#transandrophobia

[librius]

thinking abt that uptick in transphobic content thats like "sorry for misgendering the he/they that [supposedly feminine traits]" and they always mention boobs. they always mention how Big these men's breasts are. idk it fucks me up like if youre transmasc and have boobs youre expected to bind all the time every day, even if you arent dysphoric about them specifically. cis people (and truscum) wont respect you if you dont :/

[forrestlurker]

Just watched a cis woman argue for banning trans men from birthing wards because, and I quote, "some women have been SAed"

To clarify, she did not mean had been SAed by trans men. She meant by cis men. So she wanted to exclude trans men because cis women have experienced violence by cis men. She believed trans men should be punished for cis mens actions.

[fatheriimaginedyoutaller]

Anyone else kind of uncomfortable with this post?

[trans-androgyne]

People have been mocking me for advocating for trans men with “boohoo won’t someone please think of the men” sentiments. Make fun all you want, I will never, ever stop caring about trans men. Go for an insecurity next time, not what I’m proudest of. Trans men, I love you forever and you deserve better. Go ahead and call me a TMRA, since in the literal sense I sure am one

[impunkster-syndrome]

I wish I could talk about social pressure and expectation to pass as cis and perisex as a tool of oppression but 99% of queer people on this site and even in other spaces are not ready for that yet.

[cyberatioum]

If trans men have male privilege and are part of the male class because they pass as men, doesn't that mean they're also members of cis manhood, have cis male privilege (and not just cis male passing privilege) because they pass as cis ?

[craycraybluejay]

i love how half the time people talk about anti-trans laws they only talk about how it will affect trans women and never trans men or nb people because we don't exist and aren't at all affected by dangerous legislation!!!

[a-polite-melody]

The fact that the same person who talks about how no one cares about what trans women go through can post a poll (to an audience already primed to say “no” because of how much time that blog has dedicated to saying that transmascs speaking about our issues is outright transmisogyny in and of itself for assuming our struggles can even exist at the same time as these Much Worse transfem experinces, actually) about whether or not transandrophobia is real without recognizing the irony is. Sure something.

[gayhenrycreel]

what the fuck is wrong with this community?

why is there a requirement of trans men being subs? combined with the demonization of surgery, this cuntboy fetish thing kinda hurts. i never see any appreciation for, like... any dicks on men. unless said man is skinny, but also muscular to the point that im concerned for his mental health.

there are two (2) types of gay men allowed in the queer community: hairy muscular masculine cis man, and objectified "trans man" who is always white, fem, has no body hair at all, and is treated as a woman in every way. also he has to have a misgendering kink. its a requirement.

this would be fine if there was ANYTHING ELSE ALLOWED.

even irl i don't know any masc queer people at all. i feel very alone. does the queer community hate masculinity? i dont want to go into a relationship if its expected that im fine with being a submissive woman. i dont want to have sex before phalloplasty.

i go into a queer space (any space, irl or online) and everyone is talking about makeup and offering me some and calling me "girl" and theres this idea that men are evil. theres nothing wrong with femininity but radical feminism is never okay. the last queer space i was in irl had this one person who made jokes about how men suck and EVERYONE AGREED WITH HER.

everytime they have an event people offer me makeup and I GET CALLED A GIRL AGAIN.

even worse, the fucking coordinator tried to convince me to preserve my fucking egg cells after i said i want my entire reproductive system removed and stomped on. then she called me "girl".

and i said i didnt like makeup but people just said "are you sure?" like i dont know what makes me suicidally dysphoric.

i cant go into a space for people like me without my gender expression being questioned.

its bizarre that a cishet doctor would listen to me more about my sexual autonomy than a fellow trans person who says i might change my mind about HAVING A WHOLE FUCKING PERSON GROWING INSIDE ME. i have panic attacks about that. i have nightmares. and then she said i should still consider having sex, and when i said i don't want to she told me ill "meet the right person one day". i have a medical condition that makes penetration EXTREMELY painful, and when i try other holes i cant fucking feel anything, and no i dont like being pressured into sex because, shockingly, im not interested in getting raped.

i wont even consider sex until i get every surgery i can get. i just want a relationship that never goes past cuddles. i wish people would consider that i want to be a cis man, especially after ive already said thats what i want.

the cis people in my life always respect my gender. a lot of trans people in my life call me "girl" and tell me shit like "youll get to a point mentally where you dont need surgery to be happy".

i actually had someone say that to me. i said that not having t and surgery makes me suicidal, and they just told me i dont need it. then they said surgery is not necessary, even though ive wanted it for longer than i knew it was an option.

(dont worry gaylord and twobruhsinahottub im not talking about you)

[swordbeliever]

tried to vent in a trans space about how, as a trans man who’s been on T for a long time (over 7 years now), i have noticed that the more i pass as a man, the less welcomed i am in queer spaces unless i go out of my way to feminize myself. and how that sucks! and it’s isolating!!! and it feels horrible to see ppl who used to like you and be close to you drift further and further the more masculine (& therefore more comfortable in urself) u become…

only to get ppl replying to me and saying “well if you dressed more fem then ppl wouldn’t be intimidated by you. you signed up for this”

i’m sorry but i didnt sign up for social isolation when i transitioned, i signed up for gender euphoria and comfort in myself and my life. and i had hoped that the ppl in my life would be able to see how much joy that brings me and continue to love me.

[sweaty-confetti]

idk y’all should treat fat men better. and i don’t mean mildly chubby guys i mean honest-to-god love-handles-and-double-chins fat guys. stop calling them shit like discord mods or gross weebs or nasty creeps or neckbeards or that they’re stinky or sweaty or beer bellied or whatever else. fatphobia isn’t cute, even repackaged in a neat little box of “ew men”

[sinistersuns]

hey look at this

Okay now we can get to the original post

😐

[borrowmyshovel]

"it's easy for trans men to pass, every trans man i know passes super easily"

[transmascissues]

the cis maternal urge to treat your trans son’s body like an extension of your own body, and to react to said trans son’s physical transition as if they might as well have just started hacking away at your own body with a rusty axe, really is something else.

my mom hasn’t seen my chest post-op at all because the idea of it is so awful to her that the one time we took my bandages off with her present, she ran across the hotel room to hide from it and started crying to my brother about it (yes, with actual tears). she drove an hour and a half with us at 5:30am to my post-op just to sit in the waiting room because she refused to come in and see me after the surgeon took the bandages off. my dad has been the only one helping me with recovery things like changing bandages and monitoring healing because she still won’t look at my chest.

and she says that’s because she loves me and cares about me. love is when you treat the body your child can finally live in comfortably like it’s your worst nightmare. apparently.

[cyberatioum]

Many people in the community really insist on conflating gender identity and gender class to present transmascs as privileged and part of the oppressor male class. This male positioning is then used to further distort, minimize our experiences and often even deny the misogyny we continue to face after transition. They say that trans men are men, not only in terms of gender identity, but also in terms of gender class, essentially they say that society perceives trans men as men, which is an insane thing to believe.

They advance the logic that identifying as a male places you in the male class, which gives you access to male privilege and power. Of course, the patriarchal class system doesn't work that way; patriarchy doesn't respect the gender identities of trans people. But unfortunately, many trans men fall for this and start to believe that they belong to the male class and have power over women, which isn't true at all and it's a harmful narrative.. That's why it's so important to distinguish between being a male in terms of gender identity and being a male in terms of gender class.

Trans men are men in terms of the former (gender identity) but not in terms of latter (gender class); in the latter case they are either women ("women who want to be men") or a third gender class.

[sevens-evan]

idk man i think that if you can read dozens and dozens of trans men talking about how their support systems abandoned them when they started getting too masculine on T or had top surgery or whatever, and queer spaces started treating them like threats or potential predators, and you find these stories going back to the 90s or even earlier, and you read all of that and come away thinking that there’s nothing wrong with how progressive communities treat men, you are just fundamentally beyond help dude. you don’t see us as people