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#i would stay up late at night thinking abt it... i was kinda obsessed
prodbyton · 4 months
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the way you LITERALLY READ MY MIND WITH THE PERV!SEUNGHAN YOU WROTE???? like, i had "perv!Seunghan = 24/7 hornball; "i need you right now"" jotted down in my notes 🧍🏾‍♀️ kinda crazy how you looked into my brain, but i love it!!
recently, i've been giving perv!Anton maybe a little bit too much thought. i already decided that it had to do with taking pictures bc DUHHHH 🤪 Anton loves taking pictures of you. all. the. time. you don't mind bc you love posing for him (foreshadowing :D). any time you're together he takes at least 40 pictures of you and usually sends them immediately so you can keep your insta current.
you dressed up for a little morning date in a cute and maybe a little short skirt, but you two ended up spending the whole day together. it was so late you decided to stay over. he was distracted by whatever he was doing on his laptop, and you had to beg for the pictures he took (like full-on send it to me Rachel!! 😫). he tossed his phone to you without missing a beat.
you open the photo gallery and just before you tap the first picture of yourself, you see an album with a puppy. it was so cute you thought "oh, maybe Anton has a whole album of cute animals!" you tap it and immediately your jaw hits the floor. the first photo was a shot right up the skirt you were currently wearing. you quickly composed yourself and continued to scroll. there were so many pictures of your ass and cleavage, it made your head spin. and the occasional shot of your bare pussy from the hot nights you slept in only one of Anton's shirts didn't go unnoticed. you eventually sent the clothed pictures of yourself to your phone and acted like nothing happened. that's when the constant posing started.
you started wearing skirts and dresses more and dropping things more often. every time you get up after bending over, Anton's ears get so red. one day you decided to give Anton the special treat of a short skirt paired with no panties. when you did your usual extended bend-over, Anton very quickly excused himself. he damn near sprinted to the bathroom. you followed him because why not.
you stood outside the bathroom and could faintly hear him whisper to himself something along the lines of "i shouldn't keep doing this. she'll be so mad at me". the whispers soon turned into moans whimpers and the wet sound of Anton fucking his hand. you stood there the whole time just listening. this was probably the hottest moment of your relationship that didn't last long enough. the door swung open and he was so red in the face when he saw you. his eyes were wide and watery as he searched for something to say.
-🎀 (i am once again asking the universe for a man who is obsessed with me and is Anton)
im glad we’re on the same page abt perv hani, but i lowkey wanna hear your thoughts now 🙈 but thats just cuz seunghan makes me crazy
PERV ANTONNNN im doing backflips. been waiting for this one fr 🫦 but ugh he’s definitely the type to sneak pics. he has you and everyone fooled with the dog as the thumbnail trick so no one would suspect a thing. but you’re just a girl and if you see a photo album with a cute animal on it ofc you’d click on it :/ but then you see what your boyfriends been doing behind your back and you don’t know what to feel.
any normal person would be disgusted, it was perverted and just nasty to put your take photos of your girlfriends panties under her dress/skirt, using his height to his advantage so he can get better cleavage photos, keeping his phone by his side to get various shots of your ass, all behind your back. but you can’t help but be a little turned on. your boyfriend was so obsessed and attracted to you that he felt like he had to sneak to get a few panty shots.
i think if you gave him photos of your body he would appreciate them soo much, but something about sneaking them and getting them during candid moments just made the photos sexier for him. he even has his live photo setting on so he can play the 2 second clip of you bending over while he’s jerking off.
you had already found out about his little secret, but when you decide you wanted to catch him in the act you knew you had to think of a plan. when he sees you outside the bathroom door you play it off as you were just checking on him since you needed to go after him, and he tries to calm his racing heart from the idea of being caught.
it’s not until later when you ask for his phone, an innocent request and it’s not like he would ever hide his phone from you. you said you just wanted to play games on his phone while he watched whatever was on tv. he wasn’t even thinking about moving his little folder into his hidden before handing you his device, but he didn’t think you’d be going into his photo library if you were playing games.
after a bit, you open his camera and start taking selfies and this shouldn’t be an issue, anton loves when you do this, he loves having photos of you in his phone, but he was so nervous of you opening his camera roll. he got tense, suddenly wanting his phone back and you raised a brow at him but ignored him. you played it off by saying you wanted to look back on the photos you took so you could send them to yourself. now he’s praying that you dont notice that one specific folder when you open the photos app.
but you do. and anton feels like he’s going to throw up.
“you have a folder of animals? thats so cute how come you never send me these?”
“it just slipped my mind i guess…” he chuckles nervously and runs a hand through his hair, and then everything hits the fan the second your finger clicks on the icon.
all the photos he had of you in compromised positions, up your skirt, down your shirt, and just full on naked photos of your weak body after you two had sex was on display. you pretended to be shocked, like you hadn’t already discovered the folder some days ago, but anton was a mess trying to explain himself. strings of apologies leaving his lips and he’s basically on his knees begging for your forgiveness. you just cup his face in your hand, rubbing soothing circles on his cheek with your thumb.
he looked super hot like this, so pathetic under your touch begging for you to forgive him and to not think he’s some sick pervert. but you reassure him that it’s okay, and he can continue taking all the pictures he wants of you.
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bemylord · 3 years
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↠ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ʀᴇᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴄʀᴀᴛᴄʜᴇꜱ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏᴅʏ ↞
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characters: gojo, sukuna, itadori, megumi, nanami, toji x fem!reader.
warnings: smut, aged up, marks/bruises, creampie, daddy kink [toji and nanami], oral [fem!receiving], degrade and praise kinks, grammar errors.
a/c: or s/o gave them scratches on their body. hc + drabble. kento's, toji's, and sukuna's part might be rough. also i may used inappropriate word don't blame me.
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ɢᴏᴊᴏ ꜱᴀᴛᴏʀᴜ:
would be teasing you in the morning for being too horny to suppress your nails. although, he doesn't hide the fact he adores the little pain when his clothes touch places where you left stripes.
also likes those moments when you're leaving fingernail marks on his thighs or hips whilst sucking his dick. it'd be better spelled if i specify that gojo using your head as a toy for his pleasure.
would praise you for marks you've given him, labeling his muscular body as yours, letting your fingers traveling all over his back to the chest, outlining every muscle.
prefers to do it slow but deep, touching the spongy coil inside you with his every push, feeling your hands on the back as you're trying to take his dick, being capable of not losing your mushy mind at his sharp pushes as how he's overbearingly fucking you.
'giving me all your juices and marks you've gotten for your master' satoru might be playful during the training time, but you've known he likes to talk dirty and be dominant railing you. those marks perfectly suiting on his skin so why not leave them?
despite being overdose with your cum and a facial expression - you opened your mouth releasing ragged whimpers and arching your back, approaching towards gojo's chest in the climax, cumming all over the base - he'd thrust in you more 'till you'd turn into the drooling mess below.
'yes, honey, you're doing good, so good. constricting my dick so good' obscene squelches become louder, as you could feel satoru's released on your stomach. 'you did so well, honey, i'm gonna take good care of you'
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ɪᴛᴀᴅᴏʀɪ ʏᴜᴊɪ:
okay, i think itadori would be the softest boy through all monsters we've got here.
but don't let his innocent face trick you. despite of the fact that most of the time he's a soft bun, he'll make you scream.
ok, make you scream and be asking if he isn't tempestuous.
he'd be disconcerted if you asked him to heal his back. for what? he thinks is a sort of a recall so he could remember what the two of you had been doing in the night and how loud you were while giving him your residue of cum.
he might take some photos of his skin pattern in marks so he could ogle at 'em later, repeating seconds where you were patterning his back.
'take off your shirt, yuji. i'll heal your back'
poor itadori is sitting on the couch totally discouraged as he heard your request. he glanced at you with a bambi look: eyes wide open, as if you said something vulgar. he aimlessly rubbed the back of his head, tossed his head back.
'but i like your marks, baby'
he whined, grabbing your palms in his, forcing you to sit on his lap, wrapping arms around your waist.
'you gave those stripes because you.. you were feeling good, yeah?'
you put your head down at his question but nodded, putting your head on his chest, hearing his heartbeat.
'then i don't need your recovery, baby, let your marks stay until you'll add new ones'
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ᴛᴏᴊɪ ꜰᴜꜱʜɪɢᴜʀᴏ:
let people know what sex is. let it be a slogan for your intercourse.
he could fuck you all night due to his long-term capability and would be smug after intercourse as he'd watch the disorder [?] you did on his biceps.
mostly biceps, cause a man knows the main destination of his tongue, masterfully giving you an oral. goddamn that tongue.
he'd let you scratch his back as he'll know that it'd be possibility to show off the mark his love gave him. on other days, you're pulling his hair into your pussy, burying him even more, letting him to destroy you before the fun will start.
his arms full of red stripes. though it wasn't your fault - how can you inhibit yourself while toji is literally eating you like a meal?
'being waiting for my tongue, huh?' he's a teaser - you're at the edge of the bed, baring your dripping pussy to the one he can lick you as you need to whilst teasing and degrading you.
'being waiting to be demolished by me you little whore, don't you?'
you grabbed his strong biceps, dotted them in half-moons then squeeze as toji peeks at you.
'answer me, slut!'
his low voice makes you open widely your legs as not closed to squeeze his head. he's running his tongue on your crotch and labia, teasing you, forcing you to say how reckless and anguished you were without his tongue and fingers.
'yes, daddy, i-i've been waiting f-for you' you sharply breathe, letting out the whimpers, feeling his tongue playing with your swollen clit.
'i'm about to ruin you tonight, are you ready?' he giggled once more, getting into the little game he's been waiting for since he left the house.
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ᴍᴇɢᴜᴍɪ ꜰᴜꜱʜɪɢᴜʀᴏ:
it is in their genetic code to make a woman scream but since megumi hasn't got a huge sexual experience as his father does, he'd be tender at first, asking abt your well-being, if he can move, etc..
when he watches at the mirror in the morning, he finds out his back and a few shoulders are drawing by your nails.
he'd be overwhelmed and speechless as he saw a reminder of the night.
'gumi will make up an excuse, sort of: 'i got into the fight with a curse, nothing special'. itadori'd have been asking him if he's okay, how it was but satoru isn't a naive one.
deep inside would be proud of himself that only he could put you on the pleasure, privately enjoying those patterns.
'y/n?' he pronounced your name in a question way, rubbing his shoulder aimlessly, as you glanced at him. you let out a quiet mooing as a response, staring as to how megumi taking off his school uniform.
'would you mind heal me a little?'
you smiled, coming closer to your boyfriend, grabbing a tube of medicine on the way.
'don't think i don't like your.. marks, just-'
'don't apologize, 'gumi, it's kinda chaos on your back' you giggled at your comparison, running with medicine on red stripes. his tensed and muscular body is overwhelming: those abs and pretty strong arms conquering every time you've got an opportunity to ogle.
'tho i love the chaos you made'
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ɴᴀɴᴀᴍɪ ᴋᴇɴᴛᴏ:
i'm certain you'll be scratching his back because nanami is packing - big dick energy, lol.
screaming his name as you've been drawing illegible patterns, mostly on his wide back, so lately he'd smirk at his reflection in the mirror.
those nights when you're trying to fill the lack patterns on his back by drawing lots of geometrical figures or promiscuous tracery.
every move with his tight white shirt at the office makes his stoic face change as he reminisces the night you gave that pleasant pain.
he wants to find half-moons littering his biceps as you were holding 'em while giving creampie on his dick.
if you want it spicy - trail your fingers on his back suddenly, giving nanami little goosebumps to switch his mood.
'darling, you want me to stop?' he unaware question left you desperate as nanami stopped pumping, left a soft kiss on your forehead. 'am i fucking you way too hard?' seldom moment of nanami being tender as he gets used to fuck recklessly 'till you'll be a dripping mess under his cock.
you didn't see fit to answer the question but smack your lips against his, as a silent response named: 'i'm fine, my love, you can move' your wet, deep, and in some way subtle kiss that doesn't fit on the action you've been doing. you trail your nails from the back of his neck to the coccyx, ogling as to how his facial expression changes.
'you want to be used like a slut you are, don't you?'
you couldn't respond, only purr as how nanami suddenly turned on into daddy. feeling how your empty pussy being filled out with a thick kento's cock again as he's making a demolishing [?] pushes.
'get what you want, slut, scratch my back so it'd dotted lately with your nails'
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ꜱᴜᴋᴜɴᴀ ʀʏᴏᴍᴇɴ:
as for that rough man..
he gives hickeys - you give him patterns on his back.
he'd be exceedingly obsessed after had seen your marks on itadori's body. still, itadori is a vessel for him, so sukuna will be even more self-satisfied. why? a little reminder for the owner who took possession of your body at the night.
once he'll take possession of the body, itadori it'd be or someone else, he won't stop himself as long as his back will be patterns of yours nail on it.
he does literally everything to make you scratch his back, whether it be licking your swollen clit to the way your legs got shaken or fuck you on his lap.
'let the bastard see what matures did it the night' his pace increase as he uttered the phrase that makes the butterflies in your belly thrives off.
his lowly and husky voice intermingled with ragged breathing, little drops of sweat on his hairline as he crushes devastating punches, letting your moans out of your mouth.
you're digging into his skin on the back as he masterfully target into the spongy coil in your stomach, feeling as your orgasm is building up with his every hit. he wants to see his back littering in patterns of your nails, wants to have that sweet but stinging pain in the morning.
's-sukuna, ugh~' you let out a whimper as your cunt constricting creampie on his dick. he chuckled as your hole clenching his thick cock while nails trailing all over back.
//~~//
idk i start always from sukuna and i've got inspiration only on kento's part, that's why nanami and toji might be rough than a king.
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keanureevesisbae · 3 years
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I was thinking abt sy with a lil idol gf and omg🥺🥺Bye he’d be so supportive🥰he would go to his gf’s shows and maybe even surprise his idol gf at a fansign and bring 20 albums for her to sign😭😭 the big bear definitely owns a bunch of merch and has a “secret” fan acc, He is overall just mushy for his girlie😩🤚(I’m so soft rn pls😭)
YOU JUST MADE ME THE SOFTEST HUMAN BEING ALIVE. OH MY GOSH, THIS IS ADORABLE, I LOVE THIS AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR PUTTING THIS IDEA IN MY MIND!! (side note: i used Jennie's Solo cover for the art and i also went out of my way to make insta edits - yes, i'm that type of person) also, thank you sweet anon for sending me this 💗hope you like it
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Captain Syverson x petite!cutesy!fem!reader
Summary: Sy has a reputation: a strong and powerful captain, who is never afraid and will never turn into a pile of mush. However, there is only one woman who is able to turn him into the ultimate fanboy.
Wordcount: 1k
Warnings: none
Sy is more of a country music kinda man. Growing up in Texas, near a bar with a mechanic bull, he was obsessed as a young teen with the idea of just touring through the state with a cowboy hat on his head and a guitar.
It’s just the fact that he can’t sing what stood in the way of a very promising country career.
He joined the military and forgot about the idea all together, but when he came back from his final tour to Iraq, his friends took him on a little welcome home drive through the country. They visited all sorts of bars, listened to all sorts of music there. Sure, all sorts of music had its appeal, but it would never be like country.
The final destination of the little road trip was LA and they went to a bar for new sing and songwriters to perform.
And that’s where he first laid his eyes on you. He remembers you sitting on a bar stool, back straight as a ruler. You were adorable, he thought to himself. Wide eyes as you were watching the stage, clapping your hands along with the beat and squealing when someone sang something particularly well.
And then it was your turn to get on stage. A sweet pink dress, matched with white sneakers and socks with a lace border. Nothing about the song you wrote and sang was something he usually liked. Very happy, up beat and your high voice sang every note perfectly.
Despite not his taste, he adored every second of it.
You seemed shy off stage, with the way you sat by yourself, but on stage that demeanor completely changed.
You were born to be a singer.
When you sat down at your own barstool again, he grabbed his beer and decided to sit next to you, get to know you. Everything about you was different. Petite, long hair and your feet didn’t even touch the floor.
He was supposed to stay in LA for two weeks, but that changed into a month and then two months, because he couldn’t get enough of you. He left Texas (something he never thought he would do) and moved to LA, where he got a job as a constructor. You quit your own job, one you only took to be able to pay for the bills and musical equipments. He loved helping you out, driving you from bar to bar, hoping your dream of becoming an idol would come true.
And one day, it happened.
You got an offer of one of the biggest agencies in the US and after the two of you read the contract multiple times, you signed and were an official idol.
Life changed a lot after that. You were either in the studio, dance practice and back at the studio again, however Sy made sure that you were well hydrated and fed, just like your back up dancers.
The people at the agency loved Sy and they often joked that he was part of the family that was created at the agency.
It all happened fast. Your first single, music video, first appearance at multiple late night shows and finally you reached one million followers on Instagram.
And he was right by your side.
His friends knew about his love for country, but they also knew about his much bigger love for you. They often would catch the big captain sing to the cute, almost bubblegum pop music you produced.
He didn’t care.
Sy had all your merchandise, whether it would fit him or not. He had your albums (all signed of course) and listened to them when you weren’t around. Sometimes he’d travel with you as you were touring, sometimes he stayed behind, especially after the two of you adopted a two year old American Akita.
The world knew you weren’t single, but you always kept Sy out of the spotlight, something he’d greatly appreciated. While you were born to be famous, he was born to live a more anonymous.
But that didn’t stop you from boasting about him on Instagram.
It had been at least three months since you saw him in real life. Your manager and all your back up dancers knew about his plan. Heck, they even helped Sy with planning it. He watches from the back, the line at your meet and greet stand growing smaller and smaller, until everyone has left. You let out a content sigh and want to get up, but your manager says there is a special fan still waiting in the back.
‘Really?’ you ask him. ‘Who is it?’
‘Very special. Super fan.’
That gains your attention, as your eyebrows are raised. ‘Do I know them?’
‘You’ve met them before,’ your manager says.
‘Oh, I do hope I recognize them,’ you say. ‘I don’t want to come across as such a bitch, you know.’
Your manager starts to laugh. ‘I wouldn’t worry about it,’ he says. ‘Close your eyes.’
You place your hands over your eyes and smile in anticipation. Sy quietly walks over to your table and places his newly bought album in front of you. ‘I’d like this signed, please,’ he says.
Within lightening speed you pull your hands from your eyes. ‘Oh my,’ you say, ‘Sy?’ You jump up, your chair falling behind you. You run around the table and wrap your arms around his neck. He lifts you up in his arms and gives you a kiss on your cheek. ‘I missed you! What are you doing here? How is Kal?’
‘Kal is good. He is with your parents.’
‘But what are you doing here?’ you ask.
‘I want my autograph,’ he says with a chuckle.
You press a kiss on his lips. ‘How long are you gonna stay here with me?’
He shrugs. ‘I brought enough clothing for let’s say… a month?’
Your eyes enlarge. ‘That’s the end of my tour! Oh, Sy, you’re staying with me?’ You have tears in your eyes and whisper: ‘I love you.’
‘I love you too, little lady.’
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neko-rogers · 4 years
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hey!! I’m not sure if your inbox is still open but I thought I’d send this just in case! what would you think abt a dark!peter who’s obsessed w s/o and offers to have her stay with him during like the stay-at-home pet of covid so she’s not alone then when it’s lifted he’s like lol you’re not leaving. sorry that’s kinda long and super specific. i absolutely love your writing though!!💗
Jamie All Over
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words: 2,040 (no, i should be sorry bc this was chaotic)
tags: didn’t expect it to be this LONG, manipulative!peter parker, grooming, overprotectiveness, slight mentions of sex, don’t expect too much lmao its a headcanon
a/n: hi babe! i wasn’t entirely sure if you wanted this as a one shot (but if u do let me know!)
so you’re pretty unaware of every move peter is trying to do with you, you know? you were not really sure if it was a kind gesture, as the gentleman he seemed to be, or was it just a special treatment
ever since second year and until now as both of you were on your fourth year, he was consistent with his efforts
these moves were moments like when he would carry your books to your next class or confidently invite you to a study ‘date’ at the library after – often times he tells that his friends were invited, but would never show up later on
sometimes he would bring you lunch. you tried to turn it down kindly, but he insists that it was purposely packed as an extra for when he stays late around the university.
it was a lie though. anyone could tell by the way it was prepared looking very appetizing and tasted just as amazing at it was presented. 
and as peter had mentioned that he lived alone, you also assumed he was the one to make his meals. you were so sure he doesn’t pack for an extra and intentionally wants to impress you with his skills.
“hey, y/n!,” he calls, “look this eggroll has a cute design!”
he honestly was an epitome of a walking sunshine. his smile seemed so pure and you never felt any ill-intent for every gesture he had done for you
his friends seemed very welcoming the moment he introduced you to his group
you got along with ned who seemed to be just as joyful and funny as peter. meanwhile mj was a bit more of a tough cookie, nevertheless you both eventually got a long better than you expected
however, it came to one point wherein your own group of friends started being disheartened with your lack of communication
“you’ve been spending more time with that parker boy, huh?” “yeah, kinda?” “are you two like... dating?” “oh no! no... no... nooo!”
the moment they frowned at you was then that you realized and felt a little more guilty. you always remembered that friends were supposed to be friends despite the lack of time and effort, right?
somehow you tried to compensate for the lack of time with your friends. but every minute you spend felt more awkward than before
they weren’t sharing the same vibe with you and you were starting to question if it had been always like it – were you only adjusting to them?
you reached out for peter, considering that he became one of the closest and trusted people around the university. plus, he seemed to have genuinely great friends
“do you feel happy when you’re spending time with them?”
“well i used to but recently–”
“then you should stop being friends with them.”
you were upset for a second. the way he instantly told you that cutting ties with them would be the (only) option
he sounded serious on the other end of the line and you were just speechless for a moment. the dead air between lines was evident, but you didn’t know what to say
“sorry,” peter makes up, “i didn’t mean to sound too serious. i just don’t like people who are rude, especially to you.”
“oh, it’s fine. i totally get it.” you felt a batch of butterflies around your stomach. someone actually cared for you!!!
the moment you didn’t hesitate on losing your friendship with your past friends and moved on with joining peter’s group, things felt lighter.
somehow you felt more expressive than you realized. they were open to your ideas and thoughts, just as you were with them. you felt super comfortable and realized that you weren’t holding back on anything anymore
that’s why you had expected your winter break to be better than your past ones
everyone agreed to skate around the ice rink in rockefeller for christmas. along with it, also spending new year’s eve at the time square
news flash: you finally had the cliche new year’s eve kiss, with none other than peter parker!!! hooray!!!
for anyone who had common sense, your feelings for peter had accentuated. you weren’t denying it either, and the boy wasn’t oblivious to it too
he was just so irresistible and kind to you, like, all the time – to surreal, honestly
you felt and KNEW you were spoiled with peter (and his friends, who liked to spend time with you outside too, just not as much as him)
just as you were planning your spring break activities, it had to be postponed for another time
a lockdown had to be implemented around the country as it was under the state of a pandemic
mj and ned told the group that they’ll be with their families since lectures had to be concluded for the mean time
you planned to do the same, but you expected that this situation wouldn’t last long. so you chose to stay in your dorm rather than return to your hometown
completely sucks since you not only don’t get to hang out with your friends, but you weren’t able to see anyone in person...
until you got a text from peter
he was literally inviting you over his apartment since he explained that he wasn’t returning home either
you practically rushed to pack a small amount of clothes for a sleepover whilst not forgetting to wear a mask (bc it’s fucking important ok)
you arrived at his address and a big warm hug ensues 
his unit was so tidy and you were convinced he did it to impress you
peter was so happy to see you, acknowledging that you’re also spending a few nights with him
the nights mostly consisted of eating snacks and binge watching movies
however during one of those nights, both of you got a bonus – making out on his couch and further, completely forgetting the television
making out with peter wasn’t awkward at all. most of the time he was the one in control, which you didn’t mind
his hands treated you so gently but the way he teased you made you crave for more than what he was offering
a lot of whining, swearing, and begging – you weren’t aware but he was enjoying it a lot
on his side, he did praise you from time to time, but most of it consisted of raw tension and actions. the room was full of grunts and short breaths 
just want to include how sexy peter would be while he moans all over you. like his whole sunshine personality just drained away the moment he places his hands on either sides of your waist
the next day you felt like a princess even though you know it shouldn’t be???
apparently peter prepared breakfast for you and you felt embarrassed walking around his place only in the shirt you wore yesterday and underwear
just when you thought the extra lunch he packs for you was already amazing, the breakfast he prepared whilst being fresh and hot was just incredible
“you really like it?”
“of course! you really have to teach me to cook sometimes”
peter laughs and jokes, “yeah, don’t worry. i feel like we’ve got a lot of time ahead.”
ok fast forward to a few more days when you were beginning to feel like a freeloader. he lets you borrow a few of his clothes as yours were in the laundry
by the time you wanted to stop by your place, peter started to be more... clingy
at first he didn’t want you to go but after a few more debates, he felt defeated and instead insisted on going with you
eventually you caved and let him. it wasn’t that bad either, he talked to you about a lot of things on the way leaving you entertained the whole walk without realizing how far it had been
he helped you ‘pack’ more stuff so you wouldn’t be going back and forth from his place and yours. you felt like you were going out of town for a month with the amount of clothes and products
both of you returned to his place around late afternoon. you felt pretty tired and didn’t hesitate to pass out on the living room couch
when you woke up you sensed that you were in peter’s bedroom, meaning he carried and tucked you during the night
plus! an arm was wrapped around your midriff and you could feel peter’s breathing against your side
you closed your eyes and appreciated the moment. it was cute and made butterflies flutter around your stomach, and you tried not to move much to not wake him up
anyways apparently the pandemic lasted longer, and more serious, than expected (fuck the government and their incompetency) 
you spent more time with peter and was thankful that you didn’t spend this quarantine alone
within a blink of an eye, a month and a half already had passed. you couldn’t deny that most, or all, days have been unproductive
eat, cook, watch tv, cuddle, fuck, repeatedly get spoiled??? yeah sounds like the dream
weird though because you haven’t completely brought up to peter if you’re actually in a relationship with him. oh no were you just friends with (a lot) of benefits??
but you also felt like it wasn’t the time to bring it up. neither of you were saying anything so it was best to let it be for the fear that things might go downhill from there
anyways this continued for more weeks, especially since the ‘stay-at-home’ policy was deemed necessary
you started to help him do errands around the apartment just to feel like you weren’t an actual freeloader – but it wasn’t a surprise when he kept insisting that you should relax
more cute moments
more sexy times
and more cuddles during night (peter’s grip became tighter every night, but you shrugged it off assuming that it was just you getting homesick and overthinking)
ok but when you brought up being homesick and mentioned that you planned peter wasn’t entirely happy about it
the way he acted wasn’t just clingy. he insisted that he’d be the one to go and that you were staying
“ok but i’m not a dog, peter?” “i know, honey, but it’s too dangerous outside. i wouldn’t want you to be at risk.” “i wear a mask?? i follow health protocols?? i’ll be fine??” “you don’t understand–”
oh god he was becoming controlling
you tried not to argue anymore, rather ignoring and pushing past him to proceed to the door
and peter instinctively wrapped an arm around your waist and prevented you from walking further
there was a lot of struggling, but you didn’t know he was this strong. literally what the hell.
you tried to scream too but he pretty much threatened you to your core
“let’s talk this out,” he grunts as he secures his grip around you
“the hell? let me go!”
things got more complicated. he did convince you to talk with him (by means of tying your arms and legs to incapacitate you from running and righting)
it was a nightmare. he was really soft and sweet with you, even getting teary eyed after stating, “i only want what’s best for you... for us”
however you could sense the manipulativeness through it despite being making everything else look convincing
“trust me, sweetie, i wouldn’t want to hurt you. it would crush me” “please don’t cry. i’m only protecting you” “people are disgusting, they don’t deserve an angel like you” “don’t worry, i can protect you”
it terrified you to your nerves, sending shivers across your spine
at first you didn’t realize it, but eventually after days of being trapped, you figured he had been grooming you the whole time
he tried to make you dependent of him and somehow he did a fine job. just not enough to completely exploit you
though, it made you question what would have been better in your situation: being conscious of his sly nature with the hope of escaping or being unaware and completely wrapped around his finger whereas letting him continue how greatly he had been caring for you?
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hisirdovx · 3 years
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help i have owl house brainrot after the new episode and i cant stop thinking abt this so i’ll just jot down my thoughts here: tldr, i think that belos, phillip and “creepy luz” are all directly connected. spoilers for “eclipse lake” under the cut.
So, we got a Belos face reveal this ep which was... really unexpected. It was the first thing we saw, and there was no fanfare about it at all, dude was just straight up working on the portal with his mask off. Which seems... kinda odd for a villain who has been faceless for the entire time we’ve known him, and whose appearance probably holds a lot of weight. You wouldn’t expecat such a nonchalant reveal like that.
Furthermore, he looks a lot like Hunter. 
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There are many little things that indicate that Hunter and Belos are not related by blood: Hunter’s use of the words “took me in” implying that Belos had found him somewhere, and now, this particular book that also seems to imply hunter was specifically found and potentially even kidnapped by Belos: 
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I definitely do not want to discredit these, because I think they’re important, but I also think that the striking visual resemblance between the two as well as Hunter calling Belos “Uncle” are important as well. They might not even necessary contradict each other, if Hunter is actually the son of Belos’s sibling, for example.
This leads me to the relation theories that have circulated as of late, mainly about Belos and Phillip Whittebane. The two most prominent theories I’ve seen so far are the following:
Belos himself is Phillip
Hunter is a descendant of Phillip
Belos’s obsession with the portal and returning to the human world lines up interestingly with Phillip as a human lost in the Boiling Isles, and Phillip’s side profile bears a striking resemblance to that of Hunter’s. If we take in the new information regarding Belos’s own appearance into account, we can see that both he and Hunter share strong similarities as well, mainly through their hair and the distinct gaps in their left ears.
Additionally, this episode also gave us some information regarding Belos and his fascination with the human world: he’s been there before.
“You know, I’ve been there before, did I tell you that? The trees there are green, nights are quiet. I look forward to seeing it again.”
I think all of these things coupled together lend a lot of credence to the “Belos is Phillip” theory. However, the way Belos talks about the human world, as well as the discussion of how Titan’s Blood works has made me think about a different idea. What if Belos is to Phillip Whittebane what “Creepy Luz” is to Luz?
The “Phillip is Belos” theory hold a lot of water, but there are a few things about it that just never made sense to me. Such as:
Why would Belos willingly donate his old diary to the library, even if it was kept in the Forbidden Stacks?
How could Phillip have stayed alive for so long (especially now that we have his official appearance, and he hardly looks older than a strung out 30 year old?)
If Belos were Phillip, how could he do magic without the use of a staff like Hunter’s, as human don’t have bile sacs?
If Phillip made Eda’s portal, as the diary entries imply, then why did he not use it to return, and how did it get left lost in her backyard?
The last one has always been the biggest sticking point for me. The portal clearly was working and functional when Eda found it, and for long after, too. Why would Phillip willingly throw that portal back home away, and why only now would he suddenly be so interested in it as Belos?
But what if Belos wasn’t actually Phillip, but rather someone who just... looks a lot like him? Someone identical to him, who could take his place in the human world and leave that realm none the wiser to his disappearance? What if Belos was someone from the Demon Realm who, like Phillip to the Boiling Isles, became fascinated with the world of humans?
Think of it like the concept of changelings, human babies swapped at birth for monters that look identical to them. If something from the human realm gets lost, and slips out of that realm through a “leak” of Titan’s Blood.... shouldn’t something go in to that realm as well to balance it out? That’s what happened with Luz, it seems.
Basically, I believe that, much like how “Creepy Luz” is a stand-in for the real Luz back on Earth, Belos was a stand-in for Phillip when Phillip was lost in the Boiling Isles. Once Phillip returned, Belos had to go back to the Boiling Isles as well, leaving him fascinated with the human realm and desperate to go back--but with none of Phillip’s actual direct knowledge of how to do so.
Additionally, as this twitter user pointed out, we still have the scenes of Camilla in the police department and Luz floating in the black liquid to come in next week’s episode. I honestly think both these scenes will tie directly into the Creepy Luz conundrum as well as the use of Titan’s Blood. 
(As for the Hunter relations to both Belos and Phillip--I’m not too sure either way. I believe this changeling-esque theory could stand true regardless of Hunter’s origins; I simply wanted to bring them up to tie into the connections between Belos and Phillip.)
edit: ok after scrolling twitter for a bit, it seems like the book indicates moreso that hunter may be a clone as opposed to a literal descendent of either belos or phillip... either way i am 👀
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blxetsi · 4 years
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modern sasha braus dating headcanons
lowercase intended !
college!sasha braus x gn!reader
had to write something for my queen 😌✨
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- she shares her food with you. I Dont Care She Does
- also since this is a modern au i dont think she would have such an obsession with food as she does in the canonverse (if we can even call it an obsession) i still think she would have a big appetite (and she'd be proud of it tf 😏🙏) but i just dont see her always being hungry as the fandom makes her out to be
- really likes to hold hands with you
- i think itd be really cute if she was studying to become a baker ?? maybe taking a culinary course at the university you two attend ?? maybe you somehow met there or through a friend
- i think she'd still be insecure about her accent (ig if this is au is set in america she'd be from the south 😐🤚) and would speak kind of like a robot to people she didn't know that well
- connie and jean ALWAYS bring out her accent tho,, like with them she can really be herself
- i think when you were starting to get to know her she would be speaking very formally, and youd take it like shes being kinda stand offish or like,, just doesnt wanna talk so youre thinking "okay maybe she doesnt wanna be friends 😁👍" and would back off
- now sasha's upset because you are so cool and unique and she just wants to know so much about you but youve been very distant lately ?? like did she do something wrong ??
- she tells connie, jean, marco, and niccolo one night and connie and jean are on the side of "find y/n and demand to know why their behavior has changed" while marco and niccolo are on the side of "respectfully dm y/n and ask why they havent been wanting to see sasha recently"
- sasha goes with the latter of the two and dms you after passing you in the dining hall, you two literally keep glancing at each other, texting while you sit with your respective friend groups
- after everything gets cleared up sasha is immediately inviting you to hang out with her crew, and even getting some of her other friends like eren, mikasa, and ymir and historia to come join too
- if she has all the people shes comfortable with there, itll be less scary talking with her accent !
- You Love It. You Think Its Adorable.
- you guys would definitely have a friends to lovers type relationship
- like friendly hugs turn into slightly longer hugs, and now sasha will constantly ask to sit next to you during movie nights
- loves to rest her head on your lap while she spreads across the couch
- i think you two would have your first kiss in niccolos apartment
- you two were sitting in his kitchen, with sasha munching on the leftover food he made that night for your get together
- his mom had called him so he decided to leave to go to his bedroom to answer it
- and slowly you guys just kind of,,,, leaned in 🙈✨
- it was slow and really romantic, kinda rough with the crumbs that were around sasha's lips but you didn't mind
- niccolo barged in and ruined the moment 😐🤚 good going pal 😁👍
- you two were so shocked that you two tried to leave
- ended up just walking down the road in silence like wtf i thought yall were trying to get away from each other 😭😭😭😭
- sasha ended up staying the night 🤩‼️
- NOT in a sexual way
- but in like a,,,, rue and jules kinda way where jules comes in through the window (but only sasha didnt come in through the window she came in the front door with you) and you two held each other and gave each other smooches for the rest of the night
- sasha woke up late and missed her morning classes 😐🤚 didnt even care and went back to sleep with you
- i think for the most part you get along well with her friend group
- youre definitely closer to connie, jean, niccolo, marco, and historia
- ymir teases you guys a lot and you cant tell if what she says is just jokes (it always is) or if shes completely serious
- eren, mikasa, armin, annie, along with reiner and bertholdt are more of aquantances to you, just because you dont see them as often as you do the others
- she has such a weird relationship with her english professor
- will literally complain how much work he gives his class and then the next day will gush about how great he his bc he gave her a granola bar for her effort in her assignment
- girl pick a script and stick to it 😐🤚
- has a collection of stuffies on her bed. i dont make the rules.
- anytime theres a carnival in town she drags EVERYONE there.
- you all agree to split up into groups so you can all check out what you want, but you always agree to meet up and eat funnel cake together 🥺
- sasha tries to get you to win her new stuffies
- if you cant do it, or just want some for yourself, shes calling connie and niccolo up PLEADING with them to come find you guys,
- then she claims theres been an ACCIDENT and that you two need help
- niccolo is zooming bc he cares abt his besties 😌✨
- connie texts jean and marco to come find you guys too 😭😭😭
- who gets a kick and a lecture for lying courtesy of niccolo ? sasha. but who also gets a bunch of stuffies won for her courtesy of niccolo ? sasha.
- for your anniversary i think she'd want to do something really fun with you
- she'd set up a pillow fort and have a bunch ot string lights and stuff, have all of her favourite stuffies (which are the ones she thinks of you when she sees) in there too.
- she has chips, she baked little pastries and cookies, and she ordered your favourite takeout
- you guys just watch whatever you want on netflix or whatever and its such a nice night
- it becomes a tradition for you guys, but you two always take turns with setup
- one year sasha did all of the planning, baking and whatnot ? okay now its your turn 😁👍
- you guys even started doing themes now 🤩
- if you guys play board games with your friends youre on sasha's side whether you want to be or not.
- shes also the kind of person that says "i can win fair and square !" but then when bertholdt starts kicking her ass in monopoly her script changes real quick 🙄
- now its "y/n,,, give me some of ur money" and "y/n, buy this property for me" like girl,,,, what happened to playing fair 😍⁉️
- will try and do all of those s/o pranks you see on tiktok
- its hard to get a genuine reaction out of you bc you can TELL SHES RECORDING but she tries anyways
- we love a perservering queen 😌✨
- will call you at random times of the day asking if you guys can see each other
- "y/n ??? are you there ??" "sasha its 2am wtf do you want 😐" "do you wanna ride your bike with me down to the park 🥺"
- also is very observant, knows when youre overworking yourself
- will try and pull you away from what youre working on like "lets go get you something to drink, or maybe we can watch an episode of that show you like before you continue working !"
- if youre persistent that you just HAVE to finish it tonight and cant stop and take a break she'll respect that, until you stay at your laptop for over an hour 😐
- just softly pulls you away like "no lovebug, lets get some sleep okay ?"
- is also very protective of you
- overheard someone making fun of you ?? talking shit ??? her besties better hold her back before she gets suspended 😤‼️
- and since connie and jean absolutely ADORE you, you better believe theyre helping their girl sasha out
- those three are the LEADERS of the "protect y/n club"
- it just becomes niccolo and marco trying to dissolve the situation before it gets physical, and then reiner and armin joining when they walk directly into the chaos
- armin tells you what happened and as much as youre thankful that sasha cares about you so much that she'd defend you like that, you lecture her, jean and connie on not making scenes like that again
- sasha's love language is kind of like,, a mixture of quality time and physical touch
- she just really loves spending time with you, but also very much enjoys being in your arms
- she doesnt shy away from it, and is usually the one to initiate those things
- will hold your hand PROUDLY down hallways or on streets
- always hypes you up too, shes very much so your personal hypeman
- "oh lovebug you look SO GOOD rn oh my god" "sasha pls im in my pyjamas" "and you look like a model baby !"
- sasha is very stubborn however, and if you guys ever fight she is NEVER the one to apologize first, or seek you out to talk about it
- even if shes in the wrong she cant bring herself to admit it, she dug herself into such a deep hole with the stance she took that she doesnt want to take the walk of shame in admitting that she wasnt right
- this can cause a lot of problems in your relationship, but after you explain how much it affects you, shes trying to change
- will always work on her stubborn-ness and pride
- and it actually makes her feel a lot better being able to admit defeat, or being wrong
- she really likes being communicative and honest, especially with you
- i think overall your relationship with sasha is very very fun, filled with good memories, good food, good friends, and most importantly, love.
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no bc i really do love her 😐🤚 lemme marry miss braus rq 😏✨
hope u guys enjoyed !! remember requests are open so if you have anything youd like me to write DONT BE SHY ❤️‼️
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navegandoaciegas · 3 years
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PLSHEJWBE IK EXACTLY WHO YOURE TALKING ABT!! HER NAME IS ALLISON & SHE WAS V ANNOYING!! there’s a spoiler if u care,
(thankfully she died at the end of season 3 oops-)
& same i wasn’t too focused on bucky in catfa for some reason, like i was during the science fair scene (although i was so jealous of his date even though he’s fake & i was like 10 when i first saw that movie, i’m just a jealous person ig😔) but after that he kinda went out of my head the whole movie, although i remember when catws came out i was utterly obsessed w/ that movie, so obsessed to the point where i rewatched it nearly every night from summer of 2014 to jan 2016 (part of this is to blame on my mom bc she’d take my phone/laptop every night so i’d sleep & i have bad insomnia so i’d stay up late, & since i had no other form of entertainment i would just rewatch it on my tv in my room she thought i didn’t use.... then again there were plenty of other movies i could’ve watched... but bucky was hot & somehow relatable & i just rlly like the whole dynamic in that movie bc no one like tony (that sounds so mean) was in it to make fun of steve or something.... even though nat did make fun of him but she was always joking.... i think tony just bothers me tbh VWJWHAH)
No because I also hate tony??????? Sksjjsjs worst character in the mcu and i’m not taking criticism
AND SAME??? I GET JEALOUS SO EASY AAAAA ESP WITH FICTIONAL CHARACTERS 💀💀 i said this once, i’ll say it again: i only ship myself with hot ppl 😌
Also catws is the best mcu movie and i get why it would be your comfort movie bc honestly??? Same. I love the dynamics with sam, natasha and steve and i love the thriller like plot. Also i’m a whore and i love bucky as the winter soldier, oops
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mercuriial · 4 years
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hello i’m back w another lsdkfjsdf this is seb !! his entire personality is that he is dumb n owns a diner. thank u for comin to my tedtalk. as always , if u want to plot then like this / IM me / msg me on discord !!
TW: DEATH !
✎⌠rami malek. cismale. he/him⌡❝ — well, look who’s just arrived ! if it isn’t the one and only sebastian amer. though, around here they’re known as the rogue. don’t tell ‘em i said this but the thirty-four year old restaurant owner kinda has a reputation of being detached and egocentric. but y’know, they can be open-minded and flamboyant too. typical gemini. anyways, welcome home and stay safe sebastian ! ❞ ↷ jin. 18. she/her. pst.
BACKGROUND
born n raised in misty hollow !! has literally never left the state ! this place is his entire world ( not in a sentimental way ... it’s just all he’s known )
seb was born as the middle child with an older n younger sibling , all boys ! very chaotic. but basically it’s ur typical story where the middle kid was never rly noticed ,, his older brother made lots of dumb decisions ( which seb learned from hehe ) while his younger one was the overachiever of the family n his parents basically bowed down 2 him while seb just kinda got by
like ,, nobody ever had any high hopes for him. his parents wanted to make something of his older brother in spite of him bein awful, and they already knew his younger brother was going places n it was just kind of ... accepted that seb was the mediocre one
so uh,, he did the usual . did whatever to get attention ( also because he knew he wouldn’t get any, his parents always just wrote him off as seb bein’ seb and saw him as a lost cause ), annoyed the shit out of everyone for fun , had imaginary friends n generally did whatever it took to not be taken seriously .
he was close with his mom tho !! like it was mostly his dad who was ,, super shitty n disappointed in seb . his mom was still always really encouraging n was kind of the one person he could actually talk to 
n then when he was seventeen his mom died of a stroke :( n it was so AWFUL . like the one person he had ?? gone !! n now he was stuck in a house w his dad n brothers, none of whom cared much for him at all 
he barely graduated high school , would come home late all the time ( or just not ), basically just like ... perpetuating the cycle of people thinking very little of him. went to jail a few times for things like stealing , vandalism, stuff like that
his dad’s retired now n he’s been passed down the hollow diner !! he’s been running it for quite a while now , n worked there beforehand so it’s pretty much been his entire life. this diner is the one thing he cares abt , like ever since he became the owner of it , he’s put so much time n work into it to make it something that is his and not just his dad’s !  he will do dumb shit until 4 in the morning but will always show up to work the next day 
don’t rly know what else 2 say because his life has been boring like . his life is literally tied to misty hollow - he’s never been anywhere else ,,  he’s just done .... not much with his life other than dumb stuff that rly doesn’t matter in the grand scale of things ( in his opinion ) 
PERSONALITY
seb has a moral compass but just doesn’t ,, use it ?? like he knows he’s a shitty person but at this point he thinks it’s a bit too late 2 turn it around n what else would keep his existence afloat if not for doin dumb things n getting people angry ! 
claims he has never been in love but also falls in love a little bit with every person he meets <3 like he will see a pretty girl n think she is the prettiest girl he has ever seen in this world n then stay up all night thinking about her ... until he sees the next pretty girl
but this doesn’t mean he’s a ROMANTIC ,, he’s just obsessive ? in all aspects really
very Very Avoidant . bad coping mechanisms . if he sees conflict he will a) just act completely normal like it’s not happening or b) run the other way n try 2 forget abt it 
he’s fuckin’ annoying but mostly just self-destructive ?? like never INTENTIONALLY gets in the way of other people ,, ofc he’ll be annoying but on a serious note , he doesn’t want 2 hurt other people ever . he just doesn’t care about himself v much
makes up random weekly specials at the diner hehe
WANTED CONNECTIONS
ok ok ok give me . a best friend who is down for anything ,, they just hype each other up n it’s chaotic but it’s fun !!
people who do not Like him . there r so many ways we could go with this !!
an EX !! i REALLY really want an ex that he was so super in luv w but they left ,, to leave misty hollow n move onto better things
friends w/ benefits ! he would have so many of these n there are so many different dynamics we could do !
regulars at the diner !! secretly seb always looks forward 2 their daily run-ins n he remembers their orders ,, probably sit around n talk for hrs sumtimes hehe
people who seb can be serious w !! even with these people ,, the serious moments would be few n far between but still , give me vulnerability ! 
anything !!!!! i am so open n excited <3 
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eijiroukiriot · 5 years
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After Months of saying i would i’m finally posting about my Kiribaku playlist! I’ve linked it before but I’ve never really gone into what the songs mean to me and how I see them in relation to the boys, and I think the explanations puts things into perspective, so I typed it all out!
This is my main krbk playlist - I also have playlists for Bakugou and Kirishima separately - and this focuses mostly on happier songs (and a few that are so ingrained into how I see them that I had to put them in anyway). I also have an angst-themed krbk playlist and post-breakup playlists for each of them! Really I just. love music and love seeing characters I like in it so this is fun for me 
Spotify Link
song descriptions under the cut!
i typed up all of this after 1 a.m. last night so not only is it very long it’s also somewhat incoherent but these songs mean a lot to me so if you’re down to read it then thank you!!
note: a few of these songs aren’t available on spotify at the moment but they’re so crucial to the Vibe that i’ve still included them here!
i. I Always Knew - The Vaccines
“So let’s go to bed, before we say something real - 
Let’s go to bed, before we say how we feel” 
-this is my Ultimate krbk song, man. the first time i heard it i was walking to class and i just had to stop on the sidewalk and take a Big deep breath. everything abt the lyrics fits them so well - i’ve talked about this before but the verses and prechoruses really capture that “being young and stupid and tiptoeing around your emotions” feeling, then the chorus hits and it just SOARS, and really, has there ever been a sentiment that fits them more than “it’s always been you” 
ii. Fly Me to the Moon/Lucky - Rick Hale
“Fill my heart with song and let me sing forevermore - 
Tell me I’m the lucky one you worship and adore” 
-I have an extreme soft spot for these boys and love songs. and this has been a part of my fic writing playlists for so long that it always makes me think of them. I don’t even have a lot to say by way of lyrics, this is a full atmosphere pick 
iii. If My Heart Was A House - Owl City
“Circle me and the needle moves gracefully back and forth -
If my heart was a compass, you’d be north” 
-boy if this song doesn’t make me think of bkg every time!! it’s the transition from the prechorus into the chorus that gets me - it starts so quiet, like there’s so much love inside of you that you’re still trying to keep down, and then the “bombs away” is the moment when you decide to stop running and just embrace it, and the chorus comes in so loud and strong and so thoroughly in love. call me a sap (spoilers: i do that myself multiple times here) but it really does remind me of what it must be like when bkg just...decides to let himself have this. and then i feel dumb bc this is about anime boys who are like not in love in canon at all but inside the intricate Kiribaku Canon i have built in my head oh yeah this is how bkg falls in love
iv. Knock Three Times - Tony Orlando
“One floor below me, you don’t even know me - I love you” 
-this is just the prime soundtrack for a college AU where kirishima’s dorm is right above bkg’s and he’s in Love with him. And Also, something about the bold retro vibe makes me think of kirishima, but that almost certainly a me thing! still a big bop though 
v. Intergalactic Disco - Interlunium
“So, with stars in our eyes, let’s fly through the glowing galaxies” 
-again, a big sappy atmosphere pick! i really do love the imagery in this one and the storyline of playing things off as just having a good time until it turns out the other person is as deeply in love as you are. it really is just That Song! please stan interlunium
vi. Animal - Neon Trees
“Here we go again, I kinda wanna be more than friends” 
-the ENERGY in this song!! the loud, highkey, driving beat! the vibes of being young and stupid and stumbling through having feelings for someone equally as inexperienced with love as you are! and yet the fact that we KNOW both of them would run full-force with it once they realize they both want it! the lyrics to this one do get a bit spicy but it’s really the high school crush energy in this one that gets me 
vii. If You Wanna - The Vaccines
“I don't want to do things independently, but I can't make you stay -
That's what all the friends I do not like as much as you say...but if you wanna come back it's alright”
-the ENERGY in this SONG!!!! the electric guitar and the chorus so long you think he’ll run out of breath! bkg getting so fed up with being so close to kirishima’s face and not being able to kiss it that he takes the dive and goes for it and then goes to run away until kirishima yells WAIT- IF YOU WANNA COME BACK IT’S ALRIGHT!!!
viii. No One Like You - Best Coast
“Been around this crazy world, but I still wanna be your girl - 
Cause there’s no one like you.” 
-I feel like...if krbk had a cheesy high school romcom, and everything led up to a big dance at the end, and at the very end the camera panned out as they finally caved into each other and went onto the floor to do that slow dance, this would be the song. This is their slow dance 
-seriously like 70% of the lyrics to this song are “there’s no one like you” which is really, once again, just the Pinnacle of krbk 
ix. Idfc - Blackbear
“'Cause I have hella feelings for you -
I act like I don't fucking care, 'cause I'm so fucking scared” 
-the bkg energy in this song...the self doubt and the pining but the deep-seated belief that you don’t deserve this, even though you’re so close, even though he keeps telling you he loves you- but how could he, he has to be lying, and why would you even care, you don’t care about people like this- you never have, until now...oh this song is just DRIPPING in it
x. My Best Friend’s Hot - The Dollyrots
“Won’t you apologize to me, to me, to me? For being such a tease, a tease, a tease” 
-it’s a song about being pissed at your oblivious hot best friend who you have a huge crush on! they might as well have credited the lyrics to bakugou katsuki 
xi. Stay by My Side - Twice
“I can’t hold it back anymore - 
I can’t even believe how much I love you” 
-it’s Cheesy Romance! it’s cheesy romance that’s all this is!!! this one is pure michigan cheese!!!!! 
xii. Love Line - Twice
“With you by my side, I wanna take a shot, take a walk on the love line” 
-again this is a very me pick! this one’s been sitting around on my writing playlists for a long time and i’ve come to really associate it w these Boys. the member who wrote the lyrics has said it was about her first crush and it’s generally about just. being So enamored with someone you can’t stop thinking about them. and i’m a big sap so you know where that goes 
xiii. Maybe (Luck of the Draw) - The Vaccines
“There’s nobody else like you, there’s nobody else like you -
And if there’s nobody else like you, then maybe I want to spend my life with you” 
-this one always sounds to me like krbk growing up, spending late nights both awake in the dimly-lit kitchen of their second apartment, watching the hours tick by on the microwave clock as they just talk and argue and make each other laugh and slowly realizing that this is by no means perfect but there’s no one else they’d rather keep getting old with...i feel like this is another end credits song for them, you know? 
xiv. I’m Totally Obsessed with Him - Matt Fishel
“He’s in my heart, he’s in my lungs - he’s in everything that I touch” 
-matt fishel deserves SO much more than he gets i mean LISTEN to this huge campy gay anthem about being just extremely an unapologetically in love with your big gay boyfriend!!!! i feel bad making pride anthems like this about anime boys but i’m also gay and i’m here to say that the absolute SCALE of this - the explosion of electricity and infatuation and campy guitar in the chorus - this one has BIG kirishima energy. words can’t do it justice just please please listen to this one 
xv. Slayers - Matt Fishel (again lol) 
“We’re in this together, you and I -
Hand in hand, side by side, unbreakable” 
-It’s a song about being in love with someone who you see as your total partner, you rely on each other and protect each other and you’re with each other through everything, and it’s written through the lens of a fantasy story - this one always, always makes me think of the two of them in the fantasy AU, sworn partners for life, able to rise above any challenges in their path, flying into the sunset together after a long day of adventures, so happy that it seems to make the world spin 
-this really may be the most krbk song i’ve ever heard so please listen to it, 
-i played it for my krbk friend once and when he said unbreakable they started screaming
xvi. Hooked On a Feeling - Blue Swede
“I’m high on believing you’re in love with me -
I said, I’m hooked on a FEELING!!!!!”
-picture this: class A crammed into a karaoke room for a party, kirishima standing up in front of the scream and screaming “THIS ONE’S FOR YOU BKG” and belting out the entire thing, slightly off pitch but FULL of spirit, every time ‘girl’ comes up in the lyrics he sings ‘bakugou’ really really fast (‘I CAN’T STOP THIS FEELING, deep inSIIIde of me, bakugouyoujust don’t reallize!!! what you do to me!!!!”) and everyone is whooping and hollering along except bkg who gets so red that nobody can tell if it’s angry embarrassment or in love god just so in love embarrassment 
-it’s hooked on a feeling it has such loud kirishima energy do i have to explain myself here
xvii. Everyday I Love You - ViVi (Loona) 
“If only you liked me - if only you loved me
Like a fool, I think only of you” 
-note 1: stan loona
-note 2: this song is just such a sweet picture of pining!! imagining the stolen glances and ‘hopeless’ crush feeling when (in some AU where they both have. less emotional hangups the first time they meet) they first meet,, i can’t explain it for this one even it just makes me so soft 
xviii. Crush - Weki Meki
“This feeling- like I’m losing, it’s hurting my pride
But I can’t help it, I’m so curious that I’m going crazy” 
-i’m sure you can tell by now that i. Really like kpop but the first time i read the lyrics to this one i lost it! there are really too many lyrics than i can fit here that remind me of how bkg sees kirishima when he first realizes it’s really a crush that’s making him act like this - i really recommend that you take a look at the translation for this one!! it really has it all - being mad at your crush for how they make your heart pound, feeling like it’s hurting your pride, “it’s not like me to be circling around you like this, i’m gonna make a move”, the line about how “i’ll be better to you than anyone else” - seriously, i cannot exaggerate the bkg energy in these lyrics 
xix. Kimi Janakya Dame Mitai - Masayoshi Ohishi
“I want to get to know you more and more - but that kind of line doesn’t really fit me” 
-aaaand here’s a song that radiates EXTREME Kirishima Energy!! everything from the vibrant guitar to the big belted chorus to the lyrics about being, like, confused but absolutely buzzing and just wanting to be with them - it’s loud and bright and awkward but THRILLED about every part of it!!
-it, of course, helps that the title essentially means “it’s gotta be you” 
xx. I Do Adore - Mindy Gledhill
“Everything you do - it sends me higher than the moon” 
-like….is there a more classic song to associate with your favorite stupid pining high schoolers ship 
-don’t get me wrong i KNOW this one is cliche and i KNOW there’s other ships this fits better but i’m soft don’t @ me 
xxi. Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You - Frankie Valli
-legally this song is only Half in the playlist bc spotify likes taking it down and putting it back up at random but after writing fly me i can’t NOT think abt krbk when i hear it. i have no further justification 
-also imagine kirishima being loud and embarrassing and singing this song to bkg all the time
xxii. Television/So Far So Good - Rex Orange County 
“I don't know, no, I don't know what you like,
But if you're looking for something new, I know somebody that you could choose: 
What about me?” 
-what about MEEEEEEEEeeeeeEEEe 
-i think it’s that driving guitar rhythm that makes this one for me. it just sounds so...ready to take on this weird new feeling of knowing how perfectly things could go with someone if you both just took the jump. it sounds very kirishima. 
-the content does start changing as it keeps going but those first few minutes and the RAP VERSE really have such bubbly dumb teenage ‘it’s our first time feeling like this and it might be a little too serious for us but why don’t we take the leap i’m sure it’ll be worth it’ vibes. it really feels like the first “what about me???” in the chorus should be accompanied by kirishima sprinting up to bkg and lifting him up and kissing him because he’s so caught up in this feeling
xxiii. Sweet Talk - Saint Motel
“When you laugh, I forget that it’s about me 
But it’s alright - cause being your punchline still is something” 
-we all know this is a krbk song, everyone knows it’s a krbk song, my non-bnha friend who I annoy constantly w krbk stuff knows this is a krbk song, honestly do I even have to explain why? it contains the line “you could yell ‘piss off, won’t you stay away’ - it’d still be sweet talk to my ears” and we All know how whipped kirishima already is 
xxiv. Into The Storm - Banners
“Through night and dark, through fantasies that fall apart,
Know you're always in my heart, anywhere you go” 
-Unconditional love! Working through the hard times together! and knowing these two, there have been & will be no shortage of hard times to work through. it’s that loyalty and devotion that makes this one. 
xxv. Talk Too Much - COIN
“Stay cool, it’s just a kiss - so, why you gotta be so talkative?” 
-when it comes down to it bkg and kirishima are two idiot 16 year olds who have never been in love before so you know they’re gonna stumble a lot when they first get together. i don’t know how to explain it but i think this really captures that
-also i feel like this is a pretty staple krbk song! i see it on so many playlists
xxvi. If I Tremble - Front Porch Step
“And if I tremble at the sight of you, it’s not because I’m cold -
It’s because I’m staring at the girl I want to love me when I’m old” 
-that idea of the kind of love you want to last forever, knowing the person you want to grow old with...I honestly don’t like this one for them that much anymore but it Did make me cry the first time I thought about it so it gets to stay. tbh when I’m soft enough it still gets me 
xxvii. Cold Cold Man - Saint Motel
“You’re the only one worth seeing, the only place worth being -
The only bed worth sleeping is the one right next to you” 
-Saint Motel is just krbk culture at this point, this is another staple krbk song. I mean, the core theme is “I know I’m an asshole but I love you more than anyone” - come ON
xxviii. Wonderful Things - Ryan Corn
“So you say you wanna grab hold - well to hold, you’ve gotta let go
Of the only way you may have ever known” 
-is this song about god? maybe. is it about krbk? Oh absolutely 
-the themes of not knowing what you’d do without the other person in your life, and looking back on the person you were able to become because of them, and that lyric up there always makes me think of Kamino - it’s just all around got the themes and I’m very soft about that
xxix. Bad Enough For You - All Time Low 
“You love to hate me when I'm chasing you, 
And I hate to say this, but I'm stuck on loving you” 
-Okay this is totally 12-year-old me talking here but hear me out: Bakugou being convinced Kirishima could never like him more than this weird half-flirting thing they’ve come to and also being scared that he’d never be good enough for him, but him as he is now is letting them HAVE this half-flirting thing, so...he keeps it up, even though he wishes he could be the one to treat him how he deserves to be treated, but there’s no way he could be Kirishima’s boyfriend anyway so what’s the point in caring (but kirishima loved him the WHOLE TIME!!! they sort things out before long lol)
-also they’re both 16 and emo so. 
xxx. Instead of My Room - Charlie Burg 
“Can't we just put on Ramones? And we'll drive
And I'll kiss you, in my car, instead of my room” 
-if kirishima wrote songs with kaminari and sero during high school, i think they’d sound like this
-the lyrics to this one are just so Fun! it’s goofy and jokey and just having a good time! i can’t make the lyrics line up as much as i’d like them to but it really just sounds like them to me 
xxxi. I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing - Aerosmith 
“I don’t wanna close my eyes -
I don’t wanna fall asleep, cause I’d miss you, babe” 
-i have exactly 2 krbk moods and one is “they are stupid. 16 and loud and just so dumb” and the other is “this is Love love, they’re gonna live off this forever” 
-kirishima looking over at bkg fast asleep the night after their wedding and feeling so wholly in love that he cries 
xxxii. Stutter - Marianas Trench
“So here I am - you can take or leave me,
But I won't ever be anywhere but here” 
-If krbk starred in a mid-2000s battle of the bands romcom with a car chase scene this is the song that would play in the trailer (I KNOW that’s crazy specific but that’s the image I always get when I hear this) 
xxxiii. Must Have Done Something Right - Reliant K 
“If anyone could make me a better person, you could -
All I gotta say is I must have done something good” 
-i feel like i’m 13 when i hear this song but it’s really really Them
-really i think the thing that keeps me so invested in krbk is that they’re so involved with each other’s character arcs - they’re constantly making each other better people, each of them is like a missing piece for the other, and they’re both so wrapped up in their own shortcomings that they barely even realize how big of an impact they’re having on the other. but really they would never be the same if they hadn’t met. and that’s the entirety of this song’s content
xxxiv. Deer in the Headlights - Owl City 
“Tell me again, was it love at first sight
When I walked by and you caught my eye?” 
-there is literally nothing in the lyrics that makes me think of them. this one is 100% for the vibe. and also kinda the lyrics in the chorus. like, being taken aback by how suddenly everything is happening but in a very excited and enthusiastic way. things don’t go Smoothly when they confess, persay, but oh man is it memorable (and loud and sweaty and hoarse-throated but never, ever sad) 
xxxv. On and On (About You) - Bowling For Soup 
“Now you can scream about the little things, slap me twice across the face,
Man it would be great if I could buy you flowers every day” 
-this is really middle school me speaking here BUT: 
-krbk don’t exactly work out in high school and end with some big fight but with time they both realize they were wrong and when they finally meet again at a class reunion they both wanna get back together but they’re still arguing and shooting quick remarks at each other but the whole time they’re thinking “man, if i could, i’d buy you flowers every day” 
xxxvi. Mamma Mia - ABBA
-it’s mamma mia. it’s just mamma mia
-it’s also kirishima’s inner monologue every time he thinks he’s finally kicked his crush on bkg and then he sees him for 0.1 seconds and falls right back in 
xxxvii. I Dare You - The Regrettes
“I can't seem to sleep, and I feel my pulse beating
I wanna keep all my control, but you're the one that brings the sun” 
-maybe it just reminds me of the music video song in quote love unquote but the second i heard this song i was like oh yeah that’s kiribaku
-the idea of trying to catch yourself as you feel yourself falling but also choosing to make the jump in the first place! the idea that you’re taking a big chance but things are so much better together that you’re not scared! you’re even pushing yourself forward! it’s truly for them 
xxxviii. I Want to Hold Your Hand - the version from Yesterday
-like, fuck the beatles but it’s a song about hand holding. come on 
xxxix. Love At First Sight - The Brobecks
“Turn the lights off, I’m in love” 
-that lyric has happened in canon. that lyric is the context of why bkg went to bed at 8:32 pm that one time 
-it’s such a sweet mix of being scared about falling in love but also...feeling like the world just got a little brighter, and kinda letting yourself sink into it in reluctant acceptance because it just feels so good? kinda hitting the same notes as If My Heart Was A House. idk the first time i heard this i thought abt the girl i have a crush on so i was like “nope. nope. refocus this to krbk” 
xxxx. Holliday - The Weekend Run Club 
“I'd never been so soaked before
I was drenched in your arms, dancing in your downpour” 
-this was on my discover weekly last week and I put it on here without thinking about it and now I”m really listening to it for the first time and. wow. Wow. 
-you know the scenario i’ve been bringing up this whole time of taking a leap into something awkward and electric that makes you happier than you could imagine? that’s the energy i’m getting from this
-just imagining krbk being out on their first date and it starts pouring so they duck inside and they’re like “well...should we just go back?” and then realize it’s so much more like them to run out into the downpour and get soaked and kirishima’s losing his mind laughing and bkg’s like “what are you so happy about idiot” and kirishima’s just like “i don’t know. i just really like this. i just really like you” and then they’re both kinda floating on air
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ask-shakespearehigh · 6 years
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Q&A post with the Mods!!!!
This is going to be a long one oh boy
How strict is the delineation of creative control vis-a-vis characters/plays between the mods? (@pedanticlecturer)
We generally have the plays split up along lines of “what we know”— we have a list at the very beginning of the blog. Sometimes we’ll draw the others’ characters (mostly me drawing some of Star’s…) but even then the final say on characterization is up to the “main” mod for that play — mod aster
what aster said -- mod star
What is your favorite play? What is your favorite character in terms of how they were written in the source material? (@pedanticlecturer)
I think my favorite play overall is Macbeth, just because I like the vibes (and the fact that I too could kill Macbeth), the fact that you don’t say it’s name in theatres, and the fact that it’s a play I did a full read through and analysis of in class. Favorite character? Puck from Midsummer. — mod aster
uhhhh,, hmm. ive always had a soft spot for midsummer since i saw it with aster esp bc of how fun the costumes were. of the comedies it has the largest potential to be the most visually pleasing bc of the concept of fairies,,,and im gay and dramatic so i love that. id die if i got to costume design for midsummer,,,or be in it,,,yeah. fav character. hmm. probably mercutio?? i recently saw a version of romeo and juliet where mercutio was played by a woman and oh my god it was amazing!!! not to mention mercutio’s portrayal in baz luhrmann's INCREDIBLE version of r n j!!! (I based my mercutio design on him) he just spends the entire time making dick jokes. love that. -- mod star
How do you answer asks so fast? I mean it's great but I'm impressed 😂 (Anon)
Personally, it’s a mix of: notifications on, quick drawing speed, and using the blog to avoid my class work — mod aster
aster is fast and (as you can see from all of my answers) im lazey -- mod star
Are there any elements/characters of the plays you're covering that you would have liked to work into this blog's plot, but couldn't due to the constraints of the setting or the synthetic nature of the blog? (@pedanticlecturer)
I wanted to make everyone gay but unfortunately due to plot constraints we have to have some hets but that wont stop me from making it lgbt as possible. -- mod star
I did want to make The Tempest more of a central play, but it just didn’t translate well. Similarly, other supernatural elements like the witches in Macbeth. This isn’t so much a constraint mentioned, but my own time/energy means that I want to show the Macbeth backstory, in a specific format, but I can’t right now— mod aster
Is there a hierarchy of import when it comes to each play's individualized impact on shakespeare high's general arc? If so, what plays are crucial to the foundation of the story? Which ones did you do mostly for shits and giggles? (@pedanticlecturer)
This is phrased like an ACT question and i might not answer it right so sorry in advance but: mod aster and i only selected a few plays for each of us to do given we dont know all of shakespeare’s works, but we tend to put more emphasis on the the more well known. But it also comes down to 1. How much we have plotted out for each play and 2. What the followers ask about most. Our two most popular are hamlet and macbeth bc people are familiar w those but around march caesar always becomes relevant again. I didnt even have designs for some of the characters until someone asked about them. -- mod star
I would say the same as star— it generally comes down to what people ask about. I will say that the overall plot is sort of separated into “has happened” and “is happening”. Like, the human potion of Midsummer, Julius Caesar, and Macbeth are all in the “aftermath” portion, while Twelfth Night, Hamlet, and Romeo and Juliet, among others, are happening. We’re trying to incorporate as much as we can, and I don’t think any of them were really put in without some thought.— mod aster
What personal significance does shakespeare hold in ur guys' lives? (@pedanticlecturer)
I go to a theater school rn and so ive dealt w shakespeare (although not all of them) it also helps that i was in loves labours lost last year as moth and that i read hamlet and r n j. Theres also a theater in my state that always does One Big Shakespeare per season and they always do them super well!!! My love for shakespeare probably started w seeing midsummer at that theater w mod aster!!! So. Theater kid rights!! -- mod star
To be honest, I got back into Shakespeare Because of the blog. I’ve been friends with some people that got really Pretentious about Shakespeare, and it kinda put me off of it. I did have a book of abridged plays (the plays’ plots written out in prose, basically) that I read as a kid, which is what got me into not only the plots of a lot of the plays, but also the idea of having them illustrated. And, same as star, the theater in state does the One Big Shakespeare— and they tend to do some really cool things with the costumes, setting them in diff time periods. I haven’t been able to see any lately since I’ve moved, but they still slap. — mod aster
🥰😘💙🥰🥰💜💟🥰I 😍💗💚😍😍LOVE🖤🖤 YALL ♥️♥️🧡💛💚💝❣️💕💘💖💗💓💞💝❤️💛💜 okay now i have a question i swear— how long have the two of you been doing art??? and what were your first shakespeare plays??? (@hellaghosts)
Uhh i started drawing when i was like idk 12 and i have the giant boxes of sketchbooks to prove it!!! I moved to digital art at abt 14-15 but mostly stayed traditional until this yr when i got a Neat New Tablet so some of my sketchbooks are sitting abandoned rip. My first shakespeare was either romeo and juliet or midsummer nights dream and i love both of them v much!!! I have a very old piece of art that i did for r n j for my freshman class assignment on it and it hasnt aged well alsdjfjafd circa 2016 i think??? -- mod star
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Oh man. I started drawing when I was about 10, but it was Bad. I don’t think I got much into drawing again until I was about 14? Sometime around the end of middle school/beginning of high school. I would say I started getting into drawing as more than doodling/coloring edits sometime around 2015-16? I would draw on my iPad with my finger, then I got a tablet for my computer, and now I pretty much stick to my iPad with an Apple Pencil. My first Shakespeare play was….. uh…… probably Midsummer???? I have No idea. We would go to plays when I was little, so I honestly don’t remember if I saw others before. It may have been Romeo and Juliet— I had that book where it was the original and the “modernized” with the little dog that explained things— which, if you know it makes sense, but if you don’t is probably a bonkers answer. — mod aster
Do you think this blog has like? An overarching thesis (be it b/c intentionally or simply b/c ur own take on the world has bled thru to the point where u believe it’s central to the piece at this point)? (@pedanticlecturer)
Not gonna lie, I had to read that like three times AND dm you to figure out what you were asking from us and all I have is “be gay, respect women, write your own happy endings”. — mod aster
This blog started with an ides of march shitpost and you think we have enough brain energy to write a whole thesis? I projected feelings of found family onto my half of the blog but idk if that counts. Be gay do crime 420 69 -- mod star
What’s the nature/rough dynamic of ur relationship? How do y’all know each other? (@pedanticlecturer)
Met mod aster when i was like 4 and even tho we didnt live close we became like, best friends although the Best part didnt start until we were like 13-ish and eventually we talked like non stop (about anime and homestuck. Yknow. 13 year old kid things) and we didnt see each other a lot bc of Distance and now its even worse bc aster is in colleg.,e but we consider each other siblings regardless of family bc we’re adopted into our own respective families so that bled over into our friendship and it would feel weird calling him anything other than my brother now. We’ve seen each other at our best and worst and if you really want a good insight on what we’re like as siblings watch griffin and justin mcelroy’s overview video of catlateral damage wherein i am griffin and he is the long suffering justin. -- mod star
Star is basically my long distance sibling and functionally the only cousin I recognize bc like their parents are basically an aunt and uncle and like our dads look enough alike that we’ve both accidentally gotten the wrong dad for a hug or similar so like. Anyways yeah Star is the Griffin to my Justin, complete with our absent middle brother who we love dearly— mod aster
Dubiously relevant q but what kind of music do y’all listen to when u do art (if that is indeed a habit either of u partake in) (@pedanticlecturer)
It can depend on the piece? I was working on some (unrelated) oc prints that were song-focused, and for those I just listened to said song on loop. Sometimes I have playlists. Sometimes I’ll just be in a Mood and throw a song on loop. But a lot of time for the blog, I’ll listen to The Adventure Zone for the billionth time, because I have Too Much Attention. I’ve also, on request from Star, linked the most recent “loop song”.— mod aster
I tend to obsess over the same like 3 songs every few weeks so those get listened to on repeat but it also depends on the tone of what im drawing or who im drawing i might genre switch bc of that. If im drawing ophelia i stick to lana del rey and if im drawing hamlet its the neighborhood, horatio is sufjan stevens etc. i have categorized,. Most of the characters i draw into different songs/genres/energies of music but not like i ever follow that. Sometimes i just pull up a really long nonsense video and forget to draw. Essentially: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ -- mod star
How’d y’all come up with ur pseudonyms? (@pedanticlecturer)
I love space so much and my main blog is starryeydsailor space gay rights!! Im also tiny and full of energy and bright so basically i;m star -- mod star
Uhhhh i was like “hey i want to do uhhhhhh flower?” And then I google searched flower names until I found one I liked —- mod aster
How did you end up deciding the rough timeline of events in canon? (@pedanticlecturer)
It’s mostly determined by like. How we choose per story? If that makes sense. Like, we just take story by story, and decide “is it happening, has it happened, and when?” And then we fit them together in relation to each other just by dint of. All existing at once. Like, I knew I wanted Macbeth to be in aftermath, because like, even though there’s no murder, the way I’ve translated it to the AU is still kinda heavy, and it’s something that I don’t know that I could do properly if it were happening right now. Also, it’s more interesting IMO to have them at different times. Tl;dr we wing it per story and slot them together— mod aster (mod star agrees I just can word better, in theory)
If you could tell the story of shakespeare high in a different format than an ask blog, would you? Obviously y'all are making very good use of the format, but would you want to write this as a animated series or like? a comic book? or is the form inseparable from the story? (@pedanticlecturer)
I kinda wanted to do a webcomic or maybe to plot develop through like, animatics but the element of surprise comes from the asks we get and really makes us think so the blog is a good start. We didnt think we’d get this far -- mod star
Pretty much what Star said— there are certain elements where it’d be neat to do as a comic or as an animatic. Like, the fantasy dream is like, an anthology webcomic of each story, where you can like, see other characters in the background and stuff. But to be honest, we develop a lot by what we’re asked— there was a post about developing worldbuilding by being asked questions and then pretending you’ve thought about the answer, and it’s not far off. Personally, it’s hard to just lay out a story, because I have a whole WORLD and what’s relevant? What are people interested in? It’s by getting questions that I can then focus in on an area to develop. And yeah, we Super didn’t think we’d get this far lmao — mod aster
Any headcanons about your characters that you don't think will ever come up on the blog through asks or plot posts? (@pedanticlecturer)
I could make a whole separate post for this!!!!! Mostly its voice headcanons (and by mostly i mean like 1 or 2) or relationship hcs!!!! -- mod star
Honestly same. I don’t think I have voice headcanons for mine, though I bet I could find some. I’ve got a bunch of miscellaneous headcanons that just kinda float around, but like they’re scattered, too numerous for this post, and also not always things I’m sure are canon yet.— mod aster
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youryuri-x · 3 years
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₍ᐢ. ̞.ᐢ₎ ʕ•̫͡•ʔ ₍ᐢ._.ᐢ₎ ᐢ..ᐢ
Today has been up and down
Up and down up and down. It hasn't stopped. Not since morning...all i wanted was for you to have the best birthday.for you to be happy on your birthday. I wished and I manifested. And I'm so so happy to hear have had the the happy birthday you deserve.
Aw you looked so cute today...your birthday sash that was completely adorable on you and odlysuited you really well...i thought you looked so so good in it...every day I look at you.
Hehe you really did look like 'the king of the day' , or whatever it said on that sash...
I take a moment (it many) to take in your beauty. I'm always shocked at how much of an immense amount of beauty you posses...its like every day your beauty gets more and more ethereal...
You always just radiate this aura that attracts me so much...whether it's through your beauty or through anything you do...its just wow.
And today your aura was such a beautiful one. It was almost like you were glowing with the birthday fever of happiness and excitement, and as soon as you were in my presence I felt it too.
Seeing your 15 year old self for the first time was....wow.i
was feeling pretty on edge so when you came over to me as calm and as loving and cuddly as ever it made me so happy. That you stiw had time for me on your special day...it was such a huge comfort for me that you still cared about me even though it was your day...your perfect your perfect your perfect...
I said happy birthday to you and then you said it back hehe. It was rly cute and gave off the kinda clumsy almost shy vibes.... I've never seen that vibe comimg from you before...or maybe it was just me that noticed that.
But yes the highlight of my day personally was that moment.when you came over to me excited and in a lil clumsy shy tizz, and I told you happy birthday and you said it back to me. That was one of the most cute things I've ever seen you do irl...i wanna hear you do it again....
The rest of that lesson, which was English went by.
I got the plesure of being able to look at my birthday boy being happy out of the corner of my eye while trying to write something down about lady macbeth or whatever.but ngl I was definitely more focused on you.
English is that lesson of the day where I can look at your side profile for 50 minutes streight. And I love your side profile just watching you talk to someone or look at the bird or my personal favourite thing to watch is you running your hands through your hair, and from the side I get the best veiw.
I swear most of what I do in English is watch you like your something very very interesting on the TV lol.
But your side profile...its like a ethereal painting of an angel...so beautiful...and also kinds hot at the same time...
But yes you are compleatly mesmerising to watch...so interesting...i physically can't take my eyes off you.
I try and look somewhere else but my eyes wonder their gazr to look back at you. And I don't blame them. Your beautiful so beautiful. My eyes just can't miss such beauty.theh are drawn to your beauty like a moth to a flame...
Sorry if I sound creepy...i probably am..its just that my eyes can't stop looking at you...
You make English lessons such a treat to my eyes..and to my imagination. My current favourite fantasy is of me biting your neck like some sort of vampire lol >~<
I can't help thinking it. Ik it probably sounds weird but your neck just seems to be calling me to take a lil bite.... (sorry im weird asf)
But then the bell rang desrupting my vampire ass fantasies and snapping me back into the real world where I needed to get to physics, and biting your neck unfortunately wasn't my main concern...
Pysics...
I got to the class sat down and..wellt thought about you ngl. Just in a general way. Panicked that everyone else had got you better stuff for your birthday, and that I haddnt done enough, since I was the one with the honour of being your girlfriend.
And I mean your basically a god so it's a pretty big honor...
I between these thoughts I was doing the actual work that needed doing, and turning round to cheak the clock despite having a watch on.
Anything to see a glimpse of you, the light of my life in a dull 50 minute gray morbidity that is also known as Pysics.
The main event in physics was when you walked to the front of the class, allowing my eyes to take in your whole immage. I basically held by breath and just focused on you till I started subconsciously fiddling with my stapler again and gazing at you, basically drooling under my mask and then...
I stapled my mf finger. Your mf beautiful self made me staple my finger. It diddnt really hurt, until it started pissing out blood. I put a plaster on it and it was fine, but it shows how much of a klutz I am, and also how much of a sucker for you I also am...
Then it was breaktime. I gave you your present, and told you not to open it in front of me. Ngl it was a selfish asf thing to say...i was really self conscious...beacuse I knew everyone had got you great presents, especially after you told me that naci had made such an effort for you...
[Ngl I envy naci. She what I want to look like. Be like. I mean she has my old best friend and knows you I should stop lol. But just if your ever reading this, I've been envious of her ever since I've first saw her. Life isn't fair why can't I look like her?! I swear you'd be with her if I wasn't there...shes just wow. I wanna me her yknow lol? 🥺😩😩]
But yes I was really self conscious, and feeling in my full on jelous moody people hate mood, especially for the people who you were friends with...
It was probably down to the 3 hours of sleep I'd been getting for the last week each night, and the fact I'd been on the edge. But I feel really bad for saying that... I should have just lrt you open them...
Ngl I wish I'd have been able to see you put on a smile when you opened it. Put on the bracelet I made for you...too late now, but ig this will be a lesson to future me...
I swear allot of the time I use these blogs for getting better. Like being better to you cuz I read through my mistakes and I try to be better. That's why I'm making a note of these things lol.
Then I went with Angel beacuse I knew if I stuck around I could be a harard, being a jelous sleep deprived slightly Yandere aspie girl, I just decided to remove myself, cuz I was feeling like a big angry self concous raincloud and wanted to stay out of your way to give you the best day possible lol.
So then it was biology a lesson of looking at your extreamly attractive back profile....
And half listening to miss heart go on about the heart, ofc. All i knew was my heart circulates my blood around my body for you. Cuz your the one who makes it beat. And you make it beat fast.
I was watching you..ehehe I sound creepy. I pretty much am ngl. Sorry...i don't wanna make you uncomfy but I csnt help it.
I usually see you and fin pissing about during bio, but this time you squeezed his thigh. It made me pretty angry. That you would do this in my full view. It made me god damn angry, ngl. I mf wanted to lean over the best and squeeze your thigh, just so you'd know I'd seen. But ofc I diddnt do that. I'm too introverted. Doesn't stop me from getting angry and kinda hurt about it.
I mean im usually pretty sensitive about stuff like that. When your too close to someone when you know I'm around, watching or could see it. I try and egnore it with you and Sam. I don't like being angry and sensitive, especially not to you.
But sometimes it feels like I need to set some boundaries. Cuz you clearly dont see that there are boundaries of getting a lil too close to someone in the full view of your jelous asf possessive gf!!
Despite her not saying a word about it ever to you, trying to hint it to you, hoping you'd look back on these times and realise how they make me feel you haven't stopped. Ngl it doesn't bother me in the long term at all. I've got used to it. I got used to it with Sam pretty quick. But I always feel a lil uneasy when your too close for comfort or too flirty with someone else where I can see it even if it is just for a joke.
It makes me more uncomfortable becuase then it's like wtf are you like behind my back? If you think it's ok to do that in front of me? Everytime I think about I start crying ngl tears and all. I like to think I'm special to you and get special treatment I have no idea tho.
Your a charming guy with little boundaries. I don't expect much loyalty...i don't need loyalty I just your affection and love . Sorry for mentioning this if you ever see this pls think over what I've said.
That type of stuff really hurts me. When you do it in front of my eyes the thought thya your doing worse behind my back, even if it isn't serious, even if it's just for a joke.
I'm a sensitive little shit in reality, and I actually cried over your Instagram post becuase my insecure selfish ass was getting uncomfortable abt the video of you and naci >~<
Idk it just diddnt sit right with me that you put it on your ig where I could see. Idk if your seeing what I mean. Put yourself in my shoes about it...
But yes sorry.
Bio ended at it was lunch. I tried sitting with the group and it drained me I needed dto be be somewhere else where I could sink into the world of my mind, and the way I do that is through tumblr. Making sense and note of the things in my head.
I sat by jake. We diddnt really talk there was no need neither us us wanted a conversation I just felt comfortable cuz I knew I wasn't comoleatly alone. Jake was there so I spent lunch manifesting you a happy birthday. Obsessing over you and getting jelous. Being pulled into short depressive random states
Thinking about you. Listening to a capella ariana grande until I felt selfish enough to crawl back into people territory, to get some attention. I wasn't quite on jakes level yet I still needed some degree of people. I pushed down all my negative emotions and watched you lie on the grass for a few minutes, before you went, left me and I cried, becuase my self worth had randomly dropped, and I was thinking about the whole thing I explained earlier. I put on a smile and no one noticed. It made me feel numb. But then I saw how much fun you were having and was happy for the rest of the day, had an emotional high during French cuz I knew you were happy and that's all that mattered.
It was end of the day and time to get on the bus. One of the busses had crashed into my grandads car, the embarrasment of the family (according to my mum) and everyone was talking abt it lol.
I talked to a year 9 who knew kally and ened up giving me a hot spot so I could text you. I heard you liked what I'd got you so I ended on a possitive note.
I did two hours studding with my mum and did an orp with you. I was a lil off then tho I'm so sorry. I'm selfish. So selfish. But I gotta tell you how I feel. I can't hold it in anymore. What I've explained here is the only thing I'll shit talk you for
But yes. I' You've had the birthday you deserve. The birthday you really deserve and it makes m e feel so happy that you've got that. You've finally seen how much you matter to people. How many friends you have. How many people like and love you and I'm so glad you've seen that. Seen the amazing person you are x
. Sorry for being a whiny bitch. In a way I almost hope you see this...
But yes for one last time happy birthday my love x
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slommyyyy · 6 years
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marvel asks!!
this is rlly long folks prepare your asses
steve: are you small or tall?
im rlly fucking short!!! bitch!!! im like five two!! hopefully i get a growth spurt soon bc bitch i dont wanna climb shit
bucky: what’s your favorite memory?
i have a bunch actually!! im gonna limit it to three bc aa theres too many,, 
SO!!! i had met viv about two months prior, and it was the summer and i was outside!! stargazing bc!! damn b its fun!! and we were texting bc ahe just woke up, and then!!!! a neighborhood cat came, and we talked abt the cat and stars and it was so nice??
anytime from when i was little at night!! stars, catching fireflies, going to the local water park, being at the beach w my mom and eating pizza, grilling hamburgers outside w my brother... mmm man i cant tell you HOW happy summer makes me?? we used to sit outside and catch fireflies and swim in an old shitty pool, and have to go inside ONLY if the amount of airplanes that flew over us was had a factor of 3, bc that number was my fav hgckygvk
fjbueod this sounds stupid bUT!! i rlly love skyping my friends?? like watching vine comps w steph and izzy, or that one time most of us all got in one MASSIVE call and micah flipped me off in front of my mom,, but anyway i had a call w my friends, and they all went out/ to sleep, and by myself, i realized?? these people make me feel so happy?? like i had been really sad for a long time and everyone just made me... good??? i watched the sun rise that morning, and i felt rlly complete man, like a new chapter of my life was starting
sam: what makes you happy?
my friends, music, and art a lot!!! also dogs in general,,
peggy: what’s your favorite era?
dude have you seen the music i listen to?? 80s/90s are my shit
thor: what’s your favorite weather?
if im outside?? warm to the point where youre sticky with sweat, but its pleasant, and dont feel like youre dying. if im inside?? summer rain!! i like the calming patter of rain and the thunder kinda just?? being there man!! watch a movie and listen to music to that jazz!!! play a ukulele or read a book!!! that weather makes me so happy
valkyrie: what’s your favorite drink?
cherry cola!! BUT!! i like the kind from those cool machines at movie theaters!! since like the canned stuff??? tastes brown w a liiiiittle bit of magenta. the bottled stuff??? more magenta but still mostly brown. the theater stuf??? hoLY SHIT!!! ITS LIKE BRIGHT PINK!!! MUTED W SOME BROWNS AND TASTES SO GOOD!!
heimdall: where do you see yourself in 5 years?
dude i cant plan the future tbh?? like maybe at college?? maybe taking time for my mental health?? idk!! also lmAO w my luck id be dead,, have you SEEN how much i get injured??? i fell off one (1) stair and broke my ankle for three weeks fsuvbeieu
korg: are you optimistic or pessimistic?
im actually realistic tbh?? i have a bad habit of looking at things from a point where its realistic to the point where its apathetic and,,, i gotta fix that man,, (also im not including my anxiety inthat bc iF I DID LMAO IDK W H A T ID BE)
peter: are you good at keeping secrets?
yeah!! unless its smth serious, then i try to get the person help from someone im POSITIVE is trustworthy, unless im positive its under control :0
ned: who is your best friend?
no!!!! no picking!!! i love all of my friends in dif ways!!! my friend cc?? my meme-y jam bud who complains abt our english teacher!! em?? fuCKIN RAD!!!! izzy?? we talk abt girls and how we love our moms!! lui?? a badass bitch!!!! kyra and jo??? my b99 buds!!! my brother was my only friend for literal years!!! id say more but this would get way too long i love all of my friends!!
michelle: do you like to go to parties?
lmaO NO IVE GOT RLLY BAD SOCIAL/GENERAL ANXIETY,, that and im never invited to any uyebve
liz: who was your high school crush?
this rlly cute girl in a few of my classes!! im too scared to talk to her thOUGH HBCEUIBS
aunt may: who or what are you most protective over?
my brother!!! holy fuck man i nearly decked some kids when i was little,,, this sounds edgy but my brother had some issues w social settings, so he was bullied, so i helped stand up for him!! we took boxing lessons for two years bitch!! got pizza on thursdays after!!.
t'challa: what is the most important thing your parents taught you?
my mom taught me to always do what i love, and i love her man,, wonderful woman,,,
shuri: are you a good driver?
bro i cant even drive and have a fear of cars
nakia: what causes are you passionate about?
a lot actually!!! rn its mostly LGBTQ+ rights, immigration, and gun control!!! i rlly enjoy arguing, but only the kind where both sides listen to each other, yknow?? bc people yelling hurts my head efvhbied
okoye: do you speak more than one language?
no,, i only speak english and have the german abilities of a two year old
m'baku: are you vegetarian?
no, sorry!! i dont eat much meat tho so i could probably go vegetarian p easily lmAO
killmonger: sunrises or sunsets?
ooo!!! i love both!! i love seeing sunrises in the morning, but i think i gotta say sunsets!! the colors are rlly pretty
peter quill: what’s your favorite song from your childhood?
my brother and i used to SCREECH hooked on a feeling its a fuckin bop
gamora: do you like to dance?
its fun but i physically??? cant?? my body doesnt know how to move so i awkwardly sway to shitty 80s music uekfbs
nebula: do you get along with your siblings?
yeah!!! my brothers one of my closest friends, and even though hes older than me,, im still shook by how old hes gotten,,,, bitches stay off the roads hes got no coordination
groot: are you quiet or talkative?
it depends on who im with!!! or how my brain is working that day!! with large groups im rlly quiet but in front of a crowd or with one to four-ish friends i know well??? ill talk your ear off,,, also sometimes my brain says!! socializing is hard so oh well
rocket: have you changed a lot since you were younger?
hdfubvyuedsvbdsiUHDBSCUI HELL YEAH!!!! dude ive developed my own opinions and gotten a lot more bitchy.... but also ive stayed the same in a few ways!! i still love art and music, and have obsessions really deeply
asgard: if you could move anywhere, where would you pick?
anywhere w my friends!!! 
brooklyn: where do you feel most at home?
outside late at night chatting w friends tbh?? it just feels right
wakanda: what is your hometown known for?
peaches!!
thank u @prcngx for tagging me!!! ily!! but you tagged a bunch of mutuals so i dont rlly have anyone to tag!!!! you monster!! ily!!
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I was trying my best, and another friend who always took pictures of us (we took pics of him as well dw) documented all of those moments, i even used a not-permanent spray color hair for that day just so the pictures could be special. I didn't particularly like myself, I never did ,but I was too busy to think about it. When i went out, i felt decent at least. Binder, thick under-eye red/black liner, just the perfect e-boy look i wanted. I felt that, as a pre-hrt person, I was looking as masc as I could while doing the style that makes me comfortable and I want to achieve. I was doing my best everytime we went out to look presentable in the pictures, and I did well 9/10 times. At some point, there was a light festival as well. I went with one friends and my cousin and we had fun. My friend and I took pictures, my cousin didn't want hers taken but we still interacted a lot and had fun, I loved the pics of that day. I never got to post them, because my downfall came soon after. At that point in time, I was finally living the dream. I posted frequently on ig (bc i went out frequently) and even though i wasn't anyone big, no partnerships or anything, not even 1k followers, I was growing, and having been intoxicated by fame at age 12, it was just what I needed. My posts started getting 70 likes on average and 7-10 comments, i only had 500 followers but they were growing at an average of 20 followers/month. A lil tween reached out to me and told me he thought I was really cool and was my fan. Bro, that was awesome. Things were moving forward, and altough i felt afraid of the future, I was working on it all. I was making progress in other aspects as well,having come out formally recently and with help from my psychologist, we were going to start looking into hrt, and i just couldn't believe it. I only have read fast and short info. I never really wanted to inform myself more because deep within me I was just afraid I'd never be able to get it and get my hopes up for nothing. We appointed a session to talk about that. This was march, and at my house, we watched a Japanese channel (because we are all interested in Japanese culture and such) So I knew the coronavirus was coming. They started talking about it since the start, in december, obviously, because they are way closer to where the virus started so it spread faster there. I remember it was on a cruise first. I knew it would eventually arrive here, so through all summer i told my mother "it's only a matter of time." I knew it'd come. March was here, and the last time i went out with my friends came along. Inside my head, I felt like I knew that was the last time. I had thoughts about "I wonder if i'll ever get to see a sight like this again". I managed to take some pictures, because,inside me, I knew that was the last time. I wanted to preserve the memory of it. I didn't want to forget. At the time, with a friend, who took the same metro line as me but lives further away, since it was just us two, when saying goodbye we'd always say "see you in five minutes" (like in endgame, because i told her the whole movie and told her when they said that and then black widow died) and she LAUGHED so hard and it became an ongoing joke between us (we are both kinda suicidal ngl but we just laugh abt it.) We said it that day as well, but we actually never saw each other again lmao
At that point, in the country, there were about 4 covid cases. Only 1 in the capital, so it had started, but was only just the start. When I got home, i kind of knew that was the last. My classes started, and for two weeks, it was hell on earth. Online,obviously. I got paired up with the guy I hated the most in the entire generation (I only knew half of them, and liked even fewer, but this guy. fuck. i would have killed him. he was awful.) Anyways. Yeah. But at the end, classes got postponed until further notice. So I was now a Neet! For a while, even though coronavirus was getting worse and worse here as everywhere, I was doing good. I was living the introvert dream, and since I have a decent/good relationship with my parents and grandma, life was just great. All around me I saw everyone struggle with quarantine. I was having a blast. Playing sims, watching anime, anything went. Shit was great. Got Gta V for free when epic released it, and had a blast. Got obsessed with obey me for a while. It was all fun.... Met via discord with my friends. Almost daily with certain friends, once in a while with others, but the whole group would be together at least once. It was good, for me. I felt good. I would ocassionally wake up and tell my mother that I was happy, and hug her. I don't think i'd ever done that. I was at peak, and I knew it. Drew a lot, played a lot. Did a lot of things and projects. Everything felt ok...My dysphoria wasn't great during these times (since now i stay in pajamas all day except when I use camara to meet with friends, and obviously I dont wear my binder with my pajamas) But i had so much free time, that I could just ignore it. (I'm good at avoiding things. at running away.)
Classes started June 1st. First day, I had a breakdown. I don't remember why, but I couldn't connect to class. I felt overwhelmed. I don't know and don't like asking for help because i feel useless when I do. So I didn't. Apparently I seemed more upset than I thought, because my dad noticed. When comforted or confronted, I always cry. I can't talk about my feelings without crying. I feel weak for expressing them. Even writing this, i feel the knot in my neck. My dad saw and ended up helping and comforting. I cried a lot. I went to class, but spent the whole 3 hours of class crying. Things were unstable for a while, but I was keeping afloat, I guess. I started feeling like shit, I wasn't happy daily anymore. Online learning felt so distant and so difficult and so different. I don't like change. At least not without expecting it beforehand. So yeah, that ended up taking a toll on my mental health. The downfall started. I was quite busy, but still tried to meet with friends via discord whenever we could. We had some online birthdays, and season 3 of osomatsu san had already been announced. I was looking forward to it so much. I was in pain, but that thought was keeping me going. I started getting worse, mentally. I started isolating myself ocasionally. I have quite long gaps from this period. I can't really recall much of what happened or what it was like. At some point around August-September I was watching 6teen, because my uni decided that starting a semester and compressing it into a trimester was a good idea, and finals were in september, i think. At the time of finals, i was watching 6teen. I didn't wanna finish it, so I started total drama after. I had a week of vacation in September as well, and I think I was OK for the week.
I won't lie. I don't remember october. I only know Osomatsu-san started here bc I waited for it all year long. I regained closer contact with a friend who lives in japan. Halloween also had an online meeting. I cosplayed, and felt good with myself for the night, for the first time in months. But I ended up having a breakdown later that night. A friend who didn't come and had said he'd come ended up arriving very late (2-3AM ish, meeting was at 10PM) He was very drunk. I don't mind. He says he just came to say sorry he didn't come bc he ended up meeting with irls. We tell him it's ok. He disconnects. He reconnects not long after, but we are confused, since that's not his voice. It was his friend who took his phone, a classic party prank. Doesn't matter, it was fun for a bit. This guy is also mad drunk, so talking to him is weird and funny. But shit gets bad for me in a bit. I was using a voice changer, as I usually do online, because Im ashamed of my high pitched voice. But this guy misgenders me, more than once, and also my friend who lives in japan. He doesn't seem to care, and I act like I don't, but it hurts so bad. My other friend who was there at that time corrects him, more than once. I felt thankful to her. I never thanked her afterwards because I didn't know how to bring out that topic without crying. This guy is very drunk though, and altough i doubt he had vile intentions because of the way he phrased it, he insists, that those are womans voices. They talk about it a bit, verbal comebacks. I wanted them to stop. At some point, my friend who lives in Japan leaves bc its lunch time for him. I felt like shit. I just told this other guy "I'm 10" and he dropped the subject, he believed me and the explanation. My friend laughed her ass out, because she thought I said it as a joke. Truth is, that was just a desperate answer to get him to drop the topic. I dont really care if he believed I was 10 or not though. I just wanted it to stop. He jokes with my friend for a bit more. I didn't talk much after, because I felt ashamed. I didn't want to talk ever again. Even now, even with the voice changer, I don't have the confidence I had when I started using it. I have lowered the pitch twice, just in case. My friend left the call a bit later. When she left, I left as well. I was thankful to her though. I don't remember if i cried or not, but it caused me a massive breakdown for about two weeks. I didn't talk online with anyone until my birthday, I think. I didn't tell anyone but my psychologist this.
I don't remember November much either. I know it's my birthday, and I know I came back to tumblr in november. Yall know when. Canon destiel and shit. Tumblr hadn't felt so alive in years. It felt like home. I remember I was having a bad breakdown during that time. I think it was career related. I can't really remember much. The shitshow happening on tumblr Destiel Election actually helped me get better. I remember this only because of a conversation I had with a friend. I started working on christmas decorations as well. December came along, I worked hard on christmas decorations. I played a bit as well, because on some of my classes I just didn't have anything to do lol. Decorations were finished two weeks in advance for christmas. For the first time ever! I was happy. During these times,Nov-Dec lockdowns started easing up a bit. I still can't go out at all though, because I live with my grandmother, so we're supposed to minimize risks. My parents only go out for shopping essentials that can't be bought online. So it's fair and I understand it, but it started becoming hard on mental health. Not because I can't go out, but because my friends start going out. They know I can't go, they don't exclude me, but they know I can't and I also know I can't. I guess in a form, its jealousy. It becomes hard because there's no one to blame. It's no one's fault. I'm not excluded on purpose, but the truth is, I don't want to hear them talk about what they do when they have fun. I've always been insecure. Even when all evidence points otherwise, I still believe, deep inside,they hate me. They wish I weren't in the group and would be better off without me. It gets hard sometimes.
Even though in general December was quite good, it also came with a major breakdown. One of my best friend's bday is in December. Up until then, Me, her, and another friend had been playing league of legends nearly daily. It was toxic sometimes (the game/community, not my friends) but we had fun. I just liked playing together. But that would come to an end as well. My friend celebrated her birthday, and did invite me, but obviously I couldn't go,and she knew this beforehand, so she didn't get mad or anything. She handled the situation very well, wrote on the gc once, and then did a special gc for birthday attendants to talk about details there and such, and reminded friends who asked in the gc to talk in the birthday gc. (this is how i knew, but i think it was well done tbh, i wish they'd just asked in the bday gc instead so i wouldn't have seen it and felt bad about how i couldn't go) My friend also offered to have me as an online guest, like, being in videocall in the computer on the table. like Karen from spongebob ig. the idea was cool, but honestly i felt bad. She celebrates her bday with her gf bc their dates are near, and I just didn't really want to inconvenience them? I mean, her gf is cool and she used to hang out with our group ocassionaly and she was cool and fit in, and it never felt awkward talking to her irl or anything but it's not like she's my friend and honestly I didn't wanna inconvenience her party, and even though I'm sure my friend wouldn't have minded, I didn't want to be an extra inconvenience for her too. I just wanted her to have fun, honestly. But feeling like a burden ended up weighing on my mind. This caused a bad bad breakdown, beforehand I had started to become better,little by little, but these two weeks waiting for that event to happen felt like a nightmare to me. I didn't tell anyone. I think i wrote it about here once. Around this time, an account on instagram called "matsunoadvice" got reccomended to me, and Oh boy Have I gone to them for advice. Of course, I sent them a message at the time, desperate for someone to talk to, because I couldn't tell anyone about this, because all my other friends know each other kinda and i didn't wanna inconvenience everyone. I didn't want anyone to know i felt like shit. I felt thankful to my friend, because she did try her best to include me, I just didn't really wanna inconvenience anyone. I guess I'd rather suffer alone myself than being a pain in the ass for someone else. After all, I've accepted that I'm alone long ago, and since now there's nothing I can do to maintain my social relationships now,I may as well just accept that theyre ending now. I kind of isolated myself for those two weeks, sometimes i would still connect on discord, but it always felt kind of distant. I stopped playing league of legends around this time.
I still hadn't confirmed to my friend if i was virtually going or not. Truth is, i kind of knew I probably wouldn't want to go in the end, bc im Like That™ But i told her in advance that i'd let her know the date of the event early in the day because of how unstable I am and I wouldn't actually be sure until the day (which was true when I told her) So the day of the event i told her that I was thankful but I wouldn't be assisting virtually and told her to have a great day! She replied okay in a nice way as she always did. I don't think she seemed weirded out by my answer. I hope she didn't feel bad, because she's very empathetic so I hope she didn't think about me at all that day. I hope she never reads this, and even if she does, she didn't really do anything wrong and handed the situation the best she could, the pain was unevitable for me due to the situation. beforehand i had also had a similar breakdown though, because 3 friends who i was/am? still very close to started meeting each other to skate together. I don't know how to skate/have never skated and obviously can't go either way, and sometimes they'd talk about it in the vc. I remained calm always until the call ended,but I did cry about it late at night. It's selfish, of course, but when no one saw anyone, it was easier. we were all the same. But now it felt like they were all moving on without me. In a way, it's what I always wanted, but I always wished to die first. I know it's not sane, but i'd imagined situations like that in my head, where I die and then everyone moved on and it made me feel calmer. But seeing that unfold before my eyes, when i'm still breathing here, i'm still here. It felt lonely. I'm glad they're having fun. I'm just upset I can't do it as well? And it makes me feel like inevitably my relationships with them will break and fall apart and dissapear and they're all still gonna be a interwined network, even though I did everything I could to maintain it because it's all I've ever had outside of my direct family? I didn't make any friends at uni or have a different group of friends so it just...hurt? It still hurts, i'm just more used to it. Also after the bday i did try to connect in vc but it just made me worse, like a friend said like "noo it got too wild honestly u didnt miss anything" and i was like lmao ok but i felt like kinda sad anyways but if i was there i wouldve probably slept through it anyways
...after i felt awful bc i have another friend who is just kinda blunt and kinda dumb when it comes to how others feel, and he was like ohh yeah but after the bday [friend] took us and some of [friends gf's friends] to our houses and since it was early we went to a mcdonalds and it was so fun !! and it was just so uncomfortable bc obviously im glad you have fun but like i dont wanna know??? bc it hurts a fuckin lot???? and my other friend who was also in vc (he was the one w the car) he was like "haha yeaaa it was fun" but he seemed quite uncomfortable talking abt it he could probably tell i didnt wanna hear and ik my other friend only did it bc he's naive not bc he had bad intentions but yeah it sucked i was like haha thats great heh.....like what ya want me to say babe
Christmas arrived and it ended up helping me a lot. Christmas is my favorite holiday and I decorated a month in advance, baked cookies for the first time (with my mom) and we just did a lot of things this year. It made me happy and kept me occupied through the pain (I know i described a lot of pain here but I only paid attention to it at night, which is why it still hurts now probably bc i've had it all repressed) And of course the gifts, honestly I didn't know what to expect because this year I didn't really know what to ask for and just asked for a surprise (because i love receiving things! anything) And my dad definetely outdid himself with all the gifts, I loved them and they're all useful too! I was amazed and i told my friends abt it and it ended up in me talking more in the vc again, and i also started playing genshin impact in late december as well. We also held a secrer santa in the group but not everyone participated (mostly bc of money) but the 4 of us that did was fun! i knew everyone's secret santa bc 2/4 asked to me for help and they were mutual </3 so i knew me and my other friend were mutual too lol but it was cool. I kinda was a bitch a bit though bc he delievered my gift to my home and was going to come a random day and I just wasn't prepared bc I was afraid of seeing him honestly I didn't want to see him and I hoped he wouldn't come? He didn't come that day but he did come some days after, I truly wasn't ready at that point anyway and my mom said we could let him inside if he sanitized, but he came with his mother and didn't get out of the car, we just exchanged the gifts, and honestly I was glad, i was polite and just said hi to both and thanks and all! Obviously i love him a lot bc we're close but idk why i didnt want him to come into my house i just feel like im so boring now and I dont know what we couldve talked abt and honestly ive always been shy but now i just forgot how to socialize and i was terrified so when he didnt get out i was just glad.....well, also
I feel like all of these incidents separated me and my friend who had her birthday on december. Now she wouldn't join the vc or gc often (or say she couldn't, which she usually did before) so I just assumed she hated me, but i didn't really have the guts to ask? She still liked my memes on the gc sometimes but not as she used to, she always used to like every single meme (or nearly all) and she never talked over me (I always get talked over except when I'm drunk bc i become a bit less shy therefore more violent) and would even call others out for me when talked over and always respected everything i told her abt me (Through the years, i've told her some of my deepest shits bc i just trust her like that i dont mind if she knows) but it just felt distant? Also a bit before that, at the start of december we started streaming on twitch, and that week i was very bad I told her i wouldn't play much bc i wasnt doing well but I was up for streaming bc i rly wanted to be professional abt it even if we dont pursue it as a career, but in the end we didnt stream, and fell out of streaming a bit after that. I was kind of afraid to ask her if she wanted to stream again, but we'd talked once and she said she'd finally gotten the cat earphones for the streams (she mentioned she wanted them beforehand) yeah anyways i dont think she actually hates hates me but idk the idea still lingers in my mind
uh yeah also i felt like shit for a bit bc i thought she definetely hated me bc we hadnt talked in a bit and she didnt like my memes anymore so i just assumed the worst, i even listened to break up music (which is what i do when a friendship ends bc altough ive never rly had strong romantic feelings for anyone that kind of song helps me move on after friend breakups too bc no one warns you abt how painful these are) and i cried obviously, but again i never mentioned it to anyone (i made a few vague textposts here though) and just got my shit together even if it hurt? lol, well a bit of time passes and everything seems to go back to normal, i dont remember how she told us but she said she had a job now which is why she didnt connect much and slept earlier and i felt relief lol bc i legit thought she hated me and i felt like shit abt it lol i mean the idea they kinda hate me lingers in my mind all the time but at that point in life i was like. SURE she hated me until that point. now we ocasionally play genshin together but i cant really talk at that time and that also makes me upset bc i do wake up late and im trying to fix my schedule a bit by waking up at 2pm instead of 5 pm but it doesnt even matter bc i play board games with my grandma daily (bc its good for her and its fun i do enjoy it) i just wish we could do it earlier bc lately she gets up at like 9pm and i end up finishing playing at 11/12/1 and its just kinda late to meet w my friends bc i always have smth to do/finish after and i just cant make it in time even if i wake up earlier? lol but i cant change her schedule so theres nothing i can do but cry about it
oh also ik matsunoadvice gave me advice on this but like there's this friend who i love obviously but sometimes he just talks abt his meetings w other friends and like it only makes me angry as fuck and i cant ask him to not bc im too shy but i wish he could stop. and also when he complains abt skate related stuff it makes me unexplainably angry but like i have no reason or right to im just angry bc i cant do that and probably never will bc i doubt ill ever be able to go out again ?? lol. and he even offered like "when we go out again u should come and ill lend u my skate and if u like it u can get one" and honestly its all super nice and i appreciate it and ive thanked him and told him yes but it just makes me feel angry inside bc i dont see an ending with all the mutations and shit and my voice cracks when i tell him haha yeah if we ever meet again bc honestly my youth is already over and i just spent it like a social recluse and i read a post here when i was younger that said like lgbt people spend their teens closeted and ashamed and live their teens in their twenties but now im gonna miss my twenties to the pandemic and then ill be too fucking old and itll be too fucking late and ill have to die and i just never lived bc i still havent even transitioned yet and i doubt ill ever be able to (this also causes me a lot of pain but i will ignore it) and the other day he said like i hope i can see u this year bc i miss u and i just said that honestly ive lost all hope of ever seeing anyone again and my voice cracked and my other friend said something related but not so related and im just glad he talked in bc i didnt rly care i just wanted to change the topic bc i know ill never see them again and eventually probably lose contact and see them all have fun together without me just as if i was dead but just didnt pass away and its difficult but i have to accept it and it hurts a lot now but in 7 years itll be fine, just like i accepted im unlovable and will never have a s/o and when i was 12 that hurt a lot but now it doesnt so someday i will be alone but i hope it doesnt hurt anymore.
this is all a mess and the format is everywhere and theres no timeline i hope no one reads it. if u do read it im sorry. i just honestly been carrying all of this for a while now and i want it out of my system honestly bc i dont know what to do with it and i was on the verge of a breakdown for a minimal thing hours ago i just want all this info out of my brain.....also obv these are only the bad things that have happened/good things that took me out of the hole but a lot of good things happened too lol and i skipped a lot of imp points like i changed careers and shit and also i met a lot of cool mutuals since i got back to tumblr and ososan been carrying my mental health every monday but yeah i just wanted the negatives out of the system. the frustrations and the anger. i hope no one reads this fr its so messy
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kxlebcross · 4 years
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multiples of three, please.
oh man i cant believe ur making me do maths at 4:18 am... but here goes nothing! (it’s gonna be long so i put it under a read more)
3. Ever done any drugs? uhhhh... yeah, for a short period yrs ago i had a friend group and with them we smoked weed pretty much every weekend... they did some hard drugs too but i never dared trying those cuz im a lil bitch lmao aaaaand i don’t do that anymore, it’s an expensive hobby to have and i usually waste my drugs money on pc games and ordering food srgsdfg
6. Describe your dream home. probs somewhere in a big city, close to the center because i love being a big city kid.... a mid-sized flat with lots of plants and those neat cat playgrounds mounted on the wall because i plan on having at least 4 cats in the future asdsd and i’d love to have a bigger balcony which i could transform into a little jungle and hand a hammock there and just chill and listen to the city’s noises at night when i can’t sleep
9. Do you watch porn? you may not believe but i actually don’t sdgsdfg the horny teen phase is over for me, if i wanna interact with anything pornographic i just read fanfiction dfgsdfgsf
12. What’s one of your fantasies? i hope it’s not supposed to be an erotic one lmao but i really wanna go on a road trip through europe, just pack up my shit and drive around, also i wanna visit haunted places all around england and get into the gaming business as a game translator/tester eventually
15. Are you in a relationship? thank god not anymore... and honestly i don’t miss it anymore, all of my previous ones were disasters and ended in a really ugly manner so.. no, i’m all good with my cat
18. What tattoos do you want? i don’t have specific plans for motives - though i’d really like a kitsune mask somewhere and a moon and one song quote. i’d like to have my whole left sleeve done, maybe part of my back, a half sleeve on my right hand and something smaller on my ankle - and i’m actually open to anything the tattooists would pick out; i care more about who’s gonna create my tattoo than what’s it gonna be, as my actually existing 2 tattoos r also premade, randomly picked out ones (though they accidentally matched up in some way and look pretty neat imo)
21. Describe your best friend. that’s a hard one.... i don’t think i have one anymore. i used to have this girl in my life, M, who i was really close to, but we had a fallout in october and she never came around to fix this even though i was open to the idea... so i lost my best friend, which is kinda sad considering that she was the only person i could open up to in the last 3 yrs. but hey that happens! i moved on and have a close friend still so im all good.
24. What are three places you want to travel? i really wanna visit scotland! it has this specific atmosphere i really long to experience, and i wanna see the landmarks and grassy fields and loch ness and haunted places and just roam around there for a while. i also wanna see moscow - it’s been sort of an obsession of mine since reading glukhovsky’s metro series, and also it’s a beautiful city worth visiting. i’d also like to get on the trans-siberian express but that’s not a specific place dsfsgdf the last place would be the aokigahara forest in japan - also one of the places i feel drawn to for ages now. found out about it years ago and since it’s been sort of a plan of mine to visit one time. if i manage to graduate university my mum promised to send me on a trip to japan - so if it works out, ill be on my way there baby! (i just need to work on my language skills first sasdfgf)
27. What’s your pet peeve? loud breathing, loud chewing... generally people being loud and annoying. ppl not covering their mouths while coughing. ppl who walk super slowly and take up all of the walkway like FUCK OFF OF MY WAY GODDAMMIT. in games when the npc walks a lot slower than ur running, but walking a lot faster than ur walking so its impossible to keep up with them. ppl not using headphones in public spaces. old ppl demanding respect when they treat u like shit. ppl forcing their religion on u (im looking at u auntie). ppl slurping their drinks. couples almost f*cking each other in public places... just get a room smh
30. Tag someone you want to talk to but have been too shy to message. oh i don’t need to tag them cuz i already got over that shyness and they totes know already that i wanted to talk to them for a while! (i admitted to it in the tackiest, cheesiest, most awkward anon ask i ever sent in to anyone sdfgsdf)
33. If money was no object, what would your wardrobe be like? pretty much the same as now, all black and flannels and jeans, cuz i rly thing that major clothes shopping sprees r a waste of money sdfdf but i’d probably own a lot lot more shoes like custom made cat patterned vans and some more nikes and some creepers cuz i wanted to get some of those for like yrs now dfgdfg
36. Do you still have feelings for any of your exes? uhhhh... kind of? not romantic ones tho, i just miss the long talks and the trust and understanding between us. i never got the closure i needed to move on and it still left some bad feelings towards her so its a weird mix of resentment and sympathy, and i try to not think abt it too much.
39. Are you a virgin? hahahahahahahahah, no, really. 
42. Describe the hottest person you know. the hottest person i personally know is one of the ppl i used to be on my universitys e-sport team on with dfasd i always had a weak spot for ppl taller than me and hes literally model material with nice cheekbones and the perfect jawline and the best sense of humor ever. though he’s a widowmaker main in overwatch and thats a big big minus for him :(
45. What’s the worst date you’ve ever been on? lmaooooo thats a funny one listen up... so i was fresh out of breakup and wanted to make some friends.... wait for it.... ON TINDER. i live in an university town so i was like kewl imma make some ppl my age (until then all of my friends were A LOT older than me) and have some friends and if romance happens then it happens, w/e. so i set up this bar night with this one guy, i believe his name was David? so David and i meet up for drinks, i grab a gintonic and we sit down to talk... what he never knew abt me is that i am on the adhd spectrum and i have to get my hands busy with smth so i can focus on what im saying otherwise my thoughs r all over the place. so im casually keeping my hands busy with just spinning my locked phone there and back, or just  messing around with the lime slice on my glass and at a random moment David goes like “u know.... i hate when ppl cant stop messing around with their phone” and im like ????? dude im literally just spinning it, not even messaging anyone or unlocking it or shit. and he goes on this rant that he always expects ppl to pay full attention to him when talking, looking at him (i never look ppl in the eyes cuz i tend to just go into panic mode from long eye contact and also i think its creepy to just stare at someone constantly) and just not doing anything else except paying attention to him so i go on explaining to him that i need to keep myself busy and im not doing it to annoy him - but he keeps on insisting so i excuse myself to a cigarette (he also hated smokers lmao) and call the widowmaker main friend from the previous question and am like “hey man i have the worst date of my life can u be at this place in 40 minutes and then we hit the night life” and hes like fine so i go back to David and tell him “sorry mate i just remembered i have my last bus home in 30 minutes and the next one is in 1,5 hrs and i really cant stay out that late so can we wrap this up and schedule an other meeting some other time” and hes like fine... got me to the bus stop, i sat on the bus.... got off at the next bus stop, met up with widowmaker main guy and went out for drinks and decided to never go on tinder dates again sdfgsdfg
48. Describe your ideal partner. thats a hard one, hey! but i dont think i have an ideal, guess ill work with anyone whos a decent human being who wont require me to be the housemaid and cook and clean and do everything for them. oh and they totally need to know how to use a washing machine... one of my exes was incapable of this (and here i was thinking that in 2018 ppl saw a washing machine already... looks like i was wrong and im still not over that incident 2 yrs ago). oh and they gotta be fine with the idea of never having kids cuz theres no way im putting myself through raising one of those, im a man of career and money, totally not responsible enough to raise another living human being sdsdgdf
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zairehyun-blog · 7 years
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can you do all of the ask things? 🙈
OH GOD 
1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?
mic drop - btstraining wheels - melanie martinez drive - halseydo i wanna know - arctic monkeysnicotine - panic! at the disco ready for it - taylor swift 
bonus: forever - exo, earned it - the weeknd, & cherry bomb - nct 127
2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?
fhgjfkjhgf maybe my mom
3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.
answered
4: What do you think about most?
answered
5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?
from my twin and it says “I FUCKING SWEAR SQUISHY YAWNED”
6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?
ok it depends here. it depends on how cold it is and if my boyfriend is willing to share his shirt but normally no
7: What’s your strangest talent?
i’m like really flexible for no reason??? 
8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)
answered 
9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?
i’ve had my sister’s stalker write a poem abt me akfjdhskl 
10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?
answered
11: Do you have any strange phobias?
no lol 
12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?
Wh- who does that-
13: What’s your religion?
answered
14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?
trying to go back inside no but probably taking pictures of the sky to show my dad lmao
15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?
answered
16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?
fdhsfjk between exo or bts
17: What was the last lie you told?
i told my dads that my sister was the one who broke a lamp ASFJSD
18: Do you believe in karma?
answered
19: What does your URL mean?
answered
20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?
i talk abt my twin a lot but, being away from her literally drains me of my energy, and i’m not sure abt my greatest strength lmao
21: Who is your celebrity crush?
this mAN
22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
answered
23: How do you vent your anger?
i write it down or i tell someone im really close too
24: Do you have a collection of anything?
of very long sweaters lol
25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?
it depends,,, im a really talkative person so i guess both
26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?
Kinda, I’m still learning who I am, so I can’t answer this yet. 
27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?
answered
28: What’s your biggest “what if”?
answered
29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?
tHIS HOUSE IS FUCKiNg haunted no one tell me otherwise and, i do because how can we be the only species in the entire galaxy?? it doesn’t make sense
30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.
I touch my boyfriend and he looked at me like “what the fuck are you doing” asghsjf i also touched a pillow
31: Smell the air. What do you smell?
answered (still cologne) 
32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?
fcuckIng school
33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?
I love both :(((
34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?
fdhjfkdfh i don’t know lmao
35: To you, what is the meaning of life?
mansae - matthew 2k17
36: Define Art.
the way he looks at me
37: Do you believe in luck?
Yeah
38: What’s the weather like right now?
Perfect tbqh
39: What time is it?
8:40 pm
40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?
Yes and no
41: What was the last book you read?
Alice in wonderland
42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?
ADJFHSDjfk i don’t like it but i also don’t hate it
43: Do you have any nicknames?
Zaza, Z & then my korean name (which I won’t state.)
44: What was the last film you saw?
“IT”
45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?
I broke my pinky and now it can bend in weird ways
46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?
YeS GHJDSKF
47: Do you have any obsessions right now?
I’ve been getting into more animes and I’m getting back into cosplay lmao
48: What’s your sexual orientation?
answered
49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?
answered
50: Do you believe in magic?
yes i am a magical little bean
51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?
it depends on how wrong the thing they did was lmao
52: What is your astrological sign?
Pisces
53: Do you save money or spend it?
I save it and then I spend it on other people HAHA
54: What’s the last thing you purchased?
i bought myself a promise ring (for smth personal agfhkjsf)
55: Love or lust?
love
56: In a relationship?
to my lovely baby (’:
57: How many relationships have you had?
2 but if you count this one then 3
58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?
no
59: Where were you yesterday?
at school & i went out to dinner C:
60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?
yes 
61: Are you wearing socks right now?
no
62: What’s your favourite animal?
🦄
63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?
tbh my hair or my charm lmAo
64: Where is your best friend?
She’s in Seoul >:c
65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.
answered
66: What is your heritage?
Korean, Japanese & Arabian
67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?
eating
68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?
Satan is his last name his first name is Lucifer
69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?
answered
70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?
Yes, honestly. That’s what I aspired to be, to be what my younger self needed.
71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?
ILL SAVE THAT FUCKING DOG LIKE IM ABOUT TO DIE FUCK MY JOB. IM NOT LETTING A DOG DIE
72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?
I’m not sure if I answer all of these so I will
A, I would but I wouldn’t because I wouldn’t want anyone hurt but I know that they would be hurt even more if I didn’t say anything so ??? 
B, I would spend it with people I love 
C, Yes. 
73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.
ASFJHDS love.
74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?
DIAMOND BY EXO AKSFDSJK
75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?
answered
76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?
trust & communication
77: How can I win your heart?
^^
78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?
We’re all a little mad.
79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?
saying i love you
80: What size shoes do you wear?
11
81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?
“we’ll love again we’ll laugh again and it’s better off this way”
82: What is your favourite word?
adventure idk why
83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.
well i think of andi but i also think abt him.
84: What is a saying you say a lot?
“FATHER SUE HIM/HER/THEM”
85: What’s the last song you listened to?
mic drop
86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?
pastel colours & black and purple
87: What is your current desktop picture?
my twin, her fiance, my nephew, my boyfriend, my parents & myself lol
88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?
my sister’s stalker
89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?
I’m not sure lmao
90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?
I’d would be like “how thE FUCK DID YOU GET HERE, and u can stay if u want just don’t be a dick.” then i’d let them stay and i’d be the real mummy of the groUP IM SORRY
91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?
FLYING/TELEPORTATION
92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
When I said i love you
93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
what she did to me that night akfjhgjfdks
94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?
,,,baekhyun,,,,
95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
BACK TO OSAKA TO SEE MY FAMILY 
96: Do you have any relatives in jail?
my uncle
97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?
no
98: Ever been on a plane?
yes
99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?
answered but that i still love my boyfriend 🌷
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gnxsora · 7 years
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Ya’ll what is this pic!! anyway Hello!! I’m cupcake (cause I love cupcakes wowee AND IM BACK WITH THE SAME CHARACTER LOL HMU also i TURNED 18 BEFORE THE REVAMP I FEEL OLD OMD) my timezone is GMT ( bigup uk amright) I’m 18  and this is my angry smol bab Sora! She’s a 19 year old firefighter and she is beefy af!! I’ve got some more info + connections under the cut!! LIKE THIS AND ILL ZOOM INTO UR IM’S OK!! (also this got long pls forgive me) warnings: tw death, fire, ptsd, alcoholism IM SO GLAD TO BE BACK THIS HAS BEEN ONE OF MY FAV RPS EVER ASDFGHJKL; edit: lmao im reposting cause i had a lowkey existential crisis if i had muse 4 this chara but fheLL YES I DO SO pls find more info abt sora under the cut nd like this if u want me to come holla at u
Basically from the very beginning she’s been reckless. That kid who would jump from the top of the jungle bars and hang upside down on random railings. Always curious never really one to be hurt by bruises etc. Point is, she always picked herself up!
Grew up to two loving but kinda harsh parents (mum’s a nurse + dad works an office job)  + 2 twin brothers. It’s all going well until she’s about 14/15 and her parents become really strict on her because she’s failing in almost all her subjects.
This isn’t cause she isn’t smart or anything but she’s just lazy and unmotivated. Instead, she just spends most of her time exploring Seoul and climbing random buildings with her mates. Now this behaviour continues on and on, she stays out later and later (nb. She doesn’t do drugs/smoke/have sex ( lol she’s lowkey vulnerable and isn’t really that rebellious as she acts) , she only really drinks and shoplifts) Till one day when she’s 16 and she comes home late, she’s supposed to be babysitting her two brothers (who are 10) but she goes out instead.  her dad is at an office workparty (it’s around about Christmas) and her mum’s doing a night shift. There’s a firetruck and a crowd of people. She doesn’t even think about it, she just runs inside.  She runs up the stairs and screams for her brothers, she finds one of them unconscious in the bathroom, but she can’t find the other one. She takes him outside, but it’s already too late. Turns out her other brother managed to escape through a window. It’s only then that the pain kicks in & Sora passes out. (Turns out she has major burns all over her lower back)
Flashforward to a year later and her parents have basically disowned her and see her as the reason her younger bro died. She only really talks to her other younger sibling now & is an alcoholic. Lowkey she’s really emo, but instead of going out and having fun she just gets drunk by herself instead.
It’s then that her two best friends (COUGH THIS IS TOTALLY OPEN TO PLOTTING PLS) give her an intervention and tell her to make something of herself and afterwards she realises she can’t keep living her life like this. So, after seeing a counciller about her PTSD + grief and gaining JUST about good enough grades she decides to confront her past and become a firefighter to save lives like she couldn’t save her brothers but she’s lowkey still angry emo + bitter + still suffers from seeing images of her bro :( Training is tough but after 7 months she finally passes and she moves out of her parents house
personality wise she can be quiet and aggressive like, think angry stares and harsh looks but underneath it all she’s just soft tbhjust broken nd haunted u feel??? If you’re an idol/rich/ceo/anyone with reasonable success she’ll probably dislike you cause she’s bitter af and a highkey socialist lmAO she’s so extra #beef but at the same time it’s all a front and she’s vulnerable and honestly still grieving (she still see’s her brother and hears his voice)
BUT IF SHE LIKES YOU SHE WILL PROTECT YOU LIKE A TRUE M0M FRIEND EXCEPT YOU’LL PROBABLY END UP TAKING CARE OF HER CAUSE SHE’S OBSESSED WITH HER JOB OK.
Plots I need:
her best friends – always known her and gave her an intervention when she needed it
that 1 boy who pisses her off to kno end and shE HATES THEM!!!! or lowkey likes them who knows shes weird
childhood friend – they moved away or changed school maybe??
the little sister/brother – she’s taken them under her wing and has adopted THEM
THEY TEACH HER ABOUT ART OR AESTHETICS OR INDIE FILMS OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT BECAUSE SHE DOESN’T UNDERSTAND IT
someone who deals with her extraness lol
SHARES HER APARTMENT WITH THEM?? PLS
makes her food cause she gets hungry af
listens to her rants and when she’s upset
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