#i promise you can find something else you'll like that doesn't actively harm people

[bookwyrminspiration]

Dear Quil, it's June. Lately, I've been wishing I would just die. I would never do anything to harm myself, but I just think things like, "I wish that cupboard would fall and crush me" My parents say I should see a therapist too. I don't think I need to, but I said okay. Do you think something's wrong with me, Quil? Am I depressed? Maybe it's the pressure from school or the stuff being going on at home, but I don't know. I just want to be happy again. But that's not going to happen soon is it?

Hey June, I think I know what you're talking about. Sounds like passive suicidal ideation, where you're not actively making any plans but are instead thinking about or wishing for your own death. You can read more about that here if you're curious, which is more of an informal source but provides a nice summary.

It's very common for people having those thoughts to not think they need treatment or help because they'd never act on them, but I do think there's cause for concern that could be aided through therapy. That doesn't mean that there's something wrong with you or you're messed up or anything along those lines. It's not a reflection of you as a person or evidence that you're worthless or bad or anything else your mind may try to convince you of. But it's not healthy and not wise to leave it unaddressed; you deserve better than to endure those thoughts and while you may not have any active desires now, passive ideation can lead to active ideation, so it's better to work on things sooner rather than later.

I can't determine whether or not you're depressed or whether it's situational or clinical, but I can say that I'm proud of you for agreeing to seeing a therapist even if you don't think you need to. I'll confess that I'm not a huge fan of going to therapy myself. The first time I went it was because my parents wanted me to when I was 13 or 14, and I didn't want to be there so I lied to my therapist so I wouldn't have to keep going. I don't recommend doing this, just trying to show I understand not thinking you need or would benefit from therapy. And when I started going to therapy again of my own decision, I still wasn't super hyped about it, but I went through with it to give it a valiant effort to see if I could gain anything from it. And I did.

So if you follow through and start going to therapy, part of it is going to depend on how open you are to the experience. On if you're willing to try things and look at things differently and acknowledge things about yourself. No one can make you do that. I'd suggest giving it a solid attempt, even if you decide it isn't helping or isn't for you afterward. If they suggest a coping strategy, genuinely try it. Participate and engage during the session, answer questions the best you can. Maybe you'll find out you didn't need therapy or that therapy isn't right for you (and that's okay!) or maybe you'll find it's beneficial. You won't know until you try. And lying to your therapist like I did doesn't help anyone

I can't tell you when you'll be happy again, but I can promise you that what you're feeling now won't last forever and that happiness in the future is possible, inevitable even. It sucks what you're going through and I'm so sorry. But it is temporary. There will be a time when things aren't as bad, and when you're not wishing cabinets would crush you, and when you can enjoy being you. I know it sounds impossible, but thoughts like these can make it really hard to be hopeful about the future and everything gets skewed, so I promise you this isn't permanent

Until you get there, because you will, one thing I like to do when everything is so dull and seems pointless is to search for little things that are slightly better than everything else, just to remind me that good things still exist when life is bad. My partner and I call it "three things," where we list three things from the day that made us smile or were more positive than the rest of the things that happened. It can be big things like "I got a new gaming console today!" or small things like "I finally found that sock I lost forever ago and now the pair is complete again." Just things to help you sort through all the muck and remind you that not everything is bad.

I don't know if any of this will help you, but if there's anything I can do please don't hesitate to ask. If you want to try the three things activity but don't want to do it alone, I can do it with you! It can be nice to share with someone else sometimes. Or if you just want to talk I'm here.

I hope whatever you decide to do from here works out for the best for you, and I'm cheering you on from across the internet <3

[nyxxhexx]

🎉 2021 Channeled Musical Messages for the Signs 🎉

Read for your Sun, Moon, Rising, and Venus 🌌

Overall Theme of 2021

Colors pt. II by Halsey

This is the follow-up to a year of heartache, heart break, disappointment, disillusionment, forgetfulness, and forgoing all that was meant to be ours. Now, we begin this new year on a hopeful note - we step into all that was meant to be and believe that it belongs to us. The colors begin to shift from monochrome to radiant, and light falls upon even the darkest of nights.

You are going to be okay.

Aries

We Are Sex Bob-Omb by Sex Bob-Omb

This year is irreverent. Declare who you are proudly and loudly, and don't let anyone forget it. Say what you need to say as it comes; don't let a single moment pass you by. Live for immediacy. Jump on chances when they come. You never know when you'll get another opportunity - last year proved that more than anything. You're ready for all that is coming, so be prepared to jump into the unknown. Find others who are willing to jump with you (or, at the very least, who are willing to wait for you at the bottom!) You will not walk through this year alone, even if you will it. Trust in the process, and accept that you are loved.

Taurus

Thnks fr th Mmrs by Fall Out Boy

It's time to let go of them. You know who. They aren't following you into this year, and holding on to them as more than they really are will only prove to be harmful. You have so much potential for love - stop pretending like you don't have feelings. Embrace newness; embrace change; embrace difference. Once you look back with clear eyes, you'll realize the memories are tinged with nostalgia and unrealistic expectations. Stop comparing others and view everyone with new eyes - they are each their own person, and not treating them as such will only lead to more heartbreak and disappointment. It's time to make the change, so make it. Jealousy will get you nowhere.

Gemini

Teddy Picker by Arctic Monkeys

It's not all it's cracked up to be. You have dreams and plans for this year, but you need to reevaluate what you think you want. Temper your expectations accordingly. The impossible can happen, and this year will be better - this isn't a message of discouragement, but a message of realistic expectations. Things don't just happen; they don't just change because the calendar shifts. You will get all you want, but you must actively put in the effort for it to ensure it's yours. Make sure you really want all you're pursuing. Don't waste your time on anything that's not worth your time and effort; throw yourself into everything else whole-heartedly. Just make sure it's not a distraction from something else. You deserve straightforward paths and clear conversation; never settle for any less. Make sure those around you know that, and this year will change for the better for certain. You already know the first step, so proceed boldly and with confidence in yourself.

Cancer

Forgiven, Not Forgotten by the Corrs

Do you really want to sit there and watch your days pass you by? You've been crying over this for so long; last year drew a lot of tears, but it's time for them to stop. You're still holding on; now it's time to let go. You need to tie up some of these loose ends before you can move into 2021. It's okay - the year's start can wait for you, but it won't wait long. Get up and start making moves towards forgiving yourself and forgetting others. You cannot accept all that this new year has for you until you make room by releasing the old one. You've been promised color and vibrancy - the blues and greys will fade over time, blossoming into reds, pinks, yellows, and brighter blues. You're ready to move on; all that's stopping you is yourself. Nobody is worth holding onto this way - especially no man. Let him go and accept the change for good. You're ready to move on once and for all. But just because you forget doesn't mean they will; if those old memories pop back up in your life, hold your ground and push them back out. You deserve better, so open yourself to it to receive it at last.

Leo

Goodbye Graceful by Falling In Reverse

You're leaving behind something good. Maybe that's okay, and maybe it isn't. If you really need to move on, move on gracefully and without malice. Burning this bridge isn't going to help you at all; you might need to cross it again in the future. Take all that you've learned in 2020 and apply it to the new year - if you forget all that happened, what was it all for? Yes, it was terrible, but there is something to be learned even from the worst events. Sometimes you just need to know that, no matter what happened, you survived. You lived through it all, and you will be okay again. Take time for yourself, but don't cut everyone off. You are loved by so many, so find the balance between the need for isolation and the need to surround yourself with others. Trust those who prove they can be trusted, and bow out gracefully from those who can't. Have faith that everything will work out - this year is a year for believing in the impossible, so believe. Trust in the bell curve; things are gradually going to get better until you finally find what you're looking for.

Virgo

I'm Legit by Nicki Minaj and Ciara

This year is about shaking up your routine. Step out of your comfort zone and embrace your inner Leo. You're the best of the best, you know that, now flaunt it. Brag on yourself like you're writing a resume. You deserve top shelf everything, so splurge. Treat yourself to what you want, even if it doesn't seem practical. Above all else, remember that you don't have to change yourself to do any of this. You don't need to change your appearance, your lifestyle, or your friend group - you just need to change your mindset. These two ideals might not seem to be compatible at first, but over time you'll realize how they fit together to better your life and make 2021 all it's meant to be.

Libra

My Propeller by Arctic Monkeys

The situation is urgent now, but don't rush it. You've been building towards something for the entirety of 2020, but it hasn't quite come to pass yet. Carry on towards it - the new year doesn't automatically shift things. You're very close to achieving that goal; the planets are synergizing, everything's falling into place. Make those last few moves. Say what you need to say, do what you need to do, and don't let time keep passing without setting things in stone. The time for waiting is over - the situation can't get started on its own. You have to set it into motion now, then keep the momentum going until you cross that finish line. Don't give up now; keep pushing for what you want and it'll come to you. Just be sure you do so with great purpose of movement and very, very carefully. Rushing things will only make them fall apart, but moving slowly and with purpose will make all the difference. Luck is on your side here; put it all into practice with faith, and you'll achieve your goals. The waiting between now and then is just a necessary evil, but it'll build your strength and stamina for the event itself. In the end, you'll be happy you didn't rush things, and everything will work out.

Scorpio

Perhaps Vampires Is A Bit Strong But... by Arctic Monkeys

In 2020, you let far too many people suck the life, love, and energy out of you. That will not go on any longer. You know what you deserve now, so stop denying yourself everything you know you're owed. There will be no more thinking about all you could have or should have done; there will be only doing. Cut off the people who drain you once and for all. Instead, surround yourself with people who give and take in equal measure. Don't retreat too far into yourself, though - your instinct may be to run completely and hide behind your walls, but those instincts are wrong. You've got to find a way to walk the line and achieve balance. If you don't, you'll fall too far to either side, and getting back to the middle will be difficult, but not impossible. Maintain your balancing act and ask for help, no matter sure you are you can do it all on your own. There are those in your life who are ready and willing. Just say the word and they'll be there.

Sagittarius

All I Need by Matchbox Twenty

You already know what you need this year. What are you waiting for? What's stopping you? If it isn't monumental, then it's already yours; if it is, then believe in the impossible. What you have right now isn't a permanent solution to filling the hole in your chest. You've been searching and searching for fulfillment. Now, it's time to claim it. Reach out and take that missing piece - and then start helping those around you find theirs. The dream isn't over for any of you, so don't give up, and don't let them give up either. It can be hard to trust our own instincts, so trust the messages meant for you. Trust the synchronicities and confirmations. This is just the first of many, so keep an eye out; you're already being guided in the right direction.

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

https://seaworldentertainment.com/blog/coronavirus

72 hour window, sea world you can do better.

Anxiety and stress cause people to introvert and a single email or especially a phone call can be impossible.

Mental health awareness should enable you to change that policy.

Plus just the panic some arise to the occasion - others shut down

I do both. In my personal life... I don't like canceling on others. And so sometimes I just don't show up without a call. Just blow it off.

I have severe issues at times where hiding is the best feeling for me to use to survive...

I recommend that all places that charge people to go to give automatic refunds or allow travel rearrangement for up to 5 years in the future but at least 3 years to reschedule.

Having only a short window of the rest of 2020 -- well i can tell you it's highly likely people will not be doing shit on their own for the rest of the year as far as having the freedom to make plans of where and when they will go

And if they do Then you have people from March to October that need to fulfill their travel obligations plus you have the humans that want to go as well.

So, you will actually overfill your facilities and you will cause a problem on quality you can provide and have over crowding which dimishes the quality of your services and the ability of guests to enjoy the experiences and hospitality you provide.

Thus then making people not want to make plans for the following year to your business...

So i recommend at least a 3 year window to reschedule. Maximum of 5.

This allows the promise you'll have guests willing to go for the next 5 years meaning that people will go And pay like at sea world pay extra for food and gift shop items. Thus providing an income.

Some places will feel the need to financially close. Like here we have a small amusement park in Albuquerque called Cliff's... Im sure they would be fine and not close because of the tight knit community and school field trips and etc. But if they had to there would be an ability to sell so the community can still enjoy. So ...

Places should seek the ability to sell to keep the community activities available. Or at minimum give a refund and also highly advertise as much as possible Your permanent end date so people can cram in and get their dollar worth

It seems that our time on the ocean will not exceed past 2020 and so in 2021 the world will be free.

And yet we cannot promise that. I won't. Because I don't know what will happen exactly for sure for sure. Until it's done.

So i feel comfortable saying everyone will be locked down for the remainder of 2020.

Will we be? We are working as diligently as possible. I am working with amnesia and so governments have a 3 year lock down achievement plan. Across the globe. The last two years remaining of the plan are intended to be free with extra caution.

We have many things at stake. Primarily abductions and alien issues. As well as diseases which aren't a primary concern because they are created then altered in a way most people are safe. Its an inner soul that can heal. Changes in the minds and soul. Medical care is for comfort only But can not heal.

Injuries on the other hand must require hospital care and we will work to get healers in as much as possible. Otherwise traditional stitches and surgery for now.

Just don't take it too harsh when a patient dies. Just do the best you can. Know you did the best and somethings are simply out of your control.

If you did the best you could don't second guess. Ask a tree If there is a better solution. But don't torture and beat yourself up about it. Just keep adding and retaining information to help you assist in the future.

I say that as for doctors but that goes for all our Humans, New and Old.

What we hope for is a repeat time of last year where its the end of October we begin release just like we did for the human traffic victims.

So if youre wondering and you need a time placement look to last year and say "this year we will spend like human traffic victims did And we will be let free the same time Sabrina found them last year. So the end of the year holidays"

Personally like Alex I don't like the lock down modes and you can tell by the way i have responded to that.

However i do deem it is necessary for human safety and will only work if it is adhered to the strictest of rules.

Not for the spread of Viruses as i have represented is not a concern to me -- But to prevent human trafficking. And to help people get off illegal drugs.

This last week 1.489 million people were kidnapped for the sole reason of human trafficking in factories. This does not include the 7.86million from planet Xion.

With 84 trillion people in the world it is a small percentage.

However it is still too many. 1 is too many. 3 people is excessive.

Rapes have gone down by 84% since DNA4U surfaced to availability. With Quarentine they have gone up by 2% because people are not using the required recommended Friends list.

Family list is genetic. It doesn't mean you can trust them it just means they share your blood line.

You must refer to the Friends list. It is searchable and filterable. So you can find a family blood line member you can trust to babysit that will not harm your child.

So you need to help us help you by standing your foot down. Call the police if you have to And say "Some one is attempting to repeatedly have access to me and/or my family and they are on my enemy list"

This will make you a priority. And you must show proof of this so the police know how to handle the situation as there sre guidelines. They can type in their computer the codes and cross data and have about 3 different solutions. Of course they will need to "target" "satellite roam" "alert zone" and see if there is stalking going on and what else all this person is doing for the entire time of Quarentine. A list will then appear of what is considered good and bad.

7 times the first week of Quarentine to stores -- pass

7 times in the 3rd week of Quarentine to shop -- fail

8 times to enemy only after researching DNA4U -- inquire -- then it states from the looks of it -- did they go around looking in Windows? Did they go knock? So it is dependent on the quality of the people involved. They are coded by color and letter.

So basically a person of lower quality looking in Windows will state -- inquire -- FAIL FAIL

A highest quality will state -- inquire -- PASS PASS.

Highest human quality will state ------ PASS

Then there's Pass which is an alert the person is an a state of depression. Meaning white gloves. Extra care.

pass means action will occur in the upcoming months or has already. No punishment.

pass/fail means you've done shit that you shouldn't had. But we will let it go.

Then you will get s police report of Tree Quality sent to your DNA4U.

The police will also get one to the satellite map system. SMS. Which they then transfer with their comments to their local police reporting system. If they choose.

So call and report,tresspassors and other things

We called yesterday for Alex and he didn't want to. But i wasnt there. His security is to guard. He ran in the house and they fired warning shots and went in. Thus stating inside the home Chris McGayHay would be killed because that was the claimant territory. And also it auto covers any place where there is lung/gill breathing life.

So had Chris went to where the animals were even am aquarium since he had already physically attacked, he would have been shot and killed immediately.

Instead i handled his sick brain and kept him on the ground by using my experiences. Until police arrived.

I've promised him for the last 20 years i would make sure he got my revenge on his lies and forceful actions upon me and others. Since he was a "child" of 8 years old. Sometimes pure evil is obvious.

He's had time to change and if he had gotten bygones would be bygones. But like other evil he's continued.

So i never told him the police were coming.

And a sideline to "drug dealers" i promised if you used my system you would not be arrested.

I did not promise users anything except they would get their drugs and changes would occur to weight and quantity that is not the dealers concern.

So I in essence protected the drug dealers but trre does over see.

I am head of the CIA and so they do work for me, i do allow them extra pay that would otherwise go to the CIA. "Taxes" so they are paid by the CIA. I got a very tight system.

They would be laid off/fired. Which means when told to quit because theyre stupid they have to quit and then tree handles and it could include arrest if they continue to sell large amounts or to more than 20 people a few grams.

That is people whom were paid by the CIA to handle transactions of illegal drugs. Only.

So 5 people were laid off and tree had in depth discussion in person and so 2 were reihired. 3 were killed. Worldwide.

Now if someone i just explained did what Chris did they would been killed instantly due to the responsibility they hold to be an upright citizen. They would not have been arrested.

Now if Alex was a delivery personnel and Chris was a pick up and you like Alex punched him 9 times in the face and fucked him up. You would get an apology and the customer would been killed and/or arrested. Also you would get free medical care.

Now the concern was I turned him in for the quantity of drugs he had on him. He worked (no longer so mechanics find another team because Chris WILL DIE that is a fact and a promise) for NHRA. ALL NHRA employees were Ordered to get their drug issues under control. Per NHRA WRITTEN and DISTRIBUTED guidelines he was 79% over the limit. So he had almost double what he was allowed to OWN. And he is only allowed to carry one day worth on his person. Unless he just did a pick up.

So it was up to 7 ounces he could carry in the beginning. Now it is 3.4 ounces hes allowed to carry. Any NHRA employee that was employed in February 2020 or hired since then.

It lowers every week. They have to check the schedule.

That said. Any drug user with 2x more Than what the NHRA is allowed and is involved in a violent crime upon an innocent person will be charged with drug trafficking. This includes kidnapping. Domestic violence. Theft.

The minimum level for a random user with out an employee guidelines will be set at 1 ounce as max. On the person.

So that is set for criminal misconduct and that amount is set for the 4th of July.

Everyone in the world is in rehab.

In one way or another. I'm in rehab for my amnesia. Mine is on tv and in social media i can find photo. Ysll help. Its a long explaination ... But y'all help because I watch on Netflix what you do. I watch Top 10 and i watch trending and i watch new releases and recommendations. Like kinda turning on the radio... Just what's on easy access

So this way i found the series "you" which shows Alex in a non forgiving light. The different girls are all me. Basically in simple terms its called "shape shifting" the reason is for our safety... Some for his sanity... Some obviously I made mistakes... Like not realizing the emotional problem associated with

Now there is with Beck some crazy shit. Now what it was was we were being watched with all kinds of spy equipment. So we were like when i was locked in th box -- it was acting... Emotionally we released but used non identifying words to express our True emotions. So basically we were saying What the spies wanted to hear. And doing what they wanted or what we needed to do to survive.

Having to,fight the Zulululu who does mind games included

So the series "you" can be enjoyed the way it is seen or it could be understood with truth. So y'all trended it and i found it.

It was filmed,in,the 1920s 1980s 1960s all,sorts. But we always magic in technology

This is why. Because we are ass holes.

We tricked them to think there was time traveling. Which is not even possible.

We did a lot of torture.

But you see Alex always picking up little kids to save... He can't help it. Poco was an illegal alien. But Alex did all he could to make his life more comfortable and happier and safer. He loved Poco, i loved Poco. We still do. So we didn't treat Any one less than human.

But we did send in electronic devices we would use in the future that were unreleased to the public and did it via magic. And we lied about years. To trick.

We did base it on reality of the time table we set to release the electronics in the future.

So it wasn't a back to the future deal. It was allowing people to use the technology we had available but had not released.

So I am in rehab for my memories and my abilities. Changing skins... Stuff like that...,

Things i have forgotten.

Trees remember but they filmed these via their tools and so i use them so they can be busy for the future and current life.

They are helpers. Some are servants but they are not slaves. And they have human feelings.

So I sometimes need to be reminded to ask them for help. Because i can't do everything on my own.

So im getting tired. Tr33 updated you on Alex. I'll be with him and try to make his day okay

I'll be watching the tv and generally resting.

So thanks for being interested in our lives and have our real life "reality" t.v. up trending and easily for me to find.

"You" is just what i needed for Alex and i's relationship. I love him.

He wants to say what happened yesterday. And so i had sent him stuff in insta then he shared in his group NHRA chat cause it was funny and informative and he said to humans to do something in particular because it will harm them.

So alien tubes that can't handle all the attention not on them got dumb.

And Chris McGayHay went at him in group saying he was disrespectful to non-humans (aka rapists) and so Alex explained what i meant that "sexual gratification isn't expected from tools such as vibrators and shit like that but from real life human experience,such as pain and suffering being relieved by sexual intercourse and the length and intensity of a sexual orgasm is,dependent upon the emotional level of both people. If one is upset just even about the world issues, sexual impulses from the brain will create more intense and sexually gratifying orgasms which is why she said for me not to get one"

And then Chris McGayHay went after Alex all crazy saying "she said not to have sex with her and I'm gonna kick your ass for lying" and some other vulgarities based upon his interactions with me. Because I don't fuck the world. I'm celebiete except with my soulmate in a metaphysical connection.

So Alex said in response "i Wouldn't want to fight me if i were you because she actually hates you and wishes you were dead. And is thus I would beat you to the living daylights were gone only for you to live the next 3 days with your lungs drowning in blood to make you think you have the Corona Virus impeded with COVID-19 and she would have you laying in my yard in some random corner after ghosting spirit and half animal crazed dragging you to where vultures will eat you. But if you wanna bring it on. You know,the rules and you must pay up front now according to the new rules format with the NHRA. Which I don't like but it stems from the Queen's ruling and how she set it up in 1994 in the Original Fight Club. So do what you want as Sabrina says but i guarantee you, you come here to fight me or her or for her when she can fight on her own you will leave here dead or wishing you were."

He has 7 hours left. If the jail sends him to the hospital to repair his internal injuries, he will die in surgery. Doctors and hospital personnel have enough on their plates to not deal with this mess is a blessing.

He does have his phone to call his loved ones to say goodbye, bitch on the internet about me and everyone else. Look at porno. Whatever he wants. But in 7 hours he will die for what he did yesterday and in hid life. Hurting others when ever he could.

So then back to the issue of yesterday. What I then sent Alex totally Contradicted what Chris said. So then I posted it when Alex and I heard Chris saying maybe that wasn't my Insta account although I posted a screen shot last month with that exact account covered over with marker. They could compared the length. I posted a full detailed story which is why I would have that account.

So my text is in Black with pink tinted. I proved I use An old site and tree proves "magic" crosses over my posts to be a certain way via my log on and ip address and my DNA. NO ONE can post in my colors. No one can post in Alex's nor Tree.

Its like going pee. It only comes out one Way. You can't refill your bladder through your pee hole. Tubers have tried this. 89% of them world wide. 100% in the USA. it's impossible

There were classes on it.

So I coded post 2x

And still he went to beat up Alex or just plain commit suicide.

So Tree has a rather lively action adventure movie to share in schools around the world. Don't worry outs specialized. He's the Tree of Knowledge.

He will use it for doctors and lawyers, people wishing to be and those just curious. By the time it's released With full editing it will be "Old World History"

He'll have 21 different videos in regards to the event. Going back 20 years when I gave him the name McGayHeyHey.

So y'all be good. If you need hospital care and you have no insurance, go to an URGENT CARE or Emergency Room and you will be automatically put on my insurance. You'll need a $3 fee to enroll. Your visit that day will cost $1. Total of $4 at the clinic then $1 for all prescription you can pay at the pharmacy or clinc.

I know y'all got $5 on me, too.