#i will barely post now due to this
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hey dude, i know you mean well for the ol community, and i think you're really cool and have been following you for a while, but i really don't think all this shitting on rose is justified. spreading callout posts by taking shitty things people have said out of context, especially queer poc, is a real tactic used by terfs to spread discourse and isolate queer people from communities, and it's worked so well that queer people have started doing the same to their own with really good intentions, but the overall effect is nonsense discourse and the spread of hatred. kab herself has publicly said that she and rose have a good relationship and that she thinks most of rose's impact on the games and community has been really helpful for checking her own biases. the screenshots and shitty things you've read about her are not the full story, and yes, i do agree that rose handled certain things really really shittily and i am not excusing that at all, but rose isn't a bad person at all, what the callouts show is out of context and does not show rose accurately as a person, and the degree of hatred for a group of people honestly trying to create a safe space for queer people is wildly disproportional. i really hope this doesn't come off as any way accusatory, because it really isn't, and i really look up to you as a creator. i just want you to be aware that this is something that has been settled by the people involved, and continuing discourse and wanting rose fired goes directly against kab's own wishes and is based on misinformation. thanks for reading this far. please have a wonderful day
I respect you and I appreciate that you reached out respectfully with this.
I do not repost these call out post to be malicious or start a hate campaign like some people have been accusing others of.
I do not encourage witch-hunting or harassment of Rose or Kab ; As they are people and make mistakes , even if the mistakes are extremely shitty and I understand that those screenshots were a private conversation but frankly , I think some of the stuff Rose said was extremely odd and vulgar , context or without.
I am not in the official OL server so maybe your right about them not being as bad but even if that was the case they should still be let go of the role as sensitivity reader because they’re views aren’t open minded and its ironic that they are supposed to help prevent bias and keep the game inclusive when they’ve shown a weird rhetoric and the paper bag comment actually made my jaw drop.
OL has been one of the most comforting things to me , I was in a really dark place when I started a new save file and fell in love with all the characters and the game so believe me when I tell you I would never want to attack the very person who created and brought me that comfort. It physically exhausted me and upset me yesterday when it all came to light , considering it has been a huge hyperfixation and boosted my self esteem.
I don’t care if GB is okay with their friends talking an insane amount of crap behind their backs. It's not my business, I just think that they need better friends.
Even with this in mind, I can’t continue my support for Kab if they decide to keep Rose on the development team, not purely just because of what they said in private but how they treated my friend. The both of them are insinuating that they’re a “liar” or that they “overreacted” when they just wanted to express a grievance. And a surprisingly large number of people are harassing them and accusing them of starting a “racist campaign” towards Rose when they are a trans minority as well. If the fandom is so quick to villainize my friend for simply speaking out then frankly I don’t want to be a part of this fandom.
I hope you also have a good day.
#orion4ever#orion discussion#orion thought#our life beginnings & always#our life now and forever#i will barely post now due to this#if you don’t agree with my view then I hope you have a good life and goodbye#and if you do agree and choose to stay then know I recheck my notifications constantly and smile when I see a like from a familiar person!#i am moving on#this will be the last i talk about this unless something changes#i am disappointed in some of the fandom but i know some people will have more trouble letting go of the game#so i won’t hold it against them#while i joke alot#i want to stay cordial
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MIRU!!🥳🥳 I am very amazed and inspired by the fact that you have been in the fandom for such a long time and have drawn wonderful art. Your skill has improved in 12 years, which is commendable. I adore your style, right to the point of shaking. Because it is insanely tasty and very pleasant to the eye. Coloring is a separate topic in general, how fucking awesome it is. You are the only person in this fandom who can be admired for his drawing style and content delivery! Happy birthday to you!💕
Thank you for the birthday wishes and the very big and kind words!! 🧡 However, please don't say things like "you are the only one in the fandom who can be admired...", as it really hurts me to read and it's also objectively incorrect! There are so many creative and skilled people in this fandom who deserve admiring if you have the eyes to see, and my art would be nothing if not for other artists inspiring me the past 12 years. I also don't consider my art as "content"; i dont make money from my art and everything I draw is very personal to me! Thank you! 🙏
#others are also posting much more than i am now haha ive barely drawn anything the past two years due to low energy 😭#ill end the year with another photoset though#mirubday#miruask#rawmeatttt
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vriska + a transmasc dave doodle


#tryna get into colored pencils again we'll see how it goes#its been a while since ive done a good tag ramble#but like i dont hv anything to ramble about#my art#traditional art#doodles#fanart#homestuck#homestuck fanart#dave strider#dave strider fanart#vriska serket#vriska fanart#oh actually i do hv smth to ramble about today#that being scheduled posts#yknow scheduled posts are actually really convinient and helped me quite a bit#like i used them for a couple months and honestly really liked useing them cuz it allowed me to hv a pretty consistent posting schedule#but in the end i just didnt feel right with it mostly due to the fact that even with it set to post three times a week it felt weird to hav#some of my drawings posting weeks after i finished them. like they were old news to me already but they were barely being released to every#one else it just felt weird for me ig. not to mention that like on the rare occassions that i didnt have anything to post i felt obliged to#draw smth just so i would have smth to post and most of the time that led to me being unhappy with my art. so now ive just decided like fuc#it imma post whenever i want and honestly im really happy with that even if i might be going a little trigger happy with the posting button#recently lmao. ive just been drawing a whole lot and hv so much to post its insane. hell i still hv things in my gallery that i needa post#but ill save those for the next couple of days lol but yeah thanks for coming to my very long ted talk/ramble and goodnight 😴#damn im such a yapster what the hell
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Hatice and Ibrahim have never been more divided from each other up to that point than in E43-E44. While Hatice always sensed when Ibrahim was actually in danger or she's lost him in any way (i.e. E35 when she felt something in Edirne while Ibrahim was with Nigar), nothing came up when he was shot; he didn't even tell her what happened to him until she found out herself; they were seperated while he was recovering; the wait for Ibrahim to come back felt like an eternity to Hatice and she went through several breakdowns at once (and his carriage was right in front of her but she couldn't see him, her only thought until the very end was that he was dead, isn't that what her dream with the "crying" statues meant?); when he came back she wasn't allowed to spend at least some time alone with him as SS wanted to talk to him; even their sleep was interrupted. The only thing that Ibrahim asked Hatice to do was to play him his mother's song on the violin (I like to think that Hatice started learning the violin in order to become closer to him, to who he is, to his past again after what they went through with little Mehmet).... but he no longer associates even that with Hatice anymore.
#not even gonna mention Ibrahim being gone while Hatice was giving birth in the end of E44#as that is the culmination of all the separations that accumulated throughout E43 and 44#and I already pondered a little on what it meant in my “Ibratice and the losses of a child” meta#oh funny story this was supposed to be a post about Hatice saying they're bringing Ibrahim's corpse when the carriage appeared#as that is likeeeee oh my godddd the *FORESHADOWING*; she was even shrouded in green again too!!!! (lighter green but still!!!!)#but then I saw that this was just the Bulgarian dub again and the English subtitles translate it as something else entirely#which didn't seem like what Hatice actually said either but since I can't make out some of the OG words at all and there aren't#English subtitles under the Turkish videos of E44 I decided not to risk it#anyway goodness how much did Yakup's prophecy terrify Hatice#she really can't see anything *but* death at this point and how *won't* she when all her feelings always turn out to be correct?#(except the statues of course but due to the rest of the bad events they can't do anything *other* than feed Hatice's fear)#this is why Hatice fearing so much about Ibrahim's life isn't merely a matter of obsession but I digress#thing is Ibrahim was *actually* ready to *die* for once wanting his mother to *take him* in that dream#(parallel to Hürrem's E01 dream of course)#as he's lost the rest of his past (that's in the present) already; he's really been defeated hasn't he?#the only person left is his mother he barely finds as he's already lost her long ago both metaphorically and literally#but he finds her and he symbolically finds her in Nigar; this is what “home” means to him now and his look at Nigar after he woke up#is what made him realize it; Hatice is too far behind; close yet so out of reach while Nigar only seems closer and closer#so he goes after her to chase that “home” he got lost in but “home” isn't what he once knew anymore#(Nigar's tear falling on Ibrahim's cheek *is* an artistic device signifying love tbf)#magnificent century#muhteşem yüzyıl#muhtesem yuzyil#hatice sultan#ibrahim pasha#ibratice#hatibo#(also in the tags)#nigar kalfa
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evri is the worst piece of trash in the world like wdym they never showed up here, told the place i ordered from that it got delivered, send as 'proof' a picture of the parcel in their van and then initiated a return on my behalf 👍👍👍 they should burn in hell
now I have to call the place i ordered from because evri fucked up ... like why can shit not just work im too sick to deal with this shit
#lesson learned is to never order anything after christmas/nye because i also have to return 4 amazon parcels now :)#like theyre busy I GET IT but delivering products in the correct colour or without damage should still be the bare minimum#i'm just tired#and yes i know ordering online bad but it's a necessity for me atm due to my illness#sage posting
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Do you have any fics involving the Morston/Vandermorgan/Vandermarston art you’ve drawn? I love the dynamic and need more lol
If you're asking if i've written any rdr fics, not yet! Though I have a handful of things in the works, but I'm not promising anything nor that I'm gonna be able to finish any of it since writing is so much more finicky for me than drawing, I still have dozens of dmc fics I never ended up finishing and still 100% plan on working on but that have been languishing in the wip folder since 2022 :,,,,
#asks#thank you for the interest!!!#i have A Lot to say so hopefully I'll be able to get something down and get it finished enough to post#but as of right now it's just a miscellaneous mass of blurbs#i do wanna like. write at least one multichapter thats just basically me putting all my hcs into one cohesive story#but again its a big project and that one ive even barely started on lol#usually i need to visualize the entire story in my head first before being able to write it and i've had some issues with that#due to how busy life has been#i need to take a minute to literally just sit and Mind Palace about it lol
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perhaps. new headcanon dropped. that cori stops wearing the fortemps sigil earrings during the stormblood patches. and shtola notices this. and maybe has a little hope.
#but also she's probably like they took the earrings off and now hien is flirting with them akldjfsa#HOWEVER#cori is having inklings. thoughts. that how she feels about shtola MIGHT be different. than what she thought. (there's a fic)#but barely bc i love her dearly but she does not know what's going on.#anyway this is all due to me picking out an outfit for a gpose aldfjsdaf#and i didnt want shtola's dream girl (gn) to be wearing another man's house on her earrings.#HOWEVER. PART 2.#would be funny if cori was still wearing them but shtola just blocks them out in her mind#i need a text post tag
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just me life updating about moving and other ramblings in the tags lmao
#self obs#not snz#this shit is so stressful what the fuck?????#i also have a million projects due on sunday that i’ve barely started so saturday i move sunday i library#i am so happy to get out of my current living situation cause the people i live with couldn’t give two shits about me#it’s giving my childhood lmao🧍♀️#also i got diagnosed with pcos this week and am going to be starting meds for it next week so if anyone has any suggestions lmk#i heard back about my research and i got accepted so im super excited about that!!!!!#anyways my life is all over the place right now but hopefully after this weekend i’ll be on the up?#all my finals are in the next two weeks so i’m just so stressed#i can’t wait to eat a real meal i’ve been living off of energy drinks this week like 800mg of caffeine plus my adderall#yeah my doctor is very concerned about my heart but like fuck it we ball#anyways i’m stressed so i took a few shots lmao i hope you all are well#hopefully i’ll be more active and posting snz stuff soon#TELL ME WHY I FORGOT ABOUT MY OCS lmao i’ll write for them soon i promise#ok goodnight i need to pack more
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Recent things.. mostly just writing screenshots lol
#There's a water problem in the apartment so thats been taking most of my attention lol.. the way maintenance happens here is just#this big long vague wait with no clear communication. You just send in a request to the apartment building and then you might hear from the#any weekday from 8am - 4pm any time after that. Sometimes it's quick but sometimes its like days before you hear anything. So then#you just have to be operating under the assumption that at any time during working hours you might get a call or a knock at the door#Like if you were expecting company at any time for a week straight ghjhj.. ANYWAY.. I've been working on making a little discord#server thing for the game maybe for playtesters to communicate in initially i guess but then also after it's out or... something like that.#no idea how all of that works. but you hear about people doing it. or something... Still not entirely sold on the idea since I'm not really#a big user of discord format speaking (like little chats and stuff) but.. again idk.. seems like.. common.. for things...(< socially odd#hermit fumbling through trying to imitate what '''normal''' people do/enjoy/desire lol..). Since I think my biggest issue is I am very bad#at socializing and thus marketing since a lot of that is social. The type to just google ''what do people do about games once they've#made them'' and just go after whatever the top 10 things apparently are hjbjhbjh... But like I said. still unsure it will be utilized. it#all feels very awkward to me. then again most things do. But that's what the ''overall progress'' screenshot is from. the little channel#where I've been posting updates to myself lol. Also ''coding'' in that being used very lightly consdering it's ren'py and I'm only using#the very bare bones most basic functionality of it lol. Extremely intense highly daunting master level coding such as ''if x then y''. gbjh#slacked on writing a lot due to the evil maintenance and such things... and just general... appointments... events... aughhhhhh#I think it's Goose Time here or something because nearly every day I hear big V shaped rows of geese flying by like multiple#times a day and they're so pretty and neat to watch. They've really inspired me somehow. Today it was rainy and gray skied and high winds#and cold (some of my favorite most beautiful weather) and I went out to check the mail and like 6 or 7 rows of geese fluttered#by in the air. I felt like that meme image of that guy that looks kind of weird (william dafoe??) and its like black and white and#he's looking up at something almost teary eyed wide eyed in awe.. The goose... those are my goose.. the universe sent those gooses just#for me and the high speed winds blowing my coat open and chilling my face... a tender platonic kiss from the world is often delivered#by way of chilly weather and bird formations.. peace and love on planet earth truly..#OH and of course.. boy with boy!!!! shout out to those little mcdonalds toy animal plushies from like 2006 or something. I found the#gray cat one and was like.. hrmm.. I have one of those as well (a real life gray cat). surely they're friends now.
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Aw man I did the thing where I try to deal with the crushing anxiety by tensing my entire body and lo and behold the inevitable consequence of that is that now my body hurts. God dammit.
#i especially tend to wrap my hand around my arm or other hand and squeeze as hard as i can and now my finger joints are like ow ow ow why#hylian rambles#vent post#sociology professor reminded us of the big fucking paper due soon I've barely started research on and i freaked
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mm . mmmm. social media
#oyaspeaky#ahve been doing some thinking abt the state of things & my own stances. on what i wanna do#twitter has become such a shitshow that i barely look at it. bc it's a nightmare! and it's always been shit for my mental health anyway!#but also almost all of the ppl close 2 me use it as their main thing and it kinda feels lonely & bad to miss 99.9% of the things they post .#i just want to ahve fun and play toys with people but i know if i get active on twitter again ill have a breakdown within a week#bc im bad at limiting myself when i do certain things.....#tumblr & deviantart have always kinda been the sites tht feel most like Home to me#but pretty much everyone i care abt ditched dA due to eclipse! & so did i! the site's kind of a trashfire now!#this is mostly rambling at this point i am just. sorting my thoughts <3#the bottom line is i kinda feel a lil isolated from things and i worry that translates to others' perspectives as me not caring#i do care !! i just mostly live here bc otherwise id die#this post has no point but. ive been tryin to Blog a bit more. so heres a Blogging
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turns out hauling ass working on a project for two and a half months and have super limited free time for that whole period has got me feeling like i need to chew glass now that that projects basically done and dusted i can sit and do nothing for longer than an hour
#LIKE I FEEL LIKE A MOUSE GOING INSANE IN ITS ENCLOSURE#ITS REALLY WEIRD.#IVE BARELY DONE ANYTHING BUT HAUL ASS AND SABOTAGE MY INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS DUE TO STRESS FOR TWO AND A HALF MONTHS#I NEED HOBBIES#SUDDENLY IM NOT DEALING WITH MEETINGS AND BEUROCRACY AND THAT KINDA BULLSHIT.#MY HOBBIES HAVE BEEN ANSWERING SLACK MESSAGES AND BEING PISSED OFF AT MEETINGS. AND OVERWORKED#WHAT NOW#I HAVE THE ZOOMIES I NEED TO DO SOMETHING BUT I HAVENT DONE A LOT OF STUFF FOR FUN THIS SEMESTER#anyways normal again#needed to get that outta my system teehee#anyway ill probably post stuff about that project tmrw. or friday
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buried under academic shit and tssm obsession. why?

#im not even doing all my homework 😭😭#composition takes everything from me#like i spent a whole weekend doing only composition and im STILL not even half ready for tomorrows class bc i want to get it Perfectly Righ#my fishbowl genius bestie deserves only the best and im half dissociating from the Vibe in the process 😔#anyway. yeah. i aint gon show up much because i have so much shit due every week i barely get to rest. also have chronic no energy illness#not even a burnout bc i fucking love my speciality but just. yeah. wish i could fucking stop the time#(also the basic subjects are shit and i despise them except for english and it classes bc im fucking nailing it and want to learn more)#ALSO yeah tssm.i have So many thoughts on norman but i cant post them because i didnt rewatch season 2 yet. and theres no time for that now#also ALSO i have an analysis of mysterios themes and i want to look into ottos themes but i have to extract#both of those first which idek how to do properly and trying will take ages and im chronically perfectionist so.
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my biological clock is so dysregulated it can't be fixed atp i'm afraid because wdym i can't fall asleep at 3:30 am 😭
#i barely slept last week due to Numerous Exams#and so i slept like 11 hours last night#which would've been great if that didn't mean i can't fall asleep now#because guess what! i need to wake up tomorrow at a reasonable hour and STUDY for the hardest exam of them all#man i can't keep doing this when will it end#hwhdledu#ok i know when it ends i'll hold on 💪#my post#personal
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What does it say about me and how my life is going I wonder that I kinda recently went from my OTP being Seymour/Audrey to Anybodys/Ice
#that one annoying couple that always sits on the same side of the restaurant table together#vs. one of the people in this couple doesn't even know how he ended up in it#it's not like how I write Anybodys/Ice is super dark to contrast with Seymour/Audrey's wholesomeness but I still feel a contrast there#the contrast being that Seymour/Audrey are the kind of in love that makes you want to hit them with a hammer#you being me. nowadays anyway lmao I wasn't always this cynical#Anybodys/Ice are more... I feel like chill is the right word even though Anybodys' personality is anything but chill? yeah#I want to say I still love Seymour/Audrey but tbh I'm trying to just forget that whole part of my life as much as possible due to Reasons#they're definitely well written and compelling though#and now I'm onto the greener pastures of a ship between two characters who interact like twice and are barely implied to be friends#I didn't know how good I had it with a canon main ship until I got hyperfixated on something with barely any canon basis </3#I literally wrote over 20% of the Seymour/Audrey fics on Ao3 and here I am talking about wanting to forget all that oh my god#I don't regret writing those fics though. I got a lot of writing experience#also I do know exactly why my OTP switched as implied by these tags and in contrast to the post lmao#it's just that I'm not putting that on a public post#technically I've already talked about the events in question in public posts but eh
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Despite the heap of flaws in this rusty pile of wrongly tangled synapses, I could've made it work were it not for the declining autonomy of thought over the years.
#i'm constantly surrounded with those I can barely regard as people due to their complete absence of that autonomy#yet whenever I do come across someone who I wish I could have as a permanent piece of my life cuz of the ability to be themselves without#such glaring constrictions i get hit with a sense of... inferiority. fuck. no one has any idea how much i hate saying this.#and it's not like i lack the inner tools to build that version of myself i'd be so proud of.#it's more like somewhere along the way i developed extreme tremors and now i can barely hold those tools‚ let alone build smt(smn) with 'em#not even getting into those that are not only no help in that journey‚ but constantly pull me back into the current of the non-living.#and yet they're the only ones that are always “by my side”‚ for worse or the worst.#i could just tell myself i still have time by looking 5-10 years into the future and imagining myself finally‚ by some miracle‚ catching#up to that being i very rarely see in the mirror when I gaze deep enough.#but... how can I survive for that long? how will I be able to handle the crushing weight of all that lost time? it's too heavy as it is.#life or death‚ either is acceptable. not whatever this is supposed to be...#honestly the only reason i'm even able to write this post is this weird phenomenon of somewhat regaining that clarity past 3AM.#probably just the soothing silence outside of whatever tune i'm listening to at the moment.#em yaps#em hisses
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