#jrwi riptide incorrect quotes

[nwleon]

Chip: Would you take a bullet for me?

Gillion, smiles: In a heartbeat

Jay kicks open the door, her finger on the trigger

Jay: Where is he?! That mother fucker!!

[incorrection-quotation]

Chip: Do you think I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?

Gillion: You are a hazard to society in both land and sea.

Jay: And a coward. Do 20.

[i-have-dots-in-my-brain]

Astarion: *shaking Gale awake at 3am*

Astarion: Time is ever marching forward and your mortal days are running out. Every second that goes by is a second lost.

Gale: …should I be worried?

Astarion: time is an fucking illusion, Darling, the only thing truly real is death.

Gale: go back to bed.

Astarion: what truly comes after death?

Gale: …I’m not emotionally or mentally stable enough for this, go ask Withers.

[jrwiincorrectquotes]

Jay: I am at a loss for words!

Chip: Despite being at a loss for words, Jay yelled at me for the next 15 minutes

[daily-riptide-incorrectquotes]

Gillion: What's the signal when something goes wrong?

Chip: We yell, 'oh shit.'

Jay: ...That'll work.

[buniven]

Riptide incorrect quotes

from ScatterPatter's incorrect quotes generator

Chip: I told Gillion his ears flush when they lie. Jay: Why? Chip: Look. Chip: Hey Gillion! Do you love us? Gillion, covering their ears: No. Jay:

~~~~~~~~~~

Jay: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me Gillion: Okay, but in my defense, Chip bet me 50 cents I couldn’t drink all that shampoo. Jay: That’s not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!

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Gillion: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste Jay: We got spring water Gillion: NO. Chip: with EXTRA minerals Jay: it's like licking a stalagmite Gillion: DON'T COME HOME. Chip: Mmmmm cave water

~~~~~~~~~~

Chip: Gillion and I don’t use pet names. Jay: I see. Hey, what do bees make? Chip: Honey? Gillion: Yes, dear? Chip: Jay: Don't ever lie to my face again.

~~~~~~~~~~

Jay: We need a distraction. Chip: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises? Gillion, whispering: My time has come

~~~~~~~~~~

Jay: WHY. why did you give Gillion a KNIFE?! Chip: I’m sorry. He said he felt unsafe. Jay: Now I feel unsafe! Chip: I’m sorry. Chip: … would you like a knife?

~~~~~~~~~~

Gillion: You have to apologize to Jay Chip: Fine. Chip: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

~~~~~~~~~~

Jay: What do you think Gillion will do for a distraction? Chip: They’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do. Building explodes and several car alarms go off Chip: … or they could do that.

~~~~~~~~~~

Chip: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million gold? Jay: You stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house. Gillion: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 million. Jay: Good thinking.

~~~~~~~~~~

Chip: Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night. Jay: You were flirting with Gillion. Chip: So what? They're my partner. Jay: You asked them if they were single. Chip: Jay: And then you cried when they said they weren't.

~~~~~~~~~~

Chip: I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it Jay: Just rip the bandage off. Chip: It’s Gillion. Jay: Put the bandage back on.

~~~~~~~~~~

Jay: Naturally, we are on the cutting edge of technology. Chip, amazed: Wow… Gillion, to Chip: Well what does that mean? Chip: I don't know. Chip, to Jay: What does that mean?

~~~~~~~~~~

Jay: Why are you on the floor? Chip: I'm depressed. Chip: Also I was stabbed, can you get Gillion, please.

~~~~~~~~~~

[The group is a prison cell that was just hit by an earthquake] Jay: Uh, I'm gonna roll a perception check of… 4, and see if our cell is, uh, in any way damaged by this quake Grizzly: You're in a prison cell :) Gillion: You did great. Well, I got a 10- Grizzly: You're in a prison cell with bars on it :3 Chip: I got a 1! Grizzly: You're in… a cube-shaped place.

[s0lar-ch3ri]

a fun thing i like is making jrwi character say shit their players did in different unrelated videos, examples being:

clorten: all in the backrooms is just almond water, its been about 5 years since ive seen my father (charlies "We Made the Backrooms HILARIOUS…" video at around 23:50 i believe)

gillion, in a car: im finna whip this hoe (crashes) (again a charlie video, i am a terrible babysitter, jsut look up whos your daddy on his channel, one of my favorite videos)

chip (or connor, both work): can i say fuck when we do roblox or no (second door vid on charlies channel)

connor, out of his mind: its the wheel man ITS THE WHEEL MAN ITS THE WHEEL MAN (again doors, charlies channel)

ryan, on call with the j-crew as theyre wondering where he is (the j-crew or aster and connor, probs aster and connor cause thats where hed be able to be calm lol): my house doesnt have any doors i got rid of them

gillion: how do you think they kept those fucking pre-edit-tors out? thats right- jay, early campaign in the nightmare arc: guns. (okay a lot of these are from the doors vid, including these and the last one, but im just rewatching shit aight?)

connor, again on something: OOH OOH THE BACON MAN (same as the others, ik, i jsut like rewaching this one video)

aster for some reason: DESTROY THEM OBAMA (finnaly a dif video, this is the scu hardest minecraft difficulty)

aster: i may have been the boy who cried for the wolf, but I WILL NOT BE THE BOY WHO CRIED FOR YOU (she would not say this, but this scu line must be acknowledged yes its still the hardest difficulty we abrreviating to hmd)

(OKAY NOT ONE I CAN USE FOR ASTER BECAUSE IT GOES TOO GOD DAMN HARD AND CHARLIE IS MYHTBORNES DM BUT "you like puns, dont cha? LEMME PICK-AXE YA THIS!" IS A HARD AF LINE)

jay, whos been possessed by chip (possibly literal i think thats funny enoguh for him) to an unsuspecting gillion: TREES ARE EVIL AND DECIPLES OF SATAN (condis "STOP PUTTING TRESS IN VIDEO GAMES" is a must watch btw, thats where the line comes from)

when im blessed with more visions ill update

just realised i can make characters say anything i want, jay ferin signs her letters to chip with "love you babes xoxo" because im british trash and found it funny

[nwleon]

They are going to send that poor woman back to the hospital at this rate

Ella, Lizzie and Gillion art by Renrooked on Twitter. Ollie art by Shanruaru on Twitter

[incorrection-quotation]

[Chip dramatically dying]: I don't know, it's like there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

Jay: It's hellfire, Chip. Turn around.

[clovercow8228]

don't ask me what happened to the picture of gillion. compressed

[jrwiincorrectquotes]

Chip: You’re a warrior! It’s in your blood!

Gillion: that’s racist

Chip: Your soul!

Gillion: that’s racist

Chip: your eyes?

Gillion: thats gay?

Chip: thats homophobic

Gillion: that’s triton

Chip: That’s racist!

[daily-riptide-incorrectquotes]

Jay: Is anyone going to tell me what's going on in here?!

Gillion: It's kind of complicated, but Chip-

Jay: Got it. Forget I asked.

[livelaughleefromtheteashop]

(Zuko after getting injured doing something stupid)

Sokka: Maybe Zuko instead texted the group chat at three am and said “I think I’m gonna super glue it closed!”

Zuko: It made sense in my head!

[darealsaltysam]

ok ok fuck it incorrect jrwi quotes

using that one generator as always

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Anyone being “saved” by the Albatrio: My life is in the hands of an idiot! Chip, motioning to himself, Jay and Gillion: No no no no no, THREE idiots!

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Jay: Can I be frank with you guys? Chip: Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help. Gillion: Can I still be Gillion? Ollie: Shh, let Frank speak.

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*Jay and Lizzie skipping stones on lake*

Jay: It’s such a beautiful evening! Lizzie, whispering: Take that you fucking lake.

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(after episode 15)

Jay: You have to apologize to Gill. Chip: Fine. Chip: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

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Gillion: Edyn, I'm sad. Edyn: *Holds out arms for a hug* It’s going to be okay. Chip: Lizzie, I'm sad. Lizzie, nodding: mood.

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Jay: Can you please be serious for five minutes? Chip: My record is four, but I think I can do it.

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Chip, trying to be a ship captain for once: How did none of you hear what I just said? Drey: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours. Ollie: I got distracted halfway through! Gryffon: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

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Albatrio: How petty can you get? Niklaus: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

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*during episode 87*

Jay: So apparently the 'bad vibes' I’ve been feeling are actually severe psychological distress!

---

Lizzie, leaving her captain’s quarters: Hello, people who are not my crew. Chip: Sup. Gillion: Hi! Jay: Hey. Lizze: I told you to only come here during emergencies! Chip: We were out of snacks :(

[s0lar-ch3ri]

tryna write something on ao3, describing a scenario to my twin, and she has lizzie do a silly

Gillion: Caspian, you know a lot about the Oversea, do you have any idea how to court Chip so to speak?

Caspian: I might, but you know Lizzie and Chip consider each other close enough to be siblings. If you want, I could ask about what she thinks Chip likes.

Gillion: Well, maybe don't tell her who's asking...

Lizzie: I can hear both you fucks from here. If my brother somehow isn't dense enough to not notice you like him, he's probably trying to convince himself with anything that it's not possible.

what my twin had her say-

Lizzie: I can hear both you fucks from here. If my brother somehow isn't dense enough to not notice you like him, he's managed to anxiety himself into writing a book "101 Reasons Why Everyone You Know and Love is Lying to You and Pretending to Care."

[starsinoursystem]

Chip: This push pop bangin yo

Jay: That's a glue stick.