#i'm number one [dva]

[strawberrysamara]

"Omg why no role queue in 6v6??" bc no one plays tank. "Omg we should go back to 6v6, it's so much better" I used to queue DPS in quick play so I would have something to break up my math homework. "I would play tank if we went back to 6v6" statistically speaking, no, you wouldn't.

[txttletale]

Now I'm curious about the 2cp thing on overwatch. Please talk about it I love reading your takes on those

2cp was an awful gamemode for a bunch of reasons that primarily boil down to stuff about how spawn points work. so in 2cp you've got two points, point a and point b. defenders spawn right by point b, attackers spawn closer to a. if attackers take a, then attacker spawns move forward and they can try to take point b

the practical effect of this is that holding point a is extremely difficult -- you spawn a good map distance away if you die on defense, so if the attackers can get a pick they can almost always take it (overwatch is an incredibly team-dependent game, numbers advantages in teamfights are enormous and trump nearly everything else unless there's major ult or skill disparities).

now the thing is that the winners of a fight probably did more damage and healed more during that fight, so it's very common for the attacking team to then simply be have an ult advantage and be able to run over to point b and roll over the newly respawning defending team. this is a brutal snowball effect that is really oppressive and miserable to play against as defenders.

& now the absolute worst thing that can happen here--especially common at lower levels of play--is for one defender to be 'staggered' (ie, die a while after the others) during or immediately after point a being captured. this means that on top of a probable ult advantage, the attackers have a numbers advantage. very frustratingly this is very likely to happen when one of your teammates decides they are going to heroically go and 1v6 the enemy team while the point is 99% captured--unless you're communicating and coordinating there is no way to stop someone from dooming your team with a play like that. even in higher level play where nobody would do something so silly there's ways for attackers to deliberately stagger enemies (a very famous one is popping dvas mech and slowly meleeing baby dva to death)

HOWEVER, if this snowball doesn't happen, the fact that point b spawns are right next to the point leads to another very obnoxious play pattern--stalling. it is nearly impossible unless you get off ap erfect 6-man ult combo to wipe the whole defending team in such a way that you can take point before one of them respawns and jumps on it. there's no point capture progress at all as long as one defender is still on the point, so (and this was true at higher levels, where people were better at stalling, and at lower levels, where people were worse at killing stallers) the defending team will all swap onto heroes with strong defensive or mobility-heavy kits and just run around the point like headless chickens trying to stall capture until more teammates respawned--and because the attacker spawns are so far from the point by comparison, getting even one kill during the staling process can swing a decisively won fight back around into a loss. i've seen games where the attackers win a fight on point b with 2+ minutes to spare and then the defending team stalls until overtime. just truly mind-numbing tedious toxic play patterns encouraged by the map design

and to top it all off, point capture progress only 'counts' for tiebreaking if you get more than 33%--which means that if you, as the first attackers during the first or any tiebreaker rounds, don't manage to get to 33% capture progress on point A, you can be left in a situation where it's impossible to win and you're playing for a draw--truly the most demoralizing experience imaginable, some of the least fun i've ever had playing video games. im so glad they blew it up

[lunoval]

Overwatch... oh Overwatch.

Overwatch lore was good. Overwatch lore is bad. These are unfortunate truths, but what caused this change?

In the OW1 era, the lore was part of the reason the game gained its popularity. Putting aside the gooner aspects that (massively) boosted the game's numbers, most fans interacted with the lore via YT cinematics. I don't have to beat the drum on this point, it has been said many, many times before. They were good. Same with; we don't get cinematics anymore, and what we do get, never moves the story /forward./

But, I think it would be too easy to blame the lack of lore on the downfall of the company, or perhaps even whatever is left of the development team.

It's because they kept adding Heroes. Even before OW1 fully fell off, the issue began when Wrecking Ball was added to the game, with a completely missed opportunity for a compelling narrative. (Wrecking Ball’s DISLIKE for humans, opposed to Winston’s fondness for them.)

The lore of Overwatch has stagnated with our growing roster. The number of characters is now bloated to the point that telling a compelling narrative, providing entertaining content, having good storytelling, becomes highly difficult, if not impossible. 

Set aside the understandable economic reasons that the company running the game needed to keep releasing characters, to keep players numbers up while they still can. Those reasons are valid, and not what I want to focus on.

Overwatch lore can't move forward until the developers either A, Split up the group, scatter them across the globe into teams (so scenes have fewer characters present)  or B, Decide who the main character, or at least main cast, of the franchise is.

A - Splitting Everyone Up - The Overwatch 2 Announcement Cinematic was fun as heck to witness. The other 3D cinematics suck. Where half of the time, half of the characters visible on screen just stand awkwardly like extras, occasionally piping up with voice lines that resemble all previous dialogue. Splitting people up, sending characters on missions, would give opportunity for NEW interactions between these characters. It feels like each one of them only exists in a ‘cluster’ of adjacent Heroes, without meeting any new ones. Has D.VA met Junkrat? What does Bastion think of Genji? What does Zenyatta think about Zarya? What does Lucio think about working with Symmetra? Seeing these characters stand in a room, with confirmed issues with each other, without getting to witness any of their personality is boring, and the porn had better writing.

B - So many characters. So, so many plot threads. I'm not going to try and list them all, I'm just going to tell you the questions I have. Off the dome.

Are we going to get any in-universe explanation for the more magic-ky stuff, or are we just taking the actual magic ghost dragons at face value?

Will DVa choose to prioritize protecting her country, or dedicating herself to Overwatch?

Will Reaper and Soldier ever kis-

What did Moira do to Widowmaker exactly/any hope for saving her?

How are Sigma’s powers and the Iris connected?

Anymore information on that mystery group Sombra is after? 

Why/How is Bastion sentient/thinking?

Will the rest of the world ever clean up the radioactive Australia?

This is all just to name a FEW of the potential directions this story could go.. It's a dense world, with a lot I enjoy. That's the sad part for me. Overwatch is, honestly, an IP truly possible for many shades of quality production, that blends a lot of genre’s… decently enough. The robot sci-fi gritty narrative with the Omnics and the humans. Hints of fantasy, or incomprehensible science, with the more powerful/harder to believe abilities or powers. The existence of ‘old gods’ being functionally confirmed with the release of Illari. All of Australia; the entire continent was left radioactive, and could easily fit Mad Max-style escapades. A good old fashioned shootout. Actual ninjas. Rescue missions. The changing of the guard, old Overwatch handing the reins over to the new, younger members.

Good things, cool things, we will likely never see from any company that ever gets their hands on the IP. The personal narratives for each Hero are either completely stagnant(Sorry, but Winston) or barely existed (Baptiste,Sojourn,Junker Queen, Life Weaver), or are only relevant because of ties to another character that’s more relevant. (Wrecking Ball-Winston, Ashe-Cassidy, Echo, Kiriko-Hanzo/Gengi, Illari, Mauga). Venture, Juno, and Freyja are newer characters that I don’t want to hold to the same standard, but I doubt it’s going to change.

I understand that because it’s an FPS, how can they ‘move the plot forward’(with any real stakes of death)  if they don’t want to change the main game, but then they never should’ve brought up any sort of story mode. OW was always building up a compelling narrative, if you try to tell me they bailed on what could’ve been an absolute beast of interwoven modern story telling because they felt scared to bend the rules, I call chicken shit. Kill Reinhardt off in the lore, and keep him in the game. 

But, such is the way this stuff goes. Anyways, imma go search up sojourn thighs on twitter. If this gets even 5 notes, I’ll put out all my thoughts on potential plot threads for all the characters we have, all the fun ways this plot COULD move forward. Hell, maybe I’ll write the story I want to see myself.

[textsfromwatchpointgibraltar]

Swole-yatta got buff bc he's the only one pushing the payload

DAMN RIGHT

[carnyreborn]

DVa and DMon have been rivals for as long as they could remember, competing every chance they get. Now they're latest competition involves their boyfriend Roadhog and his huge dick, now it's time to see who can get impregnated by him first!

"No, you gotta get me pregnant!" Hana is the one who starts, complaining loudly towards the hog. "You're my teammate, and as such, my cunt is the one that is the most proper to be fucked right now!" She says, the three of them naked, D.Va and D.Mon rubbing their cunts onto Roadhog's gigantic log that he calls a cock.

"Shut up" Usually DMon and Hana Song get along rather well. They are partners and they just... enjoy each other's presence and they do spend time having fun. But now, they are rivals. Rivals to be the first one to get dicked, given that they've been sharing Roadhog for some time now. "You spend a lot of time with him in missions and more. I'm the one who has to be fucked first."

All the while, Roadhog is just watching those two slutty girls, trying not to judge them too harshly. After all, he knows how girls can get after tasting his cock, after feeling him stretching their insides and getting them hooked onto his hog shaft. "You two calm down." He mutters, his voice harsh and gruff, the two women quickly shutting up. The Diva and the Demon, two of the sexiest Korean women, are known for their huge fan bases... and acting all slutty towards a fat bastard known as Roadhog. "Now, the two of you, I want to watch your twerking." His order is quite direct, and the two girls knew that was coming. He orders them around without hesitation and while he enjoys them competing, he prefers them to focus on pleasing him not fighting among themselves.

"O-Of course, sir~" D.Va is the first one who replied, with them getting off his lap, with D.Mon following right behind. The two Korean bitches start with their routine, something they're already used to. Both their fat behinds jiggling, as their hands move to their knees, their backs arch, a perfect form. It has been months of training, and the Hog is very satisfied with the results. But in the end, both girls in their hearts knew who he would choose, after admiring them jiggling their butts, after speaking them and just grunting while his throbbing cock leaks his virile pre-cum.

"Alright Hana, get right in front of me. D.Mon, on your knees, suck my nuts." He orders as he stands up, grabbing with his huge hands and holding her ahead of himself, the mushroom head of his cock rubbing against her willing pussy. D.Mon sighs, but she knows Hana is his favourite. She's the one he takes around as a pocket pussy, after all. Not that she minds too much, she is still fucked often enough to go dumb for all the time she wants, so in the end, it doesn't matter. Or so she tells herself as she gets on her knees, his hairy musky balls. And once she starts sucking his cum filled tanks... it really doesn't~

Hana is shaking, waiting for the fucking, before the happy moan that follows, her pussy clamping down around his shaft, something both of them are already quite familiar with. However, this time, the Hog isn't holding back at all on his fucking of the slutty girl.

He doesn't give her time to breathe or time to relax. He just pushes himself as deep as he can go inside of her pussy, reaching her womb and even making a small bulge appear on her flat pale belly. Hana's eyes go crossed up, as she just barely holds back her orgasm. "Hah... little piggy is already feeling good, huh?" Roadhog teases her and she is feeling so much pleasure that even trying to answer him, taking her focus from her body for a moment will trigger an orgasm. "And you down there, slutty pig number two? Feeling good?" He wonders as the sloppy mouth of the other soldier feels great around his balls too, the feeling of the drool dripping from his testicles, his cum factories being worshipped... that feels great.

It takes quite a bit of time for Roadhog to be done. He grunts and pounds, Hana squeals and moans and D.Mon pants and slurps, and in that lewd symphony until he gives out a louder grunt. It's not he who warns but D.Mon who shouts 'he's coming' to Hana. She embraces it and braces herself, ready for what's to come... as her womb is directly flooded with his virile cum, with her knowing, 100% for sure, with the time of the month and how much he has filled her... she has a baby in. Guaranteed.

She has won the contest, but as the Hog pulls back, his cock still hard, she lays down at the bed as D.Mon is brought up and pinned under his body as he just moves on to fucking her. The two of them might've started competing, but now... they'll be joined into carrying his babies. And they couldn't be any happier~

[bushelofmuses]

//had like, three matches in a row last night with an enemy player—who sent me an FR afterwards—but in the first game on Hollywood, they were playing hog and kept hooking and one-shotting me.

I finally wrote in the chat "hog pls...have mercy on me."

They actually fucking apologized and only killed me once more on accident after that, and then apologized again for it in the chat.

The hog also hooked me later that actually got me away from I think an enemy DVa bomb??? And I'm sitting here thinking, "oml my hero" and spammed thanks.

Tanks, I love y'all.

Some of the least toxic of the three classes in the game. Usually. If any of them are toxic I think it's mostly Zaryas or Reins??? It's been close to a year since I've played and I only picked up the game again in the last two or three weeks, so I can't remember.

Anyway, I can probs count on one hand the number of times I've had rude roadhogs.

Y'all are gifts. Want me to get you a gift certificate to a spa for a massage bc your backs must be killing you from carrying the teams...

[mysteryprof]

Do you have any tips or strats for Hanzo that some players might not know? I'm a Mercy main with 300+ hours on her but I recently started playing Hanzo a lot (with maybe 26 hours on him now?) and I feel like I could be doing better.

I DO!

I HAVE A WHOLE GUIDE

hopefully this helps you o uo)/

- Last Updated: 5/29/19 -

A lot of stuff is gonna sound really basic here, but I want to cover EVERYTHING and approach it like playing for the first time

Sensitivity: > PC- I personally play Hanzo on 6.8, but that’s all dependent on the DPI of your mouse (different number determines how well your mouse is gonna respond to your sensitivity is kinda the best way I can explain it??) and your own preference. For example, I have a very basic Logitech M510 mouse with 1000 DPI (Sidenote: I recommend a mouse with side buttons if you don’t already have one). Another Hanzo Main friend of mine has a 1600 dpi mouse and plays at either 4 or 5, but like I said, whatever works for you; whatever helps you track moving enemies better outside of the technical jargon. A solid sensitivity will really let you get used to landing Flick Shots. > Console - I play on PC only, but from what I’ve heard it’s best to just set his sensitivity on both the horizontal and vertical axis to max. 

Primary Fire- Hanzo’s arrows are Projectile, not Hitscan.- HITSCAN DEFINITION: Characters that have Hitscan have no travel time for their weapon. As in, as soon as you fire the crosshair over someone, you’re hitting them. That’s why characters such as Soldier 76 and McCree (even though he has Falloff Damage) are great counters to Pharah.- In Hanzo’s case, you’ll be aiming at where people are GOING TO MOVE instead of ON them. Lead your shots; let them run into the arrow. You’re golden once you get used to- something like a Tracer’s blink pattern. Even better would be getting familiar with Recall and being able to tell where she’ll reappear. Prediction is key.- I’ve noticed that a lot of Genjis like to go into a Swift Strike at the end of their Deflect… The timing is super tight, but you can land the killing headshot right before they hit you.- The ultimate test of leading your shots is against flying Pharahs. You gotta give quite a bit of leeway with them depending on the distance; it takes quite a bit of practice. I personally kinda picture Pharah as a box and you wanna shoot at her corners depending on if she’s ascending or dropping; more often than not it’ll be at her feet. Storm Arrow should make tracking her a little easier now.

Flick Shots- I honestly recommend looking up a video on these; it’s a lot easier to understand if you see it in action- Here’s a really good post my friend made about them- Flick Shots are far more viable on PC. It’s a lot harder on console even when both horizontal and vertical sensitivities are maxed for Hanzo.- Not much I can give advice on these for except: practice, practice, practice. Start yourself on the bots in the Practice Range, then move up to AI.

Storm Arrow- Great if you wanna just chip at the enemy team if they’re in a cluster- WORKS AMAZING WITH GRAVITON SURGE; follow up with after Dragonstrike if you want absolute overkill- Absolutely use it to chip away at barriers- A Bastion in turret form’s worst nightmare; a full volley will kill them- The temptation to spam all six shots when being confronted/in a panic is high, but you’ll do better if you take the time to focus and aim- The amount of damage a full volley can do through Amplification Matrix is delightfully disgusting. 840 Damage. >:3c

Sonic Arrow- Its radius is 9 meters- Go for unexpected Headshots when people come running around the corner.- It’s a good idea to always a Sonic Arrow up whenever you can; it benefits everyone for possible ult coordinations when the enemy groups up to make pushes.- You can catch invisible Sombras running through with a Sonic Arrow as long as she stays within its range.

Lunge- Just moving towards a point and using Lunge when available will get Hanzo there a little faster than normal walking- Get hooked? Lunge backwards. Incoming Death Blossom? Lunge. Deadeye? Lunge to cover.  - Lunge can be combined with wall climb. If you’re climbing and haven’t reached the max height, you can lunge to another surface and finish climbing up that. - Lunge lets Hanzo get around his sniper perches with much better efficiency… Like, there are some crazy corner jumps he can make now without having to hop on the ground and climb back up on the other side.

Dragonstrike- One of the most important things to know about Dragonstrike is that it’s still a projectile arrow when fired for a quick second before it turns into Dragons. This is why Genji can deflect it and Dva can absorb it with her Defense Matrix if you are close range.- The Dragons are no longer effected by Nano or any other damage boosting ability. - This one is a bit irrelevant, but it doesn’t hurt to know that Dragonstrike does 200 damage per second and has INFINITE RANGE.- Combo with Zarya or Reinhard when you have the chance- tbh you’re probably gonna kill off a Baptiste bc he’ll completely nullify Dragonstrike. DS doesn’t damage the Immortality Field either.- Much like Dva’s Self Destruct, Dragonstrike is a good point clearer to drive the enemy away.- Don’t forget to use Sonic Arrows to see if you’re viable for a good cluster of kills because half the time you’ll be shooting that bad boy through a wall. Keep it up whenever you can.- Honestly? lead a little bit with Dragonstrike bc people are gonna either see or sense it comin’ and they’ll be able to get out of the way. Sometimes you’ll get lucky enough that people’ll just walk into it.

Reticle- Reticle is honestly just a matter of preference; all of them are viable in my opinion. I currently made the switch back to Hanzo’s default after two years and I’ve found that the form it changes into for Storm Arrow helps me aim it better. But also! I’ve grown to like the triple line for a solid sight on where arrows are going if they aren’t fully nocked. - I’m still going to leave my old Crosshairs setting since it’s really paved the way for me. I liked having the additional top/bottom arms for aiming apart from just the left/right on his default. This might put you on the path for finding something you’re comfortable with. 

Practice- I personally like to do a custom match skirmish for practicing if I’m coming out of a long Overwatch break- You have just yourself and 6 other AI with every skill deactivated (I personally use 6 Anas) and it’s a great way to practice leading your shots. The AI will just unpredictably run around bc they have nothing else to do. - Once you feel more comfortable, take down the amount of AI, activate some skills, switch around the hero type of the bots, see if you feel any better against them. If not, go back.- I’m also all for practicing in vs AI. I play it all the time when I wanna chill; I used to play it exclusively. It’s just hard to sometimes practice correctly since the AI comes at you in a cluster and they go down pretty easily.

[mekapilot-princess-blog]

"I play to win."

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RULES BIO HEADCANONS

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