#i'm sorry i'm so introverted

[tofixtheshadows]

So I've been thinking lately about how Mithrun is Kabru's dark mirror (more on that another time- it needs its own post), and I thought it interesting that one of their parallels is that they were both cared for by Milsiril, but in opposite directions. She took Kabru in as her foster after he was orphaned and tried to convince him not to become an adventurer. On the flip side, she helped rehabilitate Mithrun specifically so that he could rejoin the Canaries.

And I kept wondering: why?

For Kabru, obviously she loves him a whole lot- despite any other shortcomings in their relationship, I do believe that.

So I get why she tries to convince him not to go dungeoning, and, failing that, at least prepares him as thoroughly as she can.

But why help Mithrun? She used to hate Mithrun, but after realizing what a secretly twisted person he was, she actually thought of him more positively (oh, Milsiril). So it wasn't as if she held the kind of grudge that might motivate her to make his already-depleted life even more miserable by sending him back to the dungeons. And it wasn't that she felt bad for him either, since she didn't visit Mithrun for the first ~20 years of his recovery.

The Adventurer's Bible says that Utaya was the impetus for Mithrun returning to the Canaries, but Milsiril is the one who made the trip to see him and tell him about it.

Why would Milsiril work so hard to get her old coworker back into fighting fit? Why encourage him to return to such a dangerous lifestyle, when she was the one who chose not to mercy-kill him?

That last panel is such a crazy thing to hint at and then never elaborate on. Without it we could have just thought that Milsiril wanted the Canaries' work to continue without her, even if it seemed out of character. I think some people even assume she's just a natural caretaker as a foster mom and handwave it to include nursing Mithrun too. What could Milsiril's suspicious motives be? What does she gain from Mithrun joining the Canaries that isn't an altruistic desire to see dungeons safely sealed? Feeling a sense of responsibility for the work she left behind isn't an ulterior motive.

My theory is: Milsiril, knowing that Mithrun was empty save for the burning desire to face the demon again, wound him up like a clockwork doll and pointed him back at the dungeons.

Hoping that he'd eliminate the biggest threat to Kabru's life, before it was too late for him.

Milsiril the puppetmaster.

[bookshelf-in-progress]

It's a good sign I'm recovering from my creative slump that I was able to brainstorm a story that makes me laugh.

[has-bad-ideas-constantly]

Summary:

Ibuki kidnaps a child then proceeds to threaten said child with adoption, Celestia hates that her sister is right.

Shuichi cannot catch a break, Rui Unogasai probably has ADHD or something the way she jumps from stuff to stuff

[agustdiv1ne]

hmm,,, thinking abt watching jujutsu kaisen w soobin...somehow when u first meet you both learn that it's each other's favorite anime...rewatching the 1st season together and discussing the manga in detail,, imagine him speaking passionately about his theories and his hands waving everywhere as he explains, stars in his eyes as you add on to them and he's like wow u are the One...one thing leads to another and you begin to date n he's all shy and blushy when you gift him a yuuta plushie for your 100 day anniversary,,,, watching the s2 trailer on his giant tv, hands intertwined as you swoon over gojo and getou and he begins to pout oh so adorably, whining that he's your boyfriend and you should be giggling and kicking your feet because of him...you sate him with a kiss and tell him that he's the only one you'd ever want!! and his plush lips curl into a shy, satisfied smile as he reciprocates the sentiment right back to you <3

[heartbeetz]

Thoughts.

I love my selfship bubble actually. One, I have low spoons 95% of the time, so I simply don't have it in me to be more active in reaching out. Two, I'm overall a very introverted person. Interacting (both doing and receiving) can be really draining and it's not something I care that much about. Even irl there's like one friend I keep up with, and we literally live together now and Still don't interact daily! Don't need much else to be content. I created this blog back in late 2019 as more of a journal than something meant for a community. And I'm fine leaving it that way. Yeah, sometimes I'd like to reach out more than I do (and of course it's nice when people reach out to me), but I don't think it's "selfish" of me to wanna do my own thing lol

[aromanticmina]

I hate amatonormativity all my homies hate amatonormativity.

[magratpudifoot]

I have fucked up and forgot to start the laundry until about 20 minutes ago, and I am D Y I N G of lack of sleep, but I have to stay awake until the clothes are in the dryer, and I hate E V E R Y T H I N G

[morphestic]

I wish to be part of something so badly but my boringness and fear of creating bonds stop me from joining anything

[haku23]

Heugh... Don't feel good today. Probably because I didn't do anything yesterday but 🥲

I am just so fucking tired of being in this place bro. I just want to be on my own 😭 but I feel bad for thinking that bc of Anxiety I'm literally like. Oh so u want your family DIED?! Like .. no I just want to be able to choose when I interact 🙃 and become my own person and be able to figure things out outside of my family not in a bad way!!! But heugh. I'm also like you're just romanticising the idea of living alone etc but idk!!!!!!!

[umilily]

i've been here for less than 2 days and i'm already exhausted by this household.

[exoexid]

jihyun when jaewon told him that they're sleeping out at the beach with a single blanket to cover them:

[cosmicstarlatte]

bleh, exhausted as hell but I had fun last night, went bowling with friends to celebrate a birthday.♡

anyway I hope to post my kinktober/flufftober plans this weekend. Probably tomorrow evening or sunday. 😵‍💫

I might've (did) strayed from the original plan but I hope my lil stuff is something to look forward to ^^'

[hammill-goes-fogwalking]

In retrospect: I should've opened up about my problems much earlier. What was the reason I kept it all inside me, as a secret? Yes I thought it would all go away over the time- but I noticed my lows & highs went more extreme and I was/ & am still seriously scared of depression itself

depression (also in combination with addiction) is the worst that can happen to you and it's not cool to use it as an empty or... funny (?) word. A depression goes so deep into you that its not the case that you simply close your eyes & forget. It's Not a personality disorder, it's a wound. So that was off topic :/

I wanted to say I recently got really scared to drift into a depression so I finally allowed myself to let out all my feelings/thoughts & cry in front of my family and friends and this seriously feels like a weight has fallen off my shoulders

[sunofmoon]

it is amazing that there were some mutual ones that really left their mark on me

every time i think of leo messi or argentina nt @/vayvaov comes to mind

every time i think of gabi martinelli (or gabi's in general) + arsenal @/starboygabi it comes to my mind

every time i think of marcus rashford or man united @/cryingforcrocodiles it comes to my mind

every time i think of kylian, barca ou the world's best gifs anyone can make @/doinggreat it comes to my mind

every time i think of kunessi, licha martinez, lichantony @/cherishlalune it comes to my mind

every time i think of neymessi or haalingham @/neyxmessi comes to mind

every time i think of neymessi, fanfics or sebchal @/lesbionel comes to mind

[cqcandchill]

unreasonably annoyed at the person who had to choose the stall right next to me in a completely empty bathroom with 10 other stalls... some of you bitches really can't handle being alone even on the shitter huh

[tweeterwilbury]

What are Bob's top ten gayest songs?