#idk if hes a bad guy or just a scamp and if he has anything to do with the main cast

[hightro]

just spitballing some ideas for my db oc lol

[ablogcalledrevenge]

I’m so intrigued as to why you hated Peter Rabbit so much omg. Please tell!!

I’m putting this under a read more because it got really long and complicated. Sorry, but I have a lot of feelings and thoughts about this and Peter Rabbit is the vessel.

That being said, if you like the movie, that’s okay! You’re allowed to like it and you shouldn’t let me make you feel bad. I love tons of bad movies! Spice World always makes me smile!

Also I want to say that I am not blaming or mad at the actors, crew, the CGI people. Like they did the best with what they had and I don’t fault them. I mostly blame the writers, director, and producers. Especially the producers.

BUT we can’t forget that, at the end of the day, this movie was a cashgrab, merchandise factory of a movie. This is, as my old roommate coined, a parking ticket movie. Basically the only reason half of the people worked on this movie was because they got a bad parking ticket and needed some quick cash. I do not believe for a second that Margot Robbie or Domhnall Gleeson looked at this script and went “yes, this seems like exactly the kind of children’s movie I’ve always dreamed of doing.” Everyone involved with this film did it for the money or because they were contractually obligated. And honestly, that’s okay. I could live with that. These are their jobs and they’re allowed to make money. But when you do a project because you’re forced to, or for the payout, it shows in the work. We can tell when your heart’s not in it. But the movie had bigger issues than the motivations behind it.

1. The movie didn’t have a good villain. Perhaps this is because I’m older and have more sympathy but Thomas McGregor is a very ineffectual villain. We start the movie, meeting him, as if he were the main character! We see that he’s a bit of a control freak and that he can be a little rude to people and then we see him lose his job and have a mental breakdown. He gets this house in the country and all he wants to do is sell it and move on. The rabbits are actively (and against their own desires, but we’ll get into that later) working against him to make selling the house harder. This guy’s supposed to be the villain? This guy who basically lost everything in his life and just wants to go home and spends half the movie getting electrocuted because he doesn’t want animals in the house when he’s trying to sell it? Maybe it’s because Domhnall can make anyone charming, or maybe it’s poor writing, but I watched the movie asking why I was supposed to hate McGregor. He hadn’t done anything wrong! To be honest, as you go through the movie it seems like the rabbits are the antagonists! If the movie was hoping to make him a Cruella DeVil figure, they failed. Thomas is a sad, broken man and I just felt bad for him. Also I don’t enjoy seeing my husband getting beat up by CGI rabbits, it’s embarrassing, but that’s beside the point.

2. The romance between Bea and Thomas is forced, unnecessary, and unlikely to last. Considering they’re supposed to get married and have a baby in the sequel, I think it’s even more ridiculous. The third movie will have them getting a much needed divorce. Like this is a kid’s movie, I don’t know why it needed a romance?? But basically Bea and Thomas have absolutely nothing in common. This isn’t a cute ‘opposites attract’ thing, this is that their values and morals and desires don’t match up at all. They’re completely different people! The fact that Thomas spends the whole movie basically lying to get Bea to like him should be proof enough that whoever wrote the characters never intended them to be a legitimate couple. They’re pushed together because, idk it’s a movie and we have to have a happy ending which means a wedding because apparently we’re in Shakespeare’s time?? People are allowed to be friends and they work better as friends! Also do you think Bea knows anything about shibari? That’s what Thomas needs and you expect this little granola painter to be able to tie him up and rough him around? Oh please.

3. The movie is just bad. The humor and plot are very weak and the characters are mostly one dimensional. I think I laughed once during the entire time I watched it. I must admit, in an effort for transparency, that I didn’t finish the movie. I had to stop watching after 45 minutes because I couldn’t take anymore. What does it say about your movie that 45 minutes in and the plot hadn’t really even started yet? It was ALL exposition and that’s bad! This is a kid’s movie, the action needs to start sooner! The humor was oddly topical and unoriginal; the whole movie was. It was clear this was a rip off of Home Alone, Alvin and the Chipmunks, 101 Dalmatians, The Minions. If not through plot than through style. Playing a Top 40 song during an opening scene doesn’t make your movie better, it just makes it lazy. It’s clear you didn’t pick “Feel it Still” by Portugal the Man because it added something to Peter’s character. You added it because people know the song and it will make them sing along and smile. The plot is weak too, it doesn’t make sense. The whole point is that the rabbits want McGregor to leave... he does too! They actively sabotage themselves by pulling all these stunts on him. If they had just left him alone for 2 weeks, he could’ve sold the house and left. He probably would’ve sold it to some rich family that wouldn’t care about a garden full of animals! But instead they realize Thomas doesn’t like them and decide to electrocute him and humiliate him because he doesn’t want them in his garden for a specific amount of time that has an end date. Until the rabbits bothered him, Thomas didn’t care about them! If they had left him alone, he wouldn’t have ‘fallen in love’ with Bea and their other problems wouldn’t have happened too! They caused their own misery! What is this plot?! 

4. Bea is just an idiot and I can’t stand her. No shade to Rose Byrne because she is literally so pretty but the character is very dumb and annoying. She’s supposed to be Beatrix Potter which is also a very strange inclusion considering Beatrix was a real person and had her own life, just saying. But anyway, we can see early on in the film that Bea can communicate with the rabbits. They respect her and listen to her. So why does she let them, and at times, instigate them towards McGregor’s garden! She knows how dangerous it is and that Peter’s dad died there. They literally have the whole forest and her property and they can’t stay out of a 10 square foot garden? If she cares about those rabbits so much why doesn’t she grow some vegetables? Why doesn’t she stop them from bothering the guy who clearly wants nothing to do with them? She’s so caught up in ‘respecting nature’ and ‘being an artist’ that she’s so oblivious to everything else in her life and completely useless in every other way. Thomas deserves a better partner and Beatrix Potter deserved a better interpretation.

5. The characters are mean. Peter Rabbit is supposed to be a bit of a rascal and a scamp. He’s a troublemaker compared to his goody-two shoes siblings. We know this, it’s in the books. But everyone in this movie, especially Peter, is just so mean! Every other comment he makes is something disparaging against Benjamin or one of the other animals. He spends the whole movie being rude and dismissive and cocky. We’re supposed to root for this character? At times, considering his dialogue, Peter seems like more of an antagonist than Thomas. At least Thomas is nice to Bea, at least Thomas, in the beginning, only tries to keep the rabbits out and not hurt them. Peter’s a jerk and I don’t like his character. I don’t like any of the animal characters, they’re all so sarcastic and unsympathetic. So much of the ‘humor’ comes from one of the characters making fun of another and the jokes fall flat because of it. Beatrix Potter’s characters have such a softness to them, they invoke warm and cozy feelings. This movie was such an insult to her work.

Right before Peter Rabbit came out, I saw the Mr. Rogers documentary. Seeing him be so passionate about children’s media really made me think about the stories we give our kids. They deserve better than this recycled garbage! They deserve better characters and better stories. They deserve to be treated like human beings with brains and feelings and talents, instead of just mindless meat bags we plop in front of a screen to keep them out of our hair. I’m not saying that we can’t have entertainment that’s silly or stupid but when every kid’s movie is exactly the same, I start to feel bad. Children deserve quality! 

So here’s my pitch for a Peter Rabbit movie: Up until Thomas goes to drop the rabbits in the river, everything is the same. I would make Peter and his siblings nicer and more inclined to work together as a team but otherwise everything is the same. Then, right before Thomas drops the bag, he stops. What is he doing? What has his life become? He’s about to kill innocent animals because he lost his job? He sinks down on the bridge and starts to cry. He starts telling the rabbits, because he has no one else, how terrible he feels. His job was the most important thing to him. He has no friends, no hobbies, no direction. He doesn’t know what to do with his life now. Maybe Peter pokes his head out and snuggles up to Thomas, showing empathy. Thomas goes on to say that while he enjoyed his job, he realizes now that he wasn’t truly happy and that getting revenge won’t make him happy. He looks down and sees the binoculars, the first gift he’s gotten in years. He looks and sees the rabbits curling up against him and he thinks maybe he doesn’t have to sell the house. Maybe he doesn’t have to go back to his life. So, with the help of his friend Bea and the rabbits, Thomas learns how to calm down and enjoy life. He learns to appreciate the small things and respect the beauty of nature. Maybe there’s a funny montage of Thomas trying to mow the lawn or garden. Maybe he makes everyone dinner with his vegetables and it’s really bad and everyone makes a funny face. It ends (a little like the original ending) with Thomas realizing that he may have lost his successful glamorous job in the city, but now he has friends. Now he has people who care about him and good food on his table. So the movie ends on a toy shop. Thomas is showing a little boy how to fly a remote control plane. Benjamin and Cottontail are in the middle of a tea party with a little girl. Bea is wrapping a gift for customer and Flopsy gets her paw stuck in the bow. Everything seems perfect and wonderful when we hear a huge crash offscreen. PETER! End Credits

[makeste]

some asks about BnHA 241 and 240 and then some random other asks

I agree with this completely, anon (especially given his attitude throughout the rest of the chapter), but I didn’t edit my initial response since I think there’s a good likelihood that he still deadpanned the line despite being 100% sincere. one could say he was Accidentally Sarcastic. anyways yeah, Todoroki Shouto is a disaster more at 11. 

(but also, he’s totally right and Bakugou is in full-blown denial over their blossoming friendship. because he already decided that they’re Not Friends, and thus he has to actively work to maintain that status now. which Todoroki is making very difficult these days! can you fucking do your part to keep the fucking rivalry going, Icy-Hot?? can you at least try?? why does he have to do all the work. sometimes he forgets for a moment and Todo catches him off guard and he responds normally without thinking and doesn’t realize it until later, and god. why is everything and everyone so stupid.)

I have not forgotten (though I did mix up Pixie-Bob with Mandalay though woop)! and that annoyed me too. we only have like six female pros out there as it is. why do half of them (looking at you too, Midnight) have to be mildly sex-crazed. I know it’s not serious and they’re not actually being serious, but still, is it really asking so much to get some female pros whose eccentricities are less specifically tailored to common male fantasies. you’re a fucking hero Pixie-Bob! you’re a fucking earthbender and you’re hot as heck. why are you so worried about not being able to Get A Man. with Mt. Lady it at least fits more with her general personality from what we’ve seen, I guess. anyways, y’all know I love like 98% of this series, but this is part of the 2%, so. it is what it is.

Tomura is Endgame Thanos, a.k.a. the most sinister and most genuinely frightening of the Thanoses. this really isn’t on track to end well sob.

ah, my bad. (regardless, it was still dramatic af.)

I think she’s a six-year-old (?? she seems six-ish, idk) girl who was terrified of her father and trying to stay under his radar (which was frankly the smart thing to do based on what we’ve seen), and was trying to teach her younger brother how to do the same, and I don’t blame her at all for throwing Tenko under the bus (if that’s indeed what happened); I’m sure she just panicked and didn’t mean it. she’s just a kid. -- was just a kid. anyways she was super cute and would have made a fucking awesome hero, and her death is easily the one I’m still the most raw about out of that whole fucking nightmare. I’m not getting over that. I want her to still be alive; at one point I was convinced of a conspiracy theory that AFO had secretly spared her too (because two Shimura heirs to manipulate are better than one), and Tomura only believed that she was dead due to his fragmented memories. but that seems less likely post-chapter 236.

so yeah, I’m still very upset about this. she was good and kind and loved her brother and had a lot of spirit and she did not even remotely deserve what happened to her.

thank you so much!! one of the best parts of fandom is interacting with other people and reading everyone’s different takes and theories. lord knows I miss a lot of stuff when I read, even when I’m trying very hard to pay attention. so I love when other people point stuff out and bring up ideas I hadn’t thought about.

also! without exception, every single person I’ve ever interacted with in this fandom on tumblr has been polite and courteous and civil as fuck, even on the occasions when we disagree, and I absolutely can’t take credit for that. people are just cool. so thank you everyone. (and particular shoutout to @thequietmanno1, who for some reason I can’t tag, but whom this ask is almost certainly referring to specifically.)

lmao anon this made my fucking day. thank you!!

all right, here goes!

a) this is possible for sure in that as a rule, I never put anything past AFO, and I don’t doubt for a second he’d be capable of this. but, it would kind of suck though. specifically it would suck for Tomura, who’s only just starting to come into his own at long last, and who has gone through quite a lot to get to this point. like, that would be devastating to see him reduced to a literal puppet after all of that. and if it did happen, I don’t know what the odds would be of him actually being “saved” after that (All Might at least would try, but I can’t see anyone else being concerned enough to bother. well except for the rest of the League, come to think of it. that could be interesting), and I’d be really sad if that ended up being how he went out. these things usually don’t end up working out too well for the body snatchee.

plus, this also hinges on whether or not AFO is capable of transferring his quirk to Tomura’s body. if not, there’s no way he’d take the tradeoff, regardless of how powerful Tomura’s own quirk has become at this point. that would just be a really bad deal. like trading the cow for beans, except these ones aren’t even magic beans, just like. normal beans. but if he does have a way of transferring the AFO quirk, then yeah. although he could take anyone’s body then if that was the case, and I can think of a few targets who just might be even more tempting than his protege. All Might’s protege, for one. ...you know what, this line of thinking is starting to get a little too horrifying so let’s move on to the other theory lol.

(b) a few people have mentioned the Shimura Momo theory to me, but to be totally honest, I can’t see much of a logical basis for it other than them bearing a slight resemblance and having similar hairstyles. Inko has also been brought up as potentially being related to Nana for the same reasons. it’d be cool, no doubt, but for me, I need more evidence than just that. I just don’t see how this would advance the plot or the characters’ storylines in any meaningful way. I guess it could potentially tie Momo in more to the central plot, but it’d be kind of a weird way to do it, idk.

then again I’m one to talk, because until fairly recently I was on board with Hagakure of all people turning out to be a Shimura (Hana, to be specific). she’s the traitor, she’s invisible, we never did find out what Hana’s quirk was, and this would mean that Hana was still alive this whole time which would be GREAT, because seriously fuck you Horikoshi!! but yeah that doesn’t seem likely now either. dammit.

anyway, so I’ll just say that both of these theories are possible, but for me personally, in order to be sold on a specific theory I need to be able to see how it logically fits within the storyline and how it moves the story forward. like, Dabi being Todoroki Touya is something I’m 100% on board with, because that’s an established mystery in the series (who is Touya, what happened to him, who is Dabi, etc.), and Dabi fits into place with the evidence we have, and it gives us a lot of Todoroki drama and gives Endeavor and Shouto a personal connection to the Leagu... Pliff. but for something like the Momo theory, I would need there to be some indication that there’s a third sibling we don’t know about, and some hinting about there being more to Momo’s past than we know, and right now I don’t see either of those things, so it’s hard to get on board. hopefully that makes sense.

anon I really like that you phrased this as an inevitability lol. (and I am 100% on board.)

assuming this happens at the very end of the series, I like to think Tomura and the rest of his gang will manage to “escape” the heroes (“oh no... Tomura... he’s getting away... this is awful... somebody stop him” meanwhile no one is making even the slightest effort to move lol), at which point they will live the rest of their lives happily ever after as Lovable Outlaws and All-Around Scamps. like, maybe they’ll still commit some crimes, but they won’t be like serious crimes or anything. they’ll have more of a Guardians of the Galaxy vibe, maybe. I want them to be happy and I don’t want them to go to jail even though they’re teeeeeeeechnically murderers, I GUESS (look, nobody’s perfect!!). but maybe they steal the occasional priceless artifact and inadvertently wind up saving the world. seems like the best compromise.

lol I don’t know what this means either. like in the way a Youtuber has their own brand?? or like Frito-Lays. idk all I really do is talk a lot about an extremely popular manga, so I don’t think that’d really count?? I’m fine with this just being a little tumblr discussion blog haha.

so I’ve gotten like a half dozen asks and messages about this lol. (someone actually told me a very specific detail about said past! so just to remind everyone, I’m spoiler-free on Vigilantes right now guys, I’m sorry. I know it’s no fun.) I regret to admit that I still have not yet gotten around to it. I don’t know what it is, but I’m having a lot of trouble reading new stuff right now. I tried to start the other new BnHA spin-off which @temperatezone told me about (and btw no I did not know about it, so thank you!!) (and also! BnHA has THREE SEPARATE FUCKING SPIN-OFFS right now, how fucking crazy is that. like, I don’t want to accuse a manga series of literally trying to take over the world, but!! seriously that’s just insane), which has an amazing premise, but I haven’t had time/been in the right mindset to start that yet either. it sucks. I’m sorry. I’m working on it. ;;

press f to pay respects to what could have been, guys. they literally had it all. class, an ironic acronym, you name it. and now it’s just PLF. the Iron Patriot of villain organization names.

[jjkpls]

The Scamps (m) (Harry Potter!AU #3)

> genre : smut, some sort of fluff i guess idk

> pairing : min yoongi x reader

> words : 3.3k

> warning : bad bad language, spanking, derogatory terms

> Min Yoongi (Slytherin, 6th yr) Children behave That's what they say when we're together And watch how you play They don't understand

/The Harry Potter!AU Masterlist/

"Could you tell me of what use chizpurfles can be ?"

"No." Silence overtakes the room. The majority of the class is not really surprised by the answer Yoongi gave, or even by the insolence his indifference transpires. But the new Professor of Potions, Professor Delaney-Podmore, has obviously not been briefed about Yoongi's character.

"You ca-can't?" Professor Delaney-Podmore blinks hard behind his thin glasses. There are droplets of sweat visibly slipping along the side of his forehead. Yoongi is not moved though.

"No."

"What a fucking idiot..." The Professor turns around so fast, you'd think he's standing on a spinning wheel. He stares gravely at you, eyes threatening to fall out of their sockets, break his lenses and roll on the ground.

"I'm sorry, Miss-"

"Cause you know?" Yoongi asks, attention driven now to you with an animation glinting in the gaze. Even his voice seems to finally come alive; you can hear the harshness and the coldness shading his tone.

"Well, I'm not the one who's been asked to answer, am I?" You singsong with a nasty side grin. Your head, chin stuck in your palm, tilts to the side, eyebrows raised high in mock wondering.

"Then why don't you just shut the hell up?" He is fired up now. You can tell by the little shrug his head does, ever so slightly, as he glares intensely at you. Everybody is watching the scene unfold with terrified excitement. They love to see those outbreaks you two have quite often since it's a great source of entertainment. That being said, they're never too comfortable as if scared that the tickling bombs you two are might, unexpectedly, burst in one of their faces.

"I'm sorry if I can't stand you making me waste my precious time by being a fucking moron."

"MISS!" Professor Delaney-Podmore finally explodes, all attention fixating on him. His face red and look haggard, the young man is visibly trembling. "This behaviour is unacceptable. I-I demand you to stop now or you'll have to leave my class." You don't really flinch under his gaze. He looks too unsure. If Yoongi can't get you to shudder, probably no one can. You know to be reasonable though. Especially since your goal has been accomplished -you've wakened up the old man. Therefore, you simply shrug and keep your mouth shut, your eyes following Yoongi's small form sauntering through the classroom, back to the seat behind yours.

"Shut the fuck up." Yoongi mumbles before you can even open your mouth, loud enough for you to hear but discreet enough so that the whole class and Delaney-Podmore don't divert their focus back on you two.

"Dickhead."

Taehyung, eyebrows frown, observes Yoongi smirking contently to himself. He opens his mouth, wanting to say something, to ask a question, to just express his confusion but the words just won't come out. He has a lot of questions. He is not the only one having noticed this bizarre animosity constantly animating your interactions. But he knows he'll probably won't get anything concrete from Yoongi so he just decides to give up -the nasty side glance the interested threw his way helping for the decision.

A loud smack, a body slumping on a messy humid bed, and a dark ominous chuckle. Yoongi shakes his head in disbelief. There is only you, the ever unable-to-crack-a-smile-embittered bitch, to be laughing your head off when you're getting your ass spanked hard.

"You're not going to apologize?" His voice hardly raises at the end. He already knows the answer. And you already know that he knows so you just chuckle some more, shaking your panties-covered ass in front of his unwavering gaze. He grabs severely your hips to keep you still and without a warning, strike a couple of blows, first on the left cheek and once he finds the perfect red shade he likes, proceeds to move on and offer the same treatment to the other one. He doesn't slow down, doesn't soften down even when he can hear your whimpers getting higher and broken. He knows how far he can take you. "You really were a pain today."

"When am I not?" He hums knowingly. You are indeed a pain in the ass. That's actually the reason why he can deal with you since he's the same.

"Do you wanna cum?" You nod your head, mumbling an approval in the pillow. "Do bitches get to cum?" Yoongi asks, voice slow and pensive as if he's wondering out loud a serious existential question. You're quick to answer that yes, they do! but he is still languid, unhurried, as his hands pet your red cheeks. "I'm pretty sure they don't, ___."

"They do, Yoongi. Make me cum."

"Is that an order?" There is an unmissable edge to his voice. Do you want me to be meaner? he is asking. You don't really care though. You're not sure what your games during daylight are, but if anything they are probably foreplay. You hate teasing and you don't need him to take his time. You hate him taking his time especially when you've been ready for him for hours already.

"Yoongi, I'm bored. Make me cum, now."

And it's weird that you don't find it suspicious, but when Yoongi crawls behind you on the bed, mouth attaching greedily to your flesh, all you do is grin in the pillows, self complimenting yourself internally for what you think is a new win over him. You know what it means when he is hungrily licking and biting and scratching with his teeth, his large veiny hands meddling with everything his mouth can't take care of -your asscheeks, your thighs, your hips, your breast. There is one difference that should have, maybe, been a hint to you, the stinging of his ministration upon the already over abused skin of your ass. He's been meaner during the spanking, he'll be meaner with the rest. The thought may have occurred at some point, but the feeling of his hot breath hitting your now exposed centre empties your mind of any sort of preoccupation. It's just his expert mouth standing just a few centimetres away from the place you want him the most.

"Please." It's totally unexpected and so quiet, you hope he's missed it. But of course, he doesn't. As much of an old man Yoongi usually is, when he's with you, he's all alert.

"It's been so long, I forgot how much I love having you beg for me."

"Shut the fu-" You start, highly annoyed by the smugness dripping from his voice, not paying much attention to how you couldn't feel his breath hitting your skin when he was talking. There's a very short instant of heavy silence dominating the room, where you just stand there, on all four, exposed ass hanging high in the air awaiting; then the door to your room slams shut. That fucking asshole. Of course, he'd be that fucking mean.

There is an awkward silence hanging between the little circle of acquaintances. You don't seem too fazed. Nor does Yoongi. But Jimin and your best friend are looking between you two and themselves, eyes wide, and perspiration almost shining on their foreheads. They know this conversation can only go wrong. They've never -no one has ever- witnessed a normal, civil conversation take place between you two. It's always shouts, and insults, and ominous glares and even wand threatenings at times. But that's your usual, casual encounters.

Today is not a usual encounter. You walked in, with a weirdly jumpy step, sat right in front of Yoongi who was "hanging out" -meaning, he's just sat there next to his friends, not feigning listening or taking part in any way in the conversation happening- with the two other Slytherins, and proceeded to announce that you've found a date for the party that Hogwarts will be hosting in a week, even though nobody asked. Jimin is sure that Yoongi will be the first to point this detail out but strangely enough, he remains quiet. Gaze hardly focused on you.

"That's great, ___! Who is it? Do we know him?" Your best friend asks.

"He's the Seeker of Ravenclaw's team."

"Ravenclaw?"

"He's very tall and muscular. Very hot." Yoongi can feel his blood boil. It's not so much what you're saying. You're choosing your words thoughtfully. Yoongi is a tiny little thing compared to most guys, he knows that. And quite frankly he doesn't give a single fuck since, as testifies your always sneaking in his pants, it doesn't injure his sex-appeal in any way. He feels anger because that's the natural reaction he has to you, in every daily circumstance, and because he knows you're trying to annoy him. You're always trying to mess with him.  "Are you going, Min Yoongi?"

"You know I'm not."

"Are you sad because no one wants to go with you? I'm sorry Min Yoongi, maybe try being a little less of a dickhead."

"And I'll try wearing my uniform skirt like a crop top too, as sluts do. That surely will get me a date, wouldn't it?"

"I don't know what sluts do, Min Yoongi."

At each pronunciation of his full name, said with this insufferable patronizing tone, it becomes harder for him to refrain himself from grabbing you by the hair, uncover your ass and spank you right here, in the middle of the common room; he'd do it until you've cried so much your whole shirt would be soaked in tears.

For now, the common room is filled with an uncomfortable atmosphere. Yoongi, not that he cares, has noticed a few younger kids leaving abruptly when you two started talking. The ones that decided to stay, have retreated in the corner and as if in fear to interrupt, started to whisper their conversations.

"Anyways" There is an awkward cough before your best friend starts again, obviously attempting to divert the conversation and diffuse the tension. "Jiminie, you're bringing your girlfriend?"

"Yes. It'd be our first ball together, I'm really excited!" He is all smiles and starry eyes, nodding his head with enthusiasm. He's so grateful both for the question itself, and for the brave attempt she is making.

"Oh yeah, the squib!" Jimin's jaw goes slack as Yoongi stares straight at you; waiting for what you're going to say with obvious interest. He wouldn't admit it but it would tickle him unpleasantly if you were to start insulting one of his very only friends. From the bright, carnivorous-like smirk adorning your red lips, he can tell you know. "Hasn't she been kicked out yet? Or at least, hasn't she quit? I mean if I were her, I would have quit fucking ages ago. She's embarrassing herself in every fucking class."

"Why are you pretending not to know, you're sharing half of your classes with her."

"Am I talking to you Min Yoongi?" You give him the darkest look. He isn't moved, simply stares back at you awaiting.  "Now that I think about it, you're luckier than this guy, Jimin. Even if she's a squib, at least you have someone."

"You think you do?" He is quick to answer, nonchalance becoming harder to keep up now. You can see the corner of his lip twitch slightly.

"I do, old man. I've just told you about it."

"Well, now that's just sad if you think he's in for anything else than your ass."

"I'm pretty sure he wouldn't mind having my pussy too."

"___!!" Your best friend yells, getting up from her chair, ready to grab your arm to drag you out. You'd think she'd be used to your antics by now but the poor girl is so red in the face. You don't let her move you though, the bickering is not over. After being such a dick last time, you just want to piss him off for real. It's pretty nice having little to no sense of shame or embarrassment when dealing with this guy.

"You're so gross." Yoongi mumbles, shaking his head in faux disbelief.

"And so are you. You're just bitter because I'm still hot enough to get laid but you're not."

"I'm bitter? Over what? Not being a whore?" He sniggers. "I'm perfectly fine knowing my dick won't fall off at some point from overexposing it to all the trash your cunt plays with."

"Dicks and vaginas don't just fall off, moron. But how would you know?" You're back with the patronizing, oh-silly-little-thing-let-me-teach-you-life type of voice and you can see, visibly, the annoyance reaching its peak on Yoongi's neck vein.

Only the arrival of an impatient prefect can finally bring a semblance of peace in the room. He tells you guys that you're being a nuisance to everybody in the common room and that you need to either shut the hell up or just leave if you want to keep arguing. There's a tense silence hanging after his impromptu intervention. Everyone is wondering if the two tickling bombs will burst now at this brave but innocent prefect face. Yoongi is the one making the decision for the both of you. After a while of pondering the question over in his mind, menacing eyes staring right back at yours, he decides to leave the chair and slowly, saunters to his dorm room.

"You don't deserve kisses, ___." He whispers, turning his head away for your eager mouth to meet his cheek. You smirk, tend your neck to try again to catch his red lips between yours but his arms push himself further away, making himself completely unattainable. His hips have slowed down too. He's looking down at you but his eyes don't meet yours. You frown, deeply annoyed.

"You're too touchy."

"Am I?" Yoongi asks simply. His tone sounds calm and collected. Too calm for it not to be frightening. He actually sounds ominous as hell. He slows down to a complete halt and drags himself out of your warmth, ignoring your protests. "Ride me." Eager to keep going, ignoring his bad mood, you jump on your new-found seat. "Don't touch yourself." He summons, and when he sees your burning hands tucked knowingly against his stomach, he lazily slips his hands behind his head, closes his eyes, breathing out a long pleased sigh when you start riding him.

He looks quite handsome like that. Traits all relaxed, pearl white skin shimmering slightly under the sunset light coming from the wide-open window, gold-reflecting eyelashes resting softly on his face. You want to kiss his mouth again but know better than try. So instead, to submerge more in the uncommon peacefulness hanging between you, you decide to ride him in the most languid fashion. Taking your time to slide up and down his length, deeply, to build it up for the grand final when you'll do it the way you two love to cum to.

The thing is, Yoongi, as too often, has a hidden agenda. Not long after you've started, you see the line of his eyebrows dip down slightly in the middle, and then a low groan erupts from the very back of his throat as you feel his cock twitch in you.

"No- you- did you really-?" He opens his eyelids on brown irises shining with mischief. Of course he did, Yoongi's assholeness is a never-ending pit filled to the brim with fucking annoying tricks all able to piss you off more than the last one. Yoongi is the only dude you've known that wouldn't mind looking like a premature ejaculator just to irk you.

"'Hope you have a good time at the ball." He has the audacity to add, whilst he not so gently makes you roll off of his body and into the mattress. You could say something, ask for him to stay or just insult him but it would feed his evil contentment and you just resolve on swallowing down the anger.

"I mean it's complicated."

"What is?" Taehyung sighs deeply, bending over the small stone wall, arms dangling in the air like two flabby defeated creatures. Yoongi simply watches him. It's quite unusual to find him in this mood. All defeatist and low-energized.

"It's Jimin. And she's really in love with him. I wouldn't mind if it were anyone else but Jimin is kind of..." Yoongi doesn't say anything. He stares blankly at his friend, which quite frankly is way more dedication than he is used to receiving from him. Therefore, he elaborates. "Isn't he the perfect guy?"

"Hm." Yoongi nods evasively. Yes indeed, Jimin is quite good in his own kind. But he doesn't feel like not being him means they're doomed.

Taehyung, tired of the lack of active responses, straightens up and glares, a new sort of energy found."I don't even know why I'm talking with you, what do you know?"

"You came to me." Yoongi groans, jaws tight and fists twitching from his effort put in not being rude to his friend. They say he's an asshole but they don't realize how hard it is on him dealing with all those problematic cases.

They really don't see it, Yoongi is assured, when Taehyung keeps talking, completely ignoring him, it seems. "Seriously. Maybe I should help you more than you should help me."

"I don't need any help in that department."

"You flirt like an elementary school kid, Yoongi." He says, eyes rolling all the way up and down, with a little shake of his head.

"What?"

"You know, like those kids that spit on and pull at their crushes' hair to seduce them." Yoongi frowns. It's the first time he hears this shit still Taehyung says it like it's an actual fact admitted by all. He knows people don't really get his friendship with you. He thought they believed you two to be at most enemies, and that you just love bickering with each other for entertainment purposes. He didn't know they thought he was attempting to flirt with you. He is not attempting anything. You're the one begging for him to turn your ass bloody red. He doesn't even have to ask!

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Hm." Taehyung smiles knowingly. He meets his friend's eyes, the ones totally unresponsive to the amusement shining in his. But suddenly, his smile drops when he catches sight of the said witch walking right in their direction, with a suspicious hop in her steps. "Oh shit. I'll see you later."

For a split second, Yoongi considers saying something in your defence. Something about how he is being ridiculous, you're not a fucking troll. But then you're here, you call him a dickhead as you always do and since no one is around anymore, you don't waste a second grabbing his hand between your claws to start dragging him somewhere more private. Yeah, maybe he won't ever say anything in your defence.

Your gaze follows his silhouette as he moves about the room, swiftly tidying up. With the wand he just used to clean up the mess he's made on your thighs, he elevates the dress you wore at the ball, discarding of it in the corner. You smile tiredly, a hand reaching out to touch the burning skin of your neck and bosom. He's been so thoroughly covering up the few hickeys your date had made before him, it makes you giddy inside even if you won't admit it. There's a loud commotion coming from the common room. People are still celebrating, wanting to make the most of tonight, since most will be leaving tomorrow for the winter break.

"Do you mind if I stay for the night?" Yoongi sighs deeply, letting himself fall beside you on the bed. He closes his eyes, toss under the covers for a bit before curling up on himself, ready to sleep. Still awaiting, you kick him in the shin.

"You know you don't have to ask.” You grin. You do know. The kids outside the room are still screaming and laughing hysterically. Yoongi besides you grunts. You consider going out to threaten them to shut the hell up but Yoongi's bed feels so warm and he feels so nice next to you, you decide to just ignore them, wrapping your arms around him and pressing your lips to his shoulder.