#it's a really america-specific way of writing dates and literally everyone else (except for a couple other countries) will be confused by i

[steakout-05]

very long post about how i as an Australian think the American date structure is silly and confusing under the cut

as an Australian i already think America is pretty funny, like the imperial system is both confusing and incredibly funny to me, but what i really don't get is the way dates are written in America

like.... for context, in Australia, we write days like day/month/year. and i like this because the most important information is the thing you read first. you want to know what day it is, you just look at the first two digits you see and you're done!! in some other counties like Japan and South Korea, they write it like year/month/day, which i also think is ok because it's still in a cohesive and easy to read order. you just go to the end of the date to see what day it is and it's simple!! it's all good! it's easy to read! this is nice!

but for some reason, the dates in America are written like month/day/year and i'm just..... i'm so confused!?!??!? why would you jump to the MIDDLE of the date to see what day it is???? it's so cluttered and jumpy and trying to read it in order is just... kinda irritating. the most important and immediately needed information is shifted to the middle of the date ans then you gotta go back and then jump forward again if you wanna read the whole thing and i'm just. actually bamboozled at that. who did that. who is responsible for that blunder at the workplace. i will find them and i will break their kneecaps and i-

ALSO you have no idea how many times this date format has absolutely screwed up schedules and post dates for me. imagine that there's like an online event or something coming up and they have a schedule for what day they're holding it, but it's just written like 05/03/2024. my Australian ass is going to read that as the 5th of March 2024, but someone in America is gonna read that is the 3rd of May 2024. do you see how confusing this can become. there is zero distinction between the two dates because they're written in the exact same way but have a different structure. this is fine for dates that go over the number 12 or are the same number, but it's still confusing and frustrating, especially when the website doesn't say what timezone setting you're on or won't let you change it (which some of them don't). it's quite a specific issue but it's still an issue and i hate it i don't like it i want it fixed please patch

maybe i just have a more logical way of thinking and i like having things be in order, but goddamn just write your dates properly i can't take it anymore /nsrs

[star-anise]

Ok, I'll bite. What *is* the difference between Bridgerton and Jane Austen in relationship to their skirts?

Oh! Not in their costuming, just in their general *waves hands* everything. It's a comment I see a lot about Bridgerton: "Well, it's not much like Austen, is it?"

That's because there are 200 years of literary history between the two, and they have not been empty!

This ended up being 1.5k words, but when I put stuff under a readmore, people don't actually read it and then just yell at me because of a misread of the 1/10th of the post they did read. Press j to skip or get ready to do a lot of scrolling (It takes four generous flicks to get past on my iPhone).

First I'll say my perspective on this is hugely shaped by Sherwood Smith, who has done a lot of research on silver fork novels and the way the Regency has been remembered in the romance genre.

The Regency and Napoleonic eras stretch from basically the 1790s to 1820, and after that, it was hard to ignore the amount of social change happening in Britain and Europe. The real watershed moment is the 1819 Peterloo Massacre, where 60,000 working-class people protesting for political change were attacked by a militia. The issues of poverty, class, industrialization, and social change are inescapable, and we end up with things like the 1832 Reform Act and 1834 Poor Law.

This is why later novelists, like Charles Dickens and Elizabeth Gaskell, are so concerned with the experiences of the urban poor. Gaskell's North and South has been accurately described as "Pride and Prejudice for socialists."

So almost as soon as it ended, people started to look back and mythologize the Regency as a halcyon era, back when rich people could just live their rich lives and fret about "only" having three hundred pounds a year to live on. Back when London society was the domain of hereditary landowners, when you weren't constantly meeting with jumped-up industrialists and colonials.

Jane Austen is kind of perfect for this because she comes at the very end of the long eighteenth century, and her novels show hints of the tremors that are about to completely reshape England, but still comfortably sit in the old world. ("The Musgroves, like their houses, were in a state of alteration, perhaps of improvement. The father and mother were in the old English style, and the young people in the new. Mr and Mrs Musgrove were a very good sort of people; friendly and hospitable, not much educated, and not at all elegant. Their children had more modern minds and manners.")

Sherwood Smith covers the writers who birthed the Silver Fork genre in detail, but there's one name that stands out in its history more than any other: Georgette Heyer.

Georgette Heyer basically single-handedly established the Regency Romance as we know it today. Between 1935 and 1972, she published 26 novels set in a meticulously researched version of London of the late 18th and early 19th century. She took Silver Fork settings and characters and turned them into a highly recognizable set of tropes, conventions, and types. (As Sherwood points out, her fictional Regency England isn't actually very similar to the period as it really happened; it's like Arthurian Camelot, a mythical confection with a dash of truth for zest.)

Regency Romance is an escapist genre in which a happy, prosperous married life is an attainable prize that will solve everything for you. Georgette Heyer's novels are bright, sparkling, delightful romps through a beautiful and exotic world. Her female characters have spirit and vivacity, and are allowed to have flaws and make mistakes without being puritanically punished for them. Her romances have real unique sparks to them. She's able to write a formula over and over without it becoming dull.

And.... well. The essay that introduced me to Heyer still, in my opinion, says it best:

Here's the thing about Georgette Heyer: she hates you. Or, okay, she doesn't hate you, exactly. It's just that unless you are white, English, and upper class (and hale, and hearty, and straight, and and and), she thinks you are a lesser being. [...W]ith Heyer, I knew where I stood: somewhere way below the bottom rung of humanity. Along with everyone else in the world except Prince William and four of his friends from Eton, which really took away the sting. But my point is: if you are not that white British upper-class person of good stock and hearty bluffness and a large country estate, the only question for you is which book will contain a grimly bigoted caricature of you featuring every single stereotyped trait ever associated with your particular group. (You have to decide for yourself if really wonderful female characters and great writing are worth the rest of it.)

So Heyer created the genre, but she exacerbated the flaw that was always at the heart of fiction about the Regency, was that its appeal was not having to deal with the inherent rot of the British aristocracy. I think part of why it's such a popular genre in North America specifically is that we often don't know much British history, so we can focus more on the perfume and less on the dank odor it's hiding.

And like, escapism is not a bad thing. Romance writers as a community have sat down and said: We are an escapist genre. The Romance Writers of America, one of the biggest author associations out there, back when they were good, have foundationally said: "Two basic elements comprise every romance novel: a central love story and an emotionally satisfying and optimistic ending." A strong part of the community argue that publishing in the genre is a "contract" between author and reader: If it's marketed as a romance book, there's a Happily Ever After. If there's no Happily Ever After, it's not romance.

It's important for people to be able to take a break from the stresses of their lives and do things that are enjoyable. But the big question the romance genre in particular has to deal with is, who should be allowed to escape? Is it really "escapist" if only white, straight, upper class, able-bodied thin cis people get to escape into it? In historical romance, this is especially an issue for POC and LGBTQ+ people. It's taken a lot of work, in a genre dominated by the Georgette Heyers of the world, to try to hew out the space for optimistic romances for people of colour or LGBTQ+ people. These are minority groups that deal with a literally damaging amount of stress in real lives; they are in especial need of sources of comfort, refuge, community, and encouragement. For brief introductions to the issue, I can give you Talia Hibbert on race, and KJ Charles on LGBTQ+ issues.

Up until the 1990s, the romance genre evolved slowly. It did evolve; Sarah Wendell and Candy Tan's Beyond Heaving Bosoms charts the demise of the "bodice-ripper" genre as it became more acceptable for women to have and enjoy sex. The historical romance genre became more accommodating to non-aristocratic heroines, or ones that weren't thin or conventionally pretty. The first Bridgerton book, The Duke and I, was published in 2000, and has that kind of vibe: Its characters are all white but not all of them are aristocrats, its heroines are frequently not conventionally beautiful and occasionally plump, and its cultivation to modern sensibility is reflected in its titles, which reference popular media of today.

This is just my impression, but I think that while traditional mainstream publishing was beginning to diversify in the 1990s, the Internet was what really made diverse romance take off. Readers, reviewers, and authors could talk more freely on the internet, which allowed books to become unlikely successes even if their publishers didn't promote them very much. Then e-publishing meant that authors could market directly to their readers without the filter of a publishing house, and things exploded. Indie ebooks proved that there was a huge untapped market.

One of my favourite books, Zen Cho's Sorcerer to the Crown, is an example of what historical romance is like today; it's a direct callback and reclamation of Georgette Heyer, with a dash of "Fuck you and all your prejudices" on top of it. It fearlessly weaves magic into a classic Heyer plot, maintaining the essential structure while putting power into the hands of people of colour and non-Western cultures, enjoying the delights of London society while pointing out and dodging around the rot. It doesn't erase the ugliness, but imagines a Britain that is made better because its poor, its immigrants, its people of colour, and the foreign countries it interacts with have more power to make their voices heard and to enforce their wills. Another book I've loved that does the same thing is Courtney Milan's The Duke Who Didn't.

So then... Bridgerton the TV show is trying to take a book series with a very middle-of-the-road approach to diversity, differing from Heyer but not really critiquing her, and giving it a facelift to bring it up to date.

So to be honest, although it's set in the same time period as Austen, it's not in the least her literary successor. It's infinitely more "about" the past 30 years of conversation and art in the romance genre than it is about books written 200 years ago.

[holtzyrans]

EXCUSE ME LETTERKENNY AU?????

HELL YEAH BABEY

so back in novemberish i got a call that i was fired from my job while i was on my way to end things with the guy i’d been seeing, and i ended up with like. nothing but free time for a month and watched all of letterkenny. the fic idea’s been in my head for ages and i dont think i’ll ever actually write it? so here’s a basic bulleted outline also this post 100% helped inspire it

Jack is Wayne, obviously. He’s fresh off a breakup with Camilla, and he’s doing Bad. (Camilla is fine in this au because i have a weird soft spot for Pretty Blonde Girl who literally only appeared once in comic. She just broke up w him because she wasn’t feeling it anymore)

Shitty is Squirrely Dan. He’s a few months into a women’s studies course and he wants to tell everyone he can about it.

Ransom and Holster and Jonesy and Riley. I don’t feel like I need to explain this one at all. I didn’t know which of them was which until like season 3 that’s all im saying

Lardo is Katy. She’s dating Ransom and Holster, who aren’t dating each other (or are they? no one’s quite sure, least of all them. Threesomes have been had but we don’t need to talk about it, rans, it’s fine. Our dicks never touched, okay?)

This is where things diverge from canon. It’s not gonna be a retelling of letterkenny, more just adopting some of their tropes/character archetypes. Also this is gonna get long so i’m putting the rest of it under a cut

Chowder and Farmer are Mr and Mrs McMurray. Less of the general obnoxiousness though and more just every time we see them they can’t keep their hands off each other. Lardo and Farmer have also hooked up at some point you can’t take this away from me. Chowder and Jack have no idea how to interact with each other but are also very close friends. They don’t understand it either

Dex is the town bartender/handyman. He has also hooked up with both Chowder and Farmer because I deserve this.

Nursey is the Bonnie McMurray character. He works part time with Dex at the bar, where they fight/flirt constantly. Every time he’s mentioned there is a sigh and a “Derek Nurse....” Everyone in the town would like very much to kiss him. He’s not related to Chowder and Farmer at all, and has also hooked up with them because i deserve this 

Whiskey and Tango are Stewart and Roald. I have nothing to expand on here specifically I just think it’s funny.

I have nothing for Dary or Tanis or Ford but none of their characters really mesh. I don’t know. Someone else can figure this out.

ANYWAYS

Regular town life gets turned upside down when American baker Eric Bittle comes into town

He’s on a tour across Canada and the US finding recipes for his upcoming cookbook, which is all based on small town cuisine across north america, and he ends up in Samwell, Ontario

This is not a town that is known for anything except for their pretty good community hockey team. they got second place at the Province finals. It was a big deal. They definitely don’t have any recipes their town is known for, but Bitty ends up at the local bar, where he meets Nursey and Dex, who introduce him to and Chowder and Farmer, who introduce him to Jack and the crew, and then he just sort of. doesnt leave?

He’s supposed to be working on his book but we all know how Bitty is with procrastination, and also there is this very handsome gruff farmer who’s always holding a german shepherd puppy and bitty may or may not ignore calls from his agent for like a month, until she ends up driving into middle of nowhere Ontario to make sure he hasn’t been murdered or kidnapped

So Bitty leaves, and finishes his book, and there’s a whole chapter on Samwell that gets scrapped because there’s not actually any recipes in it but it’s so charming that somehow it gets turned into its own whole half memoir of his time there half picture of life in small town canada and him and Jack keep in very close touch (you know, for research)

and then eventually he has to go back to town to finish the book and him and jack kiss and he stays forever and they throw super soft birthday parties and jack beats up assholes and homophobes and lardo eventually dumps ransom and holster for shitty and ransom and holster realize they may or may not have been using her as an excuse to kiss each other and everyone is happy

[bandomslayed]

I’m not saying you should focus more on racism, I’m just saying that that’s something that the community as a whole needs to focus on and try to repair, I’m sure they all already know that people don’t like their ships. If that’s an issue, then groups can have a strict age limit. Easy solve. The other things are things that can be taught and learned but with hostility all that’s going to happen is a deeper divide. You said you wanted to argue with people about the things you don’t like that they do in this community. I’m paraphrasing, but why not instead want to educate them. No one will ever react well to feeling like they’re being ridiculed or patronized. People worth spending your time on are the ones you can talk to without it being a shitshow. We’re having a dialogue. I’ve felt this entire time like everything I say, someone is going to search for one thing to deliberately misinterpret or magnify unnecessarily when, if there’s something that they have an issue with, it could be a perfect opportunity to educate me instead of people being hostile. I’m college educated and can think critically, I’m moderately well spoken, I’m open to instructive criticisms and discussing things that aren’t agreed upon so I’m just sort of confused by the fact that what I’m saying is being picked apart by other anons and to a degree, you. You all want to change my mind about age gaps, despite me being with someone older irl and feeling safe and genuinely valued for the first time in a relationship in my life so why do you think that calling my dead grandpa names, redirecting the conversation and then kinda mocking me when I attempt to understand wholly and agree with some of the things you’re saying? That’s not going to convince me or anyone else. It just makes people feel defensive. Reiterating here that I’m not saying YOU specifically need to talk about racism more, and I’m not trying to diminish your experience or anything like that In just saying that those topics (discrimination of any kind, abuse of any kind) in the community are things we should be discussing instead of ships we think aren’t comfortable. I feel uncomfortable with relationships in real life and in rp all the time but that isn’t up to me to say it’s wrong or bad. It’s no ones right to tell any two consenting adults that what they’re doing is wrong. But it is a human right to tell someone when they’re being insensitive, and that’s a flaw in the community that people can be educated on and learn to handle with more sensitivity and knowledge but we’re never going to reach that point if we’re all just hostile and cruel to one another. Also reiterating that I’m not using personal examples to get cred, I just like examples because I think using them shows where I’m coming from so that any person who wants to have a dialogue can have a frame of reference for why my opinions are what they are on any topic. If I’m wrong, or insensitive, or just kinda dumb I want to know that but simply telling me I’m wrong or insensitive or dumb doesn’t teach me how not to me. And this doesn’t just mean me, I mean the whole community. It will never improve if we all just talk about the things we don’t like and give no feasible solutions.

alright i see what you want so let me switch to my white pleaser voice and deliver since you're so keen on being patronizing and in the same breath, acting like me taking what you say "the wrong way" is the problem. in bullet points so next time u come back to keep going at it u can pinpoint exactly what it is i misconstrued because u will do it anyway.

you're asking the community as a whole to care more about racism but you're talking to me who's leading the conversation in the first place. i understand you didn't imply i specifically should care more about it, but you're still using racism to discredit my point of view on age gap relationships being an important topic to discuss as well, and watering it down to just me not liking people's plots when that is not the message.

nobody is telling anyone how to live their lives. im bringing awareness to the fact that this culture is not okay. it's dangerous to our young. it NEEDS to be uncomfortable to you (you, plural) to invite to this so called critical thinking.

im not saying your partner doesn't have a right to be loving or grandpa and grandma had abuse masked as a good relationship. im saying, since it needs to be spelled out with no room for misinterpretation; the culture behind someone 10+ years older finding it completely okay to pursue someone that much younger — especially when we're talking 18 - 30 age range — needs to be looked at more closely. it's not safe in general. do exceptions exist? absolutely, but the whole two consenting adults point is a terrible one to make when at 18, you're considered that when you're still essentially just a child.

a strict age limit, which most groups adopt now, does little to actually prevent age gap relationships within roleplays. moreso, uneven power dynamics within plots being glamorized. my boss is not over 5 years older than me, but he is my boss. kpop boybands don't have age gaps of 10+ years in groups, usually, but there is a leader most times acting like a father figure, not to mention korean culture is heavy on emphasizing age-related hierarchical order, so a literal still wet behind the ears child establishing a romantic connection with someone who is not their equal? dangerous.

now let's halt. i already told you, i don't give a shit about respectability politics. it is not my job to be nice and educate anyone. and i don't mean just on this blog... most of you whites have come to assume and expect, even, that poc will be subservient, docile, and always willing to switch and nicely explain to you why the very core of the way you think about the world because you grew up sheltered w/e is not the whole picture for everyone. the worst part? most of them do. most of them do put their thinking caps on and write these novel worthy, intelligent, respectful, calculated think pieces only for the white in question to turn around and still deem it aggressive, etc. i don't do that. that is labor that most of you do not deserve.

the implication that there are feasible solutions for these problems that don't require for people to literally rework their entire mindset is naive at best. what am i supposed to do? be like nooo don't be racist, racism is bad BECAUSE it hurts people. i think all of you are old enough to know that by now. you definitely have enough internet exposure to know that, even if you grew up in all white sundown town america.

i explain my points. i actually explain my points more than the average person, yet here we are still saying im not doing enough to educate those around me as if it was my responsibility to change the way people think with sugar spice and everything nice so they feel their hand is held and it's safe to make a mistake that will consequently hurt other people as many times as they need to make it to finally grasp the reality of it and be able to just... not do that in the future. when no. no. when you hurt me, im allowed to react emotionally, not intellectually. when im angry and upset and still explaining why, its YOUR job to swallow it down and listen to what im saying, because YOU hurt me. i don't owe you civility (again; you, plural). i especially don't owe you civility when ive given you nothing but in the past and the end result is still me being an aggro freak who doesn't care for your precious feelings.

you're also assuming things. for example, assuming that im mocking you specifically when i really have not done that. if im going to mock you, im going to reply to your anon and say "okay stupid", then yeah, im mocking you. otherwise? don't assume im directing anything at you.

we're having a dialogue and this whole time all you've done is tell me to stop talking. your messages have all, in essence, said, if people want to date other people who have a shitton of years on them, that is not a problem and you look prettier talking about something else. yes, that's also paraphrased. you didn't say that, of course, but why are we still here if not because you feel personally scrutinized over the reaction to the life examples that you willingly provided?

nobody is trying to change YOUR mind, you're just not willing to consider that your age gap relationships that have been beautiful and loving and safe coexist within a culture that is wicked. a person who's 10+ older than me, 24, has no business seeing me as a potential partner. it's not appropriate. yet if they do, and i also see them as a potential partner, there's nothing inherently evil about that specific instance. it is the circumstances (past), that lead to this kind of thinking in the first place what im asking everyone to analize and understand. and it does matter. it matters as much as racism, abuse, ooc mistreatment of rp partners. again, issues do not queue and wait for something to end so they can begin anew. every conversation i choose to have i consider worth having. you're free to stay out if you don't deem it important.

you're exhausting me thinking by turning my inbox into ap debate we're achieving grand things sooo hope this helps 🖤

[sleepless-in-starbucks]

Earth, Pluto, and Sombrero Galaxy for the space asks ( ˘ ³˘)♥ ( ˘ ³˘)♥ ( ˘ ³˘)♥

Earth- Where’s your home?Because I like to be a Vague Shit I’mma answer with America. As soon as I can flee tho it’ll be Canada or somewhere fun.

Pluto- What time is it right now where you are?Hmmmm Triple Kiss I feel like you’re looking to tell me it’s bedtime again hmmmm. But for you’re information it’s about six thirty (by the time I finished the list tho it’s now like. eight thirty ish)

Sombrero Galaxy: Do you have a crush right now?Laughs in aroI do have several platonic crushes/squishes if that’s what you meant tho. And I am treating them just like one should treat crushes: telling no one and never facing my feelings. I’m good at this alright.

And idk if you saw the tags or not but you fell within the 90% chance of getting space Remy ranting because damnit I love him. In this case it’s more like... sneak peak at an idea for a fic I might write one day in the distant future of whenever school stops hating me though.

So it’s losleep because I’m predictable af

Remy who’s gone most of his life slowly having the life stomped out of him

He’s always loved space but no one wanted to listen

Like. Ever.

His rants got shorter and shorter until they just stopped happening

He started wearing his sunglasses both to hide his excitement when someone else starting talking about space (so he wouldn’t get called out or mocked) and to hide his hurt when he was mockingly called ‘starboy’(If anyone had meant it nicely, he would have loved that nickname)

He switched his constellation covered leather jacket for a plain one

By the time he made it to high school he was a whole different person

Dead inside, dead outside, missed half his classes (but still passed them all), sarcastic and generally considered the most infamous bad boy in the school

Logan of course wants nothing to do with him

Remy’s a mess, Logan’s not, and ap courses are hard enough without a bad influence

Remy doesn’t have the zeal or care to chase Logan in this one (which given my love of flirty Remy is so crazy, I know

)But a biology trip to an aquarium ends up with them as bus buddies

Logan expected to hate it but Remy’s normally quiet unless you give him something to sass so the ride there is surprisingly peacefully

And when they get there Remy lets Logan go wherever he wants and look at whatever (Remy mostly came on the trip because the teacher said it was mandatory to passing and he forgot to call in sick the morning of)Logan starts out just looking at the exhibits, pointing out a few facts

Remy doesn’t seem the most interested in what he’s saying, but sometimes his mouth will tip upwards just a little or an eyebrow raise will pass his shades

And Logan takes that positively and slowly but surely starts talking more and more and longer and longer until he finds one sign talking about sharks and just absolutely rants about all the sharks he can name, excitedly, making connections haphazardly as he jumps between species

Remy’s smile is nearly a grin at this point and damnit it’s a good thing he’s wearing sunglasses because the amount of pure adoration in his eyes was rather embarrassing

Logan glances over at him halfway through his explanation of thresher sharks- one he had been happily going on with for a full five minutes- and his speech falters, much to Remy’s disappointment

He mumbles an apology and starts to head for a different exhibit when Remy stops him like ‘??? why you stop’

And Logan looks disappointed in himself when he says he didn’t realize he had been going on so long, he is sincerely sorry, especially since Remy’s stuck with him and hence can’t walk away from his infodumping

Remy’s just ‘honey why would I want to walk away’

Logan is Surprised because like poor Remy no one’s ever wanted to listen to him rant

He tries to call Remy on faking interest and then Remy recites several new shark facts right back at him so it seems he does care

Logan’s still on edge about ranting more in the aquarium but Remy pokes him a lot for more info, and they spend the entire ride back chatting about it (read: Remy slowly falls more and more in love with Logan while the nerd continues to explain every wonder of the deep sea he can come up with)

The school has a whole scandal over the smartest kid suddenly hanging out a lot with the bad boy

They wonder what they’re planning when really every lunch is just a chance to do more ocean info dumping

As they get closer, conversation shifts into more areas: into different sciences, into maths (most of which is Remy squinting suspiciously at Logan for understanding all the formulas), into talking about fashion and movies and everything under the sun, really, except space

Logan’s started to notice how Remy will pause whenever the topic moves to space before skillfully redirecting them into another topic

Logan knows that hesitation- the hesitation of wanting to say so much and fearing it’ll be shot down immediately, a sort of fear that’s not natural so much as it is taught, and he starts to wonder if Remy’s as uncaring as he likes to pretend he is

After all, Logan came to high school swearing off feelings in general, along with ocean talk- avoiding not only a specific type of ridicule but avoiding getting hurt by any insults

It’s not that far of a stretch to assume Remy did something similar, just in a different way

So Logan, using his Big Brain suggests that one of their study dates (yeah they started having study dates a while ago. techincally they’re not dating, just studying/chatting but like,,,,,,,,,,,,, yeah) happens closer to night, sprouting some mostly bs about the brain absorbing more information at night

Remy doesn’t see anything coming so he agrees

They start off studying in Logan’s house but then Logan says he needs a break and starts to head outside

Remy’s confused as to why he’s heading outside but Logan says he likes to breathe the fresh air

When Remy questions why Logan needs to breathe the fresh air on the roof of his house Logan says he likes the height

Remy just shrugs it off and follows him because a) he’s not expecting a trap and b) Logan’s cute he wants to follow him alright

Logan, beautiful smart magnificent Logan, starts casually talking about the stars

He doesn’t know a lot about them, he notes, and then points at a random one and casually wonders out loud about what it’s named

Remy has an answer suspiciously quickly (normally he’d be more reserved but, and I will continue to say this, Logan a Cutie. he wants to impress him)

Logan slowly lures him deeper into the trap by starting with praise (’I didn’t know that. thank you for telling me.’) and follow-up questions (’what’s that one next to it?’ ‘is it a part of any major constellations?’)Remy slowly but surely gets more into it, short one-word explanations morphing into descriptions that morph into histories and exact chemical compositions (or at least what they’re believed to be) and ages and more

At some point he took his sunglasses off to see better and Logan could not be more in love

His eyes are literally sparkling, and now that Logan can see his eyes he sees they’re coffee brown with golden specks like the stars are literally in his eyes, which is a rather romantic comparison coming from Logan, but he’s pretty sure it’s just the truth

Remy’s never been as alive as he is in that moment, and Logan wants the moment to never end, to watch Remy continue to point and gesture and explain, jumping between history and mythology and science, and Logan’s suddenly unsure why he ever questioned Remy’s ability to do so well in school- he’s just always been hiding his reasons for knowing so much

Exactly like Logan did, he glances over for a moment, and Logan was ready to faint at the utter joy on his face, and ready to cry at how quickly it died as Remy shut his mouth like a steel trap

His apology is brief, just a tough ‘sorry’ followed by a ‘we should probably get back to studying...’He tries to leave and Logan grabs his arm before he can, getting him a confused stare that’s both hopeful and pained

Logan askes why he stopped

Remy says something about boring Logan/getting in the way of study time/other miscellaneous bs

And Logan just goes ‘I don’t think you could ever bore me. Especially not with such an interesting topic. And one you enjoy so thoroughly’

Remy’s highkey ‘excuse me lies are mean’

‘good thing I’m not lying then’

Remy: :O

Remy’s further attempts to avoid the issue eventually lead to Logan just stating the obvious of ‘you listened to me infodump about the ocean why can’t I listen to you infodump about the universe’

‘this is different’

‘I find that doubtful’

‘the ocean is really interesting, who wouldn’t want to listen to a rant about it- and hey you looked so cute and happy to, I mean it would be criminal not to listen-’

‘the universe is just as interesting as the oceans, arguably more so. and the way you phrase that, as if you are not just as cute and happy- unarguably more so- is quite misleading’

Remy’s been minorly murdered by both genuine interest in his interest and also that compliment

He finally mutters something about starboy (’but I’m just starboy...’)

Logan’s Confusion and when Remy mumbles how that’s what all the middle school classmates called him he’s minorly (read: MAJORLY) furious

Like yeah he went through the same thing but doing this to Remy ??? illegal

He says so

Remy scoffs

Logan says so again, but with more feeling

Remy scoffs again but with less feeling. He mentions, offhandedly, that is wasn’t really that bad of a nickname- it was the venom everyone had in their tone when they said it that made it awful

Logan Sees An Opening And Makes His Move

He scoots closer to Remy and gently cups his face and turns him to look at him, and softly, so softly, a whisper in the night, lost as quickly as a speck of sand from the top to the bottom of the hourglass in the light wind, he says,

‘then let’s lose the venom’ quietly quietly ‘and you can be my starboy’ a promise, a lovely promise, lovelier than any promise Remy has heard before, so sincere, so perfect, and sworn beneath a starry sky of cloudless night, where every star will hold that promise and watch it too completion, galaxies swirling in beautiful normality as they inch closer and closer like stars too close and spiraling towards each other until they meet, and instead of the vast darkness of a black hole forming something so bright it would sear your eyes right out of your face explodes into existence instead

A lovely night to fall in love and be loved for all of you, even the bits the world tried to force you to hide

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 Ep7: Mai Gets a Day Job (Killing People For Sport)

So, I looked at the calendar and realized, if  I don’t get this post up this week then you’ll only have one update from me for the whole of November since I’m leaving for over a week again. :/ So I’m just gonna get right to the good stuff because it has taken just a crazy amount of time to get to episode 7.  How great would it be if I also got to episode 8. Real great, right?

So lets do this, I can do this, I can write a recap without getting insanely distracted, watch me do it: This episode starts with Tristan sticking to the fatal flaw of his character sheet and seeing listed at the very top “low key toilet obsession.”

Ah Tristan.

And when you think “well, OK, they’re stuck by some historic Mesas, this is fine,” suddenly they are beset by the world’s most random biker gang of like 20 full grown adults/biker assassins.

And it’s not super clear if their driver died out there in the Arizona desert, or if he just put on a different outfit and joined this gang, but it won’t matter because like...it’s a filler arc in Yugioh so there’s gonna be some deaths.

This season seems to change genre like every 10 minutes, and so for right now we are in a Mad Max post-apocalyptic territory and PS every one of these bikers uses a lead pipe?

I feel like this is way more violent than a gun???

(read more under the cut)

And so, out the horizon comes another biker, like a masked cowboy on horseback, except she shoots these things instead of bullets.

These are trained assassins, by the way, just completely incapacitated by paper.

I just love the marketing team working alongside of this show that’s like “and what else can Yugioh cards do? destroy biker gangs. That’s right, one single card will absolutely destroy a biker!” and the writing staff was like “yeah, we can work that in. That totally works in universe, you don't even know.”

It’s Mai! Back from murdering the hell out of Pegasus, I guess she decided to ninja these 20 bikers, and did it so devastatingly, that they somehow blew up a motorcycle next to a live fuel tank? Like we’re talking Oliver Queen precision throwing here and like...

...Mai’s only been gone like a year right???

And so, seeing that this card is a harpy, which I dunno...doesn’t seem like it’s all that rare in comparison to a Blue Eyes or a God Card or I dunno any of the other signature cards we’ve heard about, Joey immediately recognizes Mai. Despite the fact that everything she is doing right now is completely out of character, and despite the fact that they are in freakin California.

RIP to all 20 of the people in that gang of bikers, because no one followed this limo away from the scene--everyone was, I assume, hella dead.

Youknow, I never expected Mai to kill more people than Bakura. I would have predicted Joey before Mai. I would have predicted Rebecca before Mai. Literally anyone else on this show before Mai.

Seto, crawling out of this oversized castle that I guess...is back on the real estate market now...decides that the irresistible pull of dragons printed on paper cards is stronger than listening to his brother’s needs to put down the damn cards and make a contractually obligated theme park.

I mean Mokuba kept him off the cards for nearly a whole year. What a healthy year that was for Seto.

Back in Arizona, apparently they didn’t make it more than a mile before Tristan busted the car. Not really clear why or how this happened, but they’ve decided to argue with eachother about it despite the fact one of them is clearly magical and does not really need to eat or drink or even maybe sleep?

Like we’ve seen Bakura basically survive off of one plate of tacos and 2 pints of blood, so just make Pharaoh push the car all the way back to California. Or just make Pharaoh use his millennium AIM to call up His tomb keepers and be like “Marik, we need a lift.” or maybe summon a very real monster because that’s a thing now?

Course this would rely on Pharaoh remembering that he has superpowers, which, somehow after 4 seasons, he always forgets how to use the moment he uses them. It’s like reverse Sailor Moon--Usagi tends to level up her Super powers, Pharaoh kind of tosses them out of the window and goes “oops” and becomes more and more mortal every single season.

So instead of magic they will just use Tea.

Amazing how none of them are really willing to date Tea seriously but they will acknowledge, out of the four of them, Tea is the best looking. So their strategy, bear with me, wasn’t to use the fact they’re children to get help from adults driving by, instead, the boys hid behind a rock so they could really make sure they were getting a hella pervy truck driver that would only stop for a single teenage girl stuck in the desert.

Only this group of kids would be like “Hey lets make sure the guy who picks us up is statistically most likely to be a serial killer” and then, weirdly enough, this horndog pedo truck driver ended up being the only person who didn’t try to kill them this entire episode.

So, lets go back to SF but coming from the north side...which makes no sense...but then again, they put Mesas in Napa County.

So last episode I assumed Rex and Weevil were dropped off in Oakland, but Rex informs us this episode that they are in “the worst part of town”

Where they get robbed twice, only to be saved by Duke Devlin, who I guess just lives here now because maybe it’s the only place he can afford in this expensive as hell city? Maybe he isn’t bothered by the crime-rate after that week he spent on Kaiba’s blimp/Seaquest mmo adventure?

Anyway, for some reason Duke--who is a game shop owner/developer by day--is wandering around the Tenderloin as a vigilante and saving people by throwing dice at them as some sort of side hustle and this is never discussed at all.

I would watch that spinoff series. Religiously.

Fun fact, there is definitely sketchy and bad parts of the Tenderloin you will know not to go to (you can smell it actually), but like a third of it is part of the best shopping district in the city and we used to just shop there unsupervised when I was a kid. It has an Anthropologie.

Not saying the parts that are bad aren’t bad. Whenever I drive through the non-shopping parts, I see at least one super sketch thing making me thankful I’m in the car. But I just don't know how Rex and Weevil managed to get robbed twice in one day. Just go five blocks in literally any direction.

Bro and I were like...HOW did this shot happened from this angle on the freeway...and then I only just now realized it. Something I forgot about because it’s from my parent’s generation...maybe the animators weren’t aware that the Embarcadero fell down after Loma Prieta?

So this was the SF landscape before the quake of 89′ (Which I have no memory of since I was a baby when this happened)

and after 89.

Like maybe the animators they had on this team remembered an SF from their youth that had a huge iconic raised street wrapping all the way around one part of it and just...never got the memo that an Earthquake made the entire thing fall down?

Either way, Duke is either driving these two directly out of SF, or he is driving them into 1988 and is taking a lovely drive on the Old Embarcadero, an experience which does not exist anymore, and which makes a lot more sense since Duke has to be somewhat near downtown, going by the skyscrapers and the vicinity to the Tenderloin.

Man. In the Yugioh Universe, Loma Preita just never actually happened. How is that factoid alone not the weirdest part of this episode?

(I am so glad Serenity is not here now that Duke’s back)

Welcome back to the show Duke, glad you’re bringing...Rex and Weevil...

To be fair, Duke has absolutely no idea who is and isn’t Yugi’s friends. Duke just kind of shows up and pretends like he’s part of the gang, and the gang has lost so much brain matter from all the cards and all the dark magic, they just assume he’s been here the whole time.

So at first I was like “this has to be a pun on Industrial Light and Magic” since there’s virtually no other film studios in the city--but ILM moved to SF 3-4 years after this season came out. So it’s just a weird coincidence, I guess. Or maybe it’s just a really uninspired name?

And so Mai, who I guess has been just waiting on this ledge for 8 hours decides to drop in.

Mai has evolved a lot since S1.

But, although Mai is just...straight up evil now, at least we get to see it taken out on Pegasus who, as far as this show is concerned, is a pretty evil bastard.

A pretty evil bastard who took like 3-4 episodes to beat in S1 but Mai could just do it off-screen.

It’s just funny that the entire time on the island Pegasus was probably pretty sure everyone there was trying to kill him EXCEPT for Mai and then the moment his back is turned he’s like “oh whaaaat?”

Like Bandit Keith is already in America. But rather than use Bandit Keith for this, lets use Mai to give Joey something to angst about. We can’t put her in a coma again--so lets instead get her vaguely possessed. Although seriously, if someone I liked did this to me I think I’d be over that crush really fast.

And then, speaking of Bandit Keith, we get to have a Greek Chorus this duel from the minibosses. Valon and the other guy with the handlebar-muttonchops.

I looked up “where does Valon’s accent come from” and literally there is no consensus, as far as I know.

And that’s where this episode ends.

Now I’m gonna go out of town for a week and then will need another week to make more of these so I’ll be on another hiatus. Holding out if I’ll maybe bring a laptop or something to where I’m going so I can type out recaps when I’m bored.

The problem is having the uhhhhh photoshop to do the caps. I can’t bear to do this in MS Paint because hell will freeze over before I lose all of my actions and hotkeys I made specifically to reduce the time it takes to make these. But we shall see.

anyway, if you want to see these from the beginning, click here.

[girlbookwrm]

AVENGERS: CIVIL WAR

THE MIGHTY PRE ENDGAME REWATCH

it took us two entire days to watch this, back in whenever we were watching this. I’ve got a Bundle of Papers here in front of me, and the CW Bundle is by far the thickest, and that’s with minimal salt content.

Speaking of Salt: The Roommate and I had to approach this as an Avengers movie. Because otherwise the salt levels in this would be toxic, possibly fatal. Even so, ppl with high cholesterol be warned

LET’S DO THIS

1991!

Winter Soldier: 

what is this

what is this please

dat beef tho

what is this op sec

honestly

NO mask

SHINY FUCKOFF ARM just HANGING OUT

CCTV???

~ooooooo he’s a ghooooooooooooost~

he’s got an extremely dedicated and very harried cleanup crew is what he’s got

OH! OLD LOGO ILU!!!

LAGOS!!

The Roommate: That’s a lot of sugar

i ain’t judging

what, you think her powers run on optimism?

is there an accent? is there not? Shroedinger’s accent.

droney the drone

sam’s lil sky roomba

i love him

guhhhh this scene every line shows character and growth and i just *clenches fist*

did

did falcon just throw steve

just yeeted him at the enemy?

god i love that

also: has steve bulked up since TWS?

that’s also on Sam, yeah?

CUT THE CHEEEEECCCCK

is this fucking NEUROTOXIN? STEVE WHERE’S UR MASK?

Steve, throwing himself into a room full of an unknown poison gas without a mask: I bet i can survive this

Bucky, in Bucharest: *breaks whatever he’s holding without knowing why*

god i love sam

“I don’t work like that no more” Means ?????????????

PARKOUR NAT

is also BRUNCH MOM NAT

“both grunting” is always one of my favorite subtitles

2 white boys fighting in the middle of the street like it’s a video game

god someone took the murder strut to heart wow that is some. that is some something that’s for sure.

give me even one (1) heterosexual explanation for "your pal your buddy your bucky"

there’s no way that bucky ever said this, right? this is just Rumlow fucking with steve, and the screenwriters fucking with us

because IN CASE YOU WERE NOT IN THIS FANDOM IN 2016, WE ALL THOUGHT CAP WOULD DIE IN THIS MOVIE

WE WERE SO SURE

wow i wonder if that will be relevant to anyone’s emotions here in the year of our lordt 2019

anyway, what bucky actually said was:

“please tell rogers... that he’s a big dumb dildo and he should wear a gas mask and also a parachute.”

listen i love this opening scene but also wanda is not at all responsible for this explosion and the fact that they act like she is undermines my ability to suspend my disbelief.

DIGITAL ENYOUTHENMENT ALERT

also, tony the fact that you are using your literal dead mom as an actual therapist is

wow

BARF feels right to me

too real, tony

it’s too real

how ARE you getting around the strings and taxes tho

Also can i say that i actually love that Pepper’s absence is this profoundly important to the story. The hole where pepper should be is a huge part of this story and i like that. i like that a lot.

WOW THAT EXTRA IS LIKE A MASHUP OF NAT AND WANDA. SHE IS THE GENERIC MARVEL WHITE LADY

more a+ visual storytelling with the elevator

I’m just so mad that they blame wanda and play that straight?

all they had to do was outright acknowledge one (1) time that the media is picking on her because she’s a woman/a foreigner

imagine that speech coming from nat instead of steve

though i do love Steve’s pep talk

again. give me one (1) heterosexual explanation

though why not have Steve say “they’re just bullies, you did the right thing” and hearken back to smolsteeb

The Roommate: Remember how i was mad at his Oscars Velvet Blazer? I am also mad at this sweater.... it looks... so soft... i don’t know if i want it on him or off him... just wanna tuch....... and wear..........?”

Vision’s Ascot is. Something else man.

The Roommate: Why is ross secretary of state?

Me: Why is Trump President

Me: I bet Ross is vegan

the roommate, who has vegan-related trauma: UUUUGGGHHHHHHHH

Nat's reaction to vigilantes: Bitch please. she is Unbothered.

you don’t have to show us footage we’ve got the ptsd nightmares

400 pages in 3 days

[tired american sighing]

we honestly can’t even criticize this plot point anymore just

[my longest and most american sigh]

CLEVELAND!!!

hail hydra continues to be the Most Terrible last words

but WHY does ross have the congressional medal of honor

do you know how HARD it is to get one of those????

yeesh

sassy black friends sassing at each other

is definitely a

thing that is happening rn

Vision: Well Actually

no one cares, vis

ok like

a kid is dead but

3.6 is an okay GPA

maybe all my friends are overachievers

maybe it’s just because most of them are women but like

it’s an okay GPA

i’d have 8000% more respect for Tony if he was more upfront like “look this is on me” especially here

are we supposed to be picking all this up as subtext, actually?

because i know that this movie ALSO had a Troubled Youth ala ant man

and i really do appreciate the Russos for relying on a smart audience but there’s a lot going on

and it’s very obvious to me that they had to shift gears 18,000 times in the script writing phase

so like, you’ve got old man vet steve

but it’s painfully obvious that he missed vietnam right?

like

it’s painfully obvious

and he’s v egotistical and self righteous too 

it IS a battle of the egos

and no one is right

except natasha

Steve: i have to go

me: mood

LONDON!!!!

oh god

oh god no

steve god no steve oh god

gfhskfdjjjksjdjjhrrrrhrhhrhfhh [wailing and rending of garments]

Re Peggy’s age:

SURPRISE IT’S ACTUALLY PLAUSIBLE

so the True Hallmark of a Cap Movie is Peggy telling steve what to do.

so weird to have that in an avengers movie

i do love this. GOOD BRO NAT CONTENT

Um. is vision a minor? is wanda?

again, nat is the only Correct one here

stay together guys

it might be

reeeeeeaaaaally important in 

*checks watch*

two years’ time.

~hug~

VIENNA!!!!!

CHAD WICK! CHAD! WICK! CHAD! WICK!

god i love the xhosa in this

There is a level of worldbuilding in this that we p much only get from the russos/markus&mcfeely. i mean -- internal consistency worldbuilding? if that makes sense? we get a lot of visual worldbuilding in black panther, but this is distinctly different and hard to articulate and it has to do with the way they approach things and how they assume audience intelligence

it just works for me

oh no chadwick boseman don’t be cry

Sharon deserves better

than being cockblocked by her own aunt

and also sam wilson (who also deserves better)

cryptid!bucky

Nat did you get that suit from jenny agutter?

LA Brunch Mom Nat

mah girl

she’s just so tired

steve (bless him) is just so exhausting

couples date sam and steve dressed to match

“at the gym”??? really? the arm is... a bit of a giveaway

i do feel bad for zemo in this one specific case

russian IS hard

how. did he get that in there?

Soft Plumboy Bucky

BEEF

Captain’s Log: Buck’s place is a shithole

Sergeant’s Log: Steve’s face is pretty

surprise bitch

“That’s Smart, Good Strategy” is an excellent phrase to use in everyday conversation in order to weed out who Knows and who Doesn’t.

What i have learned from civil war: 

Captain America is a projectile weapon

further query:

did bucky ever hurl small steve at assailants?

Bucky: *punts steve down an alley*

Steve, 90 lbs of rage at 90 mph: GET WRECKED

Bucky’s got big tommy wiseau cryptid energy here

And now there’s a cat

bucky:

I love this vampire running and also bucky’s thighs

Steve Rogers: Excuse me sir I need to commandeer this vehicle. YEET.

Bucky Barnes: Excuse me sir I need to commandeer this vehicle. YOINK.

Bucky and Steve: Wrecking your morning commute since 2014

WAR MACHINE!!!

god vis has the biggest dorkiest crush

so vis are you a child prodigy? or? what?

The Roommate, a cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure: vis have you eaten anything between CW and IW?

Me, sinnamon roll, not to be trusted: *dying* *thinking about how Vision’s got schroedinger’s dick. does it exist? does it not exist? who knows.*

Me: Y. Yes. I th. think he has. eaten something. between now and. and IW. something.

The Roommate: *betrayed look*

Me: DEEP FRIED KEBAB MAYBE? I DON’T KNOW.

The Roommate: *is so disappointed*

BERLIN!!!!!!

Bucky is. So tired. Let him rest.

fucking up the morning commute again i see

u like cats??

I love the ratio of overkill:ineffectiveness with this glass box they put him in.

why did tony  bring these fancy pens

the time spent explaining them could’ve been spent doing literally anything else

*i still don’t understand the accords*

GOD STEVE WANTS TO BE AN UNCLE SO BAD

“my fault”

there it is

“truth is i don’t want to stop”

THERE it is

“i thought the accords could split the difference”

THERE IT IS

"no, i don’t.”

THERE IT IS

“IT’S INTERNMENT.”

THERE! IT! IS!

gah.

wanda’s accent et al -- MAKE IT EXPLICIT MARVEL YOU COWARDS

no but really what are the accords

here followed a 20-30 minute convo about the accords

basically the summing up was:

Nat is 100% Right Ross is 100% Wrong Everyone Else is In A Grey Area

look this is actually a really good avengers movie

but

this is a moment when the back catalogue works against them because this conversation is so -- it implies a lot of friendly interactions between these two. they seem to have a relationship

but i keep looking at all the other movies they’ve interacted in like

BITCH WHERE? WHERE IS THE TONYSTEVE FRIENDSHIP? WHERE???

i am anticipating this will cause me A Grief later

The Roommate, looking at Steve in his Grey Shirt and Jacket: Damn, sir. Stop wearing clothes.

“BIRD COSTUME???”

“j a m e s”

big holt talking to rosa vibes there

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

A VAST AND MIGHTY MOOD

Zemo’s plan is so ridiculous i genuinely don’t have time to get into it i still have two pages of notes to get through holy shit.

this fight scene. does things. for me.

hhhHNNNNHGH BEEFSTEAK

(oh tony left with no suit? growth dot gif)

THIGHS

T H I G H S ! ! ! !

CHADWICK!

Sam out here, serving looks, casually modeling

B I C E P S ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

TOO SEXY! *crashes helicopter*

I need twelve more scenes of steve and bucky faffing about in the water.

A more effective restraint than the custom made bucky bottle

(BRIEF 1991)

haaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAa biceps u stop that

Is Tony having a heart attack???

he has no concept of how to treat children because he never was one oh no i gave myself a sad feeling

QUEENS!!!!!!!

“I’m having a big fight in a parking lot with my superhero friends better go pick up a child as backup.” - tony stark

tony he doesn’t have a passport and if he understood what was happening he would not be on your side

Now That’s What I Call Vigilantism.

Why are you bringing a CHILD to a gun fight

Tony’s face, to me, suggests that he knows EXACTLY what he’s doing

also? it’s painfully obvious to me that these scenes were copypasted in late stage when they finally found out that yes they would have the rights to spiderman lol

for some reason they don’t feel the need to tell is that this is avengers compound in 400 point font

i’m so lost

where are we?

without the 400 point font i can only assume we are on mars

THAT’s a fine way to greet YOUR FATHER, WANDA

hawkeye is in fact the team lynchpin

is it

ugh

is it because they listen to him but he listens to natasha

ugh

i bet it is

UUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH

Vision: I have been FALLING! for THIRTY MINUTES!

“i know someone who does”

i’m confused by the cut here, because it seems to imply that Sharon, deliberately or inadvertently, rats them out to natasha?

Birds and raccoons do not get along

steve

steve no

steve

ur timing is shit steve

Scott Lang might be the best thing in this movie

well except for Dat Bone Structure

CUT THE CHEEEEEECK

*costume change in a parking lot to the yakkety sax soundtrack*

Thinking about the coming battle i am forced to concede that Iron Man Has A Point?

“do you really want to punch your way out of this?”

Steve: I ALWAYS wanna punch my way out

god scott’s such a fukkin nerd

tiny quibble but Scott “got punched by hope van dyne” lang would never say that to the black heckin widow

“gimmick”

um

people in falcon houses shouldn’t throw spider stones, samuel

wanda

those cars belong to people

oh god iron man has a point

LET’S GO LESBIANS! COME ON LESBIANS LET’S GO

*catfight sounds*

“then why did you run?”

dude you attacked me in a catsuit

Tony’s true superpower is that he knows steve, that’s how spiderbabby gets the upper hand

althought god

Tony was pre-gaslighting peter

he was pilotlighting peter

*my longest UGH yet*

“Queens?” “Brooklyn”

MAXIMUM NEW YORK ACHIEVED

ant man is the MVP

hmmmmmm “we don’t trade lives” HMMMMMMMMM

why did that truck explode

also *omg iron man has a point*

tony tedward stark how did you not know how old this child was

also peter stop pretending you don’t know what Empire Strikes Back, AT-ATs and Hoth are.

why doesn’t Vis get more flack for this

hey. hey tony. you know what sam is? A MEDIC. maybe let him LOOK AT YER FRIEND THERE instead of SHOOTING HIM IN THE FACE.

zemo’s plan is noooooonseeeeennnnnnsssse

guh these two beautiful men emoting in different directions KILL ME

this doctor is just like “yup there’s a giant purple robot here seems legit”

natasha is the only one who’s 100% right

did... did the russos kill themselves in this movie? did they cast themselves as dead extras? was this a statement of some kind?

HOW did ross get the congressional medal of honor. H O W.

“you read it”

NO ONE READ IT, IT’S 400 PAGES

tony this is Some Nonsense

ffflslkds he’s taking one of Nat’s guns KILL ME

one (1) heterosexual explanation.

rode back in a freezer truck

got pneumonia

already had pneumonia

and you blew three whole dollars on some slut

(seriously. gimme one. i’m waiting.)

srsly tho, whether you ship it or not, these two are old marrieds

the red star looks weird on his beefcake arm. did they forget to scale it up?

KITTY

listen zemo is just really turned on by cam and he didn’t mean to say that and that’s the most relateable thing he’s done so far.

It’s not just that bucky killed his mom. it’s that bucky killed his mom AND STEVE KEPT IT FROM HIM.

life alert a senior citizen has fallen

T'Challa, observing this White Nonsense™: I truly should... check myself. Before! I wreck myself.

agism is what it is

god this bit

steve dropping the shield

look at him

he is Stick A Fork In Him D O N E

Rhodey really deserves better than this? He deserves development showing the evolution of his opinion between here and IW

i wish we could get more of him grappling with this

that said

gosh wouldn’t it fucking suck if Cap and Bucky got relegated to End Credit scenes in their own got damn movie to make room for Iron Man to emote at his buddy his pal his rhodey?

*looks directly into the camera like i’m on the office.*

Anyway.

Steve rogers: getting the last word in every argument since 1918.

“from the bottom of my heart: My Bad.”

[shananaomi]

2017.

Giving myself an hour on the clock to get through this, if at all possible. (ETA: Done!) 

Here’s 2016.

What did you do in 2017 that you'd never done before?

I have such a great answer to this that I’m still not ready to write about. Ask me in person and I might tell you. Also: went to yoga fairly regularly and found I both could and wanted to lay peacefully in one pose or another for 5 or 10 minutes at a time.

Did you keep your New Years' resolutions and will you make more for next year?

We did in fact #GetFitToFightFascism, or anyway on days when I didn’t know how else to treat the creeping anxiety I got up and hiked to the Observatory or somewhere else so ridiculously stunning that I felt slightly reassured we’d live another day. We were determined to see our BFF Jamie every Saturday night and except for weekends when one of us or the other was out of town or we had plans already for the weekend we had a near-perfect attendance record. And though I didn’t think I wrote that much, I got enough out in TinyLetter (now backposted at Medium) to add up to a decent Twitter thread last week. 

I always feel like next year should maybe be its own post, but for now I’m thinking about: Writing, always. Reading more. And finding a way to host maybe monthly dinners for small groups of our friends at home.

Did anyone close to you give birth?

My childhood best friend’s daughter was born on New Year’s Day 2017 and we finally got to meet her last week. She is able to reach for and drink from a glass of beer so I think she’ll be just fine.

What countries did you visit?

This was a year between big adventures out of the country, but we just booked a February getaway to Puerto Vallarta to celebrate the 10th anniversary of our first date. Went back and forth to New York a few times, plus a quickie up to SF for work.

What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017?

Confidence the pendulum will in fact swing back from fascism.

What date from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

I guess the run from January 19 (Hamilton) to January 20 (bus trip from NYC to DC, with the worst possible welcome from post-Inaugural attendees) to January 21 (meeting up with so many old friends at the Women’s March). The rest is still vividly sharp but not so much tied to any specific date.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Surviving it with some semblance of hope. Making the move to a better, bigger place in Pasadena. Leading a loyal and devoted staff through a major corporate transition and many other hard challenges.

What was your biggest failure?

I have never done anything as hard as being a boss lady, and I’m still not sure most days I’ve left things at least better than I found them.

Did you suffer illness or injury?

For the first 9 months or so I got super sick every single goddamned month: a recurring case of America, I called it.  Overall I’ve been very lucky.

What was the best thing you bought?

The peace of mind that privilege allows when you need to pay your way out of a loud, anxiety-ridden neighborhood for the quieter (at least most days) and more serene outskirts of town. A weekly outlet and focus for my physical stress in the form of the most amazing personal trainer. A 40th birthday blowout weekend that included renting the most ridiculous house (as seen when CJ fell into the pool in The West Wing), hosting a dinner party and then pool party for so many of our friends and family.

Whose behavior merited celebration?

My wife’s, always. Because all I do these days is listen to Kesha, I’ve been thinking about these lines:

I know forever don’t exist But after this life, I’ll find you in the next So when I say “forever,” it’s the goddamned truth

Where did most of your money go?

The house and moving into it, the car, the trainer, the birthday celebrations.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Did I?

We discovered Two Bunch Palms, an old getaway near Palm Springs that soothed my soul in quiet calm ways I hadn’t realized could be so close at hand or that I needed so much. This year’s LA Pride parade became a protest and was the most joyous and community-filled day like that we’ve felt in a long, long time.

What song will always remind you of 2017?

This fairly goes to Kesha’s “Praying,” but since I already wrote a whole thing about that, I’ll say Julia Michaels’ “Don’t Wanna Think,” in part because I listened to it on repeat for so many hours in a row while flying back and forth from New York that it’s kind of embedded in my subconscious: I’m not really one for drinking songs, but — fuck it, here it comes. Heartbreak is annoying, and I’ll feel it in the morning. Swallow it down like a bitter pill. At least it will taste better than this feeling will. I don’t like myself when I’m just standing still.

Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder? Happier, though I’d say that’s grading on a goddamned curve for real.

ii. thinner or fatter? About the same, if trimmer and stronger in some places.

iii. richer or poorer? Close to a draw here, more or less.

What do you wish you'd done more of?

I was happiest when I was hiking, reading, sitting quietly on the couch with my wife and dog. I did a decent amount of all that but it was still to keep my head above water.

What do you wish you'd done less of?

Be on the goddamned internet. But I’m also aware that finding the right balance between awareness and mindfulness and rest and action is the most pervasive and elusive self-care challenge for literally everyone I know, so I’m trying hard not to give myself a hard time about it. And there’s probably something here to say about the betrayal and pain that came from incorrectly trusting people to be their best selves instead of being undeserving of the benefit of the doubt but I am working so fucking hard at leaving that behind in 2017.

How did you spend Christmas?

In Reno with my family and friends, bouncing between two houses full of other people’s people (and mine) and a lot of very rich and exotic meats and liquors. The last couple years have been really hard and not well-balanced or rejuvenating visits, and this year was much better if still not without its own drama.

What was your favorite TV program?

New: Star Trek: Discovery was almost everything I needed in a show this year. Also I loved The Arrangement and found it way smarter and more complicated and fucked up than I’d expected.

New to me: I was only a little late on Riverdale but found it very enjoyable.

Oldies but Goodies: Also I watched a lot of older Star Trek, from TOS to the early movies. Everyone keeps saying next week need to do DS9, so I guess that’s the kind of geek I am proudly now.

What friends did you make or meet this year for the first time?

All but one were not new but I really loved our all-girl get-togethers to watch hockey even when we barely paid attention to it.

What was the best book you read?

I didn’t make a real resolution about reading more but boy did I. It’s just so much better than being in the world or on the internet. The ones that really stand out are Queen of the Night by Alexander Chee (not from this year, but my fave read from it), John Green’s Turtles All the Way Down, and Amy Bloom’s White Houses, which comes out in a couple months. If we’re not already GoodReads friends come find me there—I’m terrible at writing reviews but I find it super helpful personally to know what y’all have read and liked?

What did you want and get?

A new house.

What did you want and not get?

A Japanese wooden soaking tub of my very own. (See below.)

What was your favorite film of this year?

We just saw Call Me By Your Name last night and now I can’t think of anything else. Though I’d say the sheer joy of Wonder Woman is still a solid contender.

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I was 40, and I took 5 days to basically do only what I wanted, and it did the exact trick I’d hoped for: I just enjoyed it instead of ruthlessly evaluating what I haven’t done with my life.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? What political issue stirred you the most? Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I am going to charitably say the answer to all three of these is both obvious and tiresome. Be better, 2018.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017?

Lots of jumpsuits and DVF, all courtesy a Rent the Runway Unlimited subscription, which also falls under where all my money went but was a ton of fun and practical in many ways too.

What kept you sane?

Remembering how many amazing women are already in my life and know exactly what I mean even when I can barely say it out loud.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Ugh, this one feels too much like work and also like tempting fate.

Who did you miss?

For the first time in a while there were frankly some people who I miss greatly but was glad didn’t have to live through this shit themselves.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017.

Just because it could have been worse doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be better.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Here’s what I wrote about 3 songs that shaped my 2017. I don’t think I can do much better in one quote.

What’s one photo that sums up your year?

[writingwithadinosaur]

“Dietary Restriction” - Oneshot

“Dietary Restriction” - Oneshot

My Masterlist - Here

Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 1,800-ish

Key: Y/N = Your Name, L/N = Your Last Name, H/C = Your Hair Color, E/C = Your Eye Color

Warnings: This story is not what you think based off of the summary. Just trust me. Please let me know if I messed up and need to put any warnings!

Summary: The team is at one of Tony’s parties. Natasha and Steve notice that one of their friends hasn’t been eating a lot lately. Steve decides to speak up about it.

Author’s Note: My first Steve Rodgers piece! I had this idea in my head and then thought “Which character would fit in this story?” and Stevie was the first one and the only one that really made sense for me.

Also, I apologize to everyone who has requested prompts to me. Things have been more difficult than I thought recently and caused me to have a delay in all of my writing.

If you would like to be tagged in any of my future pieces (All Works, Specific Fandoms, or Specific Multi-Parts), please let me know! And as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

<3

- DreaSaurusREX

Tonight was another one of Tony’s well known parties. The good thing about this one was that it was more formal. So there wasn’t insanely loud music, booze everywhere, or an overwhelming atmosphere. You had on a classy dress that accented everything you liked about yourself, even if you were nervous about looking good in front of people. You were never really used to formal events, but you tried. And once you got a drink in your hand, you got a bit more comfortable.

About an hour or so into the party, you were standing with a few members or the team, talking about some prank war that was going on between Tony and Sam. You were comfortably standing next to Steve. He was your best friend who had been there through everything. And while he may not know everything about you, he was damn close to you. In fact, you two were so close that you had often thought about the possibility of you two becoming an item. While you would love to live out your dreams, you were sure he didn’t feel that way. He’s fricken Captain America. He can have literally any girl that would be perfect for him. So you shoved those thoughts to the back of your mind and kept your best friend as close as possible.

Finding a good time in the conversation to step away, you excused yourself.

“I’ll be back. Gonna get another drink. Anyone want anything?” You look around and get various forms of ‘No’ before your turn and head to the bar. Natasha moves to take your place next to Steve. Nudging his shoulder, the two of them start their own conversation.

“Hey, is everything alright with (Y/N)?” Natasha asked. She knew Steve would know if something was wrong with you.

“No. Not that I know of. Why do you ask?” Steve slowly started to get worried. He really cared about you. And if something was wrong, he needed to try to help take care of it and you.

“I haven’t seen her eat too much. I know she went to see Bruce about something, and she hasn’t been eating normally since. And not in a good way in my opinion.”

“She saw Bruce a month or so ago. Nothing seemed to be wrong after she met with him. But now that you mention it, she hasn’t eaten much tonight either. All I’ve seen her eat is a little bit of fruit and veggies.” Natasha grabbed Steve’s arm and looked at you at the bar, waiting for your drink.

“Steve, you need to go talk to her. I don’t want this to escalate into anything bigger and scarier.” Without even thinking twice, Steve nodded and headed to you. He tried his best to look normal, but you could tell that not everything was alright. He came up next to you and ordered a beer before turning his attention completely to you.

“Well hey there, Soldier. I said I would be back. I just need some water.” And, as if on cue, the bartender placed your water and Steve’s beer on the counter. You started to walk away, but Steve grabbed your hand. You felt a blush creep on your cheeks at the sudden contact.

“Hang on a sec. Please.” You looked at him and saw more and more worry slowly creep into his features. He went from his stereotypical Captain America smile, to a concerned man that you couldn’t help but fall in love with.

“Okay…? What’s up, Steve? You look like I’m going to go jump off the roof or something.” You attempted to joke and lighten the mood, but Steve remained serious. His hands now holding both of yours. You liked the feel of your hands in his.

“I am just going to come right out and say what I need to say. Natasha and I have noticed that you haven’t been your usual self. I remember you going to see Dr.Banner a month ago, but you never really told me what was going on or what happened. And now, you aren’t eating how you normally do. Tonight, for example. Tony has this whole buffet style situation and all you’ve had is fruit and vegetables.”

He paused for a second to take a breath. He didn’t realize how worried he was until he was actually talking to you about something that could seriously injure you. If something happened to you, he wouldn’t know what to do with himself. He had a thought: I have to tell her how I feel. He shifted his hands so he really had a comfortable and strong hold of yours, giving off a very protective vibe.

“I care about you a lot, (Y/N). More than just friends normally do.” His eyes fell to your hands. “You could even say that I really love you.” He looked back up and saw a smile across your face. “And I don’t like not seeing you eat or you not eating normally.”

You didn’t understand why that was such a big deal to him right now. But then he continued, and it clicked in your head.

“I’m scared that you are messing up your health by not eating as much as you used to. Now, I know that I am from a totally different time, but Nat told me about what girls do these days to feel better about their bodies and I think that is--”

You reached a hand to his upper arm and tried not to laugh too much. He really was too good to be true. But he was worried about nothing. You had to fill him in now. 

Once you got to the end of your laugh, you looked at his face. He looked like such a confused puppy.

“Oh my gosh. Steve, I am not starving myself. Yes, I’m not 100% happy with my body, but I’m not stopping myself from eating because of it.”

“Well then, why aren’t you eating like normal?” He was really confused now.

“I went to Bruce because I was having really bad stomach pains. It felt like knives were in my stomach and I was being stabbed from the inside out. There were days where it hurt to stand up or sit up straight. He ran some tests and we found out that I am severely lactose intolerant. So I have to restrict my diet. I can’t have anything that has butter, milk, cheese, yogurt, sour cream, et cetera.”

You see Steve instantly relax. He was so thankful it wasn’t anything really bad. You weren’t eating a lot at the party because almost everything had some sort of dairy in it.

“Why didn’t you tell me about meeting with Bruce and everything? I could have tried to help make sure there would be food you could have more often around the tower.”

“I haven’t told many people because it hasn’t become a problem or a topic of conversation yet. I didn’t think it would be something that cause you to worry like this. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Stevie.” He sighed and looked at his hands before smiling at you. He really loved when you called him by his nickname. It sounded good coming from you.

“I’m just glad you’re okay. I would hate to see you do anything like that to yourself. You’re already beautiful in my eyes, doll.” He stood up to head back to the group.

He leaned down and kissed your head like how he had countless times before, but this time you were blushing like mad. You don’t know what went through you, but you had to tell him about how you felt. It could make your friendship awkward, but you had to take that chance. Before Steve could walk away too far, you reached out and grabbed his arm.

“There is something else I haven’t told you about.” Steve’s eyes instantly scanned your face and went back to being scared. “Don’t worry, Stevie. It’s nothing bad.” He relaxed once again. You took a breath before continuing.

“I really care about you too. You could even say that I love you too.”

You were going to just leave him with that and head back to the group since you had been away for longer than expected. But before you could take a few steps away, Steve made you turn around and come back to him. As soon he turned you around, his arm snaked around your waist and his lips landed on yours in a soft and simple kiss. Your hand fell naturally to his chest as you smiled into the kiss that was so much better than you could imagine. You both pull away and kind of absorb what just happened. Thankfully no one around you made a big deal of it.

“Well damn, Cap. I thought you didn’t kiss until after the first date.” You joked, still in his arms. He smiled a genuine Steve Rogers smile.

“I guess I just had to make an exception for my best girl.” You smile back at him as he leans down for another quick kiss. “Alright. We have been away from them for awhile. I’m sure they are curious as to what just happened.”

“Yeah. I have a feeling they saw.” Steve sees you looking a bit past him. He turns and looks at your small group, all of them watching the two of you. Your blush grew more.

“I’m going to grab another plate of fruit before heading back to them. I’ll meet you back over there.”

“Don’t be too long, doll.” You kiss Steve’s cheek before heading to the buffet table. Steve grabs his beer and rejoins the group. They moved to the couches off to the side. As he sits down, he is welcomed back with various accepting hoots and sayings. After acknowledging everyone’s acceptance, he turned his attention to Natasha.

“Everything’s fine with (Y/N). Turns out that she is lactose intolerant and can’t really have a lot of the food here.” Natasha’s smile turns into a mischievous smirk.

“I know.” She says before taking a sip of her wine. This was now the second time Steve was confused tonight.

“What do you mean you know? Why didn’t you tell me before I went up to her?”

“She told me while we she was cooking dinner for herself one night. I just wanted to give you a push. It was sad how obvious your crushes on each other were. You two were too blind to see the other’s feelings. And it looks like my plan worked perfectly.” She tipped her drink to Steve before taking another sip. He just gave her a sort of playfully angry look before smiling back at her and sipping his beer.

Steve feels the seat next to him dip down a bit. Turning, he is met with your bright smile. You had a plate of mixed fruits and veggies in your lap. Offering the plate to Steve to share, he takes a couple of grapes while he casually wraps his arm around you. He kissed your cheek before going back to whatever conversation the group was having.

You honestly never thought your dream would come true. But here you are, with your very own super soldier.

Tags: @goodnightwife @marvelous-imagining @feelmyroarrrr @theeactress