#Whipped - Chapter One
TaoTao: Does anyone wanna help me with this essay i’m stuck on?
Read by 11 people
TaoTao: Y’all can go suck a dick
Jongdae’s hoe: gladly
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Chanyeol is obvious, Kyungsoo is oblivious and no one says no to Yixing.
Chanyeol x Kyungsoo | Jongdae x Baekhyun | Sehun x Jongin | Minseok x Luhan | Yixing x Tao | Kris x Junmyeon - chatroom style fic - 1.3k words
Disclaimer: this fic was started prior to Yifan’s arrest and I do not support him in any way. Any further chapters including him merely write him as a character for continuity
The members chat names are:
TaoTao: Tao
Dog lord: Kai/Jongin
No.1 Vivi supporter: Sehun
Lu: Luhan
Kyungsoo: D.O/Kyungsoo
Kris: Kris/Yifan
Myeonie: Suho/Junmyeon
XingXing: Lay/Yixing
Jongdae's hoe: Baekhyun
Baekhyun's hoe: Chen/Jongdae
Yeol: Chanyeol
Hot dad: Xiumin/Minseok
Chatroom: Fuck This
TaoTao: Do you guys ever think about how many toes there are in the world?
Kyungsoo: I hate this chat and everyone in it.
Lu: ^
Hot dad: ^^
Yeol: but not me right soo?
Kyungsoo: Especially you.
Jongdae’s hoe: and that kids is the sound of all of Chanyeol’s hope dying
Yeol: soos just joking!! i know that
Kyungsoo: Do you guys ever think about how much quieter life would be without Chanyeol around?
Yeol: but i love you soooooo
Kyungsoo: That’s nice.
No.1 Vivi supporter: Why did no one tell me savage Kyungsoo hyung was out?? You hoes would really let me miss that??
Myeonie: Sehun! Language!
No.1 Vivi supporter: But hyung you know you’re my favourite hoe?
Myeonie: Awhh Sehun
Baekhyun’s hoe: and here comes Jongin in 3
Jongdae’s hoe: 2
Baekhyun’s hoe: 1
Dog lord: Sehunnie I thought I was your favourite hoe?
Hot dad: I can’t believe that works every time
No.1 Vivi supporter: I -
No.1 Vivi supporter: Shit u right, sorry not sorry Junmyeon hyung
Dog Lord: ^-^
Yeol: #whipped
Kris: you can hardly talk Chanyeol
Kris: and babe you’re my favourite hoe
Myeonie: I would hope so if you want to get any tonight
TaoTao: I would like to delete that image from my brain
Lu: But then your brain would be empty
TaoTao: @Hot dad Your boyfriend is being mean
Hot dad: Last I checked, there’s nothing mean about telling the truth
TaoTao: Xiiiinnnnggg
XingXing: Come on guys, leave poor TaoTao alone
TaoTao: Luv u XingXing
No.1 Vivi supporter: Suck up
XingXing: What was that Sehun?
No.1 Vivi supporter: Nothing Yixing hyung!! I was just saying how hot you looked today
XingXing: Thank you Sehunnie ^-^
Dog lord: “Sehunnie” ??????
Lu: Uh oh
Dog lord: “S e h u n n i e” ?????
Myeonie: Okay kids, don’t you think it’s about time you get on with uni work?
Kris: you know they’re not actually our kids, right?
Myeonie: W u Y i f a n
Kris: okay kids, listen to your mother
Yeol: #whipped
Kyungsoo: Shut up Chanyeol.
Yeol: anything for u soo
Jongdae’s hoe: i’m gonna puke
Baekhyun’s hoe: don’t worry babe, i’ll hold your hair
No.1 Vivi supporter: Do you think chanyeol realises how obvious he is?
Kyungsoo: Obvious about what?
Dog lord: .....
Jongdae’s hoe: .......
Baekhyun’s hoe: .........
No.1 Vivi supporter: I give up
TaoTao: Does anyone wanna help me with this essay i’m stuck on?
Read by 11 people
TaoTao: Y’all can go suck a dick
Jongdae’s hoe: gladly
Chatroom: Fuck This
Yeol: @Kyungsoo can u come to the studio to record vocals?
Kyungsoo: Why?
Yeol: youd sound so good on the song we are writing
Kyungsoo: You think I have the time for that?
XingXing: Come on Kyungsoo, your voice is perfect for this song!!
Kyungsoo: Alright then, i’ll be there in 10 minutes hyung.
XingXing: Yay!!
No.1 Vivi supporter: @Yeol Ouch you okay hyung?
Yeol: never been better hahahaha
Yeol: hahaha
Yeol: ha
Yeol: i have to get back to the studio bye guys
Lu: Great, you broke Chanyeol
Chatroom: The Hoes™
Yeol: hahahaha dont you love being rejected by ur crush
Baekhyun’s hoe: oh boy, here we go
Jongdae’s hoe: dude he’s still coming to the studio
Yeol: BUT HE NEVER DOES THINGS WHEN I ASK!!!!!
Baekhyun’s hoe: okay but no one says no to Yixing hyung
Jongdae’s hoe: yeh it’s the rules
Yeol: maybe ur right i mean he wouldve said no too if jongdae was the one asking
Baekhyun’s hoe: I am offended
Jongdae’s hoe: woah babe, a capital “I”? calm down
Baekhyun’s hoe: i’m chill i’m chill
Yeol: asdfghjkfhfsfnlkjgoerhgerlrgndkfsm
Jongdae’s hoe: you okay there hoe no.3?
Yeol: whydoeshehavesuchaperfectsingingvoiceplsENDME
Baekhyun’s hoe: you need me to come to the studio for moral support?
Yeol: p l e a s e
Baekhyun’s hoe: i’ll be there in 5 mins
Yeol: jongdae ur my best friend ily
Jongdae’s hoe: uhm bitch i’m right here
Yeol: srry dae ur my best friend after baek
Jongdae’s hoe: too late bitch go choke on Kyungsoo’s dick
Yeol: dtfyguhijonfwpmdksuwuohgfiejhfuck
Baekhyun’s hoe: do i need to call an ambulance?
Yeol: i choked on my drink bc of baeks text and soo started patting my back HE TOUCHED ME GUYS
Jongdae’s hoe: why am i friends with you
Baekhyun’s hoe: i’m at the studio, Chanyeol looks like he’s dying and Yixing hyung is v concerned
Jongdae’s hoe: don’t care let the hoe suffer
Baekhyun’s hoe: this is why i’m the nice friend Baek
Jongdae’s hoe: it’s more fun being a bitch Dae
Yeol: j o n g d a e
Baekhyun’s hoe: gotta go, the hoe is struggling
Jongdae’s hoe: Jongdae: i’m the nice friend
Jongdae’s hoe: Jongdae 2 secs later: calls Chanyeol “the hoe”
Chatroom: Fuck This
Hot dad: Why do Monday’s drag so much? Work seemed to last forever today
XingXing: Tell me about it, Yeol and I spent hours in the studio today
XingXing: It’s 8pm and I only just got home
No.1 Vivi supporter: Yeah Chanyeol hyung only got home 10 minutes ago and went straight to his room
Lu: Speaking of, Chanyeol hasn’t said anything here since Kyungsoo rejected him
Kyungsoo: I didn’t reject him, I still went to the studio.
Lu: Because Yixing asked
Kyungsoo: You don’t say no to Yixing hyung.
Jongdae’s hoe: it’s the rules
Baekhyun’s hoe: where did these rules come from?
Hot dad: Junmyeon probably
Lu: Junmyeon
Kris: Myeonie
TaoTao: Probably our literal mum Junmyeon hyung
Myeonie: YES OKAY WE GET IT
Kyungsoo: Luhan hyung is right though, Chanyeol’s never this quiet.
Jongdae’s hoe: .......
Baekhyun’s hoe: ...........
Yeol: @No.1 Vivi supporter pls come to my room
Kris: is anyone surprised anymore that Chanyeol shows up as soon as Kyungsoo mentions him?
Yeol: oh hey soo didnt notice you there
TaoTao: I call bullshit
Kyungsoo: What do you mean Tao?
TaoTao: I.....
TaoTao: @Yeol What do you need Sehun for?
No.1 Vivi supporter: Yeah we literally live in the same house, come to my room hyung
Dog lord: is that a good idea?
Yeol: what if i cant leave my room and you clearly have headphones in so i have to message you here
No.1 Vivi supporter: .... You got stuck under your bed again didn’t you?
Yeol: maybe...
Myeonie: Again? This has happened before?
No.1 Vivi supporter: Sigh i’m coming now hyung
Baekhyun’s hoe: Sehun is done on a whole new level
Yeol: ur the best dongsaeng!!!
Kyungsoo: Idiot.
Yeol: soooooo dont be mean
Yeol: comfort me in these hard times
Kyungsoo: Oh, would you look at the time, I have to go.
TaoTao: Every day I lose more and more faith in Chansoo being real
Kris: ^
Lu: ^^
Dog lord: ^^^
Jongdae’s hoe: sorry Chanyeol but ^^^^
Chatroom: Hot dad + Kyungsoo
Kyungsoo: HE GOT STUCK UNDER THE BED.
Kyungsoo: AGAIN.
Kyungsoo: WHAT A DORK.
Kyungsoo: I WANT TO PROTECT HIM.
Hot dad: Y’know, instead of just yelling to me every time he does something you apparently find cute, you could just be nice and stop pretending you can’t stand him?
Kyungsoo: Sounds like hard work.
Hot dad: Lord knows I need at least a bottle of wine to deal with this...
Hot dad: Okay but y’know maybe he’d realise your feelings then?
Kyungsoo: That’s exactly why I act the way I do hyung
Hot dad: But Kyungsoo if he knows your feeling then you could maybe idk, act like normal people and date?
Kyungsoo: But Chanyeol doesn’t have feelings for me?
Hot dad: Breathe Minseok breathe
Kyungsoo: ?
Hot dad: Sigh whatever go back to telling me about your dork
Kyungsoo: Well considering you asked.
Kyungsoo: HE’S SO CUTE. HE’S SO TALL BUT HE ACTS SO SMOL THAT HE PROBABLY FORGETS HOW TALL HE IS SOMETIMES.
Kyungsoo: HOW MANY TIMES HAS HE GOTTEN STUCK UNDER HIS BED? THAT’S ADORABLE, HE’S ADORABLE.
Chatroom: The Gays
Hot dad: Babe I need like a bottle of wine right now
Hot dad: Oh god he’s gushing about Chanyeol’s ears now
Hot dad: Make it two bottles
Lu: Babe it’s Monday night, you have work tomorrow
Hot dad: Did I fucking stutter?
Lu: I’m about to head home, i’ll pick some up on the way
Hot dad: I love you
Lu: I love you too baby
Hot dad: Buy me the good wine and i’ll suck your dick later
Lu: 2BOTTLESOFGOODWINECOMINGUP
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