#im just pretty sure that if people Dont want that to see discourse abt this

[foxxfaggotry]

i am so fuckinf sick of people saying transphobia against trans mascs doesnt exist! yes it motherfucking does !! i have experienced it first fucking hand, as have many other people!!!!!

in fact, i’ve experienced multiple kinda of transphobia! people cant tell “which way” i am transitioning (im just growing) so i am assumed to be transmasculine abt 45% of the time & assumed to be transfeminine like 45% of the time and the other 10% people clock me as something other than binary and run with thats. it all exists! trans mascs experience a specific brand of transphobia, so do transfems and so do those who are outside that and theres overlap in all!

its very dull old discourse to trot out and im so so very over it ugh

[sysmedsaresexist]

i don't want to publically share it on our account, but we also had an experience with being convinced by others that we could have RAMCOA trauma. im not sure how relevant it is to the discord drama, but heres that!

the biggest thing i saw so much was '(x symptom) can only happen to ramcoa systems'. it was no one talking about their traumas or experiences, but saying that different symptoms could only happen in ramcoa.

we went digging into our trauma when we weren't ready to, and were absolutely terrified of what we wouldn't. we weren't able to trust anyone, who knows who could have done that to us?

it wasn't until our psych told us that we don't have signs of hidden memories, just dissociation caused amnesia, that we finally were able to relax.

its not that there is a problem with ramcoa systems or them discussing their experiences, not any more than any other system talking about ours. but the way that the symptoms are talked about

there's no problem with, say, a ramcoa system explaining their symptoms as a system. that includes the ones that that trauma caused. but there's a pretty big problem, in my opinion, with claiming that those systems are only possible with ramcoa

like with hc-did, we had the vast majority of them. and when we were being told that other symptoms of ours are signs of programming, we were just so scared

i don't really get what the discourse is about right now. but i i have seen quite a few ramcoa systems claim that certain symptoms can only happen from ramcoa, and that it's misinfo and harmful to ramcoa systems to say otherwise. and seen them be really attacking of others who have those symptoms or even similar ones.

like i had an ex-friend who was programmed by an ex. i saw evidence, explicit evidence of this being the case and it was confirmed by their psychologist. but i also saw people claim that if it was just one ex it wasn't able to be ramcoa, it needs to involve multiple highly skilled abusers. also, they couldn't have the symptoms they were having without it.

but they did. if not programming because that's ramcoa specific, then something indistinguishable from it according even to their psych. something caused by the exact same methods used against ramcoa systems.

so yeah. bit of my experience. sad to see it seems pretty common. i mean, if it werent for our psych, it would have probably ruined our life.

once again this is not an issue at all with ramcoa systems or them talking about their experiences. that ex-friend of mine told us all about theirs. they were under the impression it did count as ramcoa, i dont care to discourse abt if thats right or not, and they were telling us about their experiences.

they were telling us about specific symptoms that we both had that were very similar, but theirs was a symptom of ramcoa and ours weren't. and we never had a single problem with that. when we first started talking about their experiences, they told us to be mindful that it is not a good idea to question if we may have ramcoa trauma we dont remember. specifically BECAUSE its easy to trick yourself into thinking you might.

theres no issues at all with ramcoa survivors talking about their experiences. there just is an issue, a pretty big one in my opinion, where ramcoa systems decide certain symptoms of DID are exclusive to ramcoa. i have never seen any evidence to ever back up any of these claims ive seen. but i have seen that so many of them are things we as a system experience. and if it weren't for our psych, being told that must mean we have ramcoa would have probably ruined our life

Thank you so much for sharing ❤️ I'm so sorry you've gone through that.

I really appreciate the way you've worded this.

I really want to remind people that talking about the validity of one thing (in this case, triggering anxiety) is not downplaying the validity and severity of another thing (in this case, extreme and severe abuse).

They're two separate conversations, and they're equally important and real in their own right and context.

[remix-of-your-guts]

insisting that you're 'literally trans' over and over sounds kind of like the terf line about how everyone's non binary, so given that and your post history it looks really suspicious

okay i legit can't tell if this is bait or something because?? what???? i said i was "literally trans" one time because someone asked if radfems reblogging my post meant i agreed with their beliefs and i chose to interpret their question in good faith so i gave a legit answer. i haven't bothered to respond to a single comment from obvious terfs because im not into giving them the time of day.

i'm not sure how me simply existing as a trans individual is agreeing with the argument that terfs make to try and erase the existence of us that "everyone is basically nonbinary because gender isn't psychological at all it's just what's in your pants" (im assuming that's the line you're talking abt and if not then idk what that is) and that's frankly a bizarre leap to make. especially because i don't even call myself nonbinary, im just a genderqueer (as in my gender is inseparable from my queerness) transsexual man.

and just what the hell is suspicious about my post history? i've been posting about trans rights and trans-inclusive feminism since i started this blog, though i can't guarantee every hot take i've had on incredibly niche intra-community discourse aligns with my current beliefs (which mostly boils down to "internet discourse is stupid" and idc)

i don't understand the phrasing here as though i'm fighting widespread accusations of transphobia or transmisogyny when this is literally the first comment i've ever gotten insinuating something like that??? of course that's not including the terfs saying "so close bestie" right before calling me a "retarded tra" but since when do we base our claims of who is and is not a terf on what the terfs themself say, instead of what the person in question has actually said/done? plus making fun of how im "close but missing the point" because i said that a trans woman may have a bit of internalized misogyny is hardly saying i clearly agree with everything they stand for (in fact it's fundamentally about the fact that i dont). if thats what you consider being claimed by terfs, and if being claimed by terfs is what you consider the deciding factor in whether or not someone is one, then basically every blogger who's ever mentioned general feminism, periods, or being a woman on this website would be a terf (even trans femmes cuz ive seen posts from them accidentally get passed around terf circles without them knowing who op is). especially every transmasc on this website would be a terf then considering that they're so bizarrely determined to get us to join them while being violently bigoted against us and dehumanizing us (obv not to the extent of trans women but still it's hardly an effective recruitment tactic) and allying with the people that explicitly want our extermination.

i'd once again like to remind everyone that all i did was point out a woman who happens to be trans accidentally veering into perpetuating misogynistic stereotypes (something that i will call out even quicker when cis women do it, which they do all the fucking time) in a way that made it clear it wasn't a big deal and expecting no one except my followers (which i'm pretty confident in saying none of whom are at least obvious terfs) to see. hopefully we can all agree that trans women are not immune to accidentally perpetuating misogynistic stereotypes- not because of their gender but in spite of it because all women can be misogynistic because MISOGYNY 👏 IS 👏 NOT 👏 STORED 👏 IN 👏 THE 👏 GENDER

and for the record even in the tags of the og post i was saying that it's really sucky that people totally are going to overreact to this and give dylan disproportionate hate because there 100% is a double standard in how society at large responds to these things, and that terfs are going to use it as "proof." but i don't think that just because accusations of misogyny are often weaponized against trans women we can never engage in good faith criticism of them??? in fact i think that makes it very important to help each other make sure there isn't any grain of truth terfs can latch onto (by which i mean being conscious of misogynistic patterns for everyone in our community, including anyone who considers themself an ally to trans people, not unfairly policing just trans women).

however obviously i regret making the post now since it clearly just encouraged the transmisogyny hate-train. and has caused my asks and notes to be flooded with transphobic bullshit directed at dylan, obviously, but also at myself. seriously, i've been deleting all the anons that are from terfs (like ive always done cuz they've targeted me before) but it's been some nasty shit. and it's really fucking annoying having to block every one that crawls over here to tell me why i'm apparently retarded for being trans and supporting my trans sisters. (sorry about the r slur- their words not mine)

okay done talking abt this forever now

[euthym1as]

MONDAY MORNINGS AT THE GOLDEN HOUSE.

why am i writing this in tumblr's text post editor instead of a google doc? bc im bonkers thats why

uhhhh this is my interpretation of what happens to childe in SAGAU when we fight him

this is gonna be like half ex-chili and half god/alien reader + a very damaged childe it can be read as shippy either way [reader is not traveler but does the things traveler does ok i dont want discourse here abt childe/traveler ships]

content warnings: implicit sadomasochism, mention of vomiting offscreen, violence, manipulation and lying by the reader, general brain fuckery, the only child that gets hurt here is childe i promise

MONOCEROS CAELI;

Every Monday, at 4 A.M. Every morning, he woke up in a cold sweat, arm muscles burning, head ringing in pain. Childe- no, Tartaglia- knew that the nightmare was back again.

Childe wasn't his old name anyways, it was a cover used for Liyue, and now that Liyue was in the past he had no need for it anymore. Names were to be discarded when they were done with their use, that's what the Fatui taught him.

The one person who had said that name so softly, like it was something to be held and cherished instead of a thick lie on his tounge, was not someone he could confide in anymore. Not after what happened. He clenches his fists on his bedsheets, anger rising in his chest. Why? Why did the two of you, the people he dared love, care for, betray him? Why set him up for failure behind his back and come to destroy him when he was down?

The two of you were filthy, filthy liars. A funeral consultant. An outlander. He grits his teeth. Gods. Gods parallel to the one he served, one the Lord of Geo in the land he walked upon, the other a power just as alluring and dangerous as the Abyss. He remembers the first time you had fought, how could he not?

You had been trying to save Liyue from Osial. A futile mission in his eyes at the time, and his confidence, looking back, was unwarranted. You not only mastered the elements to your will, but you fought like you had fought him a hundred times before. It was... familiar to you. Like you anticipated his every move.

There were times that he knew he should have hit you, he knows it. You were unleashing an ultimate attack move he had to marvel at, and when he struck, it was like nothing hit you at all.

The first time you fought, he accused you of being evasive, saying all you ever did was run. He ate his words, and also the shards of shrapnel from the floor above him when you both descended down below. You didn't run. At least, you didn't run away. You had this dogged determination to see him lose, to be the one to make him yield.

That lit gasoline in his veins, setting his whole person loose in a fire of reckless combative abandon, letting his years and years of slaughter culminate into his best fight yet. He was alive.

And he still lost. The anger that crushed him that day also spurred him on to train harder, become faster, get stronger. One day, he would have a rematch with you, and win. He felt it in his bones, you were a challenge to him now. A challenge he would fight until he beat you.

The first nightmare was that Monday, a day he expected to sleep soundly. Not the case.

It was you, but it was also the adeptus Xiao, some alchemist with green hair, a redhead who he was pretty sure was Diluc Ragnvindr, and a kid- a kid- with goggles on his head. He had never seen some of these people in his life, and yet- they fought him as valiantly as you did. They gave their all to take him down, and take him down they did. It's like none of them saw him as a person, just an enemy to clear. He expected this from the adeptus and Diluc, both had a simmering hatred for him, but the kid could have been the same age as Tonia. He seemed so eager to help, even if that helping was casting a fiery circle on the ground that seemed to make his pain worse. Every time someone hit him in that circle, it stung like one hundred of the blows he just received. As you walk up to his barely conscious body, you break a piece off his weapon, a shard of his Foul Legacy. It broke something inside of him when you snapped it off, and his consciousness went dark.

That dream was not an isolated incident. Like fucking clockwork, his dreams came back to haunt him of his loss. Always you. The people that fought him changed, but you were always there, watching, waiting to pick up your spoils of war. The look in your eyes never shifted, a cold calculating gaze of confirming a job was done. He'd seen it before, of course. He wore it daily. It was... strange being on the other end of it.

The worst permutations of this nightmare involved kids no bigger than Teucer. His bones were pulled against his will as he said the same thing he always did. Why could he never change his role?

He didn't want to lay a finger on them, Tsaritsa be damned. These were fucking children. He wanted to ask you so badly what the hell was wrong with you when the four of them giggled up the steps, but his mouth couldn't open. He had to watch as the four of them crossed the invisible barrier that made him draw his swords and made him sick to his stomach.

He hopes this is quick and painless for them. He wishes them all a better afterlife in Celestia. One of them he recognizes- Qiqi, the zombie kid from the pharmacist. He doesn't want to hurt her. He doesn't want to hurt any of them.

He sees Teucer in their eyes.

As the battle starts, a strange four leafed clover pattern materialized above his head, and he doesn't realize it's an attack until he hears a BOOM BOOM BAKUDAN and his ears ring as his head snaps to the ground. What the fuck?

The kids proceed to beat the shit out of him. It's the most mentally distressing nightmare so far, because he doesn't want to hit back, these are kids, but the explosions hurt and the Anemo ninja got his knee, and he can't hit them because they have a shield, so they don't even know what they're doing-

How cruel are you? How heartless and soulless did you have to be to bring kids to a battlefield? When you came over to loot his limp body once more, he hopes the anger in his eyes said everything you needed to know.

Then he awakens, and exhales as he realizes it wasn't real, he's okay, the kids are safe asleep in their beds and not forced to fight for someone else-

A memory pangs his consciousness. He was about the same age as the Anemo user when he fell into the Abyss. Forced to fight, at that age. He remembers how the monsters had screamed as they were defeated. Part of him wonders if they heard his final scream of agony.

He gets up to stagger to the bathroom and get this out of his system. When he looks up in the mirror, he bangs his fist on the side of the sink.

It's just a nightmare, he tells himself. His face pales when he sees a burn on his neck and shoulder, and he can count one, two, three, four blotches making it up. Like a clover.

He lets Ekaterina know that morning he wouldn't be out on business that day. He would be recovering from an injury. As he laid back in his bath, he thought that had to be the worst of it.

A week came and went, and he went to bed on Sunday hoping for a dreamless sleep. He was granted no such mercy.

This time, it was Zhongli. The nerve, the absolute nerve of you to bring him here, after everything that had happened. The adepti-blooded of Liyue were behind him, Xiao, Ganyu, and Yanfei- the latter he had only met on diplomatic occasion. He saw the Pyro vision on Yanfei's codex and braced himself for more burns, more searing heat in contact with his skin. The fight was torturous, and he couldn't hit any of them once because Zhongli used what was left of his godly powers to make his adepti shielded with something Childe couldn't break, no matter how hard he slashed or shocked. It was hell, and it was worse when he saw who used to be his friend walking outside the fight with you, re-casting his shield but not getting into the fight. That infuriated him. When he saw an opening, Ganyu went down. Then Yanfei, and when the adeptus correctly summarized it was his turn next, Childe broke the floor and they both plunged to the bottom, unharmed. They lunged at each other, both of their intents to kill pushing through every slice of their blade.

Xiao had one goal: Protect Liyue and Rex Lapis. Everything else was secondary. He fought with such ruthlessness Childe could feel himself bleeding out of his abdomen somewhere, vision blacking out around the edges. Xiao stepped back, and that is when Zhongli stepped forward. He crossed his arms and his eyes glowed a brilliant amber, that even in the face of death Childe was still enraptured with. He tried to open his mouth to let the words claw out of his chest, but no words came. The sky darkened, and a meteor crashed through the roof of the Golden house and crushed him whole.

The morning after that hellish dream, his entire body ached like he had been stuck under a tree the entire time he was sleeping. Everything hurt. He barely had it in himself to move his arms. He should be enraged. He should feel anger at his own helplessness, but where there is anger there is... something else.

He moves his foot and pain shoots up the nerves in his ankle. His breath shudders, because the pain freezes him in place, forcing him to pay attention to his current state. There's... a feeling there he can't quite place, something that zips by his mind before he can identify it. He moves his foot again. The pain snaps, again, and a yell rips from his throat. He feels himself on the edge of consciousness. Maybe pain made sense. Maybe this was some sort of fucked up punishment from Celestia for attempting to drown a city and steal a Gnosis.

Or maybe he had been fighting for so long the pain was a part of him now.

He turns inward on himself, confronting the darkness in his mind, seeing the Abyss stare back.

Does this pain fuel you? he asks himself.

Like nothing else was its reply.

When the next nightmare came, he was ready. You, as always, were present in the dream, your unrelenting stare was part of his subconscious now. He could live with that. He would learn how to tune it out.

What he doesn't expect is to have to face himself.

You enter the fight with eyes brightened, excited to see the two of them spar. Unstoppable force versus equal unstoppable force. The bloodlust in the eyes of your comrade is promising. He's ready to fight.

"Let's see you try and beat this." you say evenly, letting the two of them take the field.

He's hard to fight, he thinks to himself, and the eeriness of fighting a version of himself that does not recognize him and treats him as just another enemy is unsettling. He sees the combative spirit in his own gaze as he lowers his mask down to use his delusion. The other Childe doesn't use his. How strange.

They fight for what seems like hours, but only really is a few minutes. He's somehow outmatched by his other self, the one that doesn't have any recognition of who he is, and it terrifies him. How? How is this possible? How is everyone you brought to break him down so powerful? Why do you always win?

He falls against the floor and yells in agony and frustration. Damnit! he thinks. Not this time, not this time.

It's too late. The ley line blooms, and you take your rewards. He feels as if the Tusk is ripped from himself, and folds into the pain, curling up on the Golden House floor, tasting blood in his mouth.

Waking up that time was hell, and he notices a blue glow on his torso as he comes to consciousness, and he lifts his shirt to reveal a Riptide mark pulsing on his chest. His breathing quickens, how was this possible? Why were these nightmares so prevalent? How did they leave marks when he woke up?

These continue throughout the months, haunting him, hurting him, turning some part of him even more sour and shriveled.

He goes off to Inazuma to look for the Balladeer, and when in Inazuma, the two of you meet again inside the labyrinth. The hordes of monsters are nothing compared to his nightmares. If he focuses on finding the master of Shiki Taishou, he can ignore the way you kill just as much around him. He builds a friendship with Xinyan to avoid the tension between the two of you, even though nothing happened, it was a dream right? If he concentrates hard enough, everything is fine.

When the three of you exit the domain, the punk rock girl being so glad to have made two new friends, you and Childe exchange glances.

"We haven't hung out much after Liyue, huh?" he asks, masking the nightmares' effects on his psyche.

"Correct." you answer coolly.

"Thinking about that rematch, comrade?" He forces a smile on his face.

"I was thinking you could become my traveling partner." You brighten, holding something blue and pink behind your back.

"R-really?" He wasn't nervous, no, he was just... you were so powerful, and what if his nightmares came back when you two were traveling together-

"I mean it! I already travel with you anyways!" you say, tone cheery for the implications it held.

Childe freezes in his tracks. "What?" he asks, afraid of the answer.

"Come home, my darling. Come back to me, and you never have to do that again." you say, walking forward.

"I thought you said-" He gets cut off.

"I want more." A golden glint in your eyes catches him off guard as his own psyche locks down, freezing him out of his limbs, taking away his ability to scream. Just like his nightmares.

There's a piercing fear in his blue eyes before they shine golden and the shooting star burns out. He's here, with you now. All of him. As he should be.

Monoceros Caeli shines a little brighter in the sky that night.

[misterbitches]

Hello! @flootweed replying to the post from before. the long format was killing me. why does tumblr look like this...

I haven’t watched episode 8 yet...or have I? If it’s the most recent one. No.

Is the hornbill a bird? It probably is but I have a terrible memory and I’m dumb so. I skipped the last few weeks because I’m scawwed. How are you liking it? I did see someone say that the hornbill makes sense (without knowing what it is...at all) bc heart transplant patients only live like 5-15 years after but someone in those comments pointed out that he was so young when he got his and that’s pretty rare so he has a higher likelihood of survival. Frankly, this is the only way I will proceed. Since when did shows ever care about the heart transplant health? Never and it needs to stay that way!

What did we think of ep 6? LMAO. I need opinions! And omg it makes me feel special when I can point things out to people because I so...rarely get to LOL. Editing is like one of my favorite things ever so I can be super particular about it but I try to do the thing you do when you’re supposed to see if it works within its context. I’d like to go in with scissors and glue but alas. 

THe mic covering....the rustling....it’s like guys...please. Ironically the audio today wasn’t great. I don’t know why. IDK if you watch c-dramas but I am not even sure what’s worse between them because they dub their dramas. But actually no it’s best to have the dubbing because even tho it is painful they have to put a lot of effort into it. LOL. 

Right? @ Aey! It’s just weird if they would show us more about what he’s done instead of saying he’s done sth bad and not even explaining that....like you could even do some shitty exposition. I think if he is to be a true villain then we really need to be privvy. All the warnings make it seem like he’s a fuckin’ serial killer so when we get the scene of him at home it’s like....actually this is really serious? Maybe his pain is like...for a reason. Althought you won’t even TELL US WHAT HE’S DONE WRONG BESIDES BE JUST FUCKING WEIRD AND ANNOYING! So from what we have it’s just a realllllllll fucked up sad person lol. god i forgot about the dinner! and i totally agree. he really needs them to succeed. i like your theory because it would make the scene where he like blocks the twitter user make more sense. he also says they dont really know each other etc so it’s realllllyyyyy probable that he just sees it as a way out. if not then we shall pretend u wrote it :)

god yea i wouldnt say it is art but i also guess we technically have to since it is technically. in the way that technically performance artists are artists but mostly i uh technically ignore them. Also one of my fav BLs is called the best twins. If you do not know what it is I will not elaborate further.t 

i want to know more abt poli sci majors lmao but they sound DRAMATIC/ hopefully most ppl in ur cohort arent losers! 

hahahha i understand. there was just a thing on twitter about DSA and then the day before about reading discourse. the same thiings. over. and over. and over. and over. we are our own worst enemies but also our own best friends? but i hate tankies and that wont change. but hasan’s a decent guy. he said sth abt black ppl during biden’s primaries in GA or whatever and i was like chill. but he’s insecure and has adhd which means ur more open to being wrong and changing otherwise u will suffocate and die. 

and totally about hiding fuck ups. i’ve tried really hard bc of organizing IRL to like...be honest, question, etc but also like...approach it naturally? because if you’re trying to be perfect and so worried you’ll fuck up you don’t realize that puts  more stress on you, makes you seem like a robot, and could potentially not make you realize the mistkaes you made. also if we’re privileged in certain spaces there is just no possible way we won’t get something wrong. im light and i know that honestly any way to speak up on colorism is going to be difficult and that’s a space where i have power so i just have to figure it out. we should be uncomfortable because we have to sit with unpleasant feelings and sort through our own whatever. that just makes the next time even better and people can trust u more.  i think some people sweat it sooo much or maybe they think their personal life and what theyve been through is more the norm? on the other hand people can be sf reactionary in the worst way and idk what their issue is. there was also a user who said sth very inch arresting about tankies which i thoroughly enjoyed (how like violent lefitsts or tankies / ppl who are like ooh a gun whatever just want to be violent in another space so they have shit tendencies from jump and nothing of substance which i think i agree with tbh fo ra lottttt of ppl. like their anger is actually like “no im about to beat that ass” instead of what we actually want to get done) 

sort of in the same vein re: taking it easy...we coudl all be more understanding too. to slow it down like you mentioned about not being privvy to fucking eveyrthing and saying anything on our mind. i saw this person talk about y2k which was a huge deal while happening bc it was the turn of the millenium (bruh were u even alive?) but this twitter user grew up in a super super SUPER religious household and was like why do ppl make jokes about Y2K it was insanely traumatizing? though my first instinct was confused ive tried hard to like look more before i judge especially thanks to a friend of mine. turns out that with the further reading the more we found out he was just really traumatized; it was very common in religious households to be afraid of 2000. so we could have come at him with no understanding and he could have thought that everyone had the same experience with that year that he did. his feelings sit precedent though but i think it was just very hard for him to fathom. 

i didnt reply bc he didnt need that and what could i have said? he’ll see what the truth is with exposure and unfortunately this was something he really did go through. 

and that’s what makes most people think others could be over the top. because it sounded ridiculous but then it was this huge traumatic thing that we could have never known about. so maybe when someone sounds like actually crazy they have an explanation? of course some ppl are just batshit or annoying but that’s anywhere not just leftists it’ just means more i guess when a ~~librul is annoyed~ but it can be easy to want to make fun of ppl too. lmao.  basically what i am saying is the internet? especially twitter? for leftists? in this economy? bitch it’s the wild west out here.

i am 29! idk if i said it or not. i am OLD u probably werent even born in the year i was talking about wah. i know not old-old or old at all but compared to you i’m due for a colonoscopy.

omg i hope u can get vaxxed soon! are you wfh rn? i hope ur also not in a bad state as in state state not state as in ur being :| bleh what a fucking time. it sucks that you have to fucking do work. well unless u like school. which i hope u do. i just assume everyone hates it cos i did lmao

was it the lindsay ellis drama? that bitch is dumb. if there was other drama oh wait the drama i was referring to it all happened on the same day. idk book twitter that well but i saw something from someone who was abt that shit and wowie! the american people are not that.....intelligent to put it lightly.

i’ll get better. ppl tell me they miss me and im like aw. i have insanellllyyy bad insomnia and a lot of stuff happened this year HOWEVER I SLEPT FOR TWO DAYS FOR 8 HOURS AT A REASONABLE TIME. im a new woman.  anyways you too! i hope ur not too burnt out with school. we just dont know when the burnout is or we just dont know we are burnt out until we are. the panaramiciccici hit and all the things i was ignoring kind of just fell on me and sooo much happened at once. and frankly it’s hard to take care of ourselves. lord. 

Like if you aren’t interested in expanding on the issue in a way that hasn’t been done before all you gotta do it like… spread resources and donate if you can. I dont see the point in having to say something about every issue especially if you (not at you specifically just in general) aren’t immediately impacted by the issue. Like is the 14 yr old white marxist named sarah on twitter really gonna have meaningful insight on anti-asian violence ?

this is part of why i cannot telecommunicate. i dont want to do shit on the internet. i am able bodied so i know that this time has been of such ease for other people. but mentally i just can’t. i don’t have a comment on hand like that and i hvae no desire to engage with ppl that way. i am a super super super solitary person but thats bc it’s MY time so when it’s like all this effort with other people i dont ever want to be alone. it’s the same with the way i approach filmmaking. it isnt a sole thing so i hate it not together. that’s part of how u can get so sucked in and repeat doom scrolling. i was in this webinar last may after [redacted] and this black woman prof said “read with a community and talk” because otherwise she said we are torturing ourselves. you can’t carry that weight all on your own. unfortunately i hate zoom, discord, slack, signal, whatsapp, facetime. you name it this panera has made it evi.. L

you make a really excellent point. i think the young young gen zers are really really just interesting because it’s like this whole new world for them with leftist politics and they just can’t grasp the horrors of the world and the kind of freedom being a leftist can bring. and so many people don’t grow out of it. those people so happen to be the “least productive” in terms of how much time they spend IRL withe these issues. naturally, younger kids are gonna have a harder time. they are not as mobile as well so the internet becomes this place. but then it’s this echo chamber. and many times just things posted without sources. and social media NEEDS that to exist.

i think of the irony of leftist kids on tik tok and while i am happy it’s reaching them it’s just....different. very different. the growth of social media is so good but also so fucking sad, it’s too much! i think the point about not writing everything is major. even i have to do this which is part of the disappearing.y ou need to detach and make sure your head is on straight again. but when you think eveyrone has to be privvy to every thought and you can’t just sit back....which twitter and social media doesn’t encourage. you have to join in. that’s often why when i have something to say it is dense because i don’t feel like repeating it. ever. lmao ust ever. i cant pay attn. social media is a fucking minefield for my brain u can get so lost in it and absorb it but once u start talking you may not be able to stop. 

i think a big part of that is it not being a leisurely thing but sort of just in our lives always. this sounds like a grandpa rant but ykwim. We dont have to see the same thing over and over again. And eventually it gets sincerely diluted or its diluted bc of capitalism or whatever. Or if theyre very young or maybe they don’t have like the greatest way of sharing the knowledge? then it can be butchered. I hope this is making sense...i’m talking beyoond the boring surface-level milquetoast shit. i see really ahistorical stuff on there from leftists (like this thing about NK + africa and it being a beneficial rship as opposed to a um not beneficial one. and it isn’t.  beneficial but this young black girl was talking abt it and noname rtd and i was like it’s just too complex. there’s no good/bad here just bc it’s not america. dont get me started on this.)

but Lol that was kinda off topic but I think what I meant in my last reply about not turning off the voice in my head is about when I consume media, not necessarily when I’m online talking about. Even if I have criticism for something, I’m usually pretty chill when consuming fandom content bc I think being serious online all the time is kinda boring. Like sometimes I’m analyzing theme and shit but really most of the time im memeing.

exactly.........gotta laugh. thats why sometimes im like i cant think lmao. unfrotunately i have been ARGUING with ppl on the internet for rly no reason when  i could have replied to ur very nice fun wholesome message. i love torture. i miss memes.

“ i think the people who get the least enjoyment out of that are those so obsessed with getting upset with anyone thinking outside of their lines as if it equates to them “ EXACTLYYYYY

kekekekeke im glad u got it. it’s like with conservatives throwing around snowflake. now im beginning to question who the real complainers are. 

LMAO exactlyyyy. i posted a screenshot of this writer from twitter saying that exact thing. Like first of all, I’m...an adult? and if you are as well uh? i’m sorry for you but are we 12? But how is it affecting u this viscerally? And if it does why dont u...do...research? pihgofuaipoajghou but honestly everything u said. we’re trained to go into it with nothing. i was only around ur age when i started to get more serious about this stuff but you’re like lightyears ahead of where i was at 21. did i say this but i’m in iww and literally i can tell u in 2016 i did not think 2019 me would be in a union bc i told my friend in a train station that we don’t need unions. i was 23...but the thing is i didnt know what i was talking about. at all. and i knew i didnt know and she knew i didnt know and now i am the clown.

also yes at critical engagement. i had to learn so much through experience and this is tuff that i coudlnt be shielded from. there’s an empathy you kinda have to develop and this understanding that you move through the world as this person who is “nowhere and everywhere; nothing and everything” so i’ve always had to think about things differently just to survive. that’s also what can drag a lot of people towards it like theres so many black kpop fans bc i think a lot of the pain in SK can be mirrored (sort of) through our history. and theres currently a history now but it had to be forged. uh what was my point oh yea however i wouldnt have been able to move further if i didnt have my background to go off of  bc i knew something was off when i started getting into all these things (ill give u a hint) but if i had no prior knowledge and didnt have to think about it then the critical approach is either stale or stupid. 

i had to research but i dont understand how ppl are so bold with little to no research and understanding? thhey just inherently know with also like ZERO experience in what they need experience in. engaging critically means “how i see the world” with dashes of trying to be open adn understanding or whatever. actually that’s another thing like being afraid of criticizing things bc theyre foreign to you so u give it a pass (like we discussed) but it doesnt hAVE TO BEEEE JUST REAAAAAD and then take all the info ur teensy brain and apply it. be a normal human being and dont be fucking rude and racist. thats it! u can complain abt literally anything without being a dick.

as we start with LW and end with LW.....what do we think (i asked this already) omg please share wbl thoughts i THINK i know what ur talking about. well it could be two things; their rship when they came back and the physicality and then pei shou yi. i almost dont even want to use my brain to fucking look at that. i think wbl can get away with more bc of visual~*~*~* reasons (like literally, the look of the show. there’s more space to get lost in the frames. many thai dramas are a lot more literal? this isn’t the right word but it’s very heavily character focused particularly bc of $ i think) though good production also underscores flaws so i am also wrong. but like do u know what i mean? u have to kinda focus on it? or maybe it’s just cos like.....ur so used to it in thai bl idek. i’ve seen tw bl ofc. 

look i swear i will justify this forever bc there are some things we miss right but if u feel like someone’s a bad actor....theyre bad. it’s about tone movement etc etc etc and since most thai bl productions have 0 interest in that....well. they take these newbies and put them in these situations. we dont understand thai but if we see them and we’re like “wow this is really bad” then they’re bad lmao. IDC i will never be like cos idk what theyre saying NO WHY HE LOOK LIKE A ROBOT???????? DOES HE EMOTE? why is he CRYING WITH NO TEARS? and it’s not even a total requisite to cry with tears(i mean for me it is) but it’s just like what is happening on ur face right now young man????????

painful.

the inflection stuff is very valid ooh good point tho but that’s only a part of the piece. plus we get used to the way they communicate. like the ppl from sotus were prtty bad. i dont like that show but thats an ex of ppl liing the actors and the person i thought was better other ppl dont think that? well apparently hes a shitty guy but. um. so when theres decent acting its so glaring.

although i must say even tho i dont care for 2gether anymore and would never like to be reminded about its existence (only bc i just cringe lol) i honestly....didnt think bright was a bad actor? but people keep saying he is and i am much more inclined to believe them than myself. though i am not often dickmatized that could have been it. until he opened his mouth and ruined it and then i stopped paying attn.

although honestly i’m so much more critical than i could be positive. i have ben stumped for the last day about how i wasnt mad at his acting in the show. is it me? is it him? who’s......the wrong one.....(me) 

oh shit they have been denied? i haven’t been paying attn to whats been going on recently. i just got into it on MDL because of snowdrop. sometimes i literally cannot engage bc ill just be like alright well im black so this power button in my head is going off when ppl talk abt that shit. back in the day when kpop jawns were saying some real outta pocket anti black shit (now everyone is slick with it) it’d always be THEY DONT HAVE GOOGLE THEYVE NEVER SEEN A BLACK PERSON but really it’s like no...maybe they are just racist? that’s ok too.

also the past 2 weeks have been um atrocious bc how fucking easily people fell into the pit of white supremacy and started to turn their ire towards black people and making a competition between our groups just like they wanted. it’s not about the women who are dead anymore, who were sex workers, their womanhood, being asian, being poor anymore. it’s about how much black people get attention and why people only pay attn to us. i am not feeling very generous this week for ppl to excuse that hsit.

on a lighter note, ppl say that abt the whole husband and wife thing. i dont know how to explain how angry that shit makes me but maybe it’s because i do not want to think of my body in relation to a fucking penis at all hours of the day. if bls could kindly not do that it would be nice lmao 

yes there are a lot of those. who are only there to gawk lmao. and just idk worship bc of the cult of personality thing bc of how weird and open they have to be as actors. some of the others are people who /think/ theyre really smart (i think im asmart but i also think i am very dumb and i have adhd to prove that MEDICALLY!!!) but are actually not? or their observations arent great? or idk if they are they arent interesting? but i think well..........we have more refined palettes :P

jk also theres just different personalities. you and  i mesh more bc we have a lot of the same beliefs and are coming from the same place. that makes it easier to understand as well. i really try to remember that but some people are really weird so. again just...the perception of certain things even down to acting skills. but i also dont like.......believe this genre can really do anything at all. on one hand i want them to do it right bc it’s a piece of work so they should. be proud of it. cos most things arent advancing us bc representation and culturalism are a lie bla bla. it’s just that when the depictions are negative or not done well it adds to the problem as opposed to the things that are well done are fairly benign and can’t really pull us back (perf example is the black panther film. i woudl definitely not say it was transgressive as a literal work but visually it’s just stunning. and it’s sad that it’s stunning and surprising but still with basically an all black cast of mostly dark people abd like what it means in the zeitgeist yes. it’s also just a good movie. but it’s still imperialist prop and unfortunately and this is fucking pathetic to say it “opened eyes” in other countries where they hate black ppl and ignore their own racialized minorities HENNYWAYSSSS a better ex is moonlight except moonlight isnt mainstream and is indie tho...still thru a funnel of capital bc a24 but who cares bleed the fuckers dry is my motto. my point is moonlight is both a great work and doesnt bring any failures to the table and its existence helps in ways outside of art but they arent the defining things giving us material advancement sooooo i mean it’s complex (this is my conclusion to everything um guys it’s complex) 

er i had one more point in conjunction to above. oh yea so i like dont need all these extra things to make it progressive. like people really want more women in the show and i am honestly like i really dont. i dont want them to actively do this. if they cant do it naturally then let someone else do it. i am not asking for more bc i dont want it from them. when something comes along i embrace it but i do not see why women should be represented when the genre RELIES on patriarchy. there is no complete satisfying existence for the women in these series. i dont want it. i dont ask people to show us~*~* or respect~* like fuck no the people who make it make it and hopefully more will make it in the future but i will not beg bc THEY DONT WANT TO DO IT SO WOULD FORCING IT MAKE IT BETTER? just fucking leave them out entirely. that’s the answer if theyre gonna make nasty female characters then those bitches can geaux. we have other plcaes to be. booked. and. BUSY!

[periwinkle-sky202]

Your own ocs

tmy favorite female character

Out of ALL my ocs,,, thats so hard. I adore Mary, Isabelle, Chords, Anna, and Ezra a lot tho!!

My favorite male character

*points at the jones twins* can i get more of these little traumatized bitches even tho jasons nb-

Man fuck it in adding this

my favorite enby character

Jason, Artie, Kas, Them. I love these guys. Theyre all wild

My favorite book/season/etc

Im gonna do this as ‘what story i’ve made is my favorite’ and thats probably the old fantasy world i made with my friend!!! It was so much fun to make and develop, i love making stories and worlds with people

My favorite cast member

Haha thats me

My favorite ship

I could write an essay on the ships i adore.  And i will they’ll be under a read more at the bottom,

A character I’d die defending

Uhhh None!! My characters have unlikable qualities and fuck up all the time! My favorite ocs are assholes! I dont feel the need to defend them, some of them are bastards and should be addressed as such

A character I just can’t sympathize with

Im not sure! Not all my characters are sympathetic at all, but I have next to no characters that I like,,,, despise? Besides Gerald whos a shitty abusive dad but thats abt it!! Fuck gerald. I don’t ‘sympathize’ with many of my characters tbh!! I feel bad for them sometimes, but they usually get good endings!

A character I grew to love

I SWEAR JASON HAS THE BIGGEST GLOW UP IN TERMS OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND REWORKING LIKE MY GUY IM SO SORRY YOU WERE ORIGINALLY JUST AN EDGY ‘gonna kill people cause im evil’ BUT ITS OK THEY’RE BETTER NOW.

My anti otp

obv anything goin against my ocs sexualities and also anything just,,,, grody i Despise. its never happened but i amn ready to fight

ALSO

I dont think i can ever forget the time i was talkin to someone(dont remember who) abt Hell Office and the comment was made that jonas and jamison would be cute together and let me tell you that was a one hit ko for a multitude of reasons. The main one being that it made me realize if Hell Office was an actual story with a large enough fandom,,,, some people,,, somewhere,,, would ship them. No Matter What I Would Say they are two white men with a power imbalanced relationship, someone would ship them. the discourse would be Unbridled. My sorrow unlimited. Good thing im bad at focusing long enough to make a popular comic and jonas is in a Healthy Relationship that is on the list below!

Also jamison is aro/ace but that feels less important than the fact hes the worst esp to jonas

ANYWAYS to the ships i like

Jonas/Phoenix

Obvious one! Love these dumbasses. i just think they’re neat and im glad they wound up together. i cant comment much on phoenix’s side of this since they’re not my oc, (Owned by my pal @theartsyskeleton !!)  but its a great thing for Jonas. Jonas is a grumpy jackass who up until now didn’t know what he was going to be up until he met Phoenix. fuck, i didnt either!! but they’re together and i think they’re great together. Phoenix’s kindness works well with Jonas’s. y’know. Grumpiness. and they make each other happy!! its fantastic!!

Maia/Glacius

i wont go completely off on this one but i love them!!!! they’re great parents!! again! cant comment too much from Maia’s side bc she belongs to Willow, but Glacius saw a lady who was genuinely kind and he fell in love so fast, but just didn’t say shit bc he didn’t wanna bother her and he loved being her friend!! This ship is just.. friends to lovers in the sweetest way

Jason/Desmond

THEY GOT THEIR ISSUES BUT,,,, They’re good. or. they try to be good! I like this ship because im biased they’re just. two hurt people trying to hang onto someone they can trust who shows them love. On Jason’s side, they’ve been on their own for so long and has never had anyone see them as anything other than the ‘weird person down the street’ or ‘childish.’ Desmond is someone who 1. Showed romantic interest in them, 2. treated them as a mature equal, and 3. was just,,, the first person they made an emotional connection with in a long long time. On Desmond’s side, he’s spent his whole life trying to look after everyone around him and keep them safe from people like Xiana and Isla, and Jason is one of the first people that have been willing to protect him, and they make him feel safe and heard when he wants to talk/vent about everything hes been through.

Their relationship definitely isn’t perfect, though, and I know this! Jason has convinced themself that Desmond is a perfect person who can’t be wrong, and Desmond still tries to take care of everyone and fix everything around him, including him not wanting to tell Jason things they’re doing wrong and just wanting to help them out of every hard situation they’re in.Their relationship isn’t great!! They’ve decided each other are their only emotional support and want to go through everything with each other so they’re also pretty clingy! But! I still think this relationship is interesting and i like them they just need Work

[kadywicker]

marvel

The first character I first fell in love with: wjfasdsadf this is so sad but tony. i was baby when im1 came out and i really liked it. cant say i feel the same now im more neutral on the whole tony discourse at this point

The character I never expected to love as much as I do now: uuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhHHHH hm. venom maybe? i didnt kno much abt venom and then i was like ah yes my idiot alien child

The character everyone else loves that I don’t: a great question. hm. honestly i dont know i dont have any marvel characters i really hate other than like. doctor strange. but no one likes him. and then obviously like thanos etc but again theyre meant to be disliked

The character I love that everyone else hates: movie charles i know this is a bad opinion but i love him okay i know hes a liberal i know hes dumb of ass. also keep in mind i havent seen dark phoenix and dont plan on seeing dark phoenix. also if we’re talking dudebros then i LOVE carol. fuck everyone else i respect HER.

The character I used to love but don’t any longer: tony again

The character I would totally smooch: bucky….. also thor. also t’challa. also jude law is hot so i unfortunately do have to say yon rogg which is the worst opinion i’ve ever put on this blog. he sucks. as a character. the character sucks. but, by law, im required to bc hes jude law. OH also gamora. love u gamora. AND VALKYRIE….. FUCK HOW COULD I FORGET ERIK KILLMONGER…………… im just rlly in love with a lot of pretty people alright

The character I’d want to be like: i want to look like bucky does that count. uuuuuuuh u kno what? magneto. legend.

The character I’d slap: u kno im not actually sure. actually also yon rogg

A pairing that I love: at this point steve/bucky and charles/erik r rlly the two thatve stuck around

A pairing that I despise: god. so many of the canon ones are so fucking annoying. uuuh. natasha/bruce, vision/wanda. tony/steve. MOVIE steve/sharon i kno theyre good in the comics. 

send me a fandom and i’ll tell you…

[chemicalbrew]

Current Moods

a bit sad because i’m done with SoM. not because of the story or anything (though i keep seeing people tall abt the poor translation cutting out like a third of it and i’d love to see the full thing, esp what the fuck happened to dyluck... although i guess i’m not supposed to know) it’s just that

i dunno if i’ll find anything like it again and i really want to, but the mana series seems to be a mess and no one’s sure what to think of it... i wanted to see Sword of Mana bc i am biased towards gba games but i’m not convinced with this title

i guess Legend of Mana looks pretty cool and i can try it but first

monthly internal yelling about CC is in order except i’m just watching more vids and reviews and discourse because i really dont want to play it sorry

it’s like ‘ok one more vid and i can turn on that longplay i’ve kept in my sights for months’ but i keep watching other people’s stuff and it’s cool

but SERIOUSLY i want to see more mana games for myself but i’m so unsure... oh well SD3 exists (but it’s HUGE AAA)

also i miss CT but that’s to be expected (i had three dumb vague dreams involving it today because im a dumb nerd. but also probably bc i read this right before falling asleep. it’s a good read)

and also i probably should be playing earthbound but shhh

also i dropped final fantasy six. shit. now that i’m done with som i absolutely GOTTA get back to it wow?!

...holy shit ff7... but then again it has three disks and i still dont know how multidisc ps games emulate which is one of the smaller issues i have had with cc so

+ illusion of gaia which i also keep fucking forgetting abt....

and terranigma, i actually looked it up a little bit and it sounds nice (i mean the font looks just as awkward as iog but hhh im nitpicking)

[necropsittacus]

turin gwindor & fingon

turin:

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life 

hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang 

this question is really weird for mebc i identify so much with turin that this whole concept feels.weird.that probably doesnt make a ton of sense but.is turin incredibly pretty?yes.would i fuck him?probably not.hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuffbest quality: probs that he like.ugh im gay and bad at words but like.when he kills forweg and realises what he did he doesn’t even go back or try to claim it was a tragic accident?its just “he was going to hurt that woman so now he’s dead. you’re going to be as bad as the orcs, it doesn’t make a difference to me if you’re on my side of the war.”like i think he cares so mcuh abt justice and abt not hurting people who dont deserve to be hurt?and then his temper or circumstances get in the way and ??Aaaaaaaaaworst quality: i cannot shittalk my beloved son omfg honestly his temper or the extent to which he just does things without thinking through the consequences?imo partly because once hes said something he feels like he cant back down from having said it and fuck the consequences he is going to follow through (see the “soldier with an elf king”exchange w sador, and then him wanting to go back to beleg but being too proud)ship them with: ...it might be easier to ask who i dont ship him with in all honesty. beleg, nienor, finduilas, gwindor honestly, ..other people but thats more Lets Project All The Trauma than a ship properbrotp them with: see ship section, its the same lmao.i rly would like to see turin-house of feanor interaction after that one lil note in unfinished tales abt the fall of nargothrondneeds to stay away from: honestly imo most of the people he killed on purpose kinda deserved it?he and brandir are Really Not Good For Each Other tho so im gonna say himmisc. thoughts: i would die for turin he is the actual light of my life and i will fight anyone

gwindor:

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would banghogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff ????i dont think abt this very much and thats p much just what sprang into my mind Right Now sobest quality: loyalty defs.like he sticks by turin even when it is actively disadvantaging him to do so (imo as much out of loyalty to beleg as bc of turin himself?), he somewhat stays friends with finduilas and tries to make sure she’s happy even when it’s clear the relationship is over and he’s p bitter about it he doesn’t ever really get mad at her for leaving?worst quality: he does get kind of bitter (which id be a complete hypocrite for complaining abt lmao) and passive aggressive, and telling people who turin was against his wishes was kinda rudeship them with: happiness and also turinbrotp them with: above+finduilas+mayb fingon?that is a Possibility.also beleg.needs to stay away from: dragons.also sadness.misc. thoughts: he needs a blanket pile and stable support system

fingon: 

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would banghogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuffbest quality: fingon is one of the few just /nce people/ in this book like hes a fucking ray of sunshine and he Cares too Much and thinks everythign is going to be okay and then it ISNTworst quality: please stop making impulsive decisions it wont end well for uship them with: honestly i dont have that many like Intense Ship Feels abt fingon? like russingon is cute but my goose-noises intensity feelings arent normally there yknow  brotp them with: aredhel, not being deadneeds to stay away from: ANYTHING THAT WILL HURT HIM THIS POOR CINNAMON ROLLmisc. thoughts: sry i dont have a ton of fingon opinions actually?so u dont get bitter discourse here lmao

[hinanaha]

1-170 :)

lmfao james i swear to god

1: How tall or short do you wish you were? i wish i was 160cm cause i wanna be short and also then my weight would be healthy lmao2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not) we all know i want a norwegian forest cat, and also a lizard would be cute3: Do you have a favorite clothing style? long flowing dress or skirts w blouses4: What was your favorite video game growing up? pokemon5: What three things/people do you think of most each day: my cats, what i will eat and how much a wanna be picked up and spun around one day6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say? it wouldnt say anything it`d just have the crying laughing emoji like deepfried on red tape7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]? u didnt say anything for this so ill state my opinion on meat which is yuck8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic] none rlly fit me tbh9: Are you ticklish? yea….. 10: Are you allergic to anything? nope11: What’s your sexuality? lesbian (femme lesbian specifically)12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa? coffee, tho i like all13: Are you a cat or dog person? CAT, im very picky abt dogs14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson? elf15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber? idk like i dont rlly watch youtube for anyone inparticular i just watch whatever16: How tall are you? 170cm17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? opal, just cause its my middle name and opals are my favourite gemstone18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] about 50kg (ik im underweight if anyone is concerned btw im fine its a sideaffect of one of my medications)19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits? yes20: Do you like space or the ocean more? i love sharks and jellyfish so the ocean, however i am fucking scared of octopuses21: Are you religious? nope, never have been22: Pet peeves? men.23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]? why does diurnal sound like urinal, but i like the day so that24: Favorite constellation? the pot thing cause its easy to spot25: Favorite star? the biggest one there is26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls? i dont rlly see much of a use for them27: Any phobias or fears? arachnophobia, and aslo the dark 28: Do you think global warming is real? um yes definitely, because im not stupid29: Do you believe in reincarnation? i mean there aint even close to enough science backing or not backing it so i couldnt say, im neutral 30: Favorite movie? idk31: Do you get scared easily? id say more anxious then scared, like im a very jumpy and shaky person32: How many pets have you owned in your lifetime? idk like 20+ (chickens count)33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.] yes34: What is a color that calms you? peachy colours and whites35: Where would you like to travel and/or live? i would love to hike somewhere someday tbh i think itd be rlly magical, and i love nature so much36: Where were you born? Melbourne37: What is your eye color? blue grey38: Introvert or extrovert? introvert39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs? to an extent40: Hugs or kisses? both at the same time41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now? honestly kinda wanna see my nan rn for some reason42: Who is someone you love deeply? definitely my mum, she is the most important person to me43: Any piercings you want? i want a nose piercing, maybe a small decorative ring44: Do you like tattoos and piercings? yess i love them, i rlly want a tattoo someday45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so? no i dont want to46: Talk about your crush, if you have one! i don`t have one47: What is a sound you really hate? i cannot stand the sound of animals licking themselves48: A sound you really love? wind chimes49: Can you do a backflip? i could if i wanted to50: Can you do the splits? no51: Favorite actor and/or actress? ashley johnston52: Favorite movie? this was already asked lmao53: How are you feeling right now? pretty chill but also kinda sad for no actual reason54: What color would you like your hair to be right now? im feelin a burgundy colour tbh55: When did you feel happiest? nothing specific rlly56: Something that calms you down? music57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] i have ADD also p bad anxiety58: What does your URL mean? mango boba yum59: What three words describe you the most? anti-social goblin witch 60: Do you believe in evolution? i do biology so yes61: What makes you unfollow a blog? they post stuff i dont care abt or triggering content62: What makes you follow a blog? pretty picture63: Favorite kind of person: someone who makes me feel special/loved64: Favorite animal(s): cats, bees, lizards, crows65: Name three of your favorite blogs. idfk tbh66: Favorite emoticon: im not on mobile but the sparkling heart one67: Favorite meme: i dont have a favourite68: What is your MBTI personality type? Infp/intp69: What is your star sign? taurus70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog? no they cannot71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most? pyjamas72: Post a selfie or two? icbb73: Do you have platform shoes? yes74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself? i have a double jointed shoulder on one arm75: Can you do a front flip? yes76: Do you like birds? yes chirp 77: Do you like to swim? no lol it sucks i cant breath well when i swim and it freaks me out78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you? ice skating, i love it, would take up lessons if they were available79: Something you wish didn’t exist: flies80: Some thing you wish did exist: giant domestic cats81: Piercings you have? just simple ear piercings82: Something you really enjoy doing: doing creative things w friends83: Favorite person to talk to: u already know its the council 84: What was your first impression of Tumblr? funny mem85: How many followers do you have? 168 (i had 470 on my old blog)86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes? ye but not always87: Do your socks always match? yes88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely? yeah89: What are your birthstones? idk90: If you were an animal, which one would you be? surprising but id be a fox not a cat91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be? lavenders baby92: A store you hate? bendigo iga, its shit93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day? 1 otherwise my hands shake94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds? neither tbh95: Do you like to wear camo? ii guess if it looks good96: Winter or summer? summer97: How long can you hold your breath for? a pretty long time actually, once held my breath for 3 minutes underwater98: Least favorite person? my dad99: Someone you look up to: no one100: A store you love? i dont like kpop anymore, but the owners of happytown were always so nice to me so i rlly like that store because of that101: Favorite type of shoes converse102: Where do you live? austrlia103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why? im vegetarian, but i eat mostly vegan food, i rlly like animals and dont like the idea of eating them, also eating too many animal products can be unhealthy 104: What is your favorite mineral or gem? opal105: Do you drink milk? ye but not on its own106: Do you like bugs? yes, silly creetures107: Do you like spiders? im scared of them108: Something you get paranoid about? i dont rlly get paranoid much, but i sometimes get rlly paranoid something be watching me109: Can you draw: ye, reblog my art pls @yumeuwu110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked? i cant remember lmao111: A question you hate being asked? i cant think of anything112: Ever been bitten by a spider? nope113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach? yeah its pretty nice114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days? both i guess,  tho respectfully to their matching seasons115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now: id cuddle my future gf rn :`)116: Favorite cloud type: .. w… poofy cloud117: What color do you wish the sky was? yellow would be pretty, but not piss yellow cause that`d be weird118: Do you have freckles? yea faint ones119: Favorite thing about a person: their lips, lips pretty120: Fruits or vegetables? veggies121: Something you want to do right now: sit on a warm hill in silence122: Is the ocean or sky prettier? sky123: Sweet or sour foods? im more of a savoury person124: Bright or dim lights? dim, sexy125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature? i mean it aint impossible126: Something you hate about Tumblr: pointless discourse127: Something you love about Tumblr: nice people128: What do you think about the least? idfk129: What would you want written on your tombstone? oh my fuckin god she fuckin dead130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now? no one, but im always ready to punch something131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself? im very very selfless, which is nice but also makes me rlly sad sometimes132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures? nah133: Computer or TV? computer134: Do you like roller coasters? hell yeah, they fun135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness? i get motion sickness136: Are your ears lobed or attached? lobed137: Do you believe in karma? i guess138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are? probably a 7, like im p cute139: What nicknames do you have/have had? uhhh anepeace (die mr flanagan that nickname is so ugly)140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends? no, not that desperate yet (no offence to those who do have them im sure ur lovely)141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink? yeah i see a psychologist monthly and also psychiatrist 142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others? id like to say good143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help? recieving144: What makes you angry? assholes145: How many languages do you speak fluently? 1146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries? girls ;3147: Are you androgynous? nah148: Favorite physical thing about yourself: i have nice shoulders149: Favorite thing about your personality: i try to be considerate of others 150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person. idk151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose? honestly fine w this one152: Do you like BuzzFeed? some things153: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner? [If you have one.] dont have one :((154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons? nah155: Do you like to play with others’ hair? yea, prefer people playing w my hair tho156: What embarrasses you? anything that puts me at the centre of attention among strangers157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious: loud noises158: Biggest lie you have ever told: i dont rlly tell lies so notin159: How many people are you following? i cbb to check160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)? 7000+161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)? 1162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)? idfk163: Last time you cried and why: i cried cause i saw a floofy cat164: Do you have long or short hair? short hair165: Longest your hair has ever been: hip length166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon? most religious views ive heard make no sense when compared to science so i dont rlly believe it167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created? nah168: Do you like to wear makeup? sometimes169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds? no im weak170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully? ye