#i miss you techno

[embers-archive]

These past couple hours I've been thinking about it all and fixating on the fact that ,,thats it. Thats all there is ever gonna be. No more "PHIL WATCH OUT"s or "bruuuh"s, no lockdowns of the dash cause omg yechno uploaded. That he was fucked over by the universe and wasn't given enough time ( twenty fucking three). And,,, those may be true but also- how fucking lucky are we? To have been able to witness these moments, to have been able to stumble across this wonderful, intelligent, charismatic and skillful man and for him to bring us so much joy and happiness and so many good memories and a wonderful community in his short time on earth. How fucking lucky are we. Cause yeah there may never be anymore of those moments, but we have a backlog of so many of them already ( thank you techno), have already been shaped by them ( bruh will forever be a part of my vocabulary istg it won't leave). And with that comes the acceptance that there is nothing you can do to change tge past. He's gone and unfortunately that can't be changed, we just have to treasure the moments we were given and keep his memory and legacy alive

[jaykensteinn]

I am.. beyond sad rn..

I've know since about an hour after technos dad uploaded the video but.. here's some words. I thought I'd share here too.

[ Gentle Reminders: if you feel affected by this loss please seek out a professional during these hard times. If you can't talk to a professional or even family, I am almost always available. It can be extremely difficult to deal with grief. Just bc you didn't know him personally doesn't mean your grief is invalid. Your mental health matters. Please don't lock up all your feelings or force them away. And lastly, I know it's difficult but, please be gentle with yourself, you deserve it. ]

CW: mentions of death

I almost never cried when it came to ppl I knew passing away. I remember having to force myself at my own grandma's funeral bc I felt bad that I wasn't crying. It took me like 5 years to let her death go and move on.

I feel wrong for not crying for family but breaking down for a man I never, personally, knew. It feels wrong to grieve someone who doesn't even know I ever existed. It feels wrong to grieve a man that everyone knew what he looked like but never remembered his face.

It feel wrong to grieve a man that I've never talked to. And here I am.. grieving, crying, having to force myself to get out of bed after remembering what I learned the night before. It may feel wrong or weird but it's not. It's really, really not.

Everyone grieves. One way or another, everyone grieves. People grieve celebrities, royalty, characters, pets, people on the news, memories, people they don't know. People grieve all the time. The only difference between me grieving techno and me grieving a family member Is that I didn't personally know him.

I looked forward to his content, seeing him in others content, hearing his voice, hearing his laugh, seeing fanart of him. I may not have seen a stream or vod in months or at all but that doesn't mean I didn't care or I didn't like him.

I just didn't have the energy or attention span or even plainly just didn't feel like it. I have never gotten a ccs merch. I have only gotten two ppls merch and they're both singers. One I don't listen to anymore and the other I listen to occasionally.

Techno meant a lot to me even if it didn't seem like it. He meant a lot to ppl even if they left the fandom. Techno has a legacy. His channel, his family, his fans, his friends. His legacy is everywhere. We're his legacy. His legacy and his memory will live on bc of us.

I will gladly have him be the first, and probably only, cc I get merch from. Although it's terrible timing but it's more so something to honor him and his memory than anything else. Even in death he's selling out but it's totally worth it.

it rly was a gg techno.. the game won't be the same without you tho. It was good while it lasted.

[time-is-standing]

dear Technoblade,

ít took me 57 days.

57 days only to not start sobbing whenever I see a video of you. not to tear up, when I hear your voice knowing it's not happening irl anymore. I'm glad we have videos of you, but it still hurts so fucking much to see it.

I haven't been able to go back and watch your streams and vids yet. I am having too many fucking emotions over it, so I decided I'd protect myself from the pain just for a while.

but tiktok doesn't work this way. I couldn't avoid you there and although it's still painful, I'm happy. I'm happy it didn't let me forget your voice. your laugh. your funny jokes. I'm happy you're here with me in spirit.

I'm getting a tattoo for you, so I'll literally never forget. I've already told some people about you but this way I'll speak so much more.

I miss you. I love you forever. take care.

[isjasz]

Remember, there is always a great big beautiful tomorrow.

[spiderziege]

once upon a time, there was a player

[royalarchivist]

Wilbur: Who's the lucky- who's the lucky lady, who's Missa, what's she like?

Phil: It's a dude. *laughs*

Wilbur: Phil, you didn't tell me you were bi, and also polyamorous.

Phil: Definitely not.

Wilbur: What does Kri- what does Kristin think of your- of your... husband?

Phil: SHE'S NOT CANON IN THIS UNIVERSE! And we- and it's not like that, it's not like that- it's uh, we're- it's platonic, we're just dude's hanging out protecting an egg-

Wilbur: Who's the top?

Phil:

[thatdeaddeerinyourbackyard]

Me: *crying and sobbing over techno, holding my techno plushie*

My brain: "My god I am so masculine, I am a man, damn I'm feeling the most like a man I've ever felt in my life, so this is what it's like to be 100% man."

[simplepotatofarmer]

on technoblade & grief

death, virtual grief, and your digital footprint // sherri turner - twitter // karis upton - grief painting 1 // shannon barry - tumblr tag // petfurniture - twitter // ursula k. le guin // dream - until i end up dead // youtube search function // van gogh - a field of yellow flowers // tristam & braken - frame of mind // the killers - enterlude exitlude // the haunting of hill house // @vpofcookies - techno art

"Grief that flows, that is felt in its fullness, is grief that will serve its purpose, and depart in its own time, helping us to know what we love, helping us to know we are human." - mr. technodad

[casart]

Blood for the Blood God🐷👑

One of Us

[terracottakore]

they're both #1 in my heart <3

[killjoyous]

sunkissed in June

I got Procreate today and made like FOUR FULL DRAWINGS GUH???,,,, it was a fast transition since I’m used to ibis paint on my iPhone lmao,, jumpscare btw for those who didn’t know I’m a finger artist.

On a more fitting note, last June felt so surreal to me because. It felt so surreal. His birthday will always kick off pride month for me. I think it’s fitting. June for me is a month of celebration.

[clingyduofan]

happy birthday king

[problemcore]

4/4

[respiteresponse]

🥕 ?

[royalarchivist]

Phil: Daedalus! Oh you - Oh it’s just reminded me of something, f**k. Ok Chat, quick heads up, it’s lore, it’s about lore. I was gonna have a line that I was gonna say, and I couldn’t say it because I was getting choked up when I went into Techno’s house. I was gonna talk about -- I was gonna mention very briefly about the code name that Techno gave me, “Zephyrus”, and how I initially wanted “ Daedalus” because I thought it was more appropriate. I was like “ Daedalus is probably --” like, I pitched Daedalus to him, and then he said, “No, I like Zephyrus.” [...] He was like, “Zephyrus suits you better.” So now you know, I was gonna say that, and then couldn’t. Amongst other things. It just reminded me, just seeing the name.

[raining-starshine]

I miss you already 🌹