#im not going to go “EWWWWW” If i see it in a fic

[taw-k]

Please tell me in not the only one that really doesn't like the nickname "pet" that Loki always uses 😭😭😭

[asscrackcreed]

part 2 after the author replied i wasnt sure if i should carry on but with their unapologetic attitude ofc i went through with it

STOP WITH THE KADAR AND MASTURBATING THING ITS FUCKING GROSS WHY DOES HIS BROTHER A N D MOTHER KNOW !!!!!!!’ ENOUGH

omg kadar is 16 and maliks 19 shut the fuck up EWWWWW

ok let me explain it properly this author fetishised kadars teenage hormones why do we keep coming back to kadar wanting to have sex esp if hes a minor its disgusting theyve made a point that u can explore gross things in fiction because yk its fiction and not irl and tbh idgaf because youre telling me you enjoy reading about a minors sexual life? youre telling me you enjoy reading about a brother telling his MINOR brother about HIS sex life? defend incest if u want im not here to change ur mind about incest but if u think that u can just write about minors sexually u are fucking disgusting

a lot of talk about god but none of it relates to the story or being gay so idk not interested

DES AND EZIO KISSED. WITH TONGUE. AND EZIO INSTIGATED IT?

chapter 27^ i cant do it anymore its 3am as im typing i’ll finish the rest when i wake up

kadars only personality trait is being horny tf

adha is very religiously strict and thinks altaïr is a godless pig uhm. ok… making adha rude is very uncalled for you couldve chose to use a random woman like…. a stranger but no it had to be canon altaïrs dead ex… and altaïr says ‘i dont know much about islam’ i dont understand why some fanfic authors insist on making altaïr completely atheist, i feel like altaïr wouldn’t be religious tbfh but hed still have islamic norms and values. when we can write characters in a way the original source material doesnt why cant we include cultural and religious aspects? why do ppl try so hard to remove the fundamental aspects of islamic culture. altaïr not knowing islam just drags the story more because if he did then hed understand adha and like idk hed connect with malik more and adhas anger would be justified but here she is being an ass and assuming the worst because…? she could’ve just called him an asshole idk why she dragged religion into this its reminding me of strict religious ppl who hate the new generation so far there hasn’t really been much about the good things of islam

adhas apologising now for assuming the worst. she paints smth for him? doesnt really make sense but alright

if altaïr can honor his mum with a tattoo (which is haram but anyways) he could surely honor his dad by celebrating eid or smth or just praying some time idk the paragraph im reading is about how his grandmas not religious and his dad was a practising muslim but never taught altaïr which ok he died when altaïr was 5 fine but idk the authors very intent on making sure altaïr isnt muslim but personally if he was muslim it’d be interesting because then hed struggle with his faith and himself i mean malik doesnt seem to struggle at all so idk ig everyones different

excuse me? so we can add black fetishisation to the list as well cuz wtf was that? it doesnt even add to the story its so random and unnecessary?

uhm altaïr and adha fell in love not a lot of depth to their relationship considering this mustve been over the course of days maybe even a few weeks idk just not a lot of time as it is to uh fall in love but shes engaged so theyve left it at that still not a bad plot point ig but it doesnt affect malik as of yet which undermines this plot point but lets see what happens

leo and sofias interactions are cute i like this leo malik and sofia friendship going on

im not gonna comment on any more incest its obvious this author just has a thing for it and theres so many fics that have incest and if i was to really fight that id do it for the other fics too also i wont comment on their writing as a whole anymore the main issue here is the cultural erasure and fetishisation

these do not affect the plot in any way shape or form, yes its an old 2014 fanfic but the author seems to not give a fuck that theyve written gross things. as well as poorly write islamic characters, it feels like a ‘youre either religious or your not’ and writing things like this is harmful! youre telling readers that muslims are either very harsh (like adha was) or very sweet (like maliks mum for being okay that maliks gay) but what about the catholic side of the family? theres no indication that they’re homophobia stems from religion. also ppl think its okay to just make altaïr unaware of his own heritage and faith? yes hes not muslim per say but hes syrian? his father died young but you can choose to write about the family wanting to help altaïr keep his customs alive. its white. its so white. it makes me more upset that the author will only focus on us disliking incest rather than accept that they’re wrong for cultural erasure. youve told hs that he’s syrian and white but just added that he misses his dad. and u cant defend sexualising kadar at all i wont hear anything about that because what u enjoy in fiction is also a reflection of what you enjoy irl. if you think incest is cool you will have a natural interest of it irl theres a reflection of your interests in your writing. if for example i wrote angst you would naturally expect that i like it or have a connection to it in some way, that i enjoy somehow. but i dont really like angst i could write for it but thats from my experience and thought process. someone who writes smut doesnt mean that they’re sexually active but theyve thought about it, they might’ve done some research to it. do u see what im tryna say? you are actively advancing on your interests when you right about them in fiction, you have a connection to it. if you hated smut someone would assume you hated it irl. the logic applies here too, if you dont like incest irl and it grosses you would simply not read incest in fiction because it grosses you out. if you dont like cultural erasure and sexualising minors irl then why tf would u add it to ur fic? why would u think that the boundary fiction would allow that to be okay? and the thing is micro-aggressions back in 2014 were bad and i know that but the author having had feedback and not even acknowledging it in this day and age is disgusting. ppl say they like sass verse, i have to say the plot of it is interesting but there were so many unnecessary aspects that did not contribute or feel nice to read at all. even if someone uses the excuse that they didnt know smth about islam, i as brown muslim you can not dismiss my feelings towards the way they wrote any muslim characters.

[tomdiddlyumptious]

Omg can you write a fic where tom x black!reader actress wins an oscar and then tom proposes?

ALSO HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAYYYYY I LOVE YOU SO MUCHHHHHH

STOPPPPPPP I LOVE YOU TOOOOO GOD YOURE GONNA MAKE ME CRY SO MUCHHH THANK YOUUU IT MEANS SO MUCH TO MEEEE

T.H| IDK WHAT TO CALL THIS

Summary: your a crybaby...oh my goddd! Lets say coronavirus isnt here..okie dokey

Warnings: boogerz (ewwwww) jk.

“And the nominees for best actress are” Harry styles smiled, taking out the paper and accidentally dropping it, a panicked face while he picked it up making everyone laugh a bit.

He cleared his throat again, fixing his tie before repeating himself “And the nominees for best actress are....Scarlet Johansson for black widow 2”

The camera showed her, and she gently waved with a wide smile on her face. “Margot robbie for suicide squad 2”

She bit her lip in eagerness at the camera, her eyebrows raising as she shifted in her seat.

“Viola davis for, how to get away with murder”

She put on a thoughtful smile, looking at her husband.

“And y/n y/l/n!”

Your mouth went agape and tom squeezed your hand, your brother, his wife, and your shared mother dancing in their seats embarrassing you, hiding and going slump in your seat making everyone laugh.

“Also i just wanted to let everyone know” he lifted his finger “y/n is my celebrity crush, always has been. Sorry tom”

Everyone started to giggle again “its fine!” He yelled back making everyone cackle while you laughed yourself.

The drums started, worry and excitement fillong your viens as tom held your hand tight, your brother putting his hands on your shoulders and saying “youre gonna get this. Youve worked so hard and we are so proud of you” and murmering praises as tom gave you kisses on your temple.

“And the winner is.....” harry said, pulling out the other card very, very, slowly.

Hahaha

You thought is was gonna be easy?

I know your drenched in your own sweat

Is it raining on your face yet?

METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS

METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS

METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS

METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS

METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS

METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS METAMORPHOSIS

Oop

Hahahahahaha

Megatron-

Love ya niki-

“The winner is... y/n”

Oh god.

You and tom stood, he pressed his lips hard against yours “you deserve it, so much” you bit your lip and everyone slightly patted your back, your brother a little to hard but tom told you to get your prize, darling.

And zendaya got up to walk you, viola with a smile on her face as she wrapped her arm around yours, walking you down. “I love you so much, god im so proud of you” she smiled, giving you a hug, her face in your neck and you both rocked side to side.

Harry was a little to excited to see you, taking your hand when you let zendaya go and helping you up the steps muttering a playful call me making you giggle, then he handed you your award “one second!” He said in the mic, taking a tiara and placing it on your head. “There ya go”

Again some giggles, you stood infront of the mic, looking around and taking it all in. “Thank you all, so so much. I-uh never wouldve thought id get this today, to be able to hold this” you raised it a bit. “But i want to thank some people, my mom”

Of course she was crying.

“My brother”

He did a dance, a weird one.

“My acting coach, keanu reeves, and many of you in here, thank you for being who you are to make me who i wanted to be, to be who i am, thank you”

Abd like that it was over, everyone clapping and shouting your welcomes before tom stood, flattening his tuxedo before doing a light jog, now onto full on running “one-one second!” He shouted into the mic when he got there, harsh breathes leaving his lips.

“I have something to say, y/n youve made me so happy in these years that ive been with you, weve made it so far and i cant see myself without you...like at all”

Everyone shared a couple laughs.

“I know weve shared a couple moments, embarrassing ones. Like when i ripped my pants and bird poop landed in my hair so we had to run into the public restroom to rinse it out, then you burned me”

“It was an accident, i couldnt tell which one was hot and cold” you glared at him, everyone laughing again.

“But thats besides the point, what i wanna say is-“ he put the mic down, taking both of your hands and pulling you from infront of the stance, letting everyone see you both as he slowly got on his knees.

Harry grabbed the mic again, squating next to tom and putting the mic to his lips “you forgot mate” he muttered “will you marry me?” Tears fell down your face as you nodded your head, like the idiot he is he forgot to take out the ring but he did, a big shiny one.

Diamond specks everywhere, it was beautiful. Tears strolled down your cheeks as he slided the ring on, then standing up and lifting you from the ground, a salty kiss shared.

Harry stood and walked back to his spot, joining everyone clapping their hands after tom took the mic, still holding you he shouted “IM GETTING MARRIED!”

The crowd roared with claps, everyone standing and men shouting “WOO”, pumping their fists in the air. You both are so happy!!

[ccsthemovie2]

(I think it's a word over 500, but:)

"Speaking of Tsukishiro, how's he doing?", Eriol asks. Frying pan to fire to volcano.

"He's good," Touya says quickly, before Sakura can say anything. Yukito is not even in the ballpark of "good". Yesterday he called Touya and begged him to bike over and said it was important and when Touya showed up he was asleep, and stayed fast asleep right through to the next morning. He keeps trying to make appointments with doctors, and then falling asleep before he can call, or, when Touya calls for him, before he can make it out the door. Privately, Touya isn't sure how much good a doctor can do for him, but anything has to be better than this, right?

"Really? I'm glad to hear it." Ugh, how much has Sakura told him. Not that she doesn't have a right to talk to her friends, but, come on, would it kill her to least keep it between her and Tomoyo and the funny looking cat.

He's good, that's an obvious lie. Ruby has said Yukito could barely stand upright at school. Every inch of Touya Kinomoto is packed full of magic. Sooner or later, Eriol figures, either Sakura will be powerful enough to sustain him, or Yue will have to get over himself and just eat already. Touya can't actually do anything with his magic, so it's not like Yue, even weak as he is, will have to face much of a struggle to take it. (Aside from competition with Ruby, of course. There's something to that, right, articles and studies about animals being healthier if they need a bit of careful planning to get their food? Yes, so this works out nicely.)

Or maybe- oh, that's probably it. Yue's on to him, isn't he? He's just being stubborn as usual, figuring sooner or later Clow will appear via Eriol and save him. He can imagine how surprised, overjoyed, grateful Yue would be, if Eriol showed up and saved his life. He can imagine Yue's head resting on his neck as clearly as if he had kept Yue well-fed with magic a thousand times in his lifetime. It would be nice, in the short run, but it wouldn't be right, no. Clow is dead, and Yue needs to learn to live with that. If he knows what's good for him, he will take responsibility for his own life, and if he doesn't...

Ahh, well, maybe it's Clow's old sentimentality, maybe Eriol is just warming up to Sakura's moon guardian all on his own, but he can't bring himself around to the idea of letting Yue just die. He'd save him, if it came down to it. But, he tells himself sternly, only as an absolute last resort. He's just worrying because he misses Yue and wants to get to know him better all at once in that past-and-future way- it's worth a visit, soon. Yes, a nice little visit, and Yue will never even have to know it happened. Just to check in.

(sorry the formatting got weird when i copypasted lol!)

hiiii thanks for the ask!!!

if we talk about this convo we need to back up and talk about how it got here. this should give you some idea of how badly this needs to be under a cut for length lol.

so it all starts with the bit about how someone falling and being caught is something that happens a lot in ccs. how with eriol, it's purposeful, and with fujitaka (and i misremembered it but since found out she fell *on* him and not *caught* by him, which lolol i hope he broke a bone, but also its fine the fic's already marked canon divergent, or maybe the story gets misremembered, whatever, in any case), it's an echo of clowriol's intentional artificial-trustbuild-dangersaves but without the magic or purpose to back it up (just like fujitaka himself!), but it's a situation he quickly makes favorable to him, because it may be a blank slate but it's made of the same material.

this whole convo was part of one of the very first chunks written, but everything was going to go in a very different direction at first. (there's a lot of Cut Content from this fic, some that i just didn't like, some that wasn't connectable with the rest of the fic after it took the shape it took but might pop up somewhere else one day idk). in this particular bit i cut the later half of the conversation because i really didn't like what i'd written, but then even though the direction of the story changed the conversation was still going so it had to bounce somewhere else, so it bounced to yukito. here we are answering your ask 2 paragraphs in!

yukito, iirc in the anime, did catch her from a fall, (in the manga, which made way more sense for why she had to change her clothes and rest so much, he saved her from drowning, again iirc because who can trust a memory) and at a point where eriol still has some investment in making yuekito/sakura (ewwwww) happen, he's going to try and draw on that symbolism to nudge her in that direction, right?

so all this said, SPEAKING of yuekito. how are they doing.

bad, obviously. touya's freaking out. i imagine that part of what's stopping yukito from seeing a doctor is yue, though- he knows it wont help, and i dont think yukito has, like, person insides that will stand up to medical tests, and yue would pick up on yukito like, not wanting to be outed to the doctor as a magic construct because he, like, doesnt actually have a real heart that pulses, just a repeating heartbeat sound. doesn't for real have blood etc to test, just records of blood type (for personality reasons).

and also touya's a very like keep-ur-problems-not-everybodys-business type so hes like imagining sakura venting her fears to this weirdo and getting pissed off. but that didnt actually happen, eriol knew all on his own lolol. touya you have to say something nice should happen to sakura to make up for wrongly suspecting her now

and this bit on eriol's end is all wrong information and inaccurate conclusions and i was really worried ppl would take it at face value but i hope nobody did. in ccs we get moments where eriol wants sakura to take power, or to learn that power can be taken- his final battle with her, for example, where the answer to his light and dark puzzle is to use kero and yue's power, except that's not something she would ever Want to do or would even Occur to her to try. the power is gifted to her by kero and yue (and syaoran!) because they love her.

same concept, here- the answer to the 'yue is dying' puzzle is to eat touya's power, and he can't imagine the real reason why he won't just do that, and when he thinks about it too long it goes right to his ego- yue looovvvvesss clow, and by extension me. he wants meeeeeee to save him. he wants to neck kissy MY magic soo sooooo bad. but yue isn't considering any of that at all. he's thinking about yukito and what touya means to yukito and why that would make yukito hesitate to reach out, and that no way in hell will he just ambush his other self's crush down a dark alley and take his magic, even to save both their lives. he's a lot more selfless than clow and eriol ever realize. maybe- this is just a half formed thought right now, i dont know if im like certain about it, but- maybe they feel his devotion to clow was a form of selfishness, that he Wanted Love as a thing he could hold and own, whereas pretty much everybody else who meets him goes like YOU SELFLESS MAN YOU CANT JUST DIE FOR PPL YOU CARE ABOUT YOU GOTTA TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF TOOOO

and there’s also that bit of teacherliness intrinsic to the three of them again: im doing this to teach him a lesson. im letting ruby do her thing without telling her what’s going on to help and encourage yue, etc.

anyway, that (in terms of fic weaving itself into canon) solidifies his decision to do uhmmmm a thing that creeps me out real bad in the anime (knocking yue out to have a moment with him, and oh, ding, there's another 'you fell but i caught you' moment!). eriol loves this manner of hanging out with people, you see it later in this fic, even:

It's important to say what's in your heart to the people you want to say it to, even if you have to make sure the other person never hears it. It's important for your own emotional freedom.

he loves to spend time with people exclusively on his terms, to the point where the other party never even knew he was there, because he knocked them out, or because he was just staring creepily at the outside of sakura's house while she did homework, etc etc etc.

tldr: it's all connected, aaaaaaaaa

[cheryllcher]

ladybug reactions (spoiler alert!!!)

a little late cuz i was busy but i finally watched ladybug!! again im on mobile so sorry about not putting the keep reading thingy!! btw im pretty harsh with alya but i dont hate her it was just my reaction so no alya hate i swear :))

- theme song: AHHHH NO IM NOT READYYYYYYYYY

- wait adrien making the charm bracelet???? wasnt that like back in s2?? wuts going onnnnnnn

-well i still dont know wuts up by yay marinette he allowed adrien to go to you bday party cuz of u i guess

-OH THIS IS A FLASH BACK IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW

-oh look gabe the hawky man is out if the house look at that

-OHNO LIELA WUT R U DOING WUT R U PLNNINGGGGG >:(

-idk wut she stole but it's bad ohohohoh OHNO HOW DARE U U R GONN ACCUSE HER IF THEFT DKSJDJSJ

-lieslieslies liela please stop talking

-"u gOtTa StoP oBsSesSiNg OvEr hEr mArInetTe" yes please listen to yourself when u are with lila thanks

-wow even chloe is shook okayokay im liking this episode alredy even tho i hate liela's guts

-*gasp* omg she got full marks im so proud of u girllllll after all the akumas from mr. buttfly man u deserve it fvldkwkw

-OH YES FINALLY- ew liela- SOMEONE'S DEFENDING HER

-liela you're hardly making it unbearable?? like no offence u are just an inconvinience that just wont stop

-oh great all of the "liela accused marinette of pushing down the stairs" fics are coming truu

-iM SORRY MR DAMOCLES LIKE UM U SHOULD REALLY INVESTIGATE IT FIRST?? DONT JUST TAKE SOMEONE'S WORDS AT FIRST VALUE??(i mean in my opinion)

-if liela is having this much trouble shouldnt her mum be called?? since this is a case of "severe bullying"

-YAS THE PARENTS BELIEVE HER this episode is going great

-um since when was ms bustier with them??????? but go off i guess

-alix is mad?? well u better sorry to the person who will give u your miraculous i mean come on u should know marinette isnt a theif?? u should question it??

-OH YES ADRIENS GONNA DEFE- OH COME ON MR DAMOCLES NOW THAT'S JUST RUDE

-hawky im disappointed in u like i have no words to describe it i cant believe u would encourage this liar to cause teen drama

-again?? okay normally i would say give nathalie a raise but now yea okay u 2 deserve each other sheesh OH catalyst is returning dksjfjsjjd um where's the butterfly mask thingy??

-oh nooooooooo fight it mari!! don't let it get u!!!!!! ohhhhh loook chloe's protecting sabrina- wait does liela know about gabriel being hawkmoth??

-princess justice-- altho yes marinette deserves to be princess but i only accept if she's chat's princess

-NO DONT DO IT wow buttfly man so now u careeee. wait so if the person hasnt become an akuma the butteflies go away?? woah.

-um alya shouldnt u find it weird that all these lies involve liela?? like liking same guy aside--

-"yOu'Re mY bEst FrIeNd mArIneTtE i tOtaLlY bEliEvE u" and u wont believe her when she told u about liela go tell her "cHeCk yOuR SouRcEs" yea and then liela's story become tru great job ms reporter

-im sorry ma'am , sir but your daughter needs to run away to be ladybug sometimes???

-liela's mum???? MA'AM YOUR DAUGHTER HAS BEEN HELPING THAT MAN CAUSE HAVOC--

-oh there's some back story about emilie?? im intrigued

-wow liela good u see u actually do lie well for once but i still hate u anyway--

-oh nathalie wut a rebel wait hold up- theo?? dude just how many jobs do u have??

-and we return to the oh so beloved sewer!!

-duusu has such mood swings but I LOVE HER SO MUCH

-soooooo still havent come up with a name for u yet do u just break and buy new glasses everyday orrrr

-lolllll she's like "ahhhhhh my masterpiece is gonna be perfecto!!"

-omagod NO

-oh adrien gonna defend her-- oh nevermind mayura's there NATHALIE THIS ISNT REALLY A GOOD TIME-

-did she just- do that evil dramatic laugh for the cameras?? becuz honestly sameeee

-plagg i love u dont ever change

-CHAT NO IT'S A TRAPPPPP

-return of the marinette vision!!

-wow this sentimonster is good at actingggg also marinette please be there soon my heart cant take it

-omygosh ADRIEN PLEASE DONT BE STUPID AHHHHHHH NO

-*moment of realisation* oh shoot she likes someone else!! "uhhhhh it's- it's over"

-ADRIEN DONT KISS HER U IDIOT- omg yas thank u ladybug for saving this idiot

-"I CANT BELIEVE U FELL FOR THAT!!" pffft idk why this is funny HAHAHAHAHA

-oh mayura wait where was the telepathy mask the whole time anyway- yes ladybug is smarter than that

-marinette u take that back--- yes chat but u should know the love of your life but that tiny smile and giggle thoooooooo

-oh okay it's not the giant sword again

-lol she got a fork

-pffffft was that just-- a giant gum shooter i cant i cant even *laughs for like 5 mins*

-awwww nooroo caressss im sorry u had to go through this babyyyyy

-well oof that sound thank gosh im not wearing earphones

-awww yea 2 ladybugs dkskdkdkd "buggettes and kitty cats" I STAN

-noooo sentiladybug :( oh i guess adrien wasnt allergic at the moment :/

-wow the wordplay hawky definitely like father like son

-grandpa-- oh adrien poor child if only u knew

-ohhhhhh mothface u will regret it if u knew who chat was

-nathalie just gave up loll i relate

-aww the tail moves so cute

-yea rip buggette 2019-2019 :(((

-she's just my assistant-- alright go on your business i've got more interesting things to see

-hey we finally here the photographer's name- ewwwww liela wat is she doing hereeeee

-ohohoh adrien's angry liela u better watch out

-YAS FINALLY HE'S PROTECTING HIS PRINCESS GIRLFRIEND FRIEND

-"becuz we're friends aren't we??" wow u really just pulled that card

-rare disease- sir u should call for a doctor or at least a doctor's note yes?? like this is very um *cough* concerning *cough cough* no matter how.... moving

-hey marinette's tryna be the bigger person by being nice and mend bridges now you're just being rude

-EWEWEWWWWWW CURSED PHOTOS CURSED PHOTOS BLEH CALLING ALL EDITORS TO FIX THIS MESS!!!!

-yes marinette's face is a mood

overall this episode is actually realllllllllly gooooood they did really well with this one and yea now i can come up with scenarios to u know, put liela in her place :))) (there might be art for it if there is im gonna look out for them)

[sadrien]

what’s the stitch? | pt.1

on ao3

from the high school senior that brought you wanna chat? comes another chat fic that no one asked for

just so we're all on the same page, alya has the fox miraculous, nino the turtle, and chloe the bee. i latched onto this team of miraculous holders a while back and now i'm just throwing up random stuff. initially i wasn't going to write more than a small snip of this but @breeeliss​ is a horrible enabler (<3)

i'm still working on the dynamics for them, especially since they're still getting to know each other, so sorry if it's rough

anyway let's do this

18:23

Cat: What does this do? Oh COOL

Bee: what in fresh hell is this

Turtle: yo wassup this is rad wait lemme see…

Fox: HELLA

Ladybug: Chat what the hell did you do

Cat: Hey don’t blame me for being bored

There are fun settings on these things and I wanted to explore them

Fox: this is rad as hECK

Bee: i hate you all

Fox: this is going to be lit i cant believe i can text the crew through a weapon the magic whatevers that created these things knew what was up

Turtle has changed their name to michael angelo

michael angelo: hell yeah

Cat: Whoa what we can do that!!

Bee: this is going to be the most obnoxious chat ever i can feel it let me leave

Cat has changed their name to :3

Bee: holy shit let me out wait why the hell don’t these things have emojis i am personally offended

:3: Ah yes let me just call up the ancient gods and ask them to install emojis on our weapons

Bee: listen here you piece of shit

Fox has changed their name to foxy lady

Bee: can i give back my miraculous i don’t want it anymore

foxy lady: this is the best thing to ever happen

michael angelo: aYO

:3: I love it It’s like a less awful skype

Ladybug: Can we maybe try to keep this for talking about where akumas are?

:3: Hmmm

foxy lady: i mean we COULD

Bee has changed their name to beeutiful

beeutiful: ;*

michael angelo: yeah no way thats happening ladybug

:3: Its bonding!!!

Ladybug: Now I want to leave

:3: Awww join in on the fun my lady! Please??? Team bonding

foxy lady: @chat do u know how 3 get youtube on these things ive got videos to send

beeutiful: ummm what sort of videos?

foxy lady: ;)

michael angelo: if you send a meme ILL give up my miraculous

foxy lady: good we dont need u

Ladybug: Did you say team bonding??

:3: Yes that’s exactly what this is Duh

 6:13

michael angelo: well shit i really hope your kwami alert you of messages or something cause im actually going to use this the way its supposed to be used akuma at eiffel tower

 6:17

beeutiful: disgusting i’ll be there in a minute

:3: You’ll BEE there?

beeutiful: im going to punt you off the tower

foxy lady: i ws going to tell u 2 shut up unfortunate wheres the bug @

michael angelo: um??? backup??????? please????

foxy lady: OH right omw

 6:19

Ladybug: Ill be there in a sec

 6:48

foxy lady: i cant believe u all bolted like that i was gonna ask if we could do breakfast

Ladybug: I’m about to destransform, sorry! Ill talk to you all later but really since my kwami can only tell me that I have a message but not whats in it please try not to talk here too much I wont be able to tell whats important

:3: I can’t beelieve this

beeutiful: im literally going to rip your head off

foxy lady: everything is important anyway food i guess ill find some on my own then on my own pretending hes beside me :’(

beeutiful: @ladybug if you figure out how to mute this please let me know because oh my god

michael angelo: bro im just gonna snag a bag of chips before class

:3: Healthy

michael angelo: what was the last thing you ate cat boy?

:3: You’re going to judge me

beeutiful: im always judging you

foxy lady: oooooo

michael angelo: what are you a health nut or osmething cn?

:3: Not by choice

foxy lady: unfortunate

michael angelo: alright next patrol were getting super cheap pizza

foxy lady: and fries and milkshakes and possibly also hamburgers superheroing makes me hungry

beeutiful: ewwwww

foxy lady: dont like junk food???

beeutiful: no!!! its greasy and disgusting and sooo bad for your skin like who wants to deal with THAT

:3: Ok true I don’t have time to deal with acne

foxy lady: u both have unfairly perfect skin

michael angelo: ^^ true tho how do you manage that??

beeutiful: good genes and a fantastic skin care routine sure i’m naturally gorgeous but it takes a little work to reach true perfection

:3: So many different types of scrubs and creams So many that I could drown in them And also makeup Usually concealer and foundation every day

beeutiful: true my contour btw? art

foxy lady: thats cool but u havent seen my cat eye

:3: ;)

michael angelo: yeahhh makeup isnt my jam i suck at it 0/10 not attempting again

beeutiful: what!!!! makeup is EVERYONES jam i mean if you don’t like it whatever but with practice and patience you too can look as good as moi if you think you don’t look good with makeup on it’s just cause you’re not doing it right trust me

foxy lady: yeah bro if we didnt have these masks id totally do u up during patrol one night

:3: Add that to the list of things to do if we ever reveal our identities Makeovers

michael angelo: theres a list???

beeutiful: wait i thought we could never ever tell each other ever boss’ rules

:3: A cat boy can dream

foxy lady: do we think ladybug likes makeup

beeutiful: oh my god the most important question shit i’m about to detransform anyway check out my contour next time we’re out because it’s flawless

michael angelo: im out too ive been pushing it later dudes

foxy lady: and then there were two

:3: Benefits of using catacylsm at the end I guess

foxy lady: :P this miiiiight b difficult if we can only use it when transform eh w/e ill take what i can get

:3: Same honestly

 17:34

foxy lady: im bored and my actual friends are busy

 17:39

michael angelo: so we arent your friends then

beeutiful: i am not your friend

foxy lady: wow rude

michael angelo: what saving paris together doesnt make us friends?

beeutiful: as if!! being my friend is a privilege it’s like getting access to an exclusive club

foxy lady: soooooooooooo u dont have many friends then

beeutiful: fuck you i have plenty of friends

:3: Children please Ladybug is literally going to have my head

michael angelo: broski you were talking wiht us earlier

:3: Yeah but I didn’t have her glare burning holes into my soul the entire time

foxy lady: UR!!!!!!!!WITH LADYBUG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:3: Yeah of course I’m with Ladybug?

beeutiful: and why exactly were we not invited??

:3: Parents need alone time sometimes

michael angelo: oh my god

foxy lady: #rude #betrayal #urnotmyrealdad #ettuchatnoir #whentheydontloveuback

beeutiful: stop before i hunt you down and stop you myself

foxy lady: #fucku

michael angelo: question is lb seriously that annoyed

:3: She’s not thrilled Hmmm how to Got it

:3 has sent a photo [selfie of Chat Noir smiling and holding up a peace sign with an unamused Ladybug in the background]

michael angelo: well thats a look i never want to face head on

foxy lady: rip u id face it down if it meant i got to spend more time w ladybug

beeutiful: fangirl much

foxy lady: oh shut up i kno ur the same

beeutiful: oh do you????

foxy lady: ummm yeaH i remember our first day do u

beeutiful: shit

michael angelo: i like to block most of that day from my memories

beeutiful: no one asked you shellhead

:3: Children please Wait really?

michael angelo: ehhh i mean it was really cool and life changing and all that shit but also i embarrassed myself in front of two of the most awesome people ever so yeah

beeutiful: kiss up

michael angelo: listen my dude i was not ready to be a superhero before this the most exercise i got was climbing the stairs to my apartment and the occasional run from akumas

Ladybug: To be fair Chat and I werent ready either

foxy lady: !!!!!!!!!! she speaks!!! ok but ive been prepping to b a superhero since i was like 4

beeutiful: same actually

:3: I watched way too much Sailor Moon not to be ready But I still wasn’t ready Lots of face planting

Ladybug: It gets easier and you have chat and I for help You dont have to figure this all out on your owns

:3: True Doing it by ourselves was unfurrtunate

beeutiful: moment ruined

foxy lady: im tearing up thank u i feel loved

michael angelo: ok so who wants to teach me tricks to get out of class and work for akuma attacks because bru h

:3: Uhhhh

Ladybug: Um

:3: You’re on your own good luck

beeutiful: wow you’re a great mentor we’re so lucky to have you

Ladybug: Be creative in your lies and dont repeat the same ones too often??? But also dont get too extravagant because then its a mess and gets out of hand Now stop messaging here its annoying!!!!!!!!!!!

 19:03

:3: Does anyone have cheese?

Ladybug: Chat if this isnt relevant I will end you

:3: I swear it is!

beeutiful: umm yes why??

:3: I need some We’re out and I didn’t realize Could you meet me somewhere with it?

beeutiful: i guess if it’s that important? what kind

:3: It is that important Anything If you have camembert that But anything

michael angelo: how is this relevant

:3: Grumpy hungry kwami

beeutiful: i have camembert how do you not have food for your kwami?

:3: It’s been a long week sue me Tower in ten?

beeutiful: i can’t believe i’m doing this but yes you owe me whiskers

 19:11

foxy lady: thisll be the weirdest brush contact paris has ever seen