#i hope y'all realize that when I say tacky it's with nothing but love in my heart

[bookshelfdreams]

yk when you see someone share a finished handmade item that they clearly spent a lot of time and money on and it's just. The absolute tackiest thing you have seen in your life. And then you ask yourself why someone would waste all those resources on such an eyesore.

(no, of course you can't relate to that because you're a much nicer person than me)

In any case.

BEHOLD!

A wool coat!

The top fabric is handwoven and handspun, the whole thing is sewn by hand, too.

Leftovers. Barely anything, all things considered, which is very satisfying.

This thing took me well over 3 years to make, on and off. And now I'm done.

Thank you for your attention.

[ashes-in-a-jar]

The Princess Hold: a Jon, Martin and Also Martin Tale

@dathen​ asked and I'm attempting to deliver XD

Really wanted to do this anyway as a sort of writing exercise. I hope y'all like it!

.

.

The Wind whipped around him angrily as though the air was cross at being forced to move around. The hallways, doors, shifting carpets, tacky plants and all that was that maze of a hotel were folding into themselves, creating a void for the air to rush in. Jon barely managed to find his bearings eventually completely losing his footing as the floor beneath him gave way into nothing. Vaguely he thought he was lucky he was on the bottom floor and immediately realized it didn't matter because now he was midair and falling fast.

He hardly had time to think beyond the bitter notion that while time and space didn't function, gravity seemed to work just fine when impact occurred.

Only it was not what he was expecting.

That is, it wasn't jarring or painful as it should have been. It was soft and gentle and made a muffled 'oomph' noise.

Jon tried to catch his breath as he looked up. His mind immediately calmed at the sight. Martin. His lovely Martin, slightly rattled was looking down at him as his arms were somehow wrapped around him in an almost princess hold.

But not quite.

Because the way he landed, there was no way a mere princess hold could catch him so securely and steadily. And that's when Jon looked up to his other side.

There was Martin. Again. As disheveled and surprised as the first.

"Christ, Jon??"

Jon whipped his head around to the first Martin. Then back to the other one. Then back again.

"Um..."

His mind took a moment to finally let the information seep in as he Knew what he was seeing. Oh. Interesting. It did not make it any less bizarre for him though. While fully comprehending what was going on he suddenly realized his current situation and his face began heating up.

"O-oh Martin. G-good. Um, it’s good to see you... both." He really didn't know which way to look and being held the way he was was not helping.

Martin (and... Also Martin?) must have read the daze and astonishment on his face because despite their evident bewilderment they both chuckled and gently set him down between them in perfect synchronization. They did not step back.

"W-what happened? We just got here, there was a hotel and suddenly..." Martin said, still confused.

"Jon what did you do this time?" The other Martin chided fondly.

"I, um, I killed Helen." They were not backing away and it was very distracting.

"Oh." Said one.

"Why?" Said the other.

Jon couldn't keep up. He just had a whole building implode like a black hole around him and he was still trying to adjust to the sudden change from being immersed in distorted, dizzying patterns to being back in the gray, eye-full, monotone landscape that now surrounded him and his beloved(s). He could hear the rain not too far away.

It was disorientating how nice and warm he suddenly felt. From both his sides. Both Martins had put their arms around his waist and back to steady him and kept their hands there. Two arms more than Jon was used to. It was strange. It was nice. It was... What were they talking about?

"Uhh.. I-It's a long story. Ish. I-I'll explain later." There is no way he could concentrate enough to explain all of the convoluted manipulation games he and Helen played. Not now when there are two very distracting persons standing so near him.

One Martin sighed "And of course you couldn't wait until you were safe outside to make her disappear."

"No. I'm sorry."

"It's okay Jon, we're just glad you're okay." The second Martin was stroking his back in reassuring circular motions.

"Uhh... H-how was your domain?" This is getting ridiculous. He needed a way to differentiate between the two Martin's in his mind otherwise he will just become more confused. He settled on a simple Right-Martin and Left-Martin where they were positioned around him accordingly.

"Uh, as you can probably tell, it was a... An enlightening journey of self discovery." Right-Martin said, eyeing Left-Martin reflectively. "I... didn't realize I’m quite so… argumentative."

Despite himself Jon snorted while Left-Martin rolled his eyes "Well..."

Right-Martin tightened his grip on Jon's back "Oh, be quiet you."

"I was going to say it goes both ways." Left-Martin smirked. "We had some important things to discuss so the split just... happened. Sort of underwhelming compared to what we're assuming you just went through, to be honest."

"Yeah." Right-Martin agreed.

"Hmm" Jon hummed, letting himself lean into Right-Martin's arms. He was quite groggy and being surrounded like this did not help him regain his attentiveness. Left-Martin stepped forward to sandwich Jon even further and buried his face in Jon's tousled hair. Right-Martin sighed and brought his arms down to tighten around Jon's lower back. Jon's breath stuttered slightly.

"So... Helen's gone then." Right-Martin said quietly.

"Yes." Jon breathed.

"Time to mourn?" Left-Martin asked. He lowered one hand to catch Jon's. It was a bit awkward in this position but his hand felt warm and secure so Jon wasn't complaining.

"You can if you want..." He looked up from Right-Martin's chest to his face. "Do you? want to mourn?"

"A bit? I mean, she was our friend, sort of."

"No she wasn't and you know it" Left-Martin quipped, squeezing Jon's hand. "She was just pretending to be our friend. Probably thought she had something to gain from it. You know how the Distortion is."

"Yeah, I guess. But she was one of the only other people we met on our journey that we could actually talk to. That must count for something, hm?"

"Maybe. But Jon killed her and probably had a good reason to, no?"

"Yeah, you're probably right, as usual." Right-Martin conceded begrudgingly.

"Well, when I'm right you're right. I'm you." Left-Martin stated and then unprompted leaned forward and planted a kiss on the Archivist’s left cheek.

Jon, who was half listening to the back and forth banter while blissfully basking in all that was his wonderful boyfriend Martin, started. "Wha-"

"Hey!" Right-Martin exclaimed.

Left-Martin rolled his eyes again. "Come on, you know you want to. Look how lovely and adorable he is." He pecked Jon's cheek again. Jon’s face was at this point so warm he felt like a Desolation domain in the making.

"Fine, yeah I do." Right-Martin tentatively looked at Jon who stared back wide eyed and gently leaned to plant an identical kiss on his right cheek.

Jon was almost gone at this point. This was more overwhelming than the confusion the Distortion tried to enforce on him. He hugged Right-Martin back with one arm and squeezed Left-Martin hand where it held his. They stayed that way for another moment before Jon gently extracted himself from between them, attempting to regain some semblance of control. He coughed and moved to straighten his hopelessly disheveled clothes and hair.

He could feel Martin slowly returning to himself, the effect of his domain wearing off as Left-Martin began fading while drifting closer to Right-Martin with a wispy, floating quality about him.

Jon was a bit disappointed at that. But maybe it was for the best. He's not sure he'd be able to handle having two of his boyfriend, even in the long run. Especially in the long run.

"M-Martin. Um... That was... Interesting. Th-thank you for the kisses."

Left-Martin let out one final snort before he faded into Right-Martin and became just. Martin.

They looked at each other a moment longer, drinking in one another's sight with endless affection. Jon broke the silence.

"If you need a moment to adjust, to... to mourn, take your time. But not too long."

Martin sighed in mixed relief and melancholy as he felt the effects of the merge. He smiled at Jon gently and asked "Why the sudden rush?"

"See that over there?" Jon pointed to the grey horizon, dark shapes sticking out like strange twisted fingers. "That's London"

"Oh." Martin said in a hushed tone. He laced his fingers with Jon's as they stood there, taking in the view.

"This is it then. The final leg of the journey."

"Yes." Jon said. "Let's find out if my efforts to clear our path were actually worthwhile."

"Hmm?" Martin hummed, confused.

"I'll explain on the way. Come on let's go."

He smiled fondly, oh so fondly at Martin, squeezing his hand.

Martin smiled back, lifted the hand to kiss it and stepped forward.

Jon followed suit and hand in hand they walked away from their meeting point, towards the unknown fate ahead.

[bywhatilove]

“The Friend Trap” Chapter Five

“Actually,” Fabian began as he stood up, “I’ll go talk to her.”

Before either Eddie or KT could interject by reminding him of the headspace Nina was in at the moment and that maybe it would be best to send either of them out there, he was out the door.

“Oh boy,” KT gulped as she laid her head onto her palms. “Why did I let you talk me into this?”

Eddie’s eyes widened with shock. “Me? Talk you into this? K.T, may I care to remind you that this was all your idea!”

“I was hoping you would forget about that…” she muttered under her breath. “We are screwed, Eddie. Nina is never going to forgive me for keeping all of this a secret from her. Fabian is going to be pissed at you for ambushing him.”

“Oh my god. Would you relax?” Eddie leaned back into his chair like he did not have a care in the world. “Nina and Fabian will thank us for this one day. Probably not today…. but someday.”

“Yeah. Okay. Sure.” KT stated out loud, mostly for her own benefit. She gestured towards an empty spot by the window, which would give the two a front seat for the Nina and Fabian reunite show. “I guess we should give them their privacy.”

Eddie nodded his head in agreement. Yet, not even a moment later, the two found themselves racing for the empty chair that would provide them with the best view.

“No fair!” K.T whisper-screamed as Eddie pounced down onto it first.

“As Nina’s Osarian and sworn protector, Fabian’s roommate and best friend AND the one who has known them longer, I think that I rightfully deserve the front row seat for their reunion.” Eddie replied as his eyes took focus on two of his best friends.

K.T rolled her eyes, but all of those were factual statements, and, well, you can’t argue with the facts. So, she begrudgingly took the seat behind him and strained her neck to get a view of what was going on.

Outside, Nina and Fabian had their backs turned away from the coffee shop facing towards the street, which meant that all KT and Eddie could see was their backside as Nina sat on a bench and Fabian stood behind her.

“Oh what I would give to be a fly on that bench,” K.T blurted.

“That’s a good sign,” Eddie noted as the pair watched as Fabian took the empty seat beside Nina.

A few moments of silence passed, with only the occasional hand gesture or body movement to understand what was being said. But that didn’t stop Eddie from providing his own commentary.

“Right now they are both professing their undying, unconditional love for their other. Nina is apologizing for leaving the way she did. Fabian is accepting it. They are making an oath to never break up again. Next, they are going to come in here holding hands being all adorable again and live happily ever after.”

K.T snickered. “Is that your osarian senses tingling or just your own Eddie Miller instincts.”

“That is just common sense,” he replied straight faced. “They are Nina and Fabian. They have survived much, much worse than this.”

Suddenly, Fabian stood up from the bench. He began walking back towards the shop before he stopped in his tracks. K.T and Eddie watched him tell Nina something without even allowing a glance back in her direction. His face was stone cold, nothing like the shy smile K.T and Eddie knew and loved. Whatever he said (K.T and Eddie had never wished they could read lips more than in this moment), must have delivered a final punch to Nina. She let her elbows fall onto her knees and her head collapsed into her palms.

“Hate to break it to you bud, but I think common sense failed ya.” K.T declared unwillingly.

“Go, go, go,” Eddie ushered K.T back away from the window and to their original table. The two barely made it back as the door opened and Fabian entered the room- looking absolutely pissed.

“I’m heading out,” he grunted, “going for a walk. I just need to clear my head. Text me your address, K.T, and I’ll be there later this evening.” He started to walk away towards the back door to ensure he wouldn’t have an awkward encounter with Nina on the way out. Just before he walked through the door, he turned his head almost as if he was about to say something more. Yet, he decided against it and left with a simple shake of the head.

K.T and Eddie glanced at one another.

“Well, with all considering, that wasn’t too bad.” K.T shrugged. The two had accepted a much worse blow up from their meddling. It wouldn’t have shocked them too much if Nina or Fabian refused to speak to them for a couple days. Or if Fabian had bought a ticket straight back to England on the earliest flight available. Or if Nina decided to escape the city by taking a spontaneous trip to see her gran.

Eddie gently shook his head. “Don’t get too relieved. Fabian has always been the more level headed and calm of those two. I love Nina, but she is known for acting impulsively and not the most level headed. It’s usually because of her love for her friends and determination to keep them safe, even if that means she has to brave all of problems on her own. Hence her leaving without a trace senior year….I’m rambling, aren’t I?”

K.T nodded her head. “You do that when you get nervous.”

An uncomfortable silence fell over the two as they sat and waited for the tidal wave that could be Nina Martin’s anger. They didn’t have to wait long, though, as Nina soon entered back into the shop. She didn’t look mad… but rather just upset. And somehow, that was all the much worse. Her eyes gave away that tears had recently escaped them and her red tinted face was proof of her distress.

“I’m just gonna head back to the apartment,” she gestured back towards the door. “I guess I’ll see you guys tonight.”

Neither K.T or Eddie had the chance to respond before she was out the door.

“She wasn’t mad at us, which is a lot better than I expected.” K.T began to nervously play with her nails.

Eddie let out a deep sigh before responding. “No, she wasn’t. But she looked so…”

“Broken.” K.T interjected.

“Yeah. They both did. Which honestly makes me feel a lot worse than I would have if they came back here guns-a-blazing and screaming at us.”

“What do you think is going to happen between the two of them? And I don’t want any of your fairytale happy ending b.s.”

Eddie took a moment to sit with this. He did want to give her his honest answer. “Honestly? I’ve heard stories from Amber and Patricia about infamous Fabian and Nina fights. Apparently they can be brutal sometimes. Yet, what neither realizes is that they are usually fighting over the same thing. Nina wants to keep Fabian safe by keeping him far away from any of her chosen one craziness and Fabian wants to keep Nina safe by being right by her side every time something happens. So eventually they erupt into some huge massive argument because they are both so darn stubborn. I mean...that is what this is all about, right?”

K.T looked puzzled like she wasn't quite following.

“Oh, yeah, I forget, I have known them longer and do know them better.” Eddie playfully nudged K.T with his shoulder before continuing. “Fabian is mad at Nina for leaving like she did and she left like she did because she was trying to protect Fabian and the rest of us. Obviously, it didn’t work because she didn’t take into account that egyptain gods and curses love to torture us with or without Nina around. So we just have to make both of them see that they were trying to achieve the same thing and ba-bang. They’re back together!”

“You make that sound a lot easier than it is going to be…” K.T huffed.

Eddie flicked his hand jokingly. “Pfff, no way Rush. My osarian senses are ah tingling and I can promise that everything is going to work out. Nina and Fabian are obviously meant for one another. Anyone can see it. Well, anyone but themselves that is.”

“Like you and Patricia are meant for one another?” She winked at Eddie. “How are you two, actually? With all the Fabian and Nina drama, I completely forgot to ask.”

“Amazing. I mean, long distance sucks butt. But, her university is only two hours drive from mine and Fabian’s. We’ll make it work. I know we will.” Eddie suddenly became fidgety, like he was nervous to say what came next. “She’s the one, ya know? I can’t see myself with anyone else.”

K.T responded by looking at him with adoration and a hint of something else. Something Eddie couldn’t put his finger one. “What is it?”

“Oh...it’s nothing,” K.T gently shook his head. “It’s just that, who knew Anubis House was such a place for matchmaking. You and Patricia. Nina and Fabian. Heck, even Willow and Alfie are still going strong. Sometimes I just feel like I missed out, that’s all.”

Eddie playfully hit her on the shoulder. “Hey now, I don’t want to hear any of that self-deprecation. You are a total catch, K.T Rush, and you are going to make one very, very lucky girl extremely happy one day.”

K.T jokingly rolled her eyes, but Eddie continued speaking. “Now, where is that tacky tourist New York City experience I was promised? I didn’t fly all the way here just to sit in a coffee shop all day and worry over Fabian and Nina. Let's go!” He grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the door. Eddie Miller was promised a tour of NYC, and a tour of it he shall receive.

A couple hours later, hours full of buying extremely tacky NYC decor from touristy shops, taking even more tacky selfies from NYC tourist staples and plenty of food pit stops. K.T and Eddie's phones dinged simultaneously. It was a text from Nina.

"Could y'all come back to the apartment? We need to talk."

"Oh boy," K.T breathed.

"Oh, boy, indeed," Eddie agreed. "Be there in 15." He responded to Nina's text as the two made their way towards the newest Subway stop and made their way back to K.T and Nina's apartment.

--------

When the two walked in, Nina was sitting on the couch.

"Nins, hey there girl!" K.T called out nervously, trying desperately to hide her nerves and caution the blow.

Nina turned her head and her expression was all but the smiling girl K.T had grown to love. "K.T...Eddie...."

"We can explain," Eddie began.

"I'm all ears," Nina gestured to the open seats beside her. Eddie and K.T sat beside her, looking like a couple deers who were caught in headlights. As much as they loved Nina, she could be pretty terrifying. Even without her ability to call on the Egyptian Gods whenever she pleased, an unhappy Nina Martin was a Nina you wanted to steer clear from.

“Where do we start? Why don't you go ahead, Eddie?" K.T shot her glance over towards the boy sitting next to her. "After all, what were you saying earlier, you have known Nina and Fabian the longest and you do know them better..as her osarian and all that fun stuff."

Eddie grimaced at the way K.T used his previous words against him like a weapon. "Yeah...where do we start?"

Nina interrupted him before he had the chance to begin, though. "How about how the two of you know one another? And what happened senior year?”

Eddie and K.T chuckled nervously. “That’s a really funny story, actually,” Eddie began.

“Eddie,” Nina pleaded, “I stayed away to try and protect you all from any more curses and danger craziness. You said something about a great evil? And, K.T, you know about Sibuna?”

No longer did Nina sound angry about Eddie and K.T messing around in her relationship with her and Fabian’s relationship nor was she sad about what Fabian had told her, but rather she sounded like a friend who was desperate to protect those whom she loved. So, K.T and Eddie told her everything. They told her of keys and visions, of crypts and frozen men, of secret sisters, of sinners and tricks and, as they told her, Nina’s heart broke with every word.

[caranfindel]

Recap/review 14.04: “Mint Condition “

THEN: Michael's gone. Supposedly. Dean feels bad. Ghosts are a thing. Salt circles. Monster Kaia's magic spear.

NOW: A comic book/collectibles store. The camera pans over a variety of figurines and memorabilia, including a poster for the movie Hell Hazers, which you may remember from Hollywood Babylon, (thank you, Continuity Fairy!) and briefly pauses on a poster for the movie All Saints' Day before showing a television. Someone's watching Shocker TV, showing scary movies "24 hours a day, all week long." We see clips from Route 666 and that movie they were filming in Hollywood Babylon, whose name escapes me, as well as from a movie we will eventually find out is All Saint's Day. Cut to a guy unpacking a box of collectibles under the watchful eye of a long-haired freak right out of All Saints' Day. I keep waiting for this guy to realize he's being watched, but I am the one who eventually comes to a realization - that's not a guy, it's a statue.

The guy unpacks a box and literally drops it in shock. Because it's haunted, right? No, it's just a Thundercats collectible figure Panthro, in its original box. (No one in my house knows anything about Thundercats, but I assume this is a real character.) He stuffs the box in a backpack, and then his phone rings. The incoming call is a video call, which is weird, because people this age don't even call each other, let alone via video, but it makes for better television, so we'll let it go.

The caller is a girl named Sam, who is apparently his boss. She immediately starts berating the guy for his bad customer service, which resulted in a negative Yelp review. He promises to do better and confirms that she's coming over for game night. Stewart picks up his bag and a set of keys on a Batman keyring and locks up the store, under the watchful eye of the creepy statue.

(Boy, this is a lot of recap before we even get to the title card...)

We see Stewart at his house, arguing with a pizza delivery place. Panthro is sitting on a table and he turns and looks at him. It's surprisingly well done, BTW. Stewart turns to see Panthro on the floor, gets closer, watches Panthro swing his mace, and then screams.

Title card!

Bunker. Dean's lying on his bed, eating pizza and watching Hatchet Man: All Saints' Day, which is a gloriously cheesy salute to the 80s. Well, I'm glad he finally got a TV in his room, but does this mean the Fortress of Deanitude is no more? Is it full of refugee hunters now? Aw, that's sad.

{Sidebar: I wonder if this movie is called All Saints' Day because they knew the episode would be shown on All Saints' Day, and were being meta/clever? Or is it just supposed to be a riff on the Halloween franchise?}

Sam comes in and asks what he's doing, and when Dean looks up, he's shocked to see the Beard of Despair is gone. "Why are you so surprised?" Sam says. "Obviously, judging from my glorious scruff, it's been a few days since I shaved. Have you really not seen me in a day or two?" (No, he doesn't really say that.) But Dean says "it's so smooth; it's like a dolphin's belly." And it's not. It's really not. And as much as I love the scruff - which is quite a bit - I'd also like to see Sam's pretty face smooth as a dolphin's belly sometime. Just sayin'.

Sam (still) wonders if Dean's okay, since he hasn't really come out of his room in a week, which I guess explains how he missed the Big Shave. Dean expositions that Cas is "showing Jack the ropes," because if Jack wants to learn how to be a hunter, there's no better teacher than Cas, right? Absolutely no one. And with Monster!Kaia and Michael "in the wind," and his home full of strangers, Dean apparently figures he's got nothing better to do than hole up in his room watching Hatchet Man movies. (Is Hatchet Man the franchise, and All Saints' Day just one of the titles? I'm having trouble getting a grip on this.)

He knows Sam doesn't get it, because Sam doesn't even like scary movies. "Our life is a scary movie," Sam points out. And speaking of which, he's found a case. He shows Dean a YouTube video of a bloodied Stewart describing his Panthro attack, and I wish I could take credit for this catch, but I saw it on Tumblr... look at the left side of the screen. The "Recommended for You" videos are about zombies, a conspiracy theory, and how to clean your sink, which are all very interesting, but look at the "Up Next" video.

IT'S A FUNNY CAT VIDEO. HAS SAM BEEN WATCHING FUNNY CAT VIDEOS?

Oh, Sammy knows just what he's doing, and I love him for it. He's all, we don't have to take this case involving KILLER THUNDERCAT TOYS if you're not interested, but he's got Dean exactly where he wants him.

His smug little face at the end of this scene gives me life.

Guys, I was so ready for this. A MotW, and Sam giving Dean a hunt he knows he'll enjoy just to help him kick his Michael blues... This is the show I'm here for!

The guys show up at the comic book store dressed like absolute dorks, in short-sleeved shirts and ties. Sam has a pocket protector. I don't know why. But it's single-layer Winchesters and I'm gonna embrace it. Looks like this episode is happening on Halloween and not on All Saints' Day, because they're accosted by costumed children outside the store. Dean comments that Sam still isn't a fan of Halloween (which we've known ever since the pilot; thanks again to the Continuity Fairy). Sam confirms.

Apparently this red mask is a character Jensen voiced in an animation? And of course Jared was in House of Wax. Pretty deep meta here, Show.

BossLady!Sam is there, wearing a red plaid shirt, and Dean comments that she's like Sam's twin. "I don't know what you're talking about," Sam says, as he and BossLady!Sam tuck their hair behind their ears in sync, and I die.

That’s me, in a puddle on the floor.

“Soft, delicate features," Dean points out. "Luxurious hair. She's like your Wonder Twin." All of this is true, Dean, and good on you for noticing that your brother has soft, delicate features and luxurious hair. Sam notices a guy stocking the shelves - black All Saints' Day t-shirt, shortish spiky hair, lollipop just like the one Dean snagged at the door - and says "if that's me, then that's you over there."

Dean's distracted (and delighted) by the Hatchet Man statue, giving him the name David Yaeger. {Sidebar: did you know the word jager means hunter in German?} His doppelganger encourages him to push a button that plays his catch phrases from the movie, including "we all do bad things sometimes." Which is, like Dean's motto. Dean's joy is infectious and adorable.

BossLady!Sam finishes her business with the police and asks what she can do to help the guys, offering "Funko Pops, Magic cards," and given the number of Supernatural Funko Pops decorating my office, I'm pleased with that shout-out. Sam asks about Stewart as Dean asks about vintage Hot Wheels, and Dean, I am very sad to inform you that Hot Wheels apparently never made a 1967 Chevy Impala.

The guys introduce themselves as Ian Gillan and Ritchie Blackmore (Deep Purple, The Husband points out) from Campbell and Sons Insurance (hee!), wanting to speak to Stewart. Presumably not about Hot Wheels, unless he got run over by one. They'd gone to his place, but his roommate said he moved out. Or got kicked out. BossLady!Sam explains that Stewart is an "acquired taste" who makes a lot of online enemies, and he can be found at his mom's house.

I still don't understand why the guys are dressed like nerds. Is it a Halloween costume? Because we've seen them as insurance agents before, and they were wearing regular suits.

Mom's house. Mom puts a couple of mugs on the table - one is a superhero (Flash, maybe?) and one is decorated with cats - and announces that Stewie will be up in just a minute. Dean reaches for the superhero mug, even though it was placed in front of Sam, but the joke's on you, Dean, because we now know Sam likes cats! But more importantly, Dean has added a pair of black Clark Kent eyeglasses to his getup. WHY? I mean, it's hilarious, but WHY?

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE.

We hear Stewart pitching a fit in the basement. He stomps upstairs and sees the Winchesters, and I know the guy in the store was supposed to be Dean's avatar, but this guy is wearing a RED SHIRT WITH A SQUIRREL ON IT. COME ON .

Truly a Red Shirt of Bad Decisions.

We learn that Sam is aware of Fortnight, and Dean notices the smell of burning sage. Stewart explains that he dated a goth chick who told him it would bring good luck, but he broke up before they could "merl." Dean's as confused as I am about "merl," but Sam explains it's MIRL - Meet In Real Life. Dean asks how he knows what that means, and Sam very quickly changes the subject. And this opens up all sorts of interesting possibilities, doesn't it, regarding Sam's online activities and his knowledge of MIRLing, and that would certainly be an entertaining rabbit hole to go down, and I hope some of y'all indulge in that, fic-wise or meta-wise or whatever. I look forward to reading it.

Anyway. Sam asks about the Panthro attack, and Stewart jumps in to say he made it up. When Dean presses, he gets mad and kicks them out of the house and then we cut to an exterior shot and WHAT THE FUCK? NOW DEAN HAS A TACKY CHECKERED BLAZER? It's like he's slowly turning into Matt Foley from SNL. At some point in this episode he's got to say something about living in a van down by the river.

Dean refers to Stewart as "Big Bang," which reminds me that I meant to ask, when we first learned his name, if he was a shout-out to Stewart the comic book store owner on Big Bang Theory. {Sidebar: Would this be a reciprocal shout-out, since that show has a character named Kripke? Is there a connection I don't know about?} Given Stewart's Wiccan girlfriend, they think the toy might have been under a spell, and they decide to check the house for hex bags later. Although I don't know how she would have left any in the house, since they never MIRLed.

Later. The guys are sitting in the car, still outside Stewart's house, when a little lumberjack and vampire walk by. Look, it’s Dean and Benny!

Sam’s instructing someone to use lamb's blood and "stay safe," because he's still Chief, Dean, whether you like it or not. Dean asks "seriously, what is your deal with Halloween," and "don't give me that 'every day is Halloween for us' crap." It's kind of odd that he doesn't already know. I mean, we already know. His life is Halloween. And his mother died two days after Halloween. {Sidebar: Is it just headcanon, fueled by fanfic, that John got blind stupid drunk every year around the anniversary of Mary's death? Or is that canon?} The conversation is interrupted when Stewart's mom leaves the house, and the guys have to duck - toward each other - to avoid being seen. It's ridiculous and hilarious and I love it.

Dean could have just taken off the Clark Kent glasses.

Sam suspects Stewart changed his story because he's being brutally mocked online. And he won't say the word bitch. Is this something we can't do now that we're airing at an earlier hour, Show? Then Stewart comes out of the house, bloody and screaming for help. Dean goes inside, gun drawn, and follows a trail of blood to Stewart's man cave (um, boy cave?). As he gazes at a Texas Chainsaw Massacre poster, he hears a chain saw, which hurtles into the room and barely misses his pretty head.

Hospital. Stewart's mom, still in costume, sits at his side and thanks the guys for saving his life. She wants to go home and get his favorite pillow, but they convince her to stay. "Everything's fine," Dean tells her. "Everything is not fine," he says to Sam, as they leave the room. He says he swept the room for hex bags and found nothing, but the EMF went crazy. So it's a ghost. Hey, guys, you should have watched the "Then." We already knew that. Dean is going to stay at the hospital and keep Mom from going back to the house, while Sam asks around to see if anybody "got dead lately."

At the house, Sam finds the light switch in the Den of Stewartitude doesn't work, even though a lamp and computer monitors are turned on in the room. He laughs at himself for being startled by the Panthro toy and says "nice, Sam, smooth," and for some reason this just almost makes my heart burst open. The toy isn't putting off EMF now, which he finds odd. Then he looks at one of the monitors and sees a group photo of Stewart, LadyBoss!Sam, Dean's doppelganger, and an older man.

Back at the hospital, Dean's doppelganger is standing outside Stewart's darkened room. He is wearing an army green canvas jacket and has acquired some scruff of his own and he's just such a precious little mini Dean; I can't stand it. He asks what Dean's doing there, and Dean says he's just keeping an eye on Stewart. "He must have awesome insurance," Doppelganger says. Which is very funny, and also very Dean, because he says "awesome" so much. I love it.

Dirk explains that Stewart is a jerk, but he's his best friend, and he's there when Dirk needs him. They eat pizza and watch movies and who else does that, my friends? You know who. Then the guys bond over their love of scary movies, and it looks like the franchise is actually called All Saints' Day. I'm sure you were really dying to know. Stewart comments that no hospital would ever be that empty, and Dean says he's been to a lot of hospitals at night, and "trust me, it gets pretty empty," and at first that's just heartbreaking because I figure he was at these hospitals because John or Sam were injured. But maybe he's just thinking about hunts in hospitals. (Again, I need to differentiate fic-fueled headcanon from actual canon.) And then Dean says he likes to watch movies "where I know the bad guy's gonna lose" and yep, my heart is definitely broken.

Sam shows up at the store and asks BossLady!Sam if anyone close to Stewart has died lately. She explains that Jordan, who used to own the store, was kind of a Willy Wonka to her, Stewart, and Dirk (Aha! His name is Dirk! Which is close to Dean, and hasn't Dean actually been called Dirk before?). He died and left the store to BossLady!Sam and Dirk. Not Stewart, because he fired him twice for stealing. But she hired him back because he's a friend. It seems like Stewart has better friends than he deserves. She tells Sam that Jordan was cremated, and then we see something frosting over behind her.

Sam is adorable, trying to look casual as he pulls out his EMF meter and it lights up like a Christmas tree. He tells her it's a carbon monoxide detector and she needs to leave. He starts to tell her she's in danger, and then the David Yeager statue smacks him into the comic book display and knocks him out cold. Even though he hits it with his back. (Handwave!)

When he wakes up, BossLady!Sam is terrified but unhurt. She gets a quick version of the "monsters are real" speech and finds that the door is locked, and Hatchet Man took the keys. He throws something at the door, but it's shatterproof glass. Apparently Jordan was serious about thieves, which explains why he's so keen on killing Stewart, that Panthro-stealing little asshole.

He calls Dean, who's fanboying with Dirk about horror movies, and tells him it's Jordan's ghost. And the David Yaeger figure is on its way. Dean can hardly believe his luck. He pours a ring of salt around Stewart's bed, having given him the speech, and orders him to stay in it. Boy, it's a good thing they reminded us what salt is for in the "Then," or else we'd be really confused right now.

Store. BossLady!Sam figured out what I did, that Jordan wants to kill Stewart because he's a thief. She says she's been taking money out of his check to pay for what he steals, but Jordan wouldn't know that. Sam breaks his lockpick, and then asks if they have any cleaning supplies.

Hospital. Ghost stuff starts happening in Stewart's room, and Dirk panics and flees. Dean takes a hatchet out of a fire emergency box, even though I think that would probably set off a fire alarm. (Handwave!) Dirk's mom is carrying a tray of food from the cafeteria and comes across the Yaeger figure. She drops her tray and screams, just like the woman in the movie. Dirk shows up and puts on a stern face and tells Jordan that if he's going to kill his friend, he has to go through him. Oh Dirk, you sweet little thing, you're channeling Dean so hard now and I adore you. Jordan does come for Dirk, who says "crap" and runs off. There's a funny sequence where we cut back and forth between Dirk and some hospital guards who are watching All Saints' Day and ignoring the actual mayhem happening on their monitors.

Meanwhile, Sam is mixing drain cleaner and something else in a Scooby Doo lunchbox. {Sidebar: I'm not a Scooby Doo fan, but I love the show's constant references to it and the way the Continuity Fairy always remembers Dean's a fan.} BossLady!Sam asks how he learned to do this, and he says "I had a messed up childhood." It's funny because it's true. He hangs the lunchbox bomb on the door and they hide behind the desk. After it blows the door open, they both slowly peek over the desk and simultaneously say "cool." I'm starting to love Sam and his little doppelganger too.

Hospital. Dirk hides in the morgue (no, Dirk, never in the morgue!) and gets a scary hand on his shoulder, but it's Dean. Then a body on one of the gurneys sits up. Yeah, it's Yaeger.

At this point there's a fake movie promo for All Saints' Day III: The Reckoning. It starts out "Three Years Ago," which reminds me very much of a certain scene that starts out "Twenty two years ago." Looks like David Yaeger was killed in a fire on October 31, 1983, which is two days before Mary Winchester dies in a fire. Oh, you clever, clever show.

Back to the show. Dean gleefully fights the Yaeger figure. At least he's gleeful until it seems he's not doing very well. Sam and BossLady!Sam show up, and she's wearing Jared's coat from the EW Halloween photoshoot last year.

Bless you, Show.

She figures out that Jordan must be attached to the Batman keychain. Meanwhile, Dean is cornered, and about to get axed, when precious little badass Dirk stabs Jordan in the back. It doesn't kill him, of course, but it gives Dean a chance to get up and start losing the fight again. The Sams run in and BossLady!Sam figures out that alcohol will help them burn the keychain faster. Whoosh! There goes Jordan, and the statue falls lifeless to the floor.

Aftermath. The guys tell Dirk and BossLady!Sam that everyone is safe now. The Impala scene starts with Dean thanking Sam for "giving me a win." Sam asks him to stop hiding out in his room. "What happened with Michael, you said yes for me, for Jack, for your family. You did the right thing." He says nothing Michael did afterward is Dean's fault, and he needs to stop blaming himself.

"I'm never gonna get over it, okay?" Dean says. "I'm just not." And once again, Sam could say "yes, I understand how you feel, because I've been there too," not to make this all about him, but just to commiserate and show Dean that he's not just blowing off his horrific experience, he knows how bad it was and he might have some good ideas about getting past it. And once again, he does not. But that's okay. What isn't okay is what happens next. Dean asks again why Sam hates Halloween, and Sam tells some ridiculous story about having a crush on a girl in sixth grade and throwing up on her at her Halloween party, and you know what? I just refuse to accept this. WE KNOW WHY SAM HATES HALLOWEEN. AND IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH A GIRL IN SIXTH GRADE. I don't know why you're doing this to me, Davy Perez. You're usually so good about canon. I cannot accept that Sam Winchester, whose entire life has been Halloween, whose mother died two days after Halloween, is distressed because of something that happened in sixth grade. I'm going to pretend this part never happened. Who's with me?

Dean says that next year, he and Sam are going to wear couples costumes (and if you happened to be wearing your shipping goggles, I think I heard you squealing). Batman and Robin. Bert and Ernie. (!) Rocky and Bullwinkle. (!!) Shaggy and Scooby. Turner and Hooch. Ren and Stimpy. Thelma and Louise. "We just it in drive and go." {Sidebar: Who wants the show to end that way, Thelma and Louise style?}

Meanwhile, back at the hospital, one of those useless security guards finds the Yaeger figure in the morgue. The guys left it there? Oh well. It's a good horror movie ending.

So! For the most part, this was just what I needed after three episodes of mytharc. A good MOTW with lots of humor and nods to canon. On the other hand, there's that one thing. But since I'm ignoring that one thing, I guess this was a fantastic episode! What did you guys think?

Please help me stay unspoiled, thanks!

[hyungkyun]

(^:

HENLO!!! this is ur actual bday present, not that Gross thing i sent earlier lol. again, do whatever u want with it!! u dont have to post it or anything. it’s just easier to submit stuff like this than to, idk, send u an email like a señora lol.

ok so im doing this in bullet point format bc the last time I wrote a coherent, well-written paragraph was like 5 years ago or smth. anyway!! since u hated soooo much my beautiful, amazing, unique goths au im going with the loser couple au… which was also a college au of sorts?? dskjhksjdf this isn’t even an au, since y’all are already losers tbh (^: this also got out of hand…. this shit is eight pages long. idk enjoy bithc.

first of all, ck the kind of dude everyone’s lowkey scared of bc he’s silent and serious af. also he does seem kind of a weirdo, tbh?

youve seen him around, maybe you’re in the same dorms but u have absolutely no idea what he’s majoring in :o and u ask around but no one has any idea either!! oh wow a mystery~~

BUT he’s kinda cute hmmm (^: and u probably find the weirdo vibe interesting

however it’s so hard to get to talk to him. u always run into him when you’re out with friends or in a hurry to get to class so :///

but destiny works in mysterious ways~~~ and once u meet it’s rly. so unexpected.

actually, it’s awful since u get locked out of ur dorm sound familiar?? during winter break, rly late at night after a long study session at the library yes, the library, fight me. so u kinda just. sit down miserably outside ur room, since ur roommates are gone, cursing everything and everyone. u will eventually go looking for someone to help u out or smth but right now u need to Whine.

but oh my!! enter mister im changkyun!!! that weirdo who actually lives a couple of doors away from u (how come you never found out wtf???)

he sees u basking in ur misery and actually. finds u rly cute??? bc you’re pouting, cursing a little under ur breath, fumbling with ur phone. but u also look angry as fuck, ready to kill a man??? and yet you’re really fucking cute what the hell!!!!

so he comes up to u and asks u what’s wrong, to which u answer not so nicely without even looking up from ur phone, bc you’re rly so done with this situation ://

but then u look up and u See who it is fuck fuck fuck fuckfucbicvufkhkcfj

but since ck’s Nice and he understands that u must be having an awful time (and also bc he thinks youre cute) he offers to help u. you’re kind of skeptical since he’s just another student, what could he do???

until he tells u he knows how to pick locks lmaoaoaoaoa. that lil weirdo (‘:

anyway he saves ur night. but since he’s an annoying lil shit he’ll tease u abt it every time he runs into u for the rest of winter break.

since that day y'all basiclly become an old, bickering, married couple fnsdjdj

u never stop annoying each other…. you’re wearing a hoodie? he’ll probably pull the hood all the way down until it covers ur eyes, and u get him back by messing up his hair which, by the way,is so soft….. hmmmm

u call each other nerd and loser and dumbass all the time lmao. he’ll constantly bring up the way u met just to jokingly say that you’d be lost without him :/// he rly is a lil shit.

it’s funny bc everyone figures out u are falling for each other… except u two. and i rly do mean everyone. ur friends. his friends. ur roommates. ur cat. the janitor, too, probably. it’s so obvious it hurts.

one time someone implies u would be a cute couple and y'all literally go all ‘no???? haha me??? liking that loser??? pfft not in a million years’

it’s the biggest lie, of course (: and ever since that person suggested u would look good together, both of u kind of realize it’d be… nice. more than nice. actually, super nice.

but since both of u are dumb tsunderes,  as ive said before, u will literally be the embodiment of this scene… except it goes both ways. honestly u are so gone for each other it’s GROSS.

but we need some angst up in here so y'all dont get together for a reaaaaaaally long time :/ smh. the pining is Real. ppl come and go in ur lives, and each person u go out with sees that u already fell for someone else—and that’s why all potential relationships don’t last much–, but sdjkfhksjdhk!!! neither of u want to openly admit it.

it’s A Mess bc u are actually good friends and u tell each other abt ur dates and stuff—secretly hoping the other will do something—but y'all looove being dumb so u act like it’s all cool and be like ‘o rly!! good for u, i hope it works out’. right. :/

y’all keep dancing around each other for several months until one Merciful Soul gets tired of ur shit and forces u to sort things out. im talking abt locking u up in some room and not letting u out until u stop pretending u aren’t disgustingly in love with each other. or smthequally cheesy (: u know ilove cheese

((obviously everyone eavesdrops through the door bc cmon, theyve been waiting for this for sooooo long))

at first u two are just annoyed at the Merciful Soul betchait was minhyuk, and u spend ur time yelling and cursing them for doing this (all while claiming that this is pointless, since u have NO feelings for each other. none. nada!)

after a very long time, it’s ck the one that confesses first lmao. youve been whining and being grumpy the whole time youve been locked up together and it kinda reminded him of the way u met… damn. here come The Feelings.

he’s tired, and there’s nothing left to lose. so he tells u The Truth.

[suspenseful pause….. what’s going to happen next?? :OOOOO]……… tune in next year to find out, in the continuation of Cristina’s Cheesy Birthday Present!!!

jk, proceed to the next bullet point pls.

obviously u tell him u feel the same way [insert ppl crying in the background] and he’s actually shocked when u say u like him back…. and gosh, he does look cute when he’s surprised…

so yeah!!! it’s until then that u FINALLY go on a date during the weekend!!. hallelujah. thanks minhyuk,u beautiful soul.

so!!! ok!! first date!!! a rly cute fairground in the evening!!!

u try to be fake mean to each other like u used to but everything feels different~~~ (^:

so instead y’all act bashful as hell, and blush at everything jjdfghjfhd. hands brushing accidentally?? BLUSH. eyes meeting? BLUSH. BLUSH BLUSH BLUSH!!! u also laugh at everything bc both of u are so nervous oh gmhg fdknjjkdsfjoidf this is gross.

he’ll tell bad jokes to make u laugh and they’re rly so so so bad that he actually keeps u in stitches. if u look rly closely you’ll see his huge ass heart eyes bc !!!! he made u laugh!!!! and u look so pretty when u laugh omg!!!! dis-gos-tinnnnn

it’d be such a cute date tbh im crying just thinking abt it (‘’’’: obviously he’s a gentleman and he lets u choose what to eat, which ride to go to first, etc. u could literally tell him ‘hey let’s just sit down and do nothing’ and he’d say yes. he’s so gONe, ifmgfjdmf.

he’s kinda quiet and a lot shier than u wouldve expected but youre literally melting bc that’s a new side to him that you’d never thought you’d see.

u end up having so much fun (‘: u gross lil idiots, u.

oh and he’s def the type to ask if he can kiss u at the end of the night EYYYYYY

even if u find that incredibly endearing you’ll probably roll ur eyes with a huge ass smile on urlips lmaoaoaoao and call him a dummy for even asking when you’ve literally be in cloud nine since ur date started kjkhwjeqdkwjlk  

[hello, brief break to clarify that from this point i forgot this was actually a college au lmao, so the rest of the bullet points are literally just. random facts abt u two dating hhhhhh. We dont even know what ck’s major is odjfngnfdj]  

at first things are a lil awkward in ur relationship tbh

catch ck googling ‘how to relationship’ on a daily basis dnfndkfjdncn he is sort of clueless abt how to handle The Feelings. mostly bc this is Important and the last thing he wants is to mess it up )^:

that goes away eventually, tho!! he’ll start being his weird little self real fucking soon, so Get Ready

u still call each other nerd and all that stuff, but ur voices are dripping with fondness when u say it… literally everyone around u gets cavities from it, ew.

he’s not that big on planning dates but from time to time he’ll take u to rly cool, unexpected, interesting places :o  and eventually he’ll show u his favorite secret spots ((’:

study dates are a thing. i bet he’s that type of person that enjoys reading in weird ass positions… his legs are like, halfway off the couch and his arm is bent in a way that looks almost painful… what the hell….?? but it’s fine (: it goes so well with ur study methods, those that are Too Weird for the library, yeah?? (:

he will also stare at u a lot bc u look cute when you’re rly focused on smth that is, when u stop  whining abtstudying…

every time u catch him doing that you’ll go all ‘stop staring at me!!! wtf are u looking at u weirdo’ and he’ll answer ‘you’re so pretty~~~ ♥️♥️♥️’. you’ll blush like a lil idiot, naturally (^: hmmmm

and yea, yea. nap dates are a thing too :/// with sleepy forehead kisses and raspy voices and tangled limbs. all that sappy stuff. he’s a lil shit tho, so he’ll sometimes poke ur ribs to tickle u lmao.

buuuut he’ll also take a lot of pics of u sleeping bc he thinks youre cute )))): his faves always end up being his wallpaper for months.

he’ll get strange gifts for u, like rly bizarre plushies and rare books on topics he thinks u will like,  tacky anime memorabilia, etc. he’ll always give them to u at random times bc he just saw them and reminded him of u ♥️  

he makes a lot of playlists for u too!!! pls listen closely, he puts a lot more thought into them than he lets on.

u like his selfies??? well he’ll send u a lot of those. unfortunately, bc he’s a lil shit, he’ll mostly send double chins and weird ass faces from equally weird angles  

from time to time he’ll send u a Nice One tho ((((^: and u know, tongue selfies since youreSO fond of his(and I quote) “5ft tongue”. and oh gosh! is that a tongue piercing…??? eyyyyyy

if u want to take couple selfies then you’re gonna have a real hard time bc he’ll always be making weird faces and poses just to be annoying. eventually u will make dumb faces too tho (’: what a couple of losers

expect weird random texts: he loves telling u abt whatever is on his mind—probably aliens. he thinks a lot abt aliens and the universe. throw some conspiracy theories in there, too—. he’ll also send obscure memes. and a lot of russian cats!!

he’ll love ur cosplay hobbie. he thinks it’s super cool. he’ll call u a nerd but don’t be fooled! he totally brags abt it with his friends (^:

oh! and this is unrelated but at some point y'all will look like an emo goth couple. u won’t even realize that you’re both wearing black and looking Edgy, it’ll just happen spontaneously. tragic 😔

there are a lot of comfortable silences when u hang out, but late night deep convos are also fundamental :o!!! bc y'all are Smort.

he’ll act like f*cboi from time to time tbh?? he’ll tell lots of dirty jokes LMAO. u roll ur eyes at him a lot bc they’re rly. so bad.

if he winks or does Eyebrow Things then u can’t rly roll ur eyes and act like you’re annoyed bc (: u like it (: and u think it suits him (: and he knows it (: (: (:

u get back at him by telling him he’s cute tho, and he’ll get all shy and he’ll stutter and saying “noooooo” while also fighting back a smile

he will also howl or bark at u to annoy u jdfhkjdf. damn f*rry ://

on that note, he loves to embarrass u in front of ur friends bc he’s a lil shit :DD

But he’s also the sweetest??? whenever he sees you’re feeling down he’ll start doing weird shit to make u laugh. if that doesn’t work then he’ll hug u real tight without saying anything else, bc that’s Enough, u know?? (’:

ok time to get Domestic lads!!!

Idk who the hell is going to cook bc y'all are a damn mess in the kitchen. u two try to cook Nice Meals sometimes. seven times out of ten u end up ordering takeout lmao.

be prepared: he sings in the shower, and he does so terribly. (he might do it a little louder and a little more off-key sometimes bc he knows it makes u laugh)

random kisses are a thing!!! he kisses ur cheek or ur shoulder or ur nape or literally. any body part he can get his lips on when u two are just hanging out, watching movies or smth. it’s so soft and cute )^: wtf im crying

but also stolen kisses!! he’ll kiss u at the most unexpected of times and it alwaysleaves u breathless

he’ll constantly put his head on ur shoulder and make this face at u (^:  

can’t sleep??? don’t worry!!! he’ll sing to u with that pretty, soothing voice of his

anyway. what I meant is that y’all would be such cute little idiots together this was long af. wow. im so sorry. happy birthday??? lmao

I HAD TO PUT THIS UNDER A READ MORE BC ITS SO FUCKING LONG NAT U DUMBASS ICB U DID THIS KFJSKFJSLKDJFLKJ THIS IS SO CHEESY AND GROSS and it also made me realize that u know too much shit abt me. what was that t*ngue part. im not talking to u ever again. aNYWAY U RLY ARE AN IDIOT I WAS SMILING SO BIG THRU THIS WHOLE THING MAYBE I SCREAMED A LITTLE?????????? FUCK U!!!!!!!! WHATS WITH ‘The Feelings’ PART I HATE THAT I ALMOST DIED FUCK OFF IM NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!! I DONT HAVE FEELINGS!!!!!! U CANT DO THIS TO ME SKJFHSKJDHFKSLDJFH 

icb u rly did the fairground first date i rly fucking hate u why did i even tell u these things i knew it was gonna fire back im fjjgjkknknnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn ur ‘tragic 😔’ when we become a goth couple :/ u dont understand goth love

why the fuck did u make him howl. i wanna fucking die rn. what the fuck. he fucking would. fuck off.

i dont wanna talk abt all that domestic shit how did u even write all of that without dying i literally wanna rip all my limbs off i wont make any comment. i didnt need to know what that would be like but u looooove ruining my life so :)

i rly hate u ksdjfhskdjhfksjh icb u did this thank u i wanna die??????????? wtf nat !!!!! no but rly thank u :( u took the time to write this long ass college au (is it????? whats cks major tho rly :/ ) and just skdfjsjk u remembered all the weird shit i told u thats cute and also Really Bad what else do u know that i forgot i told u skdfksjh im literally always screaming at u abt this shit how did u !!! remember all of this!!!!! dldskfjshljhlakjsh this is so cute and horrible nat wtf how could u :( now im gonna cry :(