#i hope the dude is feeling better tho 😔😔😔

[cherryxsapphic]

Mother Gooseberry babying/coddling y/n headcanons! Pretty please 🥺 I want to feel tiny

Absolutely!! Love bug ♡

to be honest with you, I've been really obsessed with outlast trials lately and has been playing non stop recently, because I wanna get to the second catalog!!

Warnings: blood, gore, injury, basic outlast stuff

→ you were certainly new to the trials pretty much stepping on every trap you could possibly find. Even though you didn't do it on purpose. It's just every time you would run from an enemy a trap would somehow be in front of you and you know what happens next. and also you got bullied a lot by the enemies, especially the giants and Coyle and also Franco. (broskis in his widowmaker era hitting me from across the map😔)

→ but anyways, when it came to Mother gooseberey, she was such a breath of fresh air. There was something about her that generally comforted you, as sick and twisted as that may be considering that she chases you around with a drill that is her father and has a real yapping problem and probably should be locked up for life if he wasn't actually dead rip. (We love him tho) but his daughter adores you and has pretty much made it in her brain that you're her baby, and that when she catches you you won't be able to escape from her grip!!

→ ok, and once she has you, you are literally spoiled with affection, it's everything from smooches, her literally carrying you, which is insane, considering she has only one free hand/arm, Her other arm is amputated and has the drill obviously. So, like, imagine, she's holding you with one arm, ok? both of your hands around her neck and you're just curled up in her side, and she just casually carrying you like its nothing.

→ so basically any affection that you could possibly think of she gives it to you, unless she's not capable of it of course. But she tries and also she has a tendency of hugging you so hard that you have to tell her that you need to breathe but ya know you'll be fine.

→ also, another scenario I'd like to imagine is, ok, imagine you're on that fancy bed that we all first see when we do the tutorial, for the very first part of the game. The exact same fancy bed that we have to hide under because of the psychosis dude. Ok, so Mother Gooseberry is laying down you're on top of her, your face is in her neck or in her shoulder/chest. Her hand on your back, and you're just essentially laying on top of her on your stomach, and you're just curled up, and she's rubbing your back and let me tell you, you had the best sleep you ever had since you made it to this facility.

→ also another thing I'd like to mention she is very over protective and possessive of you obviously your her baby, her little Angel that could do no wrong essentially. if you get injured somehow like really bad, bleeding, gash, basically the most horrendous thing that you could possibly think of or whether someone mess with you or you got hurt while just exploring the orphans/mansion (because who wouldn't) Phyllis thy Futterman will be drilling a bitch and who knows you might be able to watch her put a cute new face on one of her dolls/latest victims 🥰 (if your into that ofc)

→ and if your injured, she would gently bandage you up and if you ask nicely, she might even kiss it better. Also another thing, even Dr. Futterman went off the chain, even though he's been in bag jail alot for insulting you. Phyllis says he cares deep down, but whether that's true we'll never know.

Hi!! so if you made it this far, thank you!! I know I pretty much Yapped the whole entire time but I hope y'all enjoyed it!!

And also whoever requested this, I hope you like it and that it's up to your standards. ♡

[cuverale]

as it was - t.c

face claim: lily-rose depp

a/n: pls don’t think i hate taylor i adore her 🥹

Part 2 here | Part 3 here

enews

6,493,286 likes

enews looks like our couple is having happy time on their vacation 😍 Let us know what you think in comments!

view comments

timotheefan3 he should’ve been with taylor tho

timmyfan07 agreed!

randomuser yesss she is such a boyfriend stealer

ynfan59 she did nothing wrong u psycho

user47394 this should be taytay! They are end game periodt

ynmybaby lol nope.

taylorfan28 I don’t even know what he sees in her, like no beauty no talent NOTHING

ynfan2 stfu and leave y/n alone

timmyandtaylorr they’re right tho

timmytimmy parents 😍😍😍😍

ynsbabygirl i’m glad there is still persons like you tbh

timmytimmy we’re in this together sis! I love them. And timmy is obviously so in love with her 🥰

tayrussell my babes❤️❤️

*liked by enews

timotheefan13 girl nooo 😭😭😭😭

tayfan95 she stole ur man babe don’t say that

ynfan20 cuties 💖

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tchalamet

liked by yourusername, johnnydepp, tomholland2013 and 9,395,194 others

tchalamet ma meilleure moitié, before I made this post I called your mom and dad, and thanked them for bringing you to this life (I literally said “thank you for making her” because I was excited and I embarrassed myself but we won’t talk about that) thank you for making me a better man and giving me all the happiness I could ask for. You bring my life the light and colors I needed. And I can’t thank you enough for that. Keep shining my baby. I love you more than life itself. Happy birthday angel girl ♥️

view comments

timotheefan74 he calls her ‘my better half’ AAAHHH 😩💖✨

yourusername this made me cry 🥹

tchalamet from happiness i hope?

timotheefan10 lol bitch cry more

randomuser hahah yes i get so happy when you’re sad

yourusername je t’aime je t’aime je t’aime 🖤

tchalamet je t’aime aussi

yourusername my mom said she never heard something like this before and laughed

tchalamet i can’t look her face rn oh god 😭

zendaya HAPPY BIRTHDAY QUEEN!!

*liked by tchalamet and yourusername

user2947 lol queen of what????

username107 stealing 😂

randomuser48 bro seriously leave her alone it’s her birthday for god’s sake

user183 thank you for reminding us today is cursed 😔🙏🏻

ynmybaby HAPPY BDAY MY BABY! DON’T LISTEN WHAT THEY SAY ABT U WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH 💖💖💖💖

ynfan229 YESSSSS

randomuser19 talk for urself

ynsbabygirl fuck off then

timmyfan29 STAN QUEEN Y/N 🤍

randomuser0 she should’ve never born

user924 ugh 😒

username59374 make this day even better and kill urself y/n 😍

ynfan49 get help seriously

yourdadsinstagram I’ll admit that I was shocked when you called us but I’m glad really. Thank you for making my girl happy Timothèe.

tchalamet that’s why I’m here for sir 🫡

florencepugh Happy Birthday Y/n!!!!!

kendalljenner cutiesss 🥺

hulu her smile is the best thing 🥹

tayrussell Happy Birthday bestie i love you soooo much 😘

ynfan27 some comments even made me cry i hope y/n doesn’t feel sad abt this. It’s impossible tho

timmyfan1 i agree!! She doesn’t deserve this hate

username593 yes she does 😍

timotheefan49 you need help dude stop

timmytim19 the caption is too cute i can’t 😭🤧❤️

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yourusername

liked by tchalamet,zayn,taylorswift and 9,953,385 others

yourusername MET🖤

comments for this post are limited

tchalamet 🤯🤯🤯

chanel loved this look 🖤

taylorswift my girl🤍

tayrussell you look amazing!!!

hulu angel 🤎

ynmybaby OH MY GOD ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

pauline.chalamet hottest girl alive

florencepugh hot mamma 🔥

nicoleflender angel girl 💖

ynandtimotheeupdates

1,483,273 likes

ynandtimotheeupdates the way they look at each other 😩🥹

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timotheefan105 oh he is so in love with her

bonesandallfannn no he isn’t

user2943 god i’m so sick of them

ynhater break up with her already

randomuser42 dump her timmy boyy

randomuser204 i can’t even stand her ugly face

user5947438 🤢🤢

ynsbabygirl can y’all stop like wtf is wrong with you guys? Timothée and Taylor are just friends, they said that like million times already. Stop this shit, Y/n did nothing wrong she doesn’t deserve this hate she is getting.

user28472 yuck

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enews

3,373,262 likes

enews According to a close source, Timothèe Chalamet and Y/N L/N called it quits. They said it is because of the hate she gets and that makes her depressed and they can’t have a healthy relationship together. We are sorry for them.

the comments are limited for this post

timotheefan593 nooooooo 😭

randomuser483 god finally!!!!!!

ynmybaby i just hope y/n is ok.

timotheefan59 now get your queen taylor timmy

timmytimmy wtf is wrong with you

ynandtimmyy she deleted all their pic and unfollowed him 😔

ynsbabygirl but timmy still didn’t deleted the pics

timotheefan473 and he still follows her (he only follows her 😭)

taylorfan482 now he can be with Taylor!!!

tayrussell this is getting ridiculous. Timothée and I are friends and we are ONLY friends. You guys are sick. Y/n didn’t deserve that. And let me tell you something I was their matchmaker and I was proud. You guys need a therapist.

timotheefan583 I saw him at a cafe and he looked so damn sad 😔

ynfan63 I saw the paparazzi pics and god he looks devastated

timotheefan0 hope u guys happy now

tchalamet

liked by pauline.chalamet, kidcudi, benbarnes and 5,384,249 others

tchalamet taking a break from social media

the comments are turned off

yourusername’s story

[lovebvni]

i got love! (motivations)

oopsies my bad guys i know eyes r like scary to some people but for some reason, recently they’ve been a sign (the left is an older one from like a week ago, the right is from today) (that was as or typing the blog.. which was almost 2 weeks ago as it has been posted. i’ve seen more tho)

anyways! i wanted to make a blog on the things that have kept me going through the three years of being a reality shifter and working towards that goal of shifting

one thing i do want to say before we start, is the universe provides help, guidance and support when we’re feeling down. i genuinely believe i would not be this far into my shifting journey if it wasn’t for the universe + the tools they have given me. these are things that may also help you, but are not 100% guaranteed as we are different souls with different interests and understandings <3

anyways long blog ahead blah blah blah… 💀💀 LMAO OK

so, i’m neurodivergent and a really driven person. it isn’t easy for me to let things go either, but whenever i did feel like giving up or leaving shifting behind, here are some things i keep in mind.

love

wow i sound… dumb as hell 💀😔 LMFAOOSF OK BUT FR HERE i don’t have a good relationship w my parents, nor have i had… good experiences w exes (WHERE R MY BITCHES THAT ALWAYS FALL FOR THE TOXIC ONES🗣️💯‼️) anyways yeah. i remind myself that that’s the main reason i started this. i mean with love comes happiness, right?

2. my inner child

dude i feel like i’ve been having dreams abt shifting since i was a kid. i remember i was first introduced to daydreaming by my 2nd grade teacher, i’ve deffo had dreams abt being in different worlds, i’ve manipulated my daydreams, and more! there’s always been a “one-up” thing in this. dreams -> daydreams -> shifting. and i eventually learned/im learning how to do each of them.

i know i’ve been damaged since i was a child, i want born into a great place, but i can change where i am. plus, i’m someone who has always wanted to have superpowers n shit so like…. why the hell not?

3. friendships 🤭🤭

girl i lose friends like every other year, so why not have some i can talk to every day? i mean i wanna have fun, right? i want to be happy and talking to people and friends makes me happy

4. for others

dude i want people to be able to experience it he change, transformation and growth i have — along with sharing the successes. i believe every soul has the ability to change and mold into a better soul, so everyone should have that opportunity. i want to be able to teach and guide to goals and success. that’s one of the main reasons i stared this blog.

5. for understanding

i want to spiritually ascend, and get over my fears of it. so i want to experience it. that’s why im doing it, that’s why i do a lot of things. to experience and see the outcome.

that’s all i got for now! i may add to this blog, depending on what happens or if i think of anything else. but for now, im sleepy n i wanna get my drafts cleared. this is my last one 🤭

i love you all!! i hope this helps someone <3 666

[hollowsart]

Here are my thoughts on all the Doc Ock, and for the most part their voices, mainly.

If there are any doc ock I missed who have talking parts that I missed, feel free to let me know and I will edit this accordingly after checking them out:

60s: Doc Ock sounds like such an old man. It looks 30s-40s at best but he sounds 70-80 dhdnfnrjd I love him tho. He's so stupid (affectionate)

70s: sounds like he could have been a character on Batman 66 tbh... and that would be a compliment.

80s: SO WHINY. Baby rage. Sounds almost like an old lady. Poor dude, puberty did you no justice. 😔

90s: ..ah. This is the German Otto. My man. Your outfit is so... yikes. And your poor hair. My guy.. My dude.. plz.

The Sinister Six, game: oh.. oh this voice gives me Humongous Entertainment Games vibes.. the visuals are absolutely absurd tho LOL

2004: Hi Mr.Molina, sir. Hi. Where's your shirt? Awfully drafty scuttling around like that.. with your whole chest out.. like that.. easier and breezier? I can respect that.

2000 game: I think he needs to clear his throat and maybe take a nap. Not too many German Doc Ock's. Fascinating.

Enter Electro: holy crud, Doc. Very gruff and a little gravelly. Dang.

Spiderman 2 game: I didn't know you did 1920s Detective Noir villain voices. Sounding a little more unhinged here.. you good, Alfred?

Friend or Foe: Have you considered going into voice work as the narrator for movie trailers? I think it would be a better occupation.

2008: MARSHMALLOW BABY MAN BELOVED. YES. KILL. VIOLENCE. YOU WERE NEVER WEAK 💕

Shattered Dimensions: Ma'am..? Have we not learned from the past?

Total Mayhem: Hm. I uh. I don't know what to say, really.

Edge Of Time: Oh. Oh someone save this poor guy. It's ok Otto, you will get out of this safely and be able to take a nice long and well deserved vacation (I hope?? Is this man okay?? Someone tell me he's alright, I worry--)

Lego Marvel Superheroes: wow. Just. Wow. Saturday morning cartoon guy.

Ultimate, and Lego: Hi Tom Kenny. Hi. The heck are you doing here, my good sir?

PS4: Oh hey gramps. Sick arms. Love the wicked glow and the glowy claw tips

Ultimate Alliance: Nice voice. Maybe.. tone down the anger? I feel you get a lot of headaches from all the rage.. need a vacation, buddy?

Marvel's Spidey: Oh gosh. Oh gosh no. Hi uhh.. Hi Robin from Teen Titans? I... I don't... I don't like this.

Marvel Superhero Adventures: Oh my gosh. ...Oh.. My gosh. His voice. I love it. It's so stupid. Like a dumb stereotypical nasally high pitched German mad scientist. My word. I need more.

Spiderverse: OLIVIA. HI. HI OLIVIA. HEY GIRL. HOW ARE YOU? LOOKING GOOD, MA'AM!

Spidey and his amazing friends: ...Girl what. #girl ???

No Way Home: HI ALFRED. HI. WELCOME BACK, SIR. Glad to see you warmed up with a sweater! Love it! Looks cozy! Gotta stay comfy and classy when committing crimes against your will and better judgement! Are those transition lenses? Awesome! Very convenient!

[jayflrt]

Calling that there was an agreement where Jennie taps Hoon and Sujin taps YN to avoid the whole situation looking nepo baby and WHEN Hoon freaks about it then his brother is just going to frame it as him not trusting him again. The gas light is on people.

Heeseung you fishy little fish. I feel like Hee was probably once a decent guy but surviving in this world is not easy and he has begun to drift away from his previous frame of morality. He doesn’t want to admit to himself that he’s not that much of a decent guy anymore.

Controversial opinion but I feel (based solely on the evidence we have now) like Hoon is actually one of the most morally upright members of that group. His methods are NOT always great and he frequently loses sight of what is important, but my dude generally has pure goals and is not out to wreck people for fun. He is genuinely working for what he has. He is being bullied and manipulated by his family. He is a truly tragic character and fully deserves better. Hoping Yeonjun’s secret twin sister (or something) shows up and teaches him how to love like a human being. He genuinely deserves someone who cares about him. YN did but she was not the right person. Hoon needs a ball buster with a heart of gold. YN had the heart in spades but she didn’t have that pitbull streak that would really be needed to partner with this Hoon.

YN is a genuinely good person and she is strong in so many other ways. Hanging on to her morality and her compassion in that group is not easy feat but she has not bent to considerable pressure (both spoken and unspoken). It makes sense that someone looking to ruin her might need to resort to hiring outside help. Unlike many of the others in her group, she doesn’t have an immediately obvious exploitable weakness. I know she HAS made mistakes before and I fully believe those are going to come back in a big way. The stuff she wrote about Heeseung and the real reason for her fallout from Sunoo…I mean there is obviously something cooking there.

My theories are…that Hoon’s family might have something to do with hiring Jay. They need to secure a connection with YN’s family. It would be smart to have an insurance policy.

But to be more specific… if it is Sujin… Jay is the perfect insurance policy. He just needed Hoon and YN to drift apart, then he takes over the company and uses info from Jay to ensure that YN’s hospitals will be in business with the Hoon family company only if HE is CEO.

I really hope I’m not spelling Sujin’s name wrong. lol. But yeah this series is amazing.

OOH can't wait to see your thoughts on sungjin's motive reveal 🫣🫣 i totally agree with your take on heeseung too !! he's definitely wrapped up in trying to fit in with everyone else when he was once just like jay 🤧 (or, well,, mostly like jay LOL) and hoon def goes about most things the wrong way LMFAO 🤧 but he is genuinely focused on his goals and future !! it's only a matter of time until his family pushes him to a limit tho :(( HAHAH NOT YEONJUNS TWIN SISTER but bro does deserve love 😔 tho i don't think he has the capacity for it rn after how messy it was with mc

hot take i love mc too 🫶🫶 my soft spot for tragic characters and i wrote this story to be teeming with them MUAH and you're so spot on with her because she's got her secrets and hides them WELL 🧎‍♀️ doesn't even let her close friends into her priv because she's actually so reserved for someone who is forced to be a social butterfly

HAHAH *sungjin but you were close and his name only comes up at the top of the screenshot in a handful of chapters anyways !! 😩 and your theories are so intriguing to read 🫣 when we get to the ending im SO looking forward to reading back on these 🥰 also i'm so so glad you like the series 🥹💖 it's always such a joy to read what you have to say !! i hope you're doing well ml and having a great day/night 🫶

[kitten4sannie]

groupie anon is back to say that that seonghwa fic.... ngl I was so anxious about them going at it in reader's workplace but you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes. ALSO I READ THE YUNHO ASTRONAUT ONE- I... that was not very cash money of you ngl.

You deserve to be hyped up um??? giving us all this for FREE?? (my broke uni student self thanks you, on my knees, bowing to you like the angel you are).

also don't mind if you find this account hahah, i just like being groupie anon hehe. I already made my kpop account but I'm waiting to write that fic first before I start being active on it!

honestly, your response to my idea was so wholesome, I might cry. I planned on going home and watching the lectures I've missed while I was in class, but uni can wait. sannie sick fic cannot. I will birth it today no matter what. NO MATTER WHAT.

I got into ateez a bit late but they're one of my ults along with seventeen, but sannie has been a consistent bias. I like to say I don't really have biases and it changes everyday, but san.... he's... yeah. he's made a home for himself in my head. living rent free. slay. but no seriously I'm dtf any day, any time, anywhere. however he wants. I would do questionable things for that man. ehem. moving on. I'd crawl on the floor like a dog and- ANYWAY... other than san though, the rest kind of fight for the bias position everyday.

us as public penpals??? shut up that's so fjfufbhs CUTE im melting. I can't wait to write that fic now hahaha.

thank you for your kinds wishes, I really hope uni goes easy on me this year :").

I hope all is going well for you!!! until next time :* (maybe next time would be through my actual account, rather than as groupie anon! ^^)

heyyyy yeah i feel like the reader’s going to be having a meeting with her boss whenever she gets back sjhsdgd ohhh the astronaut yunho one 🥺 yeah that was the exact opposite of cash money i hurt my feelings so much after i wrote that ;;; but that kind of angst hurts just right sometimes 💔

it may be for free but i get paid in praise so that’s a win in my book 💕 hshdhd don’t awaken anything in me nowww and i’m def not an angel in any capacity more like a goblin that sits in its den and writes filth in the darkness loll.

i have some ideas but i’m not completely sure! oooh okay i can’t wait till you start posting! awwh haha i just really liked that concept you came up with it’s just so insanely fluffy and domestic i want to cry happy tears 🥹 ahhhhh sick sannieeee i can’t wait to read it!! i’m so excited dude

ooh seventeen i like a lot of their music! i can’t pick a bias tho there’s just too many and my mind can’t make a decision jshhs but vernon tho… that man could get it. who’s your seventeen bias btw? yeah i feel that in my bones like san is just something else like i could write a 10 page mla essay on why i love him and how delusional i am for that man but i won’t for everyone’s sake 👍🏼 “crawl on the floor like a dog” FOULLLL but same like where’s the leash? it’s time for walkies - i’m just gonna stop talking now… but same i can’t pick where it comes to the rest of them they’re just too powerful 😔

it is really cute huh??? i’m so glad you decided to send me an ask bc i’m loving this! but if you wanna dm too i’m 100% down for that <3 you’re welcome and i hope it does too hang in there and just take it one day at a time <3 it’s def not the best but it’ll get better soon! oooh sounds good i’ll be looking forward to your next ask 💕

[taegularities]

Hiiii Rid, I had another dream again. Yes hi it’s me dreamgirl. I swear they just happen??? So I wanted to tell you before I forgot it.

So it starts with me trying to buy tickets for a Seventeen concert and then actually succeeding. And then when I’m getting ready for the concert, I double check the tickets and it turns out I bought tickets for a beauty product launch???? But hey, they’re giving away wine and cheese (I don’t drink😔) AND a bottle of their new eel serum ig??? yes… eel

So yeah I’m suddenly having a shitty day because I guess I wanted to see Kim Mingyu with his titties out??? (OKAY BEFORE YOU ASK WE R GETTING TO THE BTS PART I SWEAR)

So I go to my classes (I guess the scene switched lmao) and continue this shitty mood and sit next to my classmate Park Jimin and his super smart and stuff and suddenly we’re having a quiz on food safety??????? Hello when did I start studying food related modules? I remember panicking because they wanted us to calculate the sodium content of a chicken breast. Like WHY DO I REMEMBER THAT SPECIFIC QUESTION FROM MY DREAM QUIZ.

And Jimin, my lovely seatmate Jimin is sitting in a way so I can’t copy his damn work, like dude is covering is work with his whole body smh and the kid opposite me is just highlighting their entire sheet so I’m panicking because I don’t want to fail but then all hell breaks lose in the class and we get a power cut and the lecturer is standing on a desk yelling about notebooks and I’m so upset because what a shitty day AND THEN everyone goes quiet and coos because

OUTSIDE MY CLASSROOM IS MY MFCKING HUSBAND AND HE IS HOLDING OUR (HIS) MINIMES AND EVERYONE IS LIKE “Awwww”

And yes… it’s none other than the love of my life Jeon Jungkook and I remember him wearing that one outfit from an episode of Run BTS (they’re at that Hyundai museum I think?? He had a jeans and Prada boots) and the youngest baby is dressed like him except his shoes were silver? idk idk. And the slightly older but still cute and adorable son is wearing like this floral overalls with a matching bucket hat but he’s cute as heck and they’re all waiting for me with their big doe eyes and the babies with their chubby cheeks and my day feels so much better and then I guess I woke up but suddenly I miss my dream babies that I had with my husband Jeon Jungkook😔😔😔

I’m sorry I know this dream is not as entertaining as the others lmao but I suppose you dream what you dream hehe. Anyway lovely, I hope your day is going well and you’re doing good and just know that I adore you and your writing and your kindness too!! 💗

dreamgirl !!!! c'mon, all your dreams are entertaining as fck, even this one made me smile (as always) :') first of all, dang it, what's with the svt concert tickets tho 😭 cheese n wine are great but.... 🤨 i hope the eel serum... was a good one, though :')

food safety 💀 i do wonder what your brain was trying to tell you... i also wonder why meanie jimin wouldn't let you copy his answers, like help out a girl in need, mister park 😔 and you know what? i can understand all the tumult that came after, bc I'D REACT THE SAME IF JEON JUNGKOOK WAS STANDING OUTSIDE, especially this one.

DREAM HUSBAND AND DREAM BABIES, dreamgirl i'm actually so happy for you and that you had this whack yet endearing dream 🥺 floral overalls with a bucket hat... sounds like jk fr 😭 i think even i had a jk dream last night, but can't remember anymore :')

and lovely, my day went well, i was out most of today, thank you so much 🥺 i hope yours was pleasant, too, and that your mind thinks up another cool dream tonight !! i luuufffff you, you're the kindest <33333

[mushywutty]

I hope you feel better from the dream, I have nightmares a lot and it's so hard to move on from it sometimes :(

Idk if this will take your mind off of it, but I did a quiz for funsies yesterday of my slasher movie role and I got final girl and I thought of final girl turned killer and it reminded me of Adel a lot.... (I really want to marathon the Scream franchise now...)

If you want to share some brainrot about slashers aus or any brainrot in your mind for that matter I would gladly listen with peak interest :) (I love your aus and ideas)

With love, 🗣️ anon

and hi again my little 🗣️ anon- ( as u can see i just went thru stages of anger LMGOAOZJDJDFJJEJE )

i have a bunch of dreams but also a buncha nightmares but tbh i havent had any big ones in a while so it fucked me up real bad bc EVERYTHING and everyone was fucking with me so bad in there 😔🙄🙄💥

anyways , slasher aus my beloved <333 i guess normal au COULD be considered slasher/paranormal au? adel doesnt have to fight for her life in it yet tho so hmmm...im trying to think of a slasher au for her but i love my three sillies too much to have her kill them off 😔😔‼️but if i HAD to- NO WAIT . wait i just thought abt something but its giving away my lore TOO MUCH ( meat the real one knows abt it lol )

if i had to, i guess id do something related to her ex. kinda like in i spit on your grave? went through SO MUCH shit with ONE fuckass dude, manages to escape even tho most of those who tried to help died... goes to take on her revenge on the asshole only to meet three particular fellas!

or some shit i dont fffffucking know 🙄🙄... my brain is a little mush rn tbh so im like blegh????!!!! .. that idea kinda sucks but basically , yeah.

the only moment adel would be out for BLOOD for them, would be their ' cannon ' meeting? im talking demon adel first meeting them. escaping tobys crazy hatchet throwing skills; hoodies fucking shooting skills ( later on in they compliment each others shooting skills lol ) and ofc, maskys brute ass force - reminder that he BEAT her fuckint ASS when they first met LMFAO -

masky realizing theyd have to work with her from now on as he watched her bruised swollen face slowly heal : fuck me and my stupid baka life.

BLEHHH IDK IM SPEWING SM BULLSHIT RN LMFAO SORRYYYYY

[sunnisurrealism]

Hi Timothée,

I can’t even describe how I feel. Today the package with the first USB arrived at my house, the day after I left for Calgary. So I officially know you didn’t get it 😞😖😔I accidentally said in the video below it arrived yesterday but I meant to say his morning while I was still sleeping. My Timothée, I am so so soooooo sorry. I had no idea. I shouldn’t have lost the tracking receipt and I shouldn’t have put on so many weird stickers. I have no idea why it didn’t send, maybe I was just being naive and the stickers made it look sus. For some reason god decided this. I’m really fucking concerned my roommates will know this package was for you but I forget it I put your full name on it and I don’t know if they’ll google Jessica Kolstad out of curiosity. Either way I’ll look like a fucking weirdo. Timothée I am so so sorry I had no idea your German cream never arrived after those memes that is so fucking ironic. God is making this more painful for you. I really don’t know why it would’ve been denied at the border. I just cannot even grasp my mind if you flew out to LA for nothing. You must have been infuriated. It must have wasted a lot of your time. Jesus. Dude I am so so sorry idk why it didn’t work. I feel like a fucking idiot. My Timothée I am so so so sorry. This next package was less conspicuous but still slightly weird tbh but not as alarming omg what is my problem. Okay I really hope this one arrives. Can you please make a post indicating whether it has? 😔😔😔I am so sorry My Love.this is also problematic cuz I probably talked to you assuming we were on the same page based on what I talked about in the voice notes on that usb. Oh whatever fuck it. I’m rly in shock. At least we know now. I really fucking hope this next one isn’t returned when I’m gone because I put your name on it and my roommates will be concerned at me. Whenever I make jokes about you around them it’s awkward af. Fml 😖 I kept the tracking receipt for this latest mail. It’s too bad I’m always sending mail right before I’m off to Victoria or Calgary and that I don’t have my shit together more to be more organized😔 these past few months have been really stressful tryna deliver for you tbh. I still want to obviously but it’s hella stressful for me. idk what happened but I would recommend informing the agency to always keep an eye out for mail from my name. I know it’s revealing your secrets if they don’t know already I mean but I’m wondering if I didn’t put your name on it or something maybe they didn’t know what to do with this weirdo package? Idk I forget. fml. Oh well. Technically this is plot stuff and no one was physically hurt, tho your blue balls truly must be on another level now 😔 everything moves so slow in the sim movie. I’m sure you realized god was testing you and it’s not my fault. Jesus tho. Im going to try my hardest to figure out why it didn’t send to try to prevent this from happening again. I’m so sorry my king.

Last night I dreamt it was the beginning of our relationship and we were hanging on a bed with all our friends. We wanted to kiss and thought it would be better to go somewhere more private but we couldn’t help ourselves and started making out 🫠 it was like our first time 🫠 I was beneath you and your were crawling on top of me while kissing me and your tongue felt so nice against mine, and it was really overwhelming but I liked it. I was trying to pull your groin into mine but you were teasing me and I was upset. But you couldn’t lean into mine because your friend or pr people were pulling you back cuz you were late to a photo shoot. And then you were off and away. Commercial vibes. I was sad cuz we were just getting going 😭

I also dreamt I was in Ansbach, my “ancestral” hometown in Germany. There was lots of construction and I was trying to go through it to get to the Altstadt, the old town. I was visiting and deeply wanted to see the old cobble stone streets (wanting to see old streets in Europe is a reoccurring dream of mine). I got past the construction and noticed a weird man I had seen in Ansbach before and thought it was crazy locals recognized me even tho I didn’t live there. I also saw young people improv playing in a park by the River, with beautiful costumes, just for themselves. I thought, Ansbach low key has very cool culture happening here, I should definitely bring Timothée here. People were taking Venetian gondolas down the river deep into the streets to access the altstadt. Don’t worry Timothée, one day I take you.

Again, I’m feel so fucking insane disappointed today. I really can’t believe it. I’m really fucking praying this next one will send. I still need to figure out why the first didn’t. I’m really sad about all this, I’m so so sorry Timothée. This is some karmic thing from the gods I don’t understand. Bless up and I’m so sorry again and I’ll try to be better next time.

[lqfiles]

DUDEEEE i was just going to re-read your works (need comfort because it’s been a couple of rough days as an army ✊🏼😔) (also, DONT ATTACK ME IM NICE PLSSS 😭😭)

but i would take jisung’s cookies too tf 😒 literally i wouldn’t even answer and would grab em, snatch em, and eat them in front of his face idcccc (this part tho made me laugh tho bc i would accidentally steal someone’s food too 😭 i embarrass way too often)

AND noooo knowing everyone in the neighborhood is having everyone know your business!! everyone talks shit about everyone so i gotta stand on business (cue my rbf because as much as i can easily befriend people, im shy 🥲)

ALSO I CANT WAIT FOR MORE? you write your characters so beautifully, im in love and i can’t wait for more 😩 literally every update is a little surprise hehe

(i noticed this btw but excuse the fact i say literally, dude, and like a lot, im from california and it’s a habit 😔🤞🏼)

- 🫧

(Bella has a little photoshoot today 🤭)

(it’s okay you’re one of the tolerable ones you’re my fave army ❤️🙏🏽) anyways that makes me wanna reread some of my stuff too now oh my god i love feeling the nostalgia, let me go and check my first few works out 😭

I FEEL LIKE IM THE TYPE TO MISTAKE THAT TOO like someone stretches their hand out with some food towards me while talking about i’m gonna assume they’re offering me food like.. MY BAD!

I DISNT EVEN CONSIDER THAT OOOUUU i just know drama gets passed around quickly over there 😭😭😭 you better stand on business and keep your OWN business to yourself and hope your fam does too 🙄

thank you bae 🥺 tbh the first few chaps aren’t THAT interesting as they haven’t properly met yet but i already wrote up to chap 6? 7? AND FHATS WHEN RHEY WILL PROPERLY TEXT SO ITS ONLY UP FROM FHERE 😝😝😝

if that’s how Californian people talk i might be californian because i can’t go a sentence without saying ‘like’ and literally’ and ‘bro’, CALIFORNIAN SISTER!!!!! ALSO AWWWEEE THATS SO CUTE pls tell me how the shoot went 🥹🥹🥹 i bet she’s gonna look so cute

[notfivefr]

☆ [vn game] : : A Date with a Death — i finally finished it, 3/5 ★

OVERALL, ok la. im not into romance sgt but the angst is still good hehee. This game is abt the mc suddenly has to installed this chatroom in her laptop and the one use it, are her and a grim reaper who demand to take her soul in 7 days. Everyday we keep chatting there, develop feelings and stuff. I believe it has like 5 endings? Not sure. I kinda enjoy it tho bcs the grim reaper is not acting creepy like a fboy (i despised that kind of ml) (my definition of fboy is the one that donno boundaries or consent, flirting profusely is okay), he wants to be cool so bad it's so silly (affectionate).

Romance vn game made me realize I'll never take flirting seriously but also why i keep getting bad ending first? Ofcz i died on the first try 😭

ok but the confession hits ngl, i feel pity for him (my dude named Casper). But what can i do, im gonna die anyway, better not incline towards any hope, i dont wanna hurt him ✋😔 (GIRLL HE'S NOT REAL)

Not go thru all endings yet, maybe ill do it next time. (or gonna look into spoilers instead idk)

☆[Fav scene] I like the artstyle tbh

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

RAYHSIIisushshjdiJWJWISIH MY SLEEP SCHEDULE IS SO MUCH BETTER NOW?!?! I'VE BEEN GOING TO BED AT AROUND 7 PM, AND WAKING UP A 6 AM?!?! LIKE EVEN ON THE WEEKENDS? BRO. BE PROUD OF ME PRAISE ME RN!!! BUT ANYWAYS, I'm feeling SO much better 😋 I think I might make that cheesecake thing I mentioned a few anon asks ago today, and probably clean up a bit. I admit I really let the place go for a sec, dishes have unfortunately piled up a bit 😔

ALSO HELLOOOOO??? MEGUMI AND Y/N?? BRO Y/N NEEDS TO STOP THINKING THAT MEGUMI IS ALWAYS AFTER HER!! 😭😭 POOKS LIKE I GET IT, BUT DAMN?? WTH HAPPENED FOR YOU TO HATE HIM SO MUCH, AND HAVE YOU BELIEVE THAT HE HATES YOU SO MUCH TO THE POINT WHERE HE WOULD WANT TO EMBARRASS YOU?? 💀 I'm SO invested. I woke up a few hours ago and saw that you had posted 2 yesterday, but I was like "its still late so I'm taking my happy ass back to bed, I'll read it when I wake up". It's the first thing I did when I arose from my slumber.

Also the boyfriend thing, he at least acts lovey sometimes, but yeah I get what you're saying 😔💔 I just really REALLY love him, and he'll express his love from time to time. I just don't know if he likes me or is just playing me, it'll be 4 months on the 11th, so I'm hoping that this is just one of those relationship phases and we'll work on it or something 😭 We've been okay for the most part tho, idk relationships are difficult sometimes, but I'm more than willing to go through more than difficult for him 😞 Bro has me folded like I've never been before? Help?

PLEASE THOUGH MY FRIEND AND TEACHERS DYNAMIC IS SO WEIRD?? SHE LITERALLY CALLS HIM A LITTLE GAY MAN 😭 HE LETS HER TOO? SHE EVEN INVITED ME INTO A GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO CALL HIM THAT? 💀 She sees him as an older brother, and I could see why, he lwk acts like this other dude I know 😔 I miss you W 💔 But anyways, it's just funny to see them go back and forth with eachother 💀

ANYWAYS. 💀💀 What's your favorite song? 🤔 Tbh I couldn't tell you mine, not that anything is wrong with it, I just FR can't decide what my favorite song is 😭 Having a hard time deciding my favorite color too 💀

ANYWAYS GONNA CLEAN (if I dont procrastinate) SO GOODBYE MY DEAREST AXEL

XOXO 👽

YAYAYYAYA SO PROUD OF U BAEEE!!! SO GLAD UR SLEEPPING SCHEDULE IS GOING GOOD! I HOPE CLEANING GOES WELL N UR CHEESE CAKE COMES OUT YUMMY 😎😎😎

NAH FR LIKE HAS YN EVER THOUGH MAYBE HE ISNT DETERMINED TO MAKE THEIR LIFE A LIVING HELL LIKE THEY THINK HE IS?? 😭😭

bae… idk… i’m still team break up with him even after reading that… cause i feel like it’s usually the opposite four months in where they were rlly sweet before and NOW they’re showing their true colors but also fuck do i know i’m not in ur relationship so take what i say with a grain of salt if u want… DO WHAT U THINK IS BEST ILY !

HELPPP NOT A LITTLE GAY MAN LFMOAOA THATS SO SILLY

ermmmm …. yeah i cant decide either… i love so many songs and i feel like i’m betraying them if i only pick one of them😭😭😭😭

[commanderquinn]

Good Space Chapter 3: Hey Gringo

! i dont! keep these posts! updated! like i do! ao3!

that means you're going to find typos and shit (and possibly minor detail changes) that don't match the ao3 version! that's because im not going to bother fixing the tumblr posts until i finish good space as a whole. im only uploading them here as a backup tbh

—

master list / ao3 chapter link

—

warnings: ayyy!! none this time!! unless you wanna count Highly Disrespectful Thoughts ❤️ tho!!! the flashbacks are shuri, heads up for anyone who is a big baby (like me) and still crying over WF. also (shocker) bucko angst/panic attacks

song: it KALEO time!! istg there are golden oldies and hippie classics on this intended playlist, we just havent gotten to them yet. this choice is mega self-indulgent on my end ngl, buuuuut thats the whole fic in general lbr (side note: every time i write Angy Ava, i want you to imagine the vocal intensity of jefferson airplane’s lead singer, grace slick)

the timing of this chapter could NOT have been better with the probably-russian hackers knocking out ao3 that long. i mean it dude, im pretty sure the universe had a good chuckle over this one bc i sure as shit had to sit here and go “youre pullin my leg bud”

also now feels like a good time to mention, for absolutely no reason in particular (definitely not bc of Bucky being a Huge Simp this chapter), that i hc bucky as a dom with service top leanings. i just didnt wanna give the impression that reader is dom for this and accidentally get anyones hopes up with no payoff. i try to avoid that as much as i can bc god knows i drop Big Honkers on y’all every damn chapter, id hate for you to get all the way to the end of this and not get your cookie, y’know? (i am, ofc, down to write mega sub bucky for smut-shot requests)

also remember when i mentioned giving ava a HANDFUL of physical details for writing fuel? 🌝 (ur gonna think im funny rlly soon, dw)

anyways if you dont have adhd, good luck and god speed with the idiots thinkin abt each other in this chapter ❤️ im so sorry in advance 🥺😔

—

Febuary 17th, 2015

"Good morning, Sh—"

"Have you left your worthless husband yet?" Shuri impatiently taps a finger against her elbow, where her arms are crossed over her chest. 

She watches Ava sigh on the other end of the vidcall. The woman looks too tired. She needs rest. Shuri wants to stab Alec all over again. She's going to make a new, self-lacing, possibly electrified dagger just for the occasion. "I know you're just trying to—"

"We can come to get you. I will send T'Challa. You must promise me that you will have him get me something from Washington." Shuri raises a stern finger, pointing it directly at the camera. "Do not let him pick it out himself—"

"Shuri, honey, I love you with all my heart, but please—"

"I want you to pick it. The furniture in your office is ridiculous; I want something like that."

A smile far too small pulls at the corners of Ava's lips. Her smile used to move freely, and it will do so again if Shuri has any say in the matter. Which she does. "Well, thank you, I work very hard to keep it ridiculous. Now—"

"It will make me think of you whenever you are not around to make fun of my brother with me. My mother will get the lawyers you need to start your divorce—"

"I—sweetheart, please, it's been a very long night—"

"It is the afternoon where you are. You have not even had breakfast, have you? Of course not. You are busy doing the work while Alec—"

"Shuri!" Ava puts a hand over her eyes and takes an unsteady breath in. "I'm sorry. This is—it's been a long night. I didn't mean to yell at you—"

"You need to start yelling much more, Ava. Aim it at your worthless husband while you tell him you are leaving," Shuri argues, entirely fed up with how the doctor allows the spineless dickhead to make her miserable. "T'challa will remove him for you while you stay here with us."

Alec—she refuses to call him Ryder; the man does not deserve to have taken the doctor's name—leans into the camera view, his expression bored. Dismissive. Shuri wants to smash his wrinkling, greasy face in with her fist. "While I appreciate the offer, your majesty, my wife and I can handle our private life alone."

Shuri glares back at him, one of her eyebrows hiked as far up as she can comfortably get it. "Do you really think being aware of your presence on this call will deter me from reminding my friend that you are a demon?" She looks pointedly at Ava, who's still covering her eyes. "He is a demon. A pasty, rude demon."

"Alec is going to shut the fuck up now, I promise." The fingers over Ava's eyes pull in until she's pinching the bridge of her nose tightly. She looks as if she's fighting off a migraine. She probably is. And it is Alec's fault. "That way, we can get this over with, and I can finally get some sleep—"

"Which you need and are not getting enough of." The words slip out before Shuri can stop them. 

Ava's shoulders deflate slightly. Her hand drops, and she attempts another smile that doesn't reach her eyes, making Shuri feel a pang of guilt. "No, I'm not. But I will, just as soon as we finish the basic adaptation matrix. I promise."

Ava always encourages her to speak her mind, no matter what. Sometimes it gets her into trouble. She is not looking to berate her favorite Canadian; she loves leaving the vidcomm between their labs on. The open connection is a comforting window into the outside, one that lets Shrui indulge in any question or raving that passes through her mind. 

Alec is a poison in her friend's life, and Shuri will not back down from reminding her of that. But mother and Nakia have sat with her over this, explaining that sometimes, an abused heart will cling to what hurts it. They have to be supportive while Ava works through this. She's getting there. Just not nearly fast enough for Shuri's patience.

Father has been reminding them all that Alec is a risk, given what he knows. Trusting Ava means trusting her for the duration, and they can't go back now. If she says she is handling the issue of separating the man from her work, they have to allow her room to do that. But T'Challa has been ordered to keep close, or at the very least, ready to go.

As much as she despises Alec, Shuri does not wish to see Ava hurt in this. Not any more than necessary. She is also not interested in trying to control her friend the way her mother sometimes tries to control her. It is infuriating. 

So, taking a deep breath and squaring her shoulders, she lets some of the fight leave her. For the sake of Ava, not the pasty demon. "I have the latest build ready for transfer." 

"You're sure you've secured the connection on your end?" Alec has the audacity to question, even outside of the frame. "I'm not interested in spending my week chasing traces of this—"

"Do I look as if I will hesitate to strike you, colonizer?!"

—

"I'm just saying, Humpty Dumpty."

"Fuck off," Bucky wheezes at the billionaire, compressing the towel he grabbed from his new medkit against his ribs. Why he expected to make it through his first mission back without having to crack it open, he's not entirely sure now that he's sitting in the hindsight. Getting shot today was, if he's honest with himself, entirely predictable. It's his luck, after all. 

"We let you out of the house again for five minutes, and you've already broken yourself." Tony shakes his head as he tsk's, making Bucky roll his eyes lazily. "What's Ryder going to think? If you keep this up, you'll give the woman a complex about draining your mojo."

"She's going to think I throw myself in front of armor-piercing rounds for idiots that don't notice when they're being shot at." The mention of Ava brings the doctor's smiling face to the forefront of his mind. Bucky leans back against the Quinjet's co-pilot seat, letting his eyes fall closed. 

He could take care of this latest injury himself. That's what he usually does. Thanks to the serum, all he has to do is keep the wound clean for a few hours while his body stitches itself back together. Nothing's broken, and he'd be in much more pain if anything were punctured. Hell, he'd probably be dead already. The fix for this is so easy it'll practically handle itself.

"You always get so cranky after you've played the hero." He hears Tony kick his feet up on the Quinjet's main controls. "Take a breather. Maybe a bow or two. Believe it or not, it's possible to accept a compliment now and then."

"Grandstand more often, got it."

Ava's probably going to hear about today's incident now that Bucky thinks about it. If anything, Steve's going to make sure of it. He doubts she'd guilt him for not being comfortable with an optional trip to medical. They've been having more conversations about boundaries and comfort, and she's been unwaveringly supportive of him moving at his own pace. 

"You don't have to grandstand, you gigantic baby," Natasha chides from between the chairs. Her hand smacks against his shoulder, making Bucky grunt softly. "A whole new world is going to open up for you when you relearn to accept praise."

Tony snorts, long and loud. "Has he reached that stage of modern education yet?"

"I reached that stage of education before you were born, Stark." Bucky's not territorial over his reputation anymore; those days are long since passed. The grand majority of his mojo got left in the 40s. He's just tired of Tony's shit. That's all it is.

He shifts uncomfortably in his seat. Ava might feel bad that he didn't come to her for something like this. He doesn't... want that. He doesn't want her thinking that he doesn't welcome her help or that he doesn't trust it. He... he does. He doesn't just appreciate having the option; he enjoys it. The new routine is a breeze, and his neck feels better than it ever has. At least that he can remember.

"I'm confused," Tony mumbles around a mouthful of snacks. The man never stops eating. "Are we talking about your no-no years, or did you and Rogers hit up underground bars before Germany?"

"I know all his secrets from the vanilla days; they never went to any of the fun ones," Natasha confirms. It's not like Bucky was going to take the verbal bait anyways. Steve still falls for it regularly. 

"I like how you don't deny having the rest of the answer; I feel like it tells me all I can tolerate about the icicles when it comes to this. That's my favorite part about you, Romanoff. You know when I don't need to know, you know?"

His dumbass friends might as well be background noise with Bucky's mind this firmly in the memory of Ava's office. She's been so good to him, especially over this last week while she pushed through all the red tape for him. He'd been expecting it to take an eternity of hounding Steve all by his lonesome, but she got him back in the field in under two weeks. His best friend had actually been kind of pissy about it behind closed doors. For Bucky, it was like getting sprinkles on top of his cake. 

He's been thinking about getting flowers delivered to her lab for the trouble. It feels like too much whenever his thumb hovers over the confirmation button. He's reached the part of staring at the order details four times.

"I'm pretty sure your country doesn't appreciate it as much as you do. They tend to fight cold wars over it."

"Well, yeah, but our country—you see what I did there? That was a pretty funny communism joke. And it works as a reminder for both of us that you're actually an American citizen these days; isn't that wild? Back to the point here, our country fights wars over stuff we do ourselves all the time, so that doesn't feel like a fair reason to dismiss our friendship."

The doctor's forcing him to expand his music library. Her taste there is as scattered as her taste in movies, but she's got some leading themes he's been able to pin down. The 60s and 70s are huge for her, expectedly, and she's got a lot of nostalgia over the 90s. Paige keeps her versed in all things pop, folk, and country, according to her. 

"If I start referring to the US as my country, you people will expect me to do things like register to vote. Or put up wallpaper."

"I don't think anyone's expecting you to be legally allowed to do that. The voting thing, not the wallpaper. In most states. For multiple reasons. Although, the wallpaper might be a good call."

Ava invited him to their absurdly large archive of playlists during his second session. The ones Paige curates are nothing but insanity. Not one of them makes a lick of sense. Bucky decided that he should have expected that, given her Energizer Bunny reputation. Ava's are less scattered; more organized. Soothing for his mind to digest. He's been using them as workout music ever since. And driving music. And general background noise. 

"I don't think I'd know where to start buying wallpaper. Do you even want me putting that shit on your expensive building?"

"Not really, but the idea of walking in on you rolling paste on the living room walls is worth anything it could take to fix them later."

God, she's funny, too. He could listen to the woman's awful, soul-crushing puns and subsequent cackling for hours. He'll never say that to her face, not for as long as he lives, but they've made him feel lighter every morning that he's gone to let her work him over. He's already stolen two of them to torture Sam with. Another thing he's not going to tell her.

"Maybe I should start smaller. Bruce keeps suggesting a car that has legal registration."

"Heeey, that could work. You'll be signing up for mailing lists and bitching about state tax in no time. You know what?" He hears Tony snap his fingers. "We should get you a houseplant. Work you up to having a fish or something."

Alright. Maybe he'll go to Ava. He doesn't want her to think he's trying to blow off her expertise again. Or that he's avoiding her. He's not; he really does like hanging out in her office. Even if it's technically a medical appointment. He's a lot more eager to visit her than his therapists, that's for sure.

"I am not paying taxes," Natasha scoffs. "If you think I'm tying a legal address to my name, you're out of your fucking mind. Moreso than usual."

"You don't think you'd enjoy having a cave to lurk in?"

"What makes you think I don't have one already?"

"I'm talking about a real house, not a safe house."

This injury isn't related to his cybernetics. It's his ribs, well below any of his implants. He's not entirely out of the loop when it comes to what doctors have to do to get their licenses. She no doubt had to pull a lot of hard hours during her residency. Maybe she doesn't want to patch up the tower's notorious grouch every time he takes a hit. But he doubts she'd ever be impolite enough to refuse him walking in.

"I have my space here: bathroom, laundry room, small kitchen. If I haven't bothered decorating that, what makes you think I'll want to do it for an entire house?"

"Aww, come on. Look at Ryder! She's having all kinds of fun making her place as obnoxious as possible. That could be you after a few online shopping sprees."

Bucky's eyes open slowly, his brows drawing in when the second verbal mention of Ava pulls parts of his attention back to the conversation. 

Fuck, not going to medical still leaves the option of her taking offense. Okay. Alright. So, he'll split the difference and go to emergency intake. He's pretty sure she's listed as his surgical contact in the tower now—he can't stomach looking at his own medical file, not even the written records. Any injury this big will get flagged for trauma support, and she'll be notified. Then it's up to her what she wants to do. That feels like a good compromise.

"She's doing that to reclaim it from Alec; that's different. I don't have the same motivation. For me, it's just going to be extra work.

"Who's Alec?" Bucky asks without thinking. If the universe doesn't hate him today, Natasha's just going to assume he's being his usual kind of paranoid.

"She hasn't mentioned him?" Tony sounds surprised. "Alec's her ex-husband."

Ex-husband? She was married? And she's not anymore, meaning she might be—

He shuts down that train of thought immediately. 

Reclaiming the space of her house implies they lived in it long enough to form some heavy memories. She hasn't mentioned having a kid, and she strikes him as the type to bring up something like that pretty fast. So it was just the two of them, most likely.

"People usually don't like talking about the egocentric sack of shit they used to coexist with," Natasha points out. Of course, she already knows about the doctor's history. It's her.

"Bad divorce?" he prods, trying not to sound overly invested in the answer. These assholes will take it as an invitation.

"Oh, the worst," Tony confirms. "Shithead tried fighting her on it tooth and nail. She had to borrow my legal team just to get the guy to fuck off and leave her alone. He even kept her surname after the divorce; can you believe that?"

An uneasy feeling starts to rise in his gut, making Bucky look over at him. Then up at Natasha. "What kind of won't leave her alone are we talking about?"

"Down, fido, my lawyers took care of it. There's no need to start tailing him. Aside from being a self-absorbed asshole that insists they'll," Tony's voice turns scornful as his fingers form air quotes, "work things out with time, he's toothless." 

"She's got concealed carry permits she earned properly if that makes you feel better," Natasha offers up. The thought does help ease the tension building in him. 

He won't read Ava's file, no matter how bad the buzzing gets. But he might check in with JARVIS about her home security. He's noticed her name on the system logs. She, or at least her house, is linked to SHIELD's network despite her general distrust of the organization. He understands the opposing priorities completely.

He caved and read Wyatt's file two nights ago. The buzzing had been building since Ava mentioned him wanting an autograph, and it finally got to be too much. Nothing's lurking there aside from an impressive list of historians from all the fuck over Georgia and Alabama. The kid's got more family than some towns have population. 

Bucky leans forward with a muted groan to change the autopilot's intended LZ of the Avenger's balcony to the entrance hanger for medical. If he's going to grit his teeth through the antiseptic over a couple small holes, he's damn sure not going to haul his ass through half the tower while his ribs leak. His patience has limits, and that's pretty fucking far over the starting line. 

Tony looks over at him with a deep, suspicious frown. Bucky frowns at him right back with the same level of scrutiny. He can feel Natasha staring a hole into the side of his head, even if he can't catch her in his peripherals. He hates both of them with a passion at the moment. He knows what's about to happen—

"Did you just… prioritize your own health," Tony questions like he's baffled by the very idea. His whole upper body turns in the seat as he looks up at Natasha excitedly. "Oh my god. He's doing it. All by himself." He raises a hand to his chest and looks back at Bucky. "They grow up so fast."

It's good that the autopilot is on. If it weren't, Bucky would be tempted to crash them out of spite, mostly because he's sure he'd survive it. "Very funny."

"All it took was a hippie that gives him candy," Natash adds, her voice dripping with smugness. "Who knew."

"Both of you can fuck off." Bucky doesn't like how close she just got to his primary motivation on the first try. Old habits die hard, et cetera. And he hates that he can't tell if she was trying to guess. If he's lucky, which he isn't, she was just making fun of him.

Natasha knows about his visits to the florist's website; he's fucking convinced of it now. He doesn't know how, and he can't outright call her on it. If he does, he could fuck up and make himself right. There is nothing worse than having the Black Widow as metaphorical family. Not even Steve's hovering.

She and Tony harass him for the remainder of the flight. It's not long, mercifully, and he's starting to regret not grabbing something for the doctor. They were in Montreal, of all places, so it would have been fitting. He figures she'll understand once he shows her his side. The train of thought makes him wonder what part of Canada she's originally from. She hasn't brought it up.

His foot is already bouncing by the time he reaches the elevator. He's still got the surgical towel shoved tightly against his ribs. He hopes she gets there fast if she ends up taking the call. The last thing he wants to do right now is sit around in the burn of antiseptic and bleach while he fights off the urge to bolt. 

This is good, Bucky reminds himself as he takes his first few steps into medical. He's sat through plenty of trips to emergency intake. He can handle walking into his first optional one. It's a non-issue. Completely.

When JARVIS informs him that his file and general vital scan have been submitted for intake, the buzzing gets so intense that he almost leaves. The pace of his sergeant walk, as Sam likes to designate it, slows to a crawl. Then he thinks about a doctor with concealed carry permits. One that lets her house be monitored by a government organization she's actively pushing herself to trust. All in an effort to contribute something good to the world. The buzzing eases, and he picks up his pace, headed for the solo observation room JARVIS listed for him.

There's no moment of standing involuntarily from nerves this time. He doesn't have to force himself to sit back down and wait, even though the room smells wrong. His skin is crawling, and he wants nothing more than to put a throwing knife in his hand like a goddamn security blanket. But he doesn't panic. He doesn't try leaving.

Baby steps.

When the door opens, it's devastating. There's no diminutive hippie with UFO-sized glasses smiling at him on the other side of it. It's a guy in a plain white lab coat without artistic stitching, one that Bucky's never met before in his life. He's already squinting down at a tablet, meaning this will be his doctor for the duration.

This was the worst plan he could have possibly conceived. The universe is humbling him for thinking he could get away with something like this without some kind of suffering. He just wanted to make up for being dismissive of her help initially. Now he gets to sit through this. How fucking grand.

"Barnes?" The doctor that's not Bucky's doctor looks up, his heart rate elevating by a few notches. He's putting in a lot of effort to look confident. It's not exactly working. "I'm Dr. Erickson. I'm guessing you're here for the bullet wounds JARVIS detected?"

"Yup." Bucky's not about to volunteer for small talk at the moment. It's a miracle he hasn't jumped off the biobed yet. "Where's Ryder?"

"Your primary is in a staff meeting at the moment." Erickson puts his tablet down on the supply cabinet's main counter. He's already starting to gather what he needs, leaving Bucky to figure out real quick if he's actually willing to do this. "Don't worry; I'll get you sewn up and on your way in no time."

He doesn't want it getting back to Ava that he bailed the moment she couldn't show up. He doesn't want to leave her with the impression that he's only going to take on medical care if it's her; that's not anywhere near fair. The woman is a brain surgeon, not his private physician. He can grow the fuck up and accept help from people that haven't gone through his gauntlet of verification.

"Great," he pushes out, lifting the side of his undershirt to offer an unobstructed view.

It's not great; it's fucking horrendous. The first touch of the new doctor makes the overly physical memory of the buzzing build so high, he can feel it in his teeth. They're not actually rattling in his jaw the way they did back then, he knows that, but it doesn't matter because his body is screaming at him that it's happening.

The first stitch going through his skin makes him want to put his fingers through the doctor's eye sockets. His mind goes over all the ways he can violently put at least ten feet between them without having to get up. Looking back, it's probably good he didn't reach for the throwing knives. He's not unhinged enough to stab someone unprovoked; he's better than that. But they'd have been distracting to his impulse control, that's for sure.

Dr. Handsy is pulling the first suture in tight when the door to the observation room opens again. Bucky doesn't look up, his eyes locked on a random point on the far wall while he focuses on his breathing. He only looks over when a billowing, maroon pant leg enters his peripheral.

Thanks to a bunch of dead Nazi scientists that used to hide out in the mountains of Russia, Bucky Barnes has a trigger in his brain that is entirely out of his control. One that, when activated by his own interest, lets him process his surroundings in a sliver of the time that it should for a human mind. It is exceptionally helpful in the field. 

Watching Ava Ryder walk in, wearing a suede jumpsuit that mercilessly frames her curves, proves to him that having it in the 30s would have gotten him shot by someone's father. Definitely before he left Brooklyn. Or before he got chased out by several fathers banding together with baseball bats. In the time it takes her hand to come off the door handle and make its way to her hip, his mind goes on one hell of a fucking journey.

He already had more than a vague idea of the shape of her before now; he can't help it. Comes with the territory of doing threat assessment for a living. God knows his eyes have slipped down to her chest on a shameful amount of occasions. Her tits are being held up and pushed together fucking beautifully at the moment. Typically, that would hold all of his attention.

But this is the first unobstructed view of her that he's gotten, thanks to the lab coat being nowhere in sight, and good fucking god. Holy fucking shit. Godfuckingdamn.

She's half turned from him at this angle, so he's only getting a side view. That's more than enough to show off an obscenely rounded ass and the cushy thighs it rests on that are going to haunt his fucking dreams. It's bigger than his hands by a margin that's outright glorious. The mental image of his fingers digging into it, of how it would make her skin dip under the pressure, makes his blood race.

He can't spot the outline of any underwear at first. Then her hand makes contact with the jumpsuit, and his eyes pick up on it. Right there, above the top of her finger, pulled up high over her hipbone. There's a thin band leaving an impression in the fabric. An extraordinarily thin band. There is nothing else in sight.

Pulled between Ava's legs, right at this very moment in time, is a strip of fabric that Bucky's tongue would fit against perfectly. Right under that is a taste he's been catching himself wondering about for two weeks now. One good, long drag of his nose. That's all it would take to push in whatever she's picked out for the day and soak it with that taste. He could get it back out from between her lips with his tongue, pull it to the side with his teeth to give himself room to feast—

Bucky tries to shift his weight as nonchalantly as possible while his brain slows back down. The comeback from tactical analysis is always jarring, with this one being especially so. 

He's the worst kind of bastard. An awful, selfish, perverted sonofabitch. There's not shit he can do to change that. How unfortunate.

"David," Ava greets, the name coming out as tense as the closed smile plastered on her face. "You can put that down."

The other doctor doesn't look up from the work his hands are doing. "That you, Ava? I heard you were—"

"Now."

Bucky's back straightens up as David looks at her nervously, taken aback. Bucky doesn't blame him; he didn't know her voice could get that forceful.

David sort of laughs, which feels like the worst possible choice to Bucky. But, hey, not his call. "What, do you want me to just—"

"I want your hands off my patient right now. I'm not asking." She watches with unwavering intensity as the other doctor lets the needle and thread drop from his hands. She visibly bristles at the patronizing expression on David's face, her head tilting aggressively. Bucky kind of wants to watch her hit him. "I'll be back in less than a minute, sergeant. I need a word outside with Dr. Erikson."

"Take your time," Bucky assures, the tension bleeding out of him already. His ribs are leaking, and there's a piece of doctor floss looped through his skin that he's going to have to cut out of himself tomorrow morning. The immoral evaluation of her outfit that his head threw at him is going to eat him alive. Forever. Especially when he's trying to fall asleep for the foreseeable future. 

All things considered, though, he feels fan-fucking-tastic.

David still looks somewhat shell-shocked, and there's real insult starting to creep into his posture, but the guy doesn't argue. He follows Ava back out of the room, not bothering with a goodbye in Bucky's direction. When the door closes behind them, his super hearing picks up on Ava reaming David about prioritizing patients before ego. She goes into detail about the deep shit he'll be in with her if he keeps ignoring her written orders, long before it ever gets him fired. She tacks on why her anger should scare him a hell of a lot more than the idea of that. Then she instructs him to keep his damn hands off her patients and get back to the intake desk. 

The protective streak makes Bucky's chest feel warm, a half-smile pulling at his lips. She's a handful, alright. One he'd give anything to be brave enough to send flowers to.

Ava is calm, cool, and collected when she leans back in through the doorframe, hanging off it with a soft smile. "Hiya, stranger. I hear you picked a fight in my motherland today."

"I hear it has an arms dealer problem. I wanted to see if I could help." He gestures down at the needle swinging from his ribs without looking at it. "Not all Canadians are as welcoming as you, turns out."

"Eh?" she fires back, hamming up the accent. "Wellll, I'm not about to let a few cranky arms dealers tarnish our reputation. What do you say you push that bandage against your new bragging rights, and we head for my office?"

Licking his bottom lip nervously, he tries to give her a confident smile. "You were busy with something."

"Not too busy for my favorite popsicle." One eyebrow raises sternly. "You are not allowed to tell Steve I'm playing favorites." God, she's cute when she tries to deflect. It's never worked. At least not on him.

"That's—" Shit, where to even find the fucking words for her. "You don't have to do this. Go out of your way like this. I don't mind getting patched up by random medics. Comes with the job."

Her smile turns impish. "That's cool and all, but I mind when people ignore basic ethics just to have a story about stitching up an Avenger. If you need to tell yourself I'm using you as fuel for a workplace pissing contest, go for it. Whatever gets you off that biobed." She leans back, leaving the door open wide behind her. "Come on; I can't stand the way they organize these damn shelves. I wouldn't patch you up in here even if you did pay me. Next time, head for my office first."

Bucky does as she ordered, pushing the surgical towel she packed for him against his side, not minding the sting in the least. He swallows down the point that, by every definition there is, he's not an Avenger. "I'll follow you, doc."

—

"Alright," Wyatt plops his hands down on the glass of the holo, his expression determined. His tight curls bounce with the motion, making their resident gumdrop look adorable, even through the discomfort. "Let's get to dissectin' this cacophony. All in one go, preferably, so I don't feel like yackin' up my lunch two days runnin'."

Ava's head tilts sympathetically. "Oh, honey, tell me you didn't—"

His hand comes up, with his index finger pointed to the ceiling. "Nope. But I got close a couple'a times thinkin' about this." He mutters several things under his breath about creepy Nazi bastards while he pulls up the raw data from Bucky's implants. "All the more reason to get it the hell over with."

"A whole day of digging through coded war crimes," Hannah deadpans quietly, raising a steaming mug to her lips. "I'm glad we get the fun assignments."

"You'd ditch us if we didn't," Ava jokes. She scrolls through the sergeant's file absentmindedly on her tablet, reviewing the vitals added just a few hours ago. He actually came to medical. For something as minor as a field injury. Of his own volition.

"Mmm. I don't know. It's pretty fun watching a brain move like Jell-O. You might have been able to convince me to stick around just for that."

SHIELD's primary system makes a blaring noise of disagreement as Wyatt loads the main file structure. He frowns, looking over at Ava with concern. "Its askin' for administrative override."

"Heeey, that's that thing Tony says I'm not supposed to abuse. That's probably not a good sign." Ava pushes her glasses further up the bridge of her nose and leans over to get a look at the error. "JAR, I'd like some reassurance we're not about to trigger an ancient LoJack if you wouldn't mind advising here."

"There are safeguards in place for importing code with an unknown source," JARVIS reports in. The warning on the screen is dismissed, presumably by him, and a new window comes up. A log of the programming in Bucky's cybernetics going through digital quarantine loads rapidly, with line after line being highlighted in red and labeled HYDRA Suspected. "I will process them for you. One moment."

"We have to clean the Nazi code before we can beat it to death," Hannah mumbles against the rim of her mug. "I think I kind of like that."

"Please, Hannie, I'm hangin' on by the skin'a my teeth here." Scrubbing his hands over his face, Wyatt groans exhaustedly. He drags them down slowly, giving Hannah a pleading look over the tops of his fingers. "You know I'm always here for supportin' you—"

"I'm aware." The ex-marine's clipped tone makes Ava snort and look back down at her tablet. They both know stopping him now isn't going to cut off the word vomit.

Wyatt's hands thunk back down onto the glass. "I'm so proud'a ya, y'know that—" And there's the thickening of the accent.

"I know."

Ava's eyes skim over the list of everything detected in Bucky's wound, locking on the word leather in particular. Today was her first look at his work gear—she's got a feeling he doesn't call it a uniform—in person. It was hard to keep professional in front of six and a half feet of Hi, how are ya? wrapped up in that much heavy black. The sounds that his vest made when he dropped it on the coffee table— Jesus. He's got to be packing enough in there to arm a small country. 

"All's I'm sayin' is that if I have to hear about murder right now, I might actually upchu—"

"Please don't."

Ava's too scared to ask what's in the sergeant's pants for a multitude of reasons. Professionalism is lower on the list than it probably should be. It's a shame, too. He's downright hilarious when he lets himself talk. There's not a doubt in her mind that he'd come up with something unbearably good—and unwaveringly dry—in response to the loaded question.

"A'right then. We're in agreement. No bad thoughts today. We go in like—like excavators, right? With our helmets and our 'lil pickaxes, and we get what we need so we can—" The way he cuts himself off makes Ava look back up in concern. She finds the most horrified expression on Wyatt's face. "That—ah shit, that didn't come out all that right. That was mean, wannit? Insensitive. I'm not tryin' to belittle what the sergeant's been through."

"You weren't belittling anything," Ava assures, reaching out to rub his arm. "I think he'd be the first one to race you to a fossil joke about this."

"You'll tell 'im I'm takin' this serious, won't ya—"

A small chuckle escapes before she can stop it. "Wyatt, sweetheart, it's not like he heard you—"

"You take your pills today, Combs?" Hannah's calm question makes the gumdrop freeze in place. She blows on her coffee, taking a small sip. "If you say you don't remember, I'm going to—"

Wyatt snaps his fingers, his expression shifting to relief. "I didn't, and I remember why, too." He rolls his chair back with a sudden push, aiming for his desk. He reaches out before the chair finishes the trip to grab his patch-covered messenger bag. "One'a the cats got int'a my coat closet; dumbass got stuck on a shelf for reasons I'm still not real clear on." He pops open his medication bottle, tossing a pill into his mouth with a level of dexterity that makes her jealous. "The hollerin' was s'damn loud, I thought the landlord was gonna come knockin'."

"Which one was it?" Ava asks. "Not the new kitten?"

"No, no—Juno's been'a dream. It was Galileo again. I love that furry little bastard, but sometimes he can drive me nutty ." He pauses to take a swig from another glossy vacation mug. Today's is advertising a campground Ava's never heard of that's the best in the Rockies, according to the swirling font. "I got new pictures of Juno if you want 'em, though."

"Yes, please," Ava confirms happily. Holding the teacup-sized ball of fur made her whole month when he last brought Juno in. Hannah ended up hogging most of the cuddle time, but the sound of little meows filling the day had been enough to make up for it.

Wyatt pulls his phone from his back pocket and brings it around to hook up to the holo. The system dings with the sound of a successful transfer after a moment. He loads a collection of new photos, zeroing in on one of Juno clawing her way up a window curtain—

The power to the lab shuts off with a loud, electric click. Everything plunges into darkness with the privacy setting on the glass walls keeping the sun out. It comes back on before Ava can react, the building's primary system switching to the emergency power grid. She and Wyatt lock eyes in panic.

"Oooh man, boss, did I just—"

"I'm sure you didn't," Ava comforts, trying to push down her own panic. It helps that she's heard Tony rambling about the work he's put into making this place indestructible. "JAR?" 

There's no response from the AI. She trades another nervous glace with Wyatt.

"I know it was probably the Nazi shit, but I'm hoping it was the cats," Hannah says, sounding sincere. "I feel like that'll make a much better story."

"Oh my god, did I break JAR?" Wyatt looks between them frantically. "How often does he back up his servers? Did I kill'a piece'a JAR?!"

"I have not been murdered," the AI confirms after nearly a minute of being gone. "The safeguards reported a false positive regarding the programming of Sergeant Barnes' cybernetics. It has been handled."

Ava gives the hologram wall of code a warry look. "Handled by you?" There's a suspicion building in her gut around his phrasing, one that she's not planning on letting out of her teeth. 

"Mr. Stark has a protocol in place that cuts off my servers in the event of any irregular activity. Given the nature of the programming's origin, the system is designed to er on the side of caution."

"That's a really fancy way of dancing around the point, JAR." She's trying to stay civil about this. It's not an easy venture, and she's pretty sure it's not translating at all. Even she can hear the frustration in her voice. "How about we cut the shit, and you tell me what the false positive was."

"There are automated routines running for Sergeant Barnes' implants. They are not harmful; I've taken the liberty of checking them personally now that they've been cleared through quarantine. I am creating a stable update to forward to—"

"How long have they not been harmful, JARVIS?"

Hannah sits up from her relaxed position at the avoidance of their favorite nickname for the AI. Wyatt's brows pull in nervously, his eyes never leaving Ava. They both know exactly what she's digging at.

There's a long hesitation from JARVIS. Short by normal social standards but an eternity for a sentience with quantum processors. "There is not currently a risk posed within the Sergeant's—"

Ava's out of her chair and halfway to the door before he even finishes the omission. Fueled by some of the most intense rage she's ever felt in her life, she marches out on swift feet. She's going to kill him. She's going to string him up—maybe hang him off the side of the tower.

America's fucking Sweetheart, her ass. America's Doomed Liar is a lot more like it.

"Where is he," Ava nearly growls, still stalking down the halls, leaving the medical wing in a hurry. "JARVIS, I know you're still listening; you tell me where that puffed-up, hypocritical—oooh , you tell me where Rogers is right the fuck now. And then you tell me where Stark is—"

"Dr. Ryder, I know you're not inclined to believe this at the moment, but I assure you—"

"You're right; I'm not inclined to do that at all." She takes a deep breath as she passes through the front entrance, slowing herself to a stop. With genuine effort, she pushes down her anger. "I don't want to keep yelling at you. I don't like doing it in the first place. If you don't want to tell me where they are, I'll find them myself."

Ava heads for the elevator to do just that. She's not expecting a response as she pounds the side of her fist against the button for the Datacrux's floor. It's likely to be her best bet to find any of them. There's not a chance in hell that she's letting her team dedicate any more time to this until she gets some fucking explanations.

Halfway along the ride up, the light around the button goes dim. A flash of anger rises in her until she sees the one for the executive level illuminate. 

"Mr. Stark is not currently in the tower, but you will find Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes debriefing in the Situation Room," JARVIS informs her over the elevator's intercom, making the SHEILD agents around her pretend not to look over. She's tempted to ask them if it's the outfit.

"Thank you, JAR," she offers as an olive branch. Regardless of what's truly going on here, she doubts the AI is all that comfortable with the subject.

"You're welcome, Ava."

She's only been to this part of the tower once before. Tony dragged her up to the Avenger's balcony for a party after her divorce was first finalized. That's about the extent of her experience with this section. It's not hard to find her way with everything denoted like it is in the rest of the building.

The palm of her hand smacks against the door marked Situation Room, and she shoves it open aggressively. Both super soldiers, the Falcon, Black Widow, and a scattered group of SHIELD agents stare back at her in surprise. It doesn't slow her down any.

Ava points an irate finger at Steve in the uneasy silence of the room. "Unless New York just caught fire, you and I are about to have a very blunt conversation, captain."

"Hiya, doc." Bucky, unsurprisingly, is the only one in the room smiling at her while she glares daggers at Captain America. He's still in his not-uniform. There's still blood on it. The charm he's throwing her way reminds her that they won't want an audience. 

"I'm going to ask the rest of you to leave," she continues, but her eyes stay on the sergeant as her finger lowers. "I don't think you'll want to be here for this, Bucky."

"What makes you think I don't wanna watch you beat up my best friend?" He leans back in his chair, his hands coming up to rest on his stomach as his smile deepens.

"Can I stay?" Sam asks, his voice eager. It's a damn shame this is how she gets to meet him. She doubts the Falcon has any clue about unethical research.

"Come on," Natasha insists with a serene nod in Ava's direction, grabbing Sam's shirt to drag him up from his chair. "You heard her."

"I—hey!" Steve looks so insulted as he watches his friends and various coworkers abandon him with zero hesitation. "You're just gonna—I don't even know what I did!"

"Neither do I, but I am very ready to hear about it," Bucky assures Ava, not an increasingly distressed Steve.

Ava taps her foot impatiently as the room clears out, leaving her alone with the super soldiers. She ignores the nerves radiating off of one of them and focuses on the one that looks delighted. "I'm serious. This is about your case. Specifically, the work HYDRA was trying to finish."

The mirth leaves Bucky almost entirely. His posture doesn't adjust from its reclined position. "Alright. Tell me what's got you livid about it."

"Steve here made me a promise that was broken in my lab a few minutes ago."

Steve's eyebrows pull in with confusion. "Which promise? Wait—a few minutes ago—Is this about that blackout? Ava, catch me up here; what the hell is—"

"You swore to me that the intention of HYDRA—at least where Bucky's case is concerned—was to make an army of super soldiers, nothing more." She's letting him process this one step at a time. It'll make yelling at him for lying a lot easier. That, and she's honestly worried the technophobe doesn't understand the gravity of the situation.

"I—" Steve hesitates, and she watches the switch to tactical assessment come over him. It's startling to see it directed at her from a face that isn't Bucky's. "As far as I know, that was the intention."

"Yeah? You're sure about that? You're sure you're not omitting something pretty fucking important to my job, Steven?"

"JARVIS, what was the blackout?" Bucky questions at half the volume he started at when she first came in.

Ava points at the sergeant insistently. "See? I'm guessing he doesn't even know, but he's sure as hell already on the right track."

"There was an incident regarding the coding found in your implants, Sergeant Barnes. It has been handled. I have prepared an update to their systems whenever you're ready to undergo a transfer."

"As your doctor, I'm ordering it. We can go back to my office after I'm finished ripping your friend a new asshole for lying to my face." Her eyebrows lower at Bucky in indignation. She's doing this for him, but that doesn't mean she's going to let him off the hook if he knew. "We should probably figure out if I need to do the same to you before we get there."

"Hey, hang on now." Steve raises one hand, likely to try to calm her, but changes his mind and puts it back under the table. She's guessing someone's finally clued in the out-of-time man about that practice making women want to throw something. At his head. "We might not always be able to talk about classified information—something you agreed to, I might add—but I've never lied about HYDRA's intent as far as I comprehend it. I've been very careful to hold up that end of our deal."

"Let me tell you how I know, for a fact, that someone involved in this case is doing a piss-poor job of lying to me about it. Since you haven't quite figured out modern tech, I'm going to try to keep it simple." Ava points a far less aggressive, more instructing finger at Bucky's arm. "In order for that hunk of metal to work, it needs to be programmed. The hardware needs software that can tell it how to read brain signals. A few decades ago, some Nazis sat in a room and wrote a bunch of code for that software. That's what was supposed to be in Bucky's implants. That's all that was supposed to be in Bucky's implants."

"Wait—what the hell else is in them?" The flicker of fear that creeps into Bucky's expression breaks her heart. There's not a doubt in her mind that he could sell her on any lie he wants to with his mind set on it. That's the point of infiltrators like him. 

But Ava's willing to bet everything she's got in this world that the fear in him at the moment is genuine. He doesn't know. And it makes her feel awful.

"Given the size of your implants, I'm guessing not much," she tries to reassure. "We can always purge whatever is there later. However, if the code were as simple as 'read this signal, do this thing,' it wouldn't have been flagged as untouchable by Tony's security measures. The ones put in specifically to prevent JARVIS from being corrupted." She crosses her arms over her chest in exasperation, her eyes moving to one of the small security cameras on the ceiling. "Would you like to explain to the captain what kind of code it would take to accomplish that, JARVIS?"

There's another human-length moment of hesitation from the AI in response. "It would take adapting code."

"The part he's holding back—definitely because he's under orders not to break SHIELD protocol—is that something has to be driving the adaptation. There is such a thing as self-adapting code; that would absolutely explain it. If we weren't talking about something made in the 40s when HYDRA needed entire warehouses just to house a few terabytes of data." She glances over at Bucky. "While I'm sure the agents you scare the piss out of would disagree, your head isn't actually big enough to hold that much."

"You flirtin' with me to stop the panic or to apologize for not being Canadian for a minute?"

Ava blinks in surprise, the slightest hint of heat coming up the sides of her neck. That—she hadn't been—well. Steve's head turns to him, his eyebrows raising in mild shock.

Bucky clears his throat, then tries for a quiet chuckle, his eyes floating between her and the table. "Sorry—it's this damn room. Puts me in sergeant mode, makes me—let's get back to yelling at Steve."

"Thanks, asshole, I appreciate—"

"What makes you think I won't yell at you just because I'm Canadian?" Ava counters, finally recovering. "You trying to stereotype me, Barnes?"

The relief that comes off of Bucky is palpable. "I'd go for the hippie thing first if I was trying to do that."

"Didn't you sleep through the McCarthy era?"

"HYDRA gave me the long and short of it between naps."

Her hand flies up to her face to block a loud snort. Damn him, this is serious. But she's not about to begrudge him the gallows humor. She lowers it again while he smirks at her. "Do you mind? I'm trying to make an angry but valid point here."

"About a bunch of code that my head isn't big enough for," he continues for her dryly, one hand coming off his stomach to gesture up at it.

Ava sighs, the amusement from getting sidetracked by the Brooklyn heartstopper fading fast. "Not big enough by the standards of the 40s. By today's standards?" Her head tilts to the side sadly, readying herself to watch that fear in him get more substantial. "You tell me, Buck. Did the Nazis work in the mindset of single projects, or did they work in the mindset of generations that would lead a global empire?"

The words are the last piece to complete the puzzle in Bucky's mind; Ava can see it happen in his eyes. The expression of horror it yanks out of him will haunt her for the rest of her days. "Zola." 

It's said in a whisper, and Ava's not even sure what the word is. 

It takes Steve longer to reach whatever conclusion Buckys come to, and he looks resistant to the idea at first. "No, that's... no—Buck, you've been to what's left. You know what it took—"

"That's the point she's making, stupid. Look at how small everything's gotten." He stops, and Ava doesn't miss the sight of a hard swallow. "It makes sense. Think about it. It makes sense. They took care of the car until they could find an engine that fit. I was the prototype. Or—was going to be, at least."

The comparison—the one he's using on himself—is revolting. Accurate, but astoundingly revolting. She pushes past it, leaning down to tap a condescending nail on the table. "Hi, there. Still here. Still looking for some answers. What the hell is Zola?"

With Steve watching him like a hawk, Bucky breathes a long, tired sigh. "Not what. Who." 

"I can fill her in," Steve offers to him quickly. "You don't have to do this."

"Oh, I'm not doing shit. She's going to do it all." Bucky locks eyes with Ava, his expression passive. Having the Winter Soldier himself that focused in on her makes her breath catch involuntarily. "How's your Russian, doc?"

"I don't speak a word of it. Do I need to for this?"

"No, I'm sure you've got plenty of ways to translate anything you feel like reading. You should look up doveryai, no proveryai while you're at it." He leans forward, resting his arms on the table. His eyes never once move away from hers. "JARVIS, transfer a copy of my archive access to Dr. Ryder. Full permissions. And the next time she asks you a hard question, you don't have to bullshit her. Tell her to call me."

—

April 6th, 2015

"I want you to bring me with you next time."

"No."

"Is that a no because you do not agree or because you are afraid of mother?"

"Both."

Shuri frowns at the security feed, ignoring the quiet laughter she can hear coming from Nakia on the other end. "Coward."

The camera mounted on T'Challa's dashboard shakes as he turns it back to his face, his expression annoyed. "Say that to my—"

"Coward."

T'Challa rolls his eyes and turns the camera back around as Nakia laughs harder. He will be mopey now, for sure. "I am not taking you to stare at a soldier's office with us."

"Why not?"

"To start with, I refuse to be trapped in a car with you for that amount of time."

"You should be so lucky! Now, what is the real reason."

"What part of royal family do you not—"

"You get to go to these things."

"And when you leave your lab long enough to learn to use the spears of your foremothers, that privilege can extend to you."

"Okoye is always ready to teach you, Shuri," Nakia offers up diplomatically. 

"I do not need a spear to sit in a car annoying my brother," Shuri argues. They always do this to her. She is tired of it.

"You do not need to sit in a car annoying your bother at all." The moping has already started. She can hear it in T'Challa's voice.

"Fine. I will go to Ava's house and stay there while—"

"No."

Shuri slams her hands down on her desk, making the various instruments on it rattle precariously. "She is my family, too!"

There's silence on the other end in the wake of her anger. Then the camera turns again, this time by Nakia's hand. She doesn't stop the spin until it's pointed to show her and T'Challa. He does not look as annoyed anymore. He looks guilty.

Nakia gives her a sympathetic smile. "No one is trying to take that from you. We are only trying to keep you safe. We do not know how far Alec is willing to take things."

"And I am not willing to present the man with more temptations of power," T'Challa adds, the guilt on his face shifting to resignation. "It is not simply because I am afraid of our mother. I agree with her. And with our father. Alec Harlow is a man that is losing everything. That is a powerful motivator, Shuri."

"I am not afraid of that spineless demon," Shuri insists angrily. "I could handle him myself, thank you very much."

"Half the school children in Wakanda could," Nakia mocks under her breath.

She gets a stern look from T'Challa before he focuses it on Shuri. "It is not his strength we are concerned with. It is the allies he can call upon at any time. Men with strength and resources that we do not wish to deal with."

Some of the fight leaves her. Not much, but it does ebb. Her brother might be an idiot, but he is right about this. Ava would not be this afraid for no reason. She has been trying to disguise it when Nakia brings her for visits, which is how Shuri knows it is serious.

"I hate that man, brother." The word is far too inadequate. The contempt she holds for the worm who put fear in the heart of her favorite mad scientist feels immeasurable.

"As do I. As do we all." T'Challa smiles at her finally, his face softening. "I promise to bring you to hit him if he is ever arrested. That is when I will deem it safe enough."

"How many times?" she chases after quickly. "Can I bring a weapon?"

"You can bring exactly one weapon. Can you guess what it is?" The smile turns sarcastic as he reaches out and turns the camera back around to face Alec's office window. 

"I do not need a spear to break that man."

"No, you need it so I can stop being lectured by Okoye for enabling your avoidance of tradition."

"That will not help. She wishes for me to sit through her lessons. I would just bring the spear to hit him over the head with."

Nakia laughs, the sound light and soothing. "I am surprised you did not go straight for the idea of skewering him."

Tilting her head down at her desk, Shuri hesitates. She picks up the ridiculous coffee mug Ava got her, spinning it around in her hands with somber movements. 

Ava's last visit had been especially hard to stomach. The woman had looked so... empty as she talked about the start of the divorce. There had been no vengeful joy in her as she told Shuri's father she understood the gravity of the situation. No hard-won victory in her posture. There had only been grief and shame.

Shuri sighs, turning away from the screen to head for her lab's kitchen. She is going to fill the mug with one of the teas that Ava brings her. It will be a nice change from the energy drinks she has been binging. "No. I... I do not wish the man dead. I only wish to see him locked away somewhere he can never smile again."

—author end notes—

there’s one sentence in this chapter that is 14 words long (including contractions) that is the entire foundation of their incoming dom/sub and oh my g o d when i tell you that shit was cathartic to write 😫🤌 some day when this is finished, im gonna write a whole goddamn dissertation on that one sentence and all the narrative shit that tied into it in this fic so help me (YOURE ALLOWED TO GUESS BTW)

anyways, everyone is alive in wakanda bc i said so. and nakia and t’challa are really stupid uber mega important to ava’s backstory

i feel like we’ve all, as a species, Been Through Enough. you can talk my ear off abt anything, but dont talk to me abt the opening of wakanda forever i will Literally Die, i havent cried that hard over the first watch of a movie in so fucking long and i dont think im strong enough for a second. all i ever need for binging is winter soldier and black panther anyhow (FATWS is still growing on me and i only like it so far bc im a sambucky shipper. and a stucky shipper. and a 3 musketeer shipper. and a—i like making buckaroo be in love a lot. lets just. leave it at that). we can stop with the big owies thanks. let me escape to the fictional world where everyone is alive and Nothing Hurts, t h a n k s.

well. okay. some things are gonna hurt in this. probably really super bad too and youre gonna be really really mad at me when it hits. but like. theyre set up for comfort pay off so does it even really count??? i didnt think so, ty for agreeing 😌

ily 💖 tyty for reading 💞 and tyty in advance for yelling at me when i eventually hurt u ❤️🥰 i will understand, its okay, u are entitled to the emotional compensation on that one

[mosviqu]

lmao yeahhh at least the self awareness is there it's something iguess😭

i just hope i will grow to like them one day cuz i dont want to let go of the 03liners💔 their choreography and fits were great but i just hope they will get better songs next time or sumn (sorry if there are any boynextdoor fans who are reading this) DUDE SAME I WAS SO HAPPY ABOUT HIM!!!! (jiung is amazingggg) AHHH IM SO EXCITED AS WELL this is probably going to be my fav ep from them judging by the previews or whatever they are called🤭 IM GLAD SUNOO IS APART OF OUR CREW😌JUST A GREAT ADDITION REALLY!! (ooo at least the number of 03liners that i know about is growing xd)

THEY SHOULD JUST HIRE U THEN ACTUALLY LMAO U WOULD BE THE BEST PROTECTOR!!! and now i know that i definitely do not want u to get mad at me🥸

so true but i think writing might be like that as well because before i sent u that ask i literally just didn't really write in english at all😟 IM GLAD U UNDERSTAND ME🥳 ohh god i'm sorry but that's kind of a funny story ur poor roommate😭 I HOPE U GUYS STILL HAVE THEM JUST TO WATCH THEM BACK AND LAUGH (or cringe)

the tiktok algorithm just knows how to get people hooked onto something:o AND YESSS HE IS SO ADORABLE!! i only know them as well in addition with yujin(youngest) and gyuvin(my beloved) but the poor three left just feels like i will never get them😭😭 2hours is just too long of a time istg

IM GLAD U LIKED SOME BUT I THINK I DID VERY BAD WITH THE RECOMMENDATIONS LMAO

(ajhdhdjfj dude when i read ur authors note i also almost cried i started reading it on my bus ride home so i think people thought i was crazy or sumn lmao) and also i can't remember wether i have replied to ur last reply on ur main or did i only reply to it in my head so if u would let me know i would appreciate it.-. (liebestraum anon💕💕)

no bc its so unfortunate i truly hope the next comeback is better 😭😭😭 im sorry boynextdoor fans it just wasnt for me sadly 😔 if the music is good we are more than happy to recruit new 03 line besties to the squad tho!!

THE CB LOOKS SO GOOD i keep hearing the song on tiktok and each time i think its out already and i go check it out and its not. this could be very well prevented if i just checked the cb date but im honestly too lazy so ill just wait for it to appear in my spotify notifs or something 😭😭

I AM THE BEST PROTECTOR its the aries rage and loyality ❤ also being the only daughter of the family helps SSHSJ. also dont worry i usually dont get violently mad at my friends i usually just turn petty on them so. no fights here dw dw AHAHA

no bc if i didnt have tumblr i just wouldnt use english much either LMAO also i feel like that every time i write a fic after a long time i feel like i turn rusty and i just cant get anything out of me 😭😭 takes me a few mins to adapt truly. also i would say poor my roommate but honestly she didnt know what major to pick so she copied me so thats on her 🤷‍♀️ (jk im glad we stuck together ive known her for 4 years now and if it wasnt for her i would be handling uni much worse than i am). ALSO WE DO HAVE MOST OF THEM but some got deleted 😔💔

LITERALLY the tiktok algorithm is my bestie but also my biggest enemy (have i mentioned that i got into wilbur through tiktok. :,)) but yes hanbin is the new love of my life thankyou. i am so excited for their debut TT lets hope i learn their names quickly AHAHA

YOU DIDNT DO BADLY W THE RECOMMENDATIONS I JUST NEED TO BE IN A SPECIFIC MOOD FOR NEW SONGS I GUESS 😭😭 i'll update u on all my next progress w the tbz listening party <3

:(((( crying is strictly prohibited with matters thay include me. /j ((also if u mean on rrxnjun,, i replied to your ask after u sent this one ?? Im not really sure ??? but as of now i have no more asks from u!)

[rrxnjun]

HECK YEAHHH!! 03 best line😌🥳i was so happy to find out he was born in 2003 cuz i swear it's so rare to find anyone born in 2003 in any band (or tbh even just content creators)!! we are superior for being older than him /j😌😌 WAIT LMAO THATS KIND OF COOL THAT ITS ON THE SAME DAY:o doyoung is my guy after jihoon he is just so great so i understand him hitting differently lmao

yeahhh iguess i love doing things that take a lot of patience although i'm a very impatient person😶 and i'm still on the start of my embroidery career but it's so fun!!! we are the coolest grandmas out there😎😎😎 dude i love plants but i always end up killing them so🤡 (ofc sending one immediately!!)

i'm so happy about it as well;-; I WILL BUT MY PICS ARE PROBABLY GOING TO BE LIKE PIXELS CUZ WE ARE KIND OF FAR BACK SO I WILL SEND U MAKE SURE TO SEND U PIXEL CALUM!!! will tell u all about it🫡

SORRY!! IT WASNT FOR COMFORT🥲 tbh as u should treasure is fun so ur phase is completely understandable!!! jihoon is the definition of perfect tbh just love the guy!! ooo i've never seen that i will go and watch that later👀 but losing ur shit is probs very much understandable🤣

WAIT ACTUALLY OH MY🤭💞but actually only write it if u want to!!! i don't want to force u!!! IT WILL BE!! MANIFESTING FOR IT TO BE AMAZING!!!!🥳🥳🥳(awww thank u so much🥹lmao that would be kind of funny ngl but maybe hopefully i will be comfortable enough to not be anon by then cuz i'm starting become more comfortable to post on the internet so i might save u from having to do that🤣)

i'm very glad it cheered u up!! i always love reading ur replies to me and they just cheer me up always tbh hihi🥹💗💕 (liebestraum anon💕)

TRULY !!! 03 line is so rare to see i think and thats why i automatically adopt every 03 liner i see 😭😭 also our bias taste is....the same. i am NOT surprised 😭😭

how can u be an impatient person then 😭😭 i get impatient w art and then i rush the details and it ends up looking like shit 😔 the only thing i dont feel like i rush is writing but even that sometimes gets hard to do LMAO 😭 i got so many plants for my bday also!!! im surprised they're not dead bc sometimes i forget to water them and im lowkey freestyling the care but i love all of them to death💓 wishing u good luck w your embroidery career and waiting for that bracelet !!

CANT WAIT FOR PIXEL CALUM!!!!!!! better than nothing 😔🤞

losing my shit is understanable but also it makes me feel silly like girlie that man doesnt know you and here u are in a parasocial relationship with him💔 watching ygtb made me so proud of him tho he grew so much as a person and a performer and so did all of them!!!

i woULD but see it occured to me that i have exams next week so i kinda lost my shit and now im spiraling instead of writing but. it wILL happen after !!!

omg i am glad to hear you are more comfy!!! i would never pressure u into anything bc i want u to be 100% comfortable but if u ever decide to come off anon i am welcoming you w open arms my friend 💓

to finish off this reply i want to apologize for being so late with it but i had a rough week full of stress and hangover 🤠 also i hope you are doing well and that you are taking care of yourself!!

[hyunverse]

hello my sweet loveeee i hope ur day has been good :)) i just woke up and i’m about to go grocery shopping and i’m hoping they have my favorite pastry 🙏🏼 what’d you get up to today ? :)) anime names for cats are always so fitting yk ?? like it just works with cats so i completely respect that. i will be sure to give them kisses for u when i get home hehe. and yea dude the rats here are NASTY. people’s dogs can also do some reallyyyyyy questionable things 😭😭

YEP THE BACK LINE UR SO RIGHT i love that dorito shape on men 👌🏼. i feel like out of all the kpop idols in 4th gen, sunghoon, chan, hyunjin, and mingi have like the broadest shoulders i’ve seen so far like i literally think you could lay across them and just be fine (which like yes sign me up pls). YES VICTORRR so dead and sweet and gorg he is prime dead example 🙏🏼 i also wish i had long fingers. i’m always shocked at seeing the size diff of jeongins hand to his phone 😩 talk about sexy. god i just love hands i could talk about them for days it’s like embarrassing atp

sushi all day every day !! i will pick sushi over anything always 🤭 nachos are def up there too tho i love a nice loaded nacho. also thank you for your input thats so good to know. i will definitely be trying it out then :))) i love thai food so much as well so that’s good to know too ^_^ thank u love. SAME my heart beats so fast and i get the shakes 😭. it also oddly makes me break out rly bad ?? but it’s like painful acne too ?? idek. asian dolce latte sounds soooo good rn. i bet our starbucks menus are so different (tbh anything but americas seems better for all food chains). the christmas specials are always so good too, i love when they actually come up w new stuff here

SOOOOO SMOOCHABLE even for todays concert he just looked so so good. i was so mesmerized by felix and jeongin from the clips i’ve seen. something about the tight black jeans just does it for me every timeeeee 😩 MINHOS THIGHS don’t get me started again 🤭🤭. they all looked so good and i love the new dark blue outfits, it’s so sexy 😩

- 🐈‍⬛

sweet love is so cute i’m melting. hello angel baby <3 my day has been super good ^__^ i just watched an anime film called suzume, almost teared up im ngl ☹️ i have a tendeancy to cry during films 😔 it’s the sensitive heart in me 🤝 aaaa i lovelovelove grocery shopping sm <3 the cereal section makes me happy eventhough i don’t typically buy them </3 i hope they have your fav pastry, babe! whats ur fave? i love bagels, or any pastry that has meat in it, really. what do the dogs do there, help 😭 i think malaysian dogs are pretty normal 😟

DORITO SHAPE I CACKLEEEED. U DIDNT JUST CALL THEM DORITO SHAPED 😭 chan’s back mmmm. esp that one performance, i think wolfgang where he took off his shirt ISBDKWJS MAKES ME FERAL ‼️ also maybe its just me but sharp collarbones... delish.

victor is the man them e-boys wish they were but arent. they could never be victor. he is far too beautiful. unreachable visual 💯 talking abt animated characters... how are we feeling about howl pendragon? so sexy 😋 JEONGIN’S HANDS ARE SO BIG LIKEEEE?? /:+"!+ THE SIGHT OF THEM MAKES ME MALFUNCTION?? SIR PUT THAT HAND IN MINE RN ‼️ HIS PHONE BE LOOKING LIKE AN ERASER IN HIS HAND BCS HOW BIG HIS HAND IS. HRJFHEHF R GRTRR

coffee is so good it’s unfair that its bad for us 😭 why r bad things always so good. smh. i think our starbies menus are deffo different, actually, a lot of our fast food menus are different me thinks. esp with the fact that malaysia is a dominantly muslim country, so a lot of chain restaurants have to be halal (muslim friendly) — therefore they don’t serve food that contain pork or alcohol. i think that's the main reason why malaysian menus are super different compared to america’s!! i know there are certain recipes available there which aren’t here </3 also!! ik most americans typically customize their starbucks — compared to that, malaysians usually opt for whatever that’s on the menu. i rarely customize my order tbh ^__^ and whats up with American mcdonalds constantly having a broken ice cream machine? istg i go for a mcdonald's ice cream run every week and its never broken 😭 oh and u mentioning thai food is making me crave for pandan leaves chicken </3

concert vids are always so good. THE HYUNE DANCING VIDS CONTAMINATING MY TIKTOK FYP RN IS CRAZY. CRAZY I TELL U!! someone said that hyunjin flirts through his dancing and oh god. . . it’s so true. now i can’t get the thought outta my head. FELIX BEEN ACTING UP A LIL TOO MUCH LATELY BABE... WHATS UP WITH THE CONSTANT SHIRT LIFTING 🤨 HES IN HIS S WORD ERA ISTG ‼️dark looks fit them sm 😋 they look so 😋 nomnom able 😋 minho’s thighs in them leather jeans doe. . . think abt it...

it’s like 4am rn i shud sleep. have a good day my baby, kisskisskiss <3