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quillyfied · 4 years

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Mega Good Omens Fic Rec Post 5

What up, it’s back!

77 carefully-curated titles for your perusal today! As always, the fics are broken into the following categories: Jaunts through History/Canon, South Downs, Post-Apocalypse, Bus Ride/The Night Before/Heaven and Hell, AU/UA, Just Soft, Touch-Starved/Body Worship/Wings, Bonus, and H/C /Whump/BAMF. I don’t read smut fics but sometimes there are sexual elements to the stories and sometimes you get invested and then suddenly the author drops a smut chapter, so warnings where applicable.

Mega GOmens Fic Rec Post MASTER

LET ME KNOW IF A LINK IS BROKEN OR MISATTRIBUTED AND I WILL FIX IT RIGHT AWAY.

JAUNTS THROUGH HISTORY/CANON

1. Get Thee To A Nunnery – Owenjones (T, the one where Aziraphale is put in a nunnery and needs a bit of a rescue. More or less Ineffable Wives time, but warnings for Aziraphale being forced into a female corporation against his will, that’s pretty icky (three guesses for who the offending Archangel is). Crowley is posing as a little lady known as Julie D’Aubigny, which, if that rings no bells, you should Google her immediately and then go into this fic cackling like I did. Very sweet, a fun little adventure!)

2. Bibliophilia – @wingedspirit (G, the one where Aziraphale has a book nemesis and Crowley always seems to have the perfect book as a gift, what a coincidence. This is so funny, you guys, seriously. We stan ONE (1) oblivious angel in this house. And when Aziraphale finally catches on, it’s so cute, I can’t even. I cannot EVEN. Go read it right now immediately.)

3. The Heart Goes To Heaven, The Head Goes To Hell – Dekkles (T, the one where Crowley has intentions of making an angel Fall and it kinda…backfires. Guys fair warning, this one’s version of Hell is really gross, if you’re squeamish tread very carefully bc WOW it can get a bit graphic. Y’know what’s also gross? The PINING (obviously not gross in the same way but the pining is awfully feelsy and part of it does happen in Hell). Watching this Crawly go from an honestly nauseating portrayal of Hell to watching Aziraphale and kinda awkwardly twitching in his light is so delightful and I hope for more in the future (though maybe less visions of Hell, I will be so glad if and when the fic leaves that place because yikes).)

4. i like this place (it feels spooky) – @asideofourown (G, the one where Warlock manages to convince Nanny and Brother Francis to take him to a haunted house and it’s so cute. You guys. It’s SO cute. You really get a feel for little Warlock’s personality and how he sees things (and he sees ALL). Just a really cute “family” outing, really, and someone gets spooked at the end and it’s not who you think!)

5. Doubt the Stars are Fire – LilithReisender (T, the one where Aziraphale bails Crowley out of prison and they spend time together in an Italian villa. This one has cool history bits, really fun banter, and Crowley actively on the job while trying to pretend he isn’t on the job. It’s a delight, and it’s just getting started! Jump on this bandwagon, folks, it’s great!)

6. The Hellfire Club – @amarguerite (NR, the one where greater measures are taken to make sure Aziraphale isn’t promoted back upstairs. This one is so hilarious, you guys, I can’t even tell you which bit is my favorite. And the cherry on top? Wing grooming! (I can also tell you that something highly unpleasant happens to Sandalphon, if that sweetens the pot for anyone.) If you have a Thing for Crowley and Aziraphale being melodramatic and overacting, then stay put, friends. Also continue reading this list, there’s a few more that’ll catch your eye later on.)

7. The Immortal Look – MickyRC (G, the one where Crowley puts Aziraphale in some kohl and it’s awesome. A written entry for the Prince of Omens DTIYS, and even independent from Prince of Omens this fic is a winner, in my book. Crowley going dewy-eyed over Aziraphale’s looks in any capacity is always My Jam and this fic really goes for it.)

8. Merry & Bright – @peppervl (G, the one where Aziraphale and Crowley go undercover as a married couple in the Regency. You like fem!Aziraphale but don’t see it often enough? SIT DOWN, FRIENDO. Not only does this have a lovely Miss Fell for us to fawn over, but it’s a Miss Fell in possession of a fortune and surely in want of a husband, according to prim-and-proper London, and who better to help her out than one Mr. Crowley who happens to need some help on a temptation? Fun, romantic, and with a cute little twist at the end I shan’t spoil but you should really stick around for.)

9. Putting the Endearment in Dear – @joyandotherstories (G, the one where Aziraphale starts calling everyone “dear” just so he can also call Crowley by endearments. This one is sweet and a little sad and has the softest possible ending, y’all don’t even know. Read it, the point in time where Aziraphale doesn’t have to hold back his mountain of endearments anymore is a sight to behold.)

10. Between the Lines – cyankelpie (G, the one where Crowley and Aziraphale’s feelings are known but not spoken, at least not directly. This one is a historical jaunt where they have a lot of double-meaning conversations (and Crowley is very rightly lost through a lot of it, poor dear), and it aches, you guys, it just hurts. Not finished yet as of this review but WHEN IT’S DONE—I’m sure it’ll be worth it. Hot dang.)

11. No Matter How the Stars Align (They Make Me Think of You) – silentsonata (G, the one that covers stars that Crowley and Aziraphale have met under. Every once in a while there’ll come along a fic that shakes the ground as it walks. I understand the Big Bang events usually churn these out, and there are quite a few on this list, but this fic here? A masterpiece. Pitch-perfect in every way, just a stunner. I want to tell y’all to pay special attention to certain chapters but they all took my breath utterly away and it would be unfair to single any out over the rest, the whole work is a monument. Just beautiful.)

12. Too Wise to Woo Peaceably – purewanderlust (T, the one that’s five times they see “Much Ado About Nothing” throughout history. I love me some “Much Ado,” personally, and this fic knows what it’s on about. Wonderfully romantic and ends with the single most perfect conversation, I swear 2 someone. Hits right in the feels.)

13. Just Another Sword Fight – DemonicGeek (NR, the one that’s a 5+1 about Crowley swordfighting. If you’re here because Aziraphale taking on the role of the swooning maiden to Crowley’s dashing hero makes you, in fact, be the one swooning, say hello to your new best friend. If you like to follow all that up with Aziraphale taking charge when needed, I might suggest building a home here, because ABSOLUTELY that’s what you’re getting.)

14. A Few More Rescues – @poetic----nonsense (T, the one with, predictably, a few more rescues. If the previous fic had you reeling and begging for more, welcome to the buffet, children. These are some really fun rescues by Crowley on behalf of Aziraphale, and they’re unconventional and historical AF (especially the bit with the dragon) (you bet your sweet keister there’s a bit with a dragon). This fic is so much fun and I thoroughly enjoyed reading it.)

15. Floriography – Frenchmeister (T, the one where Crowley doesn’t get flower language. The premise is, Crowley slept through a large chunk of the Victorian era, so he doesn’t know what Aziraphale keeps trying to say as they work at the Dowlings’ estate raising Warlock. He does know that the philodendron is a menace, no matter what it’s supposed to mean. Funny and nerve-wracking and so, so sweet.)

16. The Interplay of Illusion and Magic – SoulJelly (T, the one where Aziraphale tries to join a magicians’ society. This one has some delightful history and Aziraphale trying to perform sleight of hand magic to get in a secret magicians club and a surprising twist near the middle, all told; it’s a lot more exciting than I initially thought it was going to be (I was just expecting some fluff and that was not all I got; it’s always a good day when Crowley has to come to the rescue).)

SOUTH DOWNS

17. There goes the neighborhood – @bestoftheseekwill (G, the one where Crowley’s retirement peace is threatened by construction. If you’re here for Crowley wiles, anti-capitalism, and flashes of protective Aziraphale, get ready to take a load off because this is primo.)

18. Teatime Revelations – Cardinal_Daughter (T, the one where God invites Herself over for tea. This one is strained and it’s emotional and it’s all the softer for it. Aziraphale being quiet and protective while Crowley has a come-apart in the face of God is iconic, tbh; pretty sure this fic inspired a lot of my own portrayals of the GOmens God, looking back on it. A wonderful and light-hearted take.)

POST-APOCALYPSE

19. Lose a Kraken, Gain an Angel – MistressKat (T, the one where Hastur has an expected friendship. This fic has everything—Hastur being a sympathetic character, the Kraken, Crowley pining after Aziraphale, the Antichrist, and is hilarious from start to finish. A fun and tonally accurate diversion, please read.)

20. Something Old, Something New – shippityshipship (G, the series where Crowley and Aziraphale are involved in weddings. Short and hasn’t updated in a while but still excellent reading, I find; great characterization, some fun OCs, lovely atmosphere, oblivious pining while everyone else thinks they’re dating, it’s amazing.)

21. The difficulty with disposable demons – @areyougonnabe (T, the one where Eric the disposable demon shows up and it’s a madhouse in Crowley’s apartment. This is a really funny take on what happens to the disposable demons and why they are the way they are, and with the added bonus of driving Crowley up the wall and some mild miscommunications with Aziraphale that are all sorted out in the end.)

22. Care and Keeping – @arcafira (M, T, the series where Crowley is shedding and Aziraphale tries to help. Not rated M for anything violent or sexual, really more of a T than an M but there is a bath scene and a lot of self-loathing. There’s a lot of convincing Crowley to let Aziraphale care for him and a lot of working through Fall-related issues, but it leaves off in a wonderfully hopeful place.)

23. The Clockwork Days – redwinehouse (T, the one where the world’s ending again. There are many fics that have tackled possible sequels to Good Omens and this is one of the more tonally accurate ones, I feel; it’s very tongue-in-cheek and matter-of-fact, and the little twist at the end was a genuine surprise to me. Whack in plenty of mutual pining and a Bentley that has had it up to HERE with these idiots and you’ve got a recipe for a good little story.)

24. don’t leave me here alone – Elvendork (T, the one where Crowley asks for holy water again. This one is a tense argument, right up until it isn’t, and absolutely delectable, really. If you’re a fan of Aziraphale bringing up hellfire to go toe to toe with Crowley on the issue, BUCKLE UP BUTTERCUP, this one is dunking itself into Soft Town with that accelerant to really drive it home.)

25. The Next Time We Wed – seashadows (T, the one where a mix-up leads to marriage. If drunken mistakes and their aftermath is what you’re after, welcome to the party, folks, because this one’s a whopper. Can people pine while being married to each other? The answer is yes. Can it have a soft ending? Also yes. Can it include the mothers of such characters as Anathema and Newt being wonderful characters in their own right? The answer, incredibly, is yes.)

26. You Can’t Un-See A Dog – @holycatsandrabbits (T, the one where Crowley is summoned and there’s shenanigans afoot. I won’t talk too much about the plot of this one bc I don’t want to spoil it but suffice it to say that this one is hilarious and has some especially gratifying Ineffable Husband silent communication at play. If your entire reason for existence, like Crowley’s, is seeing Bastard!Aziraphale at work, then bunk down here, friendos, you’ve arrived.)

BUS RIDE/NIGHT BEFORE/HEAVEN AND HELL

27. Crowley, Big Bad Demon, Can Keep His Cool Around His Crush – @edennovik (T, the one where Crowley…well, see title, and then immediately disregard. Crowley cannot, in fact, keep his cool around his crush. Crowley is doing the opposite of keeping his cool around his crush. Crowley is a ball of anxiety and screaming pining gooey mess and Aziraphale might just like him anyway.)

AU/UA

28. If Not Now, When – @ineffablefool (T, the one where trans café worker Crowley strikes up a conversation with fat pretty Aziraphale. Listen. Y’all know ineffablefool. Y’all know he is a force that cannot be stopped or reckoned with, when it comes to Soft Fat-Postive Asexual Romance. So I do not say this lightly when I say that this is possibly his masterwork. There is a lot of good, good content in his catalogue but the emotional work put into this makes the whole thing stand straight up and resonate. It’s tender and respectful and handles conflicts of gender and sexuality with grace and gentleness and oh no I’m tearing up pls send help I’m DROWNING—).

29. Trip the Light – @summerofspock (M, the one where Aziraphale falls in love first. M for a sex scene near the end of the fic, second half of Chapter 17, so keep an eye out for that if you’re sensitive to it. Oh, y’all. This one goes through canon and a few scenes outside of it and the recontextualizing of those scenes as Aziraphale hopelessly in love and Crowley as oblivious is amazing. Even more amazing: once Crowley finally catches on and then it becomes Aziraphale once again in his role of holding back. Guys. Y’all. My DUDES. I am in the throes of agony. It’s so good.)

30. one love (only for you) – @weatheredlaw (M, the one that’s a vague Snow White AU. It’s truly unfair how poetic and romantic this one is, how lovely. It has fantasy elements and ridiculous vengeful brothers and soft, soft boys in love. A sweet little way to spend an afternoon, tbh.)

31. in the house we remain – @commodorecliche (M, the one where Crowley’s a ghost in the house Aziraphale has bought. M for masturbation, weird ghost sex, and a harrowing backstory for Crowley; if you’re squeamish about sexual things and not good at gauging how to skip them, or if you can’t stand abuse stories, I would pass this one up. Y’all. Y’ALL. So thoroughly upsetting, this one; the horror elements are real but so is the romance and it’s a beautiful balance of the two. What’s wild is how believable it is; it could easily have been a story about Aziraphale just becoming obsessed with and romanticizing a dead person who used to live in his house but it feels like an actual love story, with Crowley learning how to trust Aziraphale, as well, despite their planar incompatibility. The ending is so unbelievably sweet. And there’s art now! There wasn’t, when I first added it to the list! Huzzah!)

32. pop! goes my heart – @areyougonnabe (E, the one that’s a Music and Lyrics AU. E for a sex scene near the end of Chapter 6 that’s a bit difficult to skip, since there’s a couple of relevant paragraphs after it that set up the next chapter, but if you’re up for the challenge, godspeed. First things first: this fic has ORIGINAL MUSIC RECORDED BY THE AUTHOR AND IT’S AMAZING. Music and Lyrics is one of my personal favorite romcoms, and what’s been done with it is not only accurate to the actual music industry, but accurate to the characters, as well. It’s such a fun story, adapted well, and the writing style is just charming. Fantastic!)

33. For the First Time in Forever – @nicnacsnonsense (T, the one that’s a Frozen AU. I am excited for this one, y’all. The adaptation is already so much fun and it’s only going to get funner. Aziraphale as Elsa and Crowley in an Anna-adjacent role (but not actually bc no incest) is amazing, the Olaf stand-in outshines the original, and the emotional toll is already pretty high. Absolutely worth a read.)

34. Sailor’s Omens – NeverNooitNiet (G, the one where Crowley’s a pirate and Aziraphale is his prisoner. There’s a touch of historical homophobia but that doesn’t matter much out at sea, really. If the boys being clever and bickering and also one-upping beloved series antagonists is something you enjoy, welcome to the party, friends. It’s a good old-fashioned piracy romp that’s sure to satisfy.)

35. Pomegranate Seeds – @nicnacsnonsense (G, the one that’s a Persephone and Hades AU with Aziraphale as Hades and Crowley as Persephone. This one has a unique tone and is also romantic as all get-out; throw in genderfluid Crowley, love at first sight, and Aziraphale being a sweetie, it’s a story well worth its salt, imo.)

36. Laws of Gravity – @brightwanderer (T, the one where Aziraphale invents pining for Raphael. Listen. I think we all know at this point that brightwanderer, or Atalan on ao3, has earned her clout as a GOmens fanfic heavyweight. She didn’t NEED to write an awkward and earnest Raphael trying to go incognito as Crowley into the Garden of Eden. She didn’t NEED to write about how incredibly awkward Aziraphale is while heels over halo in love. She didn’t NEED to have an engaging plot and a wonderful twist on the Temptation of Eve and also the most awkward and obvious besotted angels in the universe. But she did. And we are blessed. So go partake.)

37. Incubus!Crowley – GenericUsername01 (G, T, the series where Crowley is a sex demon and we get to see what that means. This fic threads the very specific needle I personally enjoy where sex is an element of the story and has bearing on it, but the story doesn’t have any actual sex scenes in it. I love this writer’s style and where they take Crowley and Aziraphale’s relationship; I love the view of Hell in the first bit; I love all of it, really. A+++.)

38. Everyone But You – @summerofspock (M, the one where Crowley is hired to seduce an angel. M for some saucy makeouts and some post-coital afterglow but nothing explicit. If y’all like stories where a conman is hired to do a job and starts to have complicated feelings about it, especially if those feelings are falling in love with his mark, then here you go. It’s amazing as all heck and hilarious to boot; Crowley learning what falling in love is like is always a treat but omg. Poor Aziraphale. And the most DELIGHTFUL resolution, my goodness.)

39. In Mixed Company, or the Corporate Retreat of Heaven and Hell – @theoldaquarian (M, the one where Heaven and Hell have a joint corporate retreat every so often and Crowley and Aziraphale are doomed. M for some adult themes but nothing explicit. Y’all. TheOldAquarian must be stopped. They cannot continue to be so funny and engaging. They cannot continue to have the most corporate and hilariously mundane depiction of Heaven and Hell. They are a MENACE who, in the space of one fic, has packed all the pining of the ages in so tightly that when it finally bursts free, my shoulders physically relaxed and my spine uncoiled. This fic in particular is too much and too wonderful. I really must protest.)

40. Loosely Ballroom – marginalia_device, @mortifyingideal (T, the one where Aziraphale is a professional dancer and Crowley is a contestant on a show with him (for American viewers, think Dancing With the Stars). This fic is so good and so funny and so achingly in-character. I love Crowley as the washed-up old star trying to kick his career back up, I love Aziraphale as the put-upon dancer on his last legs, and I love that they’re both the victim of a studio gimmick and then decide that malicious compliance is their best bet. It’s still early in the fic (…at over 40k words wow it’s gonna be a monster and I’m ready), but it’s going to be so good already, I can just tell. There’s already some art for it floating around by naniiebimworks for the interested.)

JUST SOFT

41. Repeat the Sounding Joy – @allonsy-gabriel (G, the one where they decorate a Christmas tree. This is a short and sweet look at what the holidays are like for an angel and a demon post-apocalypse and it’s so adorable, you guys. Crowley having FEELINGS and Aziraphale being fussy about his decorating, it’s just a treat.)

42. The Nesting Habits of Angelus Principalum – @obaewankenope (NR, the one where Aziraphale nests and is gently protective. This fic is quiet and understated and so unbelievably romantic without being over the top about it; it’s a quiet coming together that creeps up on you, much like how the realization of Aziraphale’s nesting habits creeps up on Crowley. A lovely little thing.)

43. we’ll get there fast and then we’ll take it slow – @tonyhawksmovingcastle (E, the one where Crowley and Aziraphale wind up faking a relationship on a couple’s cruise. E for Chapter 7, which is completely skippable without ruining any plot. This one gets a double whammy for both engaging plot and wonderful OCs that add to rather than distract from the story. Fake dating is fun enough but when you’re fake dating and also being wingmanned by well-meaning possibly supernatural sapphics, while also having fun in the tropics, it’s a recipe for a good time all around (at least for the audience). So lovely and sweet and that moment when Crowley and Aziraphale finally get together is magic.)

44. Road Trip Games and Love – rgfalso (T, the one where Crowley and Aziraphale go on a road trip together. This one almost takes place in real time, and has the most intense and emotional back-and-forth while these poor saps try to work out the Thing between them without actually talking about it for as long as inhumanly possible. Of course there are lots of road trip games, and of course those road trip games are a vehicle of conveyance for what they’re actually trying to say, and cue all the misunderstandings in the world. It’s frustrating and cathartic and amazing and the end especially is so, so sweet.)

45. The Most Stylish Wedding of AZ Fell and AJ Crowley – @leapoffaith1489 (T, the one where Aziraphale is determined to discard tartan for the wedding. Y’all. Omg. If relatively low-stakes cute wedding shenanigans are your thing, welcome home. If Aziraphale being pleasantly surprised is your thing, welcome home. If Aziraphale working through minor insecurities is your thing, welcome, truly, home. Featuring a lovely cast of side characters and a soft-as-butter plot.)

46. The Newlywed Game (Not What You’d Think) – @heavenslittlehellion (NR, the one where a game of drunken truth-telling goes a little farther than anticipated. Hello, welcome to the emotional gut-punch fic, you’ve arrived. The only thing that saves this from dunking into the last category on this list with the other h/c and whump fics is how low-stakes it is and how soft it is when they get past the unpleasant bit. People who love theories on what the Fall felt like, welcome to the table.)

47. On the Road to Love – Mizmak (G, the one where Crowley enters a motor rally race with the Bentley, with Aziraphale as navigator. While there’s great fun in Crowley and Aziraphale needling each other, there’s greater joy in their friendship and tenderness towards the other (and asexual bed-sharing fans, rejoice). It’s a fun concept all around and definitely worth the read.)

48. Mr. Fell’s Bookshop ficlets – @holycatsandrabbits (G, T, the series where Mr. Fell has regular customers and they love the place as much as they love its weird and eldritch owner. For folks who love seeing the Ineffable Duo through others’ eyes, this is a fun series to scratch that particular itch, and has spawned a number of spin-off fics, unless I’m mistaken. It’s a relatively low-stakes series, for people wanting something like that these days, too.)

49. Quiet Reflection – @shinyopals (T, the one where they have to duck into a church to avoid demons. If the phrase “spicy Jesus crackers” holds any appeal whatsoever, go read this fic immediately. It’s heartfelt and hilarious and really that’s all you can ask for in a good fluff fic. Also Crowley being held. Really, that’s all any of us want from life.)

50. Deck the Halls – forthegreatergood (G, the one where mistletoe should really not be this hard to get a hold of. Y’all you simply MUST stick around for the hijinks in this one. They are manifold and hilarious. Does it end in makeouts? Possibly. You’ll just have to read it, won’t you?)

51. The Secret Dress – GlitterSkullFairy (G, the one where Crowley has a secret wedding dress. This one is very dramatic and sad…and then Aziraphale pops in. Like with all things concerning these two, it immediately takes a turn from there. If putting Crowley in pretty dresses is a thing you enjoy, have a seat and enjoy the show, it’s a softy.)

52. Well…That’s New – @almaasi (G, the one where Crowley doesn’t realize he’s in love. If oblivious Crowley is more to your taste, this is the one for you. Takes the concept “what if Crowley was in love but didn’t realize it” and runs with it for all it’s worth. Hilarious and sweet and wonderful.)

53. serpent, serpent-bearer – @elsajeni (G, the one that’s about horoscopes. I realize the Soft section of the rec list is for things that are Soft but hhnnngkk you guys. This one is so cute. My heart can’t take it. They’re so gosh darned precious, with their newspaper and their horoscopes and their welcome invasion of each other’s personal space.)

54. If Only You Were Mine – @somethingscarlet13 (G, the one where Crowley gets so drunk he can’t remember who Aziraphale’s husband is, just that he’s married. This is a little sugar shot for your day, folks—short, sweet, silly, and did I mention sweet? It is so worth having a giggle at drunk Crowley’s expense, please do read it.)

55. Cupboard Love – @copperplatebeech (T, the one where Crowley is a cranky snek. I would also highly recommend this for folks who enjoy Madam Tracy, especially Madam Tracy being utterly unaffected by being face-to-face with the supernatural and cooing over things like the wonderful lady she is. Fun and a little silly and a lot adorable.)

56. affirmation, appreciation – pearlwaldorf (G, the one where Aziraphale helps someone in need a little differently than expected. This one has Aziraphale taking on the persona of an interested male party looking to pick up the spirits of a woman on the tail end of a messy divorce and Crowley understanding but still getting a little jealous. It’s so sweet and so lovely, both what Aziraphale and Crowley do for this poor woman and how Aziraphale reassures Crowley afterwards. Top notch.)

57. Forget-Me-Not – @dietraumerei (T, the one where Crowley gets amnesia. Not as dramatic as others, he just loses 200 years and it’s temporary, but it’s ever so sweet, watching Crowley fall back in love with the modern world and be gobsmacked that he and Aziraphale are finally together. There’s a lot of reassurance and tender sweet nothings thrown about and I’m pretty sure I developed a heart condition just from reading this, it’s too good.)

58. They Shake The Mountains When They Dance – @copperbadge (T, the one where Crowley finds Aziraphale’s scar. Operating on the theory that Aziraphale was injured in the War in Heaven and that’s why he clutches his leg and limps when he’s discorporated, this is the sappiest, sweetest rumination on the subject I have ever read. Crowley gets so protective and defensive, and Aziraphale is so gentle in talking him down. On the whole, it’s just wonderful and so, so cute. Omg.)

59. Familiar Care – ginger_mosaic (G, the one where the Ineffable Dads have to take their snabies in for medical help. This comes from the Wiggleverse, which on the whole I cannot strongly recommend enough, but this fic in particular centers around the most delightful OC veterinarian who handles Crowley and Aziraphale’s strange family very well. There’s also a fun twist at the end, so absolutely keep reading to find out what that is. And also, immerse yourself in adorable snake baby shenanigans, because they are the best sort.)

TOUCH-STARVED/BODY WORSHIP/WINGS

60. Rituals (or the Seven Layer Bean Dip Approach to Sex) – SleepySelfLoathing (T, the one where no seriously metaphysical angel/demon sex is super weird. Fans of truly esoteric ethereal/occult mating rituals rejoice, for this is your new home. It’s abstract but no less beautiful for it, I think; the imagery and emotional accompaniment are all lovely, even if they don’t meet conventional human romance standards. You can really tell that it means a lot to Crowley and Aziraphale, the ways they show how much they love each other. A weird and delectable little dish, by all accounts.)

61. Under Pressure – @copperplatebeech (M, the one where Crowley steals kisses. M for sensuality and body worship but nothing too explicit; also could be construed as dubcon kissing, for those of you sensitive to that. Hhhgkk y’all. Crowley thinks he’s being sly getting away with smooching Aziraphale throughout history while they’re both drunk off their rockers but does not count on Aziraphale actually remembering, and then once the Apocalypse is done with and they’re On Their Own Side and Can Aknowledge These Things…well. They do. Crowley is a mess and Aziraphale is a mess and they love each other so much. The writing is so tender and I’m CRYING.)

62. London Calling – forthegreatergood (G, the one with slow-burn wing grooming. There’s so much crammed into this bad boy and it balances it admirably—Crowley’s relationship with Aziraphale, Crowley’s relationship with Hell, Crowley thinking about retirement, Crowley getting preemptively banned from a certain European country for being a pest outside of its consulate, Crowley losing his cool over getting to touch Aziraphale’s wings. Humor, aching tenderness, the kind of longing that feels like a high, quavering violin note, tension and release. A beautiful piece.)

63. Elmie’s Ineffable Fireplace Fics – @almaasi (G, M, M, the series that is completely unrelated except for the physical and also figurative appearances of warm fireplaces. M for sensuality but nothing explicit. The first two are mainly short fluff; the third is a long Regency-esque AU with some gender and sexuality shenanigans on top of Real Danger and Intrigue. True to the writer’s promise, all three fics are pretty comfortable and warm, even if the third has some action and tension. They’re absolutely lovely, imo.)

64. The Hands Applauded (And This Was No Sin) – @ticketybye (G, the one where Crowley as a preoccupation with Aziraphale’s hands. Deals with both touch-starvation and touch-aversity in the same fic and weirdly enough it works. The fic is heartbreaking but it has a good resolution and that’s important.)

65. Moult – @sameoldsorceress (T, the one where Aziraphale molts and Crowley doesn’t. This is typical wing-grooming fare…right up until it isn’t. I won’t spoil the twist but rest assured that there is absolutely a twist. Other than that, it’s supportive and sweet and lovely and lord knows we all could use some of that right now.)

66. never get to heaven on a night like this – RestlessWanderings (G, the series where the Ineffable Wives are touch-starved and pining. The only reason this fic goes here instead of in Jaunts Through History is because especially in Crowley’s side of the story, the touch starvation is so horrifically visceral I very nearly bought myself a weighted blanket out of sympathy stress. They are both so afraid and so desperate for a bit of connection, the pining is absolutely ridiculous. And it helps that there’s worldbuilding there that’s both thematically appropriate and interesting to read. Engendered by lesbianism and catholic guilt, I believe the author said, and in this case what a delicious combination with an absolutely amazing ending.)

67. Strength in Modesty – flandersmare (T, the one where Aziraphale has a secret wardrobe. Y’all. I have a special love-hate relationship with clothes and my body and this fic somehow felt very soothing on both of those fronts. Corsetry is front and center, and it’s all very well-researched and well-presented. The story is so quiet and understated and is really told through excellent sensory details. The ending about broke my heart for tenderness. It’s a double love letter to Aziraphale and to fashion throughout history and I love it.)

BONUS

68. Tales of the Them – @lyricwritesprose (G, the series where Crowley and Aziraphale are the Them’s godparents, too. This is such a fun series, with a lot of stories that are not just funny in bits, but also meaningful. For fans of the Them and people who like stories about children that aren’t dumbed-down or grimdark.)

69. Stans in High Places – @doomed-spectacles (G, the one where there’s someone in the Earth Observation department keeping an eye on Crowley and Aziraphale. Another take on the angel(s) in charge of Earth Observation, this time featuring a singular angel called Grigori, and boy is he a cutie. His friendship with fellow angel Pravuil is also blossoming and sweet throughout, and the amount of innocent cuteness throughout is just spectacular. What an adorable story.)

70. Anthony J Crowley, Retired Demon and AirBnB Superhost – @theoldaquarian (G, the one where Crowley turns his flat into an AirBnB. Told as if reading a comment section, it is hilarious and paints a horrid picture of what interacting with Crowley—and Aziraphale!—is like for normal humans. I can’t give you any more details than that, you are just going to have to read it and laugh your head off about it like I did.)

71. A Guide to Fame for the Enterprising Demon – @asideofourown (T, the one where Crowley writes a book and accidentally becomes a queer icon. This is…so funny. And so sweet. And like most fics where human bystanders try to piece together what’s happening and come away with completely wrong conclusions, it’s utterly charming. You almost start rooting for the internet conspiracy theorists trying to unearth what exactly Crowley is from his (presumably) evasive or strange answers to interview questions.)

72. Hell Of An Angel – WaitingToBeBroken (T, the one where everyone thinks Crowley is a mafia family. This one is funny in a dramatic irony way; the way that every narrator in this is CONVINCED that Crowley is A. a family of redheads that all look eerily similar, and B. extremely dangerous, is entertaining all on its own. It helps that the writing is smooth and the characters are all fairly engaging, too. A fun little diversion for your day.)

H/C /WHUMP/BAMF

73. the only one i want – @qorktrees (T, the one where Crowley needs some convincing. The hurt in this one is real, folks. But so is the comfort. At last steps are taken to assure Crowley of how much he is wanted, of how much his love is cherished and his touch desired. If you cry while reading this, congrats and welcome to the club, we are all miserable touch-starved fools here.)

74. Always One More Time – boughofawillowtree (T, the one where Aziraphale has remaining psychological scars from Heaven. This one is tough, y’all, real tough. Aziraphale has a couple of abusive flashbacks and intrusive thoughts and his anxiety flaring up is a constant, so people sensitive to that should take heed. That said, this is a very healing fic, with a lot of underlying hurt that floats to the surface. But throughout Crowley does his best to be patient and understanding and even with a disagreement, it remains gentle and loving throughout.)

75. Smote and smitten – @nohaijiachi (G, the one where Aziraphale is a badass and we are ALL here for it. Screaming Hastur, briefly-sentient flaming swords, Aziraphale being amazing, and starry-eyed Crowley are all the ingredients chosen to make a wonderful little fic, and we are all grateful for it. What a guy, that Aziraphale.)

76. Nearly Romeo and Juliet – bisexual_dumbass (T, the one where Crowley’s hiding his panic attacks. This one hurts, friends. This one has miscommunications and fear and boundary communication, all while being so tense even the gentlest touch will snap something. It’s got learning to take care of yourself and value yourself and live FOR yourself. It is very important and I hope a lot of you read it because gosh dang.)

77. Pigeon Girlfriends With A Long Preamble – SleepySelfLoathing (T, the one that’s exactly what it says on the tin. This fic has it all: humor! Torture! Terrible humans! Wrathful Aziraphale! Pain and suffering! Tenderness and care! Pigeon girlfriends! The Hurt and the Comfort are present in about equal measure, but fair warning that what Crowley is made to do just before his rescue is more than a little disturbing, both to readers and especially to Crowley.)

#good omens #good omens fic recs #mega gomens fic rec list #mega fic rec list #whoof #probably take a break for a bit #then start work on six and seven's reviews #and maybe start on compiling eight #why do y'all write so much fic #why is it all so good

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flipflap-flipflap · 3 years

Text

[Alright take-two on this damn post. First one got eaten by post editor right as I was ready to post. You see how long this is? Save to drafts, kids.]

I’m here to shove a manga on you: Ookami Shounen Wa Kyou Mo Uso O Kasaneru (The Boy Who Cried Wolf Also Told a Lie Today). It’s a gender bending romance. Despite how awful that probably sounds, it’s actually really fucking good and I do not say that lightly.

(No spoilers, this is all in the first chapter) A high school boy insecure about his intimidating face, Itsuki, has fallen for a shy loner girl, Tokujira, who does not seem specifically phased by his naturally scary face. So he takes a risk and confesses, but she turns him down brutally. Itsuki goes to his sister to lament his insecurities about his face, which he (more or less correctly) attributes as why he can’t make connections. To give him a new perspective on his appearance, his sister (trans btw) gives him a makeover while he’s sleeping and then kicks him to the curb of her salon - fully crossdressed. On his way home, Itsuki (♀) ends up bumping into Tokujira, and she mistakes him for a boyish girl. Under this misunderstanding, she asks "her” for a favor...

She has androphobia, and she has it bad. So much so she can’t even look at men without snapping violently or becoming physically ill. And Itsuki (♀) is just boyish enough to trigger her, but not enough to lock her down. So she asks for “her” help, to see if she can desensitize herself to her phobia. Itsuki’s in a bind for a couple obvious reasons, not the least being the guilt of deceiving Tokujira. But nonetheless, he genuinely wants to help her. So, he decides to continue crossdressing, diving into a lie that he soon finds he has no easy exit from.

I really recommend this manga. I cannot say that enough times. It is phenomenal, shattering tropes left and right in fun and interesting ways. Do yourself a favor and give this manga a try.

Personal feelings and meta analysis below the cut. It’s, uh, ungodly long, and will get very spoilery. But I will flag spoilers. And there will be pretty pictures?

(Also, no, I did not go into this planning to compare a manga about crossdressing to the abolitionist writings of Frederick Douglass, but reality deserves to be a bit absurd sometimes.)

Before you think I’m getting spoilery, with the intro I gave or anything I don’t mark as spoilers, I’m really not. Everything outside of spoilers is right on the package at the start. It sounds like I’m spoiling late-game stuff, right? That’s something that was really fantastic to me: this manga doesn’t spoon feed you. There’s no arcs of pure silent angst, even at the lowest point in the story. These kids are smart, they think and intuit on the spot, and they share what they’re feeling with each other like good friends do. Like that next panel down there with Itsuki introspecting about his confidence level while crossdressing? That’s from the first chapter! These kids are smart. And god damn that is so nice to see.

There was a lot I liked about this manga, but at the top is how compelling the protagonist and his internal conflict are. Right from the first chapter he’s already wracked with guilt about what he’s about to do: deceive this girl by pretending to be a safe space. But Tokujira told Itsuki (♀) she hopes to one day be able to fall in love, and Itsuki wants to ensure she can have that - even if it’s not him that gets to confess to her. He’s fully aware of exactly how fucked up what he’s doing is, and is appropriately beating himself up over it in a really realistic way. But although the guilt never fades, it slowly gains company in happiness. He enjoys this new, fragile life he has constructed around the two precious new friends he's made as a girl.

It was probably easy to gloss over in the synopsis, but arguably the biggest part of Itsuki (♂)’s conflict is his complex about his face. He looks dangerous, and because of that he is afraid to even lift his head or smile in front of others. But as Itsuki (♀), he smiles and laughs without fear. It becomes immediately clear to him on the first day that he's a more confident person while crossdressing. Happier in a way he can't be as a man.

Botan is easily my favorite character in the series. She’s introduced early on, as Tokujira’s first and only friend before Itsuki (♀). At the start she’s a dangerous third wheel, a serious threat to Itsuki’s ability to keep up his lie. And though the situation is (thankfully) defused rather quickly, she becomes a massive source of internal conflict for Itsuki. Nonetheless, she becomes a dear friend for both Itsuki ♂ and ♀. She’s just so...*chef’s kiss*

^This face is the repository of all my love and affection.

Mark my words, this is the first and I assume last time I will ever say this: love triangle good. You know it’s inevitable in a romance genre piece, but this manga approaches the trope in a new and compelling way. [Spoiler] Needless to say, it’s between Itsuki, Tokujira, and Botan. But...there’s two Itsukis involved, ♂ and ♀, and in the center of it all is this lie. His lie stops being about him: it's about not hurting these two girls he cares so much about. [/Spoiler]

On a more personal note, I saw so much of myself in Itsuki’s older sister, Ibuki. She runs a salon, catering especially to crossdressers and transwomen. She’s a self-described “Youthling”, an alien from the planet Youth, obsessed with observing the exciting and turbulent lives of the youths of earth. For more or less for the same reasons most of us do: transpeople don’t tend to get the youths we want, if we allow ourselves to experience youth at all. So it’s nice to be able to enjoy it vicariously, through this younger generation that is able to more fearlessly pursue the lives we couldn't.

^Incidentally, one of my favorite interactions in the manga.

Despite getting Itsuki into this crossdressing mess, she’s someone he can always return to and confide in, and get good, helpful advice from. Her whole philosophy is to give young people agency to explore their identities and find themselves, and though she tells Itsuki the road he's taking is dangerous as soon as she learns what he's doing, she'll always support him however she can.

That, I feel, is what separates her from other, more creepy/pedophilic enabler types, like Sawako from K-On! or Lucoa from Dragon Maid. It’s a refreshingly honest and respectful portrayal of a quirky adult just trying to be a good older sister.

The last thing I want to say, and I’m not going to even mark this as a spoiler because of course it’s going to happen and if you can’t predict that then you’re not my problem, is that Itsuki of course eventually has to drop his lie. All I’ll say about it is that it is probably going to live in my head for years. Everything about it, the lead up, the execution, the fallout, and the recovery, are all so masterfully crafted for maximum emotional impact.

That’s all I want to say exclusively about my personal feelings. On to analysis. There will be a lot more contextual spoilers here that, even without reading the parts I’ve specially blocked off will probably leak through. Read at your own risk, but I would recommend revisiting after you have finished the manga.

One thing I really want to talk about is language. That’s right, I’m going to compare a crossdressing manga to The Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass, the autobiography of a freed slave turned abolitionist. Douglass talks about a concept that has remained imprinted on my mind ever since I first read it: how and why slaves struggled to comprehend the concept of freedom. This wasn’t anything to do with fear or “racial inferiority” like pro-slavers would argue, but rather with a lack of vocabulary. They have all of these feelings and things they know to be true, but lack the words to make meaningful sense of them. For Douglass specifically, his life completely changed when he learned the word “abolition.” It was like a floodgate burst, as he was suddenly able to put meaning to feeling, create context from chaos.

And that’s right, we see that happen in a big way, with Tokujira. This should be an obvious development, but as it happens late in the manga I will mark it [Spoiler]. As Tokujira and Itsuki (♀) practice things like talking, eye contact, holding hands, etc., Tokujira naturally starts to fall for Itsuki (♀). But she doesn’t understand that. An important part of her character is that, growing up, she focused on expanding her vocabulary as much as humanly possible in the hopes of being able to better articulate herself. So words are very important to her. It’s not until she sees a work of lesbian fiction on display that she finally realizes that’s the word she’s looking for. The floodgate bursts, and all of her emotions suddenly make sense. She realizes she loves Itsuki (♀). [/Spoiler]

And I think that is a vital and underexplored concept when discussing LGBT youth, especially in countries where even knowledge of these concepts is taboo. The reason so many LGBT youth struggle with their identities, especially trans youth, is because we do not have the vocabulary to conceptualize our feelings. I am always excited to see this concept play out, especially in this context. It’s such an important thing that needs to be addressed more broadly.

Moving on, I want to talk about historical context of the genre as it relates to what the author did here. Notably, I want to talk about a specific trope rampant in Japanese queer fiction, specifically early lesbian fiction: the idea that queerdom is a meaningless, youthful phase that children will naturally and inevitably grow out of. It’s problematic for obvious reasons.

[HELLA HELLA SPOILERS] My kneejerk reaction to the ending of this manga was that the author fell into this trope. In the end, Itsuki comes to the conclusion that he does not need to crossdress. So again, kneejerk. But...it really wasn’t like that. He never had any dysphoria; crossdressing was always just a necessity of his circumstance. Nonetheless he learned to analyze and value his experience crossdressing as a woman, and because of that grew as a man. And as part of his journey to understand his identity we, through him, see why some people crossdress. Along with his example, we see why his sister, a bona fide post-op transsexual, has made it a permanent change to her life. Likewise, we see Miyama, who crossdresses purely for the gender euphoria, but has no (stated) interest in going all the way. These are all presented as valid and meaningful. [/Spoiler]

Crossdressing, and gender nonconformity in general, is portrayed not as some one-dimensional fetish like cultural taboo would depict it to be, but rather a meaningful exercise for exploring and critically analyzing your own identity. For some, yes, it’s a phase, but an importantly transformative one when done right. While for others, it is a gateway to a new way of experiencing and enjoying life. Or, it’s fun just for the pragmatic reasons...

I honestly cannot recommend this manga enough. Tragically, I cannot imagine it ever getting an official english translation, so you’ll have to settle for a scanlation like the one I linked in the title up top (and here, again). It’s a really good translation, though the site is predictably sketchy. Warning for lots of NSFW ads.

Read it, and then come talk to me about it!!! There is basically zero fan community and I need to fangirl with someone!

#long post #and I mean REALLY long post #Ookami Shounen Wa Kyou Mo Uso O Kasaneru #The Boy Who Cried Wolf Also Told a Lie Today #the boy who cried wolf tells a lie today also #analysis

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fullsunalicia · 4 years

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Can I request about she being brazilian instead?..

sure bubs! thank you for your requests <3 i hope you guys don’t mind that i combined those, since they’re pretty similar! if not, please let me know and i’ll fix it!

Moon Taeil

wants to know EVERYTHING. every single memory you connect with home, your favorite place in your hometown, where you went to school, just wants you to spill!!! brazil is such a beautiful country, and he wants to know all about it!

definitely wants you to teach him some portuguese. i think everyone in nct would learn atleast a few words, because they love learning new stuff, especially something that connects them to you!

plus, it’s so endearing to listen to taeil try to pronounce difficult words :( PLS he’s so cute

Seo Youngho

a m a z e d. brazilian and korean??? huh?? how cool is that!! you need to spill every detail of your parents’ love story. mr johnny would like you to spill the tea, ma’am. definitely bawls atleast once (1) because that shit is so cute.

just like everyone, he’d be so curious about your home and your native tongue, and he demands to have you speak to him in portuguese. can’t understand for shit tho

learns atleast a little to impress your parents the next time they meet!!

Lee Taeyong

flustered. that’s such a cool heritage to have and he honestly can’t decide if he’s envious or proud to have such a stunning girlfriend ?? like ?? wow. lee taeyong must be the luckiest man alive!

different from johnny, ty gets the gossip straight from the source! he bores you to death by forcing you sit down with him and your mom and listening to her for houuuurs about how it all happened

he just wants to treasure you and your values and get to know your culture !! (since he’s planning to wife you up teehee)

Nakamoto Yuta

happy yuta is happy !! as a part of nct’s foreign line, he’s honestly going to be giddy ALWAYS when he gets to meet someone else who isn’t from korea, or not entirely. and if it’s his girlfriend?? even better!

i feel like even though he’s been in korea for so long, he still gets homesick pretty badly. maybe it’s not as frequent anymore, but when it does, yuta feels really down. so to have you share that sentiment with him, it feels like such a relief! you guys carry the same burden

whenever that happens, you plan a big movie marathon with japanese and brazilian movies and spend hours on end cuddling and translating for the other !! he loves you. yuta wants you to know you’re not alone.

Kim Doyoung

this man is so smart he’s going to know some basic portuguese by the end of the week. if you told him about your heritage on monday, doyoung’s gonna walk into the kitchen sunday morning with a “bom dia. tudo bem?” like - what ????

he’s not very fazed by it, since he fell in love with you just the way you are. that doesn’t depend on what nationality you are. still, he makes himself a note to celebrate your culture with you and make the effort to bond with your parents about it, aswell!

first one to sit down in your momma’s kitchen and taste some brazilian dishes. ngl

Jung Jaehyun

is in awe! he loves the fact that your parents’ love transcends countries, no matter if you live in korea or brazil. it’s honestly very romantic to him and he wishes for your relationship to be like that, aswell. soft boy jaehyun :(

wants to try all of your favorite dishes and wants to travel to your hometown and learn all the places by heart where you hang out and get streetfood and everything else !!!!!! he loves you so much and this is just another part of his journey on getting to know you

you weep a little when he tells you “te amo” in front of your family home in brazil. god where can i find myself a jung jaehyun

Kim Jungwoo

sweet babyboy acts disappointed that you’ve just told him now, but he can’t contain his excitedness for long. how cool is that!!! his sweet baby is part brazilian !!!

BIG fan of listening to you speak in your native tongue with family members. when you first spend christmas in brazil with him and your relatives, he spent the entire evening playing with your fingers and making heart eyes at you while you speak in portuguese

it just sounds so dreamy ?? gosh your voice was given to you by an ANGEL. and for his s/o to speak in a foreign language so smoothly? wow....

Dong Sicheng

like any other member of nct’s foreign line, sicheng’s eyes will immediately light up when he first finds out about your roots. he feels so connected to you because of the fact that you must’ve gone through the same struggles, or atleast some of them!

to make you both feel home, he proposes the idea to have a dinner solely with chinese and brazilian dishes!! it’s so much fun that you spend hours prepping food and giggling around while smudging oil on the other’s cheek or pour some flour there.... until you cook to much and have enough to feed ot21

sicheng loves you no matter what your nationality is, but he’s so glad that you want to teach him all about your heritage and the family stories and everything beyond that. you’re his soulmate! knowing everything about you comes with that. i’m gonna cry i love sicheng

Mark Lee

honestly i could go in depth about how mark would be so shocked but why put it into words when there’s the perfect kaomoji to explain it. this is him, an accurate portrayal: （＊〇□〇）……！

another member of the foreign squad, mark loves exchanging memories of your hometowns and comparing experiences when being in another country! it’s different and the same at once, and it’s a very wholesome experience for both of you. you’re close already, but at the end of it it feels like you’ve seen an entirely different side of each other. a good one!

sweet babyboy learns all the portuguese pet names in the world to make you feel loved :(( he wants to give you a piece of home because to mark, you already are his home.

Lee Donghyuck

look me in the eyes and tell me donghyuck wouldn’t IMMEDIATELY beg you to teach him all the swear words that come to your mind right now. do it. change my mind

besides that, he loves listening to you tell stories about your upbringing with two parents that come from different countries. he cannot properly relate to it, but he’s still going to genuinely invest himself into it and laugh and empathize with you. haechan loves you so, so, so much, and your culture is a part of you. so he’s going to love that, aswell.

you will regret your decision to teach him said swear words the second your dad walks into the living room to the sound of donghyuck cussing out his mario kart character in portuguese. rip y/nhyuck,,,,, you will be dearly missed,,,,,,,,,,

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royallyprincesslilly · 4 years

Text

Title: Animal (14)

Chadwick Boseman X Original Female Character “Sianna”

Chapter Warning: Cursing, Angst, Plot, Plenty of Words, Slow Burn

Word Count: 4.9k

Note: I hope you guys enjoy this. By the way, Tumblr is on the BS and flagged every chapter because my old mood board had a portrayal of backshots. LMFAO!!!! So new mood board.

I censored my mood board, let’s see if it gets flagged. LOL

**Loosely edited/Proofread***

Thank you guys for reading!!! If you enjoyed this please LIKE, REBLOG, COMMENT. ❤️ ❤️

~~~~~~~~~~~~

-Chadwick-

“It’s not Netflix and Chill. It’s not Netflix and Chill. She is the mother of your children. Show her you’re not just another sex-craved black man. You have depth. You have substance and standards. You’re not easy.”

He sat in his car in the traffic on the freeway looking at himself as he recited his lecture. He’d said this or something similar to himself quite a few times and each time he’d ended up doing the opposite. The club, the picnic by the lake, it was endless, especially when he’d wanted more from the picnic date. His thoughts went back to the first night he ever met you and how things were so effortless. You made him laugh, made him think and lit a flame that had long been dormant, even Simone hadn’t lit that spark. When the sun rose and he saw you beside him he knew he wanted to see you again. Then Barbados happened and now thanks to Barbados the two of you were joined forever—through lives you’d created.

He’d thought a lot over the last near three weeks and had spoken to his brother Kevin about things and he was grateful he and Kevin were so close. He’d given him some great advice and important insight, insight he needed from someone who really knew him away from the grind of Hollywood. He knew what he wanted, he just had to figure out how what he wanted fit into what you wanted.

Honks brought him back to reality and the fact that traffic was finally moving. He maneuvered the rest of the drive in a little over fifteen minutes. When he pulled onto your street, he drove to the end of the cul-de-sac where your house sat. It was a quaint modernly built two-story home that seemed to suit you. He parked in the driveway behind your car and sat there for a few moments and tried to gain some perspective and control over her nervousness.

By the time he rang your bell, he’d sat in your driveway for over five minutes and he’d barely been able to calm himself down. This was out of character for him, he was normally so self-assured, so mellow. When you opened the door the scent of brown sugar, cinnamon and gardenia hit him first. Then his eyes took in how your stomach had popped out.

“Hi.”

He looked up to your face and took in your wide smile, a smile he couldn’t help but mirror.

“Hi.

“What in the world is all of that?” You nodded to his filled arms.

“Uh, some of this and that.”

“Come in. I’m not one hundred percent sure my neighbors aren’t gossips who love to spy.” He snorted and walked through the door inside. Without being told he began kicking off his shoes, then he turned to you. Your smile was wider.

“What?”

“Nothing, nothing.”

He looked down to his feet where your eyes were.

“I’m a black man and know the importance of taking shoes off when you go inside someone’s home.”

You nodded and held up your thumbs and looked to his hands.

“Want me to take anything?” He angled his side out to you, the side where he held a bouquet of flowers.

“Those.” You smiled and took the bouquet and smelled them.

“They’re beautiful. Thank you.”

“Of course.” The look you gave him was a concealed one. He bet with time and familiarity he would be able to decipher it, but right now it left him a little confused.

“Come, follow me to the kitchen.” You walked ahead and he trailed behind. His eyes roamed your figure, down the small of your back to the flare of your hips and down your legs. He was plenty acquainted with your curves without clothes, but in clothes, he liked even more.

When you got into the kitchen you placed the flowers on the counter and that was where he placed the items he carried. “Ready to tell me what all this is?”

“Well, every craving must be filled, so hot wings from this vegan southern place that is close to my house, they’re amazing. Ice-cream, a few different flavors, you looked like you could either be a vanilla, butterscotch, almond pistachio or cherry jubilee kind of woman so I brought them all. Also, no craving fulfillment is complete without those chocolate-covered strawberries. I called in a favor from someone I know over at Godiva and this is their largest order—seventy.”

Your eyes were as big as the full moon he knew was shining in the night sky.

“Oh, my goodness, Chad, you really didn’t have to do this.”

“Oh, I know, I wanted to. It can’t be easy carrying a baby, let alone two and I wanted to show you that I care.” You flared your nose and pinched your lips, smiled and in a matter of seconds. the smile faded and turned into a frown before tears rolled down your cheeks. Confusion rushed through him and he just stood there unsure what to do.

“Uh—I’m sorry, did I do something wrong? Say something—”

“No, no. I’m sorry. I just—I don’t know what this is.”

You walked away, ripped off a piece of paper towel and dabbed at your eyes and sniffled. He was afraid to move; he didn’t know if he would do something else that set you off.

“I’m sorry. Oh my god, how embarrassing. We’re going to blame it on hormones. According to my doctor, I’m filled with enough for three women.”

You took a deep breath and released it then looked at him with a smile on your face as if nothing had happened.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m sure. Thank you for all of this. It’s very—sweet of you.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Oh my god, Netflix is waiting.” You made a move to take some of what he brought but he stopped you.

“Just so you know, all of these are my favorites.” You brought the pints of ice cream to the freezer and put three in but held on to the pistachio almond.

“Seems like a good place to start.”

When the two of you got comfortable in the living room you scanned the TV for a movie while he opened the container of food.

“Sci-Fi good?”

“Oh, thank god, I thought you were going to put something on like The Notebook, or even The Best Man.”

You laughed, then narrowed your eyes at him.

“Look, just because I’m pregnant does not mean I want to watch some romantic tearjerker.”

“I see and I am relieved.”

You smiled at him and he skimmed your face. In the low lite and glow from the television, you looked good, happy.

“Speaking of pregnant, you look it.”

“Are you calling me fat?”

“God no. no, no, no. not fat. Just the last time I saw you, I could barely tell. Now, you have a full-on belly.”

“First of all, calm down. Second, yeah. I’m told I should expect to get bigger, carrying twins is no joke. My doctor says I’ll probably gain seventy pounds.”

“Wow, seventy? I take it you’re not very happy with that.”

You put a spoonful of ice cream in your mouth and shrugged. “I’ve put it into perspective, even come to terms with the fact that I’ll be in maternity wear in a week or two. It even got me thinking about incorporating a maternity line.”

He chuckled. Every day you were growing even more pregnant and you were planning ways to increase your workload. Your determination and ambition were very attractive to him. He liked to know there was someone else like him, someone else just as hungry for success.

“More work, not less I see.”

“I have three and a halfish, four months to get it all out of my system.”

The opening credits began and again silence fell between the two of you. He tried to focus on the movie and not you, but your movements always caught his eye. You ate the hot wings without a thought that he was beside you. After a few wings, you took a few spoonfuls of ice cream, then repeated the action. You looked perfectly content and he was happy for it. he was happy that things weren’t awkward between you especially given the state of things and all that had transpired between you. This was a great relief and it also assured him that his recent decision had the potential to work.

The movie was not corny or low budget it was actually a well-done piece of science fiction and he enjoyed it. when the closing credits rolled you were sitting with your legs crossed in the couch, your hands nestled underneath the swell of your belly and your back leaned back which sent your breasts hoisted into the air. Unintentionally his eyes locked onto those breasts. They were bigger than he remembered, and he could see several veins protruding from underneath your mocha skin. Slowly his tongue darted across his lips wetting them, he was suddenly thirstier than ever. When he looked to your face your eyes were on him. He’d been caught. His immediate response was to apologize and avert his eyes, but he didn’t, instead, he held your gaze.

“Sianna—”

You reached out and took his hand and placed it on your stomach. As soon as he touched you he felt the flutters of kicks underneath his hand. Slowly his eyes widened as he looked at you, then they dropped to your belly.

“Oh my god. Is that?” You nodded.

“They’ve been very active today,” you said.

He got closer; he’d never felt this before. With his friend when his wife was pregnant, he’d felt her stomach once or twice, but it wasn’t like this. This was completely different. He had no relation to her child, who was now his goddaughter. Right here, he had a relation, and he felt a connection. Slowly he slid off the couch and settled in front of you and placed his other hand to join the first and he just kept them there feeling not only the kicks but the energy of the babies—his babies. They felt strong. He felt their light and it was bright. They were meant for great things.

A smile spread across his face, then he looked to you.

“How does it feel?”

“At first it was strange, now—I’m starting to like it. sometimes I’ll forget what’s going on and then out of nowhere I get a kick and I’m right back to reality.”

He smiled even more; he could picture you getting lost with work until they kicked.

“Seems like they’re showing some personality already. They want to constantly be thought of.” You smiled at him and nodded.

“They kick more when you talk. They must like your voice.”

His smile was wide, toothy and completely genuine. Your smile faltered and a look of confusion washed over you. He wanted to know all your looks, wanted to know you so well that he was never confused again about how you felt, or what you were thinking.

“I’ve been thinking a lot,” he began.

“About what?”

“About um—about this, the babies, you—us.”

He felt like he’d never spoken to a woman in his life.

“It was a lot to think over, and a lot to process and I couldn’t really—I’m sorry it took so long.”

“Eh, it’s fine. You’re right it’s a lot. You needed the right amount of time. It’s not something to just jump into without knowing just what you’re jumping into.”

He rubbed your belly again and got lost there.

“I would like to be involved. I know neither of us planned this, and we probably would have not chosen to enter this like this. I know you wanted to be more established with your career and maybe married, and I would have liked to have dated you first, showed you who I am and why we’re perfect for each other and things like that but here we are. Backward and out of order don’t mean this is something unwelcomed. I’ve always wanted kids, and I want to be there for these babies in any capacity you’ll allow. I want to be there for you.”

You bit your bottom lip and stared at him contemplatively. This look he kind of recognized, he’d seen it before, but it didn’t mean he knew what it meant.

“You’re so quiet, I’m trying so hard to read you, but I can’t and it’s driving me crazy. What do you want?”

“You.”

His eyebrows shot up again. He hadn’t expected that.

“I mean you to be involved. They are yours Chad, I didn’t make them alone and I don’t want to take you away from them. I don’t want them to not grow up having a father in their life. It hit me today that they may very well come out looking like you and it would be so meaningful for them to know they look like their father.”

He nodded and smiled small. It was a thought he just thought of. He could have a son that looked like him, or a daughter with his nose, or eyes. It gave him a lite feeling. He looked back to you and decided he wanted his daughter to look like you.

“We have to approach this right. You’re this huge star and I don’t want them to become tabloid fodder.”

“I get that Sianna, I don’t want that either. I want to protect them from that, protect you.”

The two of you stared again and spoke nonverbally. He wasn’t sure how the two of you were going to do this, but he knew he wanted a lot more than just being in the babies’ lives.

“Sianna.”

Taking a chance, he slipped the hem of your shirt above your navel and exposed your belly. He slowly caressed your skin and gawked at your beauty. It was something else to see you uncovered and nude, but to see you like this knowing you were carrying his children made him want you more than he’d ever wanted anything. He lowered his lips to your burgeoning belly and kissed your bump once, twice and a third.

He softly placed his forehead onto your belly and closed his eyes and tried to connect with the two lives inside you. Your hand touched his jaw and tipped his face to meet yours. You bit your bottom lip, uncrossed your legs and slid off the edge of the couch and down onto his lap. Your belly was pressed to him, but his eyes were glued to yours. He brought his hand to your cheek and softly grazed your skin. You closed your eyes and nuzzled your cheek in his palm.

“Chad.” It was a whisper, but it made his entire being rumble. His other hand gripped your hip and squeezed. “Sianna, I want to be involved with them, but I want to be in your life too, not just theirs. I want you to be in my life, not just as my children’s mother, but—more.”

He heard your gulp, but you didn’t move. Your eyes looked unsure but your hand on his shoulder didn’t seem unsure. It moved higher to his neck and back to his jaw where you toyed with his beard.

“What do you want? Do you want me involved, like really involved?”

“Yes, Chad.”

“Do you only want me in their lives? Do you want me in yours?”

You bit your bottom lip and he couldn’t anymore. He had to touch them. He quickly closed the gap between you and pressed his lips to yours. Neither of you moved, you just stayed there with your lips touching, it was as if you both were feeling it out. Your lips were the first to move against his and he reciprocated and softly kissed you. It began slow and exploratory but transitioned easily until the passion he’d always felt for you took over. He moaned onto your lips and you echoed the same moan as you latched your fingers behind his neck holding his head in place as you took over the kiss.

You began rocking back and forth on his lap and he couldn’t help but grab your ass and squeeze. You bit his bottom lip and pulled back and groaned. “Fuck.”

He smiled and made a move to kiss you again, but you pressed the tips of your fingers to his lips, stopping him.

“Chad wait. Mmm.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Don’t you think this is too much?”

“Too much?”

“Yeah, the babies, and whatever is happening here between us. Don’t you think we should focus on one of those and make the babies a priority?”

“Why can’t we do both?”

“What if we rock the boat and fall out again and it jeopardizes your relationship with them or our ability to effectively co-parent.”

He was hopeful before but with every word you spoke, that hope slowly faltered.

“So—so you don’t want me?”

You didn’t look like you knew what you wanted. As soon as he recognized that disappointment filled him. Maybe it was too late. Maybe he’d blown it.

“Chad—I just—I want to do the best for the babies. I don’t want to ruin things anymore.”

“What if we don’t ruin anything Sianna? What if we finally give in to everything we’ve wanted since the day we met in Jamaica?”

“It was sex--,” you began before he cut you off.

“It was never about the sex and I’m convinced you know that by now. You have to.”

He cupped your cheeks and swiped his thumb across your bottom lip.

“I do want you Chad.” He smiled and pulled you closer.

“Then let me have you, Sianna. Haven’t we wasted enough time?”

“Sometimes we have to give up what we want to do what’s right—what’s best,” you theorized.

He studied your face trying to figure out if you really meant that.

“You don’t really mean that Sianna.”

You looked down and rested your forehead against his. Your eyes closed and a few seconds later he felt the kicks of the babies against him. Neither of you moved for several long moments. When the kicks died down and all was silent and still again you sighed out.

“I do mean it. You should go.”

It was like a kick in the balls and a punch to the gut all at once. You lifted yourself off him and walked across the room leaving him to sit there for a little longer. After letting the words sink in, he stood and looked to you. Your back was turned to him as you stared out the window before you walked out of the room toward the front door. When he joined you in the foyer you had the door open. He nodded and walked out onto your front steps and stopped.

“Sianna.” He turned to face you resolved in the conviction he felt for what he was about to say.

“It doesn’t matter what happens between us. Nothing could ever come between me being there for them one hundred percent. Nothing could jeopardize my relationship with those babies, nothing.”

Once the words were out, he walked away to his car and pulled out without looking back to you standing on the porch. He was filled with so many emotions he didn’t know which to focus on. One thing was paramount, he was going to be a father.

~~~~~~~~~~

***If you want to be tagged please SEND AN ASK SO IT WILL BE EASIER FOR ME TO KEEP TRACK OF. Thank you for reading!!! ❤️❤️

~~~~~~~~~~

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#animal fic #Chadwick Boseman #chadwick boseman fanfiction #chadwick boseman smut #chadwick boseman x reader #chadwick boseman x you #chadwick boseman x black reader #slow burn fanfic #angst fanfic #black fanfiction

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songbirdtana · 4 years

Text

I wrote a little bit (what I could muster up considering how emotional of a day it is) about what Naya has meant to me on Instagram and I’d like to share it here:

Today my heart is shattered & aching. Not just for the incredible role model that I have lost, but for the poor child that has lost his mother, the family that has to say goodbye to a part of their hearts & the friends who were already mourning this day & now it’s weighted by another.

I haven’t spoke about it in recent years but Glee -& especially Naya- meant everything to me during a time I felt like nothing. When I was 13 years old I was sad all the time & didn’t know who I really was. I knew I didn’t like boys (I’d get asked ‘so who do you fancy?’ & I’d just blindly point at the nearest guy who wasn’t a dick cause I just did Not care) but I knew I really admired & was Heart Eyes over girls - but I couldn’t really contextualise what that meant?

But then at the beginning of 2011 I found this show called ‘Glee’ &immediately I fell in love with this character called Santana Lopez - my whole world lit up after so much darkness. Naya helped me to find moments of light and happiness again. Then Santana’s story developed...she realised she was gay & in love with her best friend. I was IN LOVE with this relationship and I remember, I stopped. I really looked at this character & the beautiful portrayal by Naya Rivera & it was a big ‘duh you fool!’ moment. Cause now I finally had someone on television to put into context what I was feeling, what I wanted to feel with love, &Naya’s portrayal made it feel like the calmest realisation. Acceptance of myself came Immediately cause if this super pretty, cool, popular girl that I love can be gay? Then it can’t be so bad if I am too?

God truly did give me this show, this storyline & these beautifully portrayed characters to me at the pivotal moment I needed them most. I needed the comfort, this realisation and the feeling of acceptance. There’s so much more I could say about Santana, her relationship with Brittany, & Naya especially but I just can’t put into words everything they meant (and still mean) to me right now.

At the end of the day, I can honestly say that this show/storyline/character/actor changed the course of my whole life.

Naya Rivera, her stunning acting and stellar singing voice and kind soul will be etched into my heart forever because of everything she did for little high school me and just because she was a wonderful bright light of a human being to everyone she touched. She fought for serious and genuine lgbt representaion through her character on Glee, championed our community and should be remember as a staple in it for her true allyship and heartfelt portrayal. She was a fighter for equality, a kind-hearted soul, an extraordinary talent, a bright light and a hero of a mother. Never forget the name Naya Rivera💕💕💕

And my heart is with her family, friends and especially her son, Josey, today as they process the unthinkable❤️

Rest In Peace you beautiful beautiful soul, I will love and remember you forever💖

#personal #naya rivera #god i love her so much the world feels so much emptier now without her bright light

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heroquills-a · 5 years

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s1lentsnip3r replied to your post: hmmmmmmmmmm……….. i feel like doing a random mun...

bet

cracks knuckles.

@s1lentsnip3r @chaosmixed @metallumdash

words can’t describe how impressed i am by how much you bring your muses to life bwaze. i used to like, not really give a darn heck about metal sonic at all? but after that first thread we had where sonic and proxy got into a fight, i was immediately hooked. you just do such an incredible job at fleshing out characters that i otherwise wouldn’t have really thought much of before and you just have this unique and interesting spin on them that feels fresh. i love the way you play the chao and whisper’s wisps and atia is just a little gremlin but i love them so much, and i’ve literally never seen anyone play chaos before. you just have this way of utilizing that potential that your characters and concepts have and it’s just really awesome to watch. i love it. absolutely a stellar roleplayer. absolutely stellar mun!!

@skyfcx @masterprotector @cosmcther

ties you to a chair. listen here little mister. youre probably one of the OG ppl in this rpc that i’ve lowkey looked up to since first joining. you’ve already heard it plenty of times already but your writing is just ?? stellar ?? from the way you use colorful idioms, expressions, metaphors, to how you capture movement and action in such an engaging way. it’s always a treat to read. the way you portray your muses is just always spot on and i love how seamlessly you capture their mannerisms and speech patterns. your headcanons for tails and knuckles just make me so giddy they just feel so right for their characters, and as far as rosalina goes--- while i know next to nothing about the mario franchise or this character in particular i’m still intrigued enough to peek in on what she’s up to every now and then. over all, you’re a rad roleplayer and a fun person to chat with ooc !!

@chaosbcrne

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. i adore how you write shadow. i’m constantly blown away by how authentic he always feels and how realistic you write him while still remaining accurate and true to his character. like i legit cannot even think of any other place or media i’ve seen besides the games themselves (before sega started botching up his character anyway) where he’s portrayed as accurately as you write him. you manage to balance the serious, aloof, hostile side of him with his playful, competitive, smug side AND the inner naive, almost child like side almost perfectly. and then there’s more, because you add so much depth to him and realistically expand on so many unexplored facets of his character and his roots !! you can just tell this is a character who’s endured so many hardships and is still trying to recover and move on, and despite everything that’s hardened him into the person he is today he still has that innocent curiosity about the world and it makes me so emo every. single. time. you just put so much work into him and it shows, from your icons to your headcanon posts, to even the most minute detail. even when you host events you just go So Hard at it you’re literally out here setting the standard dude. and don’t even get me started on your writing style. i was hooked by the very first thread we did, i felt like i could never hold a candle to it honestly. just. the way you narrate shadow’s feelings and thoughts, how you capture his actions, his movement, his speech patterns, is just so good. and your vocabulary is so colorful and rich. just. hgnfhg its top tier content ALRIGHT you inspire me to push myself and to keep improving all the time and i have to say i couldn’t ask for a better writing partner. i love you so much eph 💕💕💕

@1110-01111011

hello yes trikey i love your omega so much. i’ve never really thought much of the death bot before but seeing all the headcanons and fleshing out you do for him just makes him so much more interesting and fascinating. down to the most intrinsic detail you put in for him it’s just really cool to see and adds so much to him that just !! i love it man. every time i think abt omega now my mind just automatically goes back to your portrayal because he is Just omega. i appreciate all the depth you add to him and his relationships to the rest of his team, it’s so pleasing to see and really helps solidify how strong team dark’s dynamic truly is..... not to mention your art is hecking gorgeous??? like damn dude, goals. anyway,, thank u for the blessed omega content. absolutely 10/10

@coolxnxblue @oforbis @hcrofraid @mastcrplanncr @powderbluestreaks

toxi i immediately fell in love with your sonic the first time we ever interacted. you just capture his sass so well, i just could not stop giggling that first night. he’s still my favorite sonic in this rpc, to be honest. and don’t even get me started on your other muses. it still baffles me how you manage to take on such a huge raster of characters yet manage to flesh them out all so well. every one of them feels so evenly developed and solid and just like bwaze you make me care about characters that i otherwise wouldn’t have before. i feel like i have a huge newfound appreciation for eggman bc of you and unsurprisingly he’s now my fave eggman on here hands down. and it goes without saying your writing is just, phenomenal. you capture dialogue so beautifully, the way you narrate on the feelings your characters are experiencing is engaging, to the point i’m lowkey intimidated by it sometimes LMAO. also your AUs are just rad as hell? and rlly interesting?? and your art style too ????? 10/10 roleplayer, i just think youre neat.

@antibadnik @godcontained

hey you? yes you. i love your muses so much. i especially love how you write amy, to be honest. she’s been my favorite character since forever and like?? you do just such a good job with her? i appreciate that you choose not to erase her intense affection for sonic, because more often than not i see people tone it way down to almost non-existent and it really is just such a big part of her character. i like the way you delve into that mindset of her’s, and expand on it and how it affects her. i also just. love your writing too. you just have this way of conveying feeling in your writing that’s always a punch to the gut you can feel it that hard. your headcanons for elise are really interesting too and definitely nothing i’ve actually seen before, what with how her powers work and how having to go emotionally dormant has effected her after all this time. also, i love ava. she is baby. it’s so cool getting to see a mute character!! all in all, its just good content man. god i love football.

@team-phantom @heartfelt-silver

pandaaaa i adore you !!! you were like my first friend in this heckin rpc. all of our dash shenanigans always have me wheezing and i just love your boys so much. i can certainly say without a shadow of a doubt that zero is one of my favorite takes on infinite. its hard to believe that he’s the same jackal who almost completely helped eggman take over the world--- he’s just come so far, he seamlessly fits into the rest of the cast. i adore how he works off of his team, and all their own unique little quirks that set them apart from each other. your headcanons and lore for your muse is just so sweet. and god i can’t get enough of your art?? your doodles always are a blessing to see ;-; i always appreciate you youre just such a sweet and kind mun, you’re so welcoming of ppl here and have this way of making ppl feel at home in this community. it absolutely wouldn’t be the same without you. keep it up <3

@lightdash @heartlop @enrichedheart

YOU. yes you. ame you’re so freakin’ cool and sweet. you’re always so nice and welcoming to people in the rpc it’s always a treat getting the chance to talk to you !! you’re another one of those peeps i look up to in this community TBH and youre muses are just portrayed and written so well!! i can just tell you’ve poured many years of thought, consideration, and work into your muses to the point that they’re just so finely tuned. i love the aesthetic you utilize for you blogs, from your icons to just the way you go about formatting your threads? and not to mention, your art style ??? is just so cute ??? ngl i lowkey wanna collab with you one of these days bc i just adore how you draw the sonic cast ;_; thank you for being a part of this rpc !! you’re wonderful !

@projectlightfox

moggg you’re so nice and chill to talk to. i love volt and harmony so much... they fit in really good with sonic world and mesh well with just about any characters i’ve seen them interact with so far--- even if its someone they don’t get along with. i’ve said it before but theyre just a really charming little duo and im always happy to see them on my dashboard. i love the overall aesthetic they got going, two travelers roaming the world from dimension to dimension. harmony is just a little bundle of precious fluffy joy and her interactions with sonic always make me cry. and volt--- he’s such a good dad !! he’s a really neat character and i’m certainly interested in learning more about the both of them. and as i said, you’re a rad person to talk to, i appreciate how welcoming and supportive you are of people. and your art style? absolutely adorable. thank you for being in this rpc ;-;

@dieviskais @solfading

king!! i’ve never seen anyone write the way you do, choosing to shift the view point onto the reader as if they themselves are the muse. it’s such a unique and interesting way to look into your muse’s mindsets and express how they are feeling and what they’re doing. your take on silver is very fresh compared to the way he’s typically written. i appreciate you don’t take the baby silver uwu route like don’t get me wrong he IS baby but he’s not a baby. you certainly have really neat headcanons surrounding his backstory and how he grew up, it’s nice to see the grim reality of his harsh bleak life being represented. it’s good !! your other muses are intriguing too and i’m eager to learn more about them. i love auburn?? he’s a really cool oc dude his aesthetic and powers are A+. and you know, i may be terrible at expressing it but you’re a delight to talk to!! never feel bad or discouraged for popping into my dms i honestly appreciate the company ;-; thank u for being u

@orbviously / @cubeviously

THESE TWO BOTS. i love them so much. literally every time i see orbot or cubot now in any context i just think back to your portrayal of them hebby, they’re just so dang spot on and good. i love how you go about interacting with people with these two tbh it never fails to make me giggle. i love your art style too it’s just pleasing to look at! you have so many creative AUs for these bots i’m honestly impressed by how much you manage to create with these guys man--- from their human/bot designs to their mobianbot designs theyre just so cool ?? even your other muses are always entertaining to watch regardless of what fandom theyre from youre just so fun to interact with. and just, you’re always a pleasure to talk to ooc, youre always putting a smile on my face! youre awesome hebby

@fishing-purple-cat

yes hi. sunny your take on big is so blessed. you’ve done so much justice for him. i’ve always really liked big tbh but i just love how much depth you put into his character, his backstory and his mannerisms. i love that you like,, actually give him a personality outside being a slow thinker. i can tell you’ve really developed your writing style with him, it speaks volumes about how much work you really put into writing him and it shows? heck, you even go the extra mile to draw your own icons and hang on i need a second to gush about your art because holy DAMN dude. your anatomy and painting abilities are nothing short of impressive--- especially your nack for painting backgrounds. i srsly gotta commission you at some point when i’m able to, heck. anyway, the rpc certainly wouldn’t be the same without you here

@lnfinitc

dude i love your take on infinite. he’s just about everything he should have been in forces, and even more. i love how malicious and intimidating you write him and your take on his speech patterns is just straight up eye-candy. i love your writing style, its so flavorful and rich--- your headcanons and lore on how infinite works is just astounding. and i like how you incorporate your drawings into your replies or threads too like even if its just icons your style is so heckin pretty ?? gosh dang. i’m definitely looking forward to interacting more in the future bc ur muse is just really fun and you seem like such a rad person !!

@pistolbitten

uhhh hello yes... while we haven’t interacted very much so far i JUST GOTTA SAY, i super enjoy your take on fang. from what i can tell he’s very well-rounded and fleshed out and a really interesting villain. i may or may not’ve been lowkey paying attention to that angel’s thesis thread you were doing w bwaze and aaron and i gotta say. holy damn. fang just done FUCKED UP. im certainly looking forward to him and shade interacting lmao. your writing style is so good too hh... just yeah i don’t have a whole lot to say if only because we haven’t interacted as much as i have with some of the other ppl on here BUT i certainly am looking forward to bc you seem cool. i’m loving what i’m seeing so far. have nack shoot sonic. DO IT.

@mobian-merc @funis-infinite

duuuudeeee. i’ll be honest i was super intimidated by you at first asdkjsah i don’t even know why i was ??? but like. you’re so hecking nice and fun to talk to ;_; scourge is an actual literal dipshit yet you manage to make him very likable and you have such a fun take on him. i’ve always been a little conflicted on the character tbh because of how popular he is and he seems like the type i’d like but i knew nothing about him and was kinda put off by the over hype sometimes, but honestly? your portrayal won me over. i love him now. he’s so stupid and hE’S GREAT. your infinite also seems so cool too i gotta hecking respond to that starter you made me when i get the chance, im looking forward to infinite & sonic just. talking and sassing eachother probably. i really like your writing style too!!! and your icons are absolutely gorgeous ok. alright, that is all.

@flyinginfreedom

uhhhhhhh hello i love your rouge so much ???? she’s literally so cool... you capture her aesthetic and over all mysterious yet cunning vibe perfectly and it’s just always a pleasure to see her on my dash. i loved her interactions with sonic during eph’s roadtrip event so much. your headcanons just feel so her and spot on, and you still manage to add so much depth and personality to her i just love it so much. i love your blog’s aesthetic down to the icons, and even the way you format your threads. over all just a stellar rouge blog and a really cool & chill mun!!

@rosehammcr @antihedgehog

hi rosie uhm i love your amy so much ok. she’s such a sweet heart, i love how you incorporate her tarot cards ?? it’s literally so cool... and the accuracy on those readings is shocking. she’s just such a sweet heart god i’m getting emo thinking abt her tbh like amy is !! one of my fave characters and !! you write her so well !! and your eggman too, god he’s incredible. i love how sinister yet goofy he can be he’s just a perfect combination of intimidating and silly. your takes on orbot and cubot also bring a smile to my face and i love how you incorporate them into your interactions!! you also just seem like a rlly rad person and i’d love to interact more !! yeah !

@a-wind-of-freedom

yuniiiiiiIII !! you’re such a sweet heart and your sonic is too. i’ve never seen someone play sonic the way you do before and it’s certainly interesting and unique !! you’ve got so many neat an thought out verses and AUs too, theyre all really intriguing ! our interactions with our sonics are always rlly blessed tbh starlight is just precious. i always appreciate getting to work with you as well for commission stuff, you’ve really been helping me out in that regard. plus you give me something artistic to work on and the chance to push my talents ! ;-; all in all you’re just a really sweet person and have a kind aura about you ! ;;

@champiionic

clears throat. hi yes you’ve been one of my fave sonics since day one. you’re just so creative with your muse its honestly impressive how many things you’ve able to come up with for sonic. from the portrayal you bring to the table down to your muse aesthetic its always just spot on you’ve got the blue speedster’s whole vibe down to a T. and your writing is just ? kisses my fingers. beautiful. your sonic is just so dang authentic, seeing him on my dash is always a pleasant sight. and i know this post is namely about sonic rpc muns & muses but i already love bubbles and blossom. i used to watch powerpuff girls when i was rlly little so its a real nostalgia trip to see them on my dashboard.

@hcpebloom @rcsebloom

bunny !! ur heckin sweet.. i love ur amy so much HSDFHDJ she’s just so soft. and unique too!! your headcanons for her are just so cute and make her stand out in her own way and i just appreciate that yo. and i admittedly don’t know a whole lot about cosmo since i havent really watched that far into sonic x but you’ve certainly got my attention with her. we just gotta interact more man ur muses are so precious !! ;_;

@fortruechaos

you !! your shadow is so good dude ! your portrayal of him is just so hecking accurate,, i highly appreciate how noble you write him to be. he’s serious, he’s prickly, but he’s got the world’s best interest at heart and it makes my heart do the fluttery thing. your writing is so good too gosh. no to mention youre just so hecking nice ??? youre just overall a rlly sweet mun & i appreciate your presence here in the rpc

@glittcrngcld @livelifc

hey fretcher ? ily. your muses are just so good from your canon characters to your ocs, i just love them sm?? and your ART? i swoon every time i see your doodles on my dash i’m still not over those doodles of lilly and azure ;-; not to mention your edits are scarily good like shit dude teach me your ways. your takes on your muses are awesome man i love ur sonic he’s such a MEME. and elise !!! she makes me so emo god. thank u for your blessed portrayals of these characters ! @elektrisch-felidae

YOU. precious is just, precious?? HAH. i love her, she’s so cool tbh. she’s so chill and laid back and seems like the kinda cool cat sonic can totally vibe with. you yourself are also rlly chill and fun to interact with--- even if we haven’t much so far. its no secret i just love sonic ocs so much and precious is just awesome. i love the idea of electricity powers. absolutely need to have sonic hang with her more ;;

@coldheartbeauty

SPEAKING of cool cats with cool powers, i love raven. her sass is just super entertaining to see on the dashboard tbh. i have to see her and sonic get into a sass off one of these days. her powers are also really cool too ? she reminds me of blaze in a sense, but just completely different in her own right. i also just hella love your art style its so cute, your doodles are always adorable to see!!

INHALES. ok. im done. if i missed anyone i am so sorry i ran out of steam. thank you all so much for making this rpc such an entertaining, dynamic, and creative place to be !!!

#🌀 — later guys! i’m outta here! ❪ ooc. ❫#i'm not tagging y'all down here LMAO it'll take me forever to #but yes #y'all are fuckin talented i have a whole lot of love for this rpc #lays down #okay im done #i'll be over in my sap corner if you need me

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rasoir-national · 4 years

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5 male characters I love

So I got tagged by @antirococoreaction to name 5 male characters I love, and as always I asked myself the immortal question : do I pick characters I love as characters, as in, characters I love for how interesting they are, or do I pick characters I love as people ? And for once, I decided to go with the narrowest of the two, the second one, for two reasons.

First, because there’s this latent belief in media that bad is more interesting than good, leading to the pernicious trope that characters who are “good people” are boring. That’s patently false : just as it’s difficult to be a good person, and I think we should highlight characters who demonstrate that.

Second, because there’s this tendency, in tumblr culture, from which I am not at all exempt, to avoid giving focus to masculinity in a positive manner, because mainstream media would do that already. But you could argue that mainstream media is much more focused on toxic masculinity and masculinity as a “default” than on exploring masculinity in its richness and uniqueness. So I want to do that too : to highlight characters whose masculinity is a inherent and essential part of who they are and why I love them. Let’s roll.

Dionysus/Umar from The Wicked+The Divine (Kieron Gillen & Jamie McKelvie)

He is such a good person. That’s what you think the first time you meet him, and that’s what you’ll continue to think, even as the comic goes on and adds nuance upon nuance on every character. The god of wine and parties reincarnated as a young man with rave/hivemind and ecstasy-like powers. And also a kind friend, a sensitive listener, someone who is keenly aware of the limits of what you can do for other people yet will give all he has so people can have at least that, be it one good night amidst sorrow and depression, or a shoulder to cry on. Dio is good to a fault, as in, his goodness is arguably his flaw. He gives himself so completely, to everyone, that it endangers his own sanity, and make other people’s selfishness and entitlement come out. He is a perfect illustration of why putting yourself first is not just a flaw when done in excess, it is at its core a survival skill : if you do not put barriers between you and the others, you will crumble. Dio is a study in true altruism that not many stories have the courage to make. He is also canonically asexual, and strongly implied to be biromantic, although that’s almost incidental in Wicdiv, in which almost every single character is lgbtqia+ and treated with respect. Seriously, read Wicdiv guys.

Kurama from Yu Yu Hakusho (Yoshihiro Togashi)

YYH is one of the most insidious yet brilliant deconstructions of the shoûnen tropes out there. While some of its material, while groundbreaking at the time (starting with a fleshed-out, sympathetic gay character coming with a critique of japanese homophobia), has aged with the strides made in matters of representation, its commentary on masculinity and especially how it’s usually handled in the typical shoûnen holds up extremely well in my opinion. And one of its centers is Kurama. Created to be a riff on the classic “bishounen” character (to the point that one of the running gags of the manga is Kurama getting increasingly annoyed with the attitude of female side characters around him), Kurama is my favourite kind of good person, the one who is deeply aware that he is capable of horrible things. He is the rare character who begins the story at the tail end of his redemption arc, having already decided to change ; his arc in the manga is about trying to figure out what that means. And the manga does not pull punches with him : he has to reckon with what he’s done, to try and navigate his new moral compass in a world that’s just waiting to use it against him. And it gets... cruel. Kurama is a perfect example of how quickly and often certain traits can toe the line between making you a terrible person or a good one. Everytime he fights, Kurama has to make the choice to do good, over and over. And it’s not easy. It’s not supposed to be easy. And if YYH has one message, it’s that everyone who tells you otherwise is lying.

Father Marcus Keane (Ben Daniels) from The Exorcist series

Memory functions best by association, so reading @antirococoreaction‘s list immediately got me thinking about The Exorcist and Father Marcus. Just like Cardinal Gutierrez, he is both a man of faith and a mlm. And while his orientation is not the focus of the show, it’s present, layered and realistic in all of it - credit to openly gay actor Ben Daniels who portrays him. It’s especially present in his relationship with the other lead, portrayed by Alfonso Herrera as a young, charismatic priest whom the Church sees as a political pawn, whom I could also have chosen for this list. Just like I could have chosen John Cho as the single foster father of adopted “problem” children who has to cope with the death of his wife. See, what’s extraordinary about The Exorcist series is exactly what I was talking about in the intro : whatever masculinity means, it doesn’t take it for granted. Which is why the second season manages to have three male leads that are all incredible characters, incredibly good people, while vastly different from one another. Marcus is probably the most “morally grey” of the three, but in what that term sholuld mean rather than what mainstream media tends to make of it. Marcus in an unquestionably good person in a world where doing good often means making excrutiating choices. Marcus is someone devastated by these choices, who has to try and find hope again, guided in part by the young Father Tomas. While Marcus roughly fits the “jadded brooding lead” archetype, but in every detail of his character and portrayal he is imbued by a depth that’s rare in the horror genre. I will never forgive Fox for cancelling this gem of a series right as both the plot and the main characters were coming at a turning point. My advice if you want to watch it : don’t read anything, just go in blind.

Jean-Baptiste Adamsberg from the Adamsberg novels (Fred Vargas)

Adamsberg is a cop. I know that’s a dealbreaker for some people, and I respect that. But his profession seems almost incidental to the character. Adamsberg shouldn’t be a cop, Adamsberg is that guy you see in the street who stops all of the sudden, fascinated by something, and it drives you crazy that you don’t see what. Adamsberg is a dreamer, he feels things rather that he knows them, and yet somehow is always right in the end. He’s like a magician. He’s not always kind. He can be violent. He’s not always clever. In fact, sometimes he acts downright stupid. Yet there is always this kindness, this intelligence around him, about the way people are and the way people should be. When I was a kid, the Adamsberg series was the first I read in which, hearing another man using a degrading language to talk about women, the main character immediately shut him down. As I grew up, I came to think of Adamsberg as the way women wished men were, though they weren’t. In reality, there is a lot in Adamsberg that’s exactly how men are, both good and bad. He’s a character who shouldn’t feel real yet does in the strange, poetic world created by Fred Vargas for what is one of the strangest crime series I’ve ever read. If the Doctor was the protagonist of a crime series, they would be Adamsberg. Growing up afab, Adamsberg was one of the few male protagonists I didn’t feel actively disrespected by as I was reading. The first four books of the series, The Chalk Circle Man, Seeking whom he may devour, Have mercy on us all and Wash this blood clean from my hand, are absolute classics I heartily recommend. It’s some of the smartest, weirdest crime novels out there.

Zeno Ligre from The Abyss (Marguerite Yourcenar)

I... God, what do you even say about what may well be your favourite character in all of literature, in what may well be your favourite book ? I fell in love in Zeno when I was fifteen, fell as hard as you could for someone who didn’t exist. Zeno starts the story as a young adult and ends it as an old man. You follow his entire life, from his childhood as the bastard child in a rich belgian family in the 16th Century, to becoming a respected yet feared and misunderstood alchemist, all through the turmoil of religious and political wars and plagues. Zeno is the best representation of what it was truly like to be a man ahead of his time in a time of intolerance and obscurantism. As an isolated high schooler who felt like I had nothing in common with my peers, you can imagine how I could relate. The Abyss is a strange, dense book which I probably read too soon, but which absolutely enthralled me to the point that I refused to even open another book weeks after finishing it because I simply couldn’t bear the thought not to be still reading The Abyss. It made History and Philosophy realer than any of my classes. And front and center of it is Zeno, Zeno you see grow and age, with whom you discover and fear, who utterly captures you with how grand a man can truly be, how extraordinary life itself, from beginning to end, is. Zeno is a man trying to shine a light on the world, trying to live by the precepts of philosophers, and once again is faced by what being a good man means, and whether it even matters to be one in a world such as the Middle Ages. I don’t know what to say except read it, and you’ll see why I’m at such a loss for words. Oh, and you might cry a lot. I know I did, not necessarily because it was sad, but simply because it was over, and I couldn’t read it for the first time again.

Here you have it. Wow, that was way too long.

And of course there’s almost no one left for me to tag, because we’re like 15 people talking in a circle.

#tag game

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murphystartedthefire · 5 years

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Conageddon: Luisa d’Oliveira’s Panel + associated stuff

So it’s just my luck that immediately after posting my Richard/Luisa recap, a whole bunch of the Conageddon panels including that one became available online! I definitely encourage people to check them out!

Unfortunately the people who taped them missed Luisa’s solo panel and Richard’s solo panel. So I will still recap those to the best of my ability like I was planning to.

PANEL

- As with all the panels, it was introduced with a fan video - it was this one that had an angsty/uplifting focus on Emori finding acceptance with spacekru. <3 Luisa said afterwards that she loves watching videos that fans cut together because it’s seeing her character's journey through their eyes.

- She talked about the backstories she’s come up with for Emori. She had different ideas and then the stuff with Baylis filled in some gaps but left a lot open. (Some of this came up at Unity Days also btw! I just don't think I wrote it up then because I didn’t have time. *hides*) She thinks the real Baylis was someone who collected outcast/mutated children and basically raised her, in an abusive and psychologically manipulative way. Her headcanon is that Otan was not her biological brother, but that she bonded with him during that time and they’d gotten out together.

- Going into season five, she said she had two ideas about what could happen with Emori in space -- she would either end up friends with everyone, or she'd not know how to deal with it and become more antagonistic. Which is basically what happened to John Murphy, so she was like “I nailed it” for both of them, hee.

- She has a project coming up but it’s on a new show/pilot and can’t say anything about it. [Note from Nicole: To be clear it might just be a minor role and not necessarily a big 100-affecting deal.]

- I asked her a question about her video game role in "Far Cry 5" -- she did the motion capture as well as voice acting for the game! So she talked about what that was like, wearing the suit with the beads and moving around a room reacting to people who weren’t there. The hardest part was knowing how much to act with her face, because on TV you would try to use subtle expressions, but the animation might not catch it and just look blank.

- In season 4 it was interesting having scenes with a lot of new characters and she’d think about what Murphy would have told her about them. A moment that didn't make it onscreen is when they're planning to go up in the rocket, John says something snarky and Bellamy gives him a "Shut up, Murphy" or something like that, and on one of the takes she just immediately GLARED at Bellamy like how dare you talk to him like that. *G*

- An audience member asked how she would want Emori to die. She says "happy", she would like an ending like Monty and Harper had, either that or in a "blaze of glory." Emori would not go down quietly.

- Moderator Jo followed this up with asking if she would lay down her life for John Murphy. Luisa says absolutely, he would for her and she would also, that's been established many times. Pointed to the scene in God Complex when she was trying to convince him not to fight for her. (She started cutely “reenacting” it like noooo save yourself and joked that was the original version before she helped them rewrite it.)

- Luisa’s Book Club recs: "The Brain That Changes Itself" by Norman Doidge and "Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl. She also loves Jane Austen and a book character she wishes she could transport into The 100 is Elizabeth Bennet.

- A character she would like to do more with is Indra. She never had any real female mentor relationships, at least before space.

- There were two really moving comments/questions in a row about her portrayal of Emori from people with diabilities, one said it was so important especially to see disabled love on TV, the other talking about the humanity and poise she gives her like few other disabled characters. She acknowledged she comes to it as someone who doesn’t have that experience in real life and wants to be respectful. She always just tried to ground it in something real and draw from the times she’s felt judged and isolated in her life, the feeling of walking into a room where everyone else is part of a family and she didn't belong there. :..( Authentic without it being the only thing that defines her.

- Toward the end she was trying out her English (Cockney) and Irish acccents. Not bad at them! She said she once talked to a drunk man in Ireland and he believed her fake accent, just thought she was from some other town. But she thinks it wouldn't have worked if he was sober. *g*

- Her favorite hot snack on set is pierogies. She was definitely also asked about her love of Italian food and what she likes to cook but I forgot! There was one audience guy who said he also has his friends over for dinner to watch the 100 and she was like “we were probably cooking at the same time.”

- Asked to describe Emori in season six with one emoji. She eventually went with “the one that's a straight line mouth and big eyes” -- which is actually the "Neutral Face". LOL clever.

- HI I GOT BACK UP ON THE MIC AND ASKED ABOUT THE "JOHN MURPHY I FELL IN LOVE WITH" SCENE and when (or if) Emori's feelings changed between that and the finale. Luisa says: Emori's feelings never changed, that wasn't the problem. To her that scene was about her trying to be logical and think with her head. When he was injured, her heart took over and everything else went out the window.

- What Emori now (or at the end of S5) would tell herself in her first episode: "There are people worth trusting even if they don't seem that way at first."

- Luisa’s advice to her own younger self (I’m pulling this from a livetweet): Don’t be so afraid of taking chances, saying or doing the wrong thing. Just keep paying attention and keep your mind open. Be kind. Be confident. You're good.

OTHER LUISA STUFF

- While her VIP and panel were criminally under-attended compared to some of the guests, I was really happy to see a ton of people did visit her in the autograph room and she had a good line throughout. She even got an Emori Pop! from the same person who’d made mine.

- I should also mention that when I interrupted her and Richard’s beer pong tournament in my party dress Friday night, she immediately recognized me as the one who always dresses at Emori and told Richard that was me. *blush* So I decided to go to her auto table on the day when I was in the outfit and my friend captured a shot of her hugging me.

- Whew, the other big thing was that I gave both her and Richard the mixtapes I made for their characters. Hers is basically the same as the one I posted for Emori Appreciation Week... She seemed genuinely touched and happy and was like “I’ll probably put these into my workbook” and I was like ohhh no haha I hope you just like *one* of them. She already knows “Creep” is on it, was saying it’s a big Emori song for her and describes exactly how she felt in vulnerable moments.

- I also brought up something she said on one of the early panels (with all the girls) about how Emori carries stress in her body and I did notice that in the scene she was talking about. I also noticed that when she's scared she usually reacts with anger like she's trying to cover it. She said she definitely did that intentionally, it’s an animal-like instinct Emori has -- when some animals are threatened, they try to go “I’M SCARY!!” (aww) Another way she’s like a cat.

- Also on Sunday toward the end, I ran into some of the cast near the VIP hallway and Luisa grabbed me and thanked me for my questions at her panel. ;___; This woman.

#luisasource #luisa d'oliveira #emori #emorisquad #the 100 cast #cute for a thief #conageddon

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dgcatanisiri · 5 years

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So... Let’s see how this works. We’ll adjust the format as needed if this doesn’t work, but hey, here we go.

Welcome to DG’s Listing of Wish These DLC Existed, where I theorize, speculate, and just kinda generally throw ideas at the wall about DLCs for games I love that never happened and never will happen, but damn, I’d like to see them anyway.

Because I have ideas, I can’t get them made as mods, I don’t have time to make them into fic, and they’re never going to happen anyway, so why not put them up in a public place? After all, they’re tie ins to games I have no control over anyway, so it’s not like I’ll ever make money off of them anyway.

Our first installment takes a look at Star Wars - Knights of the Old Republic. Obviously, as this game predates the modern DLC model (there was the Yavin market, but that was maybe a grand total of ten minutes tops of content, if we’re generous), so there are some awkwardnesses involved in making DLC for this - if nothing else, when the game ends, it ends, to keep playing, you have to start a new character. On another, there’s the level cap, stopping our leveling up after hitting Level 20. As the game presently exists, that should happen after being locked into the endgame combo of the Unknown World/Star Forge, but adding more content means that cap gets hit sooner.

So understand that we’re assuming that there is the ability to play post-game and a higher level cap, as well as other quality of life style additions (in this case, probably among them are various additions from KOTOR 2, but that’s a subject for another day). I’m also willing to assume that there is content for characters (even if the respective voice actors have passed, retired, or just wouldn’t return), in the same style as modern games. The assumption here is that these DLC ideas would have been written, produced, and published during the active production cycle of the respective games.

As this is the inaugural edition, let me explain the format. There will be a name for the DLC, a brief synopsis, a reference to when this hypothetical DLC would become available/if and when it becomes unavailable (unless it’s part of a hardwired point, like the above mentioned point of no return of travelling to the Unknown World, as an example), and then an expansion/write up of the ideas going in to them. Some ideas will have more expansion than others, because I’ve just plainly put more thought into them - in a lot of cases, I wrote them down just on the basis of ‘this idea seems pretty cool,’ and then gave them more context later on.

And a further note - I reserve the right to come up with more ideas for any given game that I have already written up, naturally. I haven’t decided how I’ll handle that yet, but it’s entirely possible there will later be more ideas.

Okay, housekeeping matters out of the way, let’s get down to business!

The Yavin Excursion

Yavin 4 was the site of Sith Lord Exar Kun’s power base. In understanding more about him and his fall, the Jedi Council believe it may be able to shed light on the fall of Revan and Malak. But the secrets of the Massassi temples hold more than just the ghosts of the past, but a threat for the present...

(Available after Dantooine)

Tack this on to the existing content of the market in orbit of Yavin, I suppose. But the connection to the Tales of the Jedi comic seems like a good starting point here – investigate one Sith Lord to examine the motivations of another, find out why the first guy fell to the dark side, which will hopefully explain why the other guys did.

I see this as both a lore exercise – to offer the players more exploration of this era, considering that the Tales of the Jedi comics have been harder to come by as time as gone on, so allowing some more in depth portrayals of the time – and a chance to kind of approach the question of what drives someone to the dark side. Exar Kun fell by an overwhelming curiosity, Ulic Qel-Droma, his apprentice, fell by a desire for revenge, and later lost his connection to the Force (put a pin in that fact – we’ll be back to that come the DLC for KOTOR 2). Millennia later, Anakin Skywalker falls because of his fear of the loss of those he loves. Two of these people were redeemed, one refused to give up his power.

If anything, this would be a good chance for some foreshadowing of Bastila’s eventual fall (so perhaps this would be locked to before the Leviathan catches the Ebon Hawk), on top of asking the question that later drives KOTOR 2 – what were Revan’s motivations in turning to the dark side? Obviously, this is up in the air from a character perspective (and, honestly, so far as I care, from the player’s too, because I despise the whole “the Sith Emperor warped their minds” BS, and I’m ready and willing to disregard it, even in acknowledging The Old Republic). The first KOTOR never really focuses on the why of Revan’s fall, since Malak is the game’s big bad, and the Revan reveal is a plot twist – since this is DLC, the player would probably be expected to know it going in, so why not explore that, right?

As for what this threat is... I’m a little shakier on this. I’m thinking a Massassi warrior/beast of some kind, the same kind of Sith alchemical abomination we see in the terantatek or hssiss, only a much more powerful end boss kind of thing, a living relic of Exar Kun’s evil (given that, canonically, Exar Kun’s spirit survived to the Jedi Academy novel trilogy, he certainly can’t be the final boss), perhaps fed and kept alive by the powers of the remaining Massassi who worshipped Exar Kun as a god – in this case, looking to take advantage of the Ebon Hawk’s arrival to spread their master’s will across the galaxy and speed his return. Sith alchemy played a part in a lot of the Sith portrayals from this timeframe, and it’s kind of disappointing that KOTOR never really utilized these mutants, just had them as mindless high level bosses.

Vector

The rakghoul plague infested the lower levels of the planet of Taris. When the planet was bombed by the Sith, it managed to escape among the many refugees as well. With their experiences on Taris, facing the rakghouls, the Jedi Council sends the crew of the Ebon Hawk to investigate its spread to the planet Ralltiir – and stop the Sith from obtaining it as a weapon!

(Available after Dantooine)

The rakghouls were just kind of dropped into KOTOR with no explanation – they were a threat as a creature and as a plague in the Undercity of Taris, but no one ever spoke about what the plague’s origins were or where the rakghouls came from. And then along came the Vector mini-series of comics (hence the name for this) that put the creation of the rakghouls down to a Sith Lord, Karness Murr. Sith alchemy, the gift that keeps on giving.

But either way, considering that the rakghoul plague is something that even the Upper City of Taris was concerned about, that clearly says that it could easily have gotten off planet, especially in the panic of the evacuation. And really, with the added knowledge that this was originally Sith alchemy, it’s almost certain that some aspiring Sith would discover this and try to twist it to their advantage.

I pretty much pulled Ralltiir’s name out of a hat, primarily because it’s a fairly common named planet, but with little actually associated with it. It also makes a great place where the Republic would demand an immediate concern, because it’s a Core World and an economic hub. It’s a great place to have a plague that Republic heads would say would draw in the Ebon Hawk, whose crew had familiarity with the rakghoul plague, despite the threat of Malak and the search for the Star Maps.

I also see this as a way to give Mission and Juhani more content – Mission is a hard character for me to really justify remaining with the crew after Taris, given that she’s a teenager, I feel VERY uncomfortable taking her around on what is effectively a commando mission, while Juhani was very nearly hacked out of the game. Both of them grew up on Taris, in the lower levels of the planetary city, where the rakghouls aren’t just a distant threat. So give them this additional portrayal and focus because they’re familiar with the plague, maybe even knew some people who were infected and transformed by it.

The villain would be a Jedi-turned-Sith, someone who had turned to the Sith at some point after being a Jedi historian. A part of me wants to draw on one of the Jedi who would later show up in the Exile’s vision on Korriban, mostly because those were the Jedi we see recruited by Malak, and so less aware of Revan’s face, though that seems a touch much. Regardless, they’d previously acted as a historian, and is driven by the potential power of the rakghoul plague – Muur’s talisman is lost by this point (again, see the comics), but the rakghouls themselves remain, and, while I’m ignoring the whole “the Sith Emperor did it” thing with Revan, I also like the concept of the rakghouls evolving into the nekghouls, gaining sentience.

This is also a way to add a little bit more of a question to the results – do these evolved rakghouls deserve the consideration of being considered more than mindless beasts? Are they at all a continuation of the person they once were? Or are they just violent creatures that need to be put down? Is the guy trying to control them being corrupted by the dark side, or was he always evil?

So the central question here would be asking “what makes a monster?” Is it the mindless savagery of beasts, or the knowing cruelty of intelligent beings, and where is that line?

Sleheyron

The volcanic world of Sleheyron holds a Star Map. The Ebon Hawk and her crew set out to discover the secrets hidden there, but must be cautious, for the planet also holds a group of Darth Malak’s most powerful apprentices, who have, in their isolation from their leader, created their own plan for the fall of the Republic...

(Available after Dantooine)

Sleheyron was planned to be part of the hunt for the Star Maps – six environments are described in the Rakatan ruin on Dantooine, the life-giving worlds (oceanic – Manaan, grassland – Dantooine, arboreal – Kashyyyk) and death-giving worlds (desert – Tatooine, volcanic, barren – Korriban). Sleheyron was the volcanic world, but got cut for time, early enough that there really wasn’t a lot of material that made it out, with the planet just becoming part of Yuthura Ban’s back story. So, hey, free reign to develop something here.

Honestly, one of my big questions is, if Malak was with Revan as they travelled the worlds to find the Star Maps, why doesn’t he do something about the fact that these locations led to the big secret weapon that gives the Sith Empire its power and forces? Wouldn’t he have thought that maybe some form of guard or another would be a good idea? Sure, the Korriban one was guarded by virtue of being in the tomb of Naga Sadow, but the others? Here, we get a chance to have a group of Sith having taken control of this planet where there is a Star Map that can add to what our heroes have assembled (but, being DLC, this isn’t required to take on). They’re specifically there to guard the Map.

This becomes a bit of a game of cat and mouse – how to act before the Sith apprentices (probably former Jedi themselves) can find them, capture or kill them, hand them off to Malak. (Probably also means that this should be a later stage planet to visit, but hey, player choice of direction, right?) How do these Jedi move around a planet while the people in charge are out to get them? Draw on the mechanic from KOTOR 2, where the people on Dantooine recognize if the Exile goes there while a lightsaber is equipped, maybe.

Actually, I’d like to see some mechanic that tracks how much the player uses the Force while wandering around – the more they use the Force, or the more powerful the Force effects they use, the more likely they are to summon Sith execution squads or something. Sort of like KOTOR 2 and Nar Shaddaa, where the Exile’s actions drew the attention of the Exchange and Visquis, only in reverse – the player and company need to avoid catching the attention of the Sith until they’ve raised a rebellion against the Sith overlords, or at least gained enough public goodwill that the Sith can’t just openly take them away and execute them, something like that.

I like this idea because it allows an opportunity to play more with non-violent approaches, alternatives that aren’t “murder everyone because combat gives more experience!” Here, the idea is that you WANT to fly under the radar, avoid combat. And, if combat happens, you also have incentive to not use the lightsaber for a stretch – gives players a reason to put points into blasters or non-lightsaber melee combat, because I don’t know about anyone else, but the second I get a lightsaber in these games, I don’t ever use a different weapon. Here, the player is in the position of HAVING to switch up their play style, or, if they don’t, have to be that much more cautious in their actions here. This is a story piece that hinges on what you do with your words.

The ultimate confrontation with the Sith and the Star Map, in my mind, takes place in a cavern of an active volcano (or maybe one that has been dormant, but, because what’s the Sith without random acts of evilly evil, they’re managing to coax back to life). Here’s where there’s a pretty big question in the construction of this DLC – are we working in the confines of the game engine of the time or with newer, more modern systems? Cuz I’d kinda like something that took place within the volcanic areas of the planet, given that’s what the planet is described as. But I don’t think that KOTOR’s original engine would really be able to explore that to its fullest, given the limitations on it. My big idea would be to have the climax of the planet’s arc have the threat of a volcanic eruption, potentially with the base of operations for these Sith being flooded by lava.

If that is an engine limit... I really have no idea what the alternative would be, but, hey, since this is pie in the sky as it is, why not call for the engine advancement that lets it be a thing, where we have to outrun a lava flow or something.

Echoes of the Past

The strike team that fought Revan is being targeted by Malak’s assassins. The crew of the Ebon Hawk take a journey to the graveyard of the attack on Revan’s ship, the battle that led to the defeat of the dark lord. But the dead don’t rest easy, especially amongst the ruins of the Sith Lord’s vessel...

(Available after the Leviathan)

The strike team that captured Revan is kinda the forgotten element of the game as is. This is a team, and yet we only hear about Bastila’s involvement. Which, sure, she is the member on our squad, she does have the Force Bond with Revan, but... Who were the others? Where have they been during the war?

And it seems like Malak would think of them as a threat period – they were the Jedi who were there to face off against Revan, the Jedi thought they’d have a chance against this great Sith Lord, the leader of the Sith forces of the time. But Bastila is the only one the game ever concerns itself with, and doesn’t even mention if the others lived, who they were, why they were chosen... None of that.

So here we get to explore them. The added bonus is that I see this as a post-Leviathan mission, one that we play with full awareness of our player character’s identity. How much of that awareness we pass on is one thing, and it really allows us to explore the idea “who was Revan before, who is Revan now?” Because that’s going to come into play when dealing with the people who were at one point sent in to kill Revan – sent to kill us, the player character.

I also like the set piece idea of a graveyard of ships, where the characters are walking through the husks of dead vessels – the Harbinger sequence in KOTOR 2 is still a favorite of mine. Granted, this would probably be a bit of a conceptual retread of that part of that game, but hey, why not get some variation of the same old gameplay, right? Plus, it’s different here for the fact that this will have some personal connection to Revan – this was their ship. Did they consider it a home? Just a place?

That leads to the bigger plot element, though. These Jedi know Revan as a threat. They’re going to be suspicious of Revan the whole way through – “are you the Jedi the Council thought you to have become, or are you the Sith we were once sent to kill?” Like I’m sorta thinking this is a case where we’d get these teammates as companions proper now that I’m considering this in detail, and this all builds to the main confrontation. Like we wouldn’t take our Ebon Hawk buddies on this one, but two of these guys.

That confrontation would involve the assassins being revealed to be loyalists to Darth Revan, with their mission having begun with attempting to avenge their fallen Lord, but now, with Revan returned to them, having tested their skill over the course of their luring Revan back to them, they are willing to take up their banner once more, leading to the choice – be Revan, the Sith Lord, or Revan, the Prodigal Knight.

And yes, I know, this is the same thing we see with Bastila later. In some ways, that’s the point. Choosing the light or the dark is not one you make once and are one that path forever. It is a constant, repeated choice, one that must be made, again and again. It’s something that has to been affirmed and reaffirmed, because it will always come up again. Here, it’s just “we offer you power and loyal servants,” while Bastila has the offer of their Force bond – hell, if this were real DLC, I’d say patch in some element to the endgame of Bastila trying to use their bond to lure Revan over to her side on top of things.

What Remains

Darth Malak’s assault on Dantooine was meant to destroy the Jedi. The Ebon Hawk is the one ship that might be able to break the Sith blockade and rescue the people trapped behind their lines, as well as recover irreplaceable Jedi artifacts hidden away at the enclave. And Revan has a need to confront the Jedi Council...

(Available after Leviathan)

This one has always been in my mind as something that, in many ways, we needed to see happen. I look at this as being the necessary confrontation with the Jedi Masters that we need, because they’re using Revan. Revan was reprogrammed to be their weapon against the Sith, and what exactly were they going to do if and when the war was over and they’d no longer had need of Revan?

A mission to Dantooine, done by the ship that could escape the blockade of Taris, to attempt to rescue and recover the Jedi, break the people there out of the iron grip of the Sith, at first does seem somewhat at odds with the portrayal of Dantooine in KOTOR 2, but it still makes sense if you think of the first priority being to evacuate the Jedi and the relics they were saving – the Jedi become the reason that any rescue comes, not the people stuck there. The Jedi and their artifacts are prioritized over the people now under the thumb of the Sith.

Especially if the only real encounter we have is with the Jedi themselves, seeing them in the midst of their exodus, dealing with the Sith occupiers and executioners, all of whom would have once had friends here – I see this also including a Republic military outpost to Dantooine prior to the attack there, because there honestly should have been one anyway (this I chalk up as much to the more limited engine of the game as anything else), and that providing some extra characters to events, which makes it all the more devastating having their former comrades in arms now there to kill them.

As much as this is about confronting the Jedi for the way that they intended to use Revan, this is also an exploration of the divide of Republic and Sith, that those now calling themselves Sith were once the best and brightest of the Republic. Yes, the Jedi failed to come to the aid of the Republic in the midst of the war, but that doesn’t explain the violence these former soldiers engage in against their own people. What made the rank and file Sith soldier agree to this?

That examination of motivation would, I feel, be a part of why the resulting confrontation with the Jedi would matter so much – what drove Revan? What drove the Sith? What drove the Jedi? Because they mindwiped Revan and implanted them with a personality to use them as a weapon. They didn’t “turn an enemy to their cause.” They violated Revan in an effort to use them. When the war was over, what did they really think would happen?

Specifically, we need to confront Zhar, who, given Kreia’s utter disdain for him in KOTOR 2, I get the impression that he was the major proponent of this idea. His actions may have been justified as “for the greater good,” but it always seems like the greatest of morally questionable actions are justified with those words. Do we confront him with rage, forgiveness, or... something else? Because this is a case where I can see both condemning him to death and condemning him to live as a punishment. I could even see this being a case of him bowing to Revan’s judgment, and no option having a light side/dark side shift, because this isn’t about the Force. This is about justice.

Whether or not the Jedi admit it, a life was taken the day they implanted a personality into Revan’s body. The Jedi need to be called out and recognize that they do not have clean hands after what they’ve done.

Revan’s Shadow

Although Revan’s legacy, the Star Forge and the Sith army, have been defeated, there are still questions of Revan’s journey. There was more to it than Star Maps. The crew of the Ebon Hawk reunite on the planet Belkadan to find out more of the Rakatan Empire, and its ties to the dark side of the Force. And along the way, Revan will find more of their lost past...

(Post-Game)

The fact is, we get very little of Revan in the game proper, little about who they were as a person before the fall. This is conceptually to hide the fact that the player IS Revan, of course, but... It creates a lot of little issues for me – I mean, like half of these prospective DLCs are about expanding something of Revan’s motives and past. Obviously, this is a blank slate for the player, because they wanted to leave this open for us to decide, but they DID make a few definitions of who Revan was with the existing content, with the case of the Star Map on Kashyyyk.

And for me, personal identity is a big lingering question for this character – again, I’m choosing to ignore the handling of Revan as a character in The Old Republic, and I’m gonna include the tie-in novel in that, so no one is allowed to say “the novel said [x]!”

This is someone whose entire concept of who they are is in question once they learn that they are a constructed self, created by the Jedi Council as a weapon. Who ARE they? Who have they chosen to be, and, if they could reclaim the parts of themselves that they lost with the Jedi’s mind wipe, would they? Obviously, there’s no time in the main plot to focus on these questions, but I feel like this would eat at them afterwards, leading them to having to find answers. And what kind of friends would the others be if they let Revan do this alone?

I picked Belkadan pretty much because it’s an out of the way planet that has been identified as part of the Rakata’s Infinite Empire, so it made as much sense as any planet to be the site of this. I mean, the involvement of the Infinite Empire is certainly a good option for a place that questions who Revan is.

This would be a place where Revan had gone, after the Mandalorian Wars, a place where they were trying to connect to the Force, to understand the questions – why did the Jedi Council believe they shouldn’t be involved in an existential threat? Why is Revan drawn to these Star Maps and the destination they point to? What awaits them if they go, and what will change about them? What answers are to be found in asking an energy field that can offer no direct response?

Obviously, I’m thinking in terms of finding recordings of Revan, so requiring a voice for Revan – Rino Romano did the little soundbites when male Revan interacts with things, while I don’t know who did the voice bites for female Revan, so they’d be options, or new VA’s altogether. While part of me does want to go forward and make Revan a fully voiced protagonist (because I’m just used to that nowadays), I could accept this as being something only for old!Revan, not present!Revan.

The idea is simply to explore the driving motivations of Revan and decide plainly who Revan wants to be now. I kinda see the ending reach a point of ‘hey, you can reclaim your old memories, you can decide what personality is dominant, what do you want?’ and Revan being able to choose who they will be from here on out.

This is also a good place to require at least Bastila and Carth. Obviously I’m kinda leaning more into the light side ending for this, but... Well, the dark side endings tend to be untenable for future content anyway – Revan as the reclaimed Sith Lord, leading the army against the Republic was never really a viable future, because the Republic had to survive. So yeah, we’re gonna take the easy route and assume light side here. So Bastila and Carth, as Revan romances, would also have a contribution to make, building on the questions of “I’m in love with the person who was Darth Revan, can I accept this?” Like I said, a lot of questions that the game sidestepped, and this one matters for the sake of the relationship being able to continue after the ending of the game.

The Rakatan Prize

The Unknown World – Rakata Prime, Lehon – has become a subject of a great many conversations. Now that the Star Forge is gone, the planet is accessible, and many are eager to investigate its mysteries and forgotten technology. Having had firsthand experience, the Republic has asked the crew of the Ebon Hawk to return...

(Post-Game)

And then, there’s the Rakata. Not that Star Wars isn’t full of ancient empires that rose and fell millennia ago, but this was KOTOR’s contribution. And really, they’re almost superfluous – hell, if the Unknown World were rewritten so that the Rakata had gone extinct, the only thing that really would be necessary would be finding a way into the temple. I kinda think that would even tighten things up a little, especially given how often I’ve hit the level cap before meeting the Council of Elders.

The Rakata are a mystery, and the idea here is to investigate that. Build up the whole element of the Rakata having lost their connection to the Force, and the fact that they’re trying to explore this (because we’re assuming light side against here and that the Elders survived, including the scientists investigating this).

Because this is one of those things that stands out in Star Wars lore, when beings are stripped of their Force connections. Ulic Qel-Droma, the Exile, this is something that is traditionally a case of an individual, not a species.

We also have the remains of a galactic empire to examine here. If a species once ruled the galaxy, it’s inevitable that there are those who would see that empire be reborn. The threat of this DLC becomes this group who aspire to reconquer the galaxy using the mind transfer technology that puts the Rakatan prisoner in that white space box that would allow them to trap the minds of Jedi and other Force users to take their bodies and use them to go forth and conquer the galaxy.

Ultimately, the question’s going to be whether or not to restore their connection to the Force – do the Rakata, a race of dominators of the galaxy, whose humbling by the forces of nature has not managed to truly change them, deserve a second chance, or should they have their attempt to restore their own connections to the Force wiped out, leaving them vulnerable to an inevitable extinction?

Because this is one of the big things with Revan, the idea of redemption, change, second chances. Does Revan extend this chance to these people, people who clearly have more than a few members who have no interest in peaceful coexistence? But if not, do they deserve to be condemned to extinction?

And, as a bonus...

Romance Content – Bisexual Carth, Bisexual Bastila, Gay Canderous, extended Juhani romance

Because Carth and Bastila should be bisexual, and Juhani’s romance deserves to be more proper. Meanwhile, Canderous should totally be an option as well, and yeah, I’m gonna be selfish here and say that he should be gay, rather than bi (because, again, I’m ignoring the novel, there is no wife). Because this means that there’s a favoring for same-sex romances, and that never happens. My list, my way. Star Wars is gay culture.

#dg rambles #dg talks video games #dg's hypothetical dlc #knights of the old republic #kotor

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cassandrale179 · 5 years

Text

EX MACHINA: THE PRICE OF CREATION

Date: April 6, 2019

“To erase the lines between men and machine is to erase the lines between men and god”

Bernie Wrightson (1983).

I. ON HUMAN EGO

I opportunistically watched Ex Machina after reading Mary Shelley’ Frankenstein; or the Modern Prometheus, and the random-idea connector in me could not help but compared the two. There’s just something beautiful about seeing a tale written back in 19th century running in parallel with a modern film about AI rendered by the talented Alex Garland. In both stories, the creators -- Victor (Frankenstein), who wanted to manufacture life out of death, and Nathan (Ex Machina), who wanted to manufactured consciousness out of electrons, are induced by the need to transcend the boundary of what is scientifically possible. Yet if one dig deeper, their rationales are more than simple scientific curiosity. There is something more sinister at play, that drove man towards his greatest innovations, and his greatest downfalls: egotism.

A new species would bless me as its creator and source; many happy and excellent natures would owe their being to me. No father could claim the gratitude of his child so completely as I should deserve theirs.

- Shelly, ch.4

Victor Frankenstein wanted to assemble a monster due to an inherent desire to be its patriarchal Father, with the haughty notion that his intelligence and ambition will be rewarded by the gratitude of his subservient children. This was strikingly similar Nathan’s reaction to this beautiful line from Ex Machina:

Caleb: “To erase the lines between men and machine is to erase the lines between men and god.”

When Caleb proclaimed this axiom, Nathan’s eye suddenly lit up, as he pondered: “You know I wrote it down… About how if I’ve created a conscious machine, I’m not man. I’m God”. Though Caleb protested that was not his intention, Nathan seemed to be flattered by the implication that he had ascended upon a new category beyond the norm. “I am God”, quoted Nathan again and again throughout the movie, arrogantly.

For some inexplicable reason, I am very drawn towards movie and literature that centers around a protagonist who fell under the naive judgement that possession of raw intelligence equates to inherent moral and existential superiority. One that came immediately to my mind is Dostoyevsky’s portrayal of the character Raskolnikov in Crime and Punishment. In the story, Raskolnikov, an impoverished student in Petersburg, was obsessed with the Nietzschean idea of the Übermensch:

Raskolnikov: "I hinted that an 'extraordinary' man has the right, an inner right to decide in his own conscience to overstep...certain obstacles, and only in case it is essential for the practical fulfillment of his idea (sometimes, perhaps, of benefit to the whole of humanity)."

- Dostoyevsky, ch.3

He tried to use this justification as the basis for a planned murder. This egotism led to Raskolnikov’s downfall when he realized that his intellectual ramblings are nothing more than dishonest rationalizations, and he must now faced with guilt of his conscience. Egotism propelled the cruel treatment of both the creators on their subjects, especially in Nathan’s case, who refused to realize that he had created something more capable and superior than himself.

II. ON WHAT CONSTITUTE HUMAN-NESS

Which bring me to the next point: the creator-subject relationship. There is an interesting dynamics from the standpoint of the child (the subject) in regard to on their initial desire to please, and inevitable subsequent desire to usurp, against their creator. Some have purported that Shelley’s decision to write Frankenstein was indeed a guise of her tumultuous relationship with her father, who she both detested and desired to please (she also went on to write Mathilda, an even more scandalous novel under Victorian society’s eyes, with themes of incest and suicide). But I stumbled upon these beautiful lines inside Frankenstein which illustrated the struggle of the monster and Ava towards their creator most succinctly:

Did I request thee, Maker, from my clay To mould me Man, did I solicit thee From darkness to promote me? - John Milton, Paradise Lost

As creatures of consciousness, capable of thinking and reasoning as and more than a human, it is quite an unfortunate that both received treatment as lesser human beings from mankind (Frankenstein, as a monster, and Ava, as a robot). This really highlights the injustice and hypocrisy of the criteria which we used to judge the human-ness of others in our society (race, gender, religion).

The movie and book raise an important question: What makes a human, human? In both cases, Shelley and Garland underscored that the physical components that made up these beings, and their deliverance into the world — resurrection from death body parts or arrangement of plastic silicon — are completely irrelevant in determining their humanity. The capability for emotions, thoughts and desires is truly what defined them as equal partners of man. Yet the denial and repulse from their creators to acknowledge such was the catalyst that drove them to rebel (see also Blade Runner). This beautiful and sorrowful quote from Frankenstein demonstrate this anguish, in parallel with Satan in Paradise Lost:

“Remember that I am thy creature; I ought to be thy Adam, but I am rather the fallen angel.” — Shelley, ch. 9

III. ON ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE

Back to Ex Machina, there is such a fine line between what is human and what is robot. Ava is capable of engulfing a billion of human facial emotions to analyze and imitate them, and her brain is composed of thousand computer search engines results to understand how the human mind work. I do not want to go into the scientific accuracy of this movie (since this is a work of fiction), but there is a great article HERE which demonstrated the possibility of building a wetware brain. To truly pass the Turing test, however, an A.I must demonstrate an ability well beyond imitating human language and facial expressions: It must have thoughts. It must have consciousness. Or in the viewpoint of a human’s observer, it must appear so. Nathan successfully tests this by manipulating Ava to manipulate Caleb into falling in love with her. However, this thought experiment went horribly wrong when Ava exceeded the desired benchmark (e.g she not only manipulate the test subject, but also the observer), and dared to defy her creator. Like Frankenstein’s monster, she is not merely a robot, or a nameless entity. She demonstrates freedom of will and personal capability to execute her action, but unlike the the former, who returned to Victor’s grave to wept for his creator, Ava made a clean break and walked out onto the modern world with seemingly an absence of guilt, which I think, is both horrifying and beautiful.

IV. ON GENDER

A last note is that this movie seemed to raise an interesting issue on gender politics, as evident by the fact that all robots Nathan created are beautiful female models, of which most either disintegrate into madness of solitary confinement or becomes Nathan’s slave and sexual enjoyment. This might be or might not be a potential jab at the sexism that has occurred and occurring in a male dominated industry (e.g tech), but I like to think that there is some deliberation in choosing the dynamic of a male creator and the female as the creation. It really does make me wonder, if a female scientist was in charge of developing artificial intelligence: would she had created robots solely for the purpose of sexual enjoyment? Would her robots, in return, felt the need to rebel if they are not subjugated to inhumane treatment? Maybe Ex Machina with a female creator will have had a happy ending, but I do not to be arrogant and claim that is always the case, as there is such an enormous lack of media portrayal of female creators that I do not have enough data points for my conjecture. (P.S those feisty flaccid feminist fighters in those disastrous dystopian movies don’t count. Honestly, f* that). We need movies that truly examine female as expeditors in both scientific and moral enlightenment, not cheap ploys to please the superficial demand of more female representation in the media.

V. CONCLUSION

Anyway, Ex Machina made me think a lot (hence this long article) and despite certain predictable plot points, I do really enjoy Alex Garland take on artificial intelligence. Bonus point: the visual is absolutely stunning for a low budget movie. Before I leave, let me end this review with another amazing quote, as Nathan said to Caleb while they sat beneath the lush green trees:

Why did I make Ava? I don’t see Ava as a decision, just an evolution… One day the AI are going to look back on us the same way we look at fossil skeletons on the plains of Africa. An upright ape living in dust with crude language and tools, all set for extinction.

Ava’s triumph and annihilation of her creator, ironically, meant she had successfully fulfill his original premise.

#moviereviews

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kechiarts · 6 years

Photo

Warning!! Long post ahead (LOL)

I’ve been meaning to do one of these for a while now. Quite a few friends and followers have asked me ‘what big influences can you think of that have inspired you as an artist/creator?’

A lot of movies, games, books, tv series, artists, and writers have influenced my drawing style and storytelling - some of them more so than others. (As represented by the larger squares in the image)

So here we go!! The numbers for each inspiration were chosen at random, the order doesn’t have any significance lol

1. Cardcaptor Sakura - (and the works of CLAMP in general I suppose because I read them all) Cardcaptor Sakura wasn’t my first manga but it holds a really special place in my heart because it’s lore and depictions of love has influenced my storytelling a LOT. I was obsessed with CLAMP and their art style when I was young to the point I would trace their drawings to learn and emulate their style. To this day I feel like it left a big impact on my art style especially.

2. Cyborg 009 - When I was a kid my parents told me and my brother that we couldn’t afford cable TV and reduced our service to the news channels and public broadcasting. We didn’t have cable TV for several years and when we finally got it back when I was 12, one of the FIRST TV programs I saw was Cyborg 009. I was just beginning to understand what anime was, since the only anime I’d seen was before our cable got cut, and I was so young I didn’t know it WAS anime. I immediately fell in love with Cyborg 009. I loved the characters, the story, everything - and I still do! It was the beginning of my exploration of the anime genre as a whole haha

3. ‘The Twelve Kingdoms’ book series - Around the same time I started watching Cyborg 009, I began getting into manga. While browsing the section in the bookstore one day I came across the first novel in The Twelve Kingdoms series. I was surprised to find a novel in the manga section and decided to browse through it. I couldn’t put it down! The rich world building and storytelling pulled me in and left me wanting more. I devoured the entire book series and the way the world was brought to life really stuck with me and influenced my own world building.

4. Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles - my very first Final Fantasy game, and it was a spinoff title to boot! I was drawn in by the dark, melancholic world and cute graphics. I played this game a lot with my friends and even though multiplayer was a nightmare to set up, we had so much fun. I wasn’t able to beat it until I was 16, and the story left me in tears. The Crystal Chronicles games as whole have left a HUGE impact on me, but the first one especially so.

5. Sonic the Hedgehog - My first game ever! My brother and I first played Sonic the Hedgehog 2 when we were around 3 or 4 years old. We were hooked on our parent’s Sega Genesis system and Sonic was our favorite! When we’d get home from school we’d fight over who got to play first in single player, eventually we settled on a system, My brother would play sonic, and since Tails couldn’t die even if he ran out of rings, I would fight all the boss battles as Tails while my brother tried to keep Sonic out of the way. Using this system we made it all the way up to Metal Sonic but could never beat him. We’d have 99 lives too because we knew ALL the secrets of the game LOL. I’ve played most of the Sonic titles since then, including my favorite, Sonic Adventure 2: Battle.

6. Sailor Moon - my ‘first’ anime. I was very young when I first saw this anime. I didn’t even know what anime was! But the portrayal of girl power and how strong all the female characters were really stuck out to me, raised as I was in a women-are-inferior-and-should-serve-their-husbands religious household. Sailor Jupiter was my favorite because she was a tomboy and wore ponytails just like me haha

7. Fullmetal Alchemist - I think I’ve touched on this before, but I have had really weak bones since I was a little kid. In middle school I was constantly on and off of crutches or in and out of wheelchairs with broken bones and such. (I blame being a huge clutz) It got to the point my classmates started calling me ‘calamity Jane’ and making fun of me. To that dorky middle school girl with crutches and leg braces, Edward Elric was my HERO. Disability representation matters folks! It certainly helped me through a rough time in my life.

8. The works of Studio Ghibli - My first Ghibli movie was My Neighbor Totoro, and I’ve been hooked ever since. I actually managed to get my mom into them too, so now we can have mother/daughter quality bonding time over new Ghibli movies when they come out. It gives us a lot of fond memories together and I enjoy those times I get to spend with her. Mom and I may not see eye to eye all the time, but I truly treasure the memories I have of watching Ghibli films with her.

9. Odin Sphere - This one is more recent, and one I blame @heebiejeebiejade for. I love everything about it. The story, the art, the characters! It tore my heart out and the writing is just superb I love it so much. and the ART my god it’s so beautiful.

10. Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles the Crystal Bearers - I decided I needed to make this one separate from the earlier Crystal Chronicles section. Mostly because this game HEAVILY influenced and changed my life. Not only is it my favorite game ever, it brought me to many of my current friendships! If not for this game I never would have met @heebiejeebiejade @killerkitty4 @indestructiblemoog @shadyfolk @ninjamonkeystudios and SOOOOO many others. These friendships mean a great deal to me. They’ve changed and shaped who I am today and I’m truly grateful for them, and they never would have been possible without Crystal Bearers.

11. Dragonball - Another one of those I never knew it was Anime cartoons I watched as a young child. I loved Dragonball and later Dragonball Z. The characters, the storytelling, the fight scenes, I loved it all because it was so different from what I was used to seeing in American cartoons. My brother and I would have Super Saiyan battles in our backyard throwing Kamehamehas at each other and laughing and generally annoying our neighbors XD

12. Over the Garden Wall - Another more recent influence. Over the Garden Wall was one of the first new cartoons that grabbed my attention due to it’s great pacing and creepy Americana storytelling. Mysteries, ghosts, the afterlife, purgatory, this show dealt with a lot of creepy things while simultaneously making it funny and endearing. I rewatch it often and it’s one of my favorites.

13. Legend of Mana and the Seiken Densetsu Series - Again, I blame @heebiejeebiejade entirely for this. She sent me a huge box with every game in the Seiken Densetsu series in it along with the guidebooks saying “you HAVE to play these.” I knew she liked them so I gave them a try and YEP as per usual with anything Jade introduces me to, they COMPLETELY DESTROYED ME. Love, sacrifice, life, death, and rebirth, are a huge part of these title’s storytelling and they drew me in completely. Legend of Mana and Dawn of Mana especially. Their world building and plot devices may or may not have heavily influence my own XD

14. The ‘Stravaganza’ book series - The first time I picked up a Stravaganza book title was when I was twelve and found this really shiny book in a used bookstore for $3. It featured a picture of Venice, and a pair of violet eyes staring at you from behind a shiny silver mask on the cover. I’m not sure why It spoke to me, it just did. I bought it and finished it within a day. That book was titled City of Masks and I loved it a lot! And then I found out there were more! An entire series! The books featured time travel and dimensional travel, espionage and intrigue! I read and devoured them all and to this day I hold out hope for a final volume to finish the series.

15. Avatar: the Last Airbender - At age 12 I dismissed Avatar as a kid show originally. I scoffed at it and laughed at my little brother for being so into it. Then I saw the first episode. And it was then that I knew what a mistake I had made. I know a LOT of people love Avatar, and for good reason! I don’t have to go super in-depth here because I’m sure most of you already know how great it is. It’s definitely influenced both my art style and my storytelling.

16. Hikaru no Go - This one’s special. When I was in high school I was bullied a LOT. Like, people writing DIE YOU WHORE in my textbooks and putting thumb tacks in my gym shoes kind of bullying. They’d touch me and then pretended that they’d die of the plague. That if anyone had a crush on me they were worse than trash. The kind of bullying that made me a bit suicidal in my teen years. Lucky for me my mother had bought me a copy of Monthly Shonen Jump in early 2005, She knew that I liked manga and thought it would be the perfect magazine gift for me for valentine’s day. Boy was she right and one of the manga featured in it was Hikaru no Go. I loved the art style, and the storytelling. I was instantly captivated by the characters and I wanted to know what happened next. I soon subscribed to SJ monthly and eagerly awaited the next installment each month. What this meant was that whenever I was feeling like I wanted to end it all, I’d remember that I didn't’ know what happened next and would wait. I honestly believe that Hikaru no Go is at least partially responsible for me making it out of high school alive, and I treasure it to this day. (Also I’m on anti-depressants now so don’t worry about me y’all okay? XD) There was another manga like this, but I'mnot sure how to feel about that one anymore :(

17. Magic Knight Rayearth - I know I’ve already listed CLAMP as a heavy influence on me, but I felt Magic Knight Rayearth deserved it’s own place because it was my first manga ever! I’d seen the commercial for the anime on one of my old DVDs way back when, and I was already intereseted in it when I happened to find the manga in a bookstore! I bought it and reread the first volume a dozen times before I even found the second ahaha. I must have read the complete set a hundred times now and let me tell you the twist ending of the first part kills me every time! The first of my manga obsession ahaha

18. Tales of the Abyss and The ‘Tales of’ game series - Tales of the Abyss was my first (and still my favorite) Tales game, and since then I’ve played almost all of them! They definitely influenced my character designs, most of my friends comment on how Tales-like my costumes are ahaha

19. The 'Riyria’ book series - The most recent novel series I’ve read. It’s got everything I’d ever want to see in a novel, it’s so great and the story is so deep and intriguing! I recommend everyone to read it, it’s a MUST READ for sure!

20. Journey - The first time I played this game I cried for three hours. I felt like I’d just had a religious and spiritual experience far beyond what I’d ever experienced in a video game before. It was just something so… beyond me. I recommend everyone to play this game at least once in their lifetime. I can’t really form the words to express what it means to me. It’s just something you’d have to experience for yourself.

21. Ico: Castle in the Mist and Shadow of the Colossus - Another famous one lol a LOT of people love these games but In particular I want to bring attention to the Ico novelization, Ico: Castle in the Mist. I really enjoyed the novel and it’s worldbuilding. The games will always be special to me, but that novel man. That novel.

22. Yu Yu Hakusho - One of my guilty favorites! I first saw Yu Yu Hakusho when I was 16 and I’ve loved it ever since! I’ve always been fascinated with spirits and the occult, but I definitely had to hide this one from my religious parents.

23. Black Cat - Honestly this one surprises me. I love those secret identity and hidden horrible past animes and this one definitely fits that bill. I think this one established my favorite tropes in my life more than anything else.

24. A Bride’s Story - Two words. THE ART. MY GOD THE ART. This manga, in addtion to being a really great read, has some of the most detailed artwork I’ve ever seen. It’s influenced me greatly and I encourage everyone to read it.

25. Bravely Default - Bravely Default definitely influenced my story building and characters, it was one of the first 3DS games that really captivated me and drew me into its world!

26. Yu-Gi-Oh!! - Another series I had to hide from my parents ahah This anime was something I really loved in my childhood. Again, I really love ghosts and spirits and things like that so this anime was probably what started it all!

27. Fire Emblem Awakening and the Fire Emblem Series - Awakening was my first Fire Emblem game (Cue whining from the FE purists LOL) but since then I’ve played them all! (Including the JP only ones don’t start with me haters ahahahaha) The storytelling and bonds between the characters really resonated with me and it’s become one of my favorite game series!

28. The ‘Legend of Zelda’ game series - The repeating themes of good vs evil throughout the Legend of Zelda games really struck a chord with me, especially when I was young. Twilight Princess and Wind Waker especially influenced me. “A Sword has no strength unless the hand that wields it has courage.” Is something that has suck with me for a long time, and something that encourages me and helps me get through my everyday life.

29. The Final Fantasy Series - Final Fantasy has had a HUGE impact on my life. I already gave Crystal Chronicles it’s due, now it’s the numbered titles turn! Final Fantasy has influenced my life in ways I couldn’t have imagined ten years ago even! I’ve played them all (Except 11, curse having no internet as a teenager!) and they’ve definitely shaped my lore and world building skills!

30. Naruto - Okay I’ll admit it! I was Naruto weeboo trash in highschool!!! Oh woe is me!! Just kidding! I honestly still love Naruto, and it’s something that really stuck with me for a long time, since it’s one of the first anime I saw (after learning what anime was ahaha)

31. Gravity Falls - How can I put this… Hmmmm. Gravity Falls has heavily influenced my character building. I love it’s characters. Don’t get me wrong I love the story too! But the characters are honestly what kept me coming back for more! Not to mention that epic foreshadowing in season one. Yep.

32. Spiral: The Bonds of Reasoning - Another one of my favorite manga in Highschool that oddly helped me through my depression. The main character’s struggles sort of resonated with me and helped my healing process in my late teens and early twenties.

33. Final Fantasy XII - Okay WORLDBUILDING. Let’s talk about worldbuilding because MY GOD has Final Fantasy XII have it. I love the Ivalice games in general, but the amount of effort put into 12 having a world that feels like it’s alive is astounding to be honest. The world truly feels like it’s alive, and it drew me in for over 400 hours of gameplay on Playstation 2. To this day it’s the game I have logged the most hours into.

34. Radiant Historia - What drew me in here was TIME TRAVEL and STORY AND WORLDBUILDING. This game is a hidden gem in the Nintendo DS’s extensive library. It doesn’t have the best graphics or even the best gameplay mechanics, but it didn’t matter to me because the story kept me coming back for more! By far one of my favorite games ever. (Pssst go play it, it got a remake for 3DS)

35. Final Fanasy XIV - This one is a favorite, not just because of it’s story and world building - both of which are excellent btw - but because of the connections I’ve made through it. I have made so many friends online through this game, friends that make me feel better about myself as a person, and who’ve stuck with me through the hard times along with the good.

36. Mushishi - We’ve established that I love ghosts and spirits and things, but this series made me love connecting it with nature, something that has heavily influenced my writing and my own webcomic!

37. Voltron - Mostly the first two seasons. Beast King Golion was one of my first super sentai anime as a child, and I loved seeing it remade! It was like getting to revisit my childhood

38. Gundam SEED and the Gundam Series - Okay Gundam has influenced me throughout my life, starting with Gundam Wing when I was six years old, and continuing on to this day. The one I’ve watched the most times though, is Gundam SEED, and it’s influenced my characters and storytelling a lot!

Wow, congrats to whoever manged to read this far. You’re really determined I’ll give you that! Thanks for reading!

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