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preeshera · 6 years

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If Love Be Blind (Chapter 2)

Angsty multi-chapter love square monstrosity (you have been warned)

(Chapter 1) (read on AO3) (I owe my life to my lovely beta Bell)

‘Marinette's life is slipping through her fingertips, all the dreams and plans she made for herself shattered, as she falls deeper and deeper into misery.

What happened to Ladybug's famous luck?

And could there be a way to bring it back? ... a certain black cat, perhaps? Only time will tell.’ (It was his hand that turned her world to ashes, but he must never know)

“Master I can’t.” Marinette sobbed. “I can’t see…”

----

Marinette’s hands trembled around the teacup as a faintly spoken chant came in from the next room over. She didn’t know how long it has been since she came crashing into the shop. She didn’t know if Tikki was okay. Or Chat. Or Alya. Or Paris.

The only thing she could focus on was that she couldn’t see.

Her phone had buzzed a while ago. Mari had moved to pick it up out of habit and check who was calling but then it hit her – she couldn’t see the caller ID. She couldn’t see anything. She was completely blind.

She’d been sobbing ever since she had come inside. The salty tears hurt as they spilled from her ruined eyes, but she couldn’t stop them if she tried.

“Marinette?” Master Fu’s voice carried towards her, and she turned his direction instinctively.

“Is-is Tikki going to be okay?” she hiccupped as she tried to wipe her tears, but touching her eyes hurt so badly a fresh stream erupted from them, and horrified, Marinette realized she could taste blood on her tongue. Ever the master of compartmentalization she pushed all the thoughts of blood aside and pushed on.

“Did you-er-could you help her?”

“Yes, Marinette, Tikki is going to be fine – she is just eating now. Once she’s finished, her energy should be back up. My healing tonic really did work wonders, I must say, but you… What is it child?”

He must have noticed her expression, but Mari gulped down her tears and pushed her chin up. “Paris needs me, and I failed. What kind of Ladybug does that?” Her lips quivered, but she tried not to cry again.

”That’s not true Marinette; you were incredibly brave! I am so proud of you.“ A squeaky voice came flying closer to her and suddenly she could feel softness on her cheek.

“Tikki,” Mari sighed, “you’re alive!”

”Of course, silly!“ Tikki giggled.Then suddenly the softness was gone and a small gasp escape the kwami, making Marinette’s blood run cold.

“What is it? Tikki?!”

“Marinette, your eyes! You’re hurt! Oh no, this is terrible!”

You think? Mari thought bitterly, but said nothing. “Tikki, there’s no time to worry about me. Can you transform? We have to go back and finish the akuma. Paris needs us!”

Marinette couldn’t see Master Fu’s worried look, nor Tikki’s determined nod.

“Let’s not keep them waiting.“ The tiny kwami sounded so resolute Marinette couldn’t help but feel a little bit hopeful.

“Tikki, spots on!”

She felt the miraculous power settle around her, and as she opened her eyes, she almost whooped with joy – her sight has returned!

Mari gave the old Master a respectful nod and tore out of the shop without a word. She grabbed her yo-yo and quickly checked the Ladyblog for updates – Alya, at least, must have still been okay for the update livestream was online. Marinette sighed with relief.

“Citizens of Paris, oh fuck” Alya spoke from the recording on the small screen, stopping short to dodge a piece of flying debris before she plowed on, “stay inside and find shelter! Steer clear of Avenue Paul Doumer and Trocadero. I repeat, do not go towards Trocadero. There is a large akuma attack and-”

The feed cut off, but at least now Mari knew where she needed to go. She couldn’t help the elation she felt at being Ladybug again, moving freely from rooftop to rooftop. But the good feeling left her in an instant when she saw the destruction all around her. She realized the akuma must have ordered its mind-controlled minions on a rampage through the streets. There were upturned cars, broken store windows, and rubble everywhere. When she finally made it back to the small square where the attack first started, she gasped.

Screaming. People running around frantically. Small fires starting up, with no one to put them down. The police and fire department were struggling to keep Chat Noir at bay, succeeding for the moment, but just barely. Realization dawned on Marinette with growing dread – Chat still hadn’t de-transformed! Which must mean the akuma’s influence was somehow powering him. He roared and trashed in the middle of the square, like rabid feral monster, and even as Ladybug, she shook with dread.

Meanwhile the few remaining civilians bolstered together under Principal Damocles, for some strange reason, were using all they could to distract Dr. Mind Control.

“Ladybug!”

“Look, it’s Ladybug!”

“She’s okay!”

“She made it”

“We’re saved!”

Marinette wanted to scream. No, they weren’t saved! What could she do to help them, when she failed so badly already?!

“Ladybug, I am so happy you‘reokay!” Alya was right there beside her when she landed down on the broken tile pavement.

“Yes, I…” she could feel tears prickling the corners of her eyes again, but her friend gave her the sunniest smile and said “Ladybug, I trust you. You can do it. We’ll distract them both for you as much as we can.”

Mr. Damocles nodded, and as Mari looked around she saw more and more hurt and sooty people, uniformed and not, giving her reassuring looks and nods.

She could do this. She had to. The city of Paris believed in her.

The city of Paris needed her.

“Lucky Charm!”

It went suspiciously smoothly from then on. Effortless. It almost felt natural to use the red-and-black spotted Velcro strip, to tie it around her yo-yo and drag the akuma to the ground. It was all too easy to swiftly grab the doctor’s notepad and tear it to pieces. Perfectly ordinary to just purify the akuma.

However, when she threw the Velcro in the air and shouted, “Miraculous Ladybug!” she knew in an instant that something was wrong.

The usually powerful magic only sparked and sputtered, barely de-transforming the akuma and his victims, fixing a mere fraction of damage and injuries before fizzling out into nothing.

Her earrings beeped once, then twice, way too fast, and she was running before she could meet Chat Noir’s confused green gaze. Alya yelled after her, but she had already gone.

Ladybug came into Master Fu’s shop through a window this time, but it was Marinette that passed out, broken, on his shop’s hardwood floor…

Next time Marinette came to, everything was dark. She startled violently. Her head felt as if it were filled with cotton, her arms and legs were heavy, and something was pulling on her left arm uncomfortably. As she trashed around warm hands came up on her shoulders, and she startled into stillness.

“Shh, Marinette, it’s okay. Calm down. You are in the hospital. You are safe.”

It was her father’s voice. Once again – beaten, sore, and terrified – Marinette started to weep.

Wet, breathless sobs wrecked her small frame as she pawed at the bandages wrapped over her eyes. Tom and Sabine exchanged worried looks. Their baby girl looked so small, so terribly frail in that big hospital bed, and they were both lost.

“Hush love, shhh, it will be okay, we’re here with you,” Sabine whispered to her daughter, fingers combing through the matted black hair coming out from above the tight bandages. Slowly, Sabine moved her hands down, entwining fingers with her daughter’s and bringing their hands down into Marinette’s lap.

“What happened Mama?” Marinette finally asked, though she dreaded the answer.

“You got hurt in the akuma attack, honey. You had a concussion, they think, and you wandered around for a while before someone found you and brought you in here.”

Marinette turned to the sound of her father’s voice and asked, feebly:

“Why can’t I see, Papa, what’s wrong with me?”

“Love –” Tom started, but Sabine stopped him with a look.

“Your eyes got hurt by the chemical that got released out of those horrible container trucks,” Sabine told her daughter gently, “they’ll need some time to heal. That’s what the bandages are for, love.”

Tom pursed her lips, the doctors’ words of scarring and likely permanent damage still fresh on his mind, but he understood. Marinette was frightened. It wouldn’t do to scare her any further. Although he wasn’t sure if giving their daughter false hope was the best idea…

“Marinette! Oh girl, you gave us all such a fright!” Alya’s voice came from the door, a booming delivery from the misery that was her uncomfortably silent hospital room. Mari had insisted that her parents go back to the bakery, they already missed too many days for her, and she didn’t want to ruin her family’s business on top of everything else.

“You look horrible! Oh Mari, I am so, so sorry.” Her friends voice was quieter now, and though Marinette felt warmth of Alya settling on the chair right by her bed, her insides turned cold. “I thought you ran to safety when I couldn’t see you anywhere, and instead you were hurt, and I didn’t help you. Some best friend I am!”

Alya was blaming herself. Marinette had failed-failed as Ladybug, failed Paris-and her best friend was blaming herself?

“Alya no! It wasn’t your fault!” It was mine, she didn’t say.

Alya pursed her lips and looked over her friend with worry etched into every line of her face, but this, Marinette couldn’t see. At long last Alya sighed, with resignation. She hugged Marinette tightly and for a second Mari thought she could feel drops of something wet and warm hit her cheek.

But then Alya moved away and asked in a perfectly calm and clear voice:

“So, how are you feeling? No, I am stupid, don’t answer that. Of course you feel horrible – what even are all these things they got you on?”

Alya pointed to the IV bags and waited a beat, only to realize Marinette couldn’t see her gesture.

“I mean-the IVs, what are they giving you? At least some good drugs?”

Marinette smiled, a small hesitant thing though it was.

“Yup. The best. Makes everything feel like a dream. Maybe it is!” she tried to joke.

“Oh no you don’t, girl! If this was your dream, I am pretty sure there’d be –” Alya suddenly stopped mid-sentence.

“Chat Noir.”

Marinette scoffed. “What would Chat Noir be doing in my dream?”

“Meow-ch, that hurt, Princess. I am paws-itively dreamy!”

Chaton.

“Ch-Chat Noir?!”

Alya was having the wildest daydream, otherwise this was making no sense. The spandex-clad superhero climbed in through the window, his characteristic smirk falling off his face the moment he really saw Marinette.

“Oh Princess! Princess, what happened?”

His voice was so soft just then and Mari almost wept again. Almost.

“It’s nothing Chaton. ‘Tis just a flesh wound. You should have seen the other guy!”

You should have seen the other guy? Really, Marinette? She groaned internally – but it must have worked, for both Alya and Chat giggled at her silly joke.

“That was horrible, Mari, even for you.” Alya giggled, grasping her hand.

“I am hilarious, and you know it.” Marinette deadpanned. “Now, Chat, as much as I appreciate seeing your pretty face, is there a reason you’re here?”

“Aw princess, you really think I am pre–” Chat started saying, then, at Alya’s guffaw, he realized she had her eyes bandaged and most definitely could not see him. “I wish you wouldn’t be so cruel to me.”

“Dream on, Alley Cat.”

“Alas, my sweet princess, it wasn’t you I came looking for – Miss Césaire, you think this Alley Cat could borrow you for a bit?”

“Me?”

“Her?”

Alya turned to exchange incredulous looks with Marinette, but her friend was still turned, unseeingly, away in Chat’s direction. Alya’s heart clenched painfully, so she turned back to Chat instead.

“I mean now isn’t the best time, but I suppose…”

“It’s okay, Alya, really, I mean, it’s not like I am gonna go anywhere…” Marinette gave her friend a bright smile, “Go, help him. God knows he needs all the supervision he can get.”

“Oi!” Chat exclaimed, but Alya was already dragging him outside, through the door this time around.

Marinette had her own reasons for wanting Alya to leave. She had a pretty good idea about why Chat would need the famous ladyblogger to help him, and if Ladybug was to make an appearance, Marinette needed to be alone.

“Tikki? Hey, Tikki, are you here?”

“Yes Marinette? What is it?” her Kwami’s soft voice answered.

“Can you make sure the door is locked?”

Mari heard the whoosh of air being displaced as the small creature whizzed across the room, then a metallic click, and voila. Instant privacy.

“Tikki – spots on!”

It was a weird feeling to be transformed into Ladybug, her senses coming back to her with a view of a crammed hospital room. She looked through the windows and her eyes watered at the sight of the bright blue sky.

No. She didn’t have time for this. She had to call Chat.

Opening her yo-yo communicator, the ladyblog popped up on the screen, and just as she expected, a fresh message from Chat Noir to Ladybug featured on the front page.

“Chat!” she spoke calmly into the answering machine, “I am okay, but I need some time to recover after that last akuma fight. Do you think you can handle Paris on her own for a few days? Don’t worry Kitty, I won’t leave you on your lonesome for too long. Bug out.”

With a sigh, she gave one last longing look to the open sky before de-transforming in a wave of searing pain.

“Shit,” she groaned.

Tikki’s healing powers must have washed all the sedatives out of her system, but now that she was separated from the kwami once more, she would have to pay for that.

Days passed by in a swirl of nurses and doctors. Now that she was awake they were continuously prodding and probing her with more and more tests, trying, in vain, to understand just what had caused her so much pain and damage. Marinette wasn’t fussed – she knew what caused her injury, flinching anytime her mind conjured the image of feral Chat Noir and a void-black aura of cataclysm closing in on her face. And just as clearly, she knew no doctor would be able to help.

The longer she laid there, the more resigned she felt.

The hospital made her feel strangely floaty. Sterile and disconnected.

It was almost safe, in a way.

That is, until it wasn’t anymore.

“Mari, love!” her mother came into the room with a swirl of energy, “We’re finally taking you home!”

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#miraculous ladybug #love square #marichat #adrinette #fanfiction #angst #tw: blood #tw: loss of vision #marinette dupain-cheng #adrien agreste #alya cesaire #my stuff #ILBB

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preeshera · 6 years

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If Love Be Blind

Chapter 4

Angsty multi-chapter love square monstrosity (you have been warned)

(Chapter 1) (read on AO3) (I owe my life and sanity to my lovely beta Bell! Special thanks to Tala who is a sweetheart and indulges my ML rants)

Summary:

‘Marinette’s life is slipping through her fingertips, all the dreams and plans she made for herself shattered, as she falls deeper and deeper into misery.

What happened to Ladybug’s famous luck?

And could there be a way to bring it back? … a certain black cat, perhaps? Only time will tell.’

It was his hand that turned her world to ashes, but he must never know

-----

“Bullshit. Ever-fucking crap-covered hell!” Marinette exhaled heavily, her shoulders sagging in frustration. She was supposed to be happy to be home. Sure. She was in pain, completely blind, treated like a ticking bomb by her parents, and couldn’t even make it to the bathroom without knocking something over, but she was home.

Tears of frustration welled in her eyes as she gripped at the piece of furniture she bumped into. See, all the blind people in movies somehow automatically knew where they were going, but that, she quickly learned, was some rotten Hollywood propaganda.

As if she were supposed to magically know the layout of her entire house by heart the second she lost sight. Well , Marinette thought bitterly, her brain must have not gotten the memo.

She sat down hard on the tile floor and let the tears run free. Crying-that’s the only thing she was good at anymore.

‘Cheer up, Marinette,’ Tikki spoke up softly from above her.

Yeah, right. Easier said than done.

The stupid bandages itched and her head still hurt in irregular intervals, but apparently, she was well enough not to be on the good drugs anymore.

Marinette sighed. She hated this, all of it. Hated how she was angry all the time. Hated the noise, the dark, the stabbing pain behind her eyelids anytime she tried to lie down to sleep. Chat’s visit the other day made her feel so much better. She wished she could just go out and...

“Tikki, say, are my parents busy right now?”

The kwami pursed her lips disapprovingly, but Marinette wouldn’t have cared even if she could see – which she couldn’t.

‘ Last I checked they were downstairs in the bakery, but I don’t think –” but the kwami never got to finish her sentence.

“Tikki, spots on!”

Flying on her yo-yo through Parisian streets was an amazing feeling. Marinette felt that she hadn’t truly appreciated being Ladybug before.

Sure, there were the akumas and the danger; she knew that better than most. But even gray and cloudy, the vast expanse of the evening sky sang to her. She could finally see. Screw plain, boring, blind Marinette – she was Ladybug. She was a superhero. She could do anything.

Chat’s crimson eyes flashed in her mind, and she startled so badly she missed a step and twisted her ankle painfully, crashing down onto an empty roof. She shook as the memory took over. Distorted and unreal, it took a shape of her nightmares and overtook her senses.

Chat Noir was walking towards her. His black suit looked different, darker somehow. It was bulkier in the shoulders and made him look imposing. Monster-like. He smirked at her, but his teeth looked too sharp. His eyes were all wrong. Not warm, not laughing, but red – like blood.

Marinette shook like a leaf.

Then she realized her shaking legs weren’t covered in the polka-dotted red and black of her suit. She wasn’t Ladybug, just herself. Just Marinette.

Chat let loose a cold, disturbing laugh.

“My Lady.” he crooned, faux-sweetness, like venom, dripping from the words.

“My Lady?”

“Buginette?! What happened? Are you okay?!”

The warm, familiar voice colored with so much fright and concern was what finally brought her out of the episode. This was her Chat – this bright, warm, friendly presence. Not that horrible nightmare.

“Ladybug?”

Marinette shook off like a wet dog and tried to piece her confident Ladybug persona back together.

“Hey Chaton,” she said softly and met the familiar pair of bright green eyes after a beat of hesitation.

“Don’t just ‘Hey Chaton’ me! What happened LB? You looked totally terrified there...” He was drawing in a breath to continue on his rant, but stopped at the look on her face.

“I am sorry I worried you, Chat Noir. I am still a bit shaken by the last attack, that’s all.”

His expression turned somber.

“Have I told you that I am sorry?”

“No! Chat you know it wasn’t your fault!”

“I used my Cataclysm on you, you could have died!”

“And I didn’t. It wasn’t you, it was the akuma, and you know it – just like you knew it all those other times. I am fine, really.”

Suddenly, she didn’t feel like being Ladybug was helping her mood anymore. She swung her yo-yo around and pushed off the rooftop without a single look back.

“See you at patrol, Minou.”

The moment she de-transformed she fell prone to the floor. Part of it was the banging headache caused by the meds Lady-bugging out of her system. Part was her general lack of will to attempt to get anywhere like this.

After a few beats, her head cleared a smidge, and she almost went to sit up, when she heard a strange noise from down below.

She realized where she landed must be directly above the kitchen, and straining her ears to focus as much as she could, she heard the whispered argument from downstairs.

“Sabine, you can’t mean to lie to her forever.” She covered her mouth. Daddy never argued with mom. It was always her chiding him for something or other.

“She is not ready for another set of bad news. Tom, she barely gets up in the morning. She doesn’t eat properly. What good would it do to tell her?”

There was a beat of silence, and Marinette could feel tears pricking her eyes underneath the bandage. Her parents, her loving, amazing, supportive parents were arguing because of her.

“False hope doesn’t help anyone. She needs to accept her condition and learn how to move on, Sabine. We all do.”

With a gasp Marinette realized her mom was crying.

Enough.

She shot up to her feet and after fumbling for a few steps she threw herself in the general direction of her bed.

Accept her condition? Move on? They had no idea, Marinette realized. Her parents thought she believed her blindness was only temporary. They thought she didn’t know!

Well, yes, it was easy to pretend with the bandages pressing heavy over her eyes, but Marinette wasn’t stupid. Cataclysm to the fucking face doesn’t just heal.

Not overnight. And probably not ever. If Tikki couldn’t heal her she doubted some conventional medicine had a shot.

But they thought she didn’t know. How could she have?

And they’re arguing about how to tell me... Marinette thought grimly. Her musings, however, were cut short by footsteps coming up the stairs towards her room.

Marinette focused on the footsteps, but she had honestly no idea. Seriously, popular culture gave her such unrealistic expectations for this. A soft knock on the door echoed around her quiet room.

“Come in!”

“Hello dear, how are you feeling?” Mom drew the short straw, then.

“Okay. Blind.” Marinette said dryly, then instantly regretted it.

“I am sorry mama, I don’t know what’s wrong with me these days – I feel so angry all the time.”

Warm arms wrapped around her and her mother’s comforting smell calmed her down.

“Here, it’s okay love, it’s okay. I am pretty sure you are not the first teenager to ever snap at her mom. Given the situation, I would say you have more reasons than most.”

Marinette nodded, lips pursed.

“Do you feel like coming down? Your father and I need to talk to you about some things. It can wait if you are tired, or –”

“No, mom, I’m fine. Help me down?”

Marinette let herself be led by the hand like a child and tried her best not to feel too bitter about it. She could just about make it into the kitchen on her own these days. She asked her parents not to move furniture around and leave things in her path so she could move around on her own. Sadly, they all forgot about it way too often for her to be sure she could make the longer trips through the house unscathed.

It was probably a good thing that Marinette couldn’t see her parents just then. Sabine’s blotchy red eyes and Tom’s worried, tired look wouldn’t have made the upcoming talk any easier.

“Marinette, your father and I,” her mom started, but her voice broke, “your father and I need to tell you something important.”

I know mama. I know, it’s okay, Marinette wanted to say, but she remained silent and still.

“We decided to move away from Paris.”

Wait. Rage bubbled inside her like hot lava.

“What? What do you mean move away?!” Marinette demanded angrily, “why would you do that? And what about the bakery? Mom you can’t be serious!”

“Calm down, Marinette,” her father pleaded.

“We found an amazing institute that could help you, and we decided it is worth moving for.”

“ You decided?! Well that’s just grand, isn’t it. None of you thought to ask the poor, blind Marinette what she thought about it, have you?!”

She was screaming now, but she didn’t care.

“Well if you think I will let you abandon all your dreams and hard work just because of me, you are wrong. I will stay in Paris alone if I have to. I am not going anywhere!”

Her father was about to say something, but she stood up, storming off into her room. If she knocked over a chair or two on her way, or stubbed her toe on the stairs, it really was nobody’s business but her own.

I will not let them do this , she seethed internally once she finally made it into her room.

I just won’t allow it! Her hands clenched into fists as she tried to restrain the angry tears threatening to spill.

You won’t allow it? How cute. A cruel little voice piped up inside her head. And what exactly do you think you can do about it?

Marinette bit her lip.

Arms extended in front of her she made her way towards her table, there she pawed at the smooth wood for a second before managing to locate her phone.

She unlocked it with her thumb and calmed her shaking voice to activate the voice recognition:

“Hey Cortana? Call Alya Cesaire, please!”

Three beeps later her best friend picked up with a wall of blabber.

“Marinette? Are you okay? Is everything alright? Are you hurt? Do I need to come over?!”

“ALYA!”

“Oh, yes, sorry,” her friend apologized sheepishly, “Chilling out. Sorry. No overcompensating – I remember what you said the last time.”

Marinette sighed.

“I need my awesome, smart, incredible best friend to work a miracle for me. Is she there, or is this my new helicopter mother talking?”

Alya grumbled.

“So, which one is it?”

“Your best friend, always.” she replied dutifully. “So what is it, Mari, you sound kinda, well, mad?”

“It’s my parents. They want us to move away from Paris - to some village that has this amazing institute for blind kids.”

There was a beat of silence.

“That sucks. But maybe the new school will be super great for you, and, and I can always come to visit, right? I’ll drag Nino, and Adrien with me! And Juleka, Rose and Alix will want to come too, I –”

“No!” Marinette stopped her resolutely.

“No? You don’t want us to visit?” Alya asked, her voice tiny.

“No, I don’t want to go. I don’t want to move away, and I don’t want to go to some super special school for blind kids. I want my old life back - okay? I know that I can’t see now, okay, I know! But plenty of people can’t, and they aren’t all locked away in some institutes in the countryside !”

Stunned silence followed suit.

“Mari, I...” Alya started gently, but Marinette interrupted her again.

“Alya – I don’t need your pity! God knows I have enough by myself. What I really need right now is my best friend to help me find some way around this. I know my parents don’t really want to leave. The bakery is their life Alya. And I don’t want to take that away, not because of this.”

“I get it, Mari, I do. I will go do some research – I promise I will find something!”

The new fire in Alya’s voice spread warmth of relief in Marinette’s belly. Finally. Her best friend was back.

They could do this.

-----

#ml fanfic #ml season 2 #marichat #adrinette #love square #marinette dupain-cheng #adrien agreste #sabine cheng #tom dupain #alya cesaire #fanfiction #ILBB #my stuff #multi chapter

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