#just another tag to say I love Layne so fucking much

[nirvana-ok]

Alice in Chains’ self-titled “Tripod” album was released 28 years ago today. November 7th, 1995.

Featuring the singles “Grind”, “Heaven Beside You”, and “Again”, it was the third studio album released by the band and the final with Layne Staley ♥️

📸 Photo by Marty Temme, 1995

[awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands]

Laid out cold, now we're both alone (part 2)

A/N: Hello, this fic is very important to me because I tried my best to give justice to such a cool idea and I hope I did a good job. Plus I don't do multichapter ofter, so this was a challenge. 

I wanna thank the lovely @livdonna for proofreading my work, you're literally the best <3. 

P.S. If you want to get tagged in the next chapters, let me know.

Summary: Nikki visits Mick to give him a very important task.

Warnings: Major Character Death,Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Drug Use, Angst, Overdose.

Pairing: Nikki Sixx x Tommy Lee

Chapter 1

Taglist: @slashscowboyboots @witchytombstonesmile @arnold-layne @emometalhead​ @i-dont-like-rice​ @nikki-sexx​ @smokeandmirrorz​

Mick was supposed to not give a shit about Nikki. He and the stupid drummer had tormented him and his wife for months on ends, making the whole tour a living hell and he didn’t need to have even more things to worry about. So what if his bassist decided to get addicted to heroin? He was a fucking dumbass but it wasn’t his problem.  He would end up killing himself and it wasn’t like Mick could have done something, not when his whole body was torturing him.

The only problem was that he cared, deep down. He cared about the fucker and hearing the news that he was gone forever hit him.  He lost one of his friends and the band all together in a day, what would have happened? He hated to admit he was scared about the future, it was hard to imagine Motley Crue without Nikki.

He sighed, turning off yet another discussion about his death. They didn’t call him yet but something was telling him that they had to release a statement soon.  Doc was probably freaking out somewhere crying for all his millions of dollars lost.

“Fucking Nikki, you had to die at the worst moment, didn’t you?”

“Yeah… sorry about that, man” A voice incredibly similar to Nikki said, making Mick jump up.

Nikki didn’t feel anything, one moment they were in the ambulance and the other they were on the beach.  He was confused for a moment before he remembered that Mick had a beach house, and stared at it for a bit. He didn’t know much about the guitarist, maybe almost nothing but he respected him so much.  He was one of the strongest dudes he had ever met.

The weirdest thing about all of this was probably how he was only able to feel certain things, no cravings or sand under his feet as he was walking, yet he would still feel guilt, fear, love, worry… it didn’t make sense but he wasn’t in the mood to question the universe’s rules.

People can’t see you until you decide to show yourself. You have to remember or otherwise they can’t hear or see you.

The voice still freaked him out, but at the same time he was grateful for it to be there… it made him feel less alone, which was great considering how he felt lonely for his entire life.

“You’re not alone Nikki, I’ll always be there with you, through highs and lows”

“God it sounds like a marriage vow, T-Bone”

“Well if I could I’d marry now…”

He shook his head, trying to get the memory out.  It wasn’t the time to be sentimental and risk fucking everything up, so he walked ( more like flew) through the front door and found Mick sitting on the couch.

“Fucking Nikki, you had to die at the worst moment, didn’t you?”

“Yeah… sorry about that, man”. The bassist hoped that he was heard, otherwise it would have been pretty embarrassing.

Mick visibly jumped at hearing Nikki’s voice and quickly turned around to look at him.  From his widened eyes and confused expression, he knew he probably looked fucking transparent.

“Okay first of all why the hell are you here talking to me if you’re dead? Then why the fuck can I see myself through you ?”

The black haired man just realized that he had no idea how to explain everything and be believed, he just went along with whatever the voice in his head was saying, but now it was different. He fumbled with his hand and realized he couldn’t feel them, while he tried to come up with the best way to explain to his friend how he was a ghost and why he was there.

“I died… I have no idea how I came back but I have unfinished business and I need to talk to you!”

The guitarist looked at him up and down, clearly skeptical.  However, there wasn’t much arguing… Nikki’s ghost was literally standing in front of him.

“Okay I have no idea if this is a dream, I’m dead or in a coma, or simply I drank too much but now I’ll grab some vodka and you’ll spill your little secrets as you like”.

Nikki smiled a bit… He honestly felt normal for the first time since he was brought back.  Having Mick joking was so familiar, usually Tommy was the aim of his jokes and they all laughed because they were all so unexpected…

Tommy. Thinking about him still hurt, again he wondered if he was okay and how much he missed him… but it wasn’t his time now.  He had other things to talk about as Mick came back into the living room with his glass.

“Mick… you gotta promise me that you won’t let Motley Crue die, that you will fight to keep the band’s legacy.”

The older man looked at him surprised, rolling his eyes.

“Well that’s a bit hard when our bassist and songwriter died!”

Rage and resentment were heavy in his voice but there was more : fear and sadness. Nikki felt guilty and he fucking hated it, it was so unlike him but he couldn’t help it… Mick cared about the band as much as he did.  He always said the band was his life, before heroin came into the picture, but it was also Mick’s and he probably destroyed everything.

“You will find another one, another bassist who is also a songwriter…” The words felt so foreign coming from his mouth.  They even hurt a bit but they were necessary.

“I know you care about this band as much as I do, Mick. I know how much you’ve worked your ass off in shitty bands, trying to find the one that was going to break… I might be dead but Crue can’t have the same fate”.

Mick scoffed, taking a long sip of his vodka.

“It’s not easy, it’s not like we can find the perfect match like we did. Plus, everyone will probably hate him for replacing you!”

The frustration was almost tangible, but there was something else… Mick was scared, he knew everything was about to fade away because of Nikki’s actions, he was already looking at the boat sinking. Nikki started to panic because his band had to live, even in his death! It was pointless and selfish but that was the only thing people could remind him of.

“If you give up, then Vince and Tommy will do the same! I know that you think no one will take you, but the truth is they will. Crue is what it is because of our vision, you are part of it and I’m asking you to keep it going. Think of this as my dying man’s wish… even if I’m already dead”

The older man’s grip on his glass got tighter, his eyes lost in thought as he was pondering Nikki’s words. It was hard to take in, hell that was an understatement, it was fucking insane and probably wouldn’t work but the bassist needed to have this false hope.

“It’s so fucking weird, you know? To realize you’re fucking dead yet here talking to me.”

He was deflecting, Nikki knew it, but didn’t want to push it too far. He learned to know Mick, he kept his promises and he was a hard worker and with a good dose of luck and jokes, you got him to your side.

“Yeah, do you remember how I said you weren’t going to make it in that interview? Well, karma hits like a bitch!”

“Mick might not make it , he drinks a little too much and it looks rough” Mick quoted, trying to imitate Nikki’s voice.

“Yeah and then you said something like I heard what you said and you’re dead, fuck I guess you were right” He laughed but Mick didn’t.

Oh c’mon so what if he was joking about his death? It’s not like anyone really cared about him.  They just saw him as a burden, which he was. Not his mom, nor his band or his Tommy would have really missed him… they would eventually move on.

“You’re a fucking idiot.” He said annoyed but his lips formed a small smile.

“I know, I know. Mick… please promise me that. If Crue is going to end, then my whole life didn’t mean anything! Ple…” He stopped himself, he was so fucking close to begging but he couldn’t. Nikki Sixx didn’t fucking beg, not in life or death.

“I’m thinking about it!”

He really meant the first part. He spent all his teenage and adult years creating the band of his dreams and making sure they conquered the world.  This band was his escape; his attempt at redemption after his shitty childhood. Nobody loved Frank Feranna but he didn’t care, he would become Nikki Sixx and be super fucking famous!

He didn’t need anyone’s love, except that he did.

“ I love you, Nikki.”

“ No you don’t, nobody does, T-Bone”

“Well I fucking do. You gotta pass on my dead body before you’ll hear me not saying it over and over”

His heart might have stopped, but he still felt the big wave of nostalgia hitting him. He couldn’t do it, he would have never been ready to see him again.

“Okay, I will. But listen to me, it won’t be easy and I’m an old man with a fucked up back, so don’t send demons against me if I fail!” The little spark of determination in his eyes relaxed Nikki, he was on board.

“I fucking knew you were the best, Mars! If I wasn’t dead I’d probably tattoo your face on me as a thank you!”

“Oh gross, never say that again!” He pretended to be disgusted but his eyes betrayed him, the small softness in them told Nikki he felt touched.

“Who knows, maybe in hell they have tattoos for the ghosts. God we used to hate each other and now we are two peas in a pod.”

“I still hate you.”

“Ugh, you crushed my heart Mick”

The guitarist flipped him off, rolling his eyes. Nikki desperately wanted to keep talking, if he did then he could have pretended nothing changed, right? He didn’t have to face Vince and Tommy and go through the light… everything would have stayed the same or he could fool himself that it would.

I think it’s time to go to the next person.

The voice was demanding yet still calm. Nikki knew that he couldn’t stay forever, they had to prevent spirits from just lingering into the real world like that, it made him a bit angry but he understood it. It wasn’t like he could have done much anyway…He was just a shell of what he used to be.

“I gotta go Mick…” He wanted to punch himself because he sounded so fucking pathetic, but the other man gave him a compassionate smile.

What he fuck are you, a little small puppy? Oh look Frankie is scared to leave his illusion of a family.

Mick walked him to the other without saying anything, but before turning the handle, which was pointless because Nikki could have just passed through the door, he broke the silence.

“Try to give us some signs, okay? Show us that you’re there… but don’t you fucking dare spill my vodka or I’ll make you two times dead!”

“Oh that’s exactly what I’ll do, thanks for the suggestion!”

He stepped outside and looked at Mick one last time.

“You promised, alien. You gotta do it!”

“Yeah yeah, you better repay me when I come to join you there…” And with one last look, Mick closed the door.

Nikki felt all of the weight crushing down on his body, even if it was made of air. He simply stood still, his mind racing like a freight train, trying to take everything in but also getting ready for his next move… being overwhelmed was an understatement, he felt peeled down like an orange and this was only the beginning. He felt like a fucking coward but he just wanted to get over it, was it that bad to accept his fate and disappear without facing anyone?

You are going to abandon him again? You know why you need to talk to Vince, and you know this will be your last chance to see him, asshole!

He went to kick the sand, but he couldn’t touch it. God, how frustrating was that!

So where are we going next?

Nikki would have wanted to scream at him, give him the middle finger and just run away but it wouldn’t have been helpful, would it? So he forced himself to be as neutral as possible.

“Vince Neil. Take me to his house.”

[saint-gerard-of-arc]

I'm a fucking wreck rn I haven't been sleeping for a week and I'm getting some rest from the bullshit factory that is my brain only now, but I just wanted to say that last year for me has been saved by tumblr and all the friends I made along the way.

Before you go below the cut, a special thanks goes to the Bee Movie Anon, who, rightfully, I can't tag so I have to say it here in the hope that they'll see it. Your hunger for chaos made me feel a lot of emotions, and I'd have never in any time or space thought that the Bee Movie would be such a prominent part of my life as it is now thanks (read it with a note of sarcasm) to you. Thank you for providing us an infinite amount of both entertainment and suffering, hell, some of the friends I made were because of YOU. I'm still not sure what was your drive to go and start this absurd crusade for the bee movie in the 80s metal fandom, but I don't know, I don't think bee so, I'm not gonna question your ways.

@arnold-layne being the first in line, you kept me sane somehow in the first phases of quarantine and dedicated a lot your time to talk with me and helped me enormously with creativity. If it wasn't for you, that Cyberpunk Comic That Is Kinda Inspired By The Crüe and Shout At The Devil would've been already down the drain. I would've given up probably, because I didn't know how to exted the concept and have an actual plot. A dream that I've been having for literal years wouldn't even have such cool characters with a rich storyline if it wasn't for you. I know I kinda left it after a month or so of intense brainstorming with you, I was literally drained at that point both physically and mentally, but oh boy I haven't forgot about the characters that WE created. How could I after all? Russ being the wreck of a tormented junkie protagonist that he is, Dylan the happy-go-lucky fuck up that seems to do nothing right but with the best intentions, Frankie the runaway sassy and wary androgynous teenager whose gender is a mystery even to themselves, and the epitome of the found family trope, ex gov agent part Japanese, part Russian, part cyborg Vik, whose story isn't still clear yet but we'll give him a very good one, eventually.

You gave me the curiosity to read fanfiction again after literally NINE YEARS of being distant from that part of the fandom and honestly I don't regret it one bit. In fact, I discovered literally my favorite writer in fanfiction. That is you, Arnold. I don't care how frequently you write, I don't care if sometimes you can't do your best. I'll always be there waiting for the next chapter and I'll always think that your art is sublime. I'll have to admit, I don't read your works as often as I should. But it's because I love them so much that I want to always save for later. It's like a drug, or a delicious cake that you want it to last as long as possible so you can enjoy it for much longer (I should be reading your fic more often either way tho like, at least so I can make more art for it. I'll make sure to change that this year and give you the recognition you deserve 🖤).

Everytime I make art, everytime I make a post, I always wait for your name to pop in my notifs. And fuck if I'm happy when I see it, and I rush to read your tags and it always makes my day. Like seriously, you mean so much to me and I admire how you can still be any amount of sane with all you're going through. You're strong as hell, keep going. 🖤

@i-dont-like-rice dude, how can I explain it. You're my best bud here. You're my chaotic sibling from another mother. The other braindead I share the single braincell I have with. The Nikki to my Tommy. Or the Tommy to my Nikki, I'm still not sure which of us is which (I guess I'm Nikki and you're Tommy? lmao it's ironic how even them are an italian and a balkanian) but you get the point. Every interaction we have, I laugh my ass off till my whole body hurts every time. I think I worried my mother and annoyed my sister at least a couple times for bursting out laughing for five minutes straight out of the blue, especially if it was late at night, and all the times, I swear it was because of you. You are as chaotic as you are kind, and it's always so disarming to see you worry or take care of others when you are definitely in a worse situation. Please, be more selfish, goddammit. For your own sake. And be more confident of your art. Draw shit and post it. Who cares if it's not perfect and you hate it and you don't want anybody to see it, it's tumblr, nobody will ever reblog it or give you the well deserved recognition anyway! So it's worth a try isn't it?

@no-stone-no-bone seriously, I'm so glad I met you. You're like the third element of chaos that holds me and Andi together. All three of us are literally unstoppable. You're extremely sweet too and I wish you the best, and DON'T HIDE SHIT IN THE TAGS GODDAMMIT 😂

@white-lightning-625 @viiinceneil I know we really haven't talked much, and we met through unfortunate times, but I'm so glad that something good came out of the chaos and drama, which is being able to talk to you and getting to know you both better. And the fics. My god, the fics. Frankie, I already told you this but MY GOD. I still find it incredible that I've read a fic about a band I didn't even know what they looked or sounded like and I was HOOKED from start to finish. And Katie, I should definitely read more of your works because I love what you've got going on. You're both very sweet and talented with a very distinct, beautiful way of writing and I can't wait to sink my teeth into the pulp of your work, because I know that by now I only scratched the surface.

@awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands Bruh, conoscere una fan su tumblr the parla la MIA STESSA LINGUA (e che ha pure il mio stesso vero nome lmao cosa sta succedendo)??? Che concetto innovativo!!! Le nostre conversazioni sono sempre disgiunte, ma non importa, adoro ogni nostra interazione. Sei seriamente una delle persone più dolci e gentili che abbia mai conosciuto. La tua creatività stimola sempre la mia. Le tue moodboard sono sempre 👌👌👌 e ogni volta trovo sempre qualcosa che sì, ci avevo pensato, ma mai nel modo in cui lo poni tu, e di solito sono una persona che resta vicina alle proprie idee, ma tu riesci a farmi alterare prospettiva, e trovo questo meccanismo mentale molto affascinante. Ti ricordi lo swapped instruments AU, con Tommy come cantante, no? Giuro che è un concetto a cui penso ancora dopo mesi. Spero di avere la capacità mentale per tradurre quell'idea in arte il prima possibile, perché cazzo, lo adoro troppo

@tattooed-lies thank you for providing the fandom the best gifs in the fucking platform and thank you for giving us the vinikki content that everyone, even if they're not aware, deserves and needs. Thank you for being the only Vince stan that I know. Thank you for being the sweetest person alive 💖

@nbtommylee honestly, I wish I was cool like you. Your sense of humor is impeccable, much like your critical thinking. I have never read something from you that wasn't a valid point. You don't talk shit and that's extremely sexy of you, y'know? And having a "gender dysphoria buddy" to be jealous of our Rockstar Gender Of Choice with is always fun to have, so that's definitely a plus. Can't wait to see (and read!) more of your art, I just love your style so much and you deserve to be Known

@metalmelkor @emometalhead @polka-dot-duff I'm always so happy to see you in my notifs and y'all are oh so very sweet and cool, we haven't talked much but I love every interaction we have, sorry for having the social skills of a stale piece of white bread 🖤

A special thanks goes to @awesomgrlgr8job bc you're literally one of my very first mutuals since I made the decision to make this dumpster fire of a blog and holy shit it's crazy to think about that. I don't even know if we ever interacted that much but it's always such a joy to see you around, ily and I hope you're doing well and thanks for putting up with my clownery for so long 💖

Like seriously, thank you all. I don't even know where I would be without you. Here's to another year of chaos, but only of the good kind 💖

[mother-love-stone]

I was tagged by @whitedeadflower and @thenonatapes to answer the following questions, thank you 💕💕

1: What are you wearing? Underwear and an oversized t-shirt

2: Ever been in love? Unfortunately, yes

3: Ever had a terrible breakup? No.

4: How tall are you? 171 or 172 cm

5: How much do you weigh? 61 kg

6: Any tattoos do you want? Yesss, lately I’m seriously thinking of getting the symbol of Hakuna Matata somwhere on my hand to constantly remind myself to stop stressing out and enjoy life

7: Any piercings that you want? Not really.

8: OTP? Please excuse my ignorance, but I don’t even know what that means.

9: Favorite show? Supernatural, The Umbrella Academy, What we do in the shadows are some of the best ones I’ve watched.

10: Favorite band? Oh, this is a hard question, because my god, I’m all over the place musically, but I would say that Alice in Chains is my favourite band, even though I haven’t listened to them in months. It’s one of those bands that stick with me, and every time I hear one of their songs I’m like “yeah, that is my favourite band”

11: Something you miss? HIGHSCHOOL.

12: Favorite song? It changes a lot, but right now it’s Anthem by Greta van Fleet

13: How old are you? 19

14: Zodiac sign? Capricorn

15: Hair color? I dyed it red again yesterday.

16: Favorite quote? “Just remember, no matter how bad things get, they will always get better, unless they get worse” - I saw this one on an Instagram meme page, idk the author, but it’s so simple and obvious, and somehow comforting

17: Favorite singer? Chris Cornell, Layne Staley, Serj and Daron, Matt Bellamy

18: Favorite color? Green

19: Loud music or soft? Both, depending of my mood

20: Where do you go when you’re sad? Phisically, in a place where I can be alone so I can calm myself down and cry in peace. Mentally, I try to distract myself and not think about what makes me sad, I usually make up different universes in my head, like sometimes I think about how cool it would be if I were some kind of witch that can timetravel, but everytime I travel in time, another alternate universe gets created so I don't mess up the timeline.

21: How long does it take you to shower? 20 to 40 minutes

22: How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? About an hour

23: Ever been in a physical fight? Nope, I'm a peaceful person

24: Turn on? Great sense of humour, a person who doesn't take things too seriously, originality and a great, well-defined personality

25: Turn off? A person that says they like food and sleep as personality traits, no communication skills, close-minded people

26: The reason I joined TUMBLR? Because I saw lots of screenshots of the supernatural fandom being everywhere and being hilarious and I wanted to be a part of that lmao.

27: Fears? My biggest fear is the unstoppable passing of time, whatever you do, you can't take back the TIME, and it's scary as fuck to me that every day we are closer to the end of something.

28: Last thing that made you cry? That I'm going to start college really soon and it terrifies me.

29: Last time you cried? Three days ago for a few hours actually, it wasn't pretty...

30: Meaning behind your url? I love Stone Gossard and Mother Love Bone.

31: Last book you read? Ok, I'm gonna say it, I'm not a big book person. I don't know, reading a whole book is just stressing me out, I never do it to relax, I do it because I have to, for school, for example. I was never a big book person, and I was always embarassed by that, because reading books as a hobby was very romanticised among my former friend group when I was younger and it made me feel stupid.

32: Last song you listened to? White room by Cream. That song is a masterpiece.

33: Last show you watched? Umbrella Academy last month.

34: Last person you talked to? My mom.

35: The relationship between you and the person you last texted? He's a very good friend of mine, we are making plans to go on a really nice hill to see the sunset and the whole city with the squad.

36: Favorite food? Pizza.

37: Place you want to visit? Everywhere, the whole world, every country has beautiful places.

38: Last place you were? The living room

39: Do you have a crush? I don't even know anymore

40: Last time you kissed someone? I can't even remember, romantic relationships are not a priority for me right now. They never have been, honestly

41: Last time you were insulted and what was it? My friends call me a crazy old lady all the time, but it's in a loving way, so I don't know if it counts

42: What color underwear are you wearing? It has blue, yellow and white strips

43: What color shirt are you wearing? Blue

44: What color bottoms are you wearing? Are you talking about shoes? If so, then no color because I'm not wearing any

45: Wearing any bracelets? None atm

46: Last sport you played? I have no idea, I'm not a very sporty person

47: Last song you sang? Teenage dirtbag by Wheatus, I always go karaoke mode whenever I hear it

48: Last prank call you remember doing? Elementary school?

49: Last time you hung out with anyone? Met up outside with some friends yesterday, don't worry, we are very careful with Covid

50: Favorite movie? I don't know, I have several movies that I like, but I don't know if I would call them my favourite movie of all time. One that I recently watched and stuck with me because of the message was Swiss Army Man.

Thanks for the tag and sorry it took so long to actually do it

I'll tag @noezppl @mvickym @spreadthecurse @punk-rock-sunflowerr only if you want to, no pressure❤❤❤

[fan-with-issues]

New Haircut (Axl Rose x Sebastian Bach x Jon Bon Jovi)

Tags: @rock-em-sock-em-rock-n-roll @sodalitefully @slashscowboyboots @arnold-layne @youre-in-the-jungle-baby @duffshairdye @awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands @maxwell-marittimo @motherfucker-oftheyear

~

Jon ran his fingers through his freshly cut hair, admiring his new look. 

"You like it?" The barber asked as she watched Jon toy with his hair a little bit more.

"Oh yeah, thank you so much again!" 

"No problem, Hun. Rose and Bach will be all over you once they see how good looking you are! Oh, who am I kidding, you look good either way." She said, chuckling at the end.

He laughed at her as he got up and paid, The barber wishing Jon a good day and good luck as he walked out the door.

Jon walked over to Richie's car, knocking on the window and getting in as he heard the door click.

"So, how was your- WOW!" Richie shouted mid sentence. 

"What do you think?" Jon asked, Richie didn't answer as he reached out to feel Jon's hair. 

"I'm gonna have to get used to this. David, Tico, and Alec are gonna trip their asses when they see your hair. I still can't believe you actually cut it." Richie said, Jon slowly removed Richie's hand from his hair. 

"Eh, I felt like I needed a new look, you know?" Jon said. He always thought about cutting his long hair, he never thought he'd actually do it, hell, even he was gonna have to get used to his new look.

"Whatever you say, man." Richie sighed out as he started the car, driving to Jon's house he shared with his two boyfriends.

As they got closer Richie started to notice Jon get more fidgety as they edged closer to his place, it's not until he parked into his driveway that he asked his best friend what was wrong. 

"Alright, Bongiovi. Tell me what's the matter." Richie asked, Jon sighed deeply. 

"It's just, what if they don't like it? What if-" 

"I'm gonna stop you there before you even start, my friend. Jon, listen, just because you look different now doesn't mean their love is gonna change as well. They'll still gonna love the same way and if they don't, well, let's just say they've got four New Jersey motherfuckers to deal with." Richie said, making his hand into a fist at the end. Jon smiled at his friend as he brought him in for a hug.

"Thanks, Rich. You're the best." 

"I know, but can you please let go now? Your hair is tickling my nostrils." Richie said, Jon apologized as he let go of his guitarist.

"Are you sure they'll like my haircut?"

"Jon, if I wasn't in a relationship, I would've fucked you in the backseat the minute you came in here." 

Jon blushed at Richie's comment and punched him in the shoulders lightly.

"You're unbearable sometimes, you know that right?" Jon chuckled out.

"I know, it's a gift of mine. Now, are you gonna get out or are we gonna sit here and talk about how I'd rip your-" Before Richie could finish his sentence Jon was already out of the car and heading to the door, flipping him off while walking.

Jon walked in to the house, hanging his jacket on the coat rack and making his way inside.

"Babes, I'm home!" Jon shouted.

"We're in the kitchen!" He heard Axl shouted back, he took a deep breath as he entered the kitchen. 

He entered the kitchen, seeing both Axl and Sebastian sitting on the counter, Axl drinking coffee while Sebastian looked like he was scribbled something down on a notebook.

"Hey, doll how was your- HOLY SHIT!" Sebastian shouted mid sentence, Axl looked up and instantly spit his coffee out.

"You cut your hair?!" They both said in unison, Jon nodded as he ran his fingers through his newly cut hair.

"Yeah, you guys like it?" He asked, they both were silent before Sebastian spoke up.

"Who's hair am I supposed to grab when I'm getting a blowjob from a certain Bongiovi now?!" He cried out, Axl patted Sebastian's back in comfort.

"It's gonna take awhile for us to adjust to it," Axl said, bringing him closer to his chest, "you do look fucking hot though." Jon blushed at Axl's words. 

"You really think so?" Jon asked, Axl nodded as he picked Jon's neck, biting it lightly which made him moan a little.

"Oh yeah, in fact, why don't we show you how much we appreciate it?" Sebastian said, separating the two from each other as he grabbed Jon's hand and lead him to their shared bedroom, Axl following close behind.

~

Jon whimpered as Axl licked up the rest of the cum from his body as his back was against Sebastian's bare chest, said man laying light kisses on his lovemarked neck, even making new ones on the spots that weren't covered. 

Fuck, was this gonna be a pain in the ass to cover tomorrow. 

"Hope we didn't go too far with you." Sebastian said, finishing off his last marking on Jon's skin. Jon shook his head.

"You didn't. It was perfect, actually." Jon cooed, leaning his head back to kiss his long haired blonde boyfriend. 

"I'm personally offended that I'm being left out right now, and I thought you guys loved me." Axl said in fake offense, Sebastian rolled his eyes at him while Jon laughed.

"Well, sorry, it looked like you were busy down there." Sebastian implied. Axl flipped him off as he scotched upwards, making himself comfortable on Jon's chest, Jon immediately racking his hand through the redhead's hair almost out of instincts. 

The three lovers stayed silent for a moment, enjoying each others touch as they relaxed into one another. 

"I love you, guys." Jon purred out. Both Axl and Sebastian looked at him fondly. 

"We love you too, Bongiovi." They both said, right before they dozed off.

Jon looked at both of his two boyfriends, smiling before joining them in sleep also.

~

"Should we wake them up?" Rachel asked, looking at the three men who were sleeping peacefully. 

"Nah, just leave them. They look peaceful, especially Axl, which is rare as hell if you're in a band with him." Duff said, putting a blanket over them for comfort but also to cover up their naked bodies.

"You're right. We'll just stop by later when they're awake… and fully clothed." Rachel said, making his way towards the door. Duff followed soon after,but not before snapping a picture of them and closing the door behind them.

[kingsofeverything]

11/11/11

@chloehl10 @ham-palpert @reminiscingintherain​ @realitybetterthanfiction​ and @laynefaire​ tagged me in this. Thanks y’all! I’m sorry I’m such a slack ass and it’s been weeeeeeks since I drafted this half finished, soooooooooo....

 I’m going to combine and put everything under a cut.

The first 11 are from @chloehl10

1. What’s your favourite fic you’ve ever written, and why?

Don’t Want Shelter because it’s the first fic I put emotional effort into. That universe, that Harry and Louis, all of it are very vivid and alive in my head. I love them.

2. Pick three words that you think describe your works overall.

Long ass sentences 👀

3. How long does it take you to write a fic?

Depends. Writing doesn’t usually take me long but editing does.

4. What’s the hardest thing about writing?

Realizing that I’m probably never going to write some of the ideas I have

5. Do you listen to music or anything while you write? What’s normal for you when you write?

I don’t usually, but sometimes. Idk that I have a normal. I really prefer to be alone and quiet.

6. How do you come up with titles for your fics?

Songs usually. Sometimes they just come to me though.

7. What’s one piece of advice you’d give to a new writer?

Get a beta. But not just a beta. Get someone who can talk fic/plot/story with you as well.

8.  How important do you think tags are when you are publishing a fic?

Very in some ways, no at all in others. I tag mainly for readers so they know enough about the fic to decide whether or not to read. I don’t tag specific sex stuff usually though every now and then I’ll throw in ‘anal fingering’ just to mix it up. I don’t tag who tops/bottoms. I do tag with fic reccers in mind thanks to B’s @nottooldforthisship instructions!

9. Do you write for fests/exchanges? If so, do you enjoy them? If not, why not?!

I have and I do but not often. I like running them and I have done exchanges in the past but it’s not really my thing to write for them. Is that weird? I feel like it is but ehhh

10. Which work of yours are you most proud of and why?

An Unbalanced Force aka marold harold because.... idk

11. What’s next for you?

Currently working on a short pwp hiccup fic

These 11 are from @ham-palpert

1. Have you ever been burned by a WIP that never updated?  If so, describe that traumatic experience.

I have not! But more in a ehhhh I’m not too bothered way. I’ve definitely read WIPs that weren’t completed but idk I guess I love on quickly lol

2.  Speaking of WIPs, do you like writing (or reading) them?  Why or why not?

I don’t write them. As in even my fics that have been posted as WIPs (DWS and HFL) we’re completely finished aside from some editing before I started posting. I change too much when I write. That padlock in TSHU? Thought of it at the end and went back to add it to the beginning.

I will sometimes read a WIP but not often. Mainly because I don’t remember anything between updates

3.  Are you a dialogue person?  An inner-monologue person?  A heavily descriptive scene-setter?  

I think I’m gonna pass? I literally have no idea. I don’t think I heavily describe scenes but I guess that depends on the scene? This is when I send for help and ask Nic

4.  Is there a scene from a fic you’ve read that you wished you’d written/thought of first?

Not really

5.  Would you rather read a 150k angsty fic, or a 10k fluffy one-shot?

10k one shot

6.  Do you enjoy writing smut scenes?  Does it make you feel super awkward?  Do you need to have a cigarette afterwards?

Sometimes smut scenes are fun to write. Especially if there’s something different about it. Sometimes I have to be in the mood. Sometimes I feel like I need to shower after lolll

7.  Do you click through the recently updated list on AO3 or read exclusively fic recs? Or a bit of both?   

Neither. I don’t read nearly as much as I used to. I’m nowhere near caught up on Big Bang.

8.  How many words, on average, do you write a week?  Do you try to stick to writing goals?  

Oh wow. Idk! I could actually figure it out since I track my words per day. When I’m steadily writing, I’d say 10k a week is average? Probably more tbh

9.  Are you someone who comments on the fics you read (and liked)?

Yes

10.  Of all the fics you’ve written, which one came to you the easiest?

marold harold I think

11.  If you had to live in one of the AUs you created, which one would it be?

Marold harold and I’d be Kate McKinnon

these 11 are from @reminiscingintherain​ 

1. Has your writing changed now from the way it was when you started? If so, how? 

yeah definitely. more plot heavy and just better overall

2. Does anyone IRL know about your writing? If so, have they read it? 

yes, but no one’s read any of it. i almost sent tshu to my therapist lol

3. Is there anything you’ve written that you wish you hadn’t? 

no

4. Do you have a set location or setting that you have to write in? A favourite cafe? The only seat that’s comfortable?

no, i will write literally anywhere. on my phone or laptop. i like writing on my back porch when it’s not a million degrees outside 

5. What are you working on? If you can (i.e., it’s not on anon!), share five lines!

5 lines from the hiccup fic: 

When he opens his mouth to answer, Louis hiccups and flattens his hand against his chest, shaking his head. He points to his mouth, hiccups again, then again, snaps his mouth shut and pushes past Harry, who turns and follows him out of the club to the relative quiet of the street.

“You can stay, Harry.” Louis shoves his hands in the pockets of his faded jeans and turns to glance at Harry, who’s walking beside him. He hiccups and groans, kicking his foot out and stomping. “Fuck me, man. This sucks.”

6. Have you ever written something for a fic, but ended up removing a whole scene in its entirety and using it for something else?

i think so but tbh i can’t remember lol

7. Are you a linear writer? Or can you write scenes out of order and put them together at the end?

i’m a linear writer, but i will skip over parts of a scene like....... i’ll write a bunch of dialogue with nothing around it and fill in later

8. Betas/Britpickers… opinions?

always always always. i would literally not write if i couldn’t have a beta lol

9. How much do/can you write on average at any given time?

huh idk. i’m a fast writer, but i’d say like probably 1.5k a day is average for me?

10. How organised are you? Do you have lists and/or spreadsheets, or do you just wing it?

i’m the worst lol i tried to organize my google docs and that lasted like a week

11. What made you start writing? 

i was bored and i thought hmmmm wonder if i could write a fic. turns out i could!

alrighty these 11 are from layne :D

1. What is your favorite trope to write? To read?

EXES/ENEMIES TO LOVERS

2. What other fandoms do you write in/have you written in?

not a one

3. What’s one fic idea you want to read, but would never write?

i honestly don’t know because i write what i want to read

4. When do you do most of your writing - morning, afternoon, night? Which time of day do you find most productive?

i think i’m most productive in the morning, but i write when i find the time

5. Writing routine? What do you drink? Do you have a go to snack?

i don’t have a routine. i usually drink water or coffee, but occasionally vodka, wine, or beer. i don’t snack while i write but now i want to

6. Have you ever been writing something and had to get up and walk away from it? What was it and why did you have to step away?

i had to walk away from tshu because it was stressing me out that i couldn’t invent time travel irl so i wrote heading for limbo for a few weeks and went back to it lol

7. What is your most favorite scene you’ve ever written?

oooooooooooooooooooooh oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh this is such a good question and i hate it lol i absolutely HATE picking favorites of anything but i’ll say that the scene from tshu when louis shows zayn his tattoo and everything right before and after that

8.  Have you ever had an ending to a story, but couldn’t figure out how to start it? I don’t mean the typical -And they lived happily ever after - but a fully fleshed out ending with your usual writing pair, but you had no idea where to start? Did you ever write it?

nooooooope

9. What is the oddest thing you’ve ever drawn inspiration from?  

idk i think being stuck in a hurricane with no power turning into don’t want shelter was pretty odd

10. You’ve accepted a prompt to write a fic using a Whitesnake song for the title. Which song do you choose, and what is your fic’s summary?

here i go again - 70s trucker au (i’m not summarizing because i’m actually planning to write this one, though the title with be different. probably.)

11. Your most recent fic is being made into a movie. What would you change your main characters’ names to and who would you fancast to play them?

ok so i’m cheating here by picking tshu instead of my most recent fic because my most recent fic is canon pwp lol and i’m sorry but i’m so lame with actors and stuff idk anyone who’d play them. and idk about names either! SORRY LAYNE

last but not least!

these 11 are from @realitybetterthanfiction​

1. What made you realize you wanted to start writing fan fiction?

we were hanging at my parents’ house during a hurricane when they had power and we didn’t, and i was bored af and i think nic had just recently published her first fic and i was like....... huh i wonder if i can do that?

2. What fic changed you as a reader or a writer?

nic’s 5 times fic called fire and ice! i remember reading it and thinking WOOHOO PWP!!!! and then crying because she snuck all these FEELINGS in. so it made me think about writing in a different way, i guess. it can be fun and emo lol

3. What is your best writer’s block buster?

idk. haven’t really tried anything.

4. What’s the last non fan fiction book you’ve read?

uhhhhhhhhhhhhh a book about physics and space science (fic research lmaoooooooooooooooo)

5. If you had or have skills like our talented artists in the fandom, what’s one scene you would like to illustrate? (Can be your own work or another’s work)

THE JUGGLING SCENE FROM STRANDED IN A DREAM

6. What’s the best piece of writing advice you’ve ever gotten?

just keep writing! you can edit later! 

7. What’s one genre you’re hesitant to write but really want to explore?

idk i don’t think i have one? maybe aliens?

8. Would you ever cowrite with someone else? And if you have, how to you divide the work?

nic and i are trying BUT IT’S HARD AND WE DON’T KNOW WHAT WE’RE DOING 

9. Do friends outside the fandom know you write? Are they supportive? (I hope they are!!!)

no but my husband does and is

10. What is your favorite fic Niall? (give me all the Niall!)

niall and his churros!!!!! 

11. What is your favorite supernatural category (examples, vampires, ABO, werewolves, angels, aliens). And can you give a girl some recs?

vampires!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i don’t have any recs because my faves are old and everyone knows them: madalynn_bohemia’s vampire series

[subdivisi0ns]

tagged by the lovely @britneyshakespeare to answer these 10 questions & come up with 10 of my own. thank you !! 💗

psa i wrote way too much please don’t read this. just skip to the questions at the end if i tagged you

1. What are 3 songs that mean something to you, and what do they mean?

that’s hard because i don’t usually find personal meanings in songs. i’m a lot more interested in what the song means to the artist who wrote it. but let’s see if i can think of some

-um. after all by david bowie was always Highly Relatable. like. prattling on & on waxing philosophical only to suddenly realize everything i said is wrong and don’t hate me and also now i’m having an existential crisis and i shouldn’t have started talking in the first place? M e

-when i was first getting into rush i was a big fan of Self Isolating To Cope and also i had no friends and was proud of it (bc if i couldn’t find a way to take pride in my [perceivedly] unchangeable flaws my entire self image would come crashing to the ground and that just wasn’t a good time . anyway). so the lines “nothing can survive in a vacuum / no one can exist all alone” from turn the page pissed me off. but now! now i have loads of friends and i feel legitimately cared about and i feel like i can comfortably reciprocate that and now when i hear that song i think you know what neil? you’re goddamn right.

-uh i s’pose i relate to another brick in the wall pt 3 which is not a good thing but. i dunno i really love being angrily in denial of needing any help whatsoever along to this song. it’s my flaw-pride anthem (don’t worry i don’t take it literally. it’s just fun in the moment)

-shit i know this said three but the one person who i relate to EVERY FUCKING SONG he’s ever put out is bill wurtz. never have i felt so understood than when i listen to bill wurtz’s music. god it’s the most uncanny feeling, i really really understand it a lot

ok i have to stop thinking of more . turns out a lot have meaning to me ive spent like an hour on this question alone Moving On

2. What’s your ideal self like?

. this was The Worst question to ask me because i can and will ramble on for hours given the opportunity

well i’d be able to execute my ideas, for one. instead of just having a half-baked - quarter-baked - fleeting concept with no real idea of how to achieve it. more specifically i want to be able to write songs. more more specifically i want to be able to write the music aspect of songs. i can’t do it. i dont fuckin know why i just can’t. but if i could i think i just might be content with life.

but that doesn’t mean there aren’t still things to improve. i wish i was funnier. i like my weird brand of humor/abstractity online but that’s hard to replicate in real life. i wish i was better at thinking on the spot. i wish my memory didn’t only retain stuff when it feels like it. i wish i was better at putting my thoughts into words, more concisely and accurately and effectively.

um i wish i didnt have executive function issues. like i wanna just do stuff and not have it take all the energy out of me. wish i had the energy to do it to begin with. wish i could keep up with socializing and not ignore people for hours/days because i can’t get myself to maintain conversation.

ok clearly this is leading down an endless tunnel of what i’d change so . i’ll just say my ideal self is a successful musician with a good social life but also an element of mystery and intrigue. my ideal self is just david bowie

3. Who, of all your family members (immediate or extended), do you think has had the most influence on you, for better or for worse?

my mom for a lot (a looooooot) of reasons but if i go into it this is gonna push it over the line from a tag game into a therapy session (if i havent crossed that line already)

4. What’s your main outlet of expression?

writing. journalling. fuckin , social media. actually yeah that more than anything. my Self is on display here if you look at my tumblr(s) my twitter(s) and my instagram(s) you’ve got a pretty goddamn decent picture of who i am

5. What was the first album you ever bought for yourself?

uh i mean i listen to most stuff off of youtube if i don’t already have it so like,,? i dunno. does itunes count? the first vinyl i ever got was wish you were here (for forty fuckin bucks god) but i paid with my aunt’s money so does that even count. i don’t know.

6. Do you like to go shopping?

depends on a lot of things. lately i’ve been in the mood to just get out of the damn house whenever possible (love being a high school dropout !) so the answer is pretty much yes anytime. but it really depends.

7. Kind of cliche but, if you could have dinner with any person, living or dead, who would you pick?

i wanna be the fourth person at the dinner with rush table. just to observe. i’d be terrified to actually have a conversation with any of my idols. okay but if i had to get over that fear i guess i’d pick..... bowie? todd? i don’t know this is hard. alex lifeson circa 197something so he can take me back to his place afterwards you pickin up what im puttin down

8. What TV show do you watch when you’re feeling stressed or low and you need a quick feel-better fix?

i don’t watch tv like ever not even in this case but i guess full house

9. What was the last intriguing conversation you had about?

everything my girlfriend said to me today (edit: yesterday but i did this last night) was great everything my girlfriend’s ever said to me was great

oh that didn’t answer the question at all i just realized. uh they were telling me about the star wars prequels (which i have not seen) and earlier we were having a very analytical conversation about a particularly interesting rush photo

also me & @swanky-trash were discussing our plans to take down trump and all the rest of those bastards while wearing jareth from labyrinth costumes and eating mushrooms. because it’s our destiny as clones separated at birth. yknow just life stuff

10. What’s something about yourself that you don’t think comes across as painfully obvious online, but is, in fact, in person?

shit are we at the end already? damn. i was enjoying this (can you tell).

okay here’s another one i could go on for 12 years about. but uh. i probably come across as way more perky irl? like my voice is all high pitched and i talk really fast and smile and laugh at everything and i have a whatever the opposite of monotone is voice. i don’t like that. i try to combat it online with the all-lowercase typing and shortening of words and omission of punctuation and that sort of thing. i think it’s worked. also i may be terrible at typing but i am WAY worse at speaking. i’m scatterbrained as hell and if i seem at all interesting or witty online that all goes to shit irl. also i can’t fucking talk to people who i only know in person? it just doesn’t work. thank god i have you guys

haaaa okay sorry for the rambling here are the questions

1. what’s the best day/one of the best days you’ve ever had?

2. how important is your social media presence to you?

3. what achievement are you proudest of?

4. describe your sense of humor.

5. is there anything you’re good at or like to do that people who don’t know you well probably wouldn’t expect?

6. what’s your most interesting family story?

7. favorite color palette?

8. what’s something that would be very “out of character” for you to do?

9. yknow that thing on twitter that’s like “pick 1 & rt for good luck” and the options are good grades, meet your idol, money, or crush texts you? which one would/did you pick and why?

10. what’s a song you either wish you’d written or feel like you could’ve written?

i tag @thetemplesofrush @thumbnailoak3 @swanky-trash @lavender-layne @realalexlifeson @davies-jones @goallines-and-musicrhymes @fruitthemed @graveyarding @cosmikdebris99 and anyone else who wants to do it and dont feel pressured to do it etc etc god i hope none of you actually read this whole thing i am so sorry

[4birds-of-a-feather]

Chapter 25 - Here we are now, entertain us [part 6]

Birds Of a Feather

(In the previous chapters: the girls had a fight after Layla's decision to go visit WC Boyfriend, the Mookie guys have opened for Alice In Chains, McCready introduced Sara and Layla to Cornell and Cameron; now the Alice guys are about to go on stage... what’s going to happen?)

At that point the small group split for different reasons: Dave led Sara to the bar, determined to buy her a drink as some kind of reward for destroying that asshole who talked shit about him and his girlfriend, while Elias tagged along with Mike McCready, who was hoping to score another round. Soon after that, Cornell spotted Susan coming out from the backstage and instantly dropped his arm from Layla’s shoulders. “I guess the guys are about to start, see you later! Oh, and it was very nice to meet you, Miss Layla” he gave a quick kiss on the girl’s hand, excused himself and left to meet his girlfriend. “He’s very charming” she said after he left, smiling at Stone, who in response looked in the distance to give the umpteenth nasty look to McCready, that was already sitting at the bar. “He’s also very married” Eddie added sharply, making Stone’s and everyone’s head turn at the same time. “Really?” she asked surprised. “Yeah, didn’t you see the ring?” he pointed out at his own ring finger. “Uhm, not really… I saw he had a few but I didn’t notice the wedding ring” Layla shrugged and took a sip of her beer. “Eddie’s a very good observer, aren’t you? You’re especially good at keeping certain situations under control” Stone said with a smirk. “I didn’t need to notice that, he told me he got married a few months ago, so I already knew” “Don’t make Chris look like an asshole, though! He wasn’t tricking you, Layla, he’s just… he’s flirty, that’s the way he is” Matt chimed in to defend the singer. “Soooo, the conclusion is: sorry Layla, not a snowball’s chance with that guy!” Jeff giggled, patting her on her shoulder. “Heeey, what’s with all this fuss? It’s not like I said I was interested, hehe, I was just acknowledging his charming ways, that’s all. I know he wasn’t flirting on me” she dismissed with another shrug. <Of course he was just being flirty because that's the way it is, he wasn't hitting on me for real... Nobody does. Eddie only did because he was wasted and Elias because he's a fucking weirdo obsessed with boobs. Nobody really gives a fuck about me here...> Layla told herself, while Jeff started clearing his voice. “Cough, cough! Ehm, sour grapes, ehm ehm” he said, eyeing both Layla’s and Eddie’s fed up faces, and the girl ended up smiling and jokingly pushing him away. “Shut up or I will move out from your apartment” she threatened. “Ahahahah! And why the fu-” “I’ll move out alone, leaving my dear friend Sara with you” Layla completed her sentence and laughed at the look of horror on the bassist’s face.

Not just Jeff, but the whole gang went silent when commotion from the crowd was heard and the lights on the audience went out, whereas the stage lit up. The host talked on the mic, mentioning that the proceeds of the concert were going to a benefit fundation and the guys of the band were already on stage. He then made sure everybody’d drive safe in the snow storm that had been hitting Seattle in those days and went on to introduce the band as Columbia recording artists Alice in Chains. “Finally!” Matt exclaimed “How long is it since we left the stage?” he wondered aloud, looking at his watch. “It’s like we’ve been waiting for hours” Layla remarked as she was jumping in place and stretching a little. “I’d say for days” Eddie corrected and cautiously smiled at the girl, as if he wanted to check if she was upset for his previous comments on Cornell or not. “Seriously, it felt like years to me, I’m going upfront!” this said, Jeff ran and disappeared into the crowd, soon followed by Matt. “Well, good luck!” Stone smirked shaking his head, then suddenly realized he was left alone with the couple that wasn’t an actual couple “Errr, I’ll go on in the crowd and take a look anyway, what about you?” “I’ll stay here for now” Layla said as Man In The Box started playing. “I’ll stay here too” Eddie confirmed, Stone gave him a thumbs up and left. The two of them were enjoying the beginning of the show, bobbing their heads to the music without talking, but casually stealing glances at each other from time to time. Layla was intrigued by Ed but still couldn’t understand him. Sometimes he was warm and tender with her, sometimes he was cold as ice, sometimes he got all protective towards her (it even looked like he was jealous), sometimes he blatantly let her know he had no interest in her. <But what if it's all in my head? What if all these mixed signals are just something I made up because I felt lonely and abandoned by David? Maybe he's simply being a friend and I'm just projecting my idea of the perfect boyfriend on him because he's gentle and sweet andhe’s here> Layla thought during Cantrell’s solo. That made sense to her and would also explain why she got so mad at Eddie for getting in the way between David and her during that infamous phone call: she idealized Ed and couldn’t accept he made a mistake.

The first song ended and the crowd cheered. Eddie and Layla finally turned to look at each other at the same time and they both couldn’t help smiling; he got so many things to tell her but, at the same time, he had no idea how to do that. Being at a loud rock concert there really wasn’t a choice and he took it as an excuse to not saying anything. Finally, the singer decided to break the silence during the short break between songs. “Are you mad at me?” he asked while they were still smiling at each other. “What?” Layla turned serious all of a sudden. “I’m sorry for what I said before, I didn’t mean to sound harsh or anything… I mean, it wasn’t a lecture or a warning, I just told you he’s married because… because…” Eddie seemed to struggle finding the words and he knew he had zero time before the band would start playing the next song. “… Because he is” Layla continued his sentence. “Yes, because he is. And I didn’t want you to maybe find out later and be disappointed or something and-” “I’m not mad at you, Eddie.” she shook her head “And I wasn’t disappointed” <And what does it mean? That she didn't delude herself thanks to what I told her? That she wasn't into Chris in the first place so there was nothing to be disappointed about? That she wasn't disappointed by me since I acted as a good friend?> Eddie was considering saying something but the music started once again. “Ooooh, I love this song! Let’s go ahead a little” Layla took his hand and literally dragged him towards the front.

In the meantime, Sara was trying to do the same with Mike, Dave and Elias and drag them away from the bar. She managed to convince the drummer, but McCready insisted he had a perfect view of the stage from there and held on to his drink, while her coworker had no intention to walk away from the hot barista with the pierced tongue. “An alcoholic and a perv, what a nice couple you are!” she shook her head and addressed Krusen “Fuck ‘em, I wanna go front row, ok?” “I’m in!” he cheered and the two made their way through the crowd – quite easily, after all – ending up rather quickly in front of the stage, right when the third song ended. Sara was standing exactly in front of Layne as he was addressing the crowd, when she felt someone tapping fingers on her shoulders. “Hey, could you go back? You’re blocking my view and your beanie is too distracting” Stone basically yelled at her face as she turned around. “How did you get here so fast, Gossrad? Did you use your bass player as a battering ram?” “What else are bass players for anyway? I could have made it even faster if I used your head, though” he retorted and the girl stuck her tongue out at him. Jeff appeared right behind Stone’s back when Love, Hate, Love started and Sara abruptly turned around and huffed as she cursed her rotten luck. She moved towards the left as she took off her hat – it was too hot – and immediately made eye contact with Starr on stage, who immediately winked at her (she didn’t really notice that because of the lights). <Well, it's not Lanegan but I'll just settle for this now> she thought as she enjoyed the show and exchanged looks with Mike from time to time. These interactions didn’t go unnoticed to Jeff, who was kind of shocked when he found himself staring at the girl and his colleague on stage alternatively. “FUCK, THIS IS MY FAVORITE!” some girl suddenly screamed into his ear and he recognized her immediately. He turned around to see Layla and Eddie jumping around as another song started and, looking closer, he noticed they were holding hands. Jeff snorted and tried to focus back on the music. <If she's half a bitch as her friend, poor you! But you can't say I didn't warn you, Ed> In the meantime, Sara spotted her friend with Ed too as she talked into his ear, he nodded and in a second she was sitting on the singer’s shoulders. <I seriously underestimated his strentgh: he's not that weak if he can carry a beanpole like El> she pondered. Layla took a good look around, then raised her hands in the air and not so slowly leaned back until she felt people’s hands underneath her; she finally detatched herself from Eddie, spread her arms out and started crowd surfing. Vedder kept an eye on her during the whole ride with a huge smile on his face and Sara forgot for a minute that he was her worst enemy’s best friend, realized that he and her roommate really looked happy together and thought that, if only El would rip that plane ticket to pieces, burn bridges with David and her old life, let herself go and trust herself and Eddie like she was doing now – throwing the rock’n’roll horn sign as she was being passed on by unknown people in the crowd – her life would have been much easier.

************************************************************************************************ 

Mike slipped quickly in the backstage, freshened up and gulped down half a bottle of water, emptying the rest above his head; after drying his curls as best as he could, he literally ran out of the dressing room and joined the spectators that were still mingling there even if the show had ended. He absentmindedly accepted praises and friendly pats on the shoulder, his head more inclined to scan the audience rather than focusing on all the people approaching him. Suddenly his face split in a broad grin and, after excusing himself, he quickly caught up with the girl that was turning her back on him; the bass player smirked again and got ready for that much awaited meeting. “Guess who I am!” he finally hugged her from behind, making the most of that sudden closeness to leave a kiss on her hair. Needless to say, the girl was taken by surprise: she jumped, let out a scared shriek, blushed to the roots of her hair and finally turned herself to face the person she had to blame for that almost successful heart attack. “Blueberry, huh? I like it, it smells great” he added with a grin, playing with one of her braids and then using its little tuft to softly poke her nose in a teasing yet affectionate way. She flushed for the umpteenth time. “Cazzarola, Mike, I nearly died!” “I’m happy to see you too, Sunshine” Starr grinned, this time leaving a caress upon her red cheek “So, how is my favorite U-Dub student doin’?” “Hmph, f-favorite because I’m the only one you know…” Sara sneered, finally able to regain a bit of her natural complexion “Anyway, not bad… I’d feel better if somebody hadn’t made me believe that Lanegan was the surprise guest, though!” A few steps from them, Layla ignored her best friend’s decision to suddenly raise her voice and kept on chit-chatting with Eddie. Sara shook her head in disbelief – can you believe this bastard?! – but the bass player resumed to talk, shaking her out of her thoughts. “Man, that must have been really disappointing!” “You tell me…” the girl made her best puppy face and Starr smiled at her, a bit in awe. “Well, I think that Layne can clearly stand comparison with Lanegan’s vocal skills… buuuut, if you’re talkin’ about good looks, we could easily say that-” “MIIIIIIIKEEEEEEE!” The two of them turned in the direction from where the voice was coming, and noticed someone waving and approaching them, while keeping on shouting the bass player’s name. “We have visitors, Mike” Sara teased him, while the guy muttered a “Jesus Harold Christ on a fucking rubber crutch…” that clearly revealed his enthusiasm for that sudden interruption. The interruption finally reached them and revealed herself to be a fake blonde in a miniskirt, who, after noticing Sara’s presence, immediately shot a nasty glance at her. Needless to say, the other girl burst into laughter, a gesture that pissed off the new-entry, but that was able to make Mike laugh up his sleeve. “Say, are we going?!” she addressed him while impatiently tapping her foot, but the guy tried to make her understand that he wasn’t available. “Sorry, Terry, Jackie or whatever the fuck your name is, but I’m busy right now… and even after right now” “… Busy? With her? Are you serious???” the fake blonde bored holes into Sara with her gaze, but the other girl didn’t lose her aplomb. “Yeah, basically we were having this discussion about Dialogue Concerning the Two Chief World Systems… if you want, you can join us” “… I think I’d better be going, I can’t stand your presence anymore” “Can’t say the feeling isn’t mutual” Sara bowed slightly and the other girl, hugely pissed off, gave her the middle finger and finally stormed out. After a while, Mike turned to face Sara and a broad grin split his face: “You, girl, are seriously one of a kind… Look at that, she literally ran for her life! I swear to God, I’ll never be able to thank you enough for freeing me” “There’s no need to do it, I think the satisfaction of seeing you refusing the company of a vamp is enough… I’m quite amused, I must admit it” she laughed and he did the same. “So, where were we?” “I can’t remember… shall we go back to square one?” “With pleasure” he took a bow, grinning when she noticed his teasing and stuck her tongue out “Say, did you enjoy the show?” “Yeah, you guys did an awesome job! You’re getting better and better, it’s amazing” “Hey, thanks! You know, Iggy Pop’s audience didn’t seem to think the same, so we’re really glad to see that Seattle didn’t abandon us… this was a sold-out, ya know?” Mike admitted, pretty proud of his band. “It’s the least we could do, you guys totally deserve it” the girl smiled at him and he replied with a wink. “But heeeey, there’s Layla too!” the bass player finally acknowledged her roommate’s presence and leaned over her to greet her “I’m glad to see you too, you look great” Layla waved back at him and then quickly resumed to chit-chat with Eddie – apparently she didn’t want to waste any more time. Starr took no offence and instead turned his attention toward someone else, who was intent on sipping his fourth – fifth? – beer of the evening. “Oh, is this your boyfriend?” he asked the girl, pointing out Elias with a sly smile. “HELL NO! It’s just a colleague, Elias” she promptly explained, while the person involved introduced himself to the bass player and then gave her the middle finger. “Glad to hear it… but, even if he had been your sweetheart, I wouldn’t have been jealous at all” Starr grinned again, a smile that became brighter when he noticed Sara’s cheeks turning red for the umpteenth time. “No doubts about it, Mike” she sighed, preferring to fidget her hat in the hands instead of trying to hold his stare. “Oh, this reminds me something” the guy promptly changed topic “Sorry if I didn’t come to see you at the record store but, as I already said, we were pretty busy with the tour” “I see, don’t worry” she shrugged “However, we closed down, ya know?” “What? And how are you still managing to live, if you don’t have a permanent job?” “Legitimate question, since I don’t have an army of chicks disposed to buy me food and pay my bills…” Sara finally let out a relaxed chuckle, laughing even more when Mike flushed with a bit of embarrassment. “You sunk my battleship, I must admit my defeat!” he raised his hands, then took advantage of the girl’s temporary lack of attention to carry her on his shoulders. “OH NO, YOU DIDN’T” “Oooh yes, I did!” he parroted her, keeping her in place even though she was struggling to break free from his grip. “C’mon, Mike, drop me dooooooown!” “But you don’t bother me at all, you’re light as a feather!” “Thanks but I already know it and-hey! Don’t change the subject, you bastard!” the girl resumed to protest, making him laugh, then suddenly noticed someone in the distance “Hey, isn’t that Jerry?” The bass player turned to where she had just pointed at and saw his bandmate leaving with a young lady and her rainbow sweater. “Yeah, and he seems in good company… but the same could be said about me!” he quickly added, finally dropping her down. “Hmmm, ‘good’ is not the adjective I’d use for my presence… Go ask the vamp for a further confirmation” the girl grinned again, a hand still lingering on his naked chest; when she finally realized where it was, she quickly removed it and mumbled a quick apology that delighted Mike. “I don’t care what she thinks…” he shrugged, giving her a meaningful look “Too bad I only see you at gigs, I should have seriously paid you visit at the record store while I could” “Weeeell,” she cleared her throat, then proceeded to add in a casual way a “it just so happens now I’m currently working at Easy Street Records…” “I’ll come to see ya, you can bet on it” he beamed again at her. “Only if you promise me you won’t interfere with my job schedule, mr. Starr” “I’ll try to do my best, even if the temptation of kidnapping you is huge, miss Fancini” “Hey, how do you-” “I’ve got my secret informers” Mike interrupted her with a conspiratorial grin, then turned to his right “Oh, hi guys” Sara followed his gaze and met Stone and Jeff’s own ones – she gave the first one a quick nod and deliberately ignored the bass player, still shaken up after what had happened the night before. “Starr, I need my tuner back” was Ament’s abrupt greeting, while Gossard rested his hand on her shoulder. At first a bit taken aback, Mike quickly recovered and gave him a “Sure, buddy, let’s go get it” that made the other bass player tense. Sara noticed it but didn’t say anything – in the meantime Starr had already diverted his attention toward her. “Well, milady, it seems to me that the time to say goodbye for us has already come… A real shame” “I couldn’t disagree with you, sir” “But fear not: on my word as a gentleman, I can personally guarantee you that soon I’ll stop by Easy Street Records” “Then I’ll be surely glad to have you as a customer” she faked a graceful bow “Until next time, lord Starr” “Until next time, lady Fancini; I’m already counting the days that will keep us apart” and, thus said, he grabbed her hand and placed a quick kiss on the back of it – all that without tearing his gaze away from her. She blushed, diverted her gaze from his chest (that was peeking from his open shirt) to stole a glance at Jeff – who looked exactly like he did when she had done something just for the joy of pissing him off (how on Earth wasn’t he freezing his ass off with just that stupid tank top on??) – flushed again for that last thought and then watched the two of them finally disappear in the crowd. “It’s comforting to see how chivalry is still practiced nowadays… I guess that the fact he’s born in Honolulu plays a great role” Stone winked at her. “Yeah… I guess so” she replied absent-mindedly, still looking at the door behind which the bass players had vanished. “Well, I’m gonna come back in five minutes, so… Wait for me” Gossard added and, thus said, he went in the same direction of Mike and Jeff, leaving her alone with her thoughts. Sara hunched her shoulders and mulled again over what she had just witnessed: the two musicians had already seen each other and she could feel that their encounter hadn���t ended on a positive note. Mike had been able to hide his annoyance, whereas Ament wasn’t even trying to dissimulate his evident edginess: had something happened backstage? Did he witness their whole exchange? Had he been bothered by it? And if so, why on Earth would he give a single fuc-? She stopped abruptly, sudden flashes finally coming back to her: her fingers intertwining around a neck, strong arms carrying her to bed, the pleasant warmth irradiating from a chest against her cheek, calloused hands carefully brushing against her skin… the spicy scent of a particular aftershave that she hadn’t smelled in five years and that she had missed with all her heart. She immediately put a hand over her mouth to not let a frightened scream escape from it. <You swore to yourself this wouldn’t happen again… YOU SWORE IT!> But instead she felt all those five years, one by one, slowly slipping from under her feet and leaving her there, standing petrified – again seventeen, again kicked by the cruel things that had forged her… again defenseless under his gaze. Her eyes began to fill with tears and she gasped for some fresh air; she found herself suddenly outside, the snowflakes already tinging her hair and tickling her nose. The girl hadn’t been able yet to properly calm herself when, out of the corner of her eye, she noticed somebody already reaching her. “Did you really think that Kinney and me are cousins?” Elias asked her after a while, still surprised for her previous assumption. “I just wished it wasn’t true, that’s all” she sniffled, making him shrug, and the two of them resumed to watch the snow in silence, together.

************************************************************************************************ “Oh, thank Cthulhu I’ve found ya!” Gossard snapped, finally reaching the girl and already regretting his decision of freezing his ass outside “Where the fuck have you been?! I told ya to wait for me – it took me less than 5 minutes… but no, you couldn’t waste all that time for me, huh? Why is everybody being such an asshole lately?! First Ames and now you too… Well, missy, what’s your pathetic exc-?” The guitarist stopped himself because Elias nudged him – careful not to let Sara notice his gesture – and beckoned to him to pay attention to her miserable expression; Stone immediately noticed her red eyes and mentally cursed his best friend: nobody could convince him that Jeff hadn’t played a role in that. “You know what? Forget it, these last few hours were a bit stressful for me… but I shouldn’t have taken it out on you, I’m sorry” he awkwardly patted her on the back, and she shrugged. “… it’s alright” <No, it isn’t, but you’re a fierce little shrimp and you’ll never admit it> he thought, then threw his arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer; she closed her eyes and wished to crawl in her bed as soon as possible.    That calm was suddenly interrupted by the storm, appeared in the form of Ament and Krusen dragging an almost unconscious McCready. “I can’t believe this sack of shit weighs so much!” “As thin as a rake but he fooled us all… never judge a book by its cover, Ament” “Oi, Krusen, just gimme a fuckin’ break here!” “Have I ever told you that I love you, Jeffyyyyy????” Mike suddenly slurred, clinging on to Jeff’s waist and looking exactly like he had the intention of snogging him. “You’re never gonna drink again, Cready! You hear me? Ever!” the bass player screamed, trying to shake his bandmate off, then turned to look at Gossard because he had heard him sneer. Faced with the scene of his historical enemy cuddled up to his best friend, he found himself frowning and more and more perplexed – maybe fed up was the most correct term, but he would never admit it, not even for all the gold in the world. Ignoring Mike’s protest for all those sudden movements, Jeff turned again toward the Moore’s entrance: just a matter of seconds and his flatmate came out walking arm in arm with none other than Four Eyes. <Is this a group outing or a fuckin’ wedding agency gathering?! Look at all these lovebirds – UGH, I THINK I’M GONNA PUKE> “Soooo? You guys are good? Everything’s alright?” Stone sent the new-entries a knowing look, wiggling his eyebrows so blatantly that he thought they would have fallen off his face. “Oh, yeah! We just finished to have a chat with Chris – he introduced me to Susan, she seems really nice and interesting!” Layla immediately explained, a flood of words enthusiastically pouring out of her mouth. Gossard sighed in relief: once again, McCready had been able to avoid a disaster – courtesy of him, obviously – without lifting a single finger. Although lost in a drunken stupor, the other guitarist seemed to understand what had just happened and gave him the thumbs up, along with the stupidest yet brightest grin he could muster up in that moment; Stone shook his head and gave him the middle finger – all of that without letting disappear the playful smirk he had plastered on his lips. “GUESS WHO I AM?” an unknown high-pitched voice broke the peaceful moment outside the venue. Everybody turned to see a tall girl with a head full of red curls that had approached Eddie from behind and was now covering his eyes with her hands. Actually, she wasn’t totally unknown… at least not to everybody. “Oh… well… uhm…” Eddie mumbled, while a second dark haired girl in a jet black biker jacket stormed into the circle of friends, basically pushing Layla away from the singer and taking her place. “If you give the wrong answer, you won’t be coming to our party” giggled the second girl, but Eddie didn’t look so eager to take part to the game. “Is it… Theresa maybe?” he guessed with a grimace. “Hahaha nooo! She is Theresa, I am Sylvia!” the redhead exclaimed, removing her hands from Vedder’s face and resting them on his shoulders as she leaned forward to talk to him. “Sylvia with a Y like Sylvia Plath” Stone explained the name of Jeff’s friend to the others. <Wow, Sylvia with a Y, that's so unique! I've got a Y in my name too but I don't make such a big deal of it...> Layla thought as she observed the two girls who were all over Eddie. “And who’s that? Did we meet her?” Sylvia addressed Jeff first, got no answer and then her friend, who just shrugged “Anyway, it’s with a Y like Sylvia, Kansas. That’s where my mom was born” “Interesting!” Elias nodded as he was shamelessly checking out both girls. “But you didn’t recognize me and I feel very offended right now” the girl pouted, giving Eddie puppy eyes. <Fuck, from the nasty look she's giving to her, I guess Layla wishes she'd meet the same fate as Plath. Too bad Sara is not her usual self, she'd have destroyed these two> Stone noticed as Jeff’s friends kept on talking. “Cut him some slack, Syl! He just met you a couple of hours ago” Ament finally spoke a word and stuck his hands into the pockets of his jacket when it looked like McCready could stand without any help, but immediately grasped him back as he started to dangerously sway left and right. “Now you gotta come to our party to cheer her up” Theresa remarked, almost jumping. “But… wasn’t I supposed to give the correct answer to be invited?” Eddie asked confused. “Ugh, you ask too many questions!” Sylvia blurted out. “… And think too much” her friend added. “Are we invited too?” Elias asked eagerly. “Ehm… well… our apartment is not that big, it’s just for a small group of friends, you know” Theresa dismissed him with little embarassment. “Very small” Sylvia remarked, winking at Eddie. “I don’t take much space. And I can bring the booze” Elias insisted and made everyone laugh, apart from Sara and Mike who seemed like zombies for very different reasons. “We’ve already got plenty of alcohol, thank you. So? Will you come to our place?” the brunette looked at Eddie and Jeff alternatively, impatiently waiting for an answer. “Actually, I’m kind of tired… I don’t really feel like partying right now, I’d much rather lay down in a bed” Eddie nervously scratched his nape as he tried to be gentle in his rejection. “One does not exclude the other” Sylvia clutched his right shoulder and Layla blatantly gasped. “Ok, calm down ladies, we gotta bring Mr. Designated Drinker here home first. I’ll catch up with you later, ok?” Jeff chimed in to save the situation, seeing that his friend was uncomfortable. “Uhm, can’t you just call him a cab?” Sylvia pointed out looking at how Mike was slouching against his friend. “No, we can’t. Good night, girls!” Layla broke into the conversation, grabbed Eddie by his arms and literallly dragged him away, followed by the gang. “Hurry up, Jeff, we won’t be waiting all night long!” Theresa hollered then gave a weird look at Elias, the only one who hadn’t moved. “Aren’t you helping taking your drunk friend home?” Sylvia asked puzzled. “No, I was all for the cab. Do I have to call one for us or you’ve got a car?” he insisted. “Hahaha! Not if you were the last man on earth, baby, sorry!” the girl said, waving him goodbye. “Bye, dreamer!” Theresa did the same and the two friends disappeared, as the guy stuck his tongue at them and quickly tried to catch up with his cousin and the rest of the group, who were heading for the van. “Is there room for all of us?” Elias asked, eyeing the inside of the band van filled with instruments. “Didn’t you just say you take very little space?” Dave asked him, playfully shoving him. “What the fuck are you doing?” Jeff asked as Gossard placed his palm over the bassist’s forehead. “Uhm… it’s cold… you’ve got no fever” Stone concluded with an extremely serious expression on his face, while Eddie was helping Layla get into the van. “The fuck are you talking about?” “You’ve just said no to a private party with two girls, you must be sick for sure” Stone grinned and the wider the guitarist smiled, the angrier Jeff got. “You know what? You’re damn right, there must be something wrong with me if I prefer going back home with a bunch of jerks like you, rather than have some fun! Fuck you, Stone! Take care of our friend of the Dead Liver Society by yourself, I have a party to go to!” Jeff abruptly let go of Mike – who instantly collapsed over Stone – and walked away. “Where the fuck are you going??? There’s a snow storm coming!” Stone called for him and would have flailed his arms too, if only they had been free. He looked at an agonizing Mike on his left and a comatose Sara on his right and rolled his eyes, before the three of them clumsily reached for the van.

************************************************************************************************ As Stone was taking everybody home, Layla felt tired all of a sudden and was almost drifting off to sleep as her head slowly fell and leaned against Eddie’s shoulder. He exhaled as he enjoyed the feel of her against his body and thought about how every time he thought he had figured that girl out, she then ended up doing something completely unexpected and surprising him. He was sure she would say no and laugh it off when he challenged her to crowdsurf, instead she took up on his offer immediately. <I like to feel disoriented> He was almost sorry when the van stopped right in front of their condo and he had to wake her up. “Hey, we’re home” he shook his shoulder as lightly as he could and she opened one of her eyes. Eddie’s words worked as an alarm clock for Sara too, who sprung out of the vehicle and quickly made her way towards the building as her two roommates slowly followed, trying to catch up with her. “Thank youuu, Stoneyyyyy” Layla yawned as she waved goodbye to the guitarist, who was now alone on the van. “Good night, Sleeping Beauties!” Gossard told them, before rolling up the window and leaving.

************************************************************************************************ <God bless The Pink Door…> Jeff thought, saying goodbye to its owner and clutching a bottle of Moscato in his right hand. The pleasant warmth of the venue gave immediately way to the intense cold that was waiting outside, making him instantly shiver. “Damn me and my stroke of genius – naked knees and all that shit” he took the first sip of wine and started walking toward Pike Place, the wind hitting him with lashings of snowflakes. All the clever people in Seattle had chosen to stay inside, so the city was practically desert – the rarefied atmosphere reminded him of The Dead, that Joyce’s short story that he had liked ever since he had studied it at school. In that moment he felt exactly like its main character, his mind bursting with too many thoughts: what kind of future was waiting for him? Had his refusal to compromise been the right choice? From a moral point of view it surely had been, but sometimes he found himself wondering if that was seriously all life could offer him – maybe a more stable job would have given him plenty of opportunities that his current lifestyle precluded him…    He sighed: no matter how many times he had told himself not to think too much, he couldn’t help it – that was just how he was, no point in changing this behavior after twenty-seven years, right?  In the meantime his feet had dragged him down the 1st Avenue; he raised his eyes and found the Seattle Art Museum standing out against the sky, just in front of him. “Long time no see, pal…” he smiled to himself, sipped his wine for the umpteenth time and went to sit on the steps in front of its entrance. Jeff went to reminisce how many times he had actually visited it, and was surprised to realize that he had been walking down its corridors only once, when he had just moved to the Emerald City. “Weeell, gotta add this to the New Year’s resolutions” he concluded, lifting the bottle in a “cheers” gesture and realizing he had already almost emptied it. “Shit, I should have bought another one…” he muttered, then stood up and turned to Pike Street, in order to go on with his wanderings. He walked past the Paramount Theatre and the Northwest School, all places linked to his past – recent and not – and then decided to end his walk in the park near Hendrix’s statue. The bass player climbed over the grating (only to discover that the warden had forgotten to lock the main gate) and then instinctively looked for his skateboard, but apparently he had left it at The Moore. He cursed himself for having already finished the bottle; now he would have needed it more than ever.

In the end, he found out that not buying a second bottle of wine had been a wonderful choice: it had been a while since he had actually enjoyed some free time without the strong urge of drowning himself in alcohol. He had also forgotten how much he liked spending some time alone, just watching the sky or his surroundings… just him, a multitude of snowflakes falling above the lake and the noise of the city in the background. Italian wine? Northwest School? He could almost hear that asshole of Gossard sneering at him, teasing for his peculiar choices that lead to a certain someone… <How the hell did we end like this?> Jeff sighed, but the snow didn’t answer him. Maybe it was better like that, maybe not getting an answer was the best thing for him… maybe he already knew it, and was simply choosing not to pay attention to it. Maybe.

************************************************************************************************ “No point in running, Sara, if you don’t have the keys…” Vedder said in a not so low voice as he and Layla got in the hallway that led to their apartment and spotted Sara leaning against the door with her arms folded over her chest. The girl didn’t say anything, but the look she gave to him made him pick up the pace a little. Once they got inside, Sara murmured a feeble “…‘night” and went straight to her room, shutting the door behind her. <This is disorienting too, but not in a good way> Eddie reflected, dragging Layla to her room. “Oh, finally!” Layla sighed as she plopped down face first onto her bed. “Are you ok? Can I leave or…?” Eddie asked nervously. “I’m fine” the girl’s voice came out muffled through the duvet. “Shouldn’t you at least take your boots off?” “Yeah” she replied and remained still without actually doing anything. Eddie called her once again and, when she didn’t answer, he started taking off her boots. <I hope she doesn't try to kick me like I did when I was drunk> he pondered and was lucky enough not to be hit by Layla’s heels. “Now you can sleep, good night” he said, while the girl started to slowly pull the duvet aside and sneak into bed. “G’night” she mumbled, covering herself up to her nose. He smiled to himself and was about to leave the room when suddenly he remembered a detail. “Layla? Hey, Layla? You can’t sleep with your glasses on, you gotta take them off” Eddie shook her a little getting a low grumbling as a reply “C’mon, you might break them. I know the new pair Sara got you is really cool, but that’s not a good reason to destroy the old ones. And you might get hurt too” the singer kept trying until he saw Layla wriggle under the covers and stretch out her arm to reach out for her nightstand and place her glasses right there. Unfortunately she missed the target and they fell on the floor. <Shit> Eddie lit up the lamp, immediately got them back and made sure they were still intact. “Thank god” he whispered to himself as he put the glasses on the bedside table, but his hands froze and started to tighten around them the moment he noticed a familiar piece of paper. <A plane ticket?> He didn’t need to read it through, the first printed word he saw was the only thing that really mattered: BOSTON.

The thought she was going there once again to see him made him want to puke. He let go of the glasses and turned off the light, making the red numbers on the display of the clock radio stand out in the dark. “… Happy birthday to me” he muttered coldly as he left the room.

[coltonleeh]

Together..Again || Laynes

Tagged: Colton Haynes and Caity Lotz @itscaitylotz

Warnings: N/A

Plot: Caity and Colton try to just hang out as friends with their animals, but it doesn’t take any time at all for their feelings to come out. 

Caity: It had been two months since her break up with Colton. Two months filled of ups and downs, two months in which she had decided to learn how to be with herself. Months in which she had also thought she could eventually learn to open up to someone else. But she had finally realized that maybe she wasn't quite there yet, and she needed to be with herself first in order to with someone else again. She knew that everything happened for a reason. The actress now considered herself wiser, and even older - yes, it might seem stupid to think that someone could grow in just a matter of months. But she had always thought that it was amazing how life and how things could change in just a blink of an eye. This was the first time they were hanging out together, just the two of them after their break up. And even if they had kept in contact through texts, calls and even video chats, it wasn't the same. She had missed him terribly and there weren't enough words in the dictionary that could express how happy Caity felt to know that they could simply be there, just hanging out like they always did. "Dinner is almosttt ready." The blonde announced as walked towards the living room, looking at Colton with all of their fur babies with a very prominent smile on her face. "Have a little faith in me." She pleaded with a soft chuckle.

Colton was surrounded by three cats and two dogs as he sat on Caity's couch, somehow feeling more home than he had in two months, which was strange because it wasn't even his own house. And he knew why, it all to do with the blonde in the kitchen and all the animals surrounding him, they were his home. It hurt, a lot more than he cared to admit; it hurt every time he thought about their little family and everything they once had together but didn't anymore. Even though the break up was a mutual decision, Colton couldn't help but to think of the 'what if's', especially right now with Caity so close but never close enough. "It's hard to have faith in the girl who almost burnt down our apartment several times," he laughed, stroking Cade's head as the cat sat on his chest. The only cat of the three that Colton had gotten his own, but had easily become Caity's just as much as he was Colton's. "As long as I don't die, I'll never doubt your cooking abilities ever again. Or, at least I won't vocalize them," he teased with a wink in her direction as he watched Dally practically bounce over to his mom, "I think he missed you a lot. Well, we all did, but he's barely let you out of his sight since we got here."

Caity: As soon as Dally bounced over to her, Caity's face lit up and she bent down to stroke the back of his ears. "Oh hi baby boy, did you miss mommy? Because I missed you so so much, yes I did." The blonde immediately laughed when she was greeted by her pup's tongue all over her right cheek, even if the dalmatian was way too big now, she would always consider him her puppy. "And excuse you!" Caity stood up again, with a pout and a frown spreading across her features that were expressing her discontent. "Didn't I get points for trying at least? At least that girl wanted to feed you a homemade meal instead of take out all the time so now shhh!" She exclaimed with another chuckle. "You won't doubt my cooking, I'm extremely confident in this, trust me. So now get your pretty ass off the couch and come and help me out." Caity nodded firmly as she gave him a serious look for a short seconds which was followed by a small playful smile, before she turned around and proceeded to walk back to the kitchen. "Come here baby, you're helping out too." She said to Dally.

Colton watched on with a grin on his face as Caity and Dally interacted, with a shake of his head. "He's such a little attention hog, I wonder who he got that from," he smirked, knowing that was actually directed at both of them. But just wanting to tease Caity even more because it was how they always interacted with each other. "Hey, I never had any complaints about the take out or anything else you ever did or tried to do. You get all the points in the world. You were the best girlfriend a guy could ask for, even with your terrible cooking," he laughed with a shake of his head, setting Cade down on the couch next to Snow. Barry was off on the other side near Beez; the two of them liked being on their own than the other three did. "But you're damn right about one thing, both me and my ass are pretty," he chuckled as he made his way into the kitchen with her and leaned against the counter, "Okay, tell me. What do you need me to do? Do I need to taste test?" Colton could smell everything that she had going in the kitchen, and it smelled amazing and he let out a smile hum of approval to let her know.

Caity: turned around right upon hearing Colton's words, which made her narrow her eyes in his direction. "You, definitely you.. 100% you. But hey, it's okay to admit it. And gosh, remember when you were sick? You were even a bigger attention hog, but I didn't mind one bit." The blonde admitted with a soft laugh and a playful rolling of her eyes. She knew very damn well that taking a stroll down memory lane was the worst idea for her, especially when she had him so close. But sometimes things were... inevitable. "The best girlfriend? Try the okayest girlfriend and I'll believe you." Caity clarified with an amused smile. Once inside the kitchen, she began to take out both plates. She had listened to his question, but she chose not to reply just yet. Instead she proceeded to take out a spoon and dipped it in the bourbon sauce of the chicken. "Correct, well and you are giving me a hand with the plates and wine glasses. Today's menu? Bourbon pecan chicke with white wine. But I need you to give me your honest answer with the sauce.. ready?" She asked before she instructed the spoon to his mouth.

Colton playfully scoffed and shook his head. "Me? No. I was definitely talking about you. That's not fair! Being sick doesn't count, I turn into a giant baby when I'm sick. And it's not my fault that I wanted to take every opportunity I could to be needy with you. You were all cute when you played nurse and everything," he grinned, thinking about those exact times and feeling a happiness wash over him just from the memories. They were the happiest times of his life, and he thought about them more often than he probably should. "No. You were the best girlfriend in the world. Nothing will ever make me change my mind about that, so don't even try it," he shrugged and reached down to pet Dally. The dog was watching every move they both made now that they were in the kitchen, hoping for anything to be dropped that he could eat. "I can definitely help with that, and the dishes after dinner," he said, raising an eyebrow in surprise as she mentioned what she had cooked, "I was expecting something a lot simpler than that, I'm already impressed." Colton watched as she brought the spoon towards his mouth, instantly feeling just how close it made him and just stared at her as he took a taste of the sauce. "It's delicious," he compliment seriously, licking his lips at the taste as he kept his on her's out of instinct and the inability to turn away, "Like, really fucking delicious."

Caity: "Well.. I -- you know -- I.." Caity began to babble trying to come up with a convincing argument, but the fact of the matter was that he was right. "Fine." She finally admitted with another rolling of her eyes. "I was an attention hog and I'm not going to deny it, it was so so gross.. like ugh.." She even fake shuddered at the memory just to add a dramatic effect to her statement. "I was way too needy, seriously - how did you put up with me?" The actress asked honestly curious. "I liked playing nurse though." She stated with another chuckle. "Oh, I'm sure I could remind you of the endless times where I was such a crappy girlfriend.. but fine, I won't since I'm trying this new thing called being nice and not argue all the time." She gave him another smile that was followed by a nonchalant shrug. "I thought that after all this time you had learned that I don't like to do what people expect.." She began to say, but she was more worried about his opinion. So she kept her eyes on him at all times, trying to gauge his reaction and even his body language. So after he finally spoke again, the actress felt like she could breathe. She exhaled deeply, and the corners of her mouth slowly started to curl up, to reveal a smile. "Yeah?" She began to say, noticing that Colton still had remains of the sauce on the corner of his mouth so she extended her hand to remove it using the pad of her thumb, which she later instructed to her hand to wipe it clean with her mouth. "Mm, okay, it is good. I told you!"

Colton felt his smile turn down a little bit when Caity talked about being too needy and just shook his head briefly. "You weren't too needy. Part of being in a relationship is needing each other, you just forgot that it was okay to need yourself also. And that's an easy fix. You know, minus the fact the you lied to me about cheating on me because of it," he laughed a little. Which is something he could do about the situation now, the pain from that situation was long gone, as were the trust issues. "And for the record, I put up with your being needy and a so called 'crappy girlfriend', which is a lie, just so you know, because I love you. It doesn't matter what you throw at me, that's not going to change so none of the rest matters," he shrugged and mentally hoped she wouldn't notice his use of present tense instead of past, "Besides, you're such a pain in the ass that someone had to put up with you. Might as well be me." Colton just grinned when he saw Caity's face light up at his reaction to the sauce, loving how happy it seemed to make her. "Yeah. I'm completely impressed right now," he smiled widely, though his brows knitted together in confusion when Caity started to reach for his mouth. And that caused his body to stiffen a bit, the feeling of her finger almost on his lips and then watching as he licked the sauce off. "Yeah, you told me. Mhm," he mumbled, still trying to break himself away from being distracted by her previous action, "I'll go set the table." Colton nodded and grabbed the plates, taking a deep breath as he put his back to her for a moment and walked to put the plates and everything down for them.

Caity: had to wrinkle her nose as soon as Colton brought up one of her.. slips. "Yeahhh, not my finest moments." Caity admitted. "I know that now though. At least now I'm not afraid to admit that I need you, maybe that's why I refuse to let you walk out of my life." She began to say, while placing a hand against the edge of the counter, proceeding to lean against it. "Because I hate to break it to you, kid. Remember all those times where I said that you were stuck with me? Guess what? All of that, it was true. Sucks to be you." She muttered with a throaty chuckle. But it didn't take long for her expression to change, it took four simple words to leave her paralyzed in place. 'Because I love you' What did that even mean? Was he talking about loving her as a friend? Maybe as more than a friend? She found herself running out of air. For the longest time she had been trying to convince herself that she didn't love him, but yet the feelings for him seem to grow stronger with each passing day."Look who's talking." Caity finally gathered up the courage to speak again choosing not to make a comment on his previous words, wanting to sound as normal as she could as she walked closer to him. Her bright blue eyes looking up straight into his before she whispered, "Come here." and in cue Caity tiptoed to wrap her arms around his neck so she could pull him into a tight embrace, she didn't care about anythng. She just wanted to feel him close, even if it was for a couple of seconds before she released him so he could finally set the table as he said he was going to. "Oh, yeah, I'll bring the wine. Are you hungry? Because I'm starving - also, what movie do want to watch? Horror? Comedy? maybe Sci-fi?"

Colton smiled the type of smile that only came out with Caity, one that he wasn't sure if anyone other than her had ever experienced from him. "I'd never walk out of your life. Even when I try, or you try to walk out, it never works. We're always right back here, and I think that says a lot," he laughed nervously. Because he knew how much it said, but he wasn't sure if they were ready to really address that yet. But he also knew that it couldn't only be obvious to him, that she had to feel it too. That even their first time being together after breaking up two months ago felt more right than anything else ever had. Colton turned around when Caity instructed him to and instantly wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her body close to his and not wanting to let go. God, holding her felt like the most right thing in the world and he wasn't sure how he ever went without it. And when Caity pulled away, it took Colton a minute to even realize she was saying anything. He was way more focused on the way his heart was beating and on her; just everything about her. Without thinking twice about it, Colton took the few steps between them once again to close the distance and instantly pressed his lips to her's. Hands going right to the side of her face and kissing her with everything he had, and he was sure he could feel his own eyes starting to water just from the intensity of his own feelings at this moment. "I'm sorry," he whispered when he pulled away, shaking his head, "I probably shouldn't have done that, but..I couldn't not do it. I've wanted to since the second I walked through the door, but I was trying to resist. In the end, I couldn't. So, yeah. I'm sorry." He wasn't, not really. Kissing her was the best decision he could make for himself, it was the only real decision at that point, and he only hoped she felt the same way he did. And that he didn't just ruin the friendship between them, that he hadn't read the signs entirely wrong. "Dinner, yeah. Let's eat. And you can pick the movie."

Caity: was left paralyzed in her position after feeling Colton's lips against hers. She wasn't expecting him to do such thing but as always, he was finding new ways of surprising her. She was panting for air, after he pulled back. Caity could only stare at him when he began to apologize, but she didn't say a word. Her bright blue eyes were merely staring at his. She chose not to say anything, instead she figured she'd let her body do the talking. Without breaking the eye contact, she closed the distance between them again. Her thumb began to touch his lower lip while her eyes where following her own movements; her right hand went to the back of his head where she began to gently tug on his hair, in that possessive way that would characterize her. Caity tiptoed to press her plump lips against the corner of his mouth, proceeding to leave a trail of very soft and gentle kisses all over his perfect jawline, making each kiss last a couple of seconds, until her lips found his ear where she whispered, "Never apologize for kissing me, or else we are going to have a serious problem." The actress smirked and pulled back, already on her way to grab the plates where she suddenly remembered something.. "Oh, I almost forgot." She practically bounced back to where Colton was and gave him a hard peck on his lips. "You should know that if you steal kisses from me, I always get them back." She shurugged nonchalantly, trying to keep her cool even if on the inside she felt like a wave of emotions was suddenly washing over her. She couldn't even describe what she was currently feeling. All she knew was that she had been dying to taste his lips again, and as always, he was the best at reading her body language. "You're so going to regret letting me choose the movie." Caity said as she began to search for the wine.

Colton wasn't sure what he was expecting, but when Caity was pressed against him once again, he couldn't help but smile as he stared at her. The feeling of her fingers in his hair was everything he had been needing for months; wanting to feel all the different way's Caity claimed him and this was one of them. And once she began to trail the kisses over his jaw, Colton happily sighed and brought his hands to her hips. Thumbs tracing along her hip bone as he closed his eyes, savoring the feeling of her lips against his skin and never wanting to let go. "Duly noted," he laughed and was about to step away when Caity kissed once again. Colton instantly returned it, feeling his body setting on fire from the love for this girl coursing through his veins and wasn't sure it could ever be put out. And he definitely didn't ever want it to. "I think I like the idea of that game, it means our kisses will be never ending," he smirked and finished the last few things to set the table, "I have a lot of regrets when it comes to you, but you picking the movie won't be one of them." Colton was about to turn away when he realized just how his words sounded and quickly turned to fully face her. "Wait, that sounded way worse than I meant it. I don't have regrets about you, I have regrets about things have happened with us," he corrected as quickly as he could, "I've never regretted you, I just regret continuously letting you go."

Caity: immediately turned around as soon as she heard Colton's choice of words, which made her raise one of her perfectly done eyebrows and cross her arms over her chest. "What?" She questioned, hoping the whole 'having regrets' wasn't as bad as he had made it sound. But it didn't take long for Colton to address her concerns, and when he did, the blonde allowed a breath to escape from her full lips and a small smile began to creep on her face. "I truly, really and honestly hope that you don't have regrets when it comes to me and.." Caity began to say but his final words interrupted her sentence making her close her mouth again, leaving her lost for words. 'I just regret continously letting you go' In that instant, Caity began to feel how her weaks started to weaken and her heart started beating faster than usual, it was as if her throat was constricting and air couldn't reach her lungs. "Colton..." She tried to take a deep breath as she ran a hand through her blonde locks. "You can't say that to me, I've been trying so fucking hard to move on. I've been trying to tell myself that I don't love you, but I do and there's nothing I can do about that. I keep telling myself that I'll be okay by myself and then you kiss me, you tell me you love me -- yes I heard it, and you basically say you regret letting me go? Dammit, you're so not helping right now! How am I supposed to get over you?"

Colton listened as Caity went through all the things that he had been going through the past two months as well, and he didn't interrupt her until she was done speaking. "I won't ever regret you, Caity," he promised and took a deep breath, trying to collect his thoughts. All the words he wanted to say had gone through his mind a thousand times since they broke up, and he wasn't if he'd ever be able to say them. And now that he was getting a chance to do so, he didn't know how to make it all come out properly. "You're not supposed to get over me," he stated simply with a shrug and a laugh, "You're not. Just like I'm not supposed to get over you. We're both idiots for breaking up once again, even though we both know we're supposed to be together. It hasn't even been an hour and we're already kissing, and talking about our feelings. Even after two months, it feels like no time at has passed." Colton tilted his head, looking at her bright blue eyes with one's that almost mirrored her own. "Yes, we broke up because it 'wasn't working' and we were 'trying too hard' and all that," Colton began, using airquotes, "But do you know why it felt like we were trying so hard? Because we were. We were trying to be this picture perfect couple, and pretend like nothing in the past ever happened to us. But that's not us, babe. It's never been us. We're both stubborn, we're both pains in the ass, we're both jealous beyond reason sometimes, we're messy, we bicker like crazy, we can fight like two people that hate each other, but we also love each other more than anyone could ever come close to understanding. We weren't being us before, Caity. That's why it didn't work." It had been two months of him thinking about this, even though he had slept with Emily a few times, Caity had never once left his mind and all he ever wanted to do was say these things to her. But it wasn't until seeing her tonight that he knew she felt the same way. "We're supposed to be together. You know it. I know it. Those five fur balls in there know it. Everyone knows it."

Caity: As soon as Colton began to speak, it was as if a gate she was doing her hardest to keep closed suddenly opened and before she could even stop it, a couple of tears escaped out of her eyes and began to roll down her cheeks. Making the actress look away, as she used the back of her hand to dry them off. 'It hasn't even been an hour and we're already kissing' that simple statement made her chuckle despite the tears that were still betraying her. Because he was right, she wasn't supposed to get over him. And deep down inside she had always known this, and maybe that was the reason why things with Ryan hadn't worked out to begin with - her heart wasn't there. It was with Colton, where it would always be. "Fuck, you'll be the death of me.." Caity took a deep breath as she looked up at the ceiling trying to gather her thoughts together while pursing her lips, to keep the lower one from trembling. It took her a long minute to compose herself in order to respond. "Let's say you're right -- let's say we were trying to be this perfect couple, but maybe it was because we were wanting to do things differently. And it wasn't us, we don't do perfection. You, me.. we're perfectly imperfect, and yes I'm using your words right now." Caity allowed a breathless chuckle to leave her lips, and she felt a little stupid that a few tears were still escaping. Damn him. "But gosh, what are you even trying to say right now? We're supposed to be together, fine, I do know it. My entire being knows it when it gravitates towards you. But what does it even mean? Are we getting back together? Are we picking up were we left off? What happens now? Do you really think we can be us this time?" Caity inquired as she began to nibble on her lower lip while walking closer to him, as she whispered, "I'm so in love with you." While placing her right hand on one side of his cheek.

Colton could do nothing but smile at Caity as he watched her take in everything he had just said. There was something so beautiful about watching this girl try to get a grip on her own feelings, and allow herself to feel more than anything. Which is something he knew she really only did for him, and it made him love her so much more than he could have ever imagined. "As long as you don't die before we get to have a long life together, I think I'd be okay with that," he teased softly, reaching out to wipe the tears away. Using the pads of his thumbs to slowly wipe underneath her eyes and her upper cheeks, the smile still on his face the entire time. "Stop thinking so much, you're making it way harder than we're supposed to be," he laughed, "We're together. We're not taking it slow or any of that crap, because we suck at that anyways. We're back together, and the rest we'll figure out as time goes. It's not really picking up where we left off, we're just starting again. But this time we're just going to be us, and we're going to accept the fact that we have a messy past together. It's part of who we are as people and as a couple." Colton closed his eyes as her hand carressed his cheek, leaning into the touch and pressing a kiss to her palm. "And I'm in love with you," he promised as he swept her up into his arms, "You're the love of my life, and it doesn't matter how many times we try to end this, it's never going to happen. You're mine. Always. Forever. Until the day I die." Colton carried Caity in the living room and sat down on the couch, holding her close to him as their animals all surrounded them. Even Beez and Barry, who usually kept to themselves. "We can eat in a few minutes, I just want to sit here like this for a few minutes first. I've got two months of holding you and kissing you to make up for," he grinned and kissed her once again as Dally settled in next to them. It was clear that Colton wasn't the only one feeling more at home than ever, their pets were clearly feeling the same and Colton knew everything was going to be okay now that he had Caity back.

[laynefaire]

Hey Layne. Please don't publish this as I'm shy as hell on tumblr, but I wanted to wave at you and can't 'anon'. Your tags about 'weird anon' and things that have gone on. I wondered if it was about friendships etc. I just wanted to give you massive internet hugs to say I love your blog, live for waking up here in the UK to your evening pretty boy posts and 'that's a penis' pics! Your dedication in crafting beautiful quilts, support for the boys and charities, radiates warmth and love and 1/2

2/2 can't remember exactly the sentence I was at! But just to say I hope things are OK and whatever you're thinking isn't the case. And if it is, it works itself out. It was lovely to read about your trip over here last year, and I love seeing you on my dash. An over-the-ocean hug to you from a complete stranger xxx

Hey love - I hope you don’t mind that I copied this into a post with your blog name redacted because it made me smile and lifted my spirits after several crappy days. I wanted to give you at least anonymous credit for that( at least you and I know who you are), and after some observations today, it was a catalyst to speak my piece (and find some peace). Before that, though - thank you. Thank you for being kind, for caring, and for letting me know you “saw” me. It meant more than you will ever know. And I adored England. I would make more frequent trips if I could afford it.  You are right - the tags were about friendships. I actually deleted the tag post earlier today because I have hit the “fuck it” wall. 

For two days, my brain has obsessively stressed over “what have I done? how did I offend them?” And it was only after reading a post someone else made that I realized, that like I have done with every bit of conflict I’ve encountered in this fandom, I was assuming the situation was all my fault. 

Yes, I’ve been incredibly busy for the past few months, but I’ve still made efforts to maintain open lines of communication. I’ve been met with ignored asks, private messages, and texts. But the real cap was, after the anon I received, the realization that the lack of communication extended to not even receiving a simple “Happy Birthday” - something people I haven’t spoken to in a year or better still managed on my Facebook pages.  

Today, though, I finally accepted that, even when things go awry, that it still doesn’t mean everything is my fault. While I do wish that if there is an issue, that those who have pulled away would have been open with me and talked it out, them not doing so isn’t my fault either. 

To quote Louis, “It is what it is”. 

I can’t change the situation, but I’m not going to allow it to ruin another aspect of this fandom for me - not when so much of it has been destroyed by circumstances beyond our control. I’m not a bad person, at least not intentionally, and I am willing to admit my mistakes and make amend when I know about them. If that’s not good enough for others, than I’m sorry. By all means, move on if that’s the case.

 As for me - Fuck It. I’m too tired to beg someone to be my friend, not at 48 years old. 

[willow-and-walker-blog]

ALL STARS 3 WISHLIST

REMEMBER THIS IS JUST AN OPINION AND NONE OF THIS IS SET IN STONE Acid Betty: A queen of immense talent, potential, and wit! She serves some AMAZING looks on the runway and only gets better with age. She is a queen that was taken too soon in my opinion. Plus, we all want to see a Trixie/Betty storyline. Akashia: A weird choice for All-Stars but I have been keeping up with Akashia throughout the years since the first season, and she is fierce! She deserves a chance at redemption. Her drag has changed so much (I mean, come on, it's almost been 10 years). Alisa Summers: Another weird choice that many might not remember, but she has a similar case to Akashia's. Her drag has evolved and she is stunning. Not to mention an amazing performer. It would be brilliant to see her back. BenDeLaCreme: I think its unanimous that we all would like to see Ben back. Season 6 Miss Congeniality, and well deserved, she is another queen who went home too soon. Even though there are rumors of her saying no to the show, there are also rumors of her being gone for casting. Only time will tell. Chi Chi DeVayne: She won our hearts on season 8. And she can PERFORM! Her look has evolved and she is a girl who shows how far you can go if you just be yourself, which is a tough skill to master. She would be tough competition. Farrah Moan: Farrah is SO sweet. She added a light-heartedness to season 9. I think that if she came back, knowing what she knows now, she has the chance to go very far! She is so lovable and polished. Definitely deserves a spot on this list. India Ferrah: This queen definitely took her spotlight on Drag Race, and ran with it! She is doing wonderful things. Her look is amazing and her performance is jawdropping. Did you see her perform at the season 9 reunion?! Not only was it fantastic but it boosted her image in the public's eye. Fierce competition for sure. Jasmine Masters: Personally, I LOVE Jasmine. She is so fucking funny. She was perceived as kind of bitchy on her season, but she just kept it real. She has a very good relationship with the girls now and would definitely be a strong competitor second time around. Would love to see her again. Kennedy Davenport: Moving on to Jasmine's best friend, Kennedy! We have all seen how funny, polished, talented, etc. Kennedy is. The top 4 of season 7 was so tight, someone had to go. Unfortunately, it was Kennedy. But I think we will get our Kennedy redemption moment and no one will be ready for it. Kim Chi: No words for this beauty. How could you not want to see her on All Stars? Her look is unlike anything we have ever seen before. She is funny, ditzy, and so sweet. Her vulnerability is so cute and she can go super far. Kimora Blac: She may not know what an adjective is, but she sure can serve a look! She is so sexy, polished, and sweet. She is smart in her own way and could bring lots of opportunity to the show. Laila McQueen: Talk about someone who went home too soon. What she does now is so far from what her airtime represented on the show. Her mug is BEAT and she is so effortlessly funny. I think this time around, if she stays true to herself, she could take it all the way. Lashauwn Beyond: Someone I stanned from the first time I saw her. Lashauwn is a brilliant seamstress. If you follow her social media, it shows. I personally hate the term "robbed", but I can't think of another term to describe it. It's far out there but I hope to see her again. Lineysha Sparx: This girl is a talent that I think has kind of been forgotten by the fandom. She is SO gorgeous. Why wasn't she on All Stars 2? I will never know. But she sure is up there on my list for this next All Stars. Magnolia Crawford: VERY unpopular opinion, but hear me out. She was beaten down by the community, so much that it forced her to quit drag. But when you do some research, you will find that she is super funny and lovable. Almost similar to Jinkx Monsoon (my favorite queen of all time). If she gets back into it, I would love to see what she would do differently this time around. Max: Our (almost) British Dame. A queen that is different from anyone we have seen thus far. She brought something vintage and refreshing to the show, and just keeps getting better. I know I am not alone when I say... Max for All Stars! Milk: Talk about a front runner. She is, again, something that we have only seen once before. She is kind, funny, creative, kooky... the list goes on and on. It is quite possible that she is a lock-in for All Stars 3. Miss Fame: Very shocked to not see this one go all the way! I know how many people were disappointed when we saw her Sashay Away. She is an artist like no other when she picks up that brush. Fame is definitely a worthy contender. Mrs. Kasha Davis: It's always time for Kasha Davis! She may be campy, she may be pretty, and she may be on All Stars 3! I can't even begin to imagine what stops she would pull out this time around. Mystique Summers Madison: Child, let me tell you. Mystique has evolved and is not playing around this time. She turned into such a seasoned queen who could offer so much talent and beauty. I know how unlikely it is but it would be amazing to have her on the show again. Naomi Smalls: I don't think that I have ever seen Naomi Smalls look bad. Her legs are CRAZY long and her look is unreal. She made it to top 2 for a reason. Maybe she will take it all this time. Naysha Lopez: I wasn't sure about this queen at first, but after the show she flourished. Her sense of humor is so down to earth and funny. And she doesn't have to try so hard. Not to mention how gorgeous she is! Nina Bo'Nina Brown: Nina's struggles on her season were so unfortunate, because I was #TeamNina! Her look is something that we have never seen EVER on any queen, whether is be on Drag Race or out of it. Such a misunderstood talent. I know that she doesn't want to do All Stars, but you never know if a queen would change her mind! Ongina: She is one that has been talked about a lot. I think she has a good chance of going far! Sometimes I forget that Ongina is even real because of how cute she is! Her claws are out and she is ready to fight! Pearl: Her look on the show was stunning, and her look after the show is even better! There was some feud with her and Ru on the show. But it's past them now. She could be a possible contender, and boy, would she do great things. One can only hope. Penny Tration: I know that many of you are probably saying, "who?" But trust me on this one. Penny is so funny and her look (in my personal opinion) is so fun! She represents a very classic style of drag that I feel is missing from these past couple seasons. Would love to see what she brings. Stacy Layne Matthews: My personal favorite from season 3. I love Miss Stacy so much, I couldn't put it into words. But I will try. She is so charismatic, talented, beautiful, funny, etc. Why wouldnt you want her on the show? Could a big girl finally take the crown? Tempest DuJour: It doesn't matter how old she is, she is smart! Her style of drag is something I admire so much. She is so lovely and admirable. Please RuPaul! Give me some Tempest! Thorgy Thor: Talk about kooky! That's Thorgy. She was a front runner for me on season 8. I thought she would go farther. Unfortunately, her time was cut short. But I can tell that she and I are both ready for Thorgy part 2. Trinity K. Bonet: There is no doubt in my mind that she wants to come back for an All Stars season. I mean, she tags all her pictures with #TKB4AS3! Her look is so beautiful, and she has grown in a way that not everyone can understand. Love her and hope she comes back again. Trixie Mattel: This is just a given. We all pretty much know that she's on the show. But she deserves it. She has worked so hard. She is maybe the funniest person I have ever seen and her look just keeps getting better and better. If the rumors are true, Trixie may be the one to take it all. Victoria "Porkchop" Parker: If we are on the topic of queens who deserve redemption, lets talk about Porkchop! For being the first queen EVER eliminated, she has left her legacy and her mark on this show. Ru loves her, we love her. This is the time for her to come back. Come one Ru! Vivacious: One of my picks for top 3 on season 6. She definitely went too soon. She is one of the few, true club kids around. She keeps it real and authentic. She brings something new every time. I need some more Vivacious! Willam: Last, but not least... Willam! I think we all need someone to stir the pot, and that would be Willam. Even though WoW hates him, I think he still has a big chance of coming back. I hope and I pray. Who would you like to see come back for AS3?