#lashon

[shalom-iamcominghome]

[blastlight]

does Lashon Hara prohibit vagueposting

[orphee-aux-enfers]

So, I'm asking honestly and in good faith to better understand Orthodox attitudes toward queerness. Suppose you had a son, who is male according to halacha, and he wants to have an intimate relationship with another man (who is similarly male according to halacha). How would you feel about this? How would your wider community feel? Do you think other Orthodox Jews in your community would feel the same in that situation, or is there a spread?

Hi anon. Thanks for the kindness in asking politely, though that should be the bare minimum. Not sure why you're asking me of all people, though. I'm an intersex transsexuel who identifies literally as a "tranny fagdyke". I am married to another transexual who also IDs as a tranny. My wider community absolutely accepts us, but it is still community dependent. So. If my son was also queer, I expect he'd be similarly loved and supported and given free food and hospitality and invited to gatherings and such because we would not be in an unaccepting community. Personally, I've never been shunned at any stage of visible queerness or transness. Maybe I've been lucky. But 7 ish communities is an awful lot for me to feel it's a fluke.

I think the thing people need to understand is that while orthodox Jews at large may not have prior knowledge, or understand, or approve, many refuse to speak out or discriminate due to lashon hara. This means you have acceptance without understanding which is MORE THAN SUFFICIENT for me, especially because the secular world is incredibly hard for me to exist in even if I'm NOT visibly religious, which I very much am. I would much rather be supported by someone who doesn't understand me than outright treated with hatred by someone who uses the politically correct terms of transgender as a slur and calls me a k*** to my face for being a Jew (my experience in secular, queer liberal spaces).

So. Lashon hara. A thing that I think EVERYONE should learn!!!! Because every SINGLE orthodox Jew I know practices it, well, religiously. Including about our trans and queer members of the community. No one chastises as harshly as a bubbe hearing someone call someone names behind their back, to be honest.

Obviously I cannot speak for every community, or even my community's private opinions because I'm ONE PERSON. I've never lived in a New York or New Jersey community. I've mostly lived in Europe, where Orthodox Judaism is often more frequently just... Judaism. It's very unfair to paint all communities with the same brush, based on what seem to me to be minority experiences within an already tiny minority. I understand it's not everyone's experience, but honestly and truly, I know more queer orthodox Jews with good experiences than I know queer orthodox Jews with bad experiences.

[transmascpetewentz]

you can get away with saying a lot of shit if you present yourself as a neutral, third party, "rational thinker."

[torahtot]

it's awesome that sometimes all u have to do to seem like such a cool knowledgeable connected person in jewish spaces is be raised orthodox but it's also not awesome

[tani-b-art]

Black and Missing Foundation — linktree

BAMFI — website

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[hilacopter]

Re: the person who asked about learning hebrew as a gentile

im a diaspora jew and while i was learning hebrew at some point, still dont know it even close to fluently. But i think its fine to learn it, its just a language. As long as you’re learning it for positive reasons, i dont see an issue with it and i cant imagine anyone else would.

Yeah, I very much agree with you. I don't really know that much about the religious and cultural context of Hebrew (like I said before to me it's simply my first language) so I was worried my answer might not be appropriate and people who are more widely familiar with Jewish culture and history than me might disagree or take offense. Idk what I was so worried about, yea learning Hebrew is fine. If you're already willing to put in the effort to learn Hebrew, which a lot of people agree is one of the more difficult languages to learn, you're probably not doing it with bad intentions.

[atthebell-moved]

i really hate when people try to hardcore anthropologize religious beliefs like actually no you don't need to logic reason why a group of people does a spiritual practice

[torais-life]

"It's better to throw yourself into a fire than embarrass someone in public".

(about the story of Judah & Tamar)

-Rab. Abraham Cohen

[orca-worca-woo]

There's this guy at my shul who is in the process of converting to Judaism, and that's all well and good, and his situation is particularly interesting and unique.

However, he's hyper critical sometimes (in a sincere way) of things like our calendar, or like saying that Yiddish is worthless (and Ladino and other languages). It's just like really weird to deal with and he's not someone who really accepts reasonable answers to the issues he presents.

Idk not exactly like trying to sound rude or anything, I think I just needed to put those thoughts out into the void. He's entitled to those beliefs and expressions and all, and I know he's sincere about converting. It's just... hmmm....

[blastlight]

re: lashon hara & vaugeing, i think it should be okay as long as you aren’t tacky abt it

funnily enough, this is a pretty vague explanation. can you elaborate, please? :]

[challahbread]

hashem give me strength not to get into fights online even if they would be so so so so so funny

[a-j134]

🔴APRENDE HEBREO! Vocabulario para principiantes # 2 por la Morá Lety Pal...

[torahtot]

also i loooove being the butch of the house bc my dad's gone. like my brother technically is the man of the house bc he's home more but he's a wimpy 13 year old yeshiva bachur who hardly has the confidence to mumble kiddush. im the one setting up the fireplace and putting together furniture and solving tech issues and buying groceries. AND organizing the sefarim shelf by the way.

[spokanefavs]

Juneteenth Educational Resources from B'chol Lashon

[storytour-blog]

A Matter of Perspective

One day a rich man received a letter from his son who was studying in another city. Being occupied, he asked his secretary to read it to him. The secretary, who was in a bad mood, read in a disagreeable irritable way, “Father! Send me some money right away. I need a new pair of shoes and a coat.” When the father heard what his son had written, he cried out, “That insolent ingrate! How dare he…