#inquisitorial hijinks

[two-reflections]

When Skitarius Escher-7-42-Aurelia is requisitioned by the Ordo Hereticus, Interrogator Arion Astraeus helps him adjust to the ways of the Inquisition. As they embark on several reconnaissance missions and retrieve a powerful anti-psyker weapon, Arion struggles with the responsibilities of his role and his growing fascination with the newest member of his team. [M, M/M, Action/Romance.]

Finally posting this story here even though it's not my usual content! This was loosely inspired by an excellent Wrath and Glory oneshot and a Dark Heresy 2e campaign. As much as I love painting, I am a massive TTRPG stan at heart.

Huge thanks to a friend who let me use their Forgeworld in this story. (Hope you're doing okay out there, buddy! If you see this, let me know how I can get in touch with you, I want to commission some art for this story. 😁)

[blorger]

Draco is often described in fics as having been Neville's worst bully but is that actually backed by canon ? This intrepid reporter scoured the books for any and all interactions between the two; the results?

See for yourself:

section A: active bullying

Philosopher's Stone is The Book when it comes to any and all Malfoy-based mistreatments of Neville. In PS we have the following interactions:

1)

Draco is a maladjusted little gremlin who doesn't know how to show curiosity for Neville's remembrall in a healthy manner; I give this a 3/10 on the bully scale

2)

Draco straight up curses Neville (the curse itself is treated as funny, Evil Draco is the evil problem), 8/10

same scene, apparently Draco stopped for a chat amidst all the leg locking; middling attempt, 6/10

3)

Draco delivers a group insult at Harry's second match and includes a Neville section, he did not expect any backtalk; 7/10

4)

off-screen forbidden forest hijinks. Harry considers it a joke, does Draco? Does Neville? not enough info; 5/10

BONUS ROUND

Lastly, I'm going to add this conversation from ootp, :

Draco here is indulging in his favorite pastime, Harry-baiting, and Neville is just a bystander. Draco does not seem to know about Neville's parents and he wasn't the intended target but I give this 10/10 because of the psychic damage it causes.

These are actually all the interactions Neville and Draco have in canon: a whole bunch in book 1 and then nothing. This intrigued me so I went looking for:

section B: Draco talking about Neville (but not to him)

1)

This takes place in book 1, during the remembrall scene. Draco is putting on a performance for his fellow Slytherins but actually concentrates very little on Neville's incident, this is literally all he says about him

2)

This takes place in Half-blood Prince, during the compartment scene (wherein Harry is a nosey nancy). This is the only time Draco talks about Neville with no Gryffindors in sight. He is not performing for an audience, merely having a routine discussion with his friends; this gives us the clearest picture of his actual attitude towards Neville (in one word: dismissive). Neville is mentioned in passing and immediately forgotten.

section B (the other way): Neville talking about Draco

1)

This is from book 5. Draco claimed to know a NEWT examiner, Neville shares what he knows. Not even a direct mention.

2)

This is from book 6, Neville saw Malfoy go by. Riveting.

Again, I expected more. Finally, I checked the text for any neutral interactions between the two that may have happened offscreen, as in: both Draco and Neville were in the same location, information was shared between the two (or, more likely, shared by one of them with a third party and then overheard by the other) and no one ended up maimed or otherwise negatively impacted. This brings us to:

section C: ordinary conversations

1)

Again from book 1. Neville finds out about Norbert and tries to help, no known reaction from Draco

2)

From book 3. Draco was getting ready for his yearly train visit to Harry on the way to Hogwarts and somehow ended up in the general vicinity of Neville.

section D: conclusion

While my first instinct was to assume that the instances of bullying from book 1 would repeat themselves during the following years, it appears that Draco and Neville barely interact with each other from the ages 12 onwards.

Crabbe and Goyle are actually shown to have a more consistently antagonistic relationship with Neville than Draco does: it's them who Neville ends up fighting in book 1 (during Harry's second quidditch match), it's them who laugh when Snape admonishes him in potions in book 3 (immediately post Buckbeak, Draco is present and does not react to Neville) and finally, it's Crabbe who straight up chokes him in book 5 (in the DA vs inquisitorial squad kerfuffle in Umbridge's office).

One can perhaps assume that Draco's bullying continues as the years go on but goes unnoticed by Harry (our POV in the books) but I don't see this happening for one reason and one reason only: this is not what we observe from Neville's interactions with his actual greatest bully: Snape.

The narrative often makes space for Snape's remarks towards Neville (and their effect on him) regardless of plot relevance and they only increase in frequency as the books progress, so much so that in book 3 he is presented as Neville's greatest fear (by way of boggart).

The bullying somewhat plateaus around book 4 (where we can start seeing a shift in how jkr portrays both of them) and Snape and Neville eventually stop interacting completely after book 5, yet we are still presented with a number of interactions between the two that easily dwarfs Draco and Neville's. If Draco was actually a constant negative presence in Neville's life I'd expect to see a similar pattern and yet there is none.

tldr: Neville and Draco have actually very little to do with each other.

As a little treat, here's the only time Lucius Malfoy talks to Neville

Dude didn't have to roast him so hard, but he did.

[shxnlxng]

shen and kirsa, hogwarts during harry potter era AU ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

( @kirsafee​ )

shen is the bumbling hufflepuff, a half-blood with a knack for elemental magic and who’s father comes from a long line of dragon tamers from china. kirsa comes from a pureblood family, and is the first from her family to be sorted into slytherin in a long time. she has a way with charms, and the uncanny ability to make the the little hufflepuff blush with just a few words.

they don’t actually become friends until third year, when shen hears a few of the not-so-nice hufflepuffs in his year murmur some not-so-nice things about kirsa while they’re in potions class. the chamber of secrets had been open, and “she may be from one of the good families, but a slytherin’s a slytherin, right ??”

and shen knows that she’s kirsa fee, and she can take care of herself. but he sees her fist clench and thinks that it won’t help her if she hexes them. so he makes his cauldron explode instead, and smiles sheepishly when he gets detention, but grins brighter when he sees kirsa genuinely laughing at him

they get closer, and it’s an unlikely friendship, at least in the school’s eye. a snake and a badger. but they do get into quite a few hijinks during their years. unsanctioned trips to hogsmeade, late night adventures to the kitchen because shen wants a snack. 

one of the bigger ones is their fifth year, when shen’s family is working the first challenge for the triwizard tournament. it’s another one of their dates, and mushu and cri-kee wink as shen leads kirsa closer to the chinese fireball. it calms at shen’s touch, and they spend a while just petting the creature. until the horntail pitches a fit and they leave before things get bad

she probs asks him to yule ball while they’re there and he blushes and mushu just cackles in the background

FAST FORWARD

they graduate, and shen’s worried that they won’t be a part of each others lives anymore now that they’re not at school

except shen becomes a dragon tamer and kirsa becomes a renowned playwright in the wizarding world as well as the muggle world and she keeps writing plays with dragons

meaning, she requires dragons in her magical plays.

shen keeps having to bring her dragons

this is how they decide to handle things the nerd

EXTRA TIDBITS:

all other eyes may have been on hermione granger at the ball, but shen only had eyes for kirsa. as always, she had him #shOOk

shen’s the only one out of the two of them who gets invited to join dumbledore’s army. but it’s fine cause kirsa is asked to join the inquisitorial squad. they both nope right out of those and go snack together in the kitchens and talk shit about harry potter and umbridge

they both are invited to the slug club the following year, but only ever go to the meetings for the food and to see what other beetle dung slughorn sprouts about wonderful mr. harry potter

they’re both out of hogwarts when the war hits, and neither feel all that inclined to go back. shen because he never was one for fighting, and kirsa because she remains neutral. the order hasn’t done anything for her, and neither has voldemort. instead, shen invites her to china and takes her to all the local spots and shen’s grandma spoils them with fresh made chinese treats. all the char siu bao in the world. they probably ride a dragon at some point

[two-reflections]

I played a fun 40k TTRPG recently and now... I might be going down a small Inquisitorial Acolyte x Skitarius rabbithole. I would say it makes sense in context, but it 100% doesn't this time. It was just like:

Game was lots of fun, but I don't want to give too many details in case the other players find this. 😅 I will say, though, the ship's vibe is, "most useless twunk in the galaxy crushes on adorably sassy genderless cyborg."

...Why do my 40k TTRPG characters always fall in love? This might be surprising, but I'm not usually one for romance in games. However, last time I played DH 2e, my rogue Astartes-like character (long story) fell head over heels for the party Astropath. This only seems to happen to me with 40k and Exalted, for some reason. Something about these settings just makes me go feral. Maybe I want a spot of happiness in my sad peoples' lives before they inevitably die horribly or part ways in tragic circumstances?

I'm slightly annoyed that it's more Imperials. The way I keep getting attached to Imperial characters sometimes makes me wonder if something is wrong with me. I should play a necron game next time, I'm constantly on the edge of falling for them as it is.

I honestly think this fixation will be short-lived, but I might write some smut or something. We'll see.