#like how many queer ppl know what it's like

[likeshipsonthesea]

the beauty of this episode for me is how buck imagined this “perfect” traditional family and even though he enjoyed it, it wasn’t the family he’s built with the 118.

buck didn’t pop out of his coma dream and then turn around and be like “okay time to make a traditional family out here,” he popped out of his coma dream and realized he already has all the love and support he could need from his found family at the 118. choosing to welcome his parents into his life wasn’t out of need or desperation for their approval or anything like that--it’s because he wants it.

you may not want it for him, you may want him to cut the buckleys out bc of what they did to him and maddie, and i get it. but he’s choosing to let them in, to have a relationship (not even parental really!! bc he already has maddie!! and bobby!! canonical parental figures!!!) bc it’s nice. yes, nice. sometimes it’s nice to pretend, it’s nice to get together at holidays and have the kids be excited about their grandparents, it’s nice to be able to get along long enough to make some nice memories.

buck is choosing to have a relationship, if a distant one, with his parents who will be going back to pennsylvania in a week because he knows he has his true, closest, loving family in LA.

chimney can recognize that in the buckleys, and he’s giving it a chance. not forgiving his dad, not saying outright “alright we can be a loving family,” he’s saying don’t go back to another continent right this second, stay a few more days. let’s test this out. he’s taking the chance to be happy, to have a nice extended family, bc he knows he doesn’t need it, but he wants to try. that’s the beauty of this episode for me.

choosing to try for a relationship with your family because you want to, not because they’re your only support system.

[vaggieslefteye]

CHARLIE MAGNE from HAZBIN HOTEL (2019): Pilot - "That's Entertainment" ↳ "So, I've been thinking: Isn't there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through... redemption?"

[starlooove]

“Fandom isn’t fun anymore fandom isn’t fun anymore” tbh it just feels like white racist “normies” jumped in as opposed to white racist nerds and for me personally u can feeeel it kinda but it doesn’t change much

[fabiotheguitar]

saw tags on @lottieurl ‘s post and now I find myself also asking the question what does saira think about gay marriage. she hates straight marriage because of its patriarchal origins and family trauma ofc… does it extend to gay marriage? is she talking about the Islamic concept of marriage or the social/economic model of marriage? does she distinguish between the two? does she know that there are imams who do gay marriages? does she know she wants to get gay married? to amin-

[toastsnaffler]

in a hilarious turn of events my flatmate didn't even know I use any pronouns....

[dorkicon]

bitching abt my job again

tags contain frank mentions of transphobia and homophobia

[seilon]

pro: ran into a coworker at a bar last night who I don’t really talk to usually (he works upstairs, I work downstairs) and we talked and im pretty sure we were highkey flirting and he bought me a drink and the bar merch shirt i was interested in and thanks to the power of alcohol i guess i asked for his number and he gladly gave it to me and. yeah

con: i have the second worst hangover i have ever had and have been fighting for my fucking life just to eat saltines

[fridayiminlcve]

if i dont move to nyc or london or paris by age 27 what is the point of anything

[yourheartinyourmouth]

husbeast watched To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything! Julie Newmar with me and he LOVED IT and i could just cry little tears of queer joy. this movie means so much to me as a queer person and as a gender nonconforming and a just generally socially non conformative person.

if you haven’t seen it, you gotta.

[persistent-wallflower]

Dude I'm so bad at this dating stuff. It just never feels right

[osarquivosmagnus]

I have no idea how to articulate this into anything other than a ramble but you know that post about how it's better to surround yourself with well meaning and earnest ppl that may not have the "politically correct" vocabulary about most things but are willing to learn vs assholes that now how to say the right thing but deep down don't really care about why and are just being ""woke"" for the sake of ""woke"" (hell i hate this word) or to feed their own ego? That's exactly how I feel about some movies and tv shows that have come out lately trying to appease to a younger generation, a more "conscientious" generation of young people. Bc at the end of the day they don't give a shit. So most of the characters and plot, even if they have the right "speeches" and names and identities are hollow, annoying and empty. They are selling rainbowed colored plastic. This is nothing. Give me something GOOD not for the sake of BEING good, but simply because people are plural, so is existence and so is fucking fiction

[tododeku-or-bust]

What I need for White Americans (ppl in general really, but I'm talking to the U.S.) to understand about Americans of Color is that You don't know Us, but We know YOU.

We've spent generations upon generations of our entire lives learning YOUR social norms, forced to assimilate to YOUR idea of society. We live and learn entirely separate cultures, but we also learn from birth what it means to have to cater to Whiteness in America. It's why I can name so many famous movies with white casts, but most white people didn't even know where "Bye Felicia" came from. It's why I was raised to professionally Code Switch from childhood, but grown white people struggle to even grasp the basics of the grammar of AAVE. It's why people who speak different languages think they have to give up their own mother tongue just to function in this country.

It's why you all are so uncomfortable with the idea of people of color questioning and rejecting what seems "normal" to you- and to be honest, I actually think older white generations are better at admitting this than younger ones. It's because what you know as normal is usually not "normal"- it's White. Whiteness is just as loud as any other presentation of race in this country, you just don't see it that way because everyone else has been forced to maintain your comfort. The entire system is built around it, and you don't even know it.

It's why it frustrates white Americans of some marginalization- queer, disabled, neurodivergent- because you do not have access to the "norm" as it is shown to you. But that frustration- literally everyone of color (who shares those identities btw) lives under that understanding.

Idk, I didn't really have a direction. I just think it's wild how so many conversations require this... Constant Verbal Leveling of the Playing Field simply because Whiteness blinds white people to what things ACTUALLY look like out here.

[johannestevans]

there's a thread on twitter where like. women are talking about frightening experiences they've had with men, and this person confidently goes, "well other men don't experience the same sexual violence from men that women do" and i'm just like.

i can't comprehend saying such a thing so confidently when you know that men are raped by other men, and when you know, also, that male children are raped by men

like we live in a rape culture that's broadly permissive of many forms of sexual abuse and rape across all manner of different lines, but like. the sexual entitlement felt by many cisgender men in our patriarchal society and their feeling of entitlement particularly to sexual dominion over the vulnerable, and how that includes not only violent dominion over women, but also a desire to emasculate and victimise other men, is? caught up in the same attitude?

like there's a reason that many women talk anecdotally about getting the most of their experiences of catcalling and entitlement when they look underage and esp when they're like, young teens, and that's all to do with the level of power a random dude thinks he can exact over them, bc they're a child and bc they're far more vulnerable

and? of course the same attitude is applied to young boys or young pre-transition t-girls, esp bc of the way that gay or effete traits in young boys are like, targeted for violent correction via sexual violence, but also to many rapists like

accurately signal that this individual is going to be seen as less worthy of protection than adults around them, bc of queerphobic attitudes and the disposability of young queer ppl? that that person is going to be more vulnerable to abuse?

idk i just. i understand that some people get so focused on these radical feminist ideas that they end up incapable of seeing the wood for the trees, but the desperate desire to dismiss sexual violence that might not back up what they think is like. their current most valuable talking point is baffling

as if to say "multiple more vulnerable and marginalised classes of people are vulnerable to sexual violence under this system" somehow takes away from your favourite category of class of person most vulnerable to sexual violence

[vasquez-rocks]

i know most ppl haven’t seen it yet but wanted to write something abt how annoyed some of the critical discourse abt I Saw the TV Glow is making me. MAJOR SPOILERS below the break, be warned!!

so idk i’ve seen so many reviews of the film positing that it’s about the dangers of obsessive fandom and overidentification with fictional characters, esp vis a vis real life self-actualization/coming out. (like, essentially every review has some of this in it, from what i’ve seen.) and, like: i don’t think that’s wrong, but i also think it’s massively underselling what schoenbrun is doing here. the metaphor of the show’s bleed-over is so smart because works in both directions at once.

like, in one direction: when maddy asks owen to come into the show by burying himself alive, you can read it as her asking him to abandon his real-life responsibilities, and the material facts of his real life body, in favor of a fantasy life where everything is already fixed. she’s inviting him to skip over the hard, messy work of transitioning and to sink even deeper into the analgesic obsessions he uses to numb his dysphoria. in this interpretation, it’s, like, the equivalent of overprioritizing “transition goals” instead of actually medically/legally/socially transitioning if that’s what you want, living forever in the ideal instead of taking difficult steps to change the material. (also, uh, if you don’t think she’s literally correct about the nature of reality, she is in fact asking him to kill himself. there’s that.)

BUT! it also works the other way. when maddy tells owen that the show is real, that their lives are just the buried dreams of dying girls in another life, she terrifies him by confronting him with something he’s always known about himself: he was supposed to be a girl. what she proposes is radical, dangerous, seemingly unhinged, and based on a childish fixation: all the things scared closeted trans people worry transition is, basically. on a more figurative level, too, the feeling she’s telling owen is real – that his real life is just a dream within a dream, that his home is not his home, that he belongs somewhere else, that he is supposed to be SOMEONE else – is something so, so, so many closeted trans people have felt before, myself so much included. when he sobs in the shower, yelling “this isn’t my home!” at his dad, i felt a sense of identification stronger than i’ve almost ever gotten from art before. when maddy finally calls him isabel, it’s the gentlest thing i can imagine.

in this read – which i do love, while thinking the other one is simultaneously true – it’s less “come sink deeper into delusion with me instead of dealing with your own life” and more “it’s going to be terrifying, but that childish dream of being a girl you once held wasn’t childish, and it can be real if you’re courageous enough.” he says he runs away from the football field because he thinks maddy’s not mentally well; it takes very little analysis of subtext to figure out he’s running away because he’s afraid of how much he wants what she’s offering. and, of course, the idea of the visible world being an illusion laid atop the world in which one is one’s truest self is a classic trope of trans cinema going all the way back to the matrix. (also: while i’m pretty death-of-the-author-pilled in most media analysis, it kinda seems like schoenbrun themself has interpreted the film in this way, as they’ve spoken at length in interviews about how, to them, transition felt like asking to be buried alive.)

all of which is to say: i think the film IS commenting on fandom, obsession, overidentification, and the ease with which queer people can sink into art as a way to dissociate from real life. but i think it makes the film so much more cynical and so much less tender to treat it as the ONLY read of the film’s relationship with the pink opaque. art, especially the sort of slow, metaphor-laden art schoenbrun makes, is best when it is complex and productively contradictory. the pink opaque is a problem, and an escape, and a fantasy, and it’s real, and one day isabel is going to wake up.

[spock-smokes-weed]

re the new hbomberguy video:

my jaw was on the floor for the whole second half of the video. The gaul of James Somerton and a lot of things getting put into perspective really shocked me.

I was never a subscriber of James, but with the spaces I moved through on the internet, youtube was always recommending his videos to be. I watched a handful of them and liked them well enough, but there was always this sour attitude from him I didn't like. He came across as an elitist so I just never stuck around with his channel. The thing that really made me stop watching entirely is the disdain he had for younger queer ppl. Like old man yells at cloud "these ungrateful fags don't know where they came from" type stuff.

But since his videos (for the most part) seemed well-researched and well-thought-out, I understood why he had the following he did and respected his place on the platform. Now knowing all of the parts I liked were stolen from other people and the only original thoughts he could bring to the table were all the snide remarks about other queer people really makes me fucking angry. I didn't watch him enough to know about the lesbophobia and misogyny, but fucking YIKES.

It really makes my blood boil to see a cis gay man make himself the main character by stepping on the backs of other people in the community.

Not only that, but it's fucking sick how many people he implicated in his plagiarism. He had people funding his scam, thinking they were supporting a small queer researcher. Literally taking money out of the pockets of the people he was stealing from. It's not 100% confirmed yet, but it looks like his co-writer also had no idea about the theft, and if that's true then James really is the biggest piece of shit on planet earth.

Does he get how serious plagiarism is? Does he understand what it means to be fucking implicated in something like that? He says Nick comes from academia and is a published author; does he realize this could fucking ruin Nick's career and any future potential in the publishing industry? It's also sick he would use an unsuspecting party as a shield for his own wrongdoing.

I'm currently in school for a career in academia and the situation Nick is in is the kind of nightmare that leaves you in a cold sweat.

[navysealt4t]

okayy sorry not sorry one more post about this movie. so many reviews and ppl are claiming that this movie isn’t necessarily queer at its core which is. so wrong??? like from a plot view point. [SPOILERS AHEAD MASSIVE SPOILERS!]

when maddy tells owen she likes girls and asks him if he does too, he says (to paraphrase) “i don’t know, i like tv shows. when i think about that stuff, it feels like someone’s ripped me open and tore out all my organs.” after he watches the finale of the pink opaque, he’s vomiting the blue luna juice and sobbing about how this isn’t real, which i relate to like feeling trapped in this unaccepting environment . he does this right after realizing he is isabel, but he still hides it and shoved it down and represses it. then there’s obviously the end, where he cuts himself open in the bathroom and sees the static inside of himself for what it is. it calls back to the line “it feels like someone’s ripped me open and tore out my organs.” which was a REPONSE to being asked about specifically sexuality and more broadly, queerness. there aren’t organs there. there’s the static. he was right and it’s a relief and it’s terrifying and it’s full of guilt and shame and regret and fear. it’s the experience of seeing yourself after years of hiding and repression and it’s directly a queer experience. like hello