#kinda excited about the song with jackson wang

[apotatowhenever]

CRAZYBOY first full album - HIP LIFE : POP LIFE

[solastia]

I’m Fine | 1

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Word Count: 3,600

Summary: I'm fine. That's what he's been telling everyone the past two years since he and his soulmate parted ways. 

Genre & Warnings: Soulmate au. Angst. Yoongi is pretty self-destructive at first, so be aware of that. There will be lots of destructive thoughts, drinking, fighting, making drunken mistakes (hint). And I know while you read it you won’t believe me, but this does have a good ending.

A/N: Yes, I have given up trying to make this a one shot. Yoongi wouldn’t cooperate with me, so now this is a series. I’ll try to make it a short series, but it was just too complicated for a one shot. Part of the Love Yourself anniversary collab. Be sure to check out the other authors that participated too! 

For those that are familiar with the picture in the banner and are wondering where his the open knee went, no I did not suddenly become a puritan. Yoongi’s knee got flagged so I had to color it in

@sweet-honey-boy​ is the artistic genius behind the pretty banner

I’m fine. 

Such a common phrase. Meaningless these days, really. Just a couple of words thrown together so you’d have something to respond with when someone else throws out the equally meaningless greeting of “How are you?” 

They don’t really care how you are, they just want to seem like they do. They’ve already zoned out and have their planned response of “Good��� ready and waiting.  

“I’m fine.” 

He mumbled the phrase, shaking the proffered hand of the bride’s cousin as they all waited their turn to go into the room and greet her. It was the same phrase he’d repeated at least twenty times today alone as old friends and family of the bride asked him how he was with pity shining in their eyes. 

The same phrase he’d been using for two whole years since his soulmate broke up with him and moved on with her life. 

*

Yoongi could still remember the first time he’d learned about soulmates. It had been in the second week of his kindergarten class when one of the kids next to him started giggling as his arm slowly began to be filled with doodles. Hearts, smiley faces, and stars soon lined the boy's arm from elbow to wrist. The teacher then decided to use all the kid’s collective excitement to explain about soulmates.

Apparently, there were many different types of soulmates. There were the ones that could write on their skin, like their fellow classmate. There were some that could speak to each other in their heads. Some that had timers on their wrist marking down how long until they met their match. And those were only some of the many ways that their world had that all led to the same idea - finding your soulmate. The person meant to be that one perfect person for you.

Yoongi had gone home that very night and tried to figure out what his type was. He wrote “Hello, my name is Min Yoongi” on his arm, along with a little doodle of Kumamon. Nothing happened. He went to the bathroom and tore off his uniform, searching his skin for any sort of marker or timer, maybe even a tattoo or a bruise that he couldn’t remember getting. His skin remained unblemished beyond a couple of moles. 

Over the next few years, he’d secretly researched and experimented with every soulmate type he could find. He never saw any strings, heard any voices or songs, felt anything out of the ordinary. At times he felt a flicker of fear over the stray thought that maybe he didn’t have one. But that couldn’t be right. Everyone had one, right? 

When his father divorced his mom- who was his soulmate - and left them both for another woman, that was his first lesson that maybe soulmates weren’t all they were cracked up to be anyway. 

*

By the time Yoongi hit college, he already felt like he’d lived three lifetimes. He was now broken and bitter by life, having spent most of his youth working to care for himself and his heartbroken mom. She’d never recovered after his father left. Instead, she became a hollow shell of the loving woman she’d once been, content to sit at home and do the bare minimum to stay alive, mourning her piece of shit “soulmate” that never even bothered to check up on his own son. He had to force her to eat and sleep, to go outside and get some air and sun. He often ran home from school terrified he’d find her dead, but she kept going thanks to him. There were many times over those years that Yoongi had fought not to give up and do something stupid himself. 

Sometimes she’d meet someone during her rare times out alone that would bring a flicker of life back to her eyes, but they usually turned out to be assholes that would pick fights with Yoongi and try to control his vulnerable mother. He was quick to run them off. Yoongi took on any job he could to keep them both fed and housed, even if the rooftop apartment that they’d been forced to move to was crumbling. 

Yoongi hadn’t even planned to go to college, as it had seemed such a far off dream for someone like him. He already worked three jobs just to stay alive; where would he get the money to go to college too? Then his father passed away - some drunk driver, according to his latest paramour - and left Yoongi with more money than he’d ever seen before. Apparently, the old prick had been doing quite well for himself while Yoongi and his mom had been forced to live in squalor. 

So, Yoongi being the practical soul he was, decided that instead of spending it all at once and buying some huge lavish home and three cars he would instead invest in going to college and getting a great job so that he’d never have to be poor or dependant on anyone else ever again. He got his mom set up in a nicer apartment with a caregiver and saved everything else, packing up to go live life for himself for a change. 

*

One thing he’d forgotten about college is that there were people everyfuckingwhere. A whole new group of people curious about his soulmate, where was his soulmate, what was his marker. He’d long ago determined that either his soulmate was dead or the fates had decided his life wasn’t shit enough so they’d not give him one just for shits and giggles. 

So, to shut everyone else up, he decided to show them exactly what he thought of the soulmate system and the belief that you should save yourself for them. He slept around with anyone willing. Didn’t give a fuck if they were taken or not. If they had a soulmate or not. What they were, what they were majoring in, even their fucking names - he didn’t care. 

And with the amount of soulmated people he’d had in and under him, it just further proved his point that soulmates were a shit concept. 

So he pushed the thought of his nonexistent soulmate from his mind, instead focusing his days on getting the best grades he could to ensure the highest paying job, and his nights on fucking, fighting and drinking to his heart's content.

*

As usual, Yoongi’s life was about to be flipped upside down. And it was all Jackson Wang and his stupid party’s fault. 

While he wasn’t a fan of frat boys themselves, Yoongi had to admit that the bastards threw the best parties. Jackson Wang was one of the few frat guys he could tolerate because the guy was too nice to hate, so when the party was at his place, Yoongi was a frequent visitor. The place was packed tonight, and while he didn’t like the crowd, he certainly enjoyed having a nice selection to choose from for his evening entertainment.  

Yoongi leaned against the kitchen counter as he sipped his whiskey. It was a shit brand and a shit year, but was still a rare treat at one of these things that usually served the cheapest beer and fruity crap meant to entice girls into drinking more. Yoongi guessed that his roommate had talked to Jackson about grabbing some to keep Yoongi happy. He appreciated the attempt. 

He hadn’t been planning on going to this party since he still had a report to finish, but his roommate Namjoon claimed he needed the backup. He was convinced one of the members of this frat was his soulmate. His soulmate marker was a birthday, but he claimed he felt funny every time he looked at him. Instead of saying anything to the guy, Yoongi deduced that Namjoon’s plan was to stare at him creepily from across the room. 

“Yoongi hyung, he’s so pretty. Like, super pretty. Don’t you think he’s pretty?” Yoongi guessed he was supposed to be included in the conversation since his name was used, but it sounded more like his friend was thinking out loud. 

“Yeah, he’s not bad. You should go tell him you think he’s pretty. He looks like the type that would appreciate it.” 

“I can’t,” Namjoon whispered. 

“You can. I believe in you,” Yoongi rolled his eyes. 

“No, I mean I really can’t. My feet won’t move.” 

“Oh, Jesus Christ. Fine. Stay here.” 

“Wait! Yoongi, don’t...” 

Yoongi set his cup on the counter and ignored Namjoon’s protests as he strode purposefully into the living room. When he was in front of his target - a pretty man nearly as tall as Namjoon with pillow lips and an eternally amused expression - he sighed wearily. 

“Look. You see that guy trying to hide by the kitchen counter? That’s Namjoon, my roommate. He’s super fucking smart, but also kind of stupid. He’s also kinda like a big ass rottweiler that thinks he’s a lap dog. He thinks you’re his soulmate, but he’s the type that would rather pine from afar for the rest of his life rather than face rejection, so can I ask what your marker is? I realize that’s personal and you can tell me to fuck off.” 

The man’s face went from confusion to amusement and finally settled on something that he was sure a few romantic poets would fight to the death to describe.  

“It’s a birthday. The twelfth of September.” 

Yoongi nodded. “Yeah, that’s him. Go get him. Just remember that’s he’s a lot more sensitive than he lets on. And, you know, the best friend speech. You hurt him I’ll...I dunno. Do something.” 

“Thanks. I’m Seokjin, by the way. I guess I’ll talk to you guys later,” he smiled and went towards the kitchen, the little sway in his hips telling him Namjoon had no chance against that one. The poor lug was currently trying to straighten up and look cool like he hadn’t just been cowering in the kitchen. 

Yoongi snorted and turned away to give them their privacy, looking around the room for someplace to lounge. Before he could leave, one of the girls in the group that Seokjin had been talking with tapped his arm. 

“That was really cool of you. Jin’s always talking about meeting his soulmate, so I’m sure he’s over the moon right now.” 

Yoongi faced the speaker and his breath hitched. He’d seen cuter girls, sure, but...there was...something about this one. He didn’t know what this strange feeling in the pit of his stomach was. Maybe the shitty whiskey was finally getting to him. 

She was looking up at him expectantly and he finally remembered that she’d said something. 

“You’re fucking pretty.” 

What the fuck? He’d meant to say thanks and then maybe try to sweet-talk his way into her pants. Where the fuck had that come from? 

Even her blushing face was cute. He wanted to make a run for it, but at the same time he kinda just wanted to keep looking at her. 

“I wish you were my soulmate.” 

Her squeak of alarm, followed by her hand slapping against her mouth as she stared at him with alarmed eyes led him to a mind-fuck of a conclusion. 

“Well, I think you got your wish,” he mumbled. 

Her hand dropped and even her stunning smile wasn’t enough to quell the growing panic Yoongi felt. She was pretty, and looked nice, and was his soulmate. 

He had a fucking soulmate. 

And thus began what would be the first of the many, many times Yoongi would hurt the person he was supposed to protect the most as he turned tail and ran. 

* 

Yoongi had spent a lot of time in his youth wondering what his soulmate quirk could be. He’d always thought that the ones that could hear each other's music could be cool, or even the ones that could speak telepathically. His friend Taehyung and his soulmate Jimin could write to each other on their skin. Even that could have been neat. 

Yoongi’s super amazing totally not problematic quirk was that he couldn’t fucking lie to his soulmate. 

All those years wondering if his soulmate was dead or if he just didn’t have one, when it was just that he needed to meet them for it to work. He wondered if she’d grown up thinking he was dead too. That thought just made the guilt he felt raise even higher. She’d probably been thrilled that he was alive and in front of her for all of two seconds before he dashed her hopes and dreams running off like he had. 

But here’s the thing. There are universally known facts about him:

Min Yoongi loves sleep. Min Yoongi likes music. Min Yoongi hates soulmates. Min Yoongi lies.  

Sometimes his lies were simply to amuse himself at the expense of his friends. Being sarcastic, making up fake rumors, that kind of thing. No big deal. Sometimes it’s to protect those friends. Telling Taehyung his drawing his great when it looks like Yoongi could do a better job with his toes. Telling Jimin that he could barely notice the giant zit the size of the moon on his forehead. Telling Joon that that girl he’d been hung up on probably got busy, not that Yoongi had warned her to stay the fuck away when she tried to sneak into his bed right after she’d hooked up with Namjoon. 

The problem was that most of his lies are about himself. He tells people he’s fine when he wants to jump off the nearest bridge. He tells Joon he remembered to eat and sleep when he’d really been a filthy goblin working on his project for two days straight. He has an hour-long panic attack in the bathroom and tells people he has IBS. He tells his mother she’s not a burden that ruined his childhood. He tells everyone he’s fine being soulmate-less and he didn’t feel lonely. 

He lies. 

And now the universe is laughing in his face because they’ve presented him with someone he literally can’t lie to. Not to protect himself, not to protect her. There was no way any relationship they tried to have wouldn’t end in disaster. 

The very thought of having to bare himself to someone that much was utterly terrifying...and yet he was still more afraid of the look that Kim Seokjin was giving him from Yoongi’s doorway. 

Namjoon and Seokjin had hit it off disgustingly well, enough so that ‘Jin’ had practically been living in their dorm room for nearly three weeks. He’d turned out to be a cool guy, and Yoongi imagined he would get along with him fairly well if only he’d stop sending him death glares over the breakfast table. 

Except for now Jin’s moved on to glaring at him from his own bedroom door. 

“I’ve had enough, Yoongi. Y/N’s my friend and a sweet girl. I’m tired of seeing her sad. Fix it.” 

“Jin, this isn’t like you and Namjoon, okay? I never wanted a soulmate,” Yoongi sighs, flopping onto his back and covering his eyes with his arm. He just wanted the guy to get the fuck out and leave him to his miserable existence. 

“I don’t really give a fuck,” Jin yelled. 

Yoongi lowered his arm and glanced at Jin, impressed. He hadn’t known the other had it in him. He looked a little ridiculous and red-faced, but still, Yoongi had never heard him curse before. 

“This isn’t just about you, Yoongi. She’s part of it too, whether you like it or not. She thought she didn’t have a soulmate and then you suddenly appear. Now she has a soulmate, but one that’s apparently rejected her. She’s a mess. Fix it.” 

Jin walks towards Yoongi and throws a slip of paper on the bed, staring down at him as haughtily like a rich Korean mother from a drama. Without another word, he leaves and shuts the door as Yoongi picks it up, seeing the number on it. Hers, he assumes. 

He sighs and ruffles his hair. He’s not a total asshole. He supposes he should at least meet with her and tell her why they couldn’t work. 

He punches in the number and sends a text before he can talk himself out of it. 

*

It took them three days to coordinate their schedules enough to meet (or the both of them had tried to push it forward as much as possible), and now they were finally sitting across from each other in neutral territory. Yoongi had figured meeting for a cup of coffee was probably cliche, but it was a safe choice and was somewhere he felt comfortable. It helped that Taehyung was a barista here and he would probably go along with it if Yoongi needed help escaping. 

Yoongi gripped his cup of black coffee hard, gathering the courage to speak to her. Y/N looked tired, and maybe a little like she’d lost weight in her face, like she hadn’t been eating well. The thought that he’d upset her that much added another layer of guilt to the growing pile in his chest with her name on it. 

“First of all, I wanted to say sorry for running out on you the other night. That was cowardly of me and kind of a shithead thing to do. So...sorry,” he mumbled, staring at the table. 

He looked up again when she sighed. 

“Thank you. That hurt me a lot,” she cringed, like that hadn’t been what she’d intended to say, and he supposed it wasn’t. Their soulmate quirk was a difficult one. 

He ground his teeth as he fought the scratching in his throat, trying his best to word things in a way that wouldn’t scar her for life. 

“Look, I just don’t trust this whole soulmate thing. The idea that your happiness revolves around this single person is bullshit. And...I’m terrified,” he grits out, hating how vulnerable he sounded. 

She nods, “Yeah, it’s pretty scary. But, I don’t really think it’s about your happiness revolves around someone. More like, there’s this person that’s meant to help you become the best version of yourself, and maybe you can find your happiness together.” 

Yoongi scoffs, stopping himself from saying anything sarcastic with a long sip from his cup. She was still so naive. 

She chews her lip and suddenly there’s a look in her eyes that makes his pause and pay attention. 

“It’s just...okay, so I thought you were dead most of my life, like I’m sure you thought I was. I thought that all of my future relationships were just going to be me being used as a placeholder until their soulmate comes along. And then maybe I’d find someone else who didn’t have a soulmate and we’d settle for each other. I thought that my chance at finding actual love was gone, and then you...,” she sighs and runs a hand through her hair. “You show up in front of me, being all fucking gorgeous and funny and a great friend - and alive. Sure, we probably have the shittest soulmate quirk and the fact that I’m rambling all this is proof of that, but Yoongi, you’re alive. I’m alive, and we’re soulmates. We have a chance. Can’t you at least give us a chance?” 

Some part of him wanted to warn her about what she was getting into. He knew he would hurt her. He knew he would fuck everything up. But the truth was...he wanted to try. Something told him she was worth it. Was that just part of the whole soulmate brainwashing bullshit? He didn’t know, but the thought of leaving her behind today and never looking back felt wrong. 

Yoongi sighs wearily as he observes her glassy eyes, knowing that this wouldn’t be the first time he’d make her tear up but unable to stop the words from leaving his mouth. 

“Yeah. Let’s take a chance.” 

[chamomillles]

hi do u have any advice for getting into kpop <33 i’m looking to get into it as i’ve never tried

!!!! how exciting um ok so my advice is gonna be a lil biased (lol) but hopefully you will like it!

i think the first first FIRST band you should get into is shinee. they really never missed with any album and their solo songs are also unbelievably good (also they are the first band i got into in middle school). some songs i recommend are:

- taemin: criminal, idea, flame of love, move, sexuality

- key: one of those nights, the duty of love, show me

- jonghyun: moon, grease, red, crazy, end of a day

-shinee: evil, orgel, shift, amigo, hitchhiking, love sick, view, lucifer, and sherlock

nct/wayv is also pretty good, same with exo! both make kinda hyperpop/rap songs idk how to describe them but they are very very good. monsta x is really good (wonho’s solo debut is one of the best things to happen to me). OH and i almost forgot got7 is also very good

- nct: mad dog, limitless, nectar (wayv), 0 mile, baby don’t like it, regular

- exo: tempo, love shot, going crazy, white noise, artificial love, lucky one, el dorado, and playboy (!!!)

- monsta x/wonho: open mind (plsplsplsplspls listen to this i have so many feelings about this song), shine forever, oi, from zero, love killa (their most recent song)

- got7: lullaby, focus on me (jus2), 100 ways (jackson wang), paradise, just right (lol), never ever

ok for girl groups, red velvet and twice are kinda of the big two that i know a lot of people start off with, but i also recommend itzy, everglow and loona!

- rv: monster, naughty, psycho, kingdom come, zoo, bad dracula, time slip

- twice: queen, tt, signal, cheer up, oxygen, cry for me, hell in heaven

ok sorry this is kinda long but yea! i hope this helps!

[billie-harper7]

Albums of 2019

Thankyou so much @ayixha!!

It’s taken me so long to choose only 9 because there’s been over 30 albums I’ve loved so much this year and couldn’t decide between. I’ve narrowed it to one per artist but even still, it was very difficult😂

I also apologise for this being v v v long, you only have to list your 9 favourites but I got carried away ranting about them, as per. You can just scroll past if you want😂

1) City Lights - BAEKHYUN

My favourite album of the year. No doubt. Despite being a mini album with only 6 songs, I love each so much and could never get tired of them. An album I can listen to in every mood. Going out out? Going to sleep? Getting ready on a morning? Trying to study? Relaxing? It works (for me, anyway).

Not what I expected from his solo music after discovering SuperM & EXO but very pleasantly surprised. So smooth, so chilled?? Sexy? Absolute heaven. Baek’s voice is just something else entirely. Idk man, this album’s just a lot.

Favourite song/s: them all, I couldn’t honestly choose any in particular.

2) SuperM The 1st Mini Album - SuperM

I was hesitant when I first saw all the promos for SuperM but when I actually listened to the album?? Wow wow wow. All 5 of the songs are so catchy, listen to this album once and you’ll most likely be singing, humming or dancing to them for days. Even the 2 instrumentals are lovely to listen to.

My brother who hates kpop refers to Jopping as 'the one with the cars and helicopter' and doesn't mind this song at all which says a lot (I've decided it's my gateway to get him into more lol).

I’m also very thankful that this album introduced me to 4 other groups and many albums this year, 3 of which made it onto this list.

Favourite song/s: also them all? Although Jopping, I Can’t Stand The Rain & Super Car are my most listened to this year. 

3) April, and a flower - CHEN

I literally discovered this album about three weeks ago?? I also did not expect Chen’s solo works to sound like this after listening to EXO but it’s honestly perfect. 

I don’t normally listen to this kind of music but his voice is so delicate and soothing? He could sing absolutely anything. Every song is so beautiful and calming, the perfect playlist for relaxing and/or falling asleep to.

Favourite song/s: Flower, Beautiful goodbye & I’ll be there

4) The Balance - Catfish and the Bottlemen

I kinda stopped listening to CATB for a while when I found kpop as I was constantly discovering new artists. Around September/October I disconnected with kpop for a little while and when I found this album I listened to it for weeks on end.

Not a single song to skip and I happily listen to on a loop. Also one of my go to albums when I’m fancying a change (or when I’m just missing their sound).

Favourite song/s: Longshot, 2all, Sidetrack, Encore.

5) OBSESSION - EXO

My first EXO comeback and boy, they did not disappoint. The title track is absolutely phenomenal and I’ve had it stuck in my head since its release (how can you not?) but the entire album is such a great listen. It’s just, different? I can’t even explain how but it’s so distinct and exciting, I love it.

Also the most intriguing group I've discovered this year with all their different sounds, personalities, sub units and solo works, very looking forward to everything's that's coming up next year.

Favourite song/s: Obsession, Trouble, Ya Ya Ya & Baby You Are.

6) MIRRORS - Jackson Wang

An emotional rollercoaster of an album that I’m so grateful to have been on. It has songs that’ll make you want to cry (BULLET TO THE HEART, ON THE ROCKS, I’m talking about you), songs that’ll have you dancing and feeling like that bitch, songs that’ll make you soft, songs that’ll get you thinking.

I feel like he put so much into this album, so thankyou Jackson Wang. I love you.

Favourite song/s: BULLET TO THE HEART, ON THE ROCKS & DWAY!

7) MAP OF THE SOUL: PERSONA - BTS

The first kpop album I ever listened to (and bought!!). I found BTS as the second teaser for Boy With Luv was released and without them, I wouldn’t be on here and have come across so many lovely people. Nor would I have discovered all the music and artists I now couldn’t go without, so this album is very special to me.

Probably one of my most played albums of the year too, I love each song so much and it never fails to get me all giddy and hyper like a child (don't put Boy With Luv on around me unless you wanna see me rip the choreo to shreds).

Favourite song/s: I choose them all.

8) TREASURE EP.FIN: All To Action - ATEEZ

This was also my first ATEEZ comeback and having waited what felt like forever, it was so, so worth it. While their other 2 2019 albums could’ve made it onto my list, this is by far my favourite.

I remember listening for the first time going ‘this song is my favourite’ then played the next song like ‘nevermind, this is it’, which happened for practically each track.

Even the 3 shorter tracks are amazing (I don’t know what you call them, there are words so I can’t call them instrumentals?? But you know what I mean).

AND I ALSO GOT ATEEZ TICKETS FOR LONDON SO CATCH ME SOBBING WATCHING THEM PERFORM LIVE, LIKE WHAT IS HAPPENING???

Favourite song/s: WONDERLAND, MIST, WIN & SUNRISE.

9) The Book Of Us: Entropy - DAY6

Another album I only really found last month (through Sweet Chaos). I’m pretty new to kpop this year and I’ve not heard anything like DAY6 before, I’m in love. My housemates compare their sound to McFly and honestly, I can hear it. 

I cannot praise them and this album enough. I’ve a feeling I’ll be listening to this one years from now. 

Favourite song/s: I honestly can’t pick ahh, but Sweet Chaos is my most played. 

And here’s the other albums I wanted to put into this list (so you can see the stuggle I had picking only 9 oops):

Divinely Uninspired To A Hellish Extent (extended ver.) - Lewis Capaldi

MTV Unplugged Live - DMA’S

Without Fear - Dermot Kennedy

Call My Name - GOT7

TREASURE EP.3: One To All - ATEEZ

TREASURE EP.2: Zero To One - ATEEZ

FOLLOW - FIND YOU - Monsta X

Take 2. We Are Here - Monsta X

Dear my dear - CHEN

Tagging:  @bangtanbabeloveyourself @tenw1n @rkai800bts @mystically-mysterious @starsinyourheart23 @memeofthesoul @nerdishfeels @roo-roo-girl @walewalentina @trashlord-007 @infiresmaanyeah @muraae @mitch-yy @ayixha @honeyprince-yoongi

[itsallabigmess]

50 Questions Tag

I was tagged by @prettywordsyouleft . Thanks for saving me from my boredom, love.

1. What takes too much of your time?

Work. I live too far from it so it takes around 2 hours to get there and almost 3 hours to get back home.

2. What makes your day better?

Watching movies, writing, eating chocolate.

3. What’s the best thing that happened to you today?

I kinda dyed half of my hair grey. And I ate Japanese food.

4. What fictional place would you like to go to?

I never got over the fact that Genovia isn’t a real place so I would just go there if I could.

5. Are you good at giving advice?

People tend to come to me for advice so I guess I am?

6. Do you have any mental illness?

Depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety, panic disorder... the whole package

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

No.

8. What musician inspired you the most?

Jackson Wang. But also Yoongi and Namjoon, from BTS (duh).

They inspire me in different ways, but mostly because of how hard they work, how they don’t give up on the things they want to do, and for Jackson, how he isn’t afraid to show his feelings... They also remind me that men can be good.

9. Have you ever fallen in love?

Yep. I do not recommend it.

10. What’s your dream date?

I guess the dream is to be asked on a date. Just take me someplace where we can have a nice conversation and maybe eat something nice.

11. What do others notice about you?

That I don’t talk much. I am constantly teased for it. Also, people always tell me they were scared to talk to me at first because I look too serious. It’s not my fault that I have a resting bitch face (I actually have been trying to smile more and I just look goofy). I’m also very shy and an introvert so that doesn't help.

12. What is an annoying habit you have?

I eat my depression and anxiety away. So I’m constantly putting junk food inside my body and now it got to the point that is making me sick, so i’m trying to change that.

13. Do you still talk to your first love?

Yes, we are good friends now.

14. How many ex’s do you have?

3

15. How many songs are in your playlist?

Spotify just told me I can't add any more songs to my playlist so... a lot.

16. What instruments can you play?

I knew a bit o piano and drums when I was a kid but that’s it.

17. Who do you have the most pictures of?

My dog, Layla. And Jackson. So yeah, my phone is filled with puppy photos.

18. Where would you like to go before you die?

Honestly, there is no place in the world I don’t want to visit. But Italy and South Korea are currently on the top of my list.

19. What is your zodiac?

I’m a Pisces (with a Virgo Moon, and a rising Capricorn which means I’m a fucking mess).

I also just found out I’m the year of the Snake (’sup Bambam). 

20. Do you relate to it?

Way too much, especially the too sentimental, too stubborn part

21. What is happiness to you?

Being in peace with myself - which doesn’t happen often. Being able to do the things I want to do and making other people happy.

22. Are you going through anything right now?

I’m going through my life, does that count? ‘Cause honestly, I’m surprised I made this far.

My depression is kicking hard lately so I’m just trying my best to get out of it.

23. What’s the worst decision you’ve ever made?

Traveling with my ex-best friend. But it was also good cause it made me realize that I was her friend but she wasn’t mine.

24. What’s your favourite store?

Miniso. Their underwear is really comfortable and great for sleeping. I also love bying notebooks there.

25. What’s your opinion on abortion?

I’m in favor although I’m not sure I would be able to do it. But I don’t think my personal feelings should be applied to other people.

26. Do you keep a bucket list?

Mentally I do.

27. Do you have a favourite album?

More than one. 111 by Tiziano Ferro, Lemonade by Beyonce, Love Yourself: Tear by BTS, Suck It and See and AM by Arctic Monkeys, MADE by BIGBANG, Verse 2 by JJ Project, 7 for 7 and Eyes on You by GOT7, Dawn by The Rose...

The list goes on...

28. What do you want for your birthday?

Be able to travel somewhere new.

29. What are most people’s first impression of you?

Maybe that I’m antisocial? I don’t think anyone ever told me their impressions of me.

30. What age do you seem according to most people?

I’m 30 but people think I’m on my early 20s. Which is funny cause people also thought that when I was on my teen years.

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping?

Under my pillow.

32. what word do you say the most?

Fuck.

33. What’s the oldest age you would date?

I don’t think I have a limit in my mind. I don’t really care about age in that aspect, although I always liked dating younger people.

34. What’s the youngest age you would date?

So, I’m not sure about this one. Like I said, I always liked dating people younger than me. But I’m not sure if I would be able to date someone that is “too young”. I’m 30 and I don’t know if I would feel comfortable dating someone on their early 20s. But at the same time, I feel very attracted to idols around that age so...(’sup Mingi)

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you?

Something related to arts.

36. What’s your favourite music genre?

Pop (so, K-pop), rock, indie music.

37. If you could live in any country in the world, where would it be?

South Korea, I’m quite obsessed with the idea of living there. But also in Italy.

38. What is your current favourite song?

Focus on Me - JUS2 | Seesaw - BTS | Blah - PLT | Say My Name - Ateez

39. How long have you had this blog for?

Since 2011 ( but I had another tumblr before that).

40. What are you excited for?

For all the concerts I’ll be watching this year. Especially BTS, Monsta X, Muse, Arctic Monkeys and Twenty One Pilots (and if I get the tickets, Weezer, Foo Fighters, H.E.R and Pink!)

41. Are you a better talker or listener?

Listener.

42. What is the last productive thing you did?

I took a shower about an hour ago (believe me, when I’m down, even taking a shower is a success) and I wrote around 500 words for my next fanfic.

43. What do you want for Christmas?

To be hugged for a long time by someone that loves me.

44. What class do you get the best grades in?

I was always good with languages and history.

45. On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling right now?

4

46. What can you see yourself doing in 10 years?  

I not even sure if I’ll last the year. But maybe... living in another country. ( I really hate where I live).

47. When did you first get your heartbreak?

Oh, my heart was constantly broken since I was a child - thanks to my family.

48. At what age do you want to get married?

Haha.

49. What career did you want to have as a child?

I wanted to be a writer and a dancer.

50. What do you crave right now?

Affection. Like, seriously, I’ve been feeling incredibly lonely lately.

I tag @jalapeno-princess , @nicelegsjackson , @ahgase55g7 , @enderkate , @jinyoungmoans , @this-song-thats-only-for-you , @peabodyrose , @peachyyugy , @illbetheresomehow and anyone else who wants to do it :)

[springomelas]

GOT7′s reaction to listening to a song they made about you, for the first time.

 .A/N: I tried to make this all on point, so these are all songs that the members actually made, mostly just lryics. Enjoy! requests are open. <3 

!Disclaimer!: None of the gifs belong to me credit to their rightful owners. 

Mark Tuan (Let Me)

  “I see you reflected in today’s sunlight                                                                  You are crazily radiant                                                                                    You plant the sun in my heart                                                                      Let’s you and I be together today” 

     Mark and the boys had been working hard trying to make the best music they could, he had been working so much you hadn’t had some time together in a while. You were excited seeing as the album was coming out soon and you would get to hear all the new music Mark the rest of GOT7 had made, even through Mark may be even more busier then usual because of all the promotions, fanmeets, and lots of other things that came with promotions.

You had been having a usual night till Mark showed up at your place and decided to suprise you, since, of course he had missed you too. You guys sat down happy and then he decided to let you listen to one song after you had begged for about thirty mintues. He pulled out his laptop and quickly typed in his password and the name of the file.

“You want headphones, babe?” He asked looking over at you with stary eyes.

“oh...No, it’s okay.” you said flashing a smile.

“okay” he said with a cute smile and then pressing the play button. You moved your gaze from him to his laptop while he watched you. He kept watching you as you listened, he loves to watch your innocent smile everytime you heard a new song by his group or him. After the song was finished you looked back into his loving and warm eyes that were already starring at you.

“I love it, who made it?” You asked excited from the bright upbeat lryics.

“I did, do you actually like it?” He asked rubbing the back of his neck with a shy smile.

“I love it, it’s so good, I can jam to it.” You said with a big smile.

“I couldn’t think of what to write, and then you texted me if I wanted to come over and watch a movie, and then it hit me.”

“What hit you?” You said while running your hand through his hair and looking at how soft and smooth it went through.

“How much I love you.” He said with a smile that broke lose. This isn’t the first time he’s told you he loves you, but he still said it with a shy boyish smile.

Im Jaebum (Teenager)

“Wonder why I’m like this when I’m with you I’m constantly excited           Things in front of my eyes looks new                                                             You brighten even to the deep part of my heart                                           Yeah baby you driving me crazy”

           With GOT7 having a comeback, that means Jaebum is very busy with practice and producing. You decided if Jaebum didn’t have time to see you, you would have to go to him. Knowing it would be even longer until you saw him again because promoting is worse then when he prepares for the comeback. You made sure you looked really good. You had made him a little lunch box, knowing he probably hasn’t eaten much cause he’s either busy or too tired. You made sure you had everything and then left your place. 

     Once you made it to the JYP buliding you made your way to the door and went in to the desk to get a pass, they only time you didn’t need one is when you’re a idol or trainee. The woman remembered you quickly and gave you a pass. Since this is a new buliding you had to ask what floor was what and she gladly gave you the information, which you thanked her for and then went on your way. After you had finally made it to the floor you kinda had to look around until you found a door labled ‘GOT7′. You knocked on the door and it was pulled open by Jackson.

“OH, Y/N YOU’RE HERE, IT FEELS LIKE FOREVER.” He said taking you into a big hug.

“I’ve missed you too Jackson, it has been so long, you need to come over soon.” 

“For sure.” He said letting go of you. “Y/N is here” he called out to the group. They all started to come  up to giving you hugs and greeting you with smiles. Last to come was Jaebum. All the boys seemed to exit the room to give you guys so time.

“Awwwww, my baby, I missed you.” He said hugging you very tight, taking the air from you. 

“I brought you food.” You let out and his grip on you loosened once he heard the wheeze of words you had tried to speak.

“Come sit, while I eat you can have a speical sneak peek at a song I made.” He said pullling you by your hand to a couch.

“Yes! I was hoping you would let me.” You said with a light laugh. You pulled out the lunch box you had made for him while he typed on his phone pulling up the song. He handed you his phone and you handed him his lunch box. He started to eat while watching you as you listened to his song. 

      You liked the beat and overall feel of the song, the lryics made it even better, if that was possible. Even after it was over you wanted to relisten to it.

¨What did you think of it?¨ He asked after he had swallowed the food he had in his mouth.

¨Absoultely love it,  I know you make amazing music, but like damn, this fire, expect it to be blasting at place everytime you come over.

¨Well babe, you are gonna have to wait till itś released.¨ He said his eyes filled with love while he ruffled yout nicely done hair.

Jackson Wang (Dawn Of Us)

 "Keep that addicting smile that you have                                                    You're my own, no doubt for sure."

     Jackson had invited you over in the mist of his busy schedule, he said you could probably only be over for about a hour before he had to leave, you could stay and wait for him to come home, but that would take hours and plus you also have things you need to do. You knocked on the door of his apartment and the door instantly open with him standing infront of you with a tried smile.

"How's it going bubs?" You asked going in for a big hug, with a even bigger grin. He accepted the hug quickly with his own toothy smile.

"Busy, but fun, how about you?" He said breathing in your scent while you spoke.

"It was kinda sad and boring without you, but I'm very happy right now." You said tighting your hold on him. 

"Come on in, my dear." He said with the smile you had been desperately missing.

"Wow what a gentleman." You said with a slight smirk while also stepping into his apartment andgoing straight to his couch. "You really have the most comfortable couch ever." You let out cuddling into the couch and waiting for him to join you, and he did after he laughed at you and got a bottle of water from his frigde.

"How many times have I said I'll give it to you, I'll even pay for it to be moved and everything." He said falling onto the couch with you. It is true he had said he'd give it to you if you wanted.

"Then there would be no reason to come over ever again." You said with a small chuckle as well as him.

"I guess Iĺl have to keep it forever."

"I guess so...." You said with a lop-sided grin.

"So you wanna listen to my new song? I'll let you listen, if you want, you can even tell me what you think about it." He said taking hold of your hand and smoothing over it with his thumb.

"Woah, I get to hang out with you and hear your new song, whata blessing, I must have saved the country in my last life." He laughed at you and began to pull out his phone so he could show you.

"Be honest, I won get hurt or anything." He said with a encougreing smile.

      As the song begun you paid attention to the best, lryics and his voice. The more it played the more you fell in love with it. When it came to a end you had a wide grin while you looked at him.

"You made this, and I date you, so I can say I date a actual legend." You said and caused him to laugh a loud and happy laugh.

"So you like it?" He asked once he had calmed down.

"Nope." You said and as soon as his dropped and he quickly put on a fake smile to mask his real emotions, you decided you wouldn't tease him. So with a light laugh you elbowed him and spoke again. "I loved it Jackson, one of my favortie songs ever, by far." You said and he instantly looked up with a real, and bright smile.

"You scared me for a second there Y/N."

"You really thought I wouldn't like it?" You asked shocked slightly.

"I mean yeah, I really care about your opinion" He confessed looking down with a shy smile.

"Well, Jackson, I love the song and you."

"And I love you Y/N, this song was made about you, if you couldn't tell." He said while resting his head on your shoulder basking in the time he has right now with you.

Park Jinyoung (paradise)

[Jinyoung and BamBam did these lryics but I couldn´t find many songs for Jinyoung that fit this theme, so I went with this one (: ]

“So dangerous, you can see my heart, it’s see-through                                   So beautiful, you’re stealing my line of vision                                                  So dangerous, you’re driving me crazy baby                                                Even your smallest gestures, I’m done”

       When Jinyoung randomly sent you a file and said to facetime him before watching it, you were kinda shocked. He never really is the type to do supirses, let alone one so out of the blus and not even telling you, you had a supirse coming your way. You instantly facetimed him wanted badly to see what he had sent you.

“That was fast, you must be excited to see what I sent.” He said with a laugh that made his eyes crinkle and your heart skip a beat.

“Yeah well you’re not much of a supirse person, so when you do one and don’t even tell you doing one it makes me more exicted.” You said with a pout.

“Okay, let’s do this quick I have to go soon, I’m in the middle of a photoshoot.” He explained with a wide smile. You quickly went to your email on your computer and opened it to the email with the attachment.

“Give me a good reaction.” He said with a thumbs up.

“Will do.” you responed and clicked the file as it began to play.

     You soon realized it’s a song, and it has to be from the new album because youe never heard it before. Everything about the song drew you in and you wanted to listen to it on repeat until you could recite it by memory.

“From your reaction I’m gonna assume you liked it.” He said with a light chuckle, and you looked over into your camera.

“I loved it, did you make it?” You asked waiting for a reply.

“Yep, and guess who inspried it?” He said with a small smirk.

“Me!!!!” You exclaimed while he just smiled and nodded at you. Seeing you this happy as well, it made all the hard work he put in worth it.

Choi Youngjae (Hesitate)

“When given the chance I wander around you  Like a habit, when I see you  It makes me smile.  What should I do?  My heart is going ahead of itself on the thought of you,  My head is flustered today too.”

     Youngjae always made sure that you two could at least talk once a day, but since they were having a comeback he was even more busy, so that means you would even be lucky to get a phone call. What shocked you most was when he called you over at three in the morning because he finally had some time. Even through you were basically dead and very, very tried you hopped up and basically ran to his place.

“Sorry for calling you over so late, or rather, early.” He said with a happy laugh and his arms open wide for you.

“It’s okay, at least I get some time with you.” You said going into his ams. He hugged you tight and made sure you could breath comterably.

“Come on” He said grabbing your hand and leading you to his room. You instantly ran and laid on his bed. You loved how comterable and soft it is, and most important it smiles s much like him.

“I missed you, honey.” He said with a sigh running after you onto his own bed.

“How’s the album going?” You asked while he cuddled into you making your heart speed up and make you feel all warm and giddy.

“You wanna listen to a track I made?” He asked already knowing you and the meanings behind your questions.

“You firgured me out.” You said with a  small chuckle. He got out of the bed and grabbed his laptop and carried it back to you. He logged in and then found the file. With the click of his finger the song was playing and filling your ears with delight. It gave you that Youngjae feel that you loved and made the over all song even better. Once it was finished you turned to him with a huge smile.

“Wow, prehaps one of the best songs I’ve ever heard.” After the sentance left your lips his smile grew three times more wide.

“Wah, that’s amazing, I’m so happy you like it.¨

“Anything you make I will love.¨ He laughed and closed his computer and tossed it to the bottom of the bed before he attacked you with a huge hug and a kiss attack on your face which had you giggling and at your happeist.

BamBam (The Reason)

“Only your smile can move me  The reason my day starts out great  Your appeals make me smile  No matter where I go it makes me feel that I’m with you”

      BamBam is normally goofy and funny guy so when he just shows up at your door with flowers and a goofy smile, you couldn’t be mad that he just showed up out of the blue.

“I brought you flowers.” He said holding them out to you after you had let him in.

“I can see....” You said with a smile and reaching out to take them. “They smell amazing, it seems like you bought these at a actual flower shop.” You said then turned to go the kitchen to find a nice vase. “So what brings you by, my love?” 

“I missed you and I haven’t really had time to see you.” He explained and you could feel him close behind you as you were unwrapping the flowers to put them in the nice vas you had found.

“Ah.” You let out “Is the comeback going good?” And finally he had wrapped his arms around you and rested his head on your shoulder.

“It’s going prefect, I even made a song for the album.” 

“Can I take a listen?¨ You asked and turned around wrapping your arms around him and cuddling into him.

“Sure, you wanna listen right now?” He asked with a bright smile. You pulled back with a wide smile still having your arms around him.

“Yes, please.” You said and he gave you a quick kiss on your lips before giving a response.

“Anything for you my dear.” He said and pulled your arms with him to your living room and sitting right on the couch. He held your hand the whole time while he typed on his phone. After a few more seconds he gve his phone over for you and you pressed the play button. The song instantly started and you were already in love with the beat when the lryics started. You bopped your head throughout the song which caused him to laugh.

“That is a amazing song, how did you make it?”

“Well I thought of a special someone and it just came to me.”

“This song is about me?” You asked shocked 

“Well yes of course, who else would make me write cheesy things?” He said with a light laugh.

Kim Yugyeom (No One Else)

“Girl I want to fill my eyes with you                                                               So that I won’t forget this moment                                                               Like always I only remember you.”

      You couldn’t believe when Yugeom blew you off to sleep. Of course you wanted him happy and healthly, but this was the fourth date in two weeks he told you last mintue he couldn’t come. You undertsood the comeback and him being tried from all the work, but you were now mad at him. You had told many people you couldn’t hang out because you had a date, or even your family had invited you over to spend some time, like watch a moive and eat, but still you had to tell them you had a date with Yugeom. You love him, you just wish that if he wasn’t gonna come he would tell you beforehand, or if he knew he didn’t have time, he shoulc have told you instead of agreeing.

“Kin Yugeom, are you serious? This is the fourth time, you have to be kidding me, right?” You said into your phone getting more upset and disappointed.

“I really wish I was Y/N, but I was told last mintue I had to go, and when I mentioned the date they told me I would be back on time, that’s why I didn’t tell you.”

“Where are you?” You asked but it was more like a command.

“I’m on my way back to Seoul, but I won’t be back till past one in the morning.” You sighed at the news and held your head in one of your hands.

“Alright, whatever. Don’t call me, I need some time to chill or else I’m gonna snap and say some stupid stuff.”

“Babe-” He was cut off after you had pressed the ‘end call’ button. You sucked up the angry sad tears that wanted to ecaspe. For the rest of the night you took a shower, cleaned and laid in bed watching movies till you fell asleep.

     It was about three days and Yugyeom hadn’t called at all or even sent a text which worried you slightly. He always made sure he at least sent a text to let you know how he was doing or what he was working on. Once the day was over and you sat on your couch looking at phone wondering if he was upset at you or sad, or maybe if you should just send him a text. You sat starring at your phone for about 15 mintues when it dinged and you instatly grabbed it and logged in. It was Yugyeom, finally. All he sent was a link to spotify. you clicked on it and the song started to play while you just listened. Every lyric was filled with his never ending love for you, and you could tell. Everytime you heard his voice you smiled wider, you already knew he was the one who wrote it just from the words that were being sang and rapped. After the song was finished you called Yugyeom tears in your eyes and going down your cheeks, you truly felt bad for how you had treated him, and that you were being petty and waiting for him to call or text you, instead of doing it yourself.

“I’m sorry, baby” You said as soon as the line picked up.

“Wait, Y/N, are you crying?” He asked, his seeming a little panicked.

“Yeah” You said with a snifle. “I just feel so bad for being all petty and not calling or texting you.” You let out while also letting out some tears from your eyes.

“Awwwwww, Honey, it’s fine, really, I was blowing you off after I had made promises, so really it was my falut, don’t feel bad.” His words were simple yet comforting and made you feel a little better. “If your still crying by the time I come over, I’ll be forced to tackle you.” You laughed and wupped away tears.

“You’re coming over?”

“Yup, right now.” Panic spred through you as you realized your apartment is a mess and you look like a mess as well.

“Oh, okay, I gotta go through.”

“Are you gonna attemp to clean up before I come over, and change and stuff?” He asked with a laugh.

“You know too much.”

[zzaehyunzz]

Icebreaker Challenge

Saw this somewhere and I wanted to try it so here goes!

1. What’s your name? My name is kinda long but I go by Nic.

2. How did you get into Kpop? My sister made me listen to DBSK’s Mirotic and everything started from there.

3. Original bias group(s)? DBSK for quite awhile before I got into B2ST (now known as Highlight).

4. Current bias group(s)? NCT and GOT7 !!

5. Favorite song/album from original bias group? Miroticcccccc 

6. Favorite song/album from present bias group? NCT 2018 Empathy (album) & GOT7′s If You Do (song)

7. First bias(es)? Kim Jaejoong, Yang Yoseob 

8. Current bias(es) or UB? NCT - Jung Jaehyun, Johnny Seo GOT7 - Park Jinyoung, Jackson Wang

9. Favorite Solo Artist(s)? Heize! 

10. Favorite performance of your bias group (MV and/or Live performance)? NCT’s Black on Black! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CYH4F1KCw8)

11. Favorite picture(s) of your bias(es)? Jung Jaehyun (because he looks very boyfriend-y here hehe & it’s my lockscreen)

(he looks so ethereal here wtf la)

(he looks so dreamy here)

 (he looks so soft and fluffy here hehehehe)

  Johnny Seo (because he looks very boyfriend-y here too HAHA)

(because he looks extremely hot here)

(and here)

(HERE TOO)

12. Favorite gif(s) of your bias(es)?

13. Favorite Kpop moments? (interactions between groups, variety shows...) - When Monsta X’s Wonho suddenly complimented Jaehyun for being very handsome during NNN and that he was shocked(?) at how good-looking Jaehyun is (same tbh) 

- When Johnny lowered his mic (with wires) so that the girl-group wouldn’t trip over it while crossing

- When NCT was on weekly idol and they tried to explain to Dony about their team’s concept 

- When Jinyoung went to eat meat without Jackson and Jackson felt the betrayal and it happened again recently LOL

- When BTOB’s Changseob reached out his hand during a fansign and the fan walked away without a handshake and he remembered that fan at the next fansign HAHAHAHAHA

14. Which idol would you name your child after? Def Jung Jaehyun. Jeffrey for my son’s english name and  (Yoon Oh)允午 in chinese :’) 

15. First Kpop song you ever heard? Replay - SHINee

16. First MV you ever saw? Replay - SHINee

17. Favorite Kpop song(s) to dance to? Why Don’t You Know - Chungha Genie - SNSD (because i learnt it with some friends)  Black on Black - NCT (i dance it in my head because i’m not amazing) BOSS - NCT U (I also dance to this in my head) Touch - NCT 127

18. Favorite Kpopo song(s) to sing along with? Timeless - NCT U Gift - Melomance Cherry Bomb - NCT 127 

19. Favorite ships/OTP? JunSeob, JinSon, JonJae, YunJae

20. How did Kpop change your life? I took up Korean on my own because of Kpop. I didn’t come from a well-to-do family and Korean lessons are extremely expensive where I live. For me to be one step closer to Kpop, I actually studied it on my own, with the help of the internet, k-dramas and variety shows. I’m on my 8th year and I think it’s safe to say that I can converse freely with Koreans and I can also understand most, if not all, of the Korean dramas/variety shows without subs. If I hadn’t gotten into Kpop, I wouldn’t have had the motivation to take on another language considering I’m already bilingual. But now I’m multilingual hehe !! 

Also, Kpop led me into Kbeauty and because of that, I really pay attention to my skin. I don’t have perfect, glass skin but at least I’m satisfied with it. And my make-up skills really has improved ever since hahahaha looking at an eye-shadow palette gets me excited to try out new looks now!

Last but not least, it’s brought a lot of happiness to me! Whenever I’m sad/feeling down, kpop videos never fail to make me laugh. I may be too old to be into Kpop (as it is in the society I live in) but honestly, I’ve never felt prouder of myself that I managed to gain so much from getting into Kpop. 

[hallo-spaceb0y]

Getting to know me tag!

Thank you @chans-baby-girl for tagging me, this looks fun :)

1. When is your birthday?

May 11th

2. What is your favourite colour?

Pink, brown and grey

3. What is your lucky number?

13

4. How tall are you?

166cm, so 5'5?

5. How many pairs of shoes do you own?

I'm a sucker for shoes, I'd say about ten?

6. Favourite song(s)?

MOONSHOT by N.Flying, Cassette by DEMIAN, Jogging by LUCY, In My Room by SHINee, LMLY by Jackson Wang, RED by The Rose, Moon by BTS, Would You Mind by PRETTYMUCH, RED BLACK by Kazuo

(I'll try remember to add my spotify to my linktree there are too many)

7. Favourite movie?

Howl's Moving Castle all the way that hits different every time and I have the fattest crush on Howl

8. What would be your ideal partner?

I actually was thinking about this a couple nights ago.

So, LOOKS wise, I tend to like short boys who look like a gust of winf would blow them away, or girls who could crush my head between their thighs without breaking a sweat. Androgynous people are just always hot, I am yet to meet a not hot androgynous person. But that may just be gender envy who knows.

PERSONALITY wise, i find it really attractive when the person is incredibly book-smart. Like intelligent and nerdy. All my previous crushes have been on massive nerds who would go off about their interests. I love it. Also its just kinda how when they just, /know/, so many things. I cant explain it, but it makes me blush and gives me butterflies. Also please hold my hand, and make eyecontact with me. Because those two things will make me fall in love with you. gnfgn I wrote so much omg

9. Do you want children?

NO

10. Have you gotten in trouble with the law?

Uh...I mean I've never gotten CAUGHT. So no. I have not.

11. What colour socks are you wearing?

I'm actually wearing obnoxiously yellow Hufflepuff socks a friend got me a couple years back

12. Bath or shower?

It depends. If I need to give a concert, shower. But if I need to wallow in self pity, bath.

13. Favourite kinds of music?

Rap but specifically London rap, Kpop, songs you would run through a flower field to, songs you would throw it back to, songs that make me feel hot, I also really like classical music BBC's Classic FM is one of my most listened to stations.

14. How many pillows do you sleep with?

I currently have nine on my bed, three big plushes, and several smaller plushies. I need a body pillow.

15. What position do you sleep in?

I am the big spoon to my massive RJ plushie. So on my side like I'm holding someone. Except I'm not its an RJ plushie ;')

16. What don't you like while sleeping?

Light and silence

17. What do you usually eat for breakfast?

I usually don't eat breakfast, but if I do then some spicy rice thing.

18. Have you ever tried archery?

no

19. What are your favourite fruits?

Kiwifruit and mandarins. Frozen blueberries. ALL MANGO. Dried strawberries.

20. Favourite swear word?

Idk when I'm put on the spot I usually swear like "Oh bloody hell" or "shitting hell" or "twat", but in conversation 'fucking' is a pretty good adjective.

21. Do you have any scars?

Too many. Some couldn't have been prevented, but some ought to have been.

22. Are you a good liar?

A frighteningly good liar.

23. What is your personality type?

ISTP-A

24. What is your favourite type of girl?

A girl who takes up her space.

25. Left or right handed?

Cross-dominance. So, I write with my right, but thats only because I was told to. Everything else I have no preference.

26. Favourite food?

Tteokbokki or gnocci.

27. Are you clean or messy?

Very clean.

28. Favourite foreign food?

Thai. 100%. That shit BUSSIN

29. How llong does it take you to get ready?

On a normal day when I have classes then about half a hour, but if I'm going out then an hour and a half.

30. Most used phrase?

"Darling" (I call people pet names, but 'darling' has become a 'thing'

"Mais je ne veux pas" (Usually to my mother)

"Can you please not"

"Oh how exciting" (sometimes sarcastic, sometimes genuine)

31. Are you a good singer?

I can sing both parts to Tightrope from The Greatest Showman really well. My vocal range is closest to Sia's I think, with the super deep and very high. SO yes.

32. Do I sing to myself?

All the time

33. Biggest fear?

That I'll regret it

34. Do you like long or short hair?

I currently have a what I like to call 'Kpop Mullet'. So short.

35. Are you into gossip?

Yes and no, I always know everything, but I never pass it on. I just know and keep my mouth shut.

36. Introvert or extrovert?

Introvert

37. Favourote school subject?

Science, French, Chinese, Fashion

38. What makes you nervous?

Noise

39. Who was your first real crush?

This guy when I was 12. We were in the same class, and we liked eachother, We 'got together' on a school trip to China, and held hands on the Huangpu River cruise in Shanghai, and we actually went out for eight months. It dosnt seem very long now, but it felt like a passionate whirlwind of romance to my tiny 12-year-old-self. We went on movie and shopping dates. We did good morning and goodnight texts. We said 'I love you' and really ment it. He was my comfort person and I still feel bittersweet thinking about him. I'd like to have that support now.

40. How many piercings do you have?

Two, my lobes. I only have so little because I have no time for healing because I swim so much. I usually wear clip-ons or cuffs. I want to get my tongue done.

41. How fast can you run?

I don't run

42. What makes you angry?

The first thing that comes to mind is the patriarchy and all the horror it encourages, and my second thought is when you can hear electricity.

43. Do you like your own name?

My parents sat me down and told me it would be fine of I change it. Unprompted. Make what you want of that.

44. What are your weaknesses? I'm almost always over or under stimulated.

45. What are your strengths?

I am suuuper confident with who I am and how I act, and that makes day-to-day life really easy. It may sometimes be faked, but we're all here to put on a show.

46. What colour is your beadspread?

Light blue with flowers.

47. What colour is your room?

We have white walls, but I have cob=vered them in my art and pictures. Like its a massive collage, my ceiling too.

Thank you Dayzee this was so much fun! I hope you learnt about me ;)

[thesecretbits]

Someone asked me how I got into Stray Kids. I'm going to answer that, and I'm putting it under a read more because it got longer than I thought it would.

My SKZ story begins with a Spotify playlist.

I'm a fan of Got7. As such, I always have a couple of kpop Daily Mixes on Spotify, one that's Got7 focused and one that's Jackson Wang focused (because Jackson is my Got7 bias). I listen to kpop at work for background noise because it's the safest music to listen to in an office setting because I don't have to monitor for the profanity that my other playlists have. As Daily Mixes change daily, different artists are sprinkled throughout and it's a good way to listen to many groups or solo artists even though I'm not really looking to stan multiple groups. Got7 was the only group I could say I was a serious fan of and I'd listen to subunits and solo stuff because they included the people in my group.

I was listening to my daily mix one day at work and this song came on. I was kinda busy at the time so I wasn't paying that much attention, but it stood out to me enough to make a point of finding out who sang it when I had time. When I went home that evening, I was listening to that same mix while I was cleaning my room and that song came up again and there was this voice. I needed to know who that was.

The song was Easy by Stray Kids.

So, I stopped cleaning and went to Youtube to watch the music video. Like most people, I could not believe that voice was coming out of that boy. But that was the end of it. Remember, I was not looking for groups to stan.

Fast forward a week later and my nephew is spending the night at my house. We're listening to a different Daily mix because my nephew is a kpop fan. Easy comes back on and my nephew really likes it. So, we watch the video and then he wants to watch more. The song that auto plays after Easy was God's Menu.

My nephew LOVES it from the very first note. He's dancing around, du du du-ing all over the place and then Felix does his part and that's the moment I fell into a Stray Kids hole I have yet to crawl out from.

Anyone who knows me knows I love me a deep voice.

Over the next few of weeks, I watch every bit of Stray Kids content I can find. I watched every SKZ guide because I wanted to learn about the members, every music video, you name it, I watched it. But it was those darn Aussie's that truly roped me in and did not let go.

Now I'm invested and I get up every Sunday morning so I can watch Chan be adorable for an hour and a half on Vlive. I watched Kingdom for this group. Anyone who knows me knows I hate talent competition shows. I'm a full grown fucking adult, I do not have time to stan a kpop group, but I adore the hell out of each and every one of those boys and here I am.

Their comeback in August is my first comeback as a Stay and I am way more excited about it than I should be.

So, that's my Stray Kids story. I'm glad I found them. I'm extremely proud of them. I want them to have all the good things and I want them to continue to be able to make the music they want to make how they want to make it. And I want them to be happy. Because I love them very much.

[k-p-p-d]

Ok, real talk... how do you lovey ladies feel about Jackson's new song, Papillon? Please enlighten me (if you would) because I have mixed feelings.

Okay so a funny note, I saw some people on Twitter I think freaking out wondering why the hell he was saying he felt like a dog and I just chuckled cuz they didn’t realize he was saying he felt like a butterfly (which the dog breed is named after) so they completely missed the point of the song.

But to the song itself:  I really think it’s a solid a move for Jackson establishing himself as a solo artist and really showing the world that this is his music and his style. The production is fantastic, as expected, and the video just screams Jackson Wang, which is also expected.  What I didn’t expect but was really happy about was that he rapped the whole song in English!  Considering he’s been making such huge waves for himself in China, I thought this would be his Chinese solo debut, but it’s actually his worldwide debut so that’s really exciting. I did enjoy it simply because I’ve been wanting to see this side of him for what feels like forever.  However, it’s not gonna be a song that I bump on repeat cuz it just isn’t quite there for me personally.  I did download it, though, to support him and to put on my workout playlist.

I guess, overall, it’s a solid 8.5/10 for me.  The beat is lit. The lyrics are solid. The flow is in pocket. The overall song though is just kinda like been-there-done-that-before. I think it’ll likely grow on me honestly but we shall see.

How’d you feel about it?

–Lily

[cece469]

New Here 2 RE-UPLOADED

Pairing: Jackson Wang x Mark Tuan x reader

Warnings: strong language (also failing at Korean words since I’m still learning and need to find them online. Please don’t hate me :( I’m trying here)

Genre: fluff

As you’re getting ready for the day you’re humming a song that’s been stuck in your head by your favorite KPOP group GOT7 “I’m yours, you’re mine..” you sing and continue to hum the song. After you finally get your outfit ready, which is just a pair of blue ripped skinny jeans, a green flannel shirt opened with a black tank top underneath, and your black converse high tops. You hop in the shower and start to sing more “never ever! Never gonna let you go!..” you continue singing as you wash your hair. You hear your phone go off and luckily it’s right next to your towel. You dry off your hand to see a message from Jackson

Jackson: My friends are hella excited to meet you lol.

You: that’s great I’m in the shower! Let me shower in peace!

Jackson: well jeez how was I supposed to know?!

Jackson: wait if you’re in the shower how the hell are you texting me?

You: with great difficulty, now let me shower!

Jackson: alright alright! Hope you get ready fast because we’re already almost ready here.

You check the time.

You: dude you said at 10:30 AM that I have an hour. And it’s already 11:00 AM let me get ready you ass!

Jackson: alright go get ready and let me know when you’re almost ready so we can leave.

You: yeah yeah

You put your phone down and continue to shower and now a new song is stuck in your head and you begin to hum it. After you wash your hair and shave and everything you finish and get out of the shower. The steam filled bathroom gets too stuffy so you open the door a little. You check the time and it’s 11:15 AM shortest shower ever! You laugh and start to dry off. The steam begins to go away and you continue to dry off. You start to get dressed but almost forgot that your hair was still kinda damp so you blow dry it and straighten it “i need to get this trimmed soon haha” you say to yourself. You push your hair behind your back and start to get dressed. You realized you was still damp after you put your bra and panties on so you just had to put on your jeans and top. After you finished getting dressed you put on some makeup. Nothing major since it’s not anything fancy. You put in some eyeliner and added a small wing, a dark brown eyeshadow that looked nice with your skin and some mascara. You didn’t put any lipstick or lipgloss on because you didn’t need it. You put on some chapstick though since your lips were dry. After you finished in the bathroom you went out to throw on your socks and sneakers. You were humming a new song. “Everyday.. every night.. feel like a fool.. you gotta know…” you continued quietly. After your shoes were on you texted Jackson.

You: alright I’m ready.

Jackson: awesome we’ll be over soon. I’ll let you know when we’re outside.

You: Mkay.

You smiled and relaxed. You watched some TV as you waited for their arrival.

(JACKSON POV)

You looked around making sure you had everything. “Mask, check. Phone, check. Keys, check.” You nodded to yourself. “Alright are you guys ready?!” You yelled out to everyone in the house. “Yea” they all said in unison. “Alright let’s go.” You said leading them all out of the house. Everyone had their masks on to hide who they were. They had hats and masks so nobody could tell who they actually were. “Alright guys she can’t speak Korean that well but I wanna mess with her, so act like you only speak Korean. No English.” You said smiling. They all nodded. You showed a thumbs up and continued to walk through Seoul to her apartment. “Alright here we are. Hang on I’ll text her and tell her we’re here.” You said whipping out your phone.

(Y/N POV)

You get a message from Jackson “they must be outside.” You say to yourself smiling. You turn off the TV and grab your keys. Once you’re out the door you lock it and quickly go down the hall to the steps. When you’re about to go outside Jackson jumps out and scares you. “Jesus you scared me!” You yelled holding your hand to your heart and playfully hitting him. “I know. That was kind of the point Haha.” He says with a smile that makes your heart skip a beat. You clear your throat and look away. Pointing at the group outside “are those your friends?” You ask. He nods “but there’s one issue. They only speak Korean..” Jackson says sheepishly. Your eyes widen. “Jackson! You know I can’t speak it that well!” You say trying to sound stern but it comes out sounding like a whine. “Just come on.” He says pulling you outside. They’re all wearing masks and hats even though it’s barely sunny out. You ignore it and say hello as best you can “안녕하세요 (hello) 죄송하지만 저는 한국어를 잘 하지 못해요. (I’m sorry my Korean is bad) 하지만 지금 한국어를 공부중이에요. (I am still learning.)“ you say embarrassed since you probably sound like an idiot. They all smile at you. “You were right Jackson for not knowing much korean she can pronounce things quite well. It sounds very fluent.” One of them say. “Wait Jackson you said they only speak Korean.” You say looking at him confused. “I was just kidding!” He says laughing. You all laugh. Once everyone stops laughing all eyes are on you. “Well y/n I’ll introduce everyone to you.” He begins. “This is Mark.” He says pointing one of them. He waves “hi nice to meet you. I come from the US as well.” He said smiling at you. You smile back “nice to meet you as well.” Jackson continues pointing to another one of his friends, he looks much more serious then the rest. “That’s Jaebum but we call him JB.” Jackson says. He waves and you wave back. He continues “this is Jinyoung.” He says pointing to the other boy. He has bigger ears but he’s adorable. You smile at him. Jackson continues on “this is Youngjae, this is BamBam of course it’s just a nickname because his full name is annoying to say he is also from Thailand, and last the baby of us all is Yugyeom.” After he finishes introducing them it clicks. You gasp and cover your mouth in shock “you’re GOT7.” You say quietly. They all look at each other in panic. Jackson nods. “Yep, I trust you enough to keep this to yourself.” He says looking at you. You smile “of course I will. Second day in Korea and I already have a good group of friends.” You say to them all. They all smile. “Well we’re glad we made a new one as well.” Mark says smiling brightly at you.

A/N: so I sorta like this series I think it’s kinda cute. Lol let me know what you think. Again excuse my failure of Korean typing. But enjoy

[marculees]

Soft Bias Tag <3

Tagged by the lovely @pikachulein, thank you! ^-^

Prepare for soft cringe. So because I’m selfish and lowkey narcissistic hahaha, I kinda have two so this is going to be a 2-in-1 yay. I haven’t even started yet and I’m already laughing?? Anyway lets go~

1. Who is my Bias?

💛 Jackson Wang

💜 Mark Lee

2. What made you notice him?

💛 His laugh, sense of humor and energy! It was contagious and I couldn’t help just OwO at him in every video lololol

💜 Lmao we have the exact same birthday so I was like omg yes finally someone I can relate to. So I looked up his profile and noticed we were basically the same person and was shook O.o

3. What’s your favorite thing about him?

💛 His heart of gold (aha get the emoji reference yeeeah i did that).He’s honestly such a kind and generous person and sjkglsgfdkjf he makes me cry. Like when I see him helping others or taking care of his members or his family especially, my heart skips a beat. He’s my ideal type tbh, as cringey as that sounds. Here’s an excerpt from a letter to my bias thing I have in my drafts cx

“Ideal types may be just a charade to some, but ultimately you are everything I want in a partner. Your kindness and generosity is one of my favourite things about you and is hugely underappreciated by others. How you always go out of your way to help others, be it strangers or loved ones, is so inspiring. You truly have a heart of gold and I feel like it isn’t said enough. Yes, you are fucking gorgeous and a huge idiot but its the kind soul underneath that I love most.”

💜 That he makes me feel more confident and loving towards myself <3

“I’ve always been the black sheep, odd one out, and I still struggle with finding others I can relate to. When I was in school I was friendly with everyone but with my friends I wasn’t really considered part of the group. I didn’t fit.  I was an afterthought, an outsider. I’m in college now and while I do feel a sense of belonging with my new friends, with you I feel not just that but a sense of understanding, a sense of empathy NCT 2018. Since the very first day, I settled on biasing you for these probably selfish reasons alone. I was a kid back then, we both were. And now that we are barely considered adults, I am still following you. But my initial fascination has become much deeper than just that. The more I’ve fallen in love with you, the more I’ve begun to love myself also. You show and teach me things I’ve discredited or put down about about myself. The more interest I showed in you and your group, the more similar I realised we are. From our attitude, ethic, gestures, sense of humor and way of speaking, it became apparent to me that I had finally found someone. Someone who makes me feel like it’s okay to be who I am, because I am not alone. What I perceived as flaws in myself, I saw as endearing in you.”

*pukes from cringe at myself* I am never going to post the full thing

4. Who would initiate skinship more?

💛 HIM WITHOUT A DOUBT. He’s a touchy baby. Tbh it would probably piss me off slightly, like I’m just being honest ahaha. I don’t mind people touching my thigh or my arm for a second but he’s the type to just touch and then stay there lol

💜 Him too, I think. I’ve noticed he’s become a bit more touchy with the members recently! I’m not very touchy but if someone is more chill about it and doesn’t feel like its necessary or has to be like all the fucking time, then I’m more inclined to actually engage in it surprise surprise.

5. Who would hog the blankets more?

💛 I would say him but then I remember him saying he gets really hot at night (it was in one of those GOT2Days with JB lol). I get hot too so he can hog them if he wants cx

💜 He’s pretty chill, like so long as he has his pillow to hug then I don’t think he would mind much. I would insist on covering him up still though. I’m not a hogger at all, in fact usually I end up with literally half/no blanket in the morning because I’ve kicked it off at some point

6. Who would be more clingy?

💛 HIM. I honestly don’t think I need to explain XD

💜 Oooh tough question. I feel like it could be him? I would be more clingy on the inside, if that makes sense?

7. Who would say I love you first?

💛 I think it would be me but just as like a casual thing like, “Ahh you’re lucky I love you”. But he would take it serious and be like “...I love you too”. And then I’d get all giggly and embarrassed because that’s all I ever do T-T

💜 Maybe me? Idk like it would a kind of ‘in the moment’ thing? I’d be thinking it but I wouldn’t say it until I realised I actually had. I’ve done this before ;-;

8. Who would be more easily flustered?

💛 Me!!!! I bet that would be his favourite thing to do too. He’s such a little shit like he’d be all “Aww is someone all blushy?” and then make me even worse and kjdsgfldfmdsfg I would lowkey enjoy it tbh XD

💜 I think him actually! I wouldn’t be over-the-top romantic or cheesy so if I ever did something, it would catch him by surprise and make him uwu haha. I’m not the best at speaking my thoughts but I would write lots of poems and songs for him and I think that would make him get all flustered since he likes writing too c:

9. What cuddling position would you two have?

💛 Aww I honestly love backhugs so anything where I could just wrap my arms around him and lie against his back. The big spoon! But I feel like he would give the best hugs so like sitting in his lap with his arms around me and djkfhdjfhj fuck this shit I’m out T-T

💜 We’re both quite childish and awkward when it comes to cuddling so I feel like it would be just playwrestling and then forgetting that we’re supposed to wrestle so we just lie in a big tangle on top of each other ;-;

10. Which colors remind you of them and why?

💛 Yellow because his blonde hair is beautiful, plus he’s so bright and cheerful like the colour itself  ^-^

💜 Pink! He looks adorable in pink plus he’s mentioned the colour a few times on broadcasts and stuff so I feel like he has a fondness for it~

11. Which season would you like to spend with them?

💛 Summer because he’s probably be sleeveless all the time or even shirtless... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I have no shame ahahaha

💜 Winter because I think if it was snowing, it would remind him of his home and then it would be cute af and we’d have a snowball fight and hot chocolate after <3

12. Who would bake the cookies and who would steal the batter?

💛 Tbh we’d bake and steal it together XD

💜 I think he would try so hard not to fuck the baking up but I’d tempt him into stealing the batter with me cx

13. Which one of you would make bad puns and how would the other react?

💛 Ohhh definitely me. And he’d either scream with laughter or just get pissed off oops. I’d just laugh even more though lmao

💜 We share the same sense of humor so it would be kinda mutual! I’d make a shitty pun and he makes an even worse one on top of that and then we end up getting into a spiral of awful puns and rhymes and before you know it we’ve written possibly the worst rap of all time

14. Who would want to adopt 50 dogs and cats?

💛 Me. I don’t want kids but I’m g with furbabies. 50 is a bit much though XD

💜 ^^^

15. Which one of you would nearly burn down the kitchen trying to microwave a pop tart and who would come to the rescue?

💛 I’d be the dumbass burning down the kitchen, no questions asked. He’d be having a heart attack and be screaming, like I can actually hear his scream right now just picturing it XD

💜 Oh dear, again it would probably be mutual... >.<

16. Who likes to lean over trail railings and who pulls them back?

💛 I’m really protective so I’d help steady him and make sure he doesn’t fall because we know how excited he gets XD

💜 ^^^ But I have seen him holding the members and looking out for their safety in general, so I think it would be him in this case actually~

17. What would watching a horror film with them be like?

💛 “This isn’t even scary. Like look, nothing is happening. Stop hiding behind the cushion, Niamh.” “THE MOTHERFUCKER IS RIGHT ON THE SCREEN, YOU LIAR. I HATE YOU.”

💜 “If you get scared, you can hold onto me” .“You mean, cuddle you because you’re scared, right?”. “Ah...yes, Niamh. Thanks.”

18. Who would be the cheesy flirt and who would be the smooth flirt?

💛 He’d be sooooo cheesy, like to the point where its not even flirting but just straight up cringey. I don’t flirt often but when I do, its like wow I see what you did there. But I’d get embarrassed around him so it would be less smooth and more stuttery unless I got a sudden burst of confidence. He would have no shame flirting though, like he legit would be the type to say “Omg damn girl, that ass” and I’d slap him XD

💜 Eww he’d be cheesy like he’d be walking around and see something and try make it a rap like in the LA vlog lmao. Something really dumb like “You’re so pretty, those flowers don’t compare because you have a cute face and nice hair” and I’d just be like “uhhh....thanks?” and burst out laughing and blushing out of secondhand embarrassment XD

19. Who is more competitive?

💛 We’re both so competitive but I think with his history in sporting competitions (whereas I was too shy to do them T-T), it would give him just a bit more. I’d always encourage him though, like I’d love seeing him try his best and would always ask if there was anything I could do to help. But if it came to games, I don’t take the “I let you win” excuse cx

💜 Me? I take my passions very seriously and throw myself into what I do, like I get VERY into my work. I was v competitive in debating and any time I hear the word challenge, its like yasss bring it on bish. Mark is competitive too but I think he’d prefer taking a support role. He’s so encouraging of his members and I honestly need a little cheerleader like him in my life ;-;

20. Who would be given constant reminders? (Don’t forget your keys, things like that)

💛 As much of a nagger I can be, I feel like he is the type to do this even at random moments. Like we’d be chilling together and then he’ll just say out of nowhere, “Did you eat lunch btw? I’m going to make you lunch”. He wouldn’t listen to any bullshit. He’d take care of me whether I liked it or not haha

💜 Hhmm kinda mutual here but for different things, if that makes sense? Like he’d be telling me to “take your meds and vitamins, bring a jacket, text when you get there”, etc. I’d be like “take a break for a few minutes, I’ll be there soon with some food”, etc, I need reminders for taking care of myself but I give reminders for others to take care of themselves lol

21. Who sends memes and who sends cute ‘i miss you’ texts at 3am?

💛 He’s the sappy bitch with “I miss you” texts haha and being the idiot I am, I would send him memes of himself in response XD

💜 Honestly, unless he was maybe drunk I think it would be me. Like it would very out of the blue and probably make him panic a bit oops. He’d write a long ass ride message in response though because he’d be so worried ^^’

This was very soft and cringey ahaha but I’m going to tag @jaexmins @cosmicrailwaybisexual @happysmilebtr @kikitsaaa @nctdoingthings @castielsinwhite @thefroghyungwon @seulgii-princess and if anyone else wants to do it then just say I tagged you XD