, among other things, Dahyun was late-born child. She was born ten months after she was conceived, not nine months.”

You drop the glass you were holding in your hand, and you feel like you can’t breathe.

“Oppa, I can explain.”

“There’s nothing to explain. She isn’t mine, is she?”

You heave a breath as you try to calculate what his next step might be. You try to calculate whether offense or defense should be your correct strategy here, because truly you have nothing to lose, except your daughter. If Sehun kicks you out and makes a show in front of your parents, you’ll run away so far that they’ll never be able to track you. 

But he doesn’t give you a chance to speak. 

“We were never really married, were we?” His hand shakes as he comes to cup your cheek. “Let’s not stay together any longer. Let’s get divorced, hmm?”

You breathe out a sigh of relief. Out of every possible answer that he could’ve given, this is undoubtedly the best, and the safest, one. 

“Yes, let’s do that, Sehun. Let’s not pretend we love each other anymore.”

_

Tonight, you’ve tried to give her a little bit of that splendour Sehun had given her while you both had been in Gwangju. You’ve baked her a cake with three types of chocolate, invited as many of her friends from school as she’d ever mentioned in her stories about school, and cooked tteokbokki and tangsuyuk, her favourite dishes, for the entire group at the party. 

But then Seungkwan arrives. 

Seeing him reminds you of his words at the creche where you last saw him, which had given you butterflies for the past few nights. He’d taken you back to the giggling mess you’d been at the freshman’s welcome party when Seungkwan had complimented your dress that you’d tailored for yourself and taken away your heart. Of course, it had taken many more months for you to gather the courage to even speak to him, and then more months for you both to officially begin dating, but you’d known on that night of the welcome party that Boo Seungkwan would always be your weakness. 

And you were right. His words have lingered in your mind these last few days, and now that he’s arrived at Dahyun’s party with another teacher from the school who Dahyun had specially invited, wearing a black shirt and black trousers, his hair gelled up and a bit of lip balm on his lips, he’s still giving you butterflies. 

“Thank you for coming really! Dahyun will be so overjoyed. She’s just in the other room with all the friends, they’re playing with her toys.”

“Oh it’s nothing at all. We just dropped by because we love Dahyun so much, and because hyung was so insistent,” the other teacher, Chan, says. “We haven’t met each other yet, have we?” “No, I’m afraid not. But I have heard so much about your dance classes from Dahyunie. She’s really big on sports and dancing, such an active child. A complete opposite from me, so it’s a little hard for me to understand.” You smile as you hand them both a piece of the birthday cake.

“Oh, she must’ve taken after her dad.” Chan says with a smile, unknowingly speaking the truth. 

“You’re right. She has.”

“This tastes amazing, Y/N-ah.” Seungkwan quietly says as he eats his cake. 

“Oh. I’m glad. I made it for her. Chocolate is her favourite flavour.” 

“Would it be too much for ask for another slice?” Chan says with a giggle, and you cry out, “Of course not! I’m a bad host for not offering you anyway. I’m sorry, here you go.”

“So, you and hyung know each other from college, I heard.”

Seungkwan’s sharp breath can be heard and you’re instantly on the edge. “Yes. We… were friends.” We were in love. “Your hyung wanted to become a volleyball star at that time, Chan-ssi.” I stole his dream from him. “Oh really? I never knew you played it so seriously, hyung! Y/N-ssi, did you also play?” “Oh no. Like I said, I was never into sports.” 

“No.” You almost miss Seungkwan’s voice. “Your parents never encouraged you to try out sports.” Chan looks at him puzzled, and he continues, “It’s important for parents to let children experiment with different things as a child to let them make their own choices. I hope you won’t make the same mistakes your parents made, Y/N-ah.” 

You’re silent for a second before replying, “I’m here because I’m not going to make the same mistakes, Seungkwan. But it’s fair for you to not trust me to be a good mother.”

“I never said that,” his eyes soften. “I’ve always known you’d be the best mother, Y/N-ah. And I can see that in the way Dahyun’s been brought up.”

In that moment with electricity charged between your gazes, you’ve both forgotten about Chan sitting there right in between you two. There’s so much going unsaid, so much you can’t even explain, so much you don’t even want to admit to yourself. 

“Chan Ssaem! Seungkwan Ssaem! You came!” Dahyun bursts in suddenly, and behind her are a flurry of other tiny kids from her class. They all cheer very loudly on seeing their teachers, quite shocked to see them outside class. Seungkwan gives her a gift- it’s a set of jigsaw puzzles, and Chan places a faux crown on her head as he gives her a book. The tensions dissolve, and you’re glad. 

Chan leaves after a short while, but on your (and Dahyun’s) request, Seungkwan stays. He stays long enough to see all the kids leave one by one, and Dahyun becoming tired from all that playing and chattering. So after you’ve cleaned up the house from the mess of the party, grateful that your daughter enjoyed so much but also overstimulated from it all, you almost cry when you see Seungkwan sitting on the couch with Dahyun asleep in his lap, his head bent as he scrolls through his phone. You wonder, if in another life, in another world, in another universe, this would be your life and not a mirage you yearned for. 

But what if you were brave? What if you could be ambitious and try to have it all in this life itself?

“Ice cream for dessert.” You hand the bowl to Seungkwan as you sit on the other side of the sofa. You softly take Dahyun and twist her into your lap, and she instantly wraps herself around you as she finds your warmth. You can’t help but kiss her forehead fondly, mirroring the expression Seungkwan wears right now. 

“You’ve really brought her up so well. She’s got all your good genes.”

“And yours.”

Seungkwan’s hand stills mid-air when he was trying to scoop into the ice cream. 

“What did you say?”

“Don’t tell me you’ve never wondered. She is four years old, and she looks remarkably like you. The similarities are obvious.”

“But I… I didn’t dare to- no! You’re lying.” Seungkwan’s voice becomes a harsh whisper as he stares at you incredulously. You match his gaze, letting down your shield. “I’m not.” He continues to stare at you. Then he suddenly drops to his knees near your feet and says, “Y/N. Don’t be cruel to me anymore. You can’t joke about-” “I’m not joking, Seungkwan, why won’t you believe me?” “Because I don’t want to believe and become hopeful only to lose it all again!” You’re both nearly shouting but in loud whispers, trying to not wake up Dahyun, who’s surprisingly, still peacefully snoring away. 

You stand up and pull Seungkwan to his feet. Then you drag him to the bedroom and gently close the door. 

“You can test it. I’m not lying.” You softly grab his wrist, but he shivers. “You’re going to make me mad, Y/N. How is this possible? Why did you not tell me? Why did you leave me then?” He finally asks, his voice hoarse with emotion. 

“Do you really not know?”

“No… I do. You sent that letter.”

“I didn’t. I found out years later about it. My mother sent it. You think I’d break up with you over a typed letter?”

“So? What was it for?”

“They didn’t let me out of the house. Wouldn’t let me meet you. Or anyone. The only way to get out of that hell was to marry Sehun.”

“I read about the wedding in the local newspaper.” He shakes his head bitterly. “But he was truly your match- in status, and in wealth.”

“You know I’ve never cared for anything like that.” You tug at his wrist, and he looks up at you. 

“Is that why you left him? Because of Dahyun? But why so late then?”

“I was waiting to gather enough finances. Plus, he didn’t even suspect anything until six months ago. Perfectly timed, coincidentally, for my savings to come up to a good amount for me to confidently move out.”

He shakes his head vigorously, his eyes wide. “No, no… you’re not making sense. Can you start from the beginning?”

So you do. You tell him everything, from the beginning. By the end of it, he’s sitting on your bed, next to you, as you both stare at your feet. It feels so relieving and so freeing to tell him, someone apart from yourself the whole truth. It’s like a weight lifted off your chest and a headache that dissipates into thin air. You slouch back and look at Seungkwan, who’s still looking like he’s in shock. 

After a solid ten minutes, he says, “Why didn’t you tell me before, Y/N?”

“I… I don’t know. I didn’t know how you’d react, I didn’t know if you’d accept us. I didn’t know what would happen if somehow the truth reached my parents. I was obsessed with protecting my daughter, first, you see.”

“I do see. But I… it still hurts that you didn’t trust me with it.”

“But it would be fair for you… back then, and even now, to not want us in your life. To remain strangers forever. I- I would understand. You have every right to be angry at me-”

“I’d think you would know me better than this, Y/N-ah. You would know that no matter how many times you leave me, if you ever want to come back I would open my arms wide and fall to your feet to let me love you again.”

A stray tear escapes your eyes. It’s a stab to your chest, and you extend a hand slowly to touch Seungkwan’s hands which lie in his lap. He doesn’t say a word, only opens his fingers to capture your hand in his and tightly seals the clasp. It’s so warm, his hands. The touch is remarkably familiar. 

“What do you want, Seungkwan-ah? I’ve given it all up to you. I’ll take whatever you give me.”

He just looks up at you, his hand still holding on to yours. He doesn’t say a word, but then he gently leans in. You think he’s going to whisper something, but then he places a small kiss on your lips. It’s a peck, no more, but it sends your body in overdrive. Suddenly, you’re floating and drowning all at the same time. “She has your hair,” he says, his breath mingling into yours as his lips move just a few inches away from you, eyes still locked. You giggle. It’s true- Dahyun’s hair is just the same as yours, but the rest of her completely looks like him, you know. “I can’t… I can’t believe it that you’re here, Kwan-ah.” “Neither can I. When you arrived at the creche that day, I thought I was hallucinating. Even more when I saw your little girl sitting in your arms.” “Our little girl. We made her.” You can see the way Seungkwan’s entire face turns red. “Fuck, Y/N. How can you say it so easily?” “Because I’ve had four years to adjust to it. I’m sorry if I’ve bombed you with too much information too fast.” “No kidding. It felt like that climax scene from a romcom movie except this is real life, it was my life.” “Don’t be dramatic. Why did you kiss me?” “Because I missed you?” And it’s your turn to become red with embarrassment. Some part of you feels overjoyed, but still so guilty. So you move away from him, taking away from your hand from his grip and turning your entire body away. 

“Y/N?”

“I’m sorry, Kwan-ah. I’ve hurt you so much already. You shouldn’t forgive me so easily.”

He softly grips your shoulders and turns you to face him. “I have been hurt by your actions, it’s true. You left me in an abyss from which only I know how I escaped. But it still didn’t feel like you. After all the love you gave me, how could you just run away from me by leaving that letter and marry someone else? I couldn’t believe that you could be so cruel, so deceiving. But everything around me told me I was wrong. Your marriage announcement, the way you didn’t call me or even contact me, or in fact, any of our college friends, everything was eventually proving to me that you were gone forever from my life.”

More tears flood down your cheeks. His grip tightens, and he continues. “But you’ve explained the truth to me, and now I can’t help but forgive you. Because I know I was right. All along, in my heart, I knew it and I was right. And now you’re here. I would be a fool to let you go again.” 

“But-”

“There’s no buts. I’m not looking back.”

And he hugs you, his warmth engulfing your entire body as you cling to him. He smells sweet, like he did all those years ago, and you hold him close, so close that you can’t breathe but you can’t let go either. 

“Baby? I can’t breathe.” Seungkwan whispers in your ears, and you shiver in the shock of hearing the pet name. “I’m sorry, I’ll-”

“No, don’t be sorry. Let’s get Dahyunie into bed, hmm? Do you sleep with her?”

“I do. This is our bedroom.”

“Then let’s get her to bed.”

“Will you stay?”

“Hmm?” Seungkwan looks at you, his eyes wet but fond, as he walks towards the door to pick up Dahyun where she’s sleeping on the couch. 

“Stay with us?”

“Are you going to tell Dahyun?”

“What do you say?”

“It’s your call. You’re her mother.”

“And you’re her father,” you whisper as you walk towards him and sling your hands around his neck. 

“God, don’t say it so casually. It hasn’t sunk in yet.”

You lean in and kiss him on his cheek. “I was thinking- maybe if she woke up and found her favourite Ssaem cuddling her, would she be pleasantly surprised?”

“What if she gets creeped out?”

“Oh god. I think Dahyun loves you enough to not be creeped out by it. At most, she’d think we’re dating now.”

“We’re not?”

“Are we?” 

He kisses you softly on your cheek, an open-mouthed kiss that leaves your skin wet. “I love you Y/N. I never stopped loving you. Will you have me back again in your life?”

You hug him tightly again, your nerves tingling with joy. “Oh god, I love you too, Seungkwan-ah. I’ll love you better this time.”

“Shh, darling. Let’s get our little baby to sleep now, hmm?”

You look at him, and you see stars. It’s a miracle, nothing short of that. But he’s yours. Again. 

“Shall we change her last name to Boo now?”

“Oh dear. Boo Dahyun?”

“It sounds so cute!”

“Now stop squealing or I can’t open the door otherwise she’ll wake up!” 

“Sorry, I’ll be quiet, baby.” 

He smiles widely and kisses you again, full on your mouth, “I promise, I’ll never let you go. Nor Dahyunie. I love you so much.”

a/n: read the stories of the other three boys here! would love to hear your feedback!

[winteringdream]

&team reacting to you being scared of thunder

kei

“ah, it’s raining.” k notices, pulling out the clear umbrella out of his bag. you sigh of relief, happy he didn’t see you flinch. k pulls you in, the umbrella shielding both of you from the rain.

once again, thunder sounds from the sky, and this time it’s louder. k turns to you, a little confused. but, when he sees you, with your hands covering your ears, his look immediately softens.

“hey, are you okay?” you can only nod to reply. his arm wraps around your shoulder, pulling you even closer. quickly bringing you back home.

fuma

”are you okay?” fuma shouts from the kitchen. “i heard you yell.”

“come here please, fuma. i’m scared.” within seconds he is next to you, totally abandoning the snacks he was about to get.

he takes the blankets off of the couch and puts them on you. he then envelopes you in a hug, his arms around you making you feel safe.

ej

“it’s getting darker, we should head back to the dorms.” ej says as he closes his laptop. “we can finish this another time.”

you agree with him, packing your stuff into your bag. worriedly, you look outside, seeing the rain fall.

“are you ready?” ej asks, standing at the door, ready to leave. when he pushes the door open, thunder claps loudly, making you take a step back.

“what’s the matter?”

“i’m scared of thunder.” you can see ej’s mouth form an “o”. all the gears in his head turning. “you want my headphones? i’ll shield you from the rain while we run back.”

nicholas

it wasn’t the first time you saw nicholas at the bus stop, but the two of you never really exchanged more than 20 words to eachother.

“looks like it’s going to storm.” nicholas comments, looking up at the sky.

“yeah.” you gulp, hoping your fear wasn’t too obvious. nicholas, sensing something is off, turns to you. your hands are fiddling with the hanger on your bag, and your leg is shaking up and down.

“something wrong?”

“just a little scared.” just as you finish your sentence thunder strikes, making you yelp all of the sudden.

“here.” nicholas approaches you, and holds out his hand. “hold my hand.”

he gently squeezes your hand when you flinch, and makes sure to look out for you.

yuma

yuma has been searching for you ever since he came home. he calls out your name but he cant seem to find you.

he pulls open the closet, not expecting to find you in there. but, to his surprise, you are curled up in the closet, shivering and crying.

“what’s the matter? what happened? did someone break in?”

you shake your head and tell him it’s the thunder.

“you scared me.” yuma pouts, lifting you out of the closet. “let’s go to bed and close the windows. do you need something else? stuffed animal? hug? earplugs?”

jo

“jo, i know it’s late but if you hear this, please can you come over?” you speak into your phone when the call goes to voicemail. your hands tremble when you put down the phone and you pull the blanket over your head to shield you from the sound.

you don’t expect him to reply, but he does. within a few minutes he texts that he is on the way.

you fall into his arms when you open the door, heart beating loudly in your chest.

“are you alright?” he whispers, patting your head. “i brought earplugs and we can watch the movie you like.”

”i’d like that.”

harua

“are you okay?” harua frantically exclaims as he runs around his bedroom. he hadn’t prepared anything to help you with your fear of thunder.

harua mentally scolds himself, wishing he had thought about it. but he didn’t really expect it to storm today.

“i’m alright, harua.”

“you’re clearly not! i’m such a bad boyfriend i should’ve looked at the weather app.” he continues to ramble on.

“harua.” you say, snapping him out of his thoughts. “just come and lay with me.”

“are you sure you don’t need anything else?”

“i only need you.”

taki

the moment you have been dreading arrived. school just ended and it was storming. your classmates storm out of the building in the hopes of getting home as soon as possible.

“are you not leaving?” taki questions, walking to your table. “weatherforecast says it’s only going to get worse.”

“i’m scared of-“ before you get to finish your sentence, thunder strikes, causing you to flinch and hide under the table with your hands covering your ears.

taki squats down to help you. he holds out his hand, and you take it.

“if you want to go with me, i’d be happy to walk home with you. would that help?” he suggests, as he shows you his umbrella.

“that’d be nice, yeah.” you mumble, cautious about thunder striking again.

“let’s go then. i’ll cover your ears for you.”

maki

your best friend since birth has teased you about your fear of thunder as long as you can remember.

you had expected today to be no different. the two of you are at an amusement park, in the line for some kind of scary ride.

“it’s going to storm, we should head inside after this.” you tell maki, who nods in agreement. he can tell that you’re getting anxious, but the wait shouldn’t take that long, right?

to both of your surprise, it starts thundering. your eyes widen and hold onto maki’s arm. he’d definitely would tease you about this.

“hey, you want to go inside?” he whispers in your ear. it catches you by surprise. he wasn’t teasing you about it.

instead, he takes out his airpods, handing one over to you. as he hits play, a familiar tune sounds in your ear.

you smile at him, and he smiles back. the dimples that you like so much appear on his face.

[the-kr8tor]

hiii, i've been thinking for Fluffy Friday - Hobie walking gn!reader to their bus stop after a concert and giving them his jacket

like it's late, and they're both tired from all the jumping in the pit and he's making sure they won't freeze on their way home. just Hobie being both punk and a gentleman <3

hope you're having a good day!!

Thank you for requesting! Hope you like it ❤️

Pairing: Hobie Brown x gn! Reader/ Spider-Punk x gn! Reader

Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, love struck Hobie, FLUFF

It's fluffy Friday!

ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

You're freezing your ass off waiting for the bus, you try to hide it from Hobie though; slyly rubbing your arms, trying to get rid of the goosebumps. You absolutely regret not bringing a thicker jacket with you. Your tired body doesn't help, legs tired from jumping up and down, cursing the government for taking out benches on bus stops.

Hobie stops mid sentence, too engrossed in the conversation, he just noticed how your lips slightly quiver in the cold, arms crossed on your chest, trying to act nonchalant.

"—You want my jacket?" Hobie's already taking off his leather jacket.

"No, you'll get cold" you try to stop him, hands on the leather, pushing it back towards him.

"I run warm, love. You need it more" He says softly as he drapes it over your shoulder, helping you put your arms inside the jacket. You don't protest more, savoring the warmth provided. Already giddy when you realize you smell like him now. "Better?" Hobie rubs your arms, adding extra warmth.

"Yeah, better. Thank you" you sigh into his touch, smile soft, eyes staring at him with so much fondness, you take his breath away. A lopsided smile appears on his lips, he's sure you're doing it on purpose just to see him all flustered.

He lets you win, chuckling as he hides his face on the crook of your neck, using the excuse that he's hugging you goodbye. You embrace him back, warming him up instantly.

"You're cold already" You whisper it to him like a secret, kneading the tired muscles on his back.

The bus arrives, saving Hobie from your horrid (affectionate) acts. The doors hisses open, you reluctantly let him go, Hobie holds you at arms length, cupping your face in his hand, admiring how the fluorescent lights from the bus highlights your face. He etches the memory deep inside his mind, memorizing how clouds puff out of your slightly parted lips, eyebrows relaxed, doe eyes gazing at him with longing.

You're not the only one who has that expression. Hobie mirrors yours, except for the content smile on his lips. The bus honks, ruining the moment.

"I've gotta go" you don't want to leave though, but your eyes are already protesting, lids growing heavy every minute.

Hobie scans the bus for any creeps that might cause you trouble. He finds none, only you and the bus driver will be inside.

"You sure you don't want me to come with you?" He asks with concern, it is really late for you to travel alone.

You slowly walk towards the bus, fingers laced with Hobie's. "You live on the other side of town" laughing, finally letting him go. You feel cold already. "I'll call you when I get home, okay?" Trying to reassure him.

"Yeah," he nods, watching you get on the bus. "Drive safely, mate" Hobie addresses the driver. The driver wordlessly gives him a nod.

Sitting down on the plastic seats, you watch as Hobie gets smaller and smaller as the bus drives away. Laying your head on the window, you smile at how much you had fun today, especially spending it with Hobie. Giddily wrapping his leather jacket closer to your torso. You've been dating him for a couple of months now, and you're loving every second of it. You probably look like a maniac to the bus driver, all smiley and giggling at nothing.

Distracted, your face almost hits the seat in front of you when the bus suddenly lurches to a stop. You look out of the window in confusion.

"Sorry 'bout that" Hobie's familiar voice talks to the driver. Are you that tired that you're suddenly hearing his voice? Or do you just fancy him that much?

Peeking down the aisle, sure enough you see Hobie sauntering over to you, a goofy smile on his face.

Your mouth agape, you fumble with your words. "What–how? You're–"

"I ran" He doesn't look like he ran to catch up with the bus, a running bus mind you. How in the world?–

Hobie gestures for the seat next to you, without warning, the bus suddenly moves again, you reach for his arms so he doesn't get thrown about. Guiding him down the seat, he gives you an appreciative smile.

"What are you doing here?" You ask, voice lowering so you don't anger the driver with the noise.

"I don't know, actually" he looked serious when he said those words.

You laugh from the belly, head thumping on his chest. He laughs a few seconds after you, finding your giggling contagious. His hands on the back of your neck, you feel how cold his palms are. "Oh I think I know" you say with a smirk, a hint of shyness peeking in.

"I'm not trying to sleep over at your place–"

"And here I thought you wanted me to make you a cup of tea" you warm his cold arms. "So this isn't a ruse to stay the night?"

"I think i just wanted to make sure you got home" he clears his throat, trying to sound nonchalant.

"All these spikes and you're actually a softie, huh?" You fix his windblown eyebrow. "How are you gonna get home now?"

"That's for me to figure out later" Hobie tilts his head, leaning to your touch.

"Okay," you lay your head on his shoulder. "Thank you for staying with me" holding his cold hand, you place a chaste kiss on his cheek.

"It's nothin'" He loops his arm over your shoulder. Cheek right next to your temple, Hobie practically melts. Comfortable in your arms, you feel the same, resting your eyes, squeezing his hand lightly.

You mentally scoff at the idea of letting Hobie walk in the dark especially in this temperature. You're already planning what tea to brew for him when you get home.

ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

Thank you for reading! Please consider reblogging if you enjoyed it ❤️

[gothlcsan]

RAILWAY TO HEAVEN 𝜗𝜚 YUTA NAKAMOTO

PAIRING sub!yuta dom!afab!reader

GENRE 18+ smut

SYNOPSIS exhibitionist Yuta who tries so hard not to get hard after work going home on the train. He can’t help it though when his dick accidentally rubs against someone’s ass or their body brushes against his

WORD COUNT 2031

WARNINGS dubious consent, cock slapping, exhibitionism, trains, fingering (pussy), guidance kink, virginity kink, loss of virginity, lib biting, teasing, hair pulling, safe sex !!!!

a/n pulled this from my ao3 account ,, i hope you enjoy it the same . ̫ . please consider liking, reblogging, and sending requests !!

You first meet Yuta on your way home after work, trying to hide your face as he stands in front of you, his knees hitting against yours as you’re sitting in a seat. It’s a warm summer day, fanning yourself with papers as you try to ignore the knees touching yours. The bus was crowded, which within itself isn’t out of the ordinary for a Monday evening, hardly any room to breathe let alone stand. This is quickly proven as the bus shakes, his body falling slightly forward, his clothed bulge centimeters from your face.You’re surprised at first but not entirely bothered by the accidental intrusion. He recognizes your shock, leaning back quickly, his face beyond red apologizing, but the growing bulge intrigues you. Tapping his thigh, he seems to ignore you, probably assuming you planned on yelling at him. You smile amused from having to tug on his pant leg to grab his attention, motioning him to bend down, his face bright red and starting to turn away. He was seemingly shy which made the chase even more thrilling for you.

“Don’t be shy, come here,” you say, smiling as he leans down. placing a hand dangerously close to his dick, giving him an innocent smile, watching him look around and squirm.

“What’s your name?”

He bites his lip, leaving you convinced he won’t say anything until a small voice comes from him, his legs practically trembling as you rub your hand up and down his thigh.

“Yuta..” he barely says over a whisper. Cooing at him for being so cute, watching him as he moves his hips, making his clothed dick rub against your hand. He apologizes profusely, going to move away but you’re quicker, grabbing onto his wrist and pulling him back, shooting him a faux glare. He blushes as you demand him to get off with you at your stop, whispering a faint, “good boy” into his ear as he helps you down onto the platform, walking alongside you to your apartment. The walk is quiet, keeping your hand in his to ensure that he doesn’t run away, reaching your apartment letting him inside first. He’s shy, awkwardly standing in your small living room, fingers playing with the hem of his shirt. He doesn’t know why he followed you home, questioning why he listened at all but he was so intrigued in your confidence he couldn’t help but listen. Yuta yelps in surprise, ripped from his thoughts, when you wrap your arms around his torso, undoing his belt and button to his work slacks. At first he tries to push you off, you only tightening your grip as you yank the pants to his ankles; his dick falling out instantly.

“You’re not wearing anything under there are you,” you fake gasp, giving his dick a tiny slap, it instantly hardens at the contact. He groans, shaking his head, already becoming compliant despite trying to fight it, kicking his legs. Unsurprisingly, he doesn’t last much longer as you start jerking him off, your other hand pinching and rolling his pretty nipples between your fingers, his cries and begs filling the room. The fight in him was lost in the pleasure of not caring anymore that he said no, now begging for more. Pressing a kiss on the side of his cheek, laughing sadistically as you spoke to him with a hint of taunting.

“See, it feels so good right? There was no need for you to struggle, hm?”

Yuta’s knees fold inward pressed together, slumping forward as he nods, inhaling sharply through his teeth as you yank his head back by his hair.

“I asked you a question.”

He trembles in your arms, finally managing a, “Yes Ma’am,” before he’s clinging to your arm for support, trying to not cum instantly. He seems to forget that he doesn’t know your name as he’s being dropped to the ground, looking up at you with tears in the corner of his eyes, biting down on his lip to hold them back. You squat down in front of him, placing his chin between your forefinger and thumb moving his face from side to side studying him. You hadn’t actually expected him to come this far with you, let alone get off the train, so this was an opportunity you weren’t letting go to waste. Using the hand on his chin, you lean forward and press a kiss to his lips, soft and faintly scented strawberry. He’s cuter than you imagined. This makes you feel excited, pushing him back to lay flat on his back, the heated flooring warm under your knees as you crawl on top of him to straddle his hips. Yuta’s eyes widen as you take your blouse off, lacey bra in full view for him, the top nearly spilling out.

“Have you ever touched a woman before,” you teased, grabbing his hands to place on your chest making him squeeze them. He shakes his head face so red in embarrassment you almost expected him to pass out, leaning down to kiss his cheek sweetly.

“That’s okay, baby, I’ll teach you.”

You move away from him, telling him to follow as you make your way into your bedroom from the small hallway. Yuta stands at the doorway for a few seconds before you scoff, motioning him to come inside, teasing him by saying you weren’t going to hurt him that badly; earning a squeak from him as he slips into the room. Despite him being tall he was so cute that you wanted to hide him from the world for only you to see. He’s slow at first to follow you to the bed, having to hold his hand to climb into it as you’re positioning yourself prompt against your pillows, telling him to come closer. Guiding his hand you show him how to undo your skirt, lifting your hips as he inches it down your legs and mindlessly discarded onto the floor. He looks at your matching panties before looking up asking for permission to touch, which you decide to grant him wanting to see what he had in mind. It’s obvious he’s a virgin but he’s naturally good with his hands, softly touching you through the thin lace fabric, making a wet patch form under his fingers.

“You want to fuck me, hm,” you asked as he moved your panties to the side, making him nod with a blush. Reaching into your nightstand you take out a condom and bottle of lube, telling him to stay still. You guide the condom onto him, his legs trembling from the sensation, you nearly wanted to almost rip the whole condom off, just let him breed you but it was too early for that, deciding to play it safe. Reaching for the lube you spread a generous amount, jerking him off so he’s nice and coated. Having him watch as you take your lube covered fingers, speeding yourself as you start slowly fingering yourself open to make it easier to take him, loving the way he was flushed red, his dick twitching at the sight. Yuta paying attention so attentively, his dick twitching with each wet squelch of your fingers delving deeper into you. Once you’ve decided you’re nicely prepped, you beckon him forward, removing your fingers with a light sigh.

“Be gentle, okay,” you tell him while helping guide him, the tip of his dick brushing up against your clit. This earns a moan from you, reaching down to guide him to your hole, groaning loudly as he manages to slip the tip in. It takes you a moment to regain your senses, telling him to slowly start pushing in and out, hooking your legs over his to keep him in place. Yuta’s pace is messy but slow, grabbing his hips to help pace him, making sure to remind him he’s such a good boy for learning. He thanks you, babbling how good it feels to be inside you, crying out when you bring him down slightly to lick and bite his nipples. Stopping for a second to process what you’re doing, Yuta regains his thrusts, moaning into your neck as you abuse his now swollen nipples. Each swipe of your tongue makes him moan in pleasure trying to not cum without your permission but he’s so close already, gripping the sheets next to your head as a way to ground himself. You trade your mouth for your fingers, flicking the wet buds as he continues to thrust into you, his pretty sounds louder every second you deny him of his orgasm. You’re selfish, wanting to hear Yuta’s cries and strained moans forever, tightening around him to remind him that he wasn’t allowed just yet; moving one hand to grip his arm.

You chase his lips to a kiss, moaning into each other’s mouths as you both reach your breaking points, the hand playing with his nipple encouraging him fuck into you faster; harder. His hands feel so godly touching your body, tangling in your hair as he kisses you, making your toes curl in excitement. The pleasure is too much for you to hold back much longer, your thighs red and sore from how hard he was slamming against them. He moans into your mouth when you beg him to cum, your own broken moans being swallowed by Yuta, cumming around him as he fills out the condom. Shakiky cupping his jaw in your hand you kiss him gently, his lips quivering as he pulls out, a proud smirk on your face when he moans loudly from you biting his bottom lip with a tug.

“ You’re such a good boy, hm, you did so good.”

Yuta shivers from the praise, thanking you alongside planting a small kiss against your lips. Staring up at him in awe of something in you making your stomach ignite with fire, he’s so pretty, so fuckable. Apologizing, you hook your legs around his, flipping him onto his back so you’re on top again, straddling him. He’s taken aback at first but accepts it once you start gyrating your hips against his semi hard dick. Hands running up your stomach to cup your breasts, you sigh as he squeezes them between his fingers, lifting your hips up to slide down onto Yuta’s dick. Lust takes over as you start lifting your hips up, slamming back down with a grunt, picking up pace eagerly. Mixture of moans and skin slapping against skin fills the room, Yuta’s hands spreading your ass as you ride him, saliva covered lips working in harmony. Both are spent, panting into each other's mouth but so drunk on one another you can’t stop, cumming for the second time as he rams into you ruthlessly. Yuta reaches his high, clinging to you as he cums, his twitching dick making you gasp, wanting this to never end. Placing a kiss on his nose, you smile, fixing the sweat matted hairs sticking to his forehead away from his face.

“What’s your name,” he asks, making you laugh realizing you never gave it to him, instead giving him two orgasms and losing his virginity. Telling him, he nods, saying it’s pretty but he’ll stick with ma’am in the bedroom earning a playful smack against his left pec. Convincing each other to get up and clean, you give him your number as he’s leaving, blushing happily as he leans down to kiss you. Bidding him a goodbye and closing the door to your apartment, you sprint to climb back into bed, kicking your feet as you inhale the smell of his cologne stuck in your pillowcases; thanking the unbearable crowded bus for bringing you two together. Throwing the pillow onto the ground as your phone goes off, giggling at the selfie Yuta took in the back of the taxi with a goodnight message attached with it. Yes, it had been decided, he would be stuck with you for life, wishing him goodnight before turning over to wrap yourself around a different pillow already missing his touch.

I’ll have him come over tomorrow, you tell yourself before nodding off, content and spent from your eventful evening.

[captainlondonman]

Workie Big Jim

WORKIE  BIG JIM to J-BOI

What the hell is going on outside the front door? James looked through the window and saw 2 young guys setting up bollards in a square on the pavement outside

‘I’ve not had any notifcation for works to be done.’

As he looked out there were two guys both in their 20.s in full Hi Viz gear wearing white helmets and orange kit. One had a really good bod and knew it wearing tight trousers so he showed off a tight arse. He had a tight fitting T shirt on showing the full 6 pack and protruding nipples, making sure his waistcoat was open for all to see. He was unshaven, a good dark stubble and tanned. One arm was full of tats and he had gold earrings in both ears and a ciggie droping down from his lips. As he turned so James could see his cock pushing out from the tight confines.  His head was shaved and gleaming.

Sex on legs but a mouthy son of a bitch by the look of things

The other guy was shorter and a good rugby build with hairy arms and shaved head. He was wearing dirty camos and high rigger boots. He kept wiping his nose on his cuffs. A dirty little bugger James thought

Even if James was annoyed at seeing them outside his house, he found his cock twitching at the sight of the lads.

Nothing to beat a dirty workie  he thought. Christ I don’t why but the sight of these dirty young guys in Hi Viz always gets me horny . I can’t stop dreaming of being a mucky workie and having a good fuck with these guys. As he stared at them so his hand went down to his dick and started rubbing . Shit I love Hi Viz gear he said as his cock started tenting big time in his trousers. Christ I have to have a wank and they wont be able to see me getting my rocks off.

With that he took his good 6 incher out with its thick head and started to rub himself. That cocky one really gets me so horny he said watching the young lad bend over showing the tight arse. What I would do with that he said but knowing full well he never would which made his excitement even more. His hand groped his dick and he slid his sweaty hand up and down his shaft faster and faster working his thick head wet with precum. Oh God I’m coming as he shoved his head back and his cum spurted all over the wall under the window.

James showered and washed off all the excess spunk that had run down his legs Time to get to work. As he walked out the cocky lad looked over at him and winked.

‘What are you guys doing right in front of my house.’

‘What the fuck does it look like. Digging a hole mate, electrical problems. Can you not see what it says on the back of my coat.’

‘I only asked’ James said

‘And I only told you’ was the reply.

‘Have you not any foreman’ asked James

‘Nope, he buggered off, its just Jake and I, ain’t it Jake?’

‘Sure thing, Wayne but we reckon we know what were doin’

‘I certainly hope so’ James said somewhat arrogantly

‘Christ man can you not take a joke. A bit strung up ain’t you?’

‘How long is this going to take?’

‘As long as we feel like. Looks a good job for us with no one in charge so a good few cups of tea and breaks plus of course our ciggies, a good week I’d say. Wayne gave James another wink as as he did so he let his hand run down the shaft of his cock making sure that James saw the full length of his dick.

James realized that Wayne was a bloody  troublemaker just baiting so decided to go off to the office without any more to say.

‘You know mate you’d be better off as one of us workies. A fucking better life than stuck in an office.’

Sitting on the bus James kept thinking what Wayne had said about being a workie and the idea of being one working along side Jake and Wayne in full Hi Viz gear made his cock rigid under his briefcase. Christ I’d be so horny working with them I’d never get any work done he joked to himself.

When he got home the two blokes had left. During the night he could not take his mind of Wayne’s arse in those Hi Viz trousers and those tats and dirt and the shaved head. He kept waking up with a raging knob on but decided not to wank as he was waiting to see the two of them the next day.

He remembered waking up early because the doorbell rang. He went to open and on the doorstep was a bag, no one there. What the hell is this?

Might as well open he thought and as he unzipped he caught sight of bright orange HI Viz clothing.

Someone must have left this but I didn’t see yesterday evening.

As he put his hand in the bag he stroked the gear and felt his cock harden.

I’ve got to look at this. He took out everything and laid it out on the table. There were a pair of thick rigger boots well used and filthy with the leather on the toe caps worn so he could see the metal. A pair of yellow socks with holes in the toes. a pissed stained worn jockstrap, A pair of mucky Hi Viz trousers with a thick belt, a ripped T shirt stained with dirt and snot, a waistcoat and helmet.

They are all much too big for me he thought sadly but he leant over the table and started smelling everything. Christ the socks are stinking with a real cheesy feet smell. It’s as though they’ve never been washed. The T shirt smelt of BO and dirt and as for the jockstrap it really smelt of piss and fresh piss at that full of yellow stains. As he stroked the jockstrap there were hard sections which he could see were of dried cum. The smell of it all as he rubbed his hands over the clothing had him so worked up he thought he might cum, his cock was already oozing precum.

‘Just looking at all this is making me so horny I’ve got to try it on even if it is too big, I just want to feel all this dirt and piss against me.’

He picked up the jockstrap and started rubbing it over his face. He wanted to cover himself with the smell of stale piss. He rubbed it over his nose and over his eyes then started stuffing it into his mouth until he was almost gagging with the smell but the more he stuffed in the more the precum appeared on the tip of his cock. With the jockstrap now moist from his spit he put on the jockstrap knowing it was far too big. As he pulled it up his legs so he suddenly felt dizzy and different. His legs started growing not just in height but width, they were bloody chunky legs with big muscles and his soft downy leg hair changed, thick dark hair started sprouting all over his legs even across the top of his feet. He pressed his stiff cock into the jockstrap and the outline changed. What was just a normal erect dick strained so much as the cotton he thought is would burst. It was a monster tool and thick as his arm scarcely able to be contained. Black curly pubic hair suddenly was growing all around sideways, upwards like a bloody gorilla,. His waist had expanded and the elastic was straining around his waist. The colour of his skin had changed from pinky white to a dark tan which with so much hair he could hardly see.

James could not understand but he knew he had to continue getting into the gear. He next put on the socks, dirty stinkin and his toes were popping through the end he must be a size 12 at least what had happened to his size 8.He lifted the Hi viz trousers and thought they were much too big for him but as he dragged them up his leg they started to feel tight. He could hardly get them over his pouch so hard was his big cock. He pushed them over and they felt so tight across his arse but as he looked down so his stomach started to change and push out. Not just a little but one hell of a lot. He had a bloody great beer belly and the hair from his pubes was rapidly speading up over the top of his trousers. As he tied his belt so his belly spread out over. He lifted the T shirt and smelt the armpits. God they stank of sweat, and there was a rip down part of the front. As he put it over his head he felt his arms ache and his chest tense. Looking more carefully his arms had expanded to reveal hard muscle he knew he never had and not just muscle but Tattoos all the way down both arms and yet more thick black hair. Christ it looked so bloody macho. The hair moved over his shoulders and he could feel it moving down both back and front. He seems like a bloody gorilla His chest seemed to blow out, the belly more pronounced and a big pair of hairy tits. The rip in the T shirt meant that one of his tits was poking through showing a big juicy nipple with a thick steel ring. As he went to put on the Hiviz waistcoat his arm brushed his face. Where was all that smooth skin of his, instead he took his thick nicotined fingers over a big bushy beard and up to a shaved head.. Only one thing left, his helmet. It looked miles too big but as he brought it down it was the perfect size , he head had expanded so much.

However the biggest change was when the helmet was fully on. James suddenly felt a strong rush of blood running round his entire body. His brain felt fried. He put his hands up to his face and shouted not in his well spoken soft voice  but in a strongly accented deep tone.

‘I’m fucking Big Jim and where are those fucking skivers. Time someone fucking told them who’s Boss and its me. Time they make it up as I’m needing a fucking shag.’

With that he opened the door and Wayne and Jake were sitting with ciggie in hand  and no sign of any tools.

‘What the fuck do you two think your doing. I hate fucking skivers. Get the hell in here now.’

Wayne could not believe what he saw but both were so surprised they stood up speechless and went inside.

‘So you’s think that jus because I’m no with yos you can do whit you like. Well I’ll tell you I’m the one who gives the orders not fucking you. And its lucky for you that I’m feeling fucking horny so no docking of wages but time to keep me happy and shoot a load.’ Big Jim shouted and belched rubbing his hand down the length of his cock

‘That’s a fucking monster you’ve got there Jim and I can see its already rock hard the way its tenting.’

‘Too fucking right and see that arse of your’s boy well that’s where its going. And don’t tell me you don’t like big cock. ‘

‘No way Big Boy’

With that Big Jim grabbed Wayne from the back and yanked him back bringing his bushy bearded face against Wayne. I told you what I’m doing and you do nothing but agree. Right got that?

Jim sent a big gob of spit into Wayne’s face.

‘OK mate sure thing’

Still holding Wayne by the collar with one hand  Big Jim yanked open Waynes flies and pulled down his HI Viz . As he did so, Wayne’s erect cock sprang up.

‘No way you say? That stiff dick of yours is telling me something else. A good size boy and any dick as stiff as this wants a fuck. So bend over now.

And as for you Jake stop staring and rubbing your crotch. I can see that knob on from here, getting you going is it?

‘Sure bloody is Big Jim’

‘So fuckin unzip yourself and lets see what you’re made off.’

Jake stuck his hand into his Hi Viz and pulled out a long thin hard cock.

‘You can have a good wank when I say so but first your goin’ to suck yer mates dick and when I say suck I wanna see his tool all the way down your throat.

Right Wayne I said bend over .

As he pushed the lad down he took his other arm and slapped hard across his arse

‘Fuckin hell man that hurts’

‘I want to get your bum nice and hot for my cock, so quit the moaning and with that he struck again as the arse showed red.

‘Time to give you  a sackful of cum boy. He dropped a gob of spit onto his throbbing cock and worked it, then taking hold of each cheek he spread them apart to get a look at Wayne’s hole.

‘Big hole boy for someone like you. Don’t tell me you’ve not had a dick my size up that crack of yours’

 ‘Now inch that arse back so I can spear you and don’t worry I’ll take my time.’ Slowly he inched his cock into the hole his spit giving as much lube as necessary

‘That’s it boy you now start moving back onto my prick’

‘Fuck I feel I’m going to explode’

‘Oh stop the crap and take it like a man.. That’s it you’ve got the hang of it now. Keep moving your arse further and further in. You’re tight but fucking fantastic ‘Keep going you’re almost at the hilt.’

‘I fucking hope so cant take much more length.’

With one push Big Jim was fully in.

Right Jake just fuckin looking and rubbing your dick, its time for you to give some action and give our mate here some head. I can see you can’t wait to get his knob down your throat.

Jake bent down while Wayne pushed himself further and further into Big Jim’s pubes.

‘Christ I can feel you right up’

‘I fuckin well hope so’

Jake  started licking Wayne’s head dripping his spit and feeling it mix with Wayne’s precum.

‘Load of pre there man. You’d have to with a dick this size up you

Jake slowly let his mouth move up the shaft, making sure his saliva made the cock easy to get down his throat. He loved cock especially Wayne’s as the further down he got the thicker the cock was making him open his mouth fully. Once fully in he starting sliding his mouth up and down the shaft getting faster and faster

‘Fuck man, you always give the best head. Come on Jim get that prick of yours moving in and out. I wanna come with you spurting inside me.’

‘You asked for it boy and with that Jim started lunging in and out making sure his groin was right into Wayne’s arse, pounding him. He could hear the noise of the precum and spit getting louder and louder the more he fucked.

Jake had his hand wrapped around his dick wanking hard ready to swallow all Wayne’s juice

Jesus man I’m going to come, your big dick is making me so fucking horny I can’t wait any longer. Jake get ready to swallow, I’ve got bags of cum going down yer throat.’

Big Jim slowly took his cock back ready for the final push.

‘Ready boy I’m cumin all the way up you. So fucking much it’ll be coming out yer mouth.’

‘Fuck man I’m cumming

‘So am I, take it Jake, shit what a fiuck’

‘Yes  boi here is comes yea, Fucking hell.’

And with that Big Jim threw his head back and all went dark

James woke up. It had all been a dream but not only had Big Jim spunked but James’s dream was so real he had come all over his chest, spunk all the way to his neck.

‘God what a dream that was amazing. I’ll need to go and shower.’

And with that the doorbell went not just once but several times.

‘Christ I’ll have to answer that. He quickly put on his tracksuit and hoping no one would notice his dripping cock making a stain, he opened the front door.

Wayne was standing leaning against the door frame with mug in hand, his eyes glinting at James, dressed in full HiViz with a thick jacket and trousers.

‘So mate, I need some water for my tea. Thought I’d get some from you. You going to ask me in?’

‘I’m busy but if you just want some water come into the kitchen.. Where’s your mate?’

‘Buggered off so just me today, at least for the moment.’

‘Let me have your mug and I’ll fill up.’

‘Don’t think I’m wrong mate but you smell of spunk. Am I right? Looks as though there some left overs staining your trackies. Been wanking thinking of me, eh’

James was speechless

‘I saw you looking at me rubbing me crotch the first day and when I saw you looking out the window I bent down knowing you were getting off seeing my tight bum. Right eh? I fucking knew you were wanking at the window. So you get off on Hi Viz workies do you? I tell you we get hit on all the times by blokes who love the gear like you. So you wanna try some on, what about mine. Bet that would really turn you. You’d feel my body part of you eh?’

Wayne gave his cock an ru knowing full well James was staring at him, and all this talk was getting not just him but James also really horny

‘Well em, if you want.’

‘Right then get your trackies off and I can first see that bod of yours and all the spunk that’s drying off.’

James did as he was told took his trackies off

‘Shit man that’s a hell of a lot of spunk I can see. Good balls eh? And not a bad sized dick either which I can see is looking for some hot action. Got a wee surprise for you mate, hope you are ready. I knew I would have you today.’

Wayne undid his jacket and opened up to take off. Underneath James saw a white T shirt with the word SKIN in large red letters on the front and red braces. His tats showed strong all the way down his arms

Wayne let down his trousers and under he had a pair of bleachers and 19hole Doc Martins with yellow laces.

‘Eyes out on stalks boi? Like what you see. This is me when not a workie but I still luv being a fucking workie.’

Wayne stood there in front of James with his head fully shaved and glistening and all the tattoos showing down his muscled arms, he was the perfect skin.

‘So get the gear on.’ Wayne barked at James.

All James wanted was to put on the Hi Viz gear and he could smell Wayne  he hadn’t washed for several days but that made it all the better.  James just wanted to please Wayne

God it felt great and knowing it was Wayne’s made him start to feel so horny.

Wayne put his arm around James’s neck and pulled him in to him so their faces were touching.

‘Now open yer mouth.’

As James opened his mouth so Wayne kissed him and stuck his tongue down the throat releasing a huge gob of spit into James mouth.

‘Swallow that’ he barked.

As James let the gob slide down his throat so he suddenly had a burning sensation like an electric jolt through his body but it felt bloody great.

‘Feeling good boi eh?’

‘Yea feel different.’

‘Bloody right what’s yer name?’

‘J-boi’

‘Yeh and what are you?’

‘Your bitch’

And what does my bitch do

Lick your boots

‘So fucking get down and do it in my hi viz gear. You love my fuckin gear don’t you bitch’

J-boi did as told and knelt on the floor covering Wayne’s boots with spit and licking. Wayne put one booted foot on J-boi’s head and pressed it down.

‘I said fucking lick, so get on with it. You love it boy licking my boots and being my bitch.’

J-boi licked as though his life depended on it and the more he licked he more his cock hardened making him feel so horny. He loved his cock rubbing against Wayne’s trousers making him feel part of Wayne, a skin workie.

‘Now work your way up my bleachers’

Slowly still tonguing J-boi made his way up until he came to the hard long outline of Waynes cock. Shit what a cock. His full length was straining down his bleacher leg wanting to be released but not before he made J-boi work for it.

‘Now get your mouth round my head and feel the length. Good aint it, it’s what you want you fuckin little bitch.

J-boi said nothing,  he was too busy loving feeling the cock through the bleachers. He sat back looking up at Wayne like a pup.

‘You want my dick down that throat of yours don’t you boi’

‘Fucking right I do Master. You do with me what you want.’

With difficulty Wayne pulled down his zip and forced outhis thick juicy dick. It bounced up in boi’s face.

‘Look mate you’ve got be fucking hard, that what bitches do. So open that fucking mouth wide and take what’s coming to you’ as he smeared his pre cum cock against J-boi’s face

Wayne grabbed boi by the hair.

‘Once you’ve had my spunk I’m getting rid of all that  fuckin hair of yours. I wan my bitch a true skinhead. As you’r goin to be a fucking dirty workie you’ve gotta look a real man

He rammed hic dick into Boi’s mouth. At first he gagged with the size and ferocity that Wayne rammed it in but he wanted every inch Wayne could give him and let his mouth and throat take the full length. He felt the pubes rubbing against his face.

‘Jesus you love my sweaty dick. I haven’t washed for a couple of days knowing I was coming here. Nice a cheesy with some hardened cum on it. Thinking of you in my Hi Viz gear sucking me off had me wanking big time but better knowing that now you’re no longer a fucking pansy but one of us Skins. A bit of work but I’ll have you tattooed, hair shaved and smoking packets of ciggies in no time

His hands still grabbing Boi, he pulled him in and out, Boi’s spit dripping down his face

‘Christ you know how to give head boi. I picked the right one to be my bitch. I’m going cum and you’re gonna take all. There’s a sackful going down.

Boi in Wayne’s Hi Viz could only think of all that cum and sucked quicker and quicker.

‘Christ I’m coming ,take it all boy’ and he exploded into Boi’s mouth. Too much for him to swallow and it oozed down his chin and on to the Hi Viz jacket. ‘Christ what a fucking blow job. Jesus boi you’re the best.’

He hauled Boi up and stuffed his mouth down bois throat licking his own cum and feeling Boi’s spit.

Master, my cocks so fucking hard in your gear, I need to cum.’

‘Ok Boi but rub yerself off in my gear, I want all that cum to run down and harden inside. Let me see you wank now Boi.

Boi had his hand around his dick rubbing up an down on the trousersfeeling Wayn’s hardened cum inside and knowing he was going to cum and mix it with Wayne’s

That’s it Boi, shoot yer fucking load inside.

Christ, I’m cumming, shit I’ve still a fucking great load in me balls Yeeees fuck man , shitttt! And Boi gushed a wad of cum inside Wayne’s Hi viz and Boi could feel it running all the way down his leg, loads of good white cum.

He sat back exhausted still oozing Wayne’s cum from his mouth

Zipping himself up Wayne said

‘Right Boi its time you got your hands dirty and came out to do an afternoon’s work in your Hi Viz. I’ll watch you with me mug of tea. Then it’s off to the barbers for you and a full razor job. I want that head of yours gleaming. After that the Tat shop to get your fist tattoo and I’ll choose what it is. Like the idea of a swastika on yer neck. Have you looking like a real skin. We’ll pick up a few can of beers with your money and then home to get you into some good skin gear of mine before we hit the pubs. Seeing you get into my skin gear will make me so fucking horny that you can expect a right good fucking before we go out. It what you wanna be mate, a fucking Hi Viz Skin. My bitch. If yer lucky I may share you around with some of the blokes

‘Sounds fucking great, master’

‘That’s my J-boi’

To be continued?

[beomiracles]

Glad to be one of the 500!!

I had a few ACTUAL dreams of taehyun but I remember only glimpses of them, so I'll write what I remember, and you can choose, tho I'm not sure they will be towards your interest, but I'll try. You can make them suggestive if you want cuz smut is a survival necessity. They are:

- I and taehyun had met at a dating (for choosing partners) vacation camp for college students and we went there with our bsfs where tyun had beom with him and we grew attached or something like that, but I don't really remember much other than a field with soccer, and a date.

- taehyun had come to me from the future to the time when we still hadn't met (only me and my sibling could see him cuz he was from the future and cuz we had strong connection) while I was on vacation with my family, to complete a mission lol or to correct a mistake, I don't know? But I only remember an open roof bus ride with my head on his shoulder and me pretending to sleep while my brother and tyun were discussing ways to complete the mission and my brother said to taehyun, "bro, stop taking continuous glances at her, and pay attention to what I'm saying." And I tried my best to not smile cuz I was 'pretending' to sleep.

The above two options were for the 'build your own dream' category.

For the 500 words category:

- soft morning fluff with waking up beside bf or husband tyun, cuz soft morning fluffs keep me alive.

You can choose either of them, thankyou so much<3!!

And sorry if these were dumb or didn't make sense at all!!

THANKYOU AND SORRY AGAIN!!

Also, CONGRATS FOR THE 500!!

500 BASH SPECIAL

#serene adds ✎... these weren't dumb at all!! They were really cute, I'm so jealous that you get actual dreams of them, I only ever dreamt about Jungkook and even then he barely acknowledged my existence.. I picked the first one hehe! Though I changed it up a little but kept the college and football theme, I hope you'll still enjoy (੭ ･ᴗ･ )੭ sort of proofread

wc -> 1.4k

pairings football player!taehyun x afab!reader warnings making out, handjob & fingering but like at the same time, implied oral (f. rec), taehyun is kinda whiny I think, ft. bsf beomgyu

The sun was practically melting the blue plastic seats off the bleachers and you felt your thighs sticking to them in a most uncomfortable manner. Loud cheering echoed out over the field and with a hand shielding your eyes from the vile exposure of sunlight, you peer out amongst the players in the hopes of spotting your boyfriend amongst the crowd. 

Before you can find him, a voice calls out for you, shifting your attention to your left as Beomgyu takes the seat next to yours. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you!” He exclaims as he hands you a soda which you gratefully accept, the cool liquid much needed. “You found him yet?” He asks as he, too, squints toward the players running on the grass. 

“There”, you say as you point toward the very front. Taehyun was dribbling the ball between his legs as he ran toward the other team’s goal. The cheering around you only increases as he maneuvers past the opposing players before finally finding an open slot to shoot his shot. — The screams erupting were deafening yet you couldn’t help but smile as your boyfriend ran back to his teammates, all of them jumping with joy. 

“Tsh, what a show-off”, Beomgyu mutters as he studies his cuticles. You scoff as you give his shoulder a push, “and you could’ve done it better?” — “Give me two weeks”, he sneers as he raises his injured arm, covered in a thick layer of bandage. “Would you really want to crush your best friend’s ego like that?” You muse as you take a sip of your soda. Beomgyu huffs as he leans back, “such trivial things hold no significance out there.” 

He then turns to you with a small frown, “speaking of which, where were you earlier? I thought we were supposed to meet by the library?” Oh, right, you had completely forgotten about that. “Oh my god I’m sorry I was just going to say goodbye to Taehyun I-” Beomgyu holds up a hand as he shakes his head, “don’t. I do not wish to indulge in such gruesome details.” 

Your lips part as you frown, “it was just a goodluck kiss!” Well at least it was supposed to be. 

“Taehyun!” Your voice echoes off the walls as you wander down the empty hallway toward the locker rooms. There was no reply, maybe he had already left for the field? Yet the loud chatter coming from the other side of the door to the guy’s changing room told you that he must still be around. Fishing up your phone from your back pocket, your fingers search for his contact when suddenly someone grips onto your arm. 

It’s with a small shriek that you’re pulled inside one of the old out of use classrooms. “Taehyun, what the fuck!” You practically yell as you give your boyfriend’s chest a hard shove. “Scream a little louder and we’ll have coach coming for us”, he mumbles as his arms wrap around your body, pulling you flush against him. 

“Shouldn’t you be out there, with your coach?” You question as you raise him an eyebrow. Taehyun chuckles as he shakes his head, “he won’t notice me being missing for a couple of minutes.” — “You’re team captain”, you point out to which your boyfriend snorts. “Don’t remind me.” 

Your eyes flutter as he pushes a few strands of hair from your face, “you came to wish me goodluck?” He lets his head tilt to the side as you stammer for a response, “I uh, mhm!” you finally splutter and he grins. “Just a quick kiss though”, you say as you study him with a wary expression, all too familiar with your boyfriend’s antics. “Alright, just a quick kiss”, he agreed as his hand slid down your back to take place on your hip. 

You never got tired of kissing Taehyun. He was tender, gentle, your kisses taste like cotton candy, sweet and soft, quickly melting on your tongues. But those very kisses soon sparked into something far more lewd as your boyfriend backed you up against the neatest desk. — “Taehyun..” your low whisper rings out in the quiet classroom and he hums against your lips. “It was only supposed to be a quick kiss”, you whine as his hands trail beneath your loose t-shirt. 

“Mhm”, he breaths against your cheek before reconnecting your lips. “We are still kissing”, he says. “Yes but-” you gasp as his fingers shamelessly slip past the cup of your bra, methodically stimulating your nipples as they harden under his touch. “So, it’s still just a quick kiss”, he assures you as his other hand trails down your chest, struggling with the button of your jeans. 

You consider his words for approximately half a second before giving in. You were still kissing, so it could count as a quick kiss, no? The second Taehyun’s hand slips beneath the fabric of your panties you suddenly find that you don’t care anymore. Your hips immediately move forward as you chase his touch. Taehyun groans against your mouth as he drags his fingers between your wet folds, coating himself in your slick before pushing inside your throbbing cunt. 

“F-fuck”, you croak as you bite down on his lip, pulling a soft gasp from your boyfriend. — “Touch me”, he practically whimpers. You didn’t have to be told twice, your hand quickly unzipping his pants as they pulled his underwear back to free his cock. Your fingers around his shaft cause his breath to hitch as his own fingers curl inside of you, making your thighs tremble. 

You squeeze his tip, thumb pressing against his slit before letting your palm slide down the length of him. “Mhn, fuck angel”, he splutters as his hips jerk forward, the twitching of his dick only making you clench down harder around his fingers as you gasp in ecstasy. 

“You’d better win out there today”, you murmur against his wet lips, tongue dwelling deep inside his hot mouth and you feel him shudder against you. “Anythin’ for you angelface”, he groans as his thumb rubs your clit feverishly. “Anything huh?” You hiccup as his fingers stretch your pretty cunt, your boyfriend nods against you. 

Feeling the familiar knot building in your stomach, you draw in a sharp breath as your hand quickens its pace on his cock. “If you win today, I’ll let you fuck me raw”, the statement falling from your lips surprises you just as much as it does him. You felt him twitch within the grasp of your hand, the thought of you granting him something like that felt almost unreal and he moaned into your mouth. 

“I’ll win, I’ll win”, he murmurs as he deepens your already messy kiss. “Fuck angel I’m-” he barely gets his warning out before he spills all over your hand, hips stuttering as his fingers inside of your freeze. — He’s barely come down from his high when he pulls himself from your lips, making you gasp as he falls to his knees, impatiently tugging your jeans down your thighs as he buries his head between them, determined to make you finish before his game. 

Taehyun is the first to greet you after the match, his shirt drenched in sweat as he clings to you, burying his face in the crook of your neck. “Ew, gross”, Beomgyu bitterly comments as he watches the two of you with distaste. Your boyfriend rolls his eyes as he leans back to press a sloppy kiss to your cheek. “Jesus Taehyun, you smell awful”, you grin as your hand on his chest prevents him from going in for seconds. 

“You wound me”, he drawls as he tugs you closer despite your greatest efforts. — Swinging his bag over his shoulder, Beomgyu’s gaze suspiciously flickers between you and Taehyun. “You guys are coming to the celebration party tonight, right?” 

Your lips part in an unspoken reply but your boyfriend beats you to the matter. “No can do”, he shrugs as his hand squeezes your waist. Beomgyu frowns as his eyes flit toward you, only to be met by an equally unenthusiastic shrug. “She owes me a kiss”, Taehyun then adds and you shoot him a glare. 

“Actually she owes me a lot of kisses.”

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[wilbursprincess]

“Damn, You’re Hard as a Rock!”

Simpbur x Female Reader

Warnings: Reader walks in on Simpbur jerking off to a picture of her, handjob, sub!Simpbur (when is he not tbh), masturbation

Another one I yoinked from the vault! At this point, we all know my soft spot for Simpbur, so I wrote this for one of the days in Fictober. It’s one of my personal favorites so I hope you enjoy! Been neglecting my vault due to my irl friend informing me he found my blog (ily dw) and the sheer number of asks as of late!

Smut under cut!

“Will, I’m home!” I call out, slipping off my coat and hanging up my purse. I peek my head into the living room, expecting to see him watching a movie, waiting up for me, but nothing.

The only place I haven’t looked is in our bedroom, and as I walk towards it, the door is shut, light spilling under the crack at the bottom of the door.

I push open the door, sighing. “Sorry I was so late, the bus took ages, and-” Cutting myself off abruptly when I look up, seeing exactly why Wilbur didn’t respond when I got home.

Jeans around his ankles, my favorite tube of hand cream laying next to him, one hand holding his phone, the glowing screen displaying whatever he’s getting off too, the other hand working up and down his lotion-slick cock.

“You’re home!” He says, an embarrassed smile growing on his face.

Laughing, I sit down on the bed next to him. “You missed me, huh?”

Wilbur nods sheepishly, spinning around his phone so I can see he’s been looking at a photo of me, stretched out by a pool in a lime-green bikini.

“Well, I’m flattered,” I say, grabbing the tube of hand cream. “Do you want me to-”

He frantically nods, letting go of his cock, and it lightly slaps against his stomach. Gently kissing him on the forehead before slicking up my hand, slowly starting to work up and down his length.

“Damn, you’re hard as a rock!” I comment, twisting my thumb over his tip and making him groan. “You really did miss me!”

“I tried to wait until you got home,” Wilbur pants, breaking off with a low moan. “Sorry.”

I shake my head, giving him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry about it, baby. I love giving you a hand.”

Wilbur grins, a blissful expression in his pleasure-glazed eyes. “Fuck, why does it feel so much better when you do it?”

His hips keep jumping up, trying to thrust into my hand as I give him long, slow strokes, rubbing my thumb on the sensitive spot on the underside of the head. Wilbur’s breaths are coming faster, moans and other beautiful noises dripping from his mouth more and more as he gets closer to his climax.

“Gonna cum for me?” I coo, speeding up my hand and making him whine, hips jutting up into my hand. “What was that, Will? Couldn’t quite hear you.”

Wilbur whimpers, cock twitching in my hand. “Yes, fuck.”

A few more pumps of my hand, and he’s spilling all over my hand, drops landing on his exposed stomach and even a few on the sheets.

“C’mere, baby,” he murmurs, the post-orgasm haze making him cuddly as usual. “I missed you.”

Laughing, I squirm away from his embrace. “No! You’ll get cum all over my dress! I’ll get you a towel.”

I toss him the one I keep in my nightstand for times just like this, then head over to Wilbur’s closet, swapping my dress for one of his t-shirts, changing from heels into fuzzy socks.

Crawling back onto our bed, he’s taken off his jeans, just in a pair of boxers and a white t-shirt. Wilbur wraps me into his outstretched arms, letting me swing a leg over his waist and snuggle into his chest.

“I love you so much, baby girl,” he murmurs, kissing my forehead. “You’re the best thing that’s ever been mine.”

My heart swells with the soft glow of love, and I run my fingers through his fluffy brown curls. “I love you too, Will.

[mediocre-quill-ink]

I just found your Dirty cop post and I'm here to ask...

Are you planning on making a continuation perhaps? 👉🏼👈🏼 Cause it was fucking amazing!

Ty so much for the request, and thank you for saying it was amazing. i really appreciate it!!!

Pt.1

Dirty cop pt 2

Content: probably inaccurate to the game. Tried to work this one into Canon a little bit. Ralph is a major character in the first half, Simi public sex, light bondage, a lot of degrading, female anatomy but gender nutral terms when being adressed. Connor has a sweet spot???

I gazed into the pouring rain, wondering how long till freedom comes. How much longer I need to hide. To run. Ever since I got apprehended by that RK800 a week ago, my anxiety has been spiked. Not to say I completely disliked our interaction. One moment in particular I was quite fond of but... getting arrested or dismantled is by no means something I'll embrace.

I've heard news here and there of another rogue android "freeing" others. Whispers of a revolution on the rise. God, I hope so. I want to feel safe. Free.

I flenched at a clatter, whiping around to see a scared WR600, a large blue gash stretched across his face. A floor board snapped benith him, causing him to fall through it and trip, letting out frustrated and pained cries. "Are you alright, Ralph?" I asked, slightly started.

I met Ralph a week ago after running from the RK800, connor. The bus dropped me off in front of the dilapidated building, and I decided to make a temporary home there. At least until I could find a better squat. When I first hopped the fence, I was surprised to find myself at knife point. Something along the lines about how he doesn't trust strangers. How humans hurt him. With enough convincing, I was able to stay. I don't entirely trust him. He's unpredictable and violent, but I like him. He's fun and cares a lot. He seems to have grown rather attached to me despite his fears. And I'm sure he feels the same way about me. He's really sweet when he's not flailing around a knife, but he's also very cautious of me, doesn't like sudden movements.

"No! Ralph is not okay! He got hurt!" I sighed, slowly walking over. He landed on his hands and knees, turing over and sitting down. "Are you bleeding?" I asked, crouching down. He rolled up a pant leg, reveling a patch of the synthetic skin rubbed away, the white plastic shell cracked. I sucked in a breath. "Okay, no bleeding. Good. You're damaged, but you're good. You're fine. Can you walk?" Ralph didn't say anything in response, just muttering to himself. "Ralph? Are you hearing me?" I placed a hand on his shoulder and shook him gently. He glanced over at me for a moment before looking off into space again, still muttering. "Okay. I'm gonna walk away for a minute and give you some time to breathe. I'll be back soon, and I'll take care of you, alright?" He didn't respond. I removed my hand from his shoulder and stood up. "I'll be back soon." I repeated before finally walking away.

I stepped into the dusty living room, taking in a deep breath and sitting down. Fuck. I need to find repairs fast. Ralph stabbed me the first day I found this place, so I need to find a proper bag of theriam and probably a hot poke to seal the wound. And now, among other things, Ralph needs a replacement leg piece. As far as I'm aware, this is his only cracked area, which can lead to nasty injuries or malfunctions. I heard there's a small cyberlife store a few miles away. With a proper disguise and some luck, I can probably sneak some supplies back home.

Just then, I heard shifting outside the house. Jumping to my feet, I snuck over to the farthest wall, listening. It sounded like a woman and a little girl sitting at the bus stop. "Kara, I'm cold," said the little girl. "Don't worry, alice, well find some place warm to stay soon," then followed by floot steps, walking down the street to the left twords the convince store. I let out a worried sigh.

"Ralph? Are you feeling any better?" I asked, walking back into the room. He sat in a slightly more relaxed pose. "Ralph is better. Ralph has faced worse." He muttered. "Can you stand? Walk?" I replied. He took a moment, placing his palms firmly on the ground and pushing, standing up. One leg was slightly wobbly, but I think that was more duing of nerves. He exchanged balance between legs and finally stated, "Yes, Ralph can stand."

"Good," I sighed. "Now come on, let's head over to the living room. I heard some people nearby. They're probably harmless. They sounded like a woman and child, but I'd like somewhere secure to stay anyways. " He quickly agreed. "Yes. You can never be too careful."

The sun rose, and I found myself anxiously staring at the wall. Just past it was more noise. Down the street was a cop car. From what I can hear, a robbery. The perpetrators, a rogue nanny android, and a kidnapped child. They may have been who I heard last night. But one thing sticks out to me. A familiar voice imminating from across the street. I can't place why it's so familiar, but it brings up strange emotions. Fear, excitement... arousal? It's husky and dry in tone. Very matter of fact. "Cops. Ralph doesn't like cops." Ralph whispered. "I know, I know." I muttered, trying to figure out what to do. I took a moment to think. Evaluating what to do.

Should we sit and wait it out? Should I run? Go get supplies? Hell, stand in as a witness?

Fuck, think this through.

After a frustrating inner battle I chose.

"Ralph. You stay here and hidden, alright? I'll leave and pick up supplies." I breathed, anxiety pricking my back. "Go out? That's insane!" Ralph replied. "I know, I know. But I'm betting on the cops across the street being too distracted with the crime scene to give too much attention. I'll hop around the back. And be as quick as I can, alright?" "What if you get caught? Ralph does not want his new friend to get caught." He replied, a bit more frantic. I grabbed his hand, stating, "If I get caught, I'll find a way to escape. I did last time. Just keep hidden." I let go of his hand and headed outside before further argument could be raised.

I headed to the back of the property, where the least traffic can spot and swiftly hopped the fence. Trying to casually walk down the street. Don't be conspicuous. As I strode down the street I couldn't help but stop for a moment to look at the crime scene. The clerk at the store was speaking to an officer taking notes. There was an older man with shaggy grey hair and an ugly shirt underneath a jacket. Next to him was a much younger looking android, clean-cut hair, suit calm and confident posture. Oh god. It's him. How the fuck did he end up here?

He turned to inspect the area, looking at the abandoned house. I tried to casually lean against the fence and not look to conspicuous. Pulling my hood up a bit more and trying to look around as if I lost my way. "We should investigate the house. Mabye the criminals took hiding in there." Spoke the RK800, pointing at it before glancing at me. His led spinning.

Stay calm

Stay calm.

When I found myself at Ralph's house, I removed my led as quick as I could and found some human clothes in an upstairs closet. Hopefully, if he's not paying too much attention, he won't recognize me. Or at least think im a different android of the same model.

"You! Come here." He hollered at me.

I glanced around and pointed a thumb at myself.

He nodded, repeatedly for me to come to him.

Shit.

I tried to calmly walk his way. I thought about booking it but then I'd be undoubtedly suspicious. as I finally stood in front of him, his led flickered and swirled, brows knitting slightly. "good morning. apologies for throwing off your day but I need to ask a few questions. do you have any information on the crime scene?" he gestures to the robbed convenience store, his voice with a whisper of suspicion. "oh. not that i know of, no." I breathed, trying to suppress my anxious energy. "well it'd be helpful to ask you a few questions just in case. I hope you understand." he spoke dryly as he subtly turned to other officers. "make sure to sweep the area." he muttered to them before turning back to me. "have you noticed any strange activity in the area?"

"no. I don't think so."

"have you seen an AX400 with a child? she's brunette, about nine years old."

"nope."

"what were you doing by that abandoned building?"

a tenseness gripped my metallic spine. "I was on a way to a local restaurant, i wanted to get some breakfast. But i had to stop and make sure i was going the right way."

"you stared at the crime scene for quite a bit. at me too. whys that?"

i caught myself from gulping and put on a playful smile "well, natural curiosity. disaster is hard to look away from. also, stop me if I'm overstepping officer but... beauty is too." i could feel my false sense of confidence fade into an embarrassed cringe as i finished. his led swirled again and in the distance, the sound of his older coworker cough awkwardly.

"mmm hmm." was all Connor replied. after a moment his led stilled. "you look awfully familiar." he stated, "have we met before?" i sucked in a breath, my chest tightening. "no, not that I'm aware of." i replied.

he scanned me up and down literally and figuratively. then his eyes twitched slightly. "you look very similar to the DB500." he now sounded a bit more accusatory. "well, they had to get the faces for androids from somewhere. I'm sure someone from cyberlife used my face as an example."

"did you volunteer at the company for development?" he asked, again more accusitory than genuine.

"no."

"then they didnt."

there was a moment of silence.

"hank! i need to take this person into further custody for questioning. hold down the team until i get back!" he shouted before opening the door to a cop car and shoving me inside, shutting the door behind me.

"what? Connor! we can have another officer drive them to the station where are you going?" "i know but this witness seems to valuable to interrogate later and to dangerous to be shipped out with a human. ill be back shortly." and he swiftly pulled into the car, ordering it to drive. as it rolled away from the crime scene, the grey haired man could be heard in the distance shouting "goddamn it!"

"what's happening? where are we going?" I ask, gripping the seat. "one thing to know about me is that i always accomplish my mission. you happen to be one that slipped away. i intend to finish my mission." his voice was hard and almost spiteful. "and your mission?" I ask, gulping subconsciously. "well. my first objective is to apprehend you. once your under arrest, you'll be shipped off to cyberlife to be dismantled and see what went wrong. my second objective..." he paused. breaths more heavy before continuing. "i have to admit. after you were in my custody, and after my interrogation I couldn't get you out off my mind. it was... frustrating. a new objective has been added. and that's having my way with you."

my knees weaken. my therium pump pulsating a higher rate. "really?" I choked out. "are you willing?" he whispered back.

a chill ran down my now hot spine. "yes. I'm willing."

he pulled the car into an empty parking lot, an area of Detroit i recognized. I didn't make deliveries here often but that's why it stuck out to me. a fairly quiet and isolated part. it used to be a popular housing and restaurant area before people started loosing jobs and going homeless. this was the first of housing areas to go near abandonment. I wanted to ask why he took me here but i had a good idea.

he stepped out of the front seat and opened the back passenger, where I was. he quickly closed the door and leaned into me, placing sloppy kisses on my shoulder. i relaxed into it, letting out a soft moan and wrapping my arms softly around his back. he, in that moment felt so... desperate. it was strange. my few interactions with him so far have been nothing but cold. stiff. dominant. but right now he was... venerable. I couldn't help but place a soft kiss on top of his coffee locks. a soft moan blew against my shoulder in reply, his hands quickly digging under my musky shirt and jacket, cold hands grassing my stomach.

"I haven't been able to get out out of my head sense you've escaped." he mumbled, kisses growing rougher.

"I didn't understand why. at first i thought it was because i was determined about the case." his rough kisses slowly inched up my throat. "but then this... feeling kept bubbling and bubbling until i couldn't handle myself. and i realized i wanted you." his hands grasped my breasts, squeezing slightly the rolling the hardened buds under his thumb's "no... i needed you." he left the softest bite on my jaw before finally planting a deep, hard kiss against my lips.

My eyes rolled to the back of my head, hips bucking into him. I trailed my hands up his back and tangled with his nylon hair. It was soft, not a single knot.

He quickly pulled back from the kiss and finally pushed my clothes above my head, tossing them to the side.

He now dove for my chest, taking one breast in his mouth, wet tongue massaging my nipple. He hooked his thumbs into my pants and tugged them down along with my underwear. It was a rough, almost violent motion. I shimmied my hips, helping him remove them further. He didn't waste time removing them, discarding them just as quickly as my top.

"So desperate"

"What?" He breathed, agrivated expression as he fitted with his belt.

Shit. I thought I was just thinking that. "Nothing." I whispered back. He ripped the belt out out of his pants, pulling them down to reveal a hard-on already springing to life. Holy fuck.

Connor quickly crawled on top of me, caging me against the seat with his arms. He pushed inside me slowly, letting out a soft groan. I could already feel his systems overheating, a heat radiating against my synthetic skin.

He began slow thrusts, planting sloppy kisses against my throat again, now a different side.

Aside from moans and pants, it was eerly quiet. A near abandoned housing area in Detroit was strange. Though I could hear the familiar sounds of cars down the highway or cyberlife advertisements a block down, it was almost eery. Just us parked in an abandoned lot for a former small business pizza restaurant.

"I don't want to hear you call me that again." He grunted against me.

"What?"

His pase picked up, rocking the car slightly. "You called me desprate." He breathed, hot air brushing against my shoulder. "I am not desperate."

"You act it." I replied, arching slightly into him.

He didn't respond, just a swallow imminating from his throat.

"You rushed me into the car when you were on duty. You ripped off clothes, little patience. Your kisses and moans drip with desperation." I added, "I enjoy it. But I have to admit it's not a state I expected you to be in."

"Were you expecting," he let out another choked out moan. "Me to be more dominant?"

"After the impression you left me with the last time? Of corse."

"If you want me to be mean, I'll be mean." He lulled.

At that, an excited moan escaped my throat.

"Do you want me to be mean?" He whispers against my ear, sending shivers down my metallic spine.

"Yes." I whispered.

His pase once again grew rougher, he pulled away from my chest, and sat in a more comfortable position. Instead of pinning me down, he stood upright, grasping my hips and thighs as he plowed into me.

He moved one hand to unfasten his tie. He grabbed my wrists and tied them to the grip on the car door. It fastened tight around my wrists, giving it a few tugs to test and it sat firm around my wrists.

"I can be more than mean," he lulled "I can be cruel." Just after he said that, he pressed a finger against my clit, it began to vibrate. Another wave of pleasure shot up my spine, my mind growing foggy. "And you'd like that, wouldn't you? You filthy fucking Deviant." He panted, pressing hard against my core followed my a sting on my ass. He spanked me. Then, continued to thrust. A shaky moan emerged from my lips, as I tightened around him. He let out a soft pant before quickly regaining composure and giving an cocky smirk. "That what I thought. Disgusting whore." I hummed in agreement. I could feel him twitch inside me.

He used his spair hand to slowly trail my body. From my thighs, up my hips, down my stomach... up my throat. He squeezed. Though I couldn't stop the airway, it did cause a different malfunction. To the voice mojual in my throat. As he squeezed, the moans escaping my throat, choked into nothing but garbled static. "Such lovely sounds~" He hummed. Slowing into a grind. He rocked his hips back and forth, making slow, small thrusts.

I bucked my hips, clinching around him again, forcing out moans from connor. "What a fucking whore. Where have you been all this time? Hiding from me?" He removed the pressure from my throat to allow me to speak. "Fuck," I gasped "I in an abandoned-" I caught myself before I could say the truth. If they haven't searched the house yet, I don't want them to now because of me. Ralph may be a little freak, but I still care about him. "Arcade..." I finally stated. "I was out to find repairs for the games."

Connor stared hard into me as I spoke, using his spare hand to trail across the stab wound Ralph left me when we met. "Who did this to you?"

"It was a misunderstanding. " I mumbled before letting out another moan

He paused to bend down and place a soft kiss on the injury. It was... nice. Soft, genuine. For a brief moment, whatever aggressive mask he had on melted away. Only a moment. Just as quickly as the tenderness came, it went because his expression quickly hardened, stood up, and the movement continued. This time, the shaft moving on its own.

"Fuck," Connor gasped "your such a good hole for me..." He leaned in, pressing his body waight against my core. "You take everything I give you. Such a good girl." He panted, running his hands up my stomach, my chest and softly squeezing my breasts. I could feel him start to twitch inside of me, his moans grew more frequent.

Again, his dominant mask slipping away for a brief moment. He quickly grew desperate again, rhutting against me like a dog in heat. Almost melting against me as he let out whimpers and moans like a cheap whore.

Strings of heat released inside of me, him collapsing into against me.

There was a moment of silence. We were both now sitting next to each other, mostly dressed. For once, his perfect hair was an absolute mess.

"So now what?" I ask. Thinking back to what he told me earlier.

well. my first objective is to apprehend you. once your under arrest, you'll be shipped off to cyberlife to be dismantled and see what went wrong.

My gut wrenched. "Are you gonna... send me off to die now that you got off?"

He sat silent. The cramptness of the car wasn't helping with the suffocating akwardeness.

"I mean... you always complete your mission..." I sighed.

"No."

"What?"

"No... I can't."

I didn't know what to say.

"I can't. I can't take you to jail."

I swallowed hard "why?"

He shook his head, squeezing his hands together. "I... I don't know."

I sucked in a deep breath, squeezing the cool air into my self colling system. "What does this mean?"

He leaned over across me, popping open the door on my side. "Get out. I'll tell Hank you ran away again." I slowly slipped out of the car and stood to stare at him. If I sgull had my led, I'm sure it would be swirling yellow. "You're letting me go?" I whispered.

He nodded solemnly. "I Just... I hope to find you again." He mumbled. He let out a sigh and walked out the car before returning to the drivers seat. He waved goodbye and drove off before I could say anything else. If I could. I was speechless.

Connor. The Deviant hunter.... let me go.

Pt 3

[desired-deity]

Hii, I saw you were writing for sbg now, could you do a Tyler x reader where they’re studying and the reader falls asleep on his shoulder (fox, one shot, whatever you want) thanks

Of course I can! Ty and Aiden are literally my world lol

genre : fluff

type : one shot

TYLER HERNÁNDEZ x FEM! READER

A/n : Hello hello anon! I hope you enjoy this as much as I did while writing it! I’m so sorry if he’s a bit ooc because I’m still trying to navigate all of the characters traits and behaviors! Enjoy ^^

You and Tyler have been together ever since you were moved to Mr. Thompson’s class and grouped with Ashlyn and the rest of the gang for the group project. Then rolled around the Savanna trip. Ever since then, Tyler has been super protective over you and that's basically how you guys got into this relationship. You guys never got sleep anymore but would still help you study before going into the phantom realm, today was one of those days. You went over to his house right after you got off the bus to drop off all your random stuff and grab a snack. When you got Hernández’s house hold, you with a to the Tylor's mather welcomed warm smile with Myler running to the door like you've just come home after 12 years.

“Mi amor... you're here early." Tyler wraps his arms around you carries you to his and room while you were basically thrown over his shoulder. His mom laughed at the sight but texted Tyler about how exhausted you looked.

"Omg! Y/n you've already here!” Taylor started but a death glare was given by her twin, "Yes but we are studying because she's on the brink of failing.” Tyler sternly stated while you spaced out while admiring your boyfriend. Taylor smiled at your actions.

“Fineeee, I’ll leave her alone with you for today.” She said as she walked away while closing the door.

Tyler turned back to you “Anyways…Y/n?” Tyler snapped his fingers in front of your face until you snapped out of your daze. “You okay, love?” He seemed concerned and worried about your droopy eyes.

“Huh? Oh yeah, I’m- I’m fine.” You smiled sweetly but tripped over your words here and there. You were about to say something until a hand gently pushed your head down into his lap.

“Maybe it’ll be better if you rest, princesa. You’re tired, it’s been rough on all of us.” Tyler cracks a small smile while looking down at you, he was always so soft and gentle with you even if you were in the phantom realm. Before you knew it, you were on Tyler’s bed with your legs tangled together. Your head on his heart and his chin in your head. What a great nap with your boyfriend.

[stealanity]

“ ONE BED. ” ft. eric sohn

genre & warnings : cliché one bed trope, classmate ! au, kind of enemies to temporary heating, fluff, one die joke

word count : 1k>

author's note : THIS ISN'T STEALING. i already posted this writing on my zb1 blog, but decided to write it for eric as well. hope you'll enjoy my new work !

« this can't happen. » you say defeatistly, letting your bag fall to the floor and staring at the room's only double bed. why the bus driver had to decide to stop for the night, letting you run around in the downpour turning into a flood to this shabby little hotel. only to discover that the hotel has fewer rooms available than expected, and on top of that, you end up sharing a room with the one person you can't stand.

and obviously, this room has only one bed.

not wanting to deal with your bad temper, your teachers quickly slipped away to their respective rooms, locking their doors, leaving you soaked to the bone, staring at the bed in front of you.

« there is no way i'm getting in a bed with you. » you declared, pointing a finger at the mattress, your gaze pivoting towards the one and only eric sohn, who rolled his eyes and sighed. the boy didn't care about your reaction, adjusting the strap of his bag on his shoulder as he walked around you, infiltrating the bathroom, « you're welcome to the floor. »

with a fake, provocative smile, he finally slammed the door of bathroom, locking it, only for you to hear the shower running a few minutes later. a long sigh left your lips as you decided to leave the room to find something to munch on until you can warm up with a nice hot shower. wandering around the motel, you finally came across a vending machine, taking the time to observe what it was offering. after a few moments of reflection, you simply took a packet of bear jellies and a can of coke, before dragging your feet back to your hotel room.

opening the door, you came face to face with eric, who had just come out of the shower room. as he wiped his hair with his towel, you placed your purchases on the bedside table before grabbing your bag to take his place. there's no feeling more satisfying than throwing off your wet clothes for a hot shower — which you did without further ado.

after long minutes of enjoying the warmth, you put on your pyjamas and made your way to the main bedroom. unsurprisingly, eric was on the bed, scrolling through his phone, completely ignoring you. you didn't wait long before sitting down at the end of the bed, looking around you — there was really nothing to do. on top of that, it probably didn't have a heater because of the way the hairs on your arms stood up from the cold. « woah, it's really cold. » you whispered, pulling your legs up to your chest.

until something hits you square in the back.

ready to turn around and howl at him like a ferocious beast, your fingers came into contact with the object he had thrown at you : a sweatshirt. probably his sweatshirt. surely his sweatshirt. frowning, eric gestured to you to put it on silently, just then returning to his own business on his phone. without bothering to thank him verbally, you slipped it on without further ado, enjoying the softness and warmth of the fabric against your skin.

not mentioning the fact that his scent on it appealed to your nostrils.

swivel for crawling on the mattress to get under the blanket, your gaze landed on him, attracting his attention. lying down as far away from him as possible, you put on a falsely threatening face before speaking : « touch me and die. »

a scoff leave his lips, probably due to the nerve you showed, when he had just sacrificed the warmth of his sweatshirt for you. paying no further attention to him, you turned your back on him and closed your eyes, praying that sleep would come to you as soon as possible.

which obviously didn't happen.

a long sigh left your lips as you didn't dare turn over in bed, pulling as hard as you could on the blanket to cover your frozen body. which drew yet another long annoyed sigh from the boy next to you. moving slightly to stare at the dark ceiling, you nibbled your lower lip as you pondered. should you talk? perhaps the best idea for you both is to have as few altercations as possible, but it was going to be a long night if you kept getting cold like that.

so you decided to talk, « you're not sleeping? » you asked, trying not to turn your gaze to eric, but simply glancing out of the corner of your eye, « nope. »

his voice seemed to fade into a sigh, though his answer was short. « why? » you continued, wrapping your body a little more tightly in the warmth of the blanket. « don't want you to stab me the second i close my eyes. » he declared in an amused tone, which gave way to a small smile at the corner of your lips, as you rolled your eyes. so you decided to look in his direction, just for a few seconds, without thinking that your pupils would be planted in his.

« i won't. » you finally whispered, trying to ignore the cute smile that had just appeared on his lips when you said those words. the moonlight passing through the thin curtains of the motel room illuminated his face, which you noticed had just softened.

suddenly, eric's hand came out of the blanket and slipped around your waist, drawing your body closer to his. you looked at him incredulously, unsure of how to react — but the warmth of his hand against your back made you want to snuggle up to him. « you're cold right? » he said in a whisper, pulling you completely against him, and in an instant your body felt warm again. nodding slightly and muttering an inaudible reply, you pulled yourself up against him, keeping your arms against your chest. finding a comfortable position, you ignored the acceleration of your heartbeat as you closed your eyes, praying that the sandman would pass quickly to put you to sleep.

« this never happened? » you say softly, camouflaging yourself a little more against him, seeking the slightest ounce of warmth from his body. « deal. » he replied, tightening his arms around you, placing his cheek against the top of your head while closing his eyes, ready to fall from exhaustion.

maybe in the end, this night wasn't going to be the worst of all.

taglist ( fill out this form if you want to be added ! ) : @invuwrld @kimsohn @kyusqult

networks : @deoboyznet @kflixnet @bluesia

[ohmygawdyoufoundnemo]

She Plays Bass

Bangchan x reader

•Part 1•

(Brief mention of 'noona', which means older female sibling or older sister in Korean, only because I am a couple of years older than Chan. If you're not a noona, don't worry too much. I just hope you enjoy this read while you're chilling🙏🏻)

Y/N has hit the jackpot when passing her audition and joins Stray Kids on their world tour. But what happens when the leader meets the new girl?

✨

With the adrenaline still pumping through my veins from this whole morning, my leg starts to jiggle up and down waiting impatiently for my mum to pick up her phone. I could scream right now.

“Hello, darling. Are you on your way home?”

“Hi. Yeah I’m on the bus now.”

“Well, how did it go? Did they like you? Did you get it? Actually, tell me when you get back, ok? I’m just shopping at the moment.” I honestly feel like I could burst into tears, one: because I’ve just been running, which I never do, and two: the best news I could get after trying so hard to discover myself and where I want to be. I’m going on tour! Little old me is going to be playing to thousands of people worldwide!

“Ok. I’ll be home soon. Love you ma.”

“Love you too sweetheart.” We hang up and I could literally scream the roof of the bus apart. It seems too surreal to be true. After stressing so much this whole week about this audition, not being able to sleep and wondering what to play, it’s finally come fruition and a weight has just been lifted from my shoulders. The company came to London from South Korea for the auditions for new touring musicians for their groups, and now I’m going to be one of them! But the thing is, I have no idea what band I’ll be playing for or even when.

Later on that night over dinner, I tell mum of the events and some mishaps of everything that happened. She almost broke a rib or two pulling me into a hug when I told her that I would be officially touring with a band once I hear back from my agent.

“That is so exciting! My baby going into the world. I’m so happy for you!” She gives another big squeeze, swaying us from side to side just as my phone vibrates in my back pocket. “Oh! Who is it?” she asks before pulling away and cleaning up the dining table.

“I think it’s them. I’ll be right back. Hello?”

"Hello Y/N, it's Anna." My agent’s voice rang through the phone, easing the butterflies in my stomach for a moment.

“Hi Anna, how are you?”

“I’m very good! I also wanted to congratulate you on your audition today, they absolutely loved you! And we have a position lined up for you.”

“That’s great!” Already? That was quick!

“I just want to give you some more information about the success of your audition and going forward, within the company all travel and accommodation expenses are paid for so you don’t have to worry about anything. And, of course, if you have any insurance with your equipment we can help with that as well.“ This really is too good to be true! “With that being said, we would like to join us in Tokyo, Japan for the start of the tour.”

Wait. What? JAPAN?!

“When? Is there a date when I would have to be there for rehearsals? Sorry, I’m a bit jittery.”

“That is ok. Rehearsals will be on the eighteenth of this month but we would like you to spend some time with us and the rest of the band around the fifteenth.” My feet instantly carry me to my room where they stop in front of my calendar. That’s in six days! “You will have time to explore a little bit of Japan with one of our guides, you will also have your own hotel room set up, you will of course have the choice to explore the city on your own but in regards to security it would be...” I think I blanked out everything else Anna was saying. My ears were ringing, I was getting light headed looking around at all of my stuff in my bedroom. I’m going to Japan to start a world tour with a band I don’t even know. Six days. Six days until I leave my home to bed hop in hotel rooms around the world for god knows how long! “So, what do you say?”

Before I can even think about my answer, my mouth opens, “Absolutely!” Shit! How much stuff should I pack?!

“That’s great news! Before I go, do you have any questions you would like to ask?”

“Is it alright to ask, the band that I’ll be playing with or for...”

“Ah, yes! I thought you’d might ask. Usually we don’t disclose this information until closer to the time but since you signed a contract with the company and will be joining us very soon there are no issues. So you will be rehearsing and being a touring musician for Stray Kids.”

~

Six days came and went so quickly that I could barely focus on anything. I nearly forgot my carry-on luggage, headphones and even my iPad which has all the bass and synthesiser recordings on it. Luckily my mum helped me with the checklist, knowing very well that I will forget something, before leaving me at the airport with Anna. Speaking of whom, after a very long journey, we are on our way to the hotel in Tokyo, Japan. Each part of this experience is so fast-paced with no time to take in the huge shift this has made to my life that I almost cocoon myself in my hoodie in the backseat of the car, yet the Tokyo Dome won’t allow me to stay slumped for too long as Anna points out the venue from where we’ve stopped at the traffic lights.

“It’s huge!” I say to her in Korean, turning to Anna like an excited child seeing Christmas lights for the first time. She laughs at me. The thing about Anna is she’s also my agent as I was struggling to find any gigs in the past three years. The audition was like a big break for me to finally do something I love. She had also been the one to encourage me to learn Korean, when we first started talking while I attended college she had only learned the basics in English not too long before. So to save her more hardship and to learn something new, I took up a side quest to learn her language and she’s just embraced me and shares her culture with me.

“Wait until we get inside in a couple of days.” She says just as she goes to answer her phone. As we get closer, I pull on my Dr. Martens trying my best not to get dirt on the seat as well as getting concussed by the front passenger seat.

The butterflies are throwing up in my stomach.

~

I couldn’t close my mouth as I gawked out the window overlooking the whole of Tokyo. Every day since I’ve been here, I’ve done the same thing, wake up early to gawk at the sunrise, have breakfast, message my mum for a little while, stare out the window whilst getting dressed or brushing my teeth for my scheduled day with Anna, taking picture after picture of the tourist attractions. My legs hurt so much but it’s so worth it!

How am I here? Well, I know how but it’s like an out-of-body experience to be standing here in a hotel room, in Japan, on the same floor as Stray Kids. Rehearsals are tomorrow and my stomach is doing somersaults.

~

I’m still rubbing the sleep from my eyes, my body is too tired from the adventures I've had so far in the past three days to lug around my bass guitar on my back. I’m being lead through the maze of a hallway in the arena by a member of staff. Plus I hadn’t slept too well last night, I miss my mum, my cat, now I miss Anna but she’s a busy woman but I’m now left to my own sleepy devises at rehearsals. I had already met the rest of my band mates the other night over dinner. They’re so cool and so welcoming! I also met the stylists for tonight which woke me up a little bit more after seeing my outfits for the next week. Chef’s kiss!

The engineers help me with setting up my equipment and my ear pieces that there's no time to really take in the gargantuan size of the dome. I hear the drums, guitar and keyboard practising the moment I lock them in.

~

The members were getting ready to go to the stage, the stylists getting everything prepared for later on tonight, their manager rushing about making sure everything is all good to go for rehearsals, Bangchan was writing little messages to STAYS on Bubble with some comments making him smile and blush when out of nowhere, Han makes a noise in surprise which causes the others to look up at what he’s pointing to. Chan looks up to see Han gesturing to the TV that was switched on for background noise, it was filming live footage from the stage. Chan gulped down some saliva when he saw a new band member setting up.

Is it warm in here?

“Who’s that? Is that a new bass player NMixx?” I.N. asks while glancing between his phone and the TV. Chan knew the question was to no one in particular but he was taken back to respond. She was pretty, really pretty. The breeze flowing through her hair pushes some strands over her shoulder as the band plays a random tune, the boys stare in wonder only for a few seconds before the camera shot changes to a scope of the venue.

“She was pretty!” Han exclaims as he’s being set up with equipment for soundcheck and being handed a microphone.

“Stop staring!" Minho gently swats at Han, "You’re getting drool all over the carpet!” scuffing up Han’s bed hair, the member of staff helping Han adjust his monitor waiting patiently for them to stop slapping each other.

“Hyung,” Chan finally looks away from the TV too to see Felix holding his spare t-shirt. “Can I borrow this?”

“Sure, go ahead.” Who was she? He asks himself just as she comes up on the screen again. She looks over at the cameraman, shyly waving and smiling. Chan couldn’t help but notice the colour of her big round eyes. Uh oh.

“Wow! Never seen Chan-hyung with big heart eyes before.” Changbin says getting the boys attention, pumping his chest at his leader. Chan just glares at him, trying to keep him at arms length but ends up breaking into a red-faced laugh while chasing him around the room.

~

“If you need help with anything, give us a signal.” He says, making the gestures of signals but I get distracted when I feel eyes on me. I glance over the soundman’s shoulder to see the group of guy’s looking over at me. Through my ear piece just as one speaks into their microphone, I hear, “Hey! Hello.” One waves at me, followed by the others. He walks closer with a huge smile. “I’m Han and these guys are my friends." They each wave again. "What’s your name?” I introduce myself in Korean which surprises them and makes me laugh. “WOW! Oh, are you our new bass player?”

I nod, just as a song starts he jogs away.

"Let's get it!" We start with S-Class and go into Superbowl. The flow is so good! Me and the boys are really happy with it. I sort out my bass synthesiser for the next song just as another member comes into my peripheral.

“Hi.” I feel my cheeks grow warm as he smiles at me.

“Hello.”

“That was really good but I can’t hear the bass so well in my ...”

“Oh, yeah. They said they’ve been having minor issues with it but it should be better for tonight.”

“Cool! Err.... I’m Chris, by the way.”

“Y/N. It’s nice to meet you.” Is it really that warm out here?

“Hyung! Stop flirting with our new girl and get back here!” Minho yells away from the microphone causing Chan to shy away but ultimately wave at me with a ‘see you later’. Bangchan tackles Lee Know into a back hug with much retaliation.

This is going to be fun!

~

It’s been a couple of weeks since starting tour and it’s been amazing! Crazy busy with non-stop moving and airport travels and hotel bed hopping but other than that I can’t knock this experience. Especially since Stray Kids have taken me in. Almost every night we play, either Changbin, Han or mainly Felix come over and rock out with the band, hyping us up and wordlessly letting us know we were doing a great job.

Almost a month ago, I never would have thought I would be hanging with any of them, but usually Han comes over to play guitar with me playing songs before or after rehearsals. The chaos is real and it’s heart-warming to have so many people around who are so supportive and bring out the best chaos in you.

“Y/N noona?!” I glance up from my iPad taking out one of my airpods, I’m sat on the carpeted floor adjusting bass tones for the songs for the set to see Changbin sitting across from me, all dressed up for later on, which only reminds me that it’ll be my turn soon. Restless, full of bounding energy which he’s been told to save for tonight.

“Dwaeki?”

“Noona! I’m bored.”

“Where are the others?” I’ve only just noticed it’s just me, Changbin, I.N. and a couple of stylists in here. “How long have I been working?”

“Too long! Pay attention!” his whining makes me chuckle, I try to hide it to not upset him but he notices and starts getting irritable. “Stop laughing at me. I’m serious.” He starts smiling, not taking himself seriously.

“What do you want from me? What do you want to do?” he ponders for a moment.

“I don’t know. Help me!” while slumping his head on the table, he quickly retracts it with a small yet dramatic yelp in pain. I reach over to rub his forehead. He slaps the table as if offended which makes me laugh harder.

“Be careful Changbin! You want to be able to remember lyrics tonight.”

“Ah!” he pulls away with a sneaky look on his face. “NMixx.” He points to the live footage of NMixx on stage.

“What?” I ask as he quickly gets up and dances to the start of ‘Love Me Like This’. “I saw the video. You know it. Come on!”

“Absolutely not.” How did he know about that video?

“Noona! Noona! Noona!" I.N. starts chanting. Changbin pulls me up and before I know it, he’s filming us both dancing to the song, all while I.N. sits and watches. The others walk in just as me and Changbin finally finish. I must have gone red in the face when I saw Han and Bangchan just grinning.

“What’s going on?” Chan asks as I quickly go back to what I was doing before.

~

Changbin shows them the video of him and Y/N dancing along to NMixx. Bangchan sneaks a glance over at Y/N who’s too caught up in the new bass system that she’s been obsessed with for days now.

There’s a niggling feeling he just can’t shake off when he’s around her. He likes her a lot! She’s cool, amazing bass player and has a great flow with the band, she gets along really well the Kid's too. It’s like she takes care of them when he's too busy which gives him time to work or gives him a breather even just for a moment. She has a cool sense of style, right now she’s wearing her classic pink beanie, crop hoodie and black denim shorts and barefoot while sitting cross-legged at the table bobbing her head along to what she’s listening to whilst taking notes, there’s just something warm and natural about her. Even when she’s playing to thousands of STAYS, he’s always noticed that glow in her eyes while looking out at them, and her personality never changes. He recently saw a video shared around on TikTok of fans who had been watching our opening acts in quite an unbearable heat and while our set was being put together, she handed out extra water bottles for STAYS.

“Hyung?” Chan pulls his gaze away, not realising he’s probably been gawking at her for a bit, hoping that she didn't catch him doing it. He helps Felix adjust his necklace. “Hyung.” Chan hums in response to Felix as Y/N brings Seungmin his water bottle as he does his vocal warm-up just as Hyunjin tackles her in a side hug. “You’ve been quiet all day. Everything good?”

“Yeah. Really good.”

“You sure?” Felix asks peering over his shoulder with a little smirk, Chan couldn’t help but glance over at Y/N again to see her taking selfies with Hyunjin and Changbin. His heart flutters a little as she smiles at whatever Lee Know said about their poses which gets more of a response out of Changbin. “Why don’t you just tell her you like her?”

This brings Chan back to reality like a smack in the face.

“What are you talking about?” Felix gives him a knowing look. “I can’t just...do that. It’s complicated.”

“It doesn’t have to be complicated." Felix turns around to see Y/N giggling at Changbin and Lee Know bickering, nearly breaking out into a play fight. "She won’t break your heart, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Of course Felix would say that. The Kids practically adore her.

Lee Know keeps her at arms length but respects her and is fond of her, and her comebacks to his playful insults catch him off guard most of the time, they're not mean but just as good. Changbin see’s her like a sibling, and now a dance partner or someone he challenges when he tries to tease her because she’s our noona which sometimes makes her feel bad yet they have a special bond. Hyunjin has shown her more of his artwork, he even made her a picture for her birthday which she adores and she’s shown him how to create his own music. Han adores her because she works hard to help us sound better on stage and how caring she is to us. Felix, well he isn’t shy to the fact that they’ve become close friends and dotes on her. Seungmin, like Lee Know, shows a lot of respect for noona. And I.N., if any one of them follows her like a lost puppy, apart from Felix or Changbin when he’s in the mood to bother her or simply wants her attention, it’s him.

But where does that leave him? Chan breathes out a sigh. They get along really well but something feels stagnant. He isn’t worried about her breaking his heart though, he’s more worried he’ll explode with professions of adoration and scare her away.

~

“Where are you going?!” Chan calls out as Y/N hurriedly takes out her earpieces and takes off her equipment. The Kid’s keeping a distance from the firing line.

“Out for a walk! Is that ok with you?! God!” Y/N storms off stage, snatching her jacket from it's place on the bass holder on the way out. The others stare cautiously between the two, seven pairs of eyes following Y/N as she disappears around the side stage, then over to their leader who is almost red in the face. Rehearsals just finished but throughout the set, things just kept going wrong which ended up with the soundcheck taking longer than usual. If Chan were to name a few, the boys were more chaotic as usual but for some reason it just got to him today, then the sound system kept messing up which messed up their queues and they had to restart the song, Han and Seungmin’s microphones kept glitching, then Y/N said she had forgotten her iPad backstage which has all pre-adjusted bass tones on it, that was the final straw in the span of the two hours since the minor late start to rehearsals, that’s when Chan snapped. Not at everyone or anything, but at Y/N.

This confused the Kid’s so much after the new revelation they had witnessed over the past few months between their leader and their new bassist.

The air was thick with tension and it wasn’t great to be around. The members were silent, waiting for Chan to make the first move. He took a few breaths before turning around as he removed his ear piece from under his beanie.

“Sorry hyung.” Some of them mumble as he takes off as well.

✨

*So that was Part 1, I hope you enjoyed it! I know it's looooong but I haven't written anything like this in 3 years so I may have gotten a little excited or enthusiastic to get this out of my system*