#incorrect hogwarts houses

[incorrect-slytherin-quotes]

Slytherin: Hey rave I need my...

Ravenclaw: *hands them their armour*

Slytherin: Oh also I didn't get a chance to...

Ravenclaw: *hands them their daggers*

Slytherin: Marry me?

Ravenclaw: I took care of that too, we've been married for the past seven years...

Slytherin: Excellent...

[magnoliachasewrites]

hufflepuff: I love you so much baby.

slytherin: Are you... Are you talking to a tray of muffins?

(Huff stuffs another muffin into their already over-flowing mouth.)

hufflepuff, chewing: I sense you're judging me.

[miss-beetle]

Slytherin: Don't worry, I've realised I'm not actually in love with you. I just want to be friends. So you don't need to worry about our friendship ending.

Hufflepuff: Lovely!

(She shows him her latest plant. She gives the sunniest smile Sly's ever seen).

Hufflepuff: I'm naming her Ursula.

Slytherin:

Slytherin: Can I take it back?

Hufflepuff: What?

Slytherin: You're cute as fuck. Can I take back what I said about not being in love with you?

[moonjellipihj]

Stuff Slytherin and Hufflepuff do in Uni at random #4

Hufflepuff: *absolutely LOSING THEIR SHT and going rage mode in an argument*

Slytherin: hot

Hufflepuff: say what now?

Slytherin: uhh nothing, don't mind me just keep doing what you're doing..

[slytherpuff-conversations]

Slytherin: What do you wanna do today?

Hufflepuff: TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!

Slytherin: Note to self: never ask you that question again

[milkymoose]

Gryffindor: I bet I can jump this gap.

Slytherin: Do it, I bet you can’t.

Hufflepuff: Ooh I want to try too!

Slytherin: No no, it’s too dangerous.

Hufflepuff: Then why is Gryff allowed to do it?

Slytherin: Cause his bones are too stupid to break.

[theoneandonlyphoenix]

Ravenclaw,probably drunk: stop doing start dreaming.

Slytherin,even more high: yeah that shit takes years of your life but dreams? They take a second.

Ravenclaw: hard work takes ages!

Slytherin: damn light-years-

Ravenclaw,suddenly goes back to function mode: the light years are used for distance in space you asshole

[hanakin-starwalker]

Slytherin: I would murder everyone and everything for you.

Ravenclaw: No, let’s think more logically. Take a deep breath.

Gryffindor: Nooooo! I’d die for anything.

[pottah-head21]

Hufflepuff: You have six children and five chairs. What do you do?

Gryffindor: Share it. Duh.

Slytherin: Compete to death for it. Only the strongest kids will survive.

Ravenclaw: Duplicate it with magic. You could have thousands of chairs, then. No need to share yours.

Gryffindor: What's wrong with sharing?

Hufflepuff: Yeah,Gryffindor is right. We should share.

Ravenclaw: Nah. It's mine.

Slytherin: *Winks at Ravenclaw* That's my girl 😌😌

[little-miss-over-obsessed]

Ravenclaw: While I’m gone, Gryff, you’re in charge

Gryffindor: Yes!

Ravenclaw, whispering: You’re actually in charge

Slytherin: Obviously

[i-am-your-lunch]

Ravenclaw: *taking the rice purity test* Slytherin: *looking over their shoulder* Slytherin: Why'd you say you've never consumed porn Ravenclaw: Because I've never watched it Slytherin: You know word porn counts, right? Ravenclaw: *furiously clicks yes on the question*

[incorrect-slytherin-quotes]

Slytherin: Why do you think I don't like you? I do. I would kill for you.

Slytherin: Ask me to kill for you. Seriously ask me.. i will

Hufflepuff: ...First of all, calm down…

[radical-ghostface]

MC - (worried) Guys, I can’t find Sebastian.

Garreth - Oooh, let me try something. (clears throat) MC IS A SELFISH WOMAN AND A TERRIBLE WITCH-(screams as Sebastian full body tackles him out of nowhere)

Sebastian - WHAT DID YOU SAY

[miss-beetle]

(Slytherin is gazing at Hufflepuff from across the table. When Huff talks you can see every feeling she has. A big smile, a thoughtful frown, and then the most adorable look of confusion. Sly has a soft smile on their lips.)

Slytherin: I love how expressive your face is.

Gryffindor: Yeah sorry Huff, but Sly's right you can be kind of cute.

Slytherin: I never called her cute.

Hufflepuff: Okay firstly - Ouch. Secondly, I'm not cute. I can be really intimidating.

Gryffindor: You have never been intimidating a day in your life, sorry to tell you.

Slytherin: Gryff's right. Here, let's try this. Imagine your whole family being ripped apart by a pack of wolves.

(Hufflepuff pouts her lip, looking genuinely sad at the thought.)

Slytherin, blushing: Fuck, I'm so sorry.

Gryffindor, coughs: Whipped.

Ravenclaw: Can we please get back to working on this assignment?

Slytherin, Gryffindor & Hufflepuff: No.

Ravenclaw: I hate all of you and all of you should hate yourselves.

[moonjellipihj]

Stuff Slytherin and Hufflepuff do in Uni at random #2

(Gryffindor sat between puff and sly)

Hufflepuff: *unconsciously puts her hand on Gryffindors thigh*

Slytherin: *starts poking Hufflepuff's hand with her pencil*

Hufflepuff: Ow! What's wrong?

Slytherin: *holds her hand* did it hurt? I'm sorry.

Hufflepuff: *screaming internally* doesn't hurt that much.

Gryffindor: Were you both lovers in your past lives?

Slytherin and Hufflepuff: *still holding hands* what?

Gryffindor: -nevermind.

[slytherpuff-conversations]

*Watching film*

Hufflepuff: I’m sat here watching being like ‘this scene is quite emotional’ and out of the corner of my eye I can just see you playing with playdoh

Slytherin: Leave my playdoh alone… it gives me something to fidget with