#lesbianferrissbueller

[ihni]

bilys the sex shop owner cause hes wild like that and steves the landscaper cause he has a good aesthetic sense OR steves the sex shop owner cause he had to scramble to find a way to support himself when his parents disowned him for being bi and billys the landscaper cause hes Stronk and whatever

I can't decide which one I like best! They're both so good!!

Either way, ai just want awkward first neighborhood meeting or something between these two. (And then, like, a year later when they hang out in the landscaping break room for lunch, and whoever owns the sex shop brought a bunch of ... items ... to pack for shipping because they're behind schedule and need to send these off today, and whoever owns the landscaping business helps, probably badly, because they want the other to have time for lunch).

[cockasinthebird]

hi i just read your tags on the arm wrestling thing and???? please?? write that???? please i need it i might actually start crying rn but i am hungover so lets blame it on that ily

Hiiii! Before you even sent this ask I was thinking about it hahahahaha, aaaaand I hope this is satisfactory work!

Tagging @thinger-strang because they seemed quite interested as well~

Hope you feel better soon bby, ily2!!! Drink plenty of water!

-

Hand in hand, elbows firm on the dining table, gazes locked unblinkingly so, they’re connected tightly this late afternoon.

It was a usual Saturday at first - the gang was in the middle of their intense DnD session; a hobby they decided to move to the Harrington mansion because here there’s no parents to interrupt and, frankly, better snacks.

A decision paired well with how Billy has been helping Steve out with his tower of homework once a week for the last half a year or so, and Max is elated because it means she doesn’t need to get a dorky bike when she can just hitch a ride with her step-brother.

Billy and Steve were, metaphorically, elbow deep in English literature, homework on Edgar Allan Poe and the “romantic era” of poetry, which to Billy isn’t exactly something he wants to study so closely with the one guy he can’t ever stop thinking about; can’t ever have.

So when the little brats shouts for them, interrupting whatever Steve was asking about, gesturing with those hands, hair smelling so fucking good of expensive shampoo- what is that? Lavender?

The six of them trot into the dining room, Max looking horribly exasperated, arms crossed and rolling her eyes as Will and Dustin fight about something way too loudly.

“Hey!” Billy shouts but they don’t stop. “Hey!” Louder this time and it visibly shakes poor Will. “What is it?” 

“Well, we were on our way to fight this dragon, ordered by lord-” Mike starts explaining but stops promptly as Billy raises his hand up.

“The short version, we’re kinda in the middle of something here.” Billy gestures to the incomprehensible mess of papers and books in front of him and Steve, who looks relieved at the chance of a break.

“So we’re in a tavern” Mike tries again, but-

“This better be quick, Wheeler, or you’ll have to explain to your mom how your bike got bent.”

“Billy,” Max groans with a hard stare, after all, he had agreed to be nice.

Both to her and to Steve.

“We need you guys to arm wrestle!” Mike spits out and looks between the vastly stronger, older guys.

And at that Billy can’t help but grin all crooked with exposed teeth. See that’s something he can get behind; a chance to show off and prove he’s still the King, even if he and Steve have found something akin to friendship after their truce.

“Well why didn’t you just say so,” Billy almost chuckles. He places an arm across the back of Steve’s chair and turns to look at him. “What’d you say, princess?”

Steve looks more than a bit intimidated, eyeing Billy’s arms, chest, grin, and then Dustin and the rest. “What’s at stake?”

“Oh, we’re at this tavern, and Max and Lucas have each bet on these two strong orcs sitting and doing an arm wrestle in the middle of a roaring crowd, and we need you guys to decide who wins! For it to be fair,” Dustin says, shockingly without any interruption from Billy, and smiles oh so wide that Steve even asked.

“Okay, sure,” Steve doesn’t sound very convincing, but he shakes his head and stands up to walk to the other side of the table.

“But it’s not fair!” Max shakes her head. “Billy is clearly going to win, so how do we decide which of the two orcs he is?”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” Steve’s voice a slight bit shaky, perhaps because everyone knows he’ll lose, even himself.

Billy just sticks out his tongue at him and rumbles forth a chuckle. Oh he is going to destroy Steve, no doubt about it. He’s been looking at those arms, fought him before even, and while he’s not the worst fighter Billy’s been up against, he’s far from the best.

“How about I say the names and they decide which one they’ll be? That way they don’t know who bet on who, and you guys won’t have a say in it?” Will asks as he settles into the chair next to Steve, ready to judge the show of strength.

“Genius!” Lucas proclaims and sits down on the other side of Steve.

Max simply scoffs and goes to stand next to Billy.

“We have Urzok the Infernal, and Dhakk the Mighty,” Will offers up and looks between Steve and Billy,

“I’ll take Dhakk the Mighty,” Billy drawls out and wags his tongue at Steve, whose Adam’s apple bobs visibly as he swallows hard.

“Guess I’m Ur… Urok?”

“Urzok,” Will says with a far too serious tone, as if it actually matters.

And their hands clasp together atop the sea of notes. Strong, firm, warm, soft. Does Steve use lotion on his hands? Billy teasingly squeezes the other’s hand a bit tighter for a short moment, a little signal of “You’re going down, pretty boy.”

But for some reason that Billy isn’t too keen on exploring, Steve squeezes back, and his heart does a dangerous flip that nearly causes his cocky grin to falter. Does he know what he’s doing to Billy? Is he aware of the stupid effect this causes?

“Are you ready?”

“I’m ready,” Steve says with sudden confidence, as if he fucking knows.

“Yeah, ready.” Billy counts it as a victory that he doesn’t stutter those two simple words.

He’s starting to sweat, actually, and prays that Steve doesn’t notice it - that his hand doesn’t turn clammy and gross. The first time he touches Steve’s hand and he’s going to ruin it by being sweaty and sticky.

“1… 2…”

Somehow it’s the slowest countdown he’s ever listened to.

“3… Go!”

And Billy’s entire arm tenses up immediately. Steve’s pushing against him, grasp tight and desperate, is this all he got? Billy’s not even moving yet, rock steady although he can feel that Steve could probably win with enough determination, the way his arm is starting to go in the wrong direction.

So he pushes back a bit, just enough so that Steve knows, arms going in the right direction this time, further and further in favor of Billy.

The kids are shouting and screaming their names- well, the orc names, but Billy doesn’t really register their words or who’s cheering for who. He’s gazing straight into those eyes where he drowns in honey, staring back beneath a tense brow.

Steve’s smiling somewhat, it’s hard to tell from the way his lips are pulled tight, but Billy has watched Harrington enough to know his expressions.

And as Steve’s arm starts to shake ever so slightly - not visibly so, but felt in their grasp - Billy’s not even halfway through his energy reserve, and honestly he’d hoped for a bit more of a challenge, but…

He eases up, just enough for it to be believable as Steve starts pulling him in the other direction. Even so, Billy is not about to go down easy. Halfway to his loss and he’s still holding strong, Steve’s exhaustion more apparent now yet he smiles lighter, forehead less wrinkled, some gleams in his eyes.

The back of Billy’s hand meets the table softly, and everyone but Max jumps up ecstatically, clapping and shaking Steve by the shoulders as he won.

Steve’s got both his hands in the air now, leaving Billy to feel weirdly lonely, but he won’t dwell on that.

“Yeah!” Steve hollers victoriously, pumping his fists so full of vigor. “And the crowd goes wild!” He cups his mouth like a megaphone and mimics a cheering crowd as best as he can.

Dustin and Lucas jump around him, shouting all sorts of nonsense that isn’t meant to be understood past their excitement, yet Max’s scoff manages to be heard above their celebration, and she stomps back into the living room with El and Mike in tow.

“Change that to Urzok the Champion!” Steve shouts just as elated as the kids and points to Will, who’s almost beaming at the way those three makes a scene.

Unfortunately, Billy hadn’t really given the side effects of victory any thought, and seeing how happy Steve is to have won stirs something in him.

“Harrington! Harrington! Harrington!” Steve, Dustin and Lucas all chant like they’re at a football game, all deep and gruff. “Harrington! Harrington! Harrington!”

There’s a pang of heart and a souring of his gut. Billy knows that he let Steve win. There’s no need to feel threatened or jealous or whatever. Kinda angry, kinda entertained. Kinda sick-ish.

“You really thought you had me there for a moment, huh Billy?” Steve points to where Billy remains seated, smiling but not with full honesty. “Thought you could defeat the King!”

Okay that does it. “Come on pretty boy, one more time, just for fun,” there’s restraint at the edge of his tone, and his smile twitches with something mean. He pats the table and offers up his hand again.

But Steve throws his head back as he laughs in a mocking tone, friendly enough, although far too boastful.

“Nah, I won-” He presses a finger against his chest, then points to Billy. “-And you lost!” 

The way Steve smiles so wide actually hurts in a way, and it is shocking how something so small and meaningless can wound Billy’s pride.

“And you can never-” Steve slams both hands onto the table. “-Ever-” He leans in close enough for Billy to feel him breathe out, “-Take that away from me.”

There’s a far too familiar desire to reach out, to touch skin, to meet the source of those words. Billy’s only seconds away from either punching Steve or kissing him, he can’t really tell, but his entire being is ready to act.

Steve doesn’t linger there though, pulls away and lifts up his arms, flexes his biceps and tips his head down to plant a kiss on each, really showing off just how strong he is, boasting about being the victor.

“Guys come on!” Mike shouts from inside the living room, clearly very impatient.

“Yeah yeah we’re coming!” Dustin replies at the same volume and sets off.

“Thanks,” Will speaks low, or maybe it just sounds like it from the way the others assaulted Billy’s eardrums with their shrieking.

And soon enough they’re all alone again.

Billy slumps against his chair, playing with a pencil that will soon break under the tension of his unresolved feelings.

Steve puts his hands on his hips, chest heaving as he tries to calm down again, looking just as flushed and worn out as he does after basket. He huffs a laugh and shakes his head, then returns to his seat right next to Billy, who’s smiling something so sly.

“You… you let me win, didn’t you?” Steve asks all breathless and runs a hand through his hair. His exhaustion comes more from the wild gloating than the actual wrestling they did.

“All I can say is…” Billy leaves a pause that is a clear indication of a yes as he eyes Steve up and down. “Congrats on the win, Urzok the Champion.”

[theficpusher]

Love Is In The Chippy by savannah_blue | G | 901 Harry likes to take his pet chicken Geraldine to the local chippy for lunch. When Harry runs into a handsome stranger one day at the chippy, Geraldine plays matchmaker. Written from the chicken's POV. Obviously.

Fish & Chips by BlackSlytherin | G | 1868 "The first thing he noticed was a big bright brown boot landing on the ground, and then there was a big bright guy following it. Bright as in he was flamboyant and suddenly he felt like screaming along all these girls because oh god that man was gorgeous, and Louis couldn't help but stare." Louis works at a Fish & Chips shop and Harry Styles is filming his Gucci ad.

the chicken can stay (but you've gotta go) by brokenstereotype | nr | 3337 Louis wonders who on earth wakes up at nine in the morning and craves fish and then wonders who on earth brings a chicken into a fish and chips restaurant. AKA because of that Gucci shoot.

No Harm, No Fowl by rainbowslovehl | G | 6381 “He’s here again,” Louis hissed at Niall, his co-worker who was scraping chips into a paper tray and on top of the fish. The guy passing by was distracting but according to Niall, he wasn’t an unusual sight for him. But he could indulge Louis, at least. “He’s just walked past the shop for the second time, probably on his second lap of the neighbourhood. What do you think he wants? What does it mean?” “He’s looking for his lost farm?” Niall supplied before sniggering at his own joke, handing over the order. “Don’t make that face and just stop obsessing over him. He’s just a guy.” Louis finds himself obsessed with figuring out why Harry roams around the neighbourhood in a blue robe. Featuring Geraldine the hen, bad bird puns and too much ketchup.

Let The Boys All Sing And The Boys All Shout For Tomorrow by Lunarrua | M | 18429 It's February 1988. Thatcher is in power. There's a new drug sweeping through the clubbing scene. In Manchester, it's the eve of a major protest and a new musical movement. And when Nick finds Harry looking lost outside his favourite chip shop, it's the start of a weekend that will leave an indelible mark on both their lives.

Fool For You by flowercrownfemme, lesbianferrissbueller | nr | 46622 “It’s not a game.” Harry scoffed, trying to push past him once more but Louis held his ground. “And I’ve never once told you a lie.” “All you do is lie," Harry argued. "Jests and tricks and made up stories, that’s your trade. I’d never trust a word from your mouth.” “I tell stories,” Louis conceded, “but a good one must be based on truth. And my stories tend to get a bit more truthful when I’m around you, Princess.” In which Harry is a brooding prince who's scarcely smiled since the death of his mother and Louis is the dashing jester hired to change that.

[keroujack]

me again. look up the lyrics to Choking on Flowers by Fox Academy i dare u <3

Inside your car We never have to drive too far I like the freckles on your arm Not eat with you, I'd rather starve

okay uh huh yeah sO all i can see is steve with a hopeless crush on billy (which he thinks is unrequited even though it’s definiteLY requited) and steve’s doing that thing where he’s looking over at billy from the passenger seat and falling deeper and deeper in love with every little thing ab billy, all the silly things, like his freckles and the way he holds the steering wheel and the way he tips his head back when he laughs, and thinking about how, even if he’ll never be able to have billy the way he wants, he’s happy to have him at all and you’re lucky that i’m not allowed to get on a plane and kick your ass because if i COULD i WOULD for making me THINK ABOUT THIS

[prettyboyporter]

TRACY XDHGFJHGKJKLK:L day seven first kiss im screaming i literally am working on a sleeping beauty au RN can i PLEASE save ur limerick to my pin board aaaaaaaaaaaaaa

YES BBY ABSOLUTELY YOU CAN, !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

[nblesbianbenhanscom]

not liking susan is valid as hell. you never have to forgive a bystanding adult- billy and max are children on the show. susan is a fucking adult lmao

you are correct. it’s just complicated cause i know how like abuse works, and it’s just all a big mess. but you’re absolutely correct.

thank you.

[greyspilot]

what do u think of neve campbell in scream as like. a pretty damn good ref for fem!steve

okay so like first reaction is AKJDHASKJHDKJSAHDK GALAXY BRAIN!!!!!!!!!

if we’re talking purely looks then yes, some things are super obvious like those pretty brown eyes, nice mouth, the sassy eye roll, the eyelashes and ofc THE HAIR!!!! they also have some traits in common like they’re 100% selfless survivors and i love them both so much okay.

but if we’re talking like personality i don’t see it just bc i think sidney is a bit like, timid ?? at the beginning of scream 1. scream 3-4 i defs see some more similarities to like late season 2/season 3 steve but now i think i’m just convoluting my scream au and your actual question. so.

yes, neve campbell in scream as stevie is something i need fanart of asap pls <3

[flippyspoon]

one week came on at work. thought of u

IsummonfishtothedishathoughIliketheChaletSwissIlikethesushicauseit'snevertouchedafryingpan!

[catharrington]

i didn't even realize i wasn't following u cause i always see ur stuff but i cant BELIVE I WASN'T cause your tags are my absolute favorite !! hope ur having a good day <3

Oh my gosh? hello! Can you excuse me for a sec tho? Goes to my backyard and screams into the trees

I’m just kidding lol. Thank you so much tho!! It’s so funny I try and stay chill by putting my rants in the tags and they still get spotted lol. I mean I love it!! I love that you love it!!! And gosh your an amazing content creator thanks so much for following me🥺🖤🖤🖤

[stevebillyrecs]

The World’s Most Ridiculous New Year’s Resolution by lesbianferrissbueller ( @lesbianferrissbueller )

T | 2.2k words

“Ok," Robin rubbed her temples. "But you wanna go on a hunt for some random guy you hooked up with at a New Year’s party, just because the dick was so good?” “Yes.” Robin let her head drop against the cafe table. “I’m too hungover for this.” “It’s New Year’s, Robin. Please?" Steve pleaded. "I would do this for you.” Robin thought about it, chewing at her bottom lip. “I guess you've never really been this committed before.” “We had a connection it was mind-blowing-” “Ok, stop telling me about how good the sex was, and I’ll help you find this mystery guy.” “Deal.” “So what’s his name?’ “I don’t know.” “Jesus fuck, Steve."

[witchsickness]

im literally such a huge fan of the poetry u rb with harringrove specific tags like YEAH you're fucking spot on every time. vibe master. like damn

hi im so glad u think so my mind’s literally an empty room with one of these little rubber balls inside and every time i read a piece of poetry it sends that thing bouncing up and down and all over like themthemthemthemth-

ANYWAY what im sayin is i’m super glad ur out there enjoying my brain going haywire 💖

[ihni]

heart buns, skull cake, or ghost cookies!

Ghost cookies are already decided! I have the cookies, just have to make the ganache and decorations for those. Heart buns ... Yeah I DO kinda want a softer kind of cookie/cake too, so heart buns are definitely an option. One can make red buns, right? Right. Hmm. Can’t be too difficult ... Maybe put some red jam or something on them ...

Skull cake is ... I WANT to, but also I need a really NICE recepie for it because the THING is the shape. I want it to taste extraordinary too, if I make one.

[pxisonoak]

for the blog summary thing: 10/10 aesthetics so you get completely blindsided by the memes

EXACTLY what i am going for!!! 🙏🏼🙏🏼

[avalonlights]

dude youre like so amazing i hope u have an easier go of it starting soon <3

Aaahhh so are you, thank you!! Much appreciated!! ;__; <3 <3 <3

[keroujack]

"Got a problem with me? Kiss me on the lips dude" #harringrove#steve @billy#he says it with a sigh that billy leans forward and catches on his tongue#the way he reaches up to hold billy’s face feels like a question#but the way he kisses back tastes like an answer" -- im gonna kill you jillian. youre gonna wake up dead

i’d like to see u try

[prettyboyporter]

dude my brain is an asshole too in a MAJOR way. trust me when i say you do n o t suck. youre legit and lowkey so shhhhhh but youre actually one of my favorite people in this function <3

AHHHH THANK YOU BABE *MASSIVE HUGS*. Coming from someone as amazing s you that really means a lot! I’m feeling super weird and dumb tonight lol so this helps <3