I’m a huge proponent for anyone should have access to whatever tools they need to do whatever they want to their body etc but ngl it makes me sad seeing the number of AFAB transes who speak of taking testosterone as this almost like, unfortunate thing you gotta endure to get a set list of Desired Changes, or this sorta like, thing you gotta compromise on, with this whole list of negative effects that you gotta risk if you want the positives or whatever, and just constant posts that are functionally like “how long do I have to be on T until I can stop?” or “I want XYZ changes from T but I don’t want ABC changes,” and like it just frustrates me because to be frank I love testosterone. I love everything about being on it and I consider it a miracle that modern medicine has made it possible to access this hormone exogenously if we can’t produce enough of it ourselves. I feel like fundamentally my lack of proper T levels had a negative impact on me until it was corrected and I don’t feel like I was truly myself until I began HRT. Literally the only negative thing about it at all is the frustration that I’m dependent on an outside source for the rest of my life rather than able to just make it myself but there’s no doubt in my mind that I want to be on it for the rest of my life. While maybe a bit pedantic I don’t view T as having side effects, I don’t even necessarily view it as a medication in the traditional sense, it’s just an artificial way for me to correct my body to the state it already should’ve been in. I was overcome by relief after taking my very first dose when I was seeing 0 changes and even as the initial excitement has naturally died down over the years that relief is something I never take for granted. If I could keep every change T has given me and stop taking it I still wouldn’t because beneath all the desire for the changes there is an innate desire to just be on testosterone. I just idk dude I wish that HRT at least within the FTM / transmasc community was viewed with more reverence and the perspectives of those who view it as genuinely a life saving and necessary resource were given a little more voice. I think the entire idea of hormonal dysphoria and the need to alleviate it by correcting one’s hormone production separate from the laundry list of the possible more visible changes and side effects and what’s desired or not or what’s permanent or not etc etc of HRT is seen as weirdly archaic in lots of mainstream FTM spaces and it’s a bit frustrating and isolating.
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I want top surgery so fucking bad
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i have artblock
the 1st drawings r recent(when i get artblock i just try 2 study anatomy idk)
transcript;
bernard; ok, so, listeners ask; jay, how is ur hair not damnaged? what deal did u have 2 make?
bernard; yeah whats ur secret?
jay; would u believe asian magic?
bernard(@ the same time); i mean how can we b sure-
jay; ber-
bernard; wait-
jay; ber!
bernard; wait! yk what i meant!
(thers a jump here bc i was 2 lazy 2 draw)
jay; im coming out again; ive been exposed. my hair is actually from my deal w/batman whos actually the devil
bernard; shup up shut up shut up omg
jay; 50 video special ill b cursing ber. get ready!
baernard; i h8 q n as
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spoiler for season 4
Can we like not have wukong written out of the show every season, please?
Like I get the first season. Everything is starting out you need to get the characters and their roles clear to the audience. you need to establish the norm so it's more meaningful when it's taken away later in seasons 3 and 4. you need to know what the characters are possibly missing. From a writing standpoint it makes sense
the second season I can also get. like there is a really good reason he's out of the show and only popping up here and there. He is in heaven and every day in heaven is a year in the mortal plain. in the show it makes sense.
but in season 3 it's just ridiculous. they are in a van together traveling the whole season I mean come on. he is only really a part of two episodes and in one of them, he can't remember anything.
by season 4 which would be the perfect time to have him hanging around and having to make up for his mistakes, he is taken out in the first episode. I know we see past him in a later episode which is great but I don't know it still leaves a bad taste in my mouth
like even in the gosh darn speshle he is written out. In the New Year's speshle he is captured by spider queen and lbd and in the season 3 speshles he is possed. this is because he's OP and if he's in the fight he'll win before Mk and crew do anything but still it's getting ridiculous.
there are so many ways you could have him there and not get in the way of Mk. like, have Pigsy or someone ask why he never helps and have him say something like "I'm his mentor if I always helped he'd never be able to handle it himself. I'm here if he needs advice or if it gets too much for but other then I just note down what needs to be done in training.". you can have him not messing anything up writing wise and we get to see more of him being MK's mentor.
I don't know hopefully their building up for something like they did with lbd but right now it feels like a waste.
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oh boy, traditional art
Yup, back to the basics
Starting off with some meh lineart because filters made it look descent
I prolly didn’t tell y’all but I got a haircut! And I look like that now, except uglier irl
Angy.
and now an art blurt that needs no commentary!
(yes I used filter, also I’m okay just bleghhruhguehehrghrgrhrg) <- myoots will understand
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