#it is only three episodes in and I remember the season’s ethos so I’m holding out hope that something is going to change on that end

[sarioh]

rio i miss and love you and your analysis posts. what are your thoughts on the clethubs dynamic this season (in anticipation of the new episode tmrw)

hi aleph thank you so much for giving me a green flag to just drop a 1000 word rant about clethubs also sorry i missed the deadline and also sorry about the length. anyways personally i think clethubs is what you get when you put 3 people who are burdened with Remembering in a world where no one else really seems to. like, of course the other players remember and make references to events of the past, but they don’t remember in the way these three do.

to me this is best explained through a breakdown of Trust and how it manifests between each of them indiviudally. etho, especially, is so distrusted by most of the server. he’s a schemer, he has a reputation of being really unreadable and also unpredictable, but if you actually try to understand him it’s really easy to see that he’s actually the most straightforward person alive. he operates purely on debts and repayments. not debts in a trade sense—those are a business transaction and subject to being logically dissected and exploited. but debts in an emotional sense. etho offered grian mercy in limited life because of the diamond sword in episode 1, which grian had forgotten about entirely all the while etho had been biding his time and waiting for a chance to repay it all season.

cleo is the only person on the server who seems to really understand this part of etho, and therefore is the only person who seems to be able to read his true intentions. not only that, but she's the only one who really seems to approach the concept of loyalty in the same way. in the life series, alliances are feeble and fleeting, and for the most past actions hold no bearing in the future. it doesn’t matter what happened 5 episodes ago—if you’re not on my side now, you’re against me. there’s no such thing for cleo—loyalty and betrayal are not just momentary states of being. if you took something dear from me 5 episodes ago, i will never fully allow myself to need you again. even if we're in the final five and our survival depends on each other.

cleo and etho were direct antagonists in the last season and have no reason to trust each other now, but they trust openly despite it because better than most they understand the burden of a debt unpaid, and the burden of remembering in a way that no one else seems to. to them, loyalty isn’t about who you arbitrarily align yourself with, it’s a gesture. it’s “you gave me an extra pair of diamond leggings 3 episodes ago for no reason when you could’ve given it to your allies and now you have no idea that youre in my good books forever.” you can be on opposites ends of a war from someone but if they extend you a moment of mercy, well, how are you supposed to forget that? how are you not supposed to spend the rest of your life repaying that? they both subconsciously keep lists, not just of people they want to kill (like so many other players seem to), but of people who have extended a hand to them in a time where it didn't really make sense to. of gestures that were silently meaningful towards people they care about. "i trust you because bdubs trusted you" etc etc.

it makes so much sense that cleo and etho would both go immediately to becoming sworn allies this season after being bitter enemies in the previous series. because they both understand that there’s no such thing as fleeting alliances, and when they've decided to choose each other, it’s more than just a shared base or a team name—it’s something unshakable. it’s a thousand debts you take turns repaying.

and then theres bdubs, where remembering takes a different form entirely. for him, remembering manifests as shared history. if i chose you before, really chose you, then i’m going to choose you again and again and again. i’m going to hover in your orbit even if you don’t choose me the next time, because you and i both know what we had, even if we’re not supposed to acknowledge it. “that was a different universe, this is a different world. you’re just cleo” but i’m going to spend the rest of the episode hovering longingly by your base anyways. “this is our old thing, if it comes down to it we don’t betray each other” because the loyalty created its roots years ago and has been growing out of control ever since. you ask bdubs where his team is and he shifts uncomfortably and refuses to explicitly call them his allies, insisting that they just showed up around him but he's not really sure.

and just like etho, the other players never fully trust bdubs. he’s fickle with his loyalty and seems to be a split decision away from turning on his friends at any second, but cleo and etho both know that’s not really true either. their trust towards him comes from that Remembering, that fundamental understanding of shared history.

for etho, it’s the push and pull. it’s the knowing that we go so far back that what happens in between never really matters. you got caught in an explosion or a trap that i set in your base? well, good thing we have a hundred more lives to play with so we can just laugh it off like we always do. a stray explosion or a firing squad aren’t an act of betrayal, any more than a mocking comment about your height or a casual threat of violence. and when it really matters, we both know we’d put down our swords.

for cleo, it’s something unshakeable. bdubs, the known traitor of 3rd life, was fiercely protective of her and her alone. so she’s never wary of him the same way anyone else is—she knows that when bdubs really chooses you, then you’re marked for life.

so yeah. clethubs is three guys who share the burden of remembering. and also have some kind of unspoken understanding of each others motives and intentions that no other player seems to have concretely picked up on. but in a way that ultimately just culminates in them acting like freaks around each other and not actually making any direct effort to team mostly because, as usual, etho and bdubs have no idea how to communicate their intentions directly and sincerely like normal people and instead opt to hover in the fringes of each others alliances and make really weird and loaded comments . Anyways

[anxiouspotatorants]

2.03 wasn’t as visceral to me so I didn’t think I’d need to get my thoughts out but now that I’m replaying it in my head it turns out I do:

I’m kind of starting to wonder if the crew are just full on trying to make is uncomfortable with the amount of nudity on screen. Like there was just so much in Cal’s cold open, plus the dealer in the kitchen, that at this point it feels like they’re taunting us or something. But hey at least we got one episode without full Cassie nudity?

I don’t think I’ve ever internalized just when Cal grew up and how that affected his relationship to his sexuality, so it was nice to get that context onscreen. But like, it still doesn’t justify what he’s done as a grown adult. Also I kind of want his wife’s side of things too now, because him and Nate both seem to villify her in their minds.

With those dancing skills Rue should have auditioned for Lexi’s play, just saying it’s a much healthier hobby.

The first meta commentary was nice but it would not have been as strong if not for the fact that it was introducing the «how to get away with drugs» segment. Which was devastatingly good. Like the addiction plotline is by far the strongest part of the show.

Speaking of meta Lexi’s family show?? The way the entire set revealed itself and the look of the show broke down and got this clean cookie cutter behind the scenes look? Lexi is growing to become one of my favourite parts of the show right now.

Was the Cassie ritual funny in a dark way? Yes. Is the actress showing off her great comedy chops? Definitely. Is her plot understandable and made with a clear intention? Yup. Do I wish Cassie took her own advice and stayed the f**k away from Nate, even if it meant a less exciting storyline? Very much.

Elliot was so close to becoming genuinely likeable to me (like the truth or dare friendship montage was sort of cute) but then he decided to flirt with Jules in the weirdest and slightly neggiest way, so when you put that together with the fact that 90% of the reason he’s even here is to be another source of drugs for Rue, you just get a character I like seeing but don’t actually like personally.

It was kind of quiet on Kat’s end this episode so I wonder how her storyline is going to get more screentime. I very much think her plotline is interesting, but it doesn’t look like the show does at the moment?

What is Ashtray doing. Like, yes Cal is an asshole and Ashtray has grown up in a criminal environment but even Fez is trying to get that kid to calm down this violence is just not looking like it’s going to end well.

Speaking of, Cal metaphorically showing his entire ass to Fez, Ashtray and Faye was honestly a chef’s kiss moment. The fact that he gets to be pathetic shows that he’s not unbeatable which makes me hope that Nate isn’t unbeatable either.

I know it probably isn’t the last time we see Ali but please don’t let this be the last time we see Ali we need Ali keep Ali I am once again begging-

Maddy. Sweetheart. Do not let Nathaniel Jacobs into an expensive house you don’t own with a sleeping child that is bound to wake up and become traumatized by whatever happens between the two of you. I know you at least want some closure moment but not here.

Saw the promo for 2.04 and I am once again scared. It kind of looks like next episode is going to be an overdose episode. And Cassie’s party spiral. And apparently a lot of violence. And I genuinely don’t know who or what Rue is declaring her love to.

[stevenuniversallyreviews]

Episode 101: Earthlings

“Earth is a prison.”

Beta was a difficult episode to write about on its own, because it’s the first half of a story without the resolution. Earthlings makes up for it by being the most definitive resolution in the series until Change Your Mind.

It might seem odd to choose such a negative header quote for such a positive episode, but Jasper’s baggage is responsible for the culmination of four, count ‘em, four Act II (Seasons 2-3) character arcs. And her response to Peridot’s earnest defense of the planet begins a final speech that sets the tone for Act III (Seasons 4-5). Love her or hate her, Jasper is the most important character in this story, and even though things go great for our three heroes, her story is a tragedy.

I’m not here to say that Jasper is just misunderstood, because she remains monstrous at the start of Earthlings, taunting her Corrupted prisoners and going further than ever to extol her hatred of weaker Gems. But at last, her bullying attitude is given an ethos: it’s been clear from the start that she’s a classic believer in Might Makes Right and a loyal Homeworlder, but watching her explain the values behind these virtues is both disturbing and illuminating. Bismuth, the most hardcore Crystal Gem soldier we’ve seen, radically defends the ability for Gems to choose their own paths. So it holds that Jasper, the most hardcore Homeworld soldier we’ve seen, believes the exact opposite with equal fervor.

Jasper is a bigot, and like all bigots she believes her views are backed by “facts” about the worth of other lives relative to her own. Unlike humans, Gems are made for specific purposes, so there’s slightly more merit to her beliefs than those of real world bigots. But like humans, Gems are capable of free will, and by imposing the oppressive power structure of Homeworld, Jasper becomes the ideal nemesis for characters whose identity crises are the result of this oppression. Meaning all of the Crystal Gems, really, but specifically Amethyst and Peridot given Jasper’s focus on physicality.

Still, for all the work done to set Jasper and Amethyst up as rivals, we should take a step back and remember that Amethyst cares way more about Jasper than vice versa. The lopsided fight means everything to our scrappy Crystal Gem, and Jasper indulges and belittles her from time to time, but it’s clear that she has another Gem on her mind, and it isn’t Peridot.

It’s a fascinating choice (and the right one, because otherwise the episode’s focus is right out the window) to have Lapis Lazuli sit this fight out, considering she’s the reason any of this is happening. Jasper’s arc has almost nothing to do with Amethyst: it’s about an emotionally stunted savant who has no idea how to handle a bad breakup, and doubles down on the one thing she does well instead of seeking alternative solutions. Unfortunately for all involved, Jasper’s single area of expertise is violence.

Our first impression of Jasper is a brutal Gem who looks down on fusion, but decides to fuse the second the going gets tough. She’s prideful, but cares more about winning than her pride, so she takes a pragmatic approach to besting the Crystal Gems after losing a fight to a fusion. However, Malachite only brings Jasper more misery, and not just because her abuse of Lapis is soon met in kind: that taste of power is stripped from her, then her ex rejects her, and now she’s wandering her home planet, a planet she despises, alone. She could have ruled the oceans forever, but instead she’s stuck in the desert where she was born.

The tragedy of Jasper is that she tried to branch out and explore something that we know is good, but she did it for the wrong reasons, it didn’t work, and it kills the small part of her that was willing to look beyond her myopic worldview. Here she becomes desperate enough to fuse with a monster, and even the monster rejects her, and the only thing she has left is her convictions. And at her lowest point, in the face of her own demise, she refuses to betray them again. She said from the beginning that she respected Rose’s tactics, but now we know she’ll never accept her help, and is too stubborn to fathom that a Gem could be so capable of transformation that Steven is a different person. So Jasper loses her mind, and it never would have happened if she’d been able to change it instead.

It’s fitting, then, that the three Gems she faces are the ones who have transformed the most over the course of the series: Steven and Peridot through character growth, and Amethyst as the character who has literally transformed more than anyone else.

The end of Jasper’s arc is tragic, but the end of Amethyst’s is triumphant. The mismatched battle between Amethyst and Jasper is tough to watch, but important: so many kid’s shows have heroes who beat impossible odds through sheer willpower, and while it’s a great message to try your best, it doesn’t account for the fights we can’t win. If the media you consume keeps telling you that you can do anything if you try hard enough, some part of you is gonna blame yourself for not doing the impossible when you meet impossible challenges in real life. Amethyst’s arc was never about beating Jasper alone: it’s about accepting that her inability to beat Jasper alone doesn’t make her any less wonderful. It’s okay to be vulnerable and rely on your friends and family when the going gets tough, and that’s exactly what saves the day.

It’s a hell of a thing for the culmination of a character arc to be a new fusion, but what better way to show that Amethyst has accepted teamwork again? Smoky Quartz is the perfect design of a fusion made from two friends who are finally okay with their flaws: their brown mop of hair clashes with their skin color, and they have that gross extra forearm instead of the symmetrical bonus limbs we’re used to, but they’re just so pumped to be here. Their theme is a jubilant blend of Steven’s chiptunes and Amethyst’s drumkit, and Natasha Lyonne, herself no stranger to turmoil, imbues just a hint of her typically snarky delivery (see: Orange is the New Black, Russian Doll) to make Smoky a goofball with an edge. They aren’t bubbly because they’re naive or stupid, they’re bubbly because they’re on the other side of a tumultuous personal struggle.

We once again get a clever-as-hell fusion of our heroes’ weapons, combining Amethyst’s whip and Steven’s shield to make a yoyo. And while they do best Jasper in a fight, the more important thing is that they’re having fun instead of obsessing over a jerk. They crack puns, they cheer themselves on, and they even let dramatic developments like Jasper’s fusion with a Corrupted Gem slide right off. Yes, Amethyst is technically winning a fight in an arc about how it’s okay that she’s not gonna win the fight, but she does it with Steven, and even though we see her bubble a Gem’s gem for the first time, she doesn’t earn the final blow.

Peridot may have hit a major milestone in her character development upon joining the Crystal Gems, but if we’re talking about the story of her becoming an earthling, this is the actual culmination. As with her encounter with Yellow Diamond, she shines when contrasted with a former superior, standing up for herself and her adopted home when it matters most. She’s still a ham, spending most of the episode struggling to show off her metal powers, but her signature hubris is now tempered with a healthier form of self-confidence: she doesn’t hesitate to defend her dignity or lifestyle, and beautifully ends an arc that began by thanking Steven all the way back in When It Rains with a simple “You’re welcome!”

So Jasper’s arc, Amethyst’s arc, and Peridot’s arc all come to a close at the same time. Who are we missing...

Oh right.

This may not be the finale, but it’s the climax of Steven’s Act II character arc, meaning it’s the end of an era for the series that shares his name. There are many ways to read our lead protagonist’s character development for the original show’s three acts, but I see it as a sort of hierarchy of needs: from the beginning, he needs to become a Crystal Gem, live up to his mother’s legacy, and become a hero in his own right, and at the end of every act he checks off one of these goals. He correctly declares himself a true Crystal Gem at the end of Act I, and manages to find himself after his connection with Rose is forever changed in Act III, but Act II is a less obvious story about where he’s going in life, because his life is relatively stable throughout the second and third seasons. It’s everyone else whose lives are in flux: the other Crystal Gems have clear stages of growth and the Week of Sardonyx to deal with, Peridot and Lapis switch sides, Connie becomes a sword fighter, even Greg gains comical wealth, but Steven seems to stick to the status quo. 

I mentioned it in Steven vs. Amethyst, but it bears repeating that this act begins with Steven baring his heart and saying he’s not sure whether or not he’s his mom, and ends with him baring his heart and saying definitively that he’s not Rose Quartz, a sentiment he repeats here. The first two acts are about Steven trying to fill the void his mother left behind, but this goal shifts as he learns additional information. He’s uncertain in Act I because he knows very little about her, so he’s just trying to be a Crystal Gem. He then learns she was an alien invader who chose to protect Earth instead, so he spends Act II trying to live up to this expectation. The two stories may seem similar, especially compared to how different things are upon hearing that Rose shattered Pink Diamond, but I think the distinction is most easily found in the midpoint of each act.

Midway through Act I, Steven gains his mother’s healing abilities, learns that the Gems are aliens with opposing sides, and immediately loses his mother’s healing abilities. He’s in over his head, sporadic with the skills he inherited from Rose and clueless about her origins. Midway through Act II, Steven recruits a new ally, saves the planet from a Homeworld weapon, and immediately recruits another ally. He knows now that Rose was a defender of Earth and a friend to all outcast Gems, and is choosing to continue these traditions.

Act II is the part of the story where Steven helplessly watches the Crystal Gems struggle through a serious personal rift, then learns to help each of them overcome their inner demons. He mediates, he inspires, and he grows his “army” by being a good friend to Connie, Peridot, and Lapis. Unlike Act I, he’s competently and intentionally following the footsteps of the Rose we’ve heard about for the entire series. But still, he questions his worthiness.

Steven’s second arc ends with him helping Amethyst, but failing to help Jasper, and it’s just the sort of bittersweet victory that fits a story about trying to personify an idealistic version of a flawed figure. He gets a lot of things right, and looking up to the concept of a perfect Rose is responsible for a lot of good in his life, but it also leads to self-doubt when he can’t possibly live up to this illusion of a standard. And when he tries to keep fulfilling that legacy by using her healing powers to help Jasper, Rose’s other legacy is what gets in his way. Jasper gets a tragedy, Amethyst and Peridot get triumphs, but Steven gets something in the middle: he wins the day, and he becomes stronger in the real way over the course of two seasons, but he fails to become just like Rose because not even Rose was just like the Rose he thought he knew.

For all its resolutions, Earthlings is still an episode that sets the table for a finale that opens a floodgate instead of closing the door. We see the crest of the Diamond Authority more clearly than ever as Jasper exposits about the intended purpose of Gems, and given the slow trickle of lore we’ve gotten so far, this could’ve been it. But then, after a bevy of hints throughout the series that something is up with the diamond on the bottom of the crest, we finally hear Pink Diamond’s name.

That story is about to get a lot more complicated, and I appreciate that we aren’t teased about what Rose did to her Diamond for long. But thanks to Kimberly Brooks (who kills it in an episode that gives her plenty to do), this inherently compelling name drop is given additional weight by the anguish in Jasper’s voice. We’ve seen her down before, and she sounds more defeated than ever when bemoaning her bad luck with fusion partners, but Jasper’s last words are a chilling blend of her signature rage with despair. This is someone bent on Gems fulfilling their intended purpose, and thousands of years later, she’s still devastated that she couldn’t fulfill her own. She wasn’t just made to fight, she was made to win a single war, and she lost.

The table is also set by another cliffhanger, because this may be the end for four huge stories all at once, but it’s not the end of Act II. Strap in, folks, it’s time for Steven’s third arc to begin.

Future Vision!

I mean, it’s a short turnaround, but Eyeball had better get used to being bubbled alive.

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

Keeping It Together just got back into the top list, and back down it goes. Sorry! But Earthlings is an incredible all-around episode. Terrific character work that coincides with terrific big picture storytelling, lore galore, great music, great action, a new fusion, and a tentative sense that everything’s gonna be alright that leaves us nice and warm until the other shoe drops. The scary thing is that this would be even higher if it and Beta were aired as a single entity.

Top Twenty

Steven and the Stevens

Hit the Diamond

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

The Return

Jailbreak

The Answer

Sworn to the Sword

Rose’s Scabbard

Earthlings

Mr. Greg

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Beach City Drift

Winter Forecast

Bismuth

When It Rains

Catch and Release

Chille Tid

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Ocean Gem

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

Warp Tour

The Test

Future Vision

On the Run

Maximum Capacity

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

Keeping It Together

We Need to Talk

Cry for Help

Keystone Motel

Back to the Barn

Steven’s Birthday

It Could’ve Been Great

Message Received

Log Date 7 15 2

Same Old World

The New Lars

Monster Reunion

Alone at Sea

Crack the Whip

Beta

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Reformed

Rising Tides, Crashing Tides

Onion Friend

Historical Friction

Friend Ship

Nightmare Hospital

Too Far

Barn Mates

Steven Floats

Drop Beat Dad

Too Short to Ride

Restaurant Wars

Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service

Greg the Babysitter

Gem Hunt

Steven vs. Amethyst

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

Super Watermelon Island

Gem Drill

No Thanks!

     5. Horror Club      4. Fusion Cuisine      3. House Guest      2. Sadie’s Song      1. Island Adventure

(No promo art for this second half of an episode, so instead we’ll go with HeavenSevenEleven’s gorgeous depiction of Jasper. Not used to that much color up there!)

[izzyovercoffee]

So, I might be severely overthinking this, but the fact Sabine seems to be using the darksaber in full-power mode even when sparring (since the colour and sound is the same, and Kanan's using his saber on full power against it) seems to imply it doesn't have a training blade mode? If so, do you think it was always like this, or if some idiot for clan Viszla got rid of the low power mode for symbolic purposes? Or does this say something about Tarre Viszla? Sorry if this isn't coherent.

I’m gonna be honest — I don’t have a particularly good excuse for how long it took me to get to this question. If it helps, I’ve been thinking about it on and off very seriously for … well, a while, and I feel like there’s multiple answers, or many layers to the answer, for this question—all kind of contingent on how you understand lightsabers and lightsaber construction, and mandalorian ethos.

Ultimately, I put forward the idea that it says something about Tar(re) Vizsla — something, specifically about who he is as a person, and how he had to navigate two worlds at once (the Jedi, and the Mandalorians) — and how even though he did, arguably, successfully navigate both worlds, he was still very firmly a mandalorian just as much as he was Jedi.

We’ll start first with lightsabers, and move on to mandalorian ethos.

Lightsabers and Training Blades

So, as it was often written in the companion novels for the Prequel Trilogy, lightsabers come in multiple … intensities. They have a low-power setting and a high-power setting, and some, but not all, lightsabers also have a training setting.

That is, a blade that is intense enough to deliver soft-to-very-serious burns, but not intense enough to cut through skin. Generally, younglings in the temple were given training sabers to use during martial training. 

It’s been a while since I’ve seen The Clone Wars in its entirety, but from what I remember that was, generally, the same thing.

And, also, that is the main reason why building your own personal saber is part of the official process / ritual of entering into the role of padawan. Like other cultures coming-of-age rites, this rite of passage is meant to illustrate a grasp of different routes of education in what’s considered essential to a Jedi (a grasp of electronics, engineering, and careful control of the Force and following the Force’s guidance). 

The practical portion of this ritual of creating a personal lightsaber, however, is that the training saber can be returned to the temple—and, also, that a training saber that cannot cut is of little to no use to a Jedi, padawan or otherwise. 

Ultimately, as I’ve understood it, once a person enters padawan-ship, there’s an implicit acknowledgment that an individual is old enough, or mature enough, to be allowed to handle a weapon that can cause serious injury (or death). 

Of course, that doesn’t mean lightsabers with training settings might not exist—they might. But the creation of the lightsaber is a rite of passage in and of itself.

Which leads me to the next part.

Mandalorian Ethos

Now, as we understand Tar Vizsla, and as he’s been spoken about in canon and companion materials, the fact is that Tar Vizsla was both a mandalorian and a jedi. And that his lightsaber construction involved both his experiences as a Jedi, and his heritage as a mandalorian. 

“…. it is a different kind of sword. It’s not that it’s necessarily more powerful than any other lightsaber — in fact, you can make a strong argument that it’s not. It’s an old, old, old lightsaber. For all I know, it has limitations. It’s obviously not a style that’s been replicated, and you can imagine that’s because Tar Vizsla understood something and added a Mandalorian twist to it that no one’s been able to replicate since. It’s a flat blade of energy, which is bizarre.”

—Dave Filoni, in an interview about SW Rebels, Season Three

This has been pretty much, more-or-less, confirmed in the above quote of course, but I do want to address it.

I’ve spoken at length about how Tar’s mandalorian cultural heritage affected the color of the blade, and that likely is the very reason why it’s the first and last lightsaber created with a black blade — as the color of the saber itself is deeply affected by the person who wielded the blade, and it’s very first activation determines the blades’ color.

The only black lightsaber created by the only (or the first of very, very few) mandalorian jedi, is not an accident — as black, to mandalorians, is the color of justice. But also, like the color itself, the blade of the darksaber is unique in its shape: flat, tapered to a point, shaped more like an actual katana than any other lightsaber in existence. 

But another thing I haven’t touched on is what’s said during that training episode with Sabine, and what Kanan says as well. It is the connection between the crystal and the wielder of the saber that also effects its strength. 

The darksaber drew on Sabine, just as Sabine drew on the saber. There’s a give and a take, a flow of energy, between them in combat. 

That is part of the reason why “only” Force users can “really” wield lightsabers efficiently. And, that is partly where the strength, or the intensity, of the saber comes from. 

And Mandalorian ethos comes in here, in that the approach to weapons that the Jedi take (especially to their own weapon) as compared to mandalorians is very, very different — and that matters, I think. Especially when it comes to the darksaber.

Jedi, when they view their lightsabers, they call it a “tool,” as opposed to a weapon. By referring to it, seeing it, naming it a tool, it’s meant to represent that Jedi are not martial, or violent, by nature. Whether that actually has any weight, I’ll leave for another discussion.

Mandalorians, contrary to Jedi, don’t look at knives, or swords, or blades, and refer to them as tools — they name them for what they are: weapons. Knives, blades, swords, and so on. 

The difference between the two is that there’s a very healthy respect for the danger and the weight of that danger inherent in carrying a weapon — as opposed to an outright denial of danger in calling the lightsaber a tool, and thus a lack of acknowledgement (or a lack of respect) for its alternative purpose.

This isn’t to say that Jedi don’t have sense or respect for the danger of a lightsaber, but if they cannot name a lightsaber as a weapon even when one of its main uses is as a weapon, however defensively and non-lethally, then there’s an entirely different understanding of what one wants a lightsaber to be, and how one views themselves and the power they wield as a person who wields not just a lightsaber but also the Force.

And Tar … comes from a Mandalorian heritage. In much the same way that his heritage defines the color of the blade, and the shape of the blade of energy as much as its handle, so does it define how the darksaber defines itself as its core. A sword is a tool, but a sword is first and foremost a weapon, and one cannot wield a sword safely without first understanding that it is a weapon—and that no attempt to distract away from its nature will ever change what it truly is.

And so, if it were even possible for some lightsabers to be toned down from high to low to training intensity, the darksaber, itself, cannot be — can never be.

Because Tar saw what the Jedi could not accept when he called on his heritage, what he understood intimately from mandalorian forging, and mandalorian bladework, and that he brought forward in the forging of the darksaber—in the forging of the first and last saber of its kind.

Tar understood that the most important possession of the Jedi was first and foremost a weapon before it was a tool; and it was because of that understanding that the darksaber could not be toned down in intensity. 

And if you watch the scene where Sabine is training with Kanan closely, as she becomes more heated, more passionate, more emotional, her connection with the darksaber improves, and she fights stronger, better, faster. 

I just want to firmly draw a line here and say that I am not implying that mandalorians are inherently darksided—rather, in the culture, in the people, attachment is something that holds the highest priority. Connections with family, friends, loved ones—connections with one’s self and one’s emotions. I just want to not-so-gently suggest that Tar’s saber is better attuned to someone who comes from a mandalorian background, than someone who does not. 

Yes, anyone can potentially use the darksaber, but it’s not meant to be used by just anyone, and it cannot be used to its fullest potential by just anyone.

[jessicakehoe]

Meet the Vancouver-based Designer Crafting Looks for Canada’s Drag Race Contestant Ilona Verley

For those who’ve been following Canada’s Drag Race and wonder who’s behind the dramatic look worn by contestant Ilona Verley in the show’s promo images, Evan Clayton is your name to know. The Vancouver-based creative–who graduated from the city’s Blanche Macdonald Centre and launched his label in 2013–has dressed more of the country’s other beloved queens including Tynomi Banks and Juice Boxx, and his designs have appeared on other Drag Race darlings like Naomi Smalls, and performers like Jessie Reyez and Kali Uchis. FASHION caught up with Clayton to talk about his work with the drag community, the philosophy behind his eponymous brand, and where he finds inspiration.

Tell me about your path to becoming a designer; was it something you always dreamed of doing?

I was definitely a very creative child and had a love for fashion. I read many magazines, and started thinking about having a career in fashion when I was maybe 13 or 14. But I was torn because all the way through high school, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to get into fashion or into science and go to school for marine biology. When it came time to decide what path to take, I thought to myself, Blanche is my dream school, and if I don’t get in, I’ll go to school for marine biology. I graduated from Blanche’s fashion design program in 2011 and started my line in 2013; I’ve been showing consistently since then, with this season being my 15th collection.

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💚🐆 LIFE'S A BITCH, NOW SO AM I 🐆💚 . 📷: @sequoiaemmanuelle / Assist: @ozzie__g__ 👸🏿: @shaebutters Styling: @melvinstyles 💇🏿: @ricardoferrise1 💄: @rosharofficial . . . . . #fashion #leopard #leopardprint #chaps #beret #accessories #ootd #editorial #editorialfashion #lookbook

A post shared by Evan Clayton (@evanclayton) on Jan 21, 2020 at 9:27am PST

It’s interesting that you say you were into science–a lot of designers I speak to tell me they were studying or working in that field before getting into fashion. How do those two worlds intersect?

I think there is a lot of science and math in what I do. When I’m not sewing, I’m drafting, and drafting is all math. And I find myself very inspired by nature. Maybe it’s cliché to say, but this idea of ‘nature is the greatest designer’–it’s true!

Aside from nature, tell me about your other influences. How did you start working with the drag community, and how does that world of design factor into your creative process and other work?

I’ve always been a very theatrical person; all through high school I was in drama. I remember the very first time I saw drag–it was before Drag Race was the cultural phenomenon it is today. I was channel surfing and saw the season one episode when Ongina came out as HIV positive. That was the first time I’d ever seen a queer person represented on TV when they weren’t the butt end of a joke, or it wasn’t the notion of having a tragic storyline just for the sake of having one. Seeing that, and seeing these people who media had shown me all my life as a joke as being an actual creative force and having talent and heart and beauty, that started to foster my love for drag.

Moving to Vancouver, my social life was the drag scene. All my closest friends are drag artists, or work with them. I’ve been putting drag queens in my runway shows since 2014; and it’s snowballed from there, from being a fun thing in my shows to making a career in making costumes for drag artists both locally and internally. It keeps building, and now that Drag Race has come to Canada, it’s going to keep expanding. The Canadian drag community is so small, especially compared to the States. I knew half of the cast on Canada’s Drag Race!

In terms of designing for drag artists for a stage show versus television or runway, how are those processes different?

It’s quite different, and it depends on the individual artist as well. Something I make for the runway isn’t going to necessarily work for stage–there are a lot technical aspects to making clothes for drag. There are a lot of elements to be mindful of: nylons; are they going to be wearing a breastplate?; are they going to be wearing a corset or padding?; what wig are they wearing? If they’re not wearing a human hair wig, they probably can’t wear sequins. There’s a lot of things to juggle when you’re designing stage costumes, whereas on the runway, if they’re just going to be walking for 40 seconds and then wearing it backstage, it’s more chill.

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❄💎 ICE COLD HEART 💎❄ . @ilonaverley in a custom cartridge pleated brocade gown, paired with a thermoplastic armored bust and swordtip glove for @canadasdragrace. . THE CAT IS OUT OF THE BAG! Ilona is a contestant on the inaugural season of Drag Race Canada! I've been lucky enough to work with this talented queen on a few looks, but to have her trust me with the first look the world gets to see her in is a true honor, and one I can't thank her enough for. I wanted to portray her in powder blue, her signature color, but in a tough as nails armored look to match her badass persona. Regal, yet stern. She has a fucking message, and I can't WAIT to watch her share it with the world! . 📷: @mattbarnesphoto 🔪: @littlejohnnyr 💎: @ampedaccessories . . . . #fashion #drag #dragqueen #ilona #ilonaverley #dragrace #dragracecanada #canadasdragrace #brocade #armor #armour #sword #glove

A post shared by Evan Clayton (@evanclayton) on May 14, 2020 at 9:11am PDT

Is there an outfit from Drag Race Canada that you’re particularly proud of, perhaps because it presented a conceptual challenge?

There are two in particular that I know made it on to the show. The first is Ilona’s promo look, the powder blue armour set; that wasn’t a conceptual challenge because I’d based it on some looks I’d done from a few seasons past, but it was a challenge in terms of construction because we only had three days to complete it.

Another piece I’m proud of is on next week’s episode–it’s a look that we did based on a runway look that I did a few years ago; I feel that’s authentically me and it’s a good representation of who I am as a designer.

Let’s talk about style and self-expression. How do all the influences you have get distilled into your creations?

At the very core of the ethos of the brand, and also me as a person, is honesty. If a design doesn’t feel right for me and for the performer, I’m not going to do it. I’ll find a way to make it right. And that extends to my runway shows–I’m not trying to paint a delusion, and I’m not trying to create a fictional reality–the pieces I make are a very honest representation of who I am as a person and what my morals and ethics are. And I think that especially in drag, and in Vancouver drag, that’s a very visual thing. You look at the drag troupe, The Darlings; I just dressed them for a collaboration they did with the Vancouver Symphony Orchestra. I had to sit down and say, “What story are you trying to tell and how can my voice add to it?” If it doesn’t add anything, then why are you including my voice?

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🌊 LOVE IN THE DARK 🌊 . @jessiereyez in a custom aquamarine tulle gown for the LOVE IN THE DARK music video. . 📷: @gregorygoudreau 📹: @se.oh_ Produced by @mad.ruk Styling: @steph__major . . . . #jessiereyez #fashion #underwaterphotography #underwater #tulle #gown #ootd #style #musicvideo #editorial #loveinthedark

A post shared by Evan Clayton (@evanclayton) on Jan 23, 2020 at 3:23pm PST

In terms of your approach as a designer, are you interested in the traditional fashion model of doing runway shows and several seasons of collections a year? Or are you happy doing your own thing?

My business has always been a bit of an odd duck; I’ve never really fit into the wholesale market because of budget. I was doing so much custom work, that was really the driving monetary force behind my brand. I was doing runway shows because I love them, not because I felt like I had to.

My runway shows are a kind of therapy for me; you can look at a specific show and you can see where my mindset was at the time I was creating that collection. I did a collection a few years ago where I wanted to focus on ready-to-wear for wholesale, and then have a few dramatic pieces at the end. What I learned from that show was that nobody cared about the wholesale pieces–only the fun pieces. That was kind of the nail in the coffin for me trying to fit into the fashion system.

I actually had a runway show planned that was going to happen last week but it obviously didn’t because of COVID; we’d been planning it since November, and then I had to pull the plug on it. I thought, do I show this in another format? Do I do a video? Do I just do a photoshoot? I’m just going to hold on to it until I can release it in a way I see fit, because I have a whole experience planned for it that extends a bit past the runway. I’ll be very patient about it until we can gather in numbers greater than 50. 

You’ve mentioned how meaningful seeing Drag Race for the first time, and now being part of the show, was for you. What are you hopeful for coming out of 2020 in terms of inclusion, representation, and other similar issues that have really been brought to the forefront recently?

I’m very hopeful to see more inclusion, not just on Drag Race but in media in general. It’s so amazing that Ilona was cast on Canada’s Drag Race as an Indigenous trans two-spirit person who’s very open about her status as exactly that; and she’s not afraid of sharing the struggles and letting people know what is happening in those communities. I think [the show] has done a good job of representing these stories. I remember watching Anastarzia [Anaquway]’s story about her upbringing, and coming to Canada and seeking asylum, and becoming the star she is today. That’s really inspiring and something I’d love to see continued not just in future seasons of Drag Race Canada–I think in Canadian media, we’ve always been a bit ahead of the curve in terms of showing diverse communities–but I’d love to see it extend to the American version as well; that’s the big money-maker, and I don’t think putting Gia Gunn in a season of All-Stars is going to quench the fire of Ru Paul saying he’d never cast a trans person on Drag Race. It’s not the same thing as casting an undiscovered trans talent that deserves to be on the show.

The post Meet the Vancouver-based Designer Crafting Looks for <em>Canada’s Drag Race</em> Contestant Ilona Verley appeared first on FASHION Magazine.

Meet the Vancouver-based Designer Crafting Looks for Canada’s Drag Race Contestant Ilona Verley published first on https://borboletabags.tumblr.com/

[thegoing-gayhoax-blog]

“Ars Ratio” Reflection (Second Draft)

Kara Ireland

WRIT 3160

Reflection

 What's in my portfolio? In my portfolio are various modes of the depiction of how the myth of going gay functions in society. I've compiled a series of gifs, pictures, and scenes from various shows. These shows include MTV’s Faking It, ABC’s Glee, FOX’s Scream Queens, and Freeform’s The Bold Type. My argumentative piece follows these depictions. I used MTV’s Faking It pilot episode as my main source of scrutiny. I listed numerous discrepancies I had with the show. Mainly, I wanted to highlight how damaging the very first portrayal of lesbians on mainstream television since The L Word was. It was revolutionary for me because I was struggling with my own sexuality at the age of fifteen. Seeing two women in a same sex relationship at any stretch was good exposure for me, it increased my sense of normalcy. It wasn't until I got older, got more experience, and a wider world view that I began to see how awful the show’s premise was. My argumentative paper ventures into how I felt it missed the mark. I then have a comedy skit that will be supposedly performed at Atlanta’s Gay Pride. This original piece is modeled after the kind of comedy I'd seen at my own experience at Pride 2017. Most of the comedy was made at the expense of heterosexual people. In a safe environment full of people who have had similar experiences, it was okay to poke fun at the majority. The skit touches on inappropriate touching, unrequited crushes, and personal experience with girls supposedly going gay. It addresses some of the bothersome situations lesbians often run into in a lighthearted way.

My third argument was a series of tweets I’d composed in response to real-life depictions of “going gay.” I searched buzz words on twitter, such as “be gay, go gay, try girls” etc. to reply to. Though confined to 140 characters – even less, because of the handle, I felt that I’d used Aristotelian appeals accurately to challenge their beliefs.

 The gif set from The Bold Type contrasts the problematic tropes shown in both Faking It and Glee. It supports a stereotype, then dismantles it. In the first gif set, Kat is shown identifying with the lesbian experience, but saying that she didn't think she could get past “all this” referencing to the female anatomy. The lesbian character of the show, Adena, countered her statement with “it's not about all this. It's about this” in reference to her heart and emotion regarding a person.

 I believe this is relevant to my discussion because Kat admitted that the sexual nature of their budding relationship was offputting, as she did not identify as a lesbian. She was merely exploring her sexuality, and she'd done so by kissing Adena. They hadn't gone further, and she didn't think she could pursue a relationship because of the sexual barrier that existed between them. Adena validated it, but also said that it wasn't about the body. Being in a relationship transcended sex and the parts involved. It rested solely on the heart and the emotion surrounding the couple that determined it's sustenance. This was the point I was trying to convey, myself through my argumentative paper. Too many people believe that “going gay” is about sex, when it is only a mere part of the exploratory experience. To truly give oneself to a same sex relationship, it needs more substance than an attraction and willingness to explore. The Bold Type executed this well.

 ABC’s Glee enacted several stereotypical tropes about lesbians and gays throughout their series, but it was mostly for educational purposes to highlight and identify bigotry. Nevertheless, the openly lesbian character, Santana, was made out to be predatory in several instances. Quinn was one of her best friends, and they eventually had sex together. The scene where it happened was on prom night, when they were both single and feeling lonely. Alcohol was featured heavily in the episode. It implied that intoxication can make someone “go gay”. Quinn then emphasized the fact that she'd never slow danced with a girl before, and Santana smirked at her. This is the predatory lesbian fallacy being portrayed. The scene then cut from Santana leading her away by the hand from the party to a suggestive morning after scene. Additionally, with prior knowledge from the season, Quinn had gone through a rebellious bad girl phase, and this was amongst the last things she did. It was never explicitly said that this was part of her regime, but it can be interpreted that way.

 FOX’s Scream Queens was a satirical show that was made to offend people in the masses. There was no stroke to identify why the quotes were problematic, but it was understood by most that it was satire. There was one butch lesbian on the show, who was one of the first killed during a serial killing. She was dubbed Predatory Lez immediately, and we never learned her real name. In her brief duration, she developed a superficial relationship with Chanel #3 based on lewd jokes. Naming a character Predatory Lez does not help the view that lesbians really are predatory and infringe on boundaries. Viewers never got insight on the intricacies of their peculiar relationship, but at one point, Chanel #3 begs the killer not to kill her because she was “sort of gay now too”. Beyond the implication that a few kisses and explicit jokes made between one another changed someone's sexuality, it was also used as a discriminatory saving grace. She partially identified as a member of the LGBT community to be pardoned. She denied it later. This abrupt change makes it hard for people to come out. Though the show is based on satire, it does have parallels to real, ignorant people that think this way.

   Through this class, I have discovered that argument transcends pro and con. Essentially, everything is an argument. Commercials, designs, font choice, music, inflection, gesture, clothing, hairstyle – everything has the potential to be an argument. Anything can be designed to persuade. After analyzing various shows, I began to consider them differently. Words are not the only mode of argument because everything has the power to make a statement.

 I have learned that the color scheme of a product or an advertisement serves to persuade someone, years prior. Since being in this class, I have learned that the mere existence of the product is an argument within itself. The product serves an argumentative purpose initially. It was difficult to wrap my mind around, but throughout the semester, my mindset has been malleable. It has increasingly made more sense. In reading Heinrichs, mostly, I was offered several new perspectives through relatable material. I would like to thank you, Dr. Harris, for assigning such a book – rather than a text that is purely academic. It was much easier to read and retain. By reading Heinrichs, it has become more apparent to me that argument lives in everything.

 The philosophy of argument and writing is something I’m not entirely well-versed in. I understood it minimally when I came in, and I still have a tentative hold on it now. When I was a junior in high school I learned for the first time what ethos pathos and logos were. At Chamblee, Coach Smith taught it to us. It’s funny because we never even did anything with that information. I think we might’ve had one project or assignment that incorporated it, then I put it on the backburner. We learned the basics. When I came into WRIT 3160 three years later, I didn’t know what to expect. I didn’t plan on delving into Aristotelian appeals because I didn’t know about them and truthfully, I didn’t care about that stuff. For every argument I’ve made in the past, every persuasive paper, it was solely the rights and wrongs and do’s and don’ts. It was all pros and cons. Never once did I think that my delivery itself was part of the argument, that my rhetoric was just as influential as my facts.

 I didn’t care about the technicalities of argument. I didn’t care about the impact of pathos, logos, and ethos in real life situations. It was fascinating to discover that they’re all around us all the time. Reading Heinrichs was tedious for me at times because even though he made it relatable, I still couldn’t get engaged. This class was good nevertheless because it kept me writing when I didn’t want to and often times I resented the fact. As a writer and an author, I needed that push. This can now be used in my books, because my communication can be stronger.

 The concept of rhetoric is still somewhat lost on me, just because it encompasses so much. I would not say that I’m an expert, nor that I could effectively explain it to someone new. It’s still confusing for me, but this class has offered a little clarity. Assigning a weekly riff and response forced me to read for comprehension. I would skim Heinrichs, then have to go back and read it over again because the meaning was lost on me. Because rhetoric is all new to me, it was hard to absorb and apply the information. However, creating a riff and understanding how an author initially wrote their piece turned out to be the key to comprehension for me. This was an incredibly original recurring assignment. You forced us to read for interpretation, and you can’t effectively interpret something that you don’t understand. The riff and response held me accountable for my reading. Without it, I very well may have skipped the readings altogether because being introduced to new topics I haven’t had any prior knowledge about intimidates me, and I just opt out of participating. The riff was easier to produce than the response, for me.

           I learned about syllogism and can decipher it when it happens. I have noticed that people use syllogism incorrectly, more often than not. The most recent one I can remember hearing and identifying was on the premise of who can say the N word and who can’t. Essentially, the argument was: Black people are people of color. People of color say the N word. Mexicans are not black, but they are still people of color, therefore they can say the N word. People were using this syllogism to defend their right to say a word that didn’t pertain to them. I’ve also been noticing fallacies since being exposed to the different types.

Since discovering the intricacies of rhetoric, I have subconsciously been noticing and labeling certain moves as such. I’ve been decoding people’s decorum and spotting disingenuous advances. I’ve seen it a lot at work with my managers, the difference between their interactions with the customers at Target and their interactions in the break room. I can identify more deadly fallacies when I speak to people. The main ones my counterparts fall victim to are tautology, slippery slope, and the red herring. They love to change the subject. I’ve seen all of the Aristotelian appeals in play at work as a cashier, ranging from children using logos to get a toy, parents using ethos to justify their refusal to buy said toy, older adults using pathos to get a discount, people using Kairos to justify their splurging (“It’s on sale!”).  I’ve noticed code grooming a lot too, especially within mixed racial crowds. White people’s decorum shifts when in a predominantly black environment, they begin code grooming. Those are the few from Heinrichs that have stayed with me, those that I can readily identify. Without this class, those behaviors would not be blanketed by any academic terms. The child would be whining, the parent would be annoyed, the old people would be trying to mooch, and the splurgers would be irresponsible. My managers would’ve just been fake, just as the mixed crowds. I’m glad that I can pinpoint all of this as forms of rhetoric, even though they are not the conventional argument we automatically think of. Being in this class and reading these books give me a stronger sense of interpretation as I go through the world. It’s one of the more valuable things I’ll take from any class since I’ve been in college.

As far as my e-Portfolio is concerned, it is not ideally what I wanted. When I was first assigned this project, I was excited because I got to create a blog regarding something personal to me. I had already been using tumblr for most of my teenage years, so I thought it would be easy enough. My use of tumblr consisted of me, mostly reblogging relevant pictures and quotes. I’d never focused on the posting and the organization of it all. That was a more daunting task than I’d expected. My gifs did not post accordingly, in the grids I’d always seen them. They took up way too much space and required too much navigation. Originally, I had the vision of having my gifs with explanations and analyses beneath them, but the reflection wouldn’t allow me to do that effectively. I also didn’t have the tabs that I thought I would. Everything is just straightforward and narrow. I thought it would be more exciting, but the material was more important that the aesthetics of it all, so I left it alone.

[junker-town]

Sean Taylor gave a generation of Washington fans a reason to love football

A look back on the 10th anniversary of Taylor’s death.

Everyone who went after Sean Taylor on the football field paid the price. Maybe Eric Frampton didn’t do his research; maybe the adrenaline overwhelmed him, but he learned this lesson the hard way in October 2007.

A grainy video shows Frampton, then rookie safety with the Lions, jawing with Taylor prior to a Week 5 game between Detroit and Washington. Taylor later crushed Frampton’s hubris — along with Frampton’s body — during a fourth-quarter punt return: a great block that helped set up a score in a blowout victory and sent a message. It was a game-changing play in the form of a ferocious hit. It was signature Taylor, a stark representation of his “don’t start none, won’t be none” ethos. It was the distillation of a man who, to a generation of Washington and Miami fans, became a hero.

Taylor is a tie that binds the oldest of millennials with those whose earliest memories of football may very well include Taylor damn near bisecting opposing players, just as he did Frampton. For Washington football fans of that generation, Taylor finally gave them a star who was theirs. No longer would they have to enviously listen to their parents tell stories of Riggins and Theismann. Darrell Green was the great who spanned generations in his 20-year career with the team. But Taylor, bone crushing Taylor, was theirs.

That’s why his tragic death — he was shot and killed during a burglary attempt of his suburban Miami home at the age of 24 — 10 years ago to the day, is so painful to this generation. We lost one of our own.

Our generation has a certain appreciation for Sean Taylor — for better and for worse —because we know people similar to him. We have friends who remind us of him. Or we are that friend. While he was standoffish with the media, we felt we knew him. And because we’re part of the same generation, we aren’t so far removed from our youth that we’ve forgotten what it’s like to make poor decisions that aren’t representative of our character. What it’s like to learn from those moments. What it’s like to be young.

One of the more important lessons you need to learn growing up is who to avoid. You stay away from people who start shit, because they’ll put you in bad situations. They’re the anchors who will weigh you down during your ascent. Sean Taylor didn’t start fights, he ended them. You needed someone like that in your circle, and despite how the media portrayed him due to his standoffishness, you wanted someone like that around.

“He was the original Hit Stick,” Clinton Yates, a senior writer for The Undefeated, recalls of Taylor during the NFL’s halcyon days of laying opponents out. “People forget that about Madden: In that era, you could hit the Hit Stick and it would basically force your player to do what is now an illegal hit in the NFL. Which was go after somebody’s head, elevate from the feet, and decleat [them].”

Sean Taylor instilled fear. He turned the middle of the field into dangerous ground, giving anyone who dared enter that territory alligator arms. What more could a coach, teammate, or fan ask of their safeties? But as Yates notes, Taylor wasn’t merely a headhunter. He hit with purpose. Those hits were warning shots.

“He was hitting to let you know, ‘I’m here,’” he says. “And not just to settle a personal beef; he knew that a big hit was going to change the momentum of a game.”

Yates, a Washington native and fan, was ecstatic when they drafted Taylor in 2004 because he was a good football player beyond being a vicious hitter. To Yates, Taylor’s defining moment in the NFL isn’t leveling punter Brian Moorman during the 2007 Pro Bowl, nor the 2007 game against the Packers where Taylor could’ve picked off Brett Favre five times had he not dropped three potential interceptions. It was a play that guaranteed Washington a playoff berth in 2005.

“I think it was probably that scooped fumble against the Eagles,” he says. “Because he picked it up, he dodged a dude, then went full speed ahead and dove into the end zone. That showed so much of his football capabilities.”

Photo by Jamie Squire/Getty Images

Mia Khalifa — sports pundit for Complex’s Out of Bounds— was drawn to him after her family moved to the D.C. suburbs of Montgomery County, Maryland from Lebanon when she was about 10. Her cousins were Washington fans who loved Taylor, so she became a fan as well.

Khalifa’s favorite Taylor memory is her first: a 2004 win over the Chicago Bears in which he had a “gnarly sack” and an interception.

“He was explosive,” Khalifa, who wore Taylor’s jersey to last year’s Thanksgiving Day game against the Cowboys, says. “He was fun to watch, and he was also a badass. He didn’t give a fuck.”

“There was a degree of authenticity to him that I think parlayed very well with a certain section of the fan base,” Yates explains.

Marshawn Lynch, the IRL Truck Stick, is a close parallel. There’s a similar energy: a fire in their playing styles, an indifference towards convention. It’s a defiance that’s defined them, but has also been wielded against them; Taylor especially.

Taylor’s aggression occasionally came across as recklessness. Those hits that became his M.O.? They earned him his share of unnecessary roughness penalties. That intensity? Sometimes it crossed the line, perhaps most notably during a January 2006 NFC Wild Card game against the Buccaneers; he was ejected for spitting in Michael Pittman’s face. (People remember that before they remember the fumble he returned for a score.) What’s more, Taylor was judged for non-football incidents like his 2004 DUI arrest (the charge was ultimately dropped) and a 2005 incident in which Taylor was arrested for assault after getting into an altercation over two ATVs that were stolen from him (he pleaded guilty to lesser charges; it’s noted in his episode of A Football Life that Taylor, the son of a cop, called the police initially). To some, these incidents mirrored the recklessness they saw on the field. Hell, they underlined it.

For the many, many D.C. fans who worship Taylor, however, his behavior often reflected that of a young man standing up for himself in a world that taught him he had to do that to survive. Yates saw Taylor as an anti-bully — the dude who never really wanted to fight, but never backed down when tested.

“He wasn’t trying to bully people, outside of the confines of the football field where he was paid to do it, but he very much struck me as a dude who caught a lot of heat just for being who he was,” Yates says. “But he knew how to dish it out and chose when to do it, and that’s why I think he connected to our generation. Because you had to make a choice as a kid: Am I gonna be clappin’ these guns in the streets, or am I gonna hold my own and try to make a life for myself? And it felt like Sean was the latter.”

Taylor was all about football. He didn’t show out at the charity events. He wasn’t a nightlife fixture. He wasn’t an outspoken star or charismatic anti-hero. He was as evasive and justifiably mistrustful of the media as Lynch, but never garnered the marketability Lynch has only acquired in recent years because brands realized the potential in celebrating the people’s champ as the people do. The closest Taylor came was the Eastern Motors commercials that anyone who’s spent significant time in D.C., Maryland, or Virginia is familiar with.

Despite his reputation as a shit-talker on the field, he was reserved in public. People appreciated that dichotomy, and he showed a different side when he did speak. As Yates notes, it was normally about his family — specifically his daughter, Jackie, who was born before the 2006 season. Her birth, he told people, was the catalyst for his maturation.

Photo by Win McNamee/Getty Images

The biggest tragedy about Sean Taylor’s death isn’t that we didn’t get to see if he’d redefine the safety position. Or get a gold jacket and bust in Canton, Ohio. It’s that he didn’t get to watch his daughter grow up. He didn’t get to become a husband. He didn’t get to reminisce with his friends, all married and with children, about how wild they were in their younger days. He didn’t get to reach his full potential as a man.

And despite seeing how fatherhood changed him, the media — which had a tendency to color him bad because he was so guarded — latched onto his low moments and blamed him for his own death. Sean Taylor had undeniable knucklehead moments, and without excusing them, I believe it’s fair to credit them to immaturity.

Sadly, the further we get from our youth, the less likely we often are to understand what it’s like to be young. What it’s like to know that you can’t change what’s behind you, but can outgrow certain behavior and see beyond it. To live, not necessarily to regret things, but to absorb lessons from those mistakes.

But Sean Taylor never got to distance himself from his missteps. He never got to fully mature. He’ll always be 24. He’ll always be on the verge of becoming the best version of himself. And for anyone with an ounce of empathy, that’s still heartbreaking a decade later.

“Everyone felt that,” Khalifa says of his death. “Whether they liked [Washington] or not, everyone felt deeply remorseful for that loss and felt for this organization. He was one of those guys that you had to respect because he was just that good.”

As an Eagles fan, I agree completely.

I went to college in D.C. — enemy territory home to both Washington and Cowboys fans. I watched more Washington games than I did Eagles games as a result, so I saw a lot of Taylor’s brief career. And the more I watched him play, the more I loved the way he played. Where I might have bristled at him showing Terrell Owens no respect as an Eagle, I appreciated it when T.O. joined the Cowboys. Taylor was only an enemy twice a year: divisional games against the Eagles. The striped socks that got him and Clinton Portis fined in 2005? That was against us. Yates’ favorite Sean Taylor memory? Against us. And the last time he ever wore a Washington uniform? Yeah, against us.

This guy — who was a little older than me, who had unforgettable moments against the Eagles, who I watched play every week — played his final down against my favorite team. So when the now-closed D.C. skate shop Palace 5ive released this Sean Taylor T-shirt in 2011, I bought one. I don’t even wear it; it’s a piece of iconography that’s a token of my respect.

The Red Line is the Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority’s oldest and busiest public train line. It’s also home to a collection of graffiti so reputable that a D.C.-based band named itself Redline Graffiti. The Red Line’s Brookland-CUA Metro station is also home to a Sean Taylor mural and memorial.

It pays homage to a fallen legend who died doing what he did for a living: defending.

Sean Taylor was a player who could alter the course of the game without touching the ball. A player who made an impact whenever it was in his hands. A player only concerned with doing his job and taking care of his family. A teammate who treated others like they were part of his. A person many of us knew, despite his reticence to speak publicly. That’s why Taylor is revered, even beyond his status as a great football player, by a particular generation of football fans: He didn’t say much, yet we still understood.

[theworstbob]

scattered thoughts on anw9 stage one part one

because the best time to post about american ninja warrior is six days after the episode airs right (all stats from my index, which is a combination of sasukepedia and my own notes)

~So after a year in which a lot of talented dudes got dunked on by the Giant Log Grip, the producers... Removed the Giant Log Grip? I mean, I get it -- the general vibe of ANW courses is something like “bars ‘n tramps,” so the Double Dipper and the Domino Pipes are a better fit for that theme than everything that came before. (Plus, given how Ultimate Beastmaster themed its course, I wouldn’t be surprised if ANW is trying to make its courses fit into a theme; I could see them trying to turn the courses into construction sites, simply because construction workers fit into some vaguely American ideal of hard work.) This is one of the more enjoyable iterations of the First Stage in a while. (Might this be a death knell for the Rolling Log in city courses? Because real talk, the American Rolling Log is garbage. Too much rolling, not enough log. I don’t like seeing an extra 30 seconds being tacked onto runs because competitors have to recover from goddamned dizziness.)

~I do wish they’d make it shorter, though! 2:35 is a long time to be on a course, and in this episode, we saw a lot of montaged runs and a lot of segments where we only watched one person take to the course between commercial breaks. We miss a lot of the First Stage, and we even see a few clears not mentioned at all until the end of the broadcast, and interesting clears at that! Andrew Lowes, a highly notable veteran, clears the First Stage for the first time since ANW6! Cass Clawson, three years after missing Stage Two by a fraction of a second, finally gets his revenge! Michael Silenzi makes his Stage Two debut after four years away from Vegas! It’s completely understandable why they chose to show who they did, those are all Big Names with Good Stories, but man, they couldn’t even find montage space for Andrew Lowes. They gotta consider paring down this course.

~Because while this is one of the more fun iterations of the First Stage, it’s also very much an iteration of the First Stage. The new obstacles are merely variations on old themes; hold onto something and fly, run on an angled platform, and balance bridge. I don’t think anyone would complain if the First Stage were to be overhauled. People come to this show to see people fulfill their potential, and you can only do that so much jumping into the same spider every year, and it’s starting to look like people are solving this course. 36 of the Vegas entrants from last season are making a return trip, the highest number in the show’s history, and of the 20 First Stage clears on Wednesday, 14 made it to Vegas last season, and only one is in their (legit stoked to be using the gender-neutral pronoun here) Vegas debut. Obviously, experience isn’t everything (poor Karsten Williams), but it’s proving more helpful than not, and with more competitors becoming more seasoned (54/100 competitors with prior Vegas experience), it might be fun to see these cats try to solve a new course. One understands why NBC is reticent to change the First Stage, it’s obviously something that works and more clears is probably better for NBC because it gives them more footage to work with, but it’d be nice to see an actual new challenge, not just modified obstacles.

~Did they abandon the conceit where qualifiers from each region had to wear a certain color to denote the region from which they qualified? That’s lame if they did. I always liked seeing how the competitors with brands worked the color into their get-up -- I will never forget Anthony Scott’s giant red watch -- and I feel the show loses a little visual flair without forcing yellow and purple onto the dudes.

~I feel like I’m burying the lede here a little bit: ALLYSSA BEIRD! You could have given me ten guesses for “second woman to clear the First Stage on ANW” and Beird might’ve been seventh. There’s still some measure of unpredictability with the women’s runs on ANW; because each woman gets hella Hero Edit, it’s almost impossible to say which one’s going to clear any given course, so I’m still surprised when Barclay Stockett makes it all the way to the last obstacle, or when Jesse LeBreck (my pick to be the second FWIW) gets hung up on Parkour Road and barely misses. But the show’s editing also spoiled Beird’s clear; we know that ANW hates ending with failure, what with the way they opted to make Jake Murray’s corn dog the final image from ANW8 First Stage and not Geoff Britten taking the plunge on Snake Run. So when you see Barclay Stockett make it so close, then Jesse LeBreck getting closer still, and then you see Allyssa Beird (arguably a less notable competitor than LeBreck, too) on the platform, you sense that there’s a reason ANW is ordering the runs in this order. And when you can predict the outcome, it makes the moment that much less cool. Still a cool moment, I feel like I’m burying the lede a little by complaining about the way the show is edited instead of typing ALLYSSA BEIRD! a hundred times, but I wish ANW could embrace failure a little tighter.

~Like, every time Joe Moravsky runs without an extended pre-run interview package, I get a little nervous, and that makes watching him do his usual Joe Moravsky thing on the First Stage that much more fun, y’know? I get why the show is the way it is, it’s trying to be aspirational reality programming before it’s trying to embrace the randomness and chaos of Sport and I respect that, I just so wish it could change something up.

~Nick Kostreski was entirely cut from this broadcast, and understandably so; while he made it to Vegas last year and was one of the eight qualifying clears in Denver, but those are his only two accomplishments of note; if they couldn’t make room for Andrew Lowes, it would’ve been kinda shitty to cut him for Nick Kostreski. BUT. He is now notable for being the first person to clear from p15 in their city. He was the last man to qualify for Vegas in Denver, then (assuming ANW still runs Vegas in order from ‘worst city Finals result’ to ‘best’) the first to qualify for Stage Two. (I’m assuming nothing good happens for Jody Avila or whoever replaced Charlie Andrews, we saw nothing good happen for Michael Johnson and Jesse LeBreck, and Donovan Metoyer would’ve been the first man up.)

~This is ANW editing done right: I believe they showed Travis Rosen failing Snake Run before they showed Brian Wilczewski this year, just to establish that the first obstacle is dangerous, which shadows how the show used Lucas Gomes’ fall on the same obstacle to set up Rosen’s. So you kind of knew someone serious would go out on Snake Run again this season. And when they showed Brian Wilczewski failing the first obstacle in ANW5, I got absolutely giddy, because he was so going in the drink, AND THEN! And then. ANW doesn’t usually revel in failure like that, because it sort of goes against their ethos, but even if they didn’t show Rosen before B-Wil like I remember, they still set up that fall very well. “This man’s family still makes fun of the dumb this guy did four years ago. Bear witness to the nothing this man has learned.” Like, Brian. Brian. You’re now the dude who’s failed the first obstacle twice. Why would you ever want to be that guy. (Also: nice to see Chris Wilczewski on the sidelines, even if ANW didn’t explain why he wasn’t there.)

~JJ Woods has done two of the ten or so most impressive things I’ve ever seen on this course, now. I still remember this dude beasting through the last three obstacles of the First Stage in thirty seconds back in ANW6, and now here he is, skipping a step on Parkour Run. Like, of course the parkour guy’s gonna do some parkour shit on Parkour Run. (#1 for me is still honestly Jessell Boseman’s one-legged Jumping Spider. I still don’t get how he did it. And Judas Licciardello landing a flip off the Double Dipper was dope, even if it was more showy than useful.)

~Just so we have an end, the 20 clears that have been either shown or mentioned thus far: CLE16 Allyssa Beird (8.48) DEN15 Nick Kostreski (17.72) DEN14 Michael Silenzi (19.44) SAN14 Cass Clawson (22.68) LAX13 Nick Hanson (5.03) DEN9 Drew Knapp (5.03) CLE8 Mike Bernardo (24.90) LAX7 Kevin Bull (27.95) KCT6 Lance Pekus (45.48) SAN6 Andrew Lowes (6.68) DAY5 Travis Rosen (28.80) SAN4 Brent Steffensen (33.66) KCT4 Eric Middleton (23.52) LAX4 Flip Rodriguez (30.55) DAY3 Sean Darling-Hammond (6.26) LAX3 Josh Levin (14.30) DAY2 JJ Woods (16.73) SAN2 Thomas Stillings (32.88) CLE1 Joe Moravsky (42.76) DEN1 Ian Dory (7.34) So the next episode will have Brian Arnold, Meagan Martin, Jamie Rahn, Jon Alexis Jr, Mike Meyers, Dan Galiczynski, Najee Richardson, Mitch Vedepo, Tyler Yamauchi, Jeremiah Morgan, Drew Drechsel, Jessie Graff, Ryan Stratis, Daniel Gil, Nicholas Coolridge, Abel Gonzalez, Adam Rayl, and David Campbell, plus 30+ other talented athletes, so they prolly ended up with over 40 clears. Or maybe they didn’t! Maybe ANW is going to subvert all expectations and show an episode where everyone just gets completely hecked! WHO KNOWS! (They prolly broke 40.)