#it's about the Duggars so be warned

[gxlden-angels]

Not to ride Bezos's dick, but Shiny Happy People is free on prime video rn with ads and it's got all the hits including commentary from Fundie Friday, an interview of Paul and Morgan that's currently making Paul meltdown, and a summary of the "Joshua" generation

It is about the Duggars, so please be careful when viewing due to the nature of the documentary. There will be discussions of things like child sexual abuse material, child abuse, cults, and fundamentalism

[timeisacephalopod]

I've seen, repeatedly, that every accusation is a confession from the political right and honestly nothing rings more true to that than the claim that university is liberal indoctrination and this is a problem for right wingers for reasons I can't identify when they have the Joshua Generation.

At least libs only indoctrinate adults who are paying thousands of dollars for it instead of literally breeding a billion kids they all homeschool and abuse the fuck out of with the hopes they'll all become Clarence Thomas and fuck America 18 different ways to Sunday. What an odd thing to even bitch about if they're ok with literally doing what they falsely accuse universities of except to literal children from birth to, if they had their way, death while also flailing around about "false accusations" like they aren't throwing them out as fast as they're having kids they force their other kids to raise while treating that abuse like a Funny Little Organization System. Kids are such blessings you know, that's why they don't even bother raising half of them and force their daughters to do all that work for them.

I'm actually surprised I don't see more people who left this lifestyle as adults who were raised into it speaking up about this stuff. There's more of it now, half these things were mentioned in the Shiney Happy People doc and I found out about the Joshua Generation from a podcast called Kitchen Table Cult that is hosted by 2 people who left similar beliefs to the Duggars but I'm honestly surprised it's not like. A huge thing in news everywhere but that's probably because this type of shit isn't even a blip on the map of all the fucked up things the political right does so often it's exhausting to keep up with let alone hold anyone accountable for. Too busy bitching that trans people shit and do so in public bathrooms sometimes. Priorities, you know. Think of the children, but not the ones being bred and abused to further their parents political ends.

[anewnewcrest]

What kind of lessons is Martha teaching those kids? Bankruptcy?! Is the Matthews family secretly full of financial criminals lol

This is - unfortunately - an absolutely Fundie-accurate easter egg. *takes deep breath* Rant incoming in 3, 2, 1...

The IBLP (Bill Gothard's cult that the Duggar and Bates families used to follow, and some still currently follow) used so-called Wisdom Booklets (Content Warning: EVERYTHING, and they specifically talk about sexual assault and abuse in the most horrendous fashion possible. I am not kidding here. Also, be prepared to lose a few IQ points) as their homeschooling materials. The way these booklets of making people actively dumber worked is that every child from kindergarden to high school graduate worked with the same booklet, and learned the same lesson as a family, with the mother providing differentiation (meaning she's responsible for breaking it up and supplementing the materials and teaching it in ways that a 5y/o and an 18y/o and everyone in between can get something out of it, which is something even teachers with actual fucking degrees and shit would struggle with in that situation, with those materials). A family was also supposed to work through all booklets in a year, and then just repeat every year, so if you spent your whole school career homeschooled, you'd repeat these booklets 13-ish times or so. This obviously did not work for a lot of reasons, and led to disastrous educational outcomes, not least because the booklets are also factually inaccurate (like, basic 7th grade math is just... plain wrong), horrific from a didactics standpoint, and read like a 12 y/o with a thesaurus was supposed to mock up an educational resource. They also indoctrinate children into the cult, by - for example - telling children that abuse is their fault and that they need to forgive their abuser, or that they're supposed to be willing to die for their faith, amongst other horrible things.

Enter the first Duggar TV Special, 14 Children and Pregnant Again from 2004. At 21:12, the Duggar homeschooling setup is shown, and they are using this Wisdom Booklet (#35) whose "Law" (basically, indoctrination into cult rules but make it seem biblical and universal) section is about Bankruptcy to scare good cult children into never even touching a credit card, because people who have debt are stupid, lazy, greedy, proud, and impatient. No, no, this is not a fucking joke. I'm not making this shit up.

Which leads to the somewhat only famous moment where little Joy Duggar, who's about five years old and busy adding a pretty border to her worksheet because she doesn't understand a fucking word about bankruptcy and also doesn't particularly care, because again, she's five fucking years old, gets told by her mother, "Joy, bankruptcy doesn't mean you go to the bank."

So, to make a long story short, this is why 7y/o Madison Matthews knows about bankruptcy! Because fundies teach their children that!

[shinesurge]

Weird recommendation BUT since I deal a bit in ex-christian stuff and have an amount of yall following, the Shiny Happy People documentary is definitely worth a watch if you can stomach it. It's not so much about the Duggars but about the religion behind it, if you want to understand a little more about fundamentalist christianity or you're someone who came from it who finds it cathartic to see it called what it is (A Fucking Cult) I definitely recommend it

We just finished it and I'm kinda floored still, seeing these for-real christian conspiracies get talked about seriously is such a weird relief ugh. I always feel crazy when I talk about the kinds of things that went on in my churches and it's all being very calmly laid out like a real fact to be respected, without any kid gloves. It's a rough watch though please mind the content warnings on it.

[jarredlharris]

Live-threading my thoughts while listening to the Thereafter podcast episode about the Ashley Madison docuseries.

The following is a transcript of the live-thread I posted while listening to Thereafter podcast episode 104.

Well, @cortlandcoffey and @thepursuinglife released a new @thereafterpodcast episode yesterday, so I better get to listening and live-threading my thoughts. Let's do this!

Before I get going, I will note that the episode's description has a content note/trigger warning for child sexual abuse, particularly as committed my some Christian pastors. This is because they will be talking about Robert Morris. Since I will likely comment on that part of the episode, I want to repeat that warning for this thread as well.CONTENT NOTE: Discussion Child Sexual Abuse, especially as committed by (some) Christian pastors. @thereafterpodcast

Wow. Has it really only been a week since the story about Robert Morris came out? It feels like it's been longer, given how understandably intense the conversations has been. @thereafterpodcast

The thing about the people who are outraged or surprised is that the the most likely they're having that reaction is they haven't been paying attention. @thereafterpodcast

Interesting thought on the statute of limitations: In some states (I don't know if Texas is one such state), the statute of limitations may not apply if there's been an ongoing effort to cover up the original crime. Just food for thought. @thereafterpodcast

@cortlandcoffey is mentioning Josh Duggar and other examples of how this represents patterns of behavior rather than a one-off event. I think that's an important point. @thereafterpodcast

I could be confusing her with someone else, but I think @joluehmann wrote a wonderful thread on Twitter quite some time ago explaining how purity culture and white evangelical culture in general tends to enable and attract predators. It was a fantastic read and highly relevant to this conversation. @thereafterpodcast

Of course, I suspect a lot of people have written similar threads. @thereafterpodcast

Not going to lie. I often argue with some Christians about how I feel their god is evil. But it has nothing to do with any crimes any minister has ever committed. @thereafterpodcast

On to the discussion about Ashley Madison! @thereafterpodcast

I have not watched the docuseries @thepursuinglife and @cortlandcoffey are talking about. I haven't decided whether I'm going to. @thereafterpodcast

Life is short. Spend as much time with (non-toxic) family as possible. @thereafterpodcast

.@cortlandcoffey is talking about how he doesn't see leading a secret double life as a way to improve one's life. I tend to agree with him.

Of course, being who he is, @cortlandcoffey suggests just opening up about the fact that you want to have sex with other people and seeing if your partner/spouse is open to that. I'm good with that too! @thereafterpodcast

.@thepursuinglife is proposing that relationships have a "check-in" period every five years. I agree, though wonder if a shorter time period might be good. @thereafterpodcast

.@cortlandcoffey is pointing out that he's against compulsory monogamy, but not voluntary monogamy. I think that's an important distinction. @thereafterpodcast

Of course, I think this requires a lot of shedding societal beliefs about monogamy to get to the point where you can choose it and have that choice be 100% voluntary. And I say that as someone who is happily in a monogamous relationship. @thereafterpodcast

What's really weird is that my husband and I just had a long discussion about our commitment to monogamy the other day. We both decided we prefer monogamy, but would be open to trying something else if the other person felt they needed that. So I guess that's our check-in for the next five years? @thereafterpodcast

Oh right, they're actually talking about Ashley Madison and the docuseries about it. I had almost forgotten! 🤣 @thereafterpodcast

This has been a fascinating conversation. I really haven't had anything to add in the past 10+ minutes. @thereafterpodcast

.@thepursuinglife and @cortlandcoffey seem great at giving relationship advice. I guess if the deconstruction podcast ever fails, they'd have a backup. *ducks* @thereafterpodcast

Another great episode! @thereafterpodcast

[afriendlyblackhottie]

Birthday

Request: Ok but the way I like low key wanna go to a strip club with Chris and watch him sit back while a stripper with a big ass twerks on him and gives him the absolute time of his life 💀

Request: Hey am I request a Chris Evans x black reader where they’re neighbors

Request: Could you do a Chris x Shy reader where the reader likes him and he likes her but she doesn’t know he likes her. Could it be possibly a smut with a really freaky reader thankssssss <333

Request: Chris Jamal evans eating plus sized! Readers ass 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

Summary: when you told Chris you wanted him to teach you a thing or two after your divorce, he hadn’t been expecting it like this.

Pairings: Chris Evans x black!plus sized! Neighbor! Reader

Warnings: minors dni, smut, daddy kink, Duggar-esque religious beliefs, strippers, lap dance,  cunnilingus, analingus, rough sex, humiliation, dirty talk, breeding kink, sort of cuckqueaning

(A/N: this is kinda different. Idk just thought it would be fun to write a story about a fundie girl getting corrupted by this man 🤷🏾‍♀️ hopefully you guys see what I was going for cuuuuz 😳 lol and I had to combine a lot of requests cuz they’ve just been sitting and I’ll feel better once they’re gone. This story is unedited so if you see mistakes idk what to tell you. anyway like, follow, and comment with a reblog 💜 ✌🏾)

———-—————-—-—————-———

It wasn’t like he’d gotten well-aquatinted with the side no one else was allowed to see by now. You’d gotten yourselves into some messes for sure. Messing around in inappropriate places. His shy girl turned naughty slut and only for him.

Like that time he was finger fucking you in the back of a very packed movie theatre. You just looked so fucking hot that night. At least the movie was rated R.

Or the time he made you orgasm on vacation because he made you keep a bullet vibrator inside of you. As he made you cum in the water while you were on the beach. Watching your face change as you buried yourself into his chest trying to stop yourself from crying out. All he could do was smirk at you. Fucking slut.

If anything you were just paying him back which was fair. The two of you had been very worked up. It was kind of hard since no one really knew the two of you were a thing. As far as everyone else knew you were just his sweet little neighbor.

No one had even expected you to come out tonight anyway. You seemed like a shy thing but he knew better. Just cuz you had Scott and everyone else fooled didn’t mean he was the same way. He could tell you were a freak from the moment he met you and yet he’d still been unprepared by it.

You just did things no one else would ever think to do. By now he’d gotten the chance to enjoy your true nastiness. The way you let him fuck you anywhere he felt like. Had become his free use slut.

The two of you weren’t technically a couple yet but after tonight he doesn’t know. This had been new even for you. He didn’t even know you were- it was just so unexpected.

Fuck, it was hot, though, you trying to hang. Obviously you’d been invited to dinner and from there it ended up being wherever the wind took all of you.

First a bar not far from the restaurant. He’d made you sit by him all night. Barely let you out of his sight. Knew one of his friends had a little crush on you and he wasn’t about to catch himself slipping just cuz it wasn’t official.

You’d been all pouty and shit about how bad you felt about not bringing a gift. Not like it was your fault. It was kind of last minute anyway. Hell he thought he was going to be out of town but he… fine he wanted to see you. So he made the quick trip. Scott told everyone to come out for dinner and there you were.

You were wearing this dress you knew he liked. One that he really liked taking off of you. He doesn’t think you saw yourself in the way he did but holy fuck did he see you. Just everything since that first moment when you’d moved in. How shy you’d been because you definitely were not used to having a neighbor like him.

You came from a much smaller community. Had moved in next door with your husband. Well, ex-husband.

While nothing happened when you were married, the two of you had gotten close. Where you were from divorce was uncommon, but since it had been five years with no baby it was kind of inevitable.

The pressure to conceive had started getting to you around the second year. By then your now ex had been trying to be all buddy buddy with him. Trying to convert him and shit. He played along for a minute just to get close to you cuz underneath the modesty clothing he really liked what he saw.

And it wasn’t like he swooped in after the papers were filed either. He’d just done a lot to help considering your parents were trying to make you go back home to raise your siblings or nieces and nephews.

By then your friendship had grown to where he was not going to let that happen. Had even managed to get you a lawyer when they tried to force you to give up the house. Saying that since the church owned it, you had to leave but you were taking your seat ass time to move out.

When the two of you first started messing around you’d been asking him questions. Had never done this before. Never got to date. Didn’t even get to have your first kiss until the officiant said, ‘you may now kiss the bride.’

He didn’t want to take advantage of you knowing how inexperienced you were, but it quickly became clear that you were going to be a monster all on your own. He’d rather be the one taking care of you rather than getting yourself into dangerous situations out of curiosity. And fuck was he more than happy to be given the honors.

He genuinely hadn’t expected that side from you. After being blamed over and over about the fertility issues plaguing your past relationship, you seemed more than ready to explore a side of you that you would have never been able to before.

Wanted to know what it was like for a man to slap your ass and pull your hair. To be called dirty, filthy names. To be degraded and treated like the slut you weren’t supposed to want to be, but tonight had pushed the limit.

He wonder what your ex would say if he saw you. It had been something you’d never thought you’d do but you were down for anything Daddy told you to be down for.

What a fucking loser didn’t see what the fuck he had? That if he just treated you right, he probably would have been able to keep you. Sucks for him because Chris wasn’t planning on fumbling that bag. Not after tonight. His mind had been officially made up. Where the fuck was he about to find another nasty girl like you.

Last time I saw you, you’d been kind of upset. It had been hard to shake those teachings sometimes. Had worried that he’d judge you or think less of you. Clearly right now none of that was on your mind as your only goal seemed to be getting to his dick.

And, fuck he was not complaining. Hell no. Who the fuck was he to turn down road head especially after the shit the two of you had just gotten up to.

When one of the guys joked about going to a strip club, he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. Had even offered to just take you home where he knew he’d end up texting them that something came up since he knew he’d be to busy trying to get balls deep in you.

You surprised him by saying, “I wanna go.” When you said you wanted to try new things you’d definitely meant it. If anything he was proud of the little deviant he’d turned you into.

You’d looked so cute watching them dance with those wide eyes. He was still close to you not helping as he paid attention to your reactions.

Had whispered in your ear for you to stop money in one of the girls thong. Chris laughed and almost forgot that the two of you were supposed to be a secret cuz he really wanted to fucking kiss you.

Besides the dancer seemed to take a liking to the two of you. Moving onto his lap first to sit on him. “You know you and your girlfriend are pretty cute,” she said. “You should come in the back for a dance.”

And he wasn’t even going to correct her that you weren’t technically his girlfriend cuz hell you may as well be. Which meant he wanted you to be okay with it. At the same time though you couldn’t just expect him to not react when a woman with a big ass like hers was moving all on him.

He motioned with his head for you to get up. Not even giving you a chance for a choice. You wanted to come to a strip club he’d show you what it was like. Why hold back.

As she moved over him you sat beside him all giggly. Chanel staring back at you with a smirk as she started grinding down on him. You watching as she twerked, biting your lip.

He still couldn’t stop watching you. Trying to see how far you were gonna let him go with this. Getting a little closer and looking up at him with big eyes. Fuck it. Didn’t matter that another girl was in his lap then you wouldn’t mind if he kissed you.

“How you feeling, Baby?” He asked.

“Good,” you squeaked out which made him chuckle. So fucking cute. And you were really letting him just ruin whatever innocence your parents tried to install in you.

As if you would go home to live without this. At this point he’d made you his little addict. Pushing you further and further with each encounter, but there was definitely something in particular about this month.

“Happy birthday, Daddy,” you whispered in his ear, kissing his earlobe making him shiver. How even when a stripper was giving him a lap dance the reaction he got from you was so much more intense.

“It’s your birthday?” Chanel gasped finally turning around. “Why didn’t you say so?” She asked, putting her hands on either side of his shoulders so she could sink down on him again this time straddling him. Tits all in his face as she sat like that.

Chris chuckled. “Yup that’s why we’re here,” he said. “My girl’s never done this before.”

“What!” She gasped again and pouted at you. “Awww. Oh my gosh maybe I need to be dancing on you.”

“Oh you should definitely give her a dance,” Chris said with a wink.

He could see you tense up almost worrying that he’d taken it too far but he still wanted to see what would happen. Chanel moving moved off of him to you relaxing as you started giggling when she moved towards you.

The dancer giggled back the two of you starting off on your own little conversation. She was clearly trying to make you feel more comfortable. “That’s my good girl,” he leaned over to whisper in your ear. “My girl is down for anything I tell her to be, huh?”

You nodded at him as Chanel put her knee between your legs as she gyrated along your thigh. “You two are so damn cute,” she cooed.

At some point she moved back to Chris and you’d gotten so worked up that you couldn’t help yourself as you started kissing his neck. Honestly if the two of you hadn’t gotten out of there when you did, he would have popped.

Hadn’t even bothered to go back to his friends, just texting one that the two of you were leaving. His hand in yours as you went to the car.

“You doing okay?” He asked before he could open up the door for you.

“Mhm,” you hummed back with a smile.

“Did you have fun?”

“Mhm,” you hummed again, seeming to be lost in your head.

Chris found himself really wanting to kiss you. Fuck after all that he was really pent up. You put your hands around his neck as he pushed against you. Wanting you to feel his hard on.

He was just happy you were kissing him back. Had worried about scaring you off. That was a lot for you all at once. He didn’t want to completely overwhelm you tonight.

“Are you having a good birthday?” You asked him

“Course I am,” he replied with a smile before pecking your lips again. “My naughty little girl letting me play with a stripper in front of her. What would your husband have to say about that?” He teased.

You always giggled whenever he did that and this time was no different. Smacking his shoulder and scoffing. “Probably have a heart attack,” you said.

“Do you think he’d call your dad like when he found your sex toys?” Chris laughed making you do the same. God, that had been so embarrassing.

By then you’d already told Chris your dilemma. How you wanted to explore. He’d of course taken it upon himself to fund your exploration. By now he’d had a lot of fun using them on you. Shame your ex saw them as competition and not teammates. Maybe he could have kept you around.

“Oh, definitely,” you replied. “Woulda snatched me up.”

“Yeah? Sucks for him cuz I’d have to snatch you back,” he said before kissing you again. You moaned into his mouth, nails clawing into his shoulder.

“Fuck, Chris,” you moaned into his mouth making him smirk.

Fuck he needed to get you home.

It was like you’d grown impatient during the car ride that it was taking so long to get there that you couldn’t keep your hands off of him. Not like he didn’t know how needy you could get.

Hell if he’d known how you would end up reacting to having another woman twerking on him, he would have done it sooner. When you said you wanted to try new things, you’d fucking meant it, but damn he hadn’t been expecting it like this.

“What’d you think about Chanel?” He asked. Wanting to push things a step further. “You didn’t feel weird seeing me with her?”

“I mean… I dunno. I wouldn’t call it weird…”

“Yeah?” He asked. “What would you call it? Did you like it?” You bit your lip. Getting all shy on him. Except that wasn’t good enough for him. How was this supposed to work if you weren’t going to talk to him. “Ah, ah. You know better. I wanna know what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours.”

You nodded. “I mean… yeah I guess I did.”

“What about when she was all over you? Did you like that too.” You bit your lip again and he had to glance over at you when you once again hesitated on your answer.

You caught yourself before he could say anything. Good girl. “I mean… yeah… it was fun.”

“Oh, come on. I saw you moaning and shit. You don’t have to act all shy. I know you liked it.” He glanced back over at you quickly. Happy as hell you two were almost home. “In fact, I gotta say I’m pretty proud of you for how you handled yourself tonight.”

“You are?”

“Yeah,” he said with a smile. “You know, when you told me you wanted to try something’s out I wasn’t expecting you to go this far.”

“I wasn’t either,” you replied. “But you’re right it did feel good.”

“That’s my girl,” he said. “You know you can always tell me anything.”

“I know, Daddy. Thank you.”

“Always, Baby,” he said, grabbing your hand so he could place a kiss to it. He liked that he could push you. Made him wonder what else he could push you to do.

By the time you got home he was already trying to put his hands on you. Kissing you against after he helped you out of the car even though normally you tried to be discrete about your relationship just in case one of the neighbors saw.

As far as everyone knows you were literally just friends. No way Chris would take advantage of a sweet innocent girl like you. If only they fucking knew.

And you didn’t seem to care this time. Letting him grab all on you. Cuz you knew better than to tell him to stop. Fuck all he could think about was getting inside of you.

As soon as you got in the house, Dodger was at your feet. Stopping whatever action as he greeted the two of you. Then whimpering for Chris to take him out. You giggled before pecking his lips again as he groaned.

“I’m gonna go shower,” you told him as you started to walk away from him.

There wasn’t much he could do to rush Dodger. Not that he didn’t try. Goddamn you were really upstairs. Naked in his shower and he was outside making sure his dog used the bathroom. Fucking great.

“Come on, Bubba,” he said finally getting him back inside. Ready to sprint upstairs to you.

He could see you behind the foggy glass still washing up. He just wanted to fuck you so bad right now. To feel you against him. That pussy wrapped around him. Couldn’t get undressed fast enough.

You jumped as he wrapped his arms around your soft body. Curves glistening with water. Damn you had really turned him into an addict, but it was like where the hell was he supposed to find another you. Someone so sweet and cute that would let him do what he’s about to do to you. Fuck yeah he was addicted.

As he opened up the door he stared at you as he caught you playing with your pussy. Eyes closed as you breathed heavily. Good you wanted this just as bad as him. Fingers working over your clit.

Funny a year ago the thought of you even touching yourself seemed like a step too far. Now you were doing it in his shower after what had just happened less than an hour ago.

“D-daddy,” you whimpered.

He needed to fucking have you. “Starting without me, Babe?” He asked, making you jump and open your eyes. You gasped as you looked up at him and he chuckled. “My poor baby, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Then he pouted out his bottom lip before pulling you into his arms.

He leaned down to kiss you finally. His tongue caressing against yours. Grabbing onto that thick ass. Fuck he wanted you so bad.

“You get all nice and clean for me?” He asked, having pulled away. “Or did you get too distracted playing with my pussy?”

“I got distracted.”

“My little slut. Couldn’t keep her hands to herself.”

Chris remembered the first time you asked him to call you names. He wasn’t sure how you would react but all you did was moan for him even louder and repeat it back. That’s when he first knew just how far gone he’d gotten you.

“Tell me what you were thinking about, Baby? Had you moaning for me for a reason.”

“About you letting Chanel dance all over you in front of me,” you whimpered.

“Yeah?” He asked. “That turn you on?”

You nodded. “Uh huh. She was all over you.”

“My naughty slut liked seeing another woman all over me.” He chuckled.

“It made me want you so bad.”

“I know, Baby. It made me want you too,” he said before pressing his lips to yours again.

It didn’t take long for his fingers to end up on you now. Picking up from where you’d left off. You crying out for him to fuck you. Needy as hell.

Turning around so you could rub your ass against him as he finger fucked you. “Please, Daddy,” you mewled.

“What is it?”

“I want your dick in me,” you moaned.

“I want you to finish up and go wait on the bed for me, okay?”

You pouted. “But-,”

“But, nothing. You fucking heard me,” he snapped and that was that. You finished washing up and went to finish getting ready for bed. You didn’t want to spend the rest of the night getting punished so you better do what he tells you.

As bad as he just wanted to fuck the shit out of you, he knew how you got when he made you wait. Pushing you and then denying you. Fuck he loved it.

Once again you were there touching yourself. The toy you kept over here in your hand. Greedy fucking slut couldn’t fucking wait.

“Did I tell you, you could use your fucking toy?” He asked with an eyebrow raise.

“No,” you squeaked as you didn’t remove that damn rose from your clit.

He climbed in next to you. Taking hold of the rose. “So horny you just can’t fucking control yourself, huh?”

“Uh huh,” you answered, biting your lip. “Fuck, Daddy,” you whimpered. He started kissing your neck making you cry out. His lips quickly finding your nipples. “Oh my god,” you cried. “Fuck, please, fuck!”

He put the toy to the side when he finally couldn’t resist. Had been dying to eat you out for hours. Needed to taste you.

“Chris!” You gasped and that’s when he knew he had you right where he wanted you. Had you gasping his name as he ate you out like he was starving.

“And you better not fucking cum yet,” he cooed.

He remembered the first time he’d made you cum. You hadn’t even know what the hell that meant. Figured he could show you better than he could tell you and wanted the honors of being the first one to do it for you.

Had gotten you all worked up until you squirted all over his sheets. Had gotten you all embarrassed about it too. Couldn’t believe your husband had never done this for you. Fucking worthless.

He was tempted to see if he could get you worked up like that again except he wanted to fuck you too bad. Didn’t even want to wait for you to suck his dick before finally pushing into you. Cuz this was the first time he was going to feel you for real.

“Chris!” You sobbed as you wrapped your legs around him. “Yes!” You dug your fingernails into his back. Crying out for him in his ear. “Please. Oh, god. I need it. Don’t stop.”

“I’m not gonna stop,” he groaned, grabbing your hands to push them above your head. Pumping his cock in and out of you. “Fucking slut needed my dick bad, didn’t you?”

“Uh huh,” you whimpered, lolling your head back. Fuck he felt so good so deep inside of you. Your ex had never been able to do shit like this to you.

It was funny how easy Chris brought the freak out in you. Had definitely gotten you to this point you don’t think any other man could have ever brought out.

Porn didn’t do what he did to you any justice. You hadn’t been expecting for it to feel like this. Didn’t seem real that something everyone had told you was so bad felt so good, but never this good.

“Please, Daddy,” you whimpered as he hit those bundle of nerves. “Fuck you feel so fucking good.”

“Yeah? I didn’t put a condom on this time, Baby,” he finally told you. “Gonna see what happens if I stuff you with my cum.”

“What do you mean?” You asked him.

“See if I can put my baby in you,” he grunted. “Don’t you wanna know?”

“But, Eddie-,” you were saying.

“Don’t you fucking say his name when my dick is inside of you,” he said, putting his hand around your neck. “I don’t give a fuck what he couldn’t do.”

And he meant every word of that. Only rocking his hips deeper into you. Feeling as you tightened up around him when he grabbed your throat. Eyes getting all blurry and teary.

“I’m sorry,” you whimpered.

“That’s right, Baby. You should be. You should fucking know better by now. I think you like saying dumb shit sometimes.”

You let out such an embarrassing moan and he let out a chuckle through his deep breathing. God he loved seeing how worked up you got from being shamed like that.

“Just cuz he couldn’t fuck a baby into you, doesn’t mean I won’t,” Chris said into your ear wanting to keep it going. “Chanel already thought you were my girlfriend. Might as well make you my girl for real, huh?”

You let out another moan with your face all screwed up. Goddamn he was getting you close. “Okay.”

“That’s my pretty girl,” he cooed. “You’re gonna let me fuck my baby into you?”

“Yes,” you whimpered. “Fuck you’re gonna make me- ah!” You cried as you came. Finally getting the release you’d been needing.

“That’s a good girl,” he said before pulling out so he could turn you over. Making sure your ass was in the air. What can he say, he loved manhandling you.

Pushing your cheeks to the side so he could see the wetness from your pussy dripping down to his sheets. He needed to play with it again. Putting his thumb against your slit so he could rub up and down before going to your clit.

“Yeah you want me to get you pregnant, don’t you?” He said. “I bet you’ve been waiting for it. And your pathetic ass would do anything I wanted you to do, huh?”

Another embarrassing ass moan as you shuddered, as he pushed his pointer and middle fingers into you.

“Oh my god,” you cried into the pillow.

He doesn’t know what the fuck it was but all he knew was that he was mesmerized. Couldn’t help himself. Wanting to eat your pussy from the back. You jumped before moving your hips trying to get situated against his face.

God he was obsessed with the way you tasted. Could make a feast out of it. At this point he was so far he was ready to get as nasty as possible trying something he’d never tried before.

You gasped when his tongue touched your puckered hole. “Chris!” As if there was going to stop him. He moaned at the taste. Definitely not about to stop.

Chest heaving as thick moans fell from your lips. You were pretty sure he was trying to torture you.

Chris grabbed your toy again. Turning it back on so he could put it against your clit again. Listening to you scream out.

Finally he stopped just wanting to be inside of you again. It was like you brought out the fucking animal in him. That’s why he just needed to fucking breed you already.

Slamming into you and flexing his hips cuz he just really wanted you to feel it. Putting his hands on either side of your hips so he could dig his nails in.

“See what you fucking do to me?” He asked with a groan. “That’s why I can’t let you go. Gonna keep you under me. You want that too?”

“Yes,” you sobbed. “Fuck. Please. I want you so bad. You’re gonna make me fuckin’ cum again.”

“That’s it, Baby. I want you to cum for me. Want you to keep cumming on my dick.”

Eyes rolling to the back of your head at his words. Couldn’t hold yourself up anymore so you ended up collapsing against the pillows. Chris going with it so he could lay on top of you. Riding your ass as deep as he could as you sobbed.

“Gonna make me a daddy for my birthday, huh?” He asked into your ear.

Why did he have to talk to you like that. Did he have no mercy?

“Fuckin’ answer me,” he said. That Boston accent coming out into your ear. Making you shiver and moan.

“Yes,” you cried.

“Good, Baby. Cuz I’m gonna cum so deep in you.” He groaned. Feeling it creep up in his balls. Knew he wouldn’t be able to pull out even if he wanted to.

“Please,” you moaned.

“And it’s okay if you don’t get pregnant from this time. We’ll just try again and again and again.”

For some reason that was what did. To be honest if it didn’t happen this time he’d be shocked because he found himself shoving in all the way to the hilt so he could cum against your cervix. Just like fucking instinct. Goddamn he doesn’t think he’d ever had an orgasm that intense before.

You laid down with a whimper with him collapsing on top of you. Dick softening before falling out of you.

Scooping you up like he always did so you had to lay all up against him. Really you’d been his girl for a minute. It was about time he officially claimed you.

Especially six weeks later, when the two of you got to see the look on everyone’s faces when you’d pulled up to announce that you were expecting.

[fundiebabynamebible]

Letters to Judge Brooks: Anna and Michelle Duggar

We're 10 days out from sentencing of Josh Duggar. He faces up to 20 years but family and friends (how he still has any is beyond me but Jim Bob as money so that is that). I'm going through all the letters, as well as the memorandums, and giving any thoughts I have. I doubt I'll post about all the letters but we'll see how it goes.

I think it says a lot that none of Josh's siblings have written a letter in support of him.

Anna

No surprises here. Oh Anna.

It saddens me that Anna has never been shown any true love by a man or what a true man should be like. She has been so damaged by being in this cult, as have many girls born into it.

Can I change the Reagan quote slightly for a second? 'There is no limit to the amount of damage you can do if you don't care about the victims.' Never once has Josh thought about his victims. All his actions have been self-centred and without thought for anyone around him. He metaphorically punched the girls he molested in the face by hiding behind his persona of supposedly turning his life around whilst he was watching some of the worst child abuse imaginable behind closed doors. God only knows the stuff he's watched before that the police don't know about.

Maybe reiterating the amount of children that are waiting at home for a paedophile is not the best move. Also, imagine having to think of an example of the time he was a good husband and him sweeping up crackers being the best you can think off. I bet he went for a nap after that incredibly exhausting task too.

I highly doubt she understands the seriousness of what Josh has done; in many ways she herself is a victim of this serial predator. I do believe Anna is a victim but I also think she is an enabler. Many times she has been warned what Josh is like, including by those who escaped the cult themselves, but she hasn't listened. She is surrounded by men who share many characteristics with Josh; her father Mike Keller, her brother-in-law David Waller and father-in-law Jim Bob. These men have contributed to continually brainwash vulnerable girls and women like Anna. Josh's youngest sisters Johannah, Jennifer, Jordyn and Josie continue to go through this brainwashing process, and his daughters and nieces are just at the beginning of it.

As I read through all the letters I see they focus on what a good father Josh supposedly is; so repetitive but nothing anyone can say can save him now. The difference between Anna and Michelle is Michelle had a life before the cult, she has memories from before she married the piece of shit that lies next to her in bed every night, but Anna was born into the cult and knows no different.

Michelle

It blows my mind how Michelle can sign such an important document in such a childish manner. How can she think it's appropriate? I always thought the heart above the 'I' was saved for autographs but clearly now.

She actually started the letter with 'hello'🤦‍♀️.

Josh is no man. No real man would continually abuse children the way he has!

If Josh was so 'wise financially' he wouldn't have made his family live in his parents' warehouse.

Michelle goes on and on about what a supportive husband Josh is to Anna, I wonder what Judge Brooks would think if he knew Josh insisted on having a nap whilst Anna was in labour!!!

'We implore your wisdom for a just decision in this matter'= release my son, he's been through enough. We promise to send him to Jesus camp so he can mend his ways and set his lost soul on a better past. NO NO NO!!!!!

Michelle knows none of her children as individuals. She has written a letter that is very generic and of no individuality, full of lies and desperation. You could replace Josh with John, Jedidiah, Jason, Joseph or any of the names of the other Duggar sons and it would still make sense because it's just her image of the perfect Christian man/husband. She sure wouldn't write a letter like this if it was Jill in trouble.

Many of the men who engage in downloading CSAM show absolutely no signs of it. Michelle may well think Josh is a loving father, great husband and father, can sell a few cars and sweep a few floors but she doesn't seem to understand that these are the sort of people who engage in these activities. They hide in plain sight because they do not want to be caught. Josh tried to hide the material, there has never been any remorse from him or any attempt to change his ways.

[cbk1000]

So, re: the Josh Duggar (fuck him to infinity and beyond) stuff: I don’t know if anyone else is following his arrest, but he had a bond hearing last week, and someone who was able to attend the hearing (via Zoom, of course) did a really great write-up of the details on Reddit and provided a lot of helpful links, so I was following that thread. The hearing of course went into more detail regarding his alleged crimes, and I’ll put that under a cut. Note that I’m not going into graphic detail, for one because it’s not necessary to do so to talk about how serious this is, and for two because I don’t know it. Based on the way people were tiptoeing around actual descriptions of the images he possessed, I knew that was a google rabbit hole even I couldn’t go down. I sincerely urge you not to google it; many people described reading the Wikipedia article about a notorious piece of child sexual abuse material that was on his computer and feeling nauseated, despite the fact that the article didn’t go into super explicit detail. Don’t do it for morbid curiosity; even I’M not that self-punishing.

He had an internet accountability program on his computer called Covenant Eyes which is a sort of family internet filter that monitors activity to keep your kids (or husband in this case) from seeing anything inappropriate. I would assume this was on Josh’s computer because if I remember correctly, either before or around the time of the Ashley Madison scandal, there was some Jesus kerfuffle over him viewing porn. A sex worker also came forward to say that he assaulted her during a paid sexual encounter, so I’m sure the family had Good Christian concerns about how his proclivities were tarnishing their reputation. (Not concerns about their daughters literally getting molested, of course; but that was their fault for being girls.) This was a personal work laptop that I’m sure their kids didn’t have access to, so this was probably specifically meant to monitor him. 

He also had disc partitioning software on his computer, which enables you to run multiple operating systems at once. There are plenty of legit reasons to do this; you can use it for gaming or IT purposes, and I’m sure plenty of other things as well. In addition to this, however, he had a dark web browser, so any defense he tries to mount that argues these got on his computer accidentally while he was viewing regular porn isn’t going to fly; he very clearly went looking for this, and took steps to cover his tracks. Partitioning or accessing the dark web apparently do not require someone to have super advanced computer skills, but they DO require some research; neither is something that accidentally happens by clicking on the wrong link.  

Investigators found over 200 images (and one video) of child sexual abuse media that were downloaded and deleted in just one day. Offenders often have loads and loads of images, so the speculation is that there are probably many more, but these are the images they have an airtight case for, i.e. they can prove absolutely that Josh himself was the one who downloaded and accessed these images, since digital crimes can be a bit trickier to prove since a lawyer can argue that a client’s computer may have been used, but it was not the client themselves engaging in the illegal activity. He also might have been extraordinarily unlucky and got caught his first time doing this, or (and what I unfortunately suspect), he’s been doing it for a while, deleting/moving the images elsewhere, and some activity caught the eyes of the Feds somehow or possibly someone turned him in. (There is some speculation that one of his brothers reported him; one of them worked at the same car lot that was raided, and reportedly came home very shaken one day not long before the raid. He also was very quiet on social media and didn’t defend Josh, nor comment on the raid, which some people are speculating is due to the fact that he’s involved in the investigation. This is, again, speculation, and I don’t know how accurate or likely any of it is.) It’s also possible that, due to the nature of some of the material he downloaded, which is apparently a piece of child sexual assault media notorious for being the worst of the worst, he was flagged by Feds monitoring that particular piece of media, and got caught that way.

I listen and watch quite a bit of true crime media, and I had never heard of this before, but apparently the video he downloaded was part of a series that was once considered an urban legend, because it was so over-the-top vile. People realized it was real when the man who produced it was arrested. I’m going to caution you again here: do NOT google this. I’ve seen lots of posters on reddit reporting that they felt sick just from reading fairly non-specific descriptions of what the video contains. It involved a 11-year-old, an 18-month-old, and a third child whose age I can’t recall. (And I’m not going to go looking for it, because in reading up on this case I started stumbling across people being a little free with their descriptions of the images, without any warning, so I’ve taken a break from looking at that to avoid running across knowledge I don’t want to have.)

One of the investigators who testified said it was one of the top five worst of the worst cases that he’s seen, and these investigators work lots of theses type of cases. The film mentioned above involves actual torture of the children involved; the 11-year-old was murdered. It’s a little unclear how much media he had relating to this film, but he had a two minute video clip which I believe was from the film; I don’t know if there were any still images. Regardless, as bad as ‘normal’ child sexual assault media is, he was in possession of some incredibly violent material against children that had seasoned special agents remarking on the severity of it. 

He’s a dangerous sexual predator; this is beyond even pedophilia--this seems to be straight up sadism. 

[wtffundiefamilies]

According to the tweets about his hearing he can't be left alone with minors. 🤢 I doubt it's financial crime.

Yeah, I’ve kept up and...shit.  I really didn’t think it would be this.  Thought people speculating that were jumping to the worst possible conclusions because everyone (rightly) thinks the worst when Josh is involved.  

I don’t for a second believe that Michelle and JimBob had no idea - the “Duggar body safety rules” in the bathroom were printed on brand-new paper and we never once saw it before that photo.  Initially I just assumed it was pandering - so someone could see it in a pic and feel like they took Josh’s crimes seriously.  Now I’m assuming it was a warning.  One they could make while still protecting their Golden Boy.  Because as always, Josh first, themselves second, others and Jesus never.

[duggardata]

Apparently, Jinger Suffered A Miscarriage in November

Everything Duggar Data Knows About It, So Far.

ICYMI—Jinger is pregnant, due in November 2020!  She announced via People yesterday.  Sad news came alongside happy, though...  People also shared that Jinger experienced a miscarriage prior to her current pregnancy.

Pregnancy loss now factors into the Predictor, so Duggar Data is trying to figure out as much information as possible about when the miscarriage occurred, and at how far along.  This Post summarizes what I’ve been able to piece together.

Since some may not want to read on...  After the jump.

Fair Warning—This Post is absurdly long.  There’s a TL;DR at the end, if you’re in a hurry!

When Did Jinger Miscarry?

Per Jinger and Jeremy, it happened in November 2019.  (Initially, People simply said it happened “last fall,” which ostensibly includes September to November.  Then, the Vuolos posted on Instagram about the loss, revealing it had occurred in November, specifically.)  Jinger further shared that it happened on a Tuesday; she said she and Jeremy shared the news with family on “Monday evening,” but miscarried “the next morning.”  [Jeremy’s IG Post, Jinger’s IG Post.  Permalinks provided in the text above.]

So, a Tuesday in November 2019...  We’ve already narrowed it down a lot.  The possibilities include only these dates—

Tuesday, November 5, 2019

Tuesday, November 12, 2019

Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

Since yesterday, we’ve also been provided two additional data sources, both of which provide further insight into the timing of the miscarriage—

The Counting On Trailer.  TLC announced the new season alongside Jinger + Jeremy’s pregnancy announcement, and dropped the first trailer.  At 0:30–0:46, the trailer features Jinger + Jeremy announcing a pregnancy to Jinger’s family...  The Duggars are gathered at the Big House for “their family fun night,” which is held weekly on Mondays.  The night’s activity was gingerbread house–building.  Skyping in from California, Jinger + Jeremy build a gingerbread version of their family, complete a clearly–pregnant ginger Jinger.

Some have assumed that the ‘Jingerbread’ Announcement was for the Vuolos’ current pregnancy, but it’s clear to me that it wasn’t.  The timing doesn’t make sense.  Jinger is due with Vuolo #2* in November 2020, and she wouldn’t have learned she was pregnant until ~March 2020.  Given gingerbread’s association with fall and the holidays, Duggar Data really doubts that the Duggars decided to do a gingerbread–themed family night in March or April.  Additionally, social distancing due to COVID–19 was well underway by March / April 2020, yet the clip shows a large gathering of not–same–household Duggars.  Notably, Jessa + Ben appear in the clip, and they’ve stated that they’re staying away from the Big House during this time.  Taken together, all of this all suggests that the clip wasn’t recorded in March or April 2020—and thus, can’t be an announcement of Jinger’s current pregnancy.  This must be Jinger + Jeremy announcing their pregnancy that ended in miscarriage in November.

Immediately, I hoped that I could figure out the timing based on which Duggar Ladies were visibly pregnant or which Duggar Babies appeared.  Babygeddon was in full force, after all!  Sadly, this didn’t narrow things down much...  Joe + Kendra were present with Addison (b. 11–2–19), but that doesn’t rule anything out; the earliest Monday in November 2019 was November 4th.  (I’d admit it’s slightly unlikely that Kendra made it to Family Night two day after giving birth, but I don’t think it’s impossible...  They live on the Compound.)  Neither Anna nor Lauren, nor Maryella or Bella, is seen.  Josiah appears, but it that doesn’t tell us much, since Lauren wasn’t in labor on a Monday.  (Bella was born on a Friday after ~2 Days of labor.)

Undeterred, I scoured Duggar Instagrams to see if I could figure out what they did and who attended each Family Night in November 2019.  I also looked for any photos in which a Duggar is wearing the same outfit that’s seen in the clip of the ‘Jingerbread’ Announcement...

Based on this sleuthing, I think we can rule out November 4, 2019.  Per Anna, that Family Night was spent stuffing gift boxes for Operation Christmas Child.  Her Post shows dozens of bright red boxes all over the Big House.  No boxes are seen in the ‘Jingerbread’ Announcement clip, but they probably would’ve been if they were there.  (The gingerbread house building activity appeared to take up the entire living room.)  Plus, I think it’s unlikely that they’d do two big activities in one night.

I wasn’t able to figure out the activities at the other Family Nights that month.

I checked Instagram to see if any Duggar visible in the clip was, e.g., out–of–town, and thus wouldn’t have been present at a particular Family Night.  This search didn’t produce any evidence sufficient to rule anything out.

As for the outfit search, it also didn’t produce many leads...  Only one.  Jessa posted a photo on Instagram on Monday, November 25, 2019, in which she’s possibly wearing the same long–sleeve emerald shirt that she’s seen in in the clip.  So, that points slightly towards November 25, 2019 as the date Jinger + Jeremy announced, and November 26, 2019 as the Date of Loss.

The Vuolos’ Instagram Live.  On May 28, 2020 at 4:00 PM, Jinger + Jeremy did an Instagram Live discussing the pregnancy and earlier miscarriage.  The Live gave us various information, but one fact is of particular relevance, here:  Per the Vuolos, Jeremy’s Sister (Valerie) visited them very shortly after Jinger miscarried.  Apparently, her trip was pre–planned, and it just worked out that she was there during a time when they happened to really need help.

Turns out, Valerie Vuolo has a public Instagram—and lucky for us, she posted about the trip in question.  On November 30, 2019, she put up three Posts w/ photos of her, Felicity, and Jeremy, each one tagged Los Angeles, California.  Even more telling, the first Post included #Thanksgiving, which pretty much confirms that Valerie was visiting for the holiday, which was November 28th in 2019.  Bolstering this further, Valerie actually posted the photos on November 30th, and Jinger commented:  “We miss you already!”  So...  Clearly, Valerie is no longer in Los Angeles, at that point.

Based on all of this, I’ve got a very strong suspicion that Jinger miscarried Tuesday, November 26, 2019—i.e., the Tuesday before Thanksgiving—which means she announced the pregnancy to the Duggars on November 25, 2019.  This is mostly based on the apparent timing of Valerie’s trip, but also happens to line up with Jessa’s November 25 IG Post, in which she’s possibly wearing the same shirt she wore for the ‘Jingerbread’ Announcement.  Also, Tuesday, November 26, 2019 happens to be a day where neither Vuolo posted on IG...  Could be a coincidence, though; they didn’t post on Tuesday, November 12th, either.

Duggar Data plans to use November 26, 2019 as Jinger’s Loss Date, for now.  It’s considered “Not Confirmed.”  I think we can rule out November 4th as the announcement date—so if the Loss Date isn’t the 26th, it must be the 12th or 19th.

Was This Her First Miscarriage?

During the Instagram Live on May 28, 2020, Jinger + Jeremy said “thank you” to their followers for all the support they’d received after announcing Jinger’s miscarriage.  Then, they said something about how miscarriage is something that many couples go through, and Jeremy said:  “We’ve now gone through that.”  Duggar Data took this to mean that Jinger’s recent miscarriage wasn’t something they’d gone through before, which obviously means that this must have been Jinger’s first—and, so far, only—miscarriage.

IMO, it is reasonable to conclude that this was Jinger’s first miscarriage.

How Far Along Was She, At The Time?

So far, there’s no definitive data on this; however, it’s clear that it was early on.  On Instagram Live, the Vuolos—Jinger, IIRC—referred to the baby they lost as one “that the Lord blessed us with for such a short time.”  Additionally, there isn’t any reason to assume that Jinger + Jeremy waited until, e.g., the Second Trimester to announce to her family.  (And we know the loss happened the day after she announced to them.)  With Pregnancy #1, Jinger + Jer announced to their families in November 2017, when Jinger was <6 Weeks Along.  (Felicity’s Due Date was July 20, 2018.)  [Shout–out to @undercoverduggarblog, as well as @pickledchickenetti, for your valiant efforts in piecing together the real–life timeline of Counting On.)

Absent contrary evidence, Duggar Data will assume a miscarriage occurred at Exactly 6 Weeks.  Statistically, 90% of miscarriages occur by Week 6, and the lack of concrete loss dates for several miscarriages forced me to create a rule to ensure uniformity in considering pregnancy loss data.

Impact On The Data

I’ll discuss this in an upcoming Post!  Stay tuned.

TL;DR—

Loss Date   A Tuesday in November 2019...  Probably November 26th.  Duggar Data’s spreadsheet says November 26, 2019, but doesn’t label that as “Confirmed.”  That’s what I’m using, for now.

Due Date   Unknown.  Consistent with a uniform rule, Duggar Data will assume the loss occurred at Week 6, Day 0...  The Estimated Due Date associated with November 26, 2019 is July 21, 2020.  That’s what I will use, for now.

1st Loss?  Seems like it was, yes. 

[gxlden-angels]

Shiny Happy People Thoughts: Episode 4

TW: The Duggar Family and their crimes

- All gang here we go again

- To recap, we left off on the discovery of Josh Duggar's business hard drive with CSAM on it and the affects of anti-sex and strict enforcement of hierarchies

- The episode starts with the phone call about the investigation and the discovery of CSAM linked to Josh Duggar's business IP address

- This episode is known for being the hardest to get through so be warned if you decide to also watch

- They use the term "child pornography" but I will be using the terms CSAM or child sexual abuse material

- Jen of Fundie Fridays described the Snark community's look into the investigation

- Fucking Covenant Eyes

- I think I talked about it before, but it's an anti-pornography and accountability software program where your porn use is sent to a trusted program partner

- There's a lot of talk about having to be happy at all times, which was also enforced in my households. My dad never enforce it, but other family members would insist on me smiling or they'd make me smile (meant as a threat)

- Theres also clips of Josh and Anna's courtship and how they weren't even allowed to kiss before marriage

- Bobye, Jill, and all of the other victims are incredibly brave for speaking up both during the trial and now in this docuseries

- Jim Bob ran for senate in Arkansas during said trial, which is fucking wild. I knew he did, but I didn't realize it was during the trial. They genuinely believe the issue is Josh was caught and arrested rather than the fact that Josh did these horrible crimes

- There's a firm belief in individualism and handling issues at home so they don't have to acknowledge the greater patterns of abuse in these circles else they make their christianity look bad

- It explains the "Culture War" and what's essentially meant to be a new version of the crusade. Even in my small town black churches we sang song after song about being soldiers in the army of Christ and being willing to die for him

- The greater "Culture War" is for white, cishet evangelicals. My family might follow the exact same principles, but they would never be accepted by these groups in the same way because we're black

- A lot of black people hold the fear though that if they stop following these groups/mindsets, their children will be the next victims, rather than the black kid that got overlooked. There's no positive outcome, just a fear of the worst negative

- This is why there's been an attack on education as a whole, especially in places like Florida. They started with homeschooling, grew up and graduated, then became politicians and leaders and lawyers that could make public school just like their homeschooling or gut it so much that anyone not in these groups or people that can't homeschool their kids lose significant power and educational opportunities

- I was never homeschooled, but I was told by my churches that school will teach us things like evolution that we should ignore. The pastor and his wife at one church homeschooled their kids and advocated for it

- They are specifically referring to white, homeschooled, IBLP-trained evangelicals but this shit influenced the entire christian culture of the bible belt in the US

- There's a reason these people are gun-carrying, anti-choice conservatives and why they're making up lies and attacking schools for being "leftist indoctrination camps"

- Its all a fear tactic. I even got this talk when I was in high school and planning for college. We were told to keep close contact with the church and to not even join other christian groups your parents don't know in case they teach the "corrupted" versions of christianity

- Its Madison Cawthorn. It's Matt Walsh. It's the current Supreme Court. It's Donald Trump. It's all of these people that plan to take away autonomy from people so they can enforce this christian hierarchy throughout the world

- I'm at the Paul and Morgan part of the docuseries. Their interview was about their marriage and the role of the wife. They say it's a choice to submit to their husbands, though they feel like christian women always should

- The editing was incredible in this part. It goes from them talking about the role of the wife and being a light in the world to the jump cut of Morgan screaming about how it's impossible to "be a they/them"

- This part is what is making Paul and Morgan pitch a fit because they feel like it made christianity look bad, but all they did was edit in their own words from their YouTube channel

- "This is the Joshua Generation" gave me chills

- Its Girl Defined and the Rodrigues family and tiktok influencers and so on and so forth and all of them are white evangelicals who are trying to enforce this strict hierarchy and claiming it's the only way to save people

- Its why people say be careful when looking into cottagecore and tradcore and the "soft life" movement because a lot of it is ran by evangelicals trying to make strict hierarchies look trendy

- Its incredible to be a stay at home mom and traditional housewife, but only if it's your choice. All of the insistence that feminism is "destroying motherhood" and whatnot is all a ploy to take more women's autonomy. It's why feminism advocates for things like maternal leave, universal basic income with benefits for parents and children, universal daycare, universal healthcare especially for birthing parents. All of it should be a choice you can make for yourself

- The insistence on a family of a Working Father, a Housewife, and 2 or 20 kids was spread by a cult leader who never even had a wife or kids. Gothard sexually abused multiple minors during his time as an IBLP leader

- Josh Duggar was of course found guilty.

- It hurts knowing that his victims were expected to forgive him and let him back into their lives

- A lot of the family and friends are completely shut out of the picture now for advocating for Josh's arrest

- Amy Duggar reading from IBLP hurt, especially with the cut to Anna Duggar, Josh's wife

- They talk about why she still advocates for him and stays with him. She doesn't have a way to leave since this is all she was raised for. Find a nice, godly man and have his babies. No proper education. No source of stable income for herself. No privacy

- That goes double for her as the wife of a well-known person. She will never get privacy because she only sees herself as property of god, Josh, and the TV contracts Josh signed for her and unless she gets serious therapy and a safe, long term environment where someone takes care of her, thats all she'll ever see herself as

- My therapist pointed out to me today that whenever I burp, I completely change as a person for a split second. Despite all the work I've done and my transition as a transmasculine person, I still attempt to hide my burps, cover my mouth, completely straighten up, say excuse me very articulately, and even raise the pitch of my voice

- I know that seems like a weird tangent but it's an example of how even the smallest of things gets trained into you. Burping wasn't feminine so I got called a pig and a man in an insulting way when I burped loudly enough to be heard. I still burp in that polite way that makes me nauseous so I won't be heard unless I'm completely alone

- You can't just leave these cults. It comes with you. It stays with you even in these little habits and I was lucky enough to get the chillest parent of the family. Anna cannot and will not leave unless she is forced, and even then she will still be stuck. She won't suddenly have 12-13 years of education. She won't have the skills to get a good paying job in the current economic landscape. She won't have people to save her. This is what cults do. This is what they want. They want her to be helpless because it's a message: Next time, don't let him get caught

- "My only hope was to cling to my faith."

- That's all she has. It's all that belonged to her. Everything else was her father's or her husband's

- Tia Levings describing the situation of getting her kids and leaving the husband that was going to get his gun was honestly the hardest story to hear

- I never experienced abuse like that, but I remember hearing over and over "well why wasn't she under her father/husband's watch" "why didn't she just leave?" "Why didn't she just trust in god?" and have this fear set in me of what if I never left? Is this where I would've been?

- Around my teen years I got very uncomfortable around most couples in my family. The husband would joke about wives submitting and the wives would snap back about how it's a choice they could take away. The husband retorts with a bible verse about how they shouldn't. They laugh it off and the tension sits in the air. They seem to hate each other, but they made a promise to god.....

- The lawsuit against IBLP and Bill Gothard and it being dropped because of the statute of limitations leaves such a helpless feeling, but I hope this documentary helps at least a bit

- "His eyes were open"

- "It was just a man the whole time."

- Brook and Emily's stories really hit. There's a sudden realization that these people are not gods. They are people that wanted power and they got it. They abused and crushed people, not because they are powerful gods of knowledge, but because they wanted to abuse

- WAS

- "I ended up in jail anyways."

- That's how it goes. I felt the need to lash out when I first got out. I didn't do well with my therapist at the time. She was a practicing christian recommend by my doctor who used to go to our church and also treated all of my family with insurance she took. She thought my family was a lil strict but couldn't quite believe me when I said it was so much more than that

- I did lash out, mostly towards myself. I'm not going to talk about my self harm in detail here. Lara talks about lashing out via shoplifting. I will say this is normal. If you feel like you need to do a 180, I won't say do anything and everything, but you might have to. I am a firm believer in harm reduction over flat out denial at all times. Sometimes it all just needs to get out. Sometimes you need to regain a sense of control

- I didn't realize until I started seeing my current therapist that I realized what I was raised in. I made jokes about my family being a cult before then, but it never actually hit until I said "Oh. I never had a childhood, did I?" and teared up for the first time in his office

- I honestly couldn't say the stuff about deconstruction better myself. It's exhausting but so so freeing. A lot of the people in the docuseries used instagram and tiktok. I use tumblr as my platform of choice.

- I honestly have to thank the religious trauma tumblr tag for getting me to where I am today. If you look at my main blog, you can even see that my first few posts are scattered with bible verses if I didn't already delete them. I hope my blog helps someone else the same way that tag helped me

- I get a lil personal here sometimes and probably should save more of it for my therapist, but I think it's helpful sometimes. I think he'd agree. My therapist knows about this blog and thinks it's good

- I've heard about Jinger's book but never read it so I can't say anything about it. I also haven't seen any of the casts' tiktok pages so I can't say anything about them either. I might look later but this episode was a lot so Ill leave it for now

- I figured Bill Gothard would decline further comments. He denied everything and will most likely never see a single punishment. It's how these things are built

- I think the final statement from Jim Bob and Michelle help really seal just how terrible both of them are. They rather side with their child who abused than the victims that spoke out because it makes them look bad that all of this got out

- Final thoughts? Great series. Very therapeutic. Very validating.

- Its the small stuff that gets you. Hair needs to frame your face and honor your father. Be a soldier for Christ. Be fruitful and multiply. I still have awkward pictures of my permed hair and scratchy easter dresses

- I also told my therapist about this show and my recaps here and he thinks it's great. I'm glad I did it. It's really motivated me and helped me see just how far I've progressed

- I'm glad I also learned Nope is on Prime cause I rarely use prime video lol I mostly use it for twitch and prime delivery on cat supplies in bulk

- Good luck all you blasphemers, apostates, heretics, and sinners out there! Be good people, commit to the bit, and love without remorse!

[fundie-breaking-free]

So after watching the most recent episode of welcome to plathville I think I can finally put into words why it makes me so uneasy. This is kinda personal and could be triggering to some so, fair warning I may end up talking about abuse.

Every time I watch the show I get these really mixed emotions of absolute terror and excitement. At first I couldn't even identify the emotions but after a few weeks those are what I have settled on describing them as. It is so exciting watching these kids branch out and try new things and break free but at the same time seeing the parents reactions absolutely scares the daylights out of me because their mannerisms and facial expressions remind me so much of my parents and I know what would come next if it were my parents/kim and Barry weren't being filmed. I remember the volatile feeling in the air when someone would challenge my parents or do something like Olivia did in this episode with the birthday party or moriah announcing she was going away for however long without their approval. I vividly remember the explosion that would follow in my family and the show is bringing a lot of that back up in my memories. I flinch everytime they show one of the kids doing something kim and Barry wouldn't approve of not because it's bad to do but because I fear for them how their parents react behind closed doors. I fear for them. I love seeing moriah breaking free and testing boundaries but at the same time I worry that she is going through the gaslighting and mental abuse that I went through when my husband and I left except she has to live there still and cant really escape it yet.

I'm just kind of rambling here but I guess what I'm trying to say is this; welcome to plathville makes me incredibly uneasy because it is so thinly veiled and obviously sugarcoating the years of abuse these kids and so many other of us have suffered in this movement in a way that the duggars and bates have kept more polished and hidden. It also makes me uncomfortable because the parents are so very like my own parents and everytime someone challenges them I fear for their safety because I know how my parents used to react in those situations. I love seeing these kids breaking free but I am incredibly uncomfortable watching it because I know how hard and emotionally traumatizing it is to break free of this kind of abuse and seeing it portrayed as family entertainment makes me sick.

[tvdas]

Political Scientist Claes Ryn in The American Conservative

The Declaration of Dr. Navid Keshavarz-Nia on the possibility and the certainty of fraud.  Caught with Their Hands in the Cookie Jar, by Jeremy Carl  The New York Times on Trump’s Campaign to Subvert the Election   https://www.regent.edu/misc/analyzing-american-election-integrity/ https://letsfixstuff.org/2021/10/how-the-2020-election-was-stolen/ Other sources are mentioned in this article:

Election Fraud — Reform This Thing by Tal Bachman 

The time has come to completely renovate America's presidential election voting process.

No, I'm not talking about the electoral college. That can stay. Nor does this have anything to do with Biden versus Trump per se (although the ongoing dispute and understandable doubt about who actually won helps support my contention).

All it has to do with is maintaining America's status as an actual representative democracy—a republic—whose citizens determine electoral outcomes by majority votes. Per Lincoln, that was the whole point, after all: government of the people, by the people, and for the people.

For that sort of government to exist in reality, and not just in rhetoric, you need elections whose results citizens can genuinely trust. They need to be legitimate, but also, need to be seen to be legitimate.

What that means is elections characterized by simplicity, intelligibility, uniformity, and voter anonymity, as well as overall transparency, formal and multi-layered scrutability, physical security at voting stations, and real-time and post hoc verifiability of vote counting.

Put all those things together into a system, and you have election integrity. Omit one or more of those things, and you have a system which begins sliding toward unacceptable levels of error and election-changing fraud. At the point where error or fraud produces false outcomes, or can no longer produce the requisite level of confidence in reported outcomes, the system becomes incompatible with representative democracy—meaning that any representative democracy which continues to use it, is ipso facto either degenerating into a non-democratic form of government, or has already completed that transition. That would be true regardless of surface appearances, or what citizens believed.

To put it more plainly, representative democracy requires legitimate elections. As Ol' Blue Eyes once claimed about love and marriage, you can't have one without the other.

You can guess where I'm going. America has done all sorts of things right, but—as Mark Steyn has pointed out many times over the years, most recently on Tucker Carlson Tonight shortly after the election—its presidential election process ain't one of them. It violates nearly all the requirements for electoral integrity and for inspiring confidence in itself. It's no wonder that, as you read this, the president of the United States, his entire legal team, and tens of millions of citizens, believe outcome-changing fraud occurred the night of November 3rd, 2020.

What I mean to say is that even if there wasn't any fraud at all, we'd all still have lots of reasons to suspect there was. That alone is completely unacceptable.

One reason for suspicion is at least one presidential election has been rigged before—election fraud in America is nothing new.

Other reasons include the hundreds upon hundreds of people convicted of voter fraud over the past two decades (virtually all of them Democrats), large-scale electoral dysfunction in other recent races, and even a recent detailed confession from a professional East Coast election-rigger.

But more relevant are the reports of misbehavior on election night: poll watchers barred, ballots re-dated, tens of thousands of votes of mysterious provenance suddenly appearing, improbable-to-the-point-of-impossible statistical anomalies and other oddities, etc., as well as questionable recount behavior.

But the most compelling reason of all is the amply documented vulnerability to manipulation of the computerized voting machines now used so commonly. To what extent these machines were in fact manipulated, in this recent election, I can't say; but again, even if they weren't manipulated at all, their mere existence necessarily casts doubt on the integrity of any reported electoral outcome. For that reason alone, they should be discarded.

Let me just list a few indications of how lousy these machines are.

The day before the election, USA Today investigative reporter Pat Beall published a zinger of a piece detailing a number of disturbing voting machine vulnerabilities. Entitled "Will Your Ballots Be Safe? Computer Experts Sound Warnings on America's Voting Machines", Beall's piece chronicles things like spontaneous vote-switching, the instant disappearance of tens of thousands of votes, and erratic vote registering. That was days before anyone heard Sidney Powell alleging the same things.

Beall's piece is not the only credible account of vulnerabilities in voting machines. The House Administration Committee issued a report in 2018 noting some of the same problems (and, interestingly, pointed to Georgia as one state most vulnerable to computer vote-rigging). A number of other such reports have emerged in recent years, including a 2018 New York Times piece reporting the discovery of voting machines manufactured by Election Systems and Software with remote-access software secretly pre-installed, and—as if that weren't alarming enough—that the machines had a history of reporting vote counts at odds with votes actually cast.

Not that this is new material. Evidence indicating the fraud-friendly nature of computerized voting machines has been out there a long time. As far back as 1974, the US General Accounting Office was warning of serious accuracy and security problems with America's new vote-counting computers. (As for possible vote-tampering culprits, the CIA at least had the decency to admit during the 1975 Church Committee hearings it regularly tampered with vote-counting machines in foreign elections). In 1985, New York Times reporter David Burnham, in an eyebrow-raising piece, reported that the National Security Agency had begun investigating reports of vote-manipulation in voting machines used by a full third of the American electorate.

By the late 1980s, the potential for manipulating computerized voting machines had become even more undeniable—and unnerving. In a magisterial 1988 New Yorker piece on the topic, journalist Ronnie Duggar wrote:

"Some officials concerned with elections think about the unthinkable in their field; namely, the stealing of a Presidential election by computer fraud in the vote-counting in metropolitan areas of key states. Steve White, the chief assistant attorney general of California, said to me last spring in Sacramento, 'It could be done relatively easily by somebody who didn't necessarily have to be all that sophisticated. Given the importance of the national election, sooner or later it will be attempted.'"

Journalist Jonathan Vankin was another early chronicler of electoral computer fraud (taking time to revisit the topic in a 2000 piece, in which he pointed out compelling evidence of serious computer-rigging in Miami-Dade, Dallas, Orange County, and several other locations). A book-length exposé even arrived in 1992 courtesy of James and Kenneth Collier.

And yet here we are, nearly a half century after that first US General Accounting Office warning, still using the same easily manipulable computer systems, which bad actors have almost certainly manipulated before to fix election outcomes; and partly as a result, we're all still wondering if Joe Biden really got 15 million more legitimate votes than Barack Obama did—a gap which must strain the credulity of even the most partisan Democrat (not that they'd mind illicit victory). (We're also now wondering how many of the presidents over the past thirty years won their elections fair and square).

So as I say, it's no wonder that now, half the country suspects fraud; it's because fraud on a huge scale, thanks to the voting machines, remains eminently possible.

As for how to reduce the possibility of voter fraud, the steps are simple. And it's not like they're secret. Nations around the world use them. A functional, trustworthy, election system of integrity would look something like this.

First, it's run by a single-purpose, rigorously impartial, devoutly transparent federal entity overseeing federal elections (about which more below).

Yes, I know we're all sick of the federal Leviathan. I know it already has far too much power. It's just that in this case, we don't have much choice, do we? We're going on well over a century of chronic Democrat Party presidential vote-rigging; and it appears they just ran one of their classic tricks again just a few weeks ago. At some point, pro-America voters have to stop making excuses for why they shouldn't try solutions to these nation-destroying problems, and just try them.

Yes, I know this would require a constitutional amendment. But let's assume for now we could get one of those passed.

Second: The new federal entity—let's call it Elections USA—would then divide the nation into voting districts of equal size for purposes of federal election (that could occur within pre-existing congressional districts). Elections USA would then further subdivide the voting districts into smaller units. Working with the postal service, Elections USA would then draw up a list of voters in each unit and designate a voting station for residents of that particular unit.

Third: In preparation for election day, Elections USA would send out flyers informing households of where to vote. The information would also be made available on the Elections USA website.

Fourth: On election day, voters travel to their designated voting stations: an elementary or high school, a union hall, a community center, whatever.

Each voting station is watched over by police or other security guards.

As voters approach, they join a quick-moving line. At the front, they present two pieces of government issued ID, at least one with a photo. A volunteer finds the voter on her list of voters for that unit. (If they've come to the wrong polling station, they are redirected to the right polling station).

The voter then approaches the voting station in a large, open room, where another volunteer hands him a paper ballot. Picking up the provided pencil, he marks the ballot behind a screen, folds the ballot, and drops into the voting box in full view of the poll clerk and attendant witnesses sitting a few feet away—typically, a few volunteers from political parties who act as "scrutineers", or official observers and verifiers. The voter then leaves. The entire process never takes more than fifteen minutes.

Once polls close, no one is allowed to enter or leave the premises until the vote count is completed.

The poll clerk—still in full view of the scrutineers—dumps the ballots on to a table and sorts them into piles according to the candidate/party voted for. She then counts the votes for each, showing them to the scrutineers as she goes. Once the votes are counted, a supervisor is called over to the table. After verifying that the scrutineers are satisfied with the counting, and resolving any lingering concerns, the supervisor signs off on the count, and the ballots are immediately placed in a special, sealed envelope. The sealed envelope is then stamped, and cannot be opened without subsequent detection.

The ballot count numbers are then phoned into Elections USA, right then and there, again in view of the scrutineers, who verify that the numbers called in match the numbers they witnessed during the count.

Once all the numbers are called in to Elections USA—a process which never takes more than two hours—the supervisor then physically transports the sealed envelopes (each marked with information like Voting Desk #4 at Poll Station #15) to the Elections USA depot, where she hands them over.

The sealed envelopes are then transported to Elections USA employees, who will then verify, and eventually formally certify, that all the numbers called in from each desk of each polling station of each voting district in the country matches the number of actual ballots. In the unlikely event any question arises about accuracy, the ballots can be accessed and counted again.

In a simple process like this, the media will have accurate election results within two hours of the polls closing, and there is virtually no opportunity for fraud. I can attest to that, because I myself have witnessed this exact process in real life quite a few times, and am friendly with several people who volunteer as election workers on election days. What I described is how elections are conducted in Canada, but not only in Canada: an identical or similar process is used in most other English-speaking countries. A few simple security protocols—not least of which is, no computerized voting machines—and your election is as fraud-proof as this mortal realm would ever allow.

When you compare this typical voting procedure to the morass of conflicting voting regulations representing fifty states, many of which—incredibly—do not even require that the voter present identification before voting, and which are being manipulated by the very state party hacks tasked with preventing fraud, you begin to see just how desperately America needs electoral reform. Credible stories of poll watchers being denied access, for example, in any normal country, would be regarded as completely unacceptable, to the point where the votes in that area would be likely thrown out as a matter of course. And yet, that type of chicanery is now so common in the United States, most people take for granted it goes on. That's how far the window of acceptable behavior has moved.

Lastly, I point out the outrageous absurdity of Democrats screaming for four years that Russia hacked the nation's vote-counting machines in 2016, only to suddenly demand—once their salaried goons in mainstream media prematurely declared Biden the victor—that we all instantly fully accept that no hacking or vote manipulation could ever have occurred in the 2020 election...when almost all the machines remained the same.

Trump's currently demanding recounts, and that's great. But America needs more than recounts. It needs something like a constitutional amendment federalizing the federal elections and banning voting machines. It also needs an exhaustive investigation—although by whom, I don't know anymore—to identify just which bad actors have been manipulating those easily manipulable voting machines for the last forty odd years. Given the frame-up jobs we've seen the last four years, I have a few hunches about the culprits—and I don't think they were Russians.

[dfnews]

Episode Recap of "A Baby Girl for Joe and Kendra". First aired August 4, 2020. Yes, it's still 2020.

No description was posted on TV Guide online for this episode so I see that as a bad omen for this recap. Warning! Boredom Alert!

1. In LA, Felicity is being introduced to the world of expensive toys and high-end baby fashion. Her cute outfit alone probably cost more than all the clothes bought for Jinger as a child in a five year period. Felicity's scooter scene is only used as an introduction for Jeremy to talk about his Christian skateboard given to him by a Christian skateboarder which is then used as a way for Jeremy to talk about his wild unChristian past and decision to start behaving himself after he aggressively and drunkenly grabbed a cop and got his ass arrested. Jeremy seems to be doing what Jim Bob failed to do. He's gotten his religious beliefs to be the center of the show and he'll nearly break a leg at the skatepark to do it.

2. Kendra's getting ready to pop out number 2. We've already seen the birth in a special episode so most of this is a repeat. The younger Duggar kids come over to Joe and Kendra's house to help clean but create more unChristian chaos than help. Jim Bob says with a smirk on his face that it's hard when the kids are little but when they get older they can help out with the other kids a lot. Yeah, we know. Jana is still there "helping out".

3. Hank gets a follow-up evaluation from a speech pathologist. Jessa and Ben claim to have been working with him and have taken away screen time. Hank performs well. Too much screen time, over use of pacifiers, and multiple young children can slow down speech sometimes but it was probably more of a genetic thing than anything else for Hank. Jim Bob admits to having some speech issues as a child but doesn't talk about his learning disability. Let's hope Hank doesn't pick up anything else from his grandpa. Poor kid has suffered enough.

4. Then the birth of Addison which is my favorite Duggar name ever. Too bad they seem to favor Addy over her full name. Pop those birth control pills because this one is intense. No pain meds, no doctor (late arrival), no common sense, and Kendra holding her breath until she nearly passes out. She eventually pops out the baby and all the germy relatives visit in the hospital room which makes me sad or maybe happy for Joy because her baby to come soon won't have that huge Duggar invasion at the hospital. Maybe she'll actually get some rest.

This episode has to rank up there in the top five of complete boringness. Too bad Jeremy didn't break something at the skatepark. Just a bit of his ego would do. After this episode was a birthing recap episode showing Michelle having her last five kids and then all her daughters and daughter-in-laws giving birth. If you watched that episode you are no longer fertile. Enjoy!

[nova-flashpan]

Nightshift at Bunker

It was unseasonably cold in Kings canyon that night. The chilled air bristled past, sweeping through the island with a mournful whistling wind that mingled with the rhythmic chorus of the syndicate grunts at work. Large flood lights pierced the darkness, casting strange, ominous shadows.

Bunker seemed to loom over Duger as he worked. He felt as though the structure and its mountain surroundings were peeking over his shoulder, silently judging his progress. His nerves began to manifest in his hands with a tremble that made his welding go off track, leaving a nasty scorch mark in the concrete. Doing a quick survey, he decided it was okay to calm himself the only way he knew how. He took one of the cigars from his pouch and lit it with the welding torch still ablaze.

“C’mon Duger, if you’re going to smoke that crap you could at least do it somewhere I don’t have to smell it.” Alex growled, smacking Duger upside the head.

Duger flinched and rubbed the back of his helmet on instinct, as if he had actually felt the impact. “I can’t help it man, I smoke when I’m nervous. This place gives me the Heebie-jeebies.”

Alex took a stack of energy ammo from his pack and began to restock the supply bin. He gave a mean chuckle. “You’re nervous, huh? Scared of the canyon at night? You should be, with the wildlife on the loose now you’re not on top of the food chain anymore. Some of those things would make a quick dinner out of a little pissant like you.” Alex punctuated his sentence by sealing the supply bin with a pneumatic hiss.

Duger felt bile rise in the back of his throat. I’m not cut out for this, he thought. He steadied himself against the rail and ignored Alex’s torment as much as he could, forcing himself to focus on the welding.

“Alex, quit your jabbering and go help them put in the doors up the hill. Duger, don’t screw up that weld, you know they like to have things put back into place carefully.” Clowa called from the cargo truck.

Alex gave a dutiful nod and hurried up the hill. Duger liked watching how fast he broke to authority. He might be a sadist, but he’s a sadist who can take orders. Duger finished his work quickly on that thought. better to work while the cats busy. As he stood up, he tried his best to rub the scorch mark out of the concrete with his boot.

“I know I just warned you to be careful, but you don’t have to be that anal about it. When we’re finished cleanup’s gonna come for the dried blood and stuff, they’ll buff it out for you.” Clowa said.

“Oh, uh thanks commander.” Duger said.

She rolled her eyes. “Loosen up kid, you’re on the night shift. Its supposed to be easy if you do it right.”

Duger gave a dutiful nod like Alex had done and moved to the next set of railing. Their work continued uninterrupted except for the occasional screech of a flyer or the ring of far off gunfire. Duger found it oddly comforting. Each pop was like a reminder to his fearful core that there wasn’t anything to worry about. They weren’t the prey in the canyon, they where the hunters.

“That’s the problem with the “work hard, play hard” Motto. Everyone gets on board with the play hard part, but when it comes to the work they flake out. Then the people who really work hard are stuck picking up all the slack.” Will said speaking in between mouthfuls of orange dusted chips.

He sat on the balcony’s edge dangling his legs over and swinging them like a child in the breeze. Garth squatted near him patching up a whole in the shack’s wall.

“Uh huh that’s a real shame.” Garth said.

“It’s more than a shame! It’s a Damned travesty is what it is. Hell, we would probably get done with our work in half the time if the slackers would pick up their feet a little.” Will said crumpling the bag and tossing it into the water below.

Duger walked over and plucked the bag from the water without thinking.

Garth turned. “You don’t have to do that Dug. Will’s a big boy and he should learn to pick up his own shit.” He said punching Will in the arm.

“It’s ok I don’t mind that much.” Duger said turning back embarrassed.

“Yeah see he don’t mind. He doesn’t complain he just gets the job done.” Will said with a shit eating grin.

“Willie you’re a prick, you Know that.” Garth said.

Their banter was cut short as a series of pops range behind the mountain. The workers stopped, they all noted how long the gunfire had gone on. It wasn’t unusual to hear a shot or two in quick succession, but this was continuing fire. Then came the long rips of fully automatic fire and the steady thumping of light machine guns. Duger jumped at the sound of a much bigger bang, the distinctive blast of a grenade.

Clowa growled and grabbed her radio. “What’s with the fireworks people? Is appropriate force a term you all forgot about?”

The radio was silent. She went down the bands switching from one to the next in quick succession. Each had a distinctive static click as it connected, but there was silence. No matter what she threatened the other end did not reply back. Half way through the list she paused as the radio connected right away. The little speaker projected the vrooming fire of a devotion on full blast and the screaming of a man on his last leg.

“This is commander Clowa report in! What’s the situation?” She yelled into the receiver, a sliver of fear leaking into her tone.

The devotion fire stopped as the magazine spent its last breath. There was a scream and the sound of crunching armor and bone. Then a static hiss as the signal was lost. Clowa stared at the radio wondering if she had really just heard the end of a whole platoon. Her thoughts were interrupted as another signal connected and the panicked voice of Alex picked up.

“The lights are going out! Somethings coming!”

Clowa turned to see it with her own eyes. The lights of artillery flickered and then where snuffed. The dark flood spread, and containment was swallowed into the inky blackness as well. The light glow that had appeared around the mountain went out with a mechanical clank as the floodlights on the other side went out.

The grunts moved quickly without orders, it was clear that the shit had hit the fan, and no one was going to sit around and wait to be told to gear up. Will made a beeline for the closed container ditching his issued rifle for the devotion that sat inside. Duger followed suit picking up a peacekeeper and adding attachments that he could find in the restocking stash. The momentum of the work stopped the terror from fully sinking in, so he rode it like a wave.

Clowa worked through their ranks checking their weapons and dolling out attachments and grenades. They were scared but she couldn’t allow chaos to go unchecked. Better to act as if she still had everything in hand, give them a foundation to work from. She held her face plain and hoped they couldn’t see the nervous twitch in her eye. She had them form around the bunker’s entrance, creating a fallback if things escalated.

“Alex do you have confirmation on the enemy? What are we fighting here?” Clowa asked in a hushed tone into the radio.

“No, we’ve had limited visual contact. I can’t Identify who, but they’re individuals in Black armor. They’re blending into the dark, using the shadows to hide. I think they might be special ops or something.” Alex said.

Clowa’s brow furrowed. She had thought it was wildlife at first, an invasion of the more aggressive outland species. That bone crunching, she had heard made more sense for animals. She shivered at the thought of the kind of person who would do that.

“Hold your position and give me any updates on their movement. I’m gonna call the Calvary in for this.” She said.

Clowa entered the syndicate main line and tried to connect. She only heard static. She could feel the eyes of the grunts on her, their hope resting on her like the weight of a sinking ship. I need to keep control, need to keep everyone together, she thought. She sent an outbound signal.

“This is commander Clowa of the 19th restocking crew requesting immediate evac. We have hostiles surrounding us. Over.”

There was static and then a different sound, not quite breathing, but the idle fidgeting of another presence. She knew someone or something had heard her. She pressed the button to speak again when a growling metallic “No” pierced through the static.

Clowa did a double take. did I really just here that? She thought. No, surely it was a trick of the static. Her mind finding a voice amongst the white noise. It felt real though. She tried to resend the signal only to find that the radio was no longer working. That “No” had meant it.

The grunts turned to hill as screams and gunfire sang from the top. Duggar felt his intestines pretzel themselves in his gut as he recognized one of the voices of agony. In his lower moments he had wondered what it would be like to hear Alex scream in pain. He knew now and wished he never had.

“Fall back Fall back!” Clowa screamed the last of nerves giving way.

The soldiers flooded into the narrow passageways of bunker. Clowa waited at the entrance for a moment, hoping to see a few of her men escape from the hilltop. She was instead met with a wave of dark armored soldiers running and leaping with inhuman speed. Clowa was able to close the doors just in time as the wave crashed into bunker.

The men leapt back as the swarm continued to batter against the door. Sending body after body crashing against the plated steel. The slamming slowed and finally stopped as the swarm realized it could not push into the structure. The mass of soldiers stood still now, as if they, or it, were thinking.

“Alex?” Duger whispered as he peered through the bullet proof glass.

Alex was there at the forefront his armor and skin turned an ashen black. His eyes gave an eerie glow and he wore a wide snarling smile that was anything but friendly. He noticed that they were all Grunts, all fellow soldiers. He recognized many of them. They had been his colleges, some had even been his friends.

The swarm took a collective step back and two separated from its ranks and stepped forward. They grabbed both halves off the door and began to push opposite directions. At first there was nothing. Then another pair joined and then another. And the door began to make a creaking sound as the lock began to break.

“Hold the door!” Clowa yelled as she braced one of the sides trying to stop its movement.

The other men rushed in and pushed along side her. Duger stood there being and feeling completely helpless. The eyes of the shadow men outside seemed to lock on his every time he looked.

“Duger God dammit help us!” Will shouted.

Duger snapped out of it and grabbed his welding torch. He set the torch to its highest setting praying that it was hot enough for the reinforced material. The weld was sloppy, but it held fusing the two halves of the door together.

Will clapped him on the shoulder as they stepped back. “I knew yah had it in you little guy.”

The others joined in whooping and cheering, taking the little victory in stride. Clowa didn’t join them, she stood at the door still wrestling with a feeling that there was something else off. As she scanned the now still swarm it came to her.

“Weren’t there more of them?” She asked.

Her question was answered by a shrieking crash from further in the facility. Hearts sank and stomachs dropped as they remembered the other entrance. It may have been locked, but that wasn’t enough anymore.

They were overtaken in moments. The narrow hallways gave them a slight advantage, but there was no beating their sheer numbers. As the fighting went on the lights where knocked out and the canyon sat in complete darkness.

Duger was the last man standing. He had torn the devotion from Will’s cold dead hands and was now blasting away. The lasers where the only source of light. The Blue blots of plasma seemed almost holy to him and he could not help but chuckle, wondering if that’s why it had been given that name.

Then the clip ran dry and he was in the godless dark. He shrank back into the corner slipping in someone else’s blood. He should have died as soon as the clip ran out, but instead he was left with the cruel fate of waiting for death hopelessly. He wept there in the dark, wishing they would just do it. He knew they were still there, he could hear them ripping apart armor and breaking bones.

Then just before madness fully grasped him, he felt a cold metal hand grab his face in the darkness. Suddenly he feared death again, for some reason he felt that death by this hand would be worse somehow. He began to sputter pleading for his life between racking sobs.

There was a deep metallic voice that spoke calmly and coolly, though he felt an immeasurable anger deep in its tones.

“Why do you cry little meat sack? Are you afraid I’m going to hurt you? I could never, not too something as pitiful as you. No. no. There’s no sport in that.”

Duger’s crying slowed. Maybe he had been wrong about the dark. It was ok. He was going to be ok. The voice wouldn’t hurt him, and everything would be alright. The metal hand left his face.

“I certainly wouldn’t hurt you.” The voice reassured, then it gave a sinister chuckle. “However, I can’t speak for them.”

They swarmed him now Striking and tearing. The last thing he heard as he left the mortal coil was the clank of metal feet. The metal hands picked through the remains of Clowa in the dark and wrapped around a control key card.

“Now the reel fun can begin.”

(This was written as a sort of prelude to the new apex legends Halloween event. I’m sure there will be an in game explanation for how the game mode happens, but I thought it would be fun to do something on the spookier side.)

[totallyrobophobic]

This may sound extremely stupid, but I find it odd that the Duggars are OK with letting the kids wear braces. In their Growing Up Duggar book, the girls talk about how we should appreciate the body that God gave us (ex: using make-up in moderation). So, it surprises me that they wear braces. Don’t get me wrong, I 1000% support the use of braces. I am so thankful I had them, because I seriously looked crazy before I got them. I guess I’m just curious of their thought process of getting them.

It’s all about attractiveness, or more specifically a certain idea of attractiveness. Sure, they warn against heavy makeup, but they still do things to enhance their appearance to make themselves more attractive to men. Otherwise they wouldn’t wear makeup at all.

It’s the same reason why they used to perm their hair - Gothard liked curly hair so he told his cult members that it was the Godly way to do your hair. It’s not about pleasing God. It’s about pleasing men.

(note: I am fully aware that you can wear makeup for yourself and not for men, but if someone were to follow the logic that they should appreciate the body God gave them, then shouldn’t they keep their faces bare?)