notable moments from The Homecoming Job
leverage 1.02
Dr. LeRoque: Pardon me, Mr. uh?
Nate: Oh, uh, Nathan Ford. You’re Dr. LeRoque?
Dr. LeRoque: Can I talk to you outside?
Perry: Doc, he’s cool, I found him on the internet.
Dr. LeRoque: Yes, that never goes badly. (to Nate) With me.
Nate: Uh… I’ll be in touch.
(Perry hands him the flash drive and Nate follows the doctor out of the room)
okay but big mood “I found him on the Internet” “that never goes badly”
but also,,, bruh we NEED to know how their clients found them,,, like ??? H O W
- - - - -
Dr. LeRoque: You can’t just come in here and get his hopes up!
Nate: I’m just here to provide options.
Dr. LeRoque: There are no options.
Nate: The Veteran’s hospital …
Dr. LeRoque: Is 400 miles away and has a five month waiting list. Everybody in that rehab room is a reservist. When reservists get out they get sent home no matter where home is or how far it is from the treatment they need. Nobody thought this through. We’re not a rich hospital, I cashed in every favor I had to take care of these kids for as long as I could but I have to go back in there and tell Perry we can’t treat him anymore. I have to do that. Run your scam on somebody with money.
Nate: It’s not a scam. I’m here to help.
Dr. LeRoque: People don’t just show up to help. That’s not the way the world works.
leverage really called out the us government’s negligence and neglect for veterans in episode TWO and we stan them so hard for it
leverage said “go big or go home” from the VERY beginning
- - - - -
[Audition Room]
Sophie: Why? Why? I can’t live like this anymore. With the lies and the filth. No. Help me. I want to be clean. I want to be clean.
(two directors watching are overwhelmed by just how awful Sophie is)
Rogers: Yeah, you understand this is a soap commercial, right?
Sophie: Uh huh. When I thought about Peggy I came up with this idea that the dirt was really this giant metaphor, for sin.
(Sophie’s cell rings, she glances at her purse)
Rogers: You should take that. No, no you should take that.
Sophie: Oh. (answers phone) Hello? When? (hangs up) Peggy killed her first husband.
Rogers: Thank you
I literally scream every time I LOVE SOPHIE S O MUCH WHAT THE FUCK
- - - - -
[Parking Lot]
(one man is laying on the hood of a car and another falls on top of him. Eliot turns away from the car as the last man pulls a gun on him. They stare at each other for a moment, then a phone rings)
Eliot: That you or me?
(man seems unsure as the phone continues to ring)
Eliot: Could be important. Does your mama have your number?
(man looks down and Eliot grabs the gun, punching the man in the neck. The man goes down, choking. Eliot unloads the gun and tosses it away before pulling out his phone and answering it)
Eliot: Yeah? Nothing, why?
“nothing”? I’m-
- - - - -
(guard walks by a painting hanging in a museum gallery. He looks away for a moment, and when he looks back a rope is dangling where the painting had been. A cell phone rings)
Parker: Parker. Shh. No, I wasn’t shushing you.
I love her, your honor
- - - - -
(Parker, Eliot and Sophie come around the corner and head down the hall)
Parker: From the first job?
Eliot: Yeah.
Parker: I put all that money in a Swiss bank account.
Eliot: Millions of dollars and you didn’t buy anything?
Parker: I don’t like stuff, I like money.
Sophie: I bought a little retirement home, an island.
Eliot: Nice.
Sophie: In Dubai. And Tokyo.
Parker: What about you?
(they reach the door which has a small envelope with Sophie’s name written on it. Sophie takes it off the door and opens it)
Eliot: Yeah, I’m not about to tell two known thieves what I did with a multi-million dollar payout.
Sophie: Don’t you trust us?
(Eliot doesn’t answer.)
- - - - -
Hardison: This is our new cover story. Welcome to Leverage Consulting and Associates, founded in 1913 by the great Harland Leverage the Third.
(Hardison points to a painting on the wall of an older man that greatly resembles Nate)
Sophie: I’m sorry. Nate is going to kill you.
Eliot: Did you paint that?
Hardison: I’m gifted.
Eliot: That’s weird
HARLAND LEVERAGE THE THIRD
- - - - -
Hardison: Now Leverage Consulting Inc. is squeaky clean, all corporate taxes on record as being paid for the last ninety years. (He gives them each a cell and a folder) All your identities as partners, your payroll taxes are paid, you guys have pension plans and dental, those are employment records, case files and company newsletters.
(the group walks the halls of the Leverage offices as they discuss the files)
Parker: In 1998 I won the sack race at the 4th of July picnic. Cool.
Hardison: Now these, these are your offices. Now you can bring something like a photo, you know what, a plant! I’m a big supporter of dandelions.
hardison goes hardcore when coming up with backstories
- - - - -
(Hardison opens doors to a conference room that holds a long table with many chairs around it. One wall is dedicated to large TV screens)
Sophie: Nice.
Eliot: My man.
Hardison: Long version or the short version?
Sophie: Short.
Eliot: Short version.
Parker: Shortest.
(Hardison hits a remote the TV screens illustrate his explanation)
Hardison: Photo and video forensics programs, back doors into every electronic banking system in the world, running heuristic data crawls all over the news sites to find our clients, oh also!
Parker: This is the short version?
Hardison: Facial recognition database tied into CIA, NSA and the FBI. But, the real pièce de résistance (changes screens to sports games) DirectTV HD Total Sports Package. NFL, NBA and I threw in a little bit of hockey ‘cause I know you people like that.
Eliot: Hockey.
hardison nests SO HARD
like, bring in all the highest tech into your cozy new office you designed for you and your fellow adopted criminals? heck yeah
- - - - -
Nate: Our client is the cameraman. Corporal Robert Perry. He says that the Castleman contractors spooked and started firing.
Eliot: 5.56 NATO rounds mixed in with some 9 mils from the sub-machine guns. Insurgents would have used AK-47s with 7.62 ammo. It has more of a... (hits the back of his hand to his palm) crack. Contractors shot 'em up all right.
Parker: You ID’d the weapon from the gunshot sound?
Eliot: It has a very distinctive sound
D I S T I N C T I V E
- - - - -
Nate: Yes, and lobbyists in every office in Washington, DC. The problem with a cover-up is all the paperwork it takes to keep the lies straight.
Hardison: Internal emails, memos.
Nate: Exactly.
- - - - -
[Roof]
[Hardison and Parker are wearing black and connected to repelling gear)
Hardison: I gotta go back to the office I just remembered something.
Parker (adjusting Hardison’s harness): What?
Hardison: I just remembered gravity and the squishiness of all my manly bits.
Parker: I designed this rig myself. The line is carbon fiber. Five point harness. Weight support here, here, and here. Auto-breaking resistance on the main pulley back here.
Hardison: Okay cool, so it’s tested?
Parker: Not yet.
Hardison: Not yet? When the hell was you gonna test it?
(Parker pushes Hardison off the roof. She smiles, he screams)
Parker: Big baby.
(she jumps after him. Hardison screams until he stops upside down. Parker lowers herself to his side)
Hardison: Seriously? Seriously
hardison’s first time rappelling decidedly Did Not Go Well
- - - - -
Sophie: My company’s focused on meeting senators, but I’m thinking congressmen.
DuFort: You know the great thing about congressmen? Fifty, a hundred grand well spent will get one elected, but then once they’re in the incumbency rate is over 95 percent so you can get an average 18, 20 years’ use out of one of them. In these uncertain times buying a United States congressman is one of the best investments a corporation can make.
[DuFort’s Office]
Hardison: Oh I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. I’m a professional criminal and I find that disturbing
they’re going at america’s THROAT in this one and I love it. thank you john rogers
- - - - -
(while DuFort is distracted Sophie pulls out his wallet and removes the RFID card with her teeth. DuFort takes off his coat to look at the stain)
I am but a simple gay and this was Hot™
- - - - -
the phones hardison gave the team have six main buttons: internet, text, files, to-do, id scan, and mail
- - - - -
Nate: Parker, what’s the status of the voicelock?
[DuFort’s Office]
Parker: Uh, I’ve been sampling DuFort’s speech but I still need a few more sounds.
[Private Party]
Nate: How many?
[DuFort’s Office]
Parker: Well I only need the sounds puh, tuh, oo, ah, eh, oh, ah, ke, a, ef.
[Private Party]
Nate: Ah, only those. Eliot.
(Eliot walks by carrying two trays of appetizers)
Eliot: I’m on it. Pardon. (approaches Sophie and DuFort) Hello.
Sophie: Ooh. Mmm.
Eliot: (to DuFort) Appetizer, sir?
DuFort: Sure, what do you got?
Eliot: I’ve got the pâté d’escargot avec bière d'Argentine and (looks at second tray and grimaces) what looks like old duck, kind of greasy.
DuFort: I guess I’ll have the first one.
Eliot: Of course.
(Eliot offers him the second tray and Dufort looks at him expectantly)
DuFort: Well? May I have some?
Eliot: The greasy duck?
Sophie: Oh, no, no, no, I wouldn’t have the greasy duck.
Eliot: No I wouldn’t suggest it.
DuFort: No, the other one.
(Eliot pretends confusion)
DuFort: The the pâté d’escargot with the bière d'Argentine!
Eliot: Excellent choice sir (gives DuFort the first tray).
DuFort: (takes food) Who is this clown?
[DuFort’s Office]
Parker: Pretty good. Got most of them. Okay, now all I need is ef, uh and kuh.
[Private Party]
(DuFort spits out the appetizer he has taken)
DuFort: This is shrimp!
Eliot: Very good then. (walks away)
DuFort: It’s shrimp you stupid F----!
[DuFort’s Office]
Parker: Oh, there they are. Really loud too
parker being so competent and knowledgeable about voice activation codes? amazing. iconic.
and the whole scene with eliot and the food? hilarious.
also there already another meta post about this but this scene shows just how SMART eliot is,,, like coming up with that on spot??? don’t get me wrong, hardison is “the smartest man [any of them know]” but damn
- - - - -
continuing list of non-weapon objects eliot uses as weapons:
an IV stand
+ bonus
nate: the defibrillator/AED
- - - - -
Perry: Mr. Ford!
(Perry pushes a defibrillator towards Nate, who grabs the paddles. The first man runs toward Eliot with a knife, but Eliot grabs his arm and pushes him toward Nate)
Nate: Hello.
(Nate hits the man in the chest with the defibrillator paddles and he flies backward, unconscious)
eliot looking Impressed™ at nate for that
- - - - -
Eliot: Play time’s over Nate, it’s only a matter of time before they come after us. The tall one, the way he used a knife, ex-Marine, probably Force Recon.
Hardison: You ID’d a guy off his knife-fighting style?
Eliot: It’s a very distinctive style.
two distinctives in one episode
- - - - -
Hardison: I didn’t sign up for any of this. What I did before, nobody got hurt.
Sophie: I stole paintings for a living.
Parker: I never hurt anybody.
Eliot: I actually hurt people, so…
LMFAO eliot but also- notice that sophie never said that she never hurt people, she just said she stole paintings for a living
- - - - -
Sophie: Nate, if anything had happened to this kid--
Nate: You know you guys called on me. You remember? You begged me to run the crew, agreed to play by my rules. Now walk out if you have a problem with that. Walk out any day if you have a problem with that. It’s simple.
(everyone looks hesitant)
Eliot: We finish this one.
Parker: Just one
PSH like any of y’all believe that
- - - - -
Hardison: How do we hit ‘em?
Sophie: Congressman Jenkins, he’s our in. Looked me straight in the eye and told me he’d never even heard of the shooting.
Parker: So?
Sophie: Looked me in the eye? When men are telling me the truth they’re not looking me in the eye. A man only ever looks a woman in the eye when he’s making the effort to lie to her.
Eliot: ...Well you can’t argue with that.
Hardison: Noted and filed
LMFAO
- - - - -
Nate: All right, Jenkins is DuFort’s pet congressman, let’s see if we can get him to bite. The best way to get two people to reveal a secret, get ‘em to turn on each other.
- - - - -
Sophie: You should look out for the signs congressman. Missed phone calls, no more little favors.
Jenkins: Those are the same signs that your wife is cheating on you.
Sophie: That’s right.
Jenkins: What am I supposed to do when that happens?
Sophie (hands him her card): Play the field
- - - - -
Hardison: Congressman Jenkins is very careful. No direct bribes but he’s renovating his house and so far he’s received over $600,000 worth of work for a little over fifty grand.
(Hardison brings up pictures of Jenkins’ house on the screens)
Eliot: Castleman owns the contracting company, huh?
Hardison: I mean, he’s going through like three shell companies but yeah. And this man loves his house. Just check out his web browsing habits.
(Hardison changes the image to a website for wood panels)
Hardison: Look here, see the man spent three weeks picking out the perfect mahogany wood panels. This site is like wood porn.
Eliot: Is his house finished?
Hardison: Not even close.
Eliot: Can I borrow your phone?
Hardison takes out his phone, dials for Eliot and hands it to him.
Eliot (on phone): Hello? Yes, I’d like to cancel delivery on some mahogany wood paneling. Please.
(Hardison tries to help, Eliot walks away)
Eliot: The Jenkins house. Yeah, you know what, do me a favor man, just go ahead and cancel the whole order. Yes sir.
(Eliot leaves the room as Nate enters with a bowl of popcorn and two beers)
Nate: What’s he doing?
Hardison: Yanking the congressman’s chain
I love chaotic (pre)boyfriends
plus at one point it high hey looked like they were holding hands
and eliot’s SMILE at hardison ,,, you soft man, you never stood a chance
- - - - -
Hardison: A woo--whoa, whoa! A wood-- a wooden box?
Nate: A wooden box.
Hardison: Wood? Well, we can put a man on the moon but all our laws go into a wooden box.
- - - - -
Hardison: I mean, break a law, everybody’s done that, my mama’s done that but steal a law. Oh, she’s gonna be a legend baby.
(on screen, C-SPAN news shows the Senate floor where Parker is walking to “The Hopper”. She waves at the camera and puts the fake bill into box.
Parker: The eagle has landed.
Nate: It’s in!
Hardison: Uhn! Go ahead girl! Sexyness! Unh. Rrrnnn.
Nate: Might want to ease up on that a little bit.
Hardison: Just saying.
Nate: Yeah.
Hardison: Between me and you. Between me and you.
Nate: Never leaves the room.
adorable “the eagle has landed” parker + already-gone-for-her hardison ,,, I love it here
- - - - -
(also, again I am reminded that there is a 250 text block limit so imma have to make a part two and apparently this is my life now)
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tell me about hardison. please please tell me about hardison. i am asking i do v much want to know what you think
did i make this gifset as an escapism from studying? no. no, of course not.
ANYWAYS. since i already a lil post with some writing about my favourite parts of hardison's character, i thought i'd make a gifset of my top 10 favourite ✨alec hardison✨ moments, in order.
10) 2.08 – it's moments like these that make me remember hardison was the one pulling this reluctant family closer together, and none of them know how to behave now that they're part of a family.
9) 2.05 – this grift in general is just hilarious, as well as the episode. aldis hodge is just great at delivering these kind of comic relief/serious lines.
8) 1.02 – he sets the tone! he is literally the glue – after nate. he is the mission statement. he's just a young sociable guy who's really good with computers, looking to use his skills, and then he finds them, and it's oh, i can steal from people, hang out with these weird, talented people, AND be on the moral high ground?
7) 3.04 – now there are lots of fun moments in this episode, but i like him here, just doing the impossible trying to keep the 'rottweiler' from biting all of his friends.
6) 3.04 – need i say anything? (but i will nonetheless.) i mean, he's just breathtaking here, hypnotism aside. it was one of the times that made me wonder what else is in hardison's past? violin is one of the harder instruments to learn and he just ended up being crazy good at it at 14 (iirc)? literally king shit.
5) 4.10 – he is a problem solver, he is a lover, he is a decent hummer. i just love how into it he gets. the way he loves parker is one of my favourite things about him. just before i started watching leverage i was like "god, are there any good het relationships on tv", and then i just saw hardison with his joy at everything parker did and his understanding when she couldn't quite voice what she wanted yet. a being of love and nerdiness, he is!
4) 4.07 – i swear there is cocaine in the season 4. this episode was everything. but this scene? the quiet but overwhelming fear? him working to help the team find him as much as he can? every time i watch this scene i can't look away. "i don't want to be alone again." sir you are literally driving me insane.
3) 5.09 – now this is obviously one of THEE episodes of the series, the ot3 episode. i also love love love how they went full ham on showing off hardison's skills (which i wrote about here), but i LOVE an unhealthy amount how they showed his fear, and therefore his bravery. eliot and parker work through stressors fairly efficient, but hardison's fear is overwhelming, and alone, he couldn't temper it. this moment for his character was so important because after years of doing the hard job so that other people can have some security, he believes he has reached the limits of his skills. we're nearing the end of the season and we're seeing the most intense version of his fear.
2) 4.01 – i would rank this episode in my top 5 of the whole series, but that's for another day. his dramatic moment is funny (and i think that's its main intention) but it's also touching. i mean, he's just tapping at his computers not sure if his best friends' are okay, if the job is going to work, and then he hears their voices again, and you can see the weight come off of him. another show of his strength!
1) 3.07 – if i could describe to you how much this scene makes me laugh. hardison complains so much and his whole monologue is makes me scream (humorously). it's number one just for the pure hysterics of it. (for the reader's peace of mind, i am black.) from a wide view of the show, i just like how, with hardison's character, he's a black guy, not a Black Guy. it's not his personality, but it is his experience. it's not the main act, but it is an undercurrent. obviously leverage is not the type of show to make nuanced statements on race, but i think moments like this are just it! yes we live in a fucked world. yes it sucks. yes write about it and make the stories we tell an escape of that fact and a re-rendering of that fact.
alrighty, that's all folks. tl;dr alec hardison is the king of found family, a genius, and a very talented complainer <3
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Out of Commission
Fandom: Debris (TV)
Notes: Fill for “79. Staying by their side when they've been hospitalized.” From this list by @emswritingprompts Set after 1.13. Spoilers/references for 1.01, 1.02, 1.06, and 1.13.
“I’m not leaving.” Bryan spoke softly, but there was ice in his tone. “She’s my partner.”
“I understand that, sir, but—“
“Bryan!”
Beneventi tore his gaze away from the orderly he had been speaking with and turned his head toward the sound of Maddox’s voice.
He saw his supervisor hurrying toward him through the half-empty hospital corridor, and Bryan raised a hand in greeting.
“Got your message,” Maddox huffed. “How are you? How’s Finola?”
“She’s been checked out. We’re okay.” He had leveled his gaze back to the orderly, daring him to contradict him. The younger man gulped.
A half-smile appeared on Maddox’s face as he read the situation. “Can I speak to your supervisor?” he asked, clapping a hand on the orderly’s shoulder and steering him away from Bryan.
Once they were gone, the CIA agent stepped back into his partner’s room and closed the door behind him.
“Maddox is here,” he reported, reversing the chair next to her bed to sit straddled across it.
Finola was awake and sitting up in bed in a white cotton hospital gown. She nodded. “I heard him. And, you, threatening that poor orderly.”
Bryan raised his hands. “I didn’t say anything that was a direct threat.”
“You don’t have to stay, especially now that Maddox is here. One of us should be out there, looking for INFLUX, for my—for George.”
He only lowered his arms to rest them on the back of the chair and continued to sit watching her, and she sighed, knowing he wouldn’t leave without her. It surprised her a little, this sudden display of…protectiveness from Bryan.
“What happened to ‘this job is about being alone?’” she mumbled, looking down at the oxygen monitor clipped to her finger.
He cracked a smile. “I met someone,” he began. “She wanted to know all about me.”
“That is not what I said!” she objected, feeling heat flood her face even as she raised her head in a challenging gesture.
“I know.” His voice had become soft again. “But you said we had to work together. I’m just waiting until you’re ready to get back into the field.”
“Do you think…we will? You think Maddox will still put us together?”
“He will. If he doesn’t, he won’t get the information we have.”
Finola had to smile at his scheming. “You want to trade what we know to stay partners?”
“It’s the only leverage we have.”
She shifted uneasily in her bed as another thought struck her. “And what if…Maddox decides to force answers out of us?”
Bryan rubbed a hand across his face, his eyes drawn to the darkening, finger-shaped bruises along her throat that had been left by INfLUX. “I won’t let it get that far. So, yeah, we might be split up.”
She nodded again. The disturbing possibility she had raised made her glad of Bryan’s company, so she took his hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. She didn’t know how much time they had left to be alone together.
“Thanks for being here,” she whispered, just before a knock sounded on the door.
Bryan only had time to nod, just once, before the door opened, and Maddox entered, ready to hear what they had to tell him.
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