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#i've been drawing this for the past 9+ hours
account-name · 8 months
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quick no one's looking post springtrap x sun
@contentopossum
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seahdalune · 1 year
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thank you to divorced people for finally bringing back my motivation to draw again
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minhmynchi · 8 days
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(venting in the tags ignore this lol)
#minhmy.rambles#(i just need to shout this somewhere where my friends don't see so they don't worry too much about me)#but oh my god work just got worse for this week im already working every day but tomorrow (aka in six and a half hours)#i will start at 5am and end at 9pm aka a double shift bc my coworker tested positive and there's no one else that can work#just for tomorrow but the rest of the week ill be working 1-9#which i hate even though im used to it night shifts are just boringgggg and takes up a lot of my time#which i already have so little of#my mom said i should clean my closet and i was going to tomorrow bc i wanted to play grandfest today but now i cant do that#bc ill literally be at work all day lol#and god its just so hard its so so hard but it could be worse. it literally could be worse#i cant be here as much anymore bc im so busy and tired i just draw when i can and drop them all here and leave#and i miss writing a lot but i have even less time and even less motivation and the more i work the more awful i feel#and i don't want to worry anyone like . i just don't#but its so difficult for me it really is#theres so many things i want to do but i cant do any of it and im so tired im literally so tired#like im not gonna end my life kinda tired i have a lot to look forward to. but work just really sucks and i am Tired#and i Like my job its literally the easiest and ill never have something like this again#but urghghghh. urggfhhghgh. death pain and suffering#if i draw more sif and loop suffering lol. this is why. i need to get the emotions out somehow and i don't want to cry over it#i cant cry bc i need to work i just have to keep my head up i just have to keep at it i just have to be strong and not break#i can do it i can.. i know i can i've been through worse#its just. augh.#ok done. sorry i rly rly should sleep soon bc of my 16 hour shift tmrw lol its past 10:30pm already
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littlestpersimmon · 6 months
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Heya guys. Sorry for posting this for the billionth time. But maybe if you guys would like to give my posts about patreon a boost it would mean the world to me. I know I post this a lot and I don't take any help I receive for granted. I've only been able to make two new drawings since February. Bc every day I have been working almost 9 hours. I'm sick nearly every other week, my lymph nodes are swollen n I've been feeling incredibly depressed. I am from the global south, in the philippines, government help is near nonexistent. I am the sole caretaker of three disabled people. My mom can not do any housework, she is a full time wheelchair user, she needs care 24/7, insulin, adult diapers and kidneys that are under threat of failing if we don't watch her health, my dad has a chronic heart condition and my sister is autistic with a very low frustration threshold. Both my parents are diabetic, and I am the only person in my family who can work. I currently have three jobs, one in publishing, but I have a morality clause which means the publishing house can take back every single penny I make if I or the author fail to meet certain expectations. Anyway.. I have been working nonstop, my scoliosis is untreated and extremely painful, n for the past few four days I have been rationing a single can of spam and a few potatoes. Would mean the world to me if you guys could pick up a print, or subscribe to my patreon, or reblog any of my old art or send me a tip on ko-fi or anywhere else. Sorry and thank you again. I remake these a lot, but I sincerely don't take any of the help I receive for granted. Thank you again.
My inprnt
My patreon
https://www.patreon.com/littlestpersimmon
My tipping jars
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marleemutt · 10 months
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TLDR: im a black trans artist who can use some help right now following the sudden passing of my only sister - her doberman is now the responsibility of my parents and we can use help for his food, supplements, toys etc.
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Kofi (help me send Chewy orders to my parent's house)
Wishlist (literally send him things like toys, treats, etc.)
⬇️ more info ⬇️
hey guys
some of you might be aware of this already, but early October, my eldest sibling & only sister suddenly passed away due to a seizure, she had been dealing with epilepsy her whole life.
this has been incredibly difficult for me, and my family. her passing was incredibly sudden, she was only 30.
for the past month or so ive been struggling to find any motivation to draw, and barely able to work.
she was the incredibly devoted owner of a doberman named Remi(Ramsey). Me and my sister traveled 4 hours to pick him up three years ago. He's a goofball who tears up socks and needs constant supervision. My parents love him, but I can tell he is a lot of work for two people who have fulltime jobs and have lived long lives.
I'm going to try to help them take care of him as much as possible, I feel that it's the least we can do to honor my sister's memory, since she loved him so deeply.
My sister always wanted a doberman, for years she would watch videos about dobermans and talk about them to anyone who would listen.
Remi wasn't easy to raise - I shared a room with my sister when she got him in 2020, she still worked a 9-5, five days a week, so I was his nanny for most of his difficult childhood. I was his chew toy for the first year of his life about - but that only made him bond closer to me. If he wasn't following my sister, I was choice #2. Dobermans are "velcro dogs", they were bred to guard their owners, and because of this, they are fiercely loyal. I've been moved out of my parent's place for going on 3 years, and my sister had just moved with Remi out a few months prior to her passing.
A week before my sister's sudden passing, we had to board Remi at my dog daycare job while my family and I took a trip out of state. When dropping him off, although he was happy to see me again for the first time in months, the moment my sister turned her back to him he began to panic. He got through the boarding all right but my coworkers told me he would cry and wait by the door for me or her. When my sister picked him up, they said he jumped all 80+lbs into her arms.
Since my sister's passing, Remi has been directionless. He's with my family, people he trusts, but he's bored, confused, and heartbroken. My sister would often take him to the dog park, social events, on runs, etc. but my parent's can't do that in their age. If my apartment allowed large dogs, I would take him, but I can't, and I see him maybe twice a month if possible.
Ramsey's Christmas List
I made a christmas list for him of things that might help my parents better take care of him. We're trying different food brands out because he struggles with frequent stomach issues, and we can't seem to figure out what food my sister was feeding him. This list is by no means a necessity for him, but I tried to add things to help with his boredom and keep him stimulated when my parents can't give him all their attention.
i do want to state that my family is capable of providing him with the essentials to live, we arent irresponsible. i would just like to help my parents out since a 3 year old 80-90lb doberman is a lot of work to be suddenly placed on them soley. And I worry for his health and well-being sometimes - Remi has a tendency to eat/tear random objects when he's bored.
please consider donating whatever you can. Everything goes directly to him.
thank you for taking the time to read this, and possibly reblog if possible. ❤️
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bamsara · 6 months
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A03 Questions Tag Game
I got tagged by: @kagedbird I tag: @onethirdofimpossible, @coffincrows, (first two that come to mind) and anyone else who wants to do the game
1 – How many works do you have on AO3?
At the time of writing this post, currently 30 fics. (Not including any fics or written works that are not posted to AO3)
2 – What's your total AO3 word count?
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1,066,633
3 – What fandoms do you write for?
Formerly: Don't Starve, FNAF, Dragons Dogma, Invader Zim
Currently: Cult of the Lamb
4 – What are your top five fics by kudos?
Solar Lunacy, Celestial Omens, Bytes of Lunacy, The Rehabilitation of Death, Saturday Insomnia
5 – Do you respond to comments?
I try to but I also get very nervous responding because I often don't know what to say back and I feel like it's almost rude or disrespectful to respond to a comment, esp the very nice ones that are long and in-deph with just a keysmash or a bunch of emojis, but I do read every single one since I have email notifications on for them
I'd like to sit down and respond to many but I really don't want to make it awkward so pls dear god readers forgive me
6 – What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I don't like unhappy endings. I enjoy angsty stories but I like when it's at least ending happy to me
7 – What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Not posted? Solar Lunacy
Ongoing? TROD
8 – Do you get hate on fics?
Not really? Most adults (in my experience) know the 'don't like don't read' rule and know basic online etiquette. I've gotten some for discontinuing a fic or switching fandoms though
9 – Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
I don't write or draw NSFW! I like to make some suggestive themes sometimes, but I'm a very ace person, it's not something I do often. (I do have a current running goal that if my friend reaches their donation goal for their medical bills that I would give NSFW a shot, but again its not really my cup of tea)
10 – Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
Nah I haven't written any cross overs, but I do draw them sometimes. Recently I've been spinning a Alice in Wonderland x COTL crossover in my head.
11 – Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yep. I've had people copy and paste my work, go in with a thesaurus to change a few words (like changing 'angry' to mad, 'upset' to 'sad', and so forth) to try and avoid detection and re-posted my written work under a different title name. AO3 staff took them down for violating their policy against plagiarism though
12 – Have you ever had a fic translated?
No. I wouldn't mind it so as long as I'm asked before hand, though not on anon so I can actually work with the person to prevent any mistranslations or mishandling, and that I don't want my work posted to other websites
13 – Have you ever co-written a fic?
I think I did when I was a teen but I cannot remember now
14 – What's your all-time favorite ship?
Eh I don't have any favorites, just ones I really focus on for a long while
15 – What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
Pass.
16 – What are your writing strengths?
I can sit down for hours or several days and work on a writing wip completely in the zone. I cant do it on command but its at least something I can do
17 – What are your writing weaknesses?
Spelling and grammar, and sometimes long running sentences. I just kinda write, theres not really a goal for it to be perfect though so as long as the story gist and vibe is right, im fine with it
18 – Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I've done it before but only minor, had a friend help me with it (one or two lines of dialogue) Aside from that, I'm not comfortably fluent enough in anything to do it again without assistance
19 – First fandom you wrote for?
Soul Eater, when I was wayyy too young to be posting anything on the internet. My fanfics I wrote are still on fanfic.net to this day
20 – Favorite fic you've written?
It's inbetween TROD and EE&E right now
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June Creator of the Month: Thosehallowedhalls
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Please welcome this month’s Creator of the Month is @thosehallowedhalls.
Each month, CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers or artists. The writer or artist is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page. Past COTM's can be found here.
Quick Links:
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1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played?
I can't remember exactly. 2021, I think? Laws of Attraction was on its tenth chapter.
2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?
I joined in January of this year. I was upset with Crimes of Passion 2, so I wrote a couple of stories about it. I had deactivated my old Tumblr long ago, so I had to open a new one.
3- How did you pick your blog name?
I love old buildings - the history, the ambiance. I tried hallowedhalls, but it was taken, so I added the article.
4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!
I… have zero recollection of this post. But I'm big on nostalgia and mourning past times, so the fact that this was my first post tracks.
5- Do you write fanfiction, create fan art, or are you one of those really gifted people who do both?
I write fanfiction. I've been teaching myself to draw, but I'm not anywhere near close to sharing what I do.
6- How long have you been creating for Choices and for any other fandoms?
I started writing fanfiction way back in… 2010? For about four or five years. Then I stopped until December 2023.
7- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to create for?
Crimes of Passion on both counts.
8- Share your first Choices fanfic or fan art that you posted with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were creating it today?
That would be The 2 AM Christmas Tree Farm, inspired by The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. I do still like it, but I would tighten up the writing a bit. I had barely written any fiction for several years at that point, and the lack of practice shows.
9- What is your favorite piece of fiction or art that you created?
I keep going back and forth between The 2 AM Christmas Tree Farm and Home Without. Both are angsty short series.
10- Do you have a fic/art that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to do well but found it could use a little more love?
I was taken aback by the comments on The 2 AM Christmas Tree Farm. I'd posted it on AO3 a few weeks before, and had gotten a handful of kudos and one comment, but within 24 hours of posting it here, I had several lovely reblogs. It was a welcome surprise. Stories with fewer comments… I guess Home Without. The first chapter got quite a bit of love, but by the time the final chapter rolled around, fewer people were interacting.
11- If you could write only angst, fluff, or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?
I love a balance, but I'd say angst with a happy ending. I enjoy the breadth of emotions angst lets you explore.
12 - Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?
There are bits and pieces of me in all of them. Emma has my sarcasm, and Raine has my need to look for the best in people. There may be more, but if so, it wasn't done intentionally.
13 - What element of writing/art do you struggle with most?
Perfectionism. Like I said before, the lack of writing practice shows. I know that the only way to get better is to keep writing, but I hate seeing the gap between what I do and what I want to do. Catch-22.
14 - Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?
My Sebastyan x Emma fic, Of Cloudless Climes and Starry Skies. There are only a couple of chapters left, but I've been struggling with it for a couple of months now.
15 - If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to see your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you show them first?
Oh, hell no.
16 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing or art? Are there any artists that influence you?
So many writers have influenced my writing throughout the years, including authors I do not currently read. The Brontë sisters, Charles Dickens, Nora Roberts, Jane Austen, Courtney Milan, Alyssa Cole… I could go on and on. Fanfic writers… There are a lot, but off the top of my head, @inlocusmads, @coffeewithcutcaffeine, @gaiuskamilah, @aria-ashryver, @jerzwriter, @dutifullynuttywitch, @aces-and-angels, @petalouda85, and @storyofmychoices. I know there are more.
17- Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series?
Home Without. I'm a sucker for good pining, and I'd love to see all that mutual longing play out onscreen - not to mention that reunion.
18- Do you write original fiction or create non-fandom art?
I do. I'm currently working on a horror short story, a MG novel, and a dual timeline mystery that's still in the research stages.
19- What other hobbies do you have?
Reading, non-fandom writing, drawing, learning new things (especially languages!), going on walks, and drinking enough coffee to alarm medical professionals anywhere.
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tabl3 · 27 days
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when i tell you that i've been going through 11 hour shifts, 9-5 meetings outside of my job, moving myself and my cat, and the semester starting the past three-four weeks straight
and today was the first day i had time to actually indulge in my writing/drawing hobbies
and then i take a covid test
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memberment · 30 days
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GOOD MORNING EVERYONE
So the Trinitarians brain worm is back and Morning Glory is now longer and biting the dust as far as my focus goes.
But like, I genuinely want to talk to anyone who's invested in what's to come as far as part two goes. SO PLEASE. I IMPLORE THE FOUR OF YOU WHO PERPETUALLY TAKE NOTICE OF MY SCREAMS INTO THE VOID.
We're all aware that Trin is a time loop fic. That is confirmed.
BUT THE PROBLEM IS HOW I'M GOING ABOUT DOING THAT. AND I NEED INPUT FROM PEOPLE THAT ARE NOT ME AS FAR AS PLEASES AND SPARKLES GO, YES?
Because like sure I'm writing it and like fuck everything else, let me tell my story. But it's the how of it all like if I'm gonna throw another 200 give or take hours into this I would at least like one person to be having a wonderful time drinking and driving (I have since remembered this is not a common phrase, I do not mean this in a literal sense, it's an expression) with me right?
Part two is going to be 50 chapters, give or take. (Part one is about 37 for reference.)
So the plan for part 2 rn is (ROGUHLY):
(1-10) is the second timeline. There are a lot of importants and I cannot just glaze over it all more than that. But we're also working in a bit of a shorter time period than the original events of the story and introductions do not need to happen again, right?
(11-40)ish would be me running through the next timelines in a set up structure -> what changes -> the results of said changes and then inevitably what sends our looper backwards. It wouldn't be running through all the timelines but the more notable ones in kind of a four chapter structure, I am not fully sold on four, but rough estimate yk.
And then 41-50 would be the finale of part two. It's literally the last timeline in its glory and then the epilogue which kicks off part three.
COULD AT LEAST ONE OF Y'ALL SIT THROUGH THAT OR DO YOU GUYS HAVE ANY NOTES AT ALL BECAUSE LIKE
I personally kinda like it but if not a soul is reading this I am throwing myself on the curb with the rest of the garbage LMFAOOO.
I NEED THOUGHTS. OPINIONS. COMMENTS. CONCERNS. ANYTHING.
Anyways, I'm going to work. I have off tomorrow and I broke the ff investment seal for today so insanity and updates will be here tonight and homework will be tomorrow.
HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GOOD DAY <3
(9:30) I am literally falling asleep as I lazily write this angel based on Danse Macabre. Expect all of maybe one more update tonight if the tacos I am abt to receive don't wake me up LMFAO.
Also, I am almost saddened by not having something to post tm. Anyone want an early chapter of something that isn't Genesis/Desolation bc they're both on Monday?????? (I am feeling like a menace rn)
(10:19) tacos and the absolute yap session I just had did wake me up a bit. MAAAYBE might write some more. Idk I slept like three hours last night and went to work I'm kinda dead. But we're at 98.2k!!!!!!🥳
(11:06) okay we made it to 99.6k everything besides the flashback for 31 is done. I'm about to relax and watch something and figure out mechanics of some of this because god this series is A BEAST. Like, I still have six planned chapters left.
Pure insanity. I love it here. I hate it here.
Holy shit wait I just came to the realization that I started this fic exactly one month ago. I have belted out 99.6k for THIS FIC ALONE. (Moreso if we're including future shit that hasn't happened yet)
IN ONE MONTH.
THAT IS FUCKING CRAZY WHAT HTE FUCK LMFAOOOO
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I may or may not be cooking we’ll find out in 6-26 business hours
(5:28) So I just had a very interesting past few business hours. I read a fic I've been waiting ever so patiently to finish. That's cool, right. I go for a walk at 4 in the morning because I'm insane. Fantastic. I get home at five and I'm like ohhhh well what do I do now it's not sleep time yet. Oh write I'm supposed to be drawing.
Nope I reread the epilogue of morning glory and realized Tweek's first address is for my morning glory and Craig's last sign off is your morning glory and now I'm ready to throw myself on the curb with the garbage as I sob. Someone call a trusted adult for me thanks.
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squeaksinc · 9 months
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2023 creative year in review! 💦💦
The most stand-out thing to mention was this was arguably my most active and productive cosplay year...maybe ever? its incredibly uncommon that I can handmake 9 costumes in a year, but on top of that, 7 of the 9 were also custom designs, which is pretty wild.
costume-wise, i learned a stupid amount of skills and really pushed what i was comfortable with. IMO the best from the year are the collector, knives, pupet, and nekomancer at least just from a craftsmanship perspective. I try not to brag or be an ass, but I am genuinely very proud of those. they posed fun creative challenges that kept me engaged, and I'm happy with how they turned out!
the other side of the coin is although last year was my most dormant cosplay year, other crafts were super active....and the reverse happened this year _(:3」∠)_ i didnt really draw much at all other than making cosplay designs, and other physical media didnt get much time to shine either. I made some plushies, but they were lackluster, and I think I made maybe one unfinished figure lol. but I did try BJD making and loved it!! I made 4 this year and have plans to do more haha.
thats the upbeat overview, the readmore is going to be a more negative perspective so proceed with caution haha.
More than anything I wish i had more time to do art and build up Stitch in The Ditch/more OC work, but honestly this year was also objectively insane in the non-creative front. like i hit the worst patch of chronic pain i've ever had/found out my abdominals have been ripping themselves apart and bleeding for the past 10 years lol/had to go to the hospital like THREE!!!! goddamn times and now i'm dealing with the news i'm going to need abdominal surgery, got a teaching promotion/award, got my physics masters, utterly INSANE family happenings, had gastroparesis for 2 months and couldnt eat more than 200 cal a day in that time which caused all my blood levels to crash and i'm still reeling from it, and of course, have just been Cashually working goddamn 60-80 hours a week in an experimental physics lab in the background during all of this which is driving me to the point of madness- suffice to say i hit my limit like months ago lmao.
like looking back i know i should be happy and proud i did so much but i cant help but feel disappointed and wishing i had done better quality stuff. honestly, i know i goof about how hard work is, but its really really getting to me. i've always been happy with my ability to juggle so many things and preserve my ability to have a cool job, make cool things, and independently take care of myself, but work is month-by-month morphing into more of a monster thats just been suffocating everything else out. I really dont know what next year will look like, as i've been wearing thinner and thinner i'm noticing a trend where I just dont have the energy that I used to to do anything outside of my job.
I bring this up because on paper I should be happy with what I made, but I still feel like im in a stand-still. I made a lot of costumes, but tbh they were low quality/lackluster. like the number went up, but the quality didnt and I couldnt do much of any other art things. I couldve, and shoulve, been able to make much better work this year than I did, but it didnt happen as a combo of being snuffed out by my job physically and mentally.
in 2023 I got a head start/built up momentum from the beginning of the year that carried me through when things got insane in spring/summer/currently, but I'm already starting 2024 from a low point. yall. im so tired. im so goddamn tired. like its funny to goof about how much I do but its catching up fast and i think this is going to be the year when I just cant keep up anymore. Its hard to talk about since the "being crushed to death by your job" topic isnt one people want to engage with, and unless you're experiencing it first hand its hard to understand what living like that really means.
for 2024, i know theres no way I will be able to match this same number of costumes, but my goal is no matter what I want to start making things that are more solid on a construction level. fewer projects, more polish. also doing more non-cosplay stuff like world building and dolls would also be awesome. will that happen??? lord only knows. honestly usually these predictions/goals go haywire but this is also more of a response to external things outside of my control so ???? ??????? we'll see lads
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black-arcana · 22 hours
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Ex-BUTCHER BABIES Singer CARLA HARVEY Launches New Project THE VIOLENT HOUR
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Former BUTCHER BABIES singer Carla Harvey has launched a new project called THE VIOLENT HOUR. At least some of the early recording sessions for the project have been overseen by producer Jay Ruston, who has previously worked with ANTHRAX, STEEL PANTHER and URIAH HEEP, among many others.
Harvey shared the news of THE VIOLENT HOUR's launch in a social media post on Saturday (September 21). She wrote: "It's coming. I've put my heart and soul into my new project THE VIOLENT HOUR over the last 6 months. I can't wait for you to hear it. Keep your eyes peeled for updates. This is a slower process than I'd like...but...I'm pumped!"
BUTCHER BABIES announced their split with Harvey in July, saying in a statement that "Carla has been an integral part of our journey, bringing her unique talent, passion, and energy to the band," and wishing "her all the best in her future endeavors."
Carla, who co-founded BUTCHER BABIES in 2010 with fellow vocalist Heidi Shepherd, confirmed her exit from the band in a separate post, saying that she was "super proud" of her work with BUTCHER BABIES and adding that she was "not done making music and performing."
Last fall, BUTCHER BABIES completed a European tour without Carla, who sat out the trek in order to undergo emergency surgery on her left eye.
BUTCHER BABIES recently embarked on a three-week European tour, starting on July 27 at the Stonehenge festival in The Netherlands.
This past January, Harvey and ANTHRAX and PANTERA drummer Charlie Benante announced that they were officially engaged.
BUTCHER BABIES released a double album "Eye For An Eye..." and "…'Til The World's Blind", in July 2023. The double album celebrated the tenth anniversary of BUTCHER BABIES' critically acclaimed debut, "Goliath", released on July 9, 2013 via Century Media Records.
Smitten with tales of the Sunset Strip, Harvey made the pilgrimage to Los Angeles from her Native Detroit to play a little rock and roll…and instead found herself the entertainment report for a groundbreaking cable TV news program. After hosting two series and acting in a variety of television programs, movies and commercials, Harvey took a break from showbiz to earn her degree in mortuary science. She embarked on a successful career in embalming and funeral directing before going back to her first love: music.
In addition to writing and recording, Carla has a passion for drawing and penning comic books. Her love affair with the genre started when she discovered the Incredible Hulk at four years old. She spent the majority of her teenage years holed up in her room listening to PANTERA and developing an affinity for drawing her own scantily clad comic book characters. Dubbed a "comic book master-mind" by Hustler magazine, Harvey's first published comic book "Butcher Babies" (a fantasy, horror concept surrounding her now-former band),premiered and sold out at its Comic-Con San Diego debut, leaving fans chomping at the bit for her next comic, "Soul Sucka". Shortly after, she released her first full-length novel, "Death And Other Dances", to rave reviews. Carla's art has been featured in Famous Monsters magazine and has graced the cover of iconic Heavy Metal magazine.
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iraprince · 2 years
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hi idk if this is a weird question but like. how do u Make Art with adhd? you mentioned in your comic that you struggled w various other creative hobbies, but like drawing feels to me always like the Big Bad Thing I Cannot Ever do. even tho i want to make it my career LOL
how'd you get past that?
not a weird question at all! this is actually a question i ask myself pretty much every day, bc generally my answer to "how do i make art with adhd" has always been: With Great Difficulty, lmfao.
it's hard! i am not always good at it! i made art my job bc i realistically couldn't imagine being truly happy with anything else; if that wasn't the case, i'm not sure i would be doing this. like, that ends up being a big divide between the hobbies mentioned in that comic vs art, which is something that it seems (according to viewing my online activity) i do "Consistently;" it is my career, so there's a level of like, urgency and necessity there that my hobbies don't have. which, like, obviously my advice is not "make it your job so that you HAVE to OR ELSE :)" because it doesn't work like that. i am spending an amount of time OR-ELSE-ing that i think might surprise ppl, and i am frankly very lucky that my wife is the primary provider for our family, because it gives me a safety net for when my brain makes a loud grinding noise and then belches a big cloud of smoke and i have to spend a week hitting it with a wrench.
ANYWAY. this is going to get long bc i have a lot of thoughts abt it. there's really no one answer to getting past it, and i am not "past it," i don't know if i think anyone ever can be! we can just try really hard to keep going in ways that won't burn us out. if i had to pull out the absolute #1 most important thing i've learned over the past few years, it is -- and i know this sounds like dumb corny bullshit but you really have to stay with me here -- being kind and patient with yourself.
i'm being so dead serious. if beating yourself up and freaking out and constantly agonizing over how much more you Could be drawing worked, you would be drawing right now. if beating ourselves up over our output worked, EVERYONE would be drawing ALL the time. it doesn't fucking work! it does not! do literally anything other than yelling at yourself. it's bullshit. it's fuckery. it does not work.
on the other hand, cultivating as much kindness and patience and compassion as i can muster -- saying, "well, it looks like i just don't have it today. that's okay, let's try again tomorrow," even if i'm saying it through clenched teeth and i don't really believe it -- THAT works, because it chips away at the idea of drawing being life or death. it's probably a very similar feeling to you describing art as The Big Bad Thing. of course if you hang all your self worth on it and let it become immense and dominating, it's going to be hard to interact with it! it's scary! it becomes easier to avoid it than to try to tackle it and then feel disappointed in yourself in a more active way (vs. just disappointed in yet another day where u didn't try). but every time i sigh and say "okay" when my brain is screaming and crying bc art just is not working, and i decide to rest and try again tomorrow, 1. it is easier to do a little bit of work the next day when i'm rested than it is to do ANY work when i chain myself to my desk for 9 hours and demand results, and 2. i learn that it is not the end of the world. it just isn't. and so art gets smaller, and less frightening, and it can just be my job (something i have to wrangle my adhd around just like anything else, like grocery shopping and keeping the house clean and keeping up with my friends) instead of some huge destructive boss battle with my identity hanging in the balance.
sometimes you have to talk to yourself like a little kid. if a little kid came to you upset and was like "i wanna draw but i just can't. i don't know why." you would (hopefully) not be like, "whatever, i guess you're just not cut out for it then!" or whatever other mean shit we say to ourselves when we can't draw. you would be like, "well, okay. do you want me to sit with you? how do we start? where's some stuff we can draw with? hm, i can't really think of what to draw either. did you see anything pretty or cool today? let's just draw some shapes." etc etc. and if the kid got frustrated and it still wasn't working you'd be like, you know what, that was a good try. let's have some lunch and try again later. and you deserve that same level of patience, and that level of CURIOUS problem-solving ("what can we try? what might be easier?") instead of, like, adversarial/blame-assigning problem solving ("what the fuck is the matter with you? why can't you just do it?")
also, shaking things up!! one of the most frustrating things abt adhd for me is i'll find a new strategy that Works, but it only works for like, two weeks or whatever, and then it stops working and i have to do something else. i have had a way better time just accepting that that's how things work vs thinking of these cycles as "failures."
if i start dreading working at my desk, i throw a block of printer paper onto a clip board and work on the couch for a few weeks. when that stops working, i get back on drawpile and do all my warmup sketches on an interactive canvas, with strangers around me (virtual coffeeshop lol?). when i get tired of that, then maybe i'm ready to be alone with clip studio again. nope, still not working? okay, let's stream while i'm working for a while then. let's start drawing differently. let's change the background color i draw on. just, like, i keep shaking things up to see if maybe i can trick my brain into feeling like we're doing something totally new for a while, and a lot of the times it works, and when it does not work i am not an asshole to myself, which is, as i keep reiterating, super vital.
when i make the most art is when i get super excited about something and i let myself go apeshit. (there's a reason my guild wars 2 stuff is corralled on a sideblog lmao.) when commissions start grinding to a halt for me, a lot of times it's bc i've let them become Tasks on a to-do list instead of remembering that each piece is a DRAWING; it can help for me to sit down and go through each piece in my queue and really look at it, and remind myself that these are DRAWINGS and i LOVE drawing, and to point out to myself stuff in the wip that i like, and stuff i'm excited to draw the next time i work on it. it's very easy to flatten stuff into just An Obligation if you stress too much about it, but it's very helpful to slow down and step back and remind yourself WHY you care that much. it's not just bc you have to.
i don't really want this to get much longer than it already is, especially when i don't really have concrete tips so much as rambling opinions and examples of stuff that Kind Of works for me Sometimes. i think the tldr is: relax, be nice, keep it fresh. i hope at least some of this is helpful!
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thatonebirdwrites · 5 months
Text
Fandom creators tag game
1. What sort of content do you create, and what is the thing you’ve made that you’re most proud of?
I write stories. Usually original science fiction, but in the past two years, I've branched into fanfiction. I also create art and music.
I'm damn proud of my rewrite of Book 2 of Legend of Korra in my Shared Moments series.
I wish I could find a publisher for my original fiction; then I could share what I'm most proud of but alas. The publishing market is incredibly hard to get into and I don't have the health to self-publish, so we'll go with the Korrasami tales for now. For art, I'm damn proud of this piece I did of Lena.
2. What fandom(s) do you create for?
Korrasami from Legend of Korra.
Supercorp from CW's Supergirl
Rojarias from CW's Supergirl.
3. What is your current favourite ship (or brotp if you prefer), and how controversial is it?
Korrasami. Not controversial much at all. (As a side note, Supercorp feels like an angstier Korrasami. Might be why I like that ship equally well. Supercorp doesn't seem controversial?)
4. For your answer to question 3, are they canon?
Yes, Korrasami is canon. (Supercorp isn't necessarily canon, but there's so much evidence of it in the show that it might as well be.)
5. What was your first fandom, and how old were you?
First fandom I created something for? Or first fandom where I dived into and read everything I could? Because if it's read everything I could, then it's Star Wars before Disney threw out the old Canon (still salty about that). I'd have been pretty young -- still a kid when I was devouring all the Star Wars books. I didn't have any favorite ship though while I did this.
For something I created, Korrasami was the first one I wanted to create art and writing for to be honest. That was three years ago when I started writing Korrasami.
6. What is your most unhinged fandom creation to date?
Oh, that's a Supercorp one. I was inspired by a weird camera glitch, and wrote an unhinged horror set after season 6. The first part of it is in tumblr. I have yet to publish to AO3 mostly because I want to finish more of it before I do. Sort of loosely based on Lovecraft's Color out of Space.
7. Do you remember what started you off creating fandom content, and if so, what was it?
Three years ago I first started drawing and writing Korrasami. Then I branched out into Supercorp.
8. Do you let people you know in real life see your fandom creations?
Only my trusted friends and siblings.
9. How do you feel about fanworks of fanworks? Has anyone ever made something based on a thing you made?
If anyone did, they have never shared it with me. I would love to see it, and I'd treasure it always!
Though if I'm being honest. I doubt I'll ever get fanworks. Why would anyone go to that much trouble for something I wrote? I doubt anything I write is worth that much.
10. What feeling do you most often try to evoke with your creations?
I want to show possible healing journeys that aren't the most painful angstfest known to humanity. I want people to feel the journey too, to capture the world within the character's senses so that their tale feels real.
Whether I achieve this, I have no idea. Some people have written very kind comments stating that I have, and I am delighted by those comments.
11. Has someone ever paid your work a compliment (in any form) that has stuck with you, and what was it?
Two people have said I made a place feel alive through the storytelling and worldbuilding I did. That compliment haunts me in all the best ways, and I have done my best to try to keep that tradition going.
12. What’s your favourite thing someone else has made that you’ve seen in the last 24 hours (and link it if you can find it again!)
It was a Supercorp art piece, but after searching, I can't seem to find it again. It was Lena leaning backwards into Kara's arms, while Kara gently holds her. Colored piece, digitally drawn I think. They look almost like they were swaying back and forth.
13. Give a small sneak preview of something you’re working on right now (eg a couple of sentences of fic from a WIP, a gif set theme, a small piece of a larger picture, whatever you feel happy to share)
Korrasami:
Korra looked at their entangled hands. “Yeah, yeah, it’s just some stitching.”
“And yet, that ‘some stitching’ made something wonderful.” Asami was determined to remind Korra of what she could do. It’d been her mantra for the past six months. She wanted Korra to regain her confidence, but it'd been difficult. Thanks to Asami's foolishness they'd both backslid.
Korra had called it Asami’s paranoia.
Maybe they were both right.
Supercorp:
Lena rises before dawn, prepares her corporate armor, and heads to her full-time job as CEO of L-Corp. Today’s agenda includes four meetings, one of them with the board, an hour of lab time, a brief lunch, and a visit to Florence in late afternoon.
It’s the visit with Florence that troubles her the most. The exposure to the strange artifact gave her unsettling dreams, and she woke in a cold sweat after a particularly gruesome one. In that one, she’d had no control over her body, only watched in horror as another person used her abilities to harm all she loved.
Kara had woken too, and her gentle reassurances had helped Lena fall back asleep, this time with no dreams.
Diving into work to escape the nightmares is how she copes. Perhaps not the healthiest, but undoing all her bad coping mechanisms will take far longer than just admitting they exist.
Rojarias:
Tomorrow morning? Sam reeled from the news. That gave her very little time to pack and prepare Ruby for Sam being gone a week or two.
Yet here she was again, unable to say no. Especially not when two beautiful women were looking at her expectantly.
Damn, Sam was too gay for this. “All right. Tomorrow it is.”
14. Have you ever seen/read anything made by the person who tagged you? If so, what was it and what was your favourite thing about it? (pick a favourite if there are several)
Yes, I have. I'm not entirely sure what exactly they published on AO3 however. I found the tiny Kara piece absolutely hilarious.
15. Do you leave comments on fandom works, and if so how would you describe your comment style?
I do leave comments, yes. I share my enjoyment of the piece, sections that really stood out to me, and/or an overall feeling I got from the piece. I'm trying to be more consistent about it since I know how much comments mean to me as a writer, and I know other writers enjoy them too!
16. How many works in progress do you currently have? Will you finish them all?
Original fiction: (on hiatus but I do plan on finishing) 3
Korrasami: 2 (plan on finishing them, yes).
Supercorp: 3 (yes, plan on finishing them.)
Rojarias: 1 (yes, I need to get on this as it's due next month actually).
Art for Supercorp: 1 (I also need to work on finishing this before the due date next month. I got the rough sketch and need to run it by the author to make sure it's what they want, before I go to town inking it).
17. what’s the longest it’s ever taken you to finish a fandom project?
Shared Moments: Books 1 through 3 (the finished ones) took me a year. A million words no less. Whew. I'm working on Book 3.5 now. I tend toward longer works, which takes a few months to complete.
My shorter fiction (the ficlets) take less than an hour usually.
For art, it takes me one to three weeks.
18. Describe the thing you made most recently in a way that is technically true, but also completely misleading. Link the thing if it’s published!
These paralleled kisses shake their world. (A chapter for Unraveling Realities)
19. Do you ever engage with fanworks for a fandom you’re not in? Which one(s) and how did you get into it?
I'm not really sure what counts as being "in" a fandom or not. If I enjoy something, I'll engage with it, but does the engagement mean I'm "in" the fandom now? Or do I have to create something and talk with others in the fandom to be considered "in?" How does this work?
20. Recommend a fan work from your fandom to your followers
I absolutely adore Make this your home by pcrtifacts so much I even made fanart for it. It's not finished, but it's regularly updated and so, so good.
Suggested tag list, but there are no rules here, follow your heart.
A mutual you have never actually spoken to but think seems cool -- All my mutuals are really cool! And I'd love to read more of their stuff. Thanks all of you for sharing your stuff!!
The most recent person whose content you engaged with (eg read a fic, reblogged art, whatever form you feel best fits) -- I'm not sure? Maybe the person I reblogged this from?
Someone whose content you saw via tags/reblogs and you followed them because of it @luthordamnvers (I honestly love the indepth knowledge of the show nic has, how willing to share that knowledge, nic's kindness, the fics they write. Honestly, all around wonderful person.)
Someone in your fandom that you think makes cool things @ekingston (Shape of Soup being my favorite plus the art is amazing.)
Someone in a different fandom that you think makes cool things (this is hard. I really only seem to follow or find Korrasami, Supercorp, and on rarer occasions Rojarias or Dansen. There's some Star Wars folks that do fun things, but I can't remember their usernames tho.)
Someone you always tag on things like this @nottawriter
Someone you have never tagged before (I can't remember who I tagged before, so I guess whoever wants to play this game?)
Someone you would like to get to know better @pcrtifacts (love, love their make this place your home fic. And chatting in comments with pcrtifacts has been lovely.)
Someone who makes art you like -- @snazzy-korra (honestly, she's an all around amazing person, and Iove all her art and chatting with her. So grateful for our chats too.)
Someone who writes fics you like: @fazedlight (I seriously love everything mel writes. It's all so damn good. I even wrote a fanfic continuation of a piece I really liked of mel's ficlets. First and only time I've ever done that.)
I suspect some of these people have been tagged multiple times. My apologies if so. But I did want y'all to know how you're appreciated and how much I enjoy your content too. :)
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enha-hype · 11 months
Text
maeumi & me - ch 26 : misunderstood
a/n : written part comes first. ignore timestamps in pictures as usual but not for the written part!
w.c. : around 2k oops
9:30 am.
You're in the midst of stealing another sneaky glance at Jungwon as he works when Heeseung arrives. He walks over to your table and flops down opposite to you, his annoyance evident in his sarcastic smile. You roll your eyes.
“Okay fineee, I lied about where I was. But I am doing my homework here as you can see!” You wave your worksheets at him. “It's just that Won has been bugging me to try the café's new Dalgona coffee and I was like, what’s so great about Dalgona right, I mean I can make it myself at home and he was like, no we add this special ingredient that makes it absolutely delightful and I was like.…” you trail off, realising you’re rambling and not really helping your case, judging by the look on your friend's face. You clear your throat. “Anyway, I had some time left since my first hour today was cancelled and I thought I might as well come here and get some coffee and finish my homework and I didn't tell you because I mean, you've already been bugging me non-stop since last night,”
“Well of course I have!You two almost kissed!!” he shrieks, drawing the attention of a table of friends nearby.
“Shhh, quiet down he's literally a few feet away! Also wait, you saw that?”
“Yuh huh! Why else do you think I've been losing my–”
“So you interrupted us on purpose?” Shit. Did you actually ask that out loud? You hadn’t meant to. “Actually no forget I said that–”
Heeseung’s eyebrows shoot up, an amused smile replacing his scowl. “Well, I–”
“Nuh uh I don't wanna hear it la la la la la la,” you plug your ears with your hands.
He shakes his head. “Y/n, come on. What are you doing? It's so obvious that you like Jungwon–”
“I don't like him! It's just that he's so nice to Maeumi and so sweet to me and– Ugh, hold on I'm getting a call. Hello?”
It's your classmate calling you up to remind you about the meeting for a group assignment. You promise her you’ll be there on time and hang up. You turn your focus back to Heeseung, who is leaning forward with his hands crossed on the table, looking at you with patient scepticism. You sigh - he’s right. What are you doing? Why are you trying to dismiss these feelings that are as clear as day? “I know that look.”
“What look?”
“The look that says you don't believe my bullshit.”
“Well you got something right at least.”
You put your head into your hands. “Fine. I like him, okay? Maybe a little too much. And yes I came here so I could see him again even though it’s barely been two hours since I saw him back at Jake’s place. And it's just. Ahhhh. I don't know, I've never liked anyone this way before and it feels so nice but also weird because it’s new and a little overwhelming sometimes and I just maybe need some time to come to terms with it before you guys all start freaking out,”
He nods and leans back in his seat, satisfied. “Okay.”
You look up at him in disbelief. “‘Okay’?? That's it???”
He laughs. “What, did you expect me to demand to know everything right now? Come on Y/n, give me some credit. I’m not that bad of a friend.”
“Debatable,” you tease, ducking as he reaches to hit you playfully. “Well no it’s not that. I just, I don’t know, expected a bigger reaction I guess?”
“You know you guys have not really been discreet or anything right? It’s kind of been a little too obvious the past few days. But I will say that I wasn’t expecting you guys to go in for a kiss last night right when I happened to walk in. Which is why I may have, uh, panicked a little and ended up switching on the light,” he flashes you a sheepish smile.
You shake your head, feeling your cheeks get hot as you think back to the moment. God, so close. If only you hadn't been interrupted... “You lil shit,”
“Wha– you just said it yourself, it’s weird! I’ve never seen you do ‘romancey’ stuff and you've always been so blehh about dating and relationships and now suddenly you can’t stop gushing about this guy and I don't know, it's like seeing your sibling kiss. Gross,” he cringes and you slap his hand.
“Ow! Also, where is Jungwon?”
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9:06 am.
Jungwon has practically been vibrating all morning from the excitement of what happened last night. Well, of course nothing really happened, strictly speaking. Still, he was happy at the prospect of it. At the idea that he maybe has a chance with you after all. Like, he’s had a crush on you for so long, it seems unreal. He had almost fully accepted the fact that that was all it was ever going to be – a crush. And then things happened, and here he was. He bites the inside of his cheek, trying to keep himself from smiling. From the corner of his eye, he catches the weird looks his older co-barista, Taehyun, has been giving him.
The front door opens with a ding of the bell, indicating the arrival of another customer. Jungwon finishes serving the caffè mocha he was making just in time to greet the new one.
“Good morning, what–” he stops short when he looks up and sees that it’s you. He stutters and completely forgets what he meant to say and gives up halfway. From the way he’s grinning, even a passerby who chances to see him from the sidewalk outside could guess he’s head over heels. Taehyun recognises you immediately – he's only seen Jungwon behave like an idiot one other time, which was the first time you had come here a couple of weeks ago. Jungwon had immediately dropped everything he was doing and had all but run to you despite how busy the cafe had been that day, leaving the poor guy to deal with the growing line of customers all by himself. Although it had been a bit of an inconvenience, Taehyun didn't give him too much of a hard time about it because for one thing, it had been kind of cute to see him all flustered, and for another, Jungwon was someone who was usually pretty diligent with his work.
But here you are again. Cue Jungwon forgetting how to function like a normal human being.
“Hi,” Jungwon finally says, barely able to restrain the grin that he knows is a little too wide to be casual. “What are you doing here?”
You can't help but laugh. “You have got to stop greeting me like that every time I come here! Do you not like me visiting you at work?” You turn as if to leave, mostly to see how he'd react.
“No no wait sorry!” He reaches over and grabs your arm, planting it on the counter. “I just meant that if you were planning on coming here then we could've left together,” he drawls.
“Well, it was more of a last minute decision. Class got cancelled and I thought I'd just drop by and check out the new drink you were raving about. See what all the fuss is about,” you shrug nonchalantly, though the twinkle in your eyes betrays you. You're hyper-aware of the fact that his hand is ever-so-lightly brushing your forearm.
“Oh you’ll see alright,” he assures you, and with just a hint of nervousness seeping into the confidence, he enquires, “so, is that the only reason you're here?” He steals a quick glance at your lips, the pretty curve of them, before meeting your eyes again.
“Why else?” you ask, as though you have no idea what he could possibly be alluding to, although your hammering heart and the cheeky grin spreading across your face tell otherwise. Jungwon’s own giddy smile says he isn’t slow to catch on, either.
“I see. Strictly beverage purposes then.”
“Strictly,” you nod solemnly, suppressing your smile.
Taehyun clears his throat. “So, your order?”
You blink, suddenly remembering that you have an audience, and also that you're not just here to see Jungwon (well that's the story anyway). “Oh right, yes! Sorry. One Dalgona coffee, please.”
Jungwon flashes you an apologetic smile as he gets to work. “Sit wherever you'd like, your order will be ready in 10!”
Jungwon is so nervous about getting your order absolutely perfect that he messes up twice. Taehyun shakes his head, both amused and exasperated. When Jungwon starts to try for the third time, he stops him. “Gimme, I'll do it.” Jungwon mumbles a relieved thank you before internally chiding himself to get a grip. He can't continue to be such a mess every time you're around.
When he's done, Taehyun places the drink on the counter, ready to be served. He can see Jungwon open his mouth to say something and then change his mind and turn away. This happens again when he sees the waiter approaching and Taehyun rolls his eyes. “Oh my God, Jungwon, just go. I know you're itching to give it to them yourself,” he says, smiling despite himself.
Jungwon rubs the back of his neck, embarassed. “You sure?”
“Yeah yeah. We're not that busy yet it's fine. But just don't stay too long – you never know when our manager might drop by to check.”
He places the tray on the table in front of you, making sure to keep it as far away as possible from your books and worksheets so as to not ruin them.
“Ooo, what's this?” you ask, pointing to the ice cream sandwiches.
“Just little complementary treats.”
He watches you take the first sip and sees your eyes widen. “Oh, my God. This is a-mazing! What do you put in it?!”
“Well, it’s called a secret ingredient for a reason,” he beams. If he keeps being this cute you feel like one of these days you might just let your intrusive thoughts win and reach out to poke a finger into his adorable dimples. “Alright well enjoy the rest of it. I'm afraid I gotta get back,”
As he walks back, Jungwon finds that he's kind of glad the kiss didn't happen last night – he would like to properly ask you out first. How should he do it? Maybe he should keep it sweet and simple, make you a latte heart or something. Yeah, maybe you’d like that. And what should your first date be? Something cliché like a movie or dinner date? Or something unique? Ahh, he doesn’t know. If it were up to him, he’d just be content to have you over and do what you used to do before he started the internship. He doesn't care what you do as long as you are together.
9:32 am.
Jungwon steals a glance at your table and is surprised to find Heeseung with you. Huh. Guess you two had plans to meet up here. He waits as he serves two other customers to see if Heeseung would come to order anything for himself. When he doesn’t, Jungwon decides to go over himself and say hi.
As he approaches, he notices that you two seem to be deep in conversation, talking animatedly, and he slows, wondering if he should maybe come back after a while. Bits of the conversation float up to him right then and he freezes :
“It's so obvious that you like Jungwon–”
“I don't like him! It's just that he's so nice to Maeumi and so sweet to me and– Ugh, hold on I'm getting a call. Hello?”
Oh.
Right.
Of course.
It suddenly feels like someone just sucked all the sunlight out of the room. Jungwon turns right around, relieved that neither of you noticed him. Taehyun looks up from scrolling through his phone when he rushes back to the counter. He yanks his apron off, hangs it up hastily and grabs his things to leave.
“Wha–” he starts to ask but Jungwon cuts him off.
“Something came up. I have to go,” he apologises for the short notice and is out the door before the latter even has a chance to reply.
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a/n : please tell me at least one of y'all noticed the foreshadowing from profiles 2 🙏🏽
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altraviolet · 10 months
Note
Oh man now that I've seen TWO asks this day about Soundwave dying, is that the inevitable conclusion to this fic? Did I miss this big spoiler somewhere or all the clues to it? I don't remember seeing a "Major character death" tag, either.
Or is this people speculating and doing "what if"? ...not that I'd be adverse to it, especially if it made sense to do so!
Also I completely understand about work sapping all creative juices. While I don't write (I've dabbled in the past, but little 3k words or less things for OC's way back in the LJ days), I used to sketch, draw, paint nearly every day for hours before I ended up in a corporate 9-5, full time job. Even doing customer service jobs, I was able to sketch on napkins and scrap receipt paper and sticky notes.. and now I just.. can't. Its unbelievable how mentally draining full time jobs can be. Every now and then I'll get the sketch pad or watercolors out,but it's maybe once or twice a year now.
I've seen writers who do ko-fi for tips or writing commissions for certain stories (I remember a tf author I used to follow did this - where a story was only continued if the chapters were commissioned) - or even patreons, where they set up an early access to the newer chapters, and the cut scenes, additional content - have you thought about those? I think you've got a big enough following where it could be feasible to go part time! And maybe fund a self publishing of an original work sometime down the road!
>is that the inevitable conclusion to this fic? Did I miss this big spoiler somewhere or all the clues to it? I don't remember seeing a "Major character death" tag, either.
The major tag on the fic is "Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings." You haven't missed a big spoiler or clues. The influx of "WHAT IF HE DIES" was puzzling to me, too, but I rolled with it.
I'm curious why people think Soundwave is going to die, when one of the major themes of the fic (at least to me, inside my head) is bringing people back from the dead. Not literally, of course. But... but did they see the whole point of what Rodimus is doing? Trailbreaker, Ambulon, and Mirage? Skywarp? Literally pulling Soundwave from the shadow zone, where life is not worth living?
There's actually a lot more I want to say on this, but I don't want to spoil the story. I have a FAQ planned for when the fic is done and I address death in it, and my approach to writing it vs JRO, and the aforementioned major theme.
I'm guessssssssinnnnnnng people are going the doom route because of the Scavengers, and because Soundwave keeps getting injured and can't be healed, and because... ? I feel like stakes have been high in the past, so maybe that's part of it, too. I won't say anything else for now, though.
This post got long so I'll put the rest under a cut.
>Its unbelievable how mentally draining full time jobs can be.
good god, yeah. low key, I used to be an artist (mostly hobbyist, a few pro jobs). I gave up and went back to writing because it's much easier/comes more naturally to me, and that's all I have energy for. I fuckin' mourned stopping art, to be honest. but you know what, I'd rather have Echo Garden than slog through commissions. I learned I'd rather create my own things than do things other people want me to do. so I guess learning that about myself was ... good. it's absolutely unbelievable how draining a 9-5 job is. I will admit I am jealous of people who have spouses or understanding parents that allow them to do art full time by providing a safety net in the form of housing and health insurance. jealousy is very human, you know :D surely there is a better balance out there for us ;A;
>I remember a tf author I used to follow did this - where a story was only continued if the chapters were commissioned
oooohhhhhhhh you know... I get it. I get people need money. but that doesn't sit right with me. I would not withhold fic like that.
>patreons, where they set up an early access to the newer chapters, and the cut scenes, additional content - have you thought about those?
I've thought about it only in the fanciful sense. To be honest, unless I was getting enough support to quit my job, it's not really going to change my life. Like, how do I say this. I won't have any more additional time in the week to write if I make $50 extra/month through patreon. I'll still be doing my full time job AND I'll have an obligation to write for people. Does that make sense? Unless a patreon offsets the actually draining thing in my life, it's just another thing I have to do.
Although 'early access to chapters' sits way better with me than denying future chapters UNLESS funded. Though paying for fic is a huge gray area and I don't think it's wise to poke that beast...
>I think you've got a big enough following where it could be feasible to go part time!
thank you, I appreciate your kindness here :D I don't think my following is big enough, though. I think the readership is maybe 1400 people? and a bunch of those are minors and most of the adult fandom is fucking broke, lol. (the tf fans with the money tend to be the major toy buying ones, not the fanfic reading ones. Stereotype, but that's my observation)
and part of the problem is my place of employment. I asked, years ago, if I could go part time (so I could practice art) and my boss said no. it's a full time only position ;A; which is why I say, unless patreon can fully support me, it's not really feasible. freelancing incurs a higher tax rate and you don't have any health insurance, so I'd actually have to make more than I am now... and given the number of absolutely fantastic fan artists I see struggling to make it with patreon, I know I can't (since fan artists make more than fan writers)
I hope that my answers don't sound dismissive. Thank you very much for your empathy and kind ideas. I don't think the fandom can support me monetarily in the way I would need, and I think their interest in me will drop as soon as Echo Garden is finished. I base this statement on the fact that TEG has exponentially higher stats than any of my other fics.
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The people clearly want only one thing, and it will eventually end xD
If you or anyone else thinks I'm looking at this wrong and there may actually be a way I can write without dying, please let me know. I've thought about this for years and the above is what I've concluded.
Thank you again for the kind ask! <3
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chacusha · 10 months
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Quodo comic update
I HAVE DONE IT. 8D I HAVE FINISHED MY GODDAMN QUODO COMIC. It is 21 pages, plus a cover, plus an omake drawing.
I have been working on this project since 3 May (i.e. for over 28 weeks = 200 days = 6.5 months).
On average, each page took me 9 days (1.3 weeks) from start to completion.
Since around mid-May, I have been dedicating 20 minutes of each day to working on this comic.
I've put in an estimated 90 hours of solid drawing time (about 135 hours of work including breaks) into this beast. That's 90 hours of podcasts consumed while working on this comic.
For the past six months I have been working on this comic for 20 minutes as the first thing I do each morning. Now that I no longer have to do this, I am feeling a bit like Chun Li from Street Fighter II after defeating M. Bison:
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(This has been my reaction image to any situation where I finally feel free to live my life after a long period of sacrifice. I adopted it when I was a teen and it keeps on getting hilariously less and less appropriate over time.)
Anyway, I'll probably post one page of this comic a day, starting tomorrow with the cover page! ^o^
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