#it should go without saying that i also copied all of the applicable tags from mermaid’s post too

[callmetippytumbles]

LAST SENTENCE TAG WAR

So this is my first one of these and now that my tag is gonna be in this reaping bowl I know that it will not be the last.

I was tagged by: @realmermaid333

DA RULES: In a new post show the last line you wrote tag as many people as there are words in the sentence.

“It wasn’t lost on him that a hideous seven foot monster was more compelling to Wednesday than his human facade.”

[From the loosely titled Ritual fic (I have not committed to a title yet, do not ask) based on a prompt from the @wylerserver18official server on Discord.]

So I am tagging the people below.

Are there 20 people there? No. I don’t know that many Wyler fic writers on the tumblrs.

Did I just copy Mermaid’s tag list from the post I was tagged on and replace my name with hers? Obviously.

@therulerofallpotatos @suchaladyy @anotherbluesunday @wincestation @cosmic-lullaby @wyleriseverything @nouklea @broken-everlark @wednesdaysviolet @penelopwgarcia @badmoodbatflowers @pororoh @realmermaid333 @gardenoblues @natliecole @dandelionlovesyou

[queermania]

How do tags work? I'm newish to Tumblr and I don't really get the tags. Do I need to tag everything?

hello and welcome! tags serve four major purposes:

to let other people find your content: this is only applicable if you are the creator of the post, not if you reblog it. for example: if you make a post about dean you might want to add the tags "dean winchester" and "supernatural" or even "spn" so that other people who are interested in content about dean can see the post when they're searching for content on tumblr (if you want to find content and you're using desktop, you can search tumblr.com/tagged/supernatural [or whatever it is you're looking for] and you'll be able to see original posts that people tagged as "supernatural." if you're on mobile, frog speed, my friend.) also, friendly reminder not to over-tag things. if you tag a post that is just about dean with "sam winchester" "castiel" "john winchester" etc people are more likely to block you. spam tagging is really annoying.

organization on your own blog: adding tags to your posts lets you find them on your own blog later (again, this is really only useful on desktop, not mobile) and this goes for original posts and reblogged posts. for example: you may have noticed that i tag all of my posts about dean with "dw." that's the organizational tag i use for my own blog. i also have tags that probably don't mean anything to anyone else but that help me to organize certain ~genres of posts on my blog (like "hashtag family"). if you want to search your own blog or someone else's for all of the posts you/they have in a specific tag you can do that on desktop by going to blog.tumblr.com/tagged/tag. so for example if you wanted to search my blog for the dean content you would go to queermania.tumblr.com/tagged/dw

giving other people the ability to block/filter content: this is relevant for both original posts and reblogged posts. for example: someone might have followed you for doctor who content but they are not interested in seeing supernatural content. you tagging your supernatural posts with a "supernatural" tag lets them filter or blacklist it so they don't have to see it. this is also relevant for certain types of content like nsfw, body horror, etc. you may see tags like "tw body horror" or "body horror tw" or "body horror cw" or even "body horror for ts" (that one's an old relic from a time long ago when we had to use an extension called tumblr savior to filter content). content/trigger warnings are subjective. not everybody uses them. not everybody is willing to use them. it's not uncommon to ask people (politely!) to tag for something that might be upsetting to you, with the caveat that they might say no and then it's up to you to decide if you want to continue following them or not. (for example if you asked me to tag for alcohol, i would politely decline, simply because i do not think i would realistically remember to do it and i don't want to promise something i can't deliver and risk harming you.)

commentary that doesn't need to be a part of the post: you may have noticed that a lot of us put our thoughts on any given post in the tags. this is a way to leave commentary without muddying up the post. not all thoughts need to be on the post permanently. in fact, most don't haha. sometimes if you leave commentary in the tags, someone will copy and paste or screenshot them into the body of the post because they think your thoughts deserved permanent status and that other people should see them too. we like to call this getting peer reviewed because we are nothing if not a website full of nerds.

so those are the ways we use tags on this website. you can choose not to use tags at all, use them religiously, or use them only when you want. it's really up to you. you create your own experience. however, if you do opt out of tagging anything at all, people might be less likely to interact with you because it makes it harder for them to curate their own experience. but again, it's really up to you!

[lookingfts]

Hi, I'll preface this by saying that I'm a fan of your writing and this is not a rant at you specifically. It's something that I'm growing more and more frustrated with when navigating content/creations in the fandom (and other fandoms on here too tbh). Your posts just happened to be the ones I came across today and they provide a convenient case study into the matter.

I politely appeal for you to insert gif credit and sources in posts like these: https://www.tumblr.com/lookingfts/752534640842211328?source=share and https://www.tumblr.com/lookingfts/752585046132752384/this-ridiculous-little-man-with-his-stupid-little?source=share

From what I can tell (unsure about the s3e1 bedroom one) but the other two come from: https://www.tumblr.com/chenfordsbee/752307297817165824/kanthony-hands?source=share and https://www.tumblr.com/bakerolivia/750875519674892289/anthony-bridgerton-and-benedict?source=share

I think we all know that the inbuilt tumblr feature to embed existing gifs in posts is very broken (where it automatically credits, and links you back to the full set when you click the text/username under it), and it can be very frustrating to find the exact one you want.

But reposting them yourselves without credit is seen as very bad etiquette amongst creators, and a lot of creators will block people for this reason (to avoid said person collecting and reposting their future content), and warn their fellow creator mutuals to do so too.

Also, it makes the user experience quite annoying for some users. i.e. You see a post with a really cool gif; you swore you've seen that exact one before, you may even recognise the very specific style/coloring, OR you've not seen that scene giffed before but you've wanted to, you now really want to like/reblog the full set if you could find it. Either way; you wish you could see the whole thing from the original post. But there's no link or even an indication as to the original creator/blog it came from, so... yeah this sucks.

From your other posts you seem like a reasonable and well intentioned person, so I don't think you're setting out to be deceptive in any way (some will actually fully repost a mish mash of different sets, and caption and tag it as if it's their own creation), you just want to scream about your faves, as you should. And I'm sorry this got so so long but I think I need to make it really clear, because I assume that some of these reasons/povs/repercussions must be unknown for it to keep happening. I could go into how it affects creators in fandoms in more detail but I'm sure you can imagine and I don't want to extend the lecture (just imagine someone copying and pasting excerpts from your fan fiction, and posting it, without any citation of said fan fiction or even mention of the author).

TLDR - Please link back to the original post if you're sharing stand alone gifs, made by someone else, in your own posts. Or better yet, reblog the original post that you're downloading the images from, with your added commentary (we would actually LOVE to see it, but I do also get if you just want to pluck out one specific moment from the set).

An example:

[THAT ONE GIF FROM THAT MOMENT YOU REALLY WANT TO POST ABOUT]

GIF by @tumblrusername

Blue font to illustrate that this is a hyperlink to the original set. I just based this on the way the aforementioned broken inbuilt one is formatted, but as long as you @ the user (this pops a mention into our activity just like the inbuilt feature does so we can come scream along with you) and link the applicable post in some clear way it's all dandy and helps everyone out.

I really hope that this doesn't come across as hostile, and that you answer so it can be shared to make others more aware too.

Thank you for asking this. You're totally right - I have not been thinking about crediting gif creators, and that's something I need to learn!

I'm still very new to Tumblr and learning the ropes. I didn't really intend to post S3 gifs at all - I was keeping Kanthony photos/gifs I liked on my phone to share with friends, and eventually I realized how many I had saved, so I decided to start making posts with them, and I was simply uploading them from my phone at that point.

You see so many gifs floating around here - I didn't think closely about the time and effort that people are going through to create these gifs, and I will do better in giving them the recognition and attention they deserve. (If one of the gifs I've used is yours, please let me know and I will tag you.)

Thank you to everyone in the fandom for contributing their art, and thank you for standing up for creators.

[oatmealcrisp-freak]

Continuing to snoop through things, and the key points that feel important to me art that Deviantart says

They will not use images submitted to Deviantart for AI, but they're basing their AI from an AI which sources from the open web.

"While DreamUp is based on third-party technologies (like Stable Diffusion) which have trained their models with the open web, DeviantArt does NOT and WILL NOT add images submitted on DeviantArt to these training sets, on or off the platform."

But

"DreamUp makes use of Stable Diffusion, a third-party AI model trained on image datasets gathered by LAION from across the internet."

People are choosing artists to train AI datasets, but those deviants can opt out

"Artists should be able to choose whether or not AI-images can be generated in your style. Artists who meet the criteria in our manual human review of applicants will be able to request an opt out of their username along with several desired pseudonyms linked to them be unavailable for use in DreamUp prompts."

Users using DreamUp can submit prompts based on specific artists, and those artists should be credited

"If an artist isn’t opted out, and their style is referenced in a prompt, they should be clearly credited. Full disclosure of artist references. Upon submitting to DreamUp, artists are asked if there were any specific artists referenced in the prompts. If the answer is yes, the submitter is required to tag the artist who inspired the DreamUp creation."

buuuuuut who's to say if people will actually do this, lbr.

Deviantart DID NOT CONSENT to third party AIs using content from Deviantart? Which feels like it's implying this has happened and they want to cover their rears, legally speaking, but that's conjecture, legally speaking.

And lastly,

Deviantart cannot guarantee deviations won't be used in AI generated work.

By going in and editing a deviation to opt out, (not yet available across all my work apparently???),

it says, "Flag this deviation to inform third parties that you do not authorize it being included in datasets used to train machine learning or artificial intelligence models. Please note that DeviantArt cannot guarantee that it will not appear in any third party datasets. Read more"

This feels like a lot of contradictions that seem to boil down to, it's entirely possible for users to source from content uploaded to Deviantart, and any other piece of art uploaded online, regardless of where it's uploaded. Deviantart has installed an option to protect deviations from being used in AI work, but they also can't promise anything. IT'S ALSO NOT AUTOMATIC, and appears that it does have to be done piece by piece.

Their TOS expands on the above, saying,

"DeviantArt expects all users accessing the Service or the Site to respect creators' choices about the acceptable use of their Content, including for Artificial Intelligence Purposes. When a DeviantArt user does not consent to third party use of their Content for Artificial Intelligence Purposes, other users of the Service and third parties accessing the Site are prohibited from using such Content (labeled as "noai" and/or "noimageai") (i) to train an artificial intelligence system, (ii) as input into any previously trained artificial intelligence system, or (iii) to make available any derivative copy unless usage of that copy is subject to conditions at least as restrictive as those set out here. Automated systems or users that fail to respect these choices will be considered to have breached these Terms.

DeviantArt provides no guarantees that "noai" or "noimageai" directives will be present each time Content is accessed, even if the creator does not consent to use of that Content for Artificial Intelligence Purposes; and absence of such directives does not imply creator consent has been granted.

Users acknowledge that by uploading Content to DeviantArt, third-parties may scrape or otherwise use their works without permission. DeviantArt provides no guarantees that third parties will not include certain Content in external data sources, or otherwise use a creator's work for Artificial Intelligence Purposes, even when such directives are present. By prohibiting such conduct, DeviantArt makes no guarantees that it will pursue each unauthorized use of the Service, and the owners of the works are responsible for policing their own works to the extent permitted by law."

[x] [x] [x] [x]

Deactivating your Deviantart supposedly also deletes all your Deviations.

How long Deviantart servers hold onto work is not something I can find in their TOS. They're also asking for respect to artists in terms of being able to opt out of their work being used in AI art. The terms are soft, and there is zero promise. Regardless, Deviantart is still jumping on, validating, cosigning, etc the AI art (theft) train.

Do with that what you will.

[afjallday]

Opcode Studio Vision 4.5.1 to MIDI

Before we begin:

1. (If not using OS9 compatible hardware) Get SheepShaver and follow an install guide like this one. I will assume you’ve already set this up. If using original hardware, ignore info about the “This PC” drive, and instead transfer files using whatever methods are available to you.

2. Download Opcode Studio Vision 4.5.1 *the final release before they were acquired and became defunct. (originally from this forum, you may need to register)  Also be sure to download Open Music System 2.3.8 (OMS).

3. Download ResEdit  (this tip courtesy of https://discussions.apple.com/thread/7440800?answerId=29707864022#29707864022)

Please note: The data and resource forks of OS9 files will be damaged when storing them on non-Macintosh file systems. To prevent this, files should be encoded with the MacBinary format (.bin) or Stuffit compression (.sit / .hqx) before transferring off of an OS9 machine. This includes application files as well as project files.

Installing OMS And StudioVision Pro

As soon as you start up SheepShaver and finally boot in to the desktop, make sure you see the “This PC” icon allowing you to copy and paste files between your PC and the emulator. If you don’t see it, google how to set it up within SheepShaver and whatever OS you’re running on your main computer.

Once that’s settled, go to “This PC” and navigate to the folder containing the “.sit” files for both OMS and Studio Vision Pro. Copy both to the desktop and unpack them to a new folder. Now open the OMS folder. Click the Installer and use Easy Install. Let it run, then reboot when prompted.

Upon reboot, follow this chart:

Make sure as many of these files as possible are in the correct location on your drive. This includes files inside the Studio Vision folder. Please note this chart is for Vision DSP, but it still mostly applies for Studio Pro. Just regard anything listed as Vision DSP as Studio, and ignore anything that you don’t have inside either folder. Everything else needs to be moved to the right location since Studio Vision doesn’t have a proper installer.

Now navigate to the Studio Vision Pro folder and open StudioVision PPC

You will likely get an error about a font called Aloisen not being found. Don’t worry about this, it is only necessary for the notation function, not for MIDI work. You may also encounter a popup about ASIO drivers not working, just hit Cancel.

The drivers may be required for playback in the software, but if all you need to do is export as MIDI, you can ignore this.

You should be greeted by a screen like this:

Now, once again navigate to the “This PC” drive and copy over any StudioVision document files you have.

Go into the folder where your project files are located and select View > as List. This will give you more information about the files inside, such as the kind of file it is. Below is a screenshot of the types of files you may encounter.

If it says StudioVision document, you’re all set and don’t need to read the next section. Skip to Exporting as MIDI. If it instead only says “document” read on.

Restoring The Correct File Kind

Now, it’s quite likely that somewhere along the way, the files lost their association metadata, making them impossible to open in Studio Vision without tweaking them first. That’s where ResEdit comes in.

Unpack the “ResEdit_2.1.3.sit.hqx” file to its own folder on the desktop as well

Open it up and navigate to the ResEdit program. Open it and you will be greeted by this splash screen:

Click on the image and it will start the program.

From here, a file navigaiton window should open. Find the Studio Vision documents you want to alter. Open one and you will be greeted a screen like this:

Select OK and ignore the window it opens. Next, go to File > Get Info For [filenamehere] . It should open a window like this

We are only interested in the two blank boxes near the top- Type: and Creator:

Here we are basically restoring the tags that tell Mac OS 9 these files are for a specific program. In our case that is Studio Vision Pro and these are the tags (caps are important here):

Type: MID2   Creator: MIDA

Now, go to File > Save. If you see a text box about not allowing more than 4 characters in the type box, double click the box until it’s highlighted purple. Then hit backspace and type the tag again. Same for the creator box if required. Now save it. We are done with ResEdit.

Exporting As MIDI

From here it’s pretty straight forward. Double click the newly restored file and it should open StudioVision. You may see a popup like this about undefined channels:

That’s completely normal. It’s unlikely you’d still have the same setup from over two decades ago. Just click Cancel. You should now see a screen similar to this:

From here, select File > Export as MIDI File... and Select a folder to export to.

PLEASE NOTE: Exporting to midi only exports the currently selected sequence, not the entire project. If your project has multiple sequences, be sure to export each one individually.

Now simply copy the exports back to a folder on the “This PC” drive. From here you may notice none of the files are actually labeled as “.mid” files. Simply select the file name, and add the “.mid” to the end yourself, agreeing to any popups about changing the file type in the process. You are now DONE. I hope this was helpful.

[wallylinda]

So lately, I’ve been seeing a lot of people talking in my tags about how they don’t know where to start reading comics or about how it’s really hard to access them to begin with. Which is completely understandable, especially if you’re looking to get into DC or Marvel, and why I made the following cheat sheet for anyone who is potentially interested:

To preface this, I’ll begin by saying that there is no right way to “begin” reading comics. Both DC and Marvel are continuity franchises; meaning that the start of their timelines originates all the way back to their first publications in the late 1930s. That is to say, each and every character has a history that spans decades with literally thousands of interconnecting appearances in hundreds of different series. It doesn’t help that writers like to reference these past arcs under the assumption that the reader already has this prior knowledge. 

It is unreasonable for a beginner to go through—much less want to—read all of this. And because of that, any comic you start off with will inevitably have tie-ins to events, arcs, or characters that you’ll probably know jack-shit about. There is unfortunately no way around that. However, it’s incredibly easy to get into the flow of things, and mainstream comics are genuinely worth your investment into them despite how confusing they can be at times. 

That’s what this guide is ultimately for. It’s an easily digestible, detailed starting point for any beginner reader with a lot of information that you might not otherwise find out about for a long time. 

---

TERMINOLOGY:

Yes, I’m giving you vocab. A lot of these words are basic in concept but are necessary to know when discussing comics. You should have at least a basic understanding of what these words are referring to. For convenience’s sake, they will be listed in alphabetical order. 

Annual: An oversized special of a particular comic series that is released once a year. 

Continuity: Refers to a select period of time within the publishing record.

Ex: The New 52 era from 2011 to 2016 is considered a continuity.

Floppies: Slang term for issues. Usually only used when referring to the physical copy of an issue. 

HC: An acronym for “hardcover”. Refers to a collected edition in a hardcover format. 

Issue: The “chapters” of a comic series.

Ex: issue #5 refers to the fifth installation of a particular series. 

Mini-series: A comic that has a set number of issues. Can also be referred to as a limited series. 

Omnibus: Large hardcover collections. 

One-shot: A large single-issue comic book. 

Ongoing: A series that is currently being published.

Reboot: Ends a continuity in order to recreate its characters, plotlines, and backstories from the beginning. 

Ex: Crisis on Infinite Earths, the New 52, and Rebirth are all reboots. 

Retcon: When a past event is changed retroactively without a reboot. 

Ex: Bucky Barnes’ backstory was retconned so that instead of dying, he was brainwashed. 

Run: A consecutive string of issues as written by a singular author. 

Ex: Mark Waid’s time of the Flash is referred to as “Waid’s run”. 

TPB: An acronym for “trade paperback”. Refers to a collected edition in a paperback format. 

Variant: An alternative cover of an issue. 

There are also four distinct comic eras that you may see being referenced. These eras are organized depending on both their publishing date and their writing style. While it is not strictly necessary for you to know the exact details, here is their chronology regardless:

Golden Age (1938-1956)

Silver Age (1956-1970)

Bronze Age (1970-1985)

Modern Age (1985-Present Day)

---

RESOURCES:

Included below are the three resources that I personally use on a frequent basis. While this is applicable for me, keep in mind that there are other websites that you can and will use. For example, you might google a reading list for a more concrete look at a character or arc, or you might search up a term on Wikipedia. It really depends on what you’re looking for. 

readcomiconline.li

This website is the number one pirating website when it comes to comics. Despite your opinions of piracy, the fact of the matter is that this is the easiest way to access comics and read them at no significant cost to yourself. Though please remember to put on an ad-blocker before you start.

dcuguide.com

This website is a fan-run index of all things DC. It sorts character appearances chronologically or by publication date, has miniature biographies of each character, stores all published DC issues in its database, and much, much more. It’s a lifesaver. 

cmro.travis-starnes.com

Essentially the Marvel equivalent to dcuguide; it includes a list of chronological appearances for characters and arcs. However, I am told that it doesn’t have in-depth character biographies.

leagueofcomicgeeks.com

This website is an index where you can browse through all published issues of DC, Marvel, and assorted indie brands like Darkhorse, Image, and Valiant. What marks this website as a must-have, however, is its “New Comics” section, which marks the release date for all ongoing comics. Use this as a reference to when an ongoing comic is going to be updated or when a new comic will be released.

---

BUYING COMICS: THE DO’S, THE DON’TS, AND THE MAYBES

On the off chance that you’ll end up wanting to collect comics, this section will save you hundreds of dollars. I genuinely mean it: knowing where and which comics to buy is incredibly useful. 

I’ll start with floppies. The easiest way to get floppies is at a local comic shop. Issues typically cost either $4 or $5 each depending on the comic that you’re buying. Rare variants can fetch high prices (I have one that is worth $15) and annuals and one-shots are typically somewhere in the $6 to $10 range. Comic shops also sell TPBs, HCs, and omnibuses, but what’s available in that regard will vary from shop to shop. 

As for buying online, there are two stores that I can actually recommend to have good service: instocktrades.com and mycomicshop.com. 

InStockTrades sells only TPBs, HCs, and omnibuses. Unfortunately, the available choices tend to lean more towards the esoteric and are missing a lot of collected editions. However, there is always a really good sale going on so you save a lot of money on what you do buy. Shipping takes a long time but it’s absolutely worth the wait, especially if you buy more than $50 for the free shipping. 

In comparison, MyComicShop has a much wider selection and you can buy floppies. You can preorder for 35% off and there’s an auction for collectibles every week, alongside value packs and sales. Shipping is pretty pricey, but you have the guarantee it’s going to be quality. 

There are other online shops I can name, but I have personally never used them and cannot attest to their service. 

Word of advice: never, EVER buy directly from Amazon. The prices are ridiculously skewed and most of the comics you find there are damaged replicas, not to mention the shipping prices are horrendous. I exclusively used Amazon for the first few months of my collecting and trust me when I say that it has not done me any good. Amazon should be used as the last resort and even then, you should try looking on Ebay first. 

You don’t need to know the CGC grading system for comics—that’s something you can research on your own if you ever want to—but remember that the typical standard for comics going from best to worst is Near Mint (NW), Very Fine (VF), Fine (FN), Very Good (VG), and finally Good (G). Typically, stores put these labels next to the comic to indicate what condition it’s in.

Now in regards to storing floppies, use bags and boards. They’re the best way to protect issues from wear-and-tear and are really, really cheap to boot. To use them, first insert the board into the bag. Make sure that both the larger flap of the bag and the glossy side of the board is facing you. That glossiness is to ensure that the back of your comic doesn’t bleed into the board. After inserting the board, just slide your comic in and bend over the flap to the back, where you then tape it down to seal the comic in.  

Try watching Nerd Morning’s Youtube video titled “How to Properly Bag and Board Comic Books” as a reference. I understand that my explanation will be a bit confusing regardless of how I word it. 

You don’t have to know this, but for the record, there are three different types of bags and boards: Golden, Silver, and Modern. All three are designed to fit different sizes as the shape of comics has changed over the decades. If you’re buying anything from, say, the 2000s and up, then stick with the Modern bags and boards. Buying online will sometimes give you the bag and board for free alongside your purchase, and if you’re buying local, you can always ask the workers there for clarification. The brand I personally use is called Hot Flips. 

You do not need any protective material to store either TPBs or HCs. Some people chose to bag and board them regardless, but in my personal opinion, it always ends up looking a little bit stupid. 

---

There is information that I am probably missing in this list, but that’s the general gist of all that you need to know. I can’t personally decide which you comics you’re going to read, but hopefully this cheat sheet will help make starting the process easier for you. Please have fun reading comics and try to enjoy the experience!

[leukorosa]

Discord Bot Developing [Python & Repl][1/3] Last Updated: 31/05/2022

"Learn, for the sake of learning, not a means of gaining attention." Target:

Understanding The Bot

Bot Creation & Server Invite

Bot Setup & Packages . .. ...

A. The Beginning

Introduction...

Ever wondered, how amazing it would be to finally make your own discord bot. With so many possibilities, and despite the fact that there are limited interactions, delving into the world of discord bot development might be worth getting a shot.

What Is A Discord Bot?

For any of you, who have stumbled into this post out of curiosity, and if you've never even used a social media called, "Discord", then you should probably read this first. A discord bot is a bot from Discord than can do many things depending on how you developed it. It can be used to play songs, send messages, play games, make an economy, and lots lots more. Even AI chatbots could be created, but that is something rather complex. Essentially, there are primarily two languages that are used for bot development. One of them, is in Python, and another, using JS. Here, I'll be using Python.

Lack of Talent? Inexperienced?

So, do you lack the talent of creating your own bot? Or maybe, you don't have enough experience in this department? Well...I hate to break it to you, but, you should just give up...of course not, hell, I even started making my bot without having the basics of Python. Indeed, it started off badly, with me not being able to send one message for 2 days, but now, I've been creating economies and using lots of packages. So, don't discourage yourself when something goes wrong. Be patient, take pride in your work, and always remember everyone has different experiences. Now then, let's skip to the bot creation, shall we?

. .. ...

B. Bot Creation

Bot Creation? How?!

To begin with...how do you even start creating a bot? Do you just, think of it, and "poof"! It exists? No. You have to make your bot from scratch. First, go to Discord and sign in, then, go click this website:

Once you've reached there, you should find something like this. Go click the "new application". Input whatever bot name you want, however you want.

In this part, it is all fully customizable, but here are the top 3 that you should probably customize, especially if you have an aesthetic sense within you. All of these three will be shown when you see the bot in your discord server.

Once you're done with that, focus on the tabs at the side. Click the bot tab, and then click the "add bot". Once you've done that, scroll down and click the permissions and intents that you want to use. In my case, I will click all the intents to check, and give the administrator permission (yes, because I am also lazy).

Fun Fact: Coincidentally, when I made this bot, the tag was 6909!

And then, we go check the tabs again and click the OAuth2. Under that, go click URL Generator. Check the scopes of bot. Scroll down, and click the permissions you have chosen earlier. Scroll down to the furthest part, and click the link for it.

Now that, that's done...go make a new tab in whatever search engine you're using (ex. Google, Edge, Firefox). Add the link to the new tab, and invite it to the server of your choosing. Also remember that whatever permissions you've clicked check, must have the same permissions as the position you have in the discord server. An example of this is if you clicked admin permission. You must be an admin in the server you want to place it in. Anyways, If all goes well, it should have a result like this when you click it in the member's tab.

One last thing before we go to bot coding. Go back to the discord developer applications, go back to the bot tab and copy the token. (If there is no token, click the reset button). This token will be used for coding. You should NEVER share this token with anyone. Even your friends. If you ask why? Let's say that you/your friend's account got hacked, and your bot will also be hacked! That's something that should be avoided! But enough of that... That whole process above was easy peasy, right? If you're done with all that, and everything worked out correctly congrats! You've just finished creating your bot into existence!

. .. ...

C. Bot Setup & Package Installation

Bot Setup, Packages & More

If you're doubting yourself that it was way too easy...yeah it was. Coding the bot is much more tiresome. Now, go on to replit.com (the website below), and make an account, (or use the one you have if you already have one).

Make a new repl, under the language of Python. Once you've done that, you have been redirected to the main.py file of your new repl. Do take in mind to change the title of your new repl if you haven't named it...you'll need it later.

Let's get back to work! Now that we're in the main.py file, write down all this code. And then check the side tabs. Click the tab with the keylock. Under that, add a new secret. Change its key to "BotToken", and its value to the bot token I told you to get earlier.

That should be all the setup necessary! By the way, if you have NOT CLICKED all the intents as yes, you should remove the code for "intents=discord.Intents.all()" Go run your bot, and see if it's online first. If you encounter any errors, read what error you got, and try to change the code that you had based on what the error is. . .. ...

D. Code Explanation

In This Post: import os - Imports os so that the bot token you have will be kept as a secret! bot = commands.Bot(command_prefix=["?","!",".."]) - Gives the prefix/prefixes that you will add to your bot. intents=discord.Intents.all() - Makes all the intents for the bot as true. bot.remove_command('help') - This removes help command in all commands you make so that you won't have to write a help text in all of them. bot.run(os.getenv('BotToken')) - Let's the bot get the value of the BotToken. Because os was imported, this can be used.

NOT In This Post: import random - This allows you to make text random. import asyncio - Delays when the bot sends some stuff. import discord - This is the python package that allows all discord Python code to work. from discord.ext import tasks - This allows the bot to create tasks, without you having to write the command. from discord.ext import commands - This allows the bot to send commands via @bot.command. case_insensitive=True - Allows the bot's command name and aliases to be repeated in any way. (Ex. if the alias of command is "help" when you type the command name in Discord as "HeLp" instead, it will still work).

from discord.ext import tasks from discord.ext import commands

bot = commands.Bot(command_prefix=["yourprefixhere:3"],case_insensitive=True,intents=discord.Intents.all()) bot.remove_command('help')

Copy-Paste Code:

import os import random import asyncio import discord

from discord.ext import tasks from discord.ext import commands

bot = commands.Bot(command_prefix=["changeyourprefixhere:3"],case_insensitive=True,intents=discord.Intents.all()) bot.remove_command('help')

bot.run(os.getenv('BotToken'))

Congrats! You've made it all to the end of creating the most basic bot! As of now, all you've done is only the setup and the creation. Expect some usage of discord tasks, discord commands, embeds, async with typing, and asyncio~ . .. ... If I've made any typos, please do tell me! I will edit it ASAP. Thank you!

[zara2148]

Fethsteel Fic: Not Good Enough (For You)

So here we go, my take on how Fethry Duck joined F.O.W.L. and met Steelbeak. Less warning stuff for this one, mostly just implied abuse, though it’s clear Steelbeak has not had a pleasant history. Also, both he and Fethry have some self esteem issues... and there’s not exactly spoilers for “Lost Harp of Mervana,” but the new intro takes place right after it.

Also on AO3. Make sure leave kudos and comments there. I enjoy the feel of being applauded.

Huey was placing Isabella Finch's journal back in Uncle Scrooge's study when he spotted the tin can phone there, now connected to nothing. Scrooge held on to everything in the mansion, even seemingly useless things, on the grounds that it may one day come in handy again. 

It was one reason why Trash Day could be such a nightmare, though Scrooge was starting to learn how to let things go...

Huey found Della and Donald unpacking their gear off the sub, hanging up suits and boxing equipment until it was ready to be used again. "Uncle Donald? Mom? Do you know how to get in touch with Cousin Fethry? I think he'd love to hear all about Mervana."

"No, sorry, sweetie. I haven't heard anything from him since he rode off on the back of that... giant... fish..." Della shuddered in remembered revulsion.

"Mom, it was a krill."

"A fish is still a fish by any other name."

"You also seemed fine with Mitzy at the time."

"I was too busy thinking about all the Moonlanders we had to beat up."

Donald sighed and turned away from a crate to answer Huey’s question. “I haven’t heard from him either since then.” He shrugged. "But that's normal for Fethry. He either calls every five minutes or he gets so wrapped up in something we don't hear from him for six months."

"Doesn't he have a cell phone we could call?”

"Knowing Fethry, it would just get dropped in the ocean." There was a reason Scrooge only trusted Fethry with a tin can after one too many busted phones.

Huey’s beak twisted in discomfort. “But what if he got in trouble? What if he needed our help?”

Donald let out a breath, more frustrated with himself than anyone else, even Fethry. He knelt in front of Huey and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Fethry is…” Cuckoo bananas really hadn’t been the right thing to say to Huey, not when Donald could see the similarities between the two of them. Unsure how else to finish that sentence, he tried again.

“Fethry is who he is. But he’s also a grown adult capable of making decisions and taking care of himself. If he ever needs us, he knows where we are.”

Della grinned proudly. “He’s a part of the Duck family. Surviving is what we do.”

Uncle Donald and Mom weren’t wrong about that. Cousin Fethry had survived alone in a collapsing sea base for years. He knew the Junior Woodchuck guidebook from cover to cover, just as Huey did. He was better prepared than most to face trouble when it found him.

"Okay, I'll just make sure to write down all my observations about Mervana to share with him when he gets in touch."

Donald gave Huey a smile. "I'm sure he'll love that."

***

“Don’t call us, we’ll call you.”

It was an old refrain at this point. 

The last job interview he had, Fethry had spent a full half-hour talking about the eating habits of krill and the merits of singing when asked about his team management skills. 

The interview before that, he spoke briefly about the endless silence of the ocean when asked how he dealt with workplace difficulties. He’d been too quiet after that question.

And the interview before that… well, he didn’t think that room was ever going to be the same.

Fethry’s laptop was old. Wires were sticking out and duct tape was barely holding the screen together. He browsed through the listings for scientists on Quacked In, tweaking his cover letter and resume slightly for each.

Maybe he was going about this the wrong way. Maybe he should try for a slightly smaller position at a lab, like a custodian! He had experience keeping things in custody! And then he could work his way up from there. 

But the little Donalds had such faith in him. They believed he could be a great scientist. Fethry wasn’t going to let them down. He never really realized until it was too late, but Fethry knew he had a habit of letting his family down.

Gladstone had offered to help, after that big event with purple people from the sky… ahh, yes, the invasion! But Fethry knew how often people tried to get close to his cousin to use his luck. Family shouldn’t do that.

The next listing didn’t quite catch his eye. But Fethry was at the point of applying for everything that came up for “scientist” and read through what little there was.

“WANTED: Skilled scientists for private company in Duckburg. Duties will vary. Flexible work schedule, late nights occasionally required. Must be able to roll with the punches.”

He had no expectations that it would progress to a job offer. How he chose to look at was that he was doing really well on reaching his goal of 100 job rejections. He’d read all about re-framing your objectives for positivity!

Once he reached 100, well, he might as well try for 200 rejections then.

He reviewed his resume and cover letter on the final submission screen. He clicked “Send.”

Then he moved onto the next listing and thought no more of it.

***

F.O.W.L.’s computer settings were extremely sensitized when it came to tracking the movements and activities of the Duck-McDuck clan. They knew when Hubert Duck received a new merit badge, or when Dewford Duck uploaded another video to his overlooked Insta, or when Llewellyn bought a soda that wasn’t Pep branded.

Any diversion from or progress in the Duck’s family’s normal routine could be significant. That’s why they monitored it all.

So when a member of the Duck family applied for one of their vacant positions, it got noticed. Alarms went off, alerting the highest-ranking members in F.O.W.L. command.

Just ten minutes after the application was received, Bradford clicked through it on his laptop.

F.O.W.L. could just ignore this. Stay away from the Duck family until they were more ready to move out in the open. It would be a sensible move.

But there was potential here he couldn’t overlook.

Fethry Duck was one of the harder members to track ever since the McDuck SubLab crumbled into an undersea abyss. Satellite images last had him riding some sort of kaiju across the ocean, which was just typical when it came to the Duck-McDuck family.

When the moon invaders came they had made many mistakes, such as caring more about the acknowledgment of their perceived superiority than how they could exploit the Earth. But they had been right that it was better to have all members of that family accounted for when it came to global-scale plans.

Having Fethry under constant watch at F.O.W.L. would leave Gladstone as the most transient variable. And the lottery winnings and sweepstakes prizes he left in his wake would make him infinitely easier to track.

Fethry was also one of the more controllable members of the Duck family. Neither misfortune nor ostentatious fortune dogged his steps. He didn’t question intention and he didn’t try to stir up trouble for his amusement. He was so lacking in ambition that he stayed in a lonely janitorial position for almost five years. If he was taken to a lab and given every reason to stay, he likely would do so without seeing anything amiss.

His goal was to steal the world right out from under Scrooge. Why not start by stealing a member of the man’s family? One Scrooge was unlikely to miss for quite some time, given his avoidance of Fethry’s company.

Yet for a duck who didn’t believe in handouts, it said something that Scrooge still cared enough about Fethry to give him a string of jobs that he more or less performed adequately. He’d prefer it not come to threats, especially since harm to his family made Scrooge predictably savage. But if worse came to worse… better to have a hostage than do without.

And if he was useless? Disposing of him would be no hardship.

He clicked “Accept” and composed a brief response, suggesting a range of times that Fethry could visit a front location in downtown Duckberg.

After opening up the email and reading through it, Fethry squealed and picked out the earliest possible time. 

***

Fethry hummed as he walked inside the address the email gave him. It was a plain building, notable only for its pristine white exterior that seemed all too blank.

He’d dressed up nice for the occasion. His red jacket was replaced with a slightly frayed and browned business suit jacket. His tie was a piece of dried kelp that Mitzy had picked out for him. She always had the best eye when it came to kelp. And his cap was still present, keeping his thoughts toasty warm!

Yet his throat felt clogged and simultaneously too dry. The papers in his hand would be wrinkled if he clutched them any tighter. There was a heavy feeling in his chest that told him he’d be out of here soon enough, and he would need to try his luck elsewhere.

A duck with a dirty face and ruffled hair sat behind the visitor’s desk. Her name tag read “Ample.”

He approached her without his usual bounce. “Hello, I’m here for an interview.”

She nodded and glanced through the schedule. “Fethry Duck?”

“Yes, that’s me.”

“The director is ready to see you now. Go through the double doors over there.”

He dipped forward in an awkward half-bow, unsure if a handshake would be too presumptuous. “Thank you!”

He pushed his way through the double doors. The room was in grey shadow, a large desk slightly off toward one of the corners. Two chairs were in front of the desk, facing the figure behind it.

The shadows slightly obscured the person behind the desk. He could make out a shape but no features.  

The shadow turned to him. “Ah, thank you for coming. Please take a seat.”

Fethry grabbed one of the chairs, shifting his paper copy of his resume as he looked at his interviewer up close.

Oh, he knew this vulture! He worked with Uncle Scrooge before! His name was buzzing around in the back of Fethry’s skull, waiting to be grabbed hold of…. what was it, what was it…?

“Bradley!”

“It’s Bradford,” he corrected in a cold tone. 

Fethry slumped back in his seat, feeling small. “O-oh, I’m sorry.”

Bradford did not take the time to acknowledge what he said. He sat “So, Fethry Duck. Scrooge’s nephew.”

“Yes.”

“You hold no degrees, no certifications that would qualify you for a scientific position.”

“... no.” Fethry knew how much those pieces of paper meant to people. He sunk into his chair, almost wishing it could swallow him up, the way the ocean did…

...and that was not a train of thought he needed to be boarding right now. Fethry stepped off a mental platform, letting it whiz by.

Bradford continued, neither noticing nor caring about Fethry’s inner world and its struggles. “And yet, you thought you could apply here, for a scientific position with us.” He stood up and started to circle around Fethry. “Do you know what we do here, Fethry?”

“Science?”

“Among other things.” Bradford paused behind Fethry. Fethry couldn’t quite bring himself to turn and look at him. “What we do here... let’s just say we're out to change the world.”

Bradford resumed his circle and came to a stop in front of Fethry. He let silence reign for a few seconds before speaking. “And Fethry Duck? We’re willing to give you the chance to join our ranks.”

Fethry had to swallow down dry disbelief. “Really?”

“Yes.”

Fethry’s hands were clammy as he held out his stacks of papers. His grip wasn’t shaking, but his limbs felt hollow. “You don’t even want to look at my resume first?”

“I’ve already seen it.”

He let his arms fall to his sides. His voice came out small, as if he was once again speaking from the bottom of the ocean. “Why me?”

Silence returned. Bradford considered him over his beak.

“You’re the unnoticed member of the Duck-McDuck family. Isn’t it time you had a chance to prove yourself?”

Bradford wasn’t wrong. He wanted that chance. But the implication that he was only getting this job because of his family...

Well. Wasn’t that how he got every job he ever had?

Bradford turned away from him and loomed his way back behind his desk. “Mind you, the job still isn’t much. You’ll be working in a lab on your own projects, yes. But you will remain under direct supervision for the time being. Before undertaking any venture, you are to submit a full report that outlines expected costs and outcomes, in accordance with our guidelines.”

He sat down, his back hunched to allow him to continue looming from a lower height. “The pay is minimum wage, but you can work your way up through experience. Food and board will be provided on-site, so that’s two fewer things you have to worry about.”

Fethry absent-mindedly fiddled with his kelp tie, his attention otherwise on Bradford as he continued.

“As you may have surmised, your work is to be considered top secret. For the time being, we will ask that you remain in the facilities to better learn your responsibilities. There is to be no contact with the outside world without prior approval. Otherwise, you put ourselves and the work we do at risk.”

“If you accept the job under these terms, a car will be dispatched to pick up you and any belongings you choose to bring tomorrow morning.” Bradford steepled his fingers and looked through Fethry. “Do you accept these conditions?” 

Fethry had forgotten he hadn’t said yes to anything yet. He wasn’t sure how he got so caught up that he missed that.

He could bring his team with him, their jar was extremely portable. But taking this job would mean saying goodbye to Mitzy for a while… hopefully, she would understand. 

He nodded, then said for emphasis, “Yes.”

“Well, then. Welcome, Fethry Duck, to…” Bradford paused again, his words trailing off into familiar silence. “... well, we’ll just call it your new place of work.”

***

There wasn’t a whole lot to do at their headquarters between missions. The funnest thing to do around here was to play all the arcade games after the kids had gone home for the day.

However, the last time Steelbeak did that he blew an entire paycheck and ended up with only 20 tickets to show for it—not even enough to trade-in for a piece of candy. That didn’t make him stupid, that made the games rigged.

Now he stuck to the actual secret parts of their secret lair, wandering the halls. His wallet stayed full and fat, but the time between missions dragged on and on.

The gun course was fun, but there was only so much offtime an agent was allowed there. Spend too much time shooting things and command would send you over to their quack shrink.

The rec room was okay, but he’d be fighting every off-duty Eggman there if he wanted to pick which channel to watch on the sole TV. Not that he wouldn’t win, but his time in the prison rec room, and the underground fighting ring’s rec room before that, taught him that victory wasn’t worth it if you couldn’t find any good shows playing.

Which is how he often ended up doing what he did right now, trailing after Heron down to the labs. He’d watch her and watch the other scientists, trying to see how what they did tied into F.O.W.L.’s big ol’ villain schemes.

Did he always understand what she was working on? No. Did she ever really try to explain it in an easily understood way? Also no. Did these trips to the labs often end with her metal hand clamped around his beak, hissing at him and calling him names? No, well, yes. Yes, it did.

… he was supposed to be going somewhere with this, but he wasn’t quite sure where. Wait, no, now he remembered. 

If he wanted to someday be the one hatching the schemes, he should watch how others hatched theirs first. It was like watching the prizefighter in the ring to learn how to beat him. Some people would only hit you if you asked them for anything, so you had to watch how they did something instead.

Most of the other scientists ignored him, and he didn’t pay them much attention either. But today, a duck in a red hat waved at them as he and Heron stepped inside the lab.

“Oh, hello! I’m Fethry!” The lab coat he was wearing hung loosely on him, clearly meant for a slightly larger bird.

“O-kaaay...?” Why was he expected to care?

A grin was spreading across Heron’s face as she looked the duck up and down. Then she turned her gaze to Steelbeak as she gestured offhandedly at the duck. “Fethry is our new marine specialist. He’ll be working on some of our most important projects.”

Heron… sounded like she was trying to hold back a laugh. What, was this smart guy really good at the jokes? Or did he know a party trick or two?

And what kind of name was Fethry? Might as well have called him “Webby” since he had webbed feet.

“Say, Fethry?” He knew that tone of voice from Heron. He didn’t always know the details of what she was saying, but he knew the sweetly sharpened tone was meant to cut someone down to size.

He felt… lighter, watching that tone be aimed at someone who wasn’t him. Like he was actually in on the joke for once. He also felt the urge to move to safer ground.

Heron’s smile was wide as she continued. “Why don’t you explain to my partner, Steelbeak, what you’re working on? He loves to hear about scientific experiments in great detail. Especially if you use a lot of long words.”

Okay, maybe he was still part of the joke.

Fethry’s eyes widened—he didn’t even know it was possible for someone to widen their eyes like that until Fethry did. “I’d love to!”

“Great!” Heron said in a passable imitation of Fethry’s enthusiasm. Under her breath she added, “Maybe now I can get some real work done.”

Steelbeak’s jaw tightened as she walked away. He refocused his gaze on the red-capped duck, who was all but jumping in place. 

A snort escaped him as he sat down at a table. At least if this pipsqueak tried to clamp his beak, he could just knock him into next week.

“So what are you working on?” This was still more exciting than watching the walls, after all.

Fethry laughed nervously. It had been a while since anyone paid him a significant amount of attention. “Well, at the moment I’m just filling out the request paperwork. But I’m hoping to start an experiment on delaying the eating habits of the crown of thorns starfish.”

“The what?”

“Crown of thorns starfish. It eats coral.”

“And that is?”

“Coral is like…” Fethry scratched his head. He could never remember all the big words like polyps, sessile, and Anthozoa when he needed to. “It’s like skeletons scattered across the seafloor that fish live in.”

“Really? So fish just decide to live in dead bodies.” Sounded fake, but at least it wasn’t boring.

“Well, coral is a skeleton, but it’s also alive. It’s really bad when they do die.”

“So the fish live in alive dead bodies.” This Fethry guy was talking an interesting sort of crazy.

“Skeletons, yes. Called coral. Only these sea stars eat the coral, so the fish have no place to live then.”

“Now, these sea stars start off eating algae. It’s been called the grass of the sea,” he explained before Steelbeak even had to ask. Fethry’s beak scrunched up. “Though I have to say, grass usually tastes much better.”

“How long it takes for the sea stars to go from algae to coral varies. And there’s a lot of these starfish in the ocean. If they made the switch all at once, they could do a lot of damage.”

Huh. For the guy’s first project, it had the makings of a decent scheme. “So… if you could figure out how to make them do it, you could have them eat the fish out of house and home?”

Fethry actually nodded at that. “Or if I could figure out a way to slow it down, I could buy time for the reefs to grow.”

“...huh.” He actually followed most of that. Sure in his mind, coral reefs had a lot more skulls than they normally did. But he got the gist of what Fethry was talking about.

Black Heron hummed as she worked without interruption. Fethry calculated the costs of feeding and housing a small colony of starfish, making sure to show his work. And Steelbeak imagined blackmailing a fishing village with an army of sea stars. Small potatoes when it came to true villainy, but everyone had to start somewhere.

***

It wasn’t one of Heron’s longer science sessions. She tapped at some keys, read some screens, fiddled with some gadgets, and was ready to leave in a couple of hours.

Fethry had remained in the lab, drawing up plans for a sea star’s dream home. They’d need plenty of walking room, he’d said, so he was drawing up little pathway designs. Including one for a yellow brick road.

He started to reach out a hand to Steelbeak… for what, Steelbeak wasn’t sure. His body tensed in defense.

And Fethry must have noticed because he let his hand drop to his side and just smiled instead. “Thanks for listening. I know I kind of ramble.”

Steelbeak waited a few seconds to be sure that Fethry wasn’t going to make any sudden moves. Then he gave a shrug and followed Heron out.

It hadn’t been a hardship. Listening to weird undersea stuff passed the time. It was like catching a documentary on TV, without the meatheads that would grab the remote from you and change the channel to something else.

Black Heron laughed at Fethry as soon as they left the lab. "That guy," was all she managed to say before chuckles overtook her.

Steelbeak scowled. “What? What did he say that was so funny?” Was he the butt of someone else’s joke again? He'd make him go splat, if so.

Heron regained control of herself, but she was still grinning. “He didn’t have to say anything. It’s comical that he’s even here.”

The scowl receded and his brows knit in confusion. “I don’t —”

“You don’t get it, I know. Lucky for you, I’m in a good enough mood to explain. He’s Scrooge McDuck’s nephew. You remember, the guy you were supposed to get out of the arcade?”

“The big guy who wrecked one of my suits?”

“Ugh, no! He was the one wearing a top hat.” A frown flitted across her face, but her good mood was quick to reassert itself. Past failure meant little in the face of such a hilarious triumph.

“He came to us, wanting a job. He has no idea that we’re F.O.W.L. and no idea that we’re working against everything his family stands for. We’re holding him hostage, and he has no clue.” Another peal of laughter escaped Heron.

Steelbeak let out a chuckle as well, now that he was finally in on the joke. "Ahh, I get it. Classic dum-dum. What kind of idiot doesn't know who they're working for?"

The grin on Heron’s face slipped slightly.

"This should go without saying, but I know you so I'll say it anyway. Do not tell Fethry any details of your work, your missions, what we do here. Nada. Nothing."

"Well, duh. I know that. That's why they're called secret missions."

"Steelbeak, I once saw you brag about being a secret agent at a bar to try and get a date."

"And why not! They were cute!"

“And you wonder why your recreational leave is so limited.”

“What?”

“I’m saying dumb boys don’t get a lot of outdoors time.”

“Hey!”

A smirk moved across her face before she continued. “The director wants him to remain utterly oblivious, so secrecy is of the utmost importance. He’s not going to be happy if we have to lock him up or kill him for knowing too much.”

Steelbeak did not reach for his beak. He did not feel the slight dents that remained from trying to punch his own mouth open. “And we’re not just locking him up now, why?”

“Because the Ducks are easiest to manage when they think a situation is within their control!” Her voice was raised as decades of thwarted ambitions seeped into her tone.

Steelbeak was unimpressed. He could get just as angry, and he hadn’t needed years to get to that point.

“And what if he does ask what I do here?”

“Why would he ask? You’re hardly about to engage him in some deep conversation, are you?”

He couldn’t quite meet her eyes for some reason. “Well, no, but…”

“Oh, for larceny’s sake. If it does come up and you can’t avoid answering the question, just make something up. You’re an agent, do some lying.”

“... yeah, of course. I can do that.”

***

It doesn’t really sink in until later that night, back in his room, how Fethry answered all his questions without calling him, “Stupid.”

[orchidbreezefc]

OH SHIT YALL ARE WE PUBLICALLY TALKING ABOUT THE SHIT THE KFAM CREATORS PULL? IS THAT A THING WE’RE TALKING ABOUT NOW? I HAVE BEEN WAITING SO LONG FOR THIS YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

first: im not going to go into issues i have with the show itself. yall heard the helen keller episode and the walt storyline/the character voice a white dude used for him same as i did--my input won’t be necessary there i think. i also recommend the blog @kfam-tea​, thank you for your service, for being an archive for creator-based shit, the current snafu and their history, etc.

this is about my personal experiences with the creators. there’s plenty of behavior by the FANDOM that i don’t appreciate, especially in the official discord--where it’s specifically encouraged and cultivated--and maybe i’ll indulge myself with that in a separate post, but this i think will be more relevant to more folks’ interests and the current climate.

so. remember ep90, “if you’re hungry and you know it”? it’s the one where maggie calls in to apply and gets treated like shit by our protagonists for 15 minutes. comments are made about her breasts. they try to dissuade her from applying for the job posting they’ve been advertising because chet would sexually harass her and rather than address that they’d rather just.... warn off every female applicant? maggie through the conversation is trying to make amends for her wrongs (i.e. high school drama and attacking a guy who sexually harassed her so badly for years she quit her job) and talk about her efforts at recovery, and she is mocked, both in the way she is written and in the way sammy and ben talk to and about her.

it was bad. it was very sexist and bad, and nothing was said about it for a month (7/15-8/15), at which point ep92, “words: greater than pen, greater than sword” aired, which contained lily tearing sammy to shreds over it. ben wasn’t there, which was interesting, because it did create a dynamic where our resident socially aware lesbian (who solely bears the burden of educating people when they are being shitheads and is richly rewarded by being widely regarded as an unlikeable bitch by the fandom and many of the characters) rightfully confronts and gets an apology from a gay man for being half of an extremely misogynist shutdown of a woman. meanwhile, his hetero counterpart and unassailable purehearted fandom darling is not yelled at for his misogyny, and gets to have this Very Important Lesson relegated to him offscreen later. i mean, presumably? i’m pretty sure we never hear whether that actually happens.

still, it was a pretty thorough discussion of how gross that conversation had been, and it was addressed and apologized for in the show itself by the characters (or one of them), which was more than i expected. it regained some lost trust. it was clear to me that the kfam team had received the same sort of outcry from the fandom that i had seen in more private servers, and these were their amends. i decided to tweet at them applauding the effort. this is how that worked out:

[ID: a tweet by me that reads: “@ KingFallsAM hey.... today's episode was good. this was a good way to respond to fan criticism and the apology is appreciated. thanks.”

the official kfam account quote tweeted this to respond: “This was an intended storyline, we don’t course correct. We have ALWAYS had imperfect characters that learn and grow and will continue to. Also... we only saw one tweet even mention it. But thanks?“

a fellow fan, whose username and icon have been redacted, replied to the official kfam account’s response with: “I feel like there’s a less sarcastic way to respond to this tweet. I’m a diehard fan, however I saw quite a bit of criticism about thesexism[sic] in the recent episodes. I too was under the impression that it was a course correction, regardless I am glad that there is character growth“]

so. that was a cool thing. like, i do owe that other fan my life and will show up for them in their hour of need for being the only one to publically stick up for me despite being a stranger, but that sure was a quote tweet that a multi-thousand-followers account used to dunk on my under-100-followers account for trying to pay them a compliment!

i mean, really. the passive-aggressive ‘but thanks?’ at the end? and them saying not that they didnt course correct in this case where followup (a month later) was planned, but that they don’t course-correct, as in they never do that--was a clear statement of ‘we don’t accept fan criticism or feedback on writing OR representation and take it into account, ever’. hey kfam, pro tip: when you say 'thanks for accepting our apology i guess' it really sounds like you didnt feel like you needed to apologize in the first place. which is a pretty bold attitude to take about an episode where a character apologizes for being sexist.

like no wonder you only saw one tweet about it if that’s the attitude you present toward criticism (and, as @kfam-tea​‘s blog thoroughly proves, it is and has been, consistently). i know the risk of backlash is definitely why i hadn’t said anything about 90 in public up to that point. but yeah, 'nobody told us that episode was disgusting in our samebrain discord server that contains the literal creators who have a history of backlash, so can you really say there was fan criticism at all? maybe it was just in your head. after all, if we did something wrong with the intention to correct it a month later, did we really do anything wrong in the first place? checkmate'

tl;dr im not surprised by the new developments. my hearts go out to the MINORS, who are specifically cultivated as an audience by the sfw policy of the official server, who were publically chewed out by the grown ass author on twitter for requesting tags, warnings, or really any sort of discretion or consideration at all on nsfw content.

p.s.: here’s something kyle said on the discord in response to a conversation in which i criticized ben’s behavior during an episode (i.e. said he should apologize and take responsibility for a hurtful thing he did even though he did it by accident, or at least have it acknowledged in the show or the fandom that he did a hurtful thing--another post, perhaps) and the rest of the discord dogpiled me until i cried and shut down and stopped defending myself or speaking at all because i couldn’t deal with inviting any more argument:

[ID: a discord message from kyle that reads: “Thank you all for talking about this maturely and with your words. I’ve personally never seen that heard[sic???] of this scene with that POV attached but that’s the beautiful thing about this show and shows like it, is[sic] that we all kinda copy & paste ourselves on these characters and situations at times. Everybody’s opinions on the situation is[sic] valid with their own personal context of the scene.” two people have reacted with blue heart emojis.]

how magnanimous, kyle. wouldn’t have described the preceding argument as civil even if i did understand how anyone could possibly do anything on a discord text channel that didn’t qualify as using their words, but thanks? somebody literally DM’d me to ask if i was okay because without having ever talked to me one-on-one before they could tell i was deeply distraught by the end, but i’m glad you got to be the benevolent author and shake hands with both sides for a swift shutdown of dissent well executed. /s

[wolfpawn]

Hiding In Plain Sight, Chapter 1

Story Summary - Imagine coming from a line of nobility or royalty and being in an arranged marriage with Loki in an attempt to strengthen your kingdom / alliance with Asgard. You’re not entirely on board with the idea but figured that the best you could do was to get to know your fiancé. You form an agreement with Frigga for you to pose as Loki’s personal servant for a few months so you can get to know who Loki really is – beyond the veil of his responsibility to the Asgardian throne, behind all the masks he wears when facing the public, to really know who Loki is behind closed doors as you slowly fall for each other.How long will you keep up the ruse with the God of Lies?

Chapter Summary - Raven fears what sort of man she is to marry so she devises a plan to see if she can learn what Loki is like when he thinks no one is watching. 

Previous Chapter - Not applicable for this chapter

Tags - @peppermint-j 

Request if you wish to be tagged

NOTES :

I am supposed to be working on Pride and Prejudice, but that didn't work out, this came to me when I read it. Then it was supposed to be a One-shot, now I have 5 chapters done, so who knows. I don't even try to fight it some days, I really don't.

Ljósálfar - Norse word for Light Elf. Dökkálfar - Norse word for Dark Elf.

Bran is Welsh for Raven, usually a boys name so for this, because Raven translates accordingly, I am using both. Breanna is not Irish for Raven, contrary to some online US children's names sites.

Raven was worried and if she was honest, she felt she was right to be so. It was no secret that Alfheim’s need for Aesir assistance had led to a deal being brokered that had many great advantages to it, along with of course, some costs. One of which, though depending who you discussed it with, it being an advantage or a negative was heavily disputable, was her betrothal to a man she had never met face-to-face in her life past childhood, that man being the Allfather’s second son and renowned Trickster, Loki. Reports on the prince were sketching a very peculiar man with no set answer as to his personality and demeanour. To all, he was someone different and that to Raven was the concern. She wanted to know who Loki was as a man but had not been given much by way of answers.

One person to give her a somewhat rounded though a slightly biased account was Frigga, Allmother, queen of Asgard but also, Loki’s mother. She wondered if the queen, who spoke very highly of her son, was truly the best one to give an accurate description of him. When she asked the foreign queen if there was any manner to see for herself what the prince was like, what he genuinely like, they hatched a small, if slightly devious plan.

After some minor training as to the ways of staff of the Aesir palace, Raven was disguised as a maid so to learn of Loki’s true personality for herself to see if she could come to care for the man she was being forced to call her husband. She was reluctant to get married to someone she hardly knew and felt that this was the best manner in which to rectify that. She wanted to know how he would treat those that were supposedly beneath him as she felt that that was a way to accurately assess the man she had to wed.

The Aesir princes had not been to Alfheim since their youth so they had no idea what Raven looked like. Loki, as she had been, was merely informed of the agreement without having been present for it. It would allow her to remain unknown to the prince as she learnt a few things about him.

Raven looked over her uniform and eyed her neatly tied back hair. Elves never tied their hair fully, it always remained as loose as possible but being in the employ of the Aesir royal family, she needed her hair to be out of the way, so she tied it up neatly and examined her work. Satisfied that it was acceptable, she walked the route Frigga had used her seidr to show her to allow her to Loki’s rooms. His previous maid had been given some paid time off to go see her family, not aware that a plan had been hatched for her absence to be required.

She walked through the correct halls, bedsheets in hand, ready for what she expected to be her first real meeting with her betrothed, even if she was the only one of them privy to that particular fact.

She knocked as she was instructed to do before entering. The room was silent, signifying that if Loki was there, he was not to the front of his quarters. Raven looked around the room in an analytical manner. She studied the different paintings and tapestries on the walls, the varied books and sculptures that littered different areas of the room, it seemed somewhat scattered, yet entirely planned and structured.

Raven was so busy looking around, she hardly noticed the figure standing in the doorway between the two rooms studying her in a curious manner. There was no denying who it was in front of her, Raven knew what Loki looked like from her very few memories she had of them as children, not that they would have given a very accurate picture to go off for how he would look as an adult but also because of the images that Frigga had shown her of him. “Your Highness.” She curtsied at him, noting the slightest nod of acknowledgement of her actions. “Forgive me, I was just assessing the rooms as it is my first proper time in them. I wished to know where most items were placed so I could ensure to remember where they went at a later time should they require my putting them back for you.”

“I see.” Loki walked from the doorway to in front of her. “I was worried that I had an opportunistic thief on my hands.”

Raven’s eyes widened, not in fear but in insult. “Not at all, Your Highness, I would never insult my own honour in such a manner.”

If he was honest with himself, Loki was startled that she had not apologised or attempted to plead innocence and forgiveness for such an accusation being made at her but instead, she showed rambunctiousness and bite in return. “Good to know. Now that we have established that much at least, we can get onto the less formal issues, like you informing me as to who you are and why in Odin’s name you are in my rooms assessing the placing of my belongings?”

“I am your temporary personal maid, Your Highness.” Raven was uncertain what to think. Loki was not being as rude and aggressive as some led her to believe yet he was, by no means, overly cordial and nice either.

“I see. And dare I ask where is my other personal maid, Tatiana?”

“She required time off to see her family, Your Highness. I do not know the finer details but I seem to recall that her parents are aged and she wishes to spend some time with them.”

Loki nodded. “Yes, her father is indeed an older fellow, older than my father by a few centuries at least. Tatiana was saying he has not been the healthiest of late. Hopefully, it is nothing serious. How long is this arrangement supposedly in place or does she require an open-ended break from work?”

Raven was startled. Entirely contradictory to the behaviour he had displaced a fraction of a moment before, Loki implied that he knew something personal and cared somewhat for the wellbeing of his employee’s family. “I would be lying if I said I knew, Your Highness. All I am aware of is that she is currently unavailable and I am the one chosen to fill her role until her return, though I am very much informed that she will wish for her position back upon her return.”

“So, we have established that you are not a thief, a good thing too as to have to kill a Light Elf when I am supposed to become more involved with Alfheim in a more personal manner in the very near future would never look well. We have also established your position as my personal maid for the time being and indeed the current situation with your being here, that just leaves one other integral matter?” Raven cocked her head slightly in curiosity as to what that could possibly be. “Your name.”

“My name?”

“You have informed me of much but have at no stage given me a name for you.”

“Oh.” Raven had not thought of that. She knew that with the name of a creature that his father had two as his personal pets, if Loki had heard her name as his betrothed, he would not soon forget it and it could leave her in the very precarious position of being exposed to her betrothed. “Did I not? Forgive me, for I thought I had.”

“You have not.” Loki insisted. “And still seem reluctant to tell me as to what your name is.”

“Branna.” She blurted out before even thinking over what she said.

“Branna?”

“Yes, Your Highness. Branna.”

“That is not Ljósálfar, is it? What does it mean?” He asked curiously.

“No, Your Highness, and it means raven but you see, my mother adores ravens and indeed all corvids but the Princess of Alfheim you see, her name is…”

“Raven, I am aware of such, yes.” Loki’s expression did not give away any thoughts he had of her.

“Yes, and to copy her name directly would be seen as unimaginative and in many respects, insulting to her as our princess, so she went for the Dökkálfar version of it since her grandmother was Dökkálfar, so it made sense to her and it allowed her to do as she wished.”

“That was quite smart of her.”

“Yes.” Raven did not think it wise to push it too far. Loki had a name as a Liesmith from different sources. He could use his words to mould a situation to his liking and knew how to intelligently shape a lie to suit his needs. She knew that if she dug herself into a hole with lies, it would not bode well for her. Branna was the Dökkálfar for Raven. Her maternal grandmother was a Dark Elf and did indeed refer to her as Branna.

“Well, Branna, so long as you do the duties asked of you, I can see no issues between us until Tatiana’s return. Who knows, perhaps you could give me some perspective on the Light Elf way of life. It seems I will have to become somewhat adept at it.”

Raven swallowed slightly. There was no denying it that time. Loki was none-too-keen to be wed to a Light Elf. “Yes, Your Highness.” She nodded, not looking him in the face so he did not see the sad look in her eyes.

“I need to leave for a short time, just tidy everything for now,” Loki ordered before walking out of the room.

*

Raven worked on the room diligently. Growing up, she had never been allowed to do much for herself, which irked her greatly. There were some things she knew she would never be good at, cooking being one such thing. She managed to set fire to a bowl of porridge once. She loved to sew and embroider. It was seen as naff but she loved small intricate designs but such things were seen as maid’s duties. She also liked to tidy her belongings herself but any time she did so was admonished for such. She was the daughter of the king. The only daughter, amidst four sons. She had been something of an anomaly in the family, never truly feeling like she fit in. Her brothers had their places, the eldest Johann was to be king, the next, Richard to be his general, the third, Gerard to be the Lord of the lowlands, a rich agricultural part of the realm and the youngest, Kieran decided to become a healer. Then, amidst them all, a girl. Her parents did not know what to do with her. Very few Light Elf kings had daughters. They did not seem to be a common occurrence leaving Raven to be left with a path to be given in life which caused the situation she was now in, betrothed to Loki as part of a deal that would strengthen the bond between the two realms. She tidied diligently as she thought over everything she had learnt in her few minutes speaking with her intended. While she cleaned, she looked at different artefacts and trinkets as well as books and notes as she tidied. The beautifully elegant writing that matched the ink vials she saw on the table told her it was Loki’s. She loved handwriting, she analysed such things as she felt that it told a lot about a being. Loki’s was artistic, yet it was uniform, which made sense, her analysis of his rooms told her that was true also. Then there was the manner in which he wrote capital letters, unique, but she imagined that he was such an individual himself. She doubted many were as artistic. Such traits were liked in Light Elves, which should have given her hope, instead, with thinking of his dislike when referening his soon-to-be marriage, it filled her with apprehension.

[rrloading184]

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[sharkfish]

ps i loved this one

(rereading bookmarks edition part 2)

(part 1)

i’ve been rereading stories from my bookmarks as a comfort thing. i’m getting real deep in there to stuff i haven’t (re)read for years, and damn do i have good taste. the ones i’ve read recently that you should, too:

(under the cut so i’m not that asshole that makes you scroll past an endless post)

Best Laid Plans by Persephoneshadow

Things are going well for Dean: he's landed the biggest design job of his architectural career and is about to get final approval on the project despite how difficult the development company, personified by Castiel Novak, has made it. It's not bad for a moody omega...except things are also going terribly for Dean because he has to get in a plane and fly to a meeting, and course ends up in heat a few hours before. Luckily, Castiel is there to help and both men discover the good that can come when nothing goes quite as intended.

i don’t know why i’m such a ho for stories where dean thinks cas hates him, but cas secretly adores him and is just a little “rusty” on his “people skills.” i’m also a ho for stories where dean is a gd skilled genius but his dumb ass still thinks his work sucks and/or anything good is due to other people instead of himself. and also, heat boning. 

Confessions of a Cam Boy by MsCaptainWinchester (rons_pigwidgeon)

Dean runs a cam show to pay his way through marketing school, but he's about to start an internship that he doesn't know will change his life. Watching Dean's show is Castiel's favorite way to wind down after a stressful day at Sandover Bridge & Iron. When Cas comes to work one day and finds his favorite cam boy setting coffee on his desk, he is completely thrown. Will Dean finish his internship without knowing his favorite viewer is his new boss, or will he be able to see through Cas' non-existent poker face and figure it out?

omg poor cas is soooo awkward and dean is weirded out about how much his new boss seems to dislike him and then it’s super sexy >:) 

For Science by shiphitsthefan

“Think of it like an experiment," says Dean. "You’re testing a hypothesis as to whether or not a desirable response can be achieved through the stimulation of the anus via the application of a willing volunteer’s muscular hydrostat.”

Cas raises an eyebrow. “Are you actually trying to use the scientific method to talk me into letting you lick my asshole?”

everyone is such adorable nerds in this one. it’s a fic about rimming, but it’s also about love and discovering yourself and acceptance. it explores cas’s realization through his connection with dean that he’s not straight up ace but more grey/demi - and that doesn’t mean he was “faking” being ace up until he met dean. 

Friends with Benefits with Tentacles by andimeantittosting (Saylee)

Dean's never been embarrassed about his porn collection before, but that was before he found Cas holding his prized copy of Sweet Princess Asuka and the Tentacles of Pleasure. Dean finds himself sweating bullets—because this is Cas, sweet, nerdy Cas. Cas, his friend. Cas, his roommate. Cas, his—only slightly out-of-control—crush.

Cas, with his big, blue eyes and muscular arms and perpetual sex hair.

Cas, with his tentacles.

The last thing he expects is for Cas to suggest they experiment together.

there are not enough tentacle fics out there and i 100000% approve of this addition to the tag. i love that dean is out there legitimately studying porn, and the tentacles are obviously super fun, and there were parts where my heart hurt so bad, all around a damn fine fic. 

Grown-Ups Making Grown-Up Choices by Carrieosity

Dean is a grown-ass man - he can take perfectly good care of himself, thank you very much. Except that sometimes the easier or more fun choices aren't always the right or best ones, and, all right, maybe thinking ahead and working the long game isn't his strongest suit. It's fine! He's fine.

When he meets Castiel, he realizes that flying by the seat of his pants may not be the best way to attract the super-serious (gorgeous, funny, genius) Alpha. Dean's shrink has been telling him he needs to start making "grown-up choices," and if that's what he has to think about in order to make Cas fall for him, then he'll give it a whirl.

i LOVE this fic (series). i feel so hard for dean feeling like he’s too old for his life to still be a mess, but i also felt sad for him that he thought he had to make all these hardcore changes - basically turn himself into a different person - to be worthy of cas’s attentions. i fucking adore cas in this, and i nearly cried just thinking about all the damn peppers they eat, and i want to read it again right now. 

If I Run by Anonymous

"Dean Winchester is a red-blooded American male. He lifts all the things. He aims for functional strength. He counts his macros and makes fun of curlbros. He is not a member of the Tarahumara tribe and he will not read Born to Run, no matter how many times Sam tells him to, because Starting Strength is the only book Dean will ever fucking need."

***

Wherein a friendly competition with the mysterious ThursdaysAngel turns into a sexy selfie-trading spree that motivates Dean Winchester to train for his first marathon.

i really really love this fic and reread it pretty often tbh. it only became “anonymous” pretty recently and i’m so curious about why!! regardless, this fic is a really great time!!! 

It's Always More Than Once (Before It Takes) by squeemonster

The first time it happens, it's because of boredom. Or, at least that's what Dean tells himself to justify it. Boredom and Dean Winchester are a dangerous combination, especially when you factor in beer, a raging libido, and laziness.

dean: my dudes, is it gay to do sexy stuff with your male bff? cuz i’m totally straight. but also, having sex with my male bff. 

I Wanna Get Outside (Of Me) by emwebb17

Dean is a novice in the dom/sub world asked by his employer as a desperate last resort to be a sub for his recluse of a brother, Castiel. Castiel is a diagnosed OCD suffering from PTSD and agoraphobia, mysophobia, and dystychiphobia. Needless to say—he’s a mess who hasn’t stepped out of his home in literally seven years. The only times Gabriel can see traces of the way his brother used to be is when he feels in control—specifically when he has control over a sub. However, due to his idiosyncrasies and paranoia, keeping a sub around has been impossible. Enter Dean, who’s not a very traditional submissive, to try his hand at subbing for the hermit.

you know how sometimes you read a fic, and it takes ages to get yourself out of that world? even though you’re finished, you’re still right there with him? this is one of those fics. i reread it a couple weeks ago and fell asleep thinking about it last night. i cry a lot reading this one. 

Living in Agony by ChasingRabbits

Dean Winchester's life is... well, it's not great. He's a gym teacher, he's in his thirties, and he can't seem to keep any part of his life straight. When the aftermath of a one-night stand goes awry, Dean is dragged kicking and screaming out of his cozy little closet and into the harsh light of reality.

Enter: Castiel Novak, the new history teacher, who knows full well that life gets crappy when you don't allow yourself to live it in the way it needs to be lived.

there aren’t a lot of stories that deal with themes of mental illness, and a lot of them read like an episode of degrassi where everything wraps up in 30min to never be discussed again. this story is honest in that there’s no easy out. there’s medication and therapy and supportive people, but that’s not always enough. it’s a story about how you don’t have to be mentally ill to be fucked up, and while people can’t fix each other, they can help each other. content note: references to a pre-story suicide attempt. 

Oddly Shaped Empty by jemariel

Dean grew up thinking -- knowing -- he'd be an alpha.

Until he failed to present. As a beta, he has no mating cycle, no noticeable pheromones, none of the physical markers that are so important in a world of alphas and omegas. He's out of place. How is he supposed to navigate his relationships and find love when he doesn't fit into the neatly-defined boxes he's used to?

By the time he meets his new roommate, Castiel, he's more or less given up on finding a mate. He wears his secondary gender like a chip on his shoulder. But you never know what the future holds, who will come into your life, and how they might change it forever.....

Queer themes, finding identity, reconciling the past, and a whole lot of smut.

y’all know @jemariel is a gd genius, but i’m particularly obsessed with their fics that use abo to explore queer identify & experiences. i hold my breath reading most of this fic and also cry. 

Steal my Breath by Sincestiel

“Tighter, Dean, please,” Cas urges throwing his head back to rest on Dean’s shoulder. Dean squeezes. He doesn’t know why Cas wants this or even what the appeal is, but he always comes harder when he’s struggling to breathe.

what’s on the tin. a quick lil breathplay fic that is thoroughly enjoyable. 

Unsolicited by Dangerousnotbroken

In which Dean Winchester gets an unsolicited dick pic from an unknown sender which is both totally not disappointing in that it's a really nice dick pic, and incredibly disappointing in that it's clearly a downloaded picture of his favorite porn star.

There's absolutely no way it's actually this porn star sending it to him, right?

Right?

this is a destiel classic and i feel like anyone who isn’t new here has probably read it. but here’s your reminder that this is a great fic and you should (re)read it. 

Wordplay by Dangerousnotbroken @dangerousnotbroken​

“I don’t understand why talking dirty is such a big deal for you humans,” Cas complains, apropos of nothing.

it’s a “cas learning about sex” and also dirty talk, which are both things i’m really into!! and DNB is a genius so that’s even better. 

if you enjoy these fics (and you should), please give the writer some love via kudos and/or comments. <3

ps - as always, if i didn’t tag the writer and you know their tumblr, please tag in the comments. i don’t think there’s a writer alive who wouldn’t be happy to be on a rec list. :)

[the-weeping-author]

Hate To Love chapter 1

A/N: This is my first series thank you guys so much for liking my last three fics, I hope you guys enjoy this series.

This series will include: bullying, angst, fighting/arguing, fluff, smut. There will be a Steve vs Joyce show down.

Parings: Steve Harrington x Sara Byers

Trigger warnings: none in this chapter maybe not feeling loved??

Tag list: @ahoy-stevieboy @thehair-ington @galactic-kitten-nonsense @linkispink1995 @theworldisugly-22 @harringtown @phoebethepheebs @spiritsent

(Please don’t copy my fics as your own also I don’t own anything about the stranger tings franchise.)

Please enjoy 😌

Saturday November 5th, 1983

I’ve been home one day, I’ve already got all of my stuff unpacked into the spots I wanted my stuff to go then I decided to go look at the town I once knew like it was apart of me but now with my recent weight loss it feels like it’s foreign to me.

People looked at me like they didn’t know me anymore. Like I wasn’t Sara Byers anymore. I had to remake myself from the person I used to be, I had told my mother about what Lonnie had said about me to that woman over the phone.

I had to stop her from calling and giving him a piece of her mind, I was out and about so I could start putting in applications at any job that would take me. I took a deep breath, walked into a gas station that had a help wanted sign in the window.

I put the biggest smile on my face I could manage walking up to the person behind the register.

“Hi I’m here to apply for the position that y’all need to fill.”

The lady with curly hair smiled at me then popped her gum.

“Okay honey are you good with people?”

I smile shrugging.

“I’d like to think I am.”

She looked at me then at the door when someone came in.

“Alright when can you start?”

I looked at her while my eyes widened, excitement washing over my body.

“I can start right now if you need me too.”

She nodded, telling me to come behind the counter so she could show me how everything worked.

After she showed me everything she took down the help wanted sign then assured me she’d be back.

After she left it was kinda slow, I was behind the counter reading a magazine when a customer put the stuff they planned on but on the counter.

I started to ring them up when I heard my best friends familiar voice.

“Sara?”

My head snatched up to see my best friend in middle school barb.

“Oh hey barb how have you been?”

She smiled at me.

“I’ve been great did you lose weight I barely recognized you?”

I smiled at her, started playing with my hair.

“U-Uh yeah I did do I look bad?”

She quickly shook her head at me.

“Hell no girl you look fantastic I can already tell hearts are going to be broken, I don’t mind seeing them as long as one of them aren’t mine.”

I let out a loud laugh which made her laugh.

“Barb you know I could never stop being your friend.”

She smiled at me while I gave her her total.

“I know Sara and that’s why you’re the best.”

I smiled and I flipped my hair.

“Yeah I know.”

She gasped at me.

“Who is this confident teenager in front of me? What have you done with my Sara?”

I smiled at her then let out a giggle.

“The old Sara has gone out of business. This is the new and improved Sara.”

She laughed at me then hugged me over the counter.

“Well Sara I guess I’ll see you at school tomorrow.”

I smiled then nodded at her.

“Alright barb.”

I thought having the friend reunion was over until Tina walked in around six thirtyish. She had grabbed some snacks which I assumed was for some party that was either going on or she was throwing. She walked up to the register and smiled.

“Oh my god Sara? As in Sara Byers?”

I looked up at her then smiled at her.

“It is I, in the flesh Tina.”

She shook her head at me then looked me up and down.

“Damn girl you’ve gotten hot, I mean you’ve always been hot shit but damn this brings it to a new level.”

I laughed at her as I scanned her items.

“Alright Tina your total is $10.27.”

She smiled at me while she put a twenty dollar bill on the counter.

“Alright honey your change is $9.73.”

She walked away, gasping immediately stopping in her tracks.

“Oh by the way Sara there’s a party going on tonight at my house, I know, I know you don’t do parties but you should show the boys at Hawkins high what they are going to be seeing a lot of this year.”

I shook my head at her.

“No way Tina, I don’t want anyone to see what I look like yet, I want them to see that Humpty Dumpty got a makeover.”

She simply just shrugged at me.

“Okay fine but you owe me.”

I smiled at her.

“Yeah, yeah tell who you want that I’ve had a makeover I’m pretty sure they won’t believe you anyways.”

She shook her head as she walked out of the gas station, I went back to reading my magazine. The rest of the day went by really fast, the woman I soon learned was named Emily came back around 7 to show me how to close. That is when I would close the gas station.

I got in the car my grandma had left me in her will, I drove home. When I got there I saw the lights on and Jonathan's car.

“Great.”

I thought to myself while I got out the car, I walked to the front door and took a deep breath unknowing what could happen behind this door. I knew Johnathan was pissed and hurt at me leaving but I was back, he had no right feeling how he did towards me.

I took a deep breath then walked into the house, immediately I was pulled into a hug by Will.

“Hey little dude I’ve missed you.”

He buried his face into my neck when he pulled away his eyes were watery.

“I thought I’d never see you again.”

I shook my head as a stray tear went on his cheek, I quickly wiped it away.

“No buddy what would make you feel that way?”

He looked up at me and bit his bottom lip and took a shakeup breath.

“Cause you left with dad, since he doesn’t ever come around why would you?”

I felt my stomach drop at his words they stung, but I knew he didn’t mean to hurt my feelings but he did. He was my little brother and I’m supposed to be here for him and I left him.

My mother was next to bring me into a hug, she rubbed my back then she kissed my forehead.

“I knew you’d be back, I just knew it.”

I smiled at her then she pulled away.

“Did I ever say that I’m sorry for what you overheard Lonnie saying, I know I can’t control what he said but I can make you feel better?”

She smiled at me while I raised my eyebrow amused at her.

“What’s that momma?”

She put her thumb under my chin and gently rubbed it with her thumb.

“Well since I gotta work tonight why don’t we eat ice cream while Johnathan, you and I watch a scary movie?”

I smiled at her until she mentioned Johnathan.

“Yeah I don’t think Johnathan would like that idea.”

She furrowed her eyebrows at me confusion evident on her face.

“Why would you think that Sara?”

I sighed looking at my hands.

“Well because he hasn’t spoken to me since I got back.”

She smiled at me while she rubbed my shoulders.

“Oh honey he’ll get over it he’s just hurt and being stubborn right now.”

“Who’s stubborn?” Johnathan asked As he entered the living room.

“Oh no one.” She turned towards me and made some dramatic face causing me to giggle.

“Hey Johnathan I’m working late tomorrow night so can you please watch Will?”

He sighed but agreed as he walked into the kitchen I decided to show our mother what I was talking about.

“Hey Johnathan.”

Not only did he not speak back but he didn’t even look my way, I turned to look at my mom.

“See what I’m talking about?”

My mother smiled Sympathetically at me while he walked back to his room.

“Honey just give him time y’all are twins y’all will come together again.”

*Time skip*

I was laying in bed listening to some Cyndi lauper record when I heard a knock on my door.

“It’s open.”

Johnathan quickly walked into my room, I got off my bed and turned my record down.

“Hey so Sara I need to ask a favor.”

I raised an eyebrow at him as I sat back down on my bed.

“Oh okay what’s up?”

He took in a breath then sat on the edge of my bed.

“I need you to watch Will tomorrow night while I pick up a shift.”

I looked at him blankly.

“Excuse me?”

He looked at me like I was speaking another language.

“I said can you watch Will-“

“I heard what you said Johnathan but why talk to me now? You’ve had the last day to talk to me, now that you want something I’m your best friend?”

He opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water gasping for breath.

“You know what Johnathan I don’t mind watching him tomorrow night, all I’m going to say to you is don’t just talk to me when you want something.”

He nodded mumbling a sorry then walking out my room without another word.

I sighed and decided to pick out my outfit for Monday. I knew it was only Saturday, I wanted to make sure I looked my best for Monday.

After I picked the outfit I was cleaning the house when Will had come rushing out of his room, he threw on his coat but as soon as he opened the door I stopped him.

“Hey little bro what’s the rush?”

He stopped in a halt turning to look at me flashing me a smile.

“Oh just over to mike wheelers, mom knows I’ll be back before ten okay?”

I looked at him and raised a brow then decided to pretend hurt.

“Oh okay I guess I’m too lame to hang out with now.”

Panic was written all over his face as he shook his head no at me.

“N-no not at all it’s just we have a DND campaign we started, the guys wouldn’t understand because we all promised we wouldn’t miss a campaign.

“Alright well did you let Johnathan know cause I have to work so I’ll see you later okay?”

He smiled then nodded at me.

“Yes Sara Johnathan knows I love you, I’ll see you later.”

I smiled then gasped.

“Will wait.”

He turned around halfway out the door, raised his eyebrow at me.

“Yes Sara?”

“You forgot our brother sister handshake.”

He quickly ran over to me then, put out his hand then I slapped his palm, we both put our hands in front of us like we were holding wants to hop around in a circle then hooked both of our pinkies together then kissed the side of our hand then he ran out the door.

“Love you Sara.”

I smiled after him leaving out the front door whispering to myself.

“Love you too nerd.”

A/N: sorry this took so long I was trying to make it perfect even though I feel like it’s not please let me know if you’d like to be added to my tag list request are open thanks. ~Destiny ❤️

[damienthepious]

i am out of ways to say hi it’s tuesday fic time. but hi, it’s tuesday! fic time.

Scattered On My Shore (Chapter 8)

[Ch 1] [Ch 2] [Ch 3] [Ch 4] [Ch 5] [Ch 6] [Ch 7] [ao3] [Ch 9] [Ch 10] [Ch 11] [Ch 12] [Ch 13] [Ch 14] [Ch 15] [Ch 16] [Ch 17] [Ch 18] [Ch 19]

Fandom: The Penumbra Podcast

Relationship: Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla, Sir Damien/Rilla

Characters: Rilla, Lord Arum, Sir Damien

Additional Tags: Second Citadel, Lizard Kissin’ Tuesday, Pre-Relationship, (for the three of them. it’s established r/d), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Injury, Injury Recovery,  Hurt/Comfort,  (this will also be), Enemies to Lovers, (for damien and arum eventually lol)

Fic Summary: Strange things wash up out of the lake near Rilla’s hut, on occasion. But this monster… this monster is certainly the strangest.

Chapter Summary: Rilla is starting to feel a little like they're bonding. Arum is unconvinced. Damien is on his own journey.

Chapter Notes: Fam this one gets weird. Chapter specific warnings for overt threats of violence, characters being restrained, implications of a canon-compliant death, and I think that's it? Oh forgive me, this chapter is long and my day has been even longer. Hey, I love you. <3

~

Rilla fills a basket with anything she thinks might interest him even a little. She doesn't have much of a fiction section (most of it is borrowed from or gifted by Damien, actually), so she just kinda scoops that entire little shelf in with the rest.

"Obviously I don't know what you might like," she says later in the afternoon when he's woken again, and he stares at her in alarm over the assorted pile as she sets it down next to the cot, where he'll be able to reach without much strain. "But I figured that now that you're awake more often, you might want some reading material."

"I don't-" he sputters, frowning down at the books in indignation. "I cannot imagine any human storybooks could hold my attention for a single moment."

"That's fine," Rilla says with a shrug. "I'm pretty sure I don't have any kids' reading material, so you should be safe on that front. There's a bit of fiction in there, but that's not really my thing so I can't give you any personal recommendations there. Mostly it's field guides, bestiaries, treatises on certain scientific concepts, collections of recipes, censuses of certain herb families, medical guides- just a whole bunch about a whole bunch, really. If you get bored enough, I'm sure something in there will be worth a read," she says casually, and then while he's still stammering through a growl she gives him a bright, disarming smile (he actually pulls his head back, blinking) and then she skips right back to the door. "I've got an experiment I gotta keep an eye on for an hour or so, I'm sure you can keep yourself out of trouble for that long, but if you need me just shout, okay?"

He stares at her, mouth hanging just slightly open, so she grins a little wider and leaves him to it, keeping the door cracked just an inch or so as she goes.

He'll never pick a single one of the damn things up if she's there to gloat about it, but if she just leaves him to stew in his own inactivity unsupervised for a while, she's sure the temptation right there next to him will do the trick.

Sure enough, the next time she comes in (current pretense: a little cadre of plants by the window require watering. Could it have waited? Almost certainly), he's pretending to sleep (she can tell the difference) and the books are definitely rifled through. She's almost positive that it's at least one tome lighter, actually, and she's pretty confident that if she snooped she'd find the missing book tucked into the covers or under the lizard's pillow.

When she comes in with dinner he's given up the pretense on his end, scowling and waving one particular book in the air between them.

"What is this nonsense? " he snarls. "This information is spurious at best, Amaryllis. Some entries are passable, perhaps, but clearly you know nothing about-"

She tilts her head to try to figure out which book he's taken such offense at, and she's moderately unsurprised to see that it's one of the bestiaries. Okay, fair.

"Which ones are wrong?" she asks as she sets his food down on the table beside him, making no effort to disguise her enthusiasm, and he pauses, blinking at her. "I had Damien snag that from a library in the Citadel so I could make my own copy- with corrections, obviously. Actually, hang on-"

She spins on her heel and jogs to retrieve her half-written pile of unbound notes and her recorder from the front room, and she's already recording and shuffling through the pages when she returns.

"Which ones are bunk?" she asks with relish. "Frankly I've never trusted that author, I don't think he ever actually came within ten miles of the Western Wastes. His descriptions of western monsters always seemed the most vague, and they don't match up with other reports and firsthand accounts I'm aware of."

Arum snorts. "That stands to reason , " he growls, and then he smacks the page with the back of a hand. "Sickle-Claws are feathered, obviously, and half the size he has claimed."

"I knew it," she says, pulling the stool close and sitting by the bed. "That fraud wouldn't know an Everdead if someone whipped a branch back in his face."

He laughs again, apparently just as amused by that mental image as Rilla is, and then he starts flipping through the book, pointing out mistakes and false claims and outright fabrications with a smug sort of pleasure, and Rilla shows him her own notes, her amendments and additions from her own research, and he wrinkles his snout but he can't seem to find a complaint to voice, except specifically regarding her sideline notes on the magic involved in certain creatures.

"That isn't how magic works, Amaryllis." He shakes his head. "You can't predict it, because it is by definition unpredictable. If you try to shove it into a single labeled box all you will do is cut your hands in the attempt. Humans cannot possibly comprehend the true incomprehensibility of the larger universe."

Rilla raises an eyebrow. "I can comprehend quite a lot, Arum."

"Perhaps," he says with a sneer. "But if you expect magic to conform to consistent rules like your other natural and mathematical laws, you will be sorely disappointed," he hisses, gesturing to another book from the pile. "Magic is larger than that. It is outside of such constraints, as the Universe itself is."

"Just because it has different rules, doesn't mean it's incomprehensible-"

"No, no-" he shakes his head sharply and then then winces.

"Careful, Arum, c'mon-"

"Hush, it is simply sore, little doctor. As I was saying- magic does not have different rules. There are no rules. "

"Everything has rules, Arum. It's just a matter of figuring them out, regardless of how complex or granular-"

"Your assumption that everything in the Universe can be understood is precisely why you will never be able to understand, human. You cannot see outside your own level. I have moved beyond that."

Rilla frowns, resisting the urge to roll her eyes. "Cool. Good for you."

He chokes, almost a third laugh. "That- you ridiculous little-"

"I'm sure all that big picture stuff is real fun, Arum, and if you actually tried to explain any of it I'm sure it would be fascinating as hell, but if it doesn't have structure, if it can't be used reliably, I don't really see the point."

"It- it is not meant to be used, Amaryllis, it simply is."

"See, and that's cool too, but my needs as a doctor and a researcher mean that I'm less interested in the whole cosmic mystery and more interested in practical application," she says, tapping the book in his claws. "I learn the rules so that I understand how they can be used. If there aren't any rules- well, that's not exactly going to expand my toolkit, is it? Either it's understandable and useful to me, or you're right and it's incomprehensible, which means it's not much more than a curiosity, y'know?"

He frowns more deeply, turning his face away from her and making a noncommittal noise.

She pokes at the book again, and he blinks at her warily. "Hey. What about this one? I've never seen any other documentation of Syokoy as far northwest as he claims."

His snout wrinkles again, but his posture relaxes slightly as he growls into another scathing correction, and Rilla relaxes too. It's almost easy, like this. Almost comfortable.

~

One thing that's become more awkward now that Arum is consistently lucid: bathing.

And, like, Rilla is a professional, obviously. She's needed to give sponge baths to bed-bound patients more times than she could count, and she's already bathed him once while he was much less coherent, but-

He's so, so embarrassed to need the help.

Now that he's strong enough, she can let him do most of the work at least, and the only embarrassing, strangely charged part of the process is when she needs to help him wash his back. He can't really reach behind himself, yet, with how torn up his front is, with one of his wrists broken, so she has to scoot behind him and scrub down his gently gleaming scales.

He really doesn't seem to have many scars, beneath his newer injuries. She wonders about that, but she knows better than to ask. She just does her job, doing her best not to flinch when he does.

~

Rilla tries not to revive the argument about magic if she can avoid it. She's definitely interested in it, she wants to know what he'll say, really, but- it agitates him to a degree that she figures is probably not great for his current state. His throat is nearly recovered (his voice is still rough and fascinating, but there's a sort of murmuring musicality to it, too, now that he's had enough time to recover from the near-drowning part of his injuries), so she would really rather avoid making the monster shout. She'll pin that one for later.

Not that they don't argue. He's remarkably opinionated, and he takes umbrage with a number of the books in her collection. He seems baffled by just the structure of most of her instructional and encyclopedic tomes. Anything that's arranged alphabetically infuriates him.

"It is entirely arbitrary, takatakataka. They may as well be in an order that is entirely random."

"In what way would that be helpful?"

"There is a list at the beginning, and it tells you exactly where everything can be found!"

Rilla raises an eyebrow. "Uh… and?"

"Anyone may read this and find the information!"

Rilla blinks. "That's… kind of the point? To share the information?"

Arum pulls his head back, eying her in alarm. "That- I- but- if anyone can access it, how can it be useful to you? If anyone can do what you can do, how can you barter your skills?"

"Hm," Rilla frowns, just slightly. "I mean, just looking at my own profession- just because someone reads a book of remedies, doesn't mean they'll have the skills to implement them. It's less than half of it, even. You need training, too, an apprenticeship, and then personal experience. Practice. The books are important to the learning process, and no one can be expected to hold all that information in their head at the same time, but it's not the whole of it."

He tilts his head, considering that. "I suppose."

"Besides," she says, "I'm sure there are books with secrets, books that aren't meant to be shared, but those are probably kept somewhere hidden."

"Interesting," he hisses.

"Okay, so- if monster books aren't meant to give information to others, what's the point of them?"

"To save information for yourself. My predecessors-" he pauses.

She knows that look, by now. He thinks he's said too much. She rolls her eyes, sighs, and changes the subject.

~

Rilla isn't sleeping well.

Her sleep is strange apparently by nature; she sleeps deeply but in short bursts, and she has a habit of rising in the middle of the night for some water or to relieve herself only to be distracted by a book or an idea or an experiment clear until morning. Hell, she'll sleep whenever, for an hour or so at a time. It amuses Damien, but his own sleep habits are so firmly regimented by his work (when he isn't being plagued to sleeplessness by his mind) that he rarely wakes when she slips from the bed at night.

Currently, though, she's having a little bit of a hard time falling asleep at all.

Damien knows how to take care of himself. She knows that. She's not entirely sure he's capable of losing a fight. He might get hurt, that's happened entirely too often, but- he wins. He always wins, eventually, even if he has to put himself through hell, first-

She turns over again, presses her face into the pillow, sighs into the dark.

They have an argument to finish, she thinks. Damien would never leave a narrative arc like that unsatisfied.

She gets to sleep eventually. It's enough.

~

Arum isn't in his cot when Rilla comes in with dinner the third day after Damien leaves, and that's-

That's so entirely surprising that Rilla just kind of- stops, staring at the empty cot with the blankets kicked down for an extended moment, her brow furrowed in confusion, and she's almost relieved when she hears the distinct click of claws on hardwood behind her before she has a moment of wait that's probably not good-

The scaled arm wraps around her midsection from behind, and Rilla jolts, automatically pulling forward and away. He holds tight, though. Shockingly tight, actually, and then there is cool metal by her neck and Rilla knows her own damn scalpel easily and she goes still, because Rilla may be stubborn but she's not stupid.

"Arum," she says, and he growls behind her. She's not- scared, really. The scalpel almost makes it ridiculous, considering the claws. "Arum what the hell are you-"

"I'm leaving, you foolish little primate," he hisses.

"You aren't well enough-"

"I don't care what you think."

"Well you should, Arum, because you can hardly stand and if you think you're going to make it ten steps-"

"I appear to be standing perfectly well just at the moment, little doctor."

She twists just slightly, glancing back towards him as best she can, and she sees that he's stolen one of her crutches. It's not big enough for him, he's remarkably tall when he's not tucked into her cot, and it doesn't look at all comfortable tucked under his lower arm like that, but it's working enough that he's upright, at least. He adjusts his arm around her slightly, growling low.

"Arum," Rilla breathes, and she knows the exact pressure the scalpel in Arum's hands will require to break the skin. He is nowhere near that pressure, but she's very aware of it as an abstract concept, regardless. "Arum this is stupid and you know it."

"Can't even treat me with some respect when I could slit your little throat," he snarls, and she can hear how labored his breathing is. He really shouldn't be standing like this, stolen crutch or no. "Not an ounce of self-preservation in your absurd, fragile body."

"I could say the same damn thing about you, you ridiculous-" she cuts off as Arum shifts his grip on her, not because she's afraid of what he'll do, but because the hiss he gives as he moves sounds more like he's in pain than trying to threaten. "You're gonna get yourself killed because you're too stubborn to just wait until you're actually well enough to-"

"You don't have the first clue what you're talking about. I do not have time to convalesce. I have one purpose, I have one duty, and every moment I lie in that absurd little bed I am failing it. I cannot think, I cannot- I need to return home. I do not care if you understand why, Amaryllis."

"Arum-"

"I thank you for services rendered, such as they were, little doctor. My death would have been assured without you, that is undeniable. And for that, I will not harm you, so long as you do not force my hand," he hisses close by her ear, and then he lifts the last of his hands, and he is holding one of Rilla's syringes with it.

"Arum," Rilla breathes, "what-"

"This is the injection you gave to me before you plucked the basilisk's claw from my ribs. It kept consciousness from me rather effectively for a number of hours. So, little doctor, I must now trust to your expertise."

He adjusts his grip again, meeting her eye over her shoulder and pulling the scalpel further away from her skin.

"Have I gotten the dosage correct, Amaryllis?" he asks, quite seriously, his tone quiet and measured though she can feel him trembling very slightly against her.

She pulls her eyes away from his with some effort and looks at the syringe in question, and then she bites her lip. "It- I mean, good job because you matched exactly the dosage I gave to you, but the thing is-"

"I'm leaving, little human, and nothing you say is going to stop-"

"If you inject me with that I'll go into a coma, and there's a distinct chance I could die." She inhales shakily as Arum blinks at her, then narrows his eyes suspiciously. "You're a monster, Arum, and your metabolism and internal structure are much different from mine. What was perfectly fine and low-risk for you could absolutely kill me."

He stares hard at her for a long moment, frowning hard and trembling lightly, and then he apparently decides she must be telling the truth because he exhales deeply and moves the syringe much further away from her. She tries not to sag in relief, but the tension in her muscles eases enough that she's positive that he must feel it.

"Thank you," she says. "Now just- put down the-"

"I am certain you must have some form of binding in this little hut of yours," he interrupts in a growl, and Rilla blinks, not quite understanding him for a long moment. "Ropes, or scarves or some such. Bandages, those will suffice."

"Arum you can't leave," she tries again, but he's ignoring her now, edging the both of them across the floor towards the cabinets where he's definitely seen her store her bandages. "You won't make it four steps, you'll just get killed and after you've made so much progress-"

"You can stop acting at your leisure, Amaryllis. I am perfectly aware that you do not have the first clue what will happen when you are unable to keep me beneath your thumb any longer. I am simply skipping the intermediary steps. I will not wait for either your pet knight to return with his bow again, or for you to attempt to make me into another pet for yourself. I am leaving, I am going home, and you will not stop me."

When they're close enough to the cabinets, Arum sets the syringe down, then knocks it further along the countertop, out of Rilla's reach. He pulls out a roll of bandages, then glares down at her as she scowls back up at him.

"This is a completely stupid plan," she reiterates, but Arum only frowns more deeply and pushes her to sit on the stool.

"Possibly," he growls, and she rolls her eyes as he pulls her wrists behind her back with surprising gentleness, binding them together at the wrists. "But at least it is a plan, instead of this nonsense inaction."

Rilla tries to pull away, tries to make things difficult for him, but only for a moment. He does still have that scalpel- but really, honestly, she's been working so hard to treat him, to make him well again, and the idea of jerking away too fast or elbowing him to get him away, of twisting his broken wrist (the one wrapped around her, least needed for dexterity, not a bad maneuver), the idea of doing something that might reopen his wounds or hurt him worse- it makes her feel a little sick, actually. She's terrified of what's going to happen to Arum if he tries to walk out her front door on his own with no weapons and a flimsy crutch that can barely support his weight, he's going to get himself hurt, get himself killed-

He's going to hurt himself, but Rilla can't make herself hurt him, to try to get him to stop. She just can't.

"Please," she tries, and his violet eyes flick up to her from where he's knelt to bind her ankles to the legs of the stool. "Arum. Don't do this."

He stands slowly, and she really hasn't gotten the chance to see him at his proper height, yet. He does look a little more dangerous, when he can glare down at her like that with his frill half-flared (he just won't stop pushing himself, the giant ass).

"And what, precisely, do you propose, then? You and your knight had a rather unproductive argument the other day, I must say, though it did rather effectively clarify a number of points for me. The first being, my land is in danger, without me. The second, that your Damien can only be collared for so long before he decides to put an end to this. The third, that you, little doctor, do not have a strategy for how your treatment of the monster will end. You don't have the first clue what you will do with me, when I am too strong again to push and prod and poke-"

"If you die-"

"Then I certainly will not be your problem anymore, little doctor," he hisses, and then he turns to limp his way towards the door.

"All of this is for nothing if you just- Arum, please, I know I've been- stuck in the moment, I know I haven't been thinking about what comes next, and yeah, a lot of that was because I don't know, and I'm scared because I hate not knowing, but- but you don't have to do this. We can figure it out together, please Arum-"

He pauses at the door, leaning heavily against the frame, and then he looks over his shoulder, vivid purple fixing on her one more time.

"Farewell, Amaryllis," he says, his voice almost gentle, "and… thank you."

He closes the door behind him, ignoring the way that Rilla shouts after him, the way she keeps calling his name until she hears the front door open into the night. After a long moment, charged and quiet even of Rilla's voice, that door closes as well.

~

Somewhere distant, on a gently lapping shore, Sir Damien digs a grave.

His stomach turns, and turns, and his palms hurt against the wood of his shovel. His companion has sweat on her brow, but that is the only indication of any strain. Her expression remains stern and immobile, and Damien cannot possibly say whether she feels as he does, just now. In truth, he does not know if Sir Caroline ever feels… conflicted.

Dirt scatters as it falls. Sir Damien digs to lapping-wave rhythm and intermittent pigeon-coo, with his heart pounding as if it wishes to escape.

He wonders, in a continual refrain, if this was truly the right choice, if there was no other way. If this man could not have been saved .

Monsters, witches, and mercy.

Sir Damien knows good from evil. He knows monsters from man. He knows dark magic from miracle. He knows what is right, and he knows what is wrong.

(The shore laps soft as breath, the lake stands mirror-still, and he has not heard Saint Damien, has not so much as felt a hint of him since-)

Sir Damien wonders if he knows anything at all.

~

When Rilla finally, finally hears the bandage start to tear, she could just about shout with triumph. Instead, she grits her teeth, grins hard, and pulls harder. It rips more, pulling against her wrists, and then her arms are free so quickly that she almost smacks her hands into the bedside table in their wide swinging arc. She pulls her hands in front of herself first, rubbing at her wrists and assessing the damage (bruised, a little raw, very minor friction burns, nothing a little aloe and time won't fix), and then she reaches for a drawer. Arum may have been paying a little too much attention to where her medical supplies are housed, but Rilla has more than one damned scalpel, and she has it in her hands and slicing through the bandages tied around her legs in no time flat. She hasn't been pulling on those, so no damage to inventory there, at least.

She stands and stumbles just a bit, her muscles rubbery from sitting in that position for- for however long she had been, but she doesn't have time to do some stretches because Arum may be slowed down by his injuries and she knows what direction he'll go, but he still has a hell of a head start on her, and she can't afford-

Rilla nearly trips over her own feet when she bolts into the front room, and this time it isn't because of sore muscles.

It's because Arum is still here.

He's curled up on the floor, his back against her front door, his arms wrapped loosely around his knees. He flicks his eyes up towards her for less time than it would take to blink, and then he looks away, his eyes vaguely on the floor.

"Arum. Oh, thank the Saints you didn't-"

"Apparently even my stupidity has limits, yes."

"Arum," she repeats, uncertain and honestly a little scared that he's managed to hurt himself between his room and the door, somehow.

"You did not inform me precisely how close we are to your Citadel," he mutters into a palm, and she holds her own hand over her heart as it tries, valiantly, to slow its racing. "Within sight, even in the dark of night."

"You- Arum-"

"Congratulations," he growls dully, still not looking at her. "You were correct. I did not take a single step outside your little abode. Foolishness, all of it. Without my- without- even at my best it would take a week and a half at the least to reach my home from here unaided. Hobbling in unfamiliar terrain with this-" he pauses to kick the crutch beside him, sending it spinning across the floor, "thing, in this condition, it would be impossible. Pointless. And I-" he pauses, his lip curling down miserably, "I want to return home alive, in spite of it all."

She steps a bit closer, and he turns his face away so that he is no longer looking at the floor by her feet. "I… Arum, I'm sorry. I know this must be… I know you're probably homesick-" he chokes out a bitter, unpleasant laugh, "and- and I know how hard it is, to be pulled away from your home. From- from your family," she suggests, and he flinches, curling his arms more tightly around his knees, pulling himself into a ball in front of her door and scowling. "I should have tried to talk to you about it sooner. Look, I- I'd be lying if I said I know exactly how I'm going to make it happen, but- but I'm not helping you so that you can run off and get killed by knights or whatever trying to get home. I'm not putting in all this hard work just for you to die," she says dryly, and she's gratified when he gives a smaller, less choking sort of laugh at that.

She takes another step, and when she's almost beside him he still won't look up, so-

She turns, leans her back against the wall, and slides down to sit beside him, sighing. He finally glances her way, then, if only to give her a look of distinct alarm.

"I want you well again, Arum. I want you healed, and I want you safe."

"Why? " he hisses low, his voice shaking.

"It's my responsibility to look out for my patients. In your case," she smiles, very slightly, "I think that means I'm gonna have to get you home. I don't know how, but- but we'll figure it out."

He blinks at her, then ducks his head. "We will figure it out," he repeats, skeptically.

"Yeah," she says. "We."

Slowly, she turns her hand, not exactly reaching for him but just- opening her palm towards him, spreading her fingers in gentle invitation.

He stares at her hand for a long moment, his eyes darting to the reddening mark on her wrist, his tongue flicking nervously in the air, and then he looks away.

She tries not to feel too disappointed-

A scaled palm settles uncertainly over hers, clawed fingers loosely curling around her own. He won't look at her, he's frowning and his damned frill is flared again, but-

"We," he murmurs, and Rilla smiles.

[->]

[thesoftwarereview]

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[shadowofthelamp]

Fandom Trades: Tips and Tricks

I’ve been running a secret santa for five years now, and a few people expressed interest in a sort of ‘guide’. It does take some elbow grease to get things up and running, but it’s very rewarding and gets easier as you go. Click the ‘read more’ for some stuff I’ve picked up over the years! It’s a bit general to try and cover anything, but if you have any questions, you can ask! (And if you’ve run one yourself, feel free to add on!)

FAQ: Something that’s a really good idea to have. Here’s the most important stuff on it that would probably be applicable to most trades:

-Basic summary of what the trade will be- some could be fic-only or art-only, or even specific-ship-only. Mine’s general to ‘all sonic sfw content’, but setting guidelines so people know what they’re getting into is a good idea so you won’t have to answer the same question over and over.

-Deadlines. Make them clear. Mine’s easy (Christmas Eve) but depending on what size the gift is expected to be, the time frame can be adjusted. 

-Related, set up rules for if people need to drop out. It happens, so be prepared. (This is why I ask now if people are alright giving a second gift.)

-Any particular rules for your trade- is it sfw or is nsfw acceptable? (In that case, set age limits.) Are there ships that will or won’t be allowed? Is there a punishment for violating the rules or turning things in late, like not being allowed to participate in the trade again?

PROMOTION:

A promo image is a good idea! I’ve been using the same one for a few years that was put together by a friend no longer on tumblr, but images catch people’s eyes faster than a text dump. Make something that’s easy to understand but gets the point across, and the text below should have enough information without overwhelming the casual scroller. 

Space paragraphs often to make it less intimidating. Include links to the FAQ, the sample entry, and the submit box right in the post, as well as a way to contact you- you want things to be as easy as possible for anyone interested. Here’s my promo post.

You also want to start promotion early- I start posting and reblogging my promo a full month before the entry deadline, to give as many people the chance to see it as possible. Any earlier, and they might not care- (who wants to see a Christmas trade post in October when you’re hyped for Halloween?) and any later and you might not get as many participants as you could have. A month-ish is a good time frame. (I also have a tag for the promo post, so people can blacklist it if they aren’t interested and don’t want to see it 15 times.)

SAMPLE ENTRIES:

Also something that’s good to have. Having a template for what you want entries to look like will make sorting easier for you. Here’s mine. It’s a good idea to scout around for other trades to find out what would work for you.

MAKING ASSIGNMENTS:

Next, setting up how to arrange who gets assigned to who. I personally use google spreadsheets. These are the categories I use, feel free to steal them: Username, medium (art, writing, amvs, ect), whether they’ll work with fan characters, what they’d like to receive, what they won’t do (one year I even added ‘if there’s anyone you won’t work with’ so if it’s a fandom with drama, that one might be good), who they’re gifting to, who they’re receiving from, if they’ve submitted their piece yet, if their piece is in the queue, and if they’re alright with doing backup.

I also had a category for if they’ve confirmed they’re still in once assignments were sent out. (Boy, was that one nerve-wracking during the whole tumblr purge debacle of last year- I didn’t know if anybody had just quit tumblr mid-month.)

You will run into people who only want two or three things nobody else wrote on their sheet. If you can’t find even one match, then just put them with someone who had a wide variety on theirs, or who doesn’t have anything on their ‘won’t do’ list. Trying to match with multiple likes is a better bet, though, so encouraging longer lists of what people want makes things easier for you in the long run!

I personally just went in a line- I picked one person, found who they would give a gift to, and then found who THAT person would give a gift to. Rinse and repeat down the list, and it’ll end with everyone paired. I ended up making a closed loop and then sorting the last 8 or so, which was fine. An easy way to check that you didn’t double-classify anyone is control-f and searching names. If their name pops up 3 times, you did it right.

SENDING OUT ASSIGNMENTS:

Just copy-pasting the part of the entry that includes the person’s name and their likes makes this way easier for you over trying to type them out individually. Ask for confirmation that people got their assignments so you don’t have to worry if they missed it.

HOW TO KEEP THINGS ORGANIZED:

My system is this: I’ve mentioned it before, but I utilize a combination of my spreadsheet and the queue function. Let’s say Sally’s making a gift for Jake, Jake’s making a gift for Taylor, and Taylor’s making a gift for Sally. Sally submits her piece of art for Jake. I mark that off on the sheet, so when Taylor submits the gift for Sally, that gift will go in the queue to be posted whenever the deadline is up because she turned hers in already.

This keeps people motivated to complete their parts of the trade, since they won’t get their gifts until they do. If someone drops out, tell the person making the gift for them- if you’re lucky, they can rework what they have for the person that the drop-out was supposed to make something for, but if not, bring in someone who didn’t mind making a second gift. Person making the gift for the dropout can choose if they want to continue making it or not- if it’s mostly done and not a fan-character, they can just post it on their own blog unrelated to the trade. 

It’s also a good idea to have a ‘hub’ where things are posted. If it’s a fic trade, ao3 has a function specifically for this, but I’ve found having things submitted directly to you makes it a million times easier to keep track of who’s finished their pieces, as well as keeping things ‘secret’ until the big day. (People have gotten confused or excited and posted early before.)

If people want to post elsewhere after it’s posted on the main hub, set your own rules- I say it’s fine as long as it links back to the blog and links the giftee, particularly if it involves fancharacters. You make your own judgement.  

BE PATIENT:

This is one that’s very important. Some people don’t check the FAQ, and some people are going to be new, asking questions that you swear you’ve answered before or thought would be obvious. They generally just want to know, so take a deep breath. They don’t know they’re the fifth person to ask that question. Answer politely, or steer them towards the FAQ. (Running the same event year after year, you run into this a lot- they’re just new, be nice!)

Don’t start an event that you expect to have plenty of people participating if you aren’t prepared to hear the same questions a couple of times. Things might get a little annoying- take a step back for a few minutes, cool off, but try to remain professional. You signed up for this. For me, it’s always worth it to see how happy people are about their gifts, but know yourself and your limits- running a themed week where people post art at their own pace is less hassle, so you could try that if you don’t feel up to organizing a full trade! 

If you can have a friend to bounce things off of, that can help too, but don’t use them as just a dumping ground. Tumblr allows multiple ‘mods’ on a blogs, so splitting work can make things easier, particularly if it’s your first run doing something like this. I had a friend who helped me the first few years before leaving tumblr. Be sure you trust the person, though! They’ll be able to edit posts and delete submissions, so if any drama happens, beware. (This never happened to me, but it doesn’t hurt to be careful.)

TAGGING:

Add tags to the submission box. I don’t know why this took me four years to think of, but it saved me a lot of time last year. If it’s a trade that covers an entire fandom and dozens of ships, you can add the shipping tags as they come in, but adding the ten or so most popular character tags helps a lot. If it’s going to involve potentially triggering content, common trigger tags are a good idea too. (A Halloween trade might need this, for example, or one that involves nsfw content.)

PEOPLE TURNING THINGS IN LAST MINUTE:

It’s going to happen. I think one year I was panicking on the 23rd because I only had half the gifts, and all but one had been turned in by the time I went to bed on the 24th. People procrastinate- if you get in most of the gifts ahead of time, you can thank your lucky stars. Try not to stress over it, but feel free to post reminders in the week before/days leading up to the deadline. My family travels around the holidays a lot, and I managed to get everything queued up properly through airport and hotel wifi more than one year, so you’ll be just fine if you try and stay calm.

OTHER/GENERAL:

It’s absolutely worth it, in my opinion- I’ve been doing this for years for a reason. My favorite thing is knowing I’ve done something that made others happy. Going through all the excited responses Christmas morning is equal or above getting presents from my family, because I know it’s on some level because of me facilitating the trade in the first place. I hear over and over this is something people look forward to, and it genuinely warms my heart. 

It might take a few years to get established, but if you find a niche (there was a blog called sonic secret santa, but it hadn’t been updated in years) you might be surprised how fast you can gather people! I like seeing people show up year after year, it’s how I know I’m doing something right.

It is definitely work, and there is stress involved, (especially if people drop out or don’t send in their gifts on time) but the benefits outweigh the negatives, I say. People are generally understanding if there’s a problem, as long as you make it known you’re working on it.

You have to commit to the responsibility if you do this- people who are making gifts are putting their trust in you that you’ll keep things organized and they’ll get something for the gift they’re giving. You can’t guarantee everything will run exactly as planned, but you can be as transparent as possible when you hit a bump- ‘I’m sorry, but your person said they’ll be late because they were having internet problems/personal life issues and is doing their best’ is going to get a lot better of a response than radio silence. Be sympathetic, but be firm on the rules if need be.

I hope this helped a bit, and thanks for reading!