#im going to be stuck offline for years at a time now if i just fuck off of tumblr for a few days i am SO sorry 😔

[codecicle]

my family agreed for me to run a dnd mini campaign for them the intrest spreads >:DD

[vesprynna]

Today is my 34th birthday, aaah!! Toot toot the birthday flute!! 🥳🙌 As per usual, here's my annual birthday pinup 💖 This year features my soft forest monster lad Khalan lounging in a refreshing forest pool 💖 He's from my WIP comic project DEAREST!

A hi res downloadable version of this year's pinup + a timelapse is free for everyone to enjoy on my Ko-Fi 🥰🙌

Here are the other versions of Khalan and Willow over the years! I feel like celebrating their journey too 🥳 Which one is your fav?

🌱🌻🌾🌷🌾🌻🌱🌻🌾🌷🌻🌾🌱

Now, Im going to be a bit sappy so... Bear with me, or just enjoy the art and go on with your day, whatever suits you. Thank you for being here regardless 💖

To imagine that 20 years ago I didn't think I'd live to see my 20's... But I'm still here, and I'm so happy that I am 💖 Life's been rough, and it will continue to be at times, but thankfully there's pockets of joy to be found in the chaos. It really can be as simple as a funny tag someone leaves on my art, my best friend @unicornia93 doodling something funny to cheer me up, or the boundless enthusiasm my fiance has for ANY idea I share with him or my family being their goofy but wonderful selves 😂💖

I also want to extend a sincere Thank You to everyone who's supported and followed me over the years. Every year when my birthday comes around I always wonder how I got so lucky to be blessed with great friends, a wonderful fiance and my small but loving family... And to also be part of a community both online and offline amongst kindhearted, passionate people and artists. I don't say this often enough, but I truly appreciate each and every one of you! From my regular followers who always, always like my art (yes, I see you 💖), and to my friends, family and fiance for giving encouragement and critique to help me grow as an artist and person. You guys are absolutely wonderful!! 💖🙏

I'm glad I stuck around to experience all that life has had to offer so far. Thank you for being here with me in this moment, I hope you will be here next year too 💖💐

[creativebrainrot]

Open Journal Entry

long one. TLDR: This fucking house sucks and it's never felt like a home to me. I want out but the WAITING,,,,, its suffocating. we'll be out eventually. Im so sick of waiting though. I miss the. eight months, where I felt truly alive for the first time in my entire life. I want a car back. I want to move out. I want to leave all this misery and abuse behind us already. I want a life. I am going insane.

But the horrors wont fucking win because I am NOTHING if not fueled by spite and fury.

I wanna talk about my experience with this house I'm currently stuck in, and have been stuck in for 22 years now.

I do not have a single memory of feeling safe within this house, or a single memory of enjoying this house. I have memories of enjoying the wilderness nearby, the front yard, the back yard, the creek way out back. But not the house.

I felt safe in the bath as a kid. I feel safe dissociating in the shower. I have spent ages avoiding being fully-lucid in this house. Numbing myself by diving into video games, the internet, consuming media like video essays about random shit, political commentary, let's plays, etc. Anything that I could hide in and avoid being aware of my situation with.

Music and art were big ones for escaping.

Everything about this house is falling apart.

I finally felt alive for the first time in my entire life in 2022. And yet. 2022 had the worst months of my entire life within it.

And now. I'm stuck. Waiting. Again. Just like I have been my entire fucking life. Stuck, in the middle of nowhere, without people my age, without places I enjoy seeing, without people who care in my offline personal life.

Waiting. For the day my dad can tell me we are finally free.

We had no idea that we had so much legal bullshit we needed to sort after my father died in late january this year. So, we've had to deal with all of it; the confusion, the legal shit, the pain, the helplessness, etc, as we discover every new fucking step we weren't told about and couldn't find the answer to. because we're both neurodivergent, and traumatized. that affects a lot of what we are able to do and what we aren't.

I'm fucking tired of announcing what should be good news, over and over and over, only to find that there's more fucking waiting on the other side. Hope, hurts. Right now everytime I start to hope I start to hurt so i've just been living in numbness since march this year.

The pump & water is fucked up, we have to work around it. We have running water, but we have to turn off the pump everytime we're done using it.

The AC is broken. It was replaced a few years ago and now it's the wrong type of AC for our house. It doesnt fucking work and our bedrooms are little ovens because of it. I have had to move my mattress into my studio, the only room with a window AC.

I have been stuck with a fucking twin bed since I was 15. Which, while technically a useable size for me, I cannot begin to unravel and to explain the kind of demoralizing and humiliating being stuck with the same fucked up "not a real bed or Adult Mattress" is for me.

Fucking bugs get inside ALL THE GODDAMN TIME.

We haven't been able to work doordash for MONTHS now and I miss that routine so goddamn much.

I finally had a real life for the first time ever in my entire life, and its gone. Because we were lied to. Kept in the dark. Didn't realize how bad our situation was, until it was too late.

The only reason we are okay, is because of kindness from my friends and kindness from our neighbors.

I just want this to be over now.

I have never felt happy in this house. My dad and I never have the energy to clean it. I barely have the energy to take care of myself. I used to work out and exercise, I used to feel so happy. We ate good food and I got to cook and have fun and feel normal for awhile.

then the car broke down.

This house has always felt either neutral or fucking miserable. I've watched so many beloved pets die in this house. I've only ever been abused in this house. I've felt so fucking depressed in this house.

It's not even in an area where I can escape to a friend's house, or walk to a park, or enjoy any amenities. Because it's in the middle of fucking nowhere, retirement neighborhoods for rich old white republicans who wouldn't fucking speak to us if they knew who we really were. It's only because my dad masks as a ditzy old white lady that they're so nice to him.

I hate it here. I've been suffocating here long enough. I can't handle another year.

I think it might break me.

Everytime I'm remotely fully lucid in this house, I feel like shit. I remember things that I want to forget. I've dreamed of moving out and having my own place since I was a child. I thought my life would be better when I was 19- to be kind to fate, it was. Much better when I was 19. But not the normal fulfilling life I wanted to have.

I want out because everything we are currently dealing with is residual abuse from my father's financial abuse of us.

I need to leave this place. There's so much fucking sorrow and pain here for me that I just want to forget and move on from. not to mention this state it's self is fucking miserable to live in.

And, we will be. It's just the waiting. The waiting hurts. But I'd rather keep waiting for a brighter tomorrow than do something I can't take back.

I want to see our pets happy and healthy again, in a house with furniture for them. Collars with their name tags and vet tags on them. All fluffy and talkative and cute again.

I want better healthcare access so that I can stop panicking about my dad's mortality- he's fine, but I am so scared I'll lose him to something avoidable before we have the stability to get checkups and such. I want the option available to fucking transition already. I need HRT. Life is so fucking miserable everyday that I can't start being myself finally.

I want a house that I actually like. A place that represents new opportunities and new memories and REAL TRUE FREEDOM, freedom from all this abuse, freedom from my miserable first quarter of life alive. Freedom from debt that was never our fucking fault. A place I can be lucid in, and maybe actually have energy in.

And we'll probably get it. It's just, the waiting.

The second person we are attempting to sell this piece of shit to, is someone who purchases and flips houses for a living. He's offered the same amount of money as our neighbor did.

I'm so fucking glad that the paperwork is all on my dad's side and that we even HAVE a house to sell in this current climate.

Because that means we might get to move into the house my dad thought we were going to have all those years ago. I can't begin to tell you how many lies our abuser told us.

[franceein]

How would you introduce yourself to the blogging community? Be creative!

Feeling tired lately? Then you’re in the right blog!

C’est la vie —that is life.

Hello, everyone! I go by the name Francine. Last name is Natividad. (2x + 7, x = 4) years of age from Gamu, Isabela. And just like you, I’m also feeling tired lately. But, what’s life without tiredness? It is part of life.

Let me tell you a story!

I am a student of Saint Paul University Philippines located at Tuguegarao, Cagayan. I recently started my Senior High School here wherein I am enrolled in the HUMSS strand. For two months, we’re still in blended-modality (online and face-to-face) wherein it alternates weekly. After 2 years of doing online classes because of the pandemic, engaging in a whole day or a whole week rather of face-to-face class, it’s unbelievably tiring. My body got used to staying inside my own bedroom all throughout an online class day but the coming back of normal practice in school is making me more exhausted than ever. Can you relate? Of course you can!

I’ve been questioning my existence for quite some time now. I keep on asking myself, “For what am I living?”, “Will these sacrifices be worth it in the end?”. Questions like that let me deeper understand my purpose in life. However, I can’t seem to answer those. I’m always stuck with the question, “why?” and it’s always complicated to answer. However, I go on with life. I sleep late to complete assignments and wake up early to review and continue unfinished homeworks. I ready myself for school and socialize with people. I go home feeling tired and sleepy. Repeat. Despite of how unwilling we are to live, we have no choice but to kee on breathing and that becomes a will.

I used to love writing poems, doing calligraphy, reading wattpad novels, and fangirling over Kpop idols. But because of the busy life in result of school and academics, I barely have time to do my hobbies. And now, I don’t even feel the “spark” of doing those anymore. I got detached with what I love and entered adulting life too early. It feels like yesterday, I’m a student whose enjoying every bit of her life by doing great in school and nurturing her skills and talents. But time goes by so fast that now, I’m facing the real responsibilities in life which is the result of being independent.

But what can we do? C’est la vie —that is life.

We might be getting older and older every time passing by but in the end, we’re still children by heart. We might face different kinds of difficulties and hurdles in life, get pass through it, but we still get emotional even with the tiniest things. And that’s complety okay! Cry, smile, laugh, be anxious, be scared; there’s no problem with that. Just always remember to get up on your own because it’s your body, it’s your life and no one will do and live it for you.

Wait, a little reminder:

Slay life today, and slay life again tomorrow!

Again, this is Francine Natividad.

Now, temporarily offline.

1. Where do I see myself 10 years from now? Was my learning in SPUP vital to where Im leading to?

To be honest, I’m still debating with myself about my plans for the future. However, I hope that in 10 years, I’ll have my Juris Doctor degree already. It would also be great if I’ve already passed the BAR exam and took my oath. Although indefinite, I see myself in a courtroom; defending a client wherein I am the hope of the oppressed.

I needed growth and knowledge and SPUP gave me those. Choosing this university among any other universities is a step forward in achieving my goal of becoming a lawyer. Therefore, learning here is a vital procedure as to how and what I’m gonna be in 10 years.

2. Was HUMSS the best choice after all?

I was convinced and I am still convinced that HUMSS is the right strand for me. I’m the type of student that prefers essay writing or writing in general than analyzing things in a scientific way. Although life science is interesting, I’m mesmerized with social science. So, I’d like to know more about it. In addition, I’ll take up law thus, the subjects from HUMSS will help me prepare for what I’m going to study in college for pre-law and law school proper.

3. What course will you take in college and why?

In college, I’m planning to take up AB Psychology as my pre-law. This is my first choice for the reason that I can take the board exam for Psychometricians after I graduate from College. And comparing from other possible pre-laws like AB Political Science and AB Legal Management, I would have no license if I ever decided not to further pursue law. At least in Psychology, I have a chance to possess a Psychometrician license aside from a Bachelor’s degree.

HUMSS 11 - Elisha

[stardusttkachuk]

sorry im so late with this! I was offline most of the weekend! I cant wait to read literally any of the fics you write, but if i could request (gonna send in three seperate, so feel free to only pick one, or none at all!) #3 with Seggy

3. “When did you stop loving me?”

— — — — —

For almost a month now Tyler had been sneaking around. You never knew what he was doing, but he’d leave early on days when you knew he didn’t have practice or morning skate, saying he was getting in extra practice with Miro or getting physical therapy. He’d come home at odd hours, often times very late at night and into the early hours of the morning, not just after games but almost every day. He’d hardly ever be home, and you knew there was no way all these long days were just because of hockey. There was something else going on.

You hated the tightness in your chest as you thought about confronting him. You were going to do it today, when he got home. But the hours ticked by and you grew tired and restless, your head swarming with thoughts of why he had been avoiding home at all costs.

Cheating was the obvious reason that came to mind. But you couldn’t put all your eggs in one basket; there was never any explicit evidence that Tyler was cheating. He could’ve just been very good at covering his tracks though.

Him falling out of love with you was another reason. People fell out of love all the time. Couples that had been together for decades fell out of love sometimes. Maybe you and Tyler just weren’t destined to be forever. Maybe your love was temporary and he was avoiding you so he wouldn’t have to say it.

You hadn’t realized you had fallen asleep on the couch, nor had you remembered crying so hard. You knew a few tears had fallen as you thought of all the reasons why Tyler was avoiding home, but you woke up to a sore throat, puffy eyes, and dried tears all down your cheeks, all the signs of a very heavy cry.

It was just past midnight and Tyler walking through the door is what woke you. You didn’t have time to clean yourself up before you comforted him.

“When did you stop loving me?” The words came out rough and scratchy and they came out before you could even rethink them.

“I— Baby, what?” Tyler asked, clearly taken aback by your question. He flipped on the lights, his eyes immediately finding yours.

You cleared your throat, trying to get rid of the knot that was stuck there. “Do you still love me?”

“Of course,” he said quickly, scrambling to take a few steps towards you and reach out for you. “Why would you ever think differently?”

“You’re never here. I never see you. What am I supposed to think when my boyfriend starts avoiding me at all costs?”

“I’m not— I wasn’t— Oh, fuck,” Tyler hung his head low, realizing how his absence could be mistaken for a fallout. “I’ve been planning our two year anniversary. We didn’t get to do anything for our one year and I felt so bad that I wanted to make it up to you and go big for our second.”

“So you aren’t cheating on me?”

“God, no. Baby, I would never. Please, please look me in the eyes,” he begged. He tipped your chin up, keeping his finger underneath it, his thumb resting gently on your jaw. “I love you, so fucking much. And only you. And I’m just trying to make next week special for you since you were so upset about our one year. I’ve been with the guys every night, on the phone with your parents and my parents and my sisters. I’ve had early mornings trying to set things up. And I can’t tell you what it is, not yet. It’s a surprise. But I need you to believe me when I say: I will never stop loving you.”

[chanluster]

— check in tag!

tagged by @healinghyunjin and @kookings thank u sm!!! except for sunny go fuck urself 

1) why did you choose your url?

oh my fucking god basically you know like ‘lustre’? like sparkles and shit? i thought chan + lustre would be cool cause chan is a glowing boy but i used the british spelling instead and now i sound like a total horndog 💀💀 its the way i didn’t even realise till my friends pointed it out and now i can’t change it yfm but yeh clearly lacking brain cells

2) any side blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them!

okay so 

gyuluster — my txt account!! ive had it for a while but ive been so dead on there 😭😭 tho i did promise myself that this summer i want to write more content about them so skz im sorry but 💨💨

amorlix — my giffing account!! ive recently gotten into giffing and i love it sm tho i admit it takes up sm of my time 😭 i will try using it more often

i have more but i’m gonna keep them a secret for now 😼😼 most of them are just made to gatekeep usernames LMDOAAO

3) how long have you been on tumblr?

i think it’s defo been more than a year now!! ngl hate it hate tumblr but i love writing too much to let it go so i guess we stuck 😃

4) do you have a queued tag?

no i don’t actually tho i think i should start using it sometime soon

5) why did you start your blog?

i really wanted to get away from wattpad 💀 after writing for bts for so long on there and then completely abandoning them for stray kids it made me realise i needed a fresh start away from there + the writing here is a lot better than i found on wattpad so that’s a huge plus

6) why did you choose your icon?

because felix in that fit is so fine i don’t think i’ll ever recover THE NET THE FUCKING RED NET

7) why did you choose your header?

because jake from enhypen owns me body and soul this man could call me a currymuncher and i’d happily comply ‼️ also him in drunk-dazed studio choom was an 8th wonder of the world

8) what’s your post with most notes?

my 10/10 fic !! my chan fic racked up over 1500 notes and i still haven’t recovered 👁💧👄💧👁 thank you so much for the support guys ❤️❤️

9) how many mutuals do you have?

literally 15 and half of them don’t use tumblr anymore 💀💀 i would love to make friends here but i have major trust issues cause of past experiences LMFAO

10) how many followers do you have?

1750+!! thank you homies omg

11) how many blogs do you follow?

34

12) how often do you use tumblr each day?

way too much fr like i’m genuinely thinking about writing offline, post and fuck off i’m way too addicted to this hellsite 💀💀

13) did you have a fight/ start another argument with a blog once? who won?

LMAO that shit is so childish if i don’t like someone i just block, unfollow, or keep the grudge stewing within me for months cause i fucking hate confrontation

14) how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this post?’

if you mean the “reblog this in 10 seconds or spongebob would make a krabby patty out of you” posts then they’re annoying as hell 11 year old me truly thought my mum would die at one point cause i didn’t like them on facebook

15) do you like tag games?

yes i do! they’re really cute but i’m so shit at responding to them so if you do tag me i love u i’m not ignoring u i promise

16) do you like ask games?

yes yes yes!! don’t hesitate to ask me shit i feel like i’m hella isolated on stayblr 💔💔

17) which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

i mean tumblr fame is a scam but i know my desi degen @tyonfs is well known on nct (and well enough to be slandered on a youtube video!! congrats on ur downfall whore😻‼️)

18) do you have a crush on a mutual?

@mocimori i love u ur art and ur lost boy! skz ramblings please know i enjoy listening to ur ideas and would 100% buy ur lip balm if u pitched it to me also ive never gotten over the paris fanart i love u sm

tagging: anyone who wants to do this!!

[arcadequeerz]

Just some kinda gender feelings.

Sometimes it Rly Sucks bein stuck like this d:] Like fuck dude It’s not like I’m ever going to be able to pass. Or look how i want to anytime soon. Shit costs so much fucking money that I’ll probably never have in my lifetime- I’m just gonna be stuck like this forever! 🙃 I have how i want to look in my head but its not like its going to happen anytime soon. 

I’m so tired of feeling ugly- and gross- n seeing my self everytime i look in the mirror. Like holy shit i hate my face- its wrong and bad n i dont want it anymore. Wish I was faceless n was nothing because it would be better when what I am now. Sometimes I jus kinda wish I could rip my skin off n pull myself apart i fucking Hate this body I hate my Face and I hate my voice.

I am only made out of shit I hate.

n Sometimes its really hard to just feel like I belong anywhere. People constantly laugh at me- im never taken seriously- I’m never seen as anything other then a Joke and that’s probably all I’m ever going to be to people!!!!! I’m just something to be laughed at and pointed at n made fun of! That’s it. I do not matter- I’m not ever going to matter- n no ones ever going to see me as anything else. N Half the time i say this shit im told I have to change- or make ‘effort’ to try to belong. 

I’v e tried. It doesn’t work I’m just laughed at more for trying. I’m just this joke and I’m just Ugly n I’m nothing else. 

I do not feel welcome anywhere. The closest interaction I’ve had with other queer people offline is me trying to explain my identity n people trying to hide laughter. I don’t belong anywhere, I’m just a joke to people.

I try to be seen as a serious person but I’m treated like a fucking child and a joke n I’m tired but what's the point in trying to be anything else because its all I’m ever seen as. I’m tired of being told I’m cute n nothing else. i’M 23 Years old n I’m tired of that being the only fucking thing people call me- im tired of being treated like a fucking child who knows nothing.

[optimismrpt]

HOW RIGBY RUNS A ROLEPLAY : A VERY SPECIFIC GUIDE ( OF SORTS )

BONUS CONTENT: ACCEPTANCE DAY

I think it’s essentially to start with this disclaimer: This is merely how I run a rp and I’m not saying by any means it is how a rp should be run. I have found success through these methods all in combination and I can’t promise that they work all the time.

IMPORTANT ! if you use this guide as a basis for your rp please credit back to me somewhere on your front page, rules, or plot! this is a very specific type of rp (small limited run plot heavy skeleton rp) that i have worked very hard to develop over the past five years. i want you to learn from my successes and failures, and please give credit where it is due!

It is a lot of work! Like A LOT! And if you don’t have time to admin with full commitment this is not the right type of rp to attempt.

With that in mind, let’s go!

FULL GUIDE IN THE SOURCE LINK! 

BEFORE THE ACTUAL DAY

First of all, getting apps is fun and it’s easy to get wrapped up in the excitement and want to move things forward as soon as possible. However, I recommend you don’t rush! Do not move up your acceptance date or the date that you close the inbox! This isn’t fair to the people who were planning on finishing up their apps before the original deadline who now have to crunch to meet the new deadline or may not be able to make the new deadline at all because of irl responsibilities. It’s always good to give lots of warning for the inbox closing and stick to it! 

I also recommend that you do not lower the threshold of people needed to open. Sometimes it can be disheartening to set an app threshold at ten and then only get six apps, even if the days grind on with no new apps, stick it out and keep promoting! Opening with less than eight characters (and for apples I’d say 15 characters) is going to make activity lackluster. It’s better to delay opening for the sake of having a grand first day than to jump the gun and end up making the rp fizzle before it can even start. 

About 52 hours before acceptances are set to take place I like to write out a to-do list and put it in my drafts. It usually involves ‘write acceptance posts, update skeletons, update main, post acceptances, post follows, post opening note’. Just having everything you need to do between then and opening written out in order is so helpful. And being able to check things off the list creates both a feeling of relief and excitement. So make a plan, determine how soon everything needs to be done, and work through it meticulously. In the rush of opening day it can be easy to forget important things like updating the triggers page.

If I have time I try to write everything hours in advance. When it comes to things like opening announcements and plot drops I try to write those at least 24 hours of their release time. And this is why I like, for competitive rps, to close the inbox and then give myself at least two hours to deliberate. But I’d even encourage giving yourself 6 hours between the inbox closing and posting acceptances. I know that’s a while to make people wait but apps can get pretty long and reading them all (and probably rereading a few of them multiple times) can be a lengthy process! 

I always try not to read the apps at all before the deliberation time. I find that if I read an app when it comes in that gives the first person an advantage because they have more time for me to adapt to their vision and start to assimilate it and get attached. And that’s not fair to the people who may have stumbled upon the rp later. So I just read the app far enough to get the info for the app count.

Just as a general rule I like to post important dates and times in at least two different timezones. For example ‘Acceptances are at 6am GMT / 1pm EST / 10pm PST ’. That way you can show that you are keeping other timezones in mind. And plus it’s nice to just to the conversion work so your applicants don’t have to. 

DELIBERATION TIME

Start by reading the apps which don’t have competition. These ones are easiest because it’s not a matter of determining whether they are the best of the bunch, it’s just deciding whether or not they are are passable. So I always read those first and then write their acceptance post immediately after I make my decision so that at least I’ll have that to post at the set acceptance date. That way, even if I haven’t made a decision on all the apps I’ll have something to post to show that I am reading apps and trying to stick to schedule! 

When your are dealing with competitive apps there are a few things I look for in an application: 

The most important is that the applicant seems willing to talk to you. This could be asks, ims, or even a little note in the app! Writers who want to make it clear what their intentions/desires/goals are ooc are going to be the easiest to work with! Plus it gives you an idea of how flexible they are! Those who dig their heels in when you offer up alternative suggestions are probably not good to work with. You want to find someone who has direction, intention, and ideas but don’t treat your ideas (or anyone else’s) as lesser than their own. 

Call for humor! I’ve found that I have trouble with people who take themselves and their characters too seriously. This means that they often won’t be up for plotting since they don’t want their character to be anything less than graceful. Humor is a really good sign that a writer is fun, creative, and understands their character. 

I also get wary of people who overhype the rp. Making edits/adding memes in the talk tag is all very nice, but when it looks like an rpt is promoting my rp just to give themselves an advantage over other applicants I tend to count that against them. I don’t like the idea of an rpt trying to use their signal boosting and popularity in the rpc as leverage over me. 

One of the biggest red flags is someone not sticking to the skeleton! If someone blatantly disregards one or more aspects of the skeleton that is an instant strike against them. I don’t like it when people have ocs that they adapt to fit a skeleton because most of the time that means that they don’t really care about the skeleton and your ideas. However, if they contact me about changes to the skeleton in advance and ask if some edits are alright then that’s actually a really good sign! I want people to play a character that they are happy about and I’m willing to change up any skeleton. I just need to know the applicant is willing to work with me instead of against me. 

Do not be afraid to deny applications. I used to never do this because I felt it was too mean and judgmental but now I realize I reserve the right as an admin to deny any app or character that I don’t vibe with. Go with your gut, and if the application is making you uncomfortable or nervous in any way, do not accept them. Sometimes it’s better to have one role go unwritten than to have someone who isn’t good for the group. Because both ic and ooc dynamics contribute to the effectiveness and survival of the group, you need to be excited to work with everyone and their characters. 

One of the ways that I protect myself from muns who may not be right for the rp is by putting a password in the rules. Often the apps that make me uncomfortable are the ones that disregard or contradict the skeleton or plot. It’s clear that the mun either wasn’t paying attention, reading the pages carefully, or just chose to ignore what they read. It’s often That the apps that I don’t vibe with end up being the ones that don’t read the rules and therefor don’t put the password. So not only is it a good indicator to me that the mun might not be very considerate but it’s also a great default reason to deny an app without having to tell the mun directly that you didn’t like other aspects of their app. Most often I allow them to reapply if they’d like to but their acceptance won’t be immediate, so that there’s a chance someone else might apply for the same role with an application than doesn’t skeeve me out.

ONCE YOU’VE MADE THE DECISION

Write out your acceptance notes. I try to write a full paragraph for everyone when I am accepting for a skeleton rp. If there’s more than 20 characters being accepted then obviously don’t, since that’s way too much to ask of you. But if it’s a small group I always endorse writing a little welcome the chosen mun saying what ti was about their appt hat you gravitated towards. It’s kind of a way to also provide feedback to those who were denied as to what their app might have been missing. Plus, it’s just a good way to get the right vibes going for the ooc portion of the rp. Muns need to feel appreciated! After all they put in the work to get there! 

I also like to offer feedback to those who were denied but with a disclaimer that most apps are chosen based on how they mesh with the other apps, since that’s something no one can anticipate. Usually the quality of the writing isn’t as big of a factor as how the character plays into dynamics with the others and whether or not their desired plots and connections with your vision and everyone else’s. Most of the time people won’t take you up on it, but be kind and thoughtful to those who do. However, if they are aggressive towards you in any way because they are upset about being denied block them immediately. Just trust me on that one. 

Keep everyone updated as to your progress! Just telling everyone where you are at (in the process of reading apps, writing the acceptance notes, or taking a break) is a good way to put everyone’s minds at ease. It’s especially important to let people know if you are logging off for a while on acceptance day.  That way people aren’t stuck refreshing the page and dreading that you might be ignoring them. On acceptance day I like to make a post every time I come online or go offline. It may seem like oversharing but it’s honestly so helpful to both you and the applicants. 

POST-ACCEPTANCES

Once you are about to start posting acceptance notes, turn off anon. I know that anon can be very useful for those shy and curious folks that don’t want to im you directly, but this is another case where you’re just gonna have to trust me. For your mental health turn off anon and keep it off for at least 48 hours. I usually keep it off permanently unless there are more roles that need to be filled in a second round of acceptances. There aren’t really any questions that should need to be asked anonymously once you have a full roster of muns and this is a good way to get people used to asking you questions via discord, im, or dm. To prevent nasties from bullying you and to open the line of communication between you and your members, turn off anon! 

And finally, once you have posted acceptances, close your laptop or turn off your monitor and don’t come back to it for at least an hour. I like to give myself two hours to go on a walk, eat some food, and just do non-rp things for a while. Acceptances are stressful and it’s important not to get swept up in it and feel overwhelmed. Taking a step back and remembering you exist outside of rp and outside of being an admin is so important. It’s hard to resist temptation, but if you have anon off really the only thing that’ll come into your inbox are follow messages and those can wait for two hours (or more)! But like I said above, keep everyone updated that you are going to log off for a bit and you’ll be back. Just so no one assumes the worst. 

Just remember to be kind to your applicants and to yourself! It’s a stressful time for everyone! 

[p1nkwitch]

The actual conversation this time @nonbinaryeye

Almost there.

Your name is PETER LUK-

No, we are not doing this.

Peter sits in Oliver's land overseeing what he has to do, Annabelle was very specific about it, and the amount of time he would have before things get out of hand, once he uses the needles to scratch that thing, is counted.

Still he stalls, swinging his legs back and forth just appreciating the view from his spot. Peter feels truly nothing right now, not about his impending death or anything in particular. He is stalling because there is one thing left he has to do and he is wondering if he will do it.

From under his shirt he takes out the necklace with all of their wedding rings, he stares at it a little bit, before he dangles it over the edge of the building. The world is quiet and muffled, like it has never been before.

Peter thought that he knew forsaken well, being raised for it, but here it was even more intoxicating. He recalls vaguely Elias explain to him that because the amount of living creatures in the game is so small compared to the earth, and some of the things that live here are not developed enough to fear most of what their entities represent, they started to feed more from them while at the same time amping up their powers.

That plus their fight with the horrorterrors above made them more dangerous.The game was collapsing from the force of the supernatural things that followed them trying to survive by messing with it from the inside.

Finally what Annabelle said came to mind too, that they would be bringing them too in their trip to the new session. Peter thinks that it makes no sense. If they were getting so bad here, would it not make sense to drop them to die while they ran? Not that he would want to exist without forsaken by his side, god's no, he would rather burn on this planet than to do that, he wouldn't even know what to do.

Still those are all thoughts for those who like to overthink and speculate, he merely wants to see the place a little before death, his grip on the necklace slackens, but he doesn't drop it yet.

He cant.

Because there is one last thing he has to do before that.

FORSAKENTUNDRA started pestering WATCHERSCROWN and BEATINGHEART

FT: Hello

WC: THERE YOU ARE!! DO YOU KNOW HOW MAD I AM RIGHT NOW??

BH: Peter what the everloving hell!! Where were you?! How could no one find you!!!!

FT: Did Annabelle and Simon get there yet?

WC: DO NOT IGNORE ME PETER LUKAS OR SO HELP ME

BH: No, you three are the only ones missing , we haven't seen Simon since yesterday when he teleported out of the meeting. What is going on??

WC: You reached God Tier!!

FT: I did and no thanks to you, considering you pretty much left me for dead after your archivist killed me. Anyways, they will tell you, once they get there I'm supposed to start this whole thing.

FT: Hopefully it all ends soon.

BH: End what soon? Peter?? We did try to find you, but you were gone!

WC: Peter what did Annabelle tell you? Whatever she said is merely manipulation. You should know better, that's how she got all of us to play in the first place!

FT: She didn't lie, in fact she was right in what she told me.

FT: You are all so busy trying to stop it, but it's sort of pointless at this rate. The entities messed it all up beyond repair, maybe if we were quicker and didn't take so long it would be a different story, but as it stands.

FT: We are kind of doomed.

WC: You are not being funny.

FT: I wasn't trying to be.

BH: Peter even still there aren't any other choices to be done.

FT: There is, you should know it, that's your entire point after all. Be a guide and all that. What would have happened to you? If we won? Do you split up and I get my cat back and you go back to being a dusty old corpse in the basement of the institute?

FT: Ah If only, but it doesn't work like that does it? No, i'm stuck with the lesser and fake version of one regency bastard. Your only charm is that you remind me too much of my cat to want to get rid of you.

BH: …..

WC: Peter what the bloody hell is wrong with you-?!

FT: Not much. Anyways I just wanted to have the last word for once in our marriages.

FT: So shut the fuck up Jonah.

WC: !!!!

FT: You were the worst thing that could happen to me. Made me lonely? Sure, but not worth the effort, not worth the years of dealing with your brand of power, perhaps you think the same of me and that's.. that's actually right. Better even.

FT: You know, i actually thought that i loved you? In whatever capacity there was for us to have that. We fought, we split up, we made up and made out. Rinse and repeat.

FT: There were a few good things true, but now I realize that out of the two of us, you were always the one with the advantage, which was unfair. Let's say this is the last divorce, no papers no nothing, albeit it probably would be more akin to becoming a widow. Enjoy the new world.

WC: What the HELL?!

FT: Im throwing away the rings, i can't bring myself to care anymore.

WC: Peter I don't care what the hell is wrong with you, the moment I see you I'm breaking your spine on sight. What do you think you are playing at here huh? Oh look at you throwing a temper tantrum, if you could take your head out of that bloody fog of yours it would be delightful! But unfortunately you are the single handedly more dense human on this rock.

WC: Do i need to spell out to you, how much you are being an unreasonable ungrateful, dumpster fire of an avatar?!

BH: Elias

WC: Do i need to remind you who you are speaking with and what i will do once i find you? I'm going to shove so many memories of people into your thick head.

BH: ELIAS

WC: WHAT!?

FT: I hate you.

FT: No, that would mean I care about you still, no I don't care about you anymore i'm finally at the place i should be and i'm finally getting what i always dreamed off. You can both shove off to the new session once im done with this and fuck off to go and get another stupid idiot to serve you. I pray you have the decency to pick someone not from my family if they exist in the new earth.

FT: But i doubt it, you are a terrible creature and so am i, but i think that out of the two of us at the very least i was loyal, something you could never be. Do you know why I died by your archivist? I refused to answer what your plan about him was.

FT: You told me to help you while you were dying to reach your quest bed and I did, you wanted me to replace you and look after the institute I did. We made bets and games, but ultimately I always did what you asked. And I know you would never do the same, you just can't, because you don't want to.

FT: Im tired of this little stupid game between us, it has gone for too long and it has no winner. I'm tired of you. I have never mattered to you beyond what i could offer and that was fine, but then it wasnt and yes.

FT: I got jealous of your stupid sprite. That finally made me realize the truth, i dont matter and i never did. Not to you or anyone, so for that i shall thank you. You finally made me reach true loneliness.

FT: But still, even then that feeling has sort of faded away by now too, a lot of things faded away really. If you could be kind enough to do me one favour, it would be to tell Martin that it would all go to him once this is over, the forsaken will cling to him next if I'm gone. Maybe it just eats him, it would serve his boyfriend right for killing me first.

FT: I don't care about you Jonah, not anymore. Either of you. Please do not contact me ever again, albeit i wont be alive much longer for you to try to.

FORSAKENTUNDRA is offline.

WC: Peter come back here now! How- HOW DARE YOU??

[gwens-projects]

Day 19 - Theme Memories

So I’ve been around this fandom for a long time, not as long as some people, but since TPOM was still kicking out episodes. Today I’m going to talk about some of the memories I’ve made through this fandom.

Under a read more because this is going to be long.

I remember first when I was really small getting to watch Madagascar when it first came out. It was very blurry and pixilated because it was on one of those cam copy discs that my dad had brought home. It was fun, I liked it, but didn’t think anything about it really. The same happened with Madagascar 2 a few years later, and then after that I got my first exposure to TPOM when dad had a disc with the When I was a Penguin Zombie ep collection on it. I’m pretty sure I watched that disc on repeat for weeks in the car, I loved it but had no idea there were like actually other eps I could watch anywhere else.

Years after that, somehow I managed to catch the Return of the Revenge of Dr. Blowhole on TV actually in the midst of all the singing, we almost turned the channel but I was amazed that there were more eps than what I had seen before and we watched what was left of the episode.

I’ve never been someone who easily makes friends. I’m very quiet, nervous, and rather weird. 8th grade I made my first decent friends, and then at the end of the school year both transferred away to different schools. I was about...15 maybe? and I was crushed. I had never really noticed how lonely I really was until then, and so I started watching some shows on youtube I remembered I liked but never got to watch every ep of...Kim Possible, Lilo and Stitch, the Smurfs....I was looking for something Smurf related online when I accidentally discovered fanfiction, specifically Smurfs fanfiction that I thought was actually like a canon Smurfs book. This led me to exploring fanfiction a little more and then I accidentally come across some TPOM oneshot (written in Spanish that my computer translated) about Private? It reminded me that oh yeah the penguins was a show I liked as a kid, so I looked it up and started binging those eps. 

Watching those eps, I honestly felt the least alone I had felt all summer. Private was my first comfort character and at the time I found him super relatable. I also started reading a few TPOM fanfics. Season 3 still had episodes coming out and so that was pretty exciting. That August I started writing my first fanfic, A Trixy Situation, and drew my first fanarts. I also consequently made my first OC.

I look back at that first fanfic and the reviews I got and all I can think is “People thought this was good?” But at the same time, if it wasn’t for those kind comments back then, I wouldn’t be the writer I am now. A Trixy Situation wasn’t just my first fanfic, it was the first piece of written fiction I ever wrote and FINISHED. People’s kind comments spurred me to write and for the first time I really felt like I was writing for a purpose AND having fun with it. I was over the moon.

Granted, I did get my first critiquing review a few fics later, and as much as I cried over it...I will admit, it made me a much better writer. I still wish they had phrased it differently though.

Through fanfiction as well I made my first fandom friends. One of which I still keep in contact with even now 7 years later. She became my first best friend that I could truly say was my best friend and I wouldn’t have made her except through this fandom.

When I transferred schools from private to public in 10th grade, TPOM eps and writing TPOM fanfiction got me through it. It was...a rough 3 years of my life. I had 0 offline friends, but I had that one very good online friend who I would sneak chats to through a google doc during lunch and class breaks.

I remember when AHKJ came out and I’d have to stay off of tumblr because tumblr mobile wouldn’t let me tag and block spoilers and GEE WERE THERE SO MANY SPOILERS POSTED. 

January 2016 I gave roleplaying a try and made a slew of Private_Private_Penguin rp accounts across multiple platforms. I made a few connections and associates then, but none really stuck. However, I had a lot of fun rping as Private until the rp community more or less went silent.

Junior and senior year of high school and the first couple years of college, I was too busy and stressed to think of TPOM much. Then I noticed a new up-springing in TPOM rpers again. I watched a few eps and this time around realized that I really, really related to Kowalski now....Far more than I ever related to Private in the past. Granted, in the past I was kind of driven away from Kowalski because the fandom was so...well, let’s just say there were a lot of rapid Kowalski fangirls where it made me nervous to even approach the character. Private didn’t have as many fans so he was calmer to have as a favorite. But modernly, the Kowalski hype had died down and I finally felt at ease finding him as a comfort....I also think the age old “disliking a character until you realize there’s a lot of yourself in that character and that’s why you dislike them” theory applied to that as well...because he and I do have a lot in common, personality wise.

Anyway, through the new round of rping as Kowalski, I made some new fandom friends and through them was exposed to new fandoms and experienced a new love for the series as a whole. I also was introduced to new ship ideas and got new headcanons....And then I got back into writing fanfiction. My friend who rps as Blowhole, they got me into the Franski ship...Our rping was a slow burn enemies to friends to Kowalski muse having a crush on Blowhole. It’s a fun thing to look back at the old rps like “oh Kowalski started liking this ship before I did.”

After I got back into fanfic writing, I made yet another friend who IMed me about my writing and since then I’ve been co-writing with her on her fic. I also discovered a discord group where I ran into several fanguins who I recognized were around the fandom back when eps were coming out as well and I just sort of felt...at home? It’s the best way I can describe it. It was new but familiar all at the same time. Did we all share the same ships and headcanons? Heck no, but with such a vague canon that’s understandable and completely fine. It’s interesting seeing the different ideas and such and the joint enthusiasm we all have for this franchise.

I’ve recently started watching A Little Wild...Admittedly, I’m struggling with it but for its target audience, it would be a great intro into the franchise, honestly.  

I have so many memories from this franchise and its fandom, some bad, but mostly good. And now I just will take this moment to thank both the franchise and the fandom for the memories and comfort its given me through the years. 

[cuartosol]

bougierthanthou ha respondido a tu set de fotos

“I binged all Code Lyoko seasons and played Quest for Infinity and I’m...”

@hinazinnia what are their lives like in high school? How have they developed post XANA and Lyoko?

IM SO HAPPY YOU ASKED ill try to make this short and if you wanna know more you can always ask me! They are actually in college! Two disclaimers:

(1) im from spain, and my french is limited, i did my best in learning how college works in france, but im sure there are a lot of mistakes! (2) this takes place after the 4th season, ignoring evolution BUT maybe taking some cool ideas from there, even if i had only watched a couple of episodes

YUMI (19)

she went to study history to japan in her first year of uni, but felt disconnected from her peers and missed her life back in france. She returned to france and switched to a translation and interpreting degree, and thats where the story begins

she witnessed something (back in japan) that disturbed her and is related to xana but she refuses to talk to her old group of friends for some reason....

AELITA (17)

shes in her first year of bioinformatics (both her and jeremy skipped a year)

she’s been dating jeremy since highschool and kind of wants to break up with him. she loves him so much, but she is curious about forming a life outside of the same people she’s known since she came back to earth

this desire is also related to her feeling of being stuck in the same place, she’s been trying to discover new things (both realted to lyoko and her past, among other things) but feels she is often more busy with jeremy’s research than her own

she is the only one who had kept in contact with yumi

JEREMY (17)

1st year computer engineering-mathematics (2 degrees in one lmao)

he’s secretly been developing his own virtual world, offline and with his own techonology

he also feels kind of disconnected from his friends (can you see the theme of my story), but unlike aelita, he feels like things should return to “normal”, aka, how they were back in kadic. (i wanna focus his character arc on learning how to adapt to changes)

ODD (18)

1st years of fine arts (but he will change to cinema in the future, he was just to scared to specialize his studies so soon... he needs to learn to value his own work and have more self-esteem

he lives with ulrich (and KIWI!!!) and he is a fucking mess but makes up for it bc he knows how to cook

he is the one who has more friends outside of the group, however he feels like he is just passing by and doesn’t have any deep conections to any of them

ULRICH (19)

1st year business management. he l o a t h e s it but chose it bc he was lost as hell and his father was, as always, pressuring him

he teaches little kids martial arts and thats the only thing keeping him sane

he dated yumi from 15-16 until yumi told him she was leaving to japan and they had one of their fights. (he dated sissi out of spite which was a very bad thing to do... i think the lyoko warriors treat her really badly and id to make them work on that)

AND NOW ONTO THE PLOT,,,, Ulrich stumbles upon yumi on a morning jog and he’s like “what are u doing here i thought u were in japan” and yumi just. stares. and leaves.

so ulrich comes back home and rants to odd and odd says to tell the rest of the group for that night’s celebrations (its jeremy’s bday lmao). aelita tells them that she’s been talking with her but that she’s been ghosting her for the last month and she was acting weird before that.

she then gets a text from yumi telling her that william is in the hospital bc “he’s been getting worse” and odd reads it aloud and of course they go. everything is really awkward and they all have unresolved stuff (mainly that they were too young for al the shit they went through and none of them had found healthy ways to cope with it except ignoring it so being all together again is... yikes).

yumi is left alone with william and he attacks her and the gang help her just like the old times. jeremy is very convinced it was xana’s fault and wants to turn on the supercomputer to check, but they dont all agree (kind of pararell to their feelings towards turning it off in the show) and they part ways.

yumi knows more than she wants to say, beacuse she /knows/ that if she said it, it would make everything go back to square 1 and is it really their mission? is it their responsability?

i dont wanna say what is actually happening bc i had a comic/mini zine planned but that’s the main plot. just an overly complicated fic about changes and old friendships and dumb headcanons and a plot that is in fact an excuse to explore all the trauma that these kids must actually have lmao

if you wanna know more (about this au or just about my headcanons for the show), feel free to ask!

[polyamorouspunk]

My parents decided to divorce in February. We still havent been able to sell our house; me and my mom are stuck with my emotionally abusive "dad" and its only gotten harder to deal with over quarentine. Plus we're roped into a contract with the worlds WORST realtor so every day is a struggle to try and schedule showings. On top of that im dealing with the realization im a median sysyem, graduation, college signup, trying to find a NEW house, +more i don't have room for ... Im so tired punk....

Let me break this down with you one by one.

1. Your parents decided to divorce and from what you’re saying it was a good idea but then all of this happened and now it’s not. Statistically more women are likely to be murdered after leaving an ex not while with them which adds to the fact that leaving is hard! Especially when your intent was to leave and now you can’t? Terrible! Emotional abuse doesn’t leave physical marks either so it’s so easy to deny and say you did nothing wrong.... the people out there who are stuck with abusers right now are so strong and I’m praying to Satan you all make it out of this as best as can be hoped. You won’t turn out like him. You’ll learn from what you’re going through, even though you’d have been nice without the abuse anyway, but you’ll take what you’ve experienced and make sure no one suffers at your hands like you have. Just because we can see a bright side doesn’t mean something is worth going through. Fuck the silver lining. Shit sucks and I’m sorry.

2. You haven’t been able to sell your house and your realtor is shit. Ug, I hate contracts! Is it not enough to simply inhabit a space? Why must I legally tangle myself into this shit! I feel you there, our rent contract says that if we break it and move out we have to pay rent for it up until they can rent it out again- but who’s going to want to rent this place when I wake up with COCKROACHES on my FACE?! Personally I’m torn because I think this feels more like a home than my last place did (as in it isn’t giving me psychological damage) and I really like my room as it is but my mom wants to move and like I do but I don’t. I’ve only ever had like 1 showing while I was home and it was awkward. Especially when it’s like “yeah my parents are divorcing so bye house!” *sigh* parents fucking SUCK.

3. You’re in a median system. I’m going to be honest I don’t know what that means so I’m going to look it up. Oh that’s me! Yeah I feel that. Wow I didn’t know there was a word for that. My stomach is like... in knots.... I feel like I just found out I have a long lost sibling....

4. Graduation and College Sign Up: literally what is even the point of going to college anymore honestly we’re probably all going to die within the year anyway. Uh. Get good grades. I fucking hated college.

5. New house: moving into a new house is like buying clothes: you get serotonin for like 5 days and then you’re back to being miserable. No one wants to buy a house in this economy*

*except my mom

Anyway I’m sorry you’re going through all that. Everything is stressful. Remember it’s okay to take time offline for yourself if you need it, but it sucks when our environment is just as stressful as the Internet. Sending lots of of punk love, spikes to ward of negativity, safety pins to keep you safe, steel-toed boots to overcome your obstacles, and brass knuckles to punch your way through what you can’t talk out.

[overthelillies]

fic recs for my friends

yeah okay so most/all of these are davekat im sorry!! arranged in no particular order also some of them are second person I Am Sorry.

Your Interpersonal, Intergalactic Relationship: A Beginner's Guide (8,400-something words)

A beginner's guide to playing hopscotch, overcoming internalized homophobia, and falling in love with your alien best friend.

friends to lovers! p cute

So It Goes (56,845 words)

They managed to win the game somehow. He's not really sure of the details, but it's not all it's cracked up to be. He's stuck in an unfamiliar body with a thirteen year old little brother who's terrified of him.

Somehow, he is sure this is his fault.

// i have not read this one. but strider angst and davekat yes please

Red Converse (26,648 words)

Due to a seizure, Karkat Vantas now has to learn how to live his life with two speech aphasia. He goes to therapy three times a week, suffers from awful headaches, and tries to avoid people as much as possible.

Due to a traumatic experience, Dave Strider refuses to use his words, preferring to relay his snarky comments and witty banter through sign language and typing on his phone.

They meet in a waiting room.

//THIS IS REALLY GOOD Altho they do have sex just skip it dw i promise it’s worth it

how...did you tell your friends (7,906 words)

Unfortunately, you don't fancy your brother's suggestion on how to break the news to John...

There's no other way out of it, you're going to have to just tell him.

//set after homestuck, dave tries to tell the most oblivious person in the world and also his best friend (john) that he and karkat are dating and it’s literally so good

Dave Strider’s Stupid Fucking Jawline (11,607 words)

Generic high school AU. Dave's jawline is really distracting and Karkat does NOT have a crush on him (shut up, Kanaya).

//high school au. lovely. good eating.

Gray and Red (16,084 words)

In which you only see color once you meet your soulmate, and the first color you see is the same as your soulmate's eyes.

//SOULMATE AU SOULMATE AU this is kinda very Angsty (Karkat do be pining doe) it’s p good

We’re All Friends & Family Here (And Frankly, We’re Sick Of Your Shit) (68,000 somethin words)

It's been about a year since the big Fast Forward, and sure, things on Earth C aren't perfect for everyone. But they're fine. Really. It's fine. Everything is super fuckin' swell, and that's that.

It's not like one night is going to change anything.

//post homestuck GOD THIS. IS SO GOOD okay so this fic is mainly dirkjake being fucking stupid with rosemary and davekat and also a lil roxy/calliope in the bg and it’s long but!!!! so very good

Red Ties (10,705 words)

Dave Strider's eyes never turned the color of his soulmates. With his rare eye-color, there's next to no chance they simply share an eye color.

One day he meets Karkat Vantas.

//another cute soulmate au! again. love the soulmate aus what can i say

i’m at the combination dunkin donuts & urgent care (3,920 words)

Karkat Vantas is convinced beyond a doubt that his neighbor is some variety of murderer, until they actually meet in person. Highlights include blood at the laundromat, Dave's weird obsession with candles, and a box of shitty swords.

//this is SO FUNNY short n sweet i promise

the calculation (2,481 words)

the fic in which Dave gets the flu for the first time since before the game and Karkat takes care of him.

//this fic is really funny and also sweet

Start At The Beginning (9,304)

//post-homestuck, Dave and karkat falling in love. the ending to thsi made me cry

I Love Cheap Thrills (4,773 words)

You’ve been trading memes with an international pop sensation, and your drunk ass had no idea.

Classic.

//this one is verrie funnie

Locked Up (9,272 words)

Dave had always been the one best prepared for the game. He was able to handle the shit it threw at them and push it down a lot better than everyone else could.

It might have fucked up everything else about him, but that didn't matter.

He was fine.

He was always fucking fine.

//angst. very nice

I’d Tap That (oh fuck i didn’t mean to tap that) (17,041 words)

Karkat finds his old school bully on Grindr. Dave doesn't know how to shut up.

// really funny!! sorry if these are getting redundant i don’t remember the details about some of these

Pale as Bone, Pale as Water (5,305 words)

//another davekat sickfic

Apple Juice, Chips, and Bandages (5,335 words)

Every time he comes in he gets the same three things. A bottle of apple juice, a bag of chips, and bandages.

//really cute!! they’re liddol and they’re friends it’s nice

The Land of Blood and Childhood Trauma (8,242 words)

When two dreambubbles collide, two anti-social assholes are forced to help each other through it.

//not quite as Angsty as it sounds! it’s good

ecdysis (6,077 words)

Karkat goes through his adult molt. Dave does his best to take it in stride.

//so i actually haven’t read this thought I did but Uh have it anyway it looks good

Self Sabotage and Other Symptoms of a Damaged Soul (10,698 words)

//basically dave grapples with his internalized homophobia, etc. very good

turntechGodhead is offline (36,999 words)

//I’ve already ranted to you guys enough about this you know what it’s abt it’s SO FREAKING GOOD

A Ten Step Plan For Wooing Karkat Vantas, Featuring A Multitude Of Illustrations By Your Esteemed Authors, As Well As Tips For The Aforementioned Wooing (11,261 words)

Kanaya, because she's a saint, makes you a list.

The list is entitled "A Ten Step Plan For Wooing Karkat Vantas" and features a multitude of illustrations in purple pen.

"So we're doing this," you say. Your mouth threatens to twitch into something dangerously smile-shaped.

"Yes," says Kanaya. "We are making this happen."

"Hell yes."

//dave n karkat! they go on a date. stuff happens. it’s really good

Catching Colds on a Rock in the Middle of Space (15,887)

Rose catches a bad cold and it slowly spreads to the rest of the meteor crew. None of them are particularly good at admitting they're sick, let alone looking after themselves, but at least they're decent at caring for each other.

//rosemary and davekat! VERY sweet

Dave’s Girl (2,527 words)

The thing is no one knew anything more about "Kitty" other than her delicious cooking (Dave obviously doesn't want to share – ever) but the guys are more or less already in love with her. Drew insists she's probably this blond bombshell with big, blue eyes, all curves with legs that go on forever and a great rack... Practically everyone in the team has their own opinion.

//this is so funny and also im a sucker for these kinds of tropes so it’s great

Songs Made on the Meteor (27,762 words)

Dave makes music and they fall in love.

//on my to-read list! it looks good

Looks Just Like The Sun (12,231 words)

“Holy shit,” you whisper. Dave joins you at the window.

There are no stars left in the sky. Nothing but blackness and a faint soap bubble sheen.

“Is that a dream bubble?” Dave says.

And then it swallows you.

//okay. does this have explicit sex? yes. does it have a very explicit image? yes. HOWEVER (hear me out here) I firmly believe that if you whizz pass those parts, this is a very good fic with great characterization and fun banter. send tweet

aight happy reading

[hauntedtotem]

💗 🌠 🌟 🎁 🐇 🎵 🍀 😣 💥 🎨 😔 💫

💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be? 

my fiance bc we’re stuck long distance rn and I wanna see them ;^;

🌠 if you were in charge of the world, what would the world look like?

realistically? Ive tried to think about this alot but i don't know how to run the government or anything so I don't even know what that would look like in reality. one major thing i’d like to change is how predators get away with little to no sentencing. and the world would be much more eco-friendly, primarily i’d like to focus on restoring the coral reefs

but if we mean in a fantasy setting? i’d make certain areas have one specific weather all the time, like its always raining in this town or its always sunset at waterparks. weird ideal I guess? and winter would just not be a thing. or ig i’d make it so winter only happens in specific places. it’d just be cool to freeze time in certain areas.

🌟 what do you like about yourself? (must choose at least 3 things!)

nice eyelashes, good imagination (not so much when im awake, but my dreams are always really cool), Idk what else??

🎁 what never fails to make you happy?

playing Xenosaga, talking to my fiancé, or daydreaming/discussing BEN Drowned

🐇 what do you always daydream about?

mainly fanfics I read that were never finished, I try to make my own ending but its always impossible. and I like daydreaming about the ARG and how  characters would react in different situations, I like thinking about crossovers and what they would think about the similarities between them and other franchises

🎵 name 5 songs you love at the moment

Record Player

Will Wood - Better than the Alternative 

Kongos - You Are Strange

My Ordinary Life

A Good Look

Will wood - BlackBoxWarrior

🍀 if you could be any fictional character’s best friend/lover, which fictional character would you be?

I think we all already know  👀

😣 talk about some things that have been making you depressed/angry/anxious lately

my irl ex-best friend physically abused one of my friends and sexually assulted two of my other irl friends and there was a big falling out, but she says she didn't do anything wrong and tried to claim that I manipulated ppl into cutting ties w her? and she sent herself hate messages and tried to spread them around saying i sent it when i havent talked to her since February, which was months before my friends came out about the crap she was doing to them. and about two months ago she got a tumblr and even tho she’s been offline, idk when shes coming back and when she does she may find my current account and see that ive been talkin about her. which normally would be like, whatever- but she lives just 20 minutes away from me and has been to my house before, so I worry she might try to show up and start shit??

💥 what are some unpopular opinions that you have?

noo youre gonna get me cancelled 

well, I think all organized religion is bad so theres that.

 a lot of people say “jeff the killer was 13 in his story, but you cant draw him as 13 bc it was written in x year and hes a human so he ages, so hes 30 now and you have to portray him that way” and I think that's really stupid because hes a fictional character. hes not real, no other fandom goes by that rules, idk why people are treating him like a real person? like, if you took a character from a show in the 80s that doesn't mean the character is now 40 years older than they were in the original work, because theyre just a character and the characters don't age in real time bc theyre not real. you can make content that takes place before, during, right after, or years after his initial story, you don't need to portray him as he would be if he was a real person in todays time. I've seen people attack young artists and generally being really aggressive about this and I don't get it

🎨 what do you always doodle when you’re bored?

I honestly haven't doodled since I was in school, anything I draw now is for full drawings and not just fun private doodles

😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? does it help?

write a bunch of angst in my head, sleep, but those don't rly work, the one that works for me is just kinda go completely offline for a week and play games.

💫 who inspires you?

for art, its Krooked-glasses, nelnal, akorhaphi, funamusea, pengosolvent, ghost, ehxkor, par0llel, junji ito, and a couple more I cant remember rn. some of these are people on DeviantArt that aren't active anymore

[exhoe-imagines]

the green room → jww

summary → watching wonwoo’s twitch streams had always been something you’d enjoyed, but never in a million years did you think you’d run into him so casually at his daytime job

word count → ~2k

genre/warnings → gamer/streamer!au, florist!au, gn!reader who is oblivious to flowers and their meanings, random overwatch references that i had to guess on bc im clueless djfkdsjfsd

a/n → SO @gamerwoo did not think i could attack her,, hence this fic was born !! i pray it will wound her the way i am hoping for !! also any references to overwatch were made from the content i see about it on her blog/faq so thank u rocket for unknowingly educating a dumb bitch like me 😪

“Anyway, I’ll see you guys tomorrow at the same time.” The boy smiled into his webcam, giving a shy wave to the screen. His brown eyes were hidden behind his round glasses, but they did little to cover up the flustered blush that covered his cheeks. It was obvious, as usual, that ending a stream proved to be difficult for him -- the awkward void of noise from his game commentary or the sound effects coming from his computer speakers leaving him in uncomfortable silence as he said goodbye.

You giggled softly as the stream turned black, before his offline screen popped up, displaying his social media and schedule links in a thin blue font. There was no need to click on them, at least for you, since you’d memorized his handles and stream times months prior.

To call you a fan of gamerwoo_96’s twitch would have been a bit of an understatement, one could say. You were quite picky with who you spent your free time watching, especially when it came to hour long streams. Besides Wonwoo, which was his real name, only a few other lucky gamers had you regularly on their accounts -- notably, yutodagames and pcy92, but your casual viewing on their channel was nothing compared to your dedication to Wonwoo.

There was something about how natural he was at playing, that you and his other couple hundred regular followers greatly appreciated. He didn’t seem dedicated to becoming big on Twitch, even showing signs of embarrassment when a large number of people tuned in for his streams. However, no one, not even himself, could deny his channel grew rather quickly.

You’d stumbled across his account one Saturday while looking for Overwatch players, and you’d been hooked ever since. He wasn’t as loud or annoying as other guys his age on Twitch, but he wasn’t too quiet either, where it made it uncomfortable. He commented on things every now and then but stayed focused and would go silent every few moments. It was a nice balance, allowing you to concentrate on the gameplay, but also get to hear his thoughts, and very deep voice whenever he voiced his opinion on something.

Of course, you’d be lying if you didn’t say his looks kept you on his channel as well. He was cute, that much was obvious. His loose white shirts and tousled hair always gave him a laidback look, that contradicted the focus he’d put into his gameplay. Wonwoo’s nose would scrunch, his eyes squinting behind his gold glasses. It was downright adorable, and completely uncalled for considering he was already the prettiest gamer boy you’d ever seen.

Months later, you were still tuning in for his morning Saturday stream -- a perfect way to start your weekend if anyone asked you.

You clicked out of Twitch and closed your laptop before rolling on your back, letting out a deep sigh as you sunk into your bed. You had a list of errands to run, but you’d been putting them off, deeming Wonwoo’s stream more important. However, now that it ended, you had no excuse for putting off your tasks.

Begrudgingly, you got out of bed a few minutes later, trudging to your bathroom to get ready.

Mentally, you’d already planned your schedule for the day. Grocery shopping and getting gas were first, then gift shopping, and lastly, meeting your friend later in the afternoon to celebrate her birthday.

As expected, the first two errands were nothing special, and you got them done rather quickly. However, the next one was not as simple. Your friend had always loved flowers, and you wanted to get her a big bouquet when you greeted her. The only problem was, florists in your area were rare, which meant you had to drive out of town to find one.

“Thank god I don’t have any cold groceries,” you mumbled, before setting off on your detour.

When you finally pulled up to The Green Room, you were pleased with what you saw. It certainly seemed worth the drive, beautiful baskets and arrays of flowers decorating the outside of the small white shop.

Making sure you had your keys, wallet, and phone on you, you made your way to the entrance, noticing it seemed to be empty from your view through the large windows. Shrugging it off, you pushed the door open, a little bell sounding your arrival.

“Good morning,” a smooth voice from behind the counter greeted you. For a second, a slight feeling of recognition passed through you, and when you turned to face the cashier, you understood why.

Wonwoo stood there, a white apron tied around his waist, and a polite smile on his lips. Your eyes widened and your voice was caught in your throat, something he noticed quickly.

“Is there anything I can help you with?” he asked, probably viewing your silence as confusion.

You had to be seeing things.

You shook your head quickly, squeaking out a response. “I-I don’t think so.”

Wonwoo nodded, looking back down at the book on the counter he had open. It was almost finished, and you swooned internally.

A bookworm too? you thought, how perfect is this boy?

Not wanting to stare too long, you scurried towards the back of the shop, trying to make yourself look busy as you racked your brain for an explanation as to why Wonwoo was running the one flower shop by your house. He’d never mentioned where he lived or where he worked, obviously, but never in your life did you imagine that out of everywhere in the world, he was a mere hour from your apartment complex.

What kind of fucking coincidence is this? you screamed internally, barely paying attention to the flowers as you passed them. Speaking of, you couldn’t wait to tell your friend -- she’d gotten sick of hearing you fangirl over your “little gamer boy” as she liked to call him. She was truly in for a treat now, as you’d probably never stop talking about the fact that you met him.

There was nothing you wanted more than to go back up to the counter and talk to him, but you had to get the flowers you’d come for.

The only problem was, you had no idea what to buy.

Your friend had told you all her favorite flowers, but there were so many, and with the thought of Wonwoo at the front of your mind, there was no way you were going to be able to remember them all, let alone know what they looked like.

Letting out a sigh, you decided to pick out a few flowers that looked pretty, and would maybe look nice together. It was the best you could do, and you only hoped your friend would appreciate the effort.

Sadly, it must have been pretty easy to spot how clueless you were, since, after a few minutes of picking different flowers, footsteps sounded near you.

“Who are you shopping for?” Wonwoo asked, as he stood next to you. His proximity and the natural warmth radiating off his form had you stuck in place, unable to escape.

“M-my friend.”

He hummed. “Special occasion?”

You nodded. “Her birthday.”

At that, Wonwoo visibly held back a wince. His eyes darted to the flowers in your hands before he looked back at you. “Maybe white lilies wouldn’t be the best choice then.” His voice was reserved, like he was worried about criticizing your choice. “They’re usually meant for funerals,” he awkwardly explained, pushing his glasses up his nose.

“Oh god,” you groaned, “I really have no idea what I’m doing here.”

Wonwoo chuckled at that, visibly loosening up at your response. “It’s alright, it’s more common than you think.” He held out his hand, sending you a smile. “I can go put those back if you want me to help you make a new bunch.”

You let out a sigh of relief. “That’d be great, thank you.”

Wonwoo nodded, taking the flowers from your hand, his fingers long and warm as they brushed against your palm.

Hearing him ramble about flower types a few moments later was one of the greatest things your ears had ever been blessed with. You’d always liked his voice, but hearing him explain the different flowers and their meanings was the most you’d ever heard him talk at once, and it was amazing. Clearly, the shop was a huge passion of his, which you thought fit his personality perfectly.

“A couple of these alstroemerias, for friendship. Some yellow and orange gerberas too, maybe.” He was clearly mumbling to himself by then, plucking different flowers from around the shop and fitting them between each other. His skill was visible immediately, the bouquet effortlessly beautiful as he crafted it without a second thought.

By the time he was done, you were in awe. He sent you a sheepish smile as he led you back to the front counter, setting the flowers down as he moved behind the cash register.

“Thank you so much,” you said, pulling out your wallet as he told you the price. It seemed unusually low, compared to the price tags plastered across the store. You brushed it off, assuming a sale was happening or something.

“You’re really good at this,” you mentioned, as you picked up the bouquet, careful not to mess up all his work. “I wouldn’t have expected that.” You said the words before you could catch yourself, eyes widening as you looked up at Wonwoo.

His eyebrows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

You internally cursed yourself. There was no going back now. “I um, I’m used to seeing you on Twitch.”

You waited for the awkward response that would make you feel like a creep, but Wonwoo just smiled bashfully. “Really? I’ve never had someone recognize me, besides some friends and family, of course.”

You looked at him slightly in shock. “Are you serious? I watch your streams all the time,” you admitted, feeling some heat spread to your cheeks.

“What’s your username?” he asked curiously.

You told him, expecting he would just nod, but instead his eyes widened in recognition.

“You have the D.Va icon right?”

You tried not to openly gape, but the shock was too strong. Wonwoo, your favorite streamer, remembered you?

“Y-yeah I do.”

He smiled, glad he’d recognized you correctly.

“Well, maybe I’ll see you at the next stream then?” his tone was hopeful, and you nodded almost immediately.

“Of course.”

He nodded, and his usual awkwardness when it came to saying goodbye became apparent.

“Here um, take this, on me.” He grabbed a flower from one of the baskets behind the counter, and handed it to you with a blush.

You took it, mirroring his flustered expression. “T-thank you.” You smiled shyly before picking up your bouquet and waving him goodbye with your free hand. He tilted his head in response, and you quickly left the shop before he could notice how hard you were crushing on him.

You were able to hold back your scream of excitement until you made it to your car, when you slammed your hands against the steering wheel with a squeal.

However, nothing compared to your excitement when your friend noticed the flower Wonwoo gave you, a knowing smirk spreading across her face.

“Wonwoo gave you that?” she asked, grin growing as you nodded. “Did he tell you the meaning?”

You shook your head, and her expression brightened.

“Well,” she sing-songed, “if that ranunculus means what I think it does, it seems like a certain gamer boy finds you very attractive.”

[arfidy-cat]

Update:

I wanted to be more straightforward with my progress. I’m a really bubbly and positive person offline, I also act similarly online. I really like to focus on the highlights of my journey. On the other hand, I don’t want to paint a picture like everything is just awesome and my ARFID is cured.

I still struggle. But I’m so happy I’m at this point where I am now - actively trying to get better than when I felt stuck and didn’t know how to change my eating habits.

Also, I my arfid was on the really severe end of the spectrum. My progress might be one of your baseline starting points. Wherever you are, I hope your journey to eating better is going well.

On the other hand, I have completely transformed my eating habits! Just not as much as I would have liked. But I’m so excited I made it this far. But I still need to try harder to get more fruits and veggies in my diet. I still go to restaurants and want to get the same thing every time. (But better than not wanting to go at all/only having an appetizer!)

It takes awhile to relearn years of disordered eating. I’m still actively trying to make choices that support that. They aren’t easy choices. It wasn’t just like I just had to try foods and then I liked it! It’s a learning curve with many foods.

Bottom line: Compared to where I started, hell yeah im doing so much better! And the progress is irreversible! Once a new food is integrated in my diet, it stays!