You know there’s a line in ep 1 of the sickening during shilo’s intro that’s something like ‘i don’t know how those two get along, he’s a monster’ that’s from one of the guards to another guard abt shilo and Lazarus that I always took as meaning that Lazarus is seen as a monster but. The other interpretation is very interesting to think abt! Another guard later pretty much begs shilo not to talk to him bc otherwise he’d be ‘marked for death’ and how no one who talks to shilo lasts longer than a day and I’m just like.
Do you think the guards warn each other. Do they say not to talk to the prince, no matter how sweet and innocent it seems, because doing so will doom you? The guards have to have some kind of community, some kind of camaraderie. Enough to earn each other on how to not get killed, at the very least. But the first guard shilo gets killed is new and hasn’t talked to the other guard very much. The second guard is less willing to talk to shilo but he ends up doing so, of course he does. And the third one at that point fully believes his actions are of his own free will.
I think what part of makes shilo so compelling to me is how he is in no way malicious with his actions. He doesn’t want to kill these guards or get these guards killed, he isn’t doing it out of hatred or enjoyment or even boredom. He just. Does not see them as anything more then things to talk to sometimes and use in his escape attempts. They get replaced quick enough. But from an outside perspective? Of course he’d seem monstrous. Even amongst a whole castle full of monsters, a young, mysterious prince who has never been outside the castle walls, who is rumored to doom anyone he talks to, all while seeming so sweet and innocent, so out of the norm in vampire society? A prince who can easily manipulate your actions and thoughts and will do so without a second thought not because he is intending to use you but because he genuinely doesn’t see anything wrong with it?
Of course that seems like a monster. Of course you’d wonder how others could bear to talk to him when it could so easily doom them. Mark them for death. like-a day? they barely even last a day.
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I taught my dad how to take photos of the sky with his phone and we were standing outside till 1 am because he wouldn't stop taking pictures of every corner he could see lol
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I always forget how people back in the olde days used to just die so easily from the flu, until I get the flu myself dhhdhdhf because on one hand I know our medicine is just soo much better now a days but on the other hand I have the immune system of a dead man and once I get sick I'm like the ye olde victorian child on a death bed dhdhdhhd it's been 4 days and I just NOW can get on my phone to watch videos and text, and eat and drink water, and coherently string words together and do more than just lay in bed and moan in pain, and sweat and cough in sick delirium 😭
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bonerattle arena fucks severely. i was not expecting it to rival my love for jammin' salmon junction, but wow. this map feels like a love letter to people who love and enjoy salmon run. (i ended up playing the rotation for around 3.5 hours... which you can watch here if you like!)
the map's circular shape on normal/high tide effectively makes the spawns from this map come from every angle. it's a test of awareness and movement skill- and the walls + inkrails really, really make rotating around the map feel so fluid and easy.
and low tide's hexagonal two-ring design is so fascinating too! instead of testing movement, it tests your team's ability to make judgment calls on luring and making sure you don't overwhelm basket from luring too much.
i also feel that every special in salmon feels really rewarding to use on this map- even reefslider! i've played enough to see that most specials bring so much utility and value, and i just love that no special feels like it's "useless" on this map.
there's also a few flyfish tech on this map that echoes the bomb tricks on jammin' salmon junction and spawning grounds (and i guess gone fission too), it feels really intuitive on what spots can pop two baskets at once (it's the grates and the rails) and i just? feel really rewarded for playing as much salmon as i do.
i feel that the map's inclusion of the ink rail mechanic evokes a lot of similar vibes to ruins of ark polaris- and i really liked that! there's definitely some things i want to fine tune and understand better about them, but they're really fun.
i still need to see how other weapons feel on this map, but it feels like both mobile and stationary weapons can exceed here- there's nice perches for long range weapons, lots of walls for quick weapons to use to escape situations... it's so swag...! a very good final map, i think!
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also hewwo i’ve vaguely returned to fic writing thanks to engage and as part of getting better at promoting my work uuhhh here (throws breadcrumbs in one convenient post)
All the following center around M!Alear/Alcryst (alearyst? alcrear? Alal? the utterly unhinged suggestion of alal-) because oops My Favorite Dynamic, generally written as standalone
Rutilated- 3.7k, taking place between chapters 14-15, slight focus on events in chapters 10-11. Insomnia from stress turned awkward flirting turned emotional comforting.
Intergrowth- A series of 6 drabbles totaling 2.5k that take place from chapter 7 through post-game in sporadic leaps. Covers a broad spectrum of crushing angst to fluff, arranged chronologically kind of like an outline of the relationship on the side of the main plot, built around the idea of moments where they held hands
Thanatophobia- 1.3k, post-game. Alear has a nightmare because (kiragi vc) war is heck! especially when you’re dragon jesus and go through protagonist bullshit that people somehow expect you to be just Okay With.
so yeah oops finally found fic topics to latch on to and remembered I might dare have a writing following/finding people who want to read over this way so if u find this post rad or interesting please have at it and enjoy!
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This week needs to end I can't do this anymore I want to take myself time no more exams no more work no more physics I just want to draw some things and read some books and watch some series oh and going to park with my friends for picnic weather is beautiful this week.
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