#if the same happens here I'll have to reconsider all my life decisions

[ghostclowning]

[doudouneverte]

Home

a/n: sometime i think a lot...

*not my GIF* (but can we talk about her smile please?)

Wanda Maximoff x Kryptonian!Reader; Pietro Maximoff x Female!Reader (best friend); Kara Zor-El x Sister!Reader; Carol Danver x Female!Reader (platonic); Avenger x Female!Reader

Summary: Y/n is a kryptonian who lend on earth after the explosion of Krypton. She grew up in Sokovia and fall in love of a certain brunette but after she decide to leave to learn more about her family. When she come back she's surprise by the fact that her two best friends power now.

Type: Fluff

Warning: nothing maybe some light reference at 'night activities'

note: the sokovian is actually romanian translate from google traduction so, sorry not sorry

word count: ~3694

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You were a baby when Krypton exploded, your parents sent you to Earth. They hope you could live a good life, they gave you a blanket and your sister gave you her special necklace like a gift and a charm.

Your pod lend on earth, in a country called Sokovia. Despite you hadn't the most luxurious life, you loved your life there. You met your best friend Pietro and her sister Wanda when you were three. The three lost your parents during the war, you quickly became inseparable. With time you developed feeling for the girl and you asked her out when you were 16, fortunately for you she had the same feelings and she accepted to be your girlfriend just after your first date.

You had the best life, you thought. At 15 you discovered your powers, it was strange and you were afraid to hurt your best friends but the reassured you and even help you to control your powers. After three years with the love of your life and your best friend, you decided to learn more about your past. You found your old pod and you didn't know how but you activated a record of a woman she said she was your biological mom. She explained you what happened to Krypton and why she had sent you here, she also told you that you had a family before Earth, you saw an hologram of your family and in your pod you found a picture they took just after your birth.

"Hei, iubirea mea. Esti bine (Hey, my love. Are you alright?)" Wanda asked you. It's been one week since you found about your origins and you spent all your time locked in your bedroom, you started the picture and your blanket.

"Da, nu-ți face griji (Yeah, don't worry)." You said but she can sense you were lying. She sat next to you and wrapped her arms around shoulder.

"I'm here, I'll not let you. Never." She whispered

"Thanks you." You replied and after that there was a comfy silence until you broke it. "I think I need to leave." You confessed and she looked at you confused "for the past week I tried to learn the Kryptonian, and I think I can use my pod to find more information about Krypton. It's weird no? An entire planet exploded from a reason unknown and nobody try to found why?" you were now completely in her lap.

"Do you have anywhere to started to search?" She asked, and you could hear the worry in her voice.

"Yeah, I'll started to search the debris of my planet and I'll asked at the planets nearby." you replied.

"You're leaving?" Pietro asked from the doorway

"Don't worry prostesc (silly), I'll just leave for few months and if it's too dangerous I'll come back quickly I promise." you reassured him.

The next you were ready to leave. You were in front of your pod with the twins, Wanda kissed you and for a second you reconsider your decision. "Ew, gross. Get a room." The boys said and you both laughed

"Oh if you know what we did yesterday." You teased him and Wanda punched your shoulder

"Y/n!!" she yelled and you laughed

"I didn't want to know that." Pietro said and Wanda cover her face with her hands.

You let your girlfriend to hug your best friend (and if everything goes well your future brother-in-law) "promise me you won't do anything dangerous little boy, and keep an eye on my girlfriend." You said

"Promise E.T" he replied and you chuckled.

You walked to Wanda and hugged her too "promise me to not forgot me and keep an eye on him, he's not the smarter" you said, and you decided to not considered the protest of her twin.

"I promise dragă (darling)" she replied, and she sealed the promise with a kiss. "But promise to came sound and safe." she said

"I promise" you replied and kissed her. You jumped on your pod and entered the data with your two weeks skills of Kryptonian. You said your goodbye and now you leave for the space, for the first time since you came in Earth.

The journey was calm, you were like a kid in Christmas day when you watched all the planets and the start you met. After two days of travel, you were here. There was nothing like you thought, just the rest of asteroid. You wanted to use your power to fly and examined more but you couldn't. And now you started to feel it, you were weak like pretty weak. You wanted to go in another planet when a big ship just swallowed your pod.

On the mysterious shop you were greet by two man with weapons, you first reflexe was to use your heat vision to disarm them but nothing came out. It was little cringe but you tried to use your cold breath and again nothing came. Okay now it was cringe. The two men exchanged a look they seem to have intern discussion and suddenly one of them just grabbed your arm, you tried to defend yourself but you couldn't.

"Hey let me go!!" You yelled but they just dragged you to a tiny room. On of them leave and returned ten minutes later with a woman. She was blonde with blue eyes, she familiar.

"Who are you?" she asked,

"Who are you, you? I'm just a girl who came here to have responses." you replied

"Nobody came here since a long time now." she said "only the fools came here, but you don't like a foo--" she was cut off by a third man.

"General Zor-El, we found the ship she used to come here. It's a Kryptonian pod" he said and the woman wided her eyes she was about to say something but the man spoke again "and we found that." She handled her, your red blanket.

"Hey! Don't touch this." you yelled and the woman looked at you but her expression changed, she was not angry, she was confused.

"Where do you find it?" She asked

"My parents gave it to me when they sent me in Earth. That's why I came here because I want responses" you explained and she started to cry.

She approached you and noticed the necklace you wore. "Y/n?" she asked with a little voice.

"How do you know my name?" now it was your turn to be confuse, and when she hugged you that just increase the confusion.

"I thought I would never see you again" she said. You didn't know what you could reply so you just hugged her back. She broke the hug and examined you "you became a pretty woman" she said and you blushed. You wanted to say something but she looked at a guard "Tell my mom and my dad I come back now. I have someone who should probably want to see them" she ordered and the man did.

"You didn't tell me your name." You said awkwardly

"I'm Kara. Your sister" she replied, and she cried again. For the past nineteens years she thought she lost this title but now you were here, with her.

You remembered the recorded from the pods, yeah it was true Kara she's your sister. You hugged her tightly, "I'm happy to see you." You said and rubbed your back. It was the first someone expected your adoptive parents or the Maximoff did that to you, but even if you knew her only since few minutes her touch was warm and welcoming.

After that, you spend all the fly to talk with Kara, she replied at your question about your past and she explained more what happened to your mother planet.

"General Zor-El, we are here." A man said. You lend only two minutes later. You grabbed a suitcase you took with you. And it was heavy, of course you packed it when you were on earth so it was easy to transport but now it was an other world.

Your sister didn't wait to long before she dragged you in a big house. When you enter you saw the woman from the record and your vision was blurry from the tears. You didn't waited you ran to hugged her tightly.

"Welcome home." she whispered to your ears

"Yeah, I'm home now." you said. Your dad came and place his hand on your shoulder, you gave him a hug too. And after you met a other man, he was more young but older than your sister.

"Y/n, this Kal-El your cousin. Kal-El, this Y/n the little sister of Kara." Your mom introduced you and you hugged him too

"Wow you're the most muscular man I met." you said and everybody laughed.

After some hours to know each other, your mom and your sister decided to bring you with them for a walk.

"So how is the life in Earth?" your sister asked you

"It's pretty good," you replied and you smiled when you thought about Wanda.

"Did you meet good people?" Your mom asked this time

"Yeah." you replied "I mean there are some ones who are not pretty good but yeah. I had the luck to be raised by the Y/l/n, they were goods parents. And I met Wanda and Pietro, they are twins and my best friends."

"What do you mean by 'they were good parents'?" Alura remarked

You paused a moment, it's been a long time since you spoke about the parents who raised you. You didn't really spoke about it with the twins because they had the same issues.

"They're dead." you reply calmly "there was a war and lot people died. Them and Wanda's parents too." you explained

"I'm sorry" the blonde girl said.

"It's fine it's been a while now" you looked at the sky for moment "it should their anniversary soon." You added. "But don't talk about bad thing now. I have a lot of questions. Like the first why I can't use my power since I was in front of the rest of Krypton. Or is there anything who could hurt us because on earth I feel like invincible. Oh and will I be blind if i use my x-ray on a mirror and it reflects on my eyes?"

Your enthusiasm made their happi. They replied by 'red sun'; 'kryptonite' and 'why do you even though about it?'. At the night you decided to stay a little longer to learn about all. And Kal-El and Kara proposed you to train with them you know just in case. After one month in Argo you fully felt like home. Everybody was kind and took their time to explained everything you didn't understand. Your sister proposed you to help her with a rescue mission, a Kryptonian was stuck in a planet since few years and he finally found a way to send a SOS message.

"Wow, it's beautiful." You said with your face against the window. "Hey Kara look, i think were are here" you pointed a planet.

"Yeah" she replied "you need to prepare to go" she said. When the ship lended you were one of the first outside. Since you started to train with them, Kal-El gave you a tactical suit, it was black with a white 'S' logo on the chest. You were glad to be a part of the mission.

"So where are we going?" You asked at your sister

"Followed us, I tracked the signal." she said and you did. Thirty minutes later you were in front of a base, Kal-El didn't want to be discrete and just exploded the door with his super strength. You followed them inside. Their was a lot of guard but fortunately for you they were not strong enough to beat the three of you. You almost started to question why they need you, this planet is in yellow sun solar system and every one seems weak.

But when you enter in hallway who lead to the room where the Kryptonian was, your started to feel weak yourself, your felt like you were burning from the inside and you couldn't use your power.

"Kara, I'm sick" you said. When you looked at the two older Kryptonian they were in the same condition as your.

"It's kryptonite Y/n" Kal-El replied, "we didn't planned this." he added. Now you understood why the Kryptonian needed your help. The entire hallway was covered of kryptonite, it was suffocating, you thought you were dying; two guards dragged you in the cell but before they could closed the door a wall exploded.

You see her, a woman who were glowing with honey hair and brown globe; but what caught your attention was her suit, blue and red with a tiny touch of gold. She looked at you and seemed to understand you were not from this planet and not in a good stare because she helped you immediately.

"Who are you?" She asked when she led you out of the base.

"I'm Y/n." You replied

"Nice to meet you Y/n. I'm Captain Marvel but you can call me Carol." She said. "You're not from here right?" She asked

"No, I'm from Earth. I'm a Kryptonian from earth." You replied, and she seemed to examine you.

"But what are you doing her?" She finally asked

"I wanted to learn about my origins so I travel to my mother planet and I met my family. And then after my sister proposed me to help her on a mission." You replied and she nodded.

"Okay I see." she looked at the base. "You should stay here I have something to finish there." she informed you. And started to glow again.

"Carol?" You called her. She looked at you "my sister and my cousin are still in there can you save them?" You asked and she smiled.

"I'm a superhero it's my job." She replied, and she leaves.

It took her only 15 minutes to take down the base and complete her mission. She came back with Kara, Kal-El and the Kryptonian who needed help. On your way back to Argo you talked a lot with Carol, she told you about her past on earth; about Fury, the Skrull, about Monica and Maria; and you told her about Wanda, Pietro and Sokovia. Carol spent some day with you and trained with you she didn't find you a nickname 'Supergirl' but unfortunately for you she couldn't stay. You spent lot of months to trained and one day you decided it was the time to leave. You love your family but you need to see the twins and you missed your girlfriend a lot.

The day of your departure every one was emotional and it broke your heart but you had to leave. You said your goodbye to your parents and Kal-El when Kara came to you.

"I know you decide to become a hero when you'll be back on earth so I asked some help to make this." She said while she handled you a mallet. "I hope you'll like it." she added and she hugged you.

"Can I open it now?" You asked and she smiled

"You can but it will ruin the surprise." She said and you decided to open it later. After few minutes of talk you were back in space for a long travel.

You were sleeping when you enter the atmosphere but the noise of the thunder woke you up. You looked through the window to find a part of the Sokovia in the air. You rubbed your eyes but it was not a dream. When the pods lend in little far from the chaos you took the mallet, when you opened it there was paper note

'Let's become a superhero'

It was wrote in Kryptonian but you recognize Kara's handwritten. You quickly grabbed what looked like your blanket to found a suit. It was a little like Carol's suit but in the chest there was the logo of your House. You smiled and used your super speed to change yourself. When you finished you heard Wanda and Pietro playfuly arguing because your girlfriend ordered him something. It's been long time since you heard her voice; you took few second to stretch before flew to the battlefield.

The Avenger were trying to evacuate civilians and fought the army of robot. Clint spotted a lonely boy and ran to protect him but a clone of Ultron surprised him, the robot was ready to shoot when Pietro ran in front of the Avenger and the child. The archer thought he lost the young speedster before the robot mysteriously exploded. "Oh come i just let onr year and you had the time to gaine power and almost die." you said and the older Maximoff smiled.

You lend in front of him and he hugged you "You're back." he said

"Oh you know how i am, i can't to far from your sister too long." you joked and a group of robot came to you the boys didn't have the time to react; you already used you fresh breath to stop them and you heat vision to exploded them. "You should get him in safety." you commented and the archer seemed to come back in the reality but the silver hair boy was faster (haha) and took the kid in the aircraft carrier.

Clint wanted to talk to you but you were alredy gone. You flew in the air to destroy some robot until you were hit by a red ball, you immediatly flew from where the projectile came from. You were surprise to found her, she seemed to sens your happiness because she turned around to met your gaze "Y/n?" she whispered.

You heard it thanks to your super earing "Hei, fetiță (Hey, baby girl)" you said and she rushed to you and kissed you. "oh i just came back and you're ready for the big game?" you asked playfuly and she punched your arm. You wanted to speak but a wave of robot came, you wanted to use your breath but Wanda just let her power exploded. But the most surprising thing was the fact that her magic seemed to affecte you.

The huge wave seemed to exploded the rest of the army, few second later everyone came to the curch to make sure Wanda was alright. They were to find you, a new face; the Hulk seemed to not like you but he didn't want to attack you until someone cough Natasha cough tell him. "Who are you?" Steve asked, and you just remrked that you were not alone with Wanda anymore.

"I'm Supergirl but you can call me Y/n" you replied and you smiled yourself at the mermory of yor first meeting with Carol. "And you are the Avengers, i know you1." they didn't say anything and just led you to Fury. The man examined you and Clint whispered him something in his ear.

"Supergirl right?" he asked and you nodded. He looked at your suit "My name is Fury, i'm the--"

"Wait Fury like Nicholas Fury?" you cut him off and everybody looked at you confused. "I met Carol Danvers, i mean Captain Marvel. She's very kind, and she told me about you and your adventure against the khree." you said excited.

The witch was happy to see her girlfriend acted like a fangirl but she couldn't help but felt a little jealous. Who is this Carol?

"You met Carol?" Fury asked.

"Yeah I traveled into space to find information and then i found my family and little after i met her" you axplained, you paused and looked at the people around you "Wait" you looked at the twins "did you become avengers when i was gone? Oh come on Wands you prmised we will do this together." you said dramatically and the avenger laughed

"I like her" Thor commented, "and she seem strong" he added

"We'll figurated this later" Maria said, and everybody looked at her "you need to take a shower" she added

"Welcome to the team kids" Natasha said smiling at you and the avenger started to walk out

You turned to Wanda and she already knew "Wand the fucking infamous Black just talk to me. And she smiled at me. Oh God do you see her smile she's beautiful. I like her hair, do you think i should dye my hair like her?" you said and Pietro laughed

"Oh it's rude i though i was your favorite girl" she sokovian replied and even with the humorous tone and her smile you could sens she was jealous

"I like her she's like my favorite Avenger but you know what?" you asked and she shook her head. You took a step froward, you wraped your hands around her waist and focused on her green eyes "I love you Wanda Maximoff, like a lot, a lot, a lot." you siad and kissed her.

"Ew gross, get a room." Pietro said adn you laughed.

After that you took a shower and you spent the night at the hotel, you were talking with the twins about the things you missed since your travel. They told you how they get their power and you told them how you get your suit. Suddenly you smiled and Pietro noticed.

"What's funny E.T." he asked and her sister looked at you

"Oh nothing i'm just happy." you replied

"Why?" Wanda asked. You looked at her and kissed her

"I'm home" you said

[kresnikcest]

JP transcript at the end of the post (hopefully it doesn't get too squished)

(sleep deprived mtl, which is worse than the usual mtl, which is already questionable 😅)

(Context: Victor has taken Elle to the Wedge of the World (Asteria equivalent of Canaan), and distracted Ludger-tachi with a monster. Victor is explaining the equivalent of Origin's counter to Elle, and how the Trial will fail if 1 million Fractured Dimensions are created. Ludger catches up, and says he's relieved to hear humanity hasn't failed the Trial yet.)

Victor: You arrived faster than I thought you would. Just what did you do to get here?

Ludger: My friends helped me. It seems there's a way to enter here for a little while.

Victor: Hm. But your friends aren't here. What do you intend to do, all on your own?

Ludger: I'm not alone. Everyone that you sent to the Prime Dimension will come.

Victor: So in short, you didn't go and help your friends, you only thought about getting yourself here.

Ludger: No! I… I believe in all of them…

Victor: You won't admit it. But it'd be better if you accepted that. I don't blame you. I made the same decision. The decision to abandon friends in pursuit of your goal.

Ludger: I didn't abandon them! I just believe that everyone will make it here safely.

Victor: Perhaps. And what if they don't?

Victor: To make sacrifices in order to accomplish a goal. I didn't want to make those sacrifices, but everyone has priorities. Like you, prioritising chasing after me, instead of regrouping with your friends… I prioritise the life with my daughter, and I killed my former friends for it. Now I intend on destroying the Prime Dimension.

Ludger: So you're saying the lives of others aren't a priority?

Victor: … They're worth less than that of my daughter's.

Ludger: Other people in the world also have family that are important to them, just like you. Don't you feel pain for those sacrifices?

Victor: How many more times will you ask that? It hurts, but if I do it, I can gain a peaceful life with my daughter. If you think that's selfish, then fine. I won't stop, either way.

Elle: Daddy, you liar! You promised Ludger you'd find a way without sacrifices!

Victor: …

Ludger: Victor… I'm asking again, please reconsider.

Victor: … Very well.

Elle: Daddy!

Victor: Show me, here and now. What is your plan to save this world, and the other worlds, without sacrifice?

Ludger: Right… now?

Victor: Yes. Now. Hurry up.

Ludger: I…

Victor: I want to find a different way too. I have tried everything I can. But the time is up. The Waymarkers have all been collected, the path to the Wedge of the World has been summoned. My plan to reconfigure the worlds, to complete Origin's Trial, must happen now. Before someone else takes the right to complete Origin's Trial. I won't miss this opportunity. If you want to stop me, then show me another way.

Ludger: I--!

Elle: Daddy, you're going too fast!

Victor: Then how long should we wait? Think, this isn't something you can put off just by stating it.

Elle: Maybe not, but…

Ludger: …Your plan is wrong. No matter what, I will stop it. But… But… My alternative is…

Victor: … is nothing. I also spent a lot of time failing to find an answer.

Victor: If your only answer is to get in my way, then I'll request that you leave.

[Victor draws his swords]

Ludger: W-Wait… I just want to talk with you!

Victor: No matter how much you talk, it won't be the answer I want. Our time is limited. If you don't wish to fight, then turn back. If you stay, I will assume you intend to interfere.

Elle: Daddy, stop it! What are you doing?

Victor: I won't kill him, Elle.

Elle: Daddy! Please…!

Victor: Elle, please stay back. It's dangerous.

Elle: But…

Ludger: Thank you, Elle. But Victor is right. It's dangerous to get too close.

[Ludger draws his swords]

Elle: Ludger, even you're…

Ludger: If you say you won't talk, then I'll fight you until you do. It's true I can't give you an answer, but I won't give up. That's my decision.

Elle: Ludger… I get it, but… be careful, both of you…

[albertasunrise]

Let the Best Man Win - Part 11

Masterlist

Summary: You’ve known Frankie all your life and have harboured a crush on him for as long as you can remember. Thing is, he doesn’t feel the same. Little do you know, his best friend has a thing for you. What happens when you learn this leads to a messy chain of events that’ll leave more than one person with their heartbroken…

Relationships: Frankie Morales x Reader

Warnings: Angst, mentions of drug abuse, pregnancy mention,

Notes: So I can't decide whether or not to end it here or not... Let me know what you think 😘 sorry this took a while... busy bee

Part 1, Part 2 Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10

Silence reigned over you both a while as the gravity of what you'd just announced hit the both of you. You'd surprised yourself with your statement yet, you had not been that surprised by it either. Frankie looked at you with an expression that was impossible to read and you felt yourself growing nervous as you awaited his response.

"Okay." He said finally with a slight nod of his head and you gave him a bemused look as you processed his reply.

"Okay?" You questioned and he nodded again "That's all you have to say to that?"

"What do you want me to say?" He asked, his tone a little short "I get it. I've fucked up one too many times with you and so I understand why you want this." He stated and you nodded "Lord know I don't want this but I get it."

"So what... that's it? You're just going to roll over?" You questioned, suddenly second-guessing your decision to leave him.

"I won't win no matter what." He replied and your stomach twisted "Best to just do this amicably so that we can maintain some sort of relationship for Ava."

"Okay." You replied, giving him a nod as you stood there awkwardly and shifted from one foot to the other.

"Okay."

"We don't have to do anything now of course." You piped up "The doctor asked if I would be able to care for you as you finished your recovery at home."

"I can stay at Will or Ben's." He retorted "No need to put yourself through any extra stress."

"It's fine." You assured him "You're going to be pretty reliant on others for a bit as you heal. I'm around all the time, makes sense to."

"Okay." He replied plainly and you nodded.

You felt a sudden wave of grief wash over you as the two of you returned to an awkward silence. You knew that you were the one that wanted this and yet his sudden agreement to it had made you wonder if you actually did. In the years you'd known him, he'd brought you a fair amount of grief but now, as you stood there, fiddling with your wedding ring, you started to wonder whether this was the right course of action.

"You don't have to stay." Piped up Frank, pulling you from your thoughts "I'll be fine on my own." He finished. His voice was barely above a whisper as he strained against the soreness from the tube.

"Frank-"

"It's fine."

You nodded and left with a heavy heart. Just because this was what you wanted, didn't mean you had to be happy about it.

~

Three days later you were helping a sore Frankie get into the car. Ava, sleeping soundly in the back seat, undisturbed by her father's pained grunts and groans as he attempted to get himself comfortable. Frankie had a long road ahead of him and you were nervous about how things would be now after what you'd told him a few days earlier. He'd barely looked at you since you arrived.

Ben and Will had pleaded with you to reconsider your decision in the days that had followed but after thinking about it a few days, you'd decided that it was for the best. You had to put yourself first this time.

You couldn't trust him anymore.

Despite all that though, you still loved and cared for him so for now, you knew you needed to swallow your frustrations and help him get better.

Once he was in the car, you jumped into the driver's seat and pulled away from the hospital, not a word being uttered as you drove. He kept his eyes fixed on his window and you felt that familiar gut-twisting guilt start to kick in again. The two of you hadn't spoken about the divorce since that day but you knew that he'd have likely heard from the boys that you weren't going to change your mind. You had to do what was right for your family and getting a divorce was just that. Or so you thought at least.

When you pulled up to the house, you were quick to sprint to his side, helping him out of the car before he grumbled his thanks "I can take it from here."

"Frank-"

"Get the baby." He snapped and you backed off, watching him limp into the house and out of sight.

Ava was still asleep as you scooped her into your arms. Grabbing her bag, you made your way inside where you found Frankie gingerly lowering himself to the couch.

You placed Ava in her rocker before unpacking her bag in the kitchen, silently seething at Frank's attitude towards you. You knew he was upset but there was no reason for him to be so cold towards you. You just wanted to help.

The rest of the evening carried on much the same. Frankie slept a lot, his painkillers making him tired and you went about doing your daily chores. He ate little of the meal you made before, begrudgingly, allowing you to help him to the bedroom where after awkwardly helping him change, you left him alone.

You'd set yourself up in the spare room after convincing Ben to help you move Ava's cot into there and you had moved your clothes over also. So when you'd gone to sleep that night, staring up at the ceiling as you listened to Ava's soft breathing, you allowed yourself to miss his warm presence beside you. It felt strange to know that there was merely a wall separating the two of you. You'd gone weeks missing him and now he was home and yet you were still alone.

So you allowed yourself to cry quietly and morn your broken marriage. Things were never going to be the same.

~

The days passed by painfully. Frankie had spoken to you a little more but it was still clipped and cold. The only times he came out of his bitter shell was when he had Ava in his arms. He doted on her and it made your heart ache for the times that were. Before all of this had happened. He spent most of his day either sleeping or watching tv with her as he tried to explain what was happening as you got on with your day.

He had noted how tired you looked as he watched you from afar, and he hated how bitter he felt towards you. He did understand why you wanted the divorce, but there was a part of him that just wished you would fight to save what you both had together. Wished you wouldn't throw away your vows like they were nothing.

Little did he know that you were crying yourself to sleep every night. His callous attitude had led you to feel like he'd fallen out of love with you and that hurt more than his acceptance of the divorce. You wanted him to tell you you were making a mistake. That you could fix this.

You wanted him to give you a reason to fight.

One evening, sitting on the couch in silence, the two of you watched the TV as Ava napped in Frankie's arms. He couldn't stop watching her as she twitched in his arms, a grin painting on his face.

"You ever wonder what she dreams about?" He asks out of the blue, the casualness taking you by surprise.

"All the time." You replied after a few moments "My theory is food and her favourite bear." You chuckled and he looked at you and smiled.

"I think you're probably right." He replied as he watched her dummy shifting as she sucked on it "Definitely what she's dreaming about right now."

You both sat there and watched her for a short while.

This was the first time, in what felt like an eternity, that Frankie had been anything but cold towards you and you were desperate to cling to it.

"You ever wonder what Luke would have been like?" He asked again after a short while and your heart sunk a little as you thought of him "Can't believe he'd be almost nine now."

"I wonder it all the time." You confessed "I imagine a carbon copy of you. Right down to your pouty bottom lip." You continued as you let out a breathy chuckle "Maybe my nose though."

"Lord I hope so." Frankie chortled and you grinned at him "I imagine him being more like you. Maybe my hair and eyes."

"Well, she's your mini-me." You pointed out as you stroked the apple of Ava's cheek with your fingertip "Got my appetite though."

"No arguments there." He snorted and you gave him a look of faux shock before the two of you shared a loving gaze.

It was over almost as soon as it started as Frankie let out an audible sigh, his shoulders slumping as he returned his attention to the infant in his arms.

"How did we get here?" He asked, his voice cracking as he tried to hold back the tears that stung his eyes.

"You know how Frank." You replied softly.

"Yeah, I know. I fucked up, but I don't understand how you could give up on us so easily." He continued and you felt a flash of anger surge through you.

"Fuck you. I have done nothing but fight for us." You sobbed "I have supported you through so much, despite the pain it inflicted on me."

"That was years ago." He argued and you scoffed

"So you didn't snort coke and lose your pilot licence within the last year?"

"You can't still be holding that against me?" He snapped "It was a mistake and we got past it."

"Yes but you still put me through emotional hell Frank." You choked "You have inflicted so much pain on me and yet despite all of that, I still love you."

"Just not anymore." He grumbled and you let out a loud growl as you stood.

"Shit Francisco, of course, I still love you now." You snapped "I can't just fall out of love with you." You finalised as your tears fell freely.

Ava started to stir and Frankie awkwardly pushed himself to his feet, leaving without a word to put her down but you knew this conversation wasn't over.

He was back a few moments later with a baby monitor in hand and the two of you shared a tense stare before he finally spoke.

"If you still love me then why are you so willing to just give up on us?" He asked and you wept.

"Because I can't trust you." You sobbed "I don't want to give up on us, Francisco. I want us to grow old together. Maybe have another baby but now... Now I just can't see any of that."

"Why not?"

"Because you've lied to me one too many times now." You paused to take a stuttering breath before you continued "You promised me you wouldn't do anything stupid ever again, then you fly to South America and almost die. That's the fucking definition of stupid."

"We didn't know that's what we were signing up for." He protested and you scoffed.

"No, but you agreed to it after the fact." You paused, his expression changing "I know everything, Frank. Ben and Will told me exactly what happened. That Pope offered you an out but you didn't take it." You paused as a single tear slipped down your flushed cheek "Why didn't you take it?"

"Because I thought I was going to be able to give you both a better life." He yelled and you flinched "I wanted to be able to give you both everything. Give you the life you deserve but it blew up in my face."

"No shit."

"If I could go back and choose differently I would." He sobbed "If I had known what that trip would lead to, I would never have agreed but I can't change the past and I hate that..." He let out a stuttered breath as his eyes locked with yours "I hate how I ruined everything."

"I can't do this." You sobbed, needing to be anywhere but where you were "I can't-"

You practically sprinted from the room as fat tears streamed down your cheeks. You locked yourself in the bathroom as you allowed everything to pour out of you and Frankie could do nothing but stand there and listen as you cried. Heart shattering into a million pieces

He wanted to hold you. He wanted to tell you that it was going to be okay but he knew that he'd lost that right and in truth, he didn't know whether it was going to be okay. He'd lost all hope that it might be.

...

You didn't see each other again that evening. You fed and changed Ava before going to bed where, once again, you lay there and listened to your baby's soft breathing. You felt numb as the conversation the two of you had shared that evening played on repeat in your mind. You'd known that it had been inevitable but that hadn't made the discussion any easier. It hadn't made it hurt any less.

You weren't sure how long you'd been lying there when you heard it. Whimpering and not from Ava. You sat there for a while, noting it was gone midnight, and you listened to the moans and groans before finally, they turned to pained screams.

You were out of bed in a flash, sprinting to the room you used to share to find Frankie thrashing beneath the sheets, his skin covered in a thin sheen of sweat. Tears leaked from the corners of his eyes as his cries grew louder and louder.

'Frank?" You called out as you stepped gingerly towards the bed, heart breaking at the sight before you "Frankie." You called out again, gently shaking his shoulder.

"PLEASE." He screamed, his back arching off the bed and you started to panic "PLEASE, DON'T TAKE THEM FROM ME." He sobbed and you froze.

"Frankie, you need to wake up." You urged as you shook him a little harder but still, he didn't wake up.

His screams became blood-curling and finally, Ava woke up screaming. You knew there was no way to settle her if he was like this so you continued to try and wake him.

"Come on, Frankie, please." You begged, sobbing as you watched him suffer and then Ava screamed, he woke.

"My baby." He sobbed, shoving you away before sprinting to your room and you knew he wasn't fully awake.

Your heart started to race as you got up from the floor, wincing when you stood before limping as fast as you could, only to be greeted by a sobbing Frankie. He was cradling his daughter in his arms as he rocked on his knees, eyes wild and glossy.

"Frankie?" You called out as you stepped into your room, turning on the lamp so you didn't startle him.

"Don't take her from me." He sobbed and your heart broke "Please don't take her from me."

"Frankie, it's me." You said softly, desperately trying to pull him from his waking nightmare.

Finally, he looked at you. His posture softened as recognition started to trickle in and then the tears returned. He shook with each sob and you gingerly lowered yourself to the floor, wincing as you settled.

"What's wrong?" He asked as concern filled eyes and panic saturated his tone.

"You shoved me off the bed and I landed on my hip." You replied, immediately regretting it as he grew hysterical again "No, no, it's okay Frank, it was an accident."

"I hurt you," He sobbed, looking down at Ava who was staring up at him with wide wet eyes, bottom lip wobbling "Take her before I hurt her too."

"You won't hurt her Frank." You assured him as you cupped his cheek and wiped away a tear with your thumb "You had a nightmare. Ava woke you and you panicked. It was an accident okay?" He nodded weakly and you gave him a small smile "You're safe okay?"

"Okay." He replied, his voice so quiet you almost missed in.

"Do you want to stay with me?" You asked as you pressed your forehead against his.

"Yes." He sobbed and you nodded before getting to your feet.

You took Ava from him and put her back down in her crib, smiling as she settled and her eyes fluttered shut. You then took Frankie's hand and pulled him into a hug and your heart ached when you felt him tremble in your arms.

"I'm sorry." He whimpered as he buried his face in your neck "I'm so sorry."

"You don't need to be sorry, Frank." You said as you placed a soft kiss on his temple "Come to bed."

He followed as you led him there, crawling under the duvet before holding it up so he could join you. He seemed shy and you gave him a reassuring nod before he finally climbed in next to you. You gave him a small smile before rolling onto your side, the smile growing wider when he followed suit and pulled you flush against him.

"I love you." He whispered and your heart raced.

"I love you too Francisco." You replied, chuckling when he squeezed you harder before burying his face into your hair.

You stayed like that all night, only waking when Ava grew fussy but Frankie's hand on your hip stopped you.

"Let me get her." He said before placing a soft kiss on your neck and rolling out of bed.

You pushed yourself into a sitting position, smiling as he placed her in your waiting arms before sitting down beside you. Ava eagerly latching on, eyes wide and vocal as she ate.

"She's such a chatty eater." He chuckled as he rested his head on your shoulder to watch his daughter "What you kicking baby girl?"

You chuckled at his question, turning your head to look at him and he lifted his to return your gaze. Nothing else felt more right than that moment. Everything seemed to fade into the background as you both gazed at each other, the world falling away around your little family.

He didn't even think about it when he pressed his lips to yours in a soft, unhurried, kiss that stole the air from your lungs. It was perfect and you felt your heart swell in your chest as you pulled your head back to look at him.

"I know you've given me more chances than I deserve." He started, resting his forehead against yours "But you and Ava are my life and I can't just give up on us."

"Frankie-"

"Please let me finish." He pleaded and you nodded "I want to grow old with you. I want to put another baby in you. I want to spend my life with you and I can't promise you that I won't lie again... But I can promise that I will never do anything stupid that will risk us or hurt you ever again."

"I don't know Frank. We're a mess." You sobbed and he kissed you again.

"We are but this... what we have... it's worth fighting for and baby, I am going to fight for us." He urged and you whimpered as he kissed you again.

Ava screeched and you both jumped back, smirking at the displeased look on her face from the lack of attention she'd received.

"Sorry baby girl." You cooed as you sat her up to burp her, nodding your thanks when Frankie pulled your top back up for you.

"Let me change her and then we'll talk about this over breakfast." You said as you got up from the bed and carried her to the bathroom.

Frankie made his way back to his room, closing the door, he grabbed his phone and called Ben as he watched the doorway closely.

"Sup Fish?" Ben said as he answered and Frankie smirked "Everything okay?"

"Bug and I kissed."

"SERIOUSLY?" Ben yelled and Frankie flinched "How did this happen?"

"Well, I had a nightmare last night. Was pretty bad... Came to clutching Ava on the floor."

"Shit, you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." He replied "Anyway she let me stay with her last night and then when we woke up this morning we were just there, together, in bed as she fed Ava. One thing led to another and..."

"Does this mean you two are going to get back together?" Ben asked excitedly and Frankie shrugged.

"I don't know." He confessed "I hope so. We're going to talk more this morning but-"

"Go talk to her Fish." Ben ordered, "Go talk to her... Win your girl back."

"What do I do? I need to prove to her that I won't fuck this up again." He said, pausing a moment when he heard the toilet flush "She doesn't trust me Ben but shit... there is no way I will ever be that stupid ever again."

"All you can do is tell her that Fish." Ben said softly "Despite everything, she loves you man and I know the two of you are destined for each other."

Frank hushed Ben as he heard the door to the bathroom open and close so he listened out for the sound of your footsteps down the hall before pushing Ben to finish.

"Look. We've been through a lot in the last eight odd years and despite everything, the two of you always ended up back in each other's orbit... So you need to go out there, kiss her and prove to her that this is it. No more mistakes this time."

"When the fuck did you get so wise?" Frankie snorted and Ben chuckled.

"Goodbye Fishsticks."

Frankie hung up and made his way to the kitchen, where he found you preparing coffee whilst Ava jumped danced in her rocker to the tune on the radio. You smiled as you handed him a mug and hummed when he placed a loving kiss on your lips.

"I've had an idea." Frankie piped up and your brows knitted together in confusion.

"Yeah?" You asked and he nodded.

Placing his and your mugs on the side, he took your hands in his and got down on one knee. Smiling at your obvious confusion.

"I have made a lot of mistakes in my life but if there is one thing I got right, it was you." He started and you smiled at him "I know I hurt you and I will never be able to take that back but I want to spend the rest of my days making it up to you." He continued, your name falling from his lips "Will you marry me?"

"Frank, we're already married." You chuckled.

"Okay... Will you marry me again?" He asked and your face softened.

"We don't need to do this." He said and his face fell.

"Right." He replied, his stomach twisting as he got up from the floor and prayed for the ground to swallow him up.

"It's not that I don't want to Frankie." You said, noting how disheartened he looked "I want us to work on things but we don't need to renew our vows to do that. Besides, we have another reason to work on things."

"We do?" He asked and you nodded, smiling at him as you took his hand and placed it over your belly.

His eyes widened as he looked from his hand to your face, tears prickling his eyes. "You're...?"

You nodded and he sobbed "How long have you known?" He asked suddenly as his eyes flew open.

"About fifteen minutes." You confessed and his head shot back "I realised this morning that I was late. We had some tests left over from Ava so I took one whilst you were in your room and well..."

You handed him the two Blue tests you'd taken, both saying PREGNANT on their small screen. He stared at them a moment before looking at you again, a smile filling his face as he pulled you into a bruising kiss.

"We're going to have another baby." He sobbed against your lips and you giggled.

"Yeah." You breathed "The first time we fuck since Ava and you get me pregnant. Strong swimmers Morales."

"Shit..." He trailed off as he dropped to his knees and placed a soft kiss on your stomach.

"You happy?" You asked as you looked down at him, grinning when he nodded vigorously.

"Fucking ecstatic."

"So how are we gonna tell the boys?"

~

"So you two are good?" Asked Will as he sipped his beer and smiled at how happy the two of you looked.

The four of you had met for a drink at your usual watering hole after you'd managed to secure a sitter for Ava. The two of you had gone for your scan that day and had known instantly how you wanted to tell the brothers. So here you sat, buzzing with excitement as they continued to question you both.

"Yeah." You replied with a nod "We are... We have some stuff to work through but we want to do the work."

"We're so happy for you both." Benny pipped up "Let's get another round, this is cause for celebration."

"Before you do that." Frankie said, "There's something else."

"Yeah?" Will asked and you both nodded in unison, handing them both an envelope.

"What's this?" Ben questioned, and you just grinned.

"Open it." You replied, "At the same time though."

The brothers shared a look before opening their envelopes and pulling the contents out in unison, both of you smirking as their eyes grew to the size of saucers before their heads flicked up.

"Are you serious?" Ben shrieked and you both nodded "How?"

"Well, the night before you all left. Frank, fucked me for the first time since we had Ava and well..." You trailed off and both Miller brothers chuckled.

"Maybe a little too much info but shit!" Ben chuckled "This is awesome. Congratulations."

"So that means you're what..."

"3 months along." You answered.

"And you're both happy?" Will asked and you shared a look with the man beside you, smiling at him sweetly before looking at the older Miller.

"Yeah, we are." You replied with a nod "They're exactly what we needed."

"You know... Ben's a great name." The younger Miller joked and the four of you erupted into fits of laughter.

For the first time in a while. All was well again.

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[zabrak-show]

In the novel Clone Wars: Stories of the Light and Dark Obi-Wan's chapter retells the episode "The Lawless". While overall I found the book, while certainly not bad, missing a certain something and although some chapters really add to the corresponding episodes such as Rex' retelling of the Umbara arc, many are just very close retellings of the episodes. Now Kenobi's chapter was a mixed bag to me because some of it is really just an exact recount of the events of the episode, however, I found some additions made in regards to Maul interesting.

To no one's surprise there's a bit about Obi-Wan's almost hatred: "Hate was not the Jedi way. But for this man, Obi-Wan had grown weary of keeping it at bay."

Then we get confirmation that Maul is either just very perceptive, simply has Kenobi all figured out or is actually able to mindprobe even such thoroughly trained - albeit here clearly distraught - Jedi as Obi-Wan: "Maul seemed to sense his thoughts."

And of course we have Obi-Wan's reaction to Satine's death - which tbh made me all the more convinced that even though Obi-Wan might have crushed on her as a padawan, he is more fond of than in love sith her at this point -: "When Maul killed Qui-Gon Jinn, Obi-Wan was stricken with sorrow. Sorrow gripped him again. But there was something else, as well. Something dangerous. Something that scorched. Satine wasn't Maul's enemy. She was just a tool Maul had used to get something he wanted, the throne of Mandalore. And a tool to hurt Obi-Wan. Using a person that way was the worst form of cruelty. Satine had been a person, and her death wasn't just a loss for Obi-Wan. It was a loss for so many more. She'd been a child on this world. Like other children, she'd taken her first step, uttered her first word, laughed and chased flitters in the tall grass of the Mandalorian plains. She'd learned to read, made friends, suffered hurts, recovered and laughed again. And she'd become a leader. She should have lived to see her world thrive, to see her people find peace, to prosper, to make music and art. She should have grown old and been able to look back on all she'd achieved.

"But in a split second, Maul had ended all that. He'd extinguished a light in the universe and replaced it with shadow. Such an act was truly the definition of the dark side. And Obi-Wan burned with rage.

"With the rage came a vision: Eyes smoldering with hatred. Screams in the red glare of a lightsaber.

"Obi-Wan would cleave Maul in two. He would do much worse. There would be nothing left of him. Or the Dathomirian. Or the commandos, those Mandalorian traitors. He would kill them Almec. He would kill anyone who'd had a hand in overthrowing Satine, anyone who'd contributed to her death.

"And he would kill anyone who tried to stop him. Anyone who stood in his way, by word or by deed.

"Anyone.

"Maul laughed. "And now we see the true Obi-Wan Kenobi. The one he hides behind a mask of wit and charm. The one who yearns to be set free."

"And if Obi-Wan gave in to his desires, he'd be giving Maul exactly what he wanted."

So overall this just aligns with the episode. Although I do think Maul's additional taunt in this is so in character for him (and it'd be hilarious if it weren't for the entirety of the situation that Maul describes Obi-Wan as witty and charming). Although it's interesting just how close Obi-Wan came to falling. And ofc this passage really just hammers home the point that Maul wanted for Obi-Wan to fall to the dark side rather than wanting to kill him.

Anyways. The passage I've been dying to point out as an avid Obimaul shipper is the following:

"You can kill me, but you will never destroy me," Obi-Wan said, trying to keep his anger under control. "It takes strength to resist the dark side. Only the weak embrace it."

"It is more powerful than you know."

"And those who oppose it are more powerful than you'll ever be."

There was still a chance to turn this right. He could not overpower Maul, but maybe he could reach him. Maybe he could match Maul's fury, not with equal fury but with understanding. With sympathy. Maul had not always been this way. He'd had his future stolen from him. He'd been warped by the Force-wielders of Dathomir. He'd been groomed to become a creature of anger and vengeance who stood before Obi-Wan.

"I know where you're from," said Obi-Wan. "I've been to your village. I know the decision to join the dark side wasn't yours. I know the Nightsisters made it for you."

Obi-Wan cringed. The words had not come out as he'd intended. He'd wanted to extend a kindness that Maul perhaps never experienced. But he let his own anger and his own fear infect his words with venom."

And then the scene moves along as seen in the episode.

But phew. I feel like there is so much to unpack here. Obi-Wan trying to reach out for Maul is soooo good. I love that meeting anger with understanding and kindness is the Obimaul trope and this is pretty much that. It's interesting that Obi-Wan aknowledges that he couldn't strike the right tone.

Honestly all of this makes me yearn for the AU where he does reach Maul and maybe I'll even write it myself. Just Maul giving in and opening himself up to said kindness (although the staging might have to be different for that e.g. Maul visiting Obi-Wan in prison as an additional scene before he kills Satine).

This also made me reconsider the Siege of Mandalore. We all know, that Maul at that point of the story is not out to kill Kenobi. And honestly, considering that Maul is hyperaware of Kenobi's emotions in these scene and could possibly also have felt Obi-Wan's "kill 'em sith kindness" impulse, isn't it even more likely, that Maul wanted Kenobi to join him in robbing Sheev of his priced pupil Anakin but also killing Palpatine? I always thought Maul wanted to reveal Sidious to Kenobi and he only adapts his plan because it isn't Obi-Wan that arrives. But with this scene in mind, couldn't it possibly be, that Maul remembered that Obi-Wan once tried to reach out for him and wanted to extend the same gesture with the goal of overthrowing Palpatine? Whilst there is this short moment in "The Son of Dathomir" comic in which Maul and Dooku unite in fighting Kenobi, I feel like after Talzin was also killed by Palpatine Maul was kind of aimless - because in the comic he (unfortunately) has essentially moved from seeing himself as Sidious' tool to being Mother Talzin's tool (he even states the latter directly) - and nothing matters to him as much as overthrowing Sidious in that final arc, because he knows if not now then never. He has foreseen what Sidious and Vader will become and knows this is his last shot to truly hurt Palpatine in any way. And lastly Maul is certainly not that delusional that he'd think he can kill Kenobi and Skywalker alone (which is an interpretation I've seen and honestly just feels wrong at that point)

Essentially I am convinced that Maul wanted to form a sort of alliance with Obi-Wan to overthrow Sidious (The enemy of my enemy is my friend and all that). Maul knows that Obi-Wan knows him better than anyone and I think at the very least he hoped he could convince Obi-Wan of the truth. Additionally Obi-Wan is the only being left in his life Maul has a connection to, who hasn't been killed by Sidious.

All I am saying is that I join the ranks of other anons and blogs as a huge Obimaul enabler.

Wow!! This was so informative and awesome. I don't have that book so I appreciate the run down A LOT! And will probably save this as reference point tbh.

I don't really have anything to add other than thank you for sharing with me, and that I think you absolutely should write an AU where Obi-Wan is able to reach Maul. How that would play out and what happens when they do is a delicious thought.

[hollanderfangirl]

Let me go |Harry Holland|

Pairing: Harry Holland x Therapist! Reader

A/N: so I'm not a therapist and I've never been to therapy, well if you don't consider the sessions with my psychology teacher. All of what I've written comes from what I've learnt in psychology class, reading books and listening to other people's experiences.

Warnings: talk about death, panic attack and it's just really sad

Word count: 3.3k, this is my longest fic yet :)

(Sorry for the shitty moodboard I just had to post this fic or I would have lost my mind)

Harry Holland walked through the halls of the clinic, not really sure why he was here. Well he knew why he had come to see a therapist but he wondered how he put himself in this situation. He had been locking himself inside a glass cave built out of hopelessness for months, his friends and family were greatly concerned about him but he refused to take any help. He had always been stubborn, he never asked for anybody's help. He hated the look of pity on people's faces. He hated people showing him sympathy. He was more than this. He didn't need anybody. He can pull himself together, he just needed time.

But it wasn't helping. Burying your feelings in has never helped anybody. Putting on a smile everyday in front of people and crying himself to sleep, Harry found it more and more difficult. His mum had sensed it and told him to go and see a doctor. He had resisted it at first. 

"Please do it for me, Harry. I cannot see you like this, at least for my satisfaction," Nikki had said. "Just go for a trial session and if you like it then you can continue," but of course he wasn't going to continue. 

Now as he stood in front of the receptionist, he was reconsidering his decision. 

"Yes, do you have an appointment, sir?" 

"Huh?" he seemed lost. "Yeah..yeah" 

"Just wait here, I'll inform Dr Y/l/n" 

"Your know what, cancel the appointment. I- I don't need help" 

"Oh but this is just a trial, Mr Holland" 

"Yeah but I don't-" the receptionist was already at the door, muttering something to the woman inside. 

You step outside to see a curly headed man, he looked pleasant but his eyes looked sad. Those were the eyes of a person who had seen immense grief, someone who had been miserable for a long long time. 

"I'm sorry but I don't need therapy… I didn't realise this before, I -I shouldn't have come here" 

"Oh Mr Holland, this is just a trial right? Let's just have some coffee. This isn't therapy yet" you smile at him. 

"No I really-" 

"Okay then, give me half an hour. If you still feel the same way, then you can leave. Half an hour is all I want from you, Mr Holland" 

"Alright" 

You lead him into your chamber, closing the door behind you. He sits down on a couch across from you, your desk separating you both. The first step of therapy- resistance. People always resist therapy at first, they feel like they don't need the help or maybe seeking help makes them weak. They don't feel like opening up to a complete stranger. How can they? How can they open up their most vulnerable state to a person who they barely know? But slowly and steadily, a rapport is made. A therapist has to be very careful and empathetic. They have to be trusting. Someone who people can turn to. Someone who they can relate to. Someone who understands them. Someone who would just listen. 

"So, your mother sent you here. Right, Mr Holland?" 

"Just- just call me Harry" 

"Okay then Harry, tell me" 

"What do you want me to tell you?" 

"Everything. Start from the beginning" 

"Well I- do you… do you really think I would-" he hesitates. "Who do you think you are? Why do you think I should pay you to listen to my goddamn life story here?" 

"You're not here to tell me your life story," you say politely. "I'm here to help you and I can do that only if you would let me" 

"Well guess what? You cannot help me, I knew I was wasting my time," he gets up and starts to walk away. 

"I asked for half an hour of your time, Harry" 

"Well I don't fucking care" 

"Harry, please listen to me. All I ask is half an hour" 

Little did he know, this half an hour was going to change his life. 

Something about your tone made him stay. He sat back down on the couch, turning away from you. 

"Okay, so if you're not going to talk, I will," you sigh. "So, you have suffered a great loss, someone you loved dearly?" 

"Yes," he still didn't look you in the eye. 

"Who was it?" 

"My…my friend. Girlfriend" 

"And when did this happen?" 

"A year ago" 

"How have you been holding up?" 

He thought of giving another vague answer. How the fuck do you think I'm holding up? I'm fucking dying every single day. 

"Uh- it's been a little better, I guess. It's not as bad as it used to be" 

"Well that's a start. And do you still think about her?" 

Every goddamn minute, lady. What do you want from me? "Yeah sometimes" 

"And how have you been sleeping?" 

I can't sleep. I haven't slept properly for months. If I sleep I see her coming back to me. "Alright I guess" 

This wasn't going anywhere. You thought of recommending him another doctor but something about him charmed you. He was a man who should have been living a great life but his grief was tearing him apart. You had to help him. You felt a strong connection to him, you felt determined. No, I have to help him. I just have to.

"Harry, do you feel like you're responsible for your girlfriend's death?" it was a straightforward question, you had been trying to get something out of him but he wasn't ready to. 

He looked at you dead in the eye, yet could not get any words out. You could sense the anger building up inside him but it wasn't projected at you, he was angry with himself. 

"I….. " he took a few deep breaths, clenching his hands into fists. "Yes" 

"Why is that so?" 

"Fucking hell! Are you for real? She died, okay? And I wasn't there… I wasn't there.. " he was tearing up. "I should have been the one to die! Not her! Not anybody! Everyone just leaves me in the end!" he was full on shouting, letting out everything he had been holding inside himself for a whole year. He had tears in his eyes.

You handed him a box of tissues and he was gasping for breath. When he had calmed down, you both sat in silence for a few minutes. 

"You know, Harry, my friend died the day we had a fight. She was my best friend. I knew her ever since we were three. It was a silly argument. We should not have fought about it. But we did and I told her I wished she would just go away… and then she did" it was painful for you to remember this, but time does heal everything. 

"I'm sorry," his voice was low. "And I'm sorry for all those things I said" 

"No it's alright, that's what you're here for. And besides, it's nothing compared to your loss, Harry" 

"No. It- it's not a competition. Suffering is not a competition. It must've been really hard for you, Dr y/l/n," this was the first time he had addressed you. 

"Call me y/n," you smile at him. "And yeah that's very true. We often blame ourselves, you know, it's very common. We cannot be angry at them so we get angry with ourselves. Even though we know deep in our hearts that there was nothing we could have done" 

There was a long silence. 

"She went out for a drive, that bastard drunk driver," he spoke up. "And I was just resting. She asked me so many times to join her but I wanted to sleep" 

You nod at him and he continued. "That's…the reason I'm not able to sleep. Every night I close my eyes, I think I'll wake up to that phone call" 

"Well yes I don't blame you, our brains sometimes don't process things that come as a shock. And then it just keeps on haunting us forever. Do you believe in life after death, Harry?" 

"Well I don't know what to believe" 

"Have you- felt her? After she was gone?" 

"You'll think I'm crazy" 

"I'm a therapist, it'll take you much more than that to convince me you're crazy" 

"I sometimes talk to her. Like what would she think about this particular situation. Or just that I miss her so much. I don't get any responses but I just try to think like her?" 

"Yeah, that's quite normal actually. People think they need to 'get over' someone's death. But that's not true. You can never really get over something like death" 

"And what does getting over even mean? Like you just forget them? Moving on with your life just means that you think they were never a part of it" 

"Well you're both right and wrong. Yes we must remember our loved ones who are not with us anymore but at the same time, we have to let them go" 

"How? It's too painful" 

"I know. But do you believe in the concept of souls, Harry?" 

"Yeah I mean," he shrugs. 

"The soul is considered to be immortal. And groups of souls tend to travel together. Even if you don't know it, some way, somehow, they're always with us" 

He says nothing but his eyes looked softer now. 

"And just think about it, think of her seeing you like this. Do you think she could have handled you being so miserable?" 

"She would have been heartbroken" 

"Exactly. So do it for her, for yourself. For both of you to feel peace again" 

"Yeah" 

You look at your watch. Half an hour was up. 

"So, Harry. Your half an hour is up. Is there anything else?" 

"Yes, um we can talk about it in our next session?" 

You smile at him. "Of course" 

                          ----------------

After that one half an hour session, Harry was a changed man. He was still mourning, he was still miserable but he had hope. For the first time in a long time, he thought he could actually go on with his life, he could finally feel peace.

The week went by smoothly. Harry tried to make himself busy, by surrounding himself with people and always working. He was still getting nightmares but he was determined to sleep. He was sleeping light, afraid of what deep sleep might show him.

Meanwhile your life was exactly the same, you went on with your day treating people, talking, helping them. You loved your job, you loved the sense of satisfaction you got after patients they told you they were finally better. Every person was a challenge, and you knew there was a gem hidden inside every one of them. All of them had immense potential but life hadn't been kind to them. You felt disturbed and it broke your heart to see people hurting. And you would do anything to make it better for them. To help them.

You couldn’t keep Harry out of your mind. You were thinking about him all day long, awaiting your next session with him. What if he cancels? What can I do if he does? Why am I thinking about him? He had this air around him, a magnetic pull, which was pulling your closer and closer towards him. And why is he so damn attractive? No I should not think about him that way. It was the first and foremost rule of your profession. Never get emotionally attached with your clients. It was a professional relationship and must remain that way.

When he came into your office the following week, you could sense the change in him. You felt proud that a single session made such a difference. There was no arrogance in him, he didn’t seem angry anymore. He was calm and better.

“So, Harry. How was your week?”

“It was good, I’ve been shooting my new short film and it’s coming out to be okay so far”

“Alright and how have you been sleeping?”

“Not that good to be honest. I still get dreams, uh bad dreams”

“What do you see in these dreams?”

“I see the accident scene….again and again, it’s the same dream. Sometimes I see her, she talks to me and all that”

“Hmm and have you talked to your family? Your friends?”

“Yeah I talked to my mum…and my brother”

“What did they say?”

“They said they are here for me and will always love me”

“Yes and I don’t doubt that, Harry. You have a lot of people in your life who love and support you. Embrace that”

The session went by smoothly, he opened up to you about his life, everything about the girl he loved so much. About his family, his career. You found yourself staring at him, taking glances at his hands which he constantly moved while he talked. You noticed he was shaking his leg the whole time. Stop staring, y/n.

Wow she’s so beautiful. And thoughtful. And funny and understanding. What am I doing? She’s my therapist….but…why couldn’t I have met her before? Why didn’t I meet her when I was normal? Would things have been different? But then again, I would have never met her if I was normal.

Things seemed to get better, as the weeks progressed, Harry was becoming more and more like his old self again. But there was a feeling of regret, he thought this was wrong as if he were forgetting her. But you were there to guide him, to tell him that this is what life is. It never stops. No matter what happens, you will heal. Someday, sometime. And each day we progress towards it.

And then it happened. The call came at 1 am in the morning. You were sleeping and you were tired, you had been working all day and just needed some rest. You wouldn't have picked the call up but something told you it was important. That you should pick it up.

“Hello?” you yawn.

You just hear muffled breathing for a few seconds.

“Hello? Who is it?”

“It…it’s me…Harry”

“Harry, what’s wrong?” you thought what could have happened at this time of the night.

“I just- can you-” he sounded like he was choking.

“Harry what’s wrong, you’re scaring me”

“I… can’t… breathe,” you hear him sobbing. ”I had… that… dream, I feel like I’m…going to…die”

“Harry, listen to me. You will be okay. Yeah? Just take deep breaths and sit tight. I’m coming to you”

You search through his file to look for his address. When you find it, you rush through the front door and drive to his house. You were on the phone with him the whole drive.

“Just keep breathing, Harry. Deep breaths, okay?”

To your surprise, the front door was unlocked. It looked like he had gone out into the street in the middle of the night. You search through rooms to find him, and you see him curled into a ball at the corner of a king size bed. You touch his shoulder and he flinches.

“Hey, hey it’s just me. It’s alright”

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t know who else to call,” he was crying, with the tears streaming down his cheeks, his eyes looked small and they looked red from the lack of sleep and of tears.

“It’s alright, Harry. Just come here, it’ll be alright,” you pull him towards yourself him and he buries his face into your chest and you held him, stroking his hair and telling him it will be alright.

“That’s it. Let it out, Harry. It’s okay to cry”

You both stayed like that for another 15 minutes. He couldn’t stop crying and you knew he needed that. He had been holding everything in for so long and it just came out like an explosion tonight. You wiped his tears and made him meditate for a few minutes.

He fell asleep and you stayed up all night, looking at him. He looked so innocent while he slept, and cute too, you thought hiding a blush, even though nobody was there to look at you.

That night, Harry finally felt at peace. He was finally able to sleep. He had no nightmares, just a peaceful dream. He saw his girlfriend, running away from him in a white dress with her hair flowing in the wind.

Please don’t leave me, darling. I love you.

I know you do Harry, but you must let me go. I will always be with you. I will always love you. It is time you start caring about yourself, you must let me go. It is time.

No! don’t leave me!

And he woke up. Something about this dream told him that she was right. It was time. He was finally ready to let her go. For both of their sakes.

He went down to find you sleeping on the couch. He was hesitant at his thoughts but deep down he knew he was falling for you. Am I just using her to cope with my loss? Or do I really love her?

You opened your eyes, looking at Harry sitting on the ground, pushing a strand of hair away from your face.

“Good morning, how did you sleep?”

“Better. Really really better. I- I don’t know how to thank you, y/n and I’m so sorry”

“Hey it’s alright, and I’m glad I could help,” you smile. “I should go now, I have to get to work”

“Let me make breakfast and let me drive you to your house”

“Oh no it’s okay I can-”

“I owe this much to you, y/n. Let me”

“Okay”

                              -----------------

It wasn’t until another week when Harry had his next session. You had been thinking about him all the time, you were confused, it wasn’t supposed to go this way. But he….who am I kidding I’m in love with him.

When he walked through the door on a Thursday morning next week, he looked healthy and happier than ever. You felt a sense of happiness yourself, therapy is always beneficial to both the patient and the therapist. Every person is a deep universe, their thoughts, experiences, pain, joy, everything. Empathising with clients is a great learning experience, it becomes a part your personality. It becomes a part of you.

“Hey y/n”

“Hi Harry”

“So my week as been as it’s always and I’ve been feeling a lot better ever since that day…and that dream” he had told you about the dream he had the night you watched him sleep. He seemed to completely change after that, he let go of the intense emotions he had been carrying around.

“That’s very good and you’ve made a lot of progress since our first meeting”

“Yeah…I have”

The session went on as usual, he talked about everything that happened, he started fighting with his brothers again, which he hadn’t done in a long time and even though they were pissed off at him, they were happy to have him back.

“Um Harry,” you say at the end of the session. “I think-” you try to choose your words correctly. “I think it’s about time you start seeing another therapist, yeah?”

You see his face drop. “wh-why? I’m doing so much better, is..is it because of that night? I’m so sorry y/n”

“No it’s not that. You and I both know what’s happening between us, it’s wrong for a therapist to get emotionally attached with her patient. I’m sorry, Harry”

“So you’re saying that you’re becoming emotionally attached with me?”

“I..I’m-“

“It’s alright. I understand y/n”

“Yes, thank you. This has been great”

“So… now that you’re not my therapist, can I meet you for coffee this evening?”

“Harry-“

“Half an hour, Dr y/l/n. Just give me half an hour of your time, if you still feel the same way, I’ll never bother you again”

“Uh-" you hesitate. You knew you should have said no. You were going to say no. Yet the words which came out of your mouth were “Okay then, it’s a date”

--------------

Taglist:

@mischiefmanaged011 @notsosmexy @perspectiveparker @justanothermarvelmaniac @amorhollands @thisetaernallove @halfblood-princess-505 @spidey-reids-2003 @peterspideysstuff @musicalkeys @theliterarymess @ilarbu @hollands-weasley @tombob2005 @tommysparker @god-knows-what-am-i-doing @parkerpeter24 @more-like-reyna @hollandbroz-n-haz @aqiise

[fandom-scatteredthoughtsonpaper]

A birthday fic to correct the awful event Mammon got!

Countdown to Your Special Day

Mammon x Yuki (My MC)

Pronouns: Zie/zir, they/them. If it's easier to read, feel free to sub in they/them for the main pronouns

Tags: Light-hearted romance, fluff/comfort, slight misunderstandings, agender MC, self-indulgent

Words: 4436

[2 months and 1 day away]

-Yuki was curled up in the corner of the couch, concentrated on zir D.D.D. Zie had an open notebook next to zir, the pages filled with calculated numbers and final prices with names of potential websites beside them, some scribbled out and some circled.

-Mammon's birthday was coming up in a couple months, and Yuki had started late in saving money for the surprise zie had wanted to plan for him. He had mentioned it last year as an ideal day, and zie really wanted to make it happen, especially considering all zie did for him was write a bunch of heartfelt letters. Zie wanted to give him something to really experience this time.

-It was just a bit more expensive than zie had realized. Rentals next to a lake were nothing to sneeze at.

-So absorbed with zir phone, Yuki hadn't noticed Lucifer as he entered the library where zie had gone to avoid nosy demons.

-"What are you doing in here, Yuki?"

-Startled, zie dropped zir phone and reflexively covered the notebook. When Yuki realized it was Lucifer, zie relaxed and slumped back against the couch. "Oh, it's just you. Don't scare me like that."

-"That was a bit of a reaction. Are you doing something I should be aware of?"

-"No," was zir immediate response, but then zie reconsidered zir answer. Yuki had been fumbling numbers and trying to make a decision for hours. Zie wanted to do this zirself, but zie'd never done something like this and probably, reluctantly, needed some aid. "Actually, yeah. I need your... help."

-Lucifer blinked, surprised. He hadn't expected this stubborn human who actively tried to make his life harder to ask for help, but Yuki seemed genuine in zir request. "Alright. What is it?"

[1 month and 23 days away]

-Mammon was by the entrance to RAD, waiting for Yuki to come out so they could go home together. Zie had been preoccupied with Lucifer this morning and hadn't left with the younger brothers like usual.

-His day had felt off with Yuki's absence but walking home with zir would make up for it.

-Fiddling around on his D.D.D., checking his sells and ignoring demands from the witches, he occasionally glanced up when saw movement coming out, but it was never Yuki. Hearing familiar voices when the doors cracked open, Mammon took his attention off his phone. It was only Levi and Satan, but maybe Yuki was trailing shortly behind.

-"Mammon, what are you still doing here?"

-"Yeah, I thought you'd be long gone by now after the way you rushed out of the classroom."

-"Shaddup. What's it to ya?" He paused. "I was waitin' for Yuki. Did ya happen to see 'em in there?"

-"So honest. Just say that to begin with," Levi muttered.

-"I think Yuki left earlier with Barbatos."

-"Yep, I overheard Barbatos mention that Lord Diavolo wanted to talk with them about something."

-"What?! Yuki didn't mention anythin' about meetin' with Lord Diavolo to me."

-Satan quirked a bemused eyebrow at Mammon's response. "Why would Yuki need to run it by you about meeting with Lord Diavolo?"

-"LOLOL, it's because Yuki's been avoiding Mammon for a week now. He's been acting like a stray dog without Yuki around."

-Mammon bristled at Levi's comment but didn't rebuttal. He pocketed his phone and walked away from his brothers, darting through the courtyard to leave RAD.

-It was true Yuki had been distant-like the last few of days, but Mammon was sure it was temporary. Even he got tied up in circumstances and important events he couldn't squirm out of. Sometimes it couldn't be helped.

-It wasn't temporary.

[3 weeks and 5 days away]

-"Hey, Yuki--"

-"Sorry, Mammon, I'm running late for my shift. I'll talk to you later!"

-With that as a bye, Yuki was out the door and gone.

-Yuki was usually lackadaisical about any jobs zie took unless one of the brothers worked with zir or if the job required zir full attention. Mammon was usually the first to know if zie had to work, but when--

-"When did Yuki pick up a job?"

-"Jobs," Satan corrected. "Yuki is working at The Fall tonight."

-"The Fall?" Asmo questioned.

"Hold on, what do ya mean 'jobs'? I ain't heard Yuki say anythin' about picking up jobs willingly," Mammon stated, a bit annoyed. He was getting tired of hearing his brothers be more informed about Yuki than he was.

-"When was the last time Yuki actually talked to you, Mammon, that wasn't in passing?" Levi teased without bothering to look up from his game.

-"Hey! We've talked plenty!"

-"Sure, if you want to call those conversations."

-Mammon wanted to argue with Levi, but he really couldn't. He wasn't wrong. Yuki had been absent, and whenever Mammon did manage to talk to zir it was about short and trivial things. It made it hard not to be concerned about the situation of their relationship when Yuki, who was usually glued to his side and spent so much time with him, was suddenly avoiding him. His life had become a bit lonelier without Yuki around.

-"Anyway," Satan interjected, "they've been picking up a lot of shifts from different places the last few weeks. I'm surprised neither you or Asmo knew, considering the network you both have."

-"What the heck does that mean?"

-"It means you're gossiping normies," Levi jeered.

-"Is that s'posed to be an insult?"

-"Besides all that, I'm shocked Yuki picked up shifts at The Fall. I'd love to see the outfit their wearing," Asmo mused. "I'll have to visit them later! I'm sure Yuki will feel completely refreshed after seeing my lovely face."

-Oh, that's right. If Mammon visited Yuki during work hours, zie'd have no choice but to talk with him. He could finally ask zir what the hell has been going on and get an explanation. At the very least just see zir.

-"Well, I'm goin' too! So don't get any funny ideas!"

-"You're not going anywhere, Mammon. You have three extra credit assignments due soon, and you haven't started a single one. Have you?"

-Mammon jumped, frightened by Lucifer's sudden presence behind him. A nervous chill tingled down his spine, so he could only guess the scowl that Lucifer was burning into the back of his head. He tried searching for an excuse, but he was coming up dry.

-Dammit, Lucifer, any time but now!

"W-Well, ya see, dearest big bro--"

-Irritated, Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. He could feel a headache creeping on him. "That's what I thought. Mammon, my room. Now. I'm going to watch you finish your assignments, even if it takes all night."

[6 days away]

-Mammon simmered as he walked the hallway to Yuki's bedroom. Yuki had seen his messages, but zie was hardly responding to them, if zie did at all. The thought that he had unconsciously done or said something to offend Yuki teased his anxiety, but Mammon quickly squished it. Zie'd just been busy with work and had no off days, but according to Satan, zie only had one more shift.

-One more day that zie would be busy, but then after that zie'd have tons of free time. Yuki will be back by zir favorite demon's side, and then everything else will fall smoothly back into place.

-It was absurd how empty Mammon could feel with Yuki missing from his daily routines. It was worse than when zie had left, when all he could think about was zir where ever he went. Yuki was here though, so he didn't miss zir physically, not like when zie returned home.

-He missed talking with his human, about anything. He missed expecting to see zir when he turned his head. He was missing a piece of a puzzle, and it was aggravating when it was just in grasp, hiding from him.

-Yuki was going to receive a real earful. He deserved that much of complaining after how he'd been treated.

-That could wait though.

-It had been a while since Mammon and Yuki had gone out on a date, and he had just gotten paid from his latest photoshoot. He was confident if he met with Yuki face-to-face and invited zir out zie wouldn't say no.

-That had been the plan until he saw Yuki coming the down the corridor, walking with a purpose. An antsy feeling stabbed him in the gut.

-"Yuki!"

-Yuki froze mid-stride as Mammon approached zir. "Mammon."

-"Yeah, me! The Great Mammon has decided to bless ya with his presence since ya keep ignorin' my messages. Anyway! Guess who got paid today with a bonus? And guess who's gettin' treated to whatever they feel like tomorrow tonight?"

-"Sorry, Mammon, I can't. I have to go to the human world with Lucifer."

-"What'd'ya mean? I didn't hear nothin' 'bout Lucifer havin' to go to the human world."

"Regardless of what you did or didn't hear, it's true all the same. Yuki and I have an appointment in the human world and won't be back for a couple days. Your plans will have to be postponed for later."

-Why was something always blindsiding him lately?

-"What?! Well, if Yuki's goin', I'm goin' too!"

-"Absolutely not. I don't need you causing havoc when I take my eyes off you for more than a second. Don't worry, though, I'll need your company next week for a special trip to the human world."

-It had been quick, but Mammon had thought he had seen Yuki flicked zir eyes at Lucifer.

-"Mammon, it's just for a couple days. Do your best to tough it out. We'll hang out plenty after, okay?"

"Ya better keep your word."

[The Night Before]

-"Mammon, don't forget you're accompanying me to the human world tomorrow morning," Lucifer announced when everyone had sat down for dinner.

-"Yeah, yeah, I remember," Mammon replied. He wasn't the least bit interested in being ordered around doing paperwork and errands. Catching movement from his peripheral, Mammon noticed Yuki trying to look at him without being obvious. He just got zir back, and they had hardly spent any time together. He didn't want to leave, even if it was just a day. More than anything, he wanted to stay with Yuki. "You should definitely come too. You agree, don't ya, Yuki?"

-Yuki barely had the chance to open zir mouth, let alone formulate an answer, before Lucifer answered instead. "No, Yuki has other affairs to attend tomorrow. It's only a day, Mammon. I'm sure you'll be able to handle it, so don't complain."

-There wasn't any further comments about the trip, but Mammon made it obvious he was still hot under the collar with the way he stomped away, taking Yuki right along with him, when dinner concluded. He had been on cleaning duty with Belphie, but Lucifer offered in his place, quelling any complaints.

-Lucifer smiled amusedly to himself as he cleared the table. If only Mammon was aware enough to know what was planned for the day.

-"I can't believe that jerk," Mammon remarked as he dropped onto Yuki's bed. Yuki rolled zir eyes in response before sitting beside the grumpy demon. "I had plans I wanted to do tomorrow, ya know? Dammit! He just came back from the human world!"

-"Did you actually have plans?" Yuki asked it with a sarcastic tone, but zie was suddenly concerned. It was his birthday tomorrow, so maybe he had made plans that Yuki hadn't accounted for.

-Mammon glared at Yuki, his cheeks a shade darker than a moment prior, either from frustration or embarrassment wasn't certain. "I did," he stated softly.

"With who?"

"You, obviously!"

"Wait, we had plans tomorrow? What di--"

-Before Yuki could finish Mammon yanked zir down next to him, hugging zir tightly. Momentarily surprised, Yuki was slow to return the embrace. Zie expected him to be a bit clingy because zie'd been unavailable to be with him for a while, but this hug felt a bit too tight, desperate.

-"You said we could hang out after y'all returned from the human world, but we ain't had much time without being interrupted or the others butting in."

-"Ah. You're right," Yuki agreed. It's funny how zie had been planning this whole affair for Mammon, but in the process has unintentionally abandoned. Zie regretted that.

-"You're warm," he muttered into zir neck. "..I've missed ya like crazy. I've been dyin' to hug you, but it isn't actually enough now that I am. I'm not lettin' you go for the rest of the night."

-A soft sting of guilt hit Yuki's heart. Zie probably could have done a better job of trying to keep the surprise a secret without leaving Mammon completely in the dark, but between the jobs and helping Diavolo and classes taking up the majority of zir time... No, that wasn't an excuse. Yuki had hurt Mammon. That was obvious.

-Yuki entangled zir legs with Mammon's and reached zir arms around his waist, holding him close. Zie took a moment to just be with Mammon, inhaling his smell, hearing his heart beat. Zie had missed him too, a whole bunch, almost too much, but hopefully tomorrow would make up for the weeks of absence and neglect. "I missed you, too, Mammon. Just put up with it for a little bit longer."

[The Day!]

-"Happy birthday, Mammon!!"

-He had heard Yuki's voice before he had actually seen zir. He was flabbergasted to see zir come out of the cabin he had arrived at.

-When Mammon had woken up and joined the others for breakfast, Yuki had already left. It wasn't long after that Lucifer and he prepared for the trip to the human world. He had dragged his feet and groaned, making a show of not wanting to go. When Lucifer had sent Mammon ahead of him to get things ready, he thought it had been a punishment for his attitude, but after coming through the portal into the human world, he realized it wasn't in the city or anywhere near the hotel they usually stayed at.

-The scenery was beautiful and spacious, open in nature with cabins lining a sparking lake that had docks and piers dividing it. Unlike the city cramped full of people and towering buildings designed with glaring windows that bounced the bright sunlight off of them and funky smells, this area was full of trees that casted cool shadows and a refreshing breeze that rustled the leaves.

-Mammon was absolutely gobsmacked.

-Yuki beamed when zie saw the awestruck trance Mammon was in. Zie was hoping he'd like it. Mammon was definitely a city boy, but Yuki took a guess he enjoyed the lure of natural scenery too, based on their picnic date and walks through the forests.

-Mammon's daze broke when he saw Yuki approaching him. "What's goin' on, Yuki?"

-"C'mon, ya dummy, think! You didn't expect Lucifer to make you go on a business trip on your birthday, did you? It was his way of bringing you up here without being suspicious. Although, I thought you definitely would've caught on last week with what he said."

-He had completely forgotten about his birthday. Mammon had been entirely focused on Yuki and zir strange attitude that he'd spaced on even the date.

-"Oh."

-"Yeah, so," Yuki stepped back and spread zir arms out, displaying the lake on zir right and the cabin on zir left, "happy birthday... again! You mentioned a cabin by a lake as an ideal place to go, and you also wanted to rent a boat in the park, so I thought merging the two together would be a good idea! On top of that, I plan to 'spoil ya rotten all day'. What does the Great Mammon think?"

-"Ya know, I'm not deaf to the mocking tone. You're killin' the mood before it's even started, but I guess I can let it slide!"

[Final Hours]

-As the dimming daylight darkened through the pulled curtains, Yuki and Mammon lounged restfully on the couch. Mammon used Yuki's lap as a pillow as zie stroked zir fingers against his head. The tingling feeling traveled down his spine and relaxed his body. He could probably fall asleep in this position with Yuki brushing his hair with such tender touches. If they were at the House of Lamentation, they wouldn't be able to have this kind of moment without being interrupted by his brothers. Too bad the day was coming to an end.

-Dwelling on the negative thought caused him to unintentionally frown, and Yuki noticed the crease on his brow. Zie poked his forehead to get his attention, and his eyes opened to see Yuki leaning over him.

-"What are you thinking about?"

-"That we'll have to go back to the Devildom tomorrow. How am I s'posed to accept that after today? Today was too good to end like that, ya know?"

-Yuki hummed in agreement. Zie briefly looked away as a thoughtful expression morphed zir features. "Well," zie started, zir eyes focused back on Mammon, "I couldn't afford to stay for more than one night. My birthday is just a few months away, so maybe you could plan something for us, like when you rented the pool."

-Mammon felt a pang of short-lived guilt for complaining. Yuki had worked hard to save enough money to rent this cabin, even with Diavolo hooking zir up months in advance. "I still can't believe ya didn't just tell me. I was actually..."

-"Worried you did something? Sorry, Mammon. I should have said something, but I was nervous that I couldn't keep it a secret. I was too excited to not tell you, but then the jobs piled up and I promised to help Diavolo in exchange for talking the price down with the owner. I shouldn't have ignored you though. I'm sorry."

-There was a lull in their conversation, but it was only a slightly weighted silence. The misunderstandings were cleared up and today was one of the best days Mammon had ever had, spending it alone with Yuki. He would have enjoyed it even if it hadn't been his birthday and with Yuki pampering him all day.

-"C'mere," Mammon said as he placed a warm hand against the back of Yuki's neck, pulling zir down for a kiss. "You're goin' to have to take responsibility for my feelings. You're the reason I was stressin' out. The whole time you were busy workin' your ass off for this trip, I was thinkin' of you. As your first, I'm entitled to know what you're doin'. I'm gonna get my fill of ya tonight before we have to head home. I've got weeks worth to get outta ya."

-Yuki's cheeks heated as Mammon greedily kissed zir lips. Zie silently agreed that zie wanted to get the most out of Mammon while they were still alone, but one night of trying to cram almost a month and a half of time lost wasn't possible.

-"Your lips are warm," Mammon murmured as they separated. "That wasn't nearly enough to satisfy me though. I wanna show ya how much I appreciate you."

-"What, uh, what do you wanna do?"

-"Right now? Nothin'. Bein' with ya like this is enough for the moment. I love you, Yuki."

-An explosion of emotions surged through Yuki's chest to the rest of zir body, making zir giddy with adoration. Zie wasn't sure how zie was containing it, but staring down into Mammon's eyes, seeing his tinted cheeks, and him just relaxing with zir simultaneously fueled zir feelings more while also grounding zir.

-"I love you, too, Mammon."

[justahopelessssromantic]

Hey girl. If I could request a song fic with either "unless it's with you" or "deserve" by Christina Aguilera for Angel ❤️💕. Hopefully fluff because I'm a sucker for happy but I'll love anything you write! Thank you!!

Unless It’s With You

*Both songs are amazing 😍 and I will probably be getting to Deserve in the near future as well! This one was so fun to write and I really hope you enjoy it! It got me feeling all warm and fuzzy 😊*

*gif not mine*

Warnings: Just some much needed pure fluff for our boy Angel

Never wanted to feel weak in love, give up control. Never wanted to let down my guard, be vulnerable. Never wanted to feel helpless or too comfortable. I make it on my own, hey.

Like many people before you, you had been hurt in love, brutally. Ever since then you swore to yourself you would never put yourself through that pain again. You built walls, high and sturdy. And no one was going to break those down. You weren’t ever going to let love make you weak, again. You were terrified of getting too close, feeling too safe with another person and them throwing you away and crushing your heart, leaving you alone and broken once more.

I've been thinking a lot about the way that people change.The most beautiful beginnings can go down in flames. It's inevitable, and that's what's got me so afraid. I'd rather be alone.

It was easier and safer being single, a sacrifice you were willing to make. Not only had it happened to you but you had seen the same thing happen to almost all the people in your life. They were happy and in love and then all of a sudden their relationships were crumbling around them, they were breaking up and getting divorced.

It was as if the promises and vows they made never mattered.

You couldn’t do that to yourself, you wouldn’t. So you made the decision to never get married, and if possible not to fall in love, it was just safer that way.

And then life through you a curveball, sending you your very own personal angel.

I don't want no white picket fence. Dozen roses and a wedding dress. Fairy tales are fake happiness. But here we are and I must confess.

You took a deep breath as you tried to calm your nerves, standing there in your white dress preparing to walk down the aisle, tying the knot with the love of your life, something you thought you would never be doing. Your mind reflected on how you got here as you waited as patiently as you could for your cue.

Yeah, I'm in over my head feeling confused. I'm losing my mind, don't know what to do.

You laid in bed snuggled up against Angel’s chest, his arm wrapped around you leaving a light trail as he slowly ran his fingers up and down your spine. You sighed content listening to the steady beat of his heart, you were happier than you had ever been in your life.

You never wanted marriage and Angel knew this fairly quickly on in your relationship. He respected you and respected your wishes, the perfect gentlemen. He always thought he would be married one day but he loved you and just getting to be with you was enough for him.

You sat up and looked at him, this man who had turned your world upside down, tore all your defenses down. With him you could be completely open, vulnerable, and you always felt safe.

You had been thinking a lot recently, about your decision to never get married. You never thought you would let your guard down enough to fall so strongly for another that you would discard the rules you put in place to protect yourself, protect your heart.

But Angel had you reconsidering. He showed you what real love was. He was the most compassionate and caring person you had ever met and you loved him more than you even thought possible.

“Why you lookin’ at me like that?” He asked, sitting up and taking your hands into his large warm ones. The rough pads of his thumbs brushing against the back of your hands. “What’s on your mind, mi amor?”

You gulped, butterflies fluttering all around your stomach because of what you were about to say, “You know I don’t wanna get married,” you started to say.

“I know,” he said gently, cupping your face in his hand, “Just having you as my girl is enough.”

You smiled at his kind words. You weren’t sure how you got so lucky to find this wonderful man. “Unless it’s with you.”

He stared at you, mouth agape for a moment before he fully registered what you were trying to say. The corners of his mouth spread into the largest smile you had ever seen graze his beautiful face, as he looked at you, full of love, “Are you proposing, mi dulce?”

“Well, what do you say Angel Ignacio Reyes?” You asked, looking into his rich eyes, “Will you do me the honor of making me your wife?”

“You already know my answer.” The smile was still plastered to his face, “There’s nothing I want more in my life than to spend the rest of it with you as Mrs. (Y/N) Reyes.”

He brought his hand gently behind your neck pulling you into him for a deep, passionate kiss.

Pulling away he looked into your eyes once more, “You sure about this though? Cause once it’s done you can’t take it back. Til death do us part and all that shit.” He smirked, eyebrow raised.

“Til death do us part and all that shit, baby,” you grinned, bringing him in for another kiss.

You came into my life when I wasn't trying to find anybody to love, hiding what I felt inside.

You recalled the moment you first laid eyes on Angel. Honestly you judged him harshly at first, but in time you realized how wrong you were. Angel was nothing like how you thought he’d be, surprising you in every way.

You were pulled off to the side of the road, hood of your vehicle up as you wafted away the smoke coming out of it. You and this car had been through everything together but it had finally given in and petered out on you.

“Aw come on!” You exclaimed frustratedly, kicking the bumper before pacing off away from the old thing.

You held your phone up praying you could get some sort of signal out there in the middle of nowhere. Reaching up onto your tiptoes you stretched as far as you could as if that was gonna magically grant you service, as the rumbling of a motorcycle came sounding down the dirt road your way.

You pulled your arm down and looked at the man as he pulled up next to you. You cautiously put your phone into your pocket as you approached the stranger, he wasn’t exactly what you had in mind for help but you didn’t have many options.

“You aren’t gonna find any service out here querida.” He said matter of factly as he got off his bike, slipping his helmet off and swaggering your way.

This guy screamed trouble to you. Tall, sexy, and cocky, arms covered in ink, wearing a leather cut that read Mayans. This man was a heartbreaker you could tell, he was used to getting what he wanted, probably had a different woman wrapped around his finger every night.

“How about I give you a ride? You can call a tow when we get into town.” He offered stopping just a few feet away from you.

You thought for a moment as you weighed your options looking back at his motorcycle behind him. You could wait here for who knows how long and hope the next person that came along wasn’t a weirdo, or you could try walking the however many miles it was until you found service, or you could take your chances by hopping on the back of this stranger’s bike.

“My mama taught me never to take rides from strangers.” You said crossing your arms.

“I’m Angel,” he said, grinning smugly, “And you are?”

“(Y/N)”

“Well (Y/N)” he said, your name tasting heavenly in his mouth. If love at first sight was real, then he could have sworn this must have been what if felt like. “Now we aren’t strangers.”

“And how do I know you’re not some crazy killer who’s gonna toss me into some ditch, Angel?” You flirted, quirking your eyebrow. This man was already breaking away at those sturdy walls you had expertly put up so long ago.

“I could ask you the same thing.” He quipped back, “I guess we’ll just have to trust each other, or you could wait for some other person to come rollin’ up and take your chances with them, but not a lot of people come down this road, querida.”

You contemplated for a moment before finally giving in, not seeing much of a choice, “Fine,” you said , “but if you try anything I won’t hesitate to take you down, Angel. ”

“Fair enough,” he chuckled, closing the gap between you and gently placing his helmet over your head. You held your breath as he clasped it securely under your chin, his fingers just barely brushing against your skin.

You reached into your car grabbing your bag, and taking his hand that he had extended out towards you.

Leading you over to his bike, he placed his hands delicately on your hips as he helped you mount it before climbing on in front of you. “Hang on!” He called out to you behind him, grinning as he felt your arms wrap around his waist.

And you have been ever since.

But you opened me up and now I finally realize. I'll be your girl for life.

You tried to deny your feelings, push him away but he was stubborn and persistent.

“Just one date,” he pleaded for what felt like the hundredth time, “let me treat you for just one night. If you hate it I promise I’ll leave you alone, won’t ask again.”

If one date would shut this man up then fine you thought to yourself, “Ok, one.” You said sternly, trying to fight the smile you felt as he got all excited, not expecting you to finally agree.

All it took was that one date for him to start opening you up. What took you years to build the man was breaking down in the matter of days. It wasn’t long before you truly felt that you would be his girl for life.

We don't need a big audience. Thousand people we never met. Me and you and a couple of friends. And here we are and I must confess

Now here you were, arm linked to your father’s as you stared down the aisle, making intimate eye contact with this man who held your heart, as you did his.

His smile lit up the room as he looked at you. There you were looking breathtakingly beautiful, a smile to match his own as you both just stared lovingly at each other. His heart swelled as his eyes began to water, he wasn’t sure how he got so lucky, but he would be thanking God everyday you had together.

It was a small ceremony with just your closest friends and family, the club taking up more than half of the seats, but you wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

Besides it could have been just you and Angel there and the two of you wouldn’t have noticed, your full attention on each other.

As you walked closer you could see the tears in his eyes and it took everything in you to keep your own back.

Beating heart and trembling hands. Take me just the way I am. 'Cause all that I want is one and the same. For the rest of my days.

Your heart raced as he took your hands in his, steadying them with his touch, your father giving you away and having a seat. You had never been so sure in your life about anything or anyone until this moment, the moment you and Angel would become man and wife. He accepted you fully and completely for who you were, you doing the same for him. As long as you were together you didn’t care what you were doing, just having each other for the rest of your days was good enough for the two of you.

And oh, I know it's scary. I know that it's true, I'm saying "I do"

“I do,” you breathed out, smiling at the heavy meaning behind such small words.

You blocked out everything Hank was saying, as he was the one officiating the ceremony, your eyes nevering leaving the others, the words “You may now kiss your bride,” being the only ones left that the two of you cared about.

Swooping you into his arms, Angel kissed you lovingly, your bodies melting into each other as the guests all cheered and hollered.

Pulling away you beamed at each other before turning your attention to the closest people in your lives, hands entwined, feeling as if the two of you were on cloud nine, ready to face everything and anything together for the rest of your days, as man and wife.

'Cause I don't want to get married. Unless it's with you, unless it's with you.

[helloalycia]

solar flare // kara danvers

SUMMARY: Unaware that your girlfriend is Supergirl, things get a little confusing when she gets into an accident that should have threatened her life.

WARNING/S: mentions of death.

Author's note: this has been sat in my drafts for a looooong time, along with a bunch of other stuff that I'll probably be putting out over the next few days. Sorry it's a little shit lol 

masterlist

       I felt my dreamscape fading as I realised somebody was shuffling next to me, eventually making me open my eyes tiredly. I realised it was Kara, evidently uncomfortable, trying to find a comfortable position. I groaned quietly, trying to wake myself up a little more so I could ask her what's wrong.

       "Sorry," she whispered, sounding exhausted.

      "Mmmt's okay," I mumbled incoherently, before motioning for her to come closer.

      She instantly moved towards me, tucking her head into the crook of my neck. I wrapped my free arm around her waist, resting my hand on the slight exposed skin where the hem of her shirt was. I heard her breathe out contently and I pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head before trying to fall asleep again.

      That morning, I ended up waking up before Kara, so I did my usual boring routine before deciding to cook some breakfast for us both. It didn't take long and by the time I was done, Kara walked into the kitchen area, a sleepy smile on her lips.

      "Good morning," she said, approaching me with open arms.

      I accepted her hug with a smile, kissing her cheek before saying, "Morning, sleepyhead. I made breakfast."

      "I can see that," she noted, staring out at the island, where everything was. "You didn't need to do that."

      I ushered her to take a seat as I said, "It's nothing special unfortunately. Just some eggs and whatnot. Buuuuut I figured since I'm here, I may as well make the effort. It might make you reconsider about us moving in together."

      Kara sighed, massaging her forehead with discomfort. "Y/N..."

      "If it's about staying in your flat, I'm completely okay with it," I added hopefully. "I mean, of course I'll miss my place, but if it means I get to see you every day then it's worth it, right?"

      "Y/N, please, not today," she said, giving me a pleading look. "I'm just... I'm not in the mood."

      I breathed out slowly. "Right, sorry."

      Kara and I had been together for almost two years and I had proposed the idea of us moving in together a few months ago, since we pretty much spent most nights together anyway. I was instantly met with rejection, Kara claiming she wasn't ready. At first, I respected her decision, hoping it was just nerves and she'd eventually come around, but I was still waiting for the latter to happen.

      I served up breakfast and the two of us sat there in an awkward silence, until I finally decided to say something.

      "We still on for drinks with my friends after work?" I asked, glancing up at the quiet blonde.

      Kara's expression told me everything I need to know - she'd forgotten. After swallowing a sip-full of orange juice, probably to buy time, she nodded. "Yeah, yeah, of course. I'll be there."

      "You sure?"

      She nodded. "Of course."

      "If you're not up for it, it's fine," I said, giving her a knowing look.

      "I said I'll be there," she promised, dropping her fork to grab my hand and give it a supportive squeeze. "I'm not feeling well, but I'm sure it'll pass. Sorry for being off this morning... you hate me?"

      I gave her a small smile, unable to resist her adorable sparkling blue eyes. "I could never."

***

      "...it worked out though because I got the promotion, so yeah, that's how I got here," Y/BF/N finished explaining with a bright smile.

      "She says it so simply, but it took a lot of hardworking and perseverance on her part," her boyfriend, Hasan, added, making me laugh.

      "Oh, shut up," Y/BF/N said with a blushing face, nudging her boyfriend in the arm.

      I smiled at the two of them, admiring how cute they looked. I was having a long overdue catch up with my best friend and also meeting her new boyfriend. Well, they'd been together for almost six months, but he'd been on a business trip, so I was only just now meeting him. Kara was here, too, as promised, but she was acting a little off, worrying me a little. She was usually a bubbly personality, especially when it came to Y/BF/N, but all she'd been doing this evening was giving one-word responses and playing with my hand under the table.

      "You guys want any more drinks? I'm gonna get another," I said, already standing up.

      "Yeah sure, same again if you don't mind," Y/BF/N said.

      "Thanks," Hasan added, nodding.

      "Same again, got it," I said, before looking to Kara. "C'mon, Kara, you can give me a hand."

      She seemed reluctant, but nodded and allowed me to drag her away from the table and to the bar. I ordered the drinks as Kara spoke.

      "Did you really need my help to carry two drinks?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

      I gave her a knowing look. "Kara, I asked for you help because I want to know what's wrong with you."

      "What do you mean?"

      "Kara, you know what I mean," I said. "You're acting weird and the others are beginning to notice. What's wrong?"

      She sighed, frowning and avoiding my eyes. "I don't really want to be here..."

      "Here's your drinks, Miss," the bartender said, pushing two glasses towards me.

      "Cheers." I nodded his way before looking back to Kara with worried eyes. "I asked you this morning if you were still up for it. And again before we came in here."

      "I know, but I just don't feel well," she admitted, giving me an apologetic glance, "and you were really looking forward to tonight."

      I grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently. "Kara, I'm sorry if I made you feel like you had to come tonight. That wasn't my intention"

      "You didn't," she reassured, meeting my eyes.

      "Well, either way, I think we can call it a night," I said, giving her a small smile.

      "You don't have to leave just because of me-"

      "It's okay," I cut her off, grabbing the drinks from the bar. "Come on. Let's go back to mine."

      She followed me to the table and I set the drinks down before grabbing my jacket.

       “I'm really sorry, guys, but Kara isn't feeling too good, so I think we're gonna call it a night," I said with an apologetic smile. "It was really great to catch up though, and of course, to meet you Hasan."

      "Aw, okay, I hope you feel better, Kara," Y/BF/N said, standing up and pulling us both in for a hug. "It was nice to see you both again."

      "Thanks," Kara said, forcing a small smile.

      "It was a pleasure, ladies," Hasan said, giving us a quick hug. "Hopefully we can meet again soon."

      "Of course," I agreed, looking between them, before putting some money on the table. "Drinks are on me. Enjoy yourselves."

      Kara and I left the bar, only to find ourselves in some terrible weather. It was chucking it down, making us both stay standing under the the umbrella extending from the roof of the bar.

      "Damn, okay, this isn't going to help with you not feeling well," I muttered, glancing out at the road to see if I could spot a taxi. I looked to Kara, saying, "Just wait here. I'm gonna try and get a taxi for us."

      Kara nodded and I headed out from the umbrella, feeling the cold rain smack down on me harshly. I sighed and stood on the edge of the pavement, looking out to see if I could spot a taxi in the distance. Eventually, in the darkness, I could spot the familiar yellow bumper of a taxi under the nearest street lamp, so I raised my hand to get its attention. It flashed its headlights briefly, so I lowered my hand and watched as it came to stop by me, except as it tried to pull over to the side, its tyres skidded in the rain and propelled the car towards at me at a dangerous speed.

      I barely had the chance to register what was happening because everything moved so fast. One second I was stood at the edge of the pavement with headlights beaming at me, and the next I was on the wet ground, trying to understand why people were shouting around me.

      "Miss, are you okay? Can you hear me?"

      I looked up and saw a stranger trying to help me stand up. I looked around with confusion, only to see a few people gathered around a body in front of the taxi. A few more people were helping the taxi driver out of his cab and I realised that I was about to get hit, but someone had pushed me out the way. Wait a minute...

      "Kara?!" I yelled, shoving the stranger out of my way to see if Kara was where I left her, but she wasn't.

  ��   I immediately ran over to the body in front of the taxi and felt my heart drop to the pit of my stomach when I saw the state she was in.

      "Kara, oh my god, no, Kara," I cried out, kneeling by her side.

      She was bleeding from her head, it soaking into her wet hair. The rain was washing the blood into a puddle all around her, which made me see the odd angle her leg was twisted in.

      "Please open your eyes," I begged, my own eyes blurring with tears. I cupped her face, hoping she'd wake up, but I knew it was impossible. I leaned down and held my breath, hoping she would breathe to let me know she was alive. After what felt like forever, I felt a tickle against my skin, and I sat up with relief.

      "We've called an ambulance, Miss," someone said from behind me, but I couldn't formulate a response because I was too focused on how pale Kara was getting as each second passed.

      The ambulance arrived soon enough, but I couldn't remember the specifics because it went by in a blur. They were hooking Kara up to a bunch of machines and it was frightening me, seeing her look so vulnerable. I must have called Alex at one point during the ride because when I got to the hospital and ushered to the waiting room, Alex was already there.

      When she saw me, she immediately came to give me a reassuring hug.

      "I'm sorry, Alex, I don't know why she did that," I rambled out, feeling the guilt sink in. "She said she didn't want to come and I shouldn't have made her because then we wouldn't be in this mess. I'm so sorry."

      Alex grabbed my arms and looked me in the eyes. "Y/N, calm down, it's okay. You can't blame yourself for what happened. But I need you to listen carefully, okay?"

      I nodded, still feeling discomfort in my gut.

      "I'm going to talk to Kara's doctors and get her transferred," she explained.

      I furrowed my brows. "Transferred? Why would you do that?"

      "I'll explain after, I just need you to stay calm and know that Kara will be okay."

      I shook my head. "Alex, she looked really bad. I'm scared that... I don't know."

      "I promise you she's going to be fine," she said confidently. "Now, I'm gonna talk to the doctors and when I get back, we're gonna take a drive."

      "Alex-"

      "Trust me, Y/N," she said, giving me a slight nod before leaving me standing in the waiting room, wondering what the hell was happening.

      Alex returned, as promised, and she led me to her car before driving us to God knows where. I tried to get some answers out of the older Danvers sister, but she refused to budge and insisted I'd find out eventually. So, I was left to worry about Kara's life and wondering why Alex was so sure she'd be okay. It was her little sister and she didn't even seem concerned?

      We reached our destination soon enough and I grew confused as I saw how secure this location was. I'd probably walked by this building so many times, yet never questioned its existence. I'd apparently never noticed the armed guards at the doors either.

      "Come on, this way," Alex finally spoke when we left the car.

      I sucked up a shaky breath and wiped away at my tears as I followed her through the building. The guards by the door seemed to know who she was as they straightened up with respect and let her pass. We took a lift up to which Alex seemed nervous, glancing my way every now and then. I desperately wanted to ask her where we were and if Kara was here, too, but I knew she'd give me the same response each time, so I stayed quiet.

      Finally, the doors opened and I widened my eyes with surprise, taking in the vast room before me. There were people dressed in uniform all around, some at control panels and their attention focused on the giant monitors on the wall, others walking around with serious expressions.

      I followed Alex like a lost lamb, letting her lead me up some stairs onto the balcony above. I tried to look around the room for a symbol or a logo - something that would tell me where we were, but I couldn't find anything distinguishable. I continued to follow Alex until we reached a room with glass windows, allowing me to see inside. I did a double take when I realised Kara was inside, laying on a bed, motionless.

      "Kara!" I shouted, already running inside to her bedside.

      I startled some of the (what I'm guessing are) nurses, as they moved out of my way. Alex waved her hand, signalling for them to leave.

      "Why is she here?" I asked, worriedly, realising she wasn't in surgery or being treated for her visible injuries. "What's this...?" I motioned to the light sources above her, emitting some sort of yellow light on her pale skin. "She should be in surgery or something. Alex!"

      I looked over my shoulder to see Alex stepping by my side, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and leading me away from her bedside for the moment. I wiped away my tears and waited for an explanation.

      "I know you're confused and you're scared, but Y/N, I need you to listen to me," Alex spoke calmly, never breaking eye contact. I nodded as she continued. "As crazy as this sounds, you need to believe what I'm about to say. Kara needs you to."

      "Alex, you're starting to scare me," I said, feeling shivers run down my spine. "What's wrong with Kara?"

      Alex bit her lower lip before taking a breath. "Remember how I said Kara is gonna be fine?" I nodded as she continued, "Well, she is. She looks battered and bruised now, but it's because she exerted her powers and has momentarily lost them. A solar flare."

      I stared at Alex like she was a ghost. "What the hell are you talking about?" I was convinced she'd lost her mind at this point. Maybe it was the shock of Kara's accident or something, but she was definitely not making sense.

      "Y/N, Kara is Supergirl," she said bluntly. "The reason she's been off lately is because she's been agitated that she doesn't have her powers and she can't help people."

      I gave her a confused look. "Alex, you sound insane!"

      "Look, we're at the DEO," she continued to explain, not fazed by my judgemental expression. "I'm the director. We work to handle any extra-terrestrial threats invading our planet and we do that with the help of Supergirl."

      I felt my heart rate increasing with every word she spoke. I could barely keep up with what she was saying.

      "My parents adopted Kara when she landed on Earth," she explained, and I tried to understand. "She wears those glasses to hide her identity and to help with her x-ray vision."

      "X-ray vision?" I squeaked helplessly.

      She nodded. "Yes. I can even show you the suit, but Y/N, I'm telling you this because I need you to understand that Kara will be fine. She's technically vulnerable like a human, but as soon as her powers come back, she'll heal with those UV lamps and be absolutely fine."

      Alex searched my eyes to see what I was thinking. I stared at her, letting her words digest, before finally speaking.

      "Please tell me you're joking."

      She groaned, before grabbing my shoulders. "Y/N! Look at her!" She twisted me around, forcing me to look at Kara. "She's Supergirl! You have to believe me."

      I knew she was right, as much as I didn't want to admit it. If I admitted it, it meant that she didn't trust me with her secret and that she made me worry for her life when she would be fine this whole time.

      "She didn't tell me," I finally spoke, my voice barely above a whisper.

      I calmed down a little, reassured that she would be okay, but that didn't change the fact that I thought she was going to die not long ago. I felt like hot water bubbling over, trying to settle after someone turned the gas off, but I couldn't quite keep up.

      "I'm sure she had her reasons, Y/N," Alex began sympathetically, but I cut her off.

      "How do I get out of here?" I asked, tearing my gaze away from Kara and looking to Alex.

      "You're leaving?" Alex sounded surprised.

      "She'll be fine, right?" I asked and Alex nodded, about to respond, but I rolled my eyes and gave her a sarcastic smile. "Of course she will be - she's the Girl of Steel! Now, how do I get out of here?"

      "Y/N, come on," Alex tried to reason.

      "Come on what? She didn't-" I swallowed the lump in my throat. "She didn't tell me. There's nothing more to say. Now, please let me go home."

      Alex searched my eyes for something more, and when she found nothing, she sighed and nodded before leading me out. I glanced at Kara one last time, feeling distaste at the thought of everything that had just happened, before following Alex.

***

      I found myself lounging on my couch the next day, sulking into a bowl of popcorn as I watched The Office reruns. I was trying to use the show as a distraction, but all that was on my mind was Kara. I tried to imagine her as Supergirl, remembering all those times I'd seen the hero on the news or flying in the sky. That was her.

      All those times when she'd bail on a date last minute, or when she'd leave a date early... it made sense. Why she didn't like the idea of taking a mini vacation with me, or sleeping over at hers all the time. I thought it was a weird quirk of hers, or that she was insecure about something, but no, she was too busy flying around National City.

      And that explained why she didn't want to move in together. She hadn't told me the truth about her, so moving in and seeing her act even more secretive would raise questions. Here was me thinking she was losing interest, but no, she was hiding a huge part of herself.

      I constantly tried to wonder why she didn't trust me. I mean, almost two years of being together was a long time. I thought I knew everything about her and vice versa. Why was this any different? I could care less if she was an alien and she knew that, so what was the reason?

      Kara let me believe she was human. Vulnerable, breakable and soft, like me. She got hit by a car and let me believe, even for a moment, that she could have died. That it would have been my fault that she died, or at least, suffered major injuries. She let my mind run around with those horrible thoughts and scenarios, let it break me apart as I watched her limp, bruised and battered body lying on the wet tarmac.

      She didn't tell me the truth.

      I groaned loudly and stuffed more popcorn into my mouth when I realised I was getting stuck in my thoughts all over again - the same thoughts that had kept me up all night. I tried to focus my attention on what was happening on the TV when I heard a knock on my door.

      I rolled my eyes and glanced at the door before choosing to ignore whoever it was and wallow in my own self-pity.

      "Y/N, I know you're in there!" a voice called from the other side of the door, and I recognised it as Kara's.

      I clenched my jaw and ignored her.

      "I can see you watching TV," she said in a hushed voice. "Please open the door. I have to explain."

      "That must be the x-ray vision, right?" I called back, bitterly.

      I heard her sigh. "If you don't open the door, I'm gonna come in."

      "That would be breaking in," I reminded her, before getting comfortable on the couch. "Go away."

      It went quiet and I assumed she'd listened, but then I heard a loud crack. I looked to the door with a puzzled expression and stared wide-eyed at Kara, who had twisted the door knob enough to break the lock. She stepped in and pulled a face at the slight crack in the lock.

      "I'll get that fixed, I swear," she said quickly, glancing up at me.

      "You can't just break into somebody's home like that!" I yelled at her, standing up to glare at her.

      "You're not somebody," she pointed out, closing the door behind her, "and I told you I would come in."

      I crossed my arms across my chest, narrowing my glare. Admittedly, I was taken aback by the lack of injuries she had. Or should I say absence of injuries. I knew Alex said she would heal like nothing had happened, but it was different to see it with my own two eyes. It was like the accident had't happened. The colour was back in her skin, her head wasn't bleeding, she was walking. She looked as good as new, save for the sudden super strength I had just witnessed. Another thing I should have expected but was still surprised to see.

      "I have to explain myself," she began, carefully.

      "Alex caught me up on everything," I said angrily, "Supergirl."

      She frowned, looking down at her shoes guiltily. "I wanted to tell you, Y/N."

      I raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Was that before or after you almost died? Because saving an important piece of information like the fact that you're fucking indestructible would have been nice to know before I thought you were going to die because of me!"

      "Y/N-"

      "No!" I shouted, feeling my eyes grow watery at the reminder of last night. "You let me believe the worst, Kara! I thought you were going to die! You didn't see what I saw, okay?! There was blood and there- there were so many scratches and the puddle was turning r-red and I thought you were leaving me and it- it would be my fault because I made you come to see my friends and- and- and-"

      "Y/N, it's okay," she cut in, moving forward to stand me up straight.

      I was crying, I realised, my throat closed up and my vision blurred. I was too upset to push her away, and the warmth coming from her skin reminded me that she was here and alive and well, only intensifying my sobs.

      "Y-you should have told me," I cried into her shoulder. "I thought you were going to leave me."

      She wrapped her arms around me and squeezed gently, reassuringly. "I know," she agreed, her voice hoarse. I felt her nod several times as she said, "You're right. I should've told you. I'm sorry, Y/N. I'm so sorry."

      I swallowed thickly, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat. "Why didn't you?"

      She breathed out as I quietened down, managing myself the best I could. She pulled away, letting me see her glassy blue eyes behind her glasses. She pulled her glasses off, pocketing them, before rubbing the bridge of her nose and meeting my eyes again.

      "It wasn't because of you," she reassured firstly. "It wasn't. I just kept putting it off. I didn't know how to say it and I never found the time. It's a stupid reason, I know. I wish I had something better. But I don't. I can only apologise, Y/N."

      I pursed my lips in thought. Her eyes were darting between mine nervously and I tried to think what I could say.

      "Do you hate me?" she spoke quietly, almost expectantly.

      I felt her grip on my waist loosen as she prepared herself for my answer. I shook my head.

      "I could never hate you," I answered. "I love you, Kara."

      A hint of a smile ghosted her lips as she looked down, breathing out with relief.

      "I want you to tell me everything," I continued, earning her attention. "I want to hear it from you."

      She nodded. "Of course."

      "And I want you to be honest with me from here on out," I added, giving her a knowing look. "You can't hide stuff from me, especially when it involves Supergirl."

      "I promise I'll tell you everything," she said with a nod.

      I read her expression, sensing the honesty. Satisfied with my instructions, I moved forward and wrapped my arms around her shoulders. I closed my eyes, appreciating her presence, even if she pissed me off a little.

      She returned the embrace, pressing a kiss to my neck before pulling me closer.

       “You'll never lose me," she said quietly. "I promise."

[katedrakeohd]

#Wacky Drabbles

Prompt #4 we need to identify the source of the problem

For @emceesynonymroll and my fellow:

Wacky Drabblers: @jessiembruno @brightpinkpeppercorn @jovialyouthmusic @sirbeepsalot @bobasheebaby @burnsoslow

@qween-corgis

Rated: PG for swearing

Word count: approx 3000

Dinner Discourse

Drake sits at the kitchen table watching Kate help her mother prepare dinner. He can't help but notice how much Kate and Lorraine look alike in their matching aprons. Although Lorraine’s hair is shorter and contains more grey, it's similar in color to Kate’s, and they're close to being the same height. While Kate chops ingredients for salad, her mother is stirring a pot of sauce on the stove. As they chat quietly at the counter, Lorraine periodically scolds Kate for talking with her hands while she's holding a knife.

Lorraine glances over her shoulder at Drake when he starts chuckling, “I didn't know that preparing food was a spectator sport. Or that it was so entertaining.”

Drake grins back, “I like to watch Kate work in the kitchen. It's such a rare thing to see these days. Besides if you think she looks dangerous talking with a knife in her hand you should have seen her cut our wedding cake with a sword!”

Kate shoots a glare at Drake for mentioning the wedding that her Mom wasn't even invited to. When her Mom's mouth drops open in shock, Kate gestures toward her with the knife in her hand and gives him a disapproving look. Seriously? He shrugs back at her and mouths sorry.

Lorraine admonishes Kate for her reckless behavior, “Seriously? Isn't using a sword a little bit dramatic even if you are a Duchess now?”

Kate pops a slice of cucumber into her mouth before answering. “Well the sword was a wedding gift. At least it was thoroughly cleaned off before the cake cutting. It came in very handy when I was fighting assassins earlier that day.” Kate's amused by her Mom's wide eyed expression when she looks at Drake to confirm what she's just heard.

“Fighting off assassins on your wedding day? You can't be serious.”

Drake gets up from the table and walks over to give Kate a hug from behind and a kiss on the cheek. “Oh we're deadly serious. The two of us were even kidnapped from our wedding reception. Your daughter and I fought off a whole crew of bad guys with the help of our friends. Kate is a total badass.”

Lorraine steps back from the stove, her hand going to her hip as she tries to make sense of what she's hearing. She points her finger at them both. “Oh my God why didn't you tell me any of this? Or that you were in so much danger?” Although the question is directed at Kate, her eyes are glaring at Drake accusingly as if it's his fault her daughter was in harm's way.

Kate leans back into Drake and his arms tighten around her protectively. “Look Mom, it's not like you could have done anything about my situation. I have Drake to protect me, and I have bodyguards and powerful friends who will always have my back. I'm not some quivering flower either. Besides I survived living in New York city by myself long before Drake even met me.”

“All kidding aside Mrs. Darling, I love Kate and I'd never let anything bad happen to her. I've taken a bullet for her, and even won a duel against a trained swordsman in defense of her honor. I assure you she's in good hands.” Drake insists.

Turning back to the stove to tend to the pots and picking up her spoon again, Lorraine shakes her head and sighs. “The fact that you had to put your own life on the line and be so brave to protect my daughter does little to reassure me Drake. As much as I appreciate you being there for her, it's the fact that there are people out there wanting to do her harm that worries me.”

Kate pats Drake on the arm and then he lets her go back to finish making the salad.

“I told you Drake, my Mom's no pushover. You'll have to rope the darn moon to make her happy.”

Lorraine chuckles, “Well I don't know about roping the moon, but he can start by setting the table for dinner.”

Drake nods, “Yes ma'am.” And after being shown where to find everything he goes to work setting the table for four.

Kate steals glances at Drake as he moves from cupboard to table. As she watches him place each item carefully, she can't help but smile. He catches her watching him and winks back with a grin. Lorraine sees Kate blush and look away, shaking her head.

“Geez daughter of mine I haven't seen you blush over a boy since you were in high school. He must really be something.”

Kate grins at her mother, “Oh you have no idea. He's more than just something, he's everything.”

Lorraine laughs, “I used to think the same thing about your Dad, until he ran away with his young Brazilian intern. But look at you going and landing yourself a Duke.”

Kate tosses the vegetables in the bowl with a pair of tongs. “Well ….actually he married a Duchess. He was just a poor homeless shmuck before he met me.”

Drake protests with a laugh, “Hey I wasn't homeless.”

“If I had accepted Nicholas’ proposal I would have so totally kicked you out of the Palace,” Kate teases as she places the salad bowl on the table.

Drake slips an arm around her back, untying her apron strings. “Well then this poor shmuck is lucky you turned him down then. Otherwise taking that bullet to the arm was a total waste of time.”

Lorraine turns around and leans against the counter, her arms crossed. “Oh my goodness you two lead interesting lives don't you? Bullets, assassins, multiple proposals it's like you live in a movie or a novel.”

Kate laughs, “Well actually we do! One of our friends documented the whole thing. I'll have to send you a copy of his book.”

“Well I suppose that's one way to get caught up on what I've been missing. I saw you two on the cover of a magazine at the grocery store, and couldn't believe it. I so wish I could have been at the wedding. It's not everyday that your daughter gets married and becomes a National hero at the same time.”

“Actually to make sure it was extra official we got married twice,” Kate chuckles as Drake wraps her in a hug.

When the oven timer beeps Lorraine grabs her oven mitts and takes the tray of meatballs out of the oven.

“What do you mean twice? Oh never mind, I don't need to know.” Lorraine sighs, turning off the oven.

While Lorraine is busy at the stove, Drake slips his hand behind Kate's apron and places it on her belly. He leans in and whispers into her ear. “Should we tell her?”

Kate tips her head to the side and gives him a kiss. “Sssh, not yet.”

Turning around from the stove, Lorraine unties her own apron and sets it aside. “Ok you love birds, save the smooching and sweet nothings for later. Dinner's ready and as soon as Carol gets home we'll dish up. In the meantime I need to round up the cats and feed them too.”

Kate's eyes light up, “Ooh can I help? I want to meet the kitties.”

She pulls off her apron and tosses it at Drake. “Here hold this for me. Can we trust you all by yourself in the kitchen with all this food?”

Drake's stomach growls. Between all the delicious smells in the kitchen he wasn't so sure he could be trusted. He grins, pulling out his phone. “I make no promises. But I'll try to distract myself by checking in with Mara and giving her a situation report.”

Lorraine frowns at Kate as they exit the kitchen. “Who's Mara?”

Kate reaches out and touches her arm to reassure her, “My bodyguard. She's back in Seattle at the hotel. It was tough to convince her to stay behind today. But I promised her we'd check in regularly, and contact the local authorities if anything bad happened.”

Her mother nods, “Does Drake have a bodyguard too?”

Kate glances over her shoulder back toward the kitchen as they go down the hall, lowering her voice. “He does, but Drake is so used to looking after himself that he rarely sees the need to give him much work outside of Cordonia. He left Preston back in Valtoria with instructions to keep watch over the estate.”

Back in the kitchen, Drake leans against the counter and talks to Mara on the phone. In his other hand is the remainder of his chocolate donut.

“Everything is fine Mara, aside from some delinquent water fowl there hasn't been anything to worry about.”

On the other end of the line Mara sounds agitated and out of breath, evidently she's been pacing the room and waiting for his call. “I don't like it. I should be there to keep an eye on you and Kate. With all the added attention this Royal Heir business has brought upon you both we never know who we can trust.”

With a sigh Drake takes a bite of donut, “Well I'm pretty sure we're safe with Kate's mother. But if it'll make you feel better you can coordinate with the local authorities in Klamath Falls to be on alert in case we need assistance.” Damn what a mother hen she is. Surely this will give her something to do in our absence.

Mara's smile of relief is audible in her voice, “I'll get right on that Your Grace. Oh and at what hour should I expect you and the Duchess back at the hotel tonight?”

Drake chews on his lip hesitantly before answering, “Well considering the length of the drive and that we're just about to sit down for dinner, it's not likely we'll be back tonight.”

“But that's..that's unacceptable and a serious breach of protocol. I insist that you reconsider your decision to stay overnight Your Grace.”

Drake runs his hand through his hair in frustration, “I seriously don't see a problem Mara. There's no foreseeable threat. Just do as I asked and then get some sleep. We'll be back in the morning.”

Before she can protest further he hangs up.

Great. Now she's got me all nervous about being out here in buttfuck nowhere without backup. Thanks a lot.

Out in the backyard in the diminished light of early evening, a fox silently trots toward the poultry pen. Sniffing the air and with his tail held low he discerns no obvious threats. This wasn't his first visit. Poking his snout through the waffled metal fence, he clamps down on the metal wire with his teeth and tugs in an attempt to loosen it from the wooden frame. When it doesn't budge, he paws at the soft ground next to the fence instead and begins to dig a hole.

On the far side of the pen by the gate, Clem is resting with his face tucked under his wing. The sound of scratching jolts him out of his doze and he puffs out his feathers and opens his beak to hiss a warning. The fox stops digging and crouches low to begin wriggling under the fence. With a flap of his wings and a strangled hissing honk, Clem launches himself across the pen to attack the intruder. With gnashing teeth the fox fights back with a yip and a snarl. Clem flaps his wings and beats the fox around the head until he struggles his way back out of the hole. The fox shakes off the dirt from his fur and then sneezes before running away. Clem sees the hole as a new point of escape, ducking his head and attempting to fit under the fence. He only gets halfway through and gets stuck, one wing on either side of the fence. In his panicked state he starts flapping his wings and honking loudly.

In the kitchen the sudden commotion caused Drake to almost choke on the last bite of his donut. What the fuck is Clem up to now?

The headlights of Carol’s Jeep illuminate the front yard as she pulls into the driveway. As she parks next to Drake's rented black Lexus, she can't help but raise her eyebrows. Apparently the Duke and Duchess travel in style.

When she cuts the engine Clem’s loud honking meets her ears. Looking toward the house she's surprised to see a man in a white dress shirt and jeans come out through the screen door carrying a broom.

Well hello there handsome stranger, you must be Drake.

In the glaring flood of her headlights he raises a hand to shield his eyes. Oops sorry.

Shutting off her lights, Carol gets out of the Jeep. “Hi there. You must be Drake.”

Drake smiles, giving a slight nod. “Carol, I assume.”

Stepping forward, Carol sticks out her hand in greeting. Drake wipes his hand on his jeans and then accepts her handshake. Clem continues to honk loudly.

“I see you're armed. Is the darn goose causing problems again?” she laughs.

Drake looks down at the broom in his hand, “It seemed to do the trick earlier, so I figured why not.”

“Well I guess we need to identify the source of the problem then. I'll lead the way.” Carol says, stepping past Drake.

He makes an “after you" gesture with his arm and then falls in behind her. As they come around to the back of the house, the other feathered residents in the chicken coop are also raising a fuss. Carol checks the latch on Clem's pen and sees it still fastened.

“Ok well he didn't get out this way.”

Pointing with the handle of the broom in the dim light Drake says, “Nope, from the looks of things he's found another way. Or at least he tried.”

Clem has stopped struggling and is just laying there wedged and wailing.

“Now what?” Carol wonders.

“Well with his wings out like that he can't really move forward or backward. So we need to get him to fold up a wing and either back up or squeeze the rest of the way through.” Drake offers with a shrug.

“Ok then Sir Broomsalot, which end do you want to tackle? Cuz he's either gonna snap and hiss from the front, or blow shit all over you from the back.” Carol laughs.

“Well he's better off back in his pen than out of it. So I'll tackle him from the front. I have the broom for protection.” Drake says, apprehensively.

“You don't sound so sure about this plan.” Carol says, placing her hand on the top of the gate preparing to get in with Clem.

Drake walks around the enclosure to the opposite side. “Well I'd rather just whack the hell out of him until he pops through, but that's liable to break a wing or maim him in some other way.”

Carol chuckles, “That wouldn't hurt my feelings. But it wouldn't do him any good to die of an infection before we're ready to…you know.”

Drake looks down at the silly goose as he hisses and snaps at him. “Ok here's the plan. I’ll use the broom to deflect his head and neck back toward his body. Then I'll fold in his wing and then shove him back through. Can you grab him by the legs and pull?”

Carol laughs as she gets into the pen, “Ok, it's worth a shot. It wouldn't be the first time the damn bastard has shit on me.”

Drake nods, crouching down with the flat side of the broom as a shield in front of him, “Alrighty then, here goes.”

Clem honks and starts to flap his wings in protest as Drake presses the broom into the side of his face. But with his head and neck turned to the side he stops struggling. Drake braces the broom with his knee and then carefully folds in his wing the best he can. “Ok now pull.”

Sucking in a deep breath, Carol turns her head to the side and then yanks the goose by the legs and whips him off to the side. In a flurry of flapping and feathers, Clem tumbles across the pen and then rights himself again. With a flap of his wings and a shake of his head he seems to be more or less back to normal, save for a few lost feathers.

Drake drops back on his ass on the ground, laughing. Carol scrambles to her feet and gestures for Drake to help her up over the side of the pen. “Hey! Get off yer ass and help me outta here.”

“Oh right.” Drake rolls over and gets up. He sticks the broom down into the pen and Carol steps up on the side of it, and then scrambles over the side with his help.

Glancing around for something to block the hole, she points to a large plant pot nearby. “Can you lift that? Use it to block the hole for tonight?”

Drake frowns, sucking in a breath and then letting it out with a shrug. “Ok sure.”

Carol opens her mouth to offer to help, but then Drake squats and lifts the planter of flowers easily and places it next to the fence.

“Wow, brains and brawn. You're the complete package aren't you.” Carol chuckles.

“He sure is,” a voice says from behind them.

Carol and Drake turn to see Kate coming out of the backdoor. “Uh Carol, this is my wife Kate.” Drake says with a grin, wiping his hands on his jeans.

“Oh my goodness if you're not the spitting image of your mother!” Carol exclaims happily.

Kate nods and laughs, “Thanks, now if you two are done playing duck-duck-goose, why don't you come in for supper?”

Drake bows his head to Kate and gives her a wink and smile, “Yes ma'am.”

Continue to the next part

[lilyevansreyjakku]

Evermore

A reylo Victorian short story.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Warning it's long very long it's a feed back of Ben's past .

Hope y'all like it !forgive my spelling errors.

@michellestarswept @bellaren18 @lilia-ula @atchamberlin @corariley @glitzescape @grlie-girl @infinitelyblackrose @sushigirlali @nancylovesreylo @reylocalligraphy @buffshipper8490 @bunilicious @winglessone @reyloisblessed @angelic-hellraiser @shaara-2 @lastmouseleft @xtaketwox @magicaldogs @cleverpudding @princeofdarkness15 @black-eyed-suzannah-q @bisexual-dilemmas @thebadjediandthegoodsith @leofgyth @ohsnapcrackle @pandoraspocksao3 @reyloarmy @emrys-girlwithasaber @nite0wl29 @generaloftheneworder @reydarcy @empressdarkren @rakefiree @hotty-toddy-rebel-force @adamdoingthings @rebelrebelreylo @usethehorseluke

For those who haven't read part one of this story please do check out in the likin below 👇

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ben solo left home at the age of 15 years old after the incident with his uncle and his differences with his father . Ben discovers the dark secret that his mother had hidden from him all these years , In anger Ben  leaves his family and home , Ben join the first order under the commands of snoke . Ben goes by the name of kylo ren as well the master of the Knights of ren sending terror all around the cities and towns . after few years under the control of snoke kylo leaves the first order and goes into hiding .

later, Ben studies and  becomes a doctor who sometimes goes as volunteer in the frontline to nurse the wounded soldiers of the resistance .  one day the priest of Chandrila lor san tekka found him , the priest told him about his family and what had happened over the years . captain Han solo his father had fallen ill and his mother had aged wishing one thing that her son comes back home.

“ Ben “, the priest insisted.

“ no ! I'm not Ben here san tekka , I'm jace and no I'm not coming back home “.

“ do reconsider son your father is ill… he only has few months to live as your mother lady Leia needs you she isn't young like she was ,no doubt she is still the same strong and doesn't like to be seen old either but having your father ill has aged her and also not knowing about her son “.

Ben didn't say anything he couldn't he remembered when he use to play with his father and ran into the captain arms, he used to see Han riding his white horse falcon . Ben wanted to be like his father when he grew up .  just by thinking about it was already hurting too much .

“They lied to me !” , San tekka could hear anger in his voice but also pain.

“ I know son , I know what happened that night ! When you left but your a grown man now do leave pain and resentment aside son ! They need you do it at least for your mother who only did was to protect you from the truth! Which in the end cost her dearly she lost her son.” Ben turned to face the window the pain came back to him the memories his uncle who try to …

“ stop thinking about the past and think what is coming ahead son I have faith that you will come one day not the same no one is telling you to change but to come back to a home and find your mother who only wishes like any mother to see her son . Ben turned to say something but san tekka wasn't there anymore .

Lady Leia was looking at the window in her home in Chandrila in her husband's bedroom when one of her maids Bazine knocked .

“ my lady the priest is down stairs in the front hall waiting “.

“I'll be there in a few moments , thank you … do stay with the master while I go down stairs “ , Bazine Netal bow “Yes my lady “.

“ father san tekka !” , Leia ran to lor san tekka .

“How is he ?” Leia didn't say anything only stood silent .

“ Ben , I found him “ the priest said leia's eyes light up its was like life was given to her .

“ Ben ! My son Ben …. Where is he ? How is he ? I want see him “. Leia began to walk outside the priest stopped her .

“ my lady I didn't bring him with me he isn't a boy anymore , he is a grown man now he takes his own decisions”.

“ I want to see him , why he didn't come back ? I want to see him do tell me where is he !”.leia wanted to see her son she couldn't wait anymore .

“ you will see him again my lady just wait my lady “.

“ no ! I want to see him I want to hug him ask him so many things “.

“ I promise there will be time my lady he already knows about what's happening about Han and you “.leia just smiled and began to cry .

“ Ben “ , a breathless voice whispered in the room it was from the captain Han solo who still Delirious from a sickness “ son , don't go please !”. Leia was there doing anything,  what could she do ? The medicine didn't do anything anymore.

“ Han don't , don't use your strength “. Leia whispered to her husband while holding his hand . Lor san tekka only pray for a miracle to happen .

When one one of the maids bazine shouted ” the young master is here ! The young master is here !”  , lor san tekka went to the window and saw a young man on a black horse riding like the speed of light.

“ Ben “  leia smiled as she planted a kissed on top of her husband's hand . as Ben got off from his horse everything just stood still and silent .

Ben enter the mansion that once was his home it looked the same but old and  gloomy he walked towards the stairs when lady bazine one of the maids of the house and childhood friend she also changed beautiful indeed like always but not his taste.

“ sir “ , bazine bow to Ben who she hasn't seen in years , he looked handsome like the first day she came to the mansion with her father ,If only he knew .

“Bazine how are ?” , bazine smiled she felt excited to have him here in front of her  .

“Very well sir , may I take to your father's bedroom “.

“ Yes , please “ Ben follow her down the hall even thought it was day , a little bit of rey of light peak through the curtains.

Leia stood up Ben her son was here in front of her after 15 years, she slowly got up still not believing that her son was here in the room .leia took her son's face in her hand and caressed his cheek “ Ben ,my Ben “. Ben just stood there his mother was very old she doesn't look the same as the day he left her nor his father who now was dieing in his bed.

“ Ben, you came !” Leia embrace her son she didn't care if her son didn't love her ,  she was full of joy that her son was here after 15 years.

“ come “ , Leia pulled her son as they took few steps closer to Han's bed . lor san tekka study every step Ben  took , he knew that none of this was easy for the boy he just came back after so long and found his parents not the same older mother who had gone through difficult times and a father dying in his bed .  Ben didn't say anything not a word just shock and confusion was written all over the poor boy face’s .

The priest walked closer where Han was , he wasn't anymore the brave captain Ben knew once there was a old man dying in pain but stubborn to stay a little bit longer.

“ Han, your son is here , he came to see you“, lor san tekka whispered  Han just moan softly.

“ Ben” , it came out like a gasp of air. “My son is here ? Tell him to come “ . Leia pulled her son closer.

“ son , please do forgive me if I ever hurted you or treated you unfair . I was just protecting you from all…. pain son but seems  I was the one who was causing you pain .” Han cough and cough Leia whipped the sweat from Han's forehead .

“ take care of your mother and forgive her son “  han took his last breath he died peacefully leaving Leia heartbroken .

Han had left Ben as his only heir left him lands and a ranch . Ben didn't know what to do he just wanted to leave but couldn't . few days went by Han's funeral was calm and peaceful a lot of people had come from chandrila and takodana giving their consultants to his mother. He wasn't present for his father funeral he was locked in his father's office thinking what he was going to do .

Months went by Ben was preparing to go out off town leaving strict instructions to the maids to take care of his mother . "son where are you going? Please don't leave! " ,Leia panic , Ben saw this and started to explain " mother , please I'm going out no need to panic I'm going out of town I'm going through takodana and talk with the man who is in charge of the money of the business I checked the books and found something that I didn't like ."

"Just be careful son and come home ". Ben put his coat and left Leia in the stairs .

"I'll be back in the afternoon" .

Ben was walking through takodana when he saw her ..the "girl" she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen . she was slim ,tant skin she had freckles that kissed all over her skin brown eyes which reminded of him in spring. He stopped and stare at her . she must have been around teens or older he couldn't explain the feeling he was having with this girl . The young girl notice he stare at him in confused but shyness was written all over her face . the girl panic and disappear inside the gates is this her home ? where she lived ?

Ben whispered "who are you ?" , Ben was going to find out who was this girl the one who captured his heart .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Like always my antis and mean people no drama nor harassment no negative stuff . if it's not your type keep scrolling down and don't lose my time either . no drama✌🖤 peace .

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[punkscowardschampions]

Fraze & Bea

Fraze: Did you tell her no yet? Bea: No Bea: and hi, how are you, too Fraze: Clock's ticking, babe. You don't want me to do it for us Bea: You mean you don't want to do it either Bea: 'cos you know we should go Fraze: I don't wanna 'cause she'll kick off which will make me kick off but I will if you're not gonna, like Bea: Well yeah, and she'd be the one with a point to argue, not you Bea: it's what Christmas is all about Bea: we've got no valid excuse not to be there Fraze: I've got plenty of points, I've made 'em to you and I will to her as well if that's what it takes Fraze: Our family is right here, we don't need to drag the kids there to prove another fucking point entirely Bea: It isn't worth starting a row over, come on Fraze: You know I've started 'em for less, come on Bea: Well can you not, just this once Bea: it doesn't need to be any kind of drama Bea: it's barely longer than a standard car journey Bea: they'll be fine Fraze: Yeah 'cause that's the issue Fraze: Any kind of family thing is a drama Bea: We can't avoid them forever Bea: may as well get it over with when the distraction of Christmas is there Fraze: Fuck's sake Fraze: Alright, you've got a point Bea: I always do Bea: must be annoying Fraze: That ain't the word I'd use Bea: Spell it out so small ears don't pick it up Fraze: You know I'm shit at spelling that's just cruel, babe Bea: Exactly Bea: be fucked if I didn't know how to get you to be quiet by now Fraze: I'll be quiet as you like if it means they go to sleep for longer than an hour at a time Bea: I'm not a miracle worker Bea: contrary to popular belief Fraze: Shh, you had 'em all fooled Bea: Piss off Bea: How bad can it be, yeah Fraze: If your big plan is that you go back without me, you might wanna go back to the drawing board Fraze: Like you said, there's no chance of working actual miracles Bea: Neither that stupid nor that kind to you to be making a plan like that Bea: just saying, the worst has happened, can't give retroactive advice/contraception Bea: so everyone will just have to deal and make best Bea: us included Fraze: At least we waited 'til you'd finished school if not uni Fraze: They can still all give out plenty of unwanted advice though, that small mercy aside Fraze: Don't you wanna keep 'em at arms length a while longer? Bea: Oh yeah, let's make it a competition, that'll be fun Bea: it's just their job, not like you have ever listened so you don't have to start now Bea: I'm fine with going back, obviously Fraze: Comparisons are getting drawn like it or not, always have been Fraze: Same goes for judgements Bea: Not between family Bea: there's no need for that Fraze: Don't be naive, especially between family Fraze: Joe'll score points just for turning up, Tommo'll get a few more for making it to 18 without knocking anyone up Bea: Don't be a baby Bea: or expect me to apologize or feel bad for you that you won't be getting a pat on the back this year Fraze: I don't Fraze: But don't expect me to go along with your pretence of not giving a fuck what they think Fraze: I know you do Bea: I don't Fraze: You ain't gonna get the points awarded for keeping hold of me, those are all Ali's for that lad not doing whatever immediate runner my Ma reckoned on Bea: I literally just said I don't care Bea: do you think I have time for point scoring Fraze: And I just said I know you do Fraze: What else is there to go back for? Stay here if you don't give a shit Bea: You wanna stay here because you do Bea: so how does that make any sense Fraze: I give more of a shit about us, what doesn't make sense about that? Bea: What do you think is gonna happen Bea: seriously Fraze: Do you have time for their bullshit or don't you? Make up for your fucking mind Bea: I've got no time for avoidance Fraze: Well done you Bea: Jesus Bea: you're doing my head in now Fraze: What, you suddenly don't want my congrats? 'Cause it sounded like you were really angling for that Bea: I'm angling for you to grow a pair, actually Fraze: Doing what I'm told by you ain't what grow a pair means Bea: No but facing your mother is Fraze: Sitting down to Christmas dinner and playing nice ain't even close Bea: and staying here doing fuck all about it really proves our point Fraze: What do you want me to do, beg her forgiveness? I ain't sorry for any of it and I ain't gonna be just 'cause she is Bea: Then show up for your family and show her as much Fraze: Jesus, I'd hate you if I didn't love you so fucking much Bea: You better Fraze: Marry me, I'll prove it Bea: Shut up Fraze: Say yes and shut me up Bea: You're so stupid Fraze: I'm not that stupid Bea: I've not got the energy to debate Bea: already told you Fraze: Then don't Fraze: I'm telling you I ain't, take me at my word Bea: I'm not that stupid Bea: I don't take anyone at their word, don't take it personal Fraze: You're not stupid but you are funny Bea: Hilarious Bea: shame I can't say the same for you really Fraze: Stop holding onto it, Red, it's been years since I played class clown Bea: Yeah right Fraze: Yeah right Bea: not that long since you were still in uni Fraze: I weren't in the laughing mood then, was I? Bea: Well, who was Fraze: Every other fucker on my course basically Fraze: Nobody who matters Bea: I'm not sorry Fraze: Nor me Bea: Sure about that? Fraze: Meaning what? Bea: Meaning if you wanna go back and have the time of your life then go right ahead Fraze: If I went back I wouldn't have the time of my life just like I didn't the first time Bea: Alright Fraze: Is it? If you wanna have a dig at me for jacking it in now's the time, like Bea: That's not what this is Fraze: It can be, if you want Fraze: I'm making it easy enough for you Bea: That's easy for you Fraze: What? Bea: Easy for you to think I'm being a cunt about not finishing uni when I'm saying the opposite Bea: if that's what YOU actually want, then go ahead and do it Bea: I'm not going to be the one to decide for you either way Fraze: I was what I wanted so I did it, end of Fraze: It ain't your decision and I weren't asking you to make it Bea: So as I said, alright Fraze: Yeah Fraze: And like I said, you still get to have an opinion regardless Bea: What, like I'm bothered? Bea: it's not the be-all-end-all Bea: you still have a plan Fraze: 'Course I do Fraze: I'm not a fucking amateur, or as much of an idiot as you like to reckon Bea: I don't reckon anything of the sort, moron Bea: I'm saying I know Fraze: Obviously, you know whatever's worth knowing, always have done Bea: Too right Fraze: So if you wanna go, we'll go Bea: We're going Bea: it wasn't ever up for discussion but glad to have you on board Fraze: You do make me laugh, babe Bea: Hilarious, I remember Fraze: Good, don't forget Fraze: You're gonna need that sense of humour when we get there Bea: You're so dramatic, honestly Fraze: You're so in love with me, take a deep breath, honestly Bea: Yeah, you're 2 months too late to tell me to breathe, dickhead Fraze: Well, they were 3 months too early for me to need to Bea: You could've, I wouldn't have heard you to be pissed off Fraze: Now you tell me, cheers Bea: Some of us were a little busy at the time Fraze: Don't worry, next time I'll properly take the chance to say whatever I like Bea: Were you even there or? Bea: what next time Fraze: I'm just saying, we once said there wasn't gonna be any time Fraze: Didn't stick to that, did we? Bea: 1. It was an accident Bea: 2. Once is enough thanks Fraze: I'm not trying to argue otherwise, like Fraze: I was there Bea: You literally were, oh my God Fraze: Yeah, reckon I said that a fair few times myself there and then Fraze: Not that God showed up Bea: Don't imagine he's any good with a scalpel anyway Fraze: Not good at fuck all but voyeurism by all accounts Bea: and plagues, give him credit Fraze: Yeah, those locusts really boss, like Bea: Exactly Fraze: You gonna support me if I go study religion then? Bea: I will Bea: but your dad? no way, like Fraze: Fuck him, never gonna be his fave anyway Fraze: Gotta be born a girl for that Bea: Poor baby Fraze: Not for long, Red, stick around for the riches Bea: Where do you think I'm going? Fraze: Anywhere you want Bea: My question still stands then Fraze: I've told you loads of times before, the world is ours, babe Fraze: and now there's 2 more of us Fraze: The only question is what do you want Bea: You Bea: Us Bea: that's all I want right now Fraze: I see that and raise you no more holidays that are in a fucking caravan Fraze: Winter ain't gonna last forever and just 'cause I let you talk me into going back there for Christmas, don't think I'm agreeing to that bullshit Bea: I don't think anyone is going to even suggest we can all fit into a caravan anymore Fraze: Do you wanna make that bet though? Fraze: If my kids never see the inside of a caravan I'll go to my grave less begrudgingly Bea: You're such a snob, babe Fraze: They're having the best of everything, no less, whatever it takes Fraze: And that ain't even close, simple as Bea: Don't need to tell me like I don't know the score Fraze: I'm just saying, my Ma can make all the comparisons she wants, we're not them and it's not gonna be like that Bea: It's different for you than it is me Fraze: I know Bea: But it'll be good different for them, that we can agree on Fraze: 'Course Bea: I'll start packing then Fraze: I'll be back to give you a hand soon Bea: Not that hard Bea: get used to having a massive bag full of nappies and bottles and spare clothes on you at all times Fraze: Maybe not the suitcases but the babies we can't just shove in there and zip up, slightly more work, like Fraze: Have you already wrapped everyone's shit or should I just throw it in a gift bag? Bea: They aren't getting their own seats so you will have to hold one of 'em, yeah Bea: and you really think I didn't get it all posted there Bea: not an amateur Fraze: Alright but if you didn't get Joe an even itchier jumper than last year I'm reconsidering this whole marriage thing Bea: Thanks for the tip Bea: I'll have to reconsider my gift, obviously Fraze: Shut up Fraze: Me too now I'm sending the ring back Bea: Ha ha Fraze: You can laugh the personalised engraving has fucked my refund chances right up Bea: Well that was your first mistake Bea: can't reuse it on another girl either Bea: rookie Fraze: Write me a list when you can find the time, babe Bea: Easy Fraze: Good Bea: You know you have to be nice to your sister when we're there Fraze: Do I fuck Fraze: You be nice to yours Bea: My sister didn't have a baby a few weeks ago Fraze: So what? Fraze: You'd kill her if she fucking did Bea: So what is she doesn't need drama from you right now Fraze: She ain't getting drama from me but she ain't getting a round of applause either Bea: I'm not saying you have to go that far am I Bea: just don't start either Fraze: You're saying keep my mouth shut but I'm saying why the fuck should I? Fraze: A supposedly high IQ and a boyfriend who supposedly ain't an utter waste of space don't change the fact she's still a kid Bea: Because what do you think it will achieve? Bea: Literally nothing Bea: you'll only make it worse, if anything, so save your breath Fraze: Instead you want me to sit back and do literally nothing Bea: Whatever, be the big brother you want to be Bea: I'm not getting involved Fraze: This is why we shouldn't go Fraze: It's bullshit Bea: What do you propose, you never see her again because it makes you feel weird Bea: Get real Fraze: Yeah 'cause what you're proposing is so much better Fraze: We all just pretend everything is fucking fine when it isn't Bea: You can't do anything about it Bea: it's her life to fuck up however she pleases, she weren't going to ask for your permission at any point, like Fraze: I can't do anything about any of 'em that's the whole point Bea: Yeah Bea: that's always been the case and always will be Fraze: Exactly Fraze: Why would I wanna sit there and act like I don't know that? Bea: 'cos that's life Bea: it's the same for everybody else Fraze: I hope one of 'em somewhere is having a convo about what a fuck up I am Fraze: God, if you're listening, like, come on Bea: Really? Fraze: Don't let me down, Ma Fraze: 'Cause if they think this is as good as everything gets and everything really is fine for this family then fucking hell Bea: This is news? Bea: Mediocrity is aspirational to most people Bea: if everyone was the best it'd be meaningless and we'd have nothing to do in the meantime Fraze: Cheers, babe Fraze: I wouldn't want anyone else in my corner Bea: Don't be disingenuous when you really mean it Fraze: I don't talk like you swallowed a dictionary at me when I'm declaring my love Bea: That's what that was? Bea: You should work on that Fraze: I won't put it exactly like that in the vows Fraze: You saved me, you know, that's how I know it's something that can happen Fraze: I don't wanna just leave 'em to it but I can't do the same for 'em either Bea: I know Bea: it's a fool's errand Bea: but a noble one Fraze: I hate feeling like such a stupid cunt Bea: I know that too Bea: kinda signed up for a lifetime of it though Bea: not saying I'm so smart, before you suggest Fraze: I'll say it for you Fraze: 'Cause you are Bea: Hmm Bea: thanks Fraze: It don't even feel like a compliment anymore 'cause it's just been like that, something I've known, since the first time I met you Bea: Don't be soppy Bea: I'm meant to be the hormonal one, you'll set me off Fraze: You want me to be nice to everyone but you? Fuck that Bea: 'Course not Bea: we're a team Fraze: We better be 'cause they want us to stay til after New Year's Bea: We always have been Fraze: Yeah Fraze: I ain't forgotten Bea: Should hope not Fraze: I'm so knackered I feel braindead right now but I reckon it's actually semi functioning Fraze: Take that kids Bea: That's something Bea: need all the funds we can get now Fraze: How are you? Bea: Now he asks Bea: fine, of course Bea: he's being grizzly but nothing I can't handle Fraze: Put up with me long enough, yeah? I know you wanna say it Bea: Now you mention it, like Fraze: Do you need me to grab anything on the way back? Bea: something to eat if you're planning on it tonight Fraze: Don't tell either of 'em it's part of the plan, like Fraze: Might get a second then Bea: You reckon they've already got malicious intent Fraze: I ain't ruling it out Bea: They are yours, after-all Fraze: They better be Bea: As if Fraze: Too early to tell if they look like me Bea: Do you want me on your side or not Bea: think on Fraze: I ain't surviving Christmas if you ain't Fraze: So depends if you want me to or not Bea: That depends if you wanna keep implying things Fraze: Come on Bea: You Fraze: If I reckoned there was any truth to it we wouldn't be having this conversation Fraze: You know that as well as I do Bea: Not very supportive Bea: but fair Fraze: I love you but I've got my limits, babe and I don't reckon they stretch to doing night feeds for kids that ain't mine Bea: Always good to know Fraze: Keep it in mind, yeah Bea: Back at you Fraze: Fuck that, I need your genetics to balance out mine Fraze: Especially now the model missus of my childhood dreams ain't gonna happen Fraze: No wildcards, cheers Bea: Please, don't let me stop you Fraze: Shut up Bea: Go on Bea: I said no Bea: practically a free agent Fraze: I'd rather you said no every time than some girl I don't want saying yeah Bea: Cute Fraze: Don't take the piss Bea: Me? Never Bea: You're just so adorable, babe Fraze: Tis the season for you to have a day off it, like Bea: Don't make me repeat myself Fraze: Why not? Fraze: You've signed yourself up to a lifetime of that Bea: They're all we've got to talk about already? Fraze: Christ, I hope not Bea: Let's never be those people, yeah Bea: another rule Fraze: I don't mind that one Fraze: I'll even swear to it Bea: No need to spill blood on it Bea: but good Fraze: No takebacks either way Bea: Yeah Fraze: Good Bea: How long have you got left? Bea: need interaction with an actual adult human Fraze: One foot out the door, babe Bea: Thank God Fraze: My sentiments exactly Bea: I have missed you Fraze: Yeah? Bea: You know I have Fraze: I know it's more fun hearing it from you Bea: Well I have Bea: can't claim the babies have too but you know Bea: they're selfish little bastards Fraze: It's alright we've established they're mine, you ain't gotta milk it Bea: 😂 Fraze: I've missed you Fraze: Them too Bea: It must be weird being away from them Fraze: It's fucked but I'm on my way back via the shop Bea: You don't really mind though, do you? Fraze: Like you said, we need all the funds we can get Fraze: Gotta do what I gotta do Fraze: They need you more than they do me right now Bea: Yeah Bea: and there's only so much time I can give them too Fraze: Exactly Fraze: What about you, do you mind? Bea: I don't know Bea: it is what it is regardless, like you said Fraze: Yeah, but if there's anything you wanna do different we'll figure it out Bea: I need to finish Uni Bea: I'm going to be there for a long time yet Bea: we can do it Fraze: 'Course you do and 'course we can Bea: I can take until Summer term, doing long distance Bea: but then I'll need to go back full-time Bea: still the plan, they'll nearly be a year Fraze: It's still a good plan Bea: I think so Fraze: No need to repeat myself going on about how smart you are then Bea: Still, always fun hearing it from you Fraze: Still, I've got other compliments up my sleeve Bea: Only if you're lying Bea: I wonder if the gym creche will take them this young Fraze: You can always lie about how old they are if not Fraze: Every fucker knows twins are smaller Bea: Especially ones that can't hold on Fraze: Go easy though, yeah? Bea: I'm not pregnant now Fraze: You know what I mean Fraze: It ain't been that long Bea: Long enough Fraze: Come on Bea: Don't be a baby about it Fraze: Don't be a bitch about it Bea: Shut up and come home Fraze: Shut up and listen to me Bea: Don't treat me like an idiot Fraze: Don't treat me like an idiot either Bea: I'm not Fraze: Bullshit Fraze: I know you and you should know I ain't gonna stand there while you go fucking mental over this Bea: It isn't mental to want to look good Fraze: Nah it ain't but you do Bea: If that were true you would've said it however many messages up so Fraze: If I'd said it however many messages ago you'd have said that you wanna get out of the house or whatever Fraze: I ain't telling you not to go I'm telling you not to go mad Bea: Not planning on becoming a bodybuilder, like Fraze: That ain't what worries me, like Bea: Don't worry Bea: I promise, I'll be fine Fraze: You know the drill by now, Bea Bea: Come on Bea: I'm not my sister Fraze: Your sister ain't my problem, you are Bea: Charming Fraze: A charm offensive ain't gonna get through to you Bea: Calling me a problem ain't gonna get you anything you want Fraze: Come on Fraze: I'm saying I don't care about your sister, I care about you Bea: and I'm saying you're making a non-issue an issue right now Fraze: Alright Bea: Is it? Fraze: If you say so, babe Fraze: I ain't calling you a liar Bea: Good Bea: Don't worry about me okay Bea: We have so much more important things to focus on Fraze: Fuck that, there's nobody more important than you Bea: I think you're legally obligated to say otherwise now Fraze: I wouldn't have them if it weren't for you Fraze: I wouldn't even be here if it weren't for you Fraze: It ain't nothing you don't already know Bea: Babe Fraze: I'll shut up now Bea: You know it's more than mutual, don't you Bea: You and me, always, no matter what Fraze: Yeah Bea: I mean it now Bea: no bullshit trial separation stuff again Fraze: I don't wanna be away from you when I have to be working, you ain't getting rid now that I'm on my way back Bea: I don't want rid Bea: never did Fraze: And it goes without saying how fucking beautiful you look but if you need to hear it you will Bea: I'm not desperate or asking for constant reassurance Bea: I'm not that girl Fraze: I know who you are Bea: Yeah Bea: It's just a lot Bea: I wanna feel more like me again Fraze: What else can I do? Bea: There's nothing else you need to do Bea: honest Fraze: But I still wanna Fraze: I'll look after 'em so you can go to the gym or wherever else Bea: I'd rather see you first Fraze: It don't have to be now, the offer stands Bea: Thanks Bea: seriously Fraze: You'd do it for me Fraze: We're a team, you said it Bea: I love you Fraze: Yeah, I know Fraze: I love you too Bea: Hurry up now though Fraze: We need to eat, babe Fraze: I've already pushed to the front of this queue Bea: Damn Bea: when he's a provider Fraze: When ain't I been? Used to provide you with drinks when we were kids, like Bea: It wasn't always you, thank you Fraze: You had your moments, cheers for each one Bea: How dare you Bea: it was a solid 50/50 Fraze: That ain't how I remember it Bea: Convienient Bea: you can't remember a lot of things Fraze: It really weren't at the time but it was worth it to impress you, I remember that Bea: I was not that impressed Fraze: Bullshit Bea: Not bullshit Bea: shut up Fraze: I'm getting in the car, you shut up Bea: Oh yeah, blame me if you crash Bea: that's nice Fraze: It'll be your fault Fraze: And my life insurance ain't all that either so you might wanna think on Bea: 😑 Bea: Go away then Fraze: See you soon then Bea: 💘 Fraze: You're gonna do better than that when I come through the door, yeah? Bea: Focus Bea: I'm NOT making you crash, remember Fraze: You're gonna make me do another detour if you don't say yeah Bea: Really Fraze: Alright no, I'm too tired to be fucking about but humour me, like Fraze: I wanna feel more like me too, and we both know who that cunt is Bea: I happen to like that cunt Fraze: Marry him then Bea: Ha ha Fraze: Pour me a drink, babe Bea: Watch me put it in a bottle Bea: 🍼 Fraze: I'll take what I can get, including those measures Bea: You ain't getting 8oz Bea: but nice try Fraze: That's only my first try Fraze: We'll see Bea: You will, babe Fraze: Nice try yourself Bea: Shut up or I'll start without you Fraze: Are you making that a promise or a threat? Bea: Keep me waiting and find out Fraze: [honey he's home cos honestly shh but we all know its a swag entrance cos he's really missed and loves them all] Bea: [renuinted and it feels so good] Fraze: [just kissing like they in a film casually instead of being two young harassed parents, have your moment babes] Bea: [live your best life lads 'cos the struggle is real] Fraze: [hence him coming in from the rain for that semi throwback cos yolo]

[cheshirehunshine]

okay here's the thing i've never told anybody and im so happy that i found someone to talk about it rn. well i lost my virginity like a month ago with my bf and i'm so regretful because of what i've done. i think i didn't wait the right time (im 18) and the right person. I always thought that losing virginity is something special and i was expecting something like in the movies but mine wasn't that special at all, it happened so randomly. (i'll send the second part)

part2: and also i can’t look at the same way to my bf right now. he knew that it was my first and he didn’t do anything to make it speacial. i really love him but i understood that he’s not a mature guy to be with. (he’s 18 too) and we fight A LOT. when we fight i’m blaming myself about letting him take my virginity. i’m also freaking out about slut shaming. that’s mostly because of my religion and all my friends are virgins. i’m just very sad and don’t know what to do :( that’s all..

Hello my love, I’m glad you could talk about it with me and I’ll do my best to make you feel better. Listen, what’s done it’s done and there’s no point on looking back and keep feeling bad about it. Imo, people give too much importance to losing their virginity and the truth is that as long as you do it consciously and you feel comfortable about it, it doesn’t matter that much if you don’t do it with the love of your life. Most people don’t spend their lives with the person their lose their virginity with! Also, don’t ever compare real life with movies, their are scripted stories that are usually overreacted to make them more interesting. Don’t regret what you’ve done, cause you did it wanting to and with someone you knew very well. Don’t blame yourself and don’t blame your bf either, because there’s nothing to blame about. And why are you afraid of slut shaming? Every person is free to do with their sexual life whatever they want, so please don’t ever let anyone make you feel bad because of the decisions you’ve made. You have your own valid reasons to do with your intimacy what you want and no one should pry into your private life! I promise you that you’ve done nothing wrong babe. And don’t compare yourself with your friends, you are unique and if you do things differently doesn’t mean you’re doing them wrong. And I think you should reconsider staying in this relationship if you’re feeling that way about your bf.. do you really love him? Do you think you have a future together, that you can solve your differences and stop fighting that much?

ANONYMOUSLY TELL ME A SECRET.

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Nancy

Rio: If you wanna head home 'fore nan and granddad are ready, you can always have a lift back with us Nancy: Thanks Nancy: I'm in no rush though Rio: Having a good time then? Nancy: Sure Nancy: It's not a classroom, I'll take it Rio: Yeah, I bet you're buzzing Nancy: You mean you can't tell? Well, that's devastating Nancy: I reckoned on it being so obvious, like Rio: I mean, your poker face ain't all that, babe, if you wanna be real about it Nancy: More of a resting bitch, I know Nancy: The good news must not have sunk in yet Rio: Give it a few Nancy: Yeah Rio: Anyway, can't do anything about it now Rio: May as well enjoy your summer Nancy: Like I said, I already am Nancy: Aside from the prospect of going home Rio: 👍 Rio: How bad can it be Rio: he's taken one for the team Nancy: No, he's made sure exams mean more than they did before Nancy: and made me the focus since he's a less than safe convo topic Rio: Well, your family's inability to communicate is longstanding and not my fault so I'm not gonna take the blame for it, nor is my baby Rio: Sorry, like Nancy: I didn't ask Nancy: It's not my fault that his fall from grace makes me their poster child for success now either, I definitely never asked for that Rio: If you're going to feel so sorry for yourself, don't be surprised when people feel it for you in return Rio: Oddly enough our decision to have a child wasn't exactly about you Nancy: I'm only surprised the pity party isn't full already Nancy: My brother tends to take up a lot of space Rio: Please Rio: We've got no reason to be sorry, either definition Rio: we're happy, if you lot wanna be miserable then the party is all yours Nancy: Does he know that? Does he feel it? 'Cause he sounded like he wanted me to be sorry for him many times over when we last spoke Rio: Like I said, you're all crap at communicating Rio: but thanks Nancy: Yeah, and he's one of the worst Nancy: If I feel sorry for anything, it's for you, for that much, like Rio: Fuck off Rio: I don't need your pity Nancy: Don't tell me to fuck off Rio: Why not? You've seen fit to talk to me how you please Nancy: 'Cause you're judging my communication skills like its your job, for one thing Nancy: And for another, I haven't said anything like that to you, ever Rio: You said in as few words as possible that you don't think Buster really wants our baby, implying that I don't know him and we don't talk, whilst you were at it Rio: but no Rio: the f bomb in response, so much worse, Jesus Nancy: No I haven't Nancy: All I've said to him is that his timing is ridiculous and when was the last time we even spoke, me and you? Before exams probably so Rio: What does it matter to you, or your parents for that matter Rio: He's still going to Uni, he's still doing everything they want Nancy: I don't care what they want Nancy: I care about him and how hard it's gonna be Nancy: I won't be here to help either of you, not even in the same country, so excuse me for being worried Rio: When ain't life? Rio: You can't let that stop you from doing what you want Nancy: You don't need to make it harder on yourself, Jesus Rio: Well that ain't how it's going to be, or how we see it Nancy: It's easy for him to see it that way when he never admits that he needs help or that anything could possibly be a struggle in the slightest Nancy: He's just perfect and everything will be, end of story Rio: I help him Rio: and I know that, I knew that before this even started Nancy: I know you do and you know I love you, yeah? I'm not saying this to be a bitch to you Rio: I know Rio: but I don't get why you can't translate your worry into supporting him, that is literally all he needs from you Rio: instead of the constant barage of questions Nancy: because I'm scared for him and he scares me Nancy: how little he thinks about anything Nancy: He just wants and he gets and I'm the only one who cares if it'll work out or not Nancy: you know that's what he's always been like Rio: It's going to work out Rio: even if you wanna talk worst case scenarios, we have to get divorced, yeah Rio: he'll still have the kid, I'm not that bitch Nancy: I hope it does Nancy: Genuinely Nancy: You know that Rio: I think I do Rio: but you don't always show it Rio: I know it's a lot Rio: but it's hard for him when none of you seem happy for him or even say it's alright, like Rio: why do you think he can't admit he needs help, when has he got it? Nancy: Do you? 'Cause when you got together I had to re-evaluate everything I thought I knew about him and you Nancy: He says he's loved you since he was a kid, I was there, I have almost the same memories Nancy: But I don't Nancy: at all Rio: Why does it matter? We were all kids Nancy: 'Cause all this time he was so unhappy and I didn't know, okay Nancy: I didn't do anything Rio: None of us did Rio: He didn't want you to know, anyone Rio: you can't take blame for it like you wilfully ignored cries for help but he's trying now Rio: he needs you now, okay Nancy: I'm trying too Nancy: I just Nancy: I don't know him, if I ever did Nancy: How am I meant to know what to do? Rio: You did Rio: You were close then, just because you didn't know this one thing doesn't mean you weren't Rio: You wouldn't tell him about every crush you had, especially if you felt shame about being gay or there was another reason you knew he could judge you for it, you know? Rio: Just, try and be nice to each other, simple and as stupid as it sounds Rio: that's all you gotta do in this world though Nancy: You can say wanting to fuck my teacher, that's pretty shameful, babe Nancy: Lord, did you really have to do the one thing that scares me most to test me Nancy: Babies are terrifying Rio: Well you know, I assume you weren't child thirsting after your reception teacher like 👌👌👌 nice cardigan miss Rio: Nah Rio: they're just people Rio: I guess that's kinda the problem though Nancy: Hey, she was cute! And very attentive Nancy: Well, not to be dramatic and turn this into a therapy session but the last time I was properly excited for a baby to be born, he died Nancy: And now we don't talk about him Rio: That isn't going to happen again Rio: and you could talk to Buster about him Rio: he's thinking about him too Nancy: Does he talk about him to you? Rio: Yeah, a little Rio: we're going to give the baby his name as a middle Nancy: Really? Rio: I should say we don't know it's a boy yet, we just think it is Rio: but I won't say 'if not, the next one' and freak you out further, like Nancy: Go ahead, I'm just out here openly crying at the beach Rio: I'm sorry Rio: you can use my ugly dress as a hankie if you wanna Nancy: It's not that bad Rio: It's years old 'cos everything I own now would leave no need to announce this Rio: tempting but probably not Nancy: You should have come to me, my wardrobe runneth over Nancy: Literally, I need to have such a huge clear out before uni starts Rio: You planning to reinvent yourself as a minimalist? 😏 Rio: local charity shops gonna be a goldmine, like Nancy: Reinvent myself, yeah, as that, no Nancy: I get it, not tempting to come over when I'm being a bitch Nancy: I'm sorry you have to suffer that dress as a result, babe Rio: Well you know, or we could say I was giving you space and time Rio: politer Rio: I'm not even sure it was ever mine Rio: maybe it was yours, the ultimately bitchery to get it out of my system Nancy: Not to be that bitch or lesbian stereotype, okay, but what's under it? Can you not just remove it now the secret's out? Nancy: Be you again Rio: 😂 Rio: Still got it, babe Rio: I guess I can now Rio: It's weird Nancy: Do it for my brother if not me Nancy: You think I need to sort my face, look at his right now Rio: Poor boy Rio: at least I didn't straighten my hair, then he'd really be devastated Nancy: 😂 Nancy: I wish you had, I'd have taken so many pics to post and tag him in Rio: 😏 Pure evil, like Nancy: Genetically, sorry Nancy: Not saying you should watch The Omen again or anything but Rio: 😲 How rude Rio: but if I remember correctly that fucker was adopted so it would've been more cutting to come at me with Rosemary's Baby, like Rio: slacking Nancy: Oops, horror movies not really my forte Rio: You should reconsider Rio: yeah the bitch always dies, but she's usually half-naked beforehand, like Nancy: Are you gonna put your arm around me when it gets scary though? I think not Rio: You know I would you just ain't vibing 💔 Nancy: Lies! I just told you to strip Rio: True enough Rio: There's hope yet then Nancy: I'm sorry for being a bitch this whole time Nancy: I've missed you, it feels like exams lasted years Rio: I know, it was stressful and I weren't even taking them so God knows how you lot survived Rio: How do you feel about them, genuinely? Nancy: I know you love him, but how much of a prick was he during his, like 1-10? To make me feel better Nancy: I feel bad but like, I always do about that stuff so Nancy: It doesn't mean anything Rio: Oh, 11, for sure 😏 Rio: no, it was hard though, he was stressed as fuck Rio: you'll have done what you needed to do, I know Nancy: At least you could play the pregnancy card, like DO NOT STRESS ME, BOY Nancy: I basically had to shut myself away to get the same effect Rio: I feel it, Junior looks like this is his first time seeing sunlight in years, he hasn't taken his sunglasses off Rio: know they're prescription but come on Rio: as for the pregnancy card, great for getting out of arguments you've probably caused being a crazy bitch, like Nancy: I don't think he remembers who any of us are 😂 Nancy: It's not too late to have some actual fun today, is it? Nancy: You need it too, Buster said you've been pretty sick Nancy: He's dramatic, but still Rio: Of course not Rio: Someone suggested going to the pub to celebrate but as I'm the one with the baby I can make sure they choose somewhere nice with a decent cocktail list and beer garden, not a grotty old man pub, like Rio: Just morning sickness but it was pretty shitty and lonely when he was at School and so was Indie Rio: but fingers crossed I'm over that now so Nancy: We have to do something about that dress first Nancy: Come with me before we go anywhere else Nancy: I will save you Rio: 🙌 Rio: If you take me near a maternity section, we will brawl Nancy: God no Nancy: I'd burst into flames Rio: 😂 Rio: You remembered suncream today though, yeah? Nancy: Yes, mum Nancy: Maternity clothes are actually disgusting and I'm not letting it happen to you Nancy: Or my niece or nephew, how embarrassing to look back on Rio: It's just not necessary either Rio: do you know how big most clothes go these days like Nancy: Thank you! Like be more creative than that Nancy: If you wear a smock I'm disowning you Nancy: I don't care if you're having twins in a heatwave Rio: You'll be glad to know it ain't, unless one of them was hiding real stealth, but I'd be much bigger, pretty sure Nancy: Yeah, you'd need more than that dress to hide behind, right? Mum was such a ridiculous size with us, the pics are actually like something out of a scary movie Nancy: Say what you like about her, and do, but she always looked good Rio: Honestly, poor bitch Rio: Feel her small girl pain in a way you can never Rio: feeling like a human ball some days and it is just the one Nancy: Why do you think I'm not taking you to a maternity section, they'd think I was the one with a baby on board Nancy: No offense but kill me Rio: Oh bitch no Rio: like, is daddy excited or terrified, Nance? Rio: straight girl bants Nancy: I nearly threw up in my mouth Nancy: Not morning sickness, sorry lads Rio: You keep down your breakfast if you getting in my car, thank you very much Nancy: Such a mum 😏