#like I seriously couldn’t give more of a fuck about lyanna

[chrkrose]

How do you feel claiming it's unfair that Lyanna isn't criticized like the others just because she is actually more important to the books than a woc? What's with you people and any girl who is actually important to the book and isn't woc. Lyanna may not be interested in your lame eyes but certainly in George's and the whole book. You people are pathetic with your hates.

She is associated

with magic

With Weriwood tree

With the promised prince

With Rhaegar Targaryen

With the rebellion

With Arya stark

With Arthur Dayne

With house Dayne

Not intersting?

You always turn it into how unfair it isn't a dark skinned girl.

It's not about this. Lyanna is just more important to the story. George made her so.

Lmao “gEoRgE mAdE hEr sO” yall think this is some kinda gotcha, it’s kinda funny tbh. And my favorite character of asoiaf is Brienne, she’s literally white, blue eyed and blonde, what are you on about WOC characters.

Just because Lyanna is as bland as stale bread TO ME, it doesn’t mean it is the end of the world. I know my opinion seems to be super important for whatever reason, but trust me: you can still stan Lyanna all you want, me not caring about her won’t change, so you might as well get on with your day and idk write some fics or create some art or whatever instead of camping in my asks trying to make me care about a character I don’t find interesting. Or do yall really need my validation so u can believe she’s everything you talked about and more? If you think she’s that important to the narrative, why are you yelling stomping your feet? Time for some self reflection there.

Yall are sounding like Stannis Reddit dudebros fans who cry every two hours about how Stannis is the GOAT of asoiaf and why isn’t he the ultimate fan favorite of everything ever made ever. I don’t caaaaaaare about Lyanna, or will I ever, so like… 🤷🏽‍♀️

[kinktae]

bitchin’ || pt. 2 (M)

↳ PART OF MY REWIND SERIES

The 80s were a time of choices. Which perm was right for you? What color neon would you wear next? None of these choices, however, were more questionable than a certain deal you made with Jeon Jungkook.

pairing: fratboy!jungkook x reader

word count: 4.4k

genre: 1980s au, eventual smut, e2l

warnings: multiple smut scenes, science talk, banter, jealousy, alcohol & LOTS of colorful 80s slang lmao

A/N: Bitchin’ is a multichapter fic, surprise!! This fic was inspired by To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before. Thank you to @junqkook for letting me use her likeness and helping me with Yara’s character overall. Hope you appreciate the easter egg based on her!

OFFICIAL PLAYLIST

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10

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PART TWO

"Yara!"

The eyes belonging to the girl in question, flashed your way, widening in alarm.

"Oh, yikes." Was her automatic response, her bag of cool ranch Doritos falling onto her lap.

You were angry, that much was evident to her. Yara was sat in your shared dorm's living room, a thick blanket engulfing her small frame. You briefly glanced towards the TV, it was tuned into MTV, the familiar music video of Every Breath You Take by The Police playing, before directing your glare back onto the copper-haired girl.

"Before you say anything," Yara began, swallowing down whatever remaining food was in her mouth, "you should know they were having a rerun of the VMAs – which I missed last night – at the same time as the lab."

"You left me alone! You said you would go to the lab yesterday!" You griped, crossing your arms over your chest.

"Yes, yes that is true but I would also like to point out the fact that Madonna performed, so it wasn't like I even had a choice when you really think about it." She countered, tone pitching comically.

"You absolutely had a choice!" You laughed, shaking your head.

"Mm... I could argue that it is a subjective opinion."

You walked over to your best friend, sighing as you slumped down beside her, placing your backpack onto the floor.

You offered Yara a sideways glance.

"Did Duran Duran at least win something?" You asked begrudgingly.

"Nothing. They were robbed!" She squinted, shaking a fist in the air angrily.

A small chuckle escaped you despite yourself.

"You really should have gone to the lab, you know." You reasoned, reaching into the bag of chips.

"And smell like frog insides for the rest of the day? Grody to the max." She responded, before flashing you a look. "No offense."

"None taken." You grumbled, her observation fully noted though.

"Besides the makeup lab is next week. What could I have possibly missed this class?" Yara dismissed you absentmindedly, turning back towards the television as she reached for another chip.

"Well." You chuckled nervously. "For one, I have a boyfriend now."

At your words, Yara froze, a chip still in her hand as she paused mid-bite.

"You what?!" She all but shrieked, causing you to jump.

"Who? How? When? Tell me everything!" Her hands found your shoulders, shaking you slightly. You shoved her off with a laugh.

"Uh, well, his name is Jungkook–"

"The Jeon Jungkook?! From our lab?" Yara interrupted, eyes wide and shining with interest.

"Um... yes?" You responded cautiously.

Yara let out a scoff, leaning back further into the couch.

"Unbelievable. I leave you alone for one day and you get a boyfriend! And a fine one at that. This is so bogus."

"Mine and Jungkook's whole relationship is bogus, Yara." You rolled your eyes.

At your words, your best friend raised an eyebrow and you took that as an invitation to continue speaking.

"I'm only pretending to date him to make his ex-girlfriend jealous."

A sharp laugh from Yara caused you to pause, watching the way her amusement was short-lived, her smile fell as she took in your serious expression.

"Oh, you're serious." She deadpanned.

You nodded, "When you didn't show up Jungkook ended up being my partner and... well, I'm still not sure how it happened but he basically offered to fund my STEM event in exchange for helping him making his girlfriend jealous."

"They are the weirdest couple." You breathed out, shoving another chip in your mouth.

"Wait... he's gonna fund your event?! Y/N, you've been planning that thing since we got to university!"

A smile found your face, your excitement once again seeing you.

"I know! I wouldn't usually get involved in someone's love life like this but was too good of an opportunity to turn down."

"Man, I'm so happy for you! Still kind of disappointed but happy nonetheless." Yara smiled, causing you to frown.

"Disappointed? Why are you disappointed?" You pressed.

Yara clicked her tongue at you, looking at you as if the reason should be obvious.

"What do you mean why am I disappointed? Here I was ecstatic to hear that my best friend has gotten a boyfriend only to find that it's got a contract behind it!"

You giggled, nudging your knee into hers. "Think of this as a smart business venture I'm embarking on."

Yara stared at you for a moment, something clearly weighing on her mind as her lips fell into a subtle pout.

"What?" You mused.

She fluttered her eyelashes, "Does this mean you aren't going to fuck him?"

Your eyes widened in disbelief.

"Yara!" You gaped.

"Because, if you want to get technical, you kind of have to so I can live vicariously through you. It's girl code." She continued, reaching over and popping another chip into her mouth.

You frowned. "That is gross and also not a thing."

"I'm serious, I'm not accepting anything less than, like, third base." Yara pressed with a wag of a finger.

"Why don't you worry about your own sexual escapades instead of worrying about mine." You paused before continuing. "Which won't be happening, for your information."

The snacking girl let out a deep groan, throwing her blanket off of her as she stood up, taking the bag of chips with her much to your dismay.

"Well, it's not my fault I'm not getting any, okay! So do us both a favor and freak his shit." She called out, walking over to the kitchen.

"Can you stop emphasizing your lack of dick for one second?" You chuckled. "If you're that desperate for dick go back to Eunwoo."

Eunwoo was a boy Yara messed around with last semester. The relationship was short-lived, Yara quick to cut things off as soon as she realized Eunwoo was looking for something more than just a brief fling. Because ironically, despite how Yara crowed about being lonely, there was nothing that sent that girl running faster than actual feelings.

"Sweetie, I'm desperate for good dick." Yara scoffed, having had emerged back into the room, her auburn hair now let down, her trusty scrunchy back around her wrist.

"Was Eunwoo really that bad in bed?" You wondered, eyeing your best friend curiously as she moved to turn off the TV that had gone neglected the moment you stepped into the room.

Yara shrugged. "No, he was fine."

"So...?"

An enthusiastic pound against the poor television box rang out, the soft side of Yara's fist having had slammed down dramatically.

"I don't want just fine, Y/N! I want dick so totally tubular that I feel it in my guts." She declared.

A sputtering cough fell from your lips as you choked on your inhale of air.

Yara looked at you with mild concern, suppressing her laughter as she walked over and began to pat your back.

"I seriously question how you wiggled your way into being my best friend." You breathed through your coughs,.

"Eat my shorts, Y/N. You love me and you know it." She dismissed easily.

You merely grinned, unable to dispute your best friend's claim.

"Now go shower." Yara ordered, using one hand to point in the direction of the bathroom, and the other to pinch her nose shut dramatically.

Sighing, you heaved yourself off the couch. You doubted you smelled as bad as Yara made you out to, but you couldn't deny that a shower sounded terrific right now.

"Yes, sir." You sent her a salute cheekily before turning to head to the bathroom, shaking your head as she called out after you.

"And when you come out I need to know every single word you and Jungkook exchanged. If you're dating him then so am I, bitch!"

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The weekend had breezed by quickly, homework and the newest Cyndi Lauper album occupying all your free time. You hardly had time to contemplate your new role as Jeon Jungkook's new girlfriend.

You and Yara had been in the midst of a conversation about what exactly she should get her little sister for her 13th birthday when you first spoke to Jungkook again.

"Cabbage patch kid?" Yara offered, causing your nose to scrunch up.

"How old do you think your sister is?"

"Hey, don't sass me. For your information, Lyanna still has all her Care Bear tapes. She threw a hissy fit when my mom tried to give them away last Christmas." Yara recalled.

"Still, she's becoming a teenager. I vote no on the cabbage patch kid."

"I'm with you, babe." Jungkook spoke up suddenly, lips pressed together as if in contemplative thought.

You hadn't even noticed him enter the classroom, much less approach and listen in onto your conversation.

"Jungkook!" You breathed out in surprise, stomach fluttering slightly as you realized what he had just called you.

"Why don't you get her a pair of roller skates?" He ignored you, placing a hand on the table and leaning onto it. You tried your hardest to ignore the way the muscles in his arm flexed with the movement.

You cleared your throat, "Roller skates?"

"Yeah. Every kid has to get a pair of roller skates. It's like a rite of passage."

"I never got roller skates…" You muttered.

"And you were robbed of a childhood." Jungkook informed you solemnly, causing you to roll your eyes.

"Sup." He said suddenly, eyes flickering to Yara as he offered her a casual nod.

You watched in amusement as a pink hue made its way onto your best friend's face, nodding back at him.

Seeing as Yara had remained silent this entire time, you realized it was probably best you introduce the two.

"Uh, Jungkook this is Yara, my best friend. Yara this is Jungkook, my... "

Business partner?

Temporary acquaintance?

"Her boyfriend." Jungkook finished for you cheekily, sending you a wink.

"Fake boyfriend." You reminded, causing Jungkook's eyes to widen.

"I don't know what you're talking about." He stated bluntly, eyes gesturing to Yara forcibly.

Oh. He thought you wouldn't tell your best friend about him? Hah.

"She already knows we're not actually dating–"

An angry shush came from the messy-haired boy, preventing you from talking further.

He hunched closer, eyes flickering across the classroom, "Keep it down, would ya? There are eyes everywhere."

"Sorry, jeez." You apologized dryly, raising a brow as you mimicked his motions.

"Bold of you to assume I won't be guiding Y/N throughout this entire arrangement." Yara spoke finally, her nose turned up slightly.

"Is that so?" Jungkook looked at her in surprise.

"Yep. In fact, I've self-appointed myself manager of your entire relationship." She replied smoothly.

Jungkook grinned, clearly finding humor in her words, "Well, then. With that kind of assertiveness, I'm sure we're in good hands. Nice to meet you, Yara."

"Likewise."

You frowned as your best friend and Jungkook shook hands.

"Anyway, as your manager, my first bit of advice for really selling this whole fake relationship thing is for the two of you to sit together. So if you'll just excuse me..."

At the sight of Yara reaching for her notebook and pen, alarm ran through you.

"Wha– Excuse me, what are you doing?" You protested immediately.

Jungkook, on the other hand, simply grinned. "Great advice!"

"Why thank you, I accept payment in cash and Annie Lennox cassette tapes."

"Yara, where are you even going?" You whined, watching as your best friend chucked her things into her bag.

"To sit at another table. Who am I to keep people in love apart? Jungkook you can take my seat."

Your shoulders slumped miserably as you watched as the smirking boy replaced Yara's spot on the stool beside you.

"Have fun, kids." She teased, waving the two of you off with a hand as she walked over to another table.

"I like her." Jungkook smiled cheesily.

"She's not kidding, you know." You warned. "If she says she's our manager then you better believe it. Whether you like it or not, she's gonna accomplish what she's set out to do."

"Reminds me of you." He replied with a hum.

You blinked in surprise.

"Was that... a compliment?"

"Was it?" His eyes went wide, voice pitched in feigned surprise.

A small laugh escaped you and before you could retort with your own sarcastic comment, your professor began to speak.

"Good afternoon, everyone. I hope you all had a good weekend." Mr. Kim greeted, his usual coffee mug in hand. He looked somewhat worse for wear, you noted. "I did. And as I sat here and reflected the choices I made Sunday night, I came to the conclusion that I will be sparing you the boring lecture this class and putting on a movie.

Widespread chatter of relief fell over the class, everyone elated to hear that this specific class would require minimal effort.

Mr. Kim had just sunk into the chair by his desk when a hand of a student shot up.

"Yes?" He answered.

The owner of the hand spoke up, "Should we take notes?"

Mr. Kim stared at the student with subtle bewilderment.

"I mean if you want? Guys, I'm gonna be honest with you all, I'm hungover as all hell. As long as you watch quietly and keep the lights off, I don't care what you do."

And with that, all the students turned back to chat amongst themselves.

It was funny, Jungkook thought, how easy you were to read when you thought no one was looking. He had been watching you through the corner of his eye, watching the way you hung onto the professor's every word and how disappointment washed over you when you realized there was no learning to be done today.

"Cute." He muttered to himself.

"What was that?" You replied absentmindedly, reaching for a sheet of paper.

Jungkook straightened in his seat, unaware he had said that out loud.

"Nothing."

You paid his reply no mind, however, pencil in hand as you began to write something onto a sheet of loose-leaf paper. Jungkook's head tilted in mild curiosity as he watched, wondering what it was you were doing.

To his surprise, the very paper of interest was then thrust his way, a soft sound ringing out as it rubbed against the cold surface of the lab table.

"What am I looking at?" Jungkook deadpanned. You shifted in your seat before responding.

"I think it's about time we talked seriously about this... relationship of ours. We need to establish rules."

Jungkook glanced back down at the paper.

"I see."

Suddenly, Jungkook's hand reached out for the zipper of his bag. You watched in silence as he pulled out the first writing utensil he could find – a blue marker – and jotted something down quickly.

You frowned, scooting your stool cautiously closer to him to get a proper look at the paper he had just written on.

"What is this?" You frowned.

"I believe it referred to legally as an amendment." He informed, eyes twinkling mischievously.

"Jungkook, I'm not going to kiss you."

Despite your seriousness, a smile nearly escape your lips at the sight of Jungkook's mouth falling into a pout.

"Why not?" He asked.

You raised a brow, "Um, we're not actually dating? Did you forget that?"

Jungkook let out a small noise of what you could only assume was indignation.

"Not to sound like a total douchebag but the fact that you don't want to kiss me is, like, totally insulting."

"I agreed to be your girlfriend, not some disposable pair of lips you're allowed to use whenever you need your ego stroked. Do I need to remind you that I hardly even know you?" You hissed lowly in case someone was listening in on your conversation.

For a moment it was just you and Jungkook glaring at each other. Neither of you was going to budge, he realized. He let out a sigh.

"Look, I see your point and what this is looking like but I promise you I'm not being creepy here. No one is gonna believe we're together if we don't kiss each other. To anyone that looks, you could just be my friend if we don't show some kind of affection towards each other."

Your arms crossed over your chest, your hard expression not letting up.

"One kiss. That's all I'm asking for. Just a peck, if that's all your comfortable with." He continued, causing you to hum.

He was certainly going to a lot of trouble just for one peck.

Maybe he did have a point. One kiss wouldn't kill you, would it?

"When?" Was your response, taking him by surprise.

"Uh... whenever? Preferably somewhere people will see. Maybe at the Halloween party this weekend?"

You frowned, a thought crossing your mind.

"You want me to kiss you at a party? In front of a bunch of people?"

"Well... not if you really don't want to..." Jungkook replied, suddenly feeling bad that you might really not be all that comfortable with this whole thing.

You shook your head, "No, it's not that."

Kissing Jungkook wasn't as daunting as the idea of doing it in front of a lot of people. It wasn't that you were socially awkward, per se, but the possibility of stage fright was undoubtedly a real one.

You let your thoughts run for a while before you finally came upon a slightly annoying solution. An audible sigh left you as you grabbed your pencil and reached for the paper.

"I don't want to embarrass myself." You told Jungkook bluntly as he read the contract's newest addition, your eyes fixated on the sheet as you couldn't find the courage to meet his eyes.

"So I want our first kiss to be somewhere private where I can make sure I know what I'm doing. Familiarize with... how you kiss... and stuff..." You trailed off, the warmth in your face suddenly too distracting to let you think intelligent thoughts.

Jungkook's eyes were as wide as saucers, glued to the side of your face as if trying to decipher whether or not you were being serious. He assumed you must be as the tone in your voice wasn't mocking in the slightest.

"Oh. Yeah, sure." He nodded quickly, still noticing the way you couldn't look him in the face.

A shit-eating grin found his face, "Y/N, are you embarrassed right now?"

"No." You stressed quickly, looking over at him defensively. Your eyes fell onto his lips against your better judgment and once again you turned away from his stare, heat rocketing through you. "I just don't want you thinking anything weird like this is me wanting to kiss you."

The dark-haired boy pressed his lips together.

"Trust me, you've made your opposition against kissing me abundantly clear." He told you pointedly before reaching for the contract. You watched him gratefully, thankful for the shift in interest.

"I'm serious about there being eyes everywhere. If Kiri finds out the truth, it's game over. I'd look like a total wastoid. Not to mention I'll never hear the end of it from my brothers." Jungkook told you, pushing the paper over for you to read. Tapping the end of your pencil against the table, you pondered something before scribbling else onto the rules.

"Fair." Jungkook expressed. "As long as you can guarantee she won't tell anyone."

"Yara is lonelier than Henry David Thoreau, you have nothing to worry about." You shrugged easily.

"I... have no idea who that is."

"He's a transcendentalist writer who spent two years in isolation–"

"Oh, so you're not just a science freak. You're a well-rounded nerd." Jungkook teased, causing you to scowl.

You grabbed your pencil. You could feel Jungkook lean to peer over your shoulder, laughing lightly as he took in what you wrote. No sooner had you finished, the paper was yanked from underneath your palm, your pretend lover quick to scribble back a response.

And that was how the two of you spent the next twenty minutes, discussing rules and filling the rest of the page, muffled exchanges of giggles catching the attention of students near you as they began to wonder could possibly be on that sheet of paper that had the two of you blushing and whispering like that.

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"Can I put my hand in your pocket?"

The request came seemingly out of nowhere. The class had just finished and Yara had passed by your table briefly only to insist that Jungkook walked you to your dorm, promptly informing you that she and you would not be walking back together as usual, before she left the room altogether.

You sent Jungkook a pointed look as the two of you exited the classroom and walked out into the hallway.

"What like in Sixteen Candles?" You presumed, throwing your bag over your shoulder. "Nice try scumbag, I'm not letting you cop a feel of my ass."

"Why do you assume everything I say has some sort of hidden motive behind it?" Jungkook scoffed. "I was trying to be romantic."

"Oh, really?" You asked, sounding skeptical.

"I mean, sure, getting to touch your ass would've been a nice perk..."

A pleasant laugh escaped you and Jungkook felt something in his chest tightened, and before he could think to warn you, his hand found yours.

You glanced down at the gesture, a shy expression finding you suddenly as you look back up Jungkook, eyes wide and face warm as he offered you a small smile.

"It's no hand in your back pocket but... this should still get the message across to everyone." Jungkook's fingers laced between yours and you tried your hardest to appear nonchalant as if your heart wasn't in your throat right now.

You simply nodded, continuing to walk alongside him as the two of you began your journey towards your dorm building.

It wasn't entirely awful, you found.

Jungkook's hand felt nice in yours. It was warm and soft– your ex wasn't one for PDA so you had always wondered what it might be like to walk around with someone you liked like this.

Shame your first time had to be with your fake boyfriend.

You hadn't realized how social Jungkook was until just now, however. It hadn't been more than a seven-minute walk but more than a handful of people had called out to Jungkook, offering him a greeting and a wave as they went about their days.

You had brought up his apparent popularity to Jungkook but he merely laughed the statement off, saying that it just came with the territory of being in a fraternity.

"Yara's gonna be so proud when she finds out we thought to hold hands all on our own." You brought up on the elevator ride up to your dorm.

The romantic embrace had been severed the moment the metal doors had closed on you two, no longer having an audience to perform for.

"She's quite the character that Yara girl." He noted.

You shrugged, "She's not too bad once you get used to her."

Jungkook shook his head as if you had miss understood him.

"I didn't say it was a bad thing. You're a lot like her, you know."

"Am I?" You raised an eyebrow.

Jungkook nodded, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Headstrong... passionate... won't take no for an answer... seems like the only person you two would listen to is each other."

You were surprised. Once again, it was a seemingly genuine compliment that had come out of nowhere and you weren't entirely sure how to respond. You clasped your hands behind your back, a grin washing onto you.

"Pretty sure you've got bigger balls than I do." He finished his thought, causing you to snort.

"Sorry if we challenge your manhood." You joked, nudging your shoulder into his just as the elevator door open. You slipped out onto the floor, Jungkook following behind you.

"Oh don't worry about that, babe. You two can test my manhood whenever you want." He told you greasily, a suggestive smirk on his face.

"If I weren't contractually obligated to be nice to you, I would smack you."

You reached the door of your dorm a few moments later, turning to Jungkook awkwardly.

"Well, thanks for walking me." You said.

Jungkook tucked his hand into the pocket of his jacket, shrugging coolly.

"I'll see you in class on Wednesday then."

As if on cue, the door of your dorm unlocked, swinging open enthusiastically, revealing a smiling Yara.

"Wrong. You'll be seeing her tomorrow." She stated matter-of-factly.

"I will?"

"He will?"

You and Jungkook both expressed your confusion in unison. An amused expression fell over Yara.

"I did some thinking on the walk back from class and decided that Jungkook is taking you out on a date tomorrow." She explained before turning towards the man in question. "When do you finish class tomorrow?"

"Uh... three o'clock?" He answered slowly, eyes flickering to yours to see if you had any idea what your best friend was talking about. You didn't, of course.

Yara tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Perfect, Y/N's last class is at two. Come pick her up here around four."

"Oh, uh, sure." Jungkook nodded, looking somewhat scared of the small but authoritative girl standing before him.

As if snapping back into reality, you shook your head. "Hold on, I didn't agree to this. Don't I get a say in this?"

Yara's eyes flickered towards yours dully, "No."

She clapped her hands together suddenly, directing her attention back to your pretend lover.

"Thanks for walking her over. We'll see you tomorrow at four. Don't be late, bye!" Yara sang sweetly, hand reaching out to wrap around your forearm.

You let out a yelp as you were tugged into the dorm, door slamming shut as you left behind a perplexed looking Jungkook.

"What the hell was that?! Why am I going on a date with him?"

Jungkook could hear your voice through the closed door, pitched angrily and clearly directed at Yara.

"Third base, Y/N. Don't make me say it again."

"I literally can't stand you."

A small laugh fell from the boy as he stood in his place in the hallway, eyebrows furrowing in amused bewilderment as he wondered how he ended up with not just one but two stubborn fake girlfriends.

[thecatsaesthetics]

Ashara's baby. The whole thing seems so weird to me. What do you make of it?

This is probably gonna be unpopular and let me say this I’m okay to be wrong. So many people write theories and act like they can’t be wrong. I’m fine if I’m wrong. Also, I don’t give a single fuck what the show did. The show to me will never define all the canon. As Martin said when answering if it was the correct ending yes… no…. yes…no. Meaning yes some things were probably “plot points” but just because the show didn’t go into certain things doesn’t mean it won’t matter in the books. So please no “BUT THE SHOW” cause I don’t believe everything has been revealed at all. 

I tend to think if Ashara’s baby is gonna pop up it will be Dany. I know a very very controversial opinion. But let’s look at Lemongate, which doesn’t prove Ashara but raises doubt on Dany’s parentage. Lemongate is undeniable, anyone who says otherwise is completely fooling themselves. 

Martin confirmed it’s important:  

Livejournal Question: “Dany remembers a lemon tree outside the house with the red door in Braavos, but citrus trees shouldn’t really grow in Braavos’s cold, foggy climate. Is this discrepency significant? Does it point to future revelations about Dany’s past? Thank you so much.” 

Answer: “Very perceptive of you. Yes, it does point to … well, that would be telling.” 

This means no matter what Lemongate matters. There is a reason Martin put it in the plot. Whether I am right or wrong doesn’t matter, Martin has confirmed it points to something. Something he will be revealing. So for anyone who claims Lemongate is nothing is wrong. 

Rhaella and Aerys infertility. Rhaella had Rhaegar, 3 miscarriages, 2 stillborns, and 3 short live children. There is obvious fertile issues with them and she has all of these losses under the best medical care. But we’re supposed to believe Rhaella gave birth to a healthy living child, without a maester, after an incredibly stress war, the loss of almost her entire family, flight to Dragonstone, and the constant fear of being caught by Robert Baratheon. 

Dany has violet eyes. People might not think this is important but it is. Viserys has lilac eyes and Rhaegar has indigo eyes. No keep in mind Martin is pretty much you get either “mom or dad’s traits.” recessive genes don’t seem to be a thing (the whole reason the “black of hair” nonsense drives some fans nuts). On top of that Dany is supposed to be the daughter of two generations worth of brother-sister marriages. These violet eyes are a mistake. Even Viserys points it out in Dany’s first chapter he makes her wear a purple dress to “bring out the purple in her eyes” Viserys is terrified she doesn’t look like a Targaryen Princess. But will get into that later. The only person in the timeline of Dany’s conception that had violet eyes was Ashara. Barristan Selmy even says Dany’s eyes remind him of Ashara. 

Back to the Viserys point. He is terrified she doesn’t look enough like a Targaryen. The first chapter is him dressing her up and trying to convince himself that she looks enough like a Targaryen. It’s the eyes that are worrying him probably, they are wrong. 

Viserys doesn’t speak High Valyrian but Dany does. When they speak with in front of the Dothraki they speak in The Common Tongue. We know Dany speaks High Valyrian, a language few would know where they were. So it seems like Viserys didn’t know High Valyrian.   

 Dany says she was born in the worst storm in Westerosi history. Not a single person has a memory of this storm, this storm that supposedly smashed the Targaryen fleet (leaving them defenseless) and made the stones at Dragonstone come down. This doesn’t make for many reasons. First Stannis has a naval battle at Dragonstone, Davos mentions that Stannis led the assault against Dragonstone which implies there was a battle. Furthermore, Dragonstone castle isn’t made out of stone, it’s made out of magically fused Valyrian stones. Dragonstone couldn’t crumble the way Dany said it did. On top of that Stannis, Davos, etc never mentions repairs made to Dragonstone. 

Further disproving the “stormborn” Dany claims the storm happened in the summer during her birth. Which doesn’t make sense, we know that winter/autumn storms are in The Narrow Sea with the worst being winter. 

Dany remembers Willem Darry as a “great grey bear” of a man and also that he died wasting away of sickness. He remembers Willem Darry never leaving his bed, and him walking with a cane. She remembers he had soft hands, but Willem Darry was a knight and master-of-arms. His hands would be rough.

Dany says she and Viserys were robbed when they left the house with the red door. Leaving them with nothing. But Dany also said that Viserys sold all there Targaryen treasures, including there mother’s crown. So the servants stole everything but just missed all that good Targaryen treasure? 

Dany tells us they went from Dragonstone-Braavos- Myr-Tyrosh-Qohor-Volantis-Lys-Pentos. Just look at a map. Tell me how this makes sense. On top of that Dany specifically says she remembers the flight from Dragonstone to Braavos. Dany was an infant apparently, how would she remember it? 

Dany says in her first chapter they lived in Pentos for 6 months, Illyrio says that the marriage between Drogo and Dany was “years in the making” and also mentions to Viserys not to ruin plans that have been in the works for “years”. 

And finally, Lemon trees don’t grow in Braavos. The smoking gun, Dany remembering a Lemon Tree outside her window: here is the specific quote 

“That was when they lived in Braavos, in the big house with the red door. Dany had her own room there, with a lemon tree outside her window” 

Now many have claimed it’s possible that they lived with the Sea Lord and that the Sea Lord had a glasshouse similar to the Starks. Now that’s possible, but Dany doesn’t remember a glasshouse. She remembers a Lemon Tree outside her window. If you look at the Sea Lord’s Palace it doesn’t seem like the room Dany would be in would be close enough for her to see the Lemon Tree. Also in The Stark glasshouse, it’s interesting that Lemon Trees aren’t grown. Considering Ned Stark had a daughter who loved lemon cakes. 

Lemon trees are most associated with Dorne. This has been repeated in the text a bunch of times. Similarly the idea that Braavos grows no lemon has also been mentioned. And as I mentioned in the first point Martin has said this issue will be brought up and revealed, and I’m sorry if I don’t believe Dany will have it revealed to her she once lived at a place with a glasshouse. I think it’s probably a little more.  

Now all of this is evidence that Dany’s past doesn’t add up. There are questions about it. There are many theories about it, but if Ashara’s baby is going to be important I would suspect it’s because she’s Dany. Now many have speculated Ashara’s baby is Aegon, it’s possible but I think it’s important that we’re told that Ashara’s baby was a stillborn girl. Also Ned’s guilt over the decision to kill Dany. Also, The Daynes hold Ned in such high respect despite him killing Arthur. It’s very odd. I mean Edric Dayne is nicknamed Ned… which seems to be for Ned Stark. There is something going on with The Daynes, I’m sure of that. I mean Barristan says when he looks at Dany it’s like he’s looking at Ashara’s daughter. So I think if anyone’s gonna be revealed to be Ashara’s baby it will be Dany. 

Now there are many baby daddies, Brandon, Ned, Aerys, Rhaegar… I still tend to think Dany is a Targaryen so I would throw out Brandon or Ned. I mean possible B+A=D, especially with the “looked to Stark” but idk I think Dany’s a Targaryen. 

Aerys is interesting Daenerys  Daen-erys Dayne-Aerys. Idk maybe the very name itself was meant to be a clue. Aerys was known to take mistresses, to be a rapist, etc. He was obsessed with Joanna Lannister for a while and Rhaella sent her away in order to protect her. It was said Aerys was interested in beautiful women and Ashara was supposedly the most beautiful of them all. Aerys would have had access to Ashara given she was his daughter in laws lady in waiting. Plus it was said someone “dishonored” Ashara at Harrenhall, Barristan claims. Who was known for dishonoring maidens? Aerys. 

Rhaegar is also a strong case, Rhaegar again had access to Ashara. It makes more sense for him to fall for his wife’s lady in waiting then Lyanna a woman he just met. Dany has strong ties to Rhaegar in the books, he’s mentioned so much in relation to Dany. Rhaegar being Dany’s father would make sense.  Again fits with the “dishonor” but I also argue it would fit with the “looked to Stark”. Let’s say Rhaegar and Ashara were having an affair, and then suddenly Lyanna showed up at Harrenhall and Rhaegar realized that only a child of “ice and fire” would be The Prince that was Promised. Is it possible Ashara took to the Starks in order to actively dishonor or humiliate them after being set aside for Lyanna? Again this is speculative but possible. We know she leaves Elia’s service soon after the birth of Aegon. It seems like she was set aside. 

So that’s it… again don’t take this too seriously. I’m okay if I’m wrong. I’m not someone set in stone when it comes to ASOIAF theories. But I just think The Daynes do have a role to play. 

[the-end-of-the-storm]

GoT 8x01: the wait is over and winter is definitely here - beware the spoilers below -

I just want to say beforehand that I woke up at 2.30 am to watch the new episode - so if this makes no sense at all, well ... let’s blame it on my sleep-deprived brain.

• Don’t know if we already knew this but they actually played the same song from the pilot when D*ny and Jon arrived and it made me a bit melancholic. It’s been a ride.

• The way Missandei eyes the Northerners watching her with distrust had me feel for her. However, watching it for the second time, it gave me another vibe too. As she was a slave, she knows exactly what it means to serve and obey someone you don’t want. So, if Missandei ends up urging D*ny at some point to leave the North be and just rule the other six kingdoms, well, I wouldn’t be surprised.

• Did you notice how happy D*ny was when her dragons intimidated the Northerners? It‘s been a while since I’ve seen her this happy:

This shot is Immediately followed by what has become her signature smug smirk that I dislike so much. Ships aside, a Queen worthy of the title shouldn’t have this kind of reaction to her children imposing fear on her newest subjects who she knows do already not like her all that much. This is like the dragon pit all over again, you know, when she was late to the meeting she demanded, and rode in on a dragon like she already owns the place, when it would have been so much smarter to be a little respectful and humble.

• The Jon and Bran reunion was nice; I suppose as nice at it can get with 3-eyed-Bran. Also, if Jon ever starts looking at D*ny like this, I‘ll start reevaluating him being part of the pack but not a heartbeat before:

• They made Sansa look THIS good for a reason. A sight for sore eyes, isn‘t it Jon?

(And yeah, this is her watching Jonny Boy.)

(And so is this.)

(Now, she’s too busy hugging her man. A smile on her lips and CLOSED eyes ... hmm. Do you see how her hands aren’t even attached to each other yet? Alright, let’s move on, shall we?)

• Lyanna Mormont is the Noorf in a nutshell and I’m here for her angry little girl attitude:

•Sansa isn’t here for chit chat with the saviour and whenever I think I couldn’t stan my girl more, I do. But I’m a bit afraid too, Sansa hates her new Queen amd D*ny KNOWS. 🔥

• Ok, I watched the meeting with the lords very carefully and I made some observations that I just want to throw in here for good measure: 1) D*ny is the last one to sit down at the Lord‘s table and it means things. 2) When poor little Lord Umber (who fucking deserved better!!) adressed Sansa an then Jon, we have them both in the frame, and no one else. However, when he adresses D*ny, we have her literally standing alone by the fireplace. 3) we have Jon and Sansa alone in a frame on 3 separate occasions, while we have only one shoot of Jon and the supposed love of his life alone (unless you count the one with D*ny and Jon‘s crotch ... then, well good for you, I guess). 4) Jon’s “It was the honor of my life.” fucked me the fuck up. You know, I was really afraid after the leaks that although I whole-heartily believe in Pol!Jon I would be miffed at him before it was officially revealed but I was soo wrong. This whole episode I felt so sad for Jon. He’s been through so much and willing to sacrifice everything he ever wanted to keep his people as safe as he can ... he deserves so much better than to be with the woman who took the honor of his life away from him without giving a single fuck about it. And yes, I did notice how Sansa glared at D*ny during this. Jon “I had a choice: keep the crown or protect the Noorf. I chose the Noorf.” I rest my case. 5) “If anyone survives the war to come, we’ll have Jon Snow to thank.” Right in front of D*ny; Tyrion, you brave, brave fool. 6) I think the leaks said, that neither Sansa nor D*ny said anything and I was very happy to find out that that wasn’t true. This is a very long scene, and D*ny only delivered us this little gem: Sansa: “What do dragons eat anyway?” (Which is a damn reasonable enquiry.) “D*ny: “Whatever they want.” 🔥 Maybe I’m overreacting things but this felt like a threat. Seriously, the Dark D*ny Force was strong in this one. They really went there ... wow. I mean it‘s not as if the food question wasn‘t legit. Also this whole the dragons *only* ate 17 goats and 11 of some-other-animal today is proof to me that the food thing is going to be huge. (Also, at first, I thought D*ny was worried that they eat too much when it was the other way around. LOL.)

• Tyrion: “Lady of Winterfell: has a nice ring to it.” Sansa: “So does Hand of the Queen; depends on the queen I suppose.” She really isn’t messing around, is she?

Also Sansa, same scene: “I used to think you are the cleverest man alive.” accompanied by her little judgy smile. She sure knows how to break a man’s heart.

• I’m crossing my fingers for D*ny to suggest to reactivate the Sansa/Tyrion marriage. Let’s be honest, Tyrion would be all for it in a heartbeat. She’s smarter, prettier and old enough that he wouldn’t feel like a creep anymore and now she actually is the Lady of Winterfell. He wanted her before - he must be drooling for her now.

• I was absolutely not disappointed with the Jon/Arya reunion. I thought - considering the circumstances - it was really cute and worthy.

• Arya: “She’s the smartest person I’ve ever met.” Stark sister feels. *-*

• Jon‘s „I'm her family, too.“ killed me a little bit inside. Man, my Jon feels are killing me right know. How can anyone see this and still claim that Jon will abandon his pack to become a Targaryen?

• When Sansa is the Queen of Shade, Cercei is the Queen of Smirk. I wonder if there’s anyway for Cercei to get out of this alive.

• Back to the food thing: it‘s been two years since S7, so thanks for the reminder that the Lannister army in the Field of Fire was people too, and were burned up like Sunday roast. 🔥

• I can’t believe that Yara is absolutely not pissed that D*ny couldn’t give less craps about her being abducted by Euron. even though without her Dany couldn’t have crossed the Narrow Sea.

• Alys Karstark, I see you and your red hair and your complete random appearance that served no plot purpose. Yet.

• Davos “What if the Seven Kingdoms (...) were ruled by a just woman and an honorable man.” I see what you did there, D&D. Also, if you guys are contemplating a J/D marriage, could you please have the decency and do it in front of Sansa? I need that. Thanks x

• If D&D wanted be to stop believing in Pol!Jon they shouldn’t have him happy-riding a dragon and kissing D*ny seconds after having her low-key threatening his sister. It’s just not believable that if this romance was real and between equals that he wouldn’t make it clear that she can’t threaten his family. Dany: “She doesn’t need to be my friend but I am her queen. If she can’t respect me ...” Jon: *then perish*

• Ok, but seriously D*ny, why would you give the guy you’ve just met and whose family and people despise you access to the the very things that gave you all your power? Why would you suggest dragon riding like it means nothing? Hop on, Jonny Boy. Just no. I have soo many questions. Why would you be so careless? (Arrogance, that’s why.)

• JON DOESN’T SAY “WE COULD STAY HERE FOR A THOUSAND YEARS.” But Pol!Jon replies with “We’d be pretty old.” giving no indication that that would be an enticing thought. No, he’d rather go back and fight some wights. Jon has a family he cares about and I don’t think she can relate at all.

•Rheagal is a creeper. Seriously, did you see the full on of him during the J/D snagging. Get a life, Rhaegal!

• I LOVED the Tent 2.0 Scene. Get my son some air. Also, while Jon talks serious stuff, Sansa’s like “No, she’s much prettier (than the Mad King).” with the same gaze she had when Littlefinger told her that a marriage alliance between J/D would make sense. I think it was the same weird voice too, but I’m not 100% sure right now. Jon really does reply nothing after Sansa questioning his motives for bending the knee and it tells me all I need to know.

• On this note, I want to repeat that I really need someone suggest a J/D marriage to Sansa.

• Sam finding out about his father and especially his brother broke my heart. It was everything I wanted and knew his reaction to be. And it was much worse to watch unfold than the leaks made it out to be. Especially since the scene started out really cute with Sam all nervous to be talking to them and cute about his book-stealing past and then he even tries to stay reasonable after hearing about his father but then he learns about his brother ... and it’s just too fucking much. Look at his face. I never ever cry during shows or movies but if I hadn't been prepared beforehand, I probably would have.

• Bran needs to stop staring at people in the courtyard. Just sayin’.

• Jon and Sam in the crypts. My poor babies. I don’t really want to say anything about their talk at this point because I believe in Jon and his agenda and if he needs to be detached to deal with keeping up the facade, then my man needs to do what he needs to do. However, I will be watching his next interaction with Sansa very closely. OK, to be honest, since I already had read the leaks before the episode, I was a little distracted during the parentage reveal and I couldn’t help but imagine Jon thinking “Well, this explains a fucking lot.”

• Last but not least: JAIME IS IN WINTERFELL!!!

My favorite moments:

- The Tarly Reveal

- Jon x Arya Reunion

- all Jonsa scenes

- Sansa and Tyrion on the battlements

On my threatened-to-be-burned watchlist:

🔥 Sansa Stark

🔥 Lyanna Mormont

🔥 Lord Varys

🔥 Samwell Tarly

🔥 Gendry Waters / Baratheon

🔥 JAIME LANNISTER (I have a hard time imagining Jaime to keep his mouth shut when he realizes that D*ny doesn’t just fry up soldiers in battle but that it’s her favorite method of conducting justice. There is too much history and PTSD between them, they’re like a time bomb; you can’t put them under one roof without at least threatening to set it off.)

All in all, this was such a good episode and I’m thrilled to see what’s to come. I’m so happy that Jon is still all I hoped for him to be inside and that Jonsa is still on track. I was even a little surprised at how they portrayed D*ny in this episode, because D&D aren’t even trying anymore, are they? I might be a little biased but I think if you’re not a full on stan there wasn’t much to root for her in this one. Anyways, everything within the episode fitted neatly with our Pol!Jon, Dark!D*ny and Jonsa theories and I couldn’t be happier about it.

Cheers xxx

[samwpmarleau]

for the fic meme: #21 with robb x rhaenys (jon being the best friend)

21. best friend’s sibling au

For this meme.

It’s not like he doesn’t know Jon has a half-sister. And it’s not like he ever thought it’d be impossible to meet her, given the givens. But he also hadn’t expected to be set up with her on a blind date.

He doesn’t recognize her at first when she walks into the restaurant, distracted as he is by her killer yellow dress that matches his tie–Alysane’s idea, to indicate who the other was–and the tumble of black curls pinned back by a silver barrette, a slightly nervous smile on her face.

I will never question your powers of matchmaking again, Aly, he thinks to himself. How could I be so lucky?

But then as she comes closer, she frowns. Like a popped balloon, it all implodes, right down to his realization that the shape of her nose is a mirror image of his cousin’s.

“Robb fucking Stark,” Rhaenys Targaryen curses in disbelief. “And here I thought my night was going to get better.”

Part of Robb wants to be offended that she’s so outwardly hostile; but, then again, were he in her shoes he probably wouldn’t react kindly either. Jon had said once that Aegon told him she hated their father perhaps more than even Jon, but clearly that doesn’t outweigh the desire to have nothing to do with anyone related to the girl said father had romanced.

The whole debacle wasn’t his aunt’s fault, he knows that, and he wagers Rhaenys knows that, but anger isn’t always reasonable. Just because Aunt Lyanna hadn’t been aware that Rhaegar Targaryen was married with two children must not lessen the sting, and it’s surely far easier to actively resent a woman you’ve never met than your own father.

“Well, hang on,” Robb hastens without thinking. “We already have the reservation, and I’m starving.”

“Eat to your heart’s content. There’s no way I’m staying on this date with you. I’m also going to kill Aly.”

“She didn’t know about our families’ history.”

“Even so,” Rhaenys says, looking him up and down, “I can’t believe she’d think we’re compatible.”

“What is it you think makes us incompatible?” Robb asks, not entirely positive why he’s objecting. “You don’t know anything about me, nor do I know anything about you. Other than the obvious.”

“‘The obvious’ isn’t enough?”

“Neither of us played any part in it. I don’t see why that should be a dealbreaker.”

“Because I’m not going to date the nephew of the woman my father cheated with!” Rhaenys hisses. “You’re delusional.”

Before Robb can come up with another rebuttal, Rhaenys summarily turns on her heel and strides out of the restaurant, leaving him to explain to the waitress that no, he won’t be needing the table after all.

“So how’d it go?” Alysane asks him the next day. “Go ahead, tell me I was spot on.”

“Actually, she didn’t like me at all.” It would be kinder to lie, but he sincerely doubts Rhaenys would refrain from doing the same if questioned.

“What?” Alysane asks, crestfallen. “That’s impossible. I’ve never been surer of anything.”

“I don’t know what to tell you. Sorry, Aly, it just didn’t work out. You could always just set me up with someone else.”

“No,” says Alysane, “I’m getting to the bottom of this.”

She doesn’t bug him about it again that day, but when he gets back to the dorm, the discussion renews on a different front. “Did you seriously go on a date with my half-sister?” Jon demands as soon as he gets in the door. “You have got to be kidding.”

“How did you–”

“Alysane asked me about you,” he says. “She wanted to know if there was something going on that would make you sabotage a, and I quote, ‘perfectly wonderful date.’ What the fuck, Robb?”

“Chill out,” says Robb, setting down his backpack. “First of all, it was a blind date, so you can blame Aly for that. Secondly, it didn’t go anywhere. Rhaenys made sure of that.”

“Rhaenys did?” Jon asks, eyes narrowing. “Not you?”

“I mean, I did, too, obviously. Rhaenys was just more forceful about it, that’s all,” Robb says, wincing.

“Okay, good. Because the prospect of you two getting together is the worst.”

“Don’t worry, even if I wanted to–which I don’t–I’m pretty sure she’d rather gouge her eyes out than date me.”

“I guess she does have that going for her.” Jon looks sufficiently mollified, and Robb counts it as a win that he has avoided homicide-by-cousin. For now.

He manages to mostly forget about the date-that-wasn’t. With finals approaching, romance hasn’t remotely been on his mind anyway. Presently, irritation is at the forefront–he needs precisely one more book to research his term paper, and it’s not where it’s supposed to be.

“I’m looking for this but I couldn’t find it,” he says to the work study librarian’s assistant, handing her a slip of paper with the title. “Kinda urgent.”

The assistant regards him with a look of sympathy. “Sorry, man. Someone else just checked it out.”

“Really?” he asks. “You don’t have another copy?”

“No, sorry,” she says. “But the one who borrowed it is sitting over there, maybe you can work out an arrangement.”

He thanks her and, not feeling very optimistic, walks over to the indicated table, where a woman is hunched over the book in question, thick dark hair tied in a haphazard ponytail.

“Excuse me,” Robb says, “but I was wondering if we could share this book, because–”

His voice trails off as the woman looks up at him. What are the odds? he despairs.

Rhaenys’s face contorts into distaste just as it did months ago, but it’s tempered this time by what is clearly dead week fatigue. “Not a chance. I have a term paper due for–”

“Dr. Pycelle’s class? Yeah, me too,” he interrupts. “Listen, I don’t want to fight, or even talk at all really, I just want to survive this semester. Please?”

“You’re actually in his class?” she asks skeptically.

“Tuesday-Thursday section, longest syllabus I’ve ever seen.” For proof, he reaches into his bag, grabs said syllabus, and drops it on her laptop.

Rhaenys deliberates, then finally nods towards the opposite side of the table. “Fine.” She pushes his syllabus back to him and adds, “Only because Pycelle’s a total prick who wants to see people fail and I’d love nothing more than for him to be wrong.”

“I’m surprised you don’t want to see me fail,” says Robb, taking a seat. “Doesn’t seem very on-brand for you, given our last encounter.”

“You underestimate my capacity for spite,” she answers. “Pycelle is more relevant at the moment than family bullshit.”

“Well, thanks anyway.”

“Whatever.”

The situation works better than he thought it would: they don’t talk other than to trade off with the book, let out a curse of frustration, or bounce the occasional question off the other. Even though it’s not really a truce, it feels like one.

He also finds that as the night wears on and his sleep-deprived mind lapses, he sneaks more and more glances at her.

She looks atrocious, in all honesty, face blotchy from lack of rest and no makeup, bags beneath her eyes, an old sweatshirt that had definitely seen better days, a habit of pen-chewing. But somehow, it’s endearing, if he ignores how she’d been at their botched dinner date.

She’s Jon’s sister, he has to remind himself. Jon, who would murder you if he found out you were ogling her.

Half-sister, and it’s not ogling, it’s appreciating, he argues. I’m only human.

“Are you done? I’m done,” Rhaenys announces, closing her laptop with a satisfied snap.

It brings Robb out of his…appreciation. “Yeah, same. Might be my best paper yet.”

He reaches for the book to give her to return, at the same time she too goes to grab it. Their fingers brush on the spine. Robb doesn’t believe in otherworldliness, but there’s definitely something when they touch, and he knows he isn’t imagining the look of near-vulnerability in her eyes as she looks from their hands then back to him.

He pulls his away before she can demand him to, and then takes his sweet time packing up his belongings while she slides the book into the return box.

“Do you live on campus?” he asks. “I mean, did you drive here?”

“Drive here? I don’t even own a car,” she says. “No, I’m at Sunspear Hall.”

He’s never been inside that dorm, but he does know it’s all the way across campus. “Let me walk you,” he says. “My parents would have a field day if I don’t.”

He fully expects a refusal that would then lead to another argument when he insisted, but instead Rhaenys simply readjusts her backpack and says, “All right then.”

[janiedean]

i don't get why Jon is considered a threat to Dany's throne when they could just get married? obvs they like each other, and they have targ blood to excuse the close relation

... it’s not that he’s considered, it’s that he is just by existing and that is set up to be the main conflict in the ‘good guys’ side - how it’s resolved is another issue, but like... it’s not that they like each other or not, it’s a question of plot elements and setting.

meaning (guys I wanna be objective here, don’t take this as me hating on d/any or anything because I’m not this is just how I feel they shaped up the narrative):

all of dany’s storyline relies heavily on a few key elements both in book and show, as in: a) she’s the last surviving targaryen and no other, b) she feels that the iron throne is her birth legacy as the rebellion wasn’t legitimate/the targs were the legitimate rulers, c) her entire claim on the iron throne relies on recognizing the targs as legit rulers and on the fact that *she* is the last targaryen left;

and as she put it herself in S7, she has bled and suffered for it - now, dany’s character development in S7 (development) was realizing that she actually cared about fighting the white walkers and helping her allies more than her throne for now at least, which is why jon kneeled when she didn’t ask for it (and I’d like to put forward that I actually get that and I don’t think he did something abysmally stupid from his POV) and that was when they tried to sell us the romance angle (which imvho is very badly written and had endless pacing issues but never mind, I’m not going to question jon/erys’s status - it happened, I’m accepting it);

now, as goddamned fucking stupid was the whole ‘JON’S REAL TARG NAME IS AEGON’ writing decision - because that was fucking stupid, even if the show cut off the aegon+joncon storyline aegon still existed within canon, he’s just dead, so rhaegar naming both his male heirs with the same name is dumb as fuck and makes no sense but never mind that -, it should give you red flags that they mean for jon to take on some of the original aegon vi’s storyline in the book because ofc they couldn’t have two possible targaryens alive but nvm;

now: aegon vi book-wise is a legitimate threat to dany’s claim unless he marries her, since he’s rhaegar’s trueborn male heir which immediately makes his claim better than dany’s and when he realized he didn’t want to wait around for her he went to take westeros for himself or tried to - and okay, dany’s about unaware of that rn because she has more pressing concerns, but the existence of a male targaryen heir who is legitimate automatically puts a dent in *her* claim to the throne;

now, do I have to believe that they renamed jon aegon for nothing and gone through the pains of making us know for sure that rhaegar married lyanna and that he’s *trueborn* (ngl I think it’s also book canon except that I don’t think rhaegar disinherited elia’s children, he prob. just married lyanna without divorcing elia) for it to end up in nothing especially when they already set it up in s5 with that speech to theon about being both stark and greyjoy which was obviously foreshadowing for his future conflict about being both stark and targaryen?

I don’t think so.

now, what I want to get at with my theorizing is (VAGUE SPOILERS THAT I KNOW OF ARE MENTIONED BUT IT’S VAGUE AND I DIDN’T VERIFY):

this season they have six episodes - long ones, but still six. given that the last one is gonna be mostly epic battle/finale stuff and from the five spoilers I know there’s another one towards the middle. This means there’s roughly four episodes of Other Stuff Left and honestly, there has to be a conflict somewhere or the narrative doesn’t go on;

last season tied up the house stark stuff in the sense that as badly written as it was, LF is out of the way, sansa/arya/bran are on the same side again (regardless of how shitty bran’s written but nvm) and pretty much signed off cersei’s political suicide because she has tied her survival to euron bringing her the golden company but theon is obviously offing euron to get back his sister and taking that from her and that’s gonna happen early on, so like.... she’s basically dragging dead narrative weight while going around king’s landing and I seriously doubt she’s surviving midseason, and on top of that there’s no conflict to be had in KL with the fact that she’s the only valuable main player still there, everyone else has left;

we of course have the question of WHAT WILL JAIME DO but that spoiler pic pretty much solved it - he’s going around wearing robb’s old armor or an armor that looks like robb’s, everything points to a confrontation with bran + resolution of issues that brings to him pledging with the starks - the starks, not dany;

at that point there’s literally no other major - major - conflict left to explore that doesn’t touch the question of Who Is Getting That Throne And How It Fits With The Current Situation;

now: taking for granted that jon/erys like each other and they’re most likely in honeymoon phase when they get to WF, the point is that a) they don’t know they’re related, b) he thinks she’s a trueborn queen and he’s only there because people elected him and she thinks he’s an illegitimate son with good skills and good morals. now, while she probably wouldn’t give two fucks about bedding a relative if she thought she’d marry viserys growing up and IT’S TARGARYENS, he might find it a tad more objectionable since he was not brought up with the idea that marrying your relatives was acceptable outside of targaryens (guys incest is a taboo in westeros too) and telling him he’s r’s son won’t magically change his attitude in that sense, so that is one conflict in itself...

guys: jon’s mere existence is a threat to dany’s claim. even if he doesn’t do anything about it and he assures her he can’t care less, he’s still her brother’s trueborn legitimate MALE offspring who not only has targ blood on one side, but has *stark* blood on the other side, and given that the north has tried to secede for the entire series and that he has both stark and targ heritage (guys...... again, a song of ice and fire = a song of jon snow), even if he doesn’t care, other people could see him as a better option than daenerys because he’s from westeros, he knows the customs, he has good military experience that doesn’t rely on dragons to win battles and they’d trust him way more than an outsider who has never been to westeros and comes back reclaiming it because it’s her birthright and who doesn’t abide by westerosi customs - and mind that the tarlys being burned alive when they could have gone to the wall was exactly to make that point. like, it’s the same issue catelyn had with him - regardless of whether he would have wanted to usurp his siblings (we know he wouldn’t have, she didn’t), ned having a supposed *male* son who looked like him and was robb’s age while all her male children looked like her and not like ned was in itself a threat to her children and their inheritance, which is 60% of the reasons why cat hated jon (the other 40% being that she thought ned betrayed her not even a year after they married);

like, that’s an issue that would only get solved if they marry and have children and she chooses to trust him to not make a coup, but even with that... a jon/erys marriage as things are now (with jon being kitn and ned’s bastard son as far as people know) would make her the most important part of it and he’d be more of a consort than king, but with jon being rhaegar’s, either he has the title or they share it equally;

now: dany has to have character development. everyone has to or shit doesn’t happen. jon’s main issue is gonna be reconciling stark and targ heritage (and tbqh I don’t see jon embracing the targ part so readily - guys he’s wanted to be a stark all his life and he grew up with them, let’s be real). dany is obviously going to revolve around the following points at least imvho:a) how is she going to react finding out that she’s not the last targaryen left?b) how is she going to react finding out that the other targaryen around has a better claim than her/has her same birthright?c) can she get used to westeros’s culture/customs and learn them if she has to be queen?d) can she bend her own principles and compromise enough to realize that she can’t rule just through dragons because you might *conquer* with them but you can’t *rule* with them as we’ve seen with the tarlys?now, all of that is obv. up in the air and I have no issues whether it goes left or right - honestly it’s so far in my scale of ‘stuff I care for in this show’ that as long as I see jaime in robb’s armor all the time I’ll be fine, but...

tldr: if the answer to those questions is, in order, ‘she’ll take it well, she’ll vouch for sharing power and it won’t impact on their relationship, yes and yes’ then congrats, we have positive character development and most likely canon targ restoration with jon/erys as endgame. if the answer is ‘she’ll take it badly, she’ll see jon as a potential threat regardless and demand that he renounce it or smth, no and no’, then congratulations, we have negative character development and the conflict turns from dany + starks allied against the white walkers and cersei to a dynasty conflict during which people will have to take sides and in that context tyrion would be caught in the middle because he’s dany’s advisor but on the other side there’s people he genuinely likes/he’s friendly with, the whole question of his marriage to sansa and his damned brother, so he’d have to pick sides in that sense; 

now, it could also be that the answer is no but then she changes her mind and we still have positive character development after the negative - possibly, she’s a main so she’ll get screentime same as jon - but like, that is imo the most obvious and glaring plot conflict that has to come out of what they wrote until now regardless of whether it’s good or bad writing. and fine, it’s been bad lately, but nvm that, the outcome has to be one regardless of how they get there.

like: I don’t doubt that there can be a positive resolution, but there has to be conflict or nothing happens this season if the jon parentage reveal ends in ‘ah well we can just get married in episode two’, and given dany’s in-text character faults that she has same as everyone else (more or less, given how the show’s written), this one plot point is going to have weight and it’s going to create conflict for her because it basically dismantles the entirety of her claim on the throne that she’s brought on since the end of S1 and it’s too narratively important to dismiss it on account of ‘they like each other and they can just get married’. they can, but at the end, not at the beginning, and she has to fully confront it and come out stronger for it if you want a positive development and not further stagnation.

thanks for coming to my speculation ted talk *shrug* XD

[leviloviatar]

You literally understand these characters so much i love it. It’s by no means a matter of course esp with this crap show that butchers Arya and Gendry’s characters (and bran too :(() but what are your favourite character traits of Gendry? And in what ways are Robert and Gendry similar and different?

OK YOU GUYS I AM EXCITED

First of all anon thank you so much!!! Not only was I blessed with this amazing ask, but I also got this similar one:

You’re active again omg I love your blog and your gendrya posts :D so I wanted to ask in which ways Gendry and Robert are similar and in which ways are they different? I think he is kind of a mixture between Robert and Stannis

I don’t know what I did to deserve my asks to blessed with these amazing anons but I LOVE YOU and since you both just happened to ask me about one of my favorite subjects of all time…*cracks knuckles* 

Let’s talk about some burly, beautiful, Baratheon boys, shall we?

So the most glaringly obvious similarity between Gendry and Robert has got to be the “Baratheon Look,” right? GRRM takes great pains to remind us, time and time again, that Gendry looks like Robert. They both have the classic Baratheon features - tall with dreamy blue eyes, thick black hair, and very big muscles. 

*Its important to remember, that although when we first meet Robert Baratheon he’s gotten old and fat, back in his day he was a damn fine looking man.

Fifteen years past, when they had ridden forth to win a throne, the Lord of Storm’s End had been clean-shaven, clear-eyed, and muscled like a maiden’s fantasy. Six and a half feet tall, he towered over lesser men, and when he donned his armor and the great antlered helmet of his House, he became a veritable giant. He’d had a giant’s strength too, his weapon of choice a spiked iron warhammer that Ned could scarcely lift. In those days, the smell of leather and blood had clung to him like perfume.-AGOT, Eddard I

For reference as to how ripped Robert was, Ned Stark, who wields a two-handed broadsword (note: that’s really fucking heavy) can barely even lift the warhammer Robert is swinging around…Robert was ripped. 

Speaking of hammers, Gendry has literally grown up swinging a hammer (albeit around a forge) but remember when Tohbo Mott tells Ned that Gendry was made to swing a hammer? And since we now have show!Gendry swinging a warhammer, I have high hopes that book!Gendry will also follow in Robert’s footsteps as to his weapon of choice. In case all that hammer imagery doesn’t hit hard enough (pun intended and also I’m so sorry lol) GRRM is constantly reminding us that Gendry looks like Robert. I mean, when Ned first discovers Gendry, the reader is given the literary equivalent of a big blinking neon sign that says ‘hey look at this kid, he looks just like King Robert’ - 

The master called over a tall lad about Robb’s age, his arms and chest corded with muscle. “This is Lord Stark, the new Hand of the King,” he told him as the boy looked at Ned through sullen blue eyes and pushed back sweat-soaked hair with his fingers. Thick hair, shaggy and unkempt and black as ink. The shadow of a new beard darkened his jaw.-AGOT, Eddard VI

And just so we seriously don’t forget, there are plenty of reminders throughout the books that hey, this guy really looks like a Baratheon.  For example:

Strands of thick black hair, still wet from the bathhouse, fell across his deep blue eyes. - ACOK, Arya II

When she spied Gendry, his bare chest was slick with sweat, but the blue eyes under the heavy black hair had the stubborn look she remembered. -ACOK, Arya VIII

Remember when Brienne first sees Gendry, and for a second she thinks its Renly?  (AFFC, Brienne VII, I think?) Well, despite his inconsistent eye color…“Renly was handsome as Robert had been handsome; long of limb and broad of shoulder, with the same coal-black hair, fine and straight, the same deep blue eyes, the same easy smile.” (-ACOK, Catelyn II).

Another thing Gendry shares with Robert is a bit of that famous Baratheon temper. “Ours is the Fury” are the house words, after all. This is especially true of Robert, who is a bit infamous for his “fury,” and we see his temper quite often. For example:

“Gods,” the king swore, the word exploding out of him as if he could barely contain his fury. -AGOT, Eddard VIII

and with the king in such a black fury … -AGOT, Eddard VIII

Robert was in a fury, until he heard talk of some monstrous boar deeper in the forest. - AGOT, Eddard XII

Robert Baratheon’s fury had soured the ironmen’s taste for the new gods, it would seem. - ACOK, Theon I

This is also the man who, despite already having killed Rhaegar Targaryen, still dreams about killing him every single night of his life. Have you ever been so angry at something that after you’ve smashed it to bits, you still want to smash it? Robert Baratheon has. But for me, the very worst example of his temper that we see as readers is when he slaps Cersei, and then threatens to do it again (I feel like the fact that Robert feels guilty about this says a lot about his inability to control his temper, more on that in a sec). Point is, Robert has a bad temper. 

But we also see traces of this famous ‘Baratheon fury’ in Gendry. Although it mostly surfaces as his stubbornness (oh hi Stannis), we do get to see instances of Gendry’s temper getting the better of him (my personal favorite being the Peach, but also see jealous!Gendry). But the important thing is, that Gendry is able to control his temper much more effectively than Robert. This is most likely due to the fact that he has to. Robert is the king, he can do whatever he wants with no consequences. But Gendry? A lowborn bastard with no money or connections? Yeah, he can’t go around doing that. Losing his temper could also mean losing his life, no matter how strong he his, because of his position in society, which brings me to the most important part about these two which is their Big Differences: 

Robert is the legitimate son and heir of a wealthy and powerful noble family

Gendry is a very poor, lowborn bastard with no family

Robert was an infamous womanizer who fathered many bastard children

Gendry is a blushing virgin who only has eyes for Arya Stark and would literally never touch another woman ever fight me

I feel like Robert and Gendry are sort of like a case study in nurture vs. nature. Despite their many genetic similarities, their vastly different socioeconomic environments shaped them in very different ways. Robert grew up as the eldest son of a Great House - he lived in a castle, knowing that he would inherit that castle, and all the lands, titles, and privileges that come along with it; other lords owed him allegiance; he was wealthy, powerful, and on top of that, he was good at everything he did (much to the chagrin of his younger brother Stannis). He wasn’t just any lord, but the Lord of Storm’s End, a very important position in society, and then he went on to become the fucking King, arguably the most important person in society. So what does he do with all his money and power? 

Robert Baratheon had always been a man of huge appetites, a man who knew how to take his pleasures -AGOT, Eddard I.

And what does Robert have an appetite for? In his own words: “warring and whoring, that’s what I was made for.” - Robert to Ned, AGOT, Eddard VII. Drinking, fucking, fighting, that’s what he likes. (We could talk about how much of that is actually a coping mechanism but let’s save psychoanalyzing Robert’s actions for another, crazier post lol).

Gendry being both a lowborn and a bastard is crucial in shaping the man that he becomes. Gendry grew up in essentially the exact opposite circumstances that Robert did. Not only was he lowborn and extremely poor, but he had to live with the added stigma of being a bastard (and an ‘unrecognized’ bastard at that, which we see in ASOIAF is very different than being a ‘recognized’ bastard). As we know, being a bastard is something that Gendry is painfully aware of. (Unlike Robert, who doesn’t seem to give a single fuck how many bastards he leaves behind). Gendry hates the father he never knew. And on top of that, his opinion of Robert is pretty damn low as well…

“That old drunk?“ said Gendry scornfully. “He’s dead, some boar killed him, everyone knows that.” - ASOS, Arya II

I think the reason Gendry doesn’t have the inclination to abuse alcohol or women in the way Robert did because this is the world he was born and raised in. Gendry could never afford to be the womanizing drunk his father was.  Of course, I’m not saying that if Gendry had the same upbringing as Robert then he definitely would have turned out the same - maybe, maybe not. I’m merely saying that the possibility of becoming someone like that doesn’t exist for Gendry. This is someone at the very bottom of the social ladder, someone with no money to spend in taverns or brothels. Actually, even engaging in consensual sex would be pretty risky for Gendry, because it could lead to huge ramifications, for example, fathering a bastard he couldn’t afford to care for, or pissing off the wrong father or brother. Stepping out of line could literally mean his life, since someone like Gendry could be killed in the slums of Flea Bottom with literally no ramifications. 

To me, this is also what makes Acorn Hall such a big fucking deal - Gendry Waters pulling Arya Stark down to the floor and rolling around with her like that is BOLD AF and Gendry knows that. It’s one of the main reasons I squeal every time I read it. I really do think there’s a very Baratheon-like part of him that comes out, especially where she is concerned. Speaking of which, Gendry and Robert both have remarkably similar (excellent) taste in women - all those Arya/Lyanna parallels aren’t there for no reason!

Another interesting parallel between Robert and Gendry is their experiences with war. Robert loved war. I mean he really loved war. He was good at it. It made him feel exhilarated. And most importantly, the horrors of war didn’t really impact him because he was part of the aristocracy. Gendry’s journey, by stark contrast, has literally taken him through the devastating impacts of war on the common people. He has seen the worst of it - the myriad of ways that wars waged by the nobility literally destroys the people those lords are supposed to be protecting. In my opinion, these experiences are exactly what would make him a good king, not only better than Robert, but also better than Stannis or Renly, because Gendry understands on a very real level the suffering of the people. 

(Personally, I would love to have more about the young!Baratheons, like growing up at Storms End together, and see how their personalities developed into the men they became. If this is a fic, somebody link me!) 

Ok so I’m really gonna wrap this up now before it becomes so long that no one ever leaves me asks again, but remember what Donal Noye said about the Baratheon brothers?

“Robert was the true steel. Stannis is pure iron, black and hard and strong, yes, but brittle, the way iron gets. He’ll break before he bends. And Renly, that one, he’s copper, bright and shiny, pretty to look at but not worth all that much at the end of the day.”

Well, I know I’ve said this before but I think Gendry is Valyrian Steel. He was forged differently from the others, but because of that he is uncommonly strong, sharp, and exceptionally valuable.

[maddie-grove]

The Stark Romance Saga--Book #4: The Maiden of the Riverlands

Previous Installments: Loved I Not Honor More (Book #1, Robb Stark/Jeyne Westerling), The Iron Scoundrel (Book #2, Theon Greyjoy/Asha “Not His Sister in This Universe” Harlaw), Kissing the Kingslayer (Book #2.5, Catelyn Stark/Jaime Lannister), A Fire in Winter (Book #3, Jon Snow/Ygritte), and The Winter Bride (Book #3.5, Samwell Tarly/Gilly).

Note: This installment takes place roughly four years after the end of Sam’s book, which takes place about a year after the end of Jon’s book. Westeros is making progress, albeit slow, in its war against the White Walkers, and there has been a rather cool, brief spring and summer in the meantime. Queen Daenerys is on the throne, although she’s reached a Dornish compromise with the North, making it a principality. Dany’s doing a fine job on the whole, although she’s met with some difficulties, and has a reputation as a fair and kind ruler despite the whole dragon thing.

Other Note: I made Lord Londrew Frey up, because I have no idea which Frey would inherit the Twins after the foiled Red Wedding in Robb’s book. My other thought was making it Big Walder Frey; however, I have a soft spot for that little guy. He may be disturbingly casual about cousin-murder, but he has standards!

The Style

Sweet, drama-filled, and slightly off-kilter 1990s Patricia Gaffney or Susan Wiggs.

The Leads

Nymeria of High Heart (Nan for short), 20 years old, a folk heroine of the Riverlands. With her sword-fighting skills and the help of her direwolf, Sharra, she defends the poor, the weak, and the unprotected from unscrupulous outlaws and cruel lords alike. Dwells in a makeshift cottage near High Heart with only Sharra for company, living partly off the land and partly off the gifts of thankful Riverlanders. Has many friends, including the Brotherhood without Banners, but won’t get too close to anyone. Can’t remember anything before she was fourteen and found herself on the back of a wagon to Castle Black, disguised as a boy. It hurts too much to think about that time, so she’s resolved not to wonder about her past. Really, of course, ARYA STARK.

Gendry, 25 years old, a blacksmith at the inn-turned-orphanage at the crossroads and a member of the Brotherhood without Banners. Less angry than his canon counterpart due to improved circumstances, but still grumpy. An orphan from King’s Landing, he was apprenticed to a blacksmith who abruptly packed him off to join the Night’s Watch. Upset by his master’s rejection and embittered by the atrocities he witnessed in the Riverlands, he found a sense of belonging with the Brotherhood and with the kids who frequently mob him at work. Lately, though, he’s beginning to wonder if he should want more from life. Good friends with Nan, who survived the war alongside him and saved his life a couple of times. 

The Prologue

Shortly after her escape from Sandor Clegane and return to the Brotherhood, an exhausted fifteen-year-old Nan wanders away from the group and has a full-fledged emotional breakdown on a riverbank over everything she’s been through. She only stops crying when a gigantic direwolf approaches her. Instead of eating her, the beast licks her tears away and demands to be petted. Feeling better than she has in a long time, Nan takes the direwolf back to the camp and informs the wary Brotherhood that this is Sharra, named after a witch queen from a song. That night, she dreams about a family in a castle surrounded by snow.

The Set-Up

The Brotherhood without Banners and the Heddle sisters get together and throw a very merry harvest party at the inn at the crossroads. Gendry only goes because he lives there, but is pleasantly surprised to see Nan dancing with an extremely drunk Thoros of Myr. She’s been making herself scarce lately and, while he won’t admit it in so many words, he’s missed her. As they banter, dance, and drink a bit of cider, he also realizes that he’s attracted to her. He resolves to mash down his feelings--she obviously views him as an overbearing older brother and couldn’t possibly be interested--until she calls all his assumptions into question by saying something like, “Yo, nice ass, Gendry.” Long story short, they end up having awesome sex. The next morning, she bids him a cheerful but glib adieu before running back to High Heart, leaving him to wonder if he irrevocably ruined their friendship.

The two don’t speak again until a week later, when Gendry visits Nan’s cottage with news of an interesting matter: Lord Londrew Frey has been cheating his smallfolk by giving them almost no share of the grain that they harvest. Londrew claims that he’s sending the grain to the Night’s Watch to help the war effort, but there’s evidence that he’s selling it overseas instead. Nan agrees to help, although she’s not sure how to do it; she can steal from the Twins and exchange the loot for food for the smallfolk, but that’s only a short-term solution. 

The conversation trails off, and Gendry finally reveals the other reason he came to see her: he wants to talk about That Night and What It Means. He’s halting and awkward. They’ve been friends for a long time, he says, so of course he cares about, um, what happens to her. He knows she never...you know...and what if there’s a child, Nan? He never thought about marrying, but, well... (He doesn’t say that he’s never thought about anything beyond the next task, next meal and next catastrophe until recently, and now he’s not sure how to do it.)

Nan angrily rebuffs him. (She doesn’t say how much she cares about him, how often she thinks about that night, or how badly she longs for a real family. Even if he felt more than friendship and duty, she would lose him eventually, and she can’t stand to lose anyone else.) Stung, Gendry rants about her decision to live all alone in a pile of sticks like a crazy old woods witch. Eventually the rant becomes less “insulting” and more “seriously, are you sleeping at all?” Nan admits that she’s been dreaming more and more about the war and a strange Northern family, one of whom looks like her. In his taciturn way, Gendry expresses sympathy. They watch Sharra play among the weirwood stumps for a while, and then Nan’s face lights up.

“You know,” she says, “someone once thought I looked like a Stark girl.”

The Middle

After an obligatory “wait, WHAT” from Gendry, the two journey to Acorn Hall to get some help from Lady Smallwood, a longtime ally of the Brotherhood. They run into some heartwarming hijinks along the way, mostly brought on by the fact that Nan is beloved by every farmer, prostitute, and orphan in the Riverlands, while Gendry has one of those vibes that make little kids demand that he give them a ride on his shoulders or look at a cool rock they found. Lady Smallwood is pleased to see them and embarrasses Nan by reminiscing about when she was just a wee lass. She grows grave, though, once Nan’s dressed up as a lady in her daughter’s old clothes.

“You do have the Stark look, come to think,” she says. Nan repeats what she now tells everyone, including herself--she comes from King’s Landing and never knew her family--but her dreams are even more vivid that night.

The next day, Nan and Gendry head for the Twins, “disguised” as Arya Stark and her sworn sword. They flirt on the way, despite her determination to keep her distance and his to not renew the sentiments she found so disgusting. Once they arrive at their destination, the Frey household scoffs at Nan’s imperious claims that she is the lost Arya and, by the way, Lord Londrew better stop his peasant-cheating bullshit. Then several older Frey cousins remark that she is the very picture of Lady Lyanna Stark at the Tourney at Harrenhal, causing Lord Londrew turns courteous and welcome her to his home. (Nobody remarks on Nan’s direwolf, as she left Sharra to roam in the woods; she’ll risk her own life, but not her big pup’s.) Nan grandly agrees, even as Gendry grumbles through his teeth that they’re either planning to kill her for being the false Arya or being the real one.

They argue more after she’s shown to her chambers. He reminds her of the famous aborted Red Wedding; she reminds her that they’re both armed to the teeth and smarter than any Frey, plus she thinks they can find proof of Londrew’s dirty dealings to send to Lord Edmure Tully. Their argument “devolves” into some sexy lady/sworn sword roleplay.

Later that night, they’re both shocked when the Freys take Gendry captive (with some difficulty, of course). He has all the markings of a Robert Baratheon bastard, and Londrew thinks he can use him to cause trouble for Queen Daenerys in a Blackfyre Rebellion kind of way. Londrew locks him in a dungeon and Nan in her room. He reveals that he knows who Nan is: an outlaw who comes from nowhere and belongs to no one. He further taunts her with his intention to create false hope for the Starks and Tullys by informing them of “Arya’s” survival, and hopes out loud that they kill Nan out of anger when they learn the “truth.”

Gendry has a dark night of the soul. Spurred by his resentment at being abandoned by his father and used as a pawn by the Freys, he realizes that he isn’t helping himself or anyone else by merely existing in the Riverlands. Whether or not he ends up with Nan or does something with his discovery of his parentage, he has to take charge of his life by going to see Queen Daenerys himself...but first he has to survive this ordeal with the Freys.

Luckily, Nan has already made her escape, thanks to a combination of technical skills and the goodwill of several Freys who are downtrodden or too loyal to Roslin Frey to fuck with her husband’s family’s emotions like that. She springs Gendry from the dungeon; he helps in this endeavor by promising to put in a good word for them with the queen. Reunited, they flee into the night. Gendry tells her that he wants to marry her, whether Daenerys recognizes him as her cousin or not. Nan says she’ll marry him when he comes back; she privately believes he’ll change his mind if his status improves, but almost losing him to the Freys has taught her that refusing to care about him hurts more than letting herself love him. They make love one last time before parting ways, he for King’s Landing and she for Riverrun.

The Conclusion

Nan reaches Riverrun and begs an audience with Lord Edmure Tully, who accepts her request. As a lord who takes his obligations to his vassals seriously, he can appreciate her defense of the smallfolk despite her worrying outlaw status. Once he sees her, though, he’s bowled over by her resemblance to Brandon, Ned, Lyanna, and Benjen (plus the wolf), despite having reservations thanks to Catelyn’s harrowing experience with the false Aryas. Yet his reaction is nothing to Nan’s. Edmure’s Tully look brings back memories of Catelyn, Robb, Sansa, Bran, and Rickon. Then she remembers Ned and Jon, the only ones who looked like her. And everything else comes back when she remembers Jon: Needle, Bran’s accident, the journey to King’s Landing, her terrible final fight with Sansa, her father’s death. Edmure and Roslin take pity on the disheveled young woman sobbing in their hall, and give her a bed and some ale before gently trying to sort everything out.

Meanwhile, Gendry arrives in King’s Landing. He visits Tobho Mott, now an old man, and learns that he was sent away for his own protection at Ned Stark’s command, not outright abandoned. Then he goes to Daenerys’s throne room to wait in line with the general population, When the time comes, he publicly announces who he is and pledges his loyalty, telling her bluntly that he’d rather go ahead and get eaten by her dragons than be endlessly used as a pawn and start another war like the one he lived through.

“Okay, respect,” Daenerys says, enjoying both the anti-oppression message and the drama. She has him taken to a more private chamber and, after find out his whole deal from Varys, meets with him. She reveals that she used to want to Kill All Baratheons, but then she realized that her family’s downfall was more nuanced than she’d been led to believe, plus it didn’t take her long to love her cousins Shireen Baratheon and Mya Stone. She’s happy to find another cousin, having known very little of family, and his loyalty means a great deal to her. Seriously, he can name the region and she’ll find him a castle or at least some unclaimed land. Does he want a title? A last name?

“Um,” says Gendry, utterly overwhelmed. “Is there anything near High Heart?”

At the same time, Nan/Arya has recovered enough from her shock to be merely completely wigged out. She doesn’t know if she can handle being Arya--she can barely handle being Nan--or if her family will even want the wild, haunted outlaw she’s become. And will Gendry want her as Arya Stark? Unsure what to do, she sneaks out of Riverrun, grabs Sharra/her namesake Nymeria, and rides like hell to High Heart.

Several days later, Gendry arrives at Riverrun, which is in an utter uproar. Edmure and Roslin are frantic about having possibly lost the real Arya; Brynden Tully is trying to get everyone to calm down so the fallout won’t be too bad when they find out she’s a fake; Jaime Lannister is lounging decadently around the great hall and grousing about how well the supposed Real Arya hid herself from him; and, most important, Jon Snow and Sansa Stark are there, tense and worried.

“Wait,” says Gendry, “you’re telling me the Freys got something right for once?”

There’s another uproar when everybody realizes that this is the newly acknowledged Baratheon bastard, cousin to the queen, and that he’s been traveling alone with the Lost Arya. 

(“You better be prepared to marry her,” threatens Edmure. 

“Why?” Jaime asks. “She can do better.”)

Eventually, Jon and Sansa manage to speak to Gendry alone. They tell him how desperately they want Arya back, and how afraid they are that this won’t be her. Nobody’s even told Catelyn about this latest hope, because it will be too hard on her. They describe what Arya was like as a kid. Jon tells him how close they were; he’s missed her every day of his life since he went to the Wall. Sansa talks about how annoyed she used to get with Arya back then, and how stupid it all seems now; she’d give anything to see her sister’s messy hair and muddy face again. They’re both worried that, even if this is the real Arya, she won’t want to come back after so much time. But they would let her go, if that would make her happy.

With a sinking feeling, Gendry knows that the girl from their stories can’t be anyone but Nan. He also knows that a Stark lady is too highborn to marry a bastard, even an acknowledged one with royal connections. Still, he can’t keep the truth from her.

“That sounds like Nan,” he tells them. “Follow me. I’ll talk to her first.”

So they all head up to High Heart, where Nan/Arya has resumed her solitary existence. Sharra/Nymeria bounds out immediately and aggressively licks Jon and Sansa before going off to roughhouse with Ghost. Nan/Arya, though, refuses to come out of her hut; however, she reluctantly lets Gendry come inside. He tells her that she can be Nan or Arya or anyone else--she’ll be great no matter who she is, and he’ll love her. They can live in the woods or at the Inn with the orphans or in the castle the queen promised him. Or, if her family doesn’t mind, in Winterfell. Because they love her, too.

“How can they?” Arya demands. “You know what I’ve done, what I am. I was never what they wanted, and now? I’m an outlaw, and a killer, and I’m no one at all.”

At which point Sansa sweeps majestically into the hut, with Jon at her heels.

“You’re not no one,” she tells Arya. “You’re Arya Stark. My sister. And if I didn’t want you, it was because I didn’t know what it would be like to lose you.”

"And you’re a champion of the Riverlands, from what we hear,” says Jon. “Do you remember the sword I gave you?”

“Needle,” says Arya. 

Soon all three siblings are crying and hugging and, when Gendry tries to absent himself, Arya pulls him into the embrace.

“This is Gendry,” she tells her siblings. “He’s coming with us to Winterfell.”

The Epilogue

Arya, Gendry, Jon, and Sansa arrive at Winterfell, Ghost and Nymeria on their heels. Arya wonders aloud if she can find a way to be a lady and still be herself. “Probably,” says Gendry, “but you don’t have to be a lady to be Arya.” The conversation turns to how he’ll adjust to his life as the queen’s acknowledged cousin, including whether he’ll give himself a last name. Arya teases him about becoming “Gendry Stark,” but he says that sounds just fine to him, and she sees his point.

Finally, they get to Winterfell, and almost everyone is there: Robb, Bran, Rickon, Theon, Old Nan, Hodor, Maester Luwin, Princess Jeyne, Ygritte, and a passel of new nieces and nephews. And, of course, Catelyn, who practically falls on her long-lost daughter. They show her the place they’ve set for her at the table all these years, and she sits down with her family.

Subplots 

Twenty-two-year-old Sansa begins to feel restless after a few much-needed years of safety and stability with her family. Catelyn and Robb are both overprotective of her after her ordeal in King’s Landing, encouraging her to delay considering marriage for a few more years and getting nervous if she ventures outside the castle walls. She’s secretly fearful of the outside world herself, but she still wants to do something with her life. So she starts up a correspondence with her old friend/flirt Margaery Tyrell, who shares some highly interesting news about King’s Landing

Nineteen-year-old Bran similarly feels stifled by his well-meaning family, who tend to treat him as a child to some degree despite his physical/emotional maturity and the Very Real Psychic Shit he’s dealing with. (He and Sansa joke about it sometimes.) The arrival of Meera and Jojen Reed, two siblings around his age who know what he’s dealing with and are generally cool, make life a little easier to deal with. 

After a years-long exile as Queen Daenerys’s ambassador in Pentos, Tyrion Lannister returns to King’s Landing to be Hand of the King. He has a fearsome reputation as a killer, only partially earned, and a WHOLE lot of unresolved trauma. When Petyr Baelish approaches him with a crass offer to go into the brothel business together, Tyrion begins to suspect that something more sinister is afoot. Also, he’s not sure if Sandor Clegane wants to kill him or just really likes glaring at people. 

[occupyvenus]

Some concentrated thoughts on undercover!Jon

I know that writing about this is akin to beating a dead horse (enough people have talked about this), but I still wanted to write down my collected thoughts on the matter one more time. I don’t believe that Jon is currently executing some tricky scheme, he simply chose the last way out of a hopeless dilemma. A little disclaimer to start this: D&D are shitty writers and I totally understand people who see this undercover!Jon theory as nothing but a desperate, but ultimately pointless attempt to make sense of their bullshit. I get it. But I will still hold onto some hope that all of this makes sense somehow. Until season 8 proofs me wrong, I’ll believe that Jon is smarter than this and learned from his predecessors mistakes.

Here are the five things Jon knows to be true that would and should influence his behaviour and decisions.

The North (and the Vale) will never accept a southern ruler, even less so a targaryen one. You can agree with them or not, you can think that a united Seven Kingdoms is (are?) better than separate individual ones, but that is the Lords and people’s stance. After Robert’s successful rebellion and Robb’s unsuccessful one there is too much bad blood between the Northerners and the IT / the Targs. This is something that has been established by the show numerous times. Especially some of the more outspoken of Jon’s bannermen, Lyanna Mormont and Lord Royce, will not stand with his decision. 

Jon’s position in the North itself is rather shaky. Not only is he an elected ruler and can thus be un-elected, his trueborn “siblings” will always have a better claim to Winterfell and the North than he. The current power structure in the North is rather convoluted as it is. Jon was named KITN, but Sansa remained Lady of Winterfell. Meaning, that if the Northern Lords would want to replace him they have a couple of reasonable candidates, especially now that Bran has returned. If the Northern Lords wanted to crown Sansa or Bran or Arya instead, or if one of them would ask for the Northern crown, there isn’t much Jon could do about it. And no one in the entire world could tell me that Jon would fight his siblings on this. This has also been stated by the show and it’s something that appears rather obvious. For now, the Northerners are loyal to Jon, not Sansa, but if Jon fucks up by bending the knee? Their loyalty could shift. 

Dorito considers herself the rightful ruler of all seven kingdoms. Jon knows very well how much she wants the IT. She sees those who refuse to bend the knee as traitors, oathbreakers and being in open rebellion. Jon is yet unaware of the Tarly’s death by living-cremation, but her behaviour during their first meeting and their following interactions should give Jon some clues about Dorito’s view on those who refuse to acknowledge her as queen. She has shown to be ready to take what she wants with “fire and blood”. If the North won’t bend, she will break it. We have no reason to believe that she’ll show the little bear, or Lord Glover or Royce or the Starks more mercy than she showed Randyll and Dickon. UNLESS someone manages to convince her to spare them. 

They need Dorito, her armies and her dragons. Without her they are fucked. I don’t know what else to add to this. 

Dorito is NOT ready to help them unconditionally, the IT plus the 7 K-Doms is still her ultimate endgoal. Many people act like she is, but her actions in episode 7 contradict that notion. First she demands that Jon bends the knee and even after he has done so in private (!) she still won’t take her armies and dragons north unless Cersei agrees to a truce. She said so herself, she won’t act against the WW until her position in the south is secure. Even after seeing the Army of the Dead and losing one of her dragons, she is still not ready to put all other issues aside. She simply isn’t.  

So keeping these five things in mind, one last question: what is Jon’s goal? I would say, the same thing that has been his single goal since, one could argue, season 1: Defeating the White Walkers and saving humanity. I cannot find a single reason why “restoring the targ-dynasty and winning Dorito back her self-acclaimed birthright” would have earned it’s place on Jon’s wishlist. If we work under the assumption that Jon is not a complete idiot and is aware of all this - the North won’t accept a targ, his bastard status makes his hold on the North rather insecure, Dorito is convinced that she’s the rightful ruler, they desperately need her, and the IT (7 k-doms included) is her supreme goal - what can he do to get out of this dilemma? Why is he doing what he does? As I see it there are three possibilities that each build on the other. Let’s start with the one that is, one first sight, presented by the show and end with my personal idea of the undercover!Jon theory. 

1. He’s super impressed by Dorito, believes in her cause and has fallen madly in love with her as a cherry on top. Rather unlikely, not impossible but still unlikely and pretty boring. I would accept either a) Jon falling for her, with their romantic relationship being conflicted because of his political stance or b) him bending the knee out of necessity without any romantic feelings involved. Seriously, even as someone who’s rather passionate anti-aegony I half-expected option a) to happen. Imagine boatbang (without the predecending but-kneeling) but with Jon saying something like “This doesn’t mean I give you the North. I can’t, not without my bannermen’s and siblings backing.” and her giving in to her feelings despite that, alluding to the prospect that they’ll convince his bannermen together. That would have been a scenario I wouldn’t doubt. But if things truly are as they seem, Dorito’s character growth is completely halted. She gets everything she wants, without being forced to make a hard choice. She doesn’t have to choose between giving in to her feelings, being with the man she came to love or treating him like a rival monarch who refuses to bend the knee. That’s a decision she doesn’t have to make because Jon (seemingly) hand her everything on a silver platter. Yes, Jon seems pretty stupid and ooc for doing it, but it’s Doritos’s character who ultimately suffers from this. There is no real tension caused by her entering this relationship. She doesn’t have to give up anything by choosing to be with Jon. No tension means no conflict. No conflict means no growth. No growth means no arc, means no “character”. 

On a side-note: This is pure speculation, but I don’t belong to the people who think Jon’s parentage alone will cause some tension on Dorito’s part either. I don’t think she’ll immideatly see him as a threat or rival for the throne, I think that she will be happy to find out about this. She will probably believe it’s fate that she met and fell in love with the other last living targ. Destined to rebuild her family's dynasty together (as so many aegony-stans love to put it). It will be Jon’s rejection of his heritage, him choosing his stark-side that will cause a rift. But that’s a different topic all together. 

Also, because it has to be mentioned, assuming that Jon gave up his kingdom against the wish of his subjects, without even discussing the issue with his bannermen and siblings is plain insulting to his character. I believe that he would contemplate bending the knee, since it would secure his people’s survival and that is his most important motivation, but he would not do it out of a whim without even trying to persuade his people to give him their blessing before hand. Again, I would buy Jon agreeing to it, under the condition that he first discusses it with the people who put this power in his hands in the first place. Jon saying that he’ll try to convince them, without promising it, makes sense. Jon just doing a 180, going “you are my queen now. They will tots understand” does not. 

Another side-note: Before moving on, there is a very, very, very slight chance (< 0.000000000000000001 % IMO) that Jon will abandon his Northern identity and unconditionally take Dorito’s side. I suppose, this could turn into a “tragic love story”, the last two living targs banding together to save the world, being opposed by the mean, small-minded lords who are unthankful for the generous gift they are offering: To be ruled over by their benevolent, dragon-supported valyrian overlords. Restoring the world back to it’s proper order, if only those stubborn lords would bend the knee to a monarch they do not want. The tragedy. If only they had heard Dorito in the Dragonpit. Targs are extraordinary, they aren’t just people like everyone else. They deserve to rule because of their superior genetic traits (dragons). If only those mere humans could see that and accept the natural order of things, with the superior race being on top. No one would have to be burned alive, if they’d accept the targ-übermeschen as their rightful rulers, because they need someone to keep them in lines, normal humans can’t just govern themselves. Only with an extraordinary targ leading them, can they prosper and live in peace ... But I don’t have to tell you what I would think about that -_-. Gods, I hate the concept and all implications of a targ-restoration so so so much. Goebbels couldn’t write a better propaganda fairytale if he tried.The blond, fair rulers, who are obsessed with keeping their bloodline pure and benefit from certain “genetic” traits ie dragons, returning to reclaim their “birthright”, restoring the proper order that was disrupted by the “inferior”,“ordinary” humans rebelling against them, because society can only function with a specific sort of people controlling it. Uuughh... Nobody can tell me GRRM wouldn’t be aware of the fucked up connotations this ending would create.Like, fuck.FUCK.Targ-restoration is the worst. 

So assuming that Jon’s decision to bend the knee was not based on his infatuation with Dorito and/or his firm conviction in her cause, forward to “possibility” number two that builds a bridge to the controversial undercover!Jon theory: 

2. He bent the knee to get Dorito on his side.  Leaving all potential romantic feelings aside, only looking at the “political” considerations Jon’s primary reason for bending the knee was to enlist her in the war against the Others, not his personal opinion on her. While I believe this to be true - after realizing how fucked they are he gives in to the first condition Dorito put forward - it simply won’t work and Jon should be aware of this. Jon knows that the Northern Lords are opposed to southern and/or targ-rule and have some reasonable alternatives to replace him with. It makes no sense for him to actually believe that the northern lords will just bend the knee and give up their autonomy without a fight when he tells them just how amazeballs Dorito is. I refuse to believe that Jon is that stupid and can’t anticipate his bannerman's reaction. He should also anticipate that his bannermen will most likely try to dump him and declare Sansa (since Bran withdrew from his political position) as their leader instead. So assuming that Jon is aware of this ...

3. Jon gave her something by giving her nothing, while “securing her alliance” another way. He knows that the North will reject Dorito, he knows that the Northern Lords will rebel against his decision to bend the knee, most likely replacing him with one of his siblings because of it. Jon is smart (please let Jon be smart) and anticipated this and came up with a plan that a) ensures Dorito’s help despite the Northern Lords refusal to bend the knee b) prevents Dorito from burning the “treasonous” lords. He bent the knee to Dorito, knowing that the Northern Lords would not follow suit, endeared himself to her in numerous ways and “seduced” her to gain her trust and ear. If the Starks and the North react the way I would expect them to, Jon can still talk Dorito into helping them and he can talk her out of punishing them for “oathbreaking”, because she is in love with him. I think it was @a-baleful-howl (please correct me if I’m wrong) who first actively drew a distinction between undercover!Jon and sacrificial!Jon and honestly, my take on it was always in line with the latter. The point is that Jon only plays a part to get opposing factions working together. Entering in an intimate relationship with Dorito allows him to secure her assistance and it might even bring her to soften her stance on Northern Independence, at least temporarily. She’s not going to burn the family and people of the man she loves. She will listen to him if he asks her to “give them time” and not do anything impulsive (like burning some people alive to prove a point). For the sake of completeness: This theory doesn’t necessarily refute any level of actual feelings on his part. Either he only pretends to love a woman who’s clearly smitten with him or he withholds valuable information (the fact that the Northerners won’t bend the knee because of him and will probably deselect him for doing it) from the woman he has any amount of feelings for. He knows that Dorito and his people are going to clash once they meet, he expects his people to drop him as their leader and that his oath to Dorito will be thus meaningless, he’s simply putting himself in a position to de-escalate the situation. Defeating the Night King depends on Dorito’s actions, much more than the North's or anybody else’s for that matter. Just as he almost destroyed a possible alliance with Cersei to endear himself to Dorito (it backfired, but what was he supposed to do? Take back his but-kneeling in front of Dorito and an audience? How do you think she would have reacted if he had taken that back and declared the North independent once again?), he’s willing to sacrifice his position and reputation in the North to get influence over the person with the dragons. 

This would encompass all considerations I mentioned in the beginning. Jon knows that him giving up Northern Independence isn’t going to come through (points 1 & 2), so he doesn’t completely dismiss his people's wishes and the cause his brother died for, but Dorito at least believes it would (point 3) giving her a major motivation to come to their aid, which they desperately need (point 4) and getting her emotionally invested in him would give her an extra-reason to fight this war, even if her other conditions aren’t met (point 5) and soothe the conflict that arises from points 1 and 3.

Or maybe I’m wrong about all this and Jon is an utter idiot and D&D destroyed his character in the span of like 3 episodes and plan to turn this series into Dorito/targ-stan-masturbation-porn. Could be. Not saying I would put it past them. 

[lilbreck]

AGoT Chapter 5 - 8

If you want to follow along, I'm tagging my ASoIaF reading as tonya rereads asoiaf. As I said last time, feel free to comment, I'd love to talk about stuff. Point out some things I missed, whatever.

There are a lot of questionable parenting skills in this group of chapters. Robert's a bad king, Jon is angry but still loves his family, and the Starks are fucking northern fools, even Catelyn.

Chapter 4: Eddard

Age 35

Not even gonna lie, Ned's first description of how Robert used to look sounded a bit like he had a crush. No offense, but Ned has bad taste in men. How he looks now… If there's perfume coming off Robert, is it supposed to be Cersei's, does he wear perfume himself, or did he seriously visit some brothels on the way up north? I'd believe any of it. Also, as much as everyone loves Ned… he seriously says he loves Robert because, after fifteen years, the man is still obsessed with his sister?

We get a hint here that the cold (which I commented on in Bran's chapter) is potentially unusual. Though Ned says that late summer snows are common enough, I'm not sure how much to believe that.

You know, the more we see of Robert, the less I like him. I shudder to think what Lyanna would have gone through if she had married him. She may or may not still be alive, but she'd be married to a drunken, abusive (IIRC) ass who sleeps around on her. If Robert had been a better man, I wonder how differently all this would have turned out.

The first Lords of Winterfell had been men hard as the land they ruled. In the centuries before the Dragonlords came over the sea, they had sworn allegiance to no man, styling themselves the Kings in the North.

I just want a story where the ghosts of the first Lords of Winterfell reign down terror on those in the South. Maybe someone who writes ASoIaF/GoT fanfic could write that and link me.

So, I had heard conflicting reports of how the Starks were killed by Aerys. Apparently, Brandon died first (strangled, and just a few days before his wedding!) and I'm assuming his father burned after. We haven't touched on that in this chapter yet.

I'm assuming (and correct me if I'm wrong) that Ned not wanting to trust a child to Tywin has to do with the Targaryen children that died and Ned and Robert's split. It's the only reason I could think of that Ned would think speaking of it would open old wounds.

“They say it grows so cold up here in winter that a man’s laughter freezes in his throat and chokes him to death,” Ned said evenly. “Perhaps that is why the Starks have so little humor.”

The cold seems to give them subtle sass to spare, though. This chapter is full of damn good quotes. I'll leave it off on this one:

For a moment Eddard Stark was filled with a terrible sense of foreboding. This was his place, here in the north. He looked at the stone figures all around them, breathed deep in the chill silence of the crypt. He could feel the eyes of the dead. They were all listening, he knew. And winter was coming.

Chapter 5: Jon

Age 14

Okay, this Jon is a bit different from the serious and solemn young man that we saw in Bran's chapter. Of course, the circumstances are different, so that could be some of it. We do get a lot of description from Jon's POV. I'm going to copy his descriptions here, save Tommen (because he's pretty much a non-entity to Jon) and Tyrion because it says nothing about Jon's perception of the man, just how fascinated he is by his appearance.

< His father helped her up the steps to the dais and led her to her seat, but the queen never so much as looked at him. Even at fourteen, Jon could see through her smile. >

< The king was a great disappointment to Jon. His father had talked of him often: the peerless Robert Baratheon, demon of the Trident, the fiercest warrior of the realm, a giant among princes. Jon saw only a fat man, red-faced under his beard, sweating through his silks. He walked like a man half in his cups. >

< He had the Princess Myrcella on his arm. She was a wisp of a girl, not quite eight, her hair a cascade of golden curls under a jeweled net. Jon noticed the shy looks she gave Robb as they passed between the tables and the timid way she smiled at him. He decided she was insipid. Robb didn’t even have the sense to realize how stupid she was; he was grinning like a fool. >

< Sansa looked radiant as she walked beside him, but Jon did not like Joffrey’s pouty lips or the bored, disdainful way he looked at Winterfell’s Great Hall. >

< Ser Jaime Lannister was twin to Queen Cersei; tall and golden, with flashing green eyes and a smile that cut like a knife. He wore crimson silk, high black boots, a black satin cloak. On the breast of his tunic, the lion of his House was embroidered in gold thread, roaring its defiance. They called him the Lion of Lannister to his face and whispered “Kingslayer” behind his back.

Jon found it hard to look away from him. This is what a king should look like, he thought to himself as the man passed. >

Looking at that, Jaime is the only one who Jon doesn't dismiss in one way or another. I wonder if it's a coincidence that Jaime is getting a kind of (kind of) redemptive arc. I'm not really sure about Tyrion, I'll have to get back to you when I read further.

Also, Jon may or may not have a crush on Jaime.

So, given that Theon ignores Jon, I'm thinking Jon's dislike is also returned. How long has Theon been there, and when did the dislike start? Was there one instance, or did they just take an instant dislike to each other. Is this answered later on? Guess I'll find out.

His eyes stung. Jon rubbed at them savagely, cursing the smoke. He swallowed another gulp of wine and watched his direwolf devour the chicken.

I have a feeling that isn't from the smoke. Fuck, poor Jon. Beyond that, Ghost is out here intimidating dogs three times his size.

Given how very angry and hurting Jon is concerning the fact that he's a bastard, it does say a lot about him that he remains so loyal to his family later on.

Chapter 6: Catelyn

You know, we get a very different view on how political marriages can go in this world. Robert and Cersei have a hellish marriage where she's very obviously not happy and he doesn't care a bit. Meanwhile, we've got Ned and Catelyn who really seem to have a good marriage with, apparently, a satisfying sex life on both their ends.

“Robert would never harm me or any of mine. We were closer than brothers. He loves me. If I refuse him, he will roar and curse and bluster, and in a week we will laugh about it together. I know the man!”

Okay, first off, it's very obvious that Ned has a (potentially willful) blindness to who his friend really is. I also wonder if he thought he was protecting his wife by not telling her about Jon's real parents? Because the Robert we're introduced to, the one Catelyn is obviously very aware of, would not spare his family because they didn't know if he found out Ned had commited the treason of hiding a Targaryen child. Especially if that child was Lyanna's, and he wouldn't care that Lynnna was Ned's sister.

I think this is going to call for a "fucking northern fool" tag. I have a feeling it will come in handy.

I would just like to point something out:

“And in mine,” she blazed, angry now. Why couldn’t he see? “He offers his own son in marriage to our daughter, what else would you call that? Sansa might someday be queen. Her sons could rule from the Wall to the mountains of Dorne. What is so wrong with that?”

“Gods, Catelyn, Sansa is only eleven,” Ned said. “And Joffrey … Joffrey is …”

She finished for him. “… crown prince, and heir to the Iron Throne. And I was only twelve when my father promised me to your brother Brandon.”

Everyone likes to rag on Sansa because she was excited to marry a prince and refused to see what Joffrey was. However, this conversation hints to me — speaking on assumptions from the perspective of a long marriage — that Ned had concerns about Joffrey (or reservations) that he had probably spoken to his wife about. She ignores all that in favor of how Sansa could be queen.

Not in a power grab, mind you, but in the way all mothers want their children to have the best possible chance in life. She would have filled her daughter with stories (as would have everyone around her). They would have told her what an honor it was and how lucky she was. She's eleven and sheltered, just as all the Stark children are, even the bastard boy, of course she's going to cling to it.

I'd also like to point out that Catelyn is so thrown by how scared she feels and how much she knows shit's about to go wrong that she straight up hops out of be naked to the shock of both her husband and the Maester (who has been trying to get out of that damn room of naked and half naked people). I need to find my small amusements where I can.

Just… I have to question what they thought would happen if they found out and were able to prove that Cersei and her family had killed Jon Arryn? Did they think that Sansa would be fine married off to a prince who would probably resent her father? Did they think they could back out of it? You know what, Catelyn is now roped into my "fucking northern fool" tag.

I mean, they didn't have much of a choice, but she didn't even see what dangers could come with all this. Not for a second do we see her think "Hmmm, a boy might not be happy to marry the daughter of the man who got his mother (probably) executed for the murder of The King's Hand, who was also a good friend of the king." For fuck's sake!

Chapter 7: Arya

Age 9

Okay, Arya's resentment of Sansa rings clearly through the first few paragraphs of this chapter. Also, she straight up mentally blames Sansa for attracting the septa's attention… when the septa didn't look away from the princess until Arya raised her voice. Hell, Sansa even tried to placate the septa by saying that they were talking about how happy they were to have the princess there.

Everything in this chapter speaks of her being both overdramatic and jealous of her sister. Down to thinking to herself that no one except Nyperia loves her. Now, I'm not saying that as a dig at Arya. She's 9. This is how she should be. I do have a problem with people who use her very obvious unreliable narrator POV to say that Sansa was somehow in the wrong here. I'm still waiting on this great scene that proves that Sansa is a bully to Arya.

I really do like Jon and Arya's relationship here.

Chapter 8: Bran

So, wait, when does Bran's direwolf get a name? It doesn't matter, that poor direwolf was trying to warn Bran not to climb. I'm assuming that Bran's in-depth knowledge of how to get in and out of Winterfell is going to come in handy. Like I said, it's been more than a while since I've read this.

You know, I'm sitting here laughing about the lengths they're all going to try and get him to stop climbing and he's all "whatevs" about it. But then I remember what's about to happen and I'm sad again. I don't want to read this.

Yeah, shit's only going to go wrong from here.

[dachi-chan25]

Game of Thrones Season 7 Episode 6 Recap Pt.2

WARNINGS: SPOILERS; not a D@€n€r¥$ fan; Jonsa shipper.

—————-

3.- Back on Eastwatch Gendry is bitching to Beric and Thoros for their betrayal, and The Hound tells him to shut the fuck up (god the Hound is such a #mood character) and honestly I get a bit confused round here cuz so much stuff happens on Eastwatch I don’t even remember the order of this two conversations:

Tormund attempts to talk to the Hound, it’s hillarious, and you know what? They talk about Brienne, someone they have in common, #yes I am very salty Arya hasn’t been mentioned at all.

Beric and Jon have a conversation, again very intresting cuz Beric says Jon doesn’t look like Ned at all (for real you going there Beric?) and he must look like his mom (wasn’t he the one Stark children that looked the most like Ned??? The show confuses me greatly) just so we could be reminded again that indeed Jon looks like Lyanna and that *looks at smudged writing on my hand* Ragger Targpycola is his sperm donnor, thus he is a Targ. Also we get Jon saying he is going through all this bullshit dumbass hunt for the North (pls keep this in mind I beg you) Beric says he is doing this not for any King or Queen to sit on a throne (curioser and curioser) he is doing it for life, Jon quotes his vows of the NW, and they have this very intresting convo about life and the inevitabiliy of death.

I find very intresting Beric once again remind us of the little importance of titles and thrones right now, and Jon quoting his NW vows plus that Mance reminder he got from Tormund, well well I can see where this is going.

Also Beric knows about Jon’s resurrection but D the supposed Love of his life epic wuv story owo doesn’t, also Jon doesn’t seemed bothered by Beric knowing, and they both talk about what a cryptic asshole is R'hollor.

Yeah so The Hound guides them to the mountain with the arrow shaped top (yeah you know the one he saw in his insta vision) but they have to cross a frozen lake (the ice is not so thick) and a giant ass Wight bear is coming towards them, actually I found this whole thing so boring? The bear looked really fake (guess all that budget went to dragons) and really the whole purpose of this is to create fake tension and sense of danger, I couldn’t even get worried about any of the Suicide Squad, Thoros got injured but again he is one very minor character not that popular with the audience so we can kiss this drunken red priest goodbye.

Yeah so after this absolute bullshit they atract the attention of the WW building a fire, and ambush them (this FUCKING plan y'all) they very predictably are getting their assess handed to them by the wights til Jon kills the WW and the wights drop dead on the spot (k I take it back this is the CW, only in the V@mpir€ Di@ri€$ such convinient stuff happens) shit hits the metaphorical fan when an entire army of the death is matching towards our brave (and dumb) heroes.

Gendry being the fastest runner is sent back to Eastwatch to send for help while the Hound struggles to capture the only wight that very conviniently didn’t turn to dust when they killed the WW (I never thought to get a dumber storyline than the Jaime and Bronn rescue Myrcella from Dorne with no plan whatsoever but here we are) and how??? Like this would have been easily solved by bringing horses, or you know a damned raven!!! Jon already did an expedition beyond the wall! He was the goddamned Lord Commander and didn’t he for a moment consider they might need this stuff for a Wight hunt???? Deus ex machina in it’s finest. Also Gendry told us at the beginning of the damn episode it was the first time he has seen snow, he doesn’t know the territory how is he getting back to Eastwatch??? This makes even less sense by the minute I just can take seriously any of this stuff thus I can’t get emotionally involved and be seriously scared or worried for Suicide Squad.

Yeah so part of the lake cracks under the weight of thousands of animated corpses and dumb wight hunters, and they are left on a circule of ice surrounded by wights, that I shit you not are waiting for the lake to freeze again so they can attack, I just– fuck it!

4.-Back on WF (oh fuck me) Sansa is on Arya’s chambers, I guess she is looking for something that gives her an idea as to who is exactly this person her little sister became, when she finds the bag of faces, Sansa is (rightfully) horrified, Arya enters the room talking all cryptically but Sansa is not up for this mindgames, dammit not with her family! And asks directly what they are, Arya gives her an answer and a vague threat of taking Sansa’s face, whyyyyyy dude??? Another big trigger for Sansa, her abuser flyed people alive, hell she flyed that nice granny that tried to help Sansa, I know Arya doesn’t know, and I am not comparing her with Ramsey, but fuck what is it with the let’s play a game as all this fucked up mind games, if this is a ploy I have no doubt Sansa will forgive Arya, and Arya is gonna feel terrible when she finds out all that Sansa went through, but D&D are truly doing some great disservice to Arya, so this game as a lot of people realized is the Faces Game, Arya has already said her lie and gave Sansa the dagger.

Sansa confirms my suspicion in this whole secret ploy of playing LF by going to him, and pretends to trust him with what Arya is doing (only a fool would trust LF) without mentioning the dagger and he suggests maybe Brienne can take care of Arya if things go that far.

And also the only reason she cares about the Northern Lords finding out about the letter is that she doesn’t want Jon loosing his army, holy fuck she really loves him, even LF must know for he is not trying to undermine Jon in any way.

This is the only possitive thing that has come from this stuff.

5.- Gendry arrives at Eastwatch and tells them to send a raven to D. Meanwhile she is chilling on DS with Tyrion, she’s frustrated by all this stupid heroic man like Jorah, Daario and this Jon Snow.

Tyrion frowns and point out at all this man are in Love with her (LMAO where?????) cuz all those longing looks are not to form an alliance (dude you’d be surprised)

Speculation time! Isn’t this super super wierd? I mean with Jorah we get all this big gestures in her name and stares, same with Daario who always softened with her and smiled a lot, but Jon??? excuse me but there are no fucking scenes to support Tyrion’s claim. And I think Tyrion knows, remember last episode’s farwell, yes the one where Jon doesn’t turn around cuz he doesn’t give a fuck, Jorah did turn around and D was giving full heart eyes, you know who saw all of this? Tyrion, he even gets a close up. Dude but why would he pushed this idea on D’s mind, oh I don’t know maybe to MAKE HER LISTEN, she listened to Daario about the fighting pits, and Tyrion has seen first hand (that don’t be more of the same speech) that Jon is good and maybe his influence could be good on D.

D says Jon is not in love with her but her expression tells me she really believes he is, oh my god her self absortion knows no bounds. Dude why would he be??? Also that gross ass comment about Jon being too short in front of Tyrion wow dude way to be insensitive.

Anyway they are discusing startegies for the upcoming reunion with Cersei, and gods D is super annoying, she is blaming Tyrion for his plans while simultaneously asking him for a plan like??? And what are *you* gonna do girl? What are *you* proposing? Just ride your dragon into KL and call yourself queen? That’s your strategy for everything sorry if I am skeptical about your supposed greatness. Very easy to point fingers at people when you are doing nothing but wait for their plans to benefit you.

Tyrion still tries to explain why having people fear you is not a good thing for a ruler that supposedly wants to break the wheel, when she the D compares herself with Aegon the Conqueror (damn I am getting good at analysing this stuff) I was like ???? She thinks being a conqueror is a good thing? How??? She is so narrow minded is painful to watch and hear. Tyrion is just as horrified, excuse the hell outta me but why are y'all having to talk her out of burning people and destroying places/resources, how is anyone like that worthy of the power and responsabilities that come with ruling?? and D gets fucking paranoid (so we begin to emmulate daddy dearest aren’t we) and says Tyrion doesn’t want to destroy his family, excuse the fuck out of me but she knows Tyrion was being persecuted for his father and nephew’s murder, she knows Cersei hates him cuz he told her and I can just feel sorry for Tyrion, he believed and admired this woman so much (tho he is also to blame for letting himself be dazzled by the pretty speeches and dragons) and now he is really getting to know her

Tyrion implies he wants to form a good strategy so she don’t lose her temper and…

“I never lose my temper” she said while losing her temper.“

He is like ummm the Tarlys? And she is trying to justify herself mother of god what is wrong with her? Even Tyrion says what she did was completely unnecessary.

He wants to talk about important stuff like how she plans to go about breaking the wheel, cuz he is smart enough to know they are not easy quick changes and it could take more than a lifetime for her to change the world, how is her legacy gonna live on after she is dead, you know this is pretty important stuff she should be concerned about (this stuff about family and legacy has been touched upon since this season first episode on the Jaime/Cersei scene) but she retorts with the fact that she is struggling with infertility and that if Tyrion has maybe disscused her death with Jaime? Tyrion explains how concerned he was about her well being during the Loot Train attack and she is awful really, she is completely delusional about Tyrion trying to betray her, but I also think it would be good to talk about the succession once she is queen so I give her that.

I seriously think Tyrion is gonna dump her anytime now.

———-

Part 3 coming up!

[nerdyguyranting]

Game of thrones - Eastwatch: Defending Sam

In the latest episode of Game of Thrones (since episode 6 has apparently been leaked so I should say officially the latest episode) Gilly reads a passage from a book from an old Maester by the name of Maynard and she finds out that Prince Rhaegar got his marriage with Elia Martell annulled so that he could remarry. However Sam interrupts her before she can finish talking. This has caused him to receive a lot of shit from people on the internet, and just like when people hated Theon for jumping of the boat, I feel the need to defend Sam.

There are several reasons people need to calm down regarding this issue. 

Sam had no idea she was talking about Rhaegar. Since Gilly is a poor reader and probably has never heard of Rhaegar, she called him Ragger.

She didn’t say who Rhaegar married, it’s true that Sam interrupted her and it’s possible that Maynard had written that down too, but Sam, who like I said didn’t even know she was talking about Rhaegar, couldn’t possibly be able to predict that what she was going to say would be important.

Speaking importance, Gilly didn’t even present the info as important. She mentioned it next to mentioning that there are 15872 steps in the sept of Baelor and that Maester Maynard wrote down whenever he took a shit. It’s not that Sam didn’t listen to her, he listened. That’s why he later mentioned the figure 15872. The thing was, the first two things she mentioned were completely uninteresting, this coupled with his frustration about the Masesters not´taking the threat of the white walkers seriously caused him to interrupt her because he assumed the third thing would be as well.

This is the biggest reason: Sam has no fucking clue that Rhaegar and Lyanna are Jon’s parents. Even if Gilly had said “Hey guess what, Rhaegar and Lyanna were married.” Sam would have responded “Huh, neat.” It wouldn’t mean anything at all to him. You people seem to have forgotten that the characters on the show doesn’t know everything we do. The fact that they were married was only important because we know that they are his parents and that it makes him the rightful king of the seven kingdoms, something that neither Sam or Gilly knew.

So give it a rest already. And to those assholes that are trying to make this a gender thing, yes I have actually seen people say that “Gilly being interrupted as she was about to say something important just so Sam could complain is a feeling every woman has experienced”, shut up. You are acting as if she knew that what she said was important, she had no clue either. She probably didn’t know who Rhaegar was, and most likely had no clue who Lyanna was either. Or what their marriage would mean. The reason she was spouting out facts from the book was mostly because she is happy that she can read and wants to do it as much as possible. The information about Rhaegar and Lyannas wedding was important to her as Maynard’s plenty toilet visits, evidenced by the fact that after Sam was done, she didn’t bring it up again, and why would she?

Lastly, while I have your attention I would like to correct one more misconception about the latest episode: Jon and the others are not going to capture a white walker, they are going to capture a wight. In other words a zombie. Capturing a white walker would be literally impossible since they can weaken it without killing it. That is all.

[magenta-storm]

Dickon, you absolute twit, why’d you have to get yourself killed like that, you poor big dumb puppy? (ngl though, the part of me that’s still mad at Billy after season 4 enjoyed it a little)

Fuck you Randyl, served you right. It was a bit sad when he touched Dickon’s arm, but fuck you, you’re still a terrible dad. And stupid. Seriously you decided to die for Cersei, why? It wasn’t out of loyalty, as Tyrion pointed out. So... just to be racist... apparently? What fucking morons. Sam obviously got his brains from his mother.

I love how the Citadel got the news so quickly when last season they didn’t even know that Jeor Mormont had died.

Dany, I hope that decision doesn’t come back to bite you in the ass. Maybe now Jorah’s back she’ll stop doing dumb things. Please god let her stop doing dumb things.

GENDRY. GENDRY GENDRY GENDRY!!!! thought you might still be rowing, oh my god, I died. Ridiculous fanservice, yes, but it was still hilarious.

I’m not sure if I entirely accept that it makes sense that’s he’s been in King’s Landing all this time, but meh.

Gendry, don’t you fucking DARE get yourself killed beyond the Wall before you see Arya again.

lol, I’m not sure weaponry skills are hereditary, but ok. Also not sure why he cares about his douchey dad...

Not sure I accept that Bronn dragged Jaime’s armour-clad ass all the way to the other side of the lake, but ok. Even if it was a river and they were washed downstream, it’s still a little hard to believe. But whatever, better than them being dead.

Excuse you Jaime, maybe show a bit of gratitude for Bronn saving your dumb ass?

Ugh. Just as it looks like maybe Jaime’s starting to grow a brain about Cersei, she’s pregnant? *groans for ten years* 

Also, if Cersei fucking does anything to Bronn, I will be so fucking mad. Also, how did Tyrion even get him a message? Varys’ little birds are compromised by Qyburn... but maybe he doesn’t know that? I’d have thought he’d have figured it out by now though.

I’m mad Bronn and Tyrion didn’t have a proper reunion scene.

How the actual fucking fuckballs has Bran been ‘north of the wall for years’ and then like two scenes later baby Sam is still a fucking baby?!?! Like, I can forgive Jon zipping to and from Dragonstone at the speed of light, we can’t have him spend the whole season traveling, but why the fuck would they even bother to include baby Sam when all it does is call attention to the screwy timeline?

The only possible reason I can imagine they bothered to recast Dickon just to kill him so quickly is if Sam’s going to inherit Horn Hill? Not that he should be able to with his vows and everything, but maybe if the White Walkers breach or destroy the Wall there won’t be enough Night’s Watch left to care if he leaves?

Not sure what to make of Rhaegar and Elia’s annulment. How do you annul two kids? I would have thought it would either be divorce or polygamy. I guess it was just so they could get the point across without saying Lyanna’s name, which Sam probably would have recognized, or at least took some notice of the name Stark. But still, just seems kinda stupid when they could have just gone with the polygamy thing. Seriously, how the fuck do you annul two kids? And without the permission of the King?

Jon patting Drogon was sweet and cool and also a bit weird. Why did he do that? Unless he was meant to be feeling some kind of compulsion to do it because of Targ blood, but I don’t think that really came across in his expression. It seemed more like just ‘lol why not pat a dragon?’ The way Drogon sniffed him was slightly hilarious. Like “...are you...” *dramatic sniff, dramatic blink* “yes you are!”

If that note was what I think it was, Arya and Sansa had better not have too big a fight over this. Having a confrontation and then sorting out their issues - great. Playing right into Littlefinger’s hands by having a huge rift come between them - terrible. They had better not do that TV thing where characters inexplicably refuse to explain their actions clearly and let the other party believe the worst possible version of events to draw conflict out longer. I fucking hate that so much.

Sidenote, I’m so fucking sick of Sansa’s ugly ass black dresses. Dress? With a weird little leather corset thing? Why?

If Jon and Arya don’t reunite this season I’m suing. Why couldn’t Jon look more happy about Arya being alive? Grr. They had better not fuck up that reunion and they’d better mention Needle.

I’m not sure what to make of the look on Dany’s face when she saw Jorah, and hugged him. It seemed really romantic, not sure it was supposed to be? I kinda ship Jorah x Dany, and think if any Dany pairing is going to happen in the show, it would make the most sense, but I also think it’d be weird to deviate that far from the books now.

If Jon and Dany are going to get together/get married, they haven’t done the best job setting it up. Didn’t Emilia and Kit used to date? lol, why the fuck can’t they manage to conjure up some better chemistry? Next to the Dany x Jorah reunion, it looked really noticeable that they don’t give a fuck about each other. lmao, Jon and Gendry had better chemistry in one scene! On the other hand though, if they were all over each other with sappy love at first sight bullshit it would ruin both their characters. It needs to be a bit more in the middle if that’s where they’re going with them.

[the-end-of-the-storm]

GoT 8x03 aka The Battle of WinterHELL

I can’t help but feel like this is the episode of missed opportunities and (unintentional) wtf moments. Just a little warning: this will not be the most positive review and I hate that I feel this way about the episode because I know how much work (55 consecutive night shots!) went into creating it but I can’t help but not love it. There was some good stuff in there too, and I’ll mention it but don’t expect hails of praise from this. Also, keep in mind, that I LOVE this show to death and that it’s not my intention to bash it – it’s still the best and most thought-through show I’ve ever seen – but I also need to get all my feeling about this mess out.

They foreshadowed the crypts being unsafe in 8x02 with the subtlety of a sledgehammer and then it turned out that they actually were breached… but it has like no consequences? No one that we know died and there wasn’t even a good close combat scene. Super odd. The whole crypts stuff in general was really … underwhelming.

I was really out there expecting some Sansa x Varys’ (ya know, Varys meeting his Dream Queen) bonding in the crypts but instead I got … another conversation with Tyrion … ok lol, thanks. Next.

On a positive side note, however, if they’d wanted to make Sansa x Tyrion romantic, they would have made a Wight attack her and Tyrion save her, you know this whole thing with her wanting a hero … or to make it a twist Sansa would have saved Tyrion. But D&D noped out of that big times.

Missandei, I love you, but you need to chill.

Alys Karstark, what are you up to? Stayin’ alive and all that … So far, at least.

Why bring Ghost out for 0.2 seconds for no purpose at all? Fighting with the Dothraki? Am I to believe that Ghost wouldn’t be with, um, I don’t know … Arya, Sansa or Bran? I’m sorry I don’t buy that. If you can’t afford or don’t want to spend money on his CGI to give him meaningful scenes THEN DON’T FUCKING SHOW HIM AT ALL! The only theory I have about Ghost being in both episodes since the parentage reveal but not in 8x01 when Jon returns to Winterfell and a Jon x Ghost reunion would have made sense, is that Ghost is a symbol for Jon’s Stark-ness and therefore I suspect that we’ll see him further until it is once and for all revealed that … tamtatatam … Jon wants to stay a Stark. Surprising, right? -.-

My main problem with this episode is that I felt disconnected to it all. Even in the bits where Jaime saved Brienne I felt like they were shot in a way that didn’t evoke emotions in me. Don’t know how to express myself correctly but it was just off. Felt like we were just swiping through the scenery, and over characters but didn’t actually focus on anyone.

That Arya x Walking Dead scene was alright HOWEVER how ‘bout some dialogue instead??

Ok, so the Night King raises the dead but no one has to fight a killed loved one??? (Or, you know maybe they did and I just couldn’t see it …) This is a missed opportunity so big I can’t quite believe it. Maybe it is time for a proper re-watch, idk.

Most of the episode I was wondering what the dragons were up to ... only to realize over and over again that they were up to LITERALLY nothing O.o 

I’m forever going to be pissed that when Bran said “You’re a good man. Bye.” He let Theon f*cking die when I was fully expecting him to be like: “You’re a good man, thank you. But now it’s time to go.” I would have felt that. But of course f*cking not. I suppose I did feel that, too.

Would it have killed them to give Jon a decent fighting sequence with the Night King though? Jon has been so obsessed with him and sacrificed so much to defeat the NK, he would have deserved to get to kick his ass a bit in one on one combat. (And no, the dragon fighting doesn’t count because I couldn’t tell shit apart. I still don’t know which dragon got bitten and which did the biting, like … this is what you chose to spend so much CGI on, are you for real???)

I’m slightly disappointed that the NK only tried to shot a dragon with his badass spears one f*cking time!! It’s not because I dislike the dragons and want them gone (which I do), I just think it could have made good visuals and raised the stakes even further (I know the stake were pretty darn high to begin with but I just didn’t feel anything.)

Can the Night King speak or does he just choose not to cause “reasons”? Well, at least he can smirk like a boss … Seriously, he’s the most generic and boring villain ever. Glad he’s a goner though.

Also, what was the point of the White Walkers? Like, did they do anything but stand around at the tree line? I was really waiting for them to … I don’t know … try to shoot a dragon out of the sky or fuck things up in the castle.

I like that it was Arya who saved the day, I wasn’t expecting that and I feel there was a bit of foreshadowing for this but it was done so anti-climactic I couldn't properly enjoy it. I still wish they would have done some more foreshadowing for this but they probably wanted it to be a complete “twist” that absolutely no one saw coming. I think I actually would have preferred Bran to be the NK but alright …

Am I wrong or were there less than 10 sentences spoken in 82 minutes?

I am not going to lie; I really wanted Jon to slay Wightserion. I love this man with all my heart but they have been butchering his character and POV to protect their Pol!Jon plot twist and I get it and I believe in Jon but having him slay a Zombie!Dragon would have been a great metaphor for him getting his old self back and literally slaying his dragons, you know? The more I think about this, the more I’m pissed that they didn’t …

I’m so confused that they killed of both of the Mormonts. The only good thing I saw in having Lyanna killed was that at least that would mean that Jorah would live … which is probably exactly why they did it. BIG DISLIKE.

I was relieved to see D*ny cry about Jorah’s death, he loved her so much it’s killing me inside. (How do people see the way Jorah loved her so fiercely and then see Jon with her as a contrast and are like … Yeah Jon and D, man, that’s love … TF?) Anyways, Jorah did her wrong, he did her good but he certainly deserved to be cried over by D*ny. I hate losing Jorah, I loved that devoted fool but I’m also low-key relived that at least this way, Jorah doesn’t have to pick between the North and D*ny. Also good, I loved Jorah and D fighting side by side – one last ride, I guess, going down together ... that's my kind of tea but whatever.

Also interesting, Jorah stayed at her side till the very end, while Jon ditched her first chance he got.

On that note, I also want to say that one of the most interesting things that happened in this episode was that Sam x Jon scene. You know the one where he walks past Sam, although Sam could’ve obviously used some help. Of course, you could say, yeah he just wanted to go kill the NK (which he obviously did want to) but I do believe that Jon’s decision to keep moving has a lot more to do with Bran than the NK. When he ditched D*ny, he said he needs to get to Bran, not “I need to find the NK and kill him”. He was under a lot of stress but his mind immediately went to Bran his brother and not to the Night King his enemy. I do believe that means something. Obviously, the argument can be made that it means the same but I doubt it. The walking past Sam thing could have been easily omitted but they didn’t. Sam, Jon’s best friend and BROTHER of the Night’s Watch. To me, it means that the Starks still are the priority of his heart, siblings or not. Jon knows now that Bran isn’t really his brother, that he’s the 3ER and let’s be real, he hasn’t had a meaningful interaction with Bran in years. He doesn’t know him anymore. But he still chose Bran. He couldn’t spare those ten seconds to help his best friend because Bran needed him. He ditched his NW brother/best friend AND his aunt/lover for his cousin Bran. I don’t know about you guys but I really loved that. Because it means so much regarding him being part of the pack and shit.

I very happily noted that D&D really went out of their way to make sure that absolutely nothing of significance was accomplished by D*ny or her armies or her dragons. Drogon and Rhaegal didn’t even take down Viserion, Arya Stark did. Kinda.

What will Arya be called now by the smallfolk? Kingslayer? Dragonslayer? Nightslayer? Armyslayer? Sooo many possibilies ...

I'm in the serious need of a Jonsa scene. I've been patient but now I need Jon to gaze at Sansa from the side and being awkward around her and then I'll need him to reveal his parentage to her and Ayra.

Also, big F*ck You to all the “leakers” out there who made me worry all week about B*atbang!Baby and lines like D: “Ily but you need to keep the Targline alive. Do you understand?” J: “No, I get it, Auntie, but Ily and I only want you”. I mean that Exodus dude wrote a fucking essay based on nothing but lies – why do people even do that? Get a hobby, man!

Resume: I still have faith in Pol!Jon, Dark!D and Jonsa but I’m really confused about the route they’re currently taking. I’m assuming Dany will leave for Dragonstone in 8x04 and Jon will join her and we’ll have another Jonsa separation with only three episodes left, so that’d really suck. However, if I could wish for only a single thing next episode, then I want Jon back, I miss my man so much.

I realize this all must sound kinda anti but I’m just a bit upset and tired. I do love this show and I will keep watching till the bitter end, obviously. Also I respect all the work that went into creating this episode. It just wasn’t my kind of tea. Cheers xx