#i lost my motivation for writing abt ethan centric things :(

[sweetnestor]

this is not a dream #9 | stop you’re scaring me

the real reason ethan was taken under the teamiplier wing | teamiplier/ego au

WARNINGS: suicide, murder, blood, self harm, drug abuse, alcoholism, sex addiction

read at your own risk.

previous.

Needless to say, Ethan had to pay for the damage. After Kathryn helped him clean up, he left behind whatever cash he could get ahold of and fled. He took his flight to Maine a little earlier than planned - that’s what he told the group chat, anyway.

The only thing is, he didn’t remember sending that message. He didn’t remember leaving, either.

To say that Ethan was shell shocked by his own actions was a bit of an understatement. He knew he had a knack for destruction every so often, but to break an entire couch with his bare hands? To cause damage through screams like El on Stranger Things? Hell, to fucking kill more innocent people?

Yes, over the last few months, Ethan found himself crying in some alley covered in blood because he took another life. He always called the team, and they helped him every time. Maybe that’s why he never left. He wouldn't know how to clean up his own mess and get away with it. He didn't even know how the team got away with it. To the public eye, these people were just YouTubers. Influencers. Idols. Good people.

That thought made Ethan's insides turn heavy. He was considered good people too. People online thought he was good people. Maybe some of those people were dead because of that thing, he would never know.

He was stronger than he thought, and he couldn’t control it. He was dangerous. He was bad. He should be on every kind of medication, or even locked up. He should be dead, but we all know how that ends up.

Was he going to turn himself in, though? Ethan sat in his car, parked in an abandoned lot on the outskirts of LA. He didn’t take anything with him when he left. He didn’t have any sort of getaway plan. He couldn’t even think. He didn’t remember getting into the car. This stupid thing did everything for him and landed him here. Didn't even get him very far.

Ethan just wanted to know why this was happening.

“I told you to stop this,” he spoke at last. He was sweating and shaking, breathing so hard that the windows fogged up. He couldn’t help but think of each time he saw one of his friends in this state. Did they feel as shaken up as he did in this moment?

Maybe he had to go back and talk to them. Ethan sat up in his seat and shook himself. He wiped away the tears and slapped his cheeks a few times, trying to get himself together again. He’d have to go back eventually, right?

He turned over the engine and took a deep breath. He had to face the music - the very loud, very disturbing music - eventually. Then, he adjusted the rearview mirror, only to discover a figure  in the backseat. Immediately, Ethan jumped and tumbled out of the vehicle, his heart pounding.

There was a shadow. It was already dark inside the car, but Ethan could make out a shadowy figure in the back. He backed away, terrified, but then he felt something knock him over. An invisible force pushed him on his chest and made him hit the back of his head on the pavement. He landed directly under one of the lamp posts, the light nearly blinding him. Ethan squinted, disoriented. The silhouette of a person stood over him. The outline was oddly familiar, but still terrifying.

Then he felt something hit his chest, making his sternum crack. Slowly, each of his ribs broke one by one. Ethan cried and whimpered, convulsing and cringing.

“Please…” he begged through a strained voice. “I-If you want to kill me… just do it… please. I want this to be over…”

The mumbling filled his ears, sending another wave of intense panic. Ethan tried to bring his hands to his ears, but any movement caused even more pain in his ribs. He started to yell.

“Stop this! Please! I just want this to be over! I'll do anything! Please just stop!”

And then Ethan sat up with a deep gasp. There was nothing standing over him. He didn’t have any pain in his chest or ribs. The only thing that hurt was the back of his head. His car was exactly where he had parked it. He looked around the parking lot, not another person in sight. It was all in his head. Why couldn’t have someone just decided to rob him instead? Why couldn't he have been murdered once and for all?

Cautiously, Ethan got to his feet and dusted himself off. He slowly stepped towards his car, checking the surroundings. He felt weary as he sat inside again. It was more than obvious that something was very, very wrong. He still felt like he being watched. He could still feel the figure in the backseat, even if he couldn’t see it. He already knew what it looked like anyway. He knew what those eyes looked like.

“Please…” he said helplessly as he placed his hands on the steering wheel. “Please… just stop…”

Whatever it was probably grinned wickedly. It's black eyes creased through the mirror. It made every hair on Ethan’s arms and back of his neck stand up.

His face suddenly fell, and his head went limp, hitting the steering wheel. His eyes closed, and when he opened them again, they were pitch black.

~

“I told you guys not to have the party here!” snapped an angry Mark.

He and the team had just arrived to the trashed office on Kathryn’s call. In hindsight, it had seemed like a good idea to show Ethan the truth about what he is. But instead, they ended up with a damaged workplace and a friend who had gone off the radar.

“At this point, it would be easier just to tell him,” Tyler said as he stepped inside the place, gazing at the pile of broken furniture, ruined birthday decorations, and wasted food scooped up under the broken window. He shook his head in disbelief.

“What, and have him think we’re insane?” Mark bitterly replied.

“He thinks he’s the crazy one,” Amy spoke after some silence. For once she wasn’t smoking or shooting up. “His thoughts are so loud, even I can catch them.”

“You sure it’s his thoughts that are causing that?” Her boyfriend’s tone suddenly changed. He grew concerned. “Maybe it’s… you know.”

Amy sighed. “Then we already know what’s gonna happen.” Then she started itching at the side of her neck, noticing her peeling skin. She pulled her hand back and saw her skin getting caked under her nails. Startled, she dug her fingers into her neck again and pulled. A piece of her flesh came off like some stretchy glue. “Shit…”

It wasn’t the first time the team had seen something like this, but it was never easy. Tyler looked away, Kathryn placed her hand over her mouth, and Mark… he just had a look of heartbreak on his face. He knew what this meant, and he never liked it.

“Are you even gonna come back this time?” he asked, a hint of resentment in his tone.

“I always do,” Amy replied, not sounding reassuring at all.

“Okay, so we have to stay put for you,” Kathryn said, diffusing the tension. “Which means we can’t go out and find Ethan.”

“He said he was flying to Maine tonight,” Tyler said. “So we won’t see him for a couple of weeks, right?”

“I checked his apartment,” Mark told him. “Well, I didn’t… but he didn’t take anything with him. He’s still in the city somewhere.”

Thinking about Ethan made him angry all over again. Mark paced around the room, running his hand over his face. He looked at the floor, at the pile of rubble. How could a guy of Ethan’s size do something like this?

“Fucking coward can’t even show his face…”

“Better here than somewhere he could get in legal trouble for,” Tyler pointed out. “We can’t stray too far out these walls, remember?”

“Now we don’t have any walls to stay within!” Mark’s voice echoed. “He’s destructive and out of control!” He cracked his neck. “How long will these fucking mortals keep us waiting?”

Kathryn immediately looked around the room. Any bottle of liquor that had been coveted was now destroyed. She turned towards her boss again, watching his eyes roll into the back of skull just before he collapsed to the floor. This was bad. She slipped out of the room before they could spot her.

As soon as Dark was out, Peevils and Stoneface appeared too. The room went black, and their auras shone bright. The air was tense, angry. Dark was flickering all over the place, making the lights spark and burst.

“I don’t feel good,” Peevils said, out of breath as she slid down to the floor. “I can’t be here for very long.”

“We need you right now,” Dark told her as he appeared standing in front of her. “You’re the most… compassionate of the three of us. When the time is right, you need to be the one to speak to Blank.”

She sighed as she leaned her head back against the wall. “But my mortal… look at her!” She ran her fingers through her hair, pulling out a shocking amount of strands. She scratched at her chest, practically peeling off pieces of skin and leaving red, inflamed flesh underneath. “She’s falling apart. I need to go and fix her.”

“Perhaps, it’s time to find another mortal?” Dark suggested. “This one is… wearing thin. It would be much easier to find a new mortal.”

Peevils looked up, glaring at him. “Mine is wearing thin? Yours is all but-”

“Another time!” Stoneface cut her off. “What about Blank? What about the human? She could help us.”

“The human?” Dark repeated with disgust. “She went to get her friends’ coping items. We know whose side she’s on.”

“So why haven’t we killed her yet?” Peevils wondered. “If she’s so bad, then why haven’t we gotten rid of her?”

Dark looked at her, a hard look on his grey face. “Why would you even ask that?”

The blonde shrugged, unfazed. Then she raised her eyebrows, detecting the first sign of vulnerability, and she read him for the first time. “Oh… I see.”

“What is it?” Stoneface asked.

“Don’t you dare,” Dark growled.

Peevils scoffed and ran her hand through the image, once again reminding herself that she couldn’t touch him. “And what will you do about it? You’re nothing but a hallucination.”

Just as she was about to stand again, she was pushed against the wall. She felt an intense pressure on her neck, and then she was slowly raised up into the air. Her eyes widened in fear as she choked and sputtered, spitting up human blood.

“Dark, stop!” Stoneface yelled, trying to counter the attack with his mind. He succeeded, relieving the pressure.

As soon as Peevils was dropped to the floor, hey greyish yellow aura went away. She kept coughing and gagging, pulling at her hair and neck. Heavier tufts of hair were falling out, and blood kept dripping from her mouth.

“If the mortal goes, then Peevils goes!” Stoneface yelled at Dark, who had appeared by the broken window. “Do you want that?”

Dark merely stood on the other side of the room, his hands behind his back.

“You’re... “ Amy coughed violently. “You’re… nothing… without us…”

And that’s when Kathryn burst through the door again, ready to bring her friends back.

______

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