#i should concentrate on other things

[tardis--dreams]

Okay but this morning a bunch of people were sneezing nonstop and coughing their lungs out in class (one of them was sitting next to me) and none of them wore a mask. Needless to say, i was a bit. Annoyed. Flashforward to today's afternoon class. Only I and one other girl are wearing a mask. The professor talks about communication and how everything we do communicates something. "For example.. when someone is wearing a mask it usually means they have a cold. They don't tell you directly 'hey i have a cold' but the mask communicates it" BITCH I'M NOT THE ONE WHO HAS A COLD. BUT YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT, IF I DID I SURE WOULD WEAR A MASK

[mewtwo24]

I finally finished reading the fourth volume of svsss in full, and thing is--the first time through I only read the bingqiu content because I was ravenous for more of their happy ending.

Turns out that was a perilous mistake.

Because I started reading the airplane extras. And I swear to god. MXTX is trying to kill me

What do you MEAN demon lord Binghe was sitting on his big fucking throne. All stoic and forbidding. Surrounded by his demon generals who don't know shit about human courtship. Asking them what he should do, fully demoralized by constant rejections from sqq, only to have airplane tell him to act more pathetic and needy. Which is already hysterically funny and insane, UNTIL LBH'S RESPONSE IS THIS, KILLING ME INSTANTLY:

LUO BINGHE. WHY DOES HE SAY IT LIKE: "I already tried that, didn't work--nothing works :/ not mean, not maidenly, not housewife, not spicy, not capable disciple. Is doubling down on clingy really all it will take? What's a born hater with only one love in his life to do????"

The dichotomy of him sitting there like 'how can I reach the unfathomable depths of shizun's heart?' A HEART HE'S ALREADY WON OVER, MIND and then in the Holy Mausoleum solving the puzzle without blinking and being like 'oh yeah you just have to hit the acupoints, no sweat.' Literally the comedy writes itself I'm so--

How am I supposed to be normal about this. MXTX understands the juicy quintessential queer joy of a person with the world's power at their fingertips wishing only for love. Willing to do anything to earn that love, when unbeknownst to them it's already been freely given. Totally not screaming and yelling and clawing at the walls

And that's not even touching airplane's uproarious account of events. The way he's like 'lol what's next, lbh and sqq are best friends now? smfh' only to see lbh TACKLE SQQ LOVINGLY. FOR SQQ TO BE BASHFUL ABOUT IT BUT SO SO FOND OF THE LITTLE SCAMP. This when we've been experiencing sqq's constant inner monologue of 'I'm so cool and so dignified about my role, truly the epitome of propriety and poser-level fortitude.' Meanwhile, in their universe:

Airplane constantly flaming???? Sqq and lbh in his observations????? His absolute bewilderment and confusion????? Legendary. No notes every single second of this shit was hilarious.

Airplane's comment that sqq + older adolescent lbh traveling together was just watching a couple in their honeymoon phase. OR the fact that lbh is exceedingly petty and refuses to share their food in the wake of airplane's interruption of their time together, until sqq relents sheepishly and insists airplane eat what's left (ONLY AFTER PLACATING LBH WITH MORE FOOD FROM HIS PLATE, SOBBING)

Watching airplane salivate over Mobei-Jun and acting like that's totally normal behavior. Finding out mbj and airplane got together first. Finding out sqq encouraged airplane. LIKE THIS. WHILE HE IS STILL IN DENIAL ABOUT HIS OWN FEELINGS:

Mobei-jun clearly thinking their arrangement is a forever thing, heartbroken his human abandoned him with all the hapless fury of a scorned wife swept away by false promises of fidelity. Airplane writing demons to be the type to beat up their crush lovingly and still unable to connect the dots about mbj's feelings. Mbj letting him go and respecting his wishes, only relenting when there's indication airplane was poorly processing his own feelings and didn't actually want to leave. Mbj caring for him and listening to him as soon as airplane voices what he needs directly and with clarity. None of these gays are functional and it's everything to me

Unrelated, but I physically can't hold this information in anymore:

I'm still reeling from younger lbh having his sexual awakening from the image of sqq wrapped in the immortal binding cables. Condemn me as you like he was so, so real for that.

And no I will not be taking any comments about how luo bingge couldn't bear to see luo binghe cherished in ways he never got to have and all the haunting implications of that. I will also not be taking any comments about luo binghe's instinct to look for sqq in that alternate universe, only to be shaken to the very core to be unable to find his shizun anywhere. The unspeakable and latent horror of his relentless mind likely piecing together what happened, but unable to say it; to suspect what is true, and live with the harrowing confusion of his double's actions. To blame himself, to assume that he had let his anger get the better of him in that world and result in unspeakable folly...

I also refuse to talk about how heartrending it is to hear Tianlang-jun weakly say "In the end, I really can't bring myself to hate humans." The implication that the foolishness of that hope and bright-eyed fondness--the very thing that put him through such unspeakable agony--couldn't be beaten out of him entirely. To discover that his faith in Su Xiyan hadn't been misplaced, to the contrary: his beloved hadn't scorned him at all, but rather fought to the miserable end to protect the fruition of their genuine feelings of love when she couldn't protect tlj or herself.

How MXTX has sqq deliberately draw parallels between their situation and that of ygy+sj and tlj+sx; desperately wishing it might not be too late for them. The concept of breaking cycles of abuse and harm pervasive throughout the newly devised story, how it evolves for the better only when love takes the place of power, pride, and domination. How the moment sqq chooses vulnerability instead of saving face, the genre shifts to the so-called "cringe" girly genre where most if not every character is more fulfilled, more true to themselves. How the "male-oriented" former genre was aimlessly sensationalized and sexualized, how it was a sustained performance of aspirational toxic masculinity. How men objectify other men without end. All of the unspoken gendered implications that come with that.

Anyways. Going to go put my head in a sandbox and try to process everything I just witnessed because even a second reading is not enough to find a modicum of closure.

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

Me, while manically cleaning my room at 3:27am: I should make several large, life-changing, irreversible decisions.

[teruel-a-witch]

as i'm waiting for my new tablet to arrive i'm reminded why i don't shop online ever and hate paying in advance for something i haven't been able to hold in my hands yet.

it's starting to seem like it won't arrive before my birthday tomorrow so i am officially livid. i specifically picked a store that wasn't far away and promised delivery on the 28 at the earliest but it looked like they only shipped it on the 28th judging by the status 😒 the one time I order a gadget online instead of going directly to a store and this happens. birthday officially ruined.

[a-a-a-anon]

as a north american who's a huge britcom fan it's so interesting to me that it feels like every other british comedian originally came from a double act (which seems much less popular here)

[watermelinoe]

i think totk improved on botw in a lot of ways but i also still had the same issues w it that i did w botw and it had new issues as well (the inventory was a nightmare, armor upgrade reqs were ridiculous, too many collectible-based quests esp the fucking hudson signs)

but my biggest complaint was that even with a storyline that i personally found more interesting, there is just zero connection to it at all. botw and totk feel like revenge for skyward sword being so emotional, linear, and story-driven (iirc miyamoto was not happy with its direction and he and aonuma (?) were just undoing each other's work which is partly why the game suffers from repetition)

so now we get zero emotional attachment to anything that's going on except in cutscenes that aren't even required and have no visible impact on link in any way. hardly any of the sidequests feel meaningful, and the ones that could have been always seemed to fall short. the npcs seem weirdly chipper about the gloom spreading, the ground splitting open, and the earth levitating into the sky. many of them that should remember you just... don't, for some reason, like there's so little development in any of link's relationships with any of these people, zelda included, as if he hasn't even existed for the past eight years between games, like what was with the hateno village retconning

my personal favorite quests were awakening the fairy fountains (felt like classic zelda and i liked that it made a permanent impact on the world, even rewarding you with a permanent new rendition of epona's song at every stable), giving all the bubbul gems to koltin (you have to go out of your way to talk to his brother kilton to get the full kinda bittersweet ending and it's a rare touching moment imo), and the balloon thing with rhondson and hudson's daughter (i liked that it actually expanded on a questline from botw and it was also bittersweet), also i liked penn and the newspaper questline

the biggest improvement imo was the shrines, the puzzles were so much more interesting with so many possible solutions, and the temples/bosses were so much better than the divine beasts and stupid scourges

but idk i just... feel like i wanted more from it. to me the story is just as important as the gameplay and tbh in both games link feels so detached from the plot, like it's just happening around him, not to him. and you can argue that in the older games they didn't explore his emotional state or w/e but the narratives were tight enough that you felt immersed anyway, and could project your own feelings onto him. these games actively thwart your attempts to humanize the silent protagonist bc he's more emotional about fucking cooking than about being manipulated by a creepy puppet of the woman he's been with for 8+ years at this point (should've made puppet zelda a boss again smh) or seeing memories of people dying horribly

all of which is too far spaced out between, idk, grinding for lionel parts

with the world as big as it is, nothing in it is allowed to be too big and i'm concerned that this is just what zelda games are going to be like from now on. i hope the next project announced will be something completely different.

[wellnoe]

xavier’s shouldn’t be a big school bc i hate it

[volivolition]

[guy with chronic pain voice] i should draw pain threshold

[sudokuplayer]

i'm so angry and heartbroken and i think this is all i will ever be

[minglana]

sorry still thinking about my dad. how do you get arrested by the fascist police for being a communist and then turn around and 40 years later believe in the divine rights of kings and thinking that it was good that "the reds" lost the war in 1939 and thank god for franco bc those were good times. like. what?

[tardis--dreams]

Embarrassing being an adult and crying over not understanding your homework. I'm 28 years old. This is so fucking stupid

[coffee-bat]

pov you fixed a problem in excel without anyone's (or google's) help [you're absolutely horrible at computers]

[himalayaan-flowers]

.

[devilfruitdyke]

interacting with my mom when shes drunk is like being stabbed to death with a paperclip

[tibli]

although im usually someone who votes democrat even if i hate the candidate bc theyre usually at least marginally closer to my ideals, i really dont think there's a 'lesser of two evils' option if we have to pick b/w biden and trump. i tried to believe that idea the first time they went against each other, but that was before biden saw fit to actively enable genocide and bomb one of the countries that stood up against it. they are both deplorable, reprehensible people and for once in my life im going to look into independent candidates

[thyme-in-a-bubble]

lea the new moodboards / headers for daisy are so so cute <3

— ivy

thank youuu!! they aren’t exactly new new, still pretty much the same, just broke them out of the cage they were in before, made them individual photos instead of one big one, to make them prettier in more modes (dark, light, whatever your preference is). it is taking me a long time (so many hours of editing the individual photos omg), but i’m so close to being done updating them all. planning on taking care of the last bit tomorrow (pretty sure only my series chamomile is left, but i’ll do another sweep though just to check)

(found a link to the thing i’m referencing in the tags)