#im super duper happy about my whole life rn

[rowanhoney]

can’t express how wonderful the changes have been in my life this past month. I’m beyond grateful and so full of love and joy

[charkie-ee]

Hi! Hope you don't mind me lurking around these parts, sir. I came to ask you a few questions regarding your experience as a qsmp enjoyer!!

• Who's your favourite streamer that speaks the same language as you?

• Who's your favourite streamer that DOESN'T speak the same language as you?

• What's been your favourite arc so far?

• What language would you like to see next?

• Who do you want to watch more of?

• Who's your favourite family?

• Who's streams do you most watch outside of their QSMP streams?

Anything else you'd like to mention? Doesn't inherently have to be qsmp related.

(These are all from sarcastictissy, Hope you're doing well, Sphatos!!:D)

gkgjfhvkhkhKhkHkHkBk

hi howdy semifontos

you came straight out of the deep-dark-endless void didn’t you? (this ask caught me so off guard AHEM)

anyway!! answering questions time!! yippee! (i never get to do this!! i am so happi!!)

. i have a lot of favorite english speaker streamers but the ones i’m currently watching the most are slimecicle and philza. i’ve been following the both of them for many years and i was super duper excited to see both of them join the qsmp when it first started!! they’re both so silly goofy and they live in my head rent free.

. oooooouuuuuuhhhh. that’s hard. can i give you tops? it’s definitely between cellbit, baghera, etoiles and roier. although i don’t know what they’re saying half of the time, tuning into their streams is always fun! whenever they’re laughing on stream i find myself smiling too! i’ve also been inspired to learn other languages because of them. (i have like 15 languages that im working on in duolingo. don’t ask) they’re also AMAZING at lore. (especially roier. his character is so sad. he is quite literally the therapist who needs therapy.)

. there are so many arcs that have gone on in qsmp(and to be honest i’m having trouble keeping up) but i really like charlie’s whole traumatized dad/code arc so far?? like- i doubt he’ll ever finish it, but i live for little delulu cubitos with dead eggs. ^^

also, no idea if it counts (since it was kind of a saga???) but BOLAS will always have a place in my heart. love them to death (and they died A LOT.)

. i’d really like to see swedish creators next!! i think that would be really cool!! :-D

. this question is questioning fjjfjgjfhfjgjjfjfjg. rn i’ve kind of been taking a break? not really paying attention to the recent lore in qsmp?? idk. the life rollercoaster has been MOVING. there are so many bumps. and it’s been difficult to find the time to catch up. if i were to start watching consistently again, i’d love to watch some of the korean creators that have joined, more foolish, and more tubbo.

. favorite family is probably death family and misclick/dysfunctional family (yk. since i watch those creators the most) but i also really like the family dynamics of the found family of fobo. tubbo and foolish are a dangerously silly pair and i think the name ‘fobo’ says a lot about them

. i definitely watch slimecicle the most. i hardly make to any if his streams, but i am a vod truther. i remember when his 1st wobble dogs vid came out and honestly cant believe its been a year. (also idk if it counts but i’ve been listening to so much jrwi. got the patreon member ship and i listened to 6 episodes of the suckening within 3ish days. help.)

oKay i think that’s all i have to say (sorry for the paragraph)

thank you so much semifontos and sarcastictissy for the questions!! i hope you are both doing well and thanks for checking in on me! :-D

[hongism]

okay hi. so. first of all this incredible and stunning banner was made by the talented and lovely @hobiance​! the banner at the bottom was made by the equally talented and lovely thot @franklytae​, and i’m so so grateful to both of them for helping me out with this and am really touched to have their creations on this post. now. it is absolutely unreal that i am making this post. it’s crazy to see how my blog and i have grown in the past year and a half, and im so grateful for every single one of you who follows me, whether you are an active follower or not. also this is absolutely insane because in just six months you all have made my following nearly quadruple and that’s absolutely bonkers on so many levels. while 2020 has been tumultuous for us all, i cannot argue the fact that it has been my best year on tumblr so far. 

i have been able to meet so many fantastic people, grow friendships, grow my skills as a writer, gain confidence, and i have found friendships that are so treasured and valuable in so many ways. i’m really so so grateful for this platform and for the opportunity to share my work here with you all.

i really don’t know how to verbalize how i’m feeling because on one hand, followers are just a number and it’s unimportant in the long run. on the other hand i truly am grateful for every single one off you and i want you to know how grateful i am. but i really don’t want this to be about me because i really wouldn’t be on tumblr still without the people i’ve met along the way. through tumblr i have found lifelong friends who are beautiful inside and out and i will never stop being grateful to know them and walk this path alongside them. it’s truly a blessing and i feel so so lucky to get to know them. cue the ridiculously long tags of people whom i love and cherish so so much. i apologize in advance because no matter how many times i stare at this post and try to remember and get every single person who is valuable to me, i know i will inevitable forget someone so i am very very sorry if i miss anyone.

*•.¸♡ ✧ 𝓂𝓊𝓉𝓊𝒶𝓁𝓈 ✧ ♡¸.•*

@hobicomeholla29 @thatmultifandomhoe @yoongi-sugaglider @strawbxxymilk @meowxyoong @blondenamjin​ @dee-ehn​ @a-tiny-8iny​ @atiny-dazzlinglight​ @atiny-piratequeen​ @atiny-wooyoung​ @kesmonster​ @theredcarat​ @enchantedyeo​ @seonghwabrainworms​ @jintobean​ @jinterlude​ @joonsrack​ @moonmintrails​ @inkedxclouds​ @koophoriia​ @kimcritique​ @moonpjms​ @daechwlta​ @suhdays​ @ppersonna​ @vivpurple7​ @ironicarmy​ @joopiterjoon​ @btsxdoll​ @btsbiaswreckedwriting​ @minniepetals​ @chillingtae​ @searchingtae​ @ladyartemesia​ @staerrylights​ and many others who i literally cannot for the life of me remember right when it’s important aoifdjjioejsoi some of you guys i only really talk to on discord, but i think that’s where i talk to people the most anyways. i know im really bad at following people so i may miss a few of you here and there, but know that our friendship through tumblr and discord is so valuable and important to me and im grateful for all of you 💕

*•.¸♡ ✧ 𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓉𝓈 ✧ ♡¸.•*

@yolokoo​ @franklytae

hhhhh you two little shits honestly i know i won’t be able to tell the two of you how much you mean to me because words are Hard. still i am so so lucky to know the two of you and so so lucky to be able to be friends with you two. y’all know i would swing so fucking hard for you that i would dislocate a shoulder but it would be worth in. i love you both so so much and know that no matter what paths we all take in life, i will always be here to support you and cheer you on along the way

*•.¸♡ ✧ 𝓂𝓊𝓈𝓀𝑒𝓉𝑒𝑒𝓇𝓈 ✧ ♡¸.•*

@hobiance @miamorjoon​

lainey within ten minutes of meeting you on discord i married you iajoidfoisdjfo. honestly that’s the boldest i’ve ever been, but i’m really grateful that i stepped out of my comfort zone and interacted with you because if not i would be missing out on such a crazy crackhead amazing friendship that’s filled with rats and roaches and annoying atlas bc we love her. sometimes it’s scary how similar we are but i love our late night crazy music sessions and your passion for cowboys 🐀🤠

atlas i honestly do Not remember how we met aoidjfoij pls don’t be offended i don’t remember how i meet anyone. i only remember meeting lainey because she reminded me of it the other day. but anyways i am super glad that we started talking because you’re one of tha craziest wackiest zackiest ladiez i’ve ever met and you really unleash the inner crazy in me (in a good way i swear). even though you tell me to shut up most of the time, you are seriously one of my fav writers out there and so knowing you and being your friend is seriously w o a h and a blessing for sure 🐀

*•.¸♡ ✧ 𝓈𝓅𝑒𝒸𝒾𝒶𝓁𝓈 ✧ ♡¸.•*

@jamaisjoons @honeymoonjin @ddaenggtan @cest-la-tae​ @bangtiddies​ @mygsii @mindays @luxekook @floralsuga 

oh god i hope im not forgetting anyone hhafhiuehisuda oKAY you each are super duper special to me in your own special way and i could sit here for literally hours and ramble on about how much i love each of you. the basic fact of the matter is that each of you have impacted me and my life in some way.

sol, sora, bette - i am so lucky to have been able to meet you and work alongside you and talk to you daily. it’s normally extremely hard to work with friends or make friends through work, but i got so lucky with you guys and am so blessed to get to talk to each of you and know you ((special thanks to sol for Obey Me and 7 demon daddies)) ((another special thanks to backbone bette for having the courage to speak up when no one else does)) ((one more super special thanks to miss sora who is the kindest and sweetest ball of uwu i’ve ever known and Stan the Man the Icon and the limbless basketball game story remains Iconic))

dAIJA gahhh im so lucky to know you, you are such a valuable and incredible friend. you have a huge heart and you’re always looking out for other people. as much as i love screaming about hyunjin and victon with you, i really love just getting to chat with you in general because you’re so sweet and loving :ragecry:

e m i omg i wish i could remember when we first started talking bc i feel like it was some crackhead energy but honestly i feel like we have that crackhead energy 24/7. i really love listening to your stories because you have such a knack for storytelling which duh of course you do you’re an actress you know how to tell a story, but also you are just fun and exciting to get to talk to.

renae my lovely spiritual girlfriend you are such a wholesome sweet soul on every level w o w you have a heart of gold and you are so talented and wonderful as well, truly the whole package and a half, and you are such a good friend. somehow i only recently found out that you’re a multi but having listening parties with you (even if discord doesn’t tell us we’re listening together) is so fun and i just love chatting with you

reese omg i dont appreciate how you attack me with jisung and hyunjin but we are linked because we both switched to jungkook urls aoijsdfoij you’re such a fun person to talk to and i love getting to talk to you more and getting to know you better because you’re so sweet and loving and have a love of tea that rivals emi’s and mine which is crazy

monday mondayyyyyyy omg i remember the first time we talked was in a kakao chat about the flower shop story and i was Shook because i loVE your works and you were talking about how you liked mine and i was internally p a n i c k so bad ajflkjflk but after that we started getting to know each other better and we started the bee gang then we bonded over piercings and honestly you are just such a cool gal. like wow a queen. idek what else to say other than you are so cool i wish i was half as cool as you asoifjiof but really ily lots uwu

and last but really absolutely not least, mr. beau. wow i feel like it’s been such a long time since we met and started talking to each other. you were one of the very first people i talked to on tumblr, and you welcomed me so swiftly and with open arms. i know i can really rely on you and trust you, you are such a valuable friend, and i love being able to talk with you. i am so beyond proud of you, i know both alex and i are so so proud and happy for you, and i am so proud to be able to watch you grow into the person you are and deadass im crying rn just because im so proud and lucky to have been able to talk with you and help you. you know things about me that no one else does hehe and you are truly such a valuable and wonderful friend on so many levels. i will always always always be able to say that i am proud to be your friend and proud to know you 🤧

[chittapornswife]

not to be weird but im @ lofeel and JAJSJDJ I LOVE YOUR DREAM DNYL CLUB SERIES SM!!!!!!!! literally it’s the no.1 fanfic ive read like Ever!!! i love it sm 😚🥰 my faves r dnyl club + a discontinued nct cam boy (jaehyun focused) and a random kai one but dnyl is miles ahead the other two 😩😩😩 i hope you’ve been doing well!! ik as a content creator (albeit editing photos is v diff from writing) it can be stressful esp as you get more messages abt your work bcos you become more conscious about it but please know anything you put out will be awesome!! ive read your other writing too and it’s all 10/10 immaculate!!!!!!!! (not that i am one to judge another’s work omg i hope that didn’t sound pretentious in any way!) sorry i know you didn’t expect an essay from rbing fruit but 😭 i saw my opportunity and took it! have a wonderful rest of your week!!

NOT WEIRD AT ALL!!! i’m actually super duper happy from this omg and just so unexpected??? your blog showed up in my recommended and i love following blogs for their aesthetics but to hear that you’ve read my work my mind is just 😳💥 i’m going to be finishing it off for this summer just bc i’ve been dragging it on for way too long now but thank you seriously so much!!!! 💗😭💗 you have no idea how much this means to me and you’re not being pretentious at all!! but pls spare details about your kai recommendation🙇🏻‍♀️ (since the jaehyun one is discontinued 😔) also for me I find it nice when ppl let me know what they liked to read and it’s a boost to remind me to keep writing! i’m v lazy and a procrastinator too and even though it may be stressful to think abt “i should rlly get back to dnyl club and my other unfinished fic” i know if i don’t get reminded or encouraged to then i’ll just never finish anything 😩 your words have made my whole month & a week and by that i mean june and july so seriously, thank you for all of the love you’ve sent and i’m sending even more to you!!! i was going to go through your acct today and queue some posts actually!! so it’s nice to meet you :’)) and pls!! i love essay msgs bc i talk a lot too as you can see by this above^ and always take ur opportunities!!! i’m really glad you sent this to the point where i can’t express it properly, i’m just smiling rlly wide irl rn but life is too short! so msging ppl who you miss or want to talk to is always a great thing, that way you don’t think “what if?” later on! okay sorry for going all mom-like on you😭 and judging by just this msg alone, you seem like a wonderful and incredibly kind person so i’m very glad i found your blog only for you to msg such lovely and kind words 🥺💗 from my rbing fruit LOL

have a wonderful rest of your week too!!! make sure to stay hydrated and i hope you have a lovely day too, thank you again💗♥️💗♥️💗♥️💗♥️💗

^the range of emotions i went thru while reading and rereading your msg

[svnarintaro]

1/2 hi!! can i get a BNHA matchup (m or f, i don't care i'm bi) please? i am an 18 y/o female virgo who enjoys snuggles, coloring, disney movies and musicals, dogs, and science. i am an honors student with 2 degrees on track to be an admin for a hospital. i love BNHA and JoJo's. i love laying down, blasting music in my headphones, and just vibing. rn, i like harry styles and tame impala's 'currents' album. i have hella ADD which ends up being a big part of my personality bc i cant focusss

2/2 i'm not afraid to leave my life behind for my future's sake, i've done it before. i'm submissive af and tumblr has given me kitten, daddy, and praise kinks. i like someone who can communicate and who matches my effort in the relationship. i am the one in my family who is always cracking jokes and cleaning. i want to be a stay-at-home mom so so bad. will absolutely sing while cleaning or just always. love to color and paint and be sweet. tysm in advance, i cant wait to see who you pick!!

3/2(??) i'm so sorry, i was gonna be done but then i remembered that i fuckin love fruit and that its an important part of who i am lmao.. i did a whole lot of research to see if a diet consisting of only fruit was a thing i could do (it's not :(((). also i really vibe with genetics, i hate bodily fluids and feet and my biomom and when people lie. also, i have bit my lip in the same spot literally 15 times in the last 3 days and im in PAIN. ok, now i'm done, so sorry for the continuation lmao

~~~

i match you up with... 

toga !!

- this girl can get super duper soft

- she is super intimate

- she would love nothing more than to drshown you with her affection and love 

- she probably has never watched a disney movie before she met you 

- her favourite would probably be beauty and the beast or lilo and stich 

- it just reminds her of your relationship, without you she kind of is a lost soul 

- she suggests that ‘falling’ would be your guy’s song 

- let me tell you this girl has got PIPES

- she is super understanding, but she won’t mind if you were to space out every now and then cause she does that too 

- i’m not gonna go into some nsfw type stuff 

- but i know for a fact this girl is sadistic

-  sorry im a baby and i don’t like writing about that type of stuff 0.0

- she lives for that domestic stuff

- she is very well aware that what she does is quite hard and she wants to protect you at all times so he would rather you to stay home so you’re safe

- she would let you paint and add splashes of colour to anything in the house

“BABEEEEE I GOT SOME PAINNTTTTT”

- she gets really concerned about your health when you forget about it 

“you need to take care of yourself, and eat more,”

“I GOT SNACKSS~”

“i will love no matter what, as long as you eat your meals and stay safe i will be happy,”

-  10/10 girlfriend in my opinion

[justwenchthings]

good bye 2019

IM GOING BACK HOME!!!!! LOL WOOHOO

Plans for Vegas fell through and I lost money but it’s okay, that’s life!! I basically just used my Christmas money to buy my ticket back home so all is well. i’m super happy going home because I was not about to spend NYE alone LOL. 

Let’s recap what happened in 2019. this may be long.

Education: I finished capstone which was lowkey a pain in the butt but I made it. I graduated college! I got my NRP certification. 

Work: I finished my time at 24 Hour Fitness. It’s crazy because it was the longest time I’ve ever worked at a part time job. I’m so surprised at the friendships I made there and the drama I caused there HAHA. I am still in touch with Christina and Tyler since they were my closest friends at the gym. Even though they can get on my nerves sometimes, they are good friends to me. They listen to my problems and vice versa! My manager Bre still keeps in touch here and there. We text eachother on holidays haha. I completed my temporary job at Stanford which was very interesting. Did not expect much drama from a temp job but oh it happened. Overall, it was a good experience and now I am not afraid of giving injections because it’s literally so easy. I was supposed to start working at the hospital in December but my license did not go through on time so now it’s March. I am still upset at the BRN for this but I try telling myself that I will eventually start and everything will be okay. It just kind of sucks because it delayed my plans to move to NY by a couple months.

Family: I guess I got even closer to my family? Kind of hard to say but yeah I guess I can say that. i am closer to my sister even more. She knows about my septum piercing lmao. My mom knows about my nipple piercing and surprisingly did not beat my ass about it. I still want to tell my sister about my abortion but there just hasn’t been a right time so it will happen when it happens. I guess I’m closer to my grandparents as well. Since moving to Seattle, I have not answered my grandpa’s phone calls because I am super nervous talking to him in Korean. But I realized I shouldn’t be. We video chatted yesterday and I showed them my apartment. It was nice! 

Fitness: For a while I was pretty on top of my fitness. I think working at the gym helped me since I was always surrounded by people who loved fitness and having a free membership helped. I worked out a lot with Christina and I think having someone to keep you in check is good. However, since moving to Seattle I havent worked out as much as I want to. I did work out almost everyday for the first month and then kind of stopped. I think it’s just a slump that I always go through. I know I will pick it up again.

Friendship: I can say that I have gotten even closer to Michelle, if that’s even possible. It’s so crazy how there is someone in this world who understands my humor... like thank you Michelle. I got closer to Julie and I’m really happy we are living together again. She is so reassuring and someone I can count on. I got closer to Michael. I don’t know exactly how but it’s amazing to see we still have a strong friendship! i am thankful to all of you guys. I can 100% count on you and I know you are always there for me. thank you for listening to my problems and annoying rants and cringey stories. Know that I will do the same for you guys!! I met a lot of new friends through Julie, which I am so grateful for. All her friends are so awesome. I still feel weird calling some of them “my friends” instead of “Julie’s friends” but I think I can say that Albert is my friend. Perry is my friend. Miles is my friend. But all thanks to Julie :)

Relationships: Lol is there even anything to say about this? I feel like this is all I talk about. I am glad I got over Henry, but I won’t lie he comes to mind sometimes. Not often, not everyday, but like maybe once a month? I call that progress. Something about him just makes it stand out so much. Like I liked him for like 10 months and he strung me along the whole time. I don’t have any positive feelings towards him but he was a lesson. He wrecked me emotionally lol. I think I am traumatized from the events that happened and how he destroyed me emotionally. Even after my breakup with Raymart, I didn’t really have my guards up- like I almost fell for Aldo. But after Henry... my walls have been bUILT. I am scared of telling anyone that I like them, even though they may like me back. I am scared of getting attached emotionally, I am scared of going crazy/obsessive over one person. I will not allow myself to get that way anymore. I hated myself when I liked Henry because I was definitely depressed. I learned that if you don’t show interest through your actions, I am not doing the same. i will not chase you until the end of time because I WILL BE THE ONE CHASED GDI! I still really like Jason and I think he does too (even with receipts, it’s hard for me to believe). It makes me sad that nothing is happening but it is what it is. i’m glad we are still friends and it’s just the distance I guess. A part of me says that I am willing to do LDR, but another part of me really does not. I just wished I was in NY right now living my life with Michelle. It’s so crazy how one person can make me be okay with giving up that California RN salary lol. It’s a compromise that I am very willing to make if it means that I can be with him in the long run. And if things don’t work out, I can always move back to CA if i want! So i don’t think there’s anything to lose. All I can say is, I super duper like him but the feelings are becoming numb because not much is happening. Back burner.

Self: Overall, I think I grew a lot as a person. I see it in myself as well as others. I went through a lot of things that really helped me shape into who I am currently. I learned how to play the uke. I got really into fitness. I am less cancer-y and more capicorn-y. I hope I can continue to grow in 2020 and become an even better person than who I am right now. Here are some of my 2020 goals that I wrote for myself:

- Do well at the hospital :)

- continue to make more friends

- learn something new

- continue working out consistently

- start meditation

- do yoga

- strengthen family relationships

- be financially smart

The first half of 2019 was ASS and the second half was less ass. I hope 2020 is badass.

[vixenfur]

Tag at least 5 people you love and give a few words on why!

OH MY GOODNESS!!!

Since there was so much BS in the fandom today, time to share some love! :)

- @zeta-jane is an absolute godsend of a friend. They are sassy, funny, talkative, energetic and so full of amazing ideas!!! Zeta is always there for me when I need someone to lean on. They’re such a kind friend and they will not hesitate, baitch to fight people who hurt me- probably because they know I’d do the same for them! They’re such good company both online and IRL, and I am blessed to have met them! I am even more blessed to be writing City of Dust and Shadows with them, which has become the longest fic either of us has ever written! We may or may not surpass it with our future collabs, however ;) They are just the coolest person ever and they deserve all the love in the world. I adore them so much!!! TUT 

- @mikayu-chan is such a got damn SWEETHEART. They are trying to see the positive side of things, especially after so much fandom drama in the past, and I’m so so proud of them for trying their hardest to live their best life. They have it way too hard and I want to give them a big ole hug and many days of fun!!! They always make me laugh and we have a great time on calls! I’m glad that we see eye-to-eye on so many things and that we continue to teach each other new things all the time!! They are really an irreplaceable friend and such a joy to talk with, to write with, and to laugh with. I love you Chan

- @crazyloststar deserves the entire world and more!!!! oMg I cannot express how much I love Alex!!!!! Alex is just a big bundle of happiness and fun and she makes me so so so so so so so happy. I love calling with her and talking, I love writing with her and everything else!! We always have so much fun, I swear I can’t talk to her without laughing my ass off at least once XD we’re always DJDJDHDHDHDJD’ing at each other because we just can’t find the right words to express how hard we’re agreeing with each other/laughing omfg. I adore her and I cant WAIT to cosplay KimiYoi and RyuuTenn with her hopefully at next year’s Yaoi Con WOOT WOOT :D!!!!

- @yuudefensesquad is sUCH A GOOD BEAN who deals with SO MUCH and she just needs a big ole hug and lots of Yuuchan i stg. Caydence is such a funny funky lil nugget and I protecc her with my life okay. Her art? Flawless. Her shitposts? FUCKIN HILARIOUS. Her meta? Super engaging and intriguing! Her bravery? ABOVE US ALL LOL. She is just awesome and I’m glad I forcefully adopted her into my lil family of mikayuu nerds bc it just wouldn’t be the same without her. Caydence ily never stop being you. A lot of shit challenges her irl and everywhere else, but she still keeps her head up and man I really respect her.

- @mikaisatop is MY FRICKIN RIGHT HAND MAN. My SOULMATE. SARAHHH I ADORE YOU. You might be busy rn but I love you so much girl ;__; even though she’s busy I always bother her bc I want her to know I wouldn’t ever forget about her!! I’m so happy we got to collab so much and will continue doing so!! Winter’s Waltz is so much fun to write and I’m so happy she is writing it with me anyways despite such a busy schedule. If it weren’t for Sarah we wouldn’t have so much good MikaYuu content and I applaud her for it!!

- @6lilystrings9 IS JUST THE BOMB DOT FUCKIN COM. Lily and I didn’t super duper connect until more recently but omg talking with her is just a freakin BLAST. We always get so hype with each other, even over each other’s fandoms that we aren’t even in!!! Something about the energy in her pulls out the energy in me and we just get GOING lmao. She is so very talented and amazing and a fascinating person all around! I’m so glad we got to hang a bit at KatsuCon in 2017 but I hope we can do that again in the future! I miss her all the time!

- @weirdfairytales is the MAN. THE MYTH. THE LEGEND. Anna is just the biggest definition of a meme I can think of and I LOVE her for it. I’m so glad that we met way back when MikaYuuHell Skype existed and that she thought of the masterpiece that is Cherry Boy one wild night. I’m so glad we continued to be great friends and talk about so many things. I love when our messages get super long cause we just have so many things to say XD Cosplaying Victuuri with her at Katsu was so lit, and I can’t express how much I love her Victuuri fic too!!!

- @hannaadi88 is such. a. sweetheart. I can’t say it enough. Hanna does so much and gets so little I stfg yall need to APPRECIATE HER MORE. Her writing is STUNNING and the projects she makes for this fandom are just outstanding!!! From gift exchanges (I SAID ONS REMIX BEFORE IM SORRY i was wrong XD) to 365 Days of Mika and Yuu, she has put in so much for us constantly! She has also granted us with the lovely fic Scented, and not to mention one of my favorite fics of ALL TIME, Eye of Horus- the Ancient Egypt take on Unwritten!!! And she named it that without knowing my first tattoo is literally the eye of horus! XD I was shook lmfao and I still am. Meeting Hanna was amazing and the day I spent with her and @ihavetobenkyou (who is also a-freaking-MAZING and a big bundle of goodness!!!!!!) is one I’ll never forget. She’s so chill and just gives off this ‘wise’ aura idk why but I just look up to Hanna so much. No matter what she writes I will always support her and you all should too!!!

- @just-another-dream-about-yuu is ONE OF MY FAVORITE HUMANS TO EVER HUMAN. Julia omfg I cannot express how much I love you. TwT Julia is not only one of the most talented artists I have ever seen, but she is so sweet and fun and so full of energy and excitement!! She’s super busy with adulting so she’s not around in the fandom a whole lot but I always make sure to include her bc I won’t let her leave XD JULIA YOU CANNOT ESCAPE…. lmfao I will always drag you back… I won’t ever forget the day I got a twitter notification that someone drew me Unwritten fanart and the croaking sound I made was insane LMAO my friend who was with me was like WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED XD I was so excited!!! I still adore every piece of fanart she’s given me and I always will. Thank you, Julia, for bringing my imagination to life so many times, for showing me what you saw when you read my writing. It means more than I can say.

- @coleglend is the most underappreciated person in this fandom I swear. Or, who was in this fandom- Cole is off doing other things besides OnS, but regardless, she is so very amazing and beyond talented. I can’t even express how beautiful her art is and the emotions each piece sparks in me. Even her new Marvel artworks are just breathtaking and I truly admire them!!! I don’t know anyone who can make such detailed, visually engaging art- everything she creates belongs in a museum I swear. I want to print them and frame them for my walls!!! I look at her art all the time!!! Now that I’ve established how gorgeous her art is, talk about Cole as a person! She’s so sweet and kind and I love seeing her little posts on Instagram and such, even though I can’t understand most of them, I like seeing that she’s with friends and having a good time.

- @linnpuzzle is one of the coolest most amazing people in this fandom!!! Her art is STUNNING and as she knows, I will drop everything to commission her and buy her merch because I just am addicted to her gorgeous art!!! I am so honored to have some of her art as part of my collection of OnS things and I am forever going to treasure the commissions I’ve purchased from her!! Besides being a great artist, I love talking with Linn, too! I’m so glad we have things in common outside of MikaYuu, like Voltron and Kyo Kara Maoh :D Linn is truly too good for this world and she deserves everything okokok.

- @zilleniose-chu is truly an ICON of this fandom. We don’t talk alot outside of business stuff lolol but they are just freakin amazing!!! I adore their art so much- I always have, ever since I first saw their page!!- and I LOVE their AU’s and headcanons!! They are full of such great ideas and humor and they can share those ideas through really stunning and captivating artwork

- @absolute-exclusivity IS AN AMAZIN. ABSOLUTELY AMAZING BEAN OH MY GOODNESS i cANT TELL YOU ENOUGH HOW MUCH I LOVE LYSIA. AAAAAAAAHHHH THIS GIRL IS GONNA SPEND MY BIRTHDAY WITH ME OUT IN LONDON LESSGO GIRL!!! I’m so excited you have NO IDEA. Lysia is so so so energetic and cute and overall such an amazing friend!! She’s so caring and always willing to listen even when things are busy for her!! She’s full of hilarious, tragic, and heart-pounding ideas and AU’s. We always get lit together talking about fics and headcanons and I wouldn’t trade those moments for the world. I can’t wait to meet her and I can’t wait to collab with her and Zeta soon, too!!

- @rindartist is absolutely one of my favorite artists of ALL TIME no doubt about it. Rin is so amazing, always making so many beautiful artworks of MikaYuu, and now of other lovely series aswelll! I may not be into GBF but her art of it is just lovely and I suggest everyone to commission Rin if they have the means!!

- @p0isonpez is someone I’ve only seen from afar but I absolutely love her art and posts!! I am so happy to see someone new in the fandom sharing such lovely things and interacting with the rest of us!! you seem so friendly and kind and I hope we can talk more sometime! :D

- @temesasu is such a sweetheart!! We’re just starting to talk a little more, but I am soso happy!! They are such an amazing cosplayer and their ONS cosplayers bring such a big smile to my face. They are beautiful and able to make themselves look like so many different characters!!! They are so talented with makeup, I am in awe!! :D And they are so kind and fun to talk to, and I hope we talk more! Thank you for sharing your cosplays with us, you are amazing! Don’t stop!

- @seraph-star is such a good precious person who makes endless good content!! Omg, their edits are just so awesome!! they always have me bouncing my head along, or completely enraptured and breathless, or laughing!! They are so good at evoking different emotions through video editing and as a very casual video editor myself, I am so impressed with their work!! I also love their memes and art and everything else that they share!!!

- @angeru-artist is a precious PRECIOUS ANGEL who deserves the entire world!!!! Omg, Angeru makes such amazing art, with such expressive characters and cute little attributes!!! I love it when I see their art and I’m so glad that we share a few fandoms together rather than just one. Angeru is really bighearted and she goes through way too much hard times, and I wish I could just take her away to somewhere better!!! One day my friend we will forget about the world and just have fun!!

- @maqui-chan iS ONE OF THE BEST ARTISTS I’VE EVER KNOWN OMFG. her art is iconic and unforgettable!!!! Maqui’s art has always been one of my favorites of all time and I can’t even count the amount of times I’ve commissioned her LOL!! I JUST LOVE HER ART SO MUCH OKAY!?? ITS SO GOOD GO LOOK AT ALL OF HER GLORIOUS CREATIONS! she is so talented and she can create anything, from angst to smut to humor, leave it to Maqui to create amazing things!! And omg Maqui ignited the fire in all of our ShuuNaru hearts amiright!??? GOD her art inspired me so much to the point to where I wrote a ShuuNaru fic and it was so much fun!!! Maqui, thank you for drawing so many awesome things and creating so much for the fandom!! Even if you’ve mostly fallen out of it, your creations are always going to be treasured by me and many other people- you’ve impacted people way more than you know! Thank you for always making me laugh on twitter aswell XD you’re amazing and ily!!! 

OK OK I;M OUT OF STEAM I’VE BEEN TYPING THIS FOREVER OK i could go ON AND ON about even MORE people in this fandom but that would take me literal ages LMAO

TO EVERYONE ELSE, WHO I DIDN’T MENTION BC MY BRAIN IS JUMBLED AND I AM EXHAUSTED: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. DONT STOP CREATING. THE FANDOM IS A FLAMING GARBAGE HEAP SOMETIMES LIKE IT WAS TODAY. But DON’T LET THAT STOP YOU from having a good time, doing what you love, and creating things that you are proud to share!!! And if your heart leads you elsewhere, to a different brand new fandom, I hope you always remember the people you inspired with your work!! I hope you forget the bad memories and always treasure the good ones. I hope that we can be friends and/or that I can continue supporting you no matter where we all end up in the years to come. And if you decide to support me too, I give you my biggest, most heartfelt thanks.

No matter how ridiculous this fandom can get and how much stupid discourse can dampen the mood and disappoint me, I will never let it stop me from loving MikaYuu and OnS and what I do. I will never let it stop me from writing all that my crazy little heart wants. I will continue to write until my passion dies, and when that day comes I will probably cry as I say goodbye and resort to watching from the sidelines as everyone else carries on. I will never forget the fun I had here. These past 3 years have been so impactful already, and I know the future ones will continue to be- with the old friends, with the new friends, and with friends to be made!!

Let’s spread love more often rather than hate. I encourage anyone who feels inclined to make posts (maybe not as long as mine if you dont want XDD) talking about your favorite creators and friends in the fandom, too! Or, if that seems too corny to you, just continue to draw, write, edit, and cosplay! Continue to make people laugh and smile and cry and swoon! Continue to support creators by leaving comments and kudos, by liking and reblogging, by following and commissioning, and sharing and crediting their work wherever you can! Continue to make a difference!

I love you all so much!

[chaeunwoo-archive]

moonbin | astro

(done with @rockoaroundthechristmastree, @rockytheastroid​, @astrofireworks​, @jinwoosmile, @ongbins and @jakganim)

MASTERLIST LINK

1998 Jan 26

Cheongju son

Visual 4/6

How to recognise moonbean: smol upper lip, looks like a cat

JUST FUCKIN SHOOK US BY APPEARING WITH BLUE-GREY HAIR WHAT THE HECK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Baby: red, crescent moon

Was a child actor/model

liSTEN

BABY MOONBIN 

IS MY SHIT !!!!!!

Baby Binnie singing

GROWN UP BIN RECREATING IT

Baby Binnie doing the train song!!

GROWN UP BIN RECREATING THE TRAIN SONG

A full cutie / Baby Bin charming everyone  / Bin and Sua playing

Was also in a Samsung CF jesus christ what a cutie 

Appeared as Baby Yunho in DBSK’s Balloons

Bet you didn’t know he had a dance practice video too

I love embarrassing Bin videos I need a video of him reacting to this

More embarrassing videos he’s bringing sexy back y’all

Was also in Boys Over Flowers as baby F4

cute-ass nicknames

Resident “pupcat” for looking ‘chic’ when he’s straight faced and being energetic and happy and puppy-like when he smiles

문비글: moon beagle because he gets all excited i love him 

“YuNo Moonbin” because Baby Yunho in DBSK’s Balloons

“Jelly boy” because of his one line in Confession (“Hey baby 그 앨 잊어“ = “hey baby, forget about him”) that sounded like “hey baby 겔리줘” (hey baby, give me jelly)

콩 = bean

차은우 덕후 = Cha Eunwoo Maniac 

Listen he’s such a big Eunwoo stan 

#TeamSoap (Just so you know, arohas didn’t come up with the name ‘Binu’, they came up with it (”Team Soap”) themselves )

explained it by saying 빈 (Bin) + 우 (Woo) = 비누 (Soap)

Roommates

Picked each other in OK!Ready and have been living in the same room ever since

in the recent Night Night show they did Eunwoo said that if he could pick roommates again, he’d still pick Bin 

Used to call eunwoo (은우) “eu-noo” (으누) as a cute nickname 

“Eu-noo Eu-noo Cha-Eu-Noo!!”

Eunwoo saved Bin on his phone (predebut though, idk how accurate this is rn) as 달콩 (literally translates into moon bean) and fun fact coincidence or not you decide it’s also the second half of 알콩달콩 (lovey dovey) :’) 

Jokes aside he’s really Eunwoo’s best friend he’s Eunwoo’s hypeman 

Claims Eunwoo is the most beautiful creature on earth

“Is he really human? How can someone that looks like him exist?”

Eunwoo thinks Bin is the most handsome I love supportive friends ;u;

Bin to Sanha during the 600 day broadcast: did i say you can take the meat

Also Bin: feeds Eunwoo “be careful it’s hot”

문초딩: basically saying he has a mind of a nine year old i’m crying i bet he giggles at dick jokes 

쿨빈: “cool bin” i mean he’s cool sometimes i guess,,,,,, a nerd, 

Also recently pointed out during ASC as the sexiest member in astro so

빈스틸러: “bin stealer” - basically (sf9 taeyang voice) scene steAlerRr 

정수리감별사: he can distinguish people by smelling the top of their heads bless him 

Has a ridiculously refined sense of olfaction - can literally smell every member apart from one another 

Literally suffers every time he’s asked to do this by mcs; has done it on Weekly Idol and Immigration and the latest Special Sunday

문밥: mOON RICE THE CUTEST NICKNAME because he loves to eat bless his soul

loves babies to no end

But so does the whole of astro so

can run real fuckin fast

Got a silver medal in ISAC, got beat out by his buddy Woosung form Snuper only because Woosung’s chest touched the ribbon 0.02 seconds before bless

plays the piano!

Was close to ikon’s Chanwoo and sf9’s Chani and also childhood friends with gfriend’s SinB

THE CUTEST LISTEN he was Chani’s OG “Bin hyung” 

Once he met Moonbin in the airport and yelled, “BIN HYUNG!!” and Youngbin got so bitter that Chani called Moonbin “bin hyung” he went on sf9’s vlive a month afterwards to complain and said it was a stab to his heart asjdlhf I love them

Also friends with Seungkwan and Vernon from SVT :’)

LOVES EATING I LOVE THIS SO MUCH 

Joined the fantz and “Right since the start I told the company that I hope they don’t interfere when it comes to food.” this bitch im rly cryign ilove him

Steals MJ’s food, and also probably everyone else’s

Videos of him eating is my passion 

Apparently used to make pancakes really often predebut with Astro :’)

Claims to not really like bread but has an entire vlive of him eating bread with rocko

Apparently hates red bean, egg yolks and tofu and chocolate and fish 

Still tried to drink the chocolate drink jinjin(?) won from nimdle even though he hates chocolate what is this boy doing

Actually eats so much omg my fave Bin concept is Bin eating 

Literally gets fed by EVERYONE ALL THE TIME (peep nimdle broadcast and also his actual CEO getting their manager to buy him [and Eunwoo] food every 10 flippin minutes)

Gets a free pass to do anything anywhere on a vlive??? Gets meat to hold a BBQ party 

Holds his own muk-bang broadcasts, on days where he “can’t eat much” still eats for one meal 2 servings of kbbq, a bowl of rice, a large bowl of stew and finishes off with a large bowl of naengmyeon. son, 

sleeps a lot

Literally though sanha and jinjin posted a twitter video of them trying to wake bin up it doesn’t work it apparently only works when eunwoo gets him to wake up

Sleeps through sanha and jinjin prodding him but wakes up when eunwoo starts talking in a vlive

Bin said in the harper’s bazaar interview that he doesn’t wake up when the manager calls him to get up but his eyes naturally open when he hears Eunwoo sighing (creds to @astrotranslations)

Bin’s mom even sent in a concern to hello counsellor bc he wouldn’t stop sleeping and couldn’t wake up so really… eunwoo = magic?

Sister is YG trainee Moon Su-Ah

Not sure if she’s still in that disgusting man’s dungeon or if she’s switched companies, pls pray 4 her 

She’s a year younger than him and appeared on Unpretty Rapstar

Once Bin went on in the audience wow he was so handsome in that episode bless up

Cannot deal with doing aegyo for the life of him, but is actually super duper naturally adorable

KNOWS he’s cute, in his friggin line play profile he says he’s ASTRO’s cutie so there’s that

Tried to out-aegyo himself once what a fuckin cutie

Loves the dinosaur claw

Oddly talented at using the claw machine even though he said he was horrible but Hyuksoo called him out on it

Showed us a forehead Once during the Growl collab stage with KNK and Snuper (bless their souls pls support the Holy Trinity I’m not saying this collab stage turned me into a Moonbin/Sangil stan but it 100% did)

SWEATER PAWS

His dedication to the sweater paws is incredible 

Soft voice, cute voice, slightly grainy

It’s so distinctive you can tell it’s his voice during songs 

Says dumb things sometimes 

“MY NAME IS MOONBEAN”

“I ANOTHER GIRL LIKE”

”YOU GO HOME”

Once upon a time, a barista - he attempted to make a heart in a latte but made a carrot lookin thing instead (but he tried his darndest)

For context he worked in the fantagio cafe when he was a trainee to make pocket money and to get to interact with people 

Was then asked to make a latte heart but failed asjdhflaskj he’s so pure, Pls tell him it looks like a heart ;; all he wants is validation

Makes cute high pitched squealing noises when laughing/embarrassed

Apparently had Crazy Sexy Cool written for him as a solo track djfaslhdkjfahlsdkf a fullass blessing 

Mouth corners curve up up up and into his cheeks when he smiles his eyes disappear it’s the cutest thing my heart stops every single time 

Stops my heart when he’s not smiling too 

Would do anything to see him smile 

GRUMPY AS HECK WHEN HE WAKES UP 

Pouts immediately it’s so cute my heart is weak he’s exactly like a cat 

Trained the longest out of all of ASTRO, at least under Fantagio

Is called “ancient” in some DDOCA hashtags because he and rocko trained under fantagio for 7 years

Is the longest running member of the Fantagio fam, not counting the CEO

Apparently called Manager Moon what a pure bean 

Listen we were just talking about this the other day but in 40 years we’re going to wonder about what happened to astro then we’ll google fantagio and something will pop up and it’ll say something like “Moonbin, previously part of idol group Astro, now CEO of Fantagio”

Is a BTS stan smdh 

Knows the choreo to literally all of BTS’s songs, including I Need U and DNA smdh 

Introduced to Jungkook by Seungjun (now KNK, previously a Bighit trainee) 

Got a (literal) shout out too? At Gayo Daejun 

Made friends with him and exchanged contact info and has been messaging him :’)

A GOOD PHOTOGRAPHER

Took some predebut photos and also took pictures for the spring up and summer vibes PCs !!! 

Photographer name: 달콩작가 (moon bean photographer) :’)

[fluffyblue-multifandommess]

.

.

.

Horrible Psychiatrist also said i have dependent personality disorder which someone else had diagnosed. which i didn’t know. i don’t know who made this diagnosis, or when. they didn’t talk to me about it and they most certainly didn’t explain it to me. i don’t know about like Medical Ethics but it seems to me that when you make a diagnosis you tell the patient about it and you explain it to them. seems basic decency to me. having it just put into my file without my knowledge feels so... i don’t know it makes me feel off balance. also it’s a very. infanilising diagnosis and the Horrible Psychiatrist made a lot of comments that i’m “child-like” which made me SO uncomfortable. she talked about me like i have no self-determination. She ignored the few instances i brought up of Making My Own Decisions, and certainly didn’t ask me enough questions about my life to give me the chance to give her more examples. I also feel like that diagnosis is based heavily on ignoring the ways in which i depend on others specifically to help me cope with social anxiety. I mean. Maybe the fact that that’s the reaason doesn’t negate the diagnosis. I wouldn’t know. Since nobody explained the diagnosis to me properly. Horrible Psychiatrist... “explained” it in a very unpleasant tone that felt like she was reprimanding a child about how they really should be big enough to tie their own shoelaces by now.

also. honestly I’m. not able to think rationally about this diagnosis. somehow it feels like a moral failure on my part?? which is. fucking absurd. mental illnesses are not moral failures. but it still feels that way. the diagnosis still feels like an accusation of “you failed to grow up and it’s your fault”. and it’s all just. really upsetting.

i just. the more i look at the characteristics listed on wikipedia, the more i think either “uh, no” or “that one applies a little I guess” or “well sure but it’s just because i have anxiety” or more specifically “well sure but that’s because i have social anxiety”

in any case that made me cry a lot during the session with Horrible Psychiatrist because it really came out of nowhere for me, and it was just Another Thing on the large pile of Uncomfortable Shit that she had already thrown at my feet. it was very distressing to have this diagnosis thrown at me like that, and when i didn’t understand it to have her insist “that’s a diagnosis that has been made, it’s in your file”, like, I’m not fucking questioning that’s in your file, I just don’t understand what’s going on because it’s the first i’ve heard of it, i don’t know what this diagnosis means, i don’t know who made it and i don’t know why they didn’t fucking talk to me about it and i would really fucking appreciate for you to stop using that diagnosis as a reason to infantilise me and ALSO for you to show some fucking compassion when this whole thing is clearly upsetting me, and maybe for you to fucking give me a real and proper explanation of what the fuck this diagnosis means, without the Tone.

i thought i was done with this post but no wait okay see one of the symptoms of this is like difficulty to take on projects and. I have no memory of her fucking asking me about whether i’d ever undertaken any projects all on my own. When I mentioned certains Big Things I did I don’t remember her asking whether I decided to do these All By Myself Comme Une Grande or whether I needed someone else to suggest it first. She must have just assumed it was on other people’s suggestions. Because she did what so many other doctors do: she saw the diagnoses in my file and she heard everything I said through the uncritical lens of those diagnoses. I have to assume that she did not at all understand that when I said “I can’t travel alone”, I meant because when you’re travelling you have to interact with a fuckton of complete strangers, and what with the social anxiety (the one diagnosis she seemed happy to question) that’s kinda super duper unpleasant to deal with. (also unfamiliar places are scary because you don’t know the Rules and what if you do something wrong???) anyways im skimming the wikipedia article (really dont have the emotional energy to read more attentively rn) and it seems to be framing this disorder as causing anxiety and no question of whether it’s possible that maybe it’s the Having Anxiety that results in the symptoms of this disorder. but hey, what do i know, I’m just the patient to whom no one bothered to explain this shit properly.

[markyishanthonymartinez]

4/1/17

hi

this should be mostly on time.

happy april fool’s day.

wait wait wait 11:11 make a wish, but do i make a joke of a wish or a for realsies one? okay i made a for realsies one. 

i shaved today, but not like shaved my face off. just like facial hair maintenance. tbh i have been considering just shaving it all off. idk. should i go back to looking 12. or continue looking like a 12 y/o with a beard? hard decision fam. idk it’s mainly for the hoes ya’know, cause i think i’m cute no matter what.

i ate pizza twice today and i have no regrets.

today was super duper beautiful wonderful fantastic great out. like the weather was to die for. wait no. not to die for. to live for. what a funky saying. it wouldn't be worth dying for cause then i wouldn't get to appreciate it. i wanna be alive and stuff. 

oh also the final four was today. both games went the direction i didn't want them to go. well i guess gonzaga winning isn't bad, but i really wanted oregon to win it all. tbh sports have been horrible to me this past year. the patriots won the super bowl. clemson did beat bama which was good, but i wanted washington to pull that off. portugal somehow beat france in the euros. chile somehow beat argentina in the copa america. atletico lost to real madrid in the champion’s league final. oh also good one is the cavs won. but really now why do i keep watching sports if they make me sad. (jk i know why cause they make me way more happy and entertained than the amount they make me sad/upset)

um im trying to think of a deep thing to talk about today but nothing is quite coming to me. 

oh here’s a thing, maybe. idk i thought about it in bed this morning after i was mad that manchester united tied lmaoo. 

okay wait fun fact: when i first saw ‘lmao’ and i didn't know it was an acronym, i thought it was people trying to say lamo. like pronounced “lame-o”. like someone who is lame. 

okay duh back to thing i thought of. okay bear with me, but i feel like it’s really easy to fall in love. like in a very very very bare bones definition of it. but idk, if you lock me in a room with someone and let them talk to me about all the things they love and their goals and aspirations and what they want to name their kids in the future and how many siblings they have and their favorite christmas memory and this one time they got really embarrassed at school and that wild thing that happened last week and so on and so forth, i would probably walk out of the room being like wow they’re so great, heart them omg. and like to a certain extent, that is kinda what being in love is like. falling in love is easy. but staying in love and developing a relationship and having that healthy relationship that is equally beneficial and productive and progressing and all the good stuff about sharing your life with someone, that’s the hard part. that’s the needle in the haystack. love and the act of loving is such a consistent ongoing dynamic thing. you can't love someone a whole lot for a week and then just not for the next month. this isn't like a snake eating. idk. love is hard. love takes a lot of effort and work and determination and care, but opportunities to love are at every corner. also I'm not saying every couple will work out if both people work at it enough cause that’s way not true at all, if anything most couples won't work out, but that doesn't mean the loving didn't work out.

idk i kinda went in circles. 

i do that a lot.

i should engineer circles.

wut.

what am i saying rn.

alex has been asking about my blog the last few days and I'm kinda worried that once he finds it it’s just gonna open up the gates to the masses and this is gonna get way less intimate and personal. (intimate being with myself of course. and personal, once again with myself lol) but yeah, hopefully that doesn't happen cause then i’ll have to find a way to hide it or like change the url or like make it private or just like do these in word or something idk. i know these are completely public as it is, but if i actually knew a bunch of people had access to them i’d feel all sorts of uncomfortable. like if @notmarkyish was public, well i mean it was but that was cause i was more depressed than a raccoon trying to eat cotton candy (look it up). but yeah, v few people are allowed to stalk me to this extent.

do the funnest of things//stay cute qt

(funner and funnest are words in my book. yes i’m on that side of that debate, fuck off)

(fuck off is a term of endearment)

-mark 12thony martinez