#like I love the soundtrack but I listen while driving so I'm not about to tumblr post about that

[siriuslysmoking]

Swim

Part 4 of Meddle About

Series Masterlist

A/N: Never been on a private plane or been on a sailing boat or been to the bahamas, this is all coming out of my ass. I did however watch a youtube video on how to sail so I'm basically an expert. Much love <3. I recommend listening to Mamma Mia soundtrack once they get on the boat.

Pairing: Fem!college student x sugar daddy!steve

Warnings: fem!reader, she/her pronouns, alcohol consumption, age gap (R:21, S:29), Reader fawning over Steve every moment she can, I don't think I missed anything, Not edited because I don't want to.

Word Count: 2k

Summary: Working and being a student is tough, you never seem to have a moment to yourself, so when one of you co-workers needs a shift and offers to take your saturday night double, you take it. Finally going out with your friends you encounter a strange man with a strange proposition.

-The water's getting colder, let me in your ocean, swim Out in California, I'll be forward stroking, swim So hard to ignore ya, 'specially when I'm smoking, swim World is on my shoulders, keep your body open, swim-

Steve picks you up at nine in the morning two months later. He walks up to your door and refuses for you to carry your own luggage down the stairs. He opens the doors for you and only lets you carry your book bag. The drive only takes thirty minutes to the airport.

"Mr. Harington, this way."

Neither of you go through customs likes you should, you don't get your bags checked like you normally would've.

Both you and Steve are guided by an employee to a side door onto the tarmac, to a much smaller plane than the other big airlines. You eye the side of Steve's face.

Once you step onto the plane is when you realize this is a private plane. You need to stop forgetting how rich Steve Harrington actually is.

The plane ride is full of smiles and Steve explaining the plans for the week. "I booked a nice dinner for us tonight and we can go to the beach after, do you like the beach? I didn't ask."

"I do." You laugh at the panic in his eyes, "No the whole sand thing, but I love the ocean."

"good, good." He nods, "I've never done this before."

"Never been on a plane?"

"No, never been on vacation."

"You're joking?" You look at him in shock.

"Not unless you count work trips."

"You are a ridiculous man." You laugh, looking at him, "If I had the luxury I wouldn't stop traveling."

"I never really had the need to. I'm what some might say, a workaholic."

"You don't say?" You look at him sarcastically, he just lets out a low chuckle. "Then we will have to make this your best vacation ever."

"Only vacation-"

"But best." You point out.

When you arrive at the house, it's the most beautiful thing you've seen. It's a white house with light blue shutters, right on the beach, with a pool, and surf boards.

Steve and you take a walk through the house, the kitchen is huge with a view of the ocean, there's two bedrooms and three baths.

The bedrooms were big with golden mirrors and balconies.

You and Steve unpack in your respective rooms across the hall. You throw your windows open, letting in the fresh air. "Hey, we have dinner in a couple hours, if you wanna get dressed now, we can go walk around town."

"That sounds good." You smile, he nods and closes your door behind him, letting you get ready in private. You throw on a white long sundress that has buttons going all the way down your front so that you can leave the bottom open for your legs. You put on some strappy white heels to match and throw on your favorite jewelry.

Putting on some light makeup while you spray a floral smelling perfume all around you. You access yourself in the mirror while you put your hair up in a clip.

Steve knocks on your door while you put some finishing touches on your hair, "Can I come in."

"Yep!" You look away from the mirror, looking to him.

well damn. He's wearing a simple white button up and black slacks. He's got sunglasses placed on the top of his head and he looks good.

"Wow, sweetheart, you look beautiful."

"So do you." You smile back at him.

"Ready to go?" He holds a hand out.

"Yeah." You grab your bag and take his hand as he leads you down the stairs and into the car he rented for the week.

His hand stays firmly on your knee as he drives downtown. You stare at the beautiful sight- the outside of the car and inside.

You arrive in no time and of course Steve rounds the car to get your door, "Thank you for coming here with me. Doing this."

"Hey, I got a free vacation, I would never turn that down." You joke, he laughs along as he grabs the door to the restaurant.

You two get settled at a table on the patio. Both of you glance at your menu, discussing what you should get.

"You know, I've never asked the simple questions." Steve looks up from his menu.

"Then ask."

"favorite animal?"

"Elephants."

"Why?"

"They are a lot like humans, they mourn their dead like we do, burying them in dirt, trying to stuff their wounds with herbs, and even stay by their dead for days after they die."

"Woah, I didn't know that."

"What about you?" You put your elbows on the table, leaning forward

"Dogs."

"Why?"

"They're cute?" He scrunches his face.

"That's valid." You laugh.

The next day Steve wakes you up to breakfast on the porch of the house. After eating his pancakes you might have gotten down on one knee right there. You thought about going down on both knees when you saw him in his pajamas, simple gray sweatpants and a black t-shirt.

He explains your plans for the day, he rented out a boat for the day.

A new thing you learned about Steve, He has a Sailing License.

You go upstairs to get dressed for the day and throw on your bikini and a sundress that also counts as a swimsuit coverup. You slip on your sandals and grab your bag. You meet Steve downstairs where he's packing a bag of sunscreen and towels. He goes quiet as he looks up at you, he takes a moment to study you and you suddenly wonder if you should be wearing something else, then he breaks your thoughts by smiling wide and softly saying, "Ready?"

You nod, following him out of the door.

You didn't know much about boats but when you got there it looked like something right out of Mamma Mia.

"This beauty is called a Picchiotti Classic Bermuda Ketch."

"You know that means absolutely nothing to me, right?"

"Just wanted to impress you with my big words."

You watched as Steve tied all the ropes and raised the sail. While he was working you applied sunscreen and watched as reached for different things, his shirt lifting and-

You need to stop. You think to yourself.

Once you're on the water you rid yourself of your dress and lay down in the sun, pulling out a book.

"Having fun?" You hear Steve ask.

"Living my Mamma Mia dream." You sigh, basking in the sun.

"Mamma Mia?" He glances at you.

"Yeah, the movie, they used all ABBA songs."

"I know what ABBA is, but what's Mamma Mia?"

"No." You look at him in disbelief, propping yourself on your elbows, "Oh my god, you're serious!"

"I'm sorry?" He looks at you with a confused expression.

"You should be!" You laugh, "We're watching it when we get back."

"Alright then." He agrees with a smile.

"Tell me when you get hungry, I've got a surprise for you."

"This isn't when you kill me and dump me into the ocean, right?" You raise an eyebrow.

"Again, don't plan on killing you," He smiles then it suddenly drops, "Yet."

"Killed by a rich man on his boat." You raise your hands as if it was on a billboard, "Sounds like a good way to go."

"At least you have standards." He laughs, sitting next to you. "What are you reading?"

"Wouldn't you like to know."

"Yeah, I would." He snatches the book out of your hands, before reading the back, He sits in silence as his eyes glance over the page. He looks at you while you give him a smirk.

"You sure?"

"I see you have high standards in other categories as well."

"Wouldn't you like to know." You repeat yourself with a sly smile, stealing your book back. "I'll let you read it when I'm done."

"Can't wait." He sends you a wink and stands up, turning and asking, "Drink?"

"Yes please." You smile up at him. He comes back with two Margaritas in hand, "Thank you."

"Of course." He sits and you've noticed he's taken his shirt off. You try your hardest to keep your eyes on the pages of your book but you can't help but let them wander.

Twenty minutes later Steve comes out with plates and lays them on a picnic blanket, "I asked Mia what your favorite food was and she was very specific."

You almost melt when you see him lay out all of your favorite food. "Steve."

"Yes-," He pauses, his face almost panicked, "Wait did she mess with me?"

"No, no." You stand when he sets the plates down with a sigh of relief. You engulf him in a hug, he seems shocked by it but after a moment he wraps his arms around your waist, and you whisper. "Thank you so much."

"It was nothing."

"No, it wasn't." You don't let go, hugging him tighter, "Maybe to you, but this means a lot, so accept my thanks."

"You're welcome." He whispers into your hair. He slowly lets his hands fall to your waist and you follow suit, your eyes meet and his hands settle in yours. You hold eye contact for what feels like seconds but hours at the same time. You feel your eyes falling lower from his eyes and then to his lips-

Steve clears his throat, quickly stepping away from you, he motions to the food, "Let's eat."

You stay still for a moment then quietly you sit across from him on the blanket.

A couple hours later you find yourself dipping your toes in the water, Steve's already in the water with his life jacket on.

The wind has died so the boat is steady. You are reading your book and you don't notice Steve looking at you, until you feel water on your face and book. You slowly look up, shoving your bookmark into your book. "That's foul."

Steve just smiles, "You'll forgive me."

"No." You stand. up, leaving your book on the ground, "Maybe if you hit me, but my book is next level."

You jump in the water, splashing him in the process. You feel his arms around you before you even touch the surface. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Attacking you with water."

He laughs, "You really shouldn't be in the water without a life jacket."

"But I have you to save me." You give him an innocent smile.

"Hours ago you were asking me if I was finally going to kill you, now you think I'll save you from drowning."

"What can I say," You wrap your arms around his shoulder as he holds your thighs up. "I'm a very trusting person, some may say it's a flaw-"

"I say it's your greatest strength." He says softly.

"Why, thank you kind sir."

The both of you have been waiting for the wind to pick back up, so when you feel it, the both of you take notice, "Let's get back on the boat."

He helps you over to the boat, not letting you swim on your own even though he knows you're fully capable. He lets you up the ladder first, then he follows after.

You spend the rest of the time just watching him in his element.

You make it back right before sunset and he tells you what he plans to order in. "Sushi?"

"Oh, most definitely."

After picking up dinner you and Steve settle on the couch, he clicks on Mamma Mia and you settle so that you can see all of his expressions and the screen.

By the time you've finished your meals you and Steve have moved close to each other on the couch, your legs rest over his and his hand lays over your upper calf.

Throughout the movie he makes comments such as:

"We have the same boat"

"Why does he have tattoos there?"

And

"Why is she singing to a child?"

At the end of the movie he looks at you with wide eyes, "We don't get to know who the father is?!"

"No." You laugh.

"There's DNA tests for a reason." He huffs, you almost burst out in uncontrollably laughter on how serious he is.

"She doesn't want to know, it's three times the love."

"I think it was Bill." he crosses his arms, seemingly studying the credits.

"I'm a firm Sam believer."

"No, He's a cheater, I can't get behind him." He shakes his head, still looking at the TV.

"Just wait until you watch Mamma Mia 2."

His eyes go wide as he looks to you, "There's a second one?!"

-

-

Taglist: @glamourbabe17 @eddiesguitarskills @paradise-summertime @taeteddybear @strangerparks @ali-r3n @sunmoonandstars2000 @rvllybllply2014 @crazycat-ladys-blog @the-fairy-anon @frogtape @jlovesjj @whomstdev

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[thelaurenshippen]

this month’s mixtape is a ship mix for whiskey/harry from @breakerwhiskey. they might be the slowest burn I've ever written and this soundtrack got me through!

This playlist came together pretty haphazardly at first--initially, I just had a playlist that was my dumping ground for songs that were BW-flavored but didn't belong on the main playlist. This is something I've started to do for projects in the last year or so. It started, as many things do, with creating a "DH Strays" for Desperate Hollow (the queer outlaw story I swear I will get published someday), and then grew from there. For Breaker Whiskey, the playlist is called "delta tune", a reference to the knob on a CB radio that takes you to the off-frequencies. Then I realized a real ship vibe was popping up in a lot of the songs I was choosing and decided to start building this. Why didn't I make a ship playlist to begin with? Well, to be honest, the main Breaker Whiskey playlist sort of was that. Their relationship is so central to the story and Whiskey's journey that I didn't think I needed a separate ship playlist. But, you know, I'm me, so of course I need as many playlists as possible. The thing that really kicked it over the line were the songs that felt like they were from Harry's perspective. 

So pretty soon I had a playlist that was fairly packed full of vibes. I've whittled it down considerably, and created a playlist that I think has a good flow and narrative arc. But that delta tune playlist still has some Whiskey/Harry vibes that are good, even if they didn't fit musically on the playlist: "No Children" by the Mountain Goats, "All Too Well" by Taylor Swift (Taylor's version of course), "When You've Got Trouble" by Liz Longley, "Drive Away With You"  by Jill Andrews, and "Stay" from Lempicka, which I mentioned in a newsletter a while ago - it really is the perfect song for them, but the musical theater vibe just doesn't fit. 

But let's get to the main event! This is a true 8-track mixtape. It is, I think, efficient and satisfying, packing a lot of emotion into 30 minutes of listening. 

1. "Can I Leave Me Too?" - The Greeting Committee 

If you go, can I go with you/if you leave me, can I leave me too?/I'm afraid that I might need you - I mean, this is a perfect song. This was really the song that kicked it off, because this is suuuuuuuuch a Harry song, my LORD. She's the one left behind, but she also doesn't want to fully admit she needs Whiskey and yet she also is trying to morph herself into something that will make Whiskey stay, even if that means withholding information from her. 

I'll never say your name again/if you don't want me - I love this lyric because it works on two levels for me. There's a sense of "if you don't want me I'll forsake you completely" but also a sense of "I don't deserve your name if you don't want me" but THEN, the thing that really gets me is Harry saying "I'll never say your name again if you don't want me to say it", given their whole thing with names and nicknames and the fact that Harry always called her Abigail when she preferred Abi. 

2. "Edge of the Earth" - Beaches 

Again, this song feels like it was written for them. One of them fire, one of them ice, going in circles and never moving forward? It's them.  

Like a race car driving away from the scene/does she want me to stay/does she want me to pack...You push me in circles/to the edge of the earth/where I can't go any further 'till I start coming back to you - I feel insane!! Those lyrics are just too perfect. I also love the imagery of spin me like a globe/and drop your finger on me. I used to love playing that game (but also, in retrospect, why did my parents own a globe?), and there's something about Whiskey and Harry being the ultimate determinants for each other of where they go. 

3. "In My Bones" - 76th Street

This song has just been sitting in my Apple Music for years and years waiting to be put on a playlist. It's in my "rent free" playlist, but was never in an original character or story playlist. And then it popped up on shuffle as I was building this one and it was like, "OH! Here it is!"

Even in the stillest nights you found a way to shake up my life - I love the idea that the two of them were living a pretty peaceful existence in Pennsylvania, quiet and sedate, and yet were STILL torturing each other. 

How do I feel you in my bones, even when I'm alone/the time you spend on my mind, it's like a second home/but I say that I'm doing okay/while I wait to hear a knock at my door/tell me we'll run away

4. "Too Sweet" - Hozier

A late add to this playlist, because it's still a fairly recent song, but come on. I take my whiskey neat? How could I resist. 

I also just love how this is a love song that's sort of...snarky. Like, I don't know that I totally buy that 'you're just too sweet for me!' is the takeaway of the song. To me, the lyrics really describe two very different people who are maybe trying to accommodate each other, or to be some version of themselves they think they should be, but it's not really working. 

You keep tellin' me to live right/To go to bed before the daylight/But then you wake up for the sunrise/You know you don't gotta pretend - both Whiskey and Harry do a degree of pretending around each other, but as they live together, those facades start to wear away. And then the question becomes - are the real versions of each other ones they want?

5. "Any Day Now" - Trousdale

Another great song about trying to live up to someone's expectations. Musically, this song fits here, but narratively, it is to me a very early-days-after-Whiskey-left song for Harry. This idea of "you left and I always let you down but I'm going to be FINE now" even though that's not at all true. And I looove that I know I said is sung by the lead but the accompanying I love you and I need you are sung off to the side like secrets or after thoughts. Because Harry didn't say those things and she just hoped that Whiskey would stay anyway. 

I've been sleeping too much, got a list that I have/yet to cross out, gonna get to it in a while is a perfect contrast to the lyric Since I left I've not been drinking or staying out late/Get up early and I meditate from "Runner's High" on the show playlist, which is very much a Whiskey song. 

But every time I hear your name/it's like somebody hit replay/on all the ways I let you down/I guess I'll be the villain now - I'm normal about Harry listening to all of Whiskey's transmissions and hearing herself be cast as the villain that she absolutely already thought she was. 

6. "Where It Ends" - Hunter Metts

"Ships Passing By" by the same artist is on the main playlist and initially "Threads" by him was on here (I never thought that I could lose you/So I tried/To hallucinate a love that never comes true). But then he came out with this track. 

If this is where it ends/where do I go when you know every part of me - okay, Hunter!!!! Kill us from the opening line!!!! 

Someone that you regret/on the interstate, I felt you getting colder/and I hope you're doing better ever since we were done/I hope you find forever with somebody you love, I guess/but I didn't think it'd cut like this - I think from the beginning - from the moment Whiskey hot-wired a car after killing Billings and drove her and Harry away - Harry felt like any chance she had of something with Whiskey was dead on arrival. I also love the "I guess" here because no, of course you don't really want that person you just broke up with to be happy, not really. 

7. "Everything" - MUNA

This songs makes me fully feral. MUNA is so good at writing universal experiences through laser specificity - the particular mindset of seeing something, anything, and thinking of that one person is such a real and potent thing. This song and the next are two songs that I have listened to on single repeat for quite literally an hour or so. 

Everything's about you to me is really just Whiskey's constant experience in driving around the country. 

'Cause the world could be burning/and all I'd be thinking/is how are you doing, baby? - an insane lyric!!!! Ahhhhh!

I can barely SPEAK about the bridge. I'm only here to tell you that I am eviscerated gets me EVERY time and you are a wildfire and I'm standing in the rain takes my brain completely offline. 

8. "can we start over?" - Charlotte Sands

I'm calling it now, this song is going to be in my top 5 most played songs this year. I think the last three months of this show were written to this song on repeat. And I'm going to do something I rarely do and just...copy out pretty much all the lyrics. Because it does feel like this was written purely to help me write the final act of this story. 

Can we start over?/Can we be strangers?/I could let go of all of my anger/Reintroduce you to all of my secrets/I'll never leave you, this time I'll mean it - UGH. That final line. The promises that Whiskey and Harry have made to each other, the secrets they've withheld. I just love the theme of "let's go back to the beginning, things will be different this time I PROMISE". But, of course, you never can start over, not really. 

We'd be like the movies/Be happy in the end/You wouldn't have to lose me/I wouldn't have to mend/Nothing would be painful/We'd never play pretend/Then maybe I'd be able to let you in again/Don't let me believe in you...I want to believe in you - The contrast between "don't let me believe in you" and "I want to" just kills me. That's really what it comes down to - I can't trust you again, even if you let me, even though I desperately want to. 

Maybe in a different life/Maybe at a different time/What if I was meant to be yours?/What if you were made to be mine? - the constant question. If they had stayed in their primary timeline, if they had gone into a different one, if they're able to get into a different one now, does that make things easier?

I know I've copied out almost the entire song but the lines "I could let go of all of my anger" and "this time I'll mean it" are really soooooo Whiskey. And "Can we be strangers...reintroduce you to all of my secrets?" is very Harry. I could talk about this song forever. My god. 

[a-moth-to-the-light]

Most-Listened of May 2024

[last month]

May 2024 was finals + road trip home from uni + getting settled in at home for the summer, so the songs on this month's list were the soundtrack to a really busy time for me. (Because of that, I'm extra grateful to them for helping me power through it all!) I didn't have the brainspace to be properly excited about any new releases (except Repion's at the end of the month), so a lot of the songs here kind of snuck up on me. Surprisingly, I'd still say I enjoyed May's releases more than April's, though!

1. Not Like Us -- Kendrick Lamar

The Drake-Kendrick beef finally graced my YouTube recommended at the beginning of May, just in time for "Not Like Us" to save me from the Inevitable Finals Gloom. The beat was what hooked me at first (so string instrument!! so texture!!), but there are SO MANY good lines here--more than enough to keep me excited about this song, even after I massively overplayed it in just a few days of finals. (I'm a 'leave songs on repeat for hours as I float in and out of The Work Vortex' kind of guy, you know?)

2. Candy Store -- from the 2014 Heathers soundtrack

No complicated reason here: the vocal performances are just breathtaking, so I haven't been able to get this song off my mind for the past two weeks. Shoutout to @embraceofday for introducing me to this one! (That was a couple of years ago, I think, but somehow it came back to me recently, and I've been more obsessed than ever!)

3. Anthems For A Seventeen Year-Old Girl -- yeule

I've been getting ads for I Saw the TV Glow all month, and they worked on me--sort of? I still have no plans to see the movie, but this song from the trailer has taken my listening by storm. Lyzette G on YouTube mentioned yeule last year (I am SO jealous of their taste in music), so I'm proud to say I like a yeule song now! This is peak 'driving home on the highway at night and your heart is all sparkles because she said she'll text you later', which is one of my favorite kinds of music, actually. (Yes, this is oddly specific. But it's also like A General Feeling, you know?) It's eerily inhuman but also full of longing; it keeps a consistent, hazy atmosphere while still including a few moments of emotional punch--it's great!!

4. Down Swinging -- Holly Humberstone

Saxophone solo!!!!!!! That actually isn't my favorite part of this song, though--the way Holly Humberstone sings "watch me keep my cool tonight" at the end of every chorus is full of just SO many emotions--shame, determination, acceptance, longing--I find it captivating (really, every lyric in this chorus is a gem). I love songs like this (see also: Betty Who's "You Can Cry Tomorrow" and Lee Hi's "HOLO"), songs that aren't about being over something bad but are just about being within something bad and getting by anyway. Being stuck, and knowing you're stuck, and being okay regardless? Sometimes, I just need to know that's possible, and "Down Swinging" makes it feel more real than ever.

5. I'm the Ocean -- Neil Young

My dad and I ran across this on our (twelve-hour) drive home from my university, while we were listening through this playlist. My dad is a huge Neil Young fan, while I'm just meh about him--"I'm the Ocean" caught my attention from first listen, though, and I've been revisiting it daily since then. (Funny enough, my dad doesn't care for this one.) I love its haziness, how it walks the line between hopelessness and rage and how you're never exactly sure how to feel about the speaker, or about the song itself. I love singing "I'm the ocean / I'm a giant undertow". (Like, that is a captivating lyric. So powerful, so simple yet so layered with meaning?) I love the crunchy TV-static guitar!!!

6. From Small Things (Big Things One Day Come) [Live at Malieveld...] -- Bruce Springsteen

Spotify keeps notifying me whenever Springsteen releases a new compilation album (they know me too well...)--and he just keeps releasing them. I'm not sure I needed all these albums, but I'm glad to get this gem, at least! This one has a super-singable chorus, and the fiddle solo is SUCH a high.

7. Turn it up -- PinkPantheress

Not particularly exciting, but super fun! It's a solid serotonin jam to go on a playlist with all the early Twice title tracks.

8. No Biggie -- Itzy

SO CUTE SO CUTE I LOVE IT. With "None of My Business" + this one, I've been so glad to see how well the post-NewJeans world suits Itzy. My main problem with a lot of their music, especially title tracks, is that the songs strain their vocals in ways that end up sounding unpleasant to me--a chilled-out song like this one reminds me just how listenable Itzy's music can be!

9. Rollercoaster - MTV Unplugged -- Bleachers

I think Spotify suggested this one to me. I am THE Bleachers girlie, but I'd never heard this specific version of "Rollercoaster" and oh my GOD does it make me emotional. If you've ever cried to "Someone to You" by Banners, I think you already understand what this one makes me feel.

10. The Ghost of Tom Joad (feat. Tom Morello) - Live in Anaheim, CA -- Bruce Springsteen

My #1 song from my #1 artist!! (Sorry, "Badlands". Your top spot was beautiful while it lasted, and we've had so many good times, but I just... I don't think you're the one for me anymore...) I did an essay about Springsteen for one of my finals, believe it or not, and I talked about this song in particular, so that explains the sudden spike in listens--though it's constantly in my rotation regardless.

11. Wave - Ollounder's Bold Dynamics Mix -- Ateez

It's a time-honored tradition, now: trashy club remixes are my THING during finals. This one stuck with me all month, though, because it's actually kind of compelling--I find it fun, even when I'm not speedrunning a final paper. "Wave" is just a really sweet song already, and I think this remix adds a variety of sounds that make it not just pleasant, but also super captivating.

12. Lookalike -- Conan Gray

No comment...

13. Set Me Free (Lindgren Remix) -- Twice

Re: trashy club remixes for finals. This is so trash, I can't even argue that it's worth listening to at any time other than finals season. (The synth riffs in the prechorus are kind of awesome, actually, but the vocals sound like you're listening to them through a tin can telephone.) It was a great hype song while I studied, though.

14. Maybe -- (G)I-DLE

My second-favorite G-IDLE song ever (though I have no idea how I'll make room for "Eyes Roll" and "Revenge" in an updated top ten) is never not welcome on my most-listened list, but I have no idea why this is here. Maybe I left it on repeat while working on a paper? It has the right kind of beat drop to give me the same kick of adrenaline as my trashy club remixes do--though in terms of how much I admire it, "Maybe" is on a whole different level!

15. BOA -- Megan Thee Stallion

This is a wildly addictive song. The Gwen Stefani sample is such a good hook, but it's used so sparingly that I'm left hanging on Megan's every word, waiting for it to appear again. The deep bass makes the song feel full, though--by the end, I'm left wanting more without feeling like the listening experience was actually incomplete. My favorite line is definitely the Birkenstocks one; I still smile every time I hear it! I'm so excited for the album :)

Five-Star Songs (& Albums!) This Month

BOA -- Megan Thee Stallion

Lime -- Soojin

With just a few twists on a sweet, summery formula, "Lime" manages to stand out from the pack of cheery dance songs coming out at this time of year. The orchestral intro is so exciting, and the weirdly gritty vocal production (I still have no idea why anyone would consider that on a song like this--this album has some truly baffling production choices amid all the fantastic ones) unexpectedly grew on me. This song does sweet-and-sour so well!!

[Speaking of baffling production choices: "Drop Top" from this same album is a very nice listen, but what the hell is happening in the bridge... It would totally be a five-star song for me if not for that screechy violin (?) note in the dance break. Like. Why. Why would you just repeat the same ear-piercing note. The whole time. Have you considered a riff? Or making it just a TAD BIT quieter? Or just... a lower note? Anyway. Also, the ENTIRE title track, "Mona Lisa", is a baffling production choice. Just. The whole thing.]

Not Like Us -- Kendrick Lamar

Summer Daze -- Soojin

I like "Lime" a lot more than this one, but I can't help but admire "Summer Daze" too! I'm so in love with how it's a pop b-side just feels so authentically indie-rock? Like, "Más Lejos" by Atalhos was one of my favorite songs of the summer last year, and that's an actual indie-rock song--and it feels like everyone who had a hand in "Summer Daze" understood exactly why people enjoy that type of song & decided to write a love letter to the genre. This track would fit right in with anyone's wistful k-indie playlist!

Entre todas lo arreglamos (album) -- Repion

Yeah, fuck it--I added Repion to the stanlist this month! After this EP, how could I not? The pre-release "El día no me da" had my heart already--it was so similar to their last album, though, that I found it a tad bit boring. But as an opener for a song like "Viernes", "El día no me da" reaches its full potential; it functions so perfectly that my qualms completely disappear. "El día no me da" builds up the energy to this delightful high, and then "Viernes" is the rollercoaster ride back down, full of twists and turns--I love the experimentation with rhythm, which continues in "Qué hay de ti?". It adds such a nice edge to the album; even though this release retains the things that drew me to Repion in the first place--strong vocals and incessant energy--it feels anything but boilerplate. This EP has only one flaw, and it's the kazoo-sounding thing that shows up in "Vienen de pasárselo bien". Maybe it's a perfectly lovely instrument in other contexts, but I think it just sounds silly here, and I really would rather just appreciate their (always delightful) harmonies in peace. Those harmonies do save the song for me, though! To be fair, this album only has four songs--putting it in the albums category is kind of a stretch--but these four songs are packed with enough interesting ideas to make this the fullest EP I've heard in forever. (Plus, Repion gets extra-credit points for releasing my album of the year--a full-length one, too--last year.) I'm not sure if this EP will turn out to be a smaller part of an upcoming album, but I really hope so--I love this sound for them!

[starseneyes]

Chenford - Lucy Chen / Tim Bradford - The Rookie - Season 5 - Ep 16

"Exposed" AKA "That Bradford"

Valentine's Day is pushed a week in the universe of The Rookie, but since I'm still not sure what year we're in on the show, that's just fine by me!

SPOILER ALERT: Spoilers are like sugar for me. See, some people love sugar and hate spoilers. I'm the opposite (unless it's macarons or carrot cake). So, if you're spoiler-averse, run. I'll also be spoiling everything that came before. You've been forewarned!

Ready to see how Tim and Lucy's first Valentine's as a couple pans out? Me, too! Let's dive in.

Chenford In Lucy's Bed

No music to lead us into tonight's episode. Only the sounds of the streets. Honking. Cars. Barking dogs. Crickets that have apparently gotten into Lucy's apartment only.

But, anyway, we're not listening to a jamming soundtrack. We're listening to life. It's the sounds a sleeping person might hear in the night.

That's what makes the first sound we hear so jarring. We are with Tim and Lucy in that moment, the harsh buzzing sound of a vibrating, moving phone atop a nightstand.

They've immersed us in this world with them.

And, before I get too swept away... Tim and Lucy in Lucy's bed! To be honest, my very first thought was, "How does he fit in that bed?!".

Of course it's doable, but I've never shared a bed with someone taller than me. Matthew and I are almost the same height! And he complains because I like my feet at the bottom and he likes his head at the top. Learning to share a blanket has been a feat in our marriage!

But Tim and Lucy seem to be sharing the bed well enough—except Lucy is on his side.

Look, it's her bed, so she gets first rights to choosing a side. But I still think it's hilarious they both usually sleep on that side of the bed.

The buzzing sound wakes them. And I gotta ask Lucy what kind of battery she's got in that phone, because it can't be the standard model.

Girlfriend has that phone in her hand all the time during the day, and here she doesn't even have a charge cord in it overnight. That's witchcraft!

"Who is it?" "I don't know" "Hello?" "Loca, you gotta stop texting..."

Lucy jumps up fast. It only takes a second for the wheels to start moving, and she leaps to her dresser, tugging out clothes.

And… I kinda hope a drawer or two belongs to her man. Just sayin’.

"What's happening?" "PUC I trained with distress call. He needs a covert rescue." *Tim sits up* "What are you doing?" "Backing you up."

There's no hesitation in this man, and I can I hear her "thank you" in her look. These two are a team. And while he knows she can handle herself, they both know it's better to have backup.

Lucy's Driving Tim's Ride

Alright, I gotta laugh a little, because my first thought I wrote on this scene (no joke) is, "All about putting Tim in small places today." Seriously. We've taken possibly the tallest member of the cast and put him into all the tiny places and it's cracking me up.

Now that we've gotten that out of the way. Can. We. Talk. About. Lucy!?!

She rolls up into this situation completely in characters, already deep in her backstory and ready to help her friend out of a jam. It's great to get to see her use her UC chops, again.

"Damn You came in hot. Damn." "All clear."

Lucy makes it clear she's not alone. That's a good thing.

Also, I saw a lot of people over on the Twitterverse commenting on him calling her "hot", but this might be a language barrier since this is a turn of phrase. It usually has to do with coming in "guns blazing" or in an otherwise crazy manner.

He's not calling her hot. Well... not yet.

"I'm impressed you managed to scrounge up a backup this fast." "Yeah, I mean, it helps he was sleeping in my bed." "Oh. Oh, you're that Bradford."

Excuse me!? That Bradford?! As in... she talked about Tim!?

"Curious to hear what that means." "No."

I want to know, too! Was Lucy talking about Tim at UC when she was still dating Chris? What was being said that finding out he was in her bed made it all make sense?

Like, hearing "Bradford" didn't click it. It was that he was in her bed.

Did she not talk about Chris at all because she was at UC School and didn't feel the need to fill everyone in on the boyfriend she was bored with? I mean, I get it. I didn't mention my boyfriend when I first met Matt.

No, I wasn't devising a cheating plot or anything. I simply didn't mention the guy because I knew that I was breaking up with him next time I saw him.

Of course, I didn't anticipate Matthew asking me out before that, but "Rejection Day" became the day he proposed three years later, so it all worked out alright for him, I suppose.

And it all worked out for Lucy and "that Bradford", too.

There better be some fics out here that fill in the blanks, because this is another one of those episodes where I have a lot of question marks remaining long after the credits roll.

"Damn it's good to see you hot pants. " "Hot pants." "It's an inside joke."

Inside jokes I get, but it seems like she might explain that one to Tim sometime. Like, I had a nickname at uni from my buddy Sam. We never had interest in one another, but he liked to call me Hot Stuff.

That is... until his Dance Appreciation class had to sit in on my Modern Dance class and he saw me in dance tights. Henceforth, I was Ghetto Booty.

Look, I'm Hispanic and in my thighs and bum... it shows.

No, Matthew never called me either name. So, I get having nicknames and weird in-jokes with someone you'd never be interested in dating. But I do hope she clued Tim in later.

Wesley Hires a Bristow

Is this Sydney's second secret sister? Fellow Alias fans know what I mean. But, as soon as I heard the name I started chuckling aloud, hoping it was a reference.

"You're kidding. Thanks." "Kidding about what" "Uh nothing."

What the hell just went down? Because on this show "nothing" never means nothing. Tim is clearly upset about something.

"You left so early." *arm touch* "I had this whole Valentine's breakfast planned."

D'aww. I mean, that's super cute. I'm kinda sad that Tim missed out on it, but I'm also eager for Tim to cook for Lucy. It's one of those things that I love about them—they both cook.

When Matthew and I met he claimed he could cook one things—eggs. Spoiler Alert: he could not cook eggs.

"Uh, you were up late. I let you sleep."

Marry him. Immediately. That is seriously husband material, right there.

Like, one of the sweetest things Matthew can do for me is let me sleep in. Even before we had kids, he'd let me sleep in and I treasured it.

Lucy, marry that man as soon as you can. He's a keeper!

He's also super on edge. He's looking all around like he doesn't know how to feel comfortable in his own skin.

"We didn't keep you up, did we? " "No, it's fine." *she stops him with a touch* "Hey. Are you okay?" "Yeah. Fine."

You are not fine. You are so fucking far from fine that "fine" is in another zip code. And Lucy knows it.

This girl speaks Tim like no other. So when her man's upset, she knows it. Remember, she "rode long enough with" Tim to know when he's upset. And Tim is upset.

But right now, he wants to focus on work.

"Finally. I'll get right to it."

Grey was not happy Chenford was late getting in. Yikes! Just how late did he let her sleep in!?

"Bradford. Chen. Hold back."

I can hear the kids in elementary school now. "Oooohhh, Lucy and Tim are in truuuubullll!"

In reality, it's just Tim. And poor Tim is already on-edge, and you can hear it coming out in his conversation with Grey.

"I want metro to be ready to move on these guys at a moment's notice." ... "That's why you'll be riding with Chen and Foster today, so there'll be no delays."

From the promos, I was curious how we ended up with these two riding together, again. And, I'm not mad at it, at all!

Shop Talk has been a big deal with these two over the years. So, I'm sure it'll be juicy.

"Everybody adores me, right?" *shoulder touch* "Yup."

Or... not. Tim's barely staying a thing even when he has the chance to compliment his lady.

He's not happy. Lucy is trying to be cordial to her friend and also get through to her boyfriend, but right now attempting both isn't helping her with Tim.

Lucy pulls away from Tim and turns to talking work, which she hopes might work better on Tim. Whatever's bothering him, it's deep. She's going to have to ease him into it.

"We broke up. Well, she broke up with me."

Very similar dialogue to the "Tim tells Lucy about the Ashley breakup" scene. It jumped out at me immediately. I'm not sure if that was an unintentional happenstance, or a reference to the fact that Noah simply wasn't with the right person.

Your guess is as good as mine.

"I'm starting to think the undercover life isn't conducive to a happy relationship."

Tim's. Face. Because he knows all about this. Tim was married to a UC and it didn't go well. And while I think it's a little harsh to blame UC on a relationship ending, we're building quite the use case reference here.

Nyla and her ex. Tim and his ex. Noah and his ex.

If the show's trying to make a point with this, I'm suddenly nervous about Tim and Lucy's path when I haven't been before.

Lucy deserves the chance to go deep cover if she wants it. And Tim would understandably have reservations.

I won't pretend I haven't fantasized about Season 5 ending with Lucy going deep cover and us coming back to Season 6 with a time-jump. But since we haven't yet heard word about Season 6 at all, I'm sitting here twiddling my thumbs and hoping Chenford simply survive until the end of the season.

Look, I've got a lot of ship trauma. I want to fully trust, but like my friend Tim, here, I'm not always the best at trust.

"Well, I mean, that probably depends on the couple." "Is that why you're still on Patrol?"

Oooh. Noah just accused Lucy of putting her career on pause for Tim. Yikes.

And, to Lucy's point, I haven't seen her offered a lot of UC this season. It's not like she's been turning offer after offer down, fending off assignments with a stick.

Lucy loves UC and she definitely wants to do it. It's true that she might not be going after those assignments because she's caught in the throes of new love and wants to get this on a solid footing first.

And I think that's important. Because, I feel a big Lucy UC assignment coming. Yes, my feelings could be as unreliable as the Psychic Network, but it does make sense narratively.

"...you were by far the most talented cop at UC school. Be a shame if you didn't take the plunge."

Tim glances over at Lucy, and she has her "pensive" face on. She's considering Noah's words, and I think it's fair that she does.

Look, Tim's advanced his career (unknowingly with Lucy's help) and it's about time Lucy had the opportunity to advance hers.

I'm not a fan who's ready for Tim and Lucy to settle down in a three bedroom home with a meyer lemon tree in the backyard tending babies all day.

And I say this lovingly as a very active mother of three. Lucy deserves the chance to go after what she wants out of her career. I'm blessed to have the kind of husband who supports me working and going after my passions.

I very famously turned down a steady gig to go freelance almost six years ago. I told him I thought it was a better choice. His response? "I disagree, but I support your decision."

Husband of the year, right there. I want Lucy to feel fulfilled career-wise. But I have a feeling this is going to be a future source of angst for Tim and Lucy—and rightfully so.

Tim's reservations are completely understandable. I mean, we've already mentioned the three relationships in their friend circle negatively impacted by UC.

Now, was UC the contributing factor to these relationships ending? Probably not. But it is a commonality that can cloud the fact that each of these relationships likely had other issues.

But I can completely understand how Tim might miss those subtleties. And that's going to be a source of conflict for these two, I think. We'll see if I'm right... only a handful of episodes left in the season!

"Why are you so cranky? First Valentine's Day. You should be basking in the glow of new love." "That's right. What are you guys doing tonight?" "We are not talking about Valentine's Day plans on an open channel."

Tim appreciates that, at least. Look, I love these scenes where the Found Family all get to interact, even if it's only over the radio. But, he has a point, and Lucy comes in to back him up.

They've got each other's backs... even when one of them is obviously pissed and closed off.

But Lucy watches Tim as Grey talks. She's trying to figure him out, because he's barely looking at her. He's barely talking.

And while we all know that Tim isn't the most talkative of guys in the Shop, he usually talks to Lucy. Right now, he's erected an invisible wall between them, and while Lucy can't see it, she can feel the heat of the electricity running through it.

*arm touch* "Out with it." "What?" "What is wrong with you today?" "Nothing." "Bull. "

First off, on this show nothing is ever nothing. Second, have you ever wished that they could just say bullshit on network television? Like, I know there's S&P to deal with, but wouldn't it feel good!?

I remember how excited we all were when Mulder could say "dicking around" in the first X-Files movie when we saw it in theaters. Yes, I'm that old.

But Melissa O'Neil puts as much as she can behind that "bull" so we totally know Lucy Chen is thinking the rest. Like usual, Lucy's calling Tim on his shit.

"Is it Noah? Are you jealous?"

Not like usual, she's actually wrong about what's bothering Tim.

"This is about you going behind my back to get me into Metro." "I did not... " *look from Tim*

Oooh, he's pissed. And, look, I know I talked a lot about wanting Tim to find out he was loved, but finding out that his girlfriend went behind his back to manipulate the situation when he thought he'd earned his place? Ooof. Yeah, that stings.

Think about the moment he got to tell Lucy he got into Metro. He was over-the-moon. He talked about the "rockstar review" he received from Grey and Lucy confirmed it by telling him that he was amazing.

He actually wanted to go out and celebrate himself. Do you know how big that is for someone who grew up with trauma and abuse?

I still struggle with buying myself a dress that isn't off the thrift store rack because I don't know if it's worth it to spend money on myself after I was called selfish as a child. Tim had a father who beat into his head (literally) that he was worthless, without value, and broken.

But for one fleeting second, Tim felt like everything was right in the world. And now that memory is tainted.

Because he didn't earn his place. Right? His girlfriend manipulated it, word has somehow gotten out, and now he has to worry about his manipulation because nobody's going to believe he's good enough.

Tim is so in his own head about this that he can't see it through Lucy's lens. He only has his own, and he's frustrated and fumbling.

"I had to do something. You were miserable riding that desk. " "Okay. Fine. But how do you think that makes me look?" "What?" "How does that make me look? My girlfriend has to solve my problems for me?"

Tim relying on others has never been his strong suit. We know he doesn't ask for help. He doesn't think he deserves it, too often, but he also thinks it makes him look weak.

Again, this is side effects of the trauma he received as a child backed up by a society that emphasizes strong, tough men who don't cry because somehow emotion is a sign of weakness.

Also, can we talk about Tim calling her his girlfriend!? All I need now is for Lucy to introduce Tim as her boyfriend. Yes, I know she told Noah that Tim was in her bed, but I like hearing the labels from her because she's the one who always shied away from them.

Tim is different. But right now Tim is pissed.

"Please tell me this is not some fragile male ego thing." "That is not what's happening here."

He stated it at the top of the conversation—she went behind his back. She lied to him. She feigned ignorance when he told her about it. She manipulated the situation and he was left to find out about it from someone else.

I always wanted Tim to find out... but not like this. Yikes.

I also think Tim might feel like his place was handed to him instead of earned. He is mad that others are going to look at him like we do university students whose parents bribed the admissions' office... with skepticism that they should be there at all.

We, gentle readers, know that's not how it went down. But Tim is hurting and often when we are hurting we shut others out and stew. Tim's practically the king of that.

"Come on! We were just trying to help." "We? Who else was involved?" "Did I say we? Me. Me was trying to help. I was trying to help."

Girl, your ass was just saved by your Backseat Buddy. Although, listening to Lucy talk like Elmo for a second had me rolling.

Tim passes a glare Lucy's way, but she completely misses it. And something about the look that Eric Winter puts into his eyes is completely different from all the glaring Tim has done at Lucy in this Shop before.

And, yes, I'm aware that sounds mental. But it definitely feels more... personal. More raw. More hurt than angry.

Tim's Office

Before we go any further, I have to compare this to 5x09 when she stepped into Grey's office to tell Tim that she'd released the Fourth String Quarterback from her life.

She knocked at the door before coming in. But, here, she slips in as easily as she would her own home. There's comfort, here. Even though they're fighting, she doesn't feel unwelcome. She doesn't feel out of place.

And that confidence in their relationship is sexy as hell. Lucy isn't spiraling because they had a fight. She knows they will get through this. That they are worth it.

Tim's the one who said it back in 5x08 and now they are living it. Tim and Lucy are worth the risk.

"I get why you're angry. Even though you were miserable as court liaison and I spear-headed an almost impossible five person trade to save you, I shouldn't have done it all behind your back."

That was the first thing he said when he told her what was wrong. He was left out of the loop. He was lied to. By the one person he trusts most.

Remember how much I hated all the lying in that episode? Lying catches up to you, even if it's well-intentioned. I guess I don't feel so weird about being so bothered by it seeing that Tim is similarly bothered.

And Tim appreciates Lucy understanding why he is bothered.

"Is that an apology?" "Yes." "Good." "Noo."

I'm having whiplash between so many episodes... Post DOD chat and 5x09 first scene for the "Good". 5x08 for Lucy answering "yes" then "no" to Tim.

Seriously, I think my neurons temporarily short-circuited on that one, because I missed most of the rest of this the first time around, even with subtitles on (because I transcribe live while I watch).

"Because you never would have let me work my magic if I had told you. And then I would have ended up transferring to another station to save you from yourself. And... this worked out so much better. And if you can't see that I'm sorry not sorry."

I'm dying laughing at this. Simply because Lucy started as many sentences with "And" in a short span as I always do. Seriously. Take a look at these Metas. I'm not unaware.

But this is also so her. And when she's being this damn cute, it's hard for Tim to be mad.

That, and she's right. This did work out well, and whatever temporary feelings he has about it, they'll disappear with time. Because he did earn his place. He is amazing. And Lucy acted with love, even if she might not have done it in the best way.

Lucy is more important than the job to him. We already know that.

"Okay..." *giggle* "I accept your non-apology."

Oh, she knew she had him as soon as he cracked that smile. That's why she giggled. I love giggly-in-love-Lucy. It's one of my favorite things.

Like, Melissa O'Neil has imbued Lucy with the cutest giggle known to man, and I smile every time I hear it. It's like Pavlov's Bell, except instead of salivating, I'm beaming.

"Good." "Good."

Are we in a performance of The Court Jester, here? Much as I love that movie, I wasn't expecting to be thrown into it with Chenford. Not ever.

Wow, I need to watch that movie, again, soon. Trust me. Danny Kaye is a treasure.

"So, are we going to dinner or what?" "We are. But your outfit is missing a little something." "What?"

Our girl is fiiiine, Tim. What the hell are you talking about?

Lucy's eyes fall on the box, and she's completely surprised. Remember, this is the girl who had to convince Tim to buy his girlfriend Rachel a birthday present.

Valentine's isn't even a cake holiday, and Tim's here with a jewelry box for his woman?

Endgame. Energy. Tim and Lucy are meant to be, forever and ever.

"Happy Valentine's Day."

Lucy looks at that man like she's ready to marry him right there in his office. The nicest thing he's gifted her before was a sweet final review. And when it comes to picking presents, he's been pretty awful.

Remember, Lucy has had a front-row view to his last three relationships. She didn't expect anything from Tim.

But it's not all those other women. It's Lucy. And since she's had a front-row seat in the past, she knows that this is different for Tim. Tim is doing something for her he wouldn't have done for the others.

And she knows that. She knows how much he loves her, even if they haven't yet said the words. And as she gazes up at him, savoring him before even glimpsing at the gift, she knows she loves him, too.

Because, no matter what he gave her, the gift is in the giving. Tim Bradford went out of his way to ensure she had a present to open. And she will remember how this moment feels the rest of her life.

And I'm now hyper-aware of all my "and" starting sentences.

Back to Tim and Lucy:

"Oh, wow. It's beautiful."

Whatever it is. Look, I don't mean to be cynical or critical, but I seriously have no idea what that necklace is, but I'm so happy Lucy loves it!

"Did you pick this out yourself?" "I did. is that shocking?" "No. You clearly have good taste."

Just wait until the ring, baby! Because we all know that can't be far behind!

And I'm not trying to marry them off, or anything. I'm just saying, we just got confirmation from the woman herself that Tim has good taste. So, when he takes a little trip to the ring counter, we know it's gonna be good.

And just as she once did with her best friend, who is now sadly gone, Lucy sweeps her hair out of the way so he can put the necklace around her neck.

Tim murmurs a "thank you" as Lucy starts to shift gears in her mind. He's standing amazingly close, his hands grazing her neck. He even ensures the charm is centered on her throat before pulling away.

That detail is so personal, and I'm curious if that was actor-choice, director-choice, or script-choice because it makes the moment for me.

"Do you want to skip dinner?"

No. She. Didn't. It's her "Do you wanna come in?" voice. Same cadence, too! Girl wants him just as bad now as she did then.

Tim looks to her, like he's briefly considering it.

"No. I'm hungry, and you're gonna need that fuel for later."

Chenford, meet makeup sex.

Tim touches her back as he shimmies out of his mini office (it really is the day for putting Timmy in Tiny places), leaving her breathless.

Her hand is already on her necklace, holding onto the charm—a physical touchstone to remind her of his love for her. Because he bought this gift for her.

The price tag doesn't matter. The intention does. He somehow did this surreptitiously as an act of love.

Lucy has never felt this loved. We know about the guy who made her sob in her car, the one who cheated on her while she was living with him, Nolan and his easy dumping of her, Emmett and his easy dumping of her, and then Curried Chris who loved an idea of her... not her.

Tim Bradford loves Lucy Chen. She smiles to herself as she follows after him because this mixed feeling of being turned on by an act of love is new. It's the layers that all her relationships before lacked.

Tim and Lucy walked into this relationship already very layered people with a layered relationship. So, it makes sense that their shared romance is also layered.

And they just survived their first fight as a couple. And they are stronger for it.

And... there are too many sentences starting with "and".

Thank you so much for reading and spending this time with me.

I've seen some folks on the Twitterverse complaining about a lack of kiss. Considering tonight might be the first time I remember seeing James and Nyla kiss, I'm not freaking out that we didn't get a kiss. We got a lot.

This episode was packed with Chenford moments. Sleeping together. Waking up together. Having each other's back. Lucy touching Tim every five seconds. First fight as a couple (because their first fight was the first day they met). A freakin' Valentine's Day gift, and it's a necklace. And Tim put it on her. And they're going to dinner, which means they've had reservations a while because they're a pill to get for big romance days.

[waitingtobelit]

Title: In Midnights, In Cups of Coffee Characters/Pairings: Evan Buckley/Tommy Kinard Rating: Teen for language. Genre: Angst, fluff, queer themes. Summary: Movie nights are mostly held at Tommy’s place for several reasons.

Mostly, though, Buck gravitates towards Tommy’s house more and more these days because Tommy’s house feels more like home. He loves cuddling with Tommy on the couch, the two of them sharing a couple of beers and some popcorn, and sometimes a blanket thrown over them. Honestly? Movie nights with Tommy might be Buck’s favorite place in the world.

--

Buck and Tommy watch Rent together and have a lot of feelings about it and each other.

Notes: Title comes from "Seasons of Love" from Rent.

This was written for bucktommy positivity week, prompt one: what they love most about each other and after I got inspired by listening to "Seasons of Love" and getting caught up in my Rent feelings! This could probably technically also apply to the hobbies and dates prompt but I have another fic I'm working on for that one. :3

There are spoilers for Rent overall and implied death of a character from Rent but nothing explicit.

For @bucktommypositivityweek prompt one: What they love most about each other.

In Midnights, In Cups of Coffee

Buck’s never been totally into musicals but he also hasn’t totally disliked them, either. Maddie used to play some Broadway soundtracks when she would drive him to school; she was really into Phantom of the Opera and something about some guy stealing a loaf of bread and miserable people, from what he remembers. He might have given her some good old fashioned Brotherly Teasing about her taste in music every now and then but he always preferred her taste in music to that of his parents, the most stale white bread of WASP easy listening that he’s fairly certain they play on an endless loop on Spotify in Hell. If Hell exists, that is.

There were other musicals, too; he memorized the lyrics to “Defying Gravity” unintentionally with how often Maddie played the Wicked soundtrack in the car. He may or may not have sometimes mumbled the lyrics to himself in the shower when he needed a moment to stop thinking about the weight of his parents looking right through him.

But overall, yeah, no. Buck’s never considered himself much of a musical person. Hen is the one who tells him about Rent after a particularly long and draining shift. She tells him that she thinks he’ll like it, and that he better text her immediately with all of his feelings after he watches the movie or listens to the soundtrack. (Hen insists he does both, and she also insists that he watch the live concert special that played on TV. But, also, he damn well better text her once he educates himself!)

So tonight, for movie night with Tommy, Buck suggests Rent as their movie of choice. Usually he’s happy to go along with whichever movie Tommy suggests, glad to continue his “cinematic education” as Tommy calls it. Tommy seems happy to go along with Buck’s suggestion; he nods and comments on how he always meant to get around to watching Rent himself but struggled and ultimately set it aside for later while he was still fighting his way out of the closet. (And this is one of Buck’s favorite things about Tommy; he’ll reveal himself through conversation, letting Buck get to know him on a deeper, more intimate level, without any expectation or pressure for Buck to reciprocate, although, of course, Buck always tries to do so, wanting to meet Tommy where he is.)

Movie nights are mostly held at Tommy’s place for several reasons: Tommy has the larger, more comfortable couch (Buck could seriously live in those cushions for days, if not years, and has fallen asleep easily in the middle of a movie on more than one occasion), Tommy has the actual collection of movies, both physical and otherwise, and Tommy has the better television. Mostly, though, Buck gravitates towards Tommy’s house more and more these days because Tommy’s house feels more like home. He loves cuddling with Tommy on the couch, the two of them sharing a couple of beers and some popcorn, and sometimes a blanket thrown over them. Honestly? Movie nights with Tommy might be Buck’s favorite place in the world.

Tonight, they have Tommy’s favorite craft beer, a local brewery that specializes in utilizing local ingredients and combining them into unique flavors that even Buck has to admit taste pretty damn amazing. Tommy is slowly but surely is weaning him off of his “frat boy” beers, talking about the benefits of craft beer every chance he gets. His enthusiasm for craft beer in the way he talks about ingredients with his hands and the way he shares all of the details about the history of all his favorite brands is as convincing as the taste of the beer itself, honestly. And Buck adores Tommy for it, so the fact that they have his favorite craft beer for a movie night in which Buck picks the movie? Means the world to Buck. And judging from the way Tommy’s eyes, so blue and so mesmerizing, linger on him, his face scrunched up in a smile? Buck likes to believe he isn’t the only one.

Buck cooks fried mac and cheese rolls for their movie snack; seeing his cooking efforts next to Tommy’s beer warms him like he’s just spent the day out in the August sun, trying to catch some waves with salt water clinging to his skin. He can’t keep from smiling at the sight; the way both the food and the drinks spell out home without words.

Tommy turns to him, leaning in close to press a soft, sweet kiss to his lips. “I think we’re in for our best movie night yet,” he says, looking like a Botticelli angel in the glow of the lamps on his side tables, his hair curly and free of product and his perfect mouth wide in a soft, tender smile. And he’s all Buck’s; Buck gets to have him all to himself. He leans in for another kiss, just because.

“I think you’re right,” Buck tells him, pulling back to settle into the couch. Tommy grabs his hand, intertwining their fingers together, as he settles himself and presses play on the movie.

Buck has chills from the opening scene and the opening song; a brightness like hope unfurls within his soul, fluttering upwards with each lyric sung and the beginning of the story unfolding. Just from the words alone, he feels seen. Tommy’s hand squeezes his; out of the corner of his eyes, he catches sight of the same kind of brightness in Tommy’s eyes.

Rent unfolds like a kaleidoscope; vivacious and full of soul, a cry of defiance and a love story – an utter act of the opposite of war. Buck finds himself unable to look away, greedily drinking in every song and every scene as though this story and these characters are the gold turning the cracks in his soul into art. He leans his head onto Tommy’s shoulder, wanting to soak up all of this with the man he loves. Tommy leans his head against Buck’s; Buck feels Tommy’s smile pressing into the side of his head the same way Mimi asks Roger to light her candle and the same way Angel and Collins promise to cover each other.

Buck sees himself in Maureen; he sees himself in Mimi. He seems himself in Roger and Mark, and he sees himself in Angel and Collins. He feels seen; free. This is community; this is love. You don’t find it son; you make it.

By the time “I’ll Cover You (Reprise)” comes around, Buck is a complete wreck; tears falling like heavy rain down his face as he shakes, the hand that isn’t clinging desperately to Tommy’s pressing against his own face as though he might be able to press his grief back into himself and swallow it down. Tommy’s tears land on his shirt just as his own land on Tommy’s. He holds onto Angel, Collins, and their love for one another the way he holds onto Tommy’s hands.

By the time the movie ends and the credits roll, Buck feels both hollowed out and also renewed; the glass half-empty but also half-full. His whole face feels raw; hell, his whole soul feels raw. He feels alive but also like he’s just risen from the dead after having his heart torn to shreds.

Silence lingers between them, charged and crackling, like embers about to turn even more incendiary. Buck is about to make an attempt to speak when Tommy speaks first.

“I can’t believe it took me so long to watch Rent,” Tommy admits, pulling back to meet Buck’s gaze directly. “I feel like I really could have used that movie when I was younger.” He speaks into words the exact feelings Buck finds himself wrestling with internally; he can’t help but turn to glance up at Tommy, agreement shining in his tear-stained eyes and equally tear-stained smile. He feels like a complete mess but Tommy, pressing a kiss into the top of his head, likes him anyway. He’s the luckiest man in the whole goddamned world.

“Yeah,” he says, nodding. “I think I could have used that movie when I was younger, too.” Maybe he would have understood his bisexuality sooner; maybe he would’ve only felt a spark leading to a fireworks revelation (or fake mouth static by way of helicopter rescue) later on in life. But he wonders how his life would have turned out if his younger self learned that family can be people you choose; that creation is so much more potent than self-destruction. He wonders if maybe he could have saved himself some trouble and a few scars along the way.

Tommy squeezes Buck’s hand before bringing it up to his mouth to press a kiss against the back of it; Buck shivers in response. Tommy leans in and kisses him softly; Buck returns the kiss with a quiet gasp of relief. Tommy comforts him, sturdy and warm like a weighted blanket. (Also, he realizes, he owes Hen at least two rounds of wine and beer and a college essay worth of texts summing all of his big damn feelings about Rent.)

“Thank you for suggesting Rent for movie night,” Tommy tells him, earnest and soft. “Can I pay you back in a thousand sweet kisses?”

Buck laughs, tilting forward to press his forehead against Tommy’s. He squeezes their hands together again.

“Only if I can pay you back in five hundred twenty-five thousand and six hundred kisses myself.”

[goombasa]

SLARPG and Writing Good Relationships

So originally this was an idea I was going to try and make a video about not long after Super Lesbian Animal RPG came out. Due to a number of factors, that obviously never happened, but it's a topic that I do want to at least talk about, both because I think it's a fun discussion to have, and because I just love this game so much. It's like… it's really, really good, guys.

Super Lesbian Animal RPG (heretoafter referred to as ‘SLARPG’ for simplicity) is a turn-based RPG released in December of 2022. It was created and published by Ponett, largely a one-person development team headed by Bobby Schroeder, someone who I was already familiar with via their blog “Thanks, Ken Penders”, an analysis and retrospective of the various Sonic the Hedgehog comics published by Archie and written by Ken Penders.

The game boasts a banger soundtrack, and beautifully realized world that combines magic and technology together in interesting ways, fun and colorful character designs and a simple combat system that makes you think about what sort of moves you have the resources for in the moment, with a difficulty curve that is just right. Even at the peak of your power by the end of the game, you can't just steamroll everything, and the game wants you to keep paying attention from the start of the game all the way to the end.

But at its heart, the real driving force in its narrative, at least to me, is the relationship between our main character, Melody, and her best friend, now girlfriend, Allison. Their relationship is beautiful in how its portrayed, mostly because it doesn't try to present their romance as anything special. They goof off, they joke with one another, they speak casually, but they aren't dramatic about their own relationship, it feels completely natural. You are very aware of the fact that these two were very close friends before they started dating, just from listening to the two of them chat with one another. It's not only very cute, but it also grounds the two of them as a very normal, relatable couple, despite being adventurers for hire in a world where they regularly fight off slimes and minor nuisances around their own.

Watching their relationship grow as the game goes on, with the stress of an invading, reality-warping force coming after their world, is fascinating, because despite the adventure, a lot of what happens with them is very mundane. We see the two of them confront their personal hang ups, we see the two of them eventually have a full communication breakdown that actually really hurts their relationship for a while, but despite the situation that causes it, the way that they work around it, and how they handle it, it all feels so real. Their observation that they felt like they were tiptoing around each other, worried about upsetting one another before their first big argument was such a massive moment for me especially, that I felt myself kind of deflate in relief in my chair after witnessing it.

(I'd give more context, but I really want anyone who hasn't already to play this game, so please, please, if you want more context for what I'm talking about, go and play this wonderful game!)

Melody and Allison's relationship is also contrasted well with their other party members. Jodie, who is the most experienced adventurer in the group, was already in a relationship pre-game with the Guardian (leader of the paladins), Faith. Her relationship is stable, but the workload placed on faith, and her own job as an adventurer does mean that their professional lives often lead to separation between them, and while they love each other, they do realize that finding a good work/life balance is something they need to adjust to, even after being in a relationship for a while. But because their relationship is more mature, the two of them are pretty good at handling their rockier challenges in their relationship, at least for what we're shown of it.

Then there's Claire, who definitely has one of the bigger character arcs in the game, with her journey being just as much centralized on finding value in herself before she actually ends up in a relationship, which is another good contrast because it relates back to Melody's struggles with her own self image as well. These relationships and stories could have easily just been their own standalone stories with no real bearing on the main plot, but the relationships, both romantic and platonic, are woven into both the main conflict and each other's relationships so well that it feels as though they grow as a group as well as individuals.

Relationships are also woven into gameplay as well. Not so much that they are the major focal point of combat, but in smaller ways that are meant to reinforce the relationships between characters. Characters that are in a relationship for example, can choose to take a turn to smooch their significant other, which gives a temporary buff to the participants' stats. There's even a counter in the pause menu that keeps track of the number of smooches you've given. It doesn't affect anything, but it's a cute addition. This gives certain events in the story more weight when you temporarily lose access to the ability to smooch. It is integration between story and gameplay that I love to see in my RPGs.

The game is really a romance disguised as a traditional, adventurous RPG. It's main focus is on its characters and their building relationships. That is the main focus, and because of that, the romance and everything related to it feels front and center, but not separate from the main plot. The two are woven together wonderfully in their themes and experiences, and that, to me, makes this one of the best written romance games I have played, and I'm counting games where getting into a relationship is the main focus.

If you're looking for some wonderfully written characters, a nostalgic feeling RPG systems from the 16-bit era, some clever writing, and a colorful adventure, Super Lesbian Animal RPG is absolutely something you should play. It is absolutely worth its asking price and I am wondering if we'll see more of this world and these characters down the line. I sure hope so. You can visit the game's steam page HERE (#NotSponsored).

I love these girls.

[ariadnew]

MONACO 2023

Absolutely, categorically, not even slightly a date.

Which is why I listened exclusively to the soundtrack from A Room with a View while making these photos. Because it's absolutely, categorically, not even slightly sweepingly romantic and beautiful and evocative of grand but devastatingly ephemeral holiday loves.

Not even slightly.

@highgrovesims3 can even confirm.

The thing about this blog is that I'm a bit like an ice-berg: a lot more going on than first meets the eye. You could also say extremely cold and largely void of life at its core. That would technically be correct. But mostly the other thing. The activity thing. That.

-I'll stop with my bad jokes. This set was/is yet another of the many I begin with big plans, then sort of lose drive to finish after my ideas become too big for me to realise. It was, in all seriousness, a spontaneous idea conceived to cheer up my very good pal Maria Jones- I'd never planned to do this; we never discussed doing anything like it. I took all these photographs before I even took my entry pictures (I'm responsible like that) This set really could have been done better, but I'm really lazy when it comes to the game now, you know? There's also writing I began to go along with it, but if we waited for that to be finished it'd be another two years before anyone saw this post (if at all) so... that's that.

Anyway: the point of all this rambling is that I'm on a hard-drive cleaning kick at the moment, and as such I'm queuing a few things— more CTJL Monaco; old CTJL side projects; a winter series; random tomfoolery and more— to appear at arbitrary points over the next few months. Take cover, in other words.

[stormyoceans]

I can't stop listening to the opening of FNoL. It's such an incredible song! I can't remember the last time I didn't skip the opening credits. Those moles on Neil's face! his pleasant voice! (Charles, damn it why don't you sing in all your series!) Xiao Hai's sweet encouraging smile! Their bickering over coffee! Ooooo I'm sooo drowned in this show! But 20 minutes Carl!!!!! Monica thank you for telling me about this series. I feel such an unprecedented surge of love inside me💜🎉

THE WAY I WAS SO SURPRISED AND EXCITED TO GET A FIRST NOTE OF LOVE MESSAGE THAT I BUMPED MY KNEE INTO MY DESK AND ACTUALLY SAW THE PROVERBIAL STARS FSDHFKJDGSFJGSDJ WORTH IT TBH

BUT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IM SOOOOO HAPPY YOU STARTED THE SHOW AND THAT YOU’RE LIKING IT ANON!!!!!!!!!!

i could not agree with you more about the opening song, it’s just SO GOOD, but to be fair im so in love with the entire soundtrack of this show, i’ve had it on repeat for a whole week and i still haven’t gotten tired of it!!!!! the song neil sings the very first time he meets xiao hai as a kid is probably my favorite rn, just because i ADORE charles’ voice and that scene in episode 2 with the juxtaposition of neil and xiao hai playing it (LITERALLY GAVE ME GOOSEBUMPS), but again, all the songs are amazing and i think you really can tell that they took a lot of care in making the music for the series. the other night i actually watched this small featurette about it and i love that they worked so hard on the physicality of the actors while they sing and play the instruments too!!!!!!

the funniest thing is. i honestly still have no idea why this series got me so badly, especially since i have a very complicated relationship with taiwanese BLs and im not particularly into age gaps, but for some reason the dynamic between neil and xiao hai just works SO MUCH for me!!!!!! and im once again reminded how subjective chemistry is because i’ve seen a lot of comments saying that charles and michael don’t really have it, or that they have only a platonic kind of chemistry, meanwhile im sitting here clawing at the curtains and climbing the walls of my apartment every time they look at each other because michael as xiao hai has these moments where he’s giving such ‘you were my sexual awakening and i haven’t had a single chaste thought about you since forever’ energies when he’s around neil, meanwhile charles has clearly gone to the jimmy jitaraphol’s school of looking at your co-star with a love so all consuming and full of adoration and a devotion so palpable and plain to see it drives people to the brink of suicide (IT’S ME IM PEOPLE)

and much to my embarrassment i could actually go on rambling about this show for a few more hours but im shutting up rn because this already got way too long ;;;;;;;; BUT YEAH THE EPISODES BEING SO SHORT REALLY IS THE ONLY NEGATIVE THING ABOUT IT (i wanted to watch episode 5 on company's time but I NEED TO MAKE THOSE 20 MINUTES LAST)

HOPING AND PRAYING AND MANIFESTING IT WILL KEEP BEING THIS GOOD UNTIL THE END

[incorrect-jojolands-quotes]

Current JOJOLands character playlists

These playlists are based on my headcanons on what I think each character listens to and their music taste.

Songs are chose to be made before March 2023 to fit the storyline assumption that The JOJOLands takes place in mid February 2023 and the characters only know of news and events up to that point.

Jodio's Shit🅱️ost 🅱️ongs

Jodio definitely listens to rap music but, like many younger Gen Z kids, there's a bit of variety due to memes and trends. There's a few sad songs sprinkled in there for those nights where he's in his feels. But, expect some silliness nonetheless. Artists include: Tyler the Creator, Kendrick Lamar, Joji

🌸 Dragona's Driving Beats!!!

Going off how Dragona loves Dua Lipa, they seem like the type to be into whatever Gen Z girls are into at the moment. Mostly Top 40 pop hits, I wanted to give the vibe of a fun road trip or a lively day at the mall. It also gives a very summery vibe for sure! Artists include: Dua Lipa, Beyonce, Harry Styles

Paco's Sigma Gym Hits 💪

Phonk and Hardstyle are two genres that have been trending in gym culture, particularly in the "we go jim, you mirin brah" subculture of it. Many in this subculture are also anime enjoyers, so there is a nod to it via eurobeats and other references. Artists include: Kordhell, Hardstyle Gymbro, Initial D Soundtrack

Usagi's 🐰Random Play Dance🐰

Something about Usagi strikes me as a K-pop stan. Due to the oftentimes high intensity choreography, it's a huge trend to learn and perform dances on the fly, so this playlist doubles as Usagi's lists of dances to learn. It's a range of new and classic tunes. Artists include: NewJeans, BTS, ATEEZ

Charming's Ballad 🎀 Time

Going off how Charming loves Sia, Sza, and HER, he loves the pop soul and R&B genres. The artists chosen not only follow these genres but I like to think Charming likes to be in his feels by singing his heart out with any of these songs chosen. Artists include: Sam Smith, Bruno Mars, Billie Eilish

Bobby Jean's Bops

Honestly, most of the music are things my parents love to listen to when they're my age, and Bobby Jean seems to be their age right now. I went with new wave particularly because that is their favorite genre, but sprinked a few classic 80s while I'm at it. Artists include: Tears for Fears, Modern Talking, Madonna

💕💀Lulu's Vibe💀💕

The overall vibe of this playlist is "who's parents let their kids listen to this type of music?" but all the songs have been known on TikTok for audio edits and other trends. This also pairs well with the hyperpop mixed into the list as well. Artists include: Ayesha Erotica, Ice Spice, Lil Mariko

I'm finishing up Meryl Mei and Acca Howler's playlists so stay tuned. Let me know what you think so far.

[choosingwhatmatters]

"Reverie" in Dream episode 7

I think the last time I've had this much to say about the music of a particular piece of art was when I was writing my master's thesis. My goodness, I love tumblr! It's such a wonderful feeling to share thoughts and theories with people who are just as invested in a particular piece of art as I am. Thank you, y'all! I'm having a blast!

I start this post with a conclusion I seem to draw from every Dream episode: Dream sounds fantastic. As far as I can tell, they're only working with a few costum made melodies as well as the intro song and the two outro songs, but for me the soundtrack works beautifully. Today, I want to talk about the following scene:

@unrealcosima has already pointed out the music in the scene in which Wan and Kim have their only out-of-dream talk of the episode. Kim has learned about the alcoholism of Wan's mum as well as Wan's depression. In turn, Wan learns about Kim dating Mawin (but not the reason behind this decision). Interestingly, Wan seems to have only two modes when it comes to Kim: hardcore, clingy "I need you in my life, no matter what you need" and sad, dejected "it's okay, just live your life without me and be happy". Let's see whether that changes in future episodes. The music, at any rate, speaks a very clear language. It is the instrumental version of "Tha khuu fan di (Reverie)," the ending credit song of the first six episodes. It has an melancholic, ambient feel to it. It speaks of yearning and regret.

Music theory time: The yearning is mostly achieved by the harmonisation of the piece, meaning all the different notes that we can hear simultaneously at any given time of the piece. The harmonies in "Reverie" float, they glisten. They try to find their way home but never do. Home, in this case, is A flat major. I know this because of the other chords and the way they are positioned. Listen to the outro of the piece (which also serves as intro):

The very last chord you can hear is A flat major. This is where all the the other chords want to guide us. This is home. The beauty of the song is: We never get to hear A flat major. Not once. The chord you hear in the recording has been added by me, it never appears in the actual song. Home is so close, but we never get to step into the warmth of the firelight. That is one of the major contributors of the song's restless, melancholic energy.

The restlessness is also achieved by the note values of the piece, meaning how long one note lasts before it is followed by the next. The shortest note values are in the chorus, which sounds a little bit like this:

The tempo of the song itself is fairly slow (about 72 beats per minute) but the short note values (semi-quavers) drive us onward, forward. They don't allow us time to breathe. In the show, we're at the point where Wan has just told Kim to not come back to her simply out of a sense of obligation.

While we hear the chorus, Wan and Kim are silent until Kim gets a call from Mawin. The notes keep raining down and for me, they symbolise the thoughts shooting through Wan's head. As Kim talks, she keeps wondering one thing, and her question coincides with the end of the chorus: "Are you two together now?" When she gets an answer, even one she has feared, the music becomes once again calmer. (/music theory time)

We get to hear the chorus a second time, this time in its complete version including Mint's beautiful voice. It is when Wan gets up and walks away from Kim, leaving Kim first staring after her and then leaning on the table, looking like a sad little sea lion cub. Oh, my heart!

This was my music rant for this episode. Thank you for sticking around! I fear I won't be able to post anything about the next episode because I'll be chaperoning 160 teenagers on a class trip but I am very much looking forward to all the posts here!

[themultifandomgal]

Adam Ruzek- Single Dad Pt2

"So she actually threw up on you?"

"Yep it was awful. Like I was so embarrassed" Adam chuckles "but what about you. Any bad dates?" Adam and I are sat eating lunch in a really cute café

"Ughh to many to count. There was this one guy I started seeing and we were meant to be going on a date, he had picked me up but on the way to the restaurant I had a phone call to go back home as my mom had been called into work in an emergency. He really kicked off and refused to see me again. Actually refused to take me home. I had to call a taxi"

"What a jerk"

"Tell me about it"

"So what does you mom do then for work?"

"Oh she's a brain surgeon at Chicago Med. Sometimes she will get called in and I have to look after Jack"

"What about your dad? Where's he?"

"He and my mom split up when I was 10. Then she met Jacks dad who's actually in the army so we don't see him all that much"

"Oh I'm sorry"

"No it's ok. I get on with both my dad and Jacks. So does mom, she thought it would be best for us all if everyone got on"

"That's good. I wish I got on with Ally's mum, you know for her sake. I'm lucky I have some good friends"

"I'm sorry that her mom isn't involved, but it's her loss right? And I think it's sweet how your friends love her as if she was their biological family" my phone dings "sorry"

"No problem" I check my phone to see mom has been called in to do a surgery

"I'm so sorry, but I've got to go look after Jack"

"Hey no it's fine don't worry about it"

"I really am sorry" I stand up

"Hey why don't you bring him to mine? we can take them to the park"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes of course" Adam texts me his address

"Ok I'll see you in a bit then"

"But why?"

"Because were going to go to the park with Ally and Adam" I take Jacks coat of the hanger and help him put it on

"But why?"

"Jack please just do as I say"

"Where's mommy gone?"

"She's got to make people better" I finally get Jack out the house and into his car seat

"How long is the drive?"

"Not long" I type in Adams address into maps and start the car while Encanto soundtrack plays, Jacks current obsession

"We don't talk about Bruno" Jack yells making me laugh "no no no"

After a few minutes and a lot of singing we arrive at Adams

"Ok now you have to be a good boy for me ok?"

"Ok YN" I lift him out of his car seat then lock the car. We walk up to the door

"Can I press the bell?" Jack asks pointing to the door bell. I lift him up and he presses the bell. A few seconds later Adam opens up the door

"Hey bud you ready for a play date?" Adam asks Jack

"Yeah. Guess what" before Adam can even breath Jack is already telling him that we listened to the Encanto songs

"You did did you?" Adam looks at me

"Yup. We don't talk about Bruno on repeat. All the way here"

"Well Encanto is Ally's favourite film so shall we put it on?"

"Can we?" Jack asks me

"Yes of course"

"Yay" we walk in and Adam takes us to the living room. Ally is playing with a doll

"Hi Ally how are you?" I ask

"Good" she says shyly with her hair half in a bobble and half out

"I'm guessing your daddy did your hair?" I ask and she nods

"Can you do hair?" She asks me 

"Come here" I say as Adam puts on Disney+ and finds Encanto for the kids. I do a French plait for her

"YN and I will make you some snacks" Adam and I walk into the kitchen

"Sorry this isn't the date we planned" I sigh as Adam passes me a bowl and some crisps

"It's ok. We can always have another date" he shrugs

"So it's not been a complete disaster then?" I ask raising my eyebrows

"Definitely not" we take the snacks over to the kids while they are mesmerised by the TV. Adam and I go back into the kitchen to talk

"How often does Jack get to see his dad?" he asks making a drink

"Maybe every 4 months for a week? This is probably the longest he's been away, it's been about 6 months since he was home"

"Wow. How does your mother cope?"

"She works, a lot. That's why I help out, take Jack out and do things with him"

"Your good with him. Most siblings wouldn't do what you do"

"You think?" I raise my eyebrows.

For the rest of the afternoon Adam and I chat, then take Jack and Ally to the park and we also play games with them before it's time for Jack and I to leave. Jack goes to say bye to Ally while I say bye to Adam.

[wrongcaitlyn]

Okay so recently I’ve just begun to associate basically every song I’ve listened to to an imaginary karaoke night in tgol. Why this has happened I don’t even know, 💀. But it made me think about whether or not you had any game night/karaoke hcs for the characters. Like imagine Percy and Annabeth actually did sing Shallow, and I feel like Kayla would definitely be the person who’s either clearly beating everyone in monopoly or the person to flip the board in annoyance.

KSJDFS NO BC I LITERALLY DO THAT TOO if i can't find a way to make the lyrics fit one of the characters, then they're singing it at karaoke. i absolutely loveee the idea of karaoke/game nights and definitely want to eventually write one with the whole family + friend group bc it'd be so much fun😭

this gives me the opportunity to share this scenario i thought of like a while ago of a barbie-themed karaoke night. as in, everyone is singing songs from the barbie soundtrack. leo and jason perform i'm just ken (leo definitely dragged jason into it and it's a complete mess because jason can't stop laughing and leo keeps making him laugh), kayla and will have an entirely choreographed routine for dance the night (they memorized the movie dance and also at some point kayla def pulls out some gymnastics) and then piper and nico make everyone cry with what was i made for. shel films all of this and does the fandom a service by posting clips of it on tiktokLKSDF

but percy and annabeth are 100% singing duets, i also think they'd loveee to sing disney duets. like, i see the light, a whole new world, and you KNOW that percy's singing under the sea. horrendous fake accent and all.

nico, despite being the only actual singer of them all (aside from apollo, who's technically retired, and will jump to karaoke as soon as he hears the first note) is the most reluctant to sing, and instead usually films the rest of them as they embarrass themselves for blackmail material. (ofc, this only actually works on jason, seeing as everyone else is either a really good singer or sings horribly on purpose and won't be ashamed of it)

as for game night, it gets INTENSE. we already know that nico's the king of uno (a hc that runs through, like, every fic i write), and he's also extremely good at video games. leo has no idea how he beats him at mario kart, seeing as nico doesn't even have his drivers license at nineteen (though tbf that has nothing to do with mario kart). will, being the person who drives them the most, is chronically in eleventh place. apollo is twelfth, of course.

kayla and nico get scarily competitive, and it's up to austin and will to try and diffuse the tension while leo just pushes it on. and they're both actually really good at board games, so one of them is absolutely flipping the board while the other has bragging rights for weeks. monopoly is banned in the apollo household after nico accidentally made eight year old kayla cry (she was faking it, nico insists, and kayla winks at the imaginary camera because she absolutely was.)

i probably have more but i'm gonna leave it at that, all i know is that karaoke/game nights will always be incredibly chaotic and i love them for it. i'm literally the hugest fan of board/card games no matter how old i get, my family's always been huge at having them on holidays and whatnot, and i'm crazy competitive, so i just love the idea of all of them getting together to do that on birthdays and holidays and on random weekends as well :))

thank you for the ask!

[something-awful1]

my thoughts while rewatching all of Helluva Boss in honor of the S2 trailer PT 3

TRUTH SEEKERS - i sMelL.... c o l o r s 😮 - unrelated but i love the background music? like helluva has such a good soundtrack why didn't we get that for hazbin - i just like complaining - MOXXIE IS T H E BITCH - he's so me - i love this episode so much - blitz looks so chill this is so silly - I'm a VirGo- - I LOVE MOXXIE - i love the fight choreo in this episode so much - blitz is just :p - im sorry what is bitch juice - IT WAS ABOUT UGLY HORNY CATS HAHAHAHA - cue the coolest sequence in indie animation ever - IT TIS NO PRANK BITCH - BECAUSE YOUUU - MY PRECIOUS LITTLE BITCH BOY - ARE TRIPPING BAAAWWWWWLLLLLSSSS - brandon has the best line delivery istg - woah wait scribble moxxies dialogue is some of the best written dialogue in all of vivzie's projects - this animation is so cool i'm sobbing - this is one of my favorite episodes, i remember watching it when it came out and like actually sobbing - the dhorks are idiots why did they give them the truth serum but like not ask them any questions while they were under the influence of it? like- what was the point - THIS IS THE COOLEST FUCKING FIGHT SCENE EVER - no thoughts, head empty, just truth seekers fight choreo - see this is what happens when animators actually take time to make their projects look good, instead of trying to get everything out as quick as possible - millie is the coolest, go break that guy's neck with your thighs, get it bestie - OMG I HAVENT SEEN THIS EPISODE IN FOREVER I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE STOLAS - GET IT STOLASSSSSSSSSS - this is literally the coolest sequence - OWL IN A CAGE INSTRUMENTAL SPOTTED - bryce pinkham the line delivery of "how the FHUCK-" was perfect - this whole scene is perfect - HELP THE DHORKS LOOK SO CONCERNED AFTER BITZ AND STOLAS MAKE OUT - yeah this is the best episode so far, hands down OZZIES - i have never been more not ready - i have no thoughts on the beginning ngl - ugh the lust ring is so beautifully drawn, really some of vivzie's best backgrounds - not the bouncer dude implying that three people can't make one couple 🙄 - "that's a mood, gabriella" LITERALLY ONE OF THE BEST STOLAS LINES - his date outfit is so pretty - THE BOOKS ON HIS CHAIR HELP HOW DID I NEVER NOTICE THAT - blitz is so frustrating right now FUCKING TALK TO HIM INSTEAD OF SYPING ON M&M YOU PERVERT - FIZZZZZZ BABYYYY - damn imagine blitz realizing his ex-best friend and celebrity ex are at the same club as him while he's on a "date" with a goetia that must be fucking embarassing - fizz's "let's fuck him up babe" look is my favorite thing - house of asmodeus is peak songwriting, like i don't think vivzie will ever top this (i fucking hope she does though) - UGH THIS MAN'S VOICE - these two are the biggest fucking hypocrites - "you used to have a smoking wife, a kid, you had it all! i hope you didn't give it up, so you and him could get it up" is so gorgeously written and delivered - i could go into a whole analysis on stolitz rn but you could go read any other analysis on this episode and read the same shit so im not gonna - help why did he drive stolas hope? THE MAN CAN TELEPORT - stolas is so expressive i love him - OHHHH QUEEN BEE TAKES PLACE LIKE AT THE TAIL END OF OZZIES THAT MAKES MORE SENSE (queen bee took forever to come out so i was confused, i kinda forgot)

QUEEN BEE - ew i remember hating this episode so much - this feels so unfinished already - this is vivzie voicing the poodle bitch, isn't it - keshaaaaaa - i don't wanna listen to this song ngl - okay but the visuals are kinda good and i do love her voice - this must've taken forever to animate - HELP THE ONE SILENT LOONA LINE MAKES ME CRINGE SO HARD LIKE WHAT WAS SHE SAYING - she sounds like... constantly wasted as fuck - people definitely ship loona and bee don't they - i don't but like... i know someone does - i've heard a lot of people call bee bitchy, and fake, but yall i feel like she's being genuine - help she changes her mind so fucking fast - okay okay i don't hate this episode that much - blitz's little arm wave help - for reference i write all of these between the hours of 10pm and 3am, this is my complete, honest, unfiltered opinion - yeah this episode wasn't as bad as i remembered

[astarionancuntnin]

Unsolicited Lore Dump

Tagged by the amazing @nyx-knox - thank u i love u💕

Do you make your bed? EH once in a while i will flip back the 2 covers i use to sleep and i call it a day

Favorite number? 24, my birthdayyy

What's your job? im a Lead QA! i have a lil team of 8 nerds QAs that I help guide throughout the day and i love them so very much <3

If you could go back to school would you? oh YEAH theres so much stuff that im interested in, i think i would go back especially for languages or continue psychology

Can you parallel park? i dont wanna brag buttttttttttttt yes, and i learned solely based on a gif i saw pass around here YEARS ago before i even learned how to drive and got it on first try. my teacher was impressed uwu

Do you think aliens are real? THEY HAVE TO, the universe is so big, it would be dumb to think that were truly alone

Can you drive a manual car? god no i had an anxiety attack last time i tried. nono, i drive an electric car, i dont stress about no manual car

What's your guilty pleasure? ohhhhhhhhhhh good question. its gonna sound very general but treating myself to anything i want regardless of the repercussions it has on my wallet.

Tattoos? so many , if i listed them, they would take the entire post, (im basically covered in tattoos) but i can say that :

right arm has a "cute/beauty that can kill" theme

left arm is personal meaning/matching tattoos

right leg is gaming

left leg is witchy vibes

+ a flower in my ear and bongo cat under my tiddy

Favorite color? PORPOL. im in my lilac/lavender phase

Favorite types of music? I'm the kind of person to listen to a lot of genres, but soundtracks really hit the spot for me. I get carried on so easily by a good soundtrack, but otherwise i enjoy a good indie pop

Do you like puzzles? OH YEAH especially escape rooms, i had a phase last year and did like 10 of those. ngl i wanna go again, i miss those

Any phobias? spiders, i wanna like them but i cant i just cant

Favorite childhood sport? Soccer and artistic swimming, i was part of two sports clubs before moving out

Do you talk to yourself? Constantly

What movies do you adore? Emperor's new grove, in french canadian version specifically. comfort movie of all time

Coffee or tea? Coffee!! Bean juice makes me sleepy in big quantities but i find it so comforting, specially a caramel latte

First thing you wanted to be growing up? A singer safkhbsaglhabs;kfg

No pressure tags! but i would love to read up your infodumps uwu @danielsbackupglasses @communistfries @vixstarria @charmandabear

[elizaellwrites]

WIP Questionaire

Thank you @worldstogetlostin for tagging me here!

Rules: Answer as many (or as few) of the questions about your WIP as you can.

1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?

My ocs, but not all of them. They were part of a separate plotline that I abandoned quickly because it was terrible and cringy. Parts of them changed as they developed, but the core of their characters began here.

The originals are: Annamarie, Rachel, Jacob, Elaine, Jol (the daemon), and Natalie (Anna's mom)

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

I imagine it would be like the soundtracks I listen to while writing. These include songs from Narnia, HTTYD, Pirates of the Carribean, etc. I'm no composer, so I'd trust the judgment of the music expert on the case.

3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?

My automatic instinct is to jump to "all of them," but I'll be reasonable here and keep it brief because I could write an essay about each of them. I won't because a) that's ridiculous to do here, and b) a lot of this has to do with spoilers/stuff on the down-low. My Top 3 (these may be surprising or not) in no particular order are:

Seniar- He's more than Anna's dad, he's lived many lives and seen too much. He's a prince who stepped up to protect his people, defied expectations, and fell in love with a human, earned his place as a war hero, and did his best to protect and raise his daughter after everything he had known and cared for was destroyed in front of him. He might not be perfect, but he's dedicated his life to other people and still provides for his daughter despite carrying the burden of his past.

Roselle- The living dead, her existence shakes the very foundation of my other characters. After being introduced to the universe, nothing was the same, and it was all for the better. She also has this strange charm about her, like she demands attention. Her life and her death are quite possibly the 2nd and 3rd most influential factors in my entire plotline- only outdone by the destruction of Ariya. She's also on a team of her own with a willingness to overlook the rulebook, which makes her extremely fun to write.

Jacob- He's caring but distant at the same time, his family is a disaster, and he's a rule follower and a rule breaker all at once. He's an enigma and has been from the start. You think you know him, but do you really? He's always running from something, facing challenges like he's trying to prove something to himself. Him and his siblings are the driving force of a lot of plot lines, and for good reason. You just can't help but wonder whether he is a good person or a bad person, and maybe he's just both.

4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?

I'm honestly not 100% sure. My inspiration to write this WIP truly started with Percy Jackson, so there could be some crossover there. Really anyone with an interest in fantasy and okay with dark subjects could find it interesting.

5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?

Writer's block. Whether it's because a character wasn't connecting with the action the way I wanted them to, or if I'm having a day that everything I write isn't something I'm proud of... I'm in college and work, so there's often a lot on my mind, and stress and creativity don't flow well together in my brain.

6. Are there animals in your story? Talk about them!

Anna(marie) has a cat named Isa(belle) who she picked up while moving around with her father. Isa is a beautiful and sweet black Turkish Angora whose personality is modeled after my childhood cat Belle. She's not a major focus, but she means a lot to Anna as one of the few beings she could connect with outside of her father.

All other animals are wildlife and have to do with worldbuilding, which could go crazy, so I'll stop it there.

7. How do your characters get around? (ex. trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)

While on Earth and involved in traditionally human things, they travel in cars because their goal is to blend in and hide in plain sight.

In the list of natural (magic) Hecathian abilities, one of them is Teleportation. Characters with this ability, or in proximity to someone who is, travel this way. The challenge is it takes more energy the further you are traveling and needs quite a bit of practice and discipline to do it safely and correctly. A couple examples of characters with this power are Seniar, Annamarie (duh), and Jaleya (Cameron's sister).

8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?

Chapter 16- near the middle of book 1.

Not even close to where I want to end this.

9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?

I suppose the variety of aspects that appear. There is action, adventure, drama, complex characters and relationship dynamics, worldbuilding aspects, and the world and timeline just keeps expanding with different stories to tell. There's a lot to choose from, and it's all interconnected in the same universe.

10. What are your hopes for your wip?

I have a whole series planned, plus spin-offs and expanded stories to supplement it. I hope I have time to get through all of it because I want my main WIP and its world to someday be a complete set and no longer stuck only in my brain and scattered through thousands of notes.

Lightly tagging @my-cursed-prince, @willtheweaver, @jacqueswriteblrlibrary, @ashen-crest and anyone else who wants to tell me about their WIP!

[denimbex1986]

"It felt - I feel really proud of what those scenes are saying not only with the characters but also about like, what makes those scene works - what makes those scenes work in cinema in general."

"Yeah, we're really, really, really, really proud of them. We were just thinking about what way these particular characters - like it wasn't awash with, you know, thinking about representation or anything like that - we were just thinking about um, what the, how these guys would communicate with each other verbally and physically."

"Andrew was really, um, insistent that we, we shot at the Royal Vaux - Vauxhall Tavern and it really made a difference didn't it, because it was really authentic and it was populated by people - all the people that were in the thing were real people who frequent the, the RVT so that was really - "

" - one of my favourite days. We did two days there, right?"

"No, we did two days. Um, and it was brilliant. It was, it was fun; we had, you know, a bit of dance, they played the real music and um, uh, it was a really, really special thing. And people were telling us all different stories about, about, uh, you know, memories from the RVT and, you know those places actually really need to be protected, you know - because a lot of them are, are, you know, are genuinely at risk and um, you know, that's where people find their community, you know and um, can feel safe and all that kind of stuff. So um, I'm glad that it has this representation in our movie."

"The Drive soundtrack. Love that soundtrack."

"Um, again here he's stuck it on me. I like the, I like the soundtrack of 'La La Land.' I always play it when I'm in LA...you just wanna be in your feelings. We get that."

"Um, I didn't really feel like it was that big I suppose. I felt like her character was clear, really clear to me. I feel like she was a product of the time that she was born and raised in, and also her life was cut short, and so she hasn't had the benefit of growing with her son and, and learning as we all have since the 80s - which was a long time ago because I was born then. And yeah, no, I find the contradictions in people and the way people express themselves in different situations really fascinating and basically why I do the job so yeah, I've enjoyed those different approaches that she had yeah."

"Oh my God that's so hard. I need to - I did listen to a lot of Pet Shop Boys when I was preparing for the role and like, while we were shooting actually. I would maybe like it to be Madonna, but which one I do not know. But yeah, I'm going to - it's definitely going to be a female artist but who? Or maybe like Joan Baez or Joan Armatrading - one of those...I feel like she inside herself there's Madonna screaming to get out."