#im so dumb. why did i not connect these dots

[just-a-simple-dyke]

Wait a second.....hong jiyoon.....kim dahyeon.....im sowon.....choi suho.....yang jieun......i sense a pattern emerging

[elasticitymudflap]

you think your boy Simon is gonna come back for season 2 or is he all arced out?

LISTEN *GRIPS U* SORRY IM ALL CAPS IM JUST BEING VERY NORMAL RN

SEASON 1 WAS BASICALLY ABOUT GETTING HIM TO THE POINT WHERE HE WAS SIMPLY NO LONGER LOOKING FOR AN EXCUSE TO THROW HIS LIFE AWAY, AND RECOGNIZING/NOT ROMANTICIZING THE CONCEPT OF SACRIFICE IN HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH BETTY BECAUSE OF HOW DISPROPORTIONALLY SHE SACRIFICED HERSELF FOR HIM IN WAYS HE WASN'T COGNIZANT OF.

IMHO:

SEASON 1 BARELY TOUCHED UPON ADDRESSING OR WORKING THROUGH HIS ICE KING TRAUMA. THIS IS MY FIRST MAIN THING I NEED THEM TO TOUCH UPON.

IT CONCERNS ME THAT SIMON DIDN'T EVEN COMPLETELY CONNECT THE DOTS IN THAT ALL THE CRAP WORLDS THEY WENT TO WERE HINGING ON WHO HE IS AND THE IMPACT HIS LOVE AND SACRIFICE (OR THE LACK THEREOF) HAD ON THE WORLD (DID SORT OF FOR A MOMENT IN THE STAR BUT NOT NEARLY ENOUGH IMO)

HE'S OBVIOUSLY STILL PROCESSING HIS YEARS TAKING CARE OF MARCY IN THE APOCALYPSE???? THERE WAS NO FOLLOW-UP WITH HER PHONECALL EVEN IN THE FINAL MONTAGE???? WHAT HAPPENED IN OOO WHEN HE DISAPPEARED??? THESE TWO NEED TO FUCKING TALK FOR REAL

WHAT DOES SIMON'S LIFE LOOK LIKE WHEN HE'S NO LONGER AN EXHIBIT?? HOW THE HELL DID HE BECOME/CONSENT TO BECOMING AN EXHIBIT IN THE FIRST PLACE I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK?? HOW DID HIS LIFE CHANGE SO DRASTICALLY (OR DID IT NOT) FROM OBSIDIAN??

THE MORAL OF "MAYBE WE SHOULD HAVE GONE ON THAT TRIP TO AUSTRALIA INSTEAD / WHO KNOWS WHAT LIFE WOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE" IS SO BAD FOR HIM TO END CONCLUSIVELY ON AFTER EVERYTHING WE'VE SEEN BECAUSE THE WORLD STILL FUCKING ENDED??? MAYBE HE FOUND THE CROWN, MAYBE HE DIDN'T, BUT EITHER WAY FROM WHAT WE SAW IN THE ALT WORLDS IT WAS ALL GOING TO END IN TRAGEDY AND MAYBE THIS IS THE ONLY WORLD WHERE WE GET A BITTERSWEET END INSTEAD OF A HELL WORLD THANKS TO THEIR DESICIONS??? IDK!!!!!! I'D LIKE TO EXPLORE THAT CONCEPT I THINK

THE UNIVERSE IS OUT OF HIS NOODLE, BUT DOES SIMON'S HEAD-PORTAL STILL WORK?? CAN HE CONNECT TO FIONNA WORLD IF HE'S IN HIGHLY CHARGED MAGICAL ENVIRONMENTS??? ACTUALLY, WHAT THE HELL ARE THE LONG TERM EFFECTS OF A HUMAN HAVING A UNIVERSE IN HIS DANG HEAD

HE'S CONNECTING WITH ASTRID NOW AND SEEMS TO BE ON MUCH BETTER TERMS, IS SHE GOING TO INSPIRE HIM TO START WRITING FIONNA AND CAKE STORIES AGAIN TO COPE IN A HEALTHY WAY WITH HIS PAST THIS TIME??

SIMON'S RELATIONSHIP WITH ICE THING???

SIMON'S HUMAN PAST IN GENERAL: WHY IS THIS DUDE THE WAY HE IS??? WHY DID HE BELIEVE THE THINGS HE DID, STUDY THEM, MAKE THEM THE THINGS HE HINGED HIS LIFE AND CAREER ON???

ON THAT NOTE: FLASHBACKS. MOTHER FUCKING FLASHBACKS. MORE OF HIS ADVENTURES WITH BETTY. WE ACTUALLY SEE SO LITTLE OF WHAT THEY WERE LIKE TOGETHER WHEN ACTUALLY HAPPY, HUMAN, AND IN A RELATIONSHIP TOGETHER, IN THEIR ELEMENT, AND NOT STRICKEN WITH LIFE-OR-DEATH DESICION MAKING EXCEPT FOR HIS DUMB ASS GETTING BRAINED BY A CHERRY JAR

HIS YEARNING TO FIND BETTY AND APOLOGIZE TO HER WAS "TECHNICALLY" HANDLED IN THE SHOW, BUT YOU CAN NOT TELL ME THIS DUDE DOESN'T HAVE LASTING ISSUES AND TRAUMA AROUND THAT. ABOUT THE FIRST TIME HE PUT ON THE CROWN AND BETTY DISAPPEARING FOREVER. ABOUT THE GUILT AND FEAR ABOUT HER BEING DEAD DURING THE WAR. ABOUT LIVING NINE FUCKING HUMAN LIFETIMES IN A HAZE WHERE ALL HE KNEW WAS HE HURT THE PERSON HE LOVED MOST AND HE JUST NEEDED TO FIND HER. IT BECAME AN INTEGRAL PART OF ICE KING'S CHARACTER, HIS MOST DEFINING TRAIT STRIPPED TO THE STUDS. HE HELD ONTO THAT LAST PIECE OF SIMON PETRIKOV SOME HOW UNTIL SO MUCH TIME HAD PASSED HIS ONLY HOPE TO EVER FIND HER AGAIN WAS TO USE TIME TRAVEL. I'D LIKE SOME MORE OF THAT, IF YOU PLEASE.

HOW IS HE ACTUALLY COPING POST-SEASON 1? WHAT ARE HIS THOUGHTS ON ALL THE WORLDS THEY VISITED, THE THINGS THAT HAPPENED TO HIM, THE IMPLICATIONS, HIS INTERPRETATIONS? HE MAY BE IN THERAPY BUT HE'S STILL DRINKING.

ANYWAY

[precious-little-scoundrel]

Yeah I really don’t think she opens up at all or that anyone is more privy to info than anyone else, it’s really just like u said, dot connecting. Except I guess Ida might have the best ability to do so since she understands Lu’s trauma the best

Tbh THIS is why I personally was surprised by the fluent english but dumb as a pig when the word no is said line, and buck and bucky finding out from that (IK U WERE JUST SPITBALLING HAHA). Not because i thought it meant full assault and I actually did think no referred to every part of their relationship and not just sex. But the reason I was surprised is because I don’t anyone knows anything to that extent. It’s all just guess work on their behalf (although educated). If anything, I think Ida might connect the dots and worry that this could be something that’s affecting her because she so deeply knows and understands everything Lu went through. If she expresses worry about that to John and Gale, I could see that and Im sure they could understand how their worries that he disrespects Lu in general could turn into something like that in terms of sex and again, i’m sure Ida worries but it’s not like Lu has outright told anyone that spencer doesn’t respect her.

yes 🥲

[bonesandthebees]

LETS GOO AM SO EXCITE EHEHEHEH ROSE TIME ROSE TIME ROSE TIME

And more specifically... Tommyinnit... Feel like this is gonna be an enemies to brothers situation eheheh

I used to read fics all the way first and then reread and write down my thoughts as I reread and I honestly think that's what I'm gonna start doing with rose bc I'm so enthralled that I keep forgetting to write down my thoughts LMFAOOO duuuddee I'm loving this sm already omg

Literally the only thing that broke my focus was me coming here to be like OMG sandduo moment 👆👆💥💥✨✨

I'm gigglinggg

OMG ITS TOMMYINNIT

Are they already matching hairstyles? Omg brothers moment

May I ask where the name Valbroek comes from:0 I'm fucking loving all these medieval takes on their names rahhhsss

Omg he's a CHILD

Me: I think I'm gonna read this all without commenting and then reread and comment after

Also me, immediately after: OMG TOMMYINNIT

Help I can't I'm obsessed over this omfg

Is that puffy my belvoed??$?$

Ooohhhhdhdjfkfksjd the cultural differences omgogmgogmgkshdksjdkff I'm so fucking excited for this fic shskdjfjfksk

Omg. Omg is one of them gonna be tubbo. Omg

YOOO JACK POG

Sidenote: I love how u manage to keep everyone so fucking in character and yet?? So different?? Seeing jack here is fucking whiplash after glass is all ima say frrrrr it makes me so excited tho I'm so curious to see what all of the dynamics are going to be and mannn it just keeps everything so fresh ur so cool bee

TOBYYYYY TUBBOOOOOOOO

CLINGYDUO !! CLINGYDUO !! CLINGYDUO !!

I'm staring so hard at them why r they sus shfkfkf

I love this juxtaposition of having everyone from Sam's court be super posh and proper and "studied every single millisecond, every moment of every hour of every day on how to act in court and all of the fancy politics' and super prepared and then u have. Tommy and Tubbo and Jack just completely flailing around omfg 😭😭😭 dude I feel like quackity and Niki are just like "this??? This is our competition??????" And LORDDD I am so ready to see the character development it's gonna be fucking amazing

DID THEY NOT PLAN AHEAD FOR THIS??? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

IM LAUGHING SO HARDJDKSKFKDKSDKF IM STILL REELING AFTER GLASS AND LIKE FEELING SUPER TENSE AND STUFF I WAS PREPARED FOR LJKE ANGST AND NOW IM JUST GIGGLING I LOVE THIS SM THEYRE SO PRECIOUS OFJSJKDKFKF I THOUGHT TOMMY WAS GONNA BE LIKE ?? SUPER ENTITLED AND DICKISH I WAS NOT PREPARED OHKHGODJDKGKFLLDF

This might be my fav bee!tommy yet omfg this is adorable

I love how fuckign confused Wilbur is 😭😭😭

I'm attached to them I'm so attached to rose!clingyduo istg if anyone of them die I WILL kill everyone in the room and then myslef holyfuckushintgjsjdkffld

Also I love how amused Sam is this is so <33 (I'm clinging to this wholesomeness before everything goes to shit omg)

THIS IS SO WHOLESOME WTFFFSHFJFKFLFKDKDF

I'M SO SCARED. THIS IS TOO WHOLESOME. WHATS GOING TO HAPPEN.

I just feel like . Everyone's gonna be like "wtf is Sam thinking, seriously considering *that child* as a heir?" And I feel like Tommy's really gonna come into his own and surprise everyone by the end of this fic... And who knows maybe parallels between Sam and Phil and TOMMY AND WILBUR I've done it Bee I've connected the dots, I've connected them. Didn't Sam literally say he had no idea what he was doing and Phil helped him... Ooiuhghhhh man OOOHHHH MANNNDJFKFLGLDKS explodes

YEAAAA SANDUDODODO DANCING (they were mentioned in the same sentence) (I am mentally ill)

Oh shit?????? I am staring I AM STARING

OHHH SHITTT CRIMEBOYS TIME ! LETS GOOO

Sam still trying to keep Wilbur as the next future consil? 👀👀👀

Ohmygod Wilbur ur dumb

YEAH U TELL HIM PHIL (but also ow ow ow daddy issues ow ow ow)

Oohhh godddhdkajdfkskdf enemies to brothers shdksoshdkdksjff

Omg he's being gentle omggjdkskf angelduo moment ! ☝️☝️

Uh oh

Uh oh

Oh godhfkdksjdd

THIS IS SO AWKWARDJFKDLDGG

He knows plants 🫶🫶🫶 I am so endeared by this boy omfg

Uh ohhh

OOP

Ily tommy slay king slayyy

Omg 😭😭😭 HES A BABYYYY BEE A BABYYY AND UR MCD'ING THIS FIC??? UR PUTTING THIS SWEET PRECIOUS PRECIOUS BOY INTO THIS MINEFIELD OF TRAUMA?? DEAR LORD I AM SO SCARED

also Wilbur bro. Now do u understand why ur dad wanted u to talk to him I don't get why ur so against this THE WHOLE POINT IS TO GET INFO SO U CAN BE ON TOP AND HAVE ADVANTAGES AND STUFF BROOOFJFJDK

Even I know that and I'm a dumbass /j

I adore tommy shfjfkdkdd I need crimeboys to be brothers NEOWWWW

Me this entire ask: omgogmgogm this child is ADORABLE I love him

Wilbur: he is so fucking rude and insufferable I hate him I hate my life UGH

OOIUHHHJMYGODHSKFJFJF I LOVE SANDDUO SO MUCHDJDOSODOFJDKDJFJF

OOHHHMYGODUDJLSDJFKF THE SANDDUO IS SO GOGUSODIDKSJFKFN THIS IS SO FUCKED UP BEE SHFKBJSBDKGJDJFFKSKDKF I LOVE THEM SM BUT I AM SCREAMING SHDNGLDJSKFJDDKFJFKSKFJDKDJFKFKDNFKGJDNDNFNFNFKGKGK AAAAAAA DJGKFJSNFKDNFKVKFK

The conflict... He has sm conflict... Aaaaaaaa wikburufdjskshdkskdnfn lord he's gonna go through so many crisises (?) (Crises?) in this fic oml I'm staring at Niki and quackity talking to each other and Wilbur feeling left out sooo hard omggg

IM SO EXCITED HOLYFCUINGHSITJDJDKFGKG I NEED TO SLEEP BUT LORD I AM SO SOSOSOSODOFJDKGKOAJDKGKGK IM INSANE IM INSANE ACTUALLY YHIS IS MY FAV THING EVER IM SOO?? EVERYTIME I THIBK IVE REACHED MY MAX OF LOVING THIS FIC I MAMAGE TO LOVE IT EVEN MORE BRO I AM SO FUCKING HYPED RAHSHSJFKGGL

God Sam and Phil are totally gonna be reminded of young Sam by tommy I can sense it... This is so shfkfksjfkdk

Anyways !! Ty for the epic chapter bee I am Reeling this is so fucking hype omgohmhofmdg

"omg sandduo moment" just describes you so well icy lmao

well, when I was trying to come up with the name of tommy's city I knew it was by the river and it's a port city so I wanted it to be related to water in a sense, but I still wanted it to sound more medievalish. Val is a shortened form of Vale/Valley, and broek is just me doing a weird spelling of brook. so it technically is just 'river valley'

it was so fun planning out the culture/fashion differences between the capital and the riverlands. like, there isn't a huge amount of difference, but nobility in the capital and along the coastline are usually kept up to date with the latest fashion trends and the like, and also the weather at the capital and along the coast is different than it is further inland in the riverlands. since they don't have the coastal regulation, it gets much warmer in the summer and much cooler in the winter there compared to the coastal cities. so that also affects the fashion trends.

lol thank you I try very hard to keep everyone in character while throwing them into these wildly different situations. I don't know why I have a thing for making jack a royal guard it just fits him, but as I'm sure you can already tell rose!jack is very different from stars!jack who are both extremely different from glass!jack while all still being forms of c!jack. it's a fun nuance for me to play with.

I definitely wanted to show how unprepared tommy is for this sort of court life. he's 13 and bloodline wise isn't anywhere close to the throne. this isn't something he was ever taught to expect as a possibility. once again just emphasizes how much of an out of left field choice this was for sam to make.

eli had the idea for the bit of clingyduo pulling that shit in court. it was so funny I couldn't not include it.

I'm sure you can guess but uh, while he might be a sweet kid now tommy is going to be very different by the end of this fic. :)

wilbur logically knows he needs to try and befriend tommy for his own benefit but he is nothing if not petty and dramatic

thank you icy I'm so glad you're enjoying so far!! these first few chapters feel so slow for me to write as the author because I know what comes next and how things ramp up, but I'm glad it's really enjoyable so far

[borathae]

chapter 15

Can’t you like it for me?” he says with big puppy eyes.

You look away.

“You’re being emotionally manipulative here.” shut up girl im loving u too much i cant

“You are playing with fire here, Bunny. Try not to burn yourself”, you grumble.

He chuckles and pecks your cheek.

“I like the burn”, he rasps against the shell of your ear, turning to the front afterwards.

SHUT UP IM CANT TAKE IT. try not to lose your shit challenge- mission failed successfully

He treated you so goddamn fucking well that sometimes you still felt the urge to punch him in the face and run away jk in the corner, i'll take that as a compliment

Lately the latter have become more and more. YAY

“Hey kiddo. How are you doing?” he says in a surprisingly deep voice for such a small frame. me with felix and taehyung

“for half a million bucks I expect to have the painter constantly working on it in a metal cage in the middle of my living room or something.” - ........ - a few bystanders had heard you and were now looking at you with weird eyes. SHUT UP THATS SOO ME except my voice would be low and nobody would hear but could be loud too cuz universe makes it louder at times when u dont want anyone to hear shit

although he was stressed and exhausted he never once smelled of alcohol. AHHHH IM SO PROUD OF HIM *gives a big ass hug and a smooch

WHY DOES NERO'S SHOULDERS LOOK FAMILIAR TO HER AND WHY DOES SHE LOOK FAMILIAR TO HIM AHHH STOP I HATE IT THIS CHAPTER IS A ROLLERCOASTER

again a fluffy moment after the tense thank you, her threatening to buy green and purple pillows PLZ that sounds like me trying to threaten my parents by telling them im gonna marry a cat crazy dude

“I’m not asking for it. I am very much anti punishment uwu i love this stupid noodle

He swallows heavily, “a-are we going to make out now?” he asks, grasping for your hips. he is such a cute and horny noodle pls and no u are about to cringe for the rest of your office time

FUCK GET YOURSELF A MAN WHO CAN FIGHT FOR YOU IMMEDIATELY

“don’t say that what the hell my cock twitched.”

“I am not going to apologize because I am way too turned on to care.”

He looks from side to side with the tip of his nose rosy.

“What’s with the sudden horniness oh my god?”

“It’s just that I never really saw you work before and it’s kinda doing things to me.” SAME HERE IM FEELING IM WATCHING SOME HOT CEO FROM KDRAMA BUT EVEN BETTER AAAAH

It makes his ass cheeks tense up and forces a quiet whimper from between his lips. SHUT UP SHUT UP HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO MOVE ON FROM THIS MOVE ON WITH MY DAILY LIFE????? VANESSA HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITAUTIONS ??

I REPEAT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITUATIONS??? JIWOO SOUNDS SIERIOUS OH SHIT NOW SHE KNOWS AAAH

WHY IS SHE CONNECTING THE DOTS SOMETIMES CHARACTERS SHOULD BE DUMB PLEASEEEE also why is there a group of people surrounding kook??? 👀

the whole thing was soo tense i sweated through my shirt now im a stinky kid -_- BUT WE LOVED IT the emotions was captured soo well and he was supportive yet very unsupportive if your brain's going haywire with an anxiety/panic attack

Twirling him threw him straight into subspace. *insert meme i hope i dont fall, her: twirls him kook : oh no mommy

the mom is sweet AND I CANT STAND THE DAD UGHHH

i prayed for her to not go to the mirror AND SHE DID NOO its really the worst thing to do during a panic attack :(

that was soo scary even i felt the uncontrollable demons while reading and thanks it ended on a good note and it was cute.

anyways i wish her a great day next morning(tho the story has ended) cuz them muscles be hurting like a bitch oof

Me reading through all your reactions:

hahahahha I love how you went on an emotional rollercoaster with this chapter jfdjsf also you quoting so many parts is my weakness hehehe thank you so much for doing that

BROORORORO THE TWIRLING PART WAS THE ONE OF THE FIRST TIMES I WENT "oh fuck i have a mommy kink" LIKE IDK IF YOU GUYS KNOW BUT AAOL WAS MY MOMMY KINK AWAKENING FADSFAHH

[forestryfae]

getting really fucking sick and tired of the ONE SINGLE laundrybasket we have here that we can use for clean clothes i fucking missing. again. cus some fucker took it and either just didnt put it back cus theyre fucking lazy, or they still havent put their clothes away and its in their room, or theyre using it to stash their shit in it for some fucking reason. because the only laundrybasket we have is the perfect place to dump your bag thats been on the floor along with other shit that doesnt belong in a basket thats supposed to be clean and also not in the fucking livingroom

like i wish it wasnt a big deal but when things arent in the places theyre supposed to be in cus someone feels like "everyone can use this thing that has a commonly known specific useage for its purpose" means "this is public property therefore i can take it and use it for whatever i want whenever i want, if its presented as a problem i simply will not connect the dots and i will continue to use this for the wrong purpose at teh detriment to other people who want to use it for its actual purpose" and it keeps fucking. happening.

last time it was missing i needed it AT THAT MOMENT and i wound up having to tell the last person whod used it to put it back, which they did do. TWO days later. ive seen it in the livingroom and other places filled w all kinds of stuf that isnt clothes. peoples bags that have been ON THE FLOOR are NOT supposed to go in the ONE clean laundrybasket we have?????? what the fuck?????????????

and like it shouldnt be something that infuriates me to the point of wanting to scream someones head off or rippin the basket out of their hands or even something that makes me cry or start to spiral after ive calmed down a little but its so fucking infuriating. its so unneccessary and selfish, we have one basket and its being hogged by like one or two people and its not in the place its meant to be in and we have to request it because they just. arent putting it back and they see no problem with this and i cant even complain or im a bitch who gets mad over nothing and also why am i complaining? it doesnt even matter its a stupid thing to be annoyed by and this is a me problem only and i need to not be such a bitch

like. i should be able to say "i dont think its okay that youre hogging everyones basket and not even using it for what its meant to be used for, its not supposed to have stuff in it that isnt clean clothes since people need it FOR their clean clothes" and not feel like im about to shut down and mocked and made fun of and told im always angry over nothing or feeling like i cant bring it up without having to prepare myself for backlash and being treated like shit by everyone cus none likes me anymore because i said i dont want a dumb fucking basket to be in the wrong place and used for the wrong thing.

and like the people here are actually really nice and they dont hate me, so its not like theyre doing it to be mean to me either. they just straight up didnt think someone else would use it which i still think is dumb cus its. a laundry basket. used for laundry. it needs to be in the right place. so people can use it when they need it instead of having to get annoyed cus someone just didnt consider that other people actually need it and now its missing and they have to look for it again and last time they needed it it wasnt there either. like theyre not being dicks on purpose theyre not awfuyl people who hate me but its still really fucking scary cus what if they DO start hating me or thinking im an angry unreasonable bitch and never wanting to talk to me again because of this.

like im supposed to be in therapy for this shit and we dont even have a psychologist here and i cant even talk to anyone about shit like this either without feeling im gonna get mocked or told im a shit person. like. im supposed to talk to my primary here when shits bad but shes not working every single day all the time. who else do i talk to then. noones told me thats something i can do and it doesnt work with every person who works here and if im already feeling like shit when i need to talk to someone and they say "yeah no talk to your primary" like??? shes not working for the next three days and you want me to stew in my room feeling like shit and missing out on work over one thing???

like. i really need someone to actually care about me for once. i need someone to say im actually allowed to be upset or have needs that are different from the norm and that needs consideration and actually. have whatever is wrong with me be the primary focus for once. yes it sucks that i missed work but i had shit going on in my head and didnt feel like i was worth enough to be alive around other people or i got treated like an incompetent three year old and i was pissed for days afterwards and could not physically calm down or stop crying but it sucks mroe for the people i work with cus i didnt call and tell them i couldnt go to work? do they not know how shameful it is to call and say "hey i cant go to work today or i might bite someones head off or cry the whole day or both"? literally never ever is anyone going to understand that and im gonna be a bitch and an asshole and im also a really shitty awful egoistical selfish asshole with no concept of emotional maturity who thinks the world revolves around them and is too stupid to ignore any feelings i have or put them aside long enough to prioritize cus im too stupid to understand that my emotions just dont matter. feelings and emotions are never important and im a bad person for struggling with all of this. like do people think im just. being lazy. im literally not going to work because i dont want to bite someones head off and i dont know how to fix anything if i do wind up doing that. im literally doing the only thing that works.

idk i just really wish there was a guarantee that people wouldnt hate me for. having feelings or having certain needs. and that if they did it meant it was just a compability issue or a them issue instead of it making me the worst person in the world

[cloudedmist]

It has taken me a long time to wonder why would this person say such nasty allegations. What he does not know is that I dislike large jawed torpedo headed humans, but that aside... I was wondering how he would even think of any story to tell the police. Well 1. I know he knew about me telling him about Javen Oon. Because his counselor talked about it, and I never hid anything from him. 2. I realize from his posts, that he is skilled and experienced with many boy friends and lovers. Pictures often show less than the actual "fun" of events isnt it... well it's captured in videos, him and another guy personally hugging, touching dicks, and what more... I start to connect the dots and understand more on how he would be able to construct stories that would convince the police to run in his trail of lies. Callistar Chen Zhi Bin... I believe the police will never be so stupid. the truth will find you out. Dumb disgusting evil minded person. And even though you do such things, I do not regret making sure you did not smoke, did not fight, did not do all sorts of illegal things when I was trying to make sure you would study and go to school on time. I did what was right, and Im proud I did not go down to your low level, evil, insensitive, dumb headed.

[voidbeomgyu]

7:06AM: ive been so inactive bc classes just started again, but ive come back to release my anxiety ab this man at the bus stop. im literally in the bus rn but at the stop i was waiting and then some man ive never talked to before pulls up and starts talking to me. ((for context my class starts at 7:15am and i take the 6am bus bc the next bus is at 7am and id be late by a few right but sometimes idc ab being late cos im tired so i take the 7am bus, like today))

so ive seen this fool like mayb two times before ,i cant remember but he never talked to me until today when he walked to the stop and asked me "arent you cold?" cos all i have on rn are my sweatpants and a tshirt over a white longsleeve cos my first class is a body conditioning class im gonna warm tf up right. but i was like "uh aha a little" and he laughed or whatever and then just kept talking like bro im literally trying to text my "more than friends" friend rn leave me alone. he asked if im going to school rn and BRUH MEN MAKE ME BLANK OUT LIKE MY MOUTH GOES ON AUTO PILOT SO MY DUMBASS SAID YES.

ive had some not good at all experiences with men and boys around my age before so idk, ig over time my axiety just got worse? anyway he was like "college? [state] state?" and i omg i was like "no just college ahah" and the nearest one is like the ONLY ONE SO HE CONNECTED THE DOTS TO WHICH SCHOOL I GO TO OBV. i even told him my name bc im DUMB. but like im wearing my bracelets rn right (i make and wear kandi ((pony bead bracelets))) and the one on my wrist has my name on it and so does the phone charm thing i made. so i like noticed him eyeing it and was like FUCK I CANT EVEN LIE ARRGRGRHHR COS LIKE I COULD SAY IT WAS A FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER NAME RIGHT BUT WHY WOULD I HAVE MY PHONE CHARM SAY SOMEONE ELSE'S NAME RIGHT GRRRARRGGRGSGR

after he would finish a thought id turn to look forward to the road again and look down at my phone to text my friend right so it would be silent for like 2 second and then BOOM HE STARTS TALKING AB HOW HE GOT HIS LISENCE SUSPENDED FOR THREE YEARS BC HE KEPT BREAKING THE LAW AND GETTING TICKETS IM LOSING MY MIND WHY WOULD I NEED TO KNOW THIS??!??? he was like yea thats why im taking the bus now and have to wake up so early and im sitting there like 😀👍

i had my mask on bc paranoia yardy kno (tmi i have the covid vaccine and two boosters and i still got sick but i didnt die so cool it did what it was supposed to ((tmi tmi my body is so weak when i was in 5th grade i almost died from an infection spreading up my arm to my heart from a PLAYGROUND WOODCHIP SPLINTER IN MY FINGER...))) so like i wear masks bc i dont wanna get sick by ANYTHING EVEN JUST A COLD OR SOMETHING IDC IDC im happy for that tho cos 1. man does not know what my face looks like and 2. face warm

OKAY ANYWAYS when he found out my name he paused for a second and asked who my dad was and i was like ...what so he said something like his ex's brother had a daughter named [MY NAME BRUH] and i was like 😀👍 aaahawggagwggs so he thought i was her or something. i was like oh okay haha and then turned back around like ive been doing to try and end the conversation right, but like we are waiting at the bus stop yk so theres gonna be cars that pass by and its gonna get loud especially rn everyone is going to work. but since it was loud ig i didnt hear him?? cos suddenly his voice is like way louder than before right so i turn and hes like A FOOT AWAY FROM MY FACE IM AARGRHEGR WHY. he said his name i forgot what it was i wasnt paying attention cos i was like 😦 but it think it was michael, so michael if u ever see this ur weird.

anyway then he said something like "you know what's cool?" and bruh i literally saw my life flash before my eyes. why? idk but that sounds so ????? like scary ???? but i was like "uh sure" and then he went on this tangent about being in the navy and that he got to travel the world like three? idk how many times but he was telling me wheres hes been like naming the countries right

i was just sitting there being my polite little self bc i was raised to no matter what respect when someone is speaking to you in a conversation even if u dont wanna be there. like for when someone older than you is speaking to you i mean and this guy was OOOOOLDER THAN ME faded brown hair covered in grey, brown grey fluffy stash, he looked like maybe early-mid fifties but could pass for being like 70 im being so fr. anyway yea im being polite even tho im like so uncomfortable bc thats just what i do idk😭 it was def obv how uncomfortable i was tho i was fidgeting SO much like shaking both my legs, picking at the skin around my fingers, and trying to end the conversation multiple times. but he just kept going😭

but after that whole idk how long tangent ab navy stuff he suddenly asked (after i turned around to stop talking to him ofc) how old i was like "how old are you if you dont mind me asking?" and so i was like scared but also kinda relieved cos i get comments a lot about how much younger AND how much older i look bc ig i just present myself more mature??? even tho my style and stuff isnt like super mature or anything ppl ive talked to like teachers/parents/classmates who are older than me, like mid twenties to late thirties tell me that they thought i was so much older when im actually like a baby. its only ppl my age that say i look younger right, so i was like oh maybe he thinks im like way older or something?? like im wearing a backpack and a little tote with stuff so it looks like im going to school, but he asked if im attending college or a four year uni meaning he thought i was a little older (or at least he just didnt mention a thought of me being in high school? mayb cos im taking the public bus and not a school bus idk). i said the truth bc I HAD HOPE IDK BRUH LIKE IKKKK I RLLY SHOULD NOT HAVE HAD ANY HOPES BC A MAN IS A MAN AND IF U GET WEIRD VIBES THEN THEY ARE PROB VERY MUCH CORRECT BUT IDK😭😭😭

anyway i told him like yea im 18 and when i tell you his face lit up like LIT UP. i was gonna be sick like why are you smiling so hard at me being so young like he was giddy ab it too like STOPPPP. he was like "woww getting your education earlyyy thats awesome" and tbh idk how to take comments like that bc idk hs at least in my state is like "go to college or university immediately after highschool" and during senior year we have stands up to help us apply for schools and stuff so i dont rly see me being 18 at college early or anything so i just sat there like "😀👍 thanks" IM USING THAT EMOJI COMBO A LOT BUT DAWG ISTG THAT WAS LITERALLY ME THE WHOLE DAMN TIME IM SO FR

i was thinking to myself like WHY IS THIS BUS TAKING SO DAMN LONG PLEASEEEE😭😭😭😭😭 but it arrived eventually and he got on first and sat allllll the way at the back. i always sit near the front bc its just easier ig idk but i was like so relieved bruh while i was sitting there listening to him i was thinking like oh my god P L E A S E do not sit next to me to keep our conversation going i want to sit in silence and be CALM. IM LITERALLY A BROKE COLLEGE DANCE MAJOR STUDENT IM SO PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY TIRED AND I CANT EVEN DRIVE SO IM TAKING THE PUBLIC BUS AT 6AM EVERY MORNING SO I WAKE UP AT 4:30AM TO GO TO MY 7:15AM BODY CONDITIONING CLASS.

maybe i am overreacting and it was one of those things thats like a fatherly kind of thing. like how sometimes you might meet a nice man who works at a shop and you see him as like a father figure of sorts yk. but like i really REALLY was not getting that vibe. like at some points i was 'like yea cool okay mayb im wrong and ur just a wise man talking life to a kid you met at the bus stop', but then he'd just keep talking. and yk how theres like a line of where something is like too much to say right. like its a common sense thing to know when you're a GROWN person and you first meet someone who is damn younger than you and could pass as a minor, you dont ask like where they live what highschool they went to, (i forgot to mention but yea he asked me that) or dump a bunch of your life on them. like he told me what highschool he went to, what elementary school he went to, what state it was in, and how he was born and raised there, where he used to work, how he had a motercycle and went 160mph coming off the freeway like an idiot, what car i should get when i decide to start drive instead of taking the bus, how cute it is that my name is so similar to a brand (like a one letter difference so he noticed it right away and was like "ohh thats so cool, you're so unique thats cute"), and that whole ex's brother thing was weird too like idk i feel like you wouldnt ask "who's your dad?" but rather ask like "does [name] happen to be your father?" or something yk. NOT TO MENTION THE LISENCE SUSPENDED FOR THREE YEARS NOW ONE YEAR LEFT THING TOO LIKE 😭 OKAY WHY WOULD YOU TELL ANYONE YOU JUST MET AB THAT😭😭😭

anyway yea i just didnt get the friendly older man you see in those heart touching movies kinda vibe. more like grown man finds a young girl sitting alone at the bus stop and dumps his life story on her to hopefully rush into some sort of relationship with her kinda vibe. (like those situations ((a lot of the time in fiction lol)) where you meet someone for the first time at a bar or something and you talk the whole damn night and either go home knowing everything ab eachother and planning on meeting again or having fucked in the backseat of one of your cars kinda rush i mean) IDK MAN it was like a scary unsettling kinda vibe yk. it was obv he had so much more he wanted to say bc he was like ig stopping himself?? idk how to elaborate on that but when the bus finally arrived he sighed like "aw the bus is here" so i feel like he wanted to talk with me more.

TL;DR im never taking the 7AM bus instead of the 6AM bus again because of a man i met on a cold wednesday morning 😀👍 happy day everyone

[meanderfall]

i am Shooketh, i was watching this interview with this expert on adhd, and he offered this new perspective (to me at least!!) on impulsiveness and creativity, that “creativity is just impulsiveness done right” and im losing my shit, i always thought i wasn’t all that impulsive but what if that’s because it all just channeled into my fucking thousands of fic ideas

[shotorozu]

i feel like im annoying lol but here i am again 🥴

🥴 how do da boys react to a super bimbo mc like shes busty, sweet, innocent, helpful as much as she can be and doesnt really realize when people are hitting on her, she just thinks theyre being extra friendly. (Tamaki, izuku, shoto, denki, bakougo) or any of ur choice

Sorry if I’m being annoying ( •᷄ὤ•᷅)？ and tysm

bimbo s/o

character(s) : bakugou katsuki, todoroki shouto, amajiki tamaki (bnha)

probably (?) part one // ?

legend : [Y/N = your name] female! s/o, quirk not specific

headcanon type : fluff, crack (x reader)

note(s) : sooo 🤩 it’s my birthday tomorrow, not excited about that?? not sure! but im definitely gonna post more tomorrow, just because

»»————-　♡　————-««

bakugou katsuki

you didn’t seem like his type tbh. you’re kinda an airhead, and you’re sweet and helpful to everyone

and awfully innocent,,

so, you seemed like the person that bakugou would try and stay away from, but nope!

not in this case. i’m not sure what conspired in this explosive blond’s head, but he had a oddly specific attraction to you

he used to hate being around you, but it’s also quite entertaining being around you but why, you may ask?

not only are you super nice, and helpful, but you’re very likable too! which caused you to get secret admirers, and fanboys

but you also so happen to be clueless as fuck, so katsuki would always stick around— obviously very amused, only to tell you what their true intentions are

“what do they mean, go out? like,, outside?”

“no, dumbo. they wanna date you.”

“..like the calendar?”

“hah?? are you dumb?” he actually hated how oblivious you were at first, but he just got used to it

but this clueless airhead trait of yours is what he also hates, because when he developed feelings for you— he’d have to tell you

and,, he’s not the best with being direct with romantic stuff. so— you can see how that went.

he ended up confessing you in the most direct way he could’ve said it, but you still. didn’t. understand.

“fuck sake, i want to be your significant other. your fucking lover, the bitch that’ll be with you until this dumbass brain of yours stops working.”

okay, he was a little too direct, but at least you know his feelings!

when you both finally get together, everyone is shocked. like,, you, the sweetheart that likes helping people— dating thee bakugou katsuki??

everyone thought you were threatened to date him, because you didn’t understand other people’s advances— but in reality, katsuki just told you what he felt

straight from the heart.

also, since you’re also quite busty, katsuki loves sleeping on them— he literally won’t sleep, until he has his head resting on those milkers of yours

“maybe this is all you’re good for, huh? a fuckin’ head rest. there might not be anything up there, but at least it gives me some good fuckin’ sleep.”

he,, doesn’t mean that. you’re useful in so many other ways, but he loves pretending that he thinks that way, because of your replies

“ah, yes! i’m fine with being your head rest, katsuki. rest well, love!”

you’re not hurt, because he makes it a point to tell you multiple times a day that you mean lots to him.

but he gets super mad when people tell you that you’re stupid. because he can only tell you that!!

todoroki shouto

you also didn’t seem like you’d be his type,, everyone thought he would’ve wanted someone that’s smart as momo, or something similar

but he’s very content with being with you, for reasons he can’t seem to figure out.

he has his habit of watching you help people from afar, and he couldn’t help but smile whenever he engages in conversations with you

yeah sure, you might be more of an airhead than most people— but you have a heart of gold! and that’s what gathered his attention

sometimes, he’s quite clueless to some social cues— but even he can connect the dots

which you can’t seem to do. but you’re in luck! shouto’s usually the one that tells you what they mean

it’s something he loves and hates, only because of how popular you are with people in general.

sometimes, shouto debates if he should even tell you what they mean— because well,, he likes you.

usually, shouto would interpret things to you like this

“,, they like you,, romantically.”

“shou, are you sure? they look like they wanna be my friend!” he lets you call him by his first name, just because of how content you look by calling him ‘shouto’

he ends up whispering something into your ear, and your eyes light up in realization. “oh! so how princess bubblegum likes marceline?”

“,, yeah.”

but being shouto todoroki has it’s advantages. he isn’t afraid of being as direct as he could possibly be.

“may i have the honor of being your lifelong partner?”

“..?”

“oh, romantically. i’d love to be your lover, Y/N.”

“..oh! that’s what you meant.”

the way he sees you stumble with your words, as you pace back in forth— completely flustered by his words

makes him smile

and it all ends well when his friends see that his wallpaper is literally him laying down on your chest

which is something he always wanted to do

“shouto,, did you finally confess?!”

“yes. they said yes.”

they’re not really surprised that you understood, courtesy to shouto’s bluntness.

he is your protector against all of the people that make you seem useless. man literally lashed out when his father asked him to date someone with ‘more intelligence’

“Y/N may not be the definition of being book smart, but Y/N’s not useless!”

in short— he’s the bimbo protector! he’ll always be patient around you, and he would never dare to dumb you down.

amajiki tamaki

oh lOrd, please help him

you’re so kind, sweet, and helpful. you’d help anyone— regardless of their personality. and that’s what made tamaki interested in you

but you’re also very popular. which he could see why— since you’re attractive in a unique and special way.

tamaki absolutely disliked the idea of your kindness being taken advantaged of. i mean,, the guts of some people!

but he also hated being the one to break the news to you good or bad

he’s not good with the blunt stuff either, and he might’ve been worried about being around you— because well,, you look like you wouldn’t even hurt a fly.

“tamaki, what do they mean by ‘coming home with them for a nice time’ do they.. want to play mario cart with me?”

he looks like he needs to pass out, but he ends up telling you anyway. he’s just lucky that you could hear him.

but he sighs in relief when you end up kindly declining

nejire and mirio are SO amused by this pairing. i mean, it’s an interesting dynamic! how could they not be invested?

yet, they refuse to even explain things to you, especially when tamaki’s around to do said explaining

because apparently, ‘it’ll help you socialize more, especially with Y/N!’

but remember when i said that tamaki wasn’t great with the blunt approach? yeah— he’d have a heart attack, just trying to explain his feelings

“i— uhm how do i say this,, would you like t-to go out for some dinner with m-me?”

“oh sure! i should go tell mirio and nejire” you’d say that with a smile, and it felt like he was going to pass away on the spot.

nejire and mirio were the ones the tell you that ‘no, tamaki doesn’t want to be friendly with you, because he wants to romantically date you.’

and it felt like forever when they were explaining how and why, while tamaki was sitting in the corner.

but thank GOD! because you like him too!

super hesitant on resting on your chest, i mean,, to him, it looked like the nicest pillow for the deepest sleep! but he wasn’t sure if that’d be okay

because no!! to!! taking!! advantage!! of!! Y/N’s!! kindness!!

speaking of that, despite the fact that he’s socially awkward— he will not hesitate on defending you from any haters!

like, when people say that “tamaki and Y/N are such an awkward couple. tamaki’s super awkward, it looks like there’s nothing in Y/N’s brain. maybe she’s brainless”

because how dare they. not everyone is book smart— but that doesn’t give people the right to call you stupid!

“Y/N’s not brainless! she’s kind, helpful, and the sweetest p-person i have ever met. i suggest you take that back!”

in short— it gives him heart palpitations just having to explain things to you, but at the end of the day, it’s all worth it, if he can be with you

»»————-　♡　————-««

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission

[fabricated-misslieness]

pairing: bokuto, iwaizumi, kageyama, kuroo, miya twins, and ushijima x shorter manager male reader

req: yes | cw: suggestive | 16+

alex: MOST OF THE TALL THIGH GUYS IN HAIKYUU SIMP FOR THE SHORTER MALE MANAGER AFTER THEY FOUND OUT HE LIKES BIG THIGHS(and tits and all that) WHILE THEY TRY TO MAKE THEIRS LOOK BIG AND JUICY????

hcs of tall boys simping for a shorter manager because they like thicc body parts

a/n: i didn’t mention this because i did want to write it, but alex, reqs were closed. unless you suggested this for 1.5k, in which case, just why?

Introduction

A volleyball training camp consisting of some of Japan’s most prominent high schools. Chaotic, right?

Well, many schools came: Aoba Johsai, Fukurodani, Nekoma, Inarizaki, Itachiyama, and Shiratorizawa.

These training camps often led to the teams’ managers getting to know each other better and bonding. And as Itachiyama’s manager, even if most of them were girls, you were no exception.

Which meant, while all the managers collectively did their manager duties like refilling water bottles, you talked.

And, for some reason, the topic of boys came along and what ‘type’ of boy they liked.

You see, the girls were nice. They looked for personalities, rather than body parts - most of them anyway.

You on the other hand, well, you loved thick boys.

Prominent man boobs, thick thighs, fat asses.

“Is that… why you became a manager?”

“Is that why you don’t hand out towels?”

Unbeknownst to you, and the girls, a few people were eavesdropping on you.

 

Bokuto

“I’d say that fits your description, right Bokuto?” Konoha playfully elbowed him on the chest, but the ace wasn’t paying attention. “Eh, Bokutooo? You there?”

He was not, in fact, there.

He really had no plan to charm you at all. If he already had these traits, surely your eyes would drift off to him, right?

But obviously, he subconsciously starts showing off more when you’re watching his match.

He starts glancing at you every time he scores a point. Slowly, glances turn into looks that ask for praise, like a puppy; and then looks turn into verbal “Did you see that (y/n)?!”

You don’t know when or why he started fixating on you, but you certainly weren’t complaining.

Thanks to your praise, Bokuto slowly starts getting more comfortable around you. Then, one day after he scores the game winning point, he runs over to you.

Before you know it, he’s pulled you into a hug.

“WOO (Y/N), DID YOU SEE THAT?!”

But you don’t reply, because 1) you can’t with your face smushed against man boobies, and 2) this is heaven.

Bokuto’s confused, of course, until he realizes your hands on his thighs.

He only laughs it off, until Komori comes. Behind the libero is a possessive looking Sakusa and a scary Iizuna. Komori’s about to spew some protective comment like, “hands of our manager” but you stop him.

The will to stay in this bear hug is stronger than the boobies giving you an inability to speak. “Let me have this, Komori.”

“Ah, right, you like this kind of stuff.” The libero laughs, slowly nudging Sakusa and Iizuna away. 

“What’s this kind of stuff?”

“You, hot stuff.”

 

Iwaizumi

“Iwa-chan, you’re not gonna leave me for him, righ-?”

“Shut up, Oikawa.”

It starts off subtle, wiping off sweat from his face with the bottom of his shirt and making sure to expose his pecs. Though such a thing works when there’s no other thicc boy in the room.

Then he starts stretching more often, particularly his legs.

Sometimes, on particularly hot days, he rolls his shorts even higher up his thigh.

Slowly, as you start to talk more often, he does the same things while you’re hanging out relatively alone.

“Hajime.” 

“Hm?” He stops his stretching, looking at you curiously. You lick your lips, your gaze looking at his thighs.

“Keep stretching.”

He obeys. His thighs flex and stiffen, the stretching starts getting painful, but he doesn’t stop because he knows you like it. When you press a hand against his thigh, he lets out a low groan.

“Fuck, Hajime.”

Finally, he knows you’re absolutely enamoured with his body.

 

Kageyama

“None of us fit that description.”

“Shut up, boke.”

“I mean...you fit that description?”

Each time he knows his gaze is on you, as he’s in the back line ready to receive a serve, he sticks out his ass just that little bit more. Along with tensing his thighs.

Sometimes he drags Hinata to receive his serves somewhere within your vicinity. When Hinata receives it and sends it back to him, he doesn’t catch it. Instead, he lets it fall so that you can watch him bend over to grab it.

He might even shake his ass a little.

One time, when something accidentally falls out of his hands, you confront him.

“Tobio, you’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you?”

“Doing what?” He looks at you through his lashes - up for once, booty out and still bending over. Then he has the audacity to shake his bubble butt.

He smiles when you let out a frustrated groan. “That.”

“I still don’t know what you’re referring to.”

 

Kuroo

“Ha, that sorta fits Kuroo. Wait, Kuroo, are you-?”

“Yes, absolutely, yes.”

You know that extremely flexible receive? Yeah? Expect to see that a lot.

It shows off his ass and thighs and just- umph im such a simp

Unlike most others, he’s much more forward about it than others. He won’t outright say it, granted, but he’ll be more touchy with you.

One second, his arm is wrapped around your shoulder. The next, he’s pulled the back of your head to one of his pecs. 

When your team spots this, they rush over to get him to stop. At the forefront of the group is Iizuna. “Hands off our manager.”

Before you can say anything, Kuroo speaks up, “Last time I checked, (y/n)’s his own person. Besides, he enjoy this, right?”

“Yeah.” You don’t defend yourself from Iizuna, because hell, the captain banter is entertainment.

The two captains glare at each other with their competitive yet polite looks. Eventually, Iizuna falters. He can’t argue with you saying you like it, nor does he have the comebacks in him to talk to the ‘provocative expert’.

 

Atsumu Miya

The twins stare at each other, glaring as they usually do. “Dibs.” Atsumu says, and Osamu can’t deny that. It seems he’s missed out on you.

Just like Kuroo, Atsumu is forward.

He is also impatient, so if you don’t catch on the first few times, he’s just going to blur it out.

And that is exactly what happens.

Each time he tries to get your attention, he fails. A subtle wink sent your way, a flex of his bicep, bending and holding on to his knees after a loss penalty, none of them seem to alert you. They don’t, because he’s dumb and doesn’t think to show off the qualities that you like as much as the qualities that he’s confident in.

Which is why he’s here, in front of you while you take a break on the bleachers.

“Miya-san? Don’t you have a game?” You glance down at the court, seeing the rest of Inarizaki playing. They certainly aren’t at their best without their genius setter.

“I like you.”

Your raised eyebrow only taunts him, “And what brought this upon-”

“I know you like me.” He sits next to you, slinging his thighs over your lap. “Don’t you like these thighs?”

“I guess I do, ‘Tsumu.”

 

Osamu Miya

The twins stare at each other, glaring as they usually do. “Dibs.” Osamu calls. Even if Atsumu grumbles and kicks at the ground because he’s missed the opportunity, he can’t deny the power of dibs.

He’s much better at this than Atsumu is. He’s more patient and has no problem with playing the long game.

However, he doesn’t; because unlike Atsumu, he accentuates his qualities that you like.

He pulls up the bottom of his shirt to wipe his face, rolls up his shorts quite high, and generally does things that always have your eyes on his thighs, pecs, or ass.

He’s taunting you, silently telling you to come to him, so that’s what you do.

The next time you find him panting from a run, ass out and bent over, you confront him. Conveniently enough, he’s away from other people.

You make your presence known by putting a hand half on his ass, half on his thigh.

“Oh, heeey, (y/n).” He gives you an all-knowing look, paired with lazy half lidded eyes.

“You know why I’m here, don’t you, ‘Samu?”

“Obviously.”

 

Ushijima Wakatoshi

“I like thick men, the ones with prominent pecs, thick thighs, and bubble butts.”

Sure, he heard it. Sure, he processed it. But did he think about it afterwards? No. Did he connect the dots? No.

In fact, you’re the one attracted to him.

Ushijima is that one oblivious yet extremely suggestive individual. He does squats after practice, thigh-accentuating stretches, bends over without a single thought, this man is blatantly sexy.

You have to keep yourself from doing anything indecent.

So, it’s quite obvious you like him. Anytime he’s in the room, you’re staring at him. As such, Sakusa takes notice, and boy is he disgusted.

“(y/n), please don’t like him.”

Why? He didn’t want to let you date him, it’d turn you into a reminder of one of his most formidable opponents.

“Sakusa, I can’t help it.”

Welp, he’s doomed.

“(y/n), hey.” You’d never really interacted before you approached him. He noticed that you always looked at him, but he didn’t really think about it, nor did he think about why you did it. There were more important things to focus on.

“I like you.”

“Huh?”

He’s so dense, so oblivious, gosh. Good luck with him.

[southieparkie]

SPOILER WARNING: SP POST COVIDE: RETURN OF COVID!!!!!!!

Okay soooo there’s a lot to unpack here.

- First of all, the four boys chanting “Let’s go Nuggets” at the beginning made my heart so happy omg.

- OMFG STAN BURN FARM AND SHELLY FUNERAL WE SAW IT ALL YOU GUYS HHHHHHHH (SHARON’S VA ATE THAT FUNERAL SCENE UP THE REALISM HAD ME CRYINGGGG)

- the fight scene with token was so random and unexpected but i stg it may have been the second greatest thing in this special lmao

- tweek standing up and saying that he’ll do whatever he can to help stop covid just…it’s great. like, yes nervous blond man, you go find that tin foil with ur husband

- the whole anne frank reference they did with menorah was okay ig

- the scene where craig n those guys realize they need tin foil and connecting the dots as to who victor chaos really is was fucking brilliant. we as an audience already figured out that vic is actually butters wayy before this special even aired, the beauty of it all is that the audience knows, but the characters dont. so seeing them put the pieces together and letting the mystery reveal itself was not only satisfying to watch but also really clever. like, wendy and token and all those guys didn’t say what they were thinking, but we KNEW what they were thinking. (i suck at analyzing things dont come for me pls i just think its neat :( )

- BUTERS!’dnsjskxkw

- wait no VIC

- butters being an NFT salesman is the LAST thing i predicted for this special but ykw? i’m nOT mad at it

- BUTTERS CALLED KENNY “KEN” DID YOU GUYS HEAR HIM.

- why did we have to see his penis tho

- and we saw kenny’s dead penis in the last special like omg stop i can’t keep defending u guys, matt n trey

- CRAIG N TWEEK GOT KNOCKED TF OUT PLEASEEEEEEE

- Tweek pointing and screaming when Craig got his shit rocked is so him

- kyle having an alexa and being scared shitless from said alexa going bonkers was a good laugh

- clyde’s villian origin story was definitely something

- the scene where stan is comforting wendy with the wet rag after the whole NFT attack thingy butters did was so wholesome i was smiling through the whole thing

- THE PART WHERE KYLE STARTED WIPING TOKEN’S PHONE WITH THE RAG TOOK ME OUT

- speaking of that cartman taking butters to the lab KNOWING that butters’ NFT shtick can cause major chaos (see what i did there) was pretty smart

- IKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- let’s talk about the fight between eric and kyle cause y’all already know that kyman shippers will use the clip of eric rocking kyle’s shit to prove that kyle is indeed a submissive uwu boy and cartman is a big dom. maybe im over exaggerating, but there are people out there who think like this still and its dumb

- we’ll save that convo for another day. anyways, the two alexas kicking butters’ ass in the pews made me snort

- eric’s baby is a little shit

- clyde’s dramatic walk he does when he’s about to k-word kyle in the past is freaking hilarious to me.

- WHY DID CLYDE HAVE TO D!3 WTH IS WRONG WITH YALL LET HIM LIVE

- stan, kyle, ken, and eric on the jumbotron at the nuggets game is probably the exact moment in which the south park fandom’s hope for the broship/future episodes was restored

- the letter stan wrote to randy made me SOBBB. HE SAID I LOVE U HNNNNNN

- okay so about the ending

- IKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- STAN IS AN ASTRONAUT OR SOMETHING IM NOT RLLY SURE WHAT HE IS BUT HE ISNT AN ALSCHOHOLIC YES

- uhh….so uh……we all agree that kyle and stan have adopted kids together and that they call him uncle stan just cause they’re confused, yes?? stan and kyle are together and they have children?? do they not?????

- no?? k

- STENDY. WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO ON NEW YEARS?????? MAKE OUT PERHAPS???????????

- if they accidentally reproduce that night and sam marsh becoms canon im gonna drag my teeth against hot concrete

- kenny didn’t get any speaking lines what the fuck matt & trey u had one job

- yall was tweek drinking wine?? material gworl????

- TIMMY OH MY GOD

- TIMMY MY BOY THERE HE GO ON THE SCREEN

- rating: 9.5/10

- bring on the NFT butters/Mad Scientist kenny fanart cowards idc if you suck at rendering or whatever

- AND fanfics don’t forget the fanfics

[antiloreolympus]

10 Anti LO Asks

1. LO fans are like I can justify slavery, I love misogyny, Classism is cool, capitalism is tight, cheating and child abuse is a-ok, mass murder to "insignificant" people is okey-dokey, but I draw the LINE at incest! Like wait, back up a minute -

2. I haven't read LO past Ep 3 for obvious reasons but checked out the Ep 190 everyone was talking about and holy SHIT it's far worse than I could ever dream. The silly sweatdrop on Demeter when Eris brings up what she did looks like a COMEDIC scene. Eris gets stabbed at a lazy horizontal camera angle and then spends the entire time looking mildly weirded out. The stiff dialogue, stick figure poses, choppy transitions. Zeus's hilariously lopsided face when he speaks to Persephone. This is popular??

3. A really short and refreshing HxP WEBTOON I found some time ago that I'd like to recommend is called Awkward Hades. Not only is it pretty damn funny, but Persephone is snarky and cool-headed.

4. be nice to Disney's Hercules. at least it was fun and never said it was accurate, LO on the other hand is a pretentious slog that thinks it's better than all of the ancient poets combained and a feminist magnum opus :/

5. What I find so insulting about LO and "retellings" like it (and I love a happy HXP take! don't get me wrong!) is that they seem to think a woman's "happiness and empowerment" is via the ruin of a mother and daughter relationship and instead through marrying a man, which isn't exactly screaming "feminist' now is it. Why are so many of these "feminist" writers more concerned about the "redemption" of a literal king and do so via the ruin of the female relationship for his benefit?

6. What I find a bit funny is like ... what is Demeter supposed to do in these stories exactly? Because if she gives a damn about her daughter, she's considered "overbearing and abusive" (I'm begging HxP stans to never have kids) but let's say Demeter just doesn't care and never even checks up on her while Persephone is kidnapped, assaulted, etc, she'd then be deemed neglectful and abusive again! Like she can't win with these people no matter what she does.

7. Something that didn’t sit right with me was the reveal of Apollo being Zeus’ son. Beside being extremely obvious, I just didn’t understand why he did it at that moment. Like he doesn’t have persephone meaning he’s not powerful enough to defeat zeus. Now Zeus can connect the dots and see that Apollo wants to over throw him which he can take attention earlier ( which u can say he did by banishing persephone). Which makes me even wonder why he would do that? Am I like missing smth? It just feels kinda dumb which is honestly a problem I had with Apollo as an antagonist. To me The only thing making him a threat is because of what he did to persephone. I think RS wants for us to believe that hes some sort of master manipulator but he really isnt making him such a bad antagonist in my opinion and since I don’t personally care about the threat that PxH are facing Im honestly quite bored.

8. We deserve short kings, chubby kings, fat kings, lanky kings, androgynous kings, trans kings, bi kings, gay kings, kings of all shapes and sizes and creeds, and yet rachel only gives us the same bulky, cishet jokers :/

9. tbh big age gaps in fiction only really work when one is immortal/an immortal fantasy creature like a god and the other is mortal, but then the human is usually like 25+ and had a life well before them, so yeah the age gap is there but the maturity and experience gap really isnt, but in LO rachel purposely made sure they're not aligned in any way (age, power, experience, maturity, etc) that its like why would anyone not find it off putting?? he's always going to have power her no matter what??

10. the "wake up your sister" line can’t be eris though because she was kicked out of the house for trying to murder hera, so why would she still be living with them? it was probably going to be  if rachel even remembered to name them) eileithyia since he's in that group of canon zeus/hera kids along with hebe and ares (which eris usually isnt). if i had to guess if shes introduced itll be solely to help get persephone pregnant since she's a childbirth goddess and hades needs babies :/

[shittybabypostsfordays]

Someone commented on my fic and now I'm sad.

[darkmulti]

passed my chemistry exam. the thing is: i kinda studied with this boy for it. now hear me out: jungkook being proud of me for passing but THEN finding out i studied with this boy and absolutely RAILING me into the next year and tell me im a dumb slut (but HIS good dumb slut yk??)i love me some posessiveness) gosh i need to stop being this horny, this is what 0 dick makes you think about while only focusing on your studies? -🕊

-> congratulations on passing your chemistry exam!! Chem is a pain in the ass. Fucking hate it so much!

-> sorry for any mistakes

⚠️: jealous/possessive sex?

This was the moment you’ve been waiting for

Staring at your laptop screen

Refreshing it over and over with your boyfriend by your side

Your heart was beating so fast

You clicked the refresh bottom once more

“I PASSED!” You yelled, jumping up

Your boyfriend smiled at your cuteness and pulled you in for a hug

“Good job, princess. You’ve been studying so hard. I’m so proud of you, gorgeous.”

He pulled you in for a long kiss which was interrupted by your ringtone

You answered it and yelled, “DID YOU PASS?”

“I PASSED!” He responded

You both started talking about the exam and what not as Jungkook stood there in confusion

Who were you talking to?

“Taehyung thank you for studying with me! You literally helped me in everything! If you didn’t help me, I would’ve probably failed.”

You said with a bright smile on your face

Jungkook’s eyebrows crashed

He was connecting the dots

You said you were going to the library to study alone since the library is a quiet space

You never told him that you’ve been “studying” with this Taehyung guy

He was in deep thought until you hugged him

“What’s wrong? Why are you just standing there with that look on your face?”

“Who’s Taehyung?”

“He’s my chem partner.”

“You’ve never told me about him. You always say that you’re going to study alone.”

“Well he was in the library while I was studying and asked if he can join. I don’t see the problem Jungkook. He helped me a lot.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that but I would like to know when my girlfriend is spending time with another man.”

You rolled your eyes and scoffed

“That’s-”

Jungkook pushed you on the bed and hovered over you

“Don’t show me attitude, princess. I’ll fuck it right out of you.”

He pulled down your pants along with your underwear and flipped you over

He spanked your butt while his other hand took himself out

“Looks like I need to remind you about who you belong to. It seems like you’ve forgotten.”

He spat on his cock and pushed in you, making you moan louder than usual

It had been a while since you two last done it because you were too busy studying

He pulled your hair and wasted no time in slamming in and out of you

His balls clapped against your slit, turning both of you on even more

Jungkook spanked your ass then said, “who the fuck do you belong to, huh?!”

You hold onto the bedsheets for dear life and move your hips with his

He spanked you again and pulled your hair so he can see your face

“I asked you something, now answer it before I get angry. And remember what happened last time you made me angry? I made your little pussy squirt around cock. You were shaking because of it. My cum filled you up to the brim. I’ve owned your body since that day. Remember that.” He bit your ear and fucked you harder

“This pussy is mine! This ass is mine! This body is mine!”

He sucked on your jawline and neck, placing hickeys everywhere

“I won’t let you see Taehyung unless you have my marks all over you. I want it on every inch of your body. Every time he looks at you, he’ll know that you’re my little slut... Mmh? What are you?”

“You’re little slut, daddy.”

“Good girl.”

[sleepysandy]

rewatch fmab ep 1

im rewatching since i read the manga

idk why im watching it again tbh

im a rewatcher what can i say

omg didnt even realize that the fuhrer was the one giving orders

i do not remember thr first ep going like tthid

damn the op spoils a lot

but u dont actually realise its spoilers

i totally thought that the fight between al envy glutonny on the bridge was gonna be s thing

i totally forgot that their voices sound like that

what are they doing in the capital anyways

in the manga i think they had rose first before going to the capital

they introduce a lot of important character early even tho they wont matter until later

ed hair down>>>

damn this ice alchemist is dumb as f

im also surprised that all the important characters in the early parts of the story are still vital until the end

which sounds like it should be a basic trait but a lot of stories abandon like half the cast halfway through

i totally forgot that the ice guy knew

quite a few know abt this grand plan

if the ice guy were smarter he couldve sped up the plot

he just has a pretty dumb plan

the music real good rn

ice guy too rash but he got the idea

ooh the black and white with red

what is this guys plan anyways

i shouldve known from the start that bradley was sus

i mean who stares menacingly

i totally missed the father clip

woah ice guy was supposed to be a pillar

these bitches are flexible changing plans like that

i dont think i saw this preview

e 2

i totally didnt expect their dad to still be alive

how long were they living alone

years???

where are social services

i just love the tiny hands when they do alchemy

what they already teased eastern alchemy

damn winry hard as f

asking a soldier whether or not theyve killed someone

cant believe they also teased sensei also did the taboo

ed has some balls

bradley probably knows right

that ed did the taboo

have they already thought they could be sacrifices

ep 3

pretty solid magic structure

the titles go hard as f

city of heresy

thats a slay

rlly asking a normal person to kill someone lmao

even the chimera has signs of transmutation

love the consistency

i also like that u have to may physical contact in order to transmute something

even with the stone

he made a fancy door lmao while escaping

cant believe its been a decade and nothing has come close this show

the 7 were def the best red herring

i totally thought that bradley was the big bad

did not expect the conflict to be deep

thought it would just be abt getting to the stone quicker

ep 4

cant believe scar was introduced pretty late

this manga is so well thought out

like every dot connects so well

cant believe they teased yoki as well

wtf was i not paying attention

sewing life alchemist??

thats too on the nose

bradley knew what was up

he was so sus already

like the hidden eyes

shady glasses

cant u just be a regular alchemist

like im pretty sure he can make a living being a normal alchemist

like cant he be a teacher

up to this point i thought the show was gonna be like a monster of thr week type of show

he fr looks scary

scar looked cool then

the lightning??

amazing

that episode went by so fast

ep 5

rain of sorrows???

amaxing

cant believe lior is real

totally thought lust was the boss of the operation

if villain why hot

hmmm so i think ever since ed took the alchemist exam he was already in line for the sacrifice

kinda funny that scar never got a name

scars the only one who got ed as the fullmetal alchemist right

thats literally a kid scar

he was a baby when the war started

riza ure so cool

armstrong the worst person to fight this guy

since hes the strongest when makes contact but thats also scars gig

woah resembool and ishval are pretty close

WINRY <<33