#last life drawing class i got my tutor to get the mode to work with cloth props

[kidovna]

How howww do you render folds so well digitally?! Your art as me in a chokehold I swear I study it every time u post something new! The Doctor fan-art dress ahhhh!

!!! thank you, this is the biggest compliment 😭💗 I think the more i’ve been observing it i’ve just retained an understanding of how cloth looks like when folded. that being said, there are definitely time i mess it up spectacularly haha

[tinybean23]

Me and Yuu Every Step of the Way

In a world where everyone has some sexual attraction Azumane Asahi has always thought of himself as asexual, and those feelings only strengthening when he got together with his crush Nishinoya Yuu. However after a while Asahi starts feeling odd around Noya, and after a study night leaves him questioning if he truly is ace.

Originally posted on Ao3 I figured I could post this piece I wrote here as well! If youd rather read it there heres a link to it.

Without further ado I hope you enjoy this fanfic, and if you could share your thoughts it's be greatly appreciated!

Chapter 1: I Don't Know What to Do

I never thought these feelings were possible... Ashai sighed as he tried to focus on the words of his professor. He began to fidget as he recounted last night's events. Nishinoya had come over for help with his work as he didn’t feel like putting up with Ennoshita’s tutoring. Things had been going smoothly until Noya decided he was bored and would rather do something else than his work. He had crawled onto Ashai’s lap with a smirk silencing any attempts of protest with a peck on the lips. 

 

“Cmon Asahi, we've studied long enough right? Can’t we take a short break?” Noya whispered wrapping his hands around Asahi’s neck.

 

“Yuu...You came here to study...We need to-” if Asahi really had wanted to, he could easily push him away, and Noya in turn wouldn’t push further.

 

“Please Azumane?” He gave his best pleading eyes, planting another peck on his lips making Asahi’s head all fuzzy.

 

“What am I going to do with you?” Asahi sighed fondly, wrapping his arms around Noya’s waist.

 

“Make out with me obviously!” Nishinoya laughed before crashing his lips onto his own.

 

That’s when it happened. He could feel something settle into the pit of his stomach as heat began to spread like wildfire. The kisses between them growing more intense as his mind began to cloud over with an foriegn feeling. He and Noya had made out plenty of times, but now he could feel his blood rushing and desperate feelings to bring their bodies closer. He could feel every sigh of content, something rising inside of him threatening to burst. Noya broke the kiss with a yelp as Asahi’s eyes fluttered open realizing his hands were traveling a little too south on his back. Realizing what he’d done he slid Noya off his lap and got down on his knees face red with embarrassment. 

 

“I am so sorry Nishinoya I have no idea what came over me!” He had his face to the floor refusing to look at Noya for fear that he made him uncomfortable.

 

“It’s alright Asahi! I didn’t mind at all, I liked the way your hands wandered.” Reaching out to lift his face from the floor, he cocked his head “I thought you weren’t into that kind of stuff.”

 

“I’m not!”

 

“There’s no need to be embarrassed Azumane, it's normal to feel this way~” Noya laughed as Asahi hid his face. Shifting, Noya spoke in an usually serious tone “I’m just teasing, you know that right? I know you’re asexual, we talked about this before we got together. I hope I wasn’t pressuring you with my advances, I told you that all you need to say is no.” 

 

“Never Yuu” He bent down to intertwine their fingers, “that was all me, I just don’t know what came over me. I never had those feelings before...would it be alright if we went back to studying? I don’t think I can handle continuing” 

 

“Don’t apologize for that Azumane! How many times do I have to tell you that I understand you have different feelings.” He could feel Noya plant a kiss on his knuckles  “All you need to do is say no okay? Let's get back into this torture” He picked up the pencil and began to write down again.

 

“Thanks Yuu…” Asahi smiled but still felt confused as to the high he had just experienced, attempting to shake off the feeling.

 

Which leads to the predicament he was feeling, he couldn’t get last night's events out of his head. The way Yuu fit perfectly in his lap, the way Yuu’s lips felt against his own, the way Yuu’s voice sighed against his lips, and Yuu. Yuu. Yuu. Yuu infected his mind and allowed no room for anything else. Running his hands through his messy hair he felt that same fire spread over his body, the sensations rising out of him and any hope of being able to concentrate on the lesson long gone. He felt his chest become tight and breathing impossible as he recalled how wonderful Yuu felt last night. I don’t understand, I thought I was Asexual my whole life, I’ve never felt like this for anyone…not even Yuu when we first began to date. Am I just hungry? I need to talk to someone about this...Letting out a sigh he busied himself with drawing in his notebook knowing he wouldn’t be able to do much else. I’ll ask Sugawara for the notes...oh, maybe I can talk to him about my issue. There isn’t anyone else besides him, Daichi, and Noya I’d feel comfortable discussing this about. Waiting anxiously for class to be over he could feel the heat be replaced with occasional chills down his spine.

Minutes felt like hours as the bell had finally rung signaling the end of the period as the professor dismissed them. Approaching Sugawara he could feel the drumming in his ears, sweaty palms, and anxiety spiking into his chest. This is a bad idea. Maybe I’m just overreacting and I’m not feeling what I think I’m feeling. Yeah, I was probably a little too obsessed about Yuu, I do adore everything about him. I’m just confusing my feelings, maybe I’m touched starved? I am overreacting. I should just keep it to myself... Fortunately or unfortunately Sugawara had felt a presence walking towards him and turned to see Asahi fidgeting and looking disheveled. 

 

“Asahi-san?”

 

“Sugawara-san?” His voice cracked, Oh crap he noticed me…

 

“What’s up?” Suga was packing up but faced Asahi to let him know he was listening.

 

“Um...Do...Do you think you can let me borrow your notes? I-I...I wasn’t paying attention”

 

“Of course Asahi” Suga pursed his lips, a knowing look spreading across his face “But I trust you to tell me what's trulygoing on Asahi-san”. He reached for his bag fligning it over his shoulders, “Should I tell Daichi to wait or do you want it to be just us?”

 

“I...do you mind?” He fiddled with his hands attempting to calm himself down

 

“Not at all, whatever it is must be important. Come let’s go to the roof, most students aren’t there” Sending a text to who he presumed to be Daichi they took their lunches and soon found a spot to sit down.

 

Suga pulled out the notes allowing Asahi to begin scribbling down whatever he had missed. 

 

“So Asahi-san”

 

“Uh…yeah Suga-san?”

 

“What’s the real reason you wanted to talk to me?’

 

Asahi choked turning bright red as he frantically tried to erase the line he had made along his notebook. “Suga you can't just say that out of nowhere!”

 

“Whatever it is has you worked up, so what is it? I don’t mean to rush you but we don't have all day and lunch will end soon if you don’t hurry up” Suga reprimanded 

 

“Sorry Suga….it’s just very hard for me to admit it” Scratching his face he attempted to calm his nerves by focusing on the letters he was trying to copy. Suga just hummed in response resting his arms on his legs waiting for him to continue. “I..I told you I was Asexual right?” He felt the anxiety prickling his skin letting out a shaky sigh.

 

“Of course Asahi, and I hope you know the whole team and I support you. You are valid in not feeling any kind of sexual attraction towards anyone” Asahi sighed a little causing Suga to lower his voice “Did someone try to tell you that you can’t be that? I swear…I’ll send Tanaka on them” 

 

“N-NO SUGA!” Asahi shook his head frantically, “It’s not that Suga! Well, I don’t know…”

 

“Asahi-san?” He felt a squeeze on his shoulder, “You can tell me anything I won’t judge, you know that right?” He nodded. “Then?”

 

“I…” Letting out a shaky sigh he hadn’t realized he had been holding looked at the ground. “It’s just that last night me and...I mean Yuu...NOYA and I were making out and I…”

 

“Did Nishinoya pressure you to do something you didn’t want to?” Suga’s voice got dangerously low. “Cause if he did I will- “

 

“NEVER! Nishinoya would never do anything like that!” Asahi quickly shot up attempting to calm Suga from going into Sugamama mode.

 

“Are you sure?” He eyed him suspiciously as Asahi swallowed a lump in his throat.

 

“O-Of course Suga! You know he has been nothing but respectful towards my boundaries, a-and understands what I can and c-cannot do!” 

 

“Alright...then?”

 

“I-...how do you know if…” He could feel his face burning as the feelings came crashing in waves. “Suga...how did you know…” He coughed a little.

 

“Asahi?”

 

“I-...Suga how do you know...what’s it like...to feel unholy?” Asahi was gripping his pants so tightly his knuckles began to turn white. His whole body was on fire and surprised that Suga couldn’t feel the heat radiating off of him.

 

“Feel unholy?” Suga attempted to bite down the laughter “A-Asahi is everything alright?”

 

“Last night!” Asahi began to mumble “Nishinoya and I were making out as usual a-and normally I don’t feel that much of anything. B-but last night I felt...I felt so b-bizarre! I..normally” taking a breath in he continued '' When we make out it’s just kissing and light grinding cause I-I don't mind and it feels pleasant! L-Last night though my h-hands started wandering and my head was a mess! I was...everything felt so right! A-and before I knew it my hand went t-to low on Noya’s back and…” Asahi heard a chuckle escape before tensing up again.

 

“Asahi you know it's okay to feel aroused by the actions of a person right? That doesn’t make you any less valid, as asexual do experience feeling horny. It’s just they are not attracted to anyone in that manner in normal circumstances.” Suga rubbed Asahi’s back attempting to soothe him down. “It’s not like you are looking at Noya everyday and thinking about how you wanna-”

 

“SUGA-SAN!” Asahi buried his face into his hands as Suga let out a light hearted chuckle before returning to a gentle smile. He attempted to calm his racing heart, looking everywhere but Suga. 

 

“Unless...have you started to feel attracted to Noya in that manner?” Looking up he could see Suga’s eyes widen as he cocked his head to the side.”Asahi?”

 

“...” Feeling the flush rush to his cheeks he sighed as he scratched his cheek again.” I...I don’t remember when exactly it started. All I know is I’ve been feeling odd when I see Noya when we change or when he wraps his legs around my waist when he jumps for a hug..I never experienced anything like that before...I don’t know what it feels like except from reading or movies. I never experienced a feeling like that...so….I-I wanna make sure what I think...what I have been feeling is… is that...the unholy!” He could feel breathing become intense as waves of Yuu came into his mind over and over again. The way his eyelashes fluttered shut when he grabbed his hips, the way Yuu would sneak not so hidden heated looks when they changed, the smile he shone when he triumphed, and the way Yuu loved to tangle his fingers into his locks of brown hair when lips refused to part. It was intoxicating in a way that Noya’s lip biting when he’s thinking became too much for the glass hearted man to handle. “I’m so confused! Am I just overreacting Sugawara?”

 

“Asahi breathe. You are getting worked up again.” Reaching for his hand, Suga began to draw circles around his knuckles. “It’s okay, you’re not overreacting despite how you normally are with these...things.” Suga swallowed down and attempted to soothe the gentle giant. “I may not be able to say what this makes you...but in regards to the first question you asked me...Asahi.” Taking both of his hands into his own.”Asahi...if the speech you just gave me and the look you had on while thinking about Noya...Asahi you are feeling...the unholy as you put it.” Squeezing his hands to a breathing rhythm to help Asahi calm further. “It’s okay to feel this way you know?”

 

“What's Noya gonna think?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“How...How will Noya react to this? C-Can I… can I even tell him?” Asahi felt tears well up from an unknown source. “ Will...will he be mad? I...I technically lied to him I-”

 

“You didn’t!” Suga quickly pulled him in for a hug rubbing his back, feeling him tremble.

 

“B-but I said I was Asexual! That I..I couldn’t feel that kind of attraction, all the times we’ve made out and he g-grinded on me…will he think I wasn’t being honest? W-will he say I was being a perv when I did those things? Am I a perv? Oh God Suga I-”

 

“Asahi shhhh” He could feel Suga begin to rub circles on his back, humming a simple lullaby to get him to focus. “Asahi, Noya loves and trusts you. You know he wouldn’t hold it against you right?”

 

“B-but Suga-san I-”

 

“Asahi!” Suga pulled away and looked straight at Asahi.”We all get confused about what we are, and what we are not. Did you or did you not say you only felt this way recently?”

 

“W-Well yeah but what does this have to do-?”

 

“Then that means you weren’t lying . Asahi everyone knows how much you care and adore Noya, and he knows that better than anyone. Anyone with ears can hear the love in his voice whenever he talks about you . I don’t know what these feelings mean, but I know about one thing...just because you feel it now doesn’t mean you were lying about your sexuality. Now stop telling yourself that because it’s not true.” Suga pulls him back into an even tighter hug as tears begin to roll down his face feeling overwhelmed.

 

“Thank you Suga…”

 

“Don’t thank me, we are here for you no matter what. What this means for your sexuality, and your relationship I’m not sure...but I do know Asahi” Squeezing him once more for reassurance “No matter what happens we all love you and that’s not gonna change. You need to talk to Noya about all of this since communication is key.” Pulling away Suga reached for a napkin in his bag handing it to Asahi “It might be scary but Noya will always listen when it comes to something important. You can do it.”

 

“Thank you…”

 

“What did I say about thanking me Asahi?”

 

“I-I….I’m sorry”

 

“Don’t apologize either!” Suga said lightly smacking the back of his head letting a fond chuckle escape his lips. “Although I don’t want to leave, I promise... we have to get to class. You don’t have to come to practice today if you still feel this anxious, I can just tell them you weren’t feeling well.”

 

“I...I understand...thanks Suga-san”

 

“Anytime Asahi, I hope you feel better.”

 

With that the pair unceremoniously packed up their belongings and walked to class. You could have asked him what he had for lunch, what was his current class, or even his name but he wouldn’t be able to respond back. His mind was on auto pilot as he thought back to the very start of his and Yuu’s relationship. Back when Noya had spontaneously proclaimed his feelings for him as they walked home from practice. The colors of the sunset painting the sky in shades of reds and blues with purple clouds dancing across as the orange rays dyed Noya’s skin. If he could go back he’d want to take a picture of that moment and carry it with him forever. The look of determination in Noya’s voice, the way the blush dusted his cheeks, the way his eyes pierced through him and beneath the gaze all Asahi could feel was loved. There went his mind again thinking about Yuu; about Yuu’s zest for life allowing him to enchant others with his infectious energy. About Yuu’s tenacity making him a force of nature thundering through with unmatched ferocity. About Yuu’s courage to overcome anything in his way, keeping the words of his grandfather to live with no regrets. Yuu who his mind constantly reaches for in this time of unease that it has no room for anything else. Breathing in an attempt to banish the feelings he felt a sigh escape his lips. Gazing into the distance he remembered the response he had given Yuu.

 

For a moment time stopped as he stared at Noya with wide eyes, as he looked ethereal with the sun disappearing.

 

“Noya….” Feeling his head spin, throat closing, lungs forgetting to breathe, and heart threatening to explode out of his chest. He could feel it all threaten to overflow as the stars that began to occupy the sky. “I-I….I can’t”

 

“What? Asahi do you not feel the same way?”

 

“N-NO! I mean It’s not like that! Wait… I do too. I like you so much Noya.”

 

“Asahi, are you being insecure again? How many times do I have to say it, you are wonderful-” Noya began walking towards him as the sun was barely visible on the horizon. He began to rant on everything he adored about him, the whole time Asahi could only focus on the force behind the words as Noya practically shouted at him.

 

“Noya, I can’t go out with you! It...I-I...I’m asexual Nishinoya, I can’t…” Asahi let out a sigh, “I could never go that far with you….I’m not...I can’t give you everything a relationship needs.”

 

“Are you kidding me?”

 

“I’m sorry Noya, I’ll just go if you want me to, I just…”

 

“ Don’t . Asahi, I know you are Asexual and don’t want to ever have intercourse with anyone; including me. I don’t care about that .” He hissed between his teeth as Asahi froze on the spot.”Do you think that all I would ever want in a relationship is sex?”

 

“Nishinoya that’s not what I meant...I”

 

“Listen to me Asahi, and listen well, I don’t care if we never do anything sexual! All I want is for you to stay by my side, for all the highs and baggage that comes with it! I would never have asked you to be my boyfriend if I didn’t feel like I couldn’t handle it.” Crossing his arms with the piercing gaze returning,” Sex isn’t neccessary for a relationship, it never has been and never will be. All I want is to wake up and say that my boyfriend is Asahi Azumane, to love you and be loved in return.” Nishinoya stood in front of him as a breeze passed by, reaching for his hands.”We can figure it out together, that's what being in a relationship means. Azumane...if you feel the same, give us a chance, I’m ready whenever you are.”

 

Asahi pulled Noya in for a hug, feeling tears leave his eyes, “of course Yuu....It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

 

“Then be my boyfriend, let’s figure it out together . Remember what I promised when you came back to the team? I have your back so trust me and keep moving forward.”

 

The bell rang, snapping Asahi out of another trance that distracted him for God knows how long. Shoving his belongings into his bag he walked to his next class just wishing for the day to end. Thoughts of Yuu refused to leave as a warm feeling came over him like the bear hugs Noya loved. Yuu, who, when Asahi is feeling down will do whatever it takes to make him feel better. Yuu, who, when they were first testing the waters, slowed down to walk with him. Yuu, who, when he gets the chance reminds him that he loves him no matter what. Yuu who knows him better than anyone else. Yuu who saw him at his worst and at his best, loving him through it all. Nishinoya Yuu who drove him absolutely mad with all his mischief and teasing. Yuu with his go with the flow attitude accepting cards he’s dealt with little trouble. He loves him and is confident that Noya loves him right back. Feeling tension in his body finally relax he busied himself again copying the notes he saw. That still doesn’t explain those feelings in me...Suga’s right, one way or another I have to talk to Nishinoya. Although I may feel nervous, we did promise to find things out together as a pair. He will have my back no matter what happens. I trust you Noya....

 

Time dragged on as he tried to take down notes as his mind began to wonder once more. What if everything backfires? What if he no longer wants to be with me? What if he breaks up with me cause I lied to him? I never meant to feel this way. I didn’t even know I could ever feel this way towards anyone! I never meant to say I’m asexual only to discover that may not be the case. I...Closing his eyes he glanced at his phone turning on to check the time, 20 more minutes till it ends . Looking at his lockscreen he could see Yuu smiling brightly at the camera while wearing the ace’s jersey. He could feel the oh so tortuous sparks travel through him. The way he looked with his hair down, the mischievous glint in his eyes as he posed seductively making fireworks burn in his stomach. What he thought was once a cute photo of his troublemaker of his love now reminded him of how much Asahi wanted him... Shutting his eyes he recalled the story behind the picture.

 

It was after they had gone out on a date when it rained unexpectedly and they got soaked. After apologizing profusely for not checking the weather as he asked Noya to shower before he got sick. It was only then he realized that his clothes were still wet from the rain. Anxious as ever, Asahi ran to his room in an attempt to find anything that could possibly fit, but being much taller made it impossible. He was still searching when Noya came into his room with a towel wrapped around his waist as he leaned against the door smiling wickedly.

 

“Azu why is your room a mess? Did you not expect me to come over? ” He cocked an eyebrow as he walked into the room.

 

“Noya! What...how long have you been there?”

 

“Azu you can call me Yuu, we are dating”

 

“Sorry No- I mean Yuu. I was just trying to look for something you could wear while your clothes dry.” He smiled sheepishly scratching his face letting his gaze fall on Noya. He looked so different when his hair wasn’t spiked up in gel. “Sorry for the mess, I just can’t find anything.”

 

“Are you sure about that Azumane?” He could tell that he was planning something with the way his voice dipped slightly. The way he said his full name would haunt him in ways even Noya couldn’t dream of.

 

“Yuu whatever it is you’re planning, please no.”

 

“It’s nothing bad!”

 

“You always say that before doing something that gets you and Tanaka in trouble.” Sighing fondly as he could see the glint in Noyas chocolate eyes as something caught his eye. Before he could react to hold him back, he grabbed his jersey from the floor holding it up like a trophy.

 

“I could wear this!” As his signature grin spread across his face.

 

“Noya but that’s too big for you!”

 

“I don’t see that as an issue, and it's not like I have anything else to wear.” He laughed leaving the room with the Aces jersey in hand.

Asahi had been left a blushing mess when he saw Noya walk into the room with his jersey on. As suspected it was too big for him but that only made it more charming as his hair was down, chocolate eyes brightening upon seeing Asahi’s reaction. 

 

“You like what you see?” Wiggling his eyebrows as he threw his head back for extra measure.

 

“Yuu--”

 

“It’s not my fault I’m irresistible.” Laughter bubbling up as he walked proudly in the shirt.

 

“You’re gonna be the death of me!” Shaking his head he pulled Noya in for a hug, “I wish I could keep this moment with me. You’re too beautiful Yuu, it’s unfair. ” He could feel the heat rising to his cheeks as he let the words escape his mouth.

 

“You could take a picture of me if you want to, that way you can always remember your attractive boyfriend wherever you go.”

 

“What...?” He looked into Noya’s eyes feeling his widen.

 

“I said you could take a picture of me you dork….only if you want to tho. I don’t mind posing for my boyfriend.” Letting the boyfriend part drag on a little too long he winked at him, and he could have sworn his soul left his body as he remembered the playful look.

 

“Yuu! Don’t say things like that if you don’t...I mean I wouldn’t be opposed.” Looking away from him choosing to focus on the floor.

 

“Then what are you waiting for? Take a picture then” Noya walked across the room leaning against a chair.

 

“Are you sure you’re okay with it Noya? I don’t want you to feel forced or something.”

 

“Azumane…”He could feel his boyfriend roll his eyes without having to look at his face, ”Would I ask if I felt bothered by it? You know I would tell you if I was uncomfortable, when am I ever dishonest or one to hold back?”

 

“I…”

 

“What was that?” He could sense the impatience coming from Noya as he crossed his arms.

 

“Never Yuu. You always speak your mind no matter what” Holding up his phone camera making sure all of Noya was in the shot, “It’s one of the many things I love about you.”

 

“You love me Azumane?” Clutching his chest and putting a hand on his forehead, “What a scandal! Tell me, what else do you love about me?”

 

“Yuu please!” 

 

“I love you too Asahi~” 

 

“Yuu!”

Looking back at the lock screen he can feel the love radiating off of it as the I love you too rang in his mind. Noya loves me, he loves me as I love him. I...he will be honest with me at the very least no matter what changes. Noya promised to have my back, he always is there. I can’t back out, I have to let him know how I feel... He knows that this is so uncharacteristic of him, but when it came to something as important as this, he had no choice but to be bold. Feeling daring he texted Noya to meet him in front of school before he lost his resolve. He needed to talk with Yuu as soon as possible before the confidence in his body left. Class was over shortly after and texting Suga that he wouldn’t be going to practice. He sprinted to the entrance of the school restlessness spreading knowing he’d soon be able to bury himself into Noyas arms and find out what this meant for them

[quiche-pocket]

So You Think Your Boss Is A Cult Leader, Steve Harrington?

Steve Harrington has a new boss when he starts at the video store. There are three things about him of which Steve is sure:

He speaks some sort of gibberish language that sounds made up

He is on first name basis with high school girls when he has to be at least 30

The dude is clearly up to something and it’s up to Steve to stop him

A/N: I posted a teaser yesterday of what this insanity is about, but as a recap: This story is a gen fic crossover involving Steve Harrington and some other special Stranger Things characters, and Marco Ilsø who plays Hvitserk Lothbrook on the show Vikings. It came about because a video on Instagram back in July showed Marco standing on the side of the road waiting for his brother and he looks lost, and like a little old confused man. Somehow Steve Harrington got pulled into the madness and this is the brain child that came out. This happens post Season 3 of Stranger Things but there should not be any spoilers. Thanks as always to @athroatfullofglass and @x-valhalla for letting me bounce things off of them and helping it make sense! Thank you so much all of you that stop to read this, I know it’s a bit nuts but it’s been so much fun so I hope you all like it also!

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. Their names and likeness belong to the people themselves or the creators. I make no profit off of using the names this is all for fun because I have no sense! The Steve and Dustin gif is from @lunatician and the Marco gif was made by the beautiful allvikingsgifs who is no longer on tumblr.

Warnings: This is PG I would think, possibly Teen. There is a bit of language by minors and adults as well as parties involving high school kids drinking and smoking weed and talking about sex. Also, please note that in this first part Steve is not very sympathetic or understanding of Marco, who he is suspicious of because he is newish to town and speaks another language. Please bear with me in this and remember that these kids have been through a lot with the Russians and the doctors and scientists and everyone. They are likely to be suspicious of everyone, it’s just Steve’s turn this time.  

*************************************************************************************

“So I hear you’re best friends with a bunch of children,” Steve heard from behind him near the end of his first shift at the video store. He pulled his fingers through his hair and took a steadying breath hating this conversation.  

“They aren’t children anymore, they’re high schoolers. But yeah, I spend time with people younger than me. It’s not creepy though!” He said defiantly and spun around to face his new boss. Yelling at him was probably not a great first impression but how does everyone know about Dustin and the rest of them when they’ve never been to the store? Hawkins isn’t that small.  

“Hey, man, no judgement I was just making conversation. High school, though? They cool?” Marco, his boss, was leaning back against the back counter where the tapes were tossed to reshelf. He wasn’t in uniform as it should have been his day off but he was checking up on the new employees, so he had on a peach colored silk shirt with a loud pattern and blue jeans with his black converse.  

“Yeah they’re cool. Well, a couple of them. The girls are a bit weird, but that’s a whole other situation. One of them’s got a shitty home life and the other... I guess she has a pretty shitty home life too. But yeah, they’re cool.” Steve turned and greeted a couple of girls who had just come in the door. He kicked up the charm and flipped his hair before jumping over the counter and heading over to them.  

“Hey Marco,” one of the girls giggled and waved. He grinned and started organizing the tapes on the counter.

“So, Marco,” the same girlish voice came from behind him and he walked over to the register, leaning on the counter so they were eye to eye.  

“What’s up, Becky? You here to get the ones I told you about on Saturday?”  

Steve was standing off to the side watching the exchange with morbid curiosity. As soon as he’d walked over to the girls, they had split and not given him the time of day. Then they had been giggling and whispering before Becky, apparently, went to talk to his boss. It didn’t look like Marco was flirting, but the girl definitely was. She was blushing and tucking her hair behind her ear and leaning in whenever she had something to say. Steve didn’t have trouble with the ladies so much anymore, but he had never seen someone work it this easily outside of high school jocks.  

“Rita let’s go!” Becky called and she straightened the hem of her bright colored mini skirt before flouncing off to the door, her friend materializing from behind a rack. “See you on Saturday Marco!” Both girls giggled again and waved. Steve watched his boss smirk and wave back.  

“Have a good day, girls!” Steve called and they both froze, staring at him, before bursting into shrieking laughter and running out the door.  

To say Steve was embarrassed was putting it mildly. Marco hadn’t commented on the reaction of Becky and her friend, but Steve heard a snicker before his back was turned. Heading back behind the counter he started to get ready to hand the shift over to Robin when she got there in a bit. No one else was in the store, Marco had gone into the back office again, so Steve leaned against the counter to think over what he had just witnessed.  

Steve knew very little about his new boss, but he knew he was older and had been in town off and on since Steve had graduated from high school and just like everyone else in this town, he seemed to have some baggage. He had a weird accent and was very private from what Steve could tell. His taste in movies and music was killer, though, Steve had to respect the man for that. But what the hell was he doing hanging out with high school girls on the weekends? Was the guy a creep? Had Steve completely misread him? Maybe he did stuff with a church? Or did he teach classes at the YMCA? Maybe he did tutoring like Nancy did. Marco didn’t seem like the kind of guy to help underprivileged kids, but clearly Steve didn’t know enough about him to rule it out. 

“Hey dingus!” Steve’s head fell to the counter when he heard Robin’s telltale greeting. “How many did you strike out with this time?”

“None, thank you very much...” He was about to defend himself when another voice joined in.

“Two, actually.” Steve whirled around again to face Marco who was leaning against the door frame, eyes laughing. “At the same time.” Robin let out a howl of laughter and this time Marco did join in. There was a bond between them that made Steve nervous. Any time Robin sided with someone else against Steve it never worked out well. He’d need to look somewhere else for backup on what this guy’s story is.  

“Fun as this is, if you’re here Robin then I’m out. Got a date tonight!” Robin rolled her eyes and punched him in the shoulder.  

“A night at home with your door locked and a bottle of lotion is not a date, dingus.” Steve did not dignify that with a response, choosing to make a face at her like the mature adult that he was at eighteen years old. She just waved her hand dismissing him and went behind the counter to start organizing the tapes to go back.  

Steve heard Marco say something that sounded like gibberish and Robin laughed.

“Ja, han er en idiot*,” Robin replied. Steve understood the last word and turned to glare at her. That’s it, Steve decided, if Robin had joined a cult with this asshole where they speak in code he was going to get to the bottom of it. Time to bring in reinforcements.  

*Yeah, he’s an idiot

*************************************************************************************

Steve knocked on the door and waited anxiously, shifting his weight between his feet.  

“Steve, hello! What a nice surprise,” Mrs. Henderson opened the door, holding a struggling cat in one arm.

“Hi Mrs. H. how are you? I wanted to stop by and see if Dustin was here?”  

“Yes of course, he’s upstairs! Come in. Would you like juice or some lemonade?” She asked, still trying to wrestle the cat and usher Steve into the entryway.  

“Oh no thanks, Mrs. H. I actually can’t stay long I just need to talk to Dustin really fast. New cat?” He asked, feeling awkward now just standing there with her.

“Yes! Dusty got him for me for my birthday, isn’t he perfect?” To be honest, the cat looked a little deranged but who was Steve to ruin this sweet woman’s view of her new pet.  

“Yeah, yeah he’s great.” Steve gingerly held a hand out to the cat when Dustin’s mom lifted him closer. The cat slashed the air with one lightning fast paw and Steve leapt backwards, knocking into the stair banister and kicking the coat rack.  

“Mom?” Dustin called down the stairs at the commotion. “Is everything okay?” There were footsteps and suddenly a curly haired face appeared at the top of the stairs peering down anxiously. The expression cleared immediately when he saw Steve. “Hey buddy! What’s up? Come on up, I’m just getting started on a new project.”

Steve waved at Mrs. Henderson and gave a wide berth to avoid the cat while going around the banister to meet Dustin.

“Dusty don’t kill the power today, okay? The neighbors are getting mad. You boys have fun, though,” and with that she headed down the hallway to what Steve knew was the kitchen. She’d likely be up in a few minutes with a plate of snacks and some juice.  

Steve hurried up the steps and followed Dustin into his room.  

“What’s up, man? I didn’t know you were coming by today. I’ve got a new game, wanna play?”  

“No, Dustin, I’m here because we have a problem.” Steve’s eyes were slightly manic and Dustin froze before going into panic mode.  

“What! What happened! Is it the Russians? Did the gate open again? We have to call Eleven!” Dustin started to flail around grabbing at the walkie-talkie before Steve hit him upside the head to get his attention.

“No it’s not that!” Steve took a deep breath, drawing out the drama to maximum levels. “It’s my boss.”

“At the video store?”  

“No shit at the video store! He’s up to something, man, and I don’t know what it is. I can’t ask Robin to help because I think he’s got her involved in it too! They were speaking in code today and I just know he’s recruiting her into some government experiment or cult or something!” Steve’s voice rose and became higher pitched as he talked. Dustin started to look panicked again.

“Okay okay. Start at the beginning.” Dustin went to his desk and pulled out a notebook and a pen, looking at Steve expectantly.

“Well he speaks this weird language and it sounds totally made up. He talks out of the corner of his mouth, which he doesn’t do when he’s talking to me like normal people.”

“You mean talking to you in English?” Dustin asked and there was a small smirk on his lips.

“Yeah. Shut up it’s weird.” Steve replied defensively.

“Sure, I bet it’s totally weird man. What else makes you think he’s up to something besides his made up language?”  

“Well, he’s got to be old, right? Like 30. And he’s talking to Becky and Rita at the store about hanging out on the weekend. What adult hangs out with people that much younger than him?” Steve was pacing and missed Dustin rolling his eyes.  

“Okay so he speaks another language. And he hangs out with high schoolers. And he works with you at the video store.” Dustin trailed off. “What else have you got?”  

Steve looked at him in exasperation.  

“Isn’t that enough? Dude is weird. And Robin likes him. Robin doesn’t like anybody but she’s in there laughing and joking with him and talking in that weird code. We need to do some digging, Dustin, this guy is bad news.”  

“Wait, is this about Robin? Dude we’ve been over this. You and she have been over this. It’s never ever going to happen without some serious work being done on your part and even then...” Steve threw a pillow from Dustin’s bed at him.  

“No this is not about Robin!” Steve cried. “This is about a creepy stranger who I work for and I think he’s up to some gnarly stuff and needs to be stopped! Are you going to help me or not? Please don’t make me go to Nancy, Jonathan is visiting and I don’t want to deal with them.”

“I’ll help, dude. We need to set up surveillance. When does he work next? Maybe we can go over to his house and look through the windows and garbage. Or we can try and follow him this weekend?”

“Let’s start at the house, he should be at work all day tomorrow. I want to get to the bottom of this as quickly as possible.” Steve gave a determined nod and that was the end of that conversation.

“All right, we will go tomorrow after school and look around. Don’t worry buddy, we’ll figure this out whatever it is!” Dustin held his hand out and they shook on it then Steve sat down and watched Dustin set up his new game.  

*************************************************************************************

While waiting outside the high school for Dustin to come out, Steve had a lot of time to think about what they were about to do. He’d done plenty of spying and sneaking around over the years, mostly with Dustin and the others, but this time was different. It felt more personal and therefor more dangerous.  

A bang on his window brought Steve out of his deep thoughts and he flailed before he heard the loud bursts of laughter from outside his car. Dustin was at the passenger window with his hands on his knees gasping for breath between guffaws and Lucas was just behind him pointing and drawing even more attention. Steve leaned over and unlocked the door and Dustin got in front and Lucas in the back.  

“Uh, I thought it was just you and me, man,” Steve glanced behind him at Lucas who was still snickering while putting his seatbelt on.

“Well, I figured we could use a lookout or something, and Lucas is good at finding clues and stuff. Would you rather I brought Mike?” Dustin cocked his head and Steve rolled his eyes.

“No. Don’t be stupid. It’s fine, let’s just go.”  

As they drove through town the two younger boys bantered about some science experiment Dustin claims Lucas and Will ruined. Lucas said it was Mike’s fault. Dustin said it was Lucas’s. Steve was getting a headache and they hadn’t even gotten to the house yet.  

It wasn’t hard to find the house Marco had bought a few months before. It was close to the video store and the gas station. The yard was well kept but bare except for one tree and two bushy shrubs near the front window. No cars were in the driveway as they expected, so Steve drove down to the end of the street and parked before they circled back to the house on foot and crept around to where the trash can was.  

“Okay, you two start here, I’m going to see if I can see anything through the windows back there. Thank God it’s not a two story house.” Steve sighed and the other two looked like they were going to protest at being on trash duty so he took off around the side of the house before they could start.  

Steve looked in the kitchen window first as it was the first one he came to. Nothing seemed out of place. There was a small table with two bar stools, a loaf of bread on the counter and some dirty dishes in the sink. Boring. Moving along the wall he looked in on a living room with a TV and VCR and way more seating than a single guy would need. There were those small blankets that the Wheeler’s have on their couches and chairs. Steve even saw coasters to put under drinks. Did this dude have a girlfriend no one knew about? Was he gay and was trying to impress a new boyfriend? He didn’t seem like he was, but Robin always said Steve’s gaydar was missing. What was this guy’s deal?

“Steve! Come here!” He heard Lucas call and he jogged over to the trash can.  

“So, mostly we found chip and cracker bags, egg cartons, bologna and cheese packages and hamburger meat wrappers...” Dustin rattled off quickly.

“Okay, food trash. You didn’t call me over here for that did you? Besides that being a lot of trash for one guy.” Steve interrupted.  

“No!” Lucas yelled and Steve glared at him. “Look what’s in the bottom!”  

Steve peered over the side of the can and saw the bottom third was full of alcohol bottles. Not beer. Hard alcohol. Spirits or whatever the snobby people his parents used to bring around called it. There was everything from tequila to whiskey and none of it looked like the stuff Steve and his friends normally drank. It looked halfway decent but there was so much. No way one guy drank this much between pickup days which brought him back to his discoveries spying in the windows.  

“Well maybe he doesn’t live alone,” he started but Dustin cut him off.

“Steve no one has ever seen anyone with him. He’s not dating any of the girls in town.” Lucas and Dustin looked at each other and were about to go off on another tangent that Steve wouldn’t be able to break up.

“No, shut up listen! His house is weird. There are way too many places to sit and he has those blankets like they have over at the Wheeler’s cause Mrs. Wheeler thinks they look good. And he has coasters! No bachelor has coasters. So he’s either got a girlfriend. Or he’s gay. But that doesn’t change the fact that it’s weird no one has ever seen him with someone!” Steve ended defensively.

“Or maybe,” Dustin’s eyes were shining. “Maybe he has his mom in the basement like,” he looked at Lucas and they finished together, “Norman Bates in Psycho!”  

Steve stared at them both. Everyone was officially loony again and that’s all there is to it. The younger boys looked back at him like they were thinking the same thing about Steve.  

“Look. It doesn’t matter what you two are talking about. Whatever the reason he has all that fancy stuff is, he’s still a weirdo and he’s bringing Robin into his cult and possibly all the other teenage girls in town! He’s the next Charles Manson unless we stop him.” Steve had that manic look in his eyes again and Dustin stepped forward with a cautious hand extended to try and appease him.  

“I’m not totally sure what quilts and blankets and coasters have to do with cults, but I think we need to calm down a little bit buddy. This guy is someone who moved into town a little while ago and no one really knows him.”

“Except Robin and all the other girls.” Steve interrupted. Dustin sighed.  

“Yes. Except Robin and the two other girls who you can prove know of him, except that only one actually spoke to him. So two girls that are younger than him. Do you know who else hangs out with two girls that are younger than him?” Dustin and Lucas look at Steve with innocent eyes but are obviously holding back snickers.  

“Shut up both of you! It’s not the same and you know it. I’ve known you guys forever, and I don’t hang out with El and Max, I hang out with you guys sometimes and they happen to be there. But either way!” his voice rose and Steve started to walk back to the street so he could go to his car. “Either way, this was helpful. We know he’s an alcoholic and may have a woman staying with him or he’s gay. He speaks in gibberish. And he talks to, and associates with, girls who are more than ten years younger than him I’d bet. That’s enough for me. I say we get ready to follow him this weekend. I’m off on Saturday, I’ll pick both of you up and we can do some more investigating and follow him around.” At that he strode off with newfound purpose.  

The house hadn’t provided the concrete evidence he had hoped for, like a body laying out on the table with machines hooked up to it. Or a group of naked people having a drum circle in the yard like he saw in that Manson family documentary Nancy and Jonathan made him watch with them. The house did provide more proof that Marco was weird and that Steve needed to work a little harder to find out exactly what his damage was.  

*************************************************************************************

Saturday morning Dustin showed up at Steve’s house on his bike alone, thank God. He didn’t want to deal with the others today it was stressful enough. Robin had been asking questions the whole day before about what his plans were for today. She would not accept his answer of spending time with his parents so he had to tell her he and Dustin were hanging out.  

“All right dude here’s the plan. You are going to go down to the store and see if he’s there. See if you can hear anything. I’ll wait out back and see if anything looks weird back there.” Dustin gave a mocking salute and headed to the front of the building.  

Steve wandered and checked the back of the store. Nothing looked out of place or unusual. There were boxes and trash typical of getting new stock to the store. It looked like today was going to be just as much of a bust as going to the house had been. That’s when he heard a voice from an open window right above him. He dove behind his car and pulled out the recorder he’s started carrying everywhere thanks to Dustin and the others.

“Nej jeg tror fire vil gøre,” * Steve craned his neck as far as he could. There it was again! Who was he talking to on the phone in that gibberish?  

“Har du dem lige nu? Jeg har venner over.” * Marco paused as the person on the other end responded.  

“Ja det vil være fint. Fire af dem, og hvis du har kablerne til at gå med det jeg har brug for dem også.” *

“Tak. Jeg kommer forbi lageret i aften.” *

The back door to the store banged open loudly and Marco stepped out. He ran his fingers through his hair and tilted his face up to the sun. Moments like this and he looked perfectly normal, but then the conversation Steve had overheard came to mind and he remembered the objective. Marco sat down on the steps and lit a cigarette. The smell wafted over and Steve’s mouth watered. He hadn’t had a cigarette in months and the smell was almost too tempting. Steve stayed hidden behind his car the whole time Marco was out there but no other developments were discovered. As Marco stood and dusted his pants, Steve saw Dustin coming around the corner. He waved his hands trying to get the kid’s attention but Dustin didn’t notice until he was too close.  

“Hey, aren’t you the kid who was just inside talking to Robin?” Marco called out and Steve sunk down by the wheel of his car praying to whoever listened that he wouldn’t come any closer.  

“Uh...” Dustin froze.  

“Wait, you’re one of Steve’s friends too, right? You know both of them?” Marco’s voice was getting closer and Dustin’s eyes flashed to Steve before he walked around the car to keep Marco from coming any closer and discovering him.  

“Uh, yeah. Steve. Yeah he and I are buds. He’s how I met Robin, they used to work together at the ice cream place in the mall. He’s cool, though. Steve’s helped me a lot. He’s awesome.” Never before had Steve been so grateful for how easily Dustin can ramble.  

“Yeah, he seems cool, just kind of quiet.” Marco replied thoughtfully. “So what are you doing back here?”  

“Oh uh....” Steve closed his eyes and willed Dustin to be convincing. “I’m uh working on a school project and uh we have to use scraps and stuff so uh Robin told me I could look in the trash back here?” Dustin’s voice rose in tone at the end making him sound unsure but hopefully Marco didn’t notice.  

“Cool. Help yourself, man.” Footsteps started walking back toward the open door and Steve let out a sigh of relief. “Hey, kid, wait a second. What’s your name?”

“Who me?” Dustin’s voice cracked. Steve was going to have to work with him on keeping cool under pressure. Luckily Marco laughed.

“Yeah, kid, what’s your name?”

“Dustin. Dustin Henderson.”

“Well Dustin Henderson, I’m Marco since we haven’t officially met. I have these get togethers on Saturday nights at my house, just some cool people hanging out. There’s one tonight. If you’re interested you should stop by.” Steve’s jaw dropped and he almost leapt out from behind his car to swing on this creep!  

“Uh, yeah sure sounds good. Thanks!” Dustin sounded panicked and Steve closed his eyes again praying they make it through this.  

“Cool. I’ll see you tonight then maybe.” The back door banged shut and Dustin ran around Steve’s car.  

“DID YOU HEAR THAT?!” He shrieked and Steve shushed him and pulled Dustin down on the ground next to him.

“Yes I heard! The window is still open keep your voice down!” He growled and Dustin apologized. “Before you came around I heard him on the phone in his office, he was talking in that other language again. I recorded it so we can try and translate back at your house. But what the hell was he inviting you to? You have to go! Bring Lucas or Will with you, but you have to go and see what it is that he does!”  

“Are you crazy?! I’m not going to be bait!” Dustin was shrieking again and Steve jumped up, pulling him along and getting into the car.  

“You won’t be bait! We’ll be there with you. I’ll be down the street since I’m not invited to whatever freaky thing he’s got planned, but this is the best way to figure it out. Just go long enough to see what he’s up to and then you can come out and I’ll take you home. Deal?”

Dustin sighed and rolled his eyes. Steve smirked knowing he’d won.

“Deal. But you had better be there waiting for me to come out. I’m talking car running, door open, I jump in as you’re rolling by!”

“Don’t be so dramatic, everything will be fine.” Steve made his tone nonchalant. He wasn’t about to admit that he was just as nervous as Dustin.  

*No I think four will do

*Do you have them right now? I’m having some friends over

*Yeah that’s fine. Four of those and if you have the cables to go with it I need those too.

* Thanks. I’ll come by the warehouse tonight.

*************************************************************************************

“So he’s asking about some kind of equipment that requires cables and he’s going to pick them up today maybe?” Dustin was pacing around his bedroom.  

It had taken over an hour for them to translate what Marco said during his phone call. Now that they had the one side of the conversation nothing made any more sense than before. Steve had finally convinced Dustin that going to this thing at Marco’s was going to be fine and they had two escape plans in place. Don’t let it be said that after getting stuck or kidnapped the third time that these two hadn’t learned something.  

“I have no idea what it means, but if he’s getting them today then maybe you’ll find out tonight?” Steve suggested as he was digging through Dustin’s closet. “Dude. Do you have anything with a collar?”  

“A collar? What? What do I need a collar for?”  

“To hide the wire, duh! That way we can stick the mic out the collar and hide it. You can record everything at the thing.” Steve kept pulling out shirts and checking them but Dustin let out a sigh and pushed him out of the way. He dug into the back of the closet and pulled out a hideously patterned short sleeved shirt, throwing it at Steve’s head.

“Will that work?” Dustin asked.  

“I mean, yeah if you’re doing a side job as a kid’s birthday clown!” Steve was cracking up but Dustin didn’t find it funny at all and just stared. “I’m joking. Kind of, but this thing is hideous dude. It’ll work, though.” He tossed the shirt back to Dustin who went to the bathroom to shower and get dressed. Steve was going to work on Dustin’s hair like he did for the last dance. The goal was to get him looking nice enough that no one would notice if he was hanging around Marco too much. Or if he had a microphone taped to his upper chest. Before tonight was over Steve wanted absolute proof that his boss was up to something shady because the more he saw and heard of him, the stranger things seemed.  

*************************************************************************************

There were a few cars on the street outside of Marco’s house when Steve drove by with Dustin and Mike. Steve was surprised it was Mike that came and not Lucas, but Dustin said Mike was really into it when he told him what was going on. The number of cars didn’t match the mass of shadows that Steve saw behind the blinds, though.  

“Okay, you two know the plan?” Steve turned in his seat to see Dustin next to him and Will with his long legs spread in the back. They both nodded but Steve raised an eyebrow. Dustin rolled his eyes.  

“We go in, we see who’s there and what is going on. If we see anything that looks like a sacrifice or “special kool aid we leave immediately. If everything looks okay then we find Marco and we record what he says. We want to know what he’s doing and why it’s such a secret and what his master plan is.” Will recited back in a monotone.  

“Good. Okay, I’m going to be right out here so if anything happens you just yell out a door or a window or whatever and I’m coming in. I wish there was a way to have you guys take the walkie talkie.”

“Steve,” Dustin interrupted, “It’s too big. We talked about it and there’s no way. We’ll be okay.” He looked in the back and Mike nodded. Dustin nodded back. “Yeah. We’ll be okay. We’ll be out in a couple of hours with an update or to go home.”  

Steve watched them get out of the car and he rolled the windows down. He wished he could go in there with them, but it would have been too suspicious. Dustin seemed more confident so Steve should be too. When the boys got to the door and Marco opened it, Steve caught a glimpse of two girls just behind him, but then the door shut quickly. Now all he could do was wait.  

@athroatfullofglass @x-valhalla @westcoastselkie @hissouthernprincess @lol-haha-joke @ainatirb-j

[stopforamoment]

Nothing New Pussycat (See You Next Tuesday)

Book: The Royal Romance (After Book Three) Pairing: Bastien Lykel x OFC Rinda Parks Word Count: 3,571 Rating: R for Language and Adult Situations TRIGGERS: Unwanted sexual contact, discussion of rape, rape culture, male dominance, use of the P and C words for female genitals, C in a derogatory way “Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.” Margaret Atwood

Author’s Note: Obligatory disclaimer that Pixelberry Studios owns the TRR characters and my pocketbook with those darn diamond scenes. OFC with all of her quirks is all mine. My apologies if Tumblr or I do something stupid when I try to post this. This was inspired by @kennaxval’s story The Queens of Stormholt part 5: Kenna’s Choice (NSFW) and by Hulu/Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale. I’ve been catching up on episodes this past week! This takes place the second week of the school year, in September.

Crackpot Ear Worm: Tom Jones “What’s New Pussycat” 

He was a rich, arrogant, helicopter parent whose son did nothing wrong. He also didn’t give a fuck about his marriage vows, and he thought it would be an interesting challenge to conquer the American widow who wouldn’t take off her wedding ring. At first Rinda was oblivious. She was used to dealing with helicopter parents, and she assumed his false flattery was the first step toward getting his son out of an after-school detention that Rinda gave him. As annoying as that was, Rinda preferred that to what usually came next. The incessant badgering and, eventually, threats. Rinda sighed. Time to draw upon her professionalism and boilerplate commentary to get through this one-on-one meeting that he insisted upon. Rinda had been married, and to a police officer, so she was relatively safe for over 10 years. But she got complacent, thinking she would be respected at least for her status as a mother and widow, with the added bonus that she was in her 40s and past her prime. She honestly thought that sex would no longer be used as a weapon against her. Her gender, yes. Always. But sex? Well, maybe unconsciously. Okay, yes. She knew. But she had hoped that sex couldn’t still be used as a weapon against her. That was a small part of why she still wore her wedding ring and kept her married name. Most people would take the hint and know that she should be left the fuck alone. But she truly wasn’t prepared to deal with all of that bullshit again. . . . . .

Rinda was a warrior preparing for battle. She took the time to move her desk so she could sit behind it. That was a Power Move 101. She preferred to keep her desk against a wall because it took up less space, it was easier to throw her squish ball against the wall, and it was just easier to work with the children who needed to sit next to her when she tutored him. But not for this meeting. Bastien and Julian offered to help her move the desk, but Laura just laughed and told them to get the fuck lost. Rinda was in her woman hear me roar mode, and she didn’t need a man’s help. Although as soon as they left she did need to meekly ask Laura for help. Then she strategically placed chairs on the other side of her desk. Laura had to take her dad to a doctor’s appointment, so she wouldn’t be in the room. But Julian and Bastien would be in their rooms, ready to rescue Rinda if necessary. And Julian and his husband Theo would take her out for a drink afterward so she could defrag and repeat every wicked one-liner that she wanted to say but couldn’t. . . . . . He walked into her room, unannounced and 20 minutes early, which Rinda was expecting. But she was still helping another student. And of course, she was sitting next to the student, in another student desk, so she could help her. Rinda stayed seated in the too-small chair, looking up at the father and calmly asking to come back in 10 minutes, when she was finished helping her student. When it’s actually your appointment time. He informed Rinda that he was a busy man and his time was valuable. Right, so that’s why you’re 20 minutes early and harassing me when you could just wait in the hall and check emails or something. Professional Mrs. Parks nodded and related to that. She was also very busy, especially right now, and the sooner she could get back to helping her student the sooner she could begin their appointment. But he wasn’t leaving. She extricated herself from the student desk as gracefully as possible, calmly walking up to him, trying not to flinch. She hated doing that. Approaching someone simply to assert herself. She was 5’3” and really, if he refused to leave what could she do? Call in Bastien to escort him out? God, how humiliating. Needing help from the freaking head of security because there was a rude asshole who refused to leave her room. A man who was being shitty because she was a woman and there wasn’t much she could do about it. Remember, Rinda. You’re white. You’re cis. You’re straight. You’ve had amazing educational opportunities, and you’re comfortably middle class. Other people who deal with this shit have less privilege than you.

He ogled her. No other word to explain it. She stood and took it, hoping her body language didn’t betray her fear and anger. Even though she wore loose clothing and no makeup, it didn’t matter. Even if he was really thinking about last night’s football game while simply pretending to undress her with his eyes as a way to intimidate her, it didn’t matter. He was sizing her up, sexualizing her, dismissing her as a professional with post-college degrees and years of teaching experience. Every woman, every person who has been de-humanized, denigrated, and disparaged, has a way to cope with it. They have a plan in place to ensure their literal survival. When Rinda was younger she swore that she would go down fighting. That she would rather die than let it happen to her. Again. But now that she was older, a mother with a son who didn’t have a father, it was different. There was a lot more that she was willing to take if it meant she could come home to Henry when it was over. And really, being in your 40s with a wedding ring and a kid did make life easier. You were overlooked a lot. What a blessing. But not now. Now she was targeted. But fortunately he chose to wait in the hallway, and Rinda only hoped the young girl who was patiently waiting for Mrs. Parks wouldn’t subconsciously remember this incident. The time when her female teacher, the adult in charge, was challenged just because a man wanted to. Just because he could. . . . . .

When Rinda invited him in he closed the door after him. Friendly Rinda. “Oh, you can just leave the door open.” Cocky asshole with the smug grin. “Why? You don’t trust yourself to be alone with me in a closed room?” No, I don’t trust you, and you know it, you fucking asshole. How dare you try to spin this, as if I wanted anything from you except some basic fucking respect. Delusional douche canoe prick. Professional Mrs. Parks lying through her teeth. “It’s school policy.” Quickly get behind your desk. It’s a barrier and you’ll be safe. Wait, fuck. Did he open the door? Fuck me. He didn’t. If I let it go, he wins. If I open it for him, he wins. God damn this fucker to hell. Rinda motioned for him to take a seat and she opened the door. Julian was discreetly waiting in the hallway and he gave her an encouraging nod for support. She started to walk back to her desk. That fucker moved the chair so I’m going to have to practically grind him to get around him and retreat behind my desk. Retreat. Fuck this. She channeled an image of Justin Trudeau dealing with Donald Trump’s power play handshake. I’m not backing down from this prick.

She moved the other chair, the one on his side of her desk, further away from the man. She sat down, discreetly moving her legs to the side before crossing them at the ankles so there was no danger of her pulling a Paris Hilton or Sharon Stone. Mom taught Rinda as a very young girl to sit carefully and keep her legs closed so she wouldn’t show her Unaussprechlichen.  Rinda, you know. Rinda laughed to herself, realizing as an adult that the humor of that unspeakable word was lost on her mother. Grandma Lorinda would say vagina. Rinda, it’s a vagina. Nothing to be ashamed of. It’s yours, no one else’s. You can call it your Muschi, your pussy or cunt, if that’s what you want. As long as it’s respected and the words used to describe it are spoken with love. Crossing her legs. That wouldn’t be interpreted as discreet by a man like him. No, it would only draw his eyes there, to the Unaussprechlichen.  Crossing your legs at the knee, more sexual. You’re flirting. Crossing at the ankles, more demure and lady-like. But then you’re a prude. Thank God I wore a long skirt today.

He tried wheedling, he tried flirting. Rinda remained professional. She stood by the detention. He leaned in, but Rinda was far enough away that he would have to move his chair closer to invade her personal space. Ha! Score one for Rinda Parks. Oh, fuck. He really is moving his chair closer. Oh fuck, and he’s owning it, like it’s a welcomed advance, not his weakness. Rinda was sure her eyes were changing colors, that sure tell that she was afraid or upset. Hopefully he didn’t know that about her, even though it was hard to miss. Hopefully he couldn’t see how pale she was and didn’t catch her target glance to the door. God, how many times have women and other victims been in this situation, trying to gauge if they stood a better chance of survival if they tried to run or if they stayed still and took it. Rinda, you’ve got this.

He “accidentally” brushed her knee when he sat back down, his face dangerously close. Do I ignore it? If I call him out, will he laugh? Think I’m a bitch who’s playing hard to get? Tell me I imagined it? Rinda tried to stay focused, but she was livid. What if the roles were reversed? What if I just grabbed his cock and gave it a squeeze to assert my dominance? To get my shits and giggles off seeing another person squirm. How would that make you feel, asshole? Ugh. He’d probably love it. Spread his legs and force me to kneel, mouth open, to give him more.

The meeting ended with the usual threat that he would contact the principal, someone who was more reasonable and had more power than her. Fine. Whatever. Just get the fuck out of my face. At least he didn’t threaten her job or remind her that his tax dollars paid her salary. “I’ll have your job for this.” That one always cracked Rinda up. Bitch, please. You’ll “have” it? You want it? Go for it. You wouldn’t last an hour. Rinda let him stand up first. She was wearing a shirt with a high neckline. Nothing to see there and she’d rather be the one passively sitting, even if he was looking down at her, instead of the one standing and hoping he would get up to leave. He waited until they got into the hallway before overtly asserting his dominance. Maybe that was for the best. She wasn’t trapped behind her desk. She wasn’t trapped in the room. And really, it was comical how he thought he could just finish being an absolute ass, telling her that he would go above her head to get satisfaction, and then suddenly inform Rinda that he would take her out and show her a good time. He’d still get satisfaction from her in one way or another. He knew that she was lonely and needed a man’s company. And he’d give it to her. I’m way too old for this shit. Haven’t I paid my dues, yet? Isn’t that supposed to be a benefit of getting older and losing the bloom off the rose? Rinda laughed to herself. Her middle name was Rose. Damn that was pretty funny, Rinda. Okay, stay with it. You can’t use humor to deflect yourself out of this one. Rinda’s eyes darted around, taking in her surroundings. Julian was staying late for her. His door was open and he moved his work station so he could keep an eye on the hallway. She looked over and saw him watching her. And even though she couldn’t see him, she knew Bastien was near. She always felt his comforting presence when he was near. Maybe he was in the room with Julian, or just around the corner. But she was safe. It would be okay. At least this time. She started by purposely misunderstanding him. Not that anyone could misinterpret that lecherous smirk. Of course she would be happy to meet with him and his wife, at school, if they’d like to further discuss the matter. No? Not at school? But she only met with parents at school. Oh, but this wasn’t a professional matter. And his wife wouldn’t be joining him. And now he was leering, and even though Rinda knew she would be physically safe because Julian and Bastien were there, she wasn’t sure which reaction would be worse for her career. Fight or flight. She was so thankful they were here. Refusing their help to move her desk, feeling embarrassed that the head of security might have to escort this man out. She didn’t care anymore. Her pride was so goddamn trivial right now. She was just so fucking thankful they were here. The reality was that she was a woman who couldn’t handle it by herself. And Julian and Bastien were strong men, good men. She wouldn’t even have to ask. One of them, if not both, would stay to make sure she got into her car safely. Even follow her home if necessary. God I hate being a woman.

And then she felt the nausea. Did men think that women were just playthings? Did he care at all about his wife? His family? Did he even care that she said “no” several times, that he was making her uncomfortable, that she was still in love with Jameson? That this asshole’s very presence was violating her? No. He didn’t care. That was part of his fun. Bastien was in the hallway, gauging the situation. He would be able to step in at any time, but he remembered Rinda’s reaction earlier that day when she was struggling to move the desk by herself. He knew why she refused their help. In any other situation he and Julian would have teased Rinda for being so stubborn. But they knew to let that one go. He knew Rinda could handle herself now, and he wanted to be sure Rinda knew that, but he was right there if she needed any help. The man grabbed Rinda’s arm and Bastien saw the golden topaz in her eyes. The look of controlled fury that shook even him. He thought Rinda was upset that this man touched her. He didn’t realize it was so much more than that. This man was arrogant enough to even think he had a chance to replace Jameson, even if it was for only the few pathetic, unsatisfying minutes he might last if Rinda would allow him to enter her. That’s what it boiled down to, for her. Not his disrespect to her, or to his wife, but to Jameson. Her Jameson was a hero who sacrificed his life to save Cassie. People who didn’t know Jameson only saw the gruff exterior. They couldn’t understand how someone as light-hearted as Rinda could ever see anything in a person who was so serious. But they didn’t know the Jameson that Rinda did. The tender-hearted man who would do anything to make Rinda laugh. The one who adored her. He was her beloved. When Jameson came home after a long day of work she would serenade him with her loudest and most awful rendition of Tom Jones’ “What’s New Pussycat?” just to make him smile And no one else knew that when Officer Parks came home he became Rinda’s sweet and silly Miezekatze as she kissed his nose, those laugh lines around his eyes, that adorable dimple, and his irresistible lips. How dare he think he’s anywhere close to knowing what it means to be a man. To replacing Jameson. . . . . .

Rinda could have extricated herself from his grasp with a basic self defense move. And she could have run away, knowing that Bastien would take care of the rest for her. But she didn’t. Instead she turned his wrist and brought her elbow up to the underside of his elbow. Anger and adrenaline gave her the power to deliver a strong hit to his elbow. There was a sickening crack and the man immediately dropped to the ground, cursing Rinda. Calling her a bitch cunt whore who didn’t know who he was. Who she just messed with. How he would ruin her professionally. How he would find her and make her pay. How he would wrap his fingers around her throat and enjoy watching her eyes bulge as he strangled her. How he would find her and make her pay. Tear her a new asshole. Fuck her until she needed a new asshole. He would destroy her. He would kill her. Rinda didn’t hear most of it. Bastien was already dragging the man away, the man’s rants fading down the hallway. Julian gently pulled Rinda into his room and closed the door while he called the police and paramedics.

Bastien reassured Rinda that it was self defense and he was proud of her for defending herself so well. Bastien truly meant it as a compliment, and he was impressed with her. But Julian and Rinda looked at each other and they both knew it wasn’t that simple, and that Bastien sounded patronizing even though it was unintentional. Rinda also knew that Julian and his husband faced discrimination and hatred far more often than she ever would, and she was so grateful to have him with her that night. Bastien could help explain the factual details of what happened that night. But Julian, Theo,and Laura were the ones to help her navigate the emotional strain of that evening, and they would know the reality of what really happened that night because she was a woman turned down a rich man with on a power trip. To everyone else, Rinda would be seen as unable to handle herself in a situation. She overreacted to a simple misunderstanding. She must have done something to upset that man. She wore a skirt and invited him into her classroom when no one else was there. She sat next to him. She flirted. She encouraged him. And then changed her mind. Like a typical tease. Bitch. She resorted to violence over a simple miscommunication. He’s a married man. Respected in the community. How could anyone trust her with their children? And he was a rich man with power who sometimes donated to the school. Rinda most likely would have to apologize. Best case scenario. The reality was that Rinda most likely lost her job and the safety reform suffered a crushing blow because of her. Even if she were allowed to stay, she would lose all respect from the families, and that attitude would affect the children and how they interacted with her in the classroom. Then she’d lose her job that way. Because she wasn’t able to do her job effectively. Because she was a woman who pissed off a man. . . . . . The night dragged on forever with the police report and statements. Rinda had to call a neighbor to take care of Henry for the rest of the night—feed him and keep him safe—because she had to stay late with something that was school-related. It was true, even though it was a lie of omission. Bastien stayed to deal with the last of the legal issues and some other work matters. He also moved Rinda’s desk back to its original spot and set her squish ball back in its place, where it was easy for her to grab and throw against the wall. He hoped that would make Rinda’s morning a little better. Julian and Theo took Rinda home, and Laura came over too. And once she had Henry safely tucked in his own bed they drank. And commiserated. And cried. . . . . . Rinda didn’t know Bastien was indebted to Queen Riley because of his involvement with the Tariq scandal. She didn’t know that it only took a phone call from Bastien to explain to Queen Riley what happened and why. That Queen Riley was personally involved in speaking to the man and ensuring that the entire incident was taken care of. That what he did to Rinda, he would never do to her—or another person—ever again. Not if he expected to retain his citizenship as a Cordonian. Julian, Theo, Laura, and Rinda never understood how she got so fucking lucky. Why he chose not to press charges. Why she wasn’t fired. Why she never had to see that man ever again. But Bastien knew. He saw what Rinda went through that night. He talked with her, when she was finally ready and trusted him enough. He listened to her explain her feelings about the situation, not just the facts. Then Bastien better understood. He better understood what he did to Riley that night, and he better understood the mantle of responsibility that came with the power of simply being a man.

[maryam0220]

Life Drawing Week 12

This is my final quick gesture drawing, I am so confident with my lines and I am able to draw these in a relax mode than before. I still have some points that I need to improve but I'm surprised that I can understand where I need to practice more to get more perfect figure. For the last week, I tried to challenged on some difficult poses but focused on not messing up a body structure such as a backbone position.

For the final tonal portrait, I chose Loomis illustration. I knew my biggest weak point was shadow and creating a dimension on a face so I really wanted to challenge myself to draw in this form. There were some struggles on shading and hair, but I really enjoyed drawing this piece and I am happy how it turned out. I think the proportion of the head and shading around the face looks good and followed on what I chose to draw but again, I am happy with what I came up with.

This week is the final week of the life drawing course, I am so happy that I am now able to draw a quick gesture so easy compare to the first day I join this class. Drawing was just one of my hobby and I never thought of improving my skills but after I finish this course, I am so proud of my self that I chose this elective and so happy that my hobby just got skilled up by every week of practices. I was not able to join some of the classes because of the vaccine, but the slides and the video really helped me even I was not able to attend the class. Huge thank you to my tutor Jess, I am so glad that I chose this course, love to see my improvements and your advice really helped me and I wish I could do this course offline so bad. If I have a chance to see you again, I will love to show you some of my art work that I will be creating in near future! Thank you so much, Jess!

[pauperpedia]

Tuesday Brewsday 30: Rakdos Cult 101

It’s not often Pauper gets a card that screams BUILD AROUND ME. However, when I first saw the card First Day of Class and folks from discord and reddit pointed out that it works with persist creatures, I got hyped. No longer do you need to rely on green for Ivy Lane Denizen if you want to play a sacrifice deck with combo potential. SteelOsprei, MrMeatzombie, and myself from the same discord immediately began throwing some deck ideas around. We ultimately came to the untested realization that you could build a deck with three different ideas in mind based around Putrid Goblin & First Day of Class. You could channel your inner Caleb Gannon, famous combo deck and storm brewer, and build a glass “Gannon” version that could potentially win on turn 1 or 2. You could build a combination aggro-combo deck, but being 2 colors makes that difficult to pull off. The last option, which I like the best, is you could go more in on the potentially grindy value plan. There is even a Rakdos version of goblins being brewed out there being dubbed Moggwarts (be sure to keep your eyes open for that one). Although that deck looked tempting, I thought it was best to write about my original plan. Without further ado, here’s my carnarium!

MAINBOARD:

4 First Day of Class

4 Carrion Feeder

2 Skirk Prospector

1 Lampad of Death's Vigil

1 Thoughtpicker Witch

4 Putrid Goblin

2 Rendclaw Trow

4 Mogg War Marshal

2 Crypt Rats

1 Goblin Matron

1 Flamewave Invoker

4 Merchant of the Vale

2 Night’s Whisper

3 Unearth

2 Reaping the Graves

4 Chainer's Edict

4 Sulfurous Mire

10 Swamp

2 Witch's Cottage

2 Rakdos Carnarium

2 Mountain

SIDEBOARD:

3 Pest Summoning

2 Mesmeric Fiend

4 Red Elemental Blast

4 Trespasser's Curse

2 Flaring Pain

First Day of Class will become pauper legal once Strixhaven comes out. This card, which can be cast at Instant speed for one generic & one red source of mana, gives will creatures that enter the battlefield a +1/+1 counter and haste until the end of the turn. It also has the Learn mechanic which lets you grab a lesson from your sideboard and put it into your hand. Thanks to our persist creatures Putrid Goblin and Rendclaw Trow, we could take advantage of unlimited triggers. So what do we do with these unlimited triggers? Carrion Feeder can get unlimited +1/+1 counters, or Skirk Prospector can create unlimited amounts of red mana if we sac Putrid Goblin to it. With unlimited red mana you can use endless activations from Thoughtpicker Witch, Lampad of Death’s Vigil, Flamewave Invoker, or Merchant of the Vale to churn through your deck. I still don’t know if I prefer Thoughtpicker Witch or Lampad of Death’s Vigil, or maybe I just want more Flamewave Invokers. I would love to see and hear your thoughts about this one.

The one glaring pitfall with the deck is First Day of Class can only be used efficiently on your “combo” turn. I can see the problem where you have a hard time finding pieces for the combo in the face of removal and then get your FDoC countered when you finally have the creatures. This is why I went for more of a resilient grindy deck that can combo off out of nowhere if given enough time.

So the key for this deck to work is how often you can recur your creatures. The deck hinges on Unearth being able to bring a combo piece back to the battlefield so that it can go off, but sometimes just getting a huge Carrion Feeder early on can be enough. The deck is running 3 Unearth since it’s never a dead card thanks to its cycling ability, 1 Reaping the Graves to bring everything back and start over, and two Witch’s Cottage. Since I wanted to play Crypt Rats as an answer to go wide decks or as a finisher, I needed to play a lot of swamps which makes perfect sense to run Witch’s Cottage. It can be reused thanks to Rakdos Carnarium as well. Having this much creature recursion can help you win in the face of abundant creature removal. Sometime you just need to be patient and play the deck like a true combo deck, and sometimes you just need to apply as much pressure as you can.

Goblin Matron is a great value tutor and could possibly even deserve more spots in the deck. Most of the time it will grab a combo piece like Skirk Prospector, Putrid Goblin, or Flamewave Invoker and help you set up for a combo turn. It’s also Unearthable so don’t be afraid to discard it to Merchant of the Vale’s adventure mode in Haggle and gain value in a later turn.

Since I decided to run Merchant of the Vale over Faithless Looting purely for the upside of churning through the deck with unlimited mana to try and find a finisher, the deck needed some form of actual card draw. I could have gone with Village Rites, after all I’m running the appropriate creatures for it, but I wanted something I could always use in case I don’t have the right creature(s) out. Night’s Whisper will remain my card draw of choice, but if Village Rites is more your style, then I think that is perfectly acceptable as well.

One thing I hate losing to is Hexproof. That’s why you see the deck is running four copies of Chainer’s Edict. Alternatively you could run snow lands and play Skred since the deck is already utilizing Sulfurous Mire, or you could run Cast Down. However I don’t like leaving things up to being a race, which is what I foresee the Hexproof matchup being The combination having a playset of Chainer’s Edict & some Crypt Rats can help improve that matchup.

The sideboard is a work in progress for now, I’m still keeping an eye on what Strixhaven will grant us in the form of lessons. Till then I’m taking advantage of the Learn mechanic from First Day of Class. I’ve devoted 3 slots in the sideboard to grabbing a lesson, maybe even just 2 is the correct amount, but grabbing Pest Summoning from FDoC is perfectly acceptable. With Pest Summoning you put two 1/1 black and green pest tokens that gain you life when they die. Sounds like perfect sacrifice fodder to me.

Trespasser’s Curse is the deck’s tech against anything trying to do the same in the mirror, Elves, Flicker decks that are continually looping creatures, and go wide decks. The mirror will be an interesting matchup for sure and might just come down to who has the biggest Carrion Feeder or the most Curses on the battlefield. That sounds horrible actually, nonetheless it’s an important sideboard card to have in my opinion.

Mesmeric Fiend is this deck’s Castigate in creature form. I like Mesmeric Fiend in conjunction with sac outlets because it lets you permanently exile the card you ripped from your opponent’s hand, so long as you sacrificed Mesmeric Fiend with the ability trigger on the stack. Mesmeric Fiend can be brought back with all of our recursion made available to us which hopefully poses a constant pain for the opponent.

The more typical sideboard choices can be found here as well like Nihil Spellbomb and Red Elemental Blast. REB is there for anything running Counterspell or relying on blue cards resolving or staying around on the battlefield. Nihil Spellbomb can be brought in against a variety of decks like Cycling, TortEx, Exhume, Fog, Boros Bully, or the mirror.

It’s not often the Rakdos gather it’s cultist for lessons, but when they do you better believe it’s something about sacrificing the members for the greater good. So murder away and use those endless Putrid Goblin triggers to create some mayhem. I do hope you have enjoyed these blogs/articles. I’m always open to feedback and simply want to provide the best content I can. I’m always open to collaborate on a deck as well. Please visit and like/follow me at http://facebook.com/pauperpedia a fan page dedicated to bringing you links to daily articles, videos, and podcast from other content creators covering Pauper. You can also email me at Pauperpedia@gmail.com if you have deck submissions you want me to cover as well. Till next time folks, have a happy Brewsday!

[blschaos3000-blog]

Its 10:46 pm warm/dark/birthday

Welcome to “8 Questions With……” Its been quite a week to say the least for the cheetah and myself. First we got to share the new teaser for “Kill Mode” and just when things couldn’t get more exciting,we landed this interview with Irish film director Aislinn Clarke whose debut film “The Devil’s Doorway” made our “Best of the Year“list last year where it landed in 8th. Aislinn’s film has been winning awards for the film and for its director all over the world and she has been invited to present and speak on her film as well. Watching her on FB as she catches one plane after another speaks to the power of her vision and insight into some of the horrors that Ireland has suffered at the hands of the Catholic Church from the not so distant past. Aislinn is the first female writer-director to make a film in Northern Ireland which is no easy task,I can assure you. Aislinn has both her BA and Master’s in film and while “The Devil’s Doorway” is her debut film,she has filmed a dark tale called “Childer” that the cheetah and I will be reviewing shortly. This interview represents a huge step forward for me and I’m very grateful that Aislinn agreed to chat with us. I mentioned how hard it was her to make her film in Northern Ireland,a year later and many awards later including several”Best Director” awards,Aislinn still hasn’t even been interviewed in her own home town. Well,their loss is everyone else’s gain as far as I’m concerned. So let’s get to it and enter through the Devil’s Doorway to Aislinn Clarke her 8 Questions…….

  Please introduce yourself and share a little of your background.

I’m Aislinn Clarke, a writer-director from Ireland. I’m a film-maker, a theatre director. I’ve made stuff for radio and I’m a lecturer at Queen’s University, Belfast. If it’s a form of story-telling, I’ve done it and I’ll probably do it again.

How did you begin your journey into becoming a director?

My career in film-making began in childhood. My dad loved gadgets and bought a camcorder very early on. We went to visit a local castle one day and I talked him into filming me dangling from a ledge over a huge drop. It was all forced perspective and trick photography and I was perfectly safe, but we were able to bring it home and scare the life out of my mum. I was standing right beside of her, but there was part of her still terrified that something would happen to her baby.

Coming from my background – a girl from a working-class family from the Irish border during the Troubles – it didn’t look there was any chance of me going on to make films and there wasn’t much support, but I didn’t want to do anything else.

What three people influenced you the most professionally?

After seeing her films at university, the Irish experimental film maker, Vivian Dick, inspired my early work – they were self-contained, solitary, chance-based works. At that time, I was also deeply influenced by one of my tutors, Sam Rohdie, whose analysis of film, of composition, and of performance, opened up film for me considerably. However, the biggest influence on my film-making was my father, Johnny Clarke, who died during pre-production on The Devil’s Doorway and to whom the film is dedicated. All this people taught me something about the integrity of film and of the art you’re making, but my dad said it best: “Tell the truth and shame the Devil.” However you’re approaching your work – whether it’s film or my dad’s job as a breadman – you’ve got to come at it with truth and honesty.

What was your first film and what was the experience like for you?

My first films were made when I was a student. They were small, experimental pieces, shot on super 8 film, treated with dye, food colouring, and whatever else I could use to create strange effects. The film had to go to Luxembourg in order to be processed, so it would be weeks before I saw the result of my work. It was all very solitary, heavy focused, which I loved, but, in lots of ways, it is completely different to my experience of making a feature film.

Have you always been a writer and how does one write a screenplay? Was it hard to mix real life horror with movie horror?

I have always been a writer. My first poem was published when I was 18 and then I never wrote another one. I tended to flit from one form to another, but the screenplay is where I feel most at home. I’m a dreamer – I dream up a lot of ideas – and I find the screenplay format is ideal for capturing dreams: it threads together the images, the feelings, and atmosphere that comprise a dream, but structure it into a story. That’s how I approach writing stories: I take my original idea, theme, feeling, or atmosphere, test it against the opposite idea or feeling and find a way to resolve those two things.

Mixing real life horror with movie horror shouldn’t be a challenge. Movie horror has to have some sense of the real to be effective, it merely heightens it, refines it: Tell the truth and shame the Devil.

What inspired you to draw upon the Magdelene laundries for “The Devil’s Doorway”? What was filming at an actual laundry like and how did the setting affect your writing of the story?

The producer of the film approached me with a paragraph idea of about a film set in an abandoned laundry that he wanted to make. However, the Magdelene laundries were an eerie presence in my life and the lives of most women in Ireland for a long time. I had done research on an unproduced documentary, speaking with lots of people who had experienced the laundries first-hand or had family there. I had personal connections myself. A friend of my mother’s had been put in a laundry when she was 13 and my father used to deliver bread to the local laundry – he hated it there! When I was 17, I had my son, the year after the last laundry closed, so I felt very close to these women and wanted to make a film that spoke to the horrific experience of women in Ireland. I went back to the producer telling I wanted to make the film, but it should be in a functioning laundry, in the heyday of those institutions – the 1960s – and we should point the finger of blame at the right people.

We didn’t actually film in a laundry, although a few such buildings still exist. We filmed in a former linen mill, linen being Belfast’s primary industry during its brief window of prosperity. However, the conditions that the millgirls – the millies, as they’re known – worked through weren’t particularly humane either.

Did you meet any resistance from the Catholic Church about the subject matter?

Not really. The church in Ireland knows what it has done. Its powerful grip has loosened and I think they try not to draw much attention to such controversy. That’s how they’ve avoided ever issuing a meaningful apology – let alone reparations – to the many people whose lives were ruined by the laundries, by the borstals, by deforming operations, and sexual abuse in Ireland.

You became part of history by being the first Irish woman to direct a horror feature film –What are you feelings and emotions knowing this? Have you always love horror?

I’m the first woman in Northern Ireland to direct a horror film, certainly, and I wrote it as well. On the island of Ireland – which comprises Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland – a handful of horror films have been directed by women. Certainly not many. And I am lucky that mine seems to have received a lot of international attention and success. There is a tendency to focus too much on firsts and not on follow-ups, so my main feeling around this is my determination to keep going and to encourage more female film-makers and horror film-making in both parts of Ireland.

I think a huge part of “The Devil’s Doorway” effectiveness was in its casting,how did you go about in getting your cast?

Northern Ireland is a small place with a small acting community. I was familiar with most of the cast from my work in the theatre – either I had worked with them or my husband had. Through a combination of personal connection, casting agents, and emails out of the blue, we got our cast. I think it was their wide range of experience in film and theatre that made their performances so effective. We spent a week in rehearsals and they were able bring visceral, dramatic life to the characters. There was a great sense of camaraderie, we were making an important film that give a metaphorical reality to the horrors these women experienced.

10. You have expressed frustration with how some “critics” who didn’t understand your story and just attacked it instead. Why do you feel there is a disconnect between film directors and critics? 

Artists and critics approach the work from completely different positions. The artist begins with an idea that they shape into a complete form, but the finished work always falls short of the idea. The critic begins with the complete article, then tries to work back to the idea. There will always be a distant between them. They are taking part in two different conversations. There is no point in an artist reading the reviews, but there is a tendency among some online commentators to make sure the creator knows their opinion. They will tag the creator in their take, but their take isn’t helpful to the creator, because the film is already made, and the commentators are imagining making film-making decisions under ideal artistic conditions, rather than the actual conditions of film-making.

I agree that some commentators came to the film from an odd perspective. Some felt that the reference to the Satanic offered the Church an excuse, rather than being a blunt accusation directed at the Church, while others – rightly – felt that there was a feminist bias in the film, while not seeing that their gut rejection of that comprised a bias of their own. That said, the vast majority of viewers and commentators have been very enthusiastic and have been able to appreciate the historical nature of the film, the political message, and the artistic decisions.

What was it like working with IFC Midnight in getting “Doorway” released? How did they get involved?

IFC Midnight came onboard very soon after the film was finished, at around the same time that we agreed to have the World Premier at the Seattle International Film Festival. IFC were a pleasure to work with. They care about horror films and they care about the film-makers and they were so important in terms of the films visibility in the US.

(This is Moose,we had to include him)

What is next for you, Aislinn?

The film industry is a dynamic business and it is hard to know when the money in fall in place for the next project. I have several things in development, all of which I’m very excited about: a post-apocalyptic horror about depression; a black magick battle between neighbours; a Irish folk horror; and a TV thriller. However, which will be next is all a matter of timing and the darkside of the industry.

  What three films scared you the most growing up?

I saw The Exorcist when I was seven – being a Catholic, it felt very real at the time. I saw Nightmare on Elm Street not long after and it had a lasting impact, especially the bodybag scene. However, nothing there, I think, was quite as terrifying as the Wheelers in Return to Oz.

The cheetah and I are flying in to Belfast to enjoy a Guiness with you and watch your latest movie but we are a day early and you’re our tour guide,where are we going and seeing?

  I’m very lucky to live on Ireland’s ragged and Gothic north coast – you might recognise some of it from Game of Thrones. If we were so fortunate as to get one of our rare sunny days, I would take you and the cheetah along the Victorian-built Coast Road, stopping along the way at Islandmagee, site of the last witch trial in Ireland; the Druid’s Altar; the dramatic Tor Head; the Dark Hedges; the mermaid’s cave below Dunluce Castle and the remains of Dunseverick Castle; the abandoned manor house at Cairndhu and the eccentric house of the hermit artist, Newton Penpraze, at Ballintoy harbour called Bendhu; the Marconi history and the puffins on Rathlin Island; the Giant’s Causeway is there.If you want to see that as we speed past it toward Mussenden Temple, the occult folly of the mad Earl Bishop of Londonderry. It should only take us a few hours and then we can stop of at the Bushmills distillery, if the cheetah drinks.

I like to not only thank Aislinn for taking the time off her VERY busy schedule to chat with me but also making a movie that everyone should see in “The Devil’s Doorway”. I am sure that Aislinn will continue to be a pioneer and inspiration for other women to rise up and start their own films,be it a horror tale,family drama or wherever their vision takes them. Because of Aislinn,the path has been laid out for future filmmakers and storytellers to follow.

Aislinn is active on her growing InstaGram page. You can also follow her on Twitter. See what Aislinn is doing next via her IMDb page.

Thank you as always for supporting my blog and the cheetah and I welcome all comments and feedback.

8 Questions with…………..film director Aislinn Clarke Its 10:46 pm warm/dark/birthday Welcome to "8 Questions With......" Its been quite a week to say the least for the cheetah and myself.

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Mark’s i Tunes Teaching Top 10 and the Ones That Got Away

 The first couple of terms are potentially overwhelming for trainee teachers. Because our SCITT students are approaching their dreaded first formal lesson observation, I trawled through my i tunes library (wife and daughter had control of the TV and I couldn’t cope with the high-brow Just Tattoo of Us)  to see if it offered any inspiration regarding the key things to prioritise. It did, and I’m delighted to report that this inspiration came from some of my favourite artists:

1.     Weather With You- Crowded House

The classroom is your space, so set the climate. The climate I refer to is one of high expectations. Most pupils are desperate to meet the expectations of their teacher, so set these expectations high.

2.     Show You the Way to Go – Jacksons

The Jacksons’ only number one? Surely not. They went to the effort of visiting every kind of disco on a night in Frisco and still couldn’t get Blame it on the Boogie to the top spot? Outrageous. Anyway, the reference is to “show”. If you want pupils to learn a skill, show them the way to do it, then show them different ways to do it. Show them how to write, to read, to talk, to think, to love learning.

3.     Talk – Coldplay

If they can’t say it, they can’t write it. Plan talk activities to develop the comprehension skills and rich vocabulary  pupils need for reading and writing. Make sure they listen well so they don’t miss out on all the words they could learn.

4.     Enjoy the Silence- Depeche Mode

Once high-quality talk is part and parcel of every day, set protocols for different types of activity. Take a look at my talk dial on www.mcmlearning.co.uk . 26 years in the classroom have taught me that having worked on words together, practised skills in groups, discussed ideas and possibilities, young minds need quietness to write well. Try playing background music and be hard on “idle-chatter” – this is a habit which will limit their achievements in the long run.

5.     With a Little Help from my Friends – The Beatles

I’m not sure “getting high with a little help from my friends” will go down well with the Safeguarding Governor but “getting by with a little help with our friends” surely will. You can’t be everywhere, so teach pupils to work productively and learn from each other in pairs and groups. Teach them how to question well; teach them strategies that enable them to work things out if they’re not sure; have resources on display and on tables which support independent learning.

6.     Born of Frustration – James

Poor behaviour is probably born of frustration and a lack of confidence. It becomes a cloak beneath which pupils cower when insecurities about reading, writing or Maths surface. Your first port of call should be to teaching and learning: could the lessons be better differentiated, more challenging or more engaging, and if they could, how would behaviour improve? Something that the data we are so obsessed by doesn’t report, is that not all kids have been lucky enough to have had the same opportunities in life. Level the playing field and make sure everyone gets opportunities to broaden their horizon – especially the “naughty” ones.

7.     Road to Nowhere – Talking Heads

Grammar worksheets; somebody else’s old planning on the shared area; mediocre texts; whole-class spelling tests (I know someone who does  good spelling training 😊). These are all a road to nowhere -  so don’t use them.

8.     Think for Yourself – The Beatles

There’s a lot of content to cover and sometimes this means that opportunities to think get squeezed out. Teach thinking. Assess thinking. Plan thinking. Visit www.thinkingschoolsinternational.com for ideas and resources and let me know if you’d like to join the network.

9.     Happiness- Ken Dodd

Teaching is tough. Most people have no idea how tough or the type of challenges teachers face. The parents can be the biggest challenge. Don’t let them get you down. You deserve to be happy at work. So, don’t waste time with the “mood Hoover” in the corner of the staffroom; don’t neglect your social life; invest in team-building - because teaching is a team game. Make your classroom a happy place: fill it with laughter and music. Golden time shouldn’t be “anything that keeps them quiet” or just “Go on the computer” (that’s the last thing they need more of) – get the pupils into the fresh air, get them playing board games, get them making, drawing, painting and baking. When you’re a school leader – and this will be sooner than you realise – make your school a happy place to work. Occasionally, I work in schools which feel unhappy and I reflect that it’s little wonder that they can’t recruit or retain a stable staff team.  

10.  There is a Light That Never Goes Out -The Smiths

I bumped into a former pupil in Camden. She and I were sometimes at loggerheads during the 3 years she was in my tutor group. I could have taken the easy route and tolerated her lateness, disruptive behaviour, no academic progress, abusive language. After all, there were nights when she slept rough on the concrete beside the water tank in the top floor of her tower block. One morning, she dragged herself to school after her drunken father had punished her by dangling her, headfirst, out of their 11th floor window.  I think she needed the stability of the school day, its structure and rules - and teachers who wouldn’t take the easy route. She completed school, got some GCSEs and, on that day in Camden, she thanked and hugged me. There is a light that never goes out.

The Ones that got away

Sit Down – James

If only James had called this  Sit Down (Shut Up and Get on with Your Work). But that would be inappropriate, immature and not funny. So it has no place in my blog.

Accidents Will Happen – Elvis Costello

They will. Have a bucket, gloves and a facemask at the ready. And watch out for hungover staff the morning after a staff party.

Where Will the Children Play? – Cat Stevens

Cat’s political comment on the selling off of our school playing fields. Vote Green Party.

Schools Out For Summer – Alice Cooper

The summer holiday is for planning and preparation, Alice. And that’s not even your real name.

Slippery When Wet – Bon Jovi

Jon Bon Jovi’s poignant reminder of the dangers of a wet playground. Stay safe. Stay inside.

If you are lucky enough to share my music taste (How could you resist Ken Dodd?), the playlist can be downloaded at https://itunes.apple.com/gb/playlist/teaching-tips-top-10/idpl.u-PDb40JgT7jrLL