"you only say you're autistic because you want to feel special and different" actually finding out i was autistic made me feel significantly less special and different. before i was autistic i was Strange and Unpredictable in some sort of Unknowable way which Surely meant i was Predestined for Greatness (like storybook character). now im just some fuckin autistic guy like any other. i significantly prefer it this way btw
7K notes
·
View notes
me: relationships where "nobody understands me like you do" are often romanticized, understandably - most of us yearn for human connection, enjoy being loved and cared for, and want to be special and unique to the people we care about in a way that nobody else is, that is distinctly us and ours - but that's also the most horrifying thing about them. that someone understands you, genuinely and truly knows you as well as you know yourself, and you understand them. that level of intimacy is terrifying. you could use it offer each other things no one else can, but you could also use that knowledge to destroy each other, intentionally or otherwise, and until you start to communicate and establish boundaries that's a significant risk. because when someone knows you like that, you can't be anything but sincere and vulnerable with them, unable to hide anything, and you have to bear the weight of being able to see through them in return. truly knowing someone means accepting that there are parts of them you dislike and/or are just incompatible with and having to come to terms with that and decide if you can live with them anyway. and decide if you can trust someone else with those parts of you. and i would love to see more of that acknowledged.
creator: okay but these characters have matching scars/marks to show they went through something together that nobody else will ever understand. and did i mention they also have feelings for each other?
me:
3K notes
·
View notes
So when are we as a society gonna talk about when q!pac was with richarlyson in prison that one time and asked for a cellphone because thats where the power is? When are we gonna talk about how in purgatory 2 he told gauxnim he was gonna take out his organs and eat them like cell, not to long after making out with him? When are we gonna talk about how q!pac still calls q!cellbit queridinho sometimes? When are we gonna talk about how one of those times was laughing while leaving him stranded on that island, another was when reading the notes on him in the resistance base, and another was when q!cellbit confronted him during purg 2?
162 notes
·
View notes
thinking more about John and.... at the end of HtN when he was interogating Wake, she wanted him to say her name. "i'll be dammed if i pass up the chance to hear you speak the words" and "they're dead words, a human chain reaching back ten thousand years": Awake Remembrance of These Valiant Dead Kia Hua Ko Te Pai Snap Back to Reality Oops There Goes Gravity.
and then she asks him "how did they make you feel?" and of course, John deflects.
but that's Aotearoa's national anthem in te reo Māori. and as we learn in NtN, John is Maori. that's his anthem. how must have that felt, to John? to hear his own anthem claimed by someone descended from the people who left his earth to die?
1K notes
·
View notes
people will post the most raggedy pictures of bob dylan where he looks malnourished unwashed and exhausted and as frail a crumpled piece of paper eyebags the size of minnesota and people will tag it with #<333 she's so beautiful #my specialest old man #so yuri pilled
122 notes
·
View notes
stultifera navis rerun AKA thinking about Iberia hours again because a lot of the Iberians have such fascinating relationships with the concept of home but specifically Thorns and Lumen are eating at my brain. like where do you call home when the place that is your home Just Fucking Hates You? Elysium's rewinding breeze specifically makes a point to hammers home how differently Iberia treats its Liberi and its Aegir
(which is especially interesting since this comes right after a conversation where Purestream commented on how despite Leizi being a high ranking government official, there are still some experiences that are universal for all Yanese people - because the experience of what Iberia itself is like isnt universal for all Iberians)
But all that being said, Thorns also straight up states that Aegir is not his home, and yeah, how could it be? How could a place you've never been to, never truly known, ever be your home? How could it ever feel like a home?
so where do you go when the place that you are from hates your people and the place your people are from is completely unfamiliar and alien to you? Thorns' answer at the end of the conversation with Aya is: my home is where i chose it to be. my home is where there are people I care about and people who care about me
in the complete opposite direction, Lumen's oprec asks: why do you still stay in a place that wants you gone? because the people of Gran Faro like Jordi well enough but when push comes to shove, they will want the only Aegir in town gone
and yet, when Rald the messenger offers him a chance to leave Jordi turns him down and when he's forced to escape Gran Faro after the people there literally try to send him to his death (or worse) at the hands of the Inquisitors he keeps trying to go back because like everyone in stultifera navis, Jordi is clinging to his own dreams of a golden age
but the shape of that dream is unique to every character and for Jordi, his dreams are deeply, inseparably bound to the Eye of Iberia, the legacy his parents left behind
and it's this dream of becoming someone great, of bringing about that golden age that his parents devoted their lives to help create that ties Jordi to this nothing town because despite everything, despite the mistrust of the townsfolk and the hostility of the Inquisition and the danger from the ocean, he simply cannot leave it behind
(or, because i personally dislike the official translation,)
"I just see this place as my home"
so yeah. not sure what overall point i was trying to make here i'm just. deeply in love with these stories about chosing what is and isn't your home, of saying you will not call a place your home because it has given you no reason to or saying you consider a place your home even though it has given you every reason not to. deeply unwell about them <3
78 notes
·
View notes
personal pet peeve but I hate when nerevar is depicted as some kind of wholesome himbo because like. my guy was a war general. he literally led a full-scale war against another culture for what are pre religiously charged reasons as well as being a member of a council which included like several experts on magic, war tactics, art, philosophy, engineering etc
like idk I just struggle to find any nerevar believable that isn't a bit smart and also a bit of a horrific war criminal
63 notes
·
View notes