#i'm guessing he built his house himself but he couldn't have built a kitchen or a bedroom OR A BATHROOM??? MY GUY

[vanillashusband]

I'm not sure how I forgot this but I honestly can't believe that wukong's house is literally just a single roomed shack with one couch, a tv, two coffee tables, and a laptop. I am not exaggerating! MY MAN DOESN'T EVEN HAVE A BED OR A KITCHEN?? yeah... he needs me. 100% he needs me. I have no idea how he survived this long on only chips and take out hfhdgvd

[vegeta-bananabluish]

Ten days to full bloom (Secret Santa fic)

Title: Ten Days to Full bloom Author: Bananabluish Gift for: The lovely Aevy WC: ~2200 Summary: Under the cherry blossom trees, painting the land in powdery pinks and whites, Goku discovers what it means to be in love with his newly-wed wife, Chi-Chi. AO3 Link: Here

Ten days to full bloom

Goku and ChiChi stood hand in hand, gazing out at the breathtaking view from their new home on Mount Paozu. The cherry blossom trees surrounding their land painted the landscape in hues of powdery pinks and whites, casting an atmosphere that looked so dreamily serene, that it verged on magical. Chichi's lavender cheongsam beautifully blended into the colors of the landscape, in contrast to Goku's appearance. Looking down at his signature orange gi, adorned with hooks and tears here and there, made him feel like he stood out like a sore thumb. He was brought back into reality when Chichi absentmindedly plucked a small twig from his hair—remnants of his sparring session with Krillin earlier in the morning, and Goku felt an unwelcome surge of heat in his neck.

Turning slightly to hide his blush, his gaze naturally fell upon their new home, built next to the flank of a tall mountain. A spring breeze persisting for days, had blown an abundance of flower petals into their yard, blanketing the grass in a fluffy layer of pink. According to Chichi, the cherry blossoms would paint the view from their kitchen every year from now on, as the month of March turned into April. Having shared the same roof for just a few days, Goku found himself already captivated by the depth of Chichi's knowledge on things that had never even crossed his mind before.  Goku slightly turned to her, trying to catch the murmurs slipping from her lips over the rustling leaves. He gathered she was saying something about how this view was the perfect setting for the beginning of their new life together. Goku understood the words but didn't quite grasp what Chichi was actually saying. In fact, the whole concept of 'marriage' still left him bewildered, despite his participation in the wedding. He glanced down at their intertwined hands with a puzzled expression, uncertain why she had insisted on this gesture. Did this also come with 'marriage'? He now knew that 'husband' and 'wife' were supposed to have physical contact in the bedroom, but did this also extend throughout the day?

Suddenly, the voracious growl of a beast rumbled from his stomach, ruthlessly shattering the tranquility that had embraced the moment. Goku's cheeks reddened again as he apologetically rubbed the back of his head. “Oops, guess I'm getting hungry again, Chichi.”

Chichi frowned—she was still full from their heavy lunch, and the dishes weren't even dry yet. Goku seemed like a bottomless pit when it came to food, which burdened her with a lot of extra work, but she could never suppress a smile whenever Goku showed unease around his infinite hunger. “It's time to start dinner then.” Chichi seemed to relish the quiet stroll back home in the shared silence between them. Goku felt the need to say or do something, but had no idea what husbands were supposed to express to their wives in such moments as these. A little later, Goku effortlessly stacked a few sizable wooden crates on each other, his muscles flexing with the ease of a man who dedicated all his time to his training. Chichi observing from the doorway while the pots simmered behind her, couldn't help but worry, despite her inability to take her eyes off his bare muscular arms. She shook her head to dispel the indecent thoughts clouding her mind. "Goku, be careful! Those boxes are heavy, and I don't want you breaking my mother’s china," she admonished.

With a nonchalant grin, Goku assured her, "Don't worry, Chichi. I've lifted much heavier things during training." He was well aware that Chichi was likely just as capable of carrying everything into the house, but she had emphasized that it was more fitting for it to be a 'husband's job. Goku, in his typical fashion, gladly seized every opportunity with both hands to break a sweat.  Wondering if Goku even knew what 'china' was, Chichi turned around with a huff, carrying a heap of towels inside. She could no longer tolerate looking at his careless conduct. Nevertheless, she was pleased her new husband was able to bring everything inside quickly. They had spent the past few days with the absolute bare minimum— getting by with just a bed and some kitchenware, because the remote location of their home had been challenging for the moving truck to reach. It didn’t take long before they had brought most of the belongings inside as Goku didn’t possess anything other than the shirt on his back and the boots on his feet. There was only some kitchen furniture left standing in the grass. While carrying their new dining chairs inside, Chichi gracefully managed two chairs stacked upon each other, and Goku haphazardly handled the rest. Peering around the mountain of furniture, he stole a glance at his new wife. He couldn’t ignore the warmth growing inside of him whenever he looked at her. The sensation resembled ki-generation whenever he powered up for battle, but it seemed more concentrated in his chest. The first time he experienced this feeling was an hour before what everybody had called ‘the ceremony’. In the white wedding dress, her radiance was akin to the silver twinkle on a stream’s surface... or a flock of white doves catching flight... or like the sweetest whipped cream he ever tasted. Seeing her like that tickled his insides in all sorts of funny ways and ever since he had tried to pinpoint exactly what it was about. He noticed it especially when she looked directly at him, and her large brown eyes radiated a warmth that reminded him of afternoon sun on freshly upturned soil. In the following days, as they settled into their new home, Goku carried this puzzle with him, determined to keep trying to figure it out. It was during one particular quiet evening that Goku was hit hard by this new and unfamiliar feeling. In the soft glow of the sun drooping into the horizon, Goku and Chichi found themselves sitting on their porch, surrounded by the delicate fragrance of cherry blossoms. It surprised Goku that although he wasn’t particularly fond of flora, he now paid attention to how the orange light tinted the blossom petals. Goku's eyes lingered on Chichi's profile as she spoke about her day, explaining where she had found the herbs she had incorporated into their last meal, detailing her explorations of the surroundings.

Even though Goku had exceptionally enjoyed her culinary skills—he had inhaled everything set out on the table in a matter of seconds, her words completely faded away in the presence of her beauty. That peculiar feeling suddenly hit him again, striking him like a bolt of lightning this time, and he blinked in surprise.

"Chichi, I... I think I'm feeling something strange," Goku admitted, his tone of voice just as confused as his expression.

Chichi turned to him. "What do you mean, Goku?"

"I don't know. It's like my heart is doing something funny when I'm around you.” Goku scratched his head, trying to make sense of these newfound emotions again. “Is that normal?"

Chichi chuckled, her laughter striking him right in the chest. "Goku, that sounds a lot like love. It's what married couples feel for one another, if all is well.

“Love?” Goku pondered the word, letting it roll off his tongue. He didn't know much about the love between a man and a woman, except for what he’d seen on Master Roshi’s television, but judging by the impractical clothing the ladies wore, that source of information didn't seem so reliable either. So far, the whole concept had been far outside of his world. That is, until recently. Could he have fallen into it without even realizing it? His eyes slid inquisitively over her features, willing her to elaborate. But she kept her mouth shut. Why did she often talk when he didn't care for it, but when he wanted her to speak, she remained tight-lipped? There was a certain gleam in her eyes that he wasn't used to seeing from her though. When getting into bed that evening, they engaged in that one thing they had done almost every night since their wedding. Whenever they shed their clothes and lay down on the mattress, it was almost as if Goku’s instincts seamlessly took over. His gaze, as though he was on the battlefield, focused on her with intensity. But instead of defeating her in martial arts, all he wanted was to feel her, kiss her, taste her, everywhere. To feel and be inside her. In the last few days, he had begun to grasp what he needed to do to bring out more of the delicious sounds she would make whenever he solely focused on her. With each added night of such intimate entanglements, he found himself drawn to her in more ways he didn't quite comprehend. He began noticing the subtle details—the way her hair fell whenever she turned her head, the softness of her touch whenever she plucked a fluff off his back, and the warmth of her smile whenever he joined her in the same room. She didn't laugh so often, but when she did, his day inexplicably brightened. Exactly ten days after their wedding, Chichihad convinced him to join her again in the orchard. She had told him that the Japanese cherry blossom tree bloomed for only two weeks, and she wanted to seize every opportunity to enjoy it. Despite Goku’s initial resistance—he was reluctant to interrupt his training, he harbored some curiosity about what she had in store for him.

They walked along a low-hanging tree, and Chichi reached out to pluck a small branch with flowers. She tucked it into her hair, behind her ears, and Goku found it strange that while he still didn’t particularly care for flowers, he found that this specific bloom complemented her beauty so well. He came to the realization that he wouldn't want to change anything about her. 

As they strolled through their yard, and into the treeline, Goku absorbed the serene beauty of his wife and of the landscape, noting that even though by far most flowers had opened, there were still a few buds waiting to burst into full bloom. It suddenly struck him—just like these blossoms, his heart was in the process of opening up to Chichi, revealing layers he hadn't known were even there.

Goku abruptly halted mid-step. Sensing his absence next to her, Chichi pivoted, expecting her husband had dart off, perhaps in pursuit of another bird like last week. She spotted him standing still behind her, a different expression on his face than his usual sunny demeanor. As Goku approached her, a sudden breeze caused the cherry blossoms to rain down around them like confetti and Goku couldn't contain his feelings any longer. "Chichi, I think I've figured it out. I... I love you," Goku confessed. His eyes, for once, did not reflect his usual childlike enthusiasm but instead pooled with sincerity.

Chichi’s eyes widened before she broke out in that specific radiant smile he craved to coax out of her. "Goku, I love you too." She lifted her arms to cradle his head in her hands, flattening a few black strands with her fingertips, and gazed deep into his eyes for a moment. The moment froze in time and without the need for words, they both sensed that everything was just right. After blowing a falling pink petal from his brow, Chichi kissed her husband. As he felt her lips on his, the warm ball in his chest sprang to life again, this time expanding into a warm mixture of warmth and nervousness throughout his entire torso. Goku wrapped his arms around her waist, feeling the lean muscle beneath his fingertips through her dress. Being more confident that Chichi was experiencing the same kind of strange sensations he felt for her, he deepened the kiss, pulling her tighter against him. His body spontaneously came alive with her proximity up to the point that his heart tried to break through his ribs.

Before the wedding, he had thought marriage was a new type of exotic dish—or maybe something gross Bulma had cooked up in her lab. But it wasn't until ten days after their wedding day that he truly understood what it was all about: Chichi vowed to always be there for him, and he realized how incredibly lucky he was that someone wanted to spend a lifetime with him. This woman was even prepared to feed his perpetually hungry stomach to the point of satisfaction, no matter how difficult a task that proved to be. However, as their lives had further intertwined, Goku realized it was not about satisfying his stomach but his heart. 

As the last few gold-orange streaks in the sky dissipated into the night, they embraced onto a tapestry of fallen petals, making Goku feel like he was part of something secret and special, a new chapter of his life beginning. As if guided by an unseen force, their embrace effortlessly moved into something more. When they made love under the canopy of pastel pink that night, the moon cast its spell over the orchard, their shadows dancing with the blossoms, creating a ballet of love that was almost surreal.

[japhan2024]

Then do it

This story is set during the Inbetween years

kink: threesome

word count: 1.568

themes: angst, choking

"Are you seriously 'we saw you from across the bar'-ring me?" Ian laughed but he couldn't help but feel a burning inside of him, which he had rarely felt before.

Ian carried as many cardboard boxes as he could. Courtney and Shayne helped him and stuffed it all in his Chevvy. The two blonde colleagues went back inside to get more. The few moments alone, Ian peeked a glance over the ironclad wall he'd built around his feelings. He shuddered at what he saw and retreated fast. He leaned against his car and glanced again at the message he'd received: "Defy has gone bankrupt, your contract has been terminated, in effect immediately."

Ian was not alone. But he FELT alone. Because the one person who would understand what he was going through right now, wasn't there. Courtney and Shayne returned with more old props and valuable trinkets from the Defy offices.

"Let's get the hell out of here."

Suddenly, Ian felt himself squished between his two sobbing friends.

"Ian, you're so strong, I don't know how we will continue now…"

"We're going to get through this."

"What's going to happen now?"

"We'll figure it out. I'll figure it out, don't worry. It's a rough day today, but it'll work out, I promise."

They hugged him tighter. Ian didn't know how to feel. He didn't WANT to be the one in charge, but there wasn't anyone else.

A few months passed.

Courtney and Shayne were at Ian's house having dinner together, thinking of ideas for videos. Courtney wore hot pink short shorts and Shayne wore khaki shorts. Courtney a yellow crop-top and Shayne a green vest. Ian wore an old Smosh T-shirt and baggy jeans. They sat huddled around the dinner table. Ian looked up from his plate to see Courtney looking misty-eyed. And to his dismay, Shayne looked the same. Were they also going to leave Ian, just like - but Courtney spoke, and said:

"Ian, you're so good to us, how can we ever thank you for keeping Smosh alive, keeping us, housed and fed basically, and keeping us from going totally insane with stress. You're working so hard, don't think we don't see it. You're amazing, Ian…"

"Uhh, thanks?" Ian joked. But Shayne go up from the table.

"Ian, you have no idea, my life has been so crazy, and the only constant has been Smosh. I've been so scared, Ian, so scared to lose this. But your confidence and determination really kept me sane."

"Guys, you warm my heart."

Courtney also got up from her seat.

"Ian, we also have something to tell you."

Adrenaline shot through Ian's body. Were they just saying nice things because they were going to leave again?

"We've fallen in love with each other, and, we're dating."

Ian's otherwise stoic brows shot up and he laughed in relief.

"Guys, that's great! I'm so happy for you."

Courtney fidgeted a bit. Shayne took a step towards Ian and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Ian, we.. we are also in love with… with you. With your heart and soul. And we were wondering… if you'd want to try to hook up with us? It could be fun! Hilarious even, or… just really nice?"

"Are you seriously 'we saw you from across the bar'-ring me?" Ian laughed but he couldn't help but feel a burning inside of him, which he had rarely felt before.

"I guess we are," Courtney laughed apologetically. "But, are you into it?"

Ian finally also stood up and walked towards his window. He pensively looked at the pink sky. Shayne and Courtney followed him and stood on each side of him.

"I think this needs a whole lotta alcohol, for a start, and also, what? I would have never guessed it from you, BOTH of you, like, that you liked each other and also me? That's crazy dude."

Ian walked away from them again, into his kitchen. He found some bottles of hard liquor, and decided they didn't need shot glasses, they would just drink from the bottle. When he came back into the room, Shayne and Courtney stood there waiting for him in suggestive poses: Courtney with her legs wide open, draped over one of the armchairs that stood there. Shayne stood behind them, twirling their hair around his finger, some of the buttons on his vest already open… Ian just put the bottles on the table and looked at them. They were both really beautiful, he would admit that much. And it was not- it was not the same. But a different kind of feeling wanted, feeling appreciated, kind of eased some of Ian's mind. He would still not think about his deeper, inner feelings though, oh no. But this was nice.

They played charades for a while, drinking and laughing. The charades were becoming more and more filled with innuendos. They sat down on Ian's couch and began to watch a movie. But nobody paid the screen any attention. Shayne and Courtney both had their arms around Ian, and the other hands were on his thighs. Caressing, squeezing softly. Ian already felt a light buzz form the booze. His eyesight started to blur and he began to give in to the lust that was building and building inside of him.

Ian decided to kiss Courtney first. He held her face firmly and slowly got closer, kissing her, her soft lips, their warm tongue, Ian went deep in there, and she moaned, but he held on tightly. When he released her, she jumped on top of him, crop top pulled over their head. Ian one-handedly undid her bra and immediately squeezed her bare breasts with the other. But Ian now wanted more. He unzipped her pants and slid them down. She stood up for him. He hungrily pulled down her panties but before he could do anything else, Shayne pulled her to him, turning her around and placing them on his lap. He'd pulled his cock out already and she now slid onto it with her ass, whimpering profanities.

Ian stood up from the couch, his dick hard and smooth skinned. While Courtney was being fucked by Shayne, Ian put his dong in their mouth. He thrusted into her throat, making them moan even more.

He locked eyes with Shayne. Shayne didn't look like his usual zany self. He looked very vulnerable, showing himself fully to Ian. His blue eyes still asking, asking for more. Ian came in Courtney's mouth. Shayne let her off his dick and walked up to Ian. He kissed him. Way more forceful than the kiss with Courtney, this was on another level. Ian was still seeing stars from his orgasm but got extra butterflies from this amazing kiss. Shayne completely dominated his mouth, Ian didn't stand a chance.

"Why don't you get comfortable on your hands and knees, you can do so on the couch," Shayne said. Ian just did it. Courtney sat down next to him, so his head was at her tits' level. He took her nipples in his mouth one by one. On his other side, he felt Shayne undress him, squeeze him hard and put something smooth inside his ass. "It's just a dildo," Shayne reassured him.

Courtney's boobs combined with the feeling in his ass, turned Ian hard again already. But Shayne took the dildo out now, and entered Ian himself. That was another matter entirely. Shayne was very big. Ian breathed hard, face squished into Courtney's chest, while she caressed his hair and placed kisses on his head.

"Fuck.."

"Ian, I've always dreamed of doing this…"

"Then do it!"

Shayne thrusted into Ian with a desperate intensity. He grunted and panted, as Ian grunted and panted as well. Ian's eyes shot up in pleasure. Shayne began to speed up and Ian wasn't sure whether his rectum could handle it. But it did. With each thrust, Ian squeezed Courtney's thigh really hard, making her moan as well. Ian slid his fingers inside Courtneys vagina. He played around with all the textures he felt inside of her.

"Oh god, Ian please, yes," she begged. But Ian was getting pounded too hard to be able to fully commit.

"Ian, I'm going to come…" Shayne exclaimed.

"Do it!" Ian commanded. Shayne immediately came inside Ian, shooting his sperm into his body. Panting, he exited Ian and sat back on the couch. Ian immediately jumped on top of Courtney and began to fuck her, pushing her all the way down on the couch.

"Choke me, daddy," she joked but not really. He grabbed their throat and squeezed slightly. That was enough to make her scream in pleasure. He pumped and pumped inside of her and came again, his turn to shoot his sperm into her. He let go of her throat. "Oh god Ian, this is incredible…" she panted.

Shayne got onto his knees, and went down on Courtney. Seeing the two of them go at it, was a very pretty sight. Ian rubbed his still wet cock while watching them. Courtney screamed as they came, grabbing hold of Ian's leg and shivering all over. Her nipples were rock hard. Ian licked and sucked on them some more.

"Let's go clean up," Ian suggested. They all went into the shower.

"That was amazing," Courtney said.

"Yes, that was the hottest sex I've ever had," Shayne chimed in.

"I guess it was alright," Ian joked but then added "no it really was nice. Will we be doing this again?"

"I hope so," they both said. They went back to the couch and watched the movie which was still playing.

[professionallydeadinside]

H*CK YEAH, HOUSE LORE!

Okay, so the house was build back in the early 1800s (I'm a sucker for Victorian houses, sue me) and was built by a guy for his soon-to-be fiance. However, unfortunately, the woman died to tuberculosis, and as a result, he died of a broken heart, and he unfortunately killed himself in the basement of the house. (Yes, he is the thing in the basement. He's chilling, tbh.) He had bought the whole acreage of land that was being sold, which racks up to about almost 10 whole acres. Multiple families, companies, and hotel owners try to own the land and whatnot, but unfortunately weird stuff started to happen anytime they tried to take down the house or try to refurbish it more than just fixing it up enough to be livable. People were saying that I was cursed, that it was destined to be abandoned, that nobody would live there, and everybody in the town was surprised when you bought it. They even had almost like a bet going on and how long you would last, and only the innkeeper down the very long driveway on the other side of the road want it by saying that you were going to stick it out and be there for a while. but even then, you've stayed there for a lot longer than people thought and they genuinely think that you are not leaving, and that some kids think that you might be a witch or consorting with something. The town is pretty small, maybe at biggest 900 people, and that's only a guess. On your property is a huge swatch of the woods that seem to surround the town, and that's where the more dangerous being seem to be. Your whole entire property is like super duper haunted. The house itself is a basic Victorian layout, living room, dining room, and kitchen are all downstairs. The basement is obviously underground, and there are two bedrooms and two bathrooms upstairs. There's also an attic that you keep hearing things in, but you don't exactly know what it is sometimes it sounds like high heels, sometimes it sounds like just people walking about, sometimes it even sounds like animals are walking up there. The whole house has been newly renovated, but they unfortunately couldn't take down any walls because most of the walls were load-bearing, so every room is still pretty closed off. You've put in your own bits and pieces of your life in there, obviously, but you also have bits and pieces for everyone who's come forward and talk to you. So you have various '80s memorabilia for Yati, you have some furniture or accessories or decor from the 20s and 30s for me, you even have some punk memorabilia lying around for Silas. You even still have the original painting of the original owners wife hanging up in the entryway so he can look at her when he comes up, who isn't often.

You go all out during holidays, but especially Halloween, since you have the room. (Have you possibly leaned into the rumors of you being a witch or consorting with something that you shouldn't for halloween? ...Perhaps. Did Silas and Yati and I help you with that by being as creepy as possible when kids came to the door that believed in it? ...Maybe.)

Every so often Silas, myself, and Yati seem to almost say a different name when talking to you, then we freeze, look confused, and call you Axis, you know, your actual name. ...right?

-Kirk anon

SORRY I WAS MAKING DINNER BUT FUCKKKK I LOVE THE HOUSE BEING VICTORIAN BUT HAVING LITTLE THINGS THAT GO WITH THE GHOSTS.........

[theboysfromaustin]

July 10, 1963

Shirley leaned out the window of her red Studebaker Speedster, watching her girlfriend Maureen talk to a neatly dressed young man - she guessed he was sort of cute, but she wasn't into men.  She was holding a box, and the man looked very shy.  Maureen patted the man on the shoulder, both of them waving to each other as Maureen headed for the car, getting in, a grin on her face.  "Who's the guy?" "Ian, new lawyer, sweet little man." "He looks like he's six feet tall." "You know what I mean." "What's in the box?" "Manchester tart.  He made it.  It looks amazing." 

Shirley cocked a brow, "Oh my god, is he hitting on you?!" "Ian?" Maureen made a dismissive gesture, "No!  He knocked me over accidentally the other day, and made a dessert from his hometown to apologize.  Besides, he's gay." "He told you?!" "No!  I can tell, though.  He's sweet." "Maureen," Shirley gave her a warning glance, "Don't get attached to the wildlife." "I love him.  I'm adopting him." "Can you adopt a mid-twenties gay lawyer baby?" "I can try."

Shirley put the car into drive, "Are you going to tell him about us?" "Not yet.  Probably not until he's comfortable enough to come out to me.  I don't want him to feel forced." "That's probably for the best.  You don't want to put the man in danger." "That's what worries me," Maureen bit her lip, "I mean, we're lesbians, and this is Texas, no matter how liberal Austin may be, but he's gay, and gay men bear the brunt of the aggression, usually…"

Shirley was quiet for a moment, "What's he like?" "Sweet.  Very sweet.  I hope being an attorney doesn't beat that out of him.  Has a small firm more in the downtown area, was filing for his first case when he ran into me.  Literally.  Extremely apologetic, helped me to my feet.  And you know that there are a lot of people who would have walked away or gotten mad." Shirley's gaze darkened, "Lot of bad people in the world.  At least this Ian guy seems nice."

"That's why I want to adopt him.  He needs friends.  And it wouldn't hurt to have a good attorney on our side." They crossed under the newly-built Interstate 35 into Austin's east side.  After a few minutes, they pulled into their carport, Maureen carrying the box as they exited.  "What's in that?" "Looks like coconut, cherry, custard…" "Alright, the man's won me over."  Maureen laughed, gently bumping Shirley with her shoulder, 

"Let's break into this."

—--

In his apartment, Ian cleaned his kitchen, up to his elbows in soapy water, black hair hanging over his eyes.  His transistor radio played softly nearby.  He hoped Maureen liked the tart.  It was nice to cook for someone other than himself.  He genuinely liked Maureen, and he knew he'd be seeing a lot of her at the courthouse.

He wondered if she had a family - she was at least fifteen years older than he was.  His mind wandered, to his paralegal, Kensuke.  His family, his wife Yukiko and their new baby, Nanami.

Ian wondered if he'd ever have a family.

He leaned back, sighing, shaking the bubbles off his arms and began to rinse his cookware.  No, families weren't for people like him.  He knew he couldn't mask himself and bluff his way to the American dream.  He could have a partner, maybe…if they hid their intentions from the world, but children?  Unlikely.  Which was a shame, because he would love to be a father.

Every time he got to hold Kensuke's girl, his heart swelled with love, even if he wasn't terribly sure how to hold a baby.

People like him weren't allowed to have children.

He blinked back tears, finished the dishes, and dried his hands.  He went into his bedroom, flopping face-first onto the blankets.  Maybe, one day, things would be better.  He'd bought the small house his firm was in outright.  Next, he wanted a house of his own.  And a nicer car.  Right now, he was driving a 1940 Ford Deluxe.  He'd like an Aston Martin, or maybe a Rolls-Royce.

More than that, though, he wanted someone to love.

—--

Shirley climbed into bed next to Maureen, resting her head on the other woman's shoulder, "That man certainly can bake." "He's going to be a great husband one day." "Bold of you to assume people like us will ever be treated like people." "Such a cynic." "A realist." Maureen gently cuffed her on the shoulder, before kissing her.

"Mmm, I love you." "Love you more." "Um, Maureen…" Shirley looked nervous, "This Ian kid…do you think he'd accept me for….me?" Maureen immediately stroked her cheek, "He definitely would.  We may have to explain some things, but he's a good man." Shirley leaned into the caress, "Would be nice to have another person I could trust.  I mean, I have you, and your brother…that's it.  My family…"

"They don't know the person they're missing."

"I can understand my parents, but I'd hoped my brother and sisters…"

"Maybe someday they'll come around.  I wish we could see Francis more, but I know May is…a problem…" Shirley's face flushed red, "Yeah…the small digs about my looks and voice are bad enough, I'm just glad she doesn't know my birth name…can't use it against me…" "Francis taught her better.  He told me.  I wish he lived closer, but I know she'd follow him." "Yeah…" "I'll introduce you to Ian, but we won't tell him about us.  Not until he's ready to come out." "Thanks, babe," she kissed her partner, cuddling as close as possible, "We should invite our new son out to eat." "Hut's?" "Ah, you're just easily enchanted by a good cheeseburger."

"You know me too well." "And I love you." "I love you, too," Maureen took Shirley's face in her hands, squeezing her cheeks, "You're a good person.  Don't let anyone ever convince you that you're not." "I won't.  Also, question?" "Yes?" "Did we eat that entire tart?" "Yeah." "Damn.  We need a recipe." "I'll ask him.  You're going to love him.  He sounds very refined and stately, but he's clearly very down-to-earth." "What's a clumsy Brit doing all the way out here?" "I dunno.  We should ask."

—--

Ian sat up in bed, deep in thought, before getting up and beginning to cook for himself.  He enjoyed cooking.  It kept him busy, and if he could make friends happy by doing it, well…

That made it worthwhile.

[the-letter-horror-lover]

Continued Kushina lives fanfiction. Doesn't belong to me. Chapter 19

I'm not the type of person who would reveal private moments, Hinata. I'm sorry if you were looking to get gossip straight from the source," he answered sternly.

"What? No! T…that… I… it… w…wasn't—" she stammered.

Naruto let out a good-natured laugh as they arrived at Shikamaru's house. "I'm just messing with you, Hinata. You're really close to my mother. She wrote me while I was gone. Did you know that?"

Hinata shook her head in real surprise and confusion at where the conversation had gone.

"She wanted a daughter. Not instead of me, but along with me. My father was excited about having a son, but my mother wanted a larger family than just a single child. They never discussed it before he died, but Kushina-sensei was planning to have four kids. You probably didn't know that either. Anyway, she looks at you like a daughter and she told me so much about you while I was gone that I sort of think of you as a sister. I know we aren't really that close, but it feels like I know you from all of the letters," Naruto explained.

'…I'm like his sister. I guess I know how Kiba feels when he whines about being "friend-zoned" now,' Hinata lamented internally. "I… didn't know. I think that I need to find Kushina-sensei. Do you think that Shikamaru wanted me along?" Hinata asked.

"I'm not sure, but whatever it is I'm sure I can handle it. Go find Kushina-sensei," Naruto replied as he knocked on the door.

Shikamaru opened the door, looked around, and then motioned for Naruto to enter. The house was an older style with a large forest behind it. The inside was a combination of modern furniture and antique family heirlooms. The kitchen was completely modern, rather than the pre-industrial style of some of the antiques.

Someone was at the round kitchen table wearing a long cloak with a hood that covered the person's face and head. Naruto smelled desert, but Shikamaru had just come from a diplomatic mission to Sand. Pieces began to fall into place as Naruto scrutinized the figure in the Nara kitchen.

"Oh, shit. Please tell me that Temari isn't in your kitchen," Naruto said, his face blanching visibly.

"That's pretty close to what my mother said," Shikamaru answered. Naruto noticed that Shikamaru hadn't denied it.

"What the hell, Temari?" the newly minted jonin asked, barely above a whisper.

Temari pulled the hood down. She no longer wore a forehead protector. Her eyes were bloodshot and had bags under them. "I couldn't stay there," she intoned. "I followed Shikamaru when he left and snuck into his house last night."

"This is going to cause an international incident. This is a shit-storm waiting to break. Baki is going to be pissed. And your council! Holy shit, they are going to go nuts. And what about Kankuro? Is he just going to sit on his ass while you disappear? This has to be the dumbest idea any ninja has had in at least the last ten years," Naruto paced as he listed everything without taking a breath.

"Kankuro and Baki know that I left. But Shikamaru didn't know I—" Temari tried explaining while Shikamaru let a sliver of guilt show on his face before getting himself under control. Temari stopped her explanation as anger slowly built. "You knew I was following you?" she accused.

Shikamaru looked away while replying, "I know what you smell like. I thought you were just shadowing us out of the Land of Wind, but then you followed all the way here. By the time we arrived, it was night and I couldn't let you sleep in the cold."

"You… MAN!" she accused in mock anger as she hugged Shikamaru. 'I will never understand women. I know this with absolute certainty. I have no idea what the hell just happened. Is she mad at him? Why is she hugging him? Fuck it. I have no idea what's going on here,' Naruto thought as he watched.

"Okay. So Baki and Kankuro know you're here. Will they be able to cover for your disappearance with Sand?" Naruto asked, hoping to break up the foreign scene in the Nara kitchen.

Temari nodded returning to her chair while Shikamaru leaned against a counter.

"Great. So you just avoid being a ninja and everything will be fine," Naruto commented as he realized that they wouldn't need his help if that was their plan. "Fuck. You have something else in mind, don't you?"

Temari nodded again. "I don't want to just retire. I was thinking that I might take up teaching and maybe Shikamaru and I could get closer. Besides, it's not like I have the skills to open a shop or something. "

Naruto let out a string of expletives that would make Anko blush before sighing. "As if I didn't have enough on my plate already…" Naruto finished.

"So you won't help then?" Shikamaru asked, slightly dejected.

"No. Of course, I'll help you. We're still friends and Temari is like a sister. But let me tell you everything else that I have to worry about because you are helping me with at least some of it," Naruto replied with a smile.

—An hour later—

"A group of S-ranked missing-nins are harvesting the bijuu, one of which you carry. You are trying to expose a secret organization in the Leaf run by Danzo Shimura. Rock wants you dead because of your father. Jiraiya pimped you out to some minor matriarchal village. You want to become Hokage and save the world from war and hate. Is that an accurate summary?" Shikamaru asked.

"You left out preventing an international incident caused by a high-ranking Sand-nin defecting to the Leaf, fixing whatever's wrong with Sasuke, and altering the Caged Bird Seal so that it doesn't come with a kill-switch," Naruto responded.

"I'm never going to get to watch the clouds ever again, am I?" Shikamaru sighed, his head lightly slamming into his arms against the counter.

"I don't fight the battles that I know I can win; I fight the battles that need fighting. I'm not going to give up because the odds appear against me," Naruto said with determination. "Nobody ever changed the world by giving up before even starting."

Shikamaru shook his head, but understood the sentiment. Temari whispered something in the despondent teen's ear, causing him to shift uncomfortably and blush slightly. "Let's get these done then," Shikamaru announced with uncharacteristic determination as he took a seat at the table.

"Itachi seems like the key to Root. You need to learn about chakra transfer so that you can help him break his seal. Your mother can inform that minor village that Jiraiya had no authority to arrange a marriage or whatever. You've spent years thinking about Akatsuki, so I doubt I can add anything in a few minutes. I have a solution to Temari living here, but I'm not sure either of us is really ready for it," Shikamaru listed.

"I'm not a fuinjutsu expert, but between you and Jiraiya, I'm sure you can come up with something to fix the Caged Bird Seal. You're going to need the Yamanaka clan to help with Sasuke, but that might be premature with several of those other things hanging over you," he continued thoughtfully.

Naruto was amazed at how quickly Shikamaru came up with solutions after Temari whispered something. He almost asked before realizing that he didn't want to know how she did it. "We might be able to convince Sand to do a teacher exchange program," Naruto added thoughtfully. "We send Iruka-sensei to Sand to teach and Temari stays here. What do you think?"

"That might work for the short term," Shikamaru replied. "It kicks the problem down the road, I suppose."

"It's better than trying to work out some kind of marriage deal," he said knowingly. "I'm not sure that the Nara clan has enough prestige to keep the Sand elders from kicking up a major fuss, but I'm also not an expert in the inner workings there. Temari?" Naruto turned to the road-weary blonde girl.

"Lazy-ass is right about us not being ready to get married. I like him and he certainly seems to like me, but marriage is a huge deal and we're not even twenty," she finally opined. "But you're right about the Nara clan not being a big enough clan for the elders. Even if we did get married, I'm pretty sure that the elders would make a fuss about insisting we stay in Sand."

"Well… if it came down to it, I could roll you into the Uzumaki clan. My mother is the clan head," Naruto suggested hesitantly.

Temari widened her eyes. "You're one of THOSE Uzumakis?" Naruto nodded. "Does anyone else know?"

"Not outside of the Leaf village," he replied sullenly.

Shikamaru frowned. "What do you mean, 'THOSE Uzumakis'?"

Temari began to lecture: "Before the Second Great Ninja War, there was a Village Hidden in the Whirling Tides. The Uzumaki clan was the most famous clan of the village and they were widely feared throughout the five nations, as much as the Senju or Uchiha. But Rock and Cloud sent an annihilation force to Whirlpool toward the end of the Second Great Ninja War, seemingly obliterating the Uzumaki clan and the ninjas of the Land of Whirlpools. No ninjas were supposed to have survived," Temari explained.

"Why was this not taught at the Academy?" Shikamaru asked, frustrated at not knowing something.

"I would guess because the surviving ninja from Tides were mostly in the Leaf and they didn't want what happened to the Whirlpool happening to the Leaf. Disappearing into the Leaf was safer than trying to seek attention as the best seal-masters in the nations," Naruto supposed.

"Honestly, the only reason I know is that my mother was born in the Land of Whirlpools, in the Village Hidden in the Whirling Tides. She didn't move to the Leaf until she was old enough to go to the Academy. By the time Whirlpool was annihilated, nobody knew that my mother was the grandniece of Mito Uzumaki, widow of the First Hokage."

Shikamaru smiled. "You already knew that you could solve my problem and used it to get me to help you with your other problems, didn't you?"

Naruto let out a nervous laugh, "I guess you caught me, even though that's a last resort. But you know that I can't do all of that other stuff alone and my mother has been trying to get you into the fold for over a year."

'So THAT'S why Lady Kushina has been trying to get me into ANBU!' the lazy boy thought. "I'll tell Kushina that I'm joining ANBU," Shikamaru said with a resigned sigh. "I'll need the extra training."

Naruto shook his head. "It's too late to join ANBU. Akatsuki has already started moving," he glanced sadly at Temari. "I don't mean that you can't help or that you shouldn't improve yourself, but joining ANBU is no longer a viable option because it would sideline you for a year." Realizing that Shikamaru didn't know that ANBU training was no longer six months, he explained, "ANBU's training program got a severe boost when Kushina-sensei took over. We're getting off track though."

"Let's see if the teacher exchange will play before we get to any marriage proposals. I think that we can all agree that the Uzumaki clan would stand a better chance of succeeding than the Nara clan on that front and if we try more than one clan doing the same thing, it'll anger the Sand elders," Shikamaru summarized. "We'll talk with Kushina about getting me into a harder training regimen and you'll work on chakra transfers. Maybe the Toads can help."

"Let's go see the Hokage and sort some of this out then," Naruto said, standing.

—A darkened room in the Village Hidden in the Rain—

"Zetsu, report your findings on the kyuubi jinchuuriki," a man with spikey blonde hair, eyes that contained several concentric circles, and metal rods piercing his face ordered.

A half-black, half-white man with a fly-trap for a collar nearly hissed, "He forced Deidara to self-destruct. Deidara did not prepare as you suggested. The idiot created a variation of his clay that would detonate with lightning chakra, but that was all. The jinchuuriki used space-time ninjutsu as well as S-ranked lightning jutsu and his control and integration of the ninjutsu into fighting appeared seamless.

"I recommend Tobi and Lord Pain team up to capture him while Kisame and Kakuzu screen and isolate him from his allies. Itachi told the Leaf everything he knew, but Sasori and Deidara were still able to infiltrate Sand, so they may not have passed along their information to the other villages. We should still assume the worst as we go after the rest of the bijuu," the strange man finished.

"You are certain that the kyuubi is that dangerous?" the man with strange eyes asked, but was met with only a stoic face and a slight nod from the plant-man.

"Very well," he resolved. "We shall capture the other bijuu as quickly as possible before… Someone is trying to infiltrate this place."

"Lord Pain?" Zetsu questioned.

"I will deal with the threat. Relay our conversation to Tobi and the others. Capture the other bijuu quickly," the man said as he and five others with the same eyes and metal piercings moved down the building interior.

Chapter 20

"You probably aren't going to like this, Aunt Tsunade," Naruto said woefully, examining the scroll in front of the Hokage's desk. "We worked out the kinks in this seal about a month ago but I never thought that he'd use it so soon."

"What is it?" a toad with a white goatee and plenty of wrinkles asked.

"Tell me how he died first," Naruto responded.

"He was in the Village Hidden in the Rain, attempting to infiltrate Akatsuki headquarters. He was discovered by their leader, a person called Pain. Jiraiya held them off until he could summon me and Ma, but even with our combined efforts, Jiraiya couldn't beat all six Pains. They kept coming back," the toad explained. "He used the last of his strength to put chakra into that scroll, but one of those Pains launched a rocket at us. I dove into the water one way, but I saw Jiraiya sinking to the bottom in another direction."

Naruto thought briefly, gripping the scroll, before saying, "Bring Kushina and Kakashi before opening that scroll, Aunt Tsunade. Fukasaku, could you summon only those toads who were close to Jiraiya. I know that you all were close, but only the closest. This office is small."

Tsunade called Shizune and had her send summons before turning to Naruto. "What's in the scroll, Naruto?"

Naruto looked at her, knowing that despite his lecherous behavior, Jiraiya had only ever loved her, and that she didn't return his feelings. "That seal is similar to part of my own seal in some ways," he explained, patting his stomach. "Bear with me. Just after Sasuke woke up from his breakdown, I asked Jiraiya about what he would say to you if he knew he would die. Jiraiya responded that it was something between the two of you and that he wouldn't tell anyone else.

"After using shadow clones for so long, I figured out some of the idiosyncrasies and technicalities. They are basically solid chakra constructs imbued with the original's mind. When we were studying storage seals and explosive seals, I noticed that they essentially sealed chakra into a scroll.

"It was then that we revisited the discussion we'd had about what he'd say to you if he knew he would die. I asked him if it was possible to seal a shadow clone into a scroll. He didn't know and we spent a while trying to work it out together before we figured out how to do it.

"That scroll contains the last remnants of Jiraiya's mind and chakra in the form of a shadow clone. He prepared it because he knew he wouldn't return from whatever mission he went on. He made it for you."

The air was still and silent for many long moments before Tsunade choked out, "How long will the clone last?"

"I don't know. As long as it has chakra and nobody dispels it is the best answer I can give you," Naruto explained. "But the real, original Jiraiya is dead, so the clone won't have anywhere to dispel. It'll start to fade as the chakra runs down rather than instantly vanish with a puff of smoke. It'll fight to stay with us for as long as it can. But its lifespan is limited to how much chakra is in the seal. We'll be watching him die."

Tsunade's hands trembled holding the scroll. Her mind was in turmoil. Jiraiya made sure that their last words wouldn't be that half-drunk bet they'd made as he walked out of the village.

Kushina and Kakashi arrived with Shizune. The Hokage's office felt cramped with Naruto, Tsunade, Kushina, Kakashi, Shizune, Fukasaku, and an older female toad named Shima. Gamabunta was outside the office, peering in through the window.

Tsunade looked at everyone once the door was closed. She wasn't sure what to say. She looked at Naruto. "How do I…?"

"It's just like a blood-sealed message scroll. It's sealed so that only certain people can open it. It's just like a storage scroll, so just put some chakra in and he'll come out of the scroll," Naruto said, barely holding himself together.

Tsunade nicked her thumb with a kunai before swiping it across the scroll. She opened it on the floor, revealing the complex seal matrix imprinted on the scroll. She looked up at everyone assembled. 'I know that he would want to see everyone in this room one last time,' she morbidly thought, unsealing the contents.

Jiraiya blinked, looking around the room. "Too bad this isn't the hot springs," he croaked, with half a smile.

"Jiraiya…" Tsunade trailed, fighting back angry tears.

"I knew that I might not make it back, Tsunade. Nobody lives forever."

Tsunade looked at the man's shadow clone with a mixture of rage and sorrow. This would be her last conversation with Jiraiya. Ever.

"The leader of Akatsuki is one of those kids I trained back in the war," Jiraiya finally said. "I'm pretty sure the one behind it is named 'Nagato'. I don't know everything about what he's done, but the real one is using some technique to simultaneously control six bodies and each body has a single powerful jutsu that it can perform. I didn't see them all, but one has machine parts like rockets and bombs. One can summon. One can absorb chakra. I nearly beat them, but I guess one can restore the other bodies. Or maybe the original can. Or both.

"You should get more information out of the body I managed to capture, if it didn't get summoned or fight its way out."

"Shizune… did you get all of that?" the Fifth Hokage asked. The dark-haired woman nodded in response after her pencil finished moving over a notepad.

"Lord Fukasaku, please take Naruto to Mount Myoboku and train him in the sage arts. Tsunade, you should know that you'll inherit my entire estate, with the exception of certain rights regarding my books. Kushina, I wrote some letters, years ago, that are for you and Naruto. Contact my publisher for the details. Kakashi, bring me your best quality copies so I can autograph them," Jiraiya hurried.

"Bunta! It has been an honor and a privilege to fight with you for all of these years! Lord Fukasaku and Lady Shima, you were my family when I had none," he finished quickly. "Hugs for everyone!" he shouted, hugging everyone in turn.

Fukasaku grabbed Naruto, asking, "When do you want to begin your training, Naruto?"

Kushina turned to the toad. "Akatsuki is on the move. We no longer have time to waste. Go. Now," she ordered as she turned back to the man who had spent the last sixteen years trying to redeem himself for what only he had seen as a failure.

Naruto felt two toads jump up to his shoulders and then he went through a summoning vortex, appearing in a strange jungle at the foot of a mountain.

"Welcome to Mount Myoboku, Naruto. We're going to be training in the sage arts here," Fukasaku said, smiling.

—The Land of Lightning, a few miles outside the Village Hidden in the Clouds—

A dark-skinned man with a white chest-plate rhymed, "Don't you know? This is the Land of Lightning, yo!"

"Oh, great. The shit-talking octopus is here," a man with slicked-back, grey hair complained. "I fucking told you that we were making too big a goddamn scene."

"Just do your job!" the masked figure rumbled, already engaged in combat with a blonde woman who was covered in deep-blue chakra. "I'll handle the woman."

"Hey now, Matatabi! One of us has to get free!" the dark-skinned man shouted as a tentacle sped from his back into the masked figure. "And warn the other jinchuuriki!"

The grey-haired man rushed at the dark-skinned man, his three-bladed scythe held high, and attacked with ferocity and viciousness that the dark-skinned man hadn't encountered since the Third Great Ninja War.

'I'm too exhausted to continue the fight, but I won't abandon a friend,' the woman thought.

Seeing the conflict in the woman, the dark-skinned man yelled, "I'm not messing around, Yugito! You have to escape!" without rhyming from behind the clash of blades.

"Bee!" Yugito screamed as the last of her tenant's chakra thinned away. 'He didn't even rhyme! DAMMIT, BEE!'

"This is not a discussion! You escape or we both die. Don't make me regret coming here. Now, GO!" Kira Bee screamed as he whirled with seven blades held all over his body.

Yugito charged with all of the speed the great Two-tailed Cat could lend her back to the Village Hidden in the Clouds, hoping that she could at least provide some information to her home. The Raikage, Kira Bee's own brother, would be furious. But his fury paled in comparison to how angry the woman was at herself.

—The Village Hidden in the Leaves—

"Jiraiya… I'm sorry," Tsunade said once the two were alone in the Hokage's office.

"For what?" he said with a half-hearted smile. He could feel that he only had an hour or two left before he faded; just enough time to watch the sun set one last time. "I don't want to spend my last minutes in regret. Call it a last request and humor me?"

Tsunade looked at the man. It was only now, in their twilight, when it was far too late, that she realized what she should have done years ago. That she was wrong to discard him. That she could have been happy with him. Maybe, if she'd tried harder after Dan died, she might have been able to spend time with him. Maybe, if she'd tried to look past his glaring defects. Maybe…

But that wasn't how their story would end, she knew. Their story wasn't a comedy, where the heroes got together and lived happily ever after. Their story wasn't a daring adventure where the man and the woman overcame obstacles and found love in each other's arms. Their story didn't have a happy ending. Their story was a tragedy and she found out too late that she didn't like the way it ended; she didn't like it at all.

"Tsu-chan?" Jiraiya asked. "Would you… I mean, if you don't mind… Would you watch the sunset with me? Please… I-I don't want to be alone…" he finished almost desperately.

The story of Jiraiya and Tsunade would end as he faded, smiling contently, while the sun dipped below the horizon, leaving a blazing trail of fire across the sky, and she cried alone in the dark on top of her grandfather's carved face, regretting every mean thing she'd ever said to him.

—Uzumaki Apartment—

"You KNOW how I feel about him!" Hinata screamed in an outburst that would never happen anywhere close to a public place. "You've always KNOWN! Dammit!"

Kushina sighed. Hinata was still furious that Naruto thought of her as a sister. "I've given you advice about men before: they are stupid. You have to make things obvious," Kushina explained.

"But you sabotaged me! And now he's with Ino or Hana or one of the others!" Hinata raged.

"Hinata, how many men have you been with?" Kushina prodded.

"Those were missions! Those don't count!" the dark-haired girl fumed, uncharacteristically emotional.

"And that time with Kiba?" Kushina asked, causing Hinata to blush.

"No one was supposed to know about that!" Hinata burst, her face red.

"I didn't become head of ANBU because of my pretty face, Hinata. So you had sex with Kiba even though you don't love him. Do you think that you are the only woman to have sex with someone because she got lonely?" Kushina cooed. "Sometimes, you need more than a battery-operated friend and a good book."

Hinata paled.

Kushina laughed. "Did you think that you'd figured out some great secret relaxation technique? Women have been doing that since before their 'friends' were battery operated."

"This is about Naruto, not a history of porn. Could you at least pretend to care?" Hinata grumbled.

"Hinata, Naruto is my son. I would have been happy if he could have stayed my baby forever," she paused, thinking, 'At least I kept him from graduating early. A dozen years has to have been enough… There is no more time,' before continuing. "But that's just not how the world works. Naruto is an adult and he'll choose his own woman. I will respect him and I'll have to be happy with whoever she is, no matter what," Kushina lectured. "And if you truly care about him, so will you."

"But…" Hinata started before Kushina interrupted.

"No. Don't get mad if you lose without trying. You haven't even begun to try, so stop acting like a child," Kushina finished sternly, her voice the implacable head of ANBU rather than the jovial matron.

"… What if he rejects me?" Hinata whispered low enough that Kushina couldn't hear.

"I have to arrange a sealing chamber for when Naruto returns. He thinks that he'll be able to harmonize his chakra after he finishes training with the Toads."

"He's only been gone for a day…" Hinata said in wonder.

"You know how he trains. He wants to break Itachi's seal," Kushina said as she finished her tea. "And he isn't giving up just because the situation looks bleak."

"I'm not giving up," Hinata said, finally regaining her composure.

Before Hinata could work her confidence up any more, someone knocked on the door. Kushina answered to find Cat, an ANBU operative with long, purple hair and long swords on her back, supporting a very drunk Tsunade, whose arm was wrapped around Cat's shoulder.

"Bring her in," Kushina sighed. Tsunade only got drunk twice a year: on her brother's birthday and on Dan's birthday. The woman drank often, but she only got completely hammered on those days.

Cat dragged Tsunade inside to the couch as Kushina closed the door behind the pair. Hinata looked concerned for the Hokage. "What happened?" she asked.

Cat finished covertly checking the apartment before Yugao removed her mask. "She drank. Heavily," Yugao responded. "I found her passed out next to a nearly empty barrel of sake on top of the monument. She kept mumbling about how she wouldn't let anyone else make the mistakes she made."

Tsunade's hand shot out, grabbing a shocked Hinata's arm and dragging the teen to within an inch of Tsunade's face. "Don't. Wait. Y'unnersan? Yuh can't jus' waitaround. If summon loves you… Love. Them. Back," she managed before she started sobbing and curled into a ball on the couch.

"Leave," Kushina commanded. Both younger women vanished from the apartment as if they'd teleported, leaving only a swirl of leaves and a swinging door in their wake. Kushina closed the door and windows, activating the complex security and privacy seals that she'd installed over the past two years for handling delicate ANBU matters at home.

No one else would know that the Hokage broke down. No one would know that she cried in Kushina's lap for hours, like a child. No one would know that while comforting Tsunade, Kushina was crying too. "They still need us," Kushina finally whispered.

Both women had finally stopped crying, but their eyes were still red and their breathing uneven. "Who?" the older woman asked.

"Everyone, Lady Tsunade. Everyone needs us," Kushina replied, wiping her eyes and smiling. "Everyone in the village. Everyone in our lives. Nothing stops because we lose one person. You know that we can't afford that. Do you remember his first book?"

Tsunade nodded dumbly. She remembered that Jiraiya had written a book that wasn't smut long ago.

"Tales of a Gutsy Ninja was the title. It was his best book. Do you know what the lesson of the book was?" Kushina asked, already knowing the answer.

Tsunade croaked out, "No."

"Never give up," Kushina answered. "I know that he was the last of your peers, the last of your friends, still alive. But you can't give up yet. Look at what we've done in the last three years. Look at what we've accomplished."

"No," Tsunade firmly stated. "You're right. Nawaki wouldn't want me to give up. Dan wouldn't want me to give up. And Jiraiya…" She smiled. "Jiraiya would want me to show him my tits after not giving up."

Kushina smiled. "Did I ever tell you about the time Jiraiya 'accidentally' peeped on me with Minato?"

"You don't talk about Minato," Tsunade replied.

"Ah. Well. Minato was bugging Jiraiya about training ideas. This was after Minato had made jonin, but before he had his own team. Anyway, Jiraiya told Minato that he would help him with some seals, but only after he got some inspiration for one of the first Icha Icha books. Of course, Jiraiya wanted to look at naked women, so he dragged Minato to the hot springs, according to Minato.

"I still think that he went voluntarily, but he swore up and down that Jiraiya had forced him. Anyway, I was taking in a hot bath with Mikoto and some of the other jonin women when I smelled Minato. We'd been dating for a while and I recognized his scent.

"I didn't know he was peeking with Jiraiya, so I got up, fully nude, and walked over to the fence. Because who tells the women not to peek at the men?" Kushina said with a foxy grin. "So I snuck over to the fence and lifted myself up only to see Jiraiya and Minato ogling at everyone through some holes they'd managed to find in the fence!

"I reached out and pulled Minato over and started to beat him and yell about him and his perverted sensei in front of everyone, which was when everyone else figured out that Jiraiya was peeking on them. I was so mad at Minato for looking at other women that I'd forgotten that I was completely naked and that Jiraiya was watching the whole thing until the other women jumped the fence and started beating Jiraiya."

Kushina paused. "If you've read any of the Icha Icha series, you might recognize that scene. Of course, in Jiraiya's book, it ended a little bit differently than what happened at the hot spring that day."

Tsunade couldn't help but laugh at the story. It was just so… Jiraiya.

—Hyuuga Compound—

"Why aren't you preparing for the jonin examination?" Hiashi Hyuuga asked his eldest daughter.

"I am going to Mount Myoboku to find Naruto," Hinata answered politely, continuing to pack.

Hiashi stood thinking for several minutes before responding. "Why?"

Hinata mentally sighed. 'I love you, Father, but sometimes you can be quite dense.' Hinata turned to face her father, face set in determination. "Because I don't want to live the rest of my life not knowing."

Hiashi frowned. 'There are occasions when I see the wisdom in putting the Caged Bird Seal on your children…' The man looked down at his daughter and melted inside. "I suppose there isn't anything I could say or do to stop you is there?" he asked in the icy tone he always used.

Hinata shook her head. "I'm going to see Lady Hokage and Lady Fox as soon as I finish packing. I intend to make the journey as quickly as possible. Life is short, after all."

"I will not interfere on two conditions," the patriarch replied. "First, I want your classified ANBU file. And second, I want you to take a bodyguard."

Hinata narrowed her eyes at her father. 'I expected something like this, but to so brazenly ask for that information…' "Father, you know that those files are classified for a reason. Ask the Hokage or break into ANBU headquarters like everyone else. And a bodyguard would only slow me down."

"Very well. I will accompany you to the Hokage where I will read your file and then I will accompany you to Mount Myoboku. Hanabi and Neji will handle clan matters in my absence," Hiashi commanded. "You don't think that your father and clan head will slow you down, do you?"

Hinata sighed. 'At least he didn't order a branch member to accompany me…'

—Deep Underground—

The dark permeated everything, revealing only the single eye of Danzo Shimura. He didn't move when he spoke. "You must harvest a new pair of eyes. Sasuke must return to active duty soon."

"Yes, Sir," one of the masked figures responded before fading back into the darkness.

'That fool woman thinks that medical jutsus will bring strength to the village. I will show her true strength. Then the jonin will recognize that she is weak. Feh. It should have been Orochimaru. He understood true strength.'

—Mount Myoboku—

A crack rang out down the mountain and a blonde teenager screamed, "Ow!"

"Stop messing up and I'll stop hitting you, boy!" the elder toad shouted.

"If the stick clears out nature energy, then why do you only have the one stick?" Naruto shouted back.

"There are plenty of sticks, but there's only one of me!" Fukasaku shouted again.

"Then you need to learn the shadow clone jutsu!" Naruto retorted.

"That doesn't matter. Too many clones will lead to you overloading on nature chakra and turning into a statue!" Fukasaku yelled.

"Dammit!" Naruto shouted to no one in particular. He summoned four more clones and sat in the strange oil collecting in a pool at the edge of the mountain. "We can't very well stop now. This was the last thing Jiraiya-sensei told me to learn and I mean to learn it. Let's go, Toad Sage."

Chapter 21

"Neji Hyuuga has been locked in the Hyuuga compound for two days. We haven't seen him at all, Lady Hokage," a girl with two buns of brown hair on either side of her head explained. "We're worried that he needs a doctor but is too proud to go to one."

Tsunade nodded. Ever since Hinata and Hiashi came in, the Hyuuga's have been acting strangely. Neji was not the only Hyuuga to give sick notice. 'Maybe Kushina will have answers for me,' the Hokage thought to herself.

"Lord Hyuuga accompanied his daughter, Hinata, on a pilgrimage several days ago. The very next day, several members of the Hyuuga clan fell ill," Tsunade replied. "The hospital and private doctors have not reported being summoned to the Hyuuga clan compound, so I'm almost certain that something fishy is going on."

The teen wearing green spandex with an absurd bowl-cut interrupted. "Lady Hokage! Please allow me to investigate the strange sickness surrounding the Hyuuga clan! My youth will destroy any un-youthful plague that is attacking my comrades!"

"I appreciate your enthusiasm, Chunin Lee, but the matter is already being handled," Tsunade explained. "I dispatched a messenger and several medics to the Hyuuga compound this morning and expect them to return with a report soon. Rest assured that the situation is under control. You are dismissed."

—

"How DARE they question ME! I am the clan head! I will discipline any member of the clan as I see fit!" the temporary clan head raged. Neji was finally feeling better, but his balance was still shaky. Listening to the eleven-year-old girl rant about being in charge was making his head hurt. Not because she activated the seal again, but because her voice was whiney and squealed.

'I bet she could break glass if she shrieked loud enough…' he couldn't help thinking. "Lady Hyuuga," Neji attempted to interject.

"The sheer AUDACITY of those… those… those PEASANTS!" the girl with dark hair and pale eyes continued ranting.

The tantrum was taking place in an office with very little furniture styled in traditional Eastern motif. Neji sat respectfully on the floor, fully expecting the rant to continue if he didn't interrupt.

"Lady Hyuuga," Neji tried again, louder this time.

"Eh? What is it?" Hanabi impatiently looked at Neji, who was bowing.

"There are ANBU approaching the compound," Neji calmly explained. "One of them is Lady Fox."

"Just who is this Lady Fox that she's so important?" the soon-to-be teen demanded.

"Lady Fox is the head of ANBU, Lady Hyuuga," Neji informed. 'And you would do well to avoid her scrutiny, dumbass. But you'll find that out soon enough… Serves you right, too,' he thought.

"I am the clan head and I will NOT be interrupted. Make the old hag wait," Hanabi ordered as two female figures appeared in the dojo, wearing the signature black clothes, chest armor, and masks of ANBU.

The one with purple hair and a cat mask spoke first. "Lady Hyuuga, the Hokage requires your presence," she said, coldly.

"Tell the Hokage that I'll be with her shortly," Hanabi snapped.

The woman in the fox mask looked down at the clan head. "You have such pretty hair, Lady Hyuuga. Do you use any special products?"

'Damn… Lady Fox heard Lady Hyuuga,' Neji thought.

"I use only the finest hair-care products, as is befitting of a clan head, Fox," Hanabi responded, managing to look down her nose at the head of ANBU.

"I wonder why it's so dirty then," the redhead asked, tilting her head.

Hanabi spun to a mirror to verify that her hair was indeed covered in dirt. Neji's byakugan could see a clone tampering with the conditioner in Hanabi's bathroom, but he remained silent. He turned his eyes to meet Lady Fox's and winked at the woman.

"I will go to the Hokage as soon as I wash this filth from my hair," Hanabi responded, wondering how her hair was covered in dirt.

Once Hanabi left, Neji stumbled over to Fox and Cat. "Does the Hokage require my presence as well?" he asked as Cat steadied him.

Kushina thought for a moment, but quickly nodded. "Yes. You are a jonin-sensei and she needs to know what illness has kept you from your duties," she responded. "What illness could so egregiously affect your abilities?"

"I'm sure that some rest is all that I will need to recover," Neji responded. "Of course, if I wasn't weakened," Neji calmly explained, "I would know exactly what happened here. It's terrible that the acting clan head's bodyguard was unable to protect her from a prank."

—

The Hokage's office was mostly still. Tsunade clones were organizing the piles of paperwork into various categories, signing off on mission reports, and making mission assignments, while Tsunade and Kushina sat in chairs with a bottle of sake between them.

"Oh, Kushina… that's mean," Tsunade said through teary eyes. Her stomach still hurt from laughing so hard. "She's only twelve."

"She's eleven. And the little bitch needs to learn how to play with the Big Girls," Kushina said with a smile. "If she thinks she's special because she's acting clan head... Well, she isn't. And she needs to learn to respect other people."

"Still… Nair in her conditioner? With a genjutsu to make her believe that her hair was filthy?" Tsunade asked.

Kushina just smiled evilly. "It is a lesson that she won't soon forget. I could have just maimed her or killed her on the spot, you know."

"Stop acting crazy. You wouldn't hurt a child like that," Tsunade scolded.

Kushina's crazy-face faded to a light smile. "You're right, but don't tell her that. They'll be here shortly. I'll see you later, Lady Hokage," Kushina said, bowing and dispelling in a puff of smoke.

The knock at the door from Shizune alerted the Hokage to make a note of where each stack left off. Tsunade sighed, dispelling the clones. "Enter," she intoned.

Neji Hyuuga opened the door to the Hokage's office for a smaller Hyuuga wearing a bandana. "I wish to lodge a complaint against the ANBU known as Fox," the girl said as she entered.

"Oh?" Tsunade said, barely managing to contain a laughing fit. "What has the head of ANBU done?"

"She has assaulted my person," the indignant girl claimed.

"She assaulted you? Did anyone see this? Do you have any injuries?" Tsunade asked, feigning concern.

The girl stared at the Hokage and pulled off the bandana to reveal a completely bare skull. "She assaulted me and I wish to report her," Hanabi repeated.

"Lady Fox shaved your head?" Tsunade asked.

"She put Nair in my hair products!" Hanabi said with a huff. "I want her arrested and punished!"

"I'm sorry, but the village doesn't bend to your whim," Tsunade said in her Hokage voice. "If you wish to pursue this, then you should report the matter to ANBU or the Jonin Commander so that they can investigate. Otherwise, I have serious matters to discuss with you, Lady Hyuuga. I would like to know why most of your clan has been too ill to work."

Hanabi paled slightly. Neji stood quietly, like a good bodyguard, while his charge took the brunt of an angry Hokage yelling about manpower and fitness to lead. 'I miss Hinata and Lord Hyuuga,' he thought after only ten minutes.

—

The forest rocketed by the teenaged girl with short, dark hair, just long enough for a ponytail. The massive trees provided many launching points to keep the travel pace between a light jog and a ninja run. A man with similar features and longer hair labored to keep pace with the teen.

"How long has it been since you've been on a mission, Father?" Hinata asked as the pair travelled at a pace that would break a normal chunin.

Hiashi was huffing and puffing, but he refused to show any weakness. "A while," he responded tersely.

"Are you alright? It's almost dark and I'm going to have to take a bathroom break soon," Hinata asked, enjoying her father's anguish immensely. For years he had told her that she was weak, that she wasn't worthy of being the next clan head. She still loved her father, but after the years of being called weak, she couldn't help feeling a hint of joy as she outpaced him. The pair had been travelling for nearly eight hours without stopping.

Hiashi grunted, "Fine," before his breathing became heavy again.

'Her ANBU record was impressive,' the Hyuuga patriarch thought. 'Twenty-four assassinations, seven infiltrations, and even four seductions in just one year. My weak daughter; the disappointment; the failure in the Gentle Fist. Only a chunin they said. Neji is stronger they said. Even Hanabi is stronger they said. If only the elders knew… Maybe I should reinstate her as clan heir and retire.'

"How did you … so much stamina?" Hiashi huffed more than asked.

Hinata smiled kindly. "Kushina-sensei trains ANBU with great intensity. There are no exceptions."

"Are you … able to fight?" he asked, genuinely curious about his daughter's capabilities.

"I could, if necessary," she responded. "The minimum rank for joining ANBU is chunin, but most are about Jonin level by the time they finish the training program. Some opt to continue until they are S-ranked," she hinted.

Hiashi thought for a moment before responding. His aching lungs had nothing to do with it. Really. "How?" he finally asked.

"The same way that all training has been modified: judicious use of medical intervention," Hinata answered. "It's far easier to advance when no one worries about injuries. The program would not have worked even a few years ago, but Tsunade and Shizune have trained and implemented an unparalleled medical program. There are enough medics to heal the worst injuries and accelerate recovery times from training strain."

Hinata stopped and retrieved the map that the Hokage had given her. The Toads and the Slugs were on good terms and if the Slug Princess sent someone, then the Toads would at least be hospitable. Even at the inhuman pace Hinata was setting, it would still be almost two weeks before they would arrive at Mount Myoboku.

"I think I'll take that break now, Father. Feel free to rest and drink some water," Hinata said, looking at the nearby foliage.

—

Naruto sat in a pool of oil meditating. His eyes were shadowed with orange and oil fell on him without disturbing his apparent trance. The natural energy surrounding him was easy to feel after years of a similar meditation that Jiraiya had insisted he learn.

'Maybe this is why the old goat had me practice those stillness exercises,' he thought before the old toad with a goatee called out.

"Naruto! It's time to try without the training wheels. Get out of the oil pond," Fukasaku instructed.

Naruto stood, jumping to the edge of the pond. He felt stronger, somehow. Reinforced by the mixture of yin, yang, and natural energies he'd gathered within his body.

"You've done well, young Naruto. Now, you must learn to gather the sage chakra without the toad oil. And then I will teach you Toad Sage taijutsu," Fukasaku explained.

Naruto let the sage chakra dissipate before following the old toad through the strange forest to their next training spot. He knew that Jiraiya was a force to be reckoned with and that the sage arts were a major part in that. If he had any hope of defeating Akatsuki, he knew that what he learned with the Toads would be crucial.

—

Sasuke still had bandages around his head from his eye-replacement surgery. His bag was already packed and his mind was clear. He knew that his next mission might be his last with how ROOT had insisted he hurry.

"Sasuke, you are being unnecessarily cold to the howler-monkey," Itachi commented.

"You call her a howler-monkey, brother. Why do you care how I treat her?" Sasuke responded.

"Fine. You are being unnecessarily cold to Sakura," Itachi retorted. "What happened to make you treat her like that?"

Sasuke sat at the table, trying not to scratch his itching eyes, but lifting the bandage that covered his eyes. "She's like tsukuyomi," he simply said, staring directly into Itachi's eyes with his own sharingan spinning.

Itachi sighed, removing the glasses he now wore, and activated the prized genjutsu. The two were in a world that Itachi hadn't used to just talk since before he killed Shisui. "What was so important that we had to discuss it in the most powerful genjutsu I can use?"

Sasuke responded by opening his mouth and lifting his tongue to expose a seal similar to the one Itachi bore. "Oh," Itachi said, ending the genjutsu prematurely.

"Just because I think she's like a torture genjutsu, doesn't mean that she's a bad person," Itachi replied, covering for his brother. 'When I break this seal, I'm going to unmake Danzo,' he calmly thought.

"I have to go on a mission. Perhaps we could train later?" Sasuke said as he picked up his bag and went to the door.

"Of course," Itachi answered, adding, "Go easy on those eyes. The sharingan does not come naturally to them and I don't want them to fail you in the middle of a mission."

—

Shikamaru fidgeted under the glare of the Hokage and the head of ANBU.

"I'm not letting Naruto marry your girlfriend just so that she can stay here," Kushina said sternly. "So you'd better hope that the Sand elders bite off on this little exchange program you've cooked up."

Shikamaru nodded silently.

"Did Naruto tell you about the Akatsuki problem?" Tsunade asked, angry at having to deal with a potential international incident.

"I should have been told sooner," Shikamaru answered.

"You shouldn't have been told at all," Tsunade replied angrily.

Shikamaru looked at Kushina who stared at him with intensity that he'd only seen in Naruto's eyes. "It would have changed my answer to joining ANBU last year," Shikamaru retorted, slightly irritated.

"But you turned me down last year and now we need to train your body to the point where you can keep up without raising suspicion," Kushina said aloud, while secretly signing, 'I told you so,' to Tsunade.

"I can get you Sakura for four hours every night, but you can't tell her what any of this is about," the Hokage compromised. "She is not to know that you are training to fight S-ranked opponents. Is that clear?"

Shikamaru nodded. "I was talking to Uzumaki," Tsunade said as she continued staring at Kushina.

"Yes, Lady Hokage. Sakura is not to know about Akatsuki," Kushina replied, turning to Shikamaru. "I am preparing you for the jonin test, as far as anyone else is concerned. And you will get your father to teach you clan techniques. If he gives you any trouble, blackmail him. If you don't have anything, I've got a few things that could convince him, but Shikaku will probably figure out what we're up to."

Shikamaru sighed, muttering, "Troublesome."

"Don't worry about that," Tsunade interrupted. "I told Shikaku about Akatsuki when the mission to save Gaara failed."

Kushina smiled evilly at Shikamaru. "In that case, just tell him that I'm asking him to train you and that if I'm happy with how you progress, we're even for Minato's bachelor party," she said with crazy eyes. "Tell him that if I'm not happy, I'm telling your mother about it."

Shikamaru sighed again, muttering, "Really troublesome," before he turned and left the office. He was smart enough to know when he'd been dismissed without anyone actually saying the word.

—

Naruto stood in front of a table opposite the massive bars that locked the nine-tailed fox away. Two clawed fingers protruded from the cage holding what appeared to be a miniscule, wooden brick. The tower of wooden bricks began to wobble and then fell with a clatter.

"Ha! I win, Kurama!" Naruto exclaimed.

The nine-tailed fox roared, shaking the bars and rattling the table, including the collapsed pile of Jenga bricks. Red water bubbled through the bars, lifting Naruto up and knocking over the table and game.

"Oi! Stop that!" Naruto shouted. "Don't be a sore loser!"

The kyuubi roared again, but the red water receded. "That game isn't fair! You have tiny little hands and I have giant claws!" the great beast raged.

"You said you wanted to play something new and this is the only game I could think of," Naruto said as the last of the red water receded back behind the bars.

The massive fox growled. "Whatever. That game is stupid," Kurama muttered before curling up. "You're not even here to see me, so just do it already."

Naruto sighed. 'I've been putting this off for far too long,' he thought. 'And now that I'm practiced at changing chakra modulation, I really have no excuse.'

He floated up to the center of the cage, where a paper with the word "seal" was stuck over what must have been a lock. He lifted his hand to the edge of the paper before yelling, "I know you're in here, Fourth Hokage! I know you set this failsafe, Minato Namikaze! If I have to break the seal to get you to show yourself, I will! Now… SHOW YOURSELF!"

A blonde man in his twenties appeared next to Naruto next to the seal with a stern yet confused look on his face, quickly grabbing the teen's hand and moving it away from the seal. "I thought you'd grown out of temper-tantrums," the man said kindly.

"I needed to get you out of the seal in order to talk and I had no intention of waiting until a problem with the seal came up," Naruto replied with a smile. "Besides," Naruto said as a tendril of energy leapt from Naruto to the older man, changing from blue to blue-green as it travelled from Naruto to Minato, "you won't run out of chakra, so we can have a long conversation and you can teach me everything you know."

And that is it! The author didn't finish the story after that.

[xiaosmoon]

what tattoos they would have.

feat. childe, diluc, & kaeya.

warnings: none.

childe.

- i imagine him to be the type with a bunch of tattoos littered all over him in a modern au. but realistically? i could see him having a tattoo on his lower left side abdomen. it would be blank inked of his harbinger mask.

- he wouldn't ever show off his tattoo to you intentionally; mostly because he forgets it's even there. it's on the opposite side of his lil peep hole so you would probably never see it unless he's walking around shirtless.

- childe probably doesn't even remember why he got it in the first place. it's not like he's proud of being a harbinger, even though he uses his title to his advantage all the time. ("i am the 11th of the fatui harbingers. that's why. now go, fetch me something to eat.") more so a symbol of who he is. and that he shouldn't forget what he's done to get that position.

- the first time you see the tattoo you're a bit taken back and confused. why get a tattoo of his mask?

the both of you rarely get time to yourselves. with childe always on fatui business and you caught up in your own work, lounging around the house and doing absolutely nothing was a luxury. you were in the kitchen cooking up a lovely meal for childe and yourself. too focusing on deciding which seasoning you should use, the arms that were slowing making their way around your body surprised you. "hello." you smiled, adding paprika to your pot. childe had just gotten out of the shower and his head was resting on your shoulder, wet hair brushing against the crook of your neck. "ugh childe, you're wet." you wiggle out of his embrace and turn around to meet his figure.

"what are you cooking? smells delicious." childe peers into the pot behind you.

your cheeks heated up at the sight of him. shirtless. you were new to this relationship and this was your first ever time seeing him shirtless. you were quite afraid to speak, scared that your words would come out as a jumbled mess.

he looked beautiful like this. wet hair, bright blue eyes, built arms, and- wait. is that a tattoo? making it obvious that you were staring, childe flicked ur head playfully. "like what you see?" you roll your eyes at the cliche saying and turn back to your cooking.

"i like your tattoo." childe smiles at your comment and hops up on the counter next to you. "i got it a few months ago. i honestly forget it's still there sometimes."

"maybe i should get one and we can match!"

"absolutely not."

diluc.

- this man would absolutely have a tattoo of a bird and no one can tell me otherwise. i can see him going for more of a minimal look and would have one on his upper back. it would be a small bird, nothing too noticeable.

- like childe, diluc wouldn't show off his tattoo but for different reasons. partially because he regrets getting it.

- he also tends to forget about it because he can't see it.

- the first time you see his tattoo would be when you both hit the beach.

it was a very hot summer day, so what a better to do than spend it at the beach with your boyfriend? convincing diluc to come with you was no easy task. this man can physically not vacation. even to mention a vacation would send him into panic. "a vacation? now? but there's so much to do; i couldn't possibly pack up and leave. who's going to manage the orders coming in next week? and what about-"

yeah you get the idea.

but when eventually you were able to convince him, diluc was all in. and at the beach there was no way he would wear his daily attire. a heavy coat and covered head to toe? absolutely not. he was laying down next to you in nothing but a pair of swim shorts and you couldn't deny you enjoyed the view. it was rare for you to see diluc without heavy clothing and you definitely wouldn't mind seeing him like this more.

"diluc, do you want me to put sunscreen on you? i'm scared you're going to fry." you ask in a teasing manner. diluc smiles up at you sits up more. "it's alright dear i can do it myself. thank you for reminding me, i'm afraid i really would fry." with his pale ass i wouldn't let him go an hour without reapplying.

rubbing sunscreen all over himself, diluc meets a issue; not being able to get his back. "dear, would you mind?" his sheepish smile tells you what he needs. you motion him to turn his back to you and that's when you see it, his beautiful bird tattoo. you squirt some sunscreen into your hand and immediately start at the tattooed area. "i didnt know you had a tattoo." "hm? oh, i forgot about that thing."

you smile and continue rubbing until you're done. "it's pretty." diluc blushes a little at the comment. "thank you. now turn around, let me get your back."

kaeya.

- this man. this lovely man. if anyone would have a tattoo it would be him. and he wouldn't just have one, no, he would have two. one on the inner upper side of his left forearm, your birthday in roman numerals. the second one right on his boob (couldn't decide which one) of a pavo ocellus constellation and it would be very beautiful.

- i don't know why he got the pavo ocellus one, but he got the one of your birthday cause he loves you and says it's the "best day in the world." he would totally surprise you with it.

- i feel like kaeya is the type to have a meaningful tattoos and would also flaunt them.

- he'll be at the tavern taking to his drinking buddies and just bring up his tattoos. "hey did i ever tell you i got y/n's birthday tattooed on my arm? yeah! look!"

it was the day after your birthday and you were exhausted. amber threw a huge surprise party for you at angel's share and you were dancing and drinking all night, leaving you burnt out the next day.

jean allowed you the day off so you spent it at home, relaxing and writing thank you cards to everyone who brought you gifts. kaeya's gift to you was the prettiest of them all. a beautiful necklace with your favorite flower on it, made of pure diamonds. you weren't one for expensive jewelry but the one who gifted it to you made it worth it.

kaeya came home that evening with the dorkiest smile on his face. his usual sly and flirty demeanor was not present. "y/n, guess whattttt" he dragged out his words plopping next to you on the couch. you were a bit worried, you've never seen kaeya have the expression of a happy child who looks like they just bought all of the candy in the candy shop. "what is it?" you raise a brow at him. he throws out his arm in front of you quickly, making you flinch a bit. it takes a moment for you to see what he was showing you but oh my, what a beautiful tattoo.

it was your birthday. you look back up at him and smile. "that's very cute of you kae. looks like i'll just have to get your birthday on me too!"

his flirty dark smile makes its appearance again. "can i choose where?"

"no."

[nashibirne]

DESPERADO - 3

Helen and August are back. Sorry it took me a while to write the next chapter but our holidays got in the way of writing. Anyway, here it is and it's getting a little steamy. I somehow struggled with writing the smut this time, it was somewhat hard to find the right balance in their dynamics but I think it turned out fine in the end. I hope you like it, too. As you know, writers live off validation, so comments, reblogs and likes are very much appreciated 💜

Pairing: Augut Walker x OFC (Helen Nichols)

Summary: August has survived the fight with Ethan Hunt and the fall from the cliff. A few lucky coincidences saved his life and he ends up with a woman that saves him and gives him shelter in her little hermit hut. He is at a turning point in his life. What is he going to do?

Word count: ~ 3.1 k

Warnings: Description of injuries, smut, NSFW, 18+, unprotected sex, oral sex (f and m receiving), vaginal sex

NO BETA! English is not my mother tongue, so expect bad grammar, wrong spelling, chaotic punctuation and clumsy language. All mistakes are mine…

Credits: I don’t own August Walker and anything related to MI:Fallout. Pics for the moodboard from pinterest, face claim Helen: Rooney Mara

You can find parts 1 and 2 and my other fics on my masterlist.

Taglist (please let me know if you want to be added or removed)

@lunedelorient @inlovewithhisblueeyes @willkatfanfromasia @hell1129-blog @mis-lil-red @agniavateira @kebabgirl67 @omgkatinka @legendarywizarddetective @summersong69 @taebfada @xxxkatxo @artandotherdelights @notabronte @littlefreya @luclittlepond @eldarwen333 @meowpurrbooks @marantha @liliumdream @enchantedbytomandhenry @greensleeves888 @witcherfan @margauxmargaux07 @radaofrivia @m07belzen @a-little-counter-esperanto @starstruckkittyangel @mary-ann84 @sillyrabbit81 @emelinelovesjc

Let's go...

***************

Desperado

Oh, you ain't gettin' no younger

Your pain and your hunger

They're drivin' you home

Freedom, oh freedom

Well that's just some people talkin'

Your prison is walkin' through this world all alone

From Desperado by The Eagles, Lyrics: Don Henley, Glenn Frey

"She's dead. She died in an accident. She was gone. I stayed."

No matter how hard August tried to find out more about Allison, there was no way to make Helen tell him anything else but these simple basics. She'd worked hard on building a protective wall around that part of her heart and her mind, she had closed off the grief and the feeling of guilt and she wasn't willing to hand over the key to her memories to a random stranger who was lying about his identity.

Besides August's futile attempts to pry into Helen's past the next two weeks were quite harmonious. While Helen had decided to ignore the fact that Austin Peters was a fake persona to avoid any kinds of complications, August had decided to accept the inevitable and to be a nice houseguest and he grudgingly let Helen take care of him. They soon got used to the fact that her help made them share pretty intimate moments and August had a hard time granting her access to his personal space, letting her literally touch him everywhere when she had to treat his wounds or help him get dressed and undressed, but he also watched her blush and shy away from him with fiendish joy.

It made him feel better about his face that his body obviously still had a significant effect on Helen and he couldn't deny that seeing her running around in her underwear or imagining her standing in the shower naked had a certain effect on him too. And it wasn't only physical, he really started to like her. She was smart and tough but also witty and cheeky sometimes, and it was hard for him to admit to himself that he enjoyed her company. Stockholm syndrome for sure, he tried to tell himself but in the back of his mind he knew the truth.

He had no idea that Helen felt the same and that her aloof manner was mostly facade. Behind the mask of indifference she was growing warm feelings for him. Warm, foolish, irrational feelings for a man she actually knew nothing about and who was involved in an FBI investigation. She blamed her hunger for interpersonal interactions and warmth that resulted from her self-chosen isolation for these surfacing emotions and did her best to ignore them.

What was really bothering Helen most after only a few days was the sleeping situation. Despite the fact that the there-is-only-one-bed-trope was everything from hot to romantic in theory it was only leading to back pain in reality. August kept on offering to sleep on the couch but she wouldn't let him. He needed a comfortable place to sleep and her sofa was hardly big enough for her. A tall man like him wouldn't be able to get a wink of sleep on it. So after 14 nights she decided to do something about it. She had made a call in the morning, August had heard her muffled voice from the kitchen when he was in the bathroom, and now a car was driving up to the hut. He started to panic.

"Who's that?"

He looked at Helen and she gave him a shrug.

"A friend. He's bringing me a folding bed, called him this morning. I'm not going to survive another night on the couch."

A car door was slammed shut with a thud and foot steps were coming closer to the front door.

"He can't come in, Helen", August whispered, giving her a pleading glance. She raised an eyebrow.

"Why's that?"

"He mustn't see me. Please."

Helen eyed him up and down and when it knocked August held his breath, his heart racing. She turned to the door without another word and August grabbed a large knife from the knife block before hiding in the corner of the room that wasn't visible from the entrance. Helen flinched when she realized that he'd armed himself but after taking a deep breath she opened the door with a nonchalant smile.

"Naseer. Hi. That was quick."

"Hi Helen. Yeah, it sounded urgent on the phone and you can't sleep in a broken bed so I thought I better bring you the folding bed as soon as possible."

August tried to imagine the man who belonged to the pleasant, warm voice. His English was very good but he clearly wasn't a native speaker. Someone from the village he guessed. From the village he would have erased without batting an eyelid just two weeks ago. His stomach twisted at the thought and it filled him with anger that he seemed to evolve something like a conscience lately.

"That's really kind of you."

He could hear the smile in Helen's voice.

"Let me help you unload it."

"No, I'll go and get it. Just tell me where to put it."

"Just put it here on the porch. I'll take care of it later."

Naseer gave Helen a funny look and she knew he was thinking she was acting strange but she could hardly let him walk inside the hut where August was awaiting him with a knife. She watched her only friend walk to his truck, grabbing the bed from the loading space and carrying it to the house.

"It's no problem to carry it inside", he said when he was standing in front of Helen again. "I could also fix your bed. I built it, it shouldn't be hard to replace a broken part."

He built it? The guy built Helen's bed? August started to wonder what kind of friend he was and why the question bothered him so much.

"No! No, that won't be necessary, Naseer."

Christ, woman, don't talk so fast. Her nervousness was showing in her voice and August was worried he might really have to use that fucking knife.

"Really, it's fine...I'm quite busy right now. In the middle of a creative phase...you know...kissed by the muse."

Good girl, back on track. August's heart rate went back to normal.

"You're working on your book again? That's great, Hel."

Hel? He rolled his eyes, annoyed and impatient.

"Yeah, it really is. My agent is pretty relieved too, my writer's block made him quite nervous. But I'm working almost non-stop on it...so yeah."

She shrugged with a sheepish grin, feeling terrible for lying to him.

"Is that why you needed all those supplies? Because you don't want to leave for grocery shopping in the next few weeks? Your truck was loaded when we met the other day."

"Exactly."

"I see...well…"

"Yeah…"

"I better get going then. Let you work in peace…"

"Thanks for stopping by, Naseer."

"Anytime. You know you can always call me when something's wrong or when you need help, right?"

"Of course." Her laugh sounded fake and nervous and for a moment she thought Naseer was going to ask her what was going on but he only gave her a worried look before he left. Helen let out a long sigh of relief, turned around and closed the door behind her.

"He's gone. You can put that away." She pointed at the knife August clung to, her eyes shooting daggers at him.

"What?" He looked at her angrily, putting the knife back in the knife block. "I just wanted to be prepared."

Helen let out a snort. "For what? Naseer attacking an injured stranger?"

"I don't know him."

"But I do. He's a friend and you made me act rude without a reason."

"A friend, huh? Hel?" August said in a mocking tone wiggling his eyebrows. He tried to be cheeky and make her laugh to ease the tension but he knew it was a stupid move as soon as the words left his mouth.

"Yes. A friend. Austin."

She was still being deadly serious and stressed his false name pointedly crossing her arms in front of her chest. August didn't know what to say or do to keep the situation from escalating so he just shrugged.

"Fine."

"Fine? That's all you have to say? For fucks sake...tell me why you didn't want Naseer to see you. Explain to me why you armed yourself with a knife, hiding in a dark corner of my house. My fucking house, goddamn…in which you found shelter..." She was furious now and he made a step towards her, his hands raised up in surrender. "Okay, listen, Helen."

"I'm all ears."

"As I said, it was just taking precautions. I'm a mistrustful person, made some bad experiences in the past and got hurt too often."

"Bullshit." She shook her head. "Don't try to tug at my heartstrings. Just tell me the truth."

August took a deep breath, he was getting frustrated and annoyed by her insistence.

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just can't, okay? Let's just leave it at that or…"

“Or what? Are you going to kill me?”

Her voice was full of sarcasm but her eyes showed him that a part of her was scared of him, wondering what he was capable of. The logical answer to her question would have been yes. His answer should have been yes, but when he said no, when he denied it, August meant it. He wasn't going to kill her nor would he ever hurt her.

“No, but I still can’t tell you.”

She could tell by the expression on his face that he was torn. He wanted to open up to her, but he felt like he couldn't.

“Just give me something. A little part of the truth to help me understand who you are, where you’re coming from and what you`re up to."

“That’s not so easy, Helen. You might not like what you’re going to hear.”

He gave her a shrug and something that was supposed to be a smile.

“I don’t care. August.”

He blinked repeatedly. “Sorry?”

“Yes...August.” She rolled her eyes. “I know that you've been lying to me from day one."

He got up and started to pace the hut, still hobbling a little, though his ankle was much better. He wasn’t really worried just debating with himself. After a while he stopped by the window, staring outside. “You're right. My name is August. August Walker.”

"Thanks, but I already know that much", Helen snapped.

"How did you find out about my name?" He asked as calmly as his fluttering nerves allowed it, turning around to look her in the eyes.

"Why did you lie to me?" Helen threw him a challenging look.

"How much do you know?" August was not willing to leave his questions unanswered.

"Why. Did. You. Lie. To. Me?" Helen shouted at him.

"It's none of your fucking business", he yelled back.

Helen laughed out loud.

"It's none of my business? Are you kidding me? I saved you. I let you stay in my house, sleep in my bed, I treat your wounds, I take care of you, give you shelter, I've helped you in every possible way, no matter how many of my personal boundaries have been transgressed and now you're seriously telling me that it's none of my business that you've lied to me all this fucking time?"

"I've never asked for your help."

His voice was calm, his facial expression blank and stern but his eyes were blazing with emotion. His stare was so intense it made Helen shiver.

"You ungrateful ass", she whispered, stunned by his audacity. "You took all I had to give without saying thank you only once. And now you're…"

He was right in front of her with two big strides, his lips crashing on hers with unexpected passion. Helen was too surprised to think about her reaction. She instinctively kissed him back, granting him access, letting him deepen the kiss, allowing his hands to explore her body. 60 seconds later she was in control of herself again. She pushed him away, staring at him dumbfounded.

"Shit. What are you doing?"

"Expressing my gratitude."

He gave her an outrageously sexy smirk and it took Helen just a split second to grab him by his shirt and pull him close again to kiss him feverishly. She wanted him. She wanted him badly. She wanted him now.

August pressed her against the wall with his huge body, caressing her tits through her clothes while kissing her neck. She moaned and started to tug at his shirt. He took it off in a hurry and Helen got rid of her top and bra. When they kissed again she let her hands run over his chest gently, making sure not to hurt him. She pulled away and looked at him, at his scarred face that was still so handsome now that the wounds were healing and the swelling had gone down around his eye. August averted his eyes, burying his head in the crook of her neck again, withdrawing from her gaze.

"Turn around", he mumbled, taking her by her waist.

She did what he asked her to do but when she heard him fumble with his belt and the sound of his pants hitting the floor behind her back, when his hands tried to pull down her sweatpants impatiently, she turned around again. She reached up and cupped his face with her tiny hands, running her thumb tenderly over his burnt skin.

"Listen, August. This is not going to be a quickie, okay? You want to express your gratitude? Great. I like this. But do it properly. Fuck me rough, if you want to, fuck me hard, but don't you dare to hide from me. Look at me. Kiss me. Give me the feeling of being wanted. Pretend it's more than just some kind of job."

He looked at her with an unreadable expression, hesitating for a moment. He opened his mouth but instead of saying something he pressed his lips together with a nod. Helen smiled at him before stripping naked slowly.

When he kissed her again he took his time, enjoying the sensation of holding her naked body close to his now. She was surprised by his tenderness, by his gentle touch and the delicate kisses he covered her body with and blown away by the passion that soon erupted from deep within him. It was just a small step from long, slow kisses to making out like two hungry predators.

He lifted her up easily and carried her to her bed where he laid her down on her back carefully. He climbed between her legs and looked at her.

"Ready to get fucked like never before?"

She smirked. "Big words. I hope you're not all mouth."

"You don't like my mouth?" He started to kiss her belly, licking her skin, leaving a wet trace that led down south where his tongue met her soft pubic hair.

"I love your mouth."

Helen moaned when he kissed her pussy and parted her folds with his tongue.

"Yeah? You like my tongue too?"

He started to tongue fuck her and she grabbed his head, pressing his face closer to her sex.

"Shut up and eat me out."

She threw her head back when sucked on her clit.

"Oh fuck…" She moved her hips slowly to the rhythm of his actions, rolling them with intense motions, burying her fingers in his thick, curly hair. "Just like this...yes."

Her moans got louder and louder and his dick was so hard it hurt, leaking precum. He knew she was about to come but she stopped him before she climaxed.

"Lay down", she ordered and so they switched positions. August had always been a dominant lover but being bossed around by her was a great turn on. He loved how determined she was, it was incredibly sexy how she was chasing her high, not even trying to hide that she wanted to fulfil her own needs most of all. She was starved, desperately in need of this, of him. In this moment she needed him, she wanted him, she allowed him to give her what she was craving.

Helen was kneeling between his legs now, grabbing his dick. "I love your cock too." She grinned at him before she started to suck him off with a devotion that was new to him.

She turned him into a whimpering, panting mess soon, her lips and her tongue working their magic on his dick, and just like her, he grabbed her head to have some kind of control over her actions. He made her take him deeper and she took him deeper.

"Good girl. Taking me so well."

His voice was raspy and she locked eyes with him, her gaze telling him that she liked to be praised. August groaned when she slowly pulled back, licking his length one last time.

"Fuck, Helen...I need to feel you."

"I'll make you feel me."

Saliva was dripping from her swollen lips and he almost got off just by the sight of it. His saviour, his saint had turned into a shameless whore and he was willing to worship and adore her for being his dirty, little slut.

"Yes, you will."

He grabbed her by her waist and pulled her onto his cock. She sighed with pleasure when he entered her tight cunt, stretching her wet pussy and as soon as she got used to his size she started to ride him, rolling her hips slowly in a rhythm that was giving them both the greatest pleasure. August stroked her tits, caressed and kneaded them and she supported her body with her hands on his chest. She picked up speed and when August pinched her nipple she came with a hoarse shriek, her whole body trembling with ecstasy and lust.

Helen bent down to kiss him and he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly while thrusting his hips. He fucked her without restraint now, his thrusts hard, fast and deep. He railed her mercilessly until his intense orgasm swept him away. He let out a long, satisfied moan and loosened his grip on her body.

He kissed her again but she seemed to be in a rush suddenly and rolled off him and went to the bathroom. August was kind of surprised and sobered to a certain degree when he heard that she was taking a shower. She either couldn't stand after-sex-cuddles in general or she really thought that he had just done her a favor to thank her for her hospitality.

He wondered how many times he would have to fuck her till she was willing to fall asleep in his arms afterwards.

*****

[missymurphy1985]

The Return

It's been 2 years since you were last in Dublin. 2 years since you up and left without warning, saying goodbye to your life there and restarting somewhere completely new. Sometimes, you have to go backwards in order to move forwards.

Requested by @noctvrnalmoth I hope you like it!

*Featuring Jim from the Delinquent Season*

Stepping off the train into the platform, you sighed. It all looked the same, and yet so different. Pulling the buggy open, you gently strapped your sleeping son in and made your way to the taxi rank, your suitcase trailing behind you. A kind lady helped you with your bags and waited with you for an available taxi.

"You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders there, are you okay?" She sat next to you on the bench as your son murmured adorably in his sleep. "Sorry, I don't mean to pry..."

"No don't be sorry.. just been a long time since I came back here is all. Few loose ends to tie up." You glanced at your son's sleepy features as his eyes started to open. Beautiful, ocean blue eyes alongside his dark hair, growing more every day... The memories of that night flooding back before you took a large gulp of water from the bottle in your bag, forcing them back down. You'd done so well... 2 years and you'd built a new life in London. New friends, amazing new job allowing you to put that degree in marketing to good use - you were finally making a complete fresh start. But the secrets you had buried deep inside kept coming to the surface the more your son grew. He deserved to know his roots, who his father was, you knew that, but you couldn't do it.

Choking a tear back, you thanked the kind lady for helping you as a taxi pulled up and she helped you to get in.

Pulling up outside your cousin Natalie's townhouse in the city centre, she was waiting for you at the gate to help with Jackson and your bags. Grinning from ear to ear she pulled you in for a huge hug once you'd got inside and settled on her couch as Jackson sat in this new lady's lap tugging at her earrings.

"I can't believe I'm only just meeting him y/n.. he's the image of you!!" She kissed his cheek, bringing him up to look at him properly for the first time not over Skype.

"I never see it, I just see.... I just see him I guess..." You mind wandered to the man you actually saw, but you didn't let it slip.

"Those EYES!!! So blue and vibrant, just beautiful!" Natalie was swooning now, she'd never seen eyes that blue on a baby. Your eyes were brown, so he clearly inherited them from his father, although you had never revealed his identity - just a drunken one night stand and he wasn't involved. You weren't lying, technically...

After catching up properly, Natalie told you she'd planned a few people coming over to welcome you back that evening - nothing major, just a few friends from years ago that were keen to see you after so long away.

"Oh.. yes, that would be nice... Um, who's coming?"

"Well I think David and Amanda, possibly Caroline.. I think Liam is asking Jim too but I'm not sure if he's up for it - he's been through a tough time lately.." you caught a gasp in your throat at the sound of his name. Last you heard, through Natalie, he and Danielle were going through a rough patch. Cheating accusations on both sides, they'd agreed to a trial separation. "Apparently she isn't as broken hearted as once thought - already shacked up with someone new, fancy house on the coast, new Jag on the driveway, she's doing quite well for herself!" Your chin began to wobble, not unnoticed by Natalie, who placed Jackson in his bouncer on the floor and moved to place a hand on your shoulder.

"I'm fine Nat, honestly I'm good. It was a long time ago, things have changed. I'm not that silly little girl with a crush anymore..." Natalie looked into your eyes. Nothing ever got past her.

"Y/n.. when I said I'd never seen eyes that blue, I meant on a baby. Only one person I know has eyes like that, and I think you know too. Tell me the truth, please?" You were frozen, until tears escaped and you couldn't stop them. Jackson looked to see his mum crying and began crying too. Scooping him up, you held him close.

"It happened once... Just once Nat... And he doesn't know and he doesn't need to know, let's just leave it there, yeah?"

"What?? This is Jim's son? I was almost kidding y/n... How could you keep this from him for 2 years??" She was stood up now in complete shock. Jim wasn't just her friend, he was her husband's brother - this made things even more intense. The atmosphere could be cut with a knife.

"Please Nat... This wasn't easy okay? I was 21, I slept with a married man, and I got pregnant... Then mum died.. I had to go back to London to sort out the funeral and the will... I didn't want to be seen as the homewrecker that got herself knocked up..."

"And what about Jackson? Doesn't he deserve to know his father?"

"Of course... And he would.. when I was ready Nat. And I'm not ready..."

"Not ready for what?" Liam, Natalie's husband was stood in the doorway, as you heard the front door close. Now standing next to him was the man you were desperately trying to avoid... Jim stood behind him, eyes wide at the sight of you with a baby in your arms.

"Baby, we need to go pick up that delivery from the post office, remember the one we missed last week?" Natalie pulled a confused Liam out of the room, leaving his brother and you alone.

"Y/n... Hey.. um.. how are you?" You tried to smile in response but your heart was pounding in your chest, you could barely breathe.

"I.. yeah.. um, yeah I'm okay.." you glanced down at his hand.. the wedding ring was gone. "I'm sorry to hear about you and Olivia..."

"Probably for the best eh... We weren't exactly getting along, just stayed together for the kids I think. They're older now though, they're fine. Y/n.. where did you go? Why did you go?"

"My mum was ill... She'd had a stroke and they couldn't save her, I had to go... I just stayed.. and things happened.."

"You had a baby..." He looked at the little boy in your arms, feeling extremely nervous now. "He must be just over a year old, right?" You nodded.

"13 months.."

"And we... We had sex y/n.. the day before you left..." His own breath was faltering now as the dates in his mind started to catch up. Again, you nodded, tears rolling down your cheeks. The realisation of what was happening dawned on Jim. He started to back away, before shaking his head and storming out of the house, the door slamming behind him making you and your son jump.

Your sobs came out in full force now, Liam and Natalie coming back into the room. Liam took Jackson into the kitchen to find him something to eat as Natalie held you.

"It's okay y/n... Give him time yeah? Poor guys just had the shock of his life, he'll come round." Your heart was sinking.. you hadn't meant for any of this to happen, but here it was. The memory of that afternoon had never left you, you hadn't even been able to move on - your son, for starters, looked just like him, how could you find love with anyone with the constant reminder of the man you'd never have around you 24/7.

Flashback

"I'm so sorry Jim, I didn't know who else to call..." You climbed into his car, cheeks burning as he picked you up from outside the pharmacy. You'd been walking along the road when a pothole in the pavement took you by surprise and you'd tripped, your ankle turning funny - the pain was horrific, but no one seemed to be answering your phone calls when you rang around for someone to come pick you up. Reluctantly, you'd dialled Jim's number, your cousin's brother in law. He'd given you his number the previous week, after offering to help you move into your new apartment later that month.

"No problem, I was just dropping the kids at school so I was only round the corner." He helped you into the car and drove you back to his house. "I figured your place is in boxes, no chance of a first aid kit either, I'm guessing?"

"No," You laughed. "Thank you so much.." you grimaced as you turned your foot round, trying to ease the pain.

"Definitely not broken, just need to rest it. I'll put the kettle on." Jim led you into the kitchen and sat you down at the kitchen table, and grabbed an ice pack from the fridge. Lifting your leg onto the chair opposite, he placed the ice pack onto your ankle. "Feeling okay?" He asked, flicking the kettle on and preparing two mugs of coffee.

"Much better.. thank you." Definitely better.. the physical contact from him was driving you insane, you had to swallow the blushes in your cheeks, praying he hadn't noticed.

"I've only got instant coffee... Hope that's okay - Danielle won't let me buy a coffee machine." He rolled his eyes. His wife was one of the tightest women he'd ever met.

"It's fine, thank you.. and I honestly can't thank you enough for coming to get me.. I can't believe how clumsy I am!"

"Hey those pavements are a nightmare - I'm surprised no one's broken a leg yet! Don't you be moving now, I'll take you back home once that swelling has gone down."

"How did you know how to fix it all?"

"I have a son, y/n, who at one stage a few years ago thought he was an actual superhero and would fling himself off anything to check if he could fly.. you learn the difference between a broken ankle and a twisted one pretty quick!" He laughed, remembering the time his son climbed the tallest tree in the park, giving him a heart attack before throwing himself from the top - luckily Jim caught him before he hit the floor.

"I think it's better now, Jim, I can try and walk." You said, after chatting for a while in the large kitchen.

"Let me help you.." he held your hands and guided you upright, your chests now pressed together as you placed your foot gingerly on the floor, testing it's strength. Stumbling slightly, Jim caught you, your bodies now even closer together. You could feel his heart racing, could he feel yours? His hands wrapping around yours, holding you up, an arm snaking round your waist. You looked up and found him looking right back at you, your face inches from his. Before you had time to think, you kissed him, before quickly pulling back.

"Shit I'm sorry... Oh god.. no... I'm sorry..." He took your hand in his and pulled you back to him, pressing his lips back to yours. This time you didn't pull back, your mouth opening allowing his tongue to dance against yours. Lifting you up, he sat you on top of the counter, his hands roaming your body hungrily.

"I can't... I shouldn't..." He murmured against your neck, the vibrations driving you wild with need. "You're so fucking beautiful y/n..." He ground your hips against yours, you could feel his erection through his jeans as you reached down to cup it through them, kneading it slightly. He growled, pulling your hand up to his chest, his heart hammering underneath his shirt. "You feel that? Feel how fast that's going?" Silently you took his hand and placed against your chest.

"Feel mine...." You pushed his hand down lower.. over your breast... Down your stomach and under the waistband of your skirt. His fingers found your folds, and he gasped your name. "I'm wet... I'm so fucking wet..." Lifting your skirt up, he pulled your underwear down. You relieved him of his jeans and they fell to the floor, revealing no underwear, just his huge, hard cock already leaking.

"I see you are too..." You ran a finger along the slit, taking some of the precum and lifting it to your mouth. "You taste good..."

"You want this...?" He asked, lining himself up against you. You nodded, and he pushed in easily, you gasped his name and threw your head back as he filled you completely. Pulling on your hips, he rocked you against him as he moved his own hips back and forth, fucking you against the countertop. You legs wrapped round his waist as his thrusts came harder, deeper, faster.

"Fuck... Right there... Jim... Oh god...." He bit down on your exposed neck, hands pushing against your still covered breasts, he moaned.

"Feels so good y/n... You feel so good... That's it baby, I need to feel you... Cum for me..." You leaned back, and eyes locked with his you drew a hand down to circle your clit as he moved inside you.

"Gonna make myself cum on you... Gonna cum hard for you... Faster Jim..." He pounded into you now, your moans echoing through the kitchen as you came over him, his release following seconds later. Both of you leaned your heads together as your worlds came back into focus.

Present Day

"Hey."

"Hey.." you'd agreed to meet Jim for a coffee a few days later. He'd called you the evening before, slightly tipsy which made you chuckle. Liam and Natalie were watching Jackson while the two of you caught up.

"How's the hangover?" You smiled, he grimaced.

"Well I've definitely felt fresher.. it was a bit of a shock y/n..."

"Listen.. for what it's worth.. I'm sorry. I didn't know I was pregnant until I was nearly 20weeks. With the stress of losing mum and the funeral, I hadn't had a period for a while but I thought it was just the stress.. then my friend convinced me to take a test and the doctors confirming it.. it was too late to do anything about it.. then I heard you and Danielle were trying for another baby and I just couldn't do it Jim.. I couldn't destroy your life like that.." your hands were shaking. He leaned over and took your hands in his.

"I understand y/n.. I do. I spent most of this week thinking about it. I don't blame you for what you did.. but I do wish you'd told me."

"I'd done enough damage Jim, sleeping with a married man? On his kitchen counter where he makes his kids breakfast? Where his wife makes her coffee in the morning? I couldn't face you.. I couldn't face what I'd done.."

"You know where my wife was, that morning?" He leaned back, smiling a little. "At her office, bent over the desk while her boss fucked her from behind. She called my number by accident while it happened. I didn't answer, obviously, I was busy.. but my voicemail picked up the whole thing. I'd had my suspicions for a long time, but that confirmed it. We were never trying for another baby - that's just what she told people to distract them from the fact we were clearly falling apart at the seams. Couldn't exactly be mad at her after what I'd done with you though."

"Did you tell her?"

"Yes, but she didn't know it was you. Then you up and left.. I thought there was no need to tell her who it was. I guess now we kinda have to, right?"

"Jim, I don't expect anything from you, okay? I have an inheritance from my mum, I'm fine for money, there's no need to be involved if it'll cause you problems.."

"No. You've kept him from me for nearly 2 years y/n, don't do this again, please? I'm not asking you to move in, I'm not asking for a relationship, I just want to get to know our boy.. that's all.. please?" You saw it in his eyes. It was there, for all to see. Was it love?

"I'll call Nat.. ask her to bring him over, maybe we could go for a walk?" Jim smiled, nodding. You made the call, and an hour later you were walking to the local park, Jim pushing the stroller. He took Jackson out of the buggy and placed him inside a baby swing, pushing him gently while pulling silly faces making him giggle. Your heart swelled watching them.

"He's incredible.. those eyes.."

"Your eyes, Jim." He looked up at you and smiled listening to his son's giggle, before he started becoming grouchy again.

"He's teething... Come on little man, let's get you back shall we?" Jim lifted him from the swing and placed his little finger in Jackson's mouth. He responded by sucking his gums along it, finding relief. You smiled, watching Him soothe your son's whimpers of pain as his teeth came through.

Making your way inside Natalie's house, you were surprised to find it empty. A note on the kitchen counter read that they'd gone out for the afternoon, they wouldn't be home until the evening. You warmed a bottle of milk for Jackson as Jim gave him some Calpol. Taking the bottle from you, he fed his son, as you watched, heart pounding as you watched the man you were still in love with take such good care of your baby. Within 15 minutes, Jackson was fed and had been rocked to sleep in his father's arms, you took him and placed him upstairs in his cot to nap. You knew he'd be out for at least an hour after all that fresh air. Walking back into the lounge, you found Jim sat on the sofa waiting for you.

"Come here, y/n..." You sat next to him as he turned to face you, hand gently caressing your cheek. "What are we going to do now?"

"I'm heading back to London tomorrow Jim..." His eyes glistened slightly. He'd just found his son, and now he was going again. He'd just got you back in his life, and now you were disappearing again...

"What can I do to make you stay?" His question took you by surprise. Stay?

"Jim, I..."

"I haven't stopped thinking about you.. about what happened 2 years ago. How long I'd wanted you, how long I'd dreamt of you, how I still dream of you even now.. and we share a son y/n.. I can't let you go again, it'd break me.."

"I'm half your age Jim! I'm barely older than your eldest child, how can this possibly work?" He answered with a kiss. Leaning forward to take your mouth against his, without thinking you returned it, linking your fingers with his as he pulled you into his lap.

"It'll work because we'll make it work.. nothing else matters.. all of that other stuff is irrelevant.." he felt you grind your hips against his and his erection was burning against his jeans. He needed you, now.

"And Danielle?"

"Is fucking a man old enough to be her own father - opinion invalid. I don't care about her, I care about you.. please.." he was aware of how desperate he sounded but he didn't care. He had his hand under your t-shirt against your breast, no bra in the way this time. Lifting you up, he carried you upstairs to the guest room you were staying in, and laid you down softly on the bed underneath him.

"Birth control?" He looked at you, smiling.

"The coil - don't worry, I'm covered this time.." You smiled back as he lifted your t-shirt over your head and kissed you again. The reason for being at the pharmacy 2 years ago was to collect your prescription for the pill - you'd not taken it for a couple of days after running out suddenly. After Jackson was born, you switched to a more efficient form of birth control.

Pulling your skirt down and off, along with your underwear, he nestled his face between your thighs, now parted by his hands.

"I want you to watch me y/n... Watch me as I make you cum..." Your core burning, you raised yourself up on your elbows as he blew a hot breath against your wet folds, causing you to shiver under him. He parted your lips with his fingers, before licking from your pulsing hole up to your clit, finding a rhythm that made you cry out and shudder underneath his tongue. Smiling, groaning into you, you tried to keep your eyes on him as he licked and sucked your throbbing clit in his mouth.

"Jim.. don't stop.. oh god..." You hadn't had sex since that afternoon 2 year ago, no one being good enough to compete with the man currently buried between your legs. No pleasure you'd given yourself since was a patch on this, and you felt that burning feeling in your stomach starting to rise. "I'm close... Mm... Fuck I'm close..." Your words barely a whisper but he heard them, pushing harder with his tongue as a finger entered you, hooking upwards to find that spot inside, the one you didn't think actually existed, but there it was.. you bucked against his mouth, coming hard and fast - you felt your liquids gush over his chin, there was no stopping them... "Aha... Oh god Jim... Fuck... Stop, it's too much..." He smiled, blowing another warm breath over you before moving back to your mouth. You could taste yourself on his lips, turning you on even more.

Flipping him onto his back, you lifted his clothes off him and kissed down his chest. Your core needed a breather before you took him inside you. Licking the top of his now rock hard cock, you slowly sank your lips down, taking him fully inside your mouth. You'd never had a strong gag reflex, and you enjoyed the feeling of his cock hitting the back of your throat.

"Holy fuck... Jesus y/n... That's it baby..." Up and down your head bobbed, swapping between hard and light sucks, your teeth gently scraping the underside of his cock and your fingers lightly playing with his balls underneath you. Every time you felt them tighten, you'd ease off, allowing him to catch his breath, before bringing him into your mouth again. After a few near explosions, he couldn't take anymore and lifted you off motioning for you to sit on him. "Ride me y/n..." You smiled, and sank your pussy onto him, allowing him to fill you. Slowly so as to adjust to his length, your hips moved, back and forth, up and down, finding the right rhythm for you both. He sat up, chests together and his hands under your thighs as he rotated his hips from underneath, driving his cock against that magical spot again.

"Yes... God that feels good... Jim..."

"I'm not gonna last long y/n..."

"That's okay.. we've got plenty of time to make up for this... Cum in me, give me all of you..." You felt his cock twitch inside you as he moved your hips faster. Leaning back, you rode him hard, the bed frame squeaking underneath as you both cried out, your climaxes arriving simultaneously. Coming back to rest your head against his, you clenched your core once more causing him to gasp as you drew yourself off him slowly. Lay down next to each other, he pulled you into his arms.

"Did you mean what you said?" He asked, kissing your head gently. "Plenty of time?"

"I meant it, Jim... I need to get back to London to sort a few things, put my flat up for sale.. my job... But yes. If you'll have us, we'll come back.." you looked into his eyes. He lifted your head to kiss you and you felt it. All the love you thought you'd never find, in the man you thought you'd never find it with.

Everything was going to be fine, you couldn't wait to start your life over again, this time for the last time.

@margoo0 @queenshelby @peakyscillian @cloudofdisney @ntmynouis @being-worthy

[fictionwordcounts]

Home [Anakin x Reader]

Word Count: 2000+

Summary: You're on the desolate planet of Dagobah, and things are a far less than exciting. However, someone crashing close to your home changes everything.

Requested on Wattpad.com at StarkWars084

You were whittling away at a stubborn piece of wood when you saw a ship of some sort fall from the sky not far away. You jumped up from the small chair you had made and examined the smoke trail in awe. Nothing exciting ever happened on this disgusting swamp planet and you absolutely had to go to the crash sight.

Smiling to yourself, you climbed down your tree house and headed off in the direction of the crashed, mysterious object. Wading through the thick mud was easy and you started walking a ways off, but stopped suddenly. You reached toward your back only to grasp empty air-- you'd left your weapon at home. You were furious with yourself for forgetting such an important tool. The planet you were on was nowhere shy of dangerous creatures. Looking over at a large stick on the ground, you decided it would have to do. You grasped it tightly and continued on until you found a broken ship submerged in quick sand. If anyone was alive in there, they certainly weren't now. It was a shame too. You were hoping to find someone (You didn't care who) to make life more interesting. You would have settled for anything in fact.

The sand prevented you from investigating closer, but it was just as amazing from where you were. Sure you had seen ships before, but that was a long time ago, before you came here. The ship was swallowed up quickly by the hungry sand and you strained to see the last bit of the tail disappear. You were about to leave when you noticed footprints leading off from where the plain had been. A sound from behind you made you jump, and you spun around with your makeshift weapon in hand. A man with shoulder-length dark hair and clothes caked in sand stood there. His eyes were kind and calm despite the large stick only inches from his face.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you," he stated. Even if it wasn't his intention, he had scared you a great deal, and you found yourself unable to lower the stick. He slowly raised his hands and started pushing the weapon down, and you let him since you couldn't do it yourself.

"Who are you?" You asked him once you had found your voice.

"It's alright, I'm Anakin Skywalker. I'm a Jedi, and I can help you off this planet," he answered. "I could take you as far as Coruscant, if you like."

You bit your tongue and changed your mind. I'm not okay with anything! you decided, I wanted anything but a Jedi. The Jedi were the people you had tried to escape in coming here. You had thought you wanted to be one at one time, but they had rejected you when you had failed their ridiculous trials. Now there was one here, though you had chosen to live on one of the most remote planets you could find. You were angry with him though you knew it was not him alone that had denied you the position.

"Well, I'm very glad you've found a way to get home," you said, trying to maintain a steady voice. "You can do so alone. I wish you luck." With that, you spun around and headed back to the home you had made. Sloshing footsteps and swinging branches told you that he was stumbling right behind.

"Hold on!" He called after you. You were nearly running, and you would've kept going, but this was the only social interaction you would get for who knew how long. You rolled your eyes and slowed so he could catch up. "It's dangerous out here alone," he warned.

You slowly turned around and rolled your eyes. "Is it?" you scoffed and took in a deep breath while you tried to get your thoughts together. "Listen, I do appreciate the offer, but I have no interest in heading back to anywhere the Jedi Council is."

"What do you mean back?" he questioned. "You mean you've been there before?"

You glared at him. "Do the Jedi now find things easy to forget?" you felt yourself shaking and tried desperately to stand completely still. You're not mad at him, you told yourself. You knew you shouldn't be mad at all, but it grew more difficult the more he spoke.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what you're talking about," Anakin apologized. "But at least let me take you to a safer, more populated planet." You almost laughed now.

Gesturing to land around, you responded, "Even if I wanted to leave, how would we?" Anakin looked around.

"I'd find a way," He insisted. You knew there was really nothing he could do, but you liked his determination.

Still, you weren't sold on the idea of returning. "Well," you started hesitantly. "If you're going to find a way back, you'll need a place to stay." You gestured for him to follow you. He was surprisingly good at navigating through the mud. He knew exactly where to step and where not to. You guessed it was the Force showing him the way. It had for you, too, before you memorized the land. When you got to the lake that was not far from your tree house, you made Anakin scrub off all the sand off his arms and neck.

When you made it back to your home you showed Anakin the way up the tree. "You built this?" He asked you once he was at the top.

You nodded proudly. "It took me a while, but it finally came together." You ran your hand across the railing you had put up. You were rather proud of your work and had a right to be. It was sturdy and homely which was perfect for where you lived. "You could probably stay just outside my kitchen for now. Tomorrow I'll have to make a proper bed for you."

Anakin nodded to show he understood then looked questioningly at you. "If I'm going to stay here, I need to know your name."

You had completely forgotten to introduce yourself! You scolded yourself inwardly. "Y/N," you told him.

He smiled "Thank you for offering your home to me, Y/N" You knew he was just being polite. He wouldn't have the comfort of a bed like the one you had made, and you couldn't make one now. You didn't have the items you would need, and it was getting too dark to gather any.

"I recommend you don't leave the house until dawn," you suggested. "The creatures here love the dark."

"I wont," he assured you. Even though he was a Jedi, you knew you couldn't leave him to figure that out on his own.

You would help him the best you could. You didn't hate him. In fact, you found it hard to dislike him. But it was impossible to ignore his title: Jedi. Just thinking the name made you shudder.  You wished him a good night, and Anakin took his robe off and lay down on one of your pillows. He pulled the robe over himself to stay warm and you went to your moss bed. It was actually a nice, comfortable bed that took you a while to complete. You looked over at Anakin who was still awake, staring up at the sky, and your stomach twisted. He wanted to go home, but you couldn't help him do that. The best you could do was make sure he didn't freeze, starve, or get killed by ravenous animals, so that's what you would do. You would keep him alive until he could get back home.

________________________________________________________________________________

You woke up earlier than usual and dressed quickly. You decided to go hunting in hopes of finding some meat to balance out the root stew you would make. As you slipped the cotton shirt over your head, you realized that you didn't have any extra clothes for Anakin to change into, and his clothes were still covered in mud that had dried over. Surely, it wasn't a comfortable way to live. You walked over to Anakin who was fidgeting and stirring in his sleep. You would have to make him a change of clothes as soon as possible.

You grabbed your spear and knife and climbed down the tree easily. You wanted to do this quickly so you could start working on the other projects Anakin's arrival had made for you. You waited at some rocks near the lake with your knife in hand. Nudj, you knew, were lizard-like creatures that stayed around this area. You had only killed a few before, but they weren't bad. When a brave nudj climbed the rocks you quickly threw your knife and pierced it's skin. It thrashed for a second before falling still. You knew the alarm it let out would warn the others and keep you from getting anymore from there. You retrieved the knife and nudj and headed to a different patch of rocks. You repeated this pattern four more times until you had three of the lizards to take back. You jogged back to the tree and climbed up. Anakin was awake.

"Good morning," you called to him. His face was pale and there were beads of sweat on his forehead. "Are you okay?"

He nodded. "Yes, I'm fine." You looked him over worriedly. Treating disease was not something you could cram into today. Deciding to leave him be, you started preparing a stew from roots herbs and the nudj you caught earlier. Anakin came up to you and watched for a little bit.

You turned to him while the stew cooked. "Have you figured out how you'll be getting back?" you questioned.

He shook his head. "No, I haven't, but I'll find a way," he answered confidently. Surely he knew he wouldn't be able to. The only thing that flew on the planet were the bogwings, and you didn't want to mess with them.

"I'll have to make you a change of clothes," you told him. "I'll do that after we eat." You turned back to the food and stirred it.

"Thank you," Anakin said. You pointed to a small pot you had sitting by.

"If you're going to stay here though," you announced. "You'll have to help and boil some of that water."

He smiled and took the full pot to a small fire you had going.

After you and Anakin had finished eating, you walked over to a bin where you kept thread and fabric. You hadn't expected to use it really so you were happy you found a use for it. You sent Anakin to wash the dishes, but it didn't keep him busy for long. He came to where you were working.

"Tell me about the time you were with the Jedi council," he requested.

You stiffened. Of course, he would be curious, but you didn't want to talk about it. You just wanted him to have a magical solution to leave and do so. You hesitated, trying to play out the conversation in your head.

"When I was younger," you started. "All I wanted to be was a Jedi. I looked up to them and my parents did too." A lump formed in your throat. "They noticed me, finally, and I trained for a long time until I became a Padawan. I wasn't long after that my parents were killed. I couldn't preform as well as they wanted me to. I could only think about them, hoping they would come back. It devastated me, and at times, I even felt resentment--hatred. You know that's not acceptable for Jedi." You inhaled deeply and wiped a tear from your cheek with your fingertips. "They expelled me, and I left. I was angry with the council." You gritted your teeth. "I was angry with Master Yoda."

Anakin looked puzzled. "Master Yoda is very wise," he defended. "I'm sure he had a good reason."

You wiped your face and looked at him reasonably. "Master Yoda has it all wrong," you argued. "There has never once been a Jedi who has kept to the code completely. Our emotions make us human, and those that embrace that are the ones he wants to get rid of. He can't turn us into his mindless, emotionless robots to fight his battles for him."

Anakin was silent. The whole time you were talking your hands were working on the outfit for him.

"But never mind," you attempted a smile. "I finished your outfit." You turned around while Anakin switched his clothes. When he was finished you turned back to see your work. You laughed out loud. The clothes looked absolutely ridiculous. They were baggy and blended into each other making it look like one piece.

"Well, it's a start," he teased, smiling. "At least now I'm not covered in sand from head to toe."

You made a note to yourself to practice your seamstress skills later.

You had just finished the bed for Anakin when the sun sank behind the trees. He slept on it well the first night, but he grew restless from nightmares that not even the most comfortable of beds could fix. You often had to sit by his bed with a cold cloth to calm him. He told you they were of his mother. He had to watch her die over and over again every night and it made him miserable. You did the best you could, but that wasn't much. There were nights when he would wake up suddenly, and you would have to speak quietly and soothingly to him until he could fall asleep again. At first it bothered you, but it troubled you more now.

Anakin had stayed with you for two weeks before a ship landed right next to the lake where you were gathering water one day. You dropped the bucket and ran to the ship. The door opened and a light-haired, bearded man emerged confidently. His eyes were tired but that didn't change how he acted.

"Hello there!" he called to you. "Allow me to introduce myself: I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi. Could you give me a hand with something?" Stunned you nodded and beckoned him forward. "I'm sorry about landing here without permission. I didn't think this planet was populated. I'll leave soon, but I seem to have lost something and I need help finding it," he explained.

"What did you loose?" you asked him, though you could already guess. Obi-Wan looked at you warily.

"His name is Anakin Skywalker."

You froze. When Anakin arrived, the thought that he might have someone looking for him hadn't even occurred to you. He was back at the tree house preparing food for the both of you. You weren't sure if you should get him or not. As if he heard his name called Anakin came running up from behind you.

Obi-Wan perked up. "Anakin!" He called cheerfully. "I'm glad you're alive, Anakin. You had us all worried." Despite the fact that this man had brought Anakin a way home, he didn't look all that happy.

"You shouldn't have come for me, Master." Anakin said. "You could've saved supplies and time going on without me."

"Anakin don't talk like that," Obi-Wan commanded. "You are my friend, and I will not leave you like that."

Obi-Wan looked at you. "I thank you for any help you have given my young apprentice. You will be paid in whatever currency you find acceptable." He turned back to Anakin. "Let's go, Anakin. Master Yoda will be happy to know you're alright."

Your heart sank. Anakin had found a way to leave after all. This is what you wanted. You reminded yourself. Once he's gone, life will be normal again. Boring and normal. You didn't want him to go now, but what could you do? It was Anakin's decision, and he was already following his master. You stood there waiting for the ship to take off, but it never did. In fact the door opened once again and both of them walked out.

"Is everything okay?" You questioned with a small glimmer of hope that the ship might not start. Anakin was looking much happier now and Obi-Wan more upset.

"It appears," Obi-Wan spoke first. "That Anakin will be staying with you," he explained.

You looked at Anakin who was next to you now.

"Are you serious?" you asked quietly, though your heart was beating rapidly.

He looked up at Obi-Wan. "Thank you for your training, Master," he said respectfully. Obi-Wan nodded blankly.

"I don't know what I'll tell the council," he said almost talking to himself.

Anakin smiled. "I'm sure you'll think of something," he assured. Obi-Wan looked up and smiled.

"Yes, well, I'll still have to pay you, Y/N," he said. "I'll go and get whatever supplies you'll need." He looked at Anakin again and laughed. "And good heavens hopefully some proper clothes." You both laughed merrily. You felt wonderful and couldn't stop smiling.

Obi-Wan left and Anakin hugged you tightly.

"You're really staying," you whispered.

He chuckled. "Yes, I am." He pulled away and looked into your eyes. "You were right, Y/N. I shouldn't try to push any emotions aside anymore." He rested his hand on your cheek. "I love you, Y/N." He grabbed your hand. "Let's go home."

[queenxxxsupreme]

Solace-Jim Mason series

Chapter 6

A/N: I miss Jim Mason:( 

Warnings: mentions of sexual assault, brief mentions of drug use, mentions of overdose

Word Count: 4.1k

Summary: Sonny is a rebellious teen. Her dad is a major dick

The next day was Friday, meaning while Jim got to go surfing with my brothers, I got to go dress shopping with Lindsay and Steph. Luckily it didn't take too long and I found a dress I liked st the first shop we went too.

"Do you girls want anything to drink?" Steph asked as she stood up. We were currently laying around the pool in our backyard.

"No thank you, Steph." I shook my head. Lindsay watched her go into the house. The second the sliding glass door was closed, she propped herself up on one elbow and looked at me.

"So how does he kiss?"

"What?" I furrowed my eyebrows together at her.

"Is he a good kisser?"

"Jim? I-I haven't kissed him yet." I sat up, pulling the strap to my black bikini into place.

"What? He was at your house last night until three in the morning, Sonny, and you didn't kiss him?"

"We just talked, Linds." I stood up and moved to check my phone on the table. The boys were just over the hill at the beach but I didn't want to go check on them and look like a stalker.

"So are you dating?" She laid back on the lounge chair.

"No. He hasn't asked me." I frowned a little.

("I really like him, Sonny." Steph smiled at me. I couldn't help the pink that rose to my cheeks as I tried to hide behind the clothing rack separating us. "He's a sweet boy."

"How did Greg do?" Lindsay looked over to Steph for an answer. I locked my jaw, shuffling through a few of the dresses. I was determined to find an expensive dress, knowing dad would be the one to pay for it.

"Worse than I expected him to. But he won't act like that again, Sonny. I promise."

"I won't let him treat Jim like that, Steph." I brought my eyes up to meet hers. "No one deserves to be treated like that. Dad isn't any better than him.")

"You know, Reese never really asked me." Lindsay pointed out.

"Well, he's a dick. I honestly can't stand him."

"Whoa, Sonny." Reese exclaimed as he, Asher, and Jackson made their way up the path. Following behind them was Miles and Jim. "Careful what you say. Jim can hear you."

"I wasn't talk about Jim. I was talking about you."

"I'm a joy to be around." Reese rolled his eyes. I held my middle finger up to him.

The boys settled around the pool, putting their boards up on the privacy fence around the deck. Jim's eyes met mine and he gave me one of his signature little smiles.

"Hi, Sonny." His chestnut hair fell in messy waves across his forehead.

"Hi, Jim."

"Sonny?" Steph called from the door to the house. "There's someone at the front door. He says he's a friend of yours."

"Must have the wrong Sonny. This one doesn't have friends." Jackson said, making Reese snicker. As I passed Jackson to go into the house, I pushed him into the pool. 

"Come inside with me, Jim." I called over my shoulder.

"Hey, Jim!" Steph greeted Jim as she stepped out of the house.

"Hi, Ms. Carlisle."

"Steph is just fine, sweetheart." She put her hand on his shoulder.

I pushed the sliding glass door shut behind Jim.

"Were the boys decent?"

"Yeah, they were a blast." He nodded his head, raking his fingers through his hair. "I can't remember the last time I hung out with people I actually liked."

"That's good to hear." I picked up a shirt that was on the back of the couch and tugged it on. Upon doing so, I realized it was one of Reese's college shirts with a fraternity logo on it. Jim leaned against the island in the kitchen while I went to answer the front door. As I opened the door open, I pulled my red hair out of the collar of the shirt.

My stomach immediately dropped at the sight of Will standing on the front step. A big, disgusting grin was plastered across his lips as he looked me up and down, his eyes lingering on my legs. Reese's shirt only fell down about mid-thigh, leaving my legs visible to his prying eyes.

"Hey, Sonny. I was just in the neighborhood and I wanted to know if you'd be up to come with me to a party tonight over at Tucker Landon's house."

My lips parted but I couldn't find my voice. I could hear the blood rushing in my ears. My fingers were trembling by my sides. How did he know where I lived? Why was he here? Why did he think he had the right to ask me to a party?

"Sonny? You okay?" He furrowed his brows together, stepping towards me. This brought me out of my frozen state. I half-turned to the kitchen, knowing Jim was in there, and tried to close the door, but Will put his hand on the door to stop me. "Hey, I just want to talk-,"

"Is everything okay, Sonny?" Jim moved towards me. My eyes found his and I'm positive he saw the look of absolute panic on my face. His hand reached out for my arm but I let him take my hand instead. "Who is this?" Jim moved me so that I stood halfway behind him. He now served as a barrier between me and the monster that terrorized my dreams.

Will was a half a foot taller than him and easily outweighed him. Will was a jock, a douche-bag in every sense of the word. Jim was slimly built. His muscles were there but they weren't as sharply defined as Will's.

"Who the hell are you?" Will visibly puffed up, clearly not liking the idea of Jim putting himself between me and him.

"Jim." He answered firmly. One of his hands remained by his side, his fingers moving nervously as he watched the larger man. His other hand remained latched to mine. "Who are you?"

"Will Talbot." He held his hand out for Jim. I squeezed Jim's hand, silently begging him not to shake Will's disgusting hand.

"Jim." I rasped. He looked over his shoulder to me. I tugged his hand like a child, urging him to leave.

"I'm sorry, man. Sonny's not feeling up to hanging out right now." Jim shrugged his shoulders before closing the door. Once the door was closed, I was able to lock the deadbolt.

My feet began to take me up the stairs, my heart racing furiously as I shook my head. He knew where I lived.

"Sonny!" Jim called for me.

I only stopped once I was in the center of my room. My head fell back, my eyes slipping shut as a breath escaped my lips. My knees buckled and I would've collapsed to the floor had Jim not been there to catch me. His long arms wrapped around me, catching me just as I was about to hit the floor.

"Shit, Sonny." He cursed, carefully lowering us both to the floor. He rested on his knees and I rested on his lap. I curled my knees to my chin, resting cheek against his bare chest.

"He knows where-He knows where I live." I whispered. I didn't even realize hot tears were trailing down my cheeks until I felt them drip down on to my chest.

"You aren't breathing, angel." Jim murmured gently as he began to rock us both back and forth ever so slightly. "You gotta breathe."

I couldn't find the ability to catch my breath. I was suffocating, choking on an unseen force. Jim took my hand and placed it on his chest so I could feel his heart beating steadily below my palm.

"I'm right here, angel." He whispered into my ear, placing a kiss against my red hair. "I need you to breathe for me, okay?"

I nodded my head and shakily took a small breath. That was the first step. After that, I could begin to catch my breath.

I wasn't sure how long we sat like that but once I managed to breathe the right way, Jim moved to lean against the side of my bed. He still held me in his lap, his arms holding me against his chest. My head was tucked under his chin and my eyes were closed.

"That's him." I whispered, my voice hoarse. "The one I told you about two nights ago."

Jim stiffened up.

"The one who touched you?"

I grimaced at his words.

"Are you going to go to the police?"

"I was high as a freaking kite." I shook my head. "It was weeks ago. It wouldn't do me any good now. Besides, he didn't rape me. He just felt me up. Put his hand down my pants. That's it."

"He doesn't have the right to do that, Sonny. If you don't want him to do that, then he can't."

"He did." I pulled away from Jim and stood to my feet. I raked my fingers through my hair then shook my hands out. "He-He did. And there's nothing anyone can do to change it."

His eyes fell to his hands as I pulled my shirt up to wipe my face. I went over to my closet, feeling the need for a smoke, but at the last minute I decided against it. It was a nasty habit, one I picked up shortly after my sister passed away. I turned and put my back to the door, then slowly sunk down against it. My eyes found Jim, who was watching me with a tender gaze.

"You probably think I'm insane." I whispered softly. "I've got more problems than a crossword puzzle."

He chuckled a little. The smile that cracked across his lips warmed my insides.

"I guess that's what draws me to you." He admitted with a little shrug of his shoulders, raking his fingers through his hair. "You're kinda like me."

I nodded my head softly, looking down at my hands. I never thought of it that way.

A knock on the already opened door to my room caught my attention. It was Reese.

"You two good?" He asked, leaning against the door frame.

"Yeah." I answered him quietly. He nodded and looked to Jim.

"Hey, I don't know if Sonny's mentioned it to you, Jim, but tonight we're all going out to dinner for our parents' anniversary. You should tag along."

"I appreciate, Reese, but I'm gonna have to pass." Jim shook his head. "I've got something already."

"Alrighty. No big deal." Reese looked back to me and flashed me a little smile. "I like him, you know." He pointed to Jim.

"Me too." I bit my bottom lip.

"Good. Come on back downstairs when you're ready." He knew something had happened. I don't think he knew what but he knew something was up.

I watched him disappear from the doorway. Jim stood to his feet and crossed my bedroom, then held his hand out for me. I took his hand and let him pull me to my feet. He embraced me in a hug, his arms wrapping around me in a protective barrier. 

"Are you ready to go back down there?"

"Yeah." I squeezed him tight before letting him go.

***

"You're not funny, Jackson." I pulled myself out of the pool, glaring at my brother through my now drenched red locks that fell into my face.

Just after Jim and I joined everyone out at the pool, Jackson picked me up over his shoulder and jumped into the pool.

"I fucking hate you."

"Language, Sonny." Steph chided from her lounge chair, turning the page in the designer magazine she was reading.

"I freaking hate you."

"Much better."

"Hey, mom?" Reese looked up from his phone. "Can I have some friends over later?"

Asher and Jackson both started to laugh at him.

"Wow, Reese. How old are you?" I pulled the now soaking wet t-shirt off of me and threw it at Reese. He easily dodged the shirt and it landed on the concrete next to him. I gathered my hair over one shoulder and moved to sit on the lounge chair beside Jim.

"You gonna ask mom if she can tuck you in later on too–Hey!" A high-pitched yelp escaped Jackson's lips as he ducked a swing from Reese.

"Of course you can, Reese." Steph answered him. "Are they joining us for dinner?"

"No, no." Reese shook his head. "They're gonna come over afterwards. I was thinking we could have a fire or something out back."

"What about you, Jim?" Steph turned her attention to him. "Are you joining us for dinner?"

"No, ma'am, Mrs. Carlisle." Jim shook his head, brushing down his brunet locks. "Me and my sister have this thing."

"Maybe next time."

***

"How was dinner?"

"About as good as it could've gone." I sighed gently as I walked into my room. I left the door open with plans of leaving shortly. "Dad didn't talk to me the whole night, but I'm not complaining."

"I'm sorry, Sonny."

"Don't apologize, Jim." I shook my head. "You did nothing wrong."

I shrugged out of my cardigan, leaving me in just a thin strapped silk black tank top and a pair of faded skinny jeans.

"Did you have fun with Medina?"

"Yeah. I think it did us good to hang out."

"That's good, Jim."

"Yeah. She said something funny that kinda got me thinking."

The sound of someone shouting from outside caught my attention. I went over to the balcony doors and pushed them open. Reese and a half dozen of his friends were gathered around a fire, laughing at something.

"What did she say?"

"She said that there's a light in my eyes that she hasn't seen in a long time. She said she thinks it's because of you."

I paused for a moment, my fingers slowly brushing through my hair.

"Aw, she said that?"

"Yeah." I could hear the smile on his voice.

"She's so sweet." I messed with the necklace that dangled between my breasts. My eyes flickered back down to Reese and his friends. The back porch light was on and this gave me the ability to see some of the guys. I only recognized Lindsay, Reese, and Will. "Will?”

"What?"

"Will." I whispered, quickly taking steps back into my room. I almost tripped over my sketch book in the floor. The balcony doors were slammed shut and I locked them. "He-He's here, Jim. Why the hell is he here?"

"Shit, Sonny. I'm on my way over."

"No. No. I-I'm-I'm not staying here. I'm not. I can't." I shook my head.

"I'll come get you."

"Please hurry." I rushed to pack a bag, stuffing different articles of clothing into my backpack. "Just please don’t-don't hang up, Jim."

"I'm not going anywhere, angel."

The new nickname he'd given me just earlier that day made my heart soar. I gripped my phone tighter as I threw my backpack over my shoulder and slammed the to my room door shut.

"Where is he?"

"Outside."

I made my way down the stairs. I wasn't going to stay in the house. I'd wait outside for Jim. I thought I was going to make it too. I could see the front door. It was right there. But a hand clasped around my arm and stopped me.

"Where do you think you're going?" Dad asked me.

"To-To a friend's house, dad." I looked over his shoulder to see Reese and Will coming in through the back door. "Please." I looked back to dad.

"Lindsay's here. She's the only friend you go to."

"Dad, let me-just let me go!" I tried to yell but it came out as a broken whisper. I tugged my arm until he released me. "Let me go, dad." I blinked the tears away, allowing them to trail down my cheeks as I shook my head. His hand released me, a look of pain crossing his face. 

I couldn't look at him as I opened the front door and darted out into the night. I knew he was hurting right now, I know he missed who I used to be. But she was gone. She died four months ago with Summer.

“Sonny? Are you still there?” Jim’s voice in my ear pulled me back to reality.

“Yeah, Jim.”  I murmured quietly, sniffling as I wiped my cheeks. “How long do you think you’ll be?”

“Less than ten minutes.”

***

Due to Mrs. Mason’s.... nature, Jim had to sneak me into his house.

He closed the door to his room and played music. It sounded like a mix of 80s and 90s rock hits. I smiled a little. He had good taste.

I put my backpack down by his closet and kicked my shoes off. I threw myself down on to Jim's bed, bringing my knees to my chest.

"I can't believe I told him that, Jim." I cried quietly. Jim climbed into the bed next to me and laid on his side facing me. He brushed my red hair back out of my eyes. His hand came to rest on my cheek.

"What are you talking about, Sonny?" He quietly asked.

"Dad." I put my hand on his hand that was on my cheek. There were no tears in my eyes because they were trailing down my face. "I told him.... Jim, I told him to let me go. That's the last thing my mother ever told him. I-I can still hear their argument."

I squeezed my eyes shut as tight as possible, their harsh words echoing in my head. 

("You can't leave, Nicki! What the hell am I suppose to do without you?"

"I'm not leaving forever, Greg. I just-I need to get away. I want to be here for you and for Jackson and Emerson and Miles but I-I-I need a break, okay?"

"A break?" Dad couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Just let me go, Greg, damn it!" Mom was exasperated, exhausted, and out of breath from fighting dad. "Just let. Me. Go.")

"I didn't mean to say it, Jim." I shook my head, pushing myself into a sitting position. He sat up too and pulled me into his arms.

"It's okay, Sonny." He tucked my head underneath his chin.

"He's going to hate me."

"No, no, he won't, angel." He assured me, his hand rubbing my arm.

***

I stayed in his arms for what felt like hours, and he was okay with that. He held me, occasionally kissing the top of my head and brushing circles into my arm with his thumb.

I couldn't believe I'd only known this guy only four days. Four days and I felt like I'd known him my entire life. I was comfortable with him in a way that I never felt comfortable with anyone else before. Four days, and we'd almost kissed once. I had kissed his cheek a handful of times and he had kissed my cheek or my hand more than I could count. He knew automatically how to calm me down earlier today. He stopped my panic attack before it got too bad, before I could make myself pass out.

Jim lifted his head from where he rested upon mine and sat up a little straighter. I noticed this and pulled my head away from him.

"What?" I asked him. He looked down at me with a little smile on his lips.

"This was the song you were singing when I woke up."

I looked over to the stand his phone was on. Sweet Child O' Mine was playing. I didn't remember that I had been singing the song out loud or even that that was what I was listening to.

"You sounded beautiful." He leaned forward to rest his forehead against mine. His chestnut curls tickled my forehead. I giggled softly, reaching up to swipe them away.

"I was singing it?" I crinkled my eyebrows together, wincing internally. He nodded his head. "I'm sure that was a great sound to wake up to."

"You sounded great."

"You're just saying that."

"Oh, yeah. Definitely." He nodded his head, a grin cracking across his lips. He was teasing me.

His fingers began to tickle my sides. I fought to get away, climbing out of his lap and across the bed but he was quick. His hands grabbed my hips and pulled me back to him. Somehow, he managed to get me pinned beneath him. The hand that wasn't holding him up tickled my side. A loud laugh escaped my lips. His hand covered my mouth, his eyes darting over to the door. We both froze for a second, waiting for his mother to come barging in. When she didn't, he looked back to me.

"You have to be quiet, Sonny." He hushed me with a little laugh. I rolled my eyes at him and tugged his hand away from my mouth. 

“Maybe if you weren’t trying to tickle me, we wouldn’t have to worry.” I gazed up at him, searching his blue eyes as I spoke. His smile somehow made all the problems I had disappear. It made me forget. I thought that that was just something they said in rom-coms. 

I reached up to brush his brown hair back, but my efforts were useless. With how he was laying over top of me, his hair had no choice but to fall down. His beautiful blue eyes flickered down to my lips as he slowly lowered himself down to me. My heart began to race. His hand came up to cup my cheek, his thumb brushing my skin as his lips finally met mine. 

His lips were soft and gentle, and he tasted like peppermint. My hand slipped around his waist and across his back. From there, I could pull him down on to me. I didn’t want to feel anything but him. One of his knees rested between my thighs and his hands held most of his upper body weight off of me but I didn’t mind the pressure. I didn’t mind him. I actually sort of liked it. I was engulfed in him, his scent, his taste, his touch. 

My phone buzzed in the back pocket of my jeans. He must’ve felt it too because he pulled away, breaking our kiss. 

“I’m not answering it.” I shook my head, resting my head back against the mattress as I looked up to him. He moved to lay alongside me. I took his hand and laced our fingers together. “It’s just my dad.”

He nodded his head a little. He kept his eyes on me as I brushed my thumb over his knuckles. 

“You said earlier that what Medina said got you thinking.” I turned to face him, tucking one arm underneath my head. “Thinking about what?”

Jim was silent for a few moments. He rolled over on to his back to look at the ceiling. 

“I.... I overdosed before.” He explained quietly. He brought his hand up to rub his face. “I went straight back to using the second I got out of the hospital. I used whatever I could get my hands on. This time was different though. I... I didn’t use right away. It wasn’t until the other day when we were suppose to go surfing that I took anything. Medina thinks it’s because of you.”

“Do you think it’s because of me?” I sat up, brushing my hair over one shoulder, and turned to face him with my legs criss-crossed. He propped himself up on one elbow and half-ass shrugged his shoulders. 

“I mean.... I don’t know. I think you’re cute.”

My cheeks flushed. I looked down as I shyly smiled. 

“That’s not what I asked.” I shook my head a little, looking up at him through my lashes. “Jim, I-I’m glad I can do that for you, that I can help you stop taking whatever shit you were taking before. But I’m not enough. Medina said you need professional help.”

“Therapist.” He muttered, sitting up and moving to lean against the wall. This put space between us. 

“There’s nothing wrong with needing therapy, Jim.” I shook my head. “I had to go to therapy after my sister died.” Without even thinking, I rubbed the scar under my right collarbone. 

“What happened to her?” He asked softly. I looked down, blinking a few times as I tried to think of the best way to describe that night.

“We-We were out at a party. She had just turned twenty. It was.... It was three in the morning. I don’t know what happened.” I shook my head. I had never read the police reports or asked dad about what he learned. “I was on my phone in the passenger seat. Summer.... Summer was driving. When I looked up, there was someone in the road. She swerved to miss them and tipped the car over.” My voice cracked like I was going to cry but there were no tears in my eyes. I rubbed my thigh, remembering where I had seen the metal rod sticking through her leg. “She bled out before anyone could save her.” My fingers trembled as I reached up to brush my hair back. 

“That’s awful, Sonny. I’m so sorry.”

I gave him a forced smile and nodded my head.

“You’d think that after all I’ve been through, dad would take it easy on me. But he still gives me shit about every little thing I do.”

“At least your dad talks to you.” Jim muttered. “Mine won’t even answer the phone.”

I looked down at my hands. The ugly scar across my knuckles made my stomach churn.

“I know I’m not your dad and you’ve.... you’ve only known me a few days, but I’ll answer the phone when you call.” I met his gaze. The smile that crossed his lips made my heart race. 

“You mean it?”

“Of course I do.” I nodded. “You’re cute too, by the way.”

His cheeks flushed and he rolled his eyes at me.