#it takes a long time to review all this audio lol

[re-dracula]

Personal beef with the commenter who said a gunshot warning was unnecessary as I listen to the audiobook and am startled A THIRD TIME by the sound

[diabolikpersonals]

I would like to hear your thoughts on the DF diaboys routes you have played at this point.

yessir!! under the cut:

Shu: Shu's DF route is an exercise in meeting him where he is. We know Shu loves his family, but we have to understand it isn't easy for him to show it. We're right at the precipice of a big change in Shu and Reiji's relationship, but we have to accept that acting the way Reiji wants him to just isn't what's best for Shu. Yui wants confirmation of Shu's affection for her, but she has to learn that he shows his affection in other ways. It's kind of like this route is showcasing Shu's flaws and you're going, "That's okay! I like Shu because he's Shu!" so I think it's sweet. Take your time, Shu! ...If I had to complain about this route, I'd say that we spend so long away from the other characters that it gets lonely. I guess that's the point, though...I just don't really find all the "hiding from everyone else" scenes very exciting after a while. We could've spoken to Reiji more, and I honestly feel like Shu and Reiji have bigger breakthroughs in other routes, so this one feels like it's missing a big scene with the Beatrix bros.

Ayato: If you had asked me when I had just played HDB and MB, I would have told you, "Never in a MILLION YEARS will I feel anything other than hatred for Cordelia," but well!!! Surprise!!! This one will make you feel things other than hatred for Cordelia, whether you like it or not. I truly understand how the triplets felt when they said they loved and hated her. The situation is too complicated for me to get into it very much here, but in short I'll say that I really liked the direction they took with the plot of this route, and I came out of it feeling like Ayato and Yui took a well-earned step forward. Absolutely loved this one. So proud of both of them. Whenever I play through the DF Sakamaki prologue, it makes me feel cruel if I don't pick Ayato's route lmao

Laito: If you are an angst lover like me then you will eat this shit up. It's an extremely bad time for every character involved. It hurt so good. I had to spend 70% of this route convincing Laito not to kill himself. In this route, Laito discovers a fact about his father that changes his outlook on his entire life, like every single thing about his life, and the performance that Daisuke Hirakawa gives is like.. It's pure art idk what to tell you. Reading this route is not good enough, you need the audio. I was scared, I wanted to cry, and as a triplet lover there were high points too, but my heart ached for the entire route, even through the good ending! I like that even the obligatory fanservice scenes don't let you forget how terrible the situation is! Strongly strongly strongly recommend

Yuma: Alas, I can only give you a super biased review of this one. It's my favorite route because it has so many good Shu/Yuma scenes. This route is our last bit of "Shu avoids Yuma and keeps secrets from him for his own good!" drama before Yuma finally gets the whole truth about his childhood. We get the cute flashback scenes, Yuma gets some awful nightmares and has some panic attacks, there's a little of everything! :D Even Zweig is there and he and Yuma are super cool, and if you know anything about Lost Eden then you know how hilarious that is. Anyway, this all culminates in THE YUMA BEST FRIEND MONOLOGUE which is one of my favorite dialovers scenes, period, because it makes me so happy. It feels soooo good to watch the arson recovery trio...recover from the arson. 10/10. Shuuma shippers, this one is required reading.

Carla: I'm definitely not shaming you if this route is to your taste, but it certainly wasn't to mine :') Most diaboys talk down to you, but Carla talks down to you to such a degree that I started getting offended over stuff I've never been offended about before. Like, "What do you mean you don't like the taste of my blood?! My blood is fucking delicious!" lol. I am not into all the forced pregnancy stuff, I am not into the demon racism stuff, I am not into how often Yui is reminded that she has no family and no one will come save her. I personally found Carla to be unbearable until he collapsed and started the process of dying. Then he got all sensitive and lonely and I was like "ok I can deal with him now." The ending isn't very satisfying either (What do you mean sucking Yui's blood will stop him from dying for now? He's been sucking her blood this whole time and his symptoms got way worse.) and Carla's blood sucking noises made me want to take my headphones off and throw them away (sorry toshiyuki morikawa I respect you so much toshiyuki morikawa) soooooooooo.........I didn't like it. I grew to like Carla around CL so don't be sad if you like him, ok? He's my friend now, but this route is still just unpleasant to me hgfghsdf

Shin: I know I said I hated the forced pregnancy talk and the demon racism plans and I did hate them, believe me, but Shin's route was successful in getting me to like him. I love that they put him in jail and beat the shit out of him, that was such a good scene and I really feel like my tastes are finally being represented lmao. Because it's his introductory route, he's pretty rough around the edges (true for every diaboy—everyone is a huge jerk in their introductory route) but there was still a lot to enjoy! The flashback scenes were fun (dare I say...he was...cute?!) and when put together with Carla's, the Tsukinamis have a super interesting story & dynamic together, and it fits the themes of dialovers really well. The differences with Carla's route, to me at least, are that Shin's scenes feel more like "playing with a diaboy" even when he gets mean, Shin has the added appeal of being teasable and of being a BIG FLUFFY DOG, and of course, Shin's blood sucking scenes didn't make me want to die. I'm clearly in the minority here, though, because Shin is at the bottom of every popularity poll I see lol...Anyway, it didn't make me LOSE MY SHIT like some other routes did, but I had fun playing this one!!

[pianistbynight]

waning summer days

i cheated and recorded in sections, then spliced them together because i can't get a single clean take. if it's not me making a mistake, it's noise surrounding me. this way, the pressure was lessened and i think i did better (far from "perfect" tho) and it was less frustrating.

thursday | 08/15/24

no piano today. i'm tired. but i did read more of sweet bean paste and continued to work on the databases course. today was a bit chaotic, so i couldn't get 2h of studying in, but if i sleep early, i can maybe hopefully wake up earlier to work on it.

friday | 08/16/24

tried to play piano but then stopped because i got tired sooner than i expected. (also tried out a voice recorder app to record the piano audio instead of my phone camera but didn't like it...too much treble.) i finished 1 subsection of the databases course. caught up with @zzzzzestforlife. listened to some lofi and watched some youtube.

i'm trying to get myself in the mood to prep for the upcoming school year 😮‍💨 i...find myself dreading more and more each coming school year for some reason. ... it's not the work i fear. i know i can do it well but it takes so much of me. and i wonder what i'm doing this for. because i don't have all the stepping stones laid out yet. 😮‍💨 i need to work on that, so i'm going to sleep now so i can have more energy to continue doing this tomorrow. good night.

saturday | 08/17/24

i had a much more ambitious plan originally, but the only solo activity i actually had time and energy for was journaling because coming back to my hometown reminded me of and clarified some memories and opinions i had formed long ago, how they've shaped who i am now... the rest of the time i spent with family with real conversation for the first time in a while, so that was nice.

sunday | 08/18/24

sigh. i have never felt like i belonged in my former hometown and the loneliness is striking much stronger now. i was so tired i couldn't do much today except start filling in the YearCompass because who said the new year had to begin in january lol. i'm glad today was a chill day spent at my temporary home.

i will try to sleep early tonight. hopefully i won't wake up in between and be unable to fall back asleep again.

monday | 08/19/24

today was my first day of passable sleep quality in the last couple days. i woke up later than i expected. yet i still didn't feel like doing anything. i forced myself to do some duolingo for cheap dopamine, and later in the afternoon, i attempted to get through 1 more subsection of the databases course but couldn't focus. instead, i researched how to apply to take courses at another university in my area since there are some interesting courses there that aren't available at the one i attend. at night, i practiced the last bit of the clementi sonata and tried to record the whole thing but couldn't get a good one. i'm too tensed and distracted. i need to practice playing while relaxed, focusing only on what's relevant in the moment.

review U1 japanese, start hiragana practice ✅

work on databases course 🟨

practice piano ✅

tuesday | 08/20/24

fill in the YearCompass bc i'm too tired to journal unprompted and i want to be filled with hope for this school year instead of constantly drained and increasingly discouraged, disappointed, and depressed (why do so many negative things start with "d"? even the saddest songs are in d minor...)

practice playing clementi sonata while relaxed throughout and focused only on what's currently relevant

DATABASES COURSEEE - finish 4/13 subsections ✅ (ended up finishing 2 and starting a 3rd...this is harder than i thought it'd be but it'll be good for me to keep going...)

wednesday | 08/21/24

i don't even remember what happened. probably because i wasn't very productive. i was unusually angry and moody. i tried to record a single clean take and kept failing. i merely inched forward in the databases course. it was a day full of frustrating but necessary interruptions. it was tiring. i can't wait to go home.

thursday | 08/22/24

recorded the clementi sonata in sections...with more time and energy, i probably could've done better. almost 50% through the databases course. feeling a little better today than yesterday but always easily tired. this might be my last summer-themed post for the year as i'm already in an "autumnal mood." 🍂😅 i'll see you later either here or on my sideblog @studentbyday 🙂

[swifty-fox]

After reading all the sexy clegan asks, I would pay some good money to watch their OF 😵‍💫. I feel like this is a more polite way of saying I want to be the fly on the while while gale gets twisted into a pretzal. Or while John gets bent over the dinner table. Swifty, my dude (slides a case full of money across a table), how do you feel about an AU where two beautiful entrepreneurs take agency of their body's and their sexualities and make some good, honest money... together 😉. (I feel like I'm turning into Barry in Saltburn. I would drink the bathwater. SEND HELP. I need psychiatric care now!)

John Gamer Girl Bathwater lmao.

but!! your mind anon lmao. I got to spend a fun night with a couple aussie SW's a few years ago after a cancelled festival (not in THAT way. had a mutual acquaintance and offered to hang out with them since we all suddenly had no plans) and It was fun picking their brains about their lives. They were both primarily dancers.

John starts an only fans after graduating college with a degree in sports management. It's not that he CAN'T get a job but he's suddenly like 'fuck just because i like sports do i really wanna make this my career???' kinda lounges around a bit until the bills poke him on the shoulder. He's like hmmmmm wow if i go into the service industry i'll kill someone. I'm hot I got abs and a mustache and I'm six three I can probably do this. Starts off with a lotta POV handjobs and general thirst traps. He doe's great, its John Egan so he's just got that natural charisma and his voice is deep and shoulders broad and he's real good at dirty talking so he does custom audios for a price. Gets into the collab world on twitter and kinda shoots up in fame real quick. More of a top, bi asf like all my au's so he's kinda going across the board. He's pretty open about what his job is and the people who have a problem with it he kindly tells to fuck off

Gale starts one to put himself through his masters degree then finds out it kinda just.... makes a lot more money with a much looser schedule LOL.

He takes a long while to get good at it. He's hot as hell and has all the creepy dom top accounts all over him but he's shy and takes him a long time to figure out how to sell his content properly. He can't quite get into the cock hungry bottom bitch slut role that people wanna shove him into and it hurts him a bit. But he does manage to get a decently sized following pretty quick. King of the moaning clips, great fuckin one-on-one vidoes of him riding a toy.

John stumbles across Gale as everyone does: scrolling the porn tag on twitter looking for a lil somethin somethin. Those pretty lips wet and flushed as if they've been thoroughly used and those soulful eyes looking up at the camera as Gale hangs his head off the edge of a bed ready to be a perfect sleeve for his dick.

He wrings one out real fuckin quick, drops him a follow and a DM in that order introducing himself and asking if he's ever done a collab.

of course Gale already follows John. He thinks he's handsome but hes got no interest mixing business and pleasure (lmao just wait pookie). He's also never done a collab, never fucked another person on camera. But. but.

John is handsome.

And he knows the guy is legit and safe, has seen him ALL OVER (certified bicycle John Egan always) and knows he's had good reviews.

Gale's had many DM's asking for collabs. This is the first he accepts.

How can he not when John is in there saying "Hey man great content. Would to love maybe have you fuck me" as casual as can be.

Gale's never thought to FUCK someone on camera. Sure he likes both but like I said people want a certain image from. So that in of itself is appealing.

He agrees wholeheartedly

He puts John on his knees on a mattress and pulls his hair until his eyes water, presses him down with a hand between his shoulderblades for that perfect fuckin arch and and spanks him until John is jumping away from even a brush of his hands and whimpering, camera angled to get the perfect shot of his tear stained cheeks.

"Come on darlin," gale croons in that drawl "The people wanna see you break for them, give it all to me."

He fucks John, ass still stinging so he flinches every time Gale bottoms out but damn does he love it and damn does it make for good content.

John comes out of that session already in love.

and of course collabs usually film a bunch of content. gotta capitalize.

So after some rest and recuperation John does exactly what he's fantasized about and lays Gale over the edge of his bed and fucks his throat. Loud and wet and noisy. Spit and pre-come and tears dripping down Gales face into his hair; onto the floor. John takes a little break to rub it all over his face and tell him he makes such a good pocket pussy. Gale's gunna come just from this if Johns not careful. He doesn't have to worry though because once John goes back down his throat he reaches over and gives Gale a nice handy.

Spins him around and fucks him while he's too sensitive and screaming, half cringing away from it but also grinding back because fuck is does John know how to fuck.

John gripping gales hips in his big hands and telling him "Now you're not running away from me yet sweetheart haven't rode you raw yet"

They fuck a lot more. a LOT more. For the content of course. And then theyre like hey maybe we should move in together as colleagues and friends. Except??? maybe?? they start fucking off camera. And maybe they cuddle on the couch. and hold hands. and kiss and go on dates. And maybe they get married?? As colleagues of course.....or not

[13thdoctorposts]

I just ordered all of Jodie's era on DVD (I'm a physical media lover) and can I say how wonderful and ironic it is to see the thousands of top star reviews for her merchandise and how stuff like certain figurines and her TARDIS figurine are either totally sold out or priced up hundreds of pounds when the haters say she's unpopular and doesn't sell. I mean she even has her officially licensed scarf and everything lol. People love her Doctor.

People seem to take the downward trend of spending during the pandemic as some sort of indictment that 13/Jodie doesn't sell, when in fact in 2018/9 there was a ton of merch that sold just like all Doctor Who merch does, we got the 10inch doll, a barbie, action figures, her sonic, her series 11 funko pop set, 3 novels with matching audio books, 5 YA/Kids books, Comics, games, eaglemoss figures... and thats just off the top of my head and doesn't even include all the generic DW merch... then 2020 came... 13 era merch seemed to vanish... gee I wonder what happened that year that heavily effected the economy, the workforce and businesses, not to mention peoples LIVES? People were losing their jobs, hoping not to get sick, dealing with having sick loved ones and trying to make sure they had enough toilet paper somehow I don't think any shows merch was top of peoples minds, and businesses that were essential to making merch were losing money, making it harder to make things!

I don't believe there has ever been a problem with 13/Jodie selling, unfortunately during her tenure one of the most disruptive events in our generation happened and merch wasn't a priority and even made for fans to buy during that time due to the conditions, restrictions, and economy to know if it wouldn't sell, so its a ridiculous argument.

But as you said theres also a number of items of her merch that are not only expensive if you want one now but you'll be lucky if they even come up for sale because clearly people want to keep them.

For example... 13 Build a Bear, 13 Blush bear from Children in Need, the 2018 SDCC 13 Pop, the 1/5 signature edition Big Chief Studios figure.

You want any of these not only will you have to wait who knows how long for one to come up to buy but expect to be paying a small fortune... However you want a 10th Doctor Build a Bear? They are on Ebay now, more pricey then buying originally from Build a Bear but no where near as much as a 13 Bear when it comes up I've seen 2 come up in 12 months. You want one of the other Doctor Chidlen in Need bears that were release? Yeah you can get them pretty regularly on Ebay too and a pretty good price, head over there now and you'll find them, never seen a 13 one for sale, Big Chief Studios figure? You can find most all the other Doctors, 13 I've seen it come up twice in the last 12 months on Ebay, and only 1 was in its original condition so good luck, and hopefully you have a weeks salary you don't need to buy it if you wanted it they are so expensive, you can still find listings for the 2018 SDCC 13 Pop but you got a spare 250+ pounds to pick it up? Haven't seen any other Doctor pops cost that much if you want to get one.

If Jodie was soooooo unpopular why is she one of the most expensive and elusive Doctors to be able to get merch for when she is technically the most recent Doctor with merch you should just be easily able to pick up.

Jodie also recently had prints of an image she painted sold for charity they were not cheap! There was only 50, they were gone in under 1 day.

Haters are just gonna make things up because the truth doesn't fit their narrative.

[vidreview]

some thoughts on Action Button Reviews

[originally posted december 22nd 2023]

ANONYMOUS ASK: Not a recommendation because I know you've already seen it, but I remember you (this being like a year ago) calling Tim Rogers' action button reviews boku no natsuyasami something along the lines of "a triumphant demonstration of what's possible in the video essay medium". I was wondering if you could elaborate, provided it hasn't been too long. I recognise I'm blasting you from the past here lol. It was one of the few hours-long video essays that I didn't mind sitting through, though I'm still not sure it quite justifies its length. Tim's delivery helps significantly there, in a way that reminds me of Caleb Gamman's casual/improvised-feeling but thoroughly scripted shtick.

oh i still think Tim Rogers is hands down the best in the biz. i've watched the Action Button reviews multiple times, i've got a davinci resolve project with all his videos in, studied them under a microscope and taken lots of notes. i think his work absolutely does justify the length, because rather than trying to say Everything There Is To Say about a game, he instead focuses on digging into the game's relationship with his own hyperspecific subjectivity. i don't know how else to describe the Action Button reviews except as literary media criticism, using incredibly in-depth analysis as a jumping off point for discussing how these games shape us and the culture, the role they occupy at various stages of our life, and how who we are at any given moment is just as important to our opinion of a game as the game itself. sooner or later i want to do a full-on VIDREV on his stuff, probably in video essay form, but consider this a first draft overview of why i find his work so special.

there's little things. despite the length of his videos, he never fails to get to The Point (his term for the thesis statement) within five minutes of starting the essay proper. he is a talented and quick-witted tour guide, funny and clever and philosophically ponderous all at once. his work is clearly designed to reward multiple viewings, yet never fails to feel complete on a first watch. he writes with a precision of language that'll knock your socks off if you let it, especially if you're willing to go with him on his seemingly non sequitur tangents. but it goes a lot deeper than that.

i just don't think anyone else is putting nearly as much time, effort, and thought into the moment to moment particulate matter of his video essays than Tim Rogers. there are a ton of little mistakes that quite a few essayists make as a result of only doing one or two complete editing passes, or otherwise not sitting down and watching their video start to finish at multiple points in post-production. things like bad audio mixing, cut-off breaths and sounds that ought to be removed, stray frames from footage creating accidental jump cuts, flubbed line deliveries, misaligned overlay elements, sloppy compositing, the list goes on. it's no great sin to make these mistakes, mind-- no one's being commissioned, most essayists aren't professional editors, there's no quality control or review board or institutional best practices. it's the difference between giving the kitchen a quick once over with a rag and getting on your hands and knees to scrub every stain with a toothbrush. most people don't have the time it takes to do the latter, aren't getting paid enough, and the returns on putting the effort in are impossible to measure and therefore, practically speaking, nonexistent.

but as someone who tries to put that kind of work in (not always successfully), i can always tell when another essayist has done the same. longform video essays in aggregate tend to be messy, under-structured, rambling; they often arise out of an essayist's desire to say everything they could possibly say on a subject. not only is this an impossible task, it makes for a pretty dull viewing experience to boot. what i find so impressive about Tim Rogers' work is that despite their length, his videos are relentlessly structured. the attention to fine details in the moment-to-moment edit across the whole runtime is astonishing; that the script itself is so internally integrated never fails to make me furious (with professional envy). he always has a lot to say, not all of which is strictly speaking essential to the analysis, but nothing ever feels so indulgent that it drags the rest of the essay down in my estimation. he often repeats information, but he does so very strategically and in a way that's meant to help the viewer follow a thread from start to finish. i also think his presentation style goes a long way towards hiding how much effort he puts in, how relentlessly curated these things actually are in spite of their length. he's talked extensively about how much he cuts from these videos (most prominently is story 5 from the Cyberpunk 2077 review, which went from over an hour in length at first draft to, eventually, just over a minute), how he watches them back over and over and constantly makes fine adjustments. that work won't be apparent to everyone watching, but it's exceedingly apparent to me.

and then there's the cherry on top of it all, which is the fact that the Action Button reviews are constructed as being part of "seasons" that have a planned thematic throughline. taken as a whole, season 1 is a completely unique work of literary metacritical nonfiction, a series of six reviews (Final Fantasy VII Remake -> The Last of Us -> DOOM -> Pac-Man -> Tokimeki Memorial -> Cyberpunk 2077) that use specific games to talk about trends in game design, trends in gamer culture, the history of games development, all through an astonishingly earnest and open autobiographical document of Tim Rogers' own professional and personal life, which is given particular weight by his astonishing capacity for near perfect recall from early childhood. they are the clear result of a life spent thinking about and writing about and talking about games in between all the rest of his life, neither of which was ever truly separate. i know i'm throwing around a lot of superlatives here, but i really do adore these essays. i think a lot of folks doing longform games reviews try to achieve a sort of technical objectivity, limiting the scope of their analysis to strictly what's in the game (and often only that which involves numbers, leaving any narrative or thematic components to a brief aside at the very end). the Action Button method should fall into that category, and yet Rogers himself uses its technical objectivity as an anchor around which flows an endless and unquantifiable ocean of subjectivity, where game mechanics and thematic elements mix forever. each subsequent review drops a new anchor, and thus begins to compose a map whose purpose is as much a matter of self-reflection as it is pure education or analysis.

but i really do think it's with the first (and so far only) episode of season 2, his review of Boku no Natsuyasumi, that you can really see the cunning of what he's been up to all along. i often find myself thinking about his reflections on returning to Kansas ("it took me back to a place i had never never been"), on why people rewatch movies and replay games ("our memory only records the cold parts"), on the futility of trying to recapture the past ("places don't remember us"), on the screaming terror of our own looming mortality ("meanwhile our shattering animals"). i just know those quotes off the top of my head, man, that's how deep in it i am. the Boku no Natsuyasumi review is a masterpiece, and the ways it breaks from the style and approach of season 1's reviews only strengthens the choices he made in season 1, because suddenly we realize that they were choices. that's the artfulness of this series, in my opinion: it starts as, seemingly, a relatively bog-standard "i'm going to review some video games and make some jokes and tell some stories along the way" type joint, but slowly reveals to you essay by essay just how little of this project was automatic, unconsidered, arbitrary, and that its aims were never so miniscule as "tell you why a video game is good". there are themes running throughout the entire series, repeated phrases and ideas, theories of mind and play that build in the subtext, accruing like memories, subtly building mass until you look back and realize that what seemed like a random selection of topics was, in truth, premeditated with a conspiracist's attention to detail.

and yet despite all this high-minded gobbledygook, these videos are relentlessly watchable and entertaining. i don't always agree with his takes (i was particularly frustrated that his exploration of "every cyberpunk game" omitted the flood of relevant titles that came the indie sphere over the last decade, like Cloudpunk and Read Only Memories), but they're not the kinds of disagreements that would make me sour on his work overall, and anyway the experience is so much more valuable than something as rote and immaterial as an opinion. there's so much more i could say (and inevitably will say, someday), but there you go, that's a rough gloss on what i like about the Action Button reviews.

[pandasmagorica]

Third (?) Re-watch in progress - Bad Buddy - first 7 minutes

Okay, I'm torn between blogging this re-watch - and wanting to make sure I get this whole re-watch done before Bad Buddy disappears from YouTube. But these first 7 minutes before the opening credits are such genius that I have to blog something before settling in to watch two or three eps in a row this evening.

My review of Stay By My Side is going to have to wait a few days as well. While I enjoyed it, there is more going on in these 7 minutes than in that entire series. Okay, maybe an exaggeration. Okay, definitely an exaggeration. But that series didn't send me running directly to Tumblr's Create button and these first 7 minutes did.

All of this is from Episode 1 [1/4], before the credits:

1:09 Okay, I didn't know yet (on first watch) that this is one of the two mains (and that Wai isn't), but, damn, Pat (unnamed as yet, unless Korn said it in Thai and it got subbed as an English pronoun as often happens in Thai series) looks like a tough guy. We learn later about him having to sleep with his Nong Nao doll and otherwise being a softie, but he does have this tough side as well.

1:59-2:23 Love the audio in this series. Watch what they do with the sound: dramatic classical music as Pran opens and arranges his drawing kit, until his friend interrupts him and we get the sound of a phonograph arm scraping across vinyl then just the dialog. (Would the main audience for this series even know that sound I know all too well?)

2:33-2:42 But when Pran hears it's Wai in the fight, suddenly we hear a heavily distorted metal guitar riff which continues until Pran takes the first earbud out at which point it suddenly cuts off. Hmm, technically I'd consider that an edit error. I'd expect the volume to drop when he takes the first one out and cut off when he takes the other out. But that's a nitpick. Audio-wise, it's a great choice.

2:41-2:45 We actually saw a glimpse of Pran's OCD starting at 1:59 when he was neatly arranging his drawing kit, but now we really see it as, despite being under time pressure, he takes out his earbuds and carefully stows them. (Earbuds will play an important role in the first few episodes.)

2:50-3:57 This fight is so chaotic and disorganized. This is where my bestie decided she had no interest in this series, although I did eventually convince her to watch episode 5 [1/4], [2/4], and [4/4]. Also thinking about how I didn't know at first watch that Ohm is skilled in martial arts. Don't know about any of the other actors but hope they had a good fight coach to keep them safe.

3:24-3:29 Funny to think the actor playing Wai is a doctor in real life.

4:13-4:17 And suddenly everything comes to a stop when Pat and Pran see each other face to face.

4:18-5:54 For all the Tumblr discussion in which the first 4 episodes are seen as being primarily from Pran's point of view, then episode 5 being Pat's, it's an interesting choice to start their introduction as being the main characters with Pat's view of Pran. Interleaving the shots of their life now with shots of their life in grade school and high school establishes immediately that they have a long history, as well as their history of competition and their parents' clashes.

5:54 Bringing the focus back to the two of them as main characters.

5:55-7:00 And continuing the introduction.

6:11-6:14 Lol at the Buddhist monks eye-rolling at the mothers' competition.

7:00-7:11 And now the fight is Pat and Pran one-on-one. And we go to the opening credits.

Whew! Can I just say the editors are brilliant? Not one wasted second.

I don't get reaction videos and have no interest in watching them. But I guess there is something to be said about being able to share my reaction to each moment.

Okay, I'm going to have to lock my keyboard while I watch this. Going back to moment zero so I can watch this uninterrupted.

[middle-eastern-queen]

The Worst Of Evil Episode 1 notes

im watching this show and writing about it on my Patreon. Here is my notes for Episode 1:

-wooki walking in in all white like THE KING HE IS

- The gang leader is a…. Celebrity? WHAT?

- ah hes a dj

- ah that was before recruitment

- 1995

- gicheul is smart

- we''re watching his rise

- god i hate all these dumb macho shit

- taking over gangam with drugs lovely

- i need to see wookis face now im bored

- why do all the bad guys and gangs have bats and battons and freaking axes… but no guns? Its so lol

- like ok guns are illegal but smacking someone to death isnt? Lmaooo

- well that was a flop plan… 

- what happened to the fire alarm lmao

- theyre being thrown off a level and still alive… gotta love kdrama logic 

- not a single security in sight loooooooooooooooooooool

- you should have kept your promise booboo

- died with scissors… COME ONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

- the scissor dude is bleeding more than the people stabbed with knives and axes… gotta love kdrama dramatics

- and i guess he lost a friend and lost his soul…an evil was born muhahahahahah…

- a bit cliche but im here for wooki so lets get along

- the plot and dialogue is a bit dumb ngl but its a webdrama so i guess it is what it is

- the audio is pretty dramatic too theyre over doing it with the “stabbing” and “blood” sounds just cause they can now (webdrama freedoms) but its still a bit too much takes you out

- these random kdrama extra girls be truly idiots 

- the kdrama logic here is sending me

- so no one thought of stopping her? Lmaooooooooooooooooo

- i mean the dudes survived a level drop… why cant she lololo

- 34 minutes in and wooki has appeared for a total of 2 minutes in total 

- as per usual, the cops ar USELESS

-WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

- WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKI X2

- “You want me to a bad guy just to catch bad guys”... yall thats his license to kill lmaooo 

- he’ll do the absolute worst things but show a puppy face and we’ll all be like “Awwww my cutie patootie good guy”

- guilt tripping him… lovely

- “im not doing this”... cuts to him sitting in the office ready to accept lmao… in true wooki comedy fashion

- his dads a druggie so theyre judging him… ok i get it

- thats why theyre giving this to him

- why is he both adorable and hot af at the same time? Like genuinely… how does he do it?

- ugh this makes me want to go back and watch Healer and Suspicious Partner and the K2 again

- that was the most not so secret secret hideout that ive ever seen

- uh boo boo your dad being a druggie and you being a smoker… does not help your case lmaoooooo

-the machoness feels so forced help its lowkey funny

- lmao ofcourse japan is the bad guy in a kdrama

- hes smoking like a dog and put asthma as the sick leave reason helpppppppp

- how are they gonna convince him that wooki is a secret long lost cousin oh come onnn

- woooooooooooooooookiiii

- god i missed his badassssssssssssssssssssss-ness

- where did he get the watch

- just cause hes a cousin doesnt mean he should talk the same

- lmao kdrama logic is wild

- omg that last scene thoughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I will be posting an in depth episode 1-3 review on patreon later this week, so stay tuned. 

[jiminsass-istant]

Fri(end)s- observations and review

Acting-

As usual, Tae has done a great job at acting. But the actress's acting was just.. meh. Makes me really appreciate IU. And not just that, Tae's acting was fine but they literally had no chemistry. That happens when you don't take time to know your coworker. IU and Tae are great friends and great actors and hence their chemistry works so well. Tae is able to create chemistry with anyone as long as he knows them (as seen with bts members and in his acting works too), even when the other side isn't good at it. But this time, somehow zero chemistry.

Somebody pointed out that there was an 'intimacy director' at the MV set too. Seems like they directed intimacy for all couples except the main one.

Storyline-

From the teasers, I already knew the storyline was going to be fun and interesting. I think it's pretty obvious that the scenes and environment we witness throughout the MV was from Tae's POV.

At first, he perceived that everyone else was happy because they were in love and had partners. In his second life, he was in love (or so he thought) and somehow all his problems in life were non existent. And he stopped noticing other people. So this time we saw the actual state of people around him and no one was actually completely happy, because relationships take work and not all relationships are meant to be. But Tae doesn't know that yet, because he smiles smugly at the camera with the girl by his side.

(somebody teach this girl to act, i swear to god)

And then he dies for a second time, but this time, he is smiling. Because he has realised something finally.

In his 3rd life, he wakes up beside himself (selfcest lol). But basically it means self-love. The moral being that a relationship won't change your fate. And that people who depend on a relationship for all their happiness actually lack self-love.

This time he wakes up with a knowing smile. And you know what, he probably knows he won't die this time because he won't be distracted by any strong emotions of love or despair. He'll focus on himself and he'll notice the speeding car before crossing the road.

Audio-

Honestly, I expected that the song would be 100% english. We already know that Tae is heavily inspired by a lot of western artists and loves to sing in English. The song is good and has some new vocal flavours from him. And it does sound inspired from a couple of songs I've heard before. I can't remember which ones, but definitely inspired. I loved the outro and overall the song is pleasing to the ears.

Edit(+) I appreciate Tae for trying a new cadence and tempo. The words are fast paced in this song and for a non-English speaker, he did very well.

Lyrics-

He's not the writer. But he definitely knows what he's singing about. I'm seeing vminnies make endless connections and tbh, i like seeing theories lol. As a lore and as a story, it's interesting.

[skadream]

Rudy's Book Reviews: You Will Get Through This Night by Daniel Howell

yeah thats right im gonna be a phannie on main for a second. this is the start of my book review series which i hope to actually folow through with lol. this one ive been listening to as an audiobook but i do have the physical copy as well cuz im like that! next review will hopefully be gideon the ninth so tune in for that, but for now, read this review under the cut:

this book is a practical mental health guide, honestly a lot of it is stuff that you can learn in therapy so like if you have a therapist that you like then maybe its not worth it BUT theres like slim pickins for mental health books that arent just anecdotal evidence without actually talking about what people did to help them get better, just "yea i was sad but then i got therapy ✌️" or books that are so couched in psychiatric jargon its hard for a layperson to get into OR just vaguely inspiring bullshit.

its all written with the help of an actual licensed psychologist person, so no bullshit, no just do yoga and drink water shit (although obviously exercise and hydration and physical health are talked about) and yes he mentions medication and LICENSED therapy if those end up being necessary steps to take with your mental health!!! which again, in the world of self help type books, tends to be rare advice which is DEPRESSING IN A DIFFERENT WAY LMAO.

ofc it should go without saying that a book can never be a replacement for therapy but Considering How The World Is, this book is good for like maybe stepping into learning some coping skills as well as figuring out a plan before, during, and after crisis mode. i would say the tone is more serious than humorous but dan puts a lot of his own natural snarky sarcasm stink all over this book which obv that can be a taste thing if youre not into brit sarcasm mode but as a One Of Those i like it lol

in terms of Dan And Phil™️-isms, theres a sprinkling of cute winks and nods and inside jokes that people who drew sharpie cat whiskers on their faces as teens would understand but Normies will not find to be out of place or anything, there's also some storytimes of like his previous tours or living as a dropout youtuber being stress-inducing and things like that but not a ton which i kinda prefer cuz it makes it easier for me to recommend this book to people who dont give a shit about Phandom Memes

theres an introduction which is kind of a short summary of who dan is, basically just summarizing his youtube videos talking about depression and when he came out as queer and all that fun stuff, if youre a psycho hardcore fan person like me you might find it to be a long and unnecessary read, but if youre someone who didnt know about this guy and are curious as to why he would even write a book like this its a pretty good synopsis.

the american cover has dan's stupid face on it, and as someone who is a big fan of dan's stupid beautiful face, i wish we had the EU version with like tasteful yellow stripes on it bc it looks so nice, but i mean i just keep it on my bookshelf with the spine showing which is just a nice yellow spine with the title and looks unassuming so its not THAT big a deal lmaoo.

in terms of the audiobook, dan's voice is quite soothing and there's all these like audio cues and fitting music which i really like. the only downside is, for example, he reads out this timed breathing exercise that is meant to be like a five minute exercise, but it's not actually timed? so like i want to do the breathing exercises along with him reading it out but he reads it so fast its kinda like bro slow down you said breathe in for five seconds why you going ahead two seconds later homie. thats my only criticism i think obv if you are reading it and not listening you can just do the exercises by timing yourself lol.

ummmm idk if im gonna give a number at the end of these reviews!!! i give this book a big thumbs up!! 👍 woohoo yeah baby i am very proud of dan's current life journey thing that he's going on and i think this is a great book for people who need help which is everyone alive today right now :)

[demigodofhoolemere]

MAN The Anachronauts was a RIDE.

- Big Finish continues to peddle my Steven/Sara agenda for me: “We were fast becoming friends. We might almost have– But, there was never time.”

- The way they both talk about each other kills me: “I didn’t love him, not like that. We hardly even knew each other. A few days on the run, trailing after the Doctor. Yet he was more of a friend than anyone I’d known in the service. He knew what I was. What I’d done. That I’d shot my own brother. Everything I’d lived for had been exposed as a lie. We’d all been puppets of Mavic Chen, and Steven never judged me for it. He’d forgiven me. I needed that. I needed him. To convince me I wasn’t a monster. It was purely me being selfish, but I needed him to survive.”

- Cannot believe I actually listened to the Doctor shipping them and encouraging Sara to spend as much time as possible with Steven. I’m used to him shipping Ian and Barbara but apparently this extends beyond them as well. He always knows how his companions feel even when they don’t, lol.

- These two always crack me up:

Steven: “You saw what happened before — you shoot me, and I’ll just heal.” Doctor: “Uh, no, my boy, that isn’t true.” Steven, in a frustrated growling voice: “Doctor, they didn’t need to know that!”

- Ouch at Steven mentally reviewing the calming methods he’d used on Mechanus to cope with being locked up. I think this poor guy should never have to be locked up ever again. But I do love that Big Finish makes so much use of his painful past.

- This story is one long series of unfortunate events for Steven, which tracks. Lost count of how many times he got knocked out, shot at, or captured here.

- I was NOT expecting the plot twist that everything in the second half was in his head. I’d been enjoying all of the Steven and Sara content going on but that was fascinating. Disappointing that he didn’t do any of that with the real Sara but it’s still very juicy that his own mind conjured Sara as something he’d do anything to protect and in doing so keep himself trapped.

-  Moment of appreciation for Peter and Jean’s performances because they were outstanding, especially in the big reveal scene.

- I always love the attention to detail these audios have. They take so many tiny things from the televised serials into account and use them in great ways. Also love how they always nail the personalities. They feel so alive and tangible and show every character facet that I loved so much about them.

- OUCH at Sara’s dream being of Bret’s birthday surrounded by everyone she’s lost, and that she knew it wasn’t real but couldn’t resist. Owwww.

- I enjoy that the first and second parts of this story felt very different from each other. The whole thing was written incredibly cleverly.

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Sunday, October 2

Willow: Snyder must be in charge of the volunteer safety program for Halloween this year. Xander: Note his interesting take on the volunteer concept. Buffy: What's the deal? Xander: Oh, a bunch of little kids need people to take them trick-or- treating. Sign up and get your own pack of sugar-hyped little runts for the night. Buffy: Yikes. I'll stick to vampires.

~~Halloween~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

this hell is better with you (Buffy/Faith, G) by gallifreyanlostintheuniverse

Whumptober 2022 Prompt No. 2-Nowhere To Run (Crossver with Supernatural, NR) by stargazingspuffy

Equi Feri (Buffy/Giles, G) by RG1954

The Hoops of Flame (Spike/Angel, M) by Anonymous

Washer at the Ford (Angel/Cordelia, M) by Lostakasha

Into Every Stranger Generation (Crossover with Stranger Things, M) by eddiemunsons80sbaby

[Chaptered Fiction]

Where Will I Meet My Fate, Chapter 2 (Angel/Cordelia, T) by FanFreak611

The Gift of Baldur's Gate 2: The Search for Dawn, Chapter 1 (Crossover with Baldur's Gate/Dungeons and Dragons, T) by BrennaLynn

Batman: The Buffy Chronicles, Chapter 1 (Crossover with Batman, T) by BrennaLynn

The Real McCoy, Chapter 15 (Ensemble, T) by michael t

Buffy and the Lost City of the Dead, Chapter 8 (Buffy/Spike, R) by JaneRemmington

Vacation with a vampire, Chapter 5 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Coraline

i'm only man (with a candle to guide me), Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, R) by trevino

Daughter of Aurelius, Chapter 51 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Loup Noir

Off My Rocker, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike/Drusilla, R) by Desicat

Learning to Be Love's Bitch, Chapter 3 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Desicat

Adventures of a Super Family, Chapter 107 (Crossover with Supergirl, FR13) by Philister

It Devours, Chapter 1 (Crossover with Marvel, FR13) by Buffyworldbuilder

Echoes of Beljoxa, Chapter 1 (Spike/Buffy, 18+) by myrabeth

What Makes a Monster, Chapter 7 (Spike/Buffy, 18+) by SleepingTigress

Chapter (Spike/Buffy, ) by

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork: Spike/William the Bloody made in MS Paint by Key_Shallot_2415

Artwork: Sunnypops! by illustrated_mixtape

Meme: Mean Girls (Sunnydale Edition) by gimmesomespace

Manip: it's better than I ever knew (PG-13) by scratchmeout

Comic: D-straction Day: All Night Long Issue #2 (NSFW) by HappyWhenItRains

Artwork:BTVS “Every Outfit” “Goodbye Iowa” Xx by whatshisfaceblogs

Meme: BTVS romancebookmemes by authordeeplex

Gifset: ↬ 1.04: “teacher’s pet” by buffy-the-slay3r

Gifset:👻 HALLOWEEN 2022 👻 day two • buffy the vampire slayer by meliorn

Gifset: ↳ 4.01: “The Freshman” by mr-giles

Gifset:4.09 “Something Blue” | 7.13 “The Killer in Me” by spikedaily

Gifset:5.05 | “No Place Like Home” by schrutedwight

[Reviews & Recaps]

Boys ‘N’ Ghouls Film Review Podcast: Episode 244 – Buffy the Vampire Slayer TV Series by Black Cat Film Productions

Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Season Two, Episode Fourteen: Innocence by Slayed! The Buffyverse Revisited Podcast

Buffy 3x10 - Amends - REACTION! Oz... Come on man! by Big Time Knights

ONE FLEW OVER THE BUFFY'S NEST! Buffy, the Vampire Slayer 6x17 'Normal Again' Reaction! by Elie Moses

no. - Buffy the Vampire Slayer Reaction - 5x16 - The Body by TheLexiCrowd

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (Season 2) Episodes Ranked | THE CHERRY PICKER After Dark (PREVIEW) by The Cherry Picker

Introducing: "The Rewatcher: Buffy The Vampire Slayer" by Weird Darkness

[Fandom Discussions]

[none of the characters even understand souls] by deadwivesclub

Drusilla's name by nightshade and Octavia

Giles/Ripper or William/Spike by multiple authors

Too many deaths by multiple authors

Angel Season 5 Rewatch - #17 Underneath (SPOILERS) by Involvere and GoSpuffy

This is a shout out to the foley artists by skinky-dink

Wesley's expression in this pic would be my expression if I could ever see Faith in real life lol. I love the drama in Orpheus. What are everyone's opinions on the episode? by multiple authors

What was the best-acted scene in the series? by multiple authors

A moment to appreciate Fred and Spike's friendship by multiple authors

Poll: who did you prefer with giles? by multiple authors

Any characters you wish you saw have more one on one scenes or a centric episode on them by multiple authors

Poll: Saddest Buffy Summers quote? by multiple authors

Not sure if this is a theory or if it’s a super common view by multiple authors

Aresteia by Moon_Logic and multiple authors

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

INTERVIEW: David Boreanaz Talks Being Part of Potential 'Angel' Reunion via popculture.

PUBLICATION: Buffy the Vampire Slayer Is Setting the Stage for a Spike/Xander Romance via ScreenRant

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Join the editor team :)

[seaweedstarshine]

I just finished reading your meta on the NineRiver audios and honestly at first I was feeling a bit hesitant because of how I got exposed to the naysayers' takes first. But glad I finally felt brave enough to peek under the cut.

I love how you point out that the Doctor is always unsettled with the concept of having a wife in any regeneration because it's not that they hate River (which I've seen was the conclusion of some after listening to the audios 🫥), it's that they didn't think they'd ever be in a relationship, much more married of all things.

Also wanna ask if it's possible to have a clarification on the statement "River does not hide her infatuation". Unless it was used with a different meaning to what it usually has. Because by this point, she's past that infatuation stage? (Do we count Mels as the infatuation stage? I think early baby River could maybe count as infatuation stage too?)

Okay and the part where you point out that River barely notices the Doctor's new bodies is such a cool one because I JUST REALIZED IT. You know that thing where you ingest something but it takes you some time before said thing gets processed (usually by someone else pointing it out)? Yes, that's me.

Totally still laughing over Nine being "totally doing that kind of stuff with you, River, sans the guns" and around two regenerations later, he's totally doing that kind of stuff with River with the guns. He learned rather quickly that he has the tendency to give River what she wants lol (also headcanoning that Eleven had fashioned a hidden gun panel in the TARDIS console "just in case you need it River" but of course since we love angst he never was able to show it to her because she'd swanned off to the Library and he kept seeing her data ghost in the corner of his eye) (also could it be that the reason why Eleven is more "okay" sort of with her and her guns is because he understands her trauma and how having her gun around is sort of like her security blanket?)

Oh and Archipelago, my beloved. My heart hurt with Swipe Right, laughed a bit with Face of the Apocalypse, but damn, Archipelago. Damn. It made me bawl for a bit longer afterwards. I just love when Big Finish writers get DoctorRiver.

I'm gonna be dragging my heels a bit here though because although I originally went along with the QPR feels after my first listen (yes I listened to it again *⁠\⁠0⁠/⁠*), then a moot on Twitter pointed out that Nine and River had definitely fucked in the middle of the time storm. And I was like "WAIT WHAT WHEN WHERE" because how? I mean they were covered in corals by that time yeah? And moot said it happened near the end when they were acting "like a couple again" (must be after Nine read River's diary and got to know her, understand her). River described their time together while writing in her diary and mentioned "and then finally we lay together again". I had thought it meant literally lying down together but River being River, it could have meant they had, well, fucked. I don't understand the how of it though XD but they're River and the Doctor so kudos to them I guess?

erm this was quite long sorry for that >⁠.⁠<

ever questioning, Tia 💌

Thanks Tia! I liked your Star-Crossed initial review too :) “I also love how this smashes any belief that River forces the Doctor to have sex with her or do anything that the Doctor is uncomfortable with.” because YES. Yes, yes, yes. Anyway. A cut before I respond to each of these things.

1) Right?? Swipe Right could not have been more direct in repeating that the Doctor was bothered by the idea of marriage/relationships, not by River herself. The way writers give us aroace Nine, and some people can only see their ship war? Ah well.

2) Oh my god I totally misused infatuation — editing that! How do words work haha. I was thinking along the lines of… “Someone you can walk into your life and make you see everything completely differently.” “Harvey said that to me. Oh, believe me, Captain. The Doctor has already done that to me, multiple times.” Falling in love with the same person again and again… like older couples who consistently put in the work to go on regular dates, lighting these new sparks with new experiences even after being together for decades… couples like the Doctor and River. (Oh, my sweet Mels. There is a thin line between infatuation and brainwashing </3 Personally, I would say student River was her infatuation phase — researching him for positive reasons instead of murderous ones.)

3) River barely noticing the different bodies is so. <3 This corporeal form that is so tied to a human's sense of identity — yet to River or the Master, it’s no different than a particularly-physically-taxing change of clothes. Who hasn’t regenerated a few times? River gets to judge him for insisting on the face of a twelve-year-old. River gets to shoot off his hats. (Eleven radiating his “How do you do fellow kids?” energy.)

4) Oh yes, Nine and Ten were so self-righteous about guns. (River was so cute with Ten, too!) Ah, if Eleven had treated UNIT the way Ten had. Rory with his auton wrist-gun. Bad girl Churchill with his revolver. Miscellaneous Americans. I like to think the heart-to-heart over Wilf’s gun coinciding perfectly with regeneration helped him get past it; Eleven’s no-gun rule seems a lot more “good men don’t need rules, today is not the day to find out why I have so many” vibes. He doesn’t trust himself to use guns, but he does trust River — he believes in her far more than she believes in herself. (That said, YES— I really love the idea of the Doctor being very supportive of young student River having her guns, so that she feels safe. Even if she has PTSD flashbacks/brainwashing relapses and tries to kill him, he couldn’t care less; his only priority is making sure she feels safe and comfy, when she can. I wrote a fic with that as a theme lmao.) (Why you gotta BREAK MY HEART (girl I’m glad you do). Eleven standing alone against the colorless, minimalist console, hands pressed over the secret gun compartment he prepared — to show her how much she means to him — paralyzed by grief, torn between the need to be near to her and the need to protect himself from further heartsbreak, listening to River move around the room. Do you think River had her favorite alpha-meson blaster in the Library? He'll never be able to retrieve it. Nardole's not going to know to grab a gun.)

5) Oh, Archipelago. The way it completely gets these two, from the glorious to the dysfunctional, to the root reasons they just work. Secrets call for trust; but trust without the need of secrets becomes something so beautiful. Also, there's something I appreciate about the handling of an aspect that seems to get confused (by those who speculate “it's not love, the timeline forced it” as per that infamous-ish Harbo Wholmes video (okay, it's infamous-ish to doctorriver fans. Harbo has some misses haha); like we need further proof having a wedding isn't the only way to whisper in your lover’s ear). Nine's “Don't you wanna see what that's like to be with me, not cause it's preordained or prophesyed, just two people bobbing about taking it slow?” leading to their sharing secrets no other Doctor and River had shared before. The exploration wherein — far from their relationship being forced by the timeline — the temporal constraints of the fixed points of their deaths actually mean they have to work even harder for the relationship to be what it is, yet they create together something cosmically beautiful out of tragedy (“you know how much I use [the VM] to bind our lives together.”).

6) Huh, yeah, “And finally, we lay together again, in the height of the dark” sounded to me about lying down too! I did get the impression that lying down was the default since the coral infection (at least for River). River does love her innuendos in their verbal dance of wit (aka flirting), but it’s her diary, not the Bible… I think she would be more explicit than that, even if she is aiming for brevity! It wouldn't fit the vibe (in my opinion). As you say, they're barely able to move. And not that aroace people never fuck, but (personally) the idea of that here does leave the unsavory impression that River would've gone with it at the last hour while knowing it's not his thing, with the “whether you know that or not — whether you feel that or not” line coming afterwards despite the fact that he certainly “knows” their future at this point, from front to back to front to back again. (Also “acting like a couple again” is so subjective since QPPs do a lot of things that are typically associated with couples? like the physical intimacy between River and Nine?) Not being aroace myself I will try to speak more generally to avoid speaking over people on a topic I'm not qualified to speak on — but I think, at least, it would be very disappointing if it meant that — I know that it means a lot to me (and I become very protective) when I see positively-represented aspects of my own identity that are rarely portrayed in a non-stereotyped light — and it would indicate at best a major lack of miscommunication between writers after Swipe Right, or worse: if the implication was to uncritically imply his orientation could be altered by the right partner…? Anyway: I still see it as queerplatonic personally, but thanks for pointing out that observation because I wouldn't have thought of that line! (Also, I can't speak for your twitter mutual, who I don't know, etc.)

Anyway, thank you for the ask! 💌

Love the SMALL CAPS and YOU ARE LEGENDARY for them.

[gabsreadingagain]

📖✍🏼🍓🧋🎧🌻𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙞𝙚𝙬𝙨

🧋Hi Friends! I finally had some time to sit down yesterday and write some of my long overdue reviews! I ordered sushi for dinner and I am spent the night watching the Yankee game and finishing up some reviews/content to post. I fell SO far behind on my review game. I easily have like 20 books to review LOL. I finished so many series this year so far I just haven’t found the time to review so I’m playing catchup!

✨I signed up for some PR Master Lists today so I am excited about that. I kept seeing all these cute posts and I wanted to experience the joy of opening a PR box lol. I hope I get some. I have some ARCs and ALCs that I am excited about. I’m gonna share a post about that soon! I am so lucky to be an audio influencer for @macmillan.audio. Being able to have access to any book before it’s published is such a privilege that I don’t take lightly!

💬: Do you have any fun plans for this summer? Tell me about it!

[13thdoctorposts]

Michelle Gomez and Sacha Dhawan Panel

Please note this IS NOT word for word, but so you can get a general gist of the panel. Both Michelle and Sacha were soooooo hilarious.

Whovians of all ages got to ask both of them questions.

This post is just Michelle’s and Sachs’s part of the panel there is a seperate post for Michelle’s panel and Sacha’s panel will be up in the next couple days!

Shouting from the back…

Sacha: Oh so boring!

Michelle: security, security!

Sacha walk to the stage

Michelle : Sacha Dhawan everyone!

Sacha: I was standing up the back and I thought… this is so boring…

(in a bad Scottish accent) “oh me and Peter Capaldi”

Michelle: laughing hard (can’t understand what she’s saying)

Sacha sitting down hugging Michelle

Sacha: so how are you?

Michelle: oh you know between here to hellish

Sacha: I thought I would join you

Michelle: if you thought it was boring then you’re gonna think it’s really boring now. Ok 2 for the price of 1

Moderator: I feel like a 3rd wheel… next question

Questioner: Green wing and the book club were on when I was young, do you take responsibility for warping a generation of millennials?

Michelle: yes, yes I do. I’ve landed myself in shows that are a little different.

Questioner: Missy has her own Audio series what was it like having her as the main character?

Michelle: well obviously it’s great to not have to put up with other people, lol. It’s brilliant because it keeps me connected to a world that I was thrilled to be part of and it’s a laugh because I live in NY and they record in London, so I’m in a booth in NY by myself.

Moderator walks off stage… feels like a 3rd wheel

Sacha takes over from the Moderator

Sacha: Alright let’s ask some real questions now!

Michelle: laughing again can’t understand what she’s saying

Moderator from the question line on the floor: long time watcher first time asker (room is laughing hysterically at this point) in green wing in your office after everyone has left there was scenes of you or you character doing some amazing weird and wonderful… disturbing things, who came up with that concept that your character is doing these obscure boarder line illegal things?

Michelle: I think at that point I was still learning how to be a professional so I was still feral at that point and they would lock the camera off in my office and then let me fuck around.

Questioner: Hi Michelle…. First of all Sacha don’t come for my girl, bro,

Sacha: yes I love it

Questioner: I’m Māori bro I’ll see you in the parking lot

Sacha: I love it… god it’s turning me on

Questioner: Fuck that was…

Crowd laughing hysterically can’t hear

Questioner: What’s the best acting advice you’ve been given throughout your career?

Michelle: if you’re serious about it don’t ever give up, there’s so much rejection, and it took me so long to get where I am today. Surround yourself with like minded people. And go to the theatre I feel like the real education is on stage.

Questioner: What was it like bringing a comedic edge to such a scary character in the flight attendant?

I’m classically trained and I did an Epsom play not known for it comedic tendencies, and the review came out and said Michelle Gomez plays one of the funniest performances in the Master Builder by Epsom, and I was like WHAT? I was quite offended, I don’t know I’m being funny is my answer to your question. Miranda in flight attendant was not meant to be funny she was meant to be very scary, thank you. (Laughing)

Questioner: Sacha when I was in line for my photo I asked about the Rasputin dance and you said you were saving it, is now the time?

Sacha: is it the time? You know when I did the dance I thought it was written in the script… but it wasn’t and for some reason I thought it said ‘the master dances’ I realise now everyone who was there that day must have been thinking ‘what is he doing?’ I don’t think I’ll be able to bust those moves out again. I remember we had 5 minutes to shoot that scene and under pressure it’s amazing what shapes you throw, I remember not being able to walk the next day.

Question asker: I think that’s the best Master moment to date… both cheers and boos from the audience, and a lot of laughter.

Sacha in a deep voice: Come here my boy

Michelle in a little voice: mmmk? (About the comment not coming to Sacha)

Questioner: I’m just wondering if it’s true you and Sacha are going to do a spin off called the Masters? (Please note the answer was in jest!)

Michelle:Um… oh… deny deny deny… um maybe 🤷……….. You heard it here first… maybe.

Questioner: Sacha I was wondering how it felt when you replaced Jodie Whittaker?

Sacha: ahhhh…

Michelle: oh fuck…

Sacha: we’ll I knew about it

Michelle: oh he knew about it (The love/hate flirting they do is comedy gold, the chemistry is on point)

Sacha: I knew it was going to happen a couple months before and before I played the Master I always thought I’d love to play the Doctor, I’d love to be able to do it. But obviously being the Master I thought there’s no way I’d ever be the Doctor so it was amazing that the opportunity came up and I LOVED IT. But I did realise the Doctor has way to much pressure, the Master can come in mess things up then leave because I don’t have to worry about the mess but the Doctor then has to clean it up, so as much as it was nice doing it for a bit I was happy to give it back to Jodie.

Questioner: What are your next projects?

Michelle: We have a strike at the moment so nothing.

Sacha: I’ve got a show coming out in the UK called Wolf it’s a dark detective series with a a black comedy element to it it comes out in July I think

Michelle: and are you playing a Wolf?

Sacha (side eyeing Michelle): no, lol

Questioner: This is for both of you last time Missy interacted with a master it was the simm!master

Michelle: oh yeah 🙄

Questioner: They had an interesting dynamic my question is what do you think the dynamic between your Masters would be like?

Michelle: you’ll have to watch and see (again this was in jest… maybe letting us know to message RTD more to get on it! Lol)

Sacha: I think it’s going to be very sexual, the Master is a little bit in love with himself so

Michelle: oh my god… ok… oh yeah it would be dead sexy

Sacha: and slightly violent

Michelle: what is wrong with you…😏 ok honey 😎

Questioner: If your 2 Masters were on scene together what chaos do you think they would get up to that isn’t… that? (Again the answer is in jest)

Michelle: You’ll have to watch and see I don’t think you understand you’re getting an exclusive here. What would we get up to? Hmmm… you understand we’re actors we don’t really say the cruel stuff that’s written for us.

Sacha: what chaos would you like to see us get up to?

Questioner: I don’t know… kidnapping the Doctor doing crazy stuff…

Michelle: oh that’s what you mean, oh right yes, I see what you mean, so I’d stick him in a trunk and drive him to Paris and we’d have lunch and then we’d let the Doctor out and he’d have to get his own way home, and then we’d travel back in time and we’ll take you with us and we’ll go to the 1920s and we would be in Jazz club.

Questioner: what mundane superpower would you have?

Michelle: I hate emptying the dishwasher, I don’t mind loading it, but I don’t like rinsing that annoys me too so anything to do with the dish washer. Dishes are dumb.

Someone in the crowd; get Sacha to do it

Moderator: you know they don’t live together? Laughing

Sacha: after a night out when I’m a little drunk and I need to get home, in London getting home is a nightmare so if I could just click my fingers and be in bed

Michelle: whose bed?

Laughing so loud can’t hear what is said

Questioner: Which other masters have you meet in real life?

Sacha: I worked with Derek Jacobi, but I’ve not met anyone else, I did try following John Simm on instagram but he didn’t follow me back, that was a bit awkward

Moderator pointing at Michelle covertly trying to remind Sacha that he’s met her now

Sacha: oh yeah we’ve met (looking at Michelle)

Michelle: ummm… I did a season with John Simm, so you got 2 for the price of 1 there… I like to mess about a little bit between takes, and I thought this was very funny… John didn’t… I got someone from catering to get me a pear and I stuck it down my top, cos he had to go down and get a locket and so he pulled out the pear… because I have a lovely pear…

Questioner: that’s awesome

Michelle: I thought so.

Questioner: if you ever get a chance to meet Eric Roberts, he just came to Armageddon, I could have looked in his eyes all day long, I hope you get to meet him one day too.

Sacha: I just realised I did meet Eric Roberts actually (crowd laughs at his inability to remember the Masters he’s met)

Questioner: did could you look in his eyes all day

Sacha: no, but he’s very handsome and super lovely as well.

Moderator: did you know he had played the Master?

Sacha: I do now… (laughing) no I did, I did know (crowd is skeptical, Michelle looking off going lalalalala)

Questioner: With you Michelle we had our first female master and then with you Sacha our first non white Master, and then it feels like the Doctor is just copying you now that we had a woman Doctor and now a non white Doctor. How does it feel that the Doctor is just copying the Master now?

Sacha: I think not necessarily just with me as the Master or with Jodie, I think being part of Doctor who this time around it felt like the show creates some extreme worlds but it keeps an eye on what’s going on in the world generally and I think that’s, I’m really proud to be a part of it in that way. I’ve mentioned earlier I wanted to be part of the whoniverse maybe years earlier but actually being part of it this time round felt right and I kind of, even though I have some extreme storyline’s with Jodie about Gallifrey, I don’t know, I always thought about what was going on in the world and I think the show reflects that and I wanted to reflect that in my performance as well so I feel immensely proud about that.

Michelle: similarly for me it really felt like it was time to shake things up, why can’t the master be a woman? Be a mistress? And I felt like I got a lot of love from the transgender community and I get it, I understand it, like being an Uber nerd growing up and not feeling like I fit in, so I felt like I was paying homage to that in a big way. It felt like it was time, like it was current. Steven Moffatt always said it was the best person for the job at the time it didn’t matter (if it was a man or a woman)

*Coming soon… there will be a part 3 with Sacha… I just don’t have time to post now as I’m heading back home from this iconic trip, so Sachas panel will be a couple days away and Part 1 with just Michelle is already up.

Some random notes:

Let’s just say our little spy master isn’t afraid let his feminine self shine, lol. They have a really funny and flirty chemistry together.

They were sat next to each other at the autograph tables with a volunteer between each actor, Sacha and the volunteer swapped spots so Sacha and Michelle could sit next to each other where Michelle proceed to write on posit notes and throw them at him, and they were quiet funny together sitting there.

[du04]

February Wrap-Up

Hi everyone, hope February has treated you well. Hope you've been up to some cool things.

This month’s wrap-up is, in the manner of this very same month, rather short (at least on paper, it felt like 5 years to me). Hope you enjoy it nonetheless <3

Games

On the first of this month, I woke up to the trailer of Death Stranding 2. Being a fan of the original one, this was great news, and the release date being foreseen in 2024, I will definitely find a proper time to replay it before the second instalment, since it will probably come to PC ‘only’ in 2026. Regarding the trailer itself, I was surprised at how different it is from the first teaser and my mind was blown. I also can’t wait for the film :)

For what I actually, played, here goes:

Powerwash Simulator, as mentioned in my 2023 Wrap-Up, I have been playing this game (only) while listening to audiobooks and podcasts, which is a perfect combination, as it helps me to release steam/pressure while listening to a long passage of something stressful and/or awful happening.

Played some more Immortal Fenyx (see last month’s review, still a great game)

Made a spreadsheet of games I haven’t finished, to try and complete them, so I played some Hue (last opened on 27th December 2022!) and I think I’m close to finishing it but also not feeling bothered. Same reason for playing a little bit of The House of Da Vinci, which I last opened in June 2023.

I don’t think this method of forcing myself to play was a great idea because if you take the latter, it is a well-made game, but my mindset is to just finish as quickly as possible, which is hindering my enjoyment

Books

Dirt Town by Hayley Scrivenor is a dark mystery set in a small Australian rural town. A 12-year-old girl does not come home, the investigation on her disappearance digs up collateral secrets.

I found this to be a complete page-turner. In terms of structure and even themes, I found it similar to Beartown, which is an (audio)book I really enjoyed too. Revolving third-person POVs, small-town inhabitants and their secrets, a crime at the centre of the story, the name of the place consisting of an adjective related to the place + town (lol). Just a couple of funny similarities, the story is wildly different with unique characters.

Dirtown is more of a character study with a mystery at its centre, rather than the opposite. The events unravelling in the narrators lives as we’re going through the investigation are the main thrilling events. This makes for an easy re-read. I absolutely loved learning about the different characters, and it’s been a while since a book has made me impatient and excited to go home to continue reading.

The last few pages really made me cry.

4.75/5

I will be looking forward to Hayley Scrivenor’s next book; I’ve heard she’ll keep her characters’ depth and fullness at the centre of her writing, which is a great thing, and that it’ll be happening in a small town, which is a setting I tend to love.

I started but did not finish Internet for the People. A subtitled “manifesto” that talks about how technology and capitalism affect the internet and society. It explores different ideas for making the internet more democratic. This book focuses specifically on why and how the internet came to be a privatised business tool, focusing on the United States. I tend to skim synopsis, and picking this up, I thought it would be about how the internet and the web are being reappropriated by small communities, which it is not.

I would have liked a different angle than this one took, but that’s just due to my own expectations and interests. DNF at 30%.

I really thought I would have finished my current graphic novel read and the first volume of Crime and Punishment, or any other book, but I didn’t; I haven’t felt like doing much at all but binge-watch Gilmore girls.

Podcasts

Overthink. I stumbled upon this lovely podcast where the two hosts, who are Doctors in Philosophy, discuss contemporary, everyday topics through a philosophical lens. I’ve listened to the episodes on anxiety (the best episode so far), nostalgia (a few insightful comments) and cottagecore (big fan of David’s points in this one). I highly recommand, it is entertaining, smart, and very accessible.

Music

Discovered 1001 Albums, I can’t commit to doing anything every single day so it’s not for me, but it’s a brilliant idea: everyday it gives you one album to listen to, I did it for one day, and it was (What’s the Story) Morning Glory?, I thought most of the songs sounded the same lol, but they are fine nonetheless. I’ve always liked the song Don’t Look Back in Anger.

I also bought a cheap concert ticket for Nils Frahm in May :)

Series

In the second half of the month, I wasn’t so much in a gaming mood (or anything mood), and feeling quite low, I ended up continuing Gilmore girls after a 2-month break. I’m glad I took such a break because I believe ‘binge-watching’ it made me feel too accustomed. Coming back to the humour made me laugh again, just like at the beginning.

Also, happy to hear Evil season 4 is releasing in May! So glad it’s getting a proper ending, and I’m sure it will be well-rounded.

Films

Saltburn (2023) was aesthetically strong but highly underwhelming in its narrative. It started out great, but is So Empty, it really shocked me. I thought it was the perfect example of the word “pretentious”, that is, it pretends to be something it is not (too often I feel like this word is not employed the right way, used as a synonym for snobbish or highbrow when it really should not be). Barry Keoghan truly shines in this, and I still had a relatively entertaining time.

I watched Heat (1995) without knowing much about it, it was on MUBI and about to leave, and was vaguely aware of it because of this thing:

And wow! The tension is perfect, capturing my attention completely, I loved all the silence, as well as the minimalist soundtrack and dialogues. I would rewatch it if the occasion presented itself.

Passages (2023) was fine, and I want to see more messy and emotionally impulsive main characters like in this film.

Birdman (2014), I remember my mum raving about it when it first came out, and as it was leaving MUBI (you can see a pattern here) I gave it a try. Some shots were truly ingenious, and storywise, I always love a touch of magical realism. I feel, had I been more familiar with the Broadway scene, I would have more to think about.

Misc

Philosophy

I’ve been looking online for remote-learning certificates (1 year max) in Philosophy from regular universities but didn’t find anything that I found interesting, affordable, completely remote and part-time (I mean, with those criteria I’m not surprised). I ended up enrolling in the EDX course on Introduction to Philosophy, and it’s a lot of fun. The approach to teaching is satisfying and I appreciate the humour. The topic of God’s non/existence is taken as a canvas to learn about philosophical “grammar”, as well as learning about existing arguments, which I find highly enjoyable. There’s still a lot to learn with this course and beyond: exciting :)

Quiz: MLQ

I stumbled upon this very short questionnaire that assesses your level of “Presence”(feeling of meaning in life) and “Search” (active exploration and pursuit of meaning). I took it just for fun as my attitude towards meaning is “be busy, enjoy things” and I’m the last person to think about the significance of my life, as it is non-existent, and I think this concept is a little bit ridiculous, just a little bit.

If you’re interested in trying it out, go directly to the last page and only after read the results on the 2nd page. > Here <

Cooking

I used to be a self-described cook and food enjoyer until January 2023 when the spirit of Auguste Gusteau decided it had enough of me and left my body. From then on, I had to be on my own, which consisted of me making pasta salads, some protein with rice, and later on Basic Bagels, tortellini, and instant noodles for 6 months straight. Well, this month changed a little bit as I made 1 recipe! Woo-hoo! Thanks to this recipe with 5 ingredients: bread, sour cream, jalapeños, egg and chorizo. Easy, filling and relatively healthy? And that’s it… one step at a time, right?

Life

This month felt so long. When I realised that early January was only two months ago, I could sense a feeling of existential crisis peeking out of my heart (which I promptly whacked back in 👍).

Broke up with the BF.

Been feeling mentally tired. Didn’t feel like doing anything, nor felt like reviewing anything. Hence, why this month’s post is relatively succinct.

Started learning how to dance a bit. Loving the warm days and the collapse of humanity they’re bringing with them. Enjoying my solitude. Planned a trip to Budapest with a friend.