#like he looks normal in every other iteration and then his 20's happened and. And That

[todayisafridaynight]

can’t put into words how much i like comparing masato and daigo so i made a chart to help

[warsofasoiaf]

I'd love to hear your thoughts about Cyberpunk 2077 when you are ready/have finished the game. Maybe besides the game itself you have an opinion about the crunch, bugs and general feeling of disappointment in a good portion of the fans

Sure thing. It’s going to be a long write-up and there are going to be spoilers, so you better believe that this is going to have a cut. Reader beware. For context, I have beat the game, and I played it on PC and only on PC.

I’ve been a fan of the cyberpunk genre for a long time. Transhuman and techno-utopian sci-fi always struck me the wrong way; that it was too optimistic and ignored a less savory element of human nature that simply would not go away with the advent of new technologies. While I only briefly dipped my toes in the water of the Cyberpunk tabletop game (I was always a bigger fan of Shadowrun), I did enjoy the genre and was eager to see a AAA cyberpunk game. I also really liked CD Projekt Red with what they did with RPG’s like the Witcher 3. Particularly when it came to the smaller sidequests, they really found a way to bring a lot of noir elements and hard-hitting character moments to the game, and I believed that it could translate very well into a cyberpunk game. After all, noir was a similar response to detective fiction to what the cyberpunk genre was to earlier elements of sci-fi. So I was quite optimistic when it came out. What we got was...well, it didn’t quite meet up with expectations.

There are some good things about the game. Assuming you have a beefy rig, PC cyberpunk looks pretty good. Not only does it look good, but it looks like the dismal 1980′s inspired future that had defined the genre, with its neon lights, omnipresent advertising to the point of satire (amphetamines are available from vending machines in a variety of flavors and commercials are completely ridiculous). The fixers are great examples of different cyberpunk archetypes like Regina Jones being a media or the Padre being an underclass civic leader looking to protect his community with a bit of a violent streak. Plenty of the characters had great personality, the nomads and Panam were enjoyable, Judy had a great questline that detailed optimism and bitter disappointment (and the character looks cool and is a bit of a cinnamon roll), River’s quest was a perfectly serviceable cop questline with enough horror elements, they were all fine. Keanu wasn’t a great voice actor, but he did serviceably and was apparently just wonderful with the staff, so I’m willing to cut him a pass. The level design can encourage a variety of different play styles, with attribute points opening up certain pathways. Given that it’s an open-world sandbox game, the goal should be to immerse yourself in the world, and touch on elements of cyberpunk as you go through the various quests, and you do see some of that. You see the gross exploitations of dolls in the sex trade when you go to Clouds, the bizarre elements of self-expression that new technologies can offer such as the twins in Kabuki, Pacifica is an abandoned recreation ground for the rich with the nice image of rotting Ferris wheels and abandoned malls, and you can see the divide between the have’s and have-not’s on full display both in the opening (compare and contrast the Street Kid with the Corpo beginnings) or take a look at the Peralez’s penthouse apartment versus Judy’s cramped digs. Honestly, one of my favorite things in the game were just the consumables to highlight the different food and drink available to the people of Night City. The heavy population means that foods like fried ants or locust pepperoni are common, amphetamines are available in a variety of flavors, and there are no less than 20 burrito vending machines on every street (the future is not all bad it seems). I like little worldbuilding moments like this in video games because it does give a sense of completion and immersion within the world. I honestly felt bad for Johnny Silverhand, because by the end of the game I had to be a bloated man-ball of Holobites Peach Pie and Cirrus Cola. 

The game even took a few things that had aged poorly in the cyberpunk genre and improved them. The Mox is a gang specifically meant to stop the Disposable Sex Worker trope, it’s small and part of the reason it survives is that it’s small, but it offers a chance of improvement over the exploitation that the Tyger Claws offer. The cyberpyscho quest is probably the best one of this. Earlier Cyberpunk had cyberpsychosis as a serious concern directly correlated with how many implants you got. The Solo archetype even spoke about how you risk losing your humanity with your implants as you became stronger, better, faster. Even later iterations had depersonalization/derealization disorders as people who could see in the dark lost connection to those who couldn’t. A quick thought in our present though, changes this. My eyesight and hearing is just fine, but I don’t lose connection or common empathy with individuals who are blind or deaf. I have two arms and two legs and I have not lost empathy for amputees. Why then, would I lose empathy and connection with someone with average human eyesight after I get my eyes replaced and now I have the ability to see in the dark or have telescopic sight? The cyberpsycho quest actually took this concept to task; cyberpsychos around the city are seen as horrifying threats that need the high-threat response of MaxTac to deal with, but Regina is looking to see if she can cure cyberpsychosis. Mechanically, the cyberpsychos are boss-fights with elements of puzzle gameplay (how to handle the different skillsets that they have) and a bonus reward for non-lethal damage which rewards certain playstyle archetypes or prepwork for those who ensure that they have a non-lethal option. The information you find around each cyberpyscho showcase different problems in the target’s life, no real common thread or inciting incident that you can trace the onset of cyberpsychosis toward and identify a culprit. After you complete the quest, you learn the twist: there is no such thing as cyberpsychosis. Each of the targets were actually just experiencing different stressors within their lives, such as PTSD, losing their job, drug abuse, etc. and the breakdown is made much worse because these individuals have the ability to toss dumpsters like they were baseballs or pick the wings off a fly with a cybernetically enhanced brain with a .50 cal. Some of these individuals had terrible implant surgery done by bargain-basement ripperdocs and temporarily lost the ability to discern reality from fantasy, something that could easily be seen as a science fiction adaptation of temporary insanity brought on by a poor reaction to medicine. It’s backed up by the game too. V can fill every slot in their cyberware deck but never once experiences cyberpsychosis. Oda has ultra-legs and flaming-hot mantis blades and is in perfect control at every point in the game, even when he’s trying to jab those mantis blade through your sternum. Cyberpyschosis isn’t real, the irresponsible media just ran with it because fear sells. For all the flaws of the game, I respect the game for taking cyberpsychosis in that direction.

But for all those good things, the game couldn’t help but feel shallower than the Witcher 3. The side-gigs were formulaic to the point where they even led with a category. There were few twists and very little that was surprising. Exposition for these quests was limited to a short text dump and a minute voice-over. Night City was big but it was relatively sparse. NCPD never seemed to intervene in any crimes (giving the character the chance to do so) but every so often they were around a taped-off crime scene, giving a sense of inconsistency that hampered the world. While it was a bustling city, it felt empty, most of the people I saw on the street were meaningless, just NPC’s walking around to give a sense of activity. There was little in the way of things to see and experience that was unique or different about these NPC’s. They weren’t crowds I could hide in like Hitman, they didn’t have ambient dialogue that showcased something like the Witcher 3. Much like other open-world games, this sense of shallowness pervaded much of the empty space of the world; it was incredibly *big* but there was little in it. Much of the time I was driving or running through empty space that was completely worthless to me. Normal for city living, but all of that is wasted time going from point A to point B, and unlike the Witcher 3, there were no small in-game beats to help flesh it out or build it. I never had Millie from “Where the Wolf and Cat Play” give me a little picture, I never had people from a liberated village say “hey, look, it’s that guy Geralt, thanks for killing those harpies.” These were things that made the Witcher 3′s world really come alive. I didn’t have that, and I was left

Of course, we also have to handle the elephant in the room, and that was CDPR’s conduct both during production and after release. Crunch has become an increasingly common part of video game development and it’s not healthy to developers. CDPR had been called out on it once before, but it seemed there was little change in how that happens. I’m not quite sure if there’s anything we can do, and I’m sympathetic to the need to hit target deadlines to actually deliver a finished product, but there’s got to be a better way, whether that’s a change to the incentive structure, or something, because it’s hurting folks. I like games like Witcher 3 and Red Dead Redemption 2, but I understand that there was a real human cost to these masterpieces, and I wonder if there’s something we can do about that. 

Similarly, what happened after launch was beyond terrible. The last-gen console version were simply not ready for release and shouldn’t have been released to the public. CDPR openly covered up this, by only previewing the PC version, they hid the fact that the game wasn’t ready, and they avoided delaying the last-gen console version because they were looking to capitalize on holiday sales. I’m sympathetic for the need to generate sales, but the flip of this is that you have to deliver the product you advertise, and for last-gen consoles, they didn’t do so. Bugs are one thing, these games are massive undertakings of interacting systems and bugs are inevitable; some of my favorite games were buggy at release, notably Fallout: New Vegas, Witcher 3, and so on. But this went past bugs and into malpractice and deception, and that’s something that’s less forgivable. I personally had few bugs that were out-and-out game breaking but things not loading, quests bugging out, floating bags and other physics wonkiness, all of that hurt the immersion. I’d be more willing to forgive the game without the deception; I can laugh at bugs but not at ignoring quality control to get holiday sales instead of delivering a quality product. Consumers are angry at CDPR and have every reason to be, and I’m one of them. I can express my disappointment and I will do so, we need developers to stop these practices and the only way we can do that is through our wallets and words. I’m not going to tell anyone not to buy CDPR games, that’s entirely your decision because I’m a radical individualist. But I am going to say that they’ve burned a lot of their good karma with me; credibility is a hard beast to gain back. Much like other big name developers, CDPR has hurt their standing in my eyes. Whether that means I need to resort to going to indie games for a little bit or something else, I don’t know, but it’s rough. I liked CDPR and wanted to believe it’d be different, but it seems to not be the case.

Overall, I think it’s another AAA open-world game only made better by my love of the genre, and that stings. I enjoyed some aspects of it, and I hope that through Free DLC, patching, and other good deeds, the game can redeem itself and stimulate new love of the genre. But CDPR needs to do a lot more than that to win back my affection. If anyone has anything specifically that they want to know about the game, such as talk about the main story, individual characters, or so on, just ask.

Thanks for the question, Khef.

SomethingLikeALawyer, Hand of the King

[hellzyeahthewebwieldingavenger]

2099 Alpha #1 Thoughts

This was a confusing set of teaser trailers.

This is partially a post covering the issue and a rant about the entire premise of the series.

Throughout this comic book (and F4 2099) one prevailing question kept crossing my mind.

 “Who is this even for?”

 It was a question that became louder when I looked at both the cover and the blurb at the back explaining how this project came to be about.

 Matthew Rosenberg, author of the most controversial and derided X-Men run in recent memory (so you know that bodes well), pointed out that 2019 was both the 80th anniversary of Marvel comics (even though most people would argue Marvel truly started in 1961 with F4 #1) and also 80 years away from the real life year 2099.

 The idea was dismissed but then Nick Spencer decided he liked it and after one thing led to another this event was born.

 This event being a ‘reimagining’ of the 2099 universe but with ‘a similar methodology’ to the original 1992 line (that is to say avoiding the ‘common traps’ of descendants of known characters*), with a mind towards how the future was perceived in 2019 vs. 1992.

 Right off the bat there are inherent problems with that entire premise.

 First of all the original 2099 line presented a version of the future that if anything is MORE relevant now than it was in 1992.

 Futurism in any era is never just one thing, but the futurism of 2019 is generally speaking understandably cynical and nihilistic. It’s a world which foresees a future where there isn’t even an illusion of freedom, where the gap between rich and poor has grown even wider than it already is with little-no feasible way to close it, where corporations run the show (more openly than they already do) and where environmental disaster is ravaging mankind if not having already wiped it out. This is to say nothing of a world where artificial intelligence and mechanisation will probably compromise a lot of people’s employment opportunities, and pose direct physical and mental dangers to human lives.

 That is the general ethos of how a lot of people and a lot of fiction reflects the future NOWDAYS. And that’s what the 2099 was doing in 1992! Not only was the line set in the future it was literally ahead of it’s time as the world we live in if anything has grown to reflect it more and more.

  Secondly when you are approaching the notion of making a futuristic version of Spider-Man and the Punisher in the year 2099 and applying the same ‘methodology’ as the LAST time someone tried to make a futuristic version of Spider-Man and the Punisher in the year 2099 the results at best are not going to be that different, rendering the exercise pointless. In fact in all likelihood you are going to be worse or at least derivative. Even if you are not the fact that the 2099 line resonated with people enough for it to continually pop up every so often for nearly 30 years means that your new take is unlikely to hold up to people’s nostalgia.

 And make no mistake, this is a project that exists for nostalgia. It doesn’t exist just for the sake of exploring a possible future for the Marvel universe, otherwise why revive a popular and famous Marvel brand to do it?

 And therein lies my fundamental question.

 If this project exists because people are already invested in 2099 then why reboot it and thus mitigate their emotional investment?

 Nostalgic 2099 fans don’t simply want to see any iteration of these characters. They want something at least mostly in line with the original 1992 iteration, which is why when Spidey 2099 was scheduled for a spin-off in 2014 the fandom spoke with one voice, they wanted Peter David back. And whilst the iteration of Miguel and 2099 as a whole he presented was not identical to the 1992 version(s) it was at least a helluva lot closer than 2009’s Timestorm (a pathetic attempt to essentially do Ultimate 2099) and wound up being more successful as a result.

 This is literally the exact mistake the Nu52 made in that it erased the iterations of the DC characters and DC universe people knew and loved and replaced it with new versions (‘coincidentally’ closer to the versions the DC higher ups knew and loved as kids). It alienated readers to the point where DC Rebirth practically reverse rebooted the Nu52, rendering the characters much closer to their pre-Nu52 counterparts, and in Superman’s case having the pre-Nu52 Superman literally replace his successor.

 With the 2099 event though the attempt at rebooting is even more wrongheaded considering that this isn’t even a lasting universe that might in theory develop new readers over time. It’s a string of connected one shots associated with a Spider-Man story arc. If there is any aftermath to this event at all it will be fairly minimal and at most follow Miguel O’Hara.

 And that brings up the other end of this event’s problems. This holds little appeal to (the already miniscule number of) potential newer fans.

 Consider how this event started. You are a newer fan reading Spencer’s ASM run. You pick up issue #25 and randomly this other Spider-Man looking guy you maybe recognize from some video games and the post-credits scene from Into the Spider-Verse shows up, looking half dead.

 For less than 20 pages across 3 issues you follow him stumbling about spouting nonsense before he delivers some weird line about possible futures (that you’ll only understand if you already know about the 2099 lines) and then he blows up.

 Okay, at best you get the idea. He is a Spider-Man from the future and the present day has erased his future, that’s bad.

 Then you pick this up and you maybe figure out that this Miguel character in this comic book is in fact the same guy, or a VERSION of the same guy you met back in ASM. That’s confusing. It’s confusing because you need to deduce that this issue is the newly rewritten timeline, making your investment in the preceding ASM issues kinda pointless. It might also be confusing because time travel stories tend to be confusing unless written with a lot of clarity.

 But say you just picked THIS up, maybe because you recognized Spidey 2099 on the cover (and god forbid you picked it up due to recognizing the classic 2099 characters).

 Spencer in this comic book doesn’t write a story. He writes a series of teaser vignettes strung together by the Watcher and Doom spouting a load of cryptic nonsense.

 Nothing is explained, nothing is clearly conveyed, the world building is quite frankly awful, you merely get an impression  of this future, you are not actually organically introduced to much of anything. In comparison the first few issues of Spider-Man 2099 already gave you a great idea of what this world of the future was like.

 It’s not just that the presentation is bad and thus likely to alienate newer readers (I was lost with it and I’m familiar with the older 2099 stuff to a degree) but it’s also frankly inferior to the 1992 rendition of the future.

 Perhaps the 1992 Marvel line wasn’t the single most original vision of the future ever conceived, but it at least combined older ideas together and presented a consistent vision. Perhaps the microcosm of the 1992’s vision of the future was the notion of the ravaged ruins of old New York being the foundations upon which new super sky scrapers were built, the rich literally living above the poor.

 But this issue never brings that up, it doesn’t bring up the narrative and literal foundations of the world this takes place in. My personal impression was that this 2099 doesn’t even incorporate such an idea.  It’s a microcosm of how off the rails this reboot is.

 Everything feels downright generic sans the city of traffic and the colony of Thor/Asgardian worshippers.

 Even those are derivative though. Transverse City rips off (a much better executed) idea from a 2007 episode of Doctor Who ‘Gridlock’ which is regarded as something of a modern classic by fans.  And the Thor worshippers was something that came directly from the original 1992 2099 line, but weirdly is being used to tease...Conan the Barbarian???????? Conan hasn’t got anything to do with Thor besides coming from a warrior background. It might as well be Silver Samurai!

 Perhaps the best microcosm of this issue’s failings at world building and presentation, can be found in the opening scene.

 In the scene Thor’s hammer is frequently relocated and seems to be maybe or maybe not moving on it’s own volition. That isn’t to say the story is building in mystery as to whether or not it is moving on it’s own. It’s just that poorly conveyed to the audience. I honestly have little idea what was happening in that scene sans the authorities going to war with Thor’s worshippers.

 The scene also contains a microcosm of this book being for nobody. In said scene a police officer gets their face revealed and is referred to as ‘Jake’. If you didn’t already realize it, this is Jake Gallows, Punisher 2099. He does nothing else in the course of the issue beyond get injured fight and tell his friend a confusing police story. Then the issue ends teasing him as Punisher 2099.

 Like I said nostalgic 2099 fans will be turned off by this on principle because it’s not the character you know and love (his costume will also be different too) but if you are a newer reader...what are you even supposed to make of this? He’s just a random cop, it might as well have been his cop buddy who was the Punisher. It was at best a lame first impression.

And that’s true of virtually EVERY character teased in this comic exempting maybe Ghost Rider 2099.

He at least got a little more personality, you got a little more insight into how he operates, but only as a normal guy not as anything associated with the classic Ghost Rider or the 2099 counterpart you know and love.

Miguel’s background was confusing as he seems to already have his powers but is chummy with his dickhead boss/Dad/archnemesis Tyler Stone and the brief flashbacks to his origin are both different to the original 2099 line and nonsensical.

Conan didn’t even appear to my recollection but he’s still teased.

And the F4 tease was laughable as it didn’t even feature the F4 but rather HERBIE and a newly imagined take on Venture, effectively the first super villain of the 2099 line.

When this event was announced I was sad that Peter David was uninvolved.

But now I see why.

They didn’t want him involved and this is frankly an insult to his and the other 2099 creators’ works.

Don’t read this.

*Gotta love that subtle shade thrown out at the MC2 universe, a universe which lasted longer than the original 2099 line and you know....was way better than this reimagining has been so far. Why does modern Marvel punch down on Spider-Girl.

[shooter-nobunagun]

Quarantine UST 4

//Probably gonna have sexual content scattered throughout the chapters...warning, ero content this time includes some masturbation (though not super explicit)

The ocean breeze felt wonderful, Sio enjoying the cool, briny mist as the car zipped along the shoreline. At last they were taking some time to get out of the house, and although the beaches were closed, it was much better than spending yet another day cooped up inside.

“Aaah, this feels soo nice...it really is too bad we can’t go down to the beach itself.” Sighing, the sniper rested her head against the window, letting the wind blow through her hair. There were few other vehicles along the road, and though Mahesh jokingly suggested to Adam (who was driving) that he should test the limits of this car, they only sped up a few times on straight stretches when nobody else was around.

The car wasn’t exactly designed to be sporty, but Adam revved the engine a few times as he shifted the gears with amazing accuracy, Sio shrieking with delight as they blew down the straightaways. “Who would’ve thought you’d also be a speed freak,” Mahesh teased in good humor, the sniper blushing but she wouldn’t deny it was thrilling.

“W-Well, it’s not like I’d go around doing that, normally...besides, Tokyo’s no place to drive, not with all the public transit. Not that I can drive anyways...”

“Sounds like London, honestly. Though I suppose if you had a motorbike it’d be a tad easier to get around. Like Adam—you had one back in London, didn’t you?” Jess queried.

“And so what if I did? ‘S not like it’ll do us any good out here.”

“No, but maybe when the opportunity comes up you can take Sio-chan for a ride; I’m sure she’d enjoy it.” The sniper turned red as a tomato at that comment, and Adam made an odd noise in his throat.

“A-Anyway, we can worry about that later; is there a place where we can get out for a bit? Or are they all closed?” Sio desperately changed the subject, not wanting to get into yet another fit of ‘why do I feel so hot when talking about Adam’.

“According to local news, we may be able to get off and walk around the trail head, so long as we have masks and maintain distance,” Mahesh reported. As soon as they parked to a stop Sio opened the door and breathed in the fresh air. Adam’s driving was impeccable, especially for stick-shift, but she had to admit the winding hills of San Francisco were making her just a touch carsick. 

“Oy squirt, don’t forget your mask; can’t be careless,” Adam chided as he handed the sniper hers, “let’s not get complacent.” Sio blushed with embarrassment, but was grateful Adam didn’t make snide remarks anymore. In fact, ever since he granted her permission to call him by his real first name, he seemed to have mellowed out quite a bit. There were several instances where they’d even been able to have small talk, mostly during times like cleaning up or when she insisted on helping with cooking (so she could learn was her argument), but it no longer felt as forced or awkward.

‘Hopefully this quarantine will get him to open up a bit more...’cause Adam, he’s really not a bad guy once you get to know him...sure he’s a little rough around the edges, but who doesn’t have something they’re trying to improve?’

“What’re you thinking about, Sio?” The blonde suddenly appeared in her view, Sio jumping back a bit on instinct; luckily ever since that discussion, she’d been a lot better about giving the girl her space. After that outburst, Adam called for a squad meeting to lay down some ground rules, including very explicit warnings that harassment of any kind, malicious or otherwise, was not to be tolerated.

‘An’ I don’t give a shit if that’s what you’re used to, but I will not condone any such behavior moving forward, pandemic or not; do I make myself clear?’ 

The other three members nodded solemnly as their leader gave them all a stern look. Both Jess and Mahesh were unusually serious for once, perhaps even remorseful as Adam lectured them on their unsavory behaviors. The sniper couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty; but afterwards, when they were all going to bed and both came by personally to apologize, she knew she’d done the right thing.

“Ah, n-not much...just once again, kind of amazed at how Adam can do...well, pretty much anything,” the girl muttered. “Stick-shift, motorcycles...that’s so cool. Maybe I’m just too young to learn about all these things, right now...”

“Hmm, I wouldn’t say that, dear. You were in your last year of secondary, correct?” Sio nodded. “He’s not that much older, you know. Adam, I mean. If I recall, they picked him up right after he got into university, a year or two before we discovered you.”

Sio’s eyes widened in surprise. So Adam really wasn’t that much older than her, though he sure acted way more mature. “Really? I didn’t know that...I’d always assumed, he’d been with DOGOO forever...”

“Some people grow up faster, depending on their circumstances. That’s all there is to it,” Jess shrugged. “I’m actually one of the earlier members of DOGOO...well, the first among the Second Platoon, anyway.”

She turned around in shock. “Wait, you’re the first member of the Second Platoon?!”

“Sort of. It’s a bit...complicated,” the blonde suddenly looked hesitant. “...If you must know, there was actually a ‘first iteration’, so to speak. Before any of us came along...well, technically that’s not true; I was with DOGOO pretty early on, but not as part of the Second Platoon...”

The sniper stayed quiet as the blonde muttered to herself. So, there had been an earlier version of their platoon? ‘But then what happened? Where are they now? Are they still with DOGOO?’

“You know old man Capa, right?” Sio nodded. “He, along with e-gene holders William Tell and Christopher Columbus...comprised of the original Second Platoon. But then...”

“Then...?” She definitely had not forgotten (nor forgiven) Capa’s trespasses, but she’d only ever heard of William Tell in passing, and Sio didn’t even know Columbus existed. “But Capa’s retired now, isn’t he? Did those two also retire?”

For some reason Jess grew somber at her question. “...William Tell is now part of the Special Squad, same as Hunter and Galileo. And Columbus...he—”

“Oy, what’s the hold up you two? Don’t fall behind!” From far ahead, their leader’s voice barked at the two girls.

“Nevermind. I’ll tell you that story some other time. Let’s go before he loses his temper, again.” Jess rolled her eyes as the two picked up the pace. Sio was dying to know just what happened, but given Jess’ reaction, it was probably better she didn’t pry anymore.

“Doesn’t he ever stop yelling at people?” Sio grumbled as they finally caught up with the guys. “Seriously, and here I thought we were making some progress on being civil with each other...”

“Adam’s not the type to have a heart-to-heart, but I must say, you must be doing him some good. In all the time I’ve known him, I’ve never seen him quite so relaxed as when he’s around you.” Jess winked, causing the sniper to blush. “Seems to me you’ve got a secret touch around him...”

“J-Jess-san...! I-I don’t, I don’t think so...” Her cheeks were still pink though, even as they wandered around the trail, everyone else taking in the sights of the ocean.

“Hmm? Really...well, regardless he’s definitely loosened up a bit. Less scowling, and I think I actually saw him smile the other day! Or was that just a smirk,” Jess mused as the two girls walked along the path. 

‘It can’t be; I-I mean, it’s only because now we’re taking a break from all those battles and stuff that he can relax, so naturally it’s a lot easier to chat with him...isn’t it? Why would he be particularly nice to me?’ The sniper continued to be lost in her thoughts as the group hiked along the cliffs. She hadn’t been paying much attention, but now that she thought about it, Adam’s behavior towards Jess and Mahesh hadn’t changed that much (he was still griping about their lack of modesty), but she definitely noticed a change in his tone of voice and words around her.

No way...it can’t be true, are we becoming...friends?!

Even Asao-san brought it up last night, after the sniper spent a solid 30 minutes regaling about how Adam taught her three different ways to make eggs. ‘So, I see someone’s getting cozy with their leader, yeah? Good thing you guys aren’t regular military—’cause I’m pretty sure fraternizing with your squadmates would be a big no-no’ her friend had teased, which lead to another 20 minutes of sputtering and denial.

‘Yeah, well, didn’t the Commander say this would be a good opportunity to get to know each other and strengthen bonds? I’m just doing that,’ Sio thought to herself, though that didn’t exactly explain why her pulse increased and her body got hot whenever she stared at Adam or thought about him too much. ‘And yeah, I’ll admit he’s...pretty hot, and physically I find him attractive...b-but that’s completely normal! I’m a growing, girl, I have...needs...’

As if on cue her loins throbbed slightly, to Sio’s horror. Ever since she discovered masturbating, it had become something of a nightly activity for her; doubling as both a sleep aid and stress reliever. (And also, hey, it felt really fucking good.) Groaning, she forced herself to act normal and tag along with the rest of the group, though she was definitely going to need some ‘alone time’ as soon as they got back. ------ “Phew, that was a pleasant outing...see Adam, going out every once in a while isn’t going to kill us,” Jess commented as they finally made it back to the house, after stopping by for some takeout from a seaside shack. According to the Brits, the fish and chips were almost as good as any chippy establishment in London. Almost. Naturally Sio, not being familiar with British food, found it to be extremely tasty, and even Adam begrudgingly admitted that Americans could do a few things right, on occasion.

“Why’s it in pieces though, it’s better when the fish is whole...”

“Next time we should try curry; I’ve heard this area’s got a ton of Indian restaurants,” Mahesh suggested. “I’d be curious to see if any of them can actually do ‘Indian spicy’...”

“I, Indian spicy?” The sniper shuddered a bit at that description. Japanese people weren’t exactly the best with spicy food, despite wasabi. “Not sure I wanna find out what that means...”

Mahesh winked at her. “Well, you’ll just have to find out for yourself, Sio. Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll be fine.” The sniper doubted that, but Indian curry did sound good. Hopefully there would be milder options as well.

“What should we do about dinner? Do we want to do delivery again, or is our esteemed leader going to grace us with his home cooking?” The Indian managed to once again dodge a fork from the silver-haired man. “Hey now, I’m being serious! You’re becoming quite the cook, Adam. It’s a wonder we went all this time without sampling any of your dishes.

Adam grumbled, but Sio noticed his ears were turning slightly pink. Was he...bashful? It was bizarre to see their acerbic leader act so shy, but it was nice for a change, she decided. And kind of cute.

“Do you know how to cook, Mirza-san?”

The Indian turned to their sniper with a start. “Me? Cook? Oh, well I can...but I have to admit, ever since I joined DOGOO I haven’t had much time. Or a reason. It’s a lot simpler when someone else prepares things for you...”

“Like your servants?” Adam snorted, hinting at the Indian’s wealthy background. “You just snap your fingers and someone comes running, eh?”

“I’m not that dependent,” Mahesh’s gaze narrowed, slightly offended. “Just because I grew up with hired help doesn’t mean I can’t do things for myself. I just prefer doing things in the most efficient manner. In any case, if you are interested in trying my cooking, Sio-chan, I’d be happy to make something.”

“O-Oh, well, I don’t want you to go out of your way or anything—”

“Nonsense; after all, it seems like we’re all using this time to try new things, no? Plus it might be nice to give it a go...maybe we can even have some kind of group cooking night.”

The rest of the platoon murmured in agreement, though Sio was a bit nervous. She’d barely just managed to cook eggs decently, there was no way she could whip up something as fancy as Adam or probably even Mahesh could.

“Well, you can count me out, unless you want food poisoning,” Jess commented dryly. “I’m not going to deny it, but cooking is definitely not one of my stronger skills...”

“You can be my sous-chef,” Mahesh gave a cheeky grin, which was met with a napkin to the face. “Oof, I’m sure you’ll do fine. Just leave the actual cooking part to me. So, it seems we’ve decided then? We’re cooking?”

Sio nodded, starting to warm up to the idea. It might even be fun, if everybody pitched in. “I-I mean, I can only make eggs, but...I’d be happy to help.”

“You can never go wrong with eggs. Don’t worry Sio-chan; now, to make sure I don’t decimate your taste buds with vindaloo...I guess I’ll make tikka masala as well. What’re you thinking of cooking, Adam?”

Their leader gave a noncommittal grunt. “Eh, don’t expect anythin’ fancy. Probably Shepard's pie tonight, glazed carrots.”

Even though they’d just eaten lunch, Sio’s mouth was watering just at the descriptions of those dishes. Dinner was bound to be good tonight; she couldn’t wait to try and sample some more Indian and British cuisine, and vowed to do her best to make enough fried eggs and toast for everybody. 

“By the way, do you think we can do something before dinner? I kinda wanted to try some of those board games we found...”

“Oh, that’s a brilliant idea Sio! I think we’ve earned a bit of entertainment. One can only watch so much Netflix...” The group had played a few card games already, but board games were the next level. Sio wasn’t familiar with any of them beyond Monopoly, but the other members assured her there were much better prospects. 

“Mirza, Beckham, how about you two clean up for a change; Ogura and I aren’t your servants,” Adam gave the two a knowing look. “Speaking of which Ogura, you wanted me to spot you today at training, right?”

“O-Oh! R, Right, I almost forgot...thanks.” The petite girl quickly changed into her workout clothes and the two trooped into the exercise room, Mahesh and Jess staring and waiting until the two of them disappeared from view.

“...Oh yeah, there’s definitely something going on between the two. I’ll bet you a quid before the end of this quarantine they’ll be shagging.”

Mahesh laughed. “That’s a pretty bold assumption; I don’t doubt they’ll get together eventually, but in only a few weeks? That’s pretty quick...for both of them.” It was pretty obvious that Sio never had a boyfriend or even much friends before all this, and despite how secretive Adam was with his private life, Mahesh was pretty sure if their leader ever had a lover, he’d have caught wind of it by now. “I have a pretty good hunch this would be a first time for both of them...and given that neither of them are great with their feelings...”

“You don’t trust my feminine instincts?”

“I never said that. In any case, you’re on.” ------- “Ugh...twenty-seven...twenty-eight...twenty...nine...thir...thirty!” Heaving a sigh of relief, Sio let the weights clash onto the stand, her arms feeling like limp noodles after that rep. Her limit had increased by 5 lbs since the beginning, and she could now do 30 reps without stopping, but that was nothing compared to Adam; last time he did 50 reps with almost twice the weight, and barely broke a sweat. “Whew, my arms are gonna be sore tomorrow...”

“Not bad, Ogura. You’ve improved; I can tell your form is much better than when you first started,” Adam nodded in satisfaction as they switched spots. “This should help with your accuracy, so you can better control your shots—instead of firing all over the place.”

“H-Hey! I’m not that bad anymore...not that I’m hoping for an attack to prove my point,” Sio muttered, helping Adam lift the bar up as she spotted for him.

“No, you aren’t...but you’ve got a ways to go, squirt,” he grunted as he started his set. “If we let our guard down for even a second...I don’t wanna think about that.”

“...Do you think this war is going to be that bad?”

Adam eyed her with a stare as he lifted the weight. “...Honestly, I don’t know. It’s not something I like to think about...but I’d rather prepare for the worst case scenario, in case this does end up being some long-term fight.”

Sio nodded. “Yeah, you’re right...heh, it’s strange; out of everyone, I probably have the best e-gene suited for warfare and strategy...and yet, when I really think about it, like, it hits me—holy crap, we’re actually fighting against freaking aliens from outer space, who really are out to just destroy us all. How the heck am I supposed to figure that out...” The sniper grew melancholy as she recalled that conversation with Asao in the hospital, right after Taiwan. “...Even now, I still can’t believe...this is happening. That, this is the state of our lives, now...”

“...Do you regret joinin’ DOGOO?”

“Huh? W-Well, no...I,” the sniper paused, looking away slightly. “I...even though I was scared, I also knew in my heart it was something I wanted to do. No, it was something I needed to do,” she emphasized. “If I just went back and pretended nothing changed...I’d never forgive myself.”

“Heh...a sense of...duty, ‘ey?” Adam let out a breath as he finished the rep, Sio helping him return the bar to its resting place. “I think that’s what drew most of us here, in the first place. No matter what folks say about other motivations or whatnot...in the end, if you don’t have that kind of inner conviction, you wouldn’t have lasted this long in the first place.”

“Mn.” Though he wasn’t directly complimenting her, for some reason, hearing his words made her feel warm. “You definitely have that, Adam-san.”

“Oh, uh...sure.” If the sniper was looking his way, she would’ve seen a slight blush on his cheeks; but as it was she was busy wiping down the equipment and looking at the pull-up bar with dread. “Anyway, let’s see if you can get more than 5 today.”

“Aww, seriously? I just did a bunch of weights too...” She whined, but one stern look from Adam and she sighed, and got into position. “S, Seriously...h-how do, people, do...this...! O-One...!”

“Less talking, more breathing. Don’t waste your breath; remember your breathing patterns,” Adam coached, as Sio strained to lift her chin over the bar. “C’mon, yeh that’s it, three more to go.”

After the fifth one Sio gasped as her hand slipped, her grip too weak to hold on. “Whoa—!” 

“Careful—!” Adam caught her just in the nick of time, Sio squinting her eyes open. “You alright, squirt?”

“Un...y-yeah, sorry about that...guess I’m pretty tired out.” She laid there for a bit, palms stinging from exertion. Adam nodded, but interestingly he didn’t set her down, instead letting her rest in his arms for a bit.

There was something soothing about it, being held by someone; granted this wasn’t the first time he’d held her, but that had been during a mission, with plenty of stakes and yelling. This time though, Sio became acutely aware of everything else; including how strong his arms were, and the sound of his breath, the heat from his skin, his heartbeat... Suddenly those odd tingles came back again, Sio now squirming with the uncomfortable realization that she was feeling ‘this’ again.

‘Seriously body, you do this to me now?! Screw you, hormones...’

“A-Ah, I’m feeling better now...thanks,” she stood on wobbly legs as Adam set her down. “Well, at least I did five...”

“Yeh. Anyway, if you’re tired, you can go up and take a shower first. I’m just gonna finish up here,” Adam launched himself up onto the bars.

“O-Oh, it’s okay, I can wait. I mean, it’d be rude of me to not finish spotting for you, since I asked you first...”

There’s not much to spot for pull-ups, Adam thought, but he didn’t say anything. If the squirt wanted to hang around, it was her choice. Though, he felt a bit self-conscious with her just staring at him; for some reason he felt like he had to impress her, even though he was dead tired himself and suddenly 15 seemed almost impossible.

But his pride would never let him live it down, and so 15 pull-ups it was.

As Adam forced himself through the punishment of 15 reps, Sio sat on the bench and watched him. His form was nearly perfect, barely even a tremble as he lifted and lowered himself at an even rate. ‘Damn, I wonder how long it’ll take before my muscles are that strong...speaking of muscles, holy crap his arms are so buff! No wonder he could carry me like that...also those abs...’ She tried not to stare so intensely, but it wasn’t her fault all holders had to wear what were essentially crop tops underneath their armor.

‘I wonder what they feel like...’ Her head flushed and Sio felt her heart rate speed up. ‘No no, stop thinking horny thoughts! Bad Sio!’ To her relief, Adam finished his set, and she could finally head back up to to the privacy of her own room.

“O, Otsukaresama desu; thanks for helping me out today, Adam-san.”

“You did well, Ogura. Who knows, maybe we will get called to action and you’ll get a chance to prove me wrong with your aim,” he teased, grinning slightly as he wiped off the sweat.

“What?! Oh just you wait, mister, I’ll show you!”

Adam chuckled to himself as the girl stomped off with a huff. She really was too cute not to tease. Admittedly he did feel a little bad for always bursting her bubble right at the peak, but he couldn’t help it. Her reactions and those pouty lips were just too good.

‘An’ since when did you start caring so much about that squirt, ‘ey?’ He took a long, hard look at himself in the mirror. ‘Or is it because that’s the only way you know how to defuse the situation before you get too close—’

No. Those were dangerous thoughts. While not strictly forbidden, common sense said fraternizing with one’s teammates was always a risky affair. Adam shook his head and got in the shower, making sure to turn the tap to cold. Not only was it hot, but a certain...other part of his body was stirring, especially after holding the girl. The feeling of her warm, heavy weight in his arms, the soft skin and even a certain scent; not sweat, but a distinctly human odor...

Adam groaned softly as he took hold of his member. It was already hot and stiff, despite the cold shower. ‘Shit, so much for that...you really are a pervert, aren’t yeh?’ But he couldn’t help it; it’d been weeks since he’d been able to let off any steam, and staying in close quarters with everybody else 24/7 made it hard to ensure much privacy. 

Hoping nobody needed to use the toilet, he started stroking himself; water poured over his throbbing length as his hand squeezed and pulled, Adam biting back another moan as he slowly jerked himself off. The sniper had definitely been staring at him when they were working out. ‘Don’t think I didn’t notice those wandering eyes, hanninmae...’ Initially, he’d been a bit surprised she’d be so bold; but then again when she’d walked in on him the very first time before their first mission, she hadn’t looked away, either.

‘Does this mean she’s...interested? Or am I just another body to her?’ His jaw ached from trying to keep his voice down, Adam trembling as he edged towards his climax. ‘No, it’s only...natural, when you spend so much time together, with the same people...it can’t be...’

But what if she is? A little voice rang in his head and Adam, already hazy with lust, decided to indulge that fantasy a bit. What if Sio Ogura really was interested in him, beyond just teammates or even friends? At this point, he didn’t doubt that they would be on friendly terms after this quarantine, but anything more?

Is this something she wants? Is this something I want?

To go from comrades to friends, to something more than that... Funnily enough, the thought of entering a relationship with her made him even harder than simply thinking about her lithe, slender body. ‘Impossible...am I...actually falling for her?!’

“W-Well, that’s why I’m learning now, aren’t I? So I can do it myself.”

“Th-thanks for helping me, again...heh, it seems like that’s all I’m doing these days...”

“You definitely have that, Adam-san. Conviction.”

“Guh—! Fuck...!” Hand pumping rapidly, Adam came hard as those large maroon eyes firmly embedded itself in his mind, along with that rare, shy smile she only showed around him. So cute. She was so cute whenever she tried so hard, determined to prove him wrong and do her best to improve...well, anything. A sudden rush of heat bloomed from his core, a low moan tearing from his throat as the last of his spunk shot out, chills running up and down his spine.

The effect one petite sniper could have on him...

“Shit...oh fuck...” Heaving, he rinsed off the mess from his hands and the shower walls, before finally turning off the water. The post-orgasm haze was settling in, causing everything to be slightly out-of-focus as Adam slowly towelled off. “Goddammit Adam, you’re really fucked now...”

Even as his mind argued with himself that it was just because he needed to relieve some stress, and she did have a pretty nice body, Adam knew in his heart that wasn’t the real reason. No, before his brain even realized it, his heart had already made the decision; perhaps even before all this virus business.

He was falling in love the Sio Ogura. And there was nothing he could do but take it and run with it.

[lamarmcarter]

A WNBA Wishlist for NBA 2K21 & Beyond

The current state of the world has created newfound time for many of us while we wait for sports to resume and, much more importantly, life to return to some semblance of normal.

To pass the time, and to follow the recent buzz created by the 2020 WNBA Draft, I have taken a deep dive into NBA 2K20’s WNBA integration and created a wishlist of features for the next iterations of the game. The first year of WNBA in 2K surpassed EA Sports’ two-year head start with NBA Live 18 and Live 19 on a number of fronts; that said, for 2K to bring the integration up to the standard W fans deserve and their industry-leading NBA simulation has created, I’ve logged these 20 things need to be added as soon as possible:

Fix the In-Game Commentary Audio One of the most glaring issues for 2K20 with the WNBA were the multiple instances of the in-game announcers misgendering player actions (using “he/him/his” instead of “she/her/hers”). I haven’t heard any actions in NBA modes using female wording so hearing it in the W games makes the mode feel a bit unprofessional. There are some times where these mentions could just be unclear pronunciations, but even that happening in a game where there is usually so much polish on the commentary is a problem. I’ve had fellow gamers on Twitter confirm that this has happened to them so it’s definitely not an isolated incident.

Choose more recognizable and more diverse announcers The all-male trio of announcers in the WNBA modes did an admirable job providing commentary in the games. While I generally enjoyed their commentary (sans point No.1) and it seemed to get better after launch, sometimes their insights into players were a bit formulaic (a descriptor, player name, another descriptor). Initially, hearing these anecdotes about the players was refreshing but noticing this recurring template was disheartening after a while. Also, in a game that has a wide mix of recognizable, veteran NBA announcers on the men’s side and sports the great Doris Burke among that mix, it was hard to understand how the WNBA mode only possessed an all-male crew unknown in WNBA circles.

A list of seasoned WNBA/women’s basketball announcers that should be approached for 2K21 and beyond include but are not limited to: LaChina Robinson, Kara Lawson, Rebecca Lobo, Adam Amin, Ryan Ruocco, Christy Winters-Scott, Carolyn Peck, Doris Burke, Holly Rowe (who could also serve in David Aldrige’s sideline role), Cheryl Miller, Debbie Antonelli, Pam Ward, Rosalyn Gold-Onwude, Maria Taylor, and Ann Meyers.

Add the pre-game/post-game shows If any of the veteran announcers could be added to 2K21, it would make perfect sense to create a pre-game/post-game panel package for the W. Any grouping of those announcers could easily create analysis for the teams and give the women the same treatment that Shaq, Kenny Smith, and Ernie Johnson give the men.

Extend the season mode past one season Being able to play a full season in 2K20 was one of the game’s best features. However, knowing that you couldn’t go into multiple years like in NBA MyLeague was disappointing. Knowing this, I still grinded through a season with the Las Vegas Aces from launch until a few weeks ago (for the record: 27-7, Liz Cambage as MVP and Finals MVP, and a title!) only to be left with the empty feeling of not being able to have my curated team (with a few late season trades) run it back in future years. Maybe the full 80-year NBA MyLeague treatment can’t be done, but having the auto draft classes, progressions, and offseason items necessary for a 15-25 year run should be doable.

Allow for creation of female players, custom rosters and draft classes As more and more attention is given to women’s basketball in this social media age, devoted fans may want to create draft classes of future college stars like NBA fans already do. Adding the option to create female players - individually or en masse - is necessary to allow for longer engagement with the league in the game. Outside of visualizing future players, being able to save and load custom rosters is also needed. This year’s one-season MyLeague would have been more bearable if I didn’t have to manually alter any fantasy rosters I wanted to experiment with every time I started a season.

Add a MyCareer storyline/path for Female MyPlayers to make the league In past editions of 2K and past versions of the Madden NFL franchise, game creators have worked around the NCAA’s old name, image and likeness restrictions by getting basic licenses from colleges to use their logos with generic rosters in MyCareer-type modes. Madden NFL 20’s Face of the Franchise mode particularly stood out: your QB chose a college to go to, and then as a senior played against two schools in the College Football Playoff semis and final.

A similar setup could be created for a Female MyCareer story: get a team license for 4-8 of the top women’s college basketball teams and have the created player go through the latter stages of the NCAA tourney before getting drafted to the W. Someone could create a player, choose from the licensed schools to commit, play a handful of games versus the other licensed schools (and their auto-generated rosters) in big moments over four years, and end by going through top teams as a senior (either with or without graduated alums in the W; imagine having to face Sabrina Ionescu, Satou Sabally, Ruthy Hebard and Oregon or Tyasha Harris, Mikiah Herbert Harrigan, Dawn Staley and South Carolina for the title to set your draft stock). Simulate the draft with Commissioner Cathy Engelbert like it’s done with NBA Commissioner Adam Silver, and roll right into your season with the same bells and whistles as a male MyPlayer.

Allow Female MyPlayer into the Neighborhood/Park areas I personally don’t play too much of the online Park games in 2K (another story for another day) but just like on basketball courts around the world, if female MyPlayers are available, they should be able to run with the guys. The Neighborhood could be broken up three ways: a portion for guys only runs, a section for girls only runs, and a co-ed section. Give the female MyPlayers the same access to all the perks of the Neighborhood (gear, the Gatorade training center, MyCourt, etc).

Allow for Playoff Only Mode The WNBA Playoffs are probably the most unique in all of the major sports leagues. Adding a Playoff only mode to the season mode would allow for more content to be created and simulations to be run, especially if All-Time and Classic teams are added.

Continue to improve on strong face scan data 2K’s face scans were great out the gate in both quality and quantity. Continuing to improve on that start to gain 100 percent accuracy has to be the goal. Scanning sessions will probably be difficult in the current age of coronavirus, but if fans can scan their faces in the game with an app, I’m sure something can be done with the W’s players remotely.

Scan in and/or properly gender each head coach We heard that some WNBA coaches - if not all - were scanned for 2K20 but none of them are in the game. If correcting this can’t be done in 2K21, at least put in generic stand ins of the correct gender and race. Example: Minnesota (Cheryl Reeve - white woman) and Las Vegas (Bill Laimbeer - white man) both have black male avatars as their head coaches in the game. All 12 coach avatars in the game are men and even though there are more male coaches than female ones in the league, the virtual stand-ins are still incorrect. If the game could get unique scans for cheerleaders and female characters in MyCareer, I’m sure some stand in men and women could be added if the WNBA coaches can’t be added like their NBA counterparts.

Align commentator and arena PA announcer pronunciations A subtle tweak: making sure the game announcers and the in-arena PAs are announcing players’ names correctly. I’ve heard some very off names on both sides

Halftime: show team stats screen for longer than four seconds When I’m in a game and want to look at the halftime stats to figure out how I’m doing, I’ve felt rushed because the team stats graphic that shows in-between halves comes down just as quickly as it goes up.

Allow for online Play Now The NBA and 2K found a way to entertain its fans during our quarantine with online competitions that were aired on TV. If the WNBA season is postponed or cancelled, the league cannot facilitate a similar tournament in 2K20 because the only way for two people to faceoff with W teams is in the offline Play Now mode. Bringing in an online option will expand opportunities for fans to learn about the WNBA players and teams.

The defending champion Washington Mystics recently decided to do streams of their games on 2K but only as CPU vs CPU simulations instead of remote player vs player. Not having the ability to play someone else online limited their options and engagement opportunities. 

WNBA Finals: actually put in a celebration sequence As I (proudly) mentioned, I won the title in my LVA season and after the final game, there was a quick CHAMPIONS graphic...and that’s it. No trophy celebrations, no locker room celebrations, nothing. In my semifinals win to get to the Finals, the NBA “conference trophy” cutscenes played postgame at least. Adding that touch would surely be appreciated by the W community.

Double check player cutouts Jordin Canada (SEA) won an award in my LVA season and her player image was Jewell Loyd. It’s the only error I’ve personally seen on the player cutouts but checking those are important.

All-Time Teams and Past Champions Adding Classic WNBA teams and/or legends via All-Time teams would be the ultimate way to honor the league’s history and give old and new fans that pick up 2K a virtual time capsule of the W. My suggestions would be to add:

Champions and Runners-Up from every year (1997-present)

All-Time Teams that go 10-12 deep (I took a crack at suggestions here): https://bit.ly/2xFW2HL. I’m sure some W writers with deeper knowledge than mine could fill in the blanks.

Add a 2K League connection/element Tying back into the online Play Now mode, incorporating the NBA 2K League with WNBA action would be amazing. Either have the 2KL teams do special tourneys using W teams; create events or a full league for the W that has to be at minimum 75% women (because, shoot, I’d want to play too!); or do WNBA player-specific events. Imagine how cool it would be to see Aerial Powers and Allisha Gray going at it as themselves in 2K instead of just picking NBA teams.

Put in some general trade logic Currently, any trades in the MyLeague mode are set to automatically go through, no matter how outrageous. Some basic trade logic (at minimum based on overalls, salary and position) would be nice to give things a realistic feel.

Fix the jerseys screen in season In WNBA Play Now, when you go to adjust jerseys, there’s a graphic with WNBA players in the background. In Season, that graphic is of NBA players.

Honor Gigi Bryant, Payton Chester, and Alyssa Altobelli, and Kobe Bryant Follow Commissioner Engelbert’s lead and find a way to honor Gigi and her Mamba Academy teammates. Maybe permission can be granted to create older versions of the girls to be placed into the game’s free agent pool.

At minimum, having some kind of graphic commemoration would be classy (maybe banners throughout the game or at Staples for Sparks games, since they were California natives). There’s also been the obvious rumblings of putting Kobe and Gigi on the cover. That would be amazing. If that can’t be done, a cover with Kobe and a WNBA player he was close to (Ionescu, Diana Taurasi, Loyd) would be fitting.

I do not want this list to diminish what 2K has excelled at with its first run with the WNBA. The gameplay is fun and true to form, the graphics are high quality, a very large amount of the face scans are on point, being able to play a full season is an excellent touch, and the features that are in the game are strong. However, 2K as a whole has a decades-long reputation for putting out a pace-setting game every year so wanting the WNBA’s section of it to be fully developed is something every true basketball fan can agree on.

I can’t wait to see which of these suggestions or others are implemented. What features would you want added for the WNBA?

[jobrosupdates]

Nowstalgia: Jonas Brothers' Second Coming

Story by Jael Goldfine / Photography by Robin Harper / Styling by Britt McCamey

On a conference call, the morning after the Met Gala, Nick Jonas divides his and his brothers' career in two: before and after Disney Channel first aired the "Year 3000" music video in 2007. Before "things weren't working," afterwards "it all came together." In the infamous clip, a 15-year-old Nick, 18-year-old Joe and 20-year-old Kevin, dressed in Converse and graphic tees (Joe in camouflage, Nick and Kevin in Ed Hardy) fall into a portal in a suburban living room, shimmering with CGI sparkles like an Instagram filter. They emerge enthused to find that, among other developments, in the future they are rock stars wearing matching suits, with a pile of magazine covers and a new album that outsold Kelly Clarkson.

We are on the phone, along with Joe and Kevin, to talk about The Jonas Brothers' surprise reunion and their first album in six years, Happiness Begins. Much like the rest of the world, however, I am fascinated by their past.

Like The Jonas Brothers' second coming, "Year 3000" is an intoxicating orgy of nostalgia for anyone who lived through their genesis: malls were in their heyday, technology was magical, not terrifying, Instagram was a prototype on a jewel-colored Mac desktop in Silicon Valley, and Kelly Clarkson was the gold standard for album sales. The prophetic song feels self-congratulatory now, but at the time, it represented a fantasy. The Jonas Brothers didn't know that they'd spend much of their adolescence in matching suits, or that their next album would, indeed, crush Clarkson's corresponding My December in sales that year.

Without that video — a cover of British pop-punk band Busted, whose original lyrics envisioned a future full of triple-breasted women, instead of cute space girls with Star Wars buns — we might never have met The Jonas Brothers. Their debut album It's About Time had middled out on Columbia (it would later become a fan favorite), while they spent a couple years opening for their teen idol forbearers: Jesse McCartney, the Backstreet Boys, Jump5 and The Cheetah Girls. It was only after "Year 3000" went "viral" (in the way things did in 2007, conducted via hallway chatter and YouTube-binging sleepovers, alongside clips like "Salad Fingers," Shoes" and "Charlie Bit Me") that Disney realized Nick, Joe and Kevin, with their unthreatening good looks, nuclear New Jersey normalness, and formidable skills with guitars and microphones, were the perfect raw material for their cottage industry of boys and girls next door.

They released their breakout second album The Jonas Brothers on Disney's label, Hollywood Records later that year. Quickly, they saturated the Disney multiverse and the lives of early-to-mid 2000's suburban youth. They made a guest appearance on Hannah Montana that broke cable records. Their songs could be heard in Aquamarine, Zoey 101, on Cartoon Network's Friday program, and leaking out of iPod minis, mall speakers, high school gyms and 100,000-seat stadiums. The Camp Rock series, entanglements with other famous teenagers, various concert films and their sitcom, Jonas, followed.

Nostalgia is an inescapable fog hanging around Nick, Joe and Kevin, as the world watches them tease each other on TV hosts' couches and jump around in matching suits again, for the first time in six years. It's not just about them. That bedazzled, low-rise moment is on everyone's minds. An avalanche of blog posts about their reunion begin with some iteration of the pseudo-incredulous question: "Avril Lavigne, JoJo and Ashley Tisdale are dropping albums, Amanda Bynes is back, Lindsay Lohan is making TV and The Jonas Brothers are getting back together. Is it 2019 or 2009?" PAPER recently debuted a column, called "This Week In 2009," to feed our appetite for photos of Rihanna with a momager haircut, andSpencer Pratt and Heidi Montag making out in surgical masks during the swine flu panic. The Jonas Brothers have already made it into several installments. The guys confirm they did not engineer their reunion to sync up with our cultural nostalgia cycle, but due to it, talking about the good old days will be an extra compulsory aspect of their press tour. At 26, 29 and 31, The Jonas Brothers aren't unwilling, but a bit ambivalent about rehashing their adolescence.

"We're not really defined by those years," Nick claims, when I ask the trio about how they look back on the fever pitch of the JoBro craze. But when I nudge, he admits the period was undeniably influential. "We had a lot of fun... you know, it was sort of a rocket ship to the moon during that time. When Disney played our video for 'Year 3000,' everything changed. It all started to happen when Disney got on board. Our years doing Camp Rock and TV shows were really formative."

It's not that The Jonas Brothers are at odds with their origin story. They'll soon release a glossy Amazon documentary reliving it, and this past weekend, gave a euphoric rendition of their 2008 hit "Burnin' Up" at their first SNL performance in a decade. But they've previously indicated otherwise. "I don't feel as frustrated now as I did then," Joe says of a candid as-told-to essay he gave New York Magazine in 2013, a few months after the band's break-up. He wrote then, "Being a part of the Disney thing for so long will make you not want to be this perfect little puppet forever." He detailed an authoritarian, image-obsessed company culture (recalling that High School Musical's Vanessa Hudgens was put on lockdown in the Disney offices after her nude photos were leaked), and how the band became stifled under Disney's tutelage, forced to maintain an increasingly awkward and false teen marketability as they grew eager to sing about more complex topics than crushes and homework. Joe and Kevin were required to shave every day, and allusions to anything sexier than a kiss or darker than a minor bummer were "sugar-coated." The essay is emotional, but not scornful, simply trying to make people understand the many factors that led up to 2013, when The Jonas Brothers cancelled their tour, scrapped their fifth album, and stopped being a band.   

Joe doesn't walk back anything he wrote. But with the anxiety he faced back then as a newly unemployed solo act now largely evaporated, he speaks to the same topics with adult, big picture complexity. "We were having to censor ourselves, I think any artist could relate. That's not fun. We were at a standstill with our TV show and the movies. We were young adults, having to pretend like we're young teenagers," he reiterates, but explains that to be frustrated with the company was "such a weird mindset to get into, because we have Disney to thank for so much, they got us started in our career."

Nick bristles at the cartoonish idea that he and his brothers were victims of Big Bad Disney, or anything besides mutual investors in their image and success. "Before this becomes an indictment of Disney and Disney culture, I think it's important to say that, though we felt limited at times, bottom line, Disney was really good for us; really good training wheels for anybody that wants to become a musician or entertainer, as far as work ethic and all the rest. There was a balance to it all, and we could have had it a lot worse." They seem acutely aware there was no cost to their relationship with Disney more valuable than what they gained: "[Those years] are a major part of our story and a big way that our fans connect with us and continue to today." If it were the case that the world couldn't move on from their childhood, Nick says, "It might be tougher to accept... But we have to continue to make new statements and push ourselves to create who we are, every day."

"We were young adults, having to pretend like we're young teenagers." — Joe Jonas

Why would they be inclined to dwell on the past? Since their break-up — when Nick was 21, Joe was 24 and Kevin was 26 — each Jonas has transitioned into an entirely new life. Following his Married To Jonasreality TV show, Kevin retreated into his family and pursued real estate development, satisfied to spend his days as a non-famous. Joe and Nick each rebelled, a little. Joe, "the bad boy," experimented with the archetype he'd been cast in as a teen by dating famous models and growing a beard. Seeming to find the role ill-fitting, he then opted to become the frontman of fun dance-pop band DNCE, of "Cake By The Ocean" fame. Baby Nick tripled in girth, made a vulnerable, sexy R&B record, landed a few underwear billboards, and emerged as a Hollywood heartthrob following his effective performance in blockbuster Jumanji. As you might have heard, the latter two have also recently gotten married, attaching themselves to famous and successful women who, aside from appearing to make them genuinely very happy, also brought them back into the fold of A-list celebrity even before the reunion was announced.

Instead of reminiscing about the highs and lows of their days sketching Mickey Mouse's ears with a CGI wand or picking at scabbed-over angst at the behest of a pesky writer, The Jonas Brothers would rather talk about all the good things in their lives, now. For instance, how sublime it feels to be The Jonas Brothers, again.

"It's been incredible, being back together after the longest time apart and spending this amount of time together in the studio, not to mention actually announcing this stuff and the response to the music," gushes Kevin. "It's been so overwhelming and so exciting. It means so much to us to be able to do this again as brothers. It's just beyond..." The words "incredible," "exciting," "amazing," "overwhelming," as well as "crazy" and "surreal" are repeated over and over in our conversation, as they describe getting to know each other as brothers and musicians again. "It had been four or five years since we spent any time by ourselves, you know, just hanging out."

Today, The Jonas Brothers are poised to become a bigger force in music than they ever were in their Disney days. They've achieved this — despite re-entering a radically different pop landscape than the one they departed, now ruled by rappers making country, bearded scumbros making rap, and teen girls making ASMR — by doing exactly what first made them a sensation: clean, universal, good vibes pop songs.

"We take what we do seriously, but we don't take ourselves seriously." — Nick Jonas

Both of their new singles, "Cool" and "Sucker," radiate an unforced joy and playful confidence that seems to be the defining quality of The Jonas Brothers' second coming. "It's all about having fun," says Nick. "We take what we do seriously, but we don't take ourselves seriously."

The sound of The Jonas Brothers not taking themselves seriously is so pleasant that "Sucker" — a carbonated love song that sounds the way Pop Rocks fizzling on your tongue feel — has become their first ever No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100. It doesn't sound like old Jonas Brothers, but it also doesn't sound like much else in pop right now. With the help of OneRepublic frontman, songwriter and producer Ryan Tedder (as well as popcraft overlords Max Martin, Greg Kurstin and Justin Tranter), The Jonas Brothers have shed their pop-punk-curious crunch and Disney sing-along sugar, while staying faithful to the drums-and-guitar roots and tactile storytelling that made a generation fall in love with them. The effect is a flavor of blissed out pure pop, that both sounds both refreshing next to today's deluge of morbid pop cyborgs and comfortingly familiar.

"We had a real sense that it was important for us to stay authentic to who we are," Nick explains when I ask how they resisted the urge to abandon their rockist roots for pop's current greener, genre-scrambled pastures. "When you go back and and listen to Jonas Brothers records, they're written and produced as rock and roll records." However, he says "that doesn't mean that we can't try out other sounds, or go on a journey to get there," and promises there's at least one trap beat and one yeehaw moment on Happiness Begins.

Despite the above, let's be honest: a No. 1 Jonas Brothers single in 2019 doesn't make complete sense (a glitch in the simulation, as they say). The Jonas Brothers belong in the past: in the childhoods of a generation now in their mid-twenties, and in a normcore, suburban fantasy that feels like it should have lost its appeal in our increasingly conscious times.

Plus, boy bands don't often get number ones. The last time one accomplished the feat was in 2003, when B2K's P. Diddy-assisted "Bump, Bump, Bump" hit number one (overtaking Christina Aguilera's "Beautiful" and Justin Timberlake's "Cry Me A River), according to Billboard. Even unfathomably famous ones: One Direction's highest entry on the Hot 100, 2013's "Best Song Ever," peaked at No. 2, lagging behind "Blurred Lines." Their own hits, 2008's "Burnin' Up," "Tonight" and "A Little Bit Longer," never made it past No. 5 during the reign of Katy Perry's "I Kissed A Girl" and Rihanna's "Disturbia." Their new trophy signals the JoBros have begun to transcend the silos of a traditional boy band audience, and thus, our general disdain for the culture young women tend to love.

So how did they do it?

There's a strong cinematic mythos to The Jonas Brothers' reunion story, which, indeed, will be soon available to stream. It went like this: Nick, the architect of the reunion, had started occasionally slipping JoBros songs into his solo sets and realized he was craving their brotherly magic. As they began spending time together on the set of their documentary, the seed in Nick's brain broke ground, and became an explicit conversation. Then, there was the spontaneous jam session of "Love Bug" in Cuba that reminded them of the magic of playing together. Then came the "intervention," when Kevin and Nick flew to Australia where Joe was hosting The Voice to address the baggage left over from their last run as a band, which they'd realized would be a prerequisite for a successful reunion. They did so with a series of conversations that Kevin describes as "the kind probably only brothers can have without wanting to throw a table at each other" ("they're in the doc, and they're heavy," he promises). During these talks, they decided that this time around, it would be all about having fun. Kevin adds: "The choice to do this wasn't out of need, it was more, 'This is something we really want to do together.'"

The Jonas Brothers' break-up went like this: the flame was Nick's solo ambitions. The gasoline was burn-out, the colliding egos of a band with two frontmen, diverging tastes (evident in the forked road of DNCE and Nick Jonas), and general paralysis. "We lost touch with what we wanted to say, because we were trying so hard to say something different from what we said in the past, musically and creatively," Nick explains. Plus, instead of becoming deluded by their preternatural fame, it had given them imposter syndrome and anxiety. "We understood that our level of success and fame had reached a point, where our musicianship and writing and performing abilities needed time to grow and catch up to it."

When I ask what kept them humble enough to realize this, Nick admits: "I think it was a combination of humility, and just being scared that it was all going to disappear." He references what he recalls as a Coldplay soundbite, that helped them through that choice: "I don't want to misquote, so you might want to fact check, but something about the fact that, they had become too big, you know, for their level of musicianship, so they worked harder than ever and went even deeper creatively. We really related to that." I'm unable to confirm the words belong to any member of Coldplay, but wherever The Jonas Brothers came across it, it must have been a comfort to know they were navigating charted rockstar waters.

Listening to the brothers reflect, it seems that the pyre underneath The Jonas Brothers' flame-out was simply the reality that Nick, Joe and Kevin are genuinely skilled, creative musicians, who were always going to clash with their cramped confines. Maybe the demises of commercial boy bands aren't a product of personal dysfunction at all, but rather, of their artistic health — evidence that they're composed of living, breathing human beings, rather than attractive androids positioned in the right spots on a music video set. If a group of kids in The Jonas Brothers' position forge ahead cheerfully into the complex chaos of their twenties without craving autonomy from each other or Disney's iron fist, someone should probably check under their curls for lobotomy scars.

"I think it was a combination of humility, and just being scared that it was all going to disappear." — Nick Jonas

"It really took the last six, seven years to figure out who we were as people and what kind of music we wanted to make." Nick says. He mentions tactfully that "a lot of young performers find this transition into adulthood really challenging," and implies pushing the bounds of their wholesome, juvenile aesthetic while still operating as The Jonas Brothers might not have been pretty: "If we had continued to try to push things forward the way we were operating, it might have been difficult. Perhaps we would have had to make bolder statements... shocked people into understanding who we are. I think the world is more accepting of us as adults than they would have been if we insisted, 'This is who we are now, accept us.'"

If they hadn't abandoned their spot at the top, and taken the time to grow up and chill out, avoiding many of the more excruciating personal and professional pitfalls of young pop stardom, The Jonas Brothers might have found themselves somewhat tragic figures in 2019, doomed to a career mired in nostalgia. Instead Nick, Kevin and Joe are having the time of their lives on their prodigal pop homecoming. I doubt they'd have this moment if they'd staged their return, however, by attempting to make the world see them as more than "just a boy band." With no ambitions beyond "trying to bottle happiness" and bringing "positive vibes to the world," as Nick explains of the album title inspiration, The Jonas Brothers, against the odds, have plucked themselves out of our "Week in 2009" column and earned a place in the living, breathing cultural fabric of 2019.

Maybe the key is simply prioritizing what's always been at the core of The Jonas Brothers: the fans — their palates and desires, giving them new lyrics to tattoo on their ankles, Easter eggs to mine for the details of their lives, and concerts to scream at with their friends.

"The reunion... felt like getting my best friend back after a long time," one fan, whose handle is @jonasbr0, says on Twitter. Another, whose display handle reads "Kat LOVES the Jonas Brothers," claims "I'm the most excited that anyone has ever been about anything," revealing "When I graduated high school I decorated my cap to say "I'd rather be at a Jonas Brothers concert." "Their music has brought some of my best friends into my life. We've all grown up together with the boys" says @taylaxo, whose pinned Tweet is a photo of herself in a sweatshirt printed with a Tweet from Joe announcing the reunion.

Nick muses, "The best part of this go around, is the fact that those fans have lived with our records for so many years that they're part of their lives, and they're really meaningful to them. We can feel that energy. All those years of fearing it was going to disappear are now kind of..." he trails off. 

Source: PAPER Magazine

[wednesday-editorials]

Destiny 2: Faction Rallies, Forsaken and Disasters in 3, Oh My...

Saturday, June 9th 2018

Written by: A Curious Wednesday

When it comes to Destiny 2, growing pains have become expected.  In a game with more potential than a designated hitter can swing at, this is ultimately very frustrating.  With the arrival of Season 3 of D2 and the announcement of Forsaken, the trend of uneasiness continues.  In a previous post, I talked about my concerns for Warmind, something that any narrative driven player can relate to.

To briefly recap:  the story aspects of Warmind are abysmal at best.  You get 5 story missions that introduce you to a new NPC and two new villains.  We (wrongfully) assumed that the new host of characters would be properly developed.  Ana Bray, for instance, is a legendary guardian who’d been MIA since Crota and Luna, I believe.  During that pitched battle, she fired her golden gun with such focused power and will that the light from it lingers still.  That battle was supposed to have happened centuries ago. She also has connections to Clovis Bray and is, perhaps, the premiere Gunslinger.  Even better than Cayde-6, whom like her, is an original Risen. Now, this is never really conveyed in those 5 missions. None of her legendary feats are ever really mentioned.  She’s essentially relegated to a throw-away NPC and Vendor.

Compiling this problem, Zavala, the leader of the Vanguard and Consensus is not developed any further.  Instead, he continues to be pigeon-holed as “Den Mother” to all guardians. All you need to do to confirm this, is speak with any of Destiny’s fanbase.  Most, if not all, will agree that Zavala is everyone’s overprotective mommy.

When it comes to the two new characters, both are abused and mistreated.  Nokris has soo much story potential.  He is the exiled son of Oryx and the runt of his brood.  He’s the smart one. A necromancer (possibly a male wizard), which is a rarity amongst the Hive/Krill.  He attempted to usurp his father’s power and place as king and failed. His co-conspirator, Xol (a worm god, a being of unimaginable power, eternal life and knowledge) is essentially defeated as a strike boss, which is an insult and disservice to Xol and the grandeur that is supposed to be the “Worm Gods”.  In fact, both are ultimately just strike bosses. Beating either during the campaign is unfulfilling. Being sent to the Deep by Xol is a joke and possibly the greatest offense for me.

So, with things on the narrative side of the spectrum so weak and lacking, you’d hope that Bungie would make the new season’s Faction Rally topnotch.  Personally, I don’t mind the “Renown” mechanic in principle. During the grind to faction rank 50, it adds to the challenge. However, the vehicle for this delivery is problematic.  By skewing each firefight in favor of the AI whenever a player has active “Renown” it has ended up making every open-world activity more difficult than it should be. With the arrival of Escalation Protocol, this oversight becomes glaringly apparent.  Escalation Protocol is a new feature and endgame mode where you join up with other guardians to take on wave after wave of Hive opponents in increasing difficulty. Ideally, 3 level-capped. 385 light-level guardians should be able to complete all waves if they can communicate and work together.

In practice, it’s usually one fireteam that sparks it once they notice 3 or more random guardians patrolling the Hellas Basin.  Since all guardians need to complete Escalation Protocol waves (a least once), any available guardian generally comes running when EP is activated.  Currently, this means that 1 team ends up trying to complete an EP with underpowered guardians, culminating in failure and frustration.  With the arrival of the first Faction Rally this season and the release of “Renown” its made an already challenging open-world event more difficult, by further handicapping the player in favor of the AI-controlled enemy.

The trend of handicapping the player to up the difficulty is nothing new.  Its an established procedure carried over from Destiny.  Any time you enter a darkness zone (iow “Boss fight”), for instance, you are effectively de-buffed, weakened by the overwhelming presence of Darkness and cut-off from the Traveler’s Light. You’re left with your own strength and light to see you and your team through.  Why does this happen?  Perhaps, each of these areas are influenced by the taint of Darkness to such an extent that it manifests physically.  At least, that is how I like to think of it. As it adds a narrative reason for the game mechanic. 

However, by further handicapping the player, it ultimately diminishes the feeling of grandeur and heroicness that you’d normally experienced as a maxed-out, veteran guardian (player).  Destiny did a good job of preserving that feeling of being a walking, talking badass.  You were/are the prophesied guardian. The one Saint-14 looked up to, perhaps even idolized.  You were the one that did what no other guardian could do. And, if you were capable and competent, you did it alone.

Destiny 2 does a great job of stripping you of that feeling, making the overall experience occasionally frustrating and lackluster.  The grind to rank-level 50 is long enough and made worse by the fact that some of us have limited time to invest in D2′s grind.  Now, here’s where the two schools of thought diverge. School 1) everyone should have access to and the ability to get everything, so you must level the playing field; School 2) only the dedicated should get everything since they put in the time, effort and hardwork.  I, myself, fall into the second camp or a variation of it.

I believe the unexpected problem that is “Renown” could be fixed by tying the effect to a faction’s emblem, class item or both and enabling factions to recruit and have relevance all year around, like they were in Destiny.  Thereby, turning Faction Rallies into something special and unique.  Something on par with Crimson Days, Festival of the Lost, Sparrow Racing League and the Winter Solstice event.  Perhaps, each faction, dependent upon their beliefs structure needs to accomplish something significant.   Perhaps, its a month long competition for bragging rights and something else.  Something more.  Something like supremacy or even, just something as simple as which faction gets the lion’s share of funding for the rest of the fiscal quarter. 

In Destiny, factions were always relevant.  As soon as you reached level 20, you were allowed your choice of which faction to pledge to, and you could, after a week, decide to pledge your loyalty to a different faction.  Rank progress was limited and constricted. You had to work to progress through the rank levels in Destiny.  You had to represent your chosen faction on your guardian.  As the benefits of pledging to a faction were only available when you, the player, equipped a faction-specific class item and/or emblem.

Once you did that, it was an uphill slog to those coveted exotic items.  Uphill, but worthwhile. Like many of the more obscure features of Destiny, you were rewarded for the time you put into it.  It wasn’t gifted to you; you earned it. There was no time limit.  Thus negating the feeling of artificial pressure. It didn’t matter how long it took you to get those coveted items as long as you were willing to put in the work to get them.  It took me 2 years or so to get Dead Orbit’s exotic cloak.  I didn’t mind the wait.  I also didn’t stick with Dead Orbit exclusively.  A more dedicated player would have gotten that item and others much faster.

In Destiny 2, this psychological/societal feature is not present.  It’s almost as if the Vanguard took pity on those surviving guardians of the Red War.  As if they became Oprah during her final season of her talk show: “you get an exotic! You get an exotic!”  “You get raid gear!” “You get trial gear!” This analogy can be and has been applied to Hawthorne.  I imagine this is what Hawthorne would shout in her best Oprah impression as she tossed out specially encrypted engrams to the throngs of clamoring guardians with their hands out.

Of course, I know better than to believe that fantasy.  There’s no narrative reason for these decisions. There’s no real narrative pull for participating in the Faction Rallies to begin with.  There is for Strikes, the Crucible and the Iron Banner. Strikes, from a narrative perspective are high-level, precision operations that makes assassins out of you.  In order to protect the remnants of humanity from Darkness. The Crucible, on the other hand, is a way to hone your skills and abilities; to sharpen you. It also serves as a way to resolve grievances.  Nothing like a sanctioned fight to the death, to prove your point.  “Fight me for what you believe!” The Iron Banner honors the fallen Iron Lords thru glorious gladiatorial combat and serves to further hone your abilities and skills. Of course, the Iron Banner is also not what it used to be.  Now that level-advantage is disabled, it's no different from the Crucible. This is too bad, because the added difficulty made participating in previous iterations of the IB savoring. It gave rise to water-cooler moments and bragging rights.

The concept of Faction Rallies overall is neat.  However, in practice there’s nothing special about them.  The weapons you can claim are ultimately reskinned versions of likely superior Vanguard and Crucible weapons.  There is no meaningful choice behind siding with a particular faction. Arach Jalaal of Dead Orbit raves about escaping a defined end and little else.  Lakshmi-2 of Future War Cult raves about the inescapability of war and how we all need to prepare for it. Executor Hideo of New Monarchy is obsessed with protecting and preserving humanity’s cradle, Earth.  Beyond some ambient dialogue you might chance upon by standing before each vendor, there is no way to know what each faction stands for or why you should care. The experience has devolved into a loot-grab for the shiniest prizes.  Oftentimes, this means that New Monarchy wins each faction rally because their armor, vehicles and weapons are the most appealing.

For those of us who know what each faction stands for, this is a deathknell of sorts.  I, myself, am a Dead Orbit loyalist. I could be accused of being a fatalist, but by that notion, so too are the Fallen/Eliksni.  They abandoned their homeworld after the Whirlwind, just like Dead Orbit and Arach Jalaal want to do. That is something I agree with.  In Destiny, it was why all three of my guardians sided with DO.  I’ve always distrusted the Traveler. It brought ultimate war and destruction to our doorstep.  Through the usage of the former grimoires I learned that it did similarly to the Fallen and Cabal.  When those two species/peoples could no longer protect it, the Traveler fled. Abandoned those people to their fates.  Dead Orbit believes the Traveler will do that to us, should the time come. I agree. So, they’ve prepared a fleet of ships and supplies.  They fund scouts to search out our galaxy for a home untouched by the Darkness and Traveler. And while, each faction acts with the best interest of humanity in mind, DO is the only one pragmatic enough to plan long-term and realize the survival of our species.

Future War Cult are, in some ways, battle-crazed zealots.  Fanatics that believe crushing their enemies here, now and in the future is the only guarantee for victory.  I consider that to be short-sighted, but still a noble cause. They don’t wish to abandon earth any more than New Monarchy does, but they are willing to if it means our survival.  They also have ties to the Vex and some misunderstood, wonky machine monikered, “The Device” that allows individuals to glimpse future, alternate timelines.  It’s how they prepare for the wars to come. They prepare, though, which is a key difference. They don’t try to avoid those future conflicts.

New Monarchy, on the other hand is the most obstinate.  They are not interested in entertaining a future where humanity no longer resides on earth or in the Sol system.  They are not interested in a governing council. They are not interested in exploration, but rather, reclamation. Their shtick is reclaiming what was lost.  Reclaim the Earth and Luna. Reclaim the Golden Age. Reclaim Earth’s dominance. Sire tons of children to build up our population numbers. They are interested in the absolute power, authority and rule of one individual.  Executor Hideo is a zealot. A diehard. It’s the only way to become an Executor.

Again, without having prior experience, how many of you would know all of this about each faction?  All you’d readily know is that NM offers armor reminiscent of medieval regalia and bold colors of red, gold, brown and teal-green.  DO offers armor reminiscent to what you’d scavenge in the wild. Something homemade. Its weathered, worn. It’s got miles on it. History.  Their colors are black, white and brown. FWC provides modern, mass-produced armor that strikes a balance between full-plate protection and padding (think “kevlar”).  Theirs is a further balance between the grandiose of New Monarchy and the practicality of Dead Orbit. FWC believes in standing out. Therefore, their colors are white, purple/blue and gold/orange.  This all means that when choosing who to represent, its really a matter of what look you’re going for with your barbie. Maybe, just maybe, one faction has a weapon that is superior to the rest.  And that influences your decision.

I’m all for glamorizing my guardian on occasion or when the mood strikes me, but overall, I’m driven by the narrative.  Wherever I can find it.  It’s why I originally sided with Dead Orbit 4 years ago. It’s why I’m so crestfallen about the state of Destiny 2.  Why I’m so apprehensive about Forsaken.  If you logically think about it, Bungie has likely already finished working on Forsaken.  They’d already finished Warmind by the time they called their “summit”.  Which meant that there was no fixing Warmind, further exacerbating the underlying issues plaguing Destiny 2.  Issues that many have already brought up via Youtube channel hosts.  The likes of My Name is Byf, Mylien Games, Darkside Royalty Lore have all articulated similar points better than I could have.  

Forsaken, undoubtedly, will probably be better than everything prior to it.  The Taken King elevated Destiny to a new level.  It delivered on some of the promises that had until then been cast aside.  Therefore, its an educated leap that the same will be true of Forsaken. Nevertheless, if the underlying narrative problems aren’t rectified, it’ll ultimately be a hollow victory.  Again, take this season’s Faction Rally as an indication. The “Renown” mechanic sounds like a good idea. It could have been a good idea. The Good Idea Fairy would agree. This, is, however, why we don’t acknowledge “good ideas”.  In order for a good idea to be implemented properly, it needs to be tested and tested and measured and reigned in by the physicalities of the circumstances. This is why you only deliver on things you can promise.

By stripping D2 bare in the 11th hour and starting anew, they threw away too much to make way for a different direction.  A disastrous direction that they are now scrambling to retract. All the features that Forsaken is adding back in, should never have been removed in the first place.  To charge for it is narcissistic at best. If you have doubts, look to this month’s Faction Rally and last month’s Iron Banner (the one about that emote.).  Exotic ornaments and catalysts are available dependent upon which faction you choose to pledge to. However, you can only pledge to one. Meaning, if you want them all, you must grind to 50 in each faction ranking system before the Rally event ends.  The decision isn’t based upon a narrative reason. It isn’t based upon which faction best suites you. Its based upon the loot offered. If you’ve got a busy life and can only hop into Destiny late at night or on the weekends, you’re s.o.l. Bungie attempted to fix this by making loot rewards from all activities available to all, regardless if said player contributed or not.  That didn’t work out well. The playerbase decried this practice. So it was rescinded in the form of a compromise: instead of getting high-level engrams from anywhere, you’re now only rewarded high-level engrams from either the Vanguard or Crucible engram pool.

Previous iterations of the Faction Rally had systems similar to this rally’s “Renown”, skewing combat in the the favor of the enemy and penalizing idiotic player practices.  Those proved unsuccessful as well, which is why they were removed. Like the Dodo, “Renown” will likely disappear as well. It will be replaced with some other, newer good idea that will ultimately not pan out as intended and the cycle will continue.  Until Destiny 3, where Bungie gives up on their plans of creating a new sub-genre: MMORPG-based FPS and settles on a Call of Duty clone/knockoff/lesser version.  Except instead of the “good” CoDs, it’ll be Black Ops IV with no narrative or campaign, entirely multiplayer and group-content driven.  Does anyone remember Shadownrun?  How can I predict this? Bad things happen in 3s. We’ll experience some other, new Faction Rally system and gimmick before Bungie gives up on that and attempts to circle back to D1 standards for factions, by which point it may be too late.

[verdigrisprowl]

May 7 Dancitron Movie Night - Alien 3

Prowl and Soundwave are Completely Frigging Exhausted.

On the bright side, Prowl figured out that he can send his alternate visual feeds of the movie so she can watch too.

Today ItsyBitsySpyers 7:46 pm *Soundwave's tired as Pit from barely recharging - when he's brave enough to try - but he's here and attempting to be alert. He has plans for another of his favorite pieces of content and by Pri... by Solus, he will watch it.* ItsyBitsySpyers 7:47 pm *So he's in his seat, slouched down more than usual, but trying to stay upright nonetheless.* VProwl 7:49 pm *on the other hand, Prowl shows up, sits down, leans on Soundwave, and immediately falls asleep.* ItsyBitsySpyers 7:51 pm *Soundwave leans into Prowl right away. It's so nice to not have to rely on his own strength to stay upright... ish.*

*One feeler slips out to form a protective loop over Prowl's lap, up the back of the couch, behind his shoulders, and back down. To Pit with what anyone else sees. It's kind of hard to care when you keep having nightmares about dark energon infesting your loved ones.* Specs 7:52 pm *In comes a slightly-frazzled looking dragon! For Ravage, she's got energon fish with tinsel skeletons. For everyone else, it's the usual assortment of mercury cakes, rust sticks, and other delightful draconic goodies. For Soundwave, she has a carefully-made gummi version of the dancing chestburster from last weeks movie. And, since this is SPECIFICALLY for Soundwave, she's approaching him with it before putting everyone else's goodies on the table.* Um... ItsyBitsySpyers 7:53 pm *Ravage is strolling down the stairs and sniffing before she even gets to Soundwave. He smells tinsel. Don't mind him licking his chops.*

*Soundwave lifts his helm to look at the dragon, and then at the chestburster gummi.*

[[...Is that...]] Specs 7:54 pm It's the one from last week's movie. I, uh, I didn't quite get the hat right, but it should still taste good... *hopeful dragon grin* If you'd like it, of course... Magnum Ace 7:55 pm -pings Soundwave for entry- ItsyBitsySpyers 7:57 pm *He keeps staring at it, unable to process its existence all the way. It's so - it's so ridiculous. He can't believe the dragon actually reproduced that damned thing with energon.*

[[He won't be able to eat it, but it is...]] *Finally huffs, if quietly. Mustn't disturb Prowl.* [[It's amusing. He will keep it. Thank you.]] *Ace gets a bridge, albeit a little slower than usual. Calculating bridges is hard when you're sleepy.*

*He also gets a warning.*

@M: [[Frightening content tonight.]] *Well. Frightening for anyone who isn't him, anyway.* Magnum Ace 7:59 pm -Don't worry. Hopefully him and Bull are too tired to register much- Specs 7:59 pm *the dragon made seven iterations of the damned thing. she was determined to give this to Soundwave. sometimes, it's not talent, just spiteful determination.* You're very welcome, Soundwave. *with a happy churr, the dragon heads over to the rest of the snacks, stopping at the bar to give Ravage his tinsel fish* VProwl 7:59 pm ((sw voice: [[Well, mark him down as scared AND horny.]])) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:59 pm ((LMAO)) Specs 8:00 pm ((bless u prowl)) Magnum Ace 8:00 pm -But he's going to ping back that he got the warning, and trot through the bridge- Bull 8:01 pm *Bull comes in after Magnum looking tired and still has a patch to cover up the fresh repair to his left side* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:01 pm *Ravage is practically getting high just off the THOUGHT of tinsel at this point. He actually goes so far as to bunt the dragon before pulling the fish under the bar with himself.*

*Soundwave just tiredly toys with the gummi, wiggling the tail. He nods at Ace and Bull. Noting the patch, of course.* [[Hurt?]] ItsyBitsySpyers 8:03 pm ((TEN MINUTES grab ur snacks and stuff)) Specs 8:04 pm *a ravage bunt! she is... blessed... the dragon chirrups delightedly, getting to placing the snacks in their rightful place with vigor* Bull 8:04 pm Yeah, had a rough game today. *Bull was just happy for the pain blockers in the patch* Magnum Ace 8:04 pm -is standing below the table and just looking up. Kinda hard to climb when his leg is still healing- Some teams still like to rough their opponents up ItsyBitsySpyers 8:05 pm *Oh. Oh, he should... hold on.*

*Soundwave stretches the other feeler out to the opposite side of the room and pulls it back with a small stair set in tow.* *Plop. There you go, both of you.* VProwl 8:06 pm ((when is somebody going to address ravage's terrible addiction)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:06 pm ((whenever someone actually realizes that bird's food hoarding is unhealthy and addresses that)) Magnum Ace 8:07 pm Thanks. -that makes this easier. Now they can climb stairs instead of table legs- Specs 8:07 pm ((in all fairness to the dragon, food hoarding is PERFECTLY NORMAl in her culture, which is why it's such a big thing to give other people food- of course Bird hoards food, everyone hoards food)) Bull 8:07 pm Thank you. *makes sure to stay close to Magnum incase he needs a hand. Specs 8:07 pm ((she has no excuse for dealing tinsel to ravage, tho)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:07 pm [[Gave them a rough time right back, he hopes.]] Magnum Ace 8:10 pm -Bull, he's stubborn. He'll be fiiiiine- You mean us? We don't do that. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:11 pm [[What do you do?]] Magnum Ace 8:11 pm Dodge ItsyBitsySpyers 8:11 pm *He can't imagine telling the owners that they're being attacked helps, since the humans seem to think them replaceable objects.* [[...That is all?]] Bull 8:11 pm And play the game as it's meant be played. Specs 8:11 pm Why not? Eat those who would harm you. *the dragon hops onto the back of a couch, and gets into a comfy loaf* Magnum Ace 8:12 pm I....don't think that would work Specs 8:12 pm Well, you don't have to ACTUALLY eat them. The point of the phrase is that you shouldn't just let people beat you up. Omicron 8:13 pm *big predacon comes in, walks outside after the bridge and carefully, shakes herself out there of clinging ice crystals and once sure she got ride of most of it, comes in and sits. oo, she's foggy, nice* Magnum Ace 8:13 pm We won the last championship without attacking the other teams ItsyBitsySpyers 8:15 pm [[The point is to stop them from attacking you at all, championship or not... but as you like.]] *As long as they aren't murdered.*

*Soundwave tilts his helm at the steam rising off Ice Queen. How dramatic looking.* [[Greetings.]] Magnum Ace 8:16 pm -So, best not to bring up more of what can happen on the field. Got it- Swoop 8:16 pm *teeeeeeeeeeeenntitively pings soundwave* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:17 pm ((WARNINGS: I already packed the DVDs so I couldn't prewatch this and am going based on memory. I might miss some things here. Outdated incorrect beliefs about extra chromosomes, violence, blood and gore, deeply unpleasant death, animal death, mentions of and attempted rape, prisoner abuse, mentions of drug use, probably some flashing lights or flickering somewhere. Tonight is not an easy watch.)) Bull 8:17 pm *Keeps silent since he's sure they wouldn't understand their reasons* Magnum Ace 8:17 pm They 're slowly realizing that their way isn't working...we can take a few injuries VProwl 8:17 pm ((sounds like a barrel of laughs)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:18 pm *Soundwave pings Swoop. Solus have mercy on his head, he is not alert enough for a rampaging Dinobot. Please let him behave...*

@S: [[Greetings.]] Omicron 8:18 pm *biiig fanged, happy grin from Icy back at soundwave, she's so cold that the air is making fog more then steam but hey, it works, happy predacon* Hello Swoop 8:18 pm *is unusually hesistant over the comm with Soundwave* Bird watching movie? ItsyBitsySpyers 8:18 pm @S: [[She is not down here. He can call her if you intend to come and behave.]] Swoop 8:19 pm Kay... Bull 8:19 pm ((Boy this movie brings back memories. It was the one Alien movie my dad didn't want me watching... even though I had seen far worse as a kid)) Magnum Ace 8:20 pm -carefully sits on table, wincing slightly- Considering the game we have tomorrow, I'm glad they didn't aim at my shoulders ItsyBitsySpyers 8:20 pm [[What is tomorrow?]] Magnum Ace 8:20 pm Baseball game Swoop 8:20 pm ((I don't love how much of this movie's plot comes from contractual decisions but tired, don't give a fuck Ripley is wonderful.)) Magnum Ace 8:21 pm Today was soccer ItsyBitsySpyers 8:21 pm [[No arms in soccer?]] Swoop 8:21 pm *wanders into dancitron in pterosaur form, low to the ground, head twitching around as he looks for Laserbeak* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:21 pm *Laserbeak is on her way down. She's as tired as the Boss, but if she can perch-sit with Swoop, she will.* Magnum Ace 8:22 pm Right, only goalies can use their arms and hands when it comes to the ball Everyone else cannot Swoop 8:22 pm *makes a beeline for her* Bird. Bull 8:22 pm *Bull raises his hand* I'm our goalie for soccer. Prowl 8:23 pm *arrives immediately after Swoop* Omicron 8:23 pm *icy waves a wing* VProwl 8:23 pm *Doesn't even stir as the movie starts. He's still sound asleep.* Swoop 8:24 pm *doesn't know what to do with himself* Magnum Ace 8:25 pm . . . ItsyBitsySpyers 8:26 pm *Bird pats him gently with a feeler.* {{Swoop.}}

[[Then your arms are more important?]]

*Glance at Prowl. Hmm.... slight nudge.* Swoop 8:26 pm *leans into the feelers and closes his optics* VProwl 8:27 pm *doesn't stir.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:27 pm *Sleep it is. He'll just curl the feeler a little tighter and resume watching.* Magnum Ace 8:27 pm In soccer he's the one that keeps the other team from scoring points if the rest of us fail ItsyBitsySpyers 8:28 pm *Nod.* Bull 8:28 pm Need every part of my body for that. Just hoping my side will be good enough to still bat tomorrow. Specs 8:29 pm ((sorry, cat tried to turn off the computer)) Omicron 8:29 pm *chrips* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:29 pm ((np)) Magnum Ace 8:29 pm -pats- You'll be fine, don't worry VProwl 8:29 pm ((is the stream going in and out or is it just me?)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:30 pm ((audio wise?)) Swoop 8:30 pm Bird Miss you VProwl 8:30 pm ((whole stream)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:30 pm ((no problems here)) Swoop 8:30 pm ((doing okay for me)) VProwl 8:30 pm ((video is stuttering)) ((boo)) Magnum Ace 8:30 pm ((all good here ItsyBitsySpyers 8:32 pm {{Bird miss Swoop too. Away long, long, yes.}} ((close browser and restart?)) Swoop 8:32 pm *perks up a little, bird missed him!* Omicron 8:33 pm [I had my laptop muted *turns on and listens*] Swoop 8:33 pm *but then his brain catches up with him* yah... Bob dead Omicron 8:33 pm (seems fine here)) Specs 8:33 pm ((audio's fine here, for the computer having been nearly restarted by a horrible goblin who I love and cherish)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:34 pm {{Bird remembers. Very sad, so sad. Poor, poor Bob bug.}} Swoop 8:34 pm *shrugs uncomfortably* Omicron 8:34 pm ((*releasing the noodles here*)) VProwl 8:35 pm ((why doesn't she just tell them)) Prowl 8:35 pm ((newt ;v; Omicron 8:35 pm ((scared to?)) Swoop 8:35 pm ((doesn't want xenomorphs on the books?)) Magnum Ace 8:36 pm ...... VProwl 8:36 pm ((also you might want to WARN this guy that a tiny alien might be inside of the corpse waiting to pop out)) Magnum Ace 8:36 pm -doesn't like where this is going- Prowl 8:37 pm ((well it should be dead at this point yeah? Swoop 8:37 pm *shifts his weight from forelimb to forelimb* Specs 8:39 pm ((mr. clemens has one of Those Voices that I have to lip-read to understand. im die.)) Omicron 8:39 pm (*patpats*) VProwl 8:40 pm *suddenly starts upright with a shout.* Specs 8:40 pm ((it's fine lol. I just get to squint at his face a lil more)) Swoop 8:40 pm *HOPS and turns reflexively at shouting* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:40 pm ((i'm sorry, this movie has a real problem with too soft/too loud audio, i never watch it without subs))

*Soundwave jerks upright and reflexively squeezes the coil, but quickly loosens it again* VProwl 8:40 pm *where the hell— what— who— where— what— how—* Magnum Ace 8:40 pm -shifts around a bit more uncomfortably at the sight of the furnace- Prowl 8:41 pm *startles* Swoop 8:41 pm ((okay NOW I'm getting jumpy video)) Omicron 8:41 pm *gives a chirp to the smaller mecha* Bull 8:42 pm *is just not watching at this point* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:42 pm *Bird just keeps petting Swoop. Nobody needs him to start breathing fire in a startle or something.*

*Soundwave pings Prowl.*

@P: [[Calm, calm. Prowl: safe. Prowl, here.]] Magnum Ace 8:43 pm -ducks head- Omicron 8:43 pm *fans her wings* VProwl 8:43 pm ((hell of a flower)) Omicron 8:43 pm *Icy's warming up, if someone needs to hide under wings they can* Swoop 8:43 pm *is a big fan of Bird pets and easily distracted to boot* Specs 8:44 pm *she's got a fur coat, she can take advantage of the Safe Wings anytime she wants. which is about now.* Swoop 8:44 pm *wanders somewhat aimlessly looking for where to camp himself, giving a wide berth to places he usually goes* VProwl 8:44 pm *grabs Soundwave's arm as he looks around, trying to orient himself. Right. Right. Movie night.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:44 pm *Picks the upstairs remote out of his subspace and stretches it over to the baseball players. Just in case.* Omicron 8:44 pm *Icy carefully lays her wings in a loose flop, she does chirp to the dinobot from the back* Prowl 8:45 pm *sits back down slowly* Swoop 8:45 pm *chirps back reflexively* VProwl 8:45 pm *looks around the room.* ... Sorry. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:45 pm *Soundwave rests his other hand atop Prowl's to try to provide comfort, not minding the grab. If it's necessary, it's necessary.* Magnum Ace 8:45 pm -give them another scare like that last one, and they just might- Prowl 8:45 pm It's fine. Swoop 8:47 pm *wanders into an unfamiliar corner and climbs on top of a table to perch* Magnum Ace 8:48 pm -hope it's not the table him and Bull are on- ItsyBitsySpyers 8:48 pm {{What you going here for, eh?}}

*Spins a hovery circle around Swoop, curious. Is it easier to see from here?* Swoop 8:48 pm For sit Omicron 8:49 pm *if he's near, Ice Queen stretches out her neck to sniff at* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:49 pm {{Why sitting so far?}} Swoop 8:49 pm *hope you like the smell of dust and caves and burnt metal* Dunno VProwl 8:49 pm *lets go of Soundwave and slouches back down.* Omicron 8:50 pm *she's smelled worse, and there's not a lot thats truely 'bad' to her* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:51 pm @P: [[Resuming recharge?]] Omicron 8:52 pm *checks on fluffy dragon?* Specs 8:52 pm *fluffy dragon is the fluffiest loaf. it's safe here.* Magnum Ace 8:52 pm ........... Omicron 8:52 pm *gives them a lick then* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:53 pm {{Kay. Want snack?}} VProwl 8:53 pm @S «No, I'm up now.» ItsyBitsySpyers 8:53 pm @SProwl: [[Are you all right, there?]] Swoop 8:53 pm Huh? Oh. Nah. *pauses* Bird want snack? Omicron 8:54 pm I dislike that warden ItsyBitsySpyers 8:54 pm {{No, no. Bird fine.}} She was in the middle of pigging out when Soundwave called her down.* {{You change mind, you letting Bird know, kaaaaay?}} Specs 8:54 pm *licks Icy's snout right back. she's okay! just a little nervous after seeing something more her size get chestburst.* Swoop 8:54 pm Kay : > Prowl 8:54 pm @S: Hm? *she didn't expect to be asked after* Yes, yes, I just wasn't expecting anyone in the room to shout. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:55 pm *Soundwave nods to the Prowl at his side and lets his hand drop. Seems to be all right now.*

@P: [[Can he do anything to be of service?]]

*Confirmation ping to the other Prowl. All right. He wasn't sure.* Prowl 8:57 pm *a ping of concern to her alternate* Omicron 8:57 pm yeah, I don't like this warden ItsyBitsySpyers 8:57 pm [[Neither does he.]] *May he get himself infested and serve as a host to a better life form.* Swoop 8:57 pm *has no idea what's happening and doesn't particularly care to try to catch up* VProwl 8:57 pm @P «... Yes?» @S «No, I'm fine. Sorry for being disruptive.» Swoop 8:58 pm *instead he rocks a little on the table so it ends up going off balance and then falling back in place, not a wild rollercoaster but still a little bit of a balancing act for a dinoborb* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:58 pm @P: [[No apology needed.]] ((it's going to be very rough in a moment iirc so people might want to be afk as needed)) Prowl 8:58 pm @P: Your status? Omicron 8:59 pm I've dealt with that kind, type when younger. *rumbles, and folds up one wing, helping to keep specs braced under and let them peek out better, other wing is streached out.....and then low growling* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:59 pm ((and clear)) *Bird whistles in surprise at the sudden movement and grabs the table with feeler claws. Don't fall...* Magnum Ace 9:01 pm ohno Swoop 9:01 pm *isn't the best at a lot of things but being in the air is his jam, this is easy peasy* VProwl 9:01 pm @P «Normal. Sorry for disturbing you, I'd been dozing.» Magnum Ace 9:01 pm -hides face- ItsyBitsySpyers 9:03 pm *Ahh. Even if the rest of his life is a sleep-deprived shambles, he can still have this moment to appreciate a delightful alien.* Omicron 9:03 pm well *closes wing on specs* VProwl 9:03 pm ... Oh, it's one of these movies. Omicron 9:03 pm *she still has another free wing to hide under if anyone needs* Specs 9:03 pm *thanks* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:03 pm [[It is.]] Swoop 9:03 pm *gets bored with his self-imposed earthquake and flops down over the table, wings ending up on either side* VProwl 9:04 pm *SLJDFKLJ NEEDLES IN HEAD* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:04 pm ((lmfao and here i thought this movie was safe for prowl as far as needles in head go)) VProwl 9:04 pm *HWY THIS* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:04 pm ((*just gives up and facepalms*)) @P: [[...He apologizes. He did not know.]]

*Well, if Prowl wasn't going to sleep before, he definitely isn't now.* Swoop 9:05 pm *is now a tablecloth* VProwl 9:05 pm *not going to watch the screen.* @S «Yep.» Prowl 9:05 pm @P: No apology needed. Specs 9:06 pm *blinks* It was me? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:06 pm *Bird decides to see if she can get Swoop to stay still by going to grab treats to put them on his tablecloth wings.* [[What was you?]] Omicron 9:07 pm ?? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:07 pm [[Oh. He sees.]] VProwl 9:07 pm *looks tentatively at the screen.* Swoop 9:08 pm *makes a sad little noise when Bird zips off but is quite content to watch her set up a tea party on his wings* Omicron 9:08 pm can someone smack that warden? *loosens wing for fluffy dragon?* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:08 pm [[Perhaps the alien will.]] Specs 9:08 pm *peeks out, to see if there's Actually A Dragon* Omicron 9:09 pm good Prowl 9:09 pm *scowls* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:11 pm *Blips.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:13 pm *There. Bird has arranged a full smorgasbord on Swoop's wings.*

*...Maybe she'll take a FEW things. But the rest is just gonna sit there.* Swoop 9:14 pm *looks at what she arranged sideways and gives the littlest of snickers* Omicron 9:14 pm that's a big needle....*clamps wing again* Swoop 9:15 pm Now Swoop table Specs 9:15 pm *nope nope nope nope nope nope nope* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:15 pm *One of the first times he's seen one with a changed shape based on the host. How fascinating.*

*...But, hmm.* {{Swoop not Dinobot. Now, Swoop Tablebot.}} Swoop 9:16 pm Keehee That BORING altmode, Bird Prowl 9:16 pm Did it get him? Omicron 9:16 pm ....HAH VProwl 9:16 pm It got him. Prowl 9:17 pm ...Good. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:17 pm [[...He's tired. He thought he heard you say]] [][][]Good.[][][] Swoop 9:18 pm ((that expression of hers)) ((goddamn)) ((so far passed unimpressed)) Specs 9:19 pm ((I'd let her punch me)) VProwl 9:19 pm *... hmmm. pings his alternate; offers a video feed from his optics.* Prowl 9:19 pm You heard correct. *oh! accepts* VProwl 9:20 pm *it's got Prowl's HUD measurements and calculations riddling the feed, sorry about that.* Omicron 9:21 pm -oh yeah loosens wing again- Prowl 9:22 pm *it's almost familiar the calculations and everything* Swoop 9:22 pm *for once isn't wiggling enough to send goodies everywhere* Prowl 9:22 pm @P: Many of these Earth documentaries have audio description but these Alien ones do not. Thank you. Swoop 9:22 pm *most of his twitching remains from the neck up for now* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:23 pm *Soundwave's hands twitch.* VProwl 9:24 pm @P «You're welcome.» *glad his alternate can process visual data.* «Let me know any other time you want a feed.» Omicron 9:24 pm hmmm Prowl 9:25 pm @P: I will. Magnum Ace 9:25 pm -NOPE!- VProwl 9:25 pm *he's just gotta hold very still for the rest of the movie. no problem.* Omicron 9:25 pm *twitches slightly and tilts head before giving out a poof of cold-cloud like a smoke ring.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:27 pm *Can sense the cold from here. He twitches again. No cold, thank you.*

*And then a third time.* Omicron 9:27 pm *its not much, just a poof, she won't make ice inside* Prowl 9:27 pm @S: You heard me correctly earlier. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:28 pm @SProwl: [[You cheered a warden's death?]] Magnum Ace 9:30 pm -whelp, if Bull doesn't mind he's taking the remote and going upstairs, possibly pulling Bull with him- ItsyBitsySpyers 9:30 pm [[...He thought so.]]

*Slump.* Bull 9:30 pm ((I'm gonna head off. Got headache and too tired; so night all)) VProwl 9:30 pm ((gnight)) Magnum Ace 9:30 pm ((g'night! ItsyBitsySpyers 9:30 pm ((night <3 rest up, hope your head gets better)) Omicron 9:30 pm (rest well!) Prowl 9:31 pm @S: He was clearly a terrible warden. The conditions of this prison are abysmal. If he had listened to Ripley when she tried to warn him the first time, he wouldn't have died. Swoop 9:31 pm Bird ItsyBitsySpyers 9:31 pm {{What what?}} Swoop 9:32 pm Tell a story Omicron 9:32 pm hmmm Swoop 9:32 pm please? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:32 pm @SProwl: [[...That is fair.]] *Bird flops on Swoop and folds her wings up.*

{{Bird tiiiiiiired. Not want story telling.}} Swoop 9:33 pm *lays his head down so his beak is hanging off the table too* Kay *is now a combination snack tray and bed and is totally fine with it* VProwl 9:35 pm *he rests an arm on Soundwave's feeler.* Omicron 9:36 pm (has anyone seen the isolation game based on these earlier movies?) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:36 pm *The whole thing slithers a bit more to allow for the part under the arm to scooch into a loop and cling to it.* ((i have it but have yet to play it)) Omicron 9:36 pm [I was playing some of it] VProwl 9:39 pm ((how convenient, to need to die, and be in a base full of murderers)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:39 pm ((i hope it's as good as it looks)) Windchill 9:40 pm (( I hear it's good once you get into it. Haven't played though. )) Swoop 9:42 pm *chirps and murmers to himself, it's not really a song, it's just a way of not being totally still* Windchill 9:42 pm *Windchill is here. He has two heads tonight; one stacked on top of the other. The top one is Blue, riding around like a jetpack baby.* Swoop 9:43 pm *is a tablecloth covered in goodies and a borb friend* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:43 pm *Bird whistles tiredly to Blue and goes back to being quiet, listening to Swoop carry on with his sorta-song.* Windchill 9:43 pm *Swoop...has become a tablecloth?* Omicron 9:43 pm *big dragon predacon with fuzzy dragon under a wing over here* Swoop 9:43 pm ((ngl that is actually one of my favorite movie "rallying the troops" speeches)) Specs 9:44 pm *fuzzy dragon is fuzzy* Windchill 9:44 pm *Blue cheeps, it's almost polite....* Swoop 9:44 pm *is draped right over that table, wings and beak over the edge* Omicron 9:44 pm *fuzzy dragon gets another lick* *chirps at Blue, hello young wiggly one* Specs 9:45 pm *Icy gets another lick onna snout* Windchill 9:46 pm *Windchill gives Swoop a once over...and decides it's better to not have noticed. He's gonna take his squeaky spawn and make for a seat.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:47 pm *Clutches the arm tighter.* Windchill 9:47 pm *But he's interrupted when Blue spots Food and cheeps her demands.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:48 pm *The ship is coming...* Swoop 9:48 pm *isn't looking to socialize beyond Bird and is quite content with his spot* VProwl 9:48 pm *... pats feeler with his other hand. is he stressed for the humans or for the xenomorph? ... or excited for the xenomorph?* Windchill 9:48 pm (( Well, that's didn't age well but I'mma ignore it. )) Swoop 9:49 pm ((yeah this was during that "we tried real hard" period of cgi)) Windchill 9:49 pm (( Yeeeep. )) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:49 pm ((yeah they had some problems with the Runner, and this was apparently better than the puppet)) *Oh, a little of A, a little of B... pinch of C...* Swoop 9:49 pm ((it'd be a REALLY complicated animatronic)) ((it makes sense to use cgi)) Magnum Ace 9:50 pm ((wow, did they really screw it up? VProwl 9:50 pm ((i'm blessed by a cruddy internet connection, it keeps stuttering and the image is low definition.)) Magnum Ace 9:50 pm ((shit, they did)) VProwl 9:50 pm ((i can't tell CGI from a jim henson puppet rn)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:50 pm ((i'm sorry ;; )) Windchill 9:50 pm *Blue slams her chubby hands over dad's eyes. He grunts, his mouth forming a firm line of patience.* *Can he see anything? No.* Prowl 9:51 pm ((it's for the best honestly Swoop 9:51 pm *is a lazy boy* *still twitchy and making constant noise* *but lazying with borb* Omicron 9:52 pm sparkling you'll get things faster if you're calming most times Windchill 9:53 pm *Tries to gently pry off one hand at a time, but with limited success. As in, none.* Swoop 9:53 pm ((fuckin brutal)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:54 pm [[They are all in trouble now...]] VProwl 9:54 pm Mm. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:55 pm *The Ripley human is dying, they're running out of bait, the Company is arrived...* VProwl 9:55 pm ... Why is it hunting them so fast? It's just using up its own food source. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:55 pm [[It came from a dog. Perhaps it doesn't have the intelligence the human-hosted ones do?]] *Shot in the dark. He has no idea why.* VProwl 9:56 pm The others hunted just as fast, didn't they? I just didn't notice at the time. Specs 9:57 pm ((oof, as a CGI animator, I feel the struggle making that beast, but at the same time...)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:57 pm [[Mm... true. More prey, here.]] Windchill 9:57 pm *Chirps plaintively, trying to coax his spawn into releasing his eyeballs. She does, and crawls down to rest on his shoulders like a fat scarf.* Finally. Specs 9:57 pm ((it definitely looks like they wiggled a rubber alien in front of a camera)) Windchill 9:58 pm (( It is a thing of beauty. )) Swoop 9:58 pm ((I love him taking his glasses off. He's ready for a real fight.)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:58 pm *Bows his helm a bit.* Omicron 9:59 pm dramadic VProwl 9:59 pm Unless the xenomorphs are secretly domesticated and provided prey at regular intervals by their owner species, they would easily and rapidly slaughter any natural range they live in, both by overbreeding and overhunting. Unless prey species are far more durable on their home planet? Windchill 10:00 pm *He picks up a few snacks to the tune of excited peeps and licks one before offering it to her.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:00 pm *Perk? It survived molten lead?* Omicron 10:00 pm I thought those things were spread out? Prowl 10:00 pm *not for long* Windchill 10:00 pm *She gobbles it down GREEDILY while he finally takes a seat, if only for a little while.* VProwl 10:01 pm *oh, they killed it with thermodynamics. Prowl's delighted.* Prowl 10:01 pm Ah, the lead on its body reacted to the cold water. Clever bit of thinking on their part. VProwl 10:01 pm *hey alternate hope you don't mind half the screen being covered in a fuckton of calculations pertaining to that maneuver because Prowl's delighted by it and wants to mull it over.* Prowl 10:02 pm *not at all, she absorbs the data along with him* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:02 pm *Slump. Never mind. It's dead, and now they've come for the Ripley human.*

[[They might hibernate, away from home. Wait for new hosts. New locations. The eggs last...]] VProwl 10:03 pm He's definitely lying. Windchill 10:04 pm *Blue snags another treat out of Chill's hand. She's rude.* Are you gonna watch the movie now? Omicron 10:05 pm ((soundwave mun, did I miss a posts from you from the trip to icy's ship? *poking things on tumblr*)) VProwl 10:05 pm Seems a poorer strategy than just evolving to not overhunt. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:05 pm ((i think you did? i don't remember seeing one from you after my last one)) Omicron 10:05 pm [bugger *goes to look*] Windchill 10:05 pm *Chill gets yelled at for daring to ask such an impertinent question. He'll be quiet, then.* Gross. Omicron 10:06 pm blah ItsyBitsySpyers 10:06 pm *And it's bowed again.*

[[A brave human.]] VProwl 10:06 pm ((i appreciate that a frigging alien is bursting out of her chest and her first instinct is to grab it by the neck.)) Omicron 10:07 pm *nods* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:07 pm ((time marker: 10:28pm)) Swoop 10:07 pm *looks at Bird sideways* Windchill 10:08 pm Well. They made another one after that. VProwl 10:08 pm *movie's over, he gets to look around again without depriving his alternate of the view.* Windchill 10:08 pm *He's trying to ignore the gross eating noises in his ear.* Specs 10:08 pm *the dragon squirms out from under the safety of Icy's wing* I need to go. Thank you for the movie, Soundwave! ItsyBitsySpyers 10:08 pm [[You're welcome, dragon.]] Magnum Ace 10:08 pm -peers down the stairs. It safe?- Prowl 10:09 pm A pity she had to sacrifice herself. *will end the connection with her alternate with a grateful ping* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm *Soundwave pings the baseball mechs. Yep. It's safe.*

[[Another? He knows of the fight with the Predators, but...]] *Shakes his helm a little.* [[He will look for it.]] VProwl 10:09 pm *acknowledgment ping.* Indeed. It was unfortunate. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:10 pm *It won't be the same without the Ripley human, though. She was one hell of a fighter.* Windchill 10:10 pm Yeah, or...so I hear. I haven't seen the entire thing. *Might have tried to watch and took a nap instead...maybe.* Omicron 10:11 pm *gives dragon one more lick in farewell, getting back up. paaauses, winces at some water of the floor* oh...sorry about that. Windchill 10:11 pm I think that's the order they go in. Swoop 10:11 pm Bird ItsyBitsySpyers 10:12 pm [[He appreciates the data.]]

*To Ice Queen.* [[We will clean it later.]]

{{Eh? What? What want?}} *Bird twitches awake.* Magnum Ace 10:12 pm -okay, good, he and Bull need to be going now- Swoop 10:12 pm Me Swoop want to nap too *twitches* Windchill 10:12 pm *Peers at Swoop from the corner of his optic. but is sure to not make eye contact. * Omicron 10:13 pm *Icy is still in a really good mood, so someone gets a headbump- carefully on her way out* [I'm apoofing] ItsyBitsySpyers 10:13 pm {{Oh. Come on, us go. Upstairs lounge good nap spot. Warm.}}

((bye all who are going!)) Windchill 10:13 pm (( 'Gnight! )) Swoop 10:14 pm *fidgets* Me Swoop.... other Dinobots. Windchill 10:15 pm *With a mouth full of half-chewed snacks, Blue peers around Chill's head at the rest of the room.* Magnum Ace 10:15 pm ((and g'night from me too)) ((thanks for the stream!)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:15 pm {{Ohhh. Kay. Hold on. Bird fix Swoop table.}}

*She'll start picking the snacks and things off of him so he can move without making a mess.* Omicron 10:16 pm (good night! and I'll hunt for that last post) Swoop 10:16 pm *nods his head and shuffles awkwardly in place once he can move* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:16 pm *She pats his cheek.* {{You Swoop go nap. Bird tell story after wake up.}} Windchill 10:17 pm *Are these people...edible?* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:17 pm *Ravage thinks so. Of course, he's out of his head on tinsel right now, and you probably shouldn't take advice from a cannibal anyway. Bad life decision.* Windchill 10:18 pm *Her dad is a cannibal, it runs in the family.* Swoop 10:19 pm *puffs up with a little bit of excitement* Kay. Windchill 10:19 pm *Everyone is too far away to hunt down for more snacks, so she'll go back to the ones in Chill's palm. Windchill, for his part, seems largely unaware of her malicious thoughts. Mostly.* Swoop 10:20 pm Me Swoop love You Bird : > ItsyBitsySpyers 10:20 pm {{You Swoop funny.}} *Pat pat.* Swoop 10:20 pm yah *and, with that, he hops off the table and out of Dancitron back to sleepy town in the Dinocave, the other Dinos will surely thank her for putting Swoop to bed* Windchill 10:21 pm *He has to wave bye at Swoop without turning his head, making him look like more of a weirdo than usual.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:22 pm *Bird cackles softly and floats back upstairs. Time for her to crash out as well. She doesn't sleep well unless the Boss sleeps well, and lately...* Windchill 10:23 pm I should take the bitty home, too. *Stands...CAREFULLY. Spawning requires having a sense of balance, apparently.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:23 pm *As a carrier unit, he'd believe it.*

[[Do so safely.]] Windchill 10:24 pm Mmmm. *Gives Soundwave a Look, as if he can't quite decide what the funniest response to that is.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:25 pm *That's probably for the best. Soundwave's being 1000% serious for Reasons.* Windchill 10:25 pm We'll try. I'm sure she'll keep me straight. Windchill 10:27 pm *He prods his spawn's pale underside; she's eaten enough to put him to shame today and he has to be careful with that, too.* Say bye, Blue. *The room at large gets a gross grunt and a yelled "BAH." Good enough.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:27 pm *Soundwave copies Windchill's "bye" and parrots it at Blue, whether she says it or not. Might as well be nice to younglings.* Windchill 10:28 pm Well..We tried. *Gives a mental shrug, and heads for the door.* Bye, suckers. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:29 pm [[Goodbye.]] Windchill 10:29 pm *Blue stares rudely back at Soundwave as they leave.* *The End.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:32 pm *Nobody here but him and two Prowls. He finally stops trying to look like he's alert and upright and leans into Prowl rather heavily.* VProwl 10:32 pm *meets him in the middle.* Prowl 10:34 pm *will leave with a ping to them both and drop it down to just one Prowl in the room* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:34 pm *Returns the ping goodbye.* [[...How tired are you.]] VProwl 10:35 pm *bitter laugh.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:36 pm [[You too.]] VProwl 10:37 pm Me too. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:38 pm [[Do you /feel/ like trying to recharge?]] VProwl 10:38 pm I'd better. Do you? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:40 pm [[...No. He'd rather not.]]

*Soundwave shakes his helm.*

[[He still hasn't figured out where to go on that... vacation. The one you suggested. He will look into that.]] *Rubs fin against Prowl's shoulder.* [[But you should. One of us should.]] VProwl 10:43 pm Mm. When did you last recharge? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:47 pm [[He tried th... four days ago.]] *Shakes his helm.* [[It's fine. He's gone longer.]] VProwl 10:48 pm ... What's AVERAGE for you? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:50 pm [[It used to be longer.]] *But Prowl's not going to let him have that answer, is he. Long vent.* [[Post-multiverse, twenty hours.]] VProwl 10:50 pm *Prowl stares.* ... What would help make it easier. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:51 pm [[Time travel.]] VProwl 10:51 pm What's plan B. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:53 pm [[Chips from - someone else. A few years ago. They'll give him another three days.]]

*He's banking on being so exhausted at that point he won't dream and can catch up on rest.* VProwl 10:54 pm "Chips"? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:57 pm *Pinches the air with thumb and a finger, leaving a tiny space.* [[Small devices. Plugged in. Temporary hack.]] VProwl 10:58 pm *DARK look.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:58 pm *Leans back.* VProwl 10:58 pm Side effects? Physical AND psychological? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:05 pm [[Slowed internal function in all but brain module, longer physical response times, processor overheating, chilling elsewhere, faint visual auras if optics move too quickly, increased paranoia, spark strain with use beyond recommended timespan, occasional docking program glitches. The glitches aren't suspicious; he investigated them himself and they are all a result of not sharing full process data with the creator.]] VProwl 11:07 pm Uh-huh. Go to sleep. Wake up screaming a few times. It's better for your system. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:10 pm [[Mph.]] *Soundwave buries his face again. He really doubts waking up terrified that he's become a zombie or that he's enslaved again or that he's had his spark ripped out or that he had to kill all of his minicons again is better for his spark than the chips.* VProwl 11:13 pm *... sighs, and leans more heavily on Soundwave.* Or get some software that'll regulate your defrag cycles or something. Staying up like that isn't healthy. /You/ know that. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:16 pm *Equivalent of a mutter.* [[Was trying to avoid going back to Ratchet.]]

*But he's not denying that it's unhealthy.*

[[Fine. Only if you rest as well. You were--]] *Spine twitch.* [[You need it, too. Sleeping through that crowd.]] VProwl 11:19 pm ... I've been sleeping. Just—not very well. Or long. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:20 pm [[As he said. You still need it too.]] *Sits up enough to look at Prowl.* [[Can he - is there /any/ way to help? Few see him working, but you are - you're the face of the police.]] VProwl 11:24 pm The face of the police spends most of his time in an office. They know I—well. They're under the impression that I personally fought a Megatron directly channeling the Dead Universe. They've been forgiving if I've had to reschedule a few meetings. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:27 pm [[As they should be.]] *But even now, he has his worries.* [[You're sure none of them want to try it themselves? The channeling. And the Constructicons - are they helping?]] VProwl 11:29 pm Channeling the Dead Universe? God no. Unicron might have been mythologized as a dangerous source of immense power in YOUR universe—but in MINE, the Dead Universe is associated with nothing except danger. *doesn't answer the Constructicon question.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:30 pm *He hears - or, more appropriately, doesn't hear - that dodge, there.*

[[If you need somewhere else to be...]] VProwl 11:31 pm ... You don't need to—to make a special offer out of it. Thought you always set aside movie nights for me. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:32 pm [[He does. He meant other nights.]] VProwl 11:33 pm You're not sleeping. *half shrug.* I think I caused your berth enough trauma the last time we were left together without supervision. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:38 pm [[/That./]] *Strange, low, electronic warbling noise.* [[He didn't - /doesn't/, care about that. It was just a berth.]] *And it's been fixed, besides.* [[He only meant to offer you the right to stay in the apartment alone if you needed it. He isn't using it right now. Won't be, on vacation.]] VProwl 11:39 pm I was joking. My point is—there's no point in sleeping at your place if I'm not sleeping with you. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:41 pm *...That reminds him. He's been wondering all about Prowl's breakdown that night. There isn't time to ask about it right now, and he doesn't want Prowl to think he'd only brought it up to escape talking about the rest of everything anyway. But he will, soon. He promises himself that much.*

[[Oh.]] *Lifts his head and looks at the stairs.* [[...Come with him, then?]]

*Ravage and Laserbeak could use the break from being in the room with him when he tries to rest anyway.* VProwl 11:43 pm *pauses, then nods.* Are you going to try to recharge tonight? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:48 pm [[He supposes so.]] *Faintly playfully, in that really exhausted and sort of resigned way:* [[The law frowns on his intended alternative.]] *And just in case, a humor tag.*

*He carefully extricates himself from Prowl, gets up - that is definitely a wobble - and stares a moment longer. A reassurance must be given before he can go on vacation in a couple of weeks. Or try sleeping tonight.*

[[You'll tell someone if you do require more assistance? Himself, Tarantulas, Ratchet, his alternate... somebody.]] VProwl 11:49 pm They're illegal, too?! *Soundwave. Soundwave please. Soundwave you're killing him.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:51 pm [[...You. He meant you.]] VProwl 11:52 pm ... Oh. *can you tell how sleep-deprived he is.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:53 pm *About as much as him, it seems.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:54 pm *He's still staring.* VProwl 11:55 pm *he gets to his feet as well, and automatically puts a hand to the small of Soundwave's back; he saw that wobble.* I promise. I'll talk to someone if I need it. I've—already talked to Tarantulas, a little. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:57 pm *Silently appreciative. He doesn't need it while standing still, but they'll be going upstairs in a second.*

[[Good. Good. Did he - did it help?]] Yesterday VProwl 11:57 pm *... nods.* Some. VProwl 12:01 am ... You tell someone if you need more help, too. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:02 am *Relieved. At least he isn't keeping it all to himself.*

[[Then he owes Tarantulas his gratitude.]] *Straightens up some.* [[He won't pry unless you open that door first.]] *Prowl talked to someone. If Prowl doesn't want to tell him right away, or ever, that's fine.*

[[Ravage and Laserbeak have been watching over him. The others as well, but - mostly them. He will tell them.]]

[[For now... yes. Recharge.]] VProwl 12:03 am *a weary nod. And up the stairs they go.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:05 am *He'll be asleep before he finishes getting comfortable.*

[aion-rsa]

Why Pokémon Has Endured For 25 Years

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This article is presented by:

In 1996, Joseph Tobin was a professor of early education at the University of Hawaii when he decided to walk into a hobby store in Kaimuki for field research.

“They had some Pokémon stuff—the Japanese versions of the cartridges,” Tobin recalls. “People could buy them in this store before they were even available elsewhere. We interviewed the owner and decided that Pokémon would be a really interesting thing to study.”

Tobin had a pre-existing interest in Japanese culture from time spent in Japan as an exchange student and therefore continued his research in other hobby shops and toy stores throughout Honolulu. As the years progressed, he traded Pokémon cards with children who were adamant that he would not get ripped off in lopsided swaps. He followed as a colleague’s six-year-old son spent 90-plus hours with his Pokémon Blue cartridge for the Nintendo Game Boy, learning to read, understanding maps, and calculating sums in the process.

The years of Poké studies culminated in Tobin hosting an academic conference in 2000, where educators, anthropologists, and other cultural experts gathered in Honolulu to discuss this massive, yet certainly fleeting, Pokémon phenomenon. The findings and arguments of the conference were collected in the insightful and thoroughly-researched, yet tragically named, Pikachu’s Global Adventure: The Rise and Fall of Pokémon.

“We thought we better hurry and get this out before the craze is over,” Tobin says.

25 years later and the Pokémon craze is nowhere near over. 

Today, Pokémon is one of the most successful, if not the most successful entertainment entities in human history. Pokémon is the highest-grossing media franchise of all time, having taken in an estimated $88 billion in revenue. According to eBay, there were 160 million searches on the platform for Pokémon cards last year, and they outsold even baseball cards. In December of last year, a Base set 1st edition PSA-graded 10 “shadowless” Charizard card sold on eBay for a staggering $350,100. The Pokémon games are now in their eighth generation and have sold over 340 million units. The long-running anime is in its 24th year and features more than 1,100 episodes. 

In defense of Tobin and The Rise and Fall of Pokémon’s title, the franchise, created by Game Freak and Nintendo, did seem like it was on the ropes in the early 2000s. “Pokémania” had largely died out and financial markers like the Pokémon card market had cooled. But Pokémon didn’t need a lengthy Pokémania to become one of the most successful entertainment franchises ever. To find success, all Pokémon needed was a consistent track record of innovative creators behind the scenes and a dedicated fan base of children—and eventually adults—willing to catch them all. 

“This will probably be something you hear from me and the rest of the team at Pokémon a lot. But Pokémon really is for everyone,” says Daniel Benkwitt, Senior Manager, Communications & Public Relations for The Pokémon Company International. “As long time fans will tell you, Pokémon has always been around throughout many iterations. The fans have been dedicated to Pokémon for 25 years, no matter when they came in.”

Benkwitt has a unique perspective on the nature of Pokémon’s ebbs and flows. Now working on the franchise’s 25th-anniversary celebrations, Benkwitt joined the Pokémon Company during Pokémon’s 20th anniversary—the same year that the massively popular augmented reality mobile game Pokémon Go debuted.

“I was excited to work on an exciting franchise, but who knew what it was actually going to be once Pokémon Go had launched?” he says. “Truly, Pokémon Go on the 20th anniversary brought Pokémon back into the zeitgeist.”

In many ways, Pokémon Go served as a reminder of what the Poké die-hards already knew: this is Pikachu’s world and we’re just living in it. Whether it be through the series of beloved games, a highly successful card game, long-running anime, or sheer power of brand alone, Pokémon is one of the last quarter century’s big pop culture winners. 

The reasons why Pokémon survived its early fad status to blossom into a titan of entertainment are varied and innumerable, but it all starts with accessibility.

“There’s a variety of different ways and different touchpoints that fans can enter into Pokémon. My personal story is the anime,” Benkwitt says. “For a lot of folks, it was the video games, because that truly is the core of the franchise. Everything emanates out from there.”

Let the Poké Games Begin!

Pokémon Red and Green first premiered in Japan on Feb. 27, 1996. Its English counterparts, Red and Blue, would arrive in North America in 1998. Just about everything that’s appealing about the Pokémon franchise is apparent in those first two installments: exploration, training, trading, battling. The games capture creator Satoshi Tajiri’s experience of collecting insects as a boy in Japan, scaled up and fine-tuned for a larger, and eventually more Western audience. 

The games have evolved over the years, moving from a Matrix-green original Game Boy sprite display to the gorgeous, full-color three dimensions of Nintendo Switch. Along the way, new generations of fans have found their respective access points into the games and the franchise at large.

Pokémon content creator Ron Sroor is part of the next wave of Pokémon fandom, having been born after Red and Blue even debuted. He knows as well as anyone that the appeal of Pokémon has been constant, even if the heights of the franchise have waxed and waned. 

“To the people who were around at the beginning of Pokémania, it seemed like it was dying down, and it definitely was,” Sroor says. “But it never stopped being big. It was going from the biggest thing ever to just a normal, big thing.”

Like Benkwitt, Sroor came to Pokémon through the anime before coming to appreciate the larger tapestry of the franchise through the Pokémon Black and White games, which are set in a world approximating his native New York City. Now Sroor interacts with Pokémon fans via a variety of creative YouTube videos in which he discusses elements of the games like tier lists for powerful Pokémon, and shares his own artistic Pokémon renditions.

“I think the Pokémon are the draw of the franchise. They’re the perfect formula for creating creatures that aren’t too monstrous, but also not too childish or too cute,” he says. “Every single Pokémon is based on something, whether it be an animal or myth, and every location in the game or in the show or whatever is based on places in the real world.”

Cardboard Craze

Though the Pokémon series of games were the progenitor of the franchise, Pikachu and friends quickly proved too big to be contained by only one medium. The Pokémon Trading Card Game was first published by Wizards of the Coast in October 1996, just eight months after Red and Blue’s debut. These days, the Pokémon Trading Card Game (now under the auspices of The Pokémon Company) is considered one of the “Big Three” TCGs, alongside Magic: The Gathering and Yu-Gi-Oh!. 

Competitive Pokémon TCG player Andrew Mahone recalls experiencing the first wave of Pokemania when he was in fourth grade. 

“1999—it was everywhere. Kids were playing the cards at recess, at the pool, wherever we went. I got captivated by the initial craze as it was the cultural phenomenon happening at the time. And being 10 years old, you’re the same age as the hero in the Pokémon franchise. So it really hit home with me there.”

Like many other kids of his generation, Mahone set Pokémon aside throughout his high school years and picked up a diverse array of other interests like soccer, skateboarding, and competitive running. It was during college, however, that Mahone met back up with the franchise that never truly went away, playing Pokémon Diamond and Pearl on the bus to and from track meets.

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“I fell in love with the franchise all over again doing that, and I played the DS game for hundreds of hours throughout my college career. When I graduated college, that’s when I was like, ‘Okay. Well, now I want something else that’s competitive to do now that I’m done with sports.’ That’s where I got into competitive Pokémon.”

Mahone attended his first competitive TCG event in 2012 and won his first regional championship in 2015. By 2017, he was making YouTube videos about the competitive Pokémon TCG scene. That channel has now evolved into his multimedia enterprise Tricky Gym, supported by Full Grip Games.

As part of the Pokémon TCG diaspora, Mahone has had a front-row seat to the game’s latest renaissance, this time likely driven by young adults looking to connect with their past while stuck indoors due to COVID lockdowns.

“We see a lot of young adults now in their mid-20s and 30s revisiting Pokémon because they have such strong nostalgic feelings for it. It came out in this very impactful time in their early childhood.”

I Wanna Be the Very Best…

One of the reasons that so many adults have warm fuzzies for the franchise is the storytelling around it. Premiering in 1997, the anime story of Ash Ketchum and his quest to become a Pokémon master has been a constant companion of the franchise through 24 years and hundreds of episodes. It also had a tremendous impact on the woman who would one day voice the young hero of Pallet Town.

“It was hard for me even as a kid to see it as a fad, because of the show,” Sarah Natochenny says. “It had heart, relatable characters, and adorable, unique creatures. This wasn’t just a game or set of toys. Pokémon had a story.”

Natochenny is an artist with eclectic talents and interests. After winning a bronze medal at the Junior Olympics in rhythmic gymnastics in 1999, she studied at the Strasberg Theater Institute for four years while also doing improv at UCB, and taking voice and dance classes on the side. In 2006, she auditioned for the role of Ash Ketchum in the Pokémon anime’s English dub, taking over for the role’s progenitor, Veronica Taylor.

“Pokémon was the biggest job I booked. It was only my second voiceover job, after a medical industrial,” Natochenny says. “I was the perfect age when Pokémon first came to America, and I loved the show and remember begging my parents for the cards. I had one deck. I have no idea where it is or whether or not there was a million-dollar card in there.”

Since 2006, Natochenny has voiced Ash, his mom Delia, along with a host of other human and Pokémon characters (Buneary being a particular favorite because it’s very cute). As part of the Pokémon 25th anniversary, Natochenny is most looking forward to wrapping up work on Pokémon the Movie: Secrets of the Jungle, along with some of the other planned festivities. 

“I’m looking forward to celebrating with fans and continuing to bring joy to people who grew up with my portrayal of their favorite character. I’ll also probably dance to the music that comes out, so tune in to my social media to see if those dance classes paid off,” she says. 

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25 Years of Pokémon

As Natochenny suggests, The Pokémon Company indeed has big plans—musical and otherwise—for the franchise’s 25th anniversary.

The team has been working on the celebration for over a year and has partnered with UMG and Katy Perry for a year-long musical campaign called P25 Music. Other corporate partners include Build-A-Bear Workshop, General Mills, Levi’s, McDonald’s, Jazwares, Scholastic, Mattel, Funko, PowerA, and The Wand Company (which is manufacturing a lifelike Poké Ball). And there are still more announcements to come.

“All I can say is, stay tuned because the rest of the year is going to be quite exciting with more surprises. Pokémon likes to surprise its fans,” Benkwitt says.

One thing that wouldn’t surprise its fans is if Pokémon one day observed a 50th- anniversary celebration, or even a centennial. It certainly wouldn’t surprise Tobin, who is still an early education professor, now at the University of Georgia.

“I’m not surprised that [Pokémon] has lasted this long in the sense that I think it’s really good,” he says. “It was really cleverly designed and it has a really rich narrative. I’m happy to see that it’s made it.”

Shop Pokémon on eBay today!

The post Why Pokémon Has Endured For 25 Years appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[entergamingxp]

The Origami King Review — The Legion of Stationary

July 24, 2020 1:00 PM EST

As a longtime fan of the series, Paper Mario: The Origami King has its trademark humor and charm, but misses its appealing RPG gameplay.

Paper Mario: The Origami King tries its darndest to straddle the line between what fans of the original games love and a desire to move the franchise in a new direction. In many ways, it succeeds. However, there are countless misfolds along the way that makes it a tough game to give a full recommendation.

In The Origami King, a tiny origami man named Olly has turned the Mushroom Kingdom into an origami world. Princess Peach is a soulless zombie doing Olly’s bidding, and Mario must save her and the world from his evil creases. Joining you is Olivia, Olly’s sister, and a powerful origami folder in her own right. Your journey takes you all over the Kingdom, letting you explore exotic locales and meeting interesting people.

The biggest talking point of Paper Mario: The Origami King is the new battle system. It’s a tough thing to describe with just words, but essentially, each fight takes place on a battleground you can twist and move. This allows to you set up fights in a way that lets you easily manipulate the positioning of Olly’s minions as you see fit.

Once you set the folded fighters up, you have two basic attacks; Mario can stomp and he can swing a hammer. There are a few other special items and attacks, but these two are the plumber’s bread and butter. Or wrench and plunger, if you want to get technical. There’s also a bit of active time button pressing that lets you deal extra damage, but it never seems that important. For the most part, every single battle against minor minions works exactly the same. There are a few enemies that spice things up, just not in a meaningful way.

“Paper Mario: The Origami King tries its darndest to straddle the line between what fans of the original games love and a desire to move the franchise in a new direction.”

And that’s one of Paper Mario: The Origami King’s biggest problems: there’s no leveling up. You can get somewhat better shoes and hammers to make your attacks stronger, it just never feels like a big deal. Thus, the battles feel like at worst a way for the developers to steal your good items and at best a waste of time. After the first hour or so, I was doing everything I could to skip them. Fortunately, most minions are easier to dodge than a 90-year-old grandma.

All that being said, there is a very important caveat to all of this; while the normal enemy encounters are dreadful, the boss battles are inspired. Instead of Mario being at the center of the board and you rotating the enemies into place, these flip the script. Mario is on the outside and while using different symbols on the board, you need to trace his path to the different members of the Legion of Stationary. That’s an all-time great pro wrestling stable name if I’ve ever seen one.

“Paper Mario: The Origami King doesn’t respect your time with combat. There seems to be little to no point in engaging with minion battles.”

They really go all out with these. Every boss has their own mechanic to tease out, with some of the early ones being spectacular. The boss fights do lose a little steam as you move toward the end, particularly with a boss that can kill you in one hit and force you to replay their entire section before trying again. I pray it doesn’t happen to you because it was so frustrating to make one wrong decision and be sent back 20 minutes of progress. That said, the final boss fight ramps it back up in a way I can appreciate. I won’t spoil it, but seeing a former nemesis join the fight in a “big” way was great. Make sure you bookmark that last sentence so you can come back and appreciate my awesome pun.

Even still, Paper Mario: The Origami King doesn’t respect your time with combat. There seems to be little to no point in engaging with minion battles. Along with that, the time between bosses stretches out to hours. Unless you’re a kid on a summer break, it’s a hard game to recommend based on the combat alone.

Fortunately, that’s not all The Origami King brings to the table. The series is well-known for its humor and exploration; both of those are here in spades. Personally, I gave up on exploring much after the first few hours because it just felt like collecting things for the sake of collecting. And the game constantly asks you to backtrack anyway. It all just got old quick. However, if you can actually take your time and not play under the constraints of needing to get a review out, I can see this being an excellent podcast game. You can just veg out and find some Toads. And truly, isn’t that all you can ask for.

“I genuinely laughed out loud more times than I can count in my 30 or so hours with the game.”

The Origami King also mostly nails the funnies. I mean sure, when you’re launching one-liners with every other line of dialogue, a few are bound to hit. That said, I genuinely laughed out loud more times than I can count in my 30 or so hours with the game. Kamek, in particular, does an exceptional turn as Bowser’s underlooked right-hand wizard. There’s also a secret coffee shop where you can meet up with some of Bowser’s other henchman, which might be the best part of the game. If you pick up Paper Mario’s latest journey, seek it out.

Here’s the thing though: The Origami King also takes a few surprisingly dark turns. I don’t want to spoil anything, but there are quite a few story beats that made me wonder if this really is a kid’s game. If you’re a parent picking this up, be ready for some potential waterworks and tough conversations coming your way.

“The puzzle-based nature of the combat seems like a fun direction to take the gameplay in, but divorcing it from progression kills any desire to engage with it.”

At the end of my time with Paper Mario: The Origami King, I’m wondering who exactly this game is for. Classic Paper Mario fans will be left wanting due to the game’s combat and lack of RPG progression. People looking for a fun romp with a silly story might bristle at the game’s length and padded out content.

And kids? In so many ways, this seems like a great game for younger gamers; however, I can’t help remember several moments that would have left me in tears as a little dude. If you’re a parent who thinks your kid can handle it, this is an excellent pick-up. You’ll certainly get your money’s worth from a time perspective. Just don’t come to me if you also have to pay some psychiatrist bills in a few years.

I’m mostly joking (pour one out for Bobby). However, it really does feel like a game that doesn’t completely know what it wants to be. The puzzle-based nature of the combat seems like a fun direction to take the gameplay in, but divorcing it from progression kills any desire to engage with it.

“At the end of my time with Paper Mario: The Origami King, I’m wondering who exactly this game is for.”

Paper Mario: The Origami King is far from a bad game; it’s just not one that meets its potential. This feels like a solid first step from Intelligent Systems to finally find a new groove for the franchise. Hopefully the team continues to iterate on the design and deliver a follow-up that finally mixes that classic Paper Mario tone and feel with quality gameplay that fans love. It can, and arguably should, be different from the original games, but it needs to be more than this.

July 24, 2020 1:00 PM EST

from EnterGamingXP https://entergamingxp.com/2020/07/the-origami-king-review-the-legion-of-stationary/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=the-origami-king-review-the-legion-of-stationary

[bloojayoolie]

Af, Anime, and Apparently: , Okay Ibl, story ame when I wss younger, had this Irish friend who pred our school when w as like 17, Dude ded recently nd here丐the ballad of the merveeus bsstard be average as fuck 17 year old Bribong Some foreign guy has just joined, his family just moved here city called Dery in Mgved here with his dad and his lite sister, his mum died when he was younger He gets put in my class and ends up stting nest to me This is howl met Eigh-Beers Mgee the all him Call him a hippo because of his fucking industrial size frant teeth and his big flucking lps Greg uses his adism to get out of doing and saying whatever the fuck he wants noing EB wth she lke Greg has his desk very paricularly arranged, pens on one side in a straight ine pencis on the other Dude is OCD as fuck with his pencilcase and shit Goes nuts i anything gets moved, so this desk is sightly apart from everyone elses We all get in shit twe fuck with him an purpose, We ought to know better The sutistic hippo keeps trying to get a reaction out of EB the whole class All af a sudden EB just casualy raises a foot and pushes the Hppo's desk right the fuck over Teacher hurries oer and trying to explan to EB atma Gregs autism while Greg teaks the tack G in his chair, breathing reawy ss thoug gh nong bd sheer辍tstie resentment EB looks at Greg and betsthe teacher "Oh sorry, wedant have Wid bump with more nenhinbeland' h on EB's third day at our school He's a pretty cool guyikes the 쑈me vidya and movies as me and is a big fan of Rugby, was captan of his team back iieland ell hem the school has s rughy searn he says EB goes to check it out, starts off on the lower team because hes think theyire ston of kind of fast runners gets recks fucking everyone that next hal f hel take him Jumps on him, grabs him by the neck to pull him down and iterally rolls on him ike a fucking rolling pn -EB didniteven have the bal What the fook you playin at son I didnt even have the ball, do you even know how to fookin play the game lad EB grins You know over in Ireland you have to be fit to play sports, the fatties get leit on the sideline EB grabs his amn and tosses him to the ground dude twists his anke or something and starts twitching and squeaking lke a baby elephant with parkinsons EB gets put on top team Anonymous (D wHTHOgC) 03 19/14(Wedj20 28 25 UTC-5 No 538041137 Reple 41T months without inc dont give long as youre cool to him dents aside from a few close cals with Greg the Mildly Autistic Hppo e pretty close Apparently ㅲ Ireland they don't have gangs they have paramitanes fighting between whether Northern lreland ts Britsh or hsh >He plays 4down a kal, bd ican tell some shit mu have Pagpened because he always changes the subject when gets clos·tohame Edgy fapgot Luke comes back to school Luke hangs around with a pack of riggers who are all apparenty in a gang, he les to pretend he's part of this "gang" and carries this fucking Stanky e around that he panted red and bue for some reason aOne day at lunch Like corries up to EBied o ofnotere starts askrig his datisalcoholc Nope aound Tm guessin your mam had a far lew belore you were born though mate Well tuck Ind wanna sift speI had to sht out a dat bastardlke yourset. Jog on ン"You win t)4ck with the wrong person t y inst, boy?" EB starts laughing, IHeraly loses his sht at the ste of this Itle fagpot in a trenchc oat with a stanley knfe and actualy presses EB grabs his wrist, takes the fabled blade from the hands of the chosen one tosses t over a fence and punches him straight in the face We're out geting beer, Tm with a 7/10 GT that Ive had a crush on for tucking months Her and EB get along realy wel, athough I sort of think she only hung out with us because EB did That right when we're all drunk, me and QT end up fucking Leaving out my side because this is the ballad of Eght Beer, not me Spend ages taking with QT,estabǐshthat shè apparenty seat, ikes me back EB heads up to bed, I stay down with the other guys to watch TV, QT was askeep when 1 came down QT comes running do wwith a towel round her, soaking wet, and rung out the ont door Apparently EB sleeps naked, not surpnised since Ive found him naked before after a night of drinking Says she came on to himeven ater all he shit she said aLaugh숨 and says he took aprt to bed with hm,awas cn e tablo and when she ed onwth him he lossed all over her Threw her clothes out the wendow into the rain and told her to go and fetch Two weeks later he takes me to a pub and hooks me up with a 910 Anonymous (TDwHT HOC) 03/1914(Wed 20.43 59 UTC-5 No 538044014 Raps.4380408044772 332420 EB and me are total bros after being fnends for a few years 가%aving hm as a best friend is Ike havngtose nasty trainers as a kid Shit get pretty he avy >Him and E汨were close, mostly because EB would buy him vidya and act super interested in the anime sht he lied because nobody else other than me would loses his har chermo aGotovst him, EBisgung me there >He thinks rs awesome get our photo taken together witout any har EB lets him draw all kinds of dumb sh on his bad head, lets him draw a dumb moustache on him o Spend ages just dicking a >Son of a bitch luke who R is, Dukey the Rookie is across the bar in the same tucking trenchcoat he wore back at school >EB says hi chats away to him lbe nothing ever happened >We head home and EB spend the night sitting up with me playing Batlefront on my old P52 and drinking, just trying to cheer me up me every time Sorry for that 2sad4me post, but iti make sense later Anonymous (IO woitth%) 05/19/14(Wed)20 52 46 UTC-5 No 530045357 Reeses 씌38amsrme esaaa Lving together in a let with some chick and her boyfriend The one song I remember is "Uncle Tommy by The Rumjacks, because it played when sht went down EB told them that he "ain't lookin any trouble lads, have a beer and forget that tripe for the night aye? 4 of them jump on him, start beating the shit out of him -l tackle one of them to try help him, get the fuck beaten out of me but fuck that it's goddamn E8 in there EB broke the dudes fucking am He gets up, bleeding out of every pore in his beaunful iwish body Bouncing around with his fists up, Ieraly looks ike he could fly around the room he's bouncing that much The skinheads keep going for him but back off every time aher he swings, it looks lke he could knock a building down with that sh Babbling some incoherent shit in lrish rage, nobody understands the words but everyone understands the meaning pack up there sht ike a scene from a fucking move Eight tucking beersl You splied eight of me fucking beers you hairless tuckin mongrels Eight beers lad, eight fucking beers What's the fucking craic there lke Anonymous (D: wHTiHOgC) 031914(Wed]21:6 02 UTC-5 No. 538047326 EB sgoing back to Ireland to vist his nan, she's real sick 기we lar dr, Befast-thritrs the captal of the oth but not of Ireland ckhow t wori ed EB never eaty expla edit, 5ad you wont understand the bullsh politics unless you grew up there go 1o vist his nan with EB' Sweetest tucking old lady ever, says that EB was always a rough lad but awk he'd never hurt a sour greedy fucker This woman is clearly the most infuenial famly member in the Eight Beer famly EE shows me round Derry, tels me about how 5pIt relgusy and shows methes bg ass wall cood place Takes me to Belast agan and shows methe pace wherethe ttanc was bu -we end up going to place caled The Crown Bar Ger pretty drunk, or Tpped as EB calls it Walked around Belfast for a bt, he tells me about the history of some stuf »Spend a few nights there, have a fucking blast but decide to head home don't wanna be an inrusion on the whole nan stustion Lad you're practicaly a part of the famly Anonymous D wH7HOQC) 03/19/14Wd21 18 48 UTC-5 No 538040230 Getting close to the end now Shits hard to wrte, I miss hat fucker Life is prety uneventful for a wle pparentty some Kiddy Fiddler called Wilm Whight fucked EB when totally agan family home a load of sht, fucks 2EB spends all nut there next to her, nearly gets wolent when staff ask harto leave so doctors can sort some 닸官out calm him down and we wat r, hosptzd for brig bme B's Sister gets beter, but is pretty fucked for life Never taks never leaves the house she's pretty much a goddarmn vegetable EB spends all of his time off work with her, never comes out anymore, just sts in with her. We sometimes come ound and drink with him but he refuses to leave the house -One night while he's sieeping, EB's fucked up sister C's faul, that's pretty much the main subject of t. I don't get why she'd need to say that but whabever Tels me he waan't that close with his family back home his dad is fucked up with grief and everythings just a mess ie doesn't want to go home because he has nothng there other than remnders, but doesn't want to stay here because of what has pened Does his best to be the usual bi9dck coolguy that he always was, puts on a brave face but f you c h him on his own he's luckn9 merable ite gets in 갠 few fights when we're ot dmkrg ry one who gnestmamy 5hvt gets m edistety fucking amidated none ofths ads everyone on" that he used to do s fighting back tears already guessed, but he starts teling me about how he blames himseffor what 거had pened to his sis have tucking known better >Lterally carrot change his mid anthis shit, looks like he has himse#1uly convinced th this is his taut we talk about old imes laugh a be things actualy seem back to normal for whie Ainight mabe. Let's have one for old tme's sake, ae? Hie eventualily leaves, but before he goes he tells me that 'You've been a good mate from day one mate. Honestly out on a limb rd do fuckin' anything for ya Take t easy lad speti ong tme EB doesn't reply to teats or Cutign place doeant answer B tucking hung himsel is fanly tatoo many things that I don't need thanked every tme fucker

[junker-town]

Here’s this week’s NFL mock draft — with TRADES

Ohio State cornerback prospect Jeff Okudah will likely be a top-10 pick in 2020.

Deals are part of every draft. This week’s NFL mock looks at some that could happen.

Trades are the single most intriguing part of any NFL Draft. It will be no different for the 2020 iteration. Four of the first 32 picks have already been moved, but they all come at pick No. 18 or later.

Rest assured, plenty of picks inside the top 10 will get moved. Last year 12 picks in the first round changed hands. That includes the No. 30 being swapped three times.

This week’s mock draft might not explore trades that complex, but it makes some predictions about which teams could be moving around in the first round.

1. Cincinnati Bengals: Joe Burrow, QB, LSU

2. Washington: Chase Young, DE, Ohio State

When is the last time the first and second picks in the draft were so obvious before the NFL Scouting Combine? It might have been 2015, when Jameis Winston and Marcus Mariota went first and second. Before them, it was probably 2010 with Sam Bradford and Ndamukong Suh. All that really means is that we should easily be able to predict the 2025 draft when the time comes.

TRADE: Miami sends pick Nos. 5 and 18 to Detroit for pick No. 5.

3. Miami Dolphins: Tua Tagovailoa, QB, Alabama

The Dolphins have plenty of draft ammunition to move up to get Tagovailoa. While the teams directly in front of them don’t need a quarterback, the teams behind them do. Instead of chancing things, they can shift some excess draft capital.

4. New York Giants: Isaiah Simmons, LB, Clemson

If Miami does trade up to No. 3, the speculation with the draft starts with the Giants. If they can fight the right partner, they could even move back a few picks and still get a starter-level offensive tackle in the top 10. If they stay here, they could go after a superstar player like Simmons. New York’s defense is low on playmakers, and pass rusher Markus Golden is a free agent.

5. Detroit Lions: Jeff Okudah, CB, Ohio State

No team gave up more than Detroit’s 284.4 yards passing per game last season, and it was particularly bad down the stretch, allowing more than 300 yards per game in the final three weeks. The Lions need a lockdown cornerback like Okudah. They’d be justified in taking him third overall, so it would be a coup to drop back and get him and another first-round pick this year.

6. Los Angeles Chargers: Justin Herbert, QB, Oregon

Barring a free agent signing, the Chargers definitely need Herbert in the first round this year. If they do, the rest of their offseason plan has to involve improving a porous offensive line.

TRADE: Jacksonville sends pick Nos. 9 and 42 to Carolina for pick No. 7

7. Jacksonville Jaguars (via Carolina Panthers): Derrick Brown, DT, Auburn

If Brown doesn’t get selected in the first six picks, the Jaguars would be smart to jump up and not risk losing out on him. Jacksonville had one of the NFL’s worst run defenses last season, and Brown should help improve it. With two-first round picks because of the Jalen Ramsey trade, the Jaguars could get creative.

8. Arizona Cardinals: Tristan Wirfs, OT, Iowa

If a couple of trades happen in front of them, the Cardinals could get lucky and have their pick of offensive linemen. Wirfs might be a right tackle, but he’s a sensational one. He has the athleticism teams covet and would help keep Kyler Murray upright.

9. Carolina Panthers: Javon Kinlaw, DT, South Carolina

The best way for a new head coach to reshape a roster in his vision is to acquire draft picks. With a seven-year contract in hand, new Panthers coach Matt Rhule could take that approach to Carolina. Passing on Brown will be difficult, but getting an extra second-round pick this year could be worth it. While Kinlaw isn’t the run stuffer Brown is, he’s a standout talent who creates pressure up the middle.

TRADE: Las Vegas sends pick Nos. 12, 80, and a 2021 second-rounder to Cleveland for pick No. 10

10. Las Vegas Raiders: Jerry Jeudy, WR, Alabama

Another team with multiple first-round picks is the Raiders, who could also get creative. Specifically, they may want to get ahead of the Jets to take the wideout they prefer. That could be Jeudy, a smooth receiver who should make an impact immediately in the NFL.

11. New York Jets: CeeDee Lamb, WR, Oklahoma

It’s true, the Jets could take an offensive tackle here, and it would be a fine choice. Sam Darnold has almost no weapons on offensem though. Robby Anderson, his best wide receiver, could sign elsewhere this offseason. Keeping Darnold’s pocket clean is nice, but he needs to throw someone the ball.

12. Cleveland Browns: Jedrick Wills, OT, Alabama

Once again, the Browns have a new general manager and head coach, and they could take advantage of the draft’s offensive tackle depth and move down while getting extra picks. Whether it’s Wills, Georgia’s Andrew Thomas, or Louisville’s Mekhi Becton, they should be able to find a starting tackle in this range.

13. Indianapolis Colts: Jordan Love, QB, Utah State

Surprise! Love’s production dipped in 2019, but the Colts could get desperate after an up-and-down season from Jacoby Brissett once he replaced Andrew Luck. If the Colts convince themselves that Love really is the next Patrick Mahomes, they will jump on him in the top 15.

14. Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Mekhi Becton, OT, Louisville

Look, of course the Buccaneers need to figure out quarterback and their pass rush. But year after year, this team manages to ignore the offensive line. Since 2016, Tampa Bay has drafted just two offensive linemen. Not two tackles or two guards. Two total in four drafts.

15. Denver Broncos: Henry Ruggs III, WR, Alabama

We’re back to Ruggs landing in Denver. It just fits. Ruggs is a deep speed receiver, and Broncos quarterback Drew Lock is a deep-ball specialist. Next.

16. Atlanta Falcons: A.J. Epenesa, DE, Iowa

If Epenesa is available for the Falcons, it’s hard to say no. The Falcons could lose Vic Beasley and Adrian Clayborn this offseason, and Takkarist McKinley is a free agent after the 2020 season. The pass rush situation for Atlanta is dire.

17. Dallas Cowboys: Grant Delpit, S, LSU

Don’t forget, after the 2018 season, people were gaga for Delpit. Like, top-five pick gaga. His 2019 was a bit of a letdown, but he was hurt and asked to play deep safety more often. When he’s healthy, he’s a playmaker.

18. Detroit Lions (via Pittsburgh via Miami): K’Lavon Chaisson, Edge, LSU

Despite adding Trey Flowers last offseason, the Lions still need someone who can get to the quarterback. Chaisson is a bit of a projection, but in the right system he can make an impact as a standup edge player.

19. Las Vegas Raiders (via Chicago Bears): Trevon Diggs, CB, Alabama

The Raiders took Trayvon Mullen in the second round last year and could find him a partner on the outside in the first round this year. Diggs is a big cornerback who can press and stick with speed receivers, even at 6’2.

20. Jacksonville Jaguars: (via Los Angeles Rams): Kristian Fulton, CB, LSU

The Jaguars became a good team a couple seasons ago thanks to a stellar defense. With a second first-round pick in the draft, they can rebuild that side of the ball in a big way. Fulton has good size and speed for the position, and can play in the slot or outside.

21. Philadelphia Eagles: Laviska Shenault Jr., WR, Colorado

A run on defenders in front of them could be beneficial for the Eagles. That would allow a wide receiver to slip to them, whether it’s Shenault, Clemson’s Tee Higgins, or Penn State’s K.J. Hamler.

22. Buffalo Bills: Tee Higgins, WR, Clemson

The Bills lack a wide receiver with size who can make a difference. Higgins, at 6’4 with jump ball skills, checks that box. Higgins is going to get dinged in the draft because his speed is relatively normal. But few receivers can match him for his ability to go up and get the ball.

23. New England Patriots: Jacob Eason, QB, Washington

In any other year when they don’t have a second-round pick, the Patriots would likely move down. But strange things happen when a quarterback is at stake. In this case, it’s for the chance at landing a project player with upside in Eason. The Patriots could go from Drew Bledsoe to Tom Brady to a Drew Bledsoe clone.

TRADE: Miami sends pick Nos. 26 and 70 to New Orleans for pick No. 24

24. Miami Dolphins (via Houston Texans): Andrew Thomas, OT, Georgia

The Dolphins really have the ammunition to do what they want in this draft. If they see a player they covet, they’d be smart to get him. Thomas has experience at both tackle spots and acquainted himself well on the left side the last two seasons.

25. Minnesota Vikings: Josh Jones, OT, Houston

Thomas and Jones both fell a little bit in this week’s mock draft, but never forget that no one really knows what’s going to happen on draft night. If Jones slides, the Vikings can stop his free fall at No. 25 and Riley Reiff can finally be moved off the left tackle spot.

26. New Orleans Saints: CJ Henderson, CB, Florida

A trade for the Saints is the ideal because they have no second-round picks this year. If they miss out on Love and Eason, they could wait another year on a quarterback prospect. Instead, they could turn to the back part of the defense, where the team sorely lacks outside cornerbacks besides Marcus Lattimore. Sure, Janoris Jenkins is there, but he could be a money-saving cut.

TRADE: Kansas City sends pick Nos. 32 and 63 to Seattle for pick No. 27

27. Kansas City Chiefs (via Seattle Seahawks): Patrick Queen, LB, LSU

This trade was just as much about Seattle’s penchant for making deals than anything else. The Chiefs might want to move up to snag Queen before the Packers take him. Queen is a player I think will get hot leading up to the draft, and the Chiefs badly need linebacker help. The team’s other big need — running back — can be found at any point.

28. Baltimore Ravens: Terrell Lewis, Edge, Alabama

As a hybrid pass rusher, Lewis is the perfect fit for Baltimore. Lewis is a long and fast pass rusher who could replace Matt Judon if he leaves in free agency.

29. Tennessee Titans: Austin Jackson, OT, USC

The Titans didn’t pick up Jack Conklin’s fifth-year option, so that should tell you what they think of the 2016 first-round pick. On a team that prioritizes the run, it’s imperative Tennessee’s line remains strong. Jackson’s background is at left tackle, but he’s too good to pass up at No. 29.

30. Green Bay Packers: Justin Jefferson, WR, LSU

Imagine forcing Aaron Rodgers to perform in the twilight of his career throwing to the likes of Jake Kumerow, Allen Lazard, Equanimeous St. Brown, and Marquez Valdes-Scantling. Get Rodgers a real receiver before it’s too late.

31. San Francisco 49ers: Jeff Gladney, CB, TCU

If Gladney does well for himself at the combine, he’s a player who could jump into the back part of the first round. Ahkello Witherspoon had a rocky third season, and the 49ers could look to bolster their talent in the secondary.

32. Seattle Seahawks: Zack Baun, LB, Wisconsin

Baun isn’t a traditional edge rusher, but that didn’t stop him in 2019. He finished the season with 12.5 sacks and 19.5 tackles for loss for Wisconsin, and his skill set as a speed linebacker standing up translates to the NFL.

[northgeorgiasportsman]

21 Things To Do in Dallas This Week

Justin Timberlake is returning to the AAC on Thursday night. email Print Article

AA

Wednesday

Need a ladies night? Or a men’s night? Or just a night to get totally wasted and scream and holler when you see men taking off their clothes? Chippendales is coming to town just in time for bachelorette party season. Or a way to unwind after the stress of the holidays? Or it’s cold outside and you miss the sight of shirtless men? Whatever floats your boat or makes you hoot and holler, see it all (well, mostly all) at 8 p.m. Wednesday at House of Blues, 2200 N. Lamar St. Tickets start at $25 at livenation.com. Paige Skinner

Thursday

Rover Dramawerks picked Muriel Resnik’s Any Wednesday for its 19th season opener, which you can catch at 8 p.m. Thursday and Friday, and at 3 p.m. and 8 p.m. Saturday at 221 W. Parker Road, Suite 580, Plano. Playgoers 55 years ago (any readers still around?) may remember the play on Broadway with Sandy Dennis and Gene Hackman. Jane Fonda starred in the movie. Familiar plot: Married business tycoon visits mistress in office-paid-for apartment every Wednesday. Complications ensue when client and tycoon’s wife mistakenly get sent to the apartment. Carol M. Rice directs Mark Massey, Jade Reyes, Eddy Herring and Lucia Welch. For info and tickets, roverdramawerks.com or 972-849-0358. Thursday and matinee tickets are $18; others are $24; teacher/student/senior, $20. Reba Liner

It’s been about eight months or so since Justin Timberlake appeared in town, gracing the same American Airlines Center stage that he will again command Thursday night. Such is the magnitude of his star power. After all, there are very few artists who could return to the same scope and size of venue in such a short time. On that last appearance, JT took the sold-out crowd on a journey through his vast solo catalog of hits, enthralling the audience with his slinky dance moves, buttery smooth falsettos and charmingly, magnetic charisma. His shows also skew heavily toward the mom demographic. Much chardonnay will be sold and much is likely to be spilled as the gaggle of 30- and 40-something ladies will undoubtedly raise their glasses high in the air as they swoon and sway to his every move and note. If you’re there, feel free to join in. If you’re not in attendance, your social media feeds will keep you updated minute by minute. 8 p.m. Thursday, American Airlines Center, 2500 Victory Ave., $49 and up at ticketmaster.com. Jeff Strowe

Toro y Moi, along with Neon Indian and Washed Out, was a forerunner of the chill wave movement about a decade ago. But, like many in the scene at that time, he’s moved on from the sound, as is evident in his new album, this year’s Outer Peace. One critic described the album as "new disco," while others label it as a funk album rooted in the present. 7 p.m. Thursday, Granada Theater, 3524 Greenville Ave., sold out. Diamond Victoria

Friday

Ella is a girl with a dopey fairy godmother who “blesses” Ella with obedience, which means whatever anyone tells her to do, she does. Even worse, she ends up with a stepmother and stepsisters who know about her quirk and are happy to take advantage. Throw in a handsome prince and adventures with ogres and magic, and you have a twisty retelling of Cinderella. See a song-filled version of Gail Carson Levine’s Newbery-honored fractured fairy tale as the Dallas Children’s Theater stages Ella Enchanted: The Musical at 5938 Skillman St. Friday’s performance is at 7:30 p.m., and the show runs through Feb. 24. Tickets, $15-40, can be found at dct.org. Patrick Williams

Did you know that comedian Iliza Shlesinger got her start here in Dallas? You didn’t? How dare you call yourself a resident! Shlesinger was born in New York, but she grew up in Dallas and took her first steps onstage as an improv comedian before heading off to college and a lucrative stand-up comedy career. She returns to her homeland for a show at The Majestic Theatre, 1925 Elm St., at 7 p.m. Friday. Shlesinger cut her teeth in stand-up at The Hollywood Improv and quickly caught on with her unique take and skill. She found fame as the first female comedian to win the NBC reality competition Last Comic Standing and began regularly touring theaters across the country and the world. Tickets are between $32 and $209 depending on available seating and can be purchased at theatredallas.com. Danny Gallagher

There is a story behind Amaluna, the Cirque du Soleil show making a stop at Lone Star Park in Grand Prairie, 1000 Lone Star Parkway. Here goes: Queen Prospera rules over a magical island populated by all women until a group of men wash ashore shipwrecked. Her daughter … OK, look. It’s Cirque du Soleil. You know, lots of brightly colored leotards and amazing acrobats dangling from straps above the audience, flying through the air launched from seesaws to the sound of mildly weird new-agey music. There are two shows Friday, at 4:30 and 8 p.m. Adult ticket prices start at $63, with discounts for children, and an assortment of special packages are available at cirquedusoleil.com. The circus continues with shows until March 3. Patrick Williams

As do many institutions at their silver anniversary, sports-talk station KTCK-AM 1310 and 96.7 FM “The Ticket” is getting nostalgic for the 25th iteration of its signature P1 fan festival. Along with celebrity guests Troy Aikman, Jay Novacek and Daryl “Razor” Reaugh, Ticketstock 25 has a Ticket Time Tunnel, where Tier One hosts discuss the history of the station in panel discussions, and there’s an interactive Ticket Hall of Fame with memorabilia, audio, Marconi Awards and retro Ticket merch. As usual, the Timewasters will perform Saturday at 6 p.m., this year from a greatest-hits set list, with Fox 4 sports anchor Mike Doocy — the ultimate good sport and straight guy during his frequent guest-hosting appearances — as emcee. Ticketstock 25 is Friday and Saturday at the Plano Event Center, 2000 E. Spring Creek Parkway. Doors open at noon both days and admission is free. Visit theticket.com for the full schedule of on-air roundtables and gotta-be-there-to-hear-’em Ticket Time Tunnel panels. Jesse Hughey

In the sage words of the world’s pre-eminent British girl band: spice up your life. Winter doldrums be damned, things are getting hot at ZestFest Jan. 25-27 at the Irving Convention Center, 500 W. Las Colinas Blvd. This three-day celebration of all things bold and piquant is packed with cooking demonstrations; celebrity chefs like Jon Bonnell, Eddie Deen and MasterChef champ Shaun O’Neale; gourmet vendors to help you level up in your own kitchen; live music; plus food samples and beer tastings aplenty. For those of us with stomachs of steel and something to prove, there’s a jalapeño-eating challenge and the annual “Atomic Wing” contest. Pack your antacid and plan a full day on Friday from 1 to 6 p.m., Saturday from 10 a.m. until 6 p.m., and Sunday from 10 a.m. until 5 p.m. Admission is $15 at the door, though kids 10 and under get in free. For more info, check out zestfest.net. Jennifer Davis-Lamm

Creator and headliner of last year’s inaugural I Am Dallas Hip Hop event, Mozez Tha Great performs his long-awaited EP Undefined in its entirety as part of a stacked bill at The Prophet Bar on Friday night. Mozez has gone through his fair share of setbacks over the years regarding his music career. A few years ago, Undefined was ready for release, but when an engineer who was commissioned to mix and master the album took off with Mozez’s money, its completion got delayed. Catch Mozez along with several other of Dallas’ best up-and-coming hip-hop artists. With Lou Charle$, Mokah Soulfly, Smoothvega, Drama Tha King and Raw Elementz, 8:30 p.m. Friday, The Prophet Bar, 2548 Elm St., $10. Diamond Victoria

Thursday is on a small run of dates where they play two of their classic LPs, Full Collapse and War All the Time, front to back. Though they have a rather extensive back catalog, these are the two records that changed their fortunes and gained a huge audience. The first night — Friday night — is devoted to Full Collapse, the record that broke the band out of the New Jersey scene and into the national spotlight. The next night is devoted to War All the Time, the major-label debut that brought the band to larger acclaim. Normally shows like these happen in New York, LA or Chicago, so Dallas is very lucky to have these dates. Thursday is not really an active band as compared with the 2000s, so you should strongly consider going if you’ve never seen this powerful and legendary band before. 8:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday, Jan. 25-26 at Trees, 2709 Elm St., $29-$36 at ticketfly.com. Eric Grubbs

Saturday

Sport is “an activity involving physical exertion and skill in which an individual or team competes against another or others for entertainment,” according to the Google search we just did. By that definition, cheerleading is 100 percent, no doubt in anyone’s mind, a sport. Backflips are physical. Somersaults must be learned and perfected. And competitive cheerleaders, well, compete. See them do that Saturday and Sunday, Jan. 26-27 at Kay Bailey Hutchison Convention Center Dallas, 650 S. Griffin St at National Cheerleaders Association National Championships. Tickets start at $20 at eventbrite.com. Paige Skinner

Finnish vocal ensemble Rajaton joins the Dallas Symphony Orchestra to celebrate the music of megastar pop group Abba, who are enjoying a much deserved critical reconsideration. Expect orchestral renditions that shine new light on the Swedish artists’ soaring, emotionally raw classics, including “Mamma Mia,” “Waterloo,” “Dancing Queen” and more. There are three performances: at 7:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday, Jan. 25-26, and 2:30 p.m. Sunday, Jan. 27. All performances take place at the Meyerson, 2301 Flora St. Tickets start at $20. More info at mydso.com. Jonathan Patrick

The Boy Who Would Be Captain Hook is a funny and moving play about a boy who was born without a right hand. When doctors fitted him with a prosthetic hook, he was sidelined at recess until the other kids asked to play Peter Pan with him. Of course, he played Captain Hook — until he grew tired of it. The Boy Who Would Be Captain Hook takes a look at David Harrell’s childhood living with a disability as he tells the story of how he wished to change his own narrative and not be just the boy with a hook. The play is at 3 p.m. Saturday at Charles W. Eisemann Center, 2351 Performance Drive, Richardson. Visit eisemanncenter.com for more information and tickets ($25). Paige Skinner

KNON is the nonprofit, listener-supported community radio station that has been showcasing the blues in DFW for 20 years. From the up-and-coming, 11-year-old Jack Barksdale to headliners like the award-winning blues elders in Gregg A. Smith and the Blues Revue Band, the 20th annual KNON Blues Festival will be two days packed with Texas talent. Before hosting festivals, KNON released compilations of blues music from all over DFW. The radio station has brought blues a long way over the years and shows no sign of stopping. The festival will be held at Poor David’s Pub, where blues has been put on display in Dallas for over 40 years. Keeping up with what is seemingly a festival tradition, Dickey’s Barbecue will be available for $10 a plate. 3 p.m. Saturday and Sunday, Jan. 26-27 at Poor David’s Pub, 1313 Lamar St., $20-$150 at eventbrite.com. Jacob Vaughn

Blake Ward is one of the busiest DJs in Dallas, with four different weekly events and recently having taken up the management of his new Four Four Booking agency. He has a long-standing Saturday night Glamorama gig at Beauty Bar. As far as promotion goes, Ward is relentless, a perfect example of how to connect, inform and grow a DJ audience. 9 p.m. Saturday, Beauty Bar, 1924 N. Henderson Ave., free. Wanz Dover

Sunday

International Holocaust Remembrance Day marks the anniversary of the liberation of the Nazi extermination camp at Auschwitz-Birkenau. Name doesn’t ring a bell? Then mark the day with a visit to the Dallas Holocaust Museum and Center for Education and Tolerance, 211 N. Record St., Suite 100. Remember, those who forget the past are … well, just doomed. The museum is open 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. Sunday, and admission is $10 for adults, with discounts for kids and seniors. Find more information at dallasholocaustmuseum.org. Patrick Williams

Monday

Who doesn’t love The Bachelor? You? OK, no one asked you. Jeez. Well somebody loves it, because the entire franchise has spanned more than 40 seasons and people keep watching. This season, four Dallas women are vying for virgin Colton Underwood’s love and cherry as America watches. If you don’t have anyone to watch it and cringe over it with, then head to Steam Theory Brewing Co., 340 Singleton Blvd., Suite 100, at 7 p.m. Monday, Jan. 28, to bond with fellow Bachelor lovers at the Bachelor Nation Watching Party. Visit steamtheorybrewing.com for more information. Paige Skinner

Tuesday

Namo in West Village, 3699 McKinney Ave., is hosting a sake-tasting class from 6:30 p.m. until 8:30 p.m. Tuesday. Those attending will get six hand rolls matched with sakes from TYKU Sake, whose reps will be on hand to tell you what to look for in the traditional Japanese wine made from rice, water, yeast and koji (a kind of mold used in Japanese cuisine). Tickets are $50 at eventbrite.com. Patrick Williams

Wednesday

The Disney empire is a vast, all-encompassing thing. They’re the masters of the Ice Capades, one of the biggest names in Broadway and have a virtual lock on the kids pajama market. Now, their reach expands to the world of a cappella singing. Yep, the domain once reserved for Ivy League a-holes in striped jackets is now replete with mouse ears: meet DCappella, Disney Music’s a cappella super group. Assembled by Deke Sharon, who’s like the Lou Pearlman of the a cappella world, these seven men and women don’t need backing instruments. It’s just their sweet, sweet voices and sculpted eyebrows up onstage, belting out all your favorite Disney tunes at Verizon Theatre at Grand Prairie, 1001 Performance Place, at 7 p.m. Wednesday, Jan. 30. Tickets to see the Disney-fied vocal acrobatics are $19.50 to $54.50 at axs.com. Jennifer Davis-Lamm

In Incognito, playwright Nick Payne tells three different stories to better explore the human mind. One is about Thomas Stoltz Harvey stealing the recently dead Albert Einstein’s brain. The other is about a man named Harvey undergoing brain surgery, and the third is about Martha, a clinical neuropsychologist making some changes in her life after her marriage falls apart. See the play Jan. 30 through Feb. 23 at Bryant Hall, 3636 Turtle Creek Blvd. Tickets start $25 at secondthoughttheatre.com. Showtime is 7:30 p.m. Wednesday. Paige Skinner

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Why Men and women Like to Detest v bucks fortnite codes

How Fortnite Captured Teens’ Hearts and Minds

The trend for that third-human being shooter recreation has factors of Beatlemania, the opioid crisis, and eating Tide Pods.

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It had been acquiring late in Tomato City. The storm was closing in, and meteors pelted the ground. Gizzard Lizard experienced designed his way there right after plundering the sparsely populated barns and domiciles of Anarchy Acres, then by keeping away from the Wailing Woods and maintaining the storm just off to his remaining. He spied an enemy combatant on superior ground, who appeared to possess a sniper’s rifle. Inside of a hollow down below the sniper’s perch was an deserted pizzeria, with an enormous rotating check in The form of a tomato. Gizzard Lizard, who experienced speedily crafted himself a redoubt of salvaged beams, said, “I believe I’m planning to attack. That’s amongst my main troubles: I need to begin becoming much more aggressive.” He ran out into the open up, pausing just before a thick shrub. “This is really a very excellent bush. I could bush-camp. But naw, that’s what noobs do.”

Two Adult males enter, just one man leaves: the fighters shut in on one another. From the video match Fortnite Struggle Royale, the late-activity period is typically one of the most frenetic and remarkable. Instantly, the sniper introduced himself into a close-by subject and commenced attacking. Gizzard Lizard unexpectedly threw up One more port-a-fort, amid a hail of enemy hearth. The target is usually to acquire, or make, the superior floor.

A second afterwards, Gizzard Lizard was useless—killed by a grenade. Afterward, he replayed the ending, from various vantages, to analyze what had absent Erroneous. Being so near successful and still appear up brief—it was irritating and tantalizing. One particular really wants to go once more. The urge is powerful. But it was time for my son to perform his research.

I spent far more time as A child than I treatment to recall viewing other kids Engage in video online games. Area Invaders, Asteroids, Pac-Gentleman, Donkey Kong. Commonly, my buddies, about my objections, desired this to actively playing ball—or to other preferred, if much less edifying, neighborhood pursuits, which include tearing hood ornaments off parked vehicles. Every so normally, I played, as well, but I used to be a spaz. Insert quarter, game over. As soon as gaming moved into dorms and apartments—Nintendo, Sega—I discovered that I could just go away. But occasionally I didn’t. I admired the feat of divided consideration, the knack that some men (and it had been constantly fellas) appeared to have for being alive, both in the game and during the fight of wits to the sofa, as though they ended up each enjoying a Activity and accomplishing “SportsCenter” simultaneously.

I considered this one other working day when a friend explained observing a group of eighth-quality girls and boys (among the them his son) hanging close to his condominium actively playing, but largely seeing Other people play, Fortnite. 1 boy was playing on a considerable Television monitor, which has a PlayStation 4 console. Another boys have been on their own phones, either actively playing or seeing an experienced gamer’s Reside stream. And the girls have been enjoying or looking at on their own telephones, or seeking above the shoulders with the boys. One of several women advised my Pal, “It’s enjoyment to see the boys get mad after they drop.” Nobody stated Considerably. What patter there was—l’esprit du divan—came from the kids’ minimal screens, in the shape of the pro gamer’s mordant narration as he vanquished his opponents.

Fortnite, for any person not a teen-ager or simply a guardian or educator of teenagers, could be the third-human being shooter match which has taken around the hearts and minds—and the time, the two discretionary and normally—of adolescent and collegiate The united states. Unveiled final September, it really is at this time by a lot of actions the preferred movie match on the globe. From time to time, there are already a lot more than a few million people playing it directly. It's been downloaded an approximated sixty million periods. (The sport, obtainable on Laptop, Mac, Xbox, PS4, and mobile equipment, is—crucially—free, but a lot of gamers pay out for additional, cosmetic features, like costumes often known as “skins.”) With regard to fervor, compulsive actions, and parental noncomprehension, the Fortnite fad has things of Beatlemania, the opioid crisis, as well as ingestion of Tide Pods. Dad and mom converse of it as an dependancy and swap tales of plunging grades and brazen monitor-time abuse: under the desk in school, in a memorial support, in the toilet at 4 A.M. They beg one another for methods. An acquaintance despatched me a video clip he’d taken one particular afternoon whilst attempting to cease his son from participating in; there was a time when repeatedly calling 1’s father a fucking asshole might have triggered big hassle in Tomato Town. In our home, the big threat is gamer rehab in South Korea.

Match fads come and go: Rubik’s Dice, Dungeons & Dragons, Angry Birds, Minecraft, Clash of Clans, Pokémon Go. What people today appear to concur on, whether or not they’re seasoned avid gamers or dorky dads, is there’s a little something new emerging all-around Fortnite, a type of mass social accumulating, open up into a A lot wider array of individuals when compared to the game titles that arrived ahead of. Its relative lack of wickedness—it seems to be typically free of the misogyny and racism that afflict all kinds of other online games and gaming communities—makes it much more palatable to a broader audience, and this attractiveness both ameliorates and augments its addictive power. (The sport, in its essential method, randomly assigns gamers’ skins, which can be of any gender or race.) Common anecdotal evidence suggests that ladies are enjoying in huge numbers, equally with and without the need of boys. You will discover, and possibly ever shall be, some gamer geeks who gripe at these newcomers, equally as they gripe when http://raissv.com/ there aren't any newcomers at all.

A colleague whose thirteen-12 months-aged son is deep down the rabbit gap likened the Fortnite phenomenon towards the Pump Household Gang, the crew of ne’er-do-perfectly teenager surfers in La Jolla whom Tom Wolfe happened upon while in the early nineteen-sixties. As opposed to a clubhouse about the Seashore, there’s a Digital global juvenile corridor, where by Youngsters Acquire, invent an argot, undertake alter egos, and shoot each other down. Wolfe’s Pump Property kids went on beer-soaked outings they known as “destructos,” during which they'd, at area farmers’ behest, demolish abandoned barns. Now it’s Juul-sneaking minimal homebodies demolishing Digital partitions and residences with imaginary pickaxes. Adolescents everywhere you go are swinging away at their globe, tearing it down to survive—Imaginative destruction, of A sort.

Shall I demonstrate the game? I need to, I’m concerned, Although describing video clip video games is somewhat like recounting dreams. A hundred gamers are dropped on to an island—from a flying school bus—and struggle one another to your Dying. The winner is the last 1 standing. (You may pair up or sort a squad, too.) This is certainly what is meant by Struggle Royale. (The original version of Fortnite, released final July, for forty bucks, wasn’t fight for the Demise; it's the new iteration which has caught fireplace.) A storm encroaches, step by step forcing combatants into an at any time-shrinking area, where by they need to destroy or be killed. Along just how, you find out caches of weapons, armor, and healables, even though also gathering building elements by breaking down current constructions. Hasty fabrication (of ramps, forts, and towers) is an essential aspect of the game, which is why it is commonly called a cross involving Minecraft along with the Hunger Online games—and why aggrieved mothers and fathers can easily inform them selves that it's constructive.

In advance of a game begins, you wander close to inside of a kind of purgatorial bus depot-cum-airfield waiting until finally the next hundred have assembled for an airdrop. This can be a strange position. Gamers shoot inconsequentially at one another and pull dance moves, like actors strolling aimlessly around backstage practicing their strains. Then come the airlift and the drifting descent, by way of glider, towards the battleground, with a gentle whooshing audio that is towards the Fortnite addict exactly what the flick of the Bic would be to a smoker. You'll be able to land in a single of 20-one regions to the island, Each and every that has a cutesy alliterative name, some suggestive of mid-century gay bars: Shifty Shafts, Moisty Mire, Lonely Lodge, Greasy Grove. In patois As well as in mood, the sport manages to get both dystopian and comedian, dark and light. It might be alarming, should you’re not accustomed to these kinds of factors or are attuned to the information, to hear your darlings shouting so merrily about head photographs and snipes. But there’s no blood or gore. The violence is cartoonish, at the least relative to, say, Halo or Grand Theft Automobile. These types of tend to be the consolations.

The island itself has an air of desertion although not of maximum despair. This apocalypse is rated PG. The abandonment, precipitated from the storm, which has possibly killed or scattered many of the world’s inhabitants, seems to have already been current and relatively fast. The grass is lush, the canopy entire. The hydrangeas are abloom in Snobby Shores. Buildings are unencumbered by kudzu or graffiti and possess tidy, sparsely furnished rooms, as though the inhabitants experienced only just fled (or been vaporized). Evidently, everyone around the island, in Those people prosperous pre-storm instances, shopped in the exact same aisle at Goal. Every time I enjoy a player enter a bedroom, be it in Junk Junction or Loot Lake, I Notice the multicolored blanket folded across the mattress. Those people cobalt-blue desk lamps: are they available for sale? Possibly at some point They are going to be.

[popmitzvah]

Now I Am Become Slut, Destroyer of Worlds

The host is alive. She is sentient. She is self-aware. And she knows you have programmed her to attack herself and the others.

Nope! Not a blog about Westworld! At least, most of it isn’t. I want to talk about The Bachelor and I want to explain why this show is the place to be, if you’re into the shock of watching creations outsmart their creator-controllers.  The more I read this Bach season as a rumination on feeling fictional and clawing for “reality,” the more I was reminded of HBO’s ambitious series on gnosticism, humanity, and the function of storytelling. Might even go so far to say that these two shows share a soul; Dolores Abernathy would be right at home at a rose ceremony!

Please follow me, down into a fake mansion that houses a harem, where we can take a closer look at the things that made The Bachelor so distinctive in its 21st season: existential female anxiety, textual reflexivity, and the peculiar journey of Corinne, a single trope that managed to awaken and rewrite herself.

Born into an apocalyptic Trumpworld, this iteration of The Bachelor became something kind of dark, dreadful, and a little bit out-of-control. Of course, The Bachelor is always a circus, and that’s why so many people hate it: for a television fan, it takes a strong set of stones to follow something so vapid, so dependent on tired stereotypes and romantic wish-fulfillment, so misogynistic, so corporate and disingenuous. How many different ways can producers arrange 30 beautiful women in a Love Thunderdome as they compete for the affections of one bland white man? But there was something poisonous in American culture at large that made Season 21 into something else, something crazier. Perhaps the 2016 election left a vacuum of hope that encouraged The Bachelor producers to lean into self-destruction as an aesthetic. Perhaps we, the audience, are evolving to watch ourselves watching TV, and we prefer everything to be kind of about storytelling – ergo the timely popularity of diverse “meta” shows like Westworld, American Horror Story, Fleabag.

Either way, the new Bachelor was defined by these new and distinctive notes:

Contestants who bristled inside their assigned story cages and pointedly drew attention to the process of being written as characters.

The season’s primary “villain,” Corinne, who transcended the confines of the Bach with a Joker-like sense of chaotic sexuality and stunningly re-branded her arc as sex-positive feminist heroism.

An unwilling Bachelor whose weird charisma relied on his apathy, nihilism, and constant critique of the format. Nick undermined our reception of the Bachelor experience by positioning himself as a bored observer – distancing himself from the contestants and the ideological underpinnings of the show.

First, I want to take on Bullet Number One – the Westworldian crises of self that entered this season of the Bachelor early on and began the process of destabilizing narratives and the women forced to live them. Take a look at what happened to Jasmine G on Night 1. Now, it’s not unusual for Bachelor women to immediately recoil from the uncanniness of this environment –  to be a Bachelor contestant, to be on a reality dating competition, is to be subjected to spirit-breaking. These women are tested every moment with the pressures of self-criticism, of being filmed, of being beautiful, of being charming, of systematically attacking and defeating your stunning competitors. But something about Jasmine G’s body language and wording struck me as a crisis of self, a dissociative episode which bespeaks her sudden awareness that she is performing and this whole thing – maybe any love-hunt – is theater without meaning.

“It doesn’t matter. It’s out of my control. There’s nothing I can do. Holy shit. Who the fuck am I? I’m blown away right now. Who am I?”

Night 1 would be the first of Jasmine’s many system failures, glitches in her personality and physical affect which provided an alarming counterpoint to the self-policing composure we’re used to seeing on these women. Nick eliminated her because of her unpleasant urge to question the “realism” of herself, of him, of the experience. And this was not the only instance of unusual meta-awareness amongst the women. Many of the others expressed a certain repugnance at the roles in which they were pigeonholed – at their status as storylines. Liz’s only mission, with mounting desperation, was to rewrite her way from Nick’s opportunistic ex-fling all the way to romantic legitimacy. Taylor realized too late that her Bachelor persona and “real” professional life were being mapped onto one another and she’d dug herself into the “bitch bully” hole (with the help of her nemesis Corinne). Taylor also literally theorized that some women are better-programmed for love! What could be more Westworld than attempting to parse the resident slut’s “emotional intelligence”?

So there was a significant change in the show here, in which the women’s grasp or ignorance of “being produced” was of paramount importance to how we perceived them. To compare these women to WW characters like Dolores and Maeve – remaining basic, guileless, and easily overwritten ensured a measure of success in the competition and preserved their classic Bachelor likeability factor.

So with that said, I’m dying to get back to Corinne. Here was a contestant who really jumped off the screen for reasons I’ve never seen an antagonist “pop” before. Unlike a villain such as, say, Season 20’s Olivia, Corinne worked to distinguish herself as a breakout character – not just through behavior but through actual world-building. Starting the show out by mentioning her current nanny Raquel was a stroke of genius; Raquel was a framing device that indicated Corinne inhabited a bizarre fantasy world inside and outside the show. In so many ways. Corinne deliberately ate endless blocks of cheese on camera. She feigned naps, eyes closed, smiling beatifically as she “dreamed” of Nick. She self-consciously and joyfully delivered dialogue she knew would light up the internet. Clutching her breasts and huffing, “Does this seem like someone who’s immature?” Staring soullessly into the lens and intoning, “My heart is gold, but my vagine is platinum.” Luring Nick into an inexplicable bounce house and toplessly dry-humping him with abandon. Corinne’s promiscuity, and her persona, were over-the-top but deliberately, defiantly, and delightfully self-choreographed. We know the floozy never wins, but when the floozy knows it, ignores it, and enjoys her role, she transcends happy endings.

And most interestingly, Corinne elevated her self-awareness and self-programming into a magnificent final act. During “The Women Tell All” (a reunion episode which airs before the finale) Corinne, in one fell swoop, ret-conned her entire Bachelor journey as a feminist rumspringa. “I was just doing me,” she demurely insisted, while the other contestants fought to defend her sexual agency. They leaped to defend the resident slut as the bravest and most authentic person amongst them. Corinne sat, resplendent, her eyes bearing no trace of the mischief and malevolence that had been her character cornerstones. She’d accomplished a rewrite akin to “it was all a dream.” Later, women sobbed while Liz declared her sexual encounter with Nick had not “defined” her, and they took turns praising their sister for her humanitarian work. The thematic tide-turn from “a search for true love” to “an inner journey toward female unity and empowerment” made for the most overtly political and topical episode The Bachelor has had, maybe ever – and it bespoke the malleability of reality fiction in a way the show has never previously approached.

In many ways, it was Bachelor Nick’s abdication of his role that allowed the TV text to refocus itself on the women “waking up” and growing through their relationships to one another. It’s hard, as a viewer, to engage with story about passive female players being driven toward romantic fulfillment, when the end-goal is a guy who’d be content to go home immediately and eat cold pizza. As we know, the guy had already been through two seasons of The Bachelorette and one summer of Bachelor in Paradise – his entire narrative was “last-ditch effort for love.” Nick made it his business to call out the fakery of The Bachelor, and the futility of it: “Let’s try to be as normal as possible in an abnormal environment.” “I’ve been in their shoes, and I know how much it sucks.” I certainly like Nick as a person – I like that he cries when he feels stuff, and I like that he hates being The Bachelor but loves being famous, and I like that he let women who were too good for him go, so they could fly and be free and be the first black Bachelorette. But if Nick did anything other than represent a neat resolution of the presented Bachelor narrative, he effectively denied our suspension of disbelief and exposed this particular season as “reality farce with no point.” Prince Charming was just in it for the international travel and the free food. I sympathize. And it’s fun to watch The Bachelor pretend that this isn’t a huge problem.

SO! I posit here that, at least for this season, The Bachelor evolved beyond the story of single women and their search for love. You might say that instead of being about singlehood, this show became about “the singularity” – that moment when program/character/trope/story/world comes alive and begins to adapt and change itself. I wonder: is it a better ride for the reality-consuming audience, when “we know they know”? At what point does watching a character with meta-awareness become confusing, or tiresome, rather than thrilling? And most importantly, what are the differences between watching reality television and prestige drama when we’re grappling with these issues? This question, perhaps, is of paramount importance for TV fans as we go forward; if there’s something in the water that’s poisoning every genre of narrative experience (or making it tastier), we have to put our fingers on it. Why do I watch so much television about women in traps, whose self-actualization and creative escapes are catalyzed by patriarchal violence? Why is it so easy to find that story?

I think it’s easy to brush aside shows like The Bachelor precisely because they are so heavily consumed, across political and cultural lines, and “mass appeal” television has the reputation of reifying harmful structures of power. For really good reason. But it’s important to locate these small moments of medium-transcendence within these TV texts. More and more, the characters we use and abuse are turning directly towards us. These fictional delights have real ends, and it’s never, never about the final rose.

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A Solo Traveler’s Guide on How to Meet People While Traveling

Photo by Oskar Krawczyk via Unsplash.

Traveling alone has its perks: You get to do what you want, when you want, discover new and honest things about the world and yourself, and enjoy an uplifting, mindful traveling experience without someone else’s influences. But after a while, talking to yourself and eating another meal without being able to share funny thoughts and observations about the day with an another human get... awfully lonesome.

This post originally appeared on FY!S.

In late 2015, I embarked on a solo trip to Asia that lasted nine months. At first, the idea of going at it alone filled me with excitement and trepidation. No one could deny me from catching Pokémon at parks, seeing how many plates of kaiten sushi I can put away by myself, and going on day excursions on a whim. On the flip side, solo travel has its limitations. I couldn’t exactly eat what I wanted because the portions were too big, or I was too self-conscious about wandering into a family restaurant by myself. Or, I couldn’t go to certain places because I didn’t feel safe. It didn’t take long before I realized that many of my experiences while traveling, while fun solo, could be way more gratifying when they could be shared with a companion or two.

To combat the loneliness of solo travel, I simply started putting myself in (safe) situations that let me meet people while traveling. I’ve had the pleasure of meeting and hanging out with many, many friends–old and new–all over the world by using a variety of resources. Some I knew beforehand, but many more I met while I was on the road. I still talk to a lot of them on the reg. Here’s what I know.

To Meet People, You Need to Get Over Talking to Strangers

Before we get to the actual tactics of how to meet people while traveling, I recognize that your comfort level with talking to complete strangers is probably different from mine. Many of the things I’m about to discuss wouldn’t fly so easily if you’re shy, and that’s fine. Shyness is not a bad thing, but wanting to meet people while traveling is actually the perfect opportunity for you to build the courage to speak to more and more strangers.

My friends and I at Mt. Baldy in Southern California.

It’s scary, but take solace in the fact that if you go out on a limb and fall flat on your face, no one knew or cared about you to begin with, so what do you really have to lose?

If anything, you’d gain a little spunk. It’s easy to imagine all the ways that you’ll get burned, but if you reach out as a traveler, most people—locals or fellow travelers—reach right back as long as you’re genuine and transparent. And if they don’t, it’s not you who sucks anyway. Still, talking to strangers is one thing, but be okay with the fact that not every person you meet is going to be your Best Facebook Friend Forever.

You will be forced to talk to a lot of strangers. But the worst that can happen is you get ignored or encounter some rudeness, but that’s everyone, anywhere, and honestly, the person isn’t going to remember you in a couple of hours.

Five Ways to Make Conversations Easier

When it comes down to it, starting any conversation that doesn’t begin and die with “Wow, some weather today, huh?” is a skill. You wouldn’t know it when you meet me, but I am a pretty big introvert. I’ve bumbled through awkward encounters. I’ve often struggled to initiate or restart conversations. But I got better at it. I also made it a rule to have conversations that didn’t center around, “So what do you do?” as an extra challenge and also because I despised the question. In the end, I came up with a few things that you could do to let conversations flow more easily.

1. Actually Be a Tourist

There’s no shame in being a tourist. Embrace your rose-colored lenses and sense of uncertainty and wide-eyed wonder (but skip the douchey behavior, obviously)! Along the same vein, Nomadic Matt points out that you should try joining local tours and groups. “For example, take a small group tour from a local. While on the tour, ask all of the questions you want about local life and what it’s like to grow up in that region (without being annoying).”

People treat tourists differently, in a good way but also sometimes in a bad way. I’ve found that people are usually willing to answer questions if you seem lost and appear non-threatening. Henrik Jeppesen, one of few amazing travelers who’s visited every country in the world, told me that he’d go up to strangers with: “‘Hi, can you recommend anything to see or do here?’ Not only have I met great people this way, but have also been offered a place to stay on nights where I had nowhere to go.”

On the flip side, be wary of people who approach you aggressively and seem too Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood friendly. You never know, they really could be that nice, but I’d probably bail to be on the safer side.

There’s no use pretending you’re not a tourist or newbie. Be curious and ask questions as a way to spur easy conversation.

2. Offer to Take a Picture

If you want to meet other travelers, you can park your butt at a popular tourist spot. You can rest easy knowing that 75 percent of the people there are fellow travelers, 20 percent are locals trying to sell or peddle something, and 5 percent might be thieves or people that are up to no good. That wasn’t a very scientific breakdown, but you get the gist.

Oftentimes you’ll spot a solo traveler like yourself trying to take a selfie. If you’re up for it, offer to help the person take a picture. From there, you can ask if they’re also traveling alone and if they’d be okay with you buddying up for a couple hours or a day. This has worked really well for me.

3. Make Your Interests Known

On my travel backpack sit a PaRappa the Rapper, a Gudetama keychain, and anime stuff that I swap out every so often. They’re easy to spot and broadcast my interest in cute, geeky things. I did this intentionally for people who recognized these characters. I mean, anyone who’s played PaRappa or adores the silliness of Gudetama can’t be all bad. There were a surprising number of occasions, in fact, where people weren’t shy about coming up to me to point out my good tastes. More importantly, they did the hard part of approaching me, so at this point, we had something to talk about.

It doesn’t have to be keychains. Maybe it’s a book you’re reading, a notebook you like to scribble or doodle in, or a sticker on a water bottle. Some of your belongings can be so bizarre that they will spark someone’s interest, so having these things visible often make a great ice breaker.

On the other hand, you can be the one to point out what you like. People like compliments if you make it about them. Don’t just say, “I like your shoes.” You can say something like, “Your shoes look great on you. Where did you buy them?” And that opens up the opportunity to say something about how you’re not from around the area and could use some advice and yadda yadda.

As a traveler, you more than likely have things that can be great conversation starters. Keep them visible when you want to attract attention, but of course, be smart about where you do this.

4. Make a “Wrong” Assumption

Not too long ago, I sat at a coffee shop in London and noticed this dude next to me typing away on his new Macbook with TouchBar. I said jokingly, “You must have a ton of dongles in your bag.” (Hey, it was a reach.) He immediately pointed out that he didn’t, but opined that it was a frustrating design flaw and warned me to wait for the next iteration. This led us to talking about Apple, technology, and the best fish ‘n’ chips in London (it’s Bailey’s).

Okay, so I went out on a limb and I had to have been somewhat observant and updated on technology, but the point is, people normally don’t like to tell you squat if it feels like you’re interrogating them. They do, however, love to correct you when you’re wrong (don’t we all?). I learned this from speaking coach Sharí Alexander.

So if you want to talk to someone or continue a conversation but you’re not sure what to say, try making a simple, innocent assumption, as long as it’s not deeply personal. Don’t worry if you’re wrong because if you are, they’ll gladly correct you and reveal more information about them, which leads to more things to talk about.

Next time try making an innocent assumption (e.g., “This place is the hands-down the best ramen in the city.”). If you’re wrong, you still start a good conversation.

5. Have Little “Gifts” to Give

Wherever you go, you’ll find cheap trinkets and doodads at souvenir shops. I always make sure to pick up a couple of interesting ones that aren’t lame magnets, keychains, or anything heavy. For example, in Japan, I picked up a handful of shrine charms. If there’s nothing interesting like that, I’d settle for a bag of M&Ms or something sweet that can be shared.

These come in handy for when I meet cool people and want to help make someone’s day more awesome. As Peter Shank (whom I learned the M&M tip from via Sol Orwell) points out, M&Ms are cheap and a great way to bring a smile to someone’s face, which can make you smile. Smiles all around, folks, so everybody wins.

Small tokens and gifts tend to make interactions more pleasant.

I don’t always use these “tricks.” It’s important to let conversations unravel organically and avoid overthinking things too much. If your interaction has to fizzle out and neither of you feels like talking about the weather again, then for crying out loud, don’t force it.

Hostels Are an Easy Way to Meet Travelers, But They’re Not for Everyone

Staying at hostels is an obvious way to save on travel funds and meet other travelers. They’re fine for solo travelers…at least temporarily. I actually chose to avoid hostels myself, only choosing to stop at one or two in the last year or so. I avoid hostels for the following reasons:

People tend to be too young: I’m not a crotchety “get off my lawn” sort of person, but in my experience, the hostel crowd gets too wild for me. I’m not interested in partying it up anymore. It’s fine occasionally, but I’d much rather spend my days not hungover and useless.

Lack of privacy gets old fast: If the party crowd is your thing, there’s still the issue of privacy, of which you really have none. So take that into account.

You can’t get much work done: This is probably the biggest disadvantage for me. As a freelancing nomad, I get emails or work done at odd hours of the day sometimes, so if I had to work when coffee shops were closed it’d be really inconvenient to find a suitable place for focused work.

Hostels are fine for up to a week-long stay, but eventually, you might get tired of the lack of privacy and hanging out with other travelers. Other travelers are cool people to meet, but the real travel experiences come from meeting and befriending locals. And that’s why I much prefer to stay at Airbnbs.

Hostels are great for meeting travelers, but would be difficult if you’re a remote worker, not in the party mood, or want privacy.

Your Airbnb Host Is Your “In” to More Locals

I’ve written a huge guide on to how to use Airbnb and ensure you pick a suitable Airbnb for long-term stays anywhere in the world. It’s convenient for long-term travelers like myself, but I also make it a point to stay with a host who also lives on-site and is a local.

Most hosts are friendly toward travelers, some go above and beyond, and others still might charge you if you want them to show you around. You should note these in the description and check out the host’s personality and reviews before you book an Airbnb.

Usually, I try to bring a small gift for my host upon meeting him or her as a “thanks for having me” sort of gift (yes, even though I’m paying). I’ve found this to be extremely helpful with warming them up to me a bit more. I seem less like a weirdo traveler, and there’s a greater chance that they invite me to do things with them. I also ask plenty of questions about what they like to do and eat, so after a couple of days of knowing them, it’s easier to throw out an invitation to do or eat something they like. Eventually, this leads to meeting their friends, too. Plus, a lot of the time I get to meet the other Airbnb guests (if the host rents out multiple rooms).

I will note that not all my Airbnb host friendships have panned out the way I mentioned, but if the chemistry is right they are definitely a fantastic way to see, eat, and do local things, as well as meet other locals. Similar services like Couchsurfing and BeWelcome can also connect you with other local hosts.

I usually stay with Airbnb hosts who are locals and love to make friends with them to learn more about the city. Oftentimes, this leads to me meeting their friends and more locals.

Your Social Network Is Very Powerful, So Use It

I’m active on social media, so I usually let the Interwebs know where I am or traveling to. Before I go anywhere, I might tell Facebook where I’m headed and add, “Who’s a cool friend of yours that you think I should know?!” This results in a fair number of connections with friends of friends, who are often open to hanging out and sometimes becoming my own good friends.

Kanpai with my good friend, Justin!

Then there’s Twitter and Instagram. I’ve been lucky to have a healthy following that isn’t afraid to tweet back at me or message me on Facebook or Instagram to let me know what they think I should do or see. I appreciate these tips. There have even been instances where people reach out and ask to meet up. I’ve obliged with almost every request.

Of course, I’m always concerned the person is actually a psycho, so I make it a point to meet in public places during the daytime. So far they’ve all been wonderful people, but still gotta be smart and safe.

If you don’t have a following, that’s okay. You can use social media to follow your favorite people or search certain hashtags and reach out to other travelers. For example, on Instagram, any hashtag with the city’s name and something like #travel spits out tons of people also traveling. Comment or message them! This takes effort obviously, but remember, nothing good happens from taking no action.

Jodi Ettenberg, from food and travel site Legal Nomads, touches base with experts in her chosen field. “I find that meeting over your passion project or interest is the best way to do so,” she says. “For me, that’s food. I’ve taken to contacting fellow food-obsessed people who are locals or expats in the place I’m visiting. I ask them if they have meetups or events they can suggest for me to meet others with similar interests. While it’s also fun to meet people serendipitously, striking up a conversation at a restaurant or market, this way I get to not only make some new friends, but do so in an industry I’m passionate about.”

Use your social media to see if you can connect with friends of friends, or heck, even followers and people you admire.

Camp Out at Lounges, Bars, or Coffee Shops with Wi-Fi

All travelers have one thing in common: the need for Wi-Fi. If you head to a Starbucks, McDonald’s, a bar, or lounge that offers Wi-Fi, you’re almost certain to bump into other travelers there.

Seek Out Local Facebook Groups

I used to play a lot of ultimate Frisbee. On a whim in Tokyo one day, I decided to check on Google if there were any local Frisbee groups. There were, and they led me to a Facebook group that was active and had practice every Tuesdays and Sundays. They were about to have a pick-up game in two days. Here was my opportunity to enjoy something I loved doing anyway—in another country no less—and meet new people. I only had to make the trek to show up. I was hesitant at first because not knowing a single person was terrifying, but I’m glad I made the effort. They were very welcoming; I met new people and friends that I still talk to today.

Since this discovery, I’ve made it a point to figure out what I wanted to do at a certain destination and Google it. Be it “sumo wrestling tickets in Japan“, “learn archery lessons”, or “make panda rice balls in bento lunch boxes”, I made sure to search and then check Facebook groups for those interests within the city. More often than not, these groups have a combination of expats, fellow travelers, and English-speaking locals that you can message and meet.

Facebook groups are an awesome way to meet English-speaking locals and transplants.

Find People on a Number of “Meetup” Websites and Apps

Everyone immediately thinks of Tinder and Meetup.com, but there are actually a ton of websites that help connect you to other travelers and people who want to meet. Some are specific to countries, such as LEVART in Japan, but here are a handful that you can use anywhere:

Hacker Paradise: Hacker Paradise is a traveling community of digital nomads and other location-independent professionals. They go on multi-month trips, but you can tag along for as little as two weeks if you want to develop more professional relationships.

TravBuddy: TravBuddy combines the usefulness of TripAdvisor and Yelp, but is also a platform that lets you meet other travelers.

ePenPal: This app connects you with locals from all over the world and the best part is that it translates your messages for you (via Google Translate so it’s not perfect).

BonAppetour: This is like Airbnb but for dinner.

Badoo: Badoo seems to be a cross between Facebook for non-friends and a dating service. You get to meet with locals, even if you’re on a time crunch, but keep in mind that a lot of people use this to hook up. Depending on what you’re looking for, Badoo may or may not be for you.

You can also find local events on Facebook and Yelp to go to. The 21st century is amazing like that.

Above All, Keep Yourself Safe

Of course, you need to balance all of these things with safety. In particular, when you meet a stranger via any of these channels or even get into an Uber or Lyft, send a picture and profile of the person with someone you trust. If anything at all seems off about a situation or person, move on. Don’t feel bad about bailing.

As a solo female traveler, I try not to let my FOMO get the best of me if I feel really uncomfortable about a situation. Whenever I travel between places or go off on a new hike somewhere in the mountains, I tell my friends back home, my host, and whomever where I am and when I expect to be back.

It’s important to designate someone to take action after a certain number of days of not hearing from you, or you run the risk of that person “waiting and seeing.” Usually, I say something dire like, “If you don’t hear from me by this day, please call Liam Neeson and start looking for me.” I remember to check in so they don’t worry or call Liam for no reason. I wouldn’t want that happening.

It should be clear by now that you have so many tools at your disposal to meet people that the only things you really need are a desire and a moderate amount of effort. And even then, there are no guarantees, but it doesn’t hurt to try. Bottom-line, making friends and meeting different people are just like back home: you need to be proactive, keep an open mind, and emphasize safety!

The Solo Traveler’s Guide on How to Meet People While Traveling | FY!S