nutmeg-heath946

[james-stark-the-writer]

5 episodes into Deadloch and this show is so much more fun when it isn't trying to pretend like it's not copaganda like genuinely a really fun mystery and executed super well and then the lib-ish politics of the show keep popping in like "hey fuck the gender binary" and "hey queer people don't murder, we get murdered" and "hey our lead is a lesbian cop" and it's like shut the fuck up already my god. like you're bringing up all these issues you're clearly not gonna fucking reckon with because you can't by the nature of the show unless this ends with cops getting abolished in australia so like what are you doing here, you know? like in the first few minutes of episode 1, the lead lesbian cop finds ACAB spray painted on her neighbor's garbage cans and we just haven't gone anywhere with that, it's not like used to critique the system or anything, and her response is just to get it cleaned up. so like. it's just kinda infuriating.

[legobiwan]

Another story idea:

One of the - and I hesitate to call them "issues" as I think the series is pretty complete on its own - but one of the loose threads from the end of Gravity Falls Season 2 I'd like to tug at is the ease with which Ford finds redemption after his return to his dimension.

On the surface, it seems like the only person he needs to work to reconcile with is his brother, with whom he can barely share a civilized conversation with until after the zodiac is broken and the elder Pines twins are left seemingly helpless in Bill's improvised prison.

And yes, Ford gets the kick in the ass he needs after his brother's memory is erased (at his own hand), as he realizes at that juncture just how much his hubris has cost him (even if he hadn't consciously valued the relationship with his brother before, there have been steady hints throughout the series and books that Ford values Stan in some way, even if he's shit at showing it).

But it's all...rather easy.

McGucket asserts that he's done forgetting and ready to forgive, even though he was probably the biggest victim to Ford's actions and ego throughout the entire series. (There was another post I saw around here about "hurt people hurt people." Bill may have been awful to Ford, but Ford was almost equally as awful to Fiddleford).

Give me a story where McGucket starts to gain back those memories - of his anxiety and panic and near-slavish devotion to a man who barely gave him the time of day. Give me a Fiddleford who won't take Ford back after this all comes back to light, who finally grows a spine and cuts ties with someone who mistreated him for years.

Give me a story where Mabel is outwardly enthusiastic towards Ford, but also afraid. Afraid that she's not enough for him, that she can't be her brother, that Ford will look down on her. Give me Mabel acting out in her most-Mabelest ways to try to both win over Ford and smooth out the relationship between him and Stan (and knowing she's a child coming from an unsettled home life, this hits all the worse).

Give me a story where Dipper realizes the truth of the old quote, "never meet your heroes." Where he finally come to terms with the fact that Ford is just a person - and a very flawed person, at that. A person who nearly sold the world for his ego and worse yet, held his grunkle and sister with little regard, held Dipper's own future with little regard except how it would benefit Ford.

And yes, finally, give me a story where Stan and Ford have the seriously hash things out. Where they ned to come to terms with their trauma from their youth (and the one thing I can't blame Ford for is what happened with the science fair project. Stan shouldn't have been there and he knew better. Stan also knew he was less than second banana to his brother his entire life, and his father made no bones about showing it. Say what you will, but an almost-18-year-old Ford was never going to react well to that situation, nor would he totally understand the consequences of Filbrick kicking Stan out at that age. Stan was also horrifically co-dependent on his brother, something his parents should have helped to sort out way earlier). Stan needs to sort his issues with both his (now-assumedly-dead) parents, as does Ford. Ford needs to come clean as to the who, what, where and why of Oregon. And Stan needs a reason to live for himself, and not for others - especially not his brother, from whom he has an almost desperate need for affection. (And you have to wonder, after 30 years...now that he's gotten Ford back, is there some kind of pit that's opened up in Stan, some raison d'être that's vanished leaving him uncertain as to everything in life, even with Ford vowing change and ships and adventures from his end. That's got to be one hell of a whiplash).

Anyway, what I'm saying is I love Ford but there's a ton he has to reckon with, and worst off, he has to reckon with other people if he truly wants to change. (And oh no, can I think of another two-dimensional being who may be going through the same thing in a time-warped psychiatric institution, hmmm, I wonder...)

[larissa-the-scribe]

Terrarium Lights

Part 1 of 3 for @inklings-challenge

An older lady befriends and adopts a ghost she found in her garden

Next part >>here

Michael Goffrey bid his wife farewell as he left for his next shipping job, and Gail Goffrey was once again faced with the fact that her house was cavernously empty.

She had expected the house to feel empty after her children grew up and moved on with their lives; that was the sort of thing one always heard about from the mothers and wives left behind. However, everyone seemed to stress the loneliness—not the rather more intense boredom.

Gail had always preferred quiet and alone time, so she did not take issue with the solitude. However, though she still had to cook and mend and clean and tidy and all the other tasks, it was one thing to do so for six people and quite another, shorter thing to do so for two. It was even less of a thing to do so for one, since Michael had been promoted to first mate and now had to accompany the airships personally, no longer simply loading and unloading at the cloudends as he once did.

Empty and meaningless. That’s what it felt like. With her family, she had people to help and care for. With just herself, she felt as though she were wasting time walking in circles for no other purpose than to exist.

She made it to the second day without any significant issue.

She was out tending to the herb garden when it happened—a bug wandered in front of her. That shouldn’t have been a problem. Bugs were some of her favorite creatures. But after the first smile, it hit her that she hadn't seen a new kind of one in months—this one already had three sketches in her notebook.

She’d run out of garden bugs to document.

Bugs, of all things. Bugs were everywhere, bugs had never-ending variations, bugs were constant. And she’d run out of them.

Stabbing the trowel into the earth perilously close to the offending bug, she sat back on her heels and looked up at the sky.

"Well, Lord, I reckon you put me on your good Earth for a reason. And I don't think it was just to sketch bugs." She smoothed her apron out, flicking bits of dirt off of it. "I also doubt I'm done with what I'm supposed to do down here, otherwise I wouldn't be here. But if you don't mind me saying, I'm awfully bored of where I am, though I do love my house and my husband and my town quite fierce. But I have all the time in the world, and I'd like to do good with it, if I could. So if you could show me what to do where I can—give me eyes to see as who I can do good towards—then I would appreciate it mightily."

Gail had prayed similar prayers before, with varying regularity. She knew the good Lord had heard her, as he always did. And if he answered with more solitude and time and boredom, then she supposed that was where she was meant to be for the moment. But she dearly hoped there might be something new this time.

So, really, she shouldn't have been surprised to see someone under the loquat tree. But then again, it had been raining since before dawn, so no one in their right mind would have been outdoors. She should know, since she herself had been out gathering moss for terrariums and hadn't heard a breath from anyone all day, even near the city.

Her first impression was that the lad was quite young. Younger than her youngest, in fact, who had not too long ago started her career as a professor at the nearby university. Looked perhaps like he could be one of her students. Very slight of build, as though he needed to eat more, and small looking as he sat hunched in the rain and letting the wet drip down his messy hair, full of loose ends that had gotten free from his ponytail.

Gail stood at the edge of her garden for a moment, resting her pail of moss against the stone border as she observed him.

He didn't move, just sat there with his face turned towards the soil, and didn't seem to see her. Part of his shoulder seemed stained, perhaps with mud. With the house not a few feet to the left, she wondered if he'd tried to knock and not gotten an answer, what with her out and about.

Well, unexpected or not, there was really only one thing to do.

Gripping her pail handle resolutely, Gail marched her way through the garden paths and stood in front of him. He shifted at the sound of her approach, turning his face up towards her—his eyes were pale, as if someone had sketched them on and not bothered with paint. What's more, up closer, the brownish stain on his shoulder looked rather like dried blood.

He tilted his head, as if trying to tell where the sound had come from.

"Well then," she said after a long moment of trying to figure out what to say, "who might you be?"

"Oh." He looked more directly at her, and somehow the eyes looked a bit more colored in, like they remembered they could be brown. "Dreadfully sorry, ma'am. I seem to have gotten lost in the rain. I hope you don't mind me taking a few moments here under your tree?"

He hadn't answered the question, but he seemed more surprised than shifty. "Not at all. Unpleasant weather to be lost in, for sure. If you'd like, you can wait it out under a roof."

"Oh," he said again, and looked to his left; this time it seemed like he understood what he was seeing. "I suppose that would be nicer."

"Well, you're welcome to my roof, if you’d like," she said. She wondered how long he would take her up on that.

He awkwardly stumbled to his feet before she could offer her hand. "That's very kind of you, ma'am."

"Would you like anything to eat?" She went ahead and led the way to the kitchen door.

He hummed thoughtfully. "Thank you ma’am, but I don't think I'm hungry."

She didn't think he would be, but, well, it wasn't like she had experience with this. Which concerned her—she had no idea what she was supposed to be doing. At least he didn't seem to be wicked. She supposed he must need a helping hand and, while she needed to figure out what that help was, he was still just a boy; she would do him the courtesy of treating him accordingly.

The porch and floors, old and creaky since long before she and her husband and infant son had moved in decades ago, greeted them with typical fanfare as they trudged over the threshold. She dripped her way over to the stove, where she put the kettle on; it was unlikely that her visitor would want any, but she most certainly did. Setting her pail of moss by the stove to deal with later, she glanced back to see the lad standing in the middle of the space, staring up at the roof.

Gail wondered if he noticed that he wasn't wet.

"Say," she said, carefully pulling teacups out of the cupboard, "what did you say your name was?"

He looked at her sharply. "I… I don't think I did."

"Hmmmm. Well, how should I call you, then?"

He stared at her.

In the background, the rain continued on.

"Should I just call you ma'am, then?" He said, smiling faintly.

Gail squinted at him. "Now then, young man, are you dodging the question deliberately, or do you just not have an answer?"

"Oh." He glanced around the kitchen, then back to her, and blanked. "Sorry, what was the question?"

Gail rested back against the counter. She picked up her glasses from where she'd left them this morning, and stuck them on, pushing the temples through her sodden mess of hair. "I was just asking what your name was."

His eyes widened. "I… don't… Didn't I answer that?"

"Not as I can recall."

"That… that was rude of me, then, wasn't it?" His eyes were still wide, and the brown was fading.

Maybe it was rude of her to keep pressing the matter. He seemed not to know. Gail pressed her glasses firmer on her nose, trying to reach some kind of decision—but whatever was going on with her guest had been set in motion.

"What is my name?" He asked, his voice rising. "I can't remember my name."

"That's alright, dear," she said, trying to distract him, calm him down. "Do you remember where you were before my garden?"

It had the opposite effect.

He stepped back, towards the door, and glanced around with eyes that no longer understood where he was. "No… I-I can't remember… where am I? Do you know my name?"

"I'm afraid I—"

The kettle shrieked into the space between them with a rush of steam.

The lad cast a wild glance in its direction, stepped backwards. Gail, startled into motion, scrambled to shut the thing off.

When she turned back, the space where he had stood was dry and empty. She and the rain and her pail of terrarium moss had been left alone again.

Next

[pebblysand]

okay, you guys seemed to love these last season so here we go again: selling sunset hot takes, S7E1-5.

whoever is responsible for imposing that mansion tax has my utmost respect. tax the rich plz.

i don't think we talked enough about that basket ball that amanza was dragging around in ep 1.

talking about amanza: yes, she is a shit stirrer, i called it in s2 and i am baffled it took this long for the show to self-actualise on this issue.

i also don't think we talked enough about jason's baby powdered balls.

i was equally shocked by the fact that brett seems to have a tongue and a brain that together are capable of producing words.

having said that, talking about jason, he remains The Worst. i don't even know how to explain. that man is a walking red flag and the fact that he seems to have survived a life's worth of terrible professional, financial, and personal terrible decision-making is truly a wonder.

that said, we need to stop pretending their income at this stage comes from real estate. most of the money they get is from the show. which is why, i suppose, they're able to open new offices when all of their competitors are shutting down.

as someone who knows a little bit about real estate, the house they were in for the O Group anniversary dinner had real architectural value, which is notable because none of the houses ever do.

romaine-like-the-salad remains my favourite character in this show and i swear sometimes i can hear him think in french.

that said, he and mary being pregnant is the one good news of this season, although they totally knew before that test and their "surprise" was very poor acting.

i am also happy for mary that she stepped back from management. i think this is good for everyone, but mostly her.

now onto the hot stuff: i think when it comes to bre v. chelsea, they actually both have a fair point. i do think chelsea was trying to genuinely apologise, but what she was apologising for was exactly what she said: if you don't have anything nice to say, say nothing. she had nothing nice to say and still said things, and now recognises that she shouldn't have. having said that, her view on bre's situation is so clearly rooted in very personal christian beliefs that she's not going to intrinsically change her mind. and actually, this might be my hottest take to date but... i think that's fine. like, as chelsea said, "i don't agree with everything my friends do." she would have been fine being bre's friend but bre wants her to approve of her situation (which, imo, is because deep down, bre is a bit insecure about her situation) and that's never going to happen. my hot take last year was that chelsea had a point, and i think she still does.

this is a bit of a side point but i thought chelsea was at least 40. i'm 30 and i swear my friends and i don't look that old. proof that packing your face with plastic doesn't actually make you look younger.

which, another tangent but why did everyone make such a big deal of the accusation that nicole has had work done? THEY ARE ALL PACKED IN PLASTIC.

and onto the hotter stuff: the situation between nicole v everyone else is starting to bore me. nicole is clearly wrong. nicole has been wrong for two seasons now. let's move on. that said, i had to google what "social climber" meant because i don't think it means the same thing to me as it does to them.

and on chrishell v. marie-lou: so this is actually a hot take, i think, but i do reckon they both have a point. on the one hand, marie-lou is, it's true, rather young and insecure, but she also has reasons to be. they've all made fun of her age, and i feel like her age isn't her fault, and she doesn't seem to me particularly more immature than them. additionally, jason is clearly still in love with chrishell but because he is The Worst, she cannot have that conversation with him, she's turning to chrishell who, in fairness, has no power over that.

i will also say that as a european who's lived in the US, i think what she is holding against chrishell is more of a cultural difference, than it is anything else. what she's basically saying is that chrishell is "american-fake," meaning that she is nice and enthusiastic on the surface but doesn't actually "care." which to marie-lou reads as fake and rude, but to chrishell reads as polite. standards of politeness and casual social interactions are some of the biggest cultural differences between europeans and americans, and i think that's where you'll find that most of the issue is.

i also thought that chrishell, in that scene, used her language superiority to overpower marie-lou. chrishell is someone who speaks a bit fast and is very good at arguing. which is fine when she's with other americans but with marie-lou who is german, whose english is clearly not great, it very quickly feels like bullying. i don't think she meant it as such but marie-lou was taking a bit of time, trying to find her words to get her point across, and chrishell didn't have the patience and kept badgering her. i do believe that had she let marie-lou talk, they would have realised 1) my point above about cultural differences and 2) that the source of all their problem is jason's toxicity and lack of accountability, and that he should be locked in a safe room for the rest of his miserable life.

the way he was trying to hang up the phone during that fight had me in TEARS, like: do i need to be in this conversation? YES. YES. YOU CREATED THIS MESS. you are the weakest, most pathetic little man on the planet.

having said the above, obviously, chrishell has attenuating circumstances for her snapping and bullying of marie-lou and i'm glad she's feeling better now. we are still #teamchrishell in this house, we just need to acknowledge that sometimes our girl makes mistakes.

lastly, did anyone else think the reveal that amanza was molested as a child was a bit random? like, i'm sorry for her but also it felt a bit like it didn't have anything to do with anything. i wonder if it was just there to reconcile she and chelsea.

i will come back with more hot takes whenever i have time to watch the rest of the season lol.

[disaac614]

My Final Playoff 4 Prediction

So we are here. In less than 12 hours we will have 4 teams that are going to the College Football Playoffs for 2022.

First, let me talk about Alabama real quick. They are not on my list of the 4 in and they shouldn't be either. Alabama has a weak resume compared to other teams contending. If you are a Bama fan and you believed with TCU losing today you had a chance... it was false hope. Yes, there were two close losses that Alabama had, but they were critical losses. If it was only the Tennessee loss, you may have a strong case to be in but LSU taking you out in overtime with no mercy killed your season in full because it killed your biggest argument... you would have been in Atlanta playing that Georgia Team that locked in the #1 spot with no question. Instead, you will let someone else decide your fate and the rules in football. You NEVER let anyone else control your story or destiny because you won't like where it ends. For Alabama, it will end up with them at a good bowl. I think it will be in New Orleans at the Sugar Bowl.

Let's break down my 4 Remember, it will be 1 vs 4 and 2 vs 3.

Hint if you have seen my earlier picture with Michigan's win. The top 2 are locked in hard with NO QUESTIONS WHATSOEVER

Georgia - After decimating LSU 50-30. They have done exactly what they need to do to impress the CFP Committee. They are a force to be reckoned with heading into the playoffs and they feel as good as they should. They are 12-0 and that is impressive as it gets There was NO point in this game where LSU was close and get this, LSU put up 549 yards of offense and still lost by 20! Georgia is the best team in the SEC and that should be scary for everyone because Georgia's is to make it everyone's problem in the CFP.

Michigan - Michigan's objective was to simply prove to everyone that they can be that other problem across the field in this playoff and they don't have any hangover from beating the Buckeyes in The Shoe. It wasn't as flashy as Georgia because that is not their style. They want to control the line and run the ball, they did that tonight over Purdue with a 43-22 win. They also showed they were disciplined on the line and not giving up yards via needless penalties. This is a scary combination that could cause some issues for teams in the playoff and #2 feels right for them.

Now, this is where the conversation begins with questions about where TCU will go after the loss? Can Ohio State be #3 in the nation by not playing? Can Alabama sneak in there? Here are my answers for you!

3. TCU - Yes, they lost against Kansas State 31-28 BUT and this is a MAJOR BUT! TCU lost in OT where they went for it on a VERY Gettable 4th Down. They only lost by a field goal, the only way Alabama was going to move in was if TCU was eviscerated by at least 14 points by K-State. Also very important even after the loss they are still a one-loss team that lost to a team they already beat in a Conference Championship Game! Alabama and Ohio State can't say that at all. Knocking TCU for a close loss would force us to ask this question: Why play Conference Championships if the team is in a situation like TCU? There was a small window of wins for TCU but a lot to lose if you choke. I'm not going to penalize them for playing the extra game they have rightly earned in this case. So at #3, I'll hold them on the spot. Can you ding them more? Sure, but there should be no question that if they do, it should be no LOWER than #4 In my eyes, period.

4. Ohio State - With Utah Decimating USC 47-24. USC is out of the 4 and should be ding in a major way. It was USC's second loss and they were on shaky ground before that. USC needed that win but we knew a one-loss team was about to move in. Enter Ohio State. They hammered teams by double digits all season long until Michigan beat them by double digits at The Shoe. The resume is as good as you can get with only one loss. In fact, even though the one loss was against #3 at the time Michigan, which looking at losses, looks pretty damn good compared to Alabama's shaky resume. Ohio State is in. I've heard that they should be at #3. I don't think they should be in at 3 over TCU because TCU lost at their Conference Championship game and Ohio State was at home back in Columbus. That is a critical point that has to be made here and was probably made in that room for sure last night.

That's my 4 take it or leave it.

[mermaidsirennikita]

How come the Bridgerton fandom clearly posts pictures of Simone out enjoying a holiday with friends not at all bothered by all this promo discourse, and still whine abt how Simone is clearly being sidelined. she is literally out there enjoying her life. Stop acting like your fighting for some righteous cause when really you just want to see Kate/Anthony. Especially when everyone in fandom is so quiet when it comes to things like the india plot line & actual racist implications of some of the shows plot lines.

I bet when the show comes out no one will want to discuss that as it is just ‘escapism’ and they don’t want to hv kathony ruined for them.

I will say this--Simone can be enjoying her life and be sidelined by Netflix. She clearly doesn't have work commitments going on preventing her from promoting like JB does, so I do think she should be called up even for little fluff interviews more (a lot of print interviews would be done further in advance of course, but zoom interviews are another thing--but even those would've had to have been booked in advance, idk). But I do think it would be demeaning to suggest that she's sitting by the phone waiting for a call, because she clearly isn't. That's what I like about Simone; she seems like a gregarious, fun person. With that being said! I'd like to see more of her. I do think the promo should have more focus on her, if it's going to be focused on anyone.

But yeah, absolutely people are dismissing the shit the show is *actually* doing in favor of talking about promo, which is where I started to side-eye shit. When I started seeing the same people calling out the promo go "I don't think the India plot is a big deal/this season will be flawless regardless" I was like... eeeeeeeeeh. Much of why I myself am more sensitive to the promo issues, personally, is because I though the show exhibited some truly spectacular bullshit re: race in season 1. With the backstory, with Marina... It went on and out, and the India plot has me quite worried. All of this reminds me of how many (white) viewers basically dismissed the concerns about s1 the last go around, because like... RJP is there. Ruby is there. People of color are in Regency clothing. Why aren't they happy??? Like, that was the vibe. And it was bad.

Just because you love Kate and Anthony doesn't mean that you can't reckon with the bullshit that is.... having the India plot be there at all, at least in the form that it seems to be. You can worry about Simone being sidelined and critique the show for its very real issues. Both are possible. Simone being on this show doesn't mean that it gets a pass for the bullshit it plays with (not just in the plot, but in the lack of diversity in the writer's room) just as s1 didn't deserve a pass because RJP was there.

To me, the promo is bad and I don't like it... Though shit, it seems weird to me to complain about Simone being sidelined, then say that Golda, a woman of color, shouldn't have done a Tatler cover. Even if Golda had said "oh no, call Simone Ashley", they probably wouldn't have called Simone Ashley. And I don't think there's much.... good to be done in tearing down one woman of color in favor of another. Idk, there's just more nuance that needs to be had in these discussions. I'm not saying "don't critique promo". I'm saying that if you are white, consider the language with which you are critiquing the promo, know your role, stay in your lane. And if someone is a person of color, -particularly if they are Indian, and they say "yeah, but I'm actually really worried about this India plot"... Don't dismiss it. Personally, I think I probably stepped out of my lane a bit with how I discussed things at points, and I do regret that and apologize if I made anyone feel spoken over. I don't like the promo, and I don't like Penelope, but those are hardly the only issues at hand here. I mean, they clearly have Simone putting on an accent in one clip, and that was... kinda not discussed much? And hopefully it's not a huge issue and hopefully it's handled sensitively, but idk. Just weird to me that the *one* issue (which has more to do with the ship in general) is being discussed most while the other issues (which pertain to the show at large and its handling of race) are being less discussed.

The thing is that the show should be escapism.... for everyone. But it can't be escapism for many people of color if they're watching it and having their cultural history turned into a fun plot point, ya know?

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Grace

Rio: Hey Rio: rough night, I hear Grace: Ugh Rio: That bad? Grace: Let's just not Grace: mum and dad have obvs given you the goss so like Rio: they just said you might wanna talk Rio: I'm out of the loop Rio: try me Grace: oh please none of you wanna pick up the phone unless Janis uses hers to call me out Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Rio: that ain't true Rio: and I'm here now Grace: sure babes Rio: come on Rio: you're gonna do me that dirty? Rio: pop an aspirin and spill Grace: there's no big drama, I've already told literally everyone that Rio: then why has it been made into one Rio: your chance to put your side across, don't be too pouty to take it Grace: UM hello, cos Janis is extra Grace: 🤞 that we'll all forget she took nan's car the other night if we focus on me rn Rio: So she made it up? Grace: she made it into something it's not duh Grace: so I hit up my ex Rio: Not like her to get involved, ever Rio: never mind for nothing Rio: what's up with that? Grace: like I said, mum and dad are !!!! about her and her bf so Grace: she's over it Rio: Who even is he Rio: some english kid, they said Grace: mhmm Grace: he's the hot new boy at school Rio: isn't there anyone new you've got your eye on Rio: exes are never a good idea, drama unwarranted or nah Grace: It's not like he's ever gonna be more than that Grace: I just needed a ride thanks Rio: You can't be doing that, babe Grace: I didn't end up doing anything, it's fine Rio: That ain't the point, you know that Rio: you treat lads like shit, give them the warrant to do it back Rio: you don't need to be living like that Grace: He already did, that's why he's an ex Rio: and that's why you don't hit him up Rio: that is not an ex, honey Grace: OMG he took me to a party not a registry office Rio: No one is concerned you're taking it too seriously Rio: not seriously enough Grace: Great, it's your turn to call me a hoe now Grace: love that Rio: Stop Rio: trying to be so right you hear us all wrong Rio: not taking serious how you let lads treat you Grace: No, Ri you can stop Grace: however bad you want me to feel I already do, trust Grace: it was the worst day, I tried to make it better Grace: that did NOT happen Grace: & now I'm over it Rio: I don't want you to feel bad, that's the whole point Rio: so what happened Grace: Nothing! I went to the fair with one boy, he left so I called another to take me home Grace: like I'm so sorry I'm not still there literally stranded Rio: You wouldn't be stranded don't be ridiculous Rio: we're not daft, you didn't need to go anywhere with that lad Rio: what happened to the first lad then Grace: well I OBVS wanted to Grace: who wouldn't after such a cringe date Rio: but your ex is a twat, no Rio: what kind of solution Grace: he doesn't pretend he isn't Rio: that makes it alright then Rio: come off it Rio: it's ice cream and bitching you need, not pencilling in another immediately after Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: I'm not 9 hun Rio: Yes, you're very mature Rio: for God's sake Grace: Excuse you Grace: I shouldn't have called him okay but it's not that deep Rio: you two need to sort it out Rio: mum and dad don't need this Grace: OMG Grace: how dare you Grace: that bitch literally put herself in REAL danger, that's not me Rio: that's not what I heard Grace: Yeah? Grace: so when you literally just said that they told you I wanted to talk that was a lie Rio: well they're not going to just throw that at me with no context Grace: & the context is ???? Rio: Grace, tbh, I don't have the time to relay to you what you did, hence asking you at the start of this conversation Grace: mhmm Grace: you never have time for any of us Grace: & now you expect me to open up to you or something Rio: things change Rio: I'm not a child anymore either, I've got my own family, a job Rio: just because I can't be here 24/7 doesn't mean I'm not still your big sister Grace: Just stop Grace: pretending that you care about me Grace: treating me like I'm still 12 Grace: you can just stop Rio: we all care about you, Grace Grace: thanks for not wanting me to also get killed, obvs Grace: but like I've got that covered Rio: Clearly not Rio: I thought you were better than this Rio: we need less people in this family acting so recklessly Rio: why do you have to join in Grace: UM Janis is the one drunkenly trying to joyride Grace: give her some of this energy Rio: and you think getting taken to a party where you don't know anyone and it's majority older men then getting blackout drunk is any less dangerous Rio: worry about yourself Rio: she's a separate issue Grace: That isn't even what I did Grace: he lied to me about the party Rio: this is why you can't associate with people you already know are bad news Rio: you're a smart girl, you need to act like it or you'll get taken advantage of Rio: none of us want to see that Rio: you don't need me to tell you all the worse things that could've happened, my god, just like Janis doesn't need us to explain to her the dangers of what she did, but we still have to if you're both going to be pulling stunts like this Grace: I need for Janis not to tell mum and dad that I'm following in yours, Edie's and Carly's footsteps depending on the mood Grace: if she'd left me alone I wouldn't have been that drunk Grace: it's totally her fault that I couldn't just go home Rio: You can't put yourself in needless danger because you two are having a spat Rio: there's no scenario in life you don't take responsibility for your actions, babe Rio: because you'd be the one getting hurt, not her Grace: OMG it wasn't about her! I literally told you I was having the worst day Grace: like you've never hit up an ex cos he's a sure thing Grace: & I'm so sure Buster was right there whenever & that was always a good idea Rio: You just said it was Rio: and even if this was about me and my mistakes, which it isn't at all, what, you think that means it's okay for you to repeat them and I'll be cool with that Rio: god love them but I am not mum and dad, that's not how I do things okay Grace: & you just said I'm the problem Grace: I know, okay? Rio: I did not Grace: whatever, babes Rio: Do not whatever me Rio: I didn't, and you don't get to dismiss actual advice and concern because you're in a strop Grace: ugh Grace: in a strop? Really Rio: Yes, really Grace: You literally have no idea how I feel Rio: then tell me Grace: I'd honestly rather die than have you report back to mum and dad anything I've ever said Rio: for god's sake Rio: that isn't what it's about Grace: Oh okay, you just happen to be in my inbox Grace: it's so not cos I won't tell them anything Rio: If you don't feel good, it needs to be sorted Rio: that isn't going to happen if you keep doing what you're doing and don't talk to any of us Grace: I can't talk to any of you, you're my problem Rio: if you aren't mature enough to talk about this, then I'll have to tell 'em as much Grace: No, this family is literally my problem Grace: growing up in it as the ugliest one, the stupidest one Rio: why would you even think something like that Grace: Duh, it's what everyone thinks Rio: no it's not Rio: and the ones that say they do are not worth listening to Rio: there's always going to be the ones that say horrible things, but that doesn't mean it's true Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Rio: don't roll your eyes like it doesn't matter Rio: it does Grace: your mum answers don't matter & they don't help me Rio: Grace, you need to help yourself Rio: you have to decide it isn't going to get to you, and then it's a process of actively ignoring that and telling yourself the opposite, surrounding yourself with other people who lift you up too, not drag you down Rio: then, you stand a chance of believing it Rio: lamenting how mean people are and blaming us, will never make you feel better Rio: you deserve to feel better than that, you need to Grace: OMG you chose to do everything you did online & marry our cousin, I didn't choose to look like this Grace: You don't know what it's like & you can't Grace: none of you do so stop judging me for how I deal with it Rio: And you can choose to reckon I deserve it then, that all the rest of us do Rio: but that'll never stop them judging you as well Rio: anything you do, they still will, that's just life I'm afraid Rio: and I'm not judging how you deal with it, I'm telling you I see that you aren't Rio: uncomfortable as that might make you, it's because I want you to, I want you to feel better Grace: Wow, thanks Rio: Deal with it, seriously Rio: this is no way to live your life Grace: Good talk, babes Grace: so motivational Rio: Shut the fuck up with your fake bullshit for once and take it in Rio: I am so sick of this, I'm not doing it again Grace: I have Janis for my tough love so Rio: It's not tough love Rio: consider why someone just trying to be real with you feels like an attack Rio: you can't fake that those defenses are real with me, girl Rio: I've known you longer than you've known yourself Grace: honey, I know why, I know everything I am & everything I'm not Grace: of course I'm the fakest Grace: why would I wanna be real? Rio: You know what they say you are Rio: and you're prepared to live up to that and that alone Rio: no life, like I said Rio: you can do so much better Grace: cos being real worked out so well for Edie, right? Grace: & Janis is really living her best life with that honesty too now Rio: Stop deflecting as if this is about anyone but you Rio: you are no better off Rio: it'll kill you just as fast Grace: I can't separate myself from any of you, that, like I said, is my problem Rio: yet again, because you're obsessed with the validation you'll never get from arseholes who have no stake in seeing you win Rio: they want another show and you are giving it Rio: this family has done nothing but encourage you to be yourself, ever Grace: Do you even remember what 15 feels like? Take a sec, babes Rio: Like I said, you won't get the 'we all make mistakes' off me Rio: you can learn, you have so much opportunity Grace: Opportunity to keep being compared & always come last in that comparison, sure Grace: 👌👌👌 Rio: so be a loser, yeah? Rio: prove them right Rio: because who have you won over here Rio: your bitchy friends that are more trouble than they're worth Grace: they OBVS are right, I'm not pretty or smart Grace: I'm a bitch and not in the way where it's actually goals Grace: so like ??? Rio: None of that is true Rio: but we can't have this conversation if you're at a place where you believe it is Grace: bye then Grace: catch you at the next crisis 👋 Rio: No, Grace Rio: you don't get to feel justified in thinking none of us care just because the help you need goes beyond what we can say and do Rio: I'm getting you professional help, but it won't work unless YOU want it to Rio: and if you don't, if you're happy to settle for this then yes, you are exactly like her Grace: You're not mum, stop acting like it Rio: it's your decision, and one you know full-well she won't think is a bad idea Rio: let alone put a stop to Grace: Duh, she never puts a stop to anything Rio: You'll be able to discuss all of that Rio: you need someone impartial Rio: you're never going to take on what we say, if we're the problem to you Grace: I'm not mental Rio: for goodness sake, who said you were Rio: you're having problems, you work on solving them Grace: OMG my problems aren't that big of a deal Grace: just cos most of this fam are in love with themselves Grace: leave me alone Rio: They are Rio: the way you've said you've felt is horrible Rio: you shouldn't have to live with that every day Rio: you don't have to Grace: the way you're trying to freak me out is worse Grace: I don't wanna talk to some random therapist wtf Rio: I'm not, there's nothing to be scared of remotely Rio: do you wanna feel better? Grace: I'm not telling a stranger everything about me, that's so gross Rio: You don't, you lead the conversation, talk about what you want to Rio: and it's totally confidential, she isn't on her coffee break slagging you off Grace: I don't want to talk about anything Rio: How well has that worked for you so far then, eh Rio: you will Rio: and the offer will still stand then Grace: STOP Rio: No, I won't Rio: how much shit has been allowed to happen in this family through not talking is ridiculous Rio: it's time for that to fucking stop, alright Grace: Please, Rio Rio: I'm not saying it won't be painful but can you tell me living like this doesn't hurt Rio: the mess we're all in Grace: it's like I told Janis, it's too little too late Grace: I can't just like undo everything Rio: It never is Rio: you aren't dead Rio: and being 15 will not last forever, the friends, the feelings, none of it Rio: you'll always have yourself and you should be fucking good with that Grace: I'll want to be if I have to talk about everything that's wrong Rio: it's daunting Rio: but you can do it Rio: if you live like this, you burn out Rio: we've all seen it, as I said, I'm not prepared to do it again so easily Grace: or I'll get pregnant & turn my life around like every other woman in this fam Rio: Give you that, but it's not funny Grace: 😂😂😂/😭😭😭 Grace: 🤷 it'll be Janis now she's so in love anyway Rio: it'll be neither of you, no discussion needed Grace: aw babes, it's okay Grace: we've all had that discussion Rio: I've already told you it's no joke Rio: so have I, so had mum Grace: Duh, me and my friends all went & got the implant together thanks Rio: Good Rio: babies don't fix anything Rio: especially not you Grace: I don't want any of my exes around that long, trust Rio: no more exes Rio: you know better than that Grace: Excuse me Grace: I'm not giving any new boys chances if it's gonna work out like Ash at the fair Rio: Boys are not the issue here either Rio: focus on yourself Grace: obvs Grace: that doesn't mean I wanna be constantly alone with myself Rio: of course not Rio: but you need to be comfortable with yourself when you are Rio: otherwise you'll be willing to surround yourself with anyone just so you aren't Grace: I thought we'd established that I am Grace: cue Janis' slut intervention Rio: You joke but tell me otherwise Grace: I'm sorry, who actually wants to be alone?? Grace: literally nobody ever so there's no need to target me Rio: Anyone who respects themselves would rather than be treated poorly Rio: that's the issue Rio: not that you want company, the company you're willing to accept and not know that you deserve better Grace: it's not my fault that decent teenage boys barely exist Rio: then wait Rio: you have options Grace: EW & do what 🙏🙏🙏? Rio: 🙄 Rio: If you're gonna be silly I've got to go now Grace: If you don't see that as ridiculous then yeah do go, hun Grace: I really would look & sound mental Rio: The only thing that's ridiculous is you would rather be treated like shit than to know and own your worth Rio: and you can blame the lads 'til you're blue in the face but it'll never change what happened and you will regret it, big time Rio: I would know Rio: and plenty of people don't have boyfriends at your age, at any age, respect that a fuck ton more than girls who are not ready rushing into bad situations because they feel left out somehow Grace: OMG like it's not bad enough that every boy at school wants to get with Janis over me, you want me to be like UM NO THANKS to any I can get Grace: nobody would respect that AT ALL they'd just think there's even more wrong with me Rio: exactly, in the grand scheme of things, they are nobody Rio: letting them dictate your behaviour will just leave you miserable because that's what they want Grace: if I leave school rn, sure Grace: but that isn't what you're saying I should do Grace: so that means years around these people Rio: I repeat, are you happy now Rio: is it working for you Grace: & I repeat, I can't change the way I look Grace: that's also years away Rio: that's the answer to nothing Rio: nothing I said and just nothing in general Grace: of course you'd think that Rio: It isn't Rio: you can change yourself beyond recognition but you'll never be satisfied with the results Grace: You've always been beautiful, you don't get to speak on it Rio: you're beautiful, Grace Grace: Don't even Grace: you literally sound like mum & dad now Rio: it's true Grace: it's embarrassing Grace: you call out all these lads for how they allegedly treat me, at least they don't lie about things like that Rio: it isn't a lie Rio: people use your insecurities against you for their gain Rio: those people don't love you like your family do, you choose to believe them, you're choosing to hate yourself Grace: Duh, I do that too Grace: like I said, babes, there's no beautiful personality either Rio: I'm fully aware, Grace, and I'm not the only one Rio: it's not just about looks, every bad thing you think about yourself, it's as clear as day for every predator that wants to take advantage Grace: okay great Grace: that makes me feel so much better Rio: yes, you need to make yourself feel better Rio: this conversation isn't here to make you feel better, no one is here to make you feel better Rio: nothing worth having is handed to you, you have to start working for it Grace: 👏THIS 👏 is 👏 who 👏I 👏 am Grace: so sorry if you don't like me Grace: I'm sure there'll be takers on the fam whatsapp to discuss that tho Rio: No, it isn't Rio: you're 15, you aren't the same person minute to minute Rio: and more importantly, these are unresolved mental health issues Grace: it makes no sense to label me if that's what you think Grace: so what's the thing here, am I just 15 or am I just mental? Rio: The thing is, Grace Rio: these issues didn't appear overnight, and they aren't going away any quicker Rio: you're talking of a lifetime of feeling ugly and stupid Rio: if you start addressing that, at 15, you stand a chance of seeing 30 Grace: I know, I've literally lived it thank you Rio: and if that's such a problem, stop Grace: stop stressing me out more!!! Rio: I'm sorry but you need it, you think you can go undetected doing the things you do and hope Janis or one of the others will always be doing something worse Rio: no, no one gets left behind Grace: they don't get left cos they leave Rio: they've not left Grace: Oh please Grace: reaching out now cos mum & dad made you doesn't mean you're here Grace: you literally said yourself that you can't be Rio: Good god, I'm nearly 23 Rio: did you expect me to stay in that house forever Rio: that isn't what happens, that doesn't mean we aren't family, that kind of feeling is what fucked it up in the first place Grace: &? nobody's ever at home but me & Gus or Diego somewhere Grace: I don't wanna stay here Grace: but I leave & suddenly it's the biggest drama ever Rio: Yes, because fact of that matter is you're 15 and that's where you need to be Rio: until you have somewhere of your own, somewhere better to be Rio: and you don't, now that's really sad, I'm sure but neither does anyone else your age Grace: Billie did, Janis does Rio: Billie should never have been allowed to go, and Janis isn't, either Rio: don't assume for a second she isn't getting the same talks Rio: and I'm doing all I can to talk to Billie but she's technically an adult now, she's got a baby, it's harder, much harder Grace: Can't I just come & live with you? You know I'm a really good babysitter Rio: I know you are Rio: but you need more attention, less responsibility Rio: it wouldn't be right Grace: Please, I promise I won't invite boys over EVER Rio: You know it'll be worse, right? Rio: we actually have rules at my house, routine Grace: I'm not Indie, I have a schedule Rio: I'm saying, even if I agreed to a short break for you, it wouldn't be Rio: you know full well you've got way more chance of mum and dad leaving you be Grace: maybe I don't want that Rio: if you're serious about this Rio: and I mean all of it Rio: not just the part where you get a break Rio: then I can talk to Buster Grace: Rio, I can't see a shrink rn, okay? Grace: talking about any of this is like Rio: I know Rio: okay, but we can start making the positive changes we can make, yes Rio: like I said, you're not stupid, you know what's good for you and what definitely isn't, more of the former, less of the latter, okay? Grace: I don't even really remember what I said to Janis or mum and dad when I was drunk and that still makes me wanna die Grace: Idk what to do but it isn't more of that Rio: We've all done that Rio: you will survive it Rio: couldn't have really said anything worse than you're in love with your cousin, can you, so I wouldn't worry Grace: I think I told Janis I love her & that's WAYYYY worse Rio: Loving your sister? Imagine that, I'd better find out an LBD for the wake Grace: I really REALLY miss you Grace: nobody else EVER wants to talk to me Rio: I miss you too Rio: we've all got to try to be better, alright Rio: it's by no means just you but you ain't exempt from my mumming, not sorry Grace: Yeah Grace: I think she's better, she never would have come to get me before that boy moved here Rio: I thought the same Rio: if Edie showed me anything, but she showed me a lot, it was that it is really, really hard to stop loving your family, Grace, even when you want to Grace: I know Grace: I miss everyone, even her Rio: I know, darling Rio: it's taking time, more time than we could've ever anticipated before but if we can all get to a place where we're all trying Rio: it's a start Grace: I don't ever wanna be older than her, it's too weird Rio: It is, but you will want it when you're there Rio: no one should be 16 forever Grace: I can't stop thinking about what Janis did either Rio: me either Rio: what do you really think of her boyfriend then Grace: he's really hot, everyone's lost themselves over him Grace: & them as a couple but ew Rio: thanks for updating me on the school ground goss, even though you clearly think I'm a grandma, you cheeky cow Rio: but I more meant do you think he enables her bad behaviour like Kai did Edie or Rio: though I have a hard time believing Janis could ever be as easily led, seen strangers things Grace: well babes if you wanna talk about my REAL trauma I've seen more of their PDA than I'll ever be comfortable with so Grace: & she smokes now which is GROSS Grace: but tbh he's not like that Rio: Hmm Rio: neither of those are exactly encouraging but not damning either Rio: say the jury is out on him for now but I'll be keeping an eye Grace: it's a good thing if someone she loves wants around though, yeah? Grace: maybe she won't run again Grace: *her Rio: yes and no Rio: short-term, sure Rio: but I don't need to tell you how much you wanna hide forever when it ends, do I Grace: idk I'm just saying I saw them at the fair & she was like ?? happy Grace: she said it was a sugar rush but I'm not stupid Grace: & he's got it SO BAD for her OMG Rio: That's cute Rio: and don't get me wrong, I want her to be happy, all of you Rio: I just know it doesn't immediately fix everything if she ain't also trying but maybe she is Rio: like you said, she did come to get you Grace: Yeah Grace: I didn't think she really would Rio: Any of us would Rio: you really can't just turn that stuff off Grace: she can, she has Rio: nah Grace: he's obvs turned her back on & I don't just mean cos he's the hottest white boy our school's had for ages, tho also obvs Rio: 😂 Rio: I won't ask for pics, feels a bit creepy Grace: [sends one anyway] Grace: not really your type, babes Rio: Oh, he is very cute Rio: and ha ha, if you think you can come up with any original joke for me, you can have at it but really decreases the chances of me making up the sofa for you any time soon Grace: no shade he's not my type either Rio: no? Grace: I would obvs hook up with him but I couldn't date him Grace: no way of that working he's too nice & too poor Rio: Grace Grace: ?? Rio: Not funny Grace: he is! I'm not even joking Grace: I'm too high maintenance for a boy like that Rio: You earn your own money then Rio: can't have things like money coming into it Grace: Duh, I will Rio: Good Grace: No boy's sticking around long enough to pay my bills, honey Grace: even if Janis thinks I'm selling myself now Rio: Not all it's cracked up to be Grace: I'll settle for a lot less, thanks to her, we all know Rio: Whatever she said, and I'm sure it was a lot Rio: you have to see her intentions were good Grace: her intentions were dramatic Grace: she can't ever stop being a bitch to me Grace: unless I'm blackout apparently Rio: that shows she had reason to be, no? Rio: not showing concern unless she has to Grace: I'm not saying it wasn't sketchy there Grace: that's why I asked her to come & not mum & dad Rio: how sketchy? Grace: like I was glad when I left Grace: & mum would've killed me Grace: or him Rio: Yeah Rio: I get you Rio: I'm just glad you're okay, but no more going off with people alone without telling someone, even if it's just your friends Rio: I know you think you know people, especially when you've hooked up with them and whatnot, but it's no real indicator Grace: yeah when a lad isn't really drinking but you are that's not a mood so obvs he's deleted 🙌🙌 Grace: I don't need the receipts Grace: be as much of a mess as me thank you Rio: 👍 Rio: what I like to hear Grace: I kept waiting for her to shout at me but she like didn't Rio: maybe she wants things to be different too Grace: There's no way though Grace: Mia is beyond extra about her dating the new boy Grace: she just won't let it go Rio: She liked him too? Grace: we all thought he was hot but idk it's like not about him, she can't deal that Janis finally said yes to someone Grace: has something Rio: It's best to not take sides Rio: but at the end of the day, they're different relationships, Mia will never be your sister Rio: and even if she does have issue with Janis, she shouldn't take that out on you, as a mate Grace: UM I wish you'd told me not to take sides before I threw her out of the house & made her hate me, babes Grace: 😱😱😱 Rio: why'd it come to that, like Grace: they were there too so she was just being THE WORST and would not stop Grace: like I don't wanna see them making out either but Rio: Sounds to me like she just needs to calm down Rio: what business is it of hers what Janis gets up to, really Grace: You literally have to let me stay with you 🙏 I'm so over it Rio: I'm asking, I promise Rio: I'll let you know asap Grace: 💜💜 ILYSM 💜💜 Grace: I get why Nancy moved schools now it's gonna be so annoying Rio: I love you too Rio: well she was really bullied but yeah Rio: fallings out always make it awkward Grace: it's not just Mia, everyone's like OBSESSED Grace: cos Janis finally lost her virginity & we still don't know literally anything about the new boy Grace: there's so many weird rumours Rio: your problem and your answer Rio: people always find new things to talk about soon enough Grace: 🤞🤞🙄🙄 Rio: I'm sure Janis isn't appreciating it very much either Grace: at least nobody's calling her a lesbian anymore Grace: she didn't appreciate that AT ALL Rio: being talked about is shit Rio: that's something we can all relate to Grace: 🤷 I tried to tell her there's way worse things to be called Grace: maybe when she has an ex she'll agree Rio: lies are always the worst, no matter if they're inherently insulting or not Rio: no one should get to dictate who you are Rio: let alone people who have no idea Grace: Yeah, I guess Grace: the truth hurts a lot too tho Grace: sometimes Rio: sometimes Rio: but you can always learn and grow from it Grace: idk hearing that someone thinks about you the way you do should be like this 🙌 yay 🙌 moment but it just never is Grace: it's just like 💔 Rio: when you don't like the truth, as you're seeing it now, it's always gonna hurt to hear it, even if it validates your worldview Rio: truth can be changed, is my point, lies stay lies Grace: okay yeah that makes sense Rio: oh, the kids just woken up from his nap Grace: laters then Rio: yes, I'll get back to you as soon as he replies Rio: 💛 Grace: he's so gonna leave you on read hun Rio: well that's charming Grace: you're literally the only one of us he likes Grace: if he can see my name before he opens it, there's no way Rio: very awkward if he can only muster like at this stage Rio: and give me some credit, not an amateur Grace: EW don't Rio: don't be silly, I'm married to and have kids with him Rio: you're coming over to OUR house, if you are Grace: exactly you're like so OLD! Rio: oh shut up Grace: it's like thinking about mum and dad Grace: so gross Rio: lead with all of this, shall I Rio: not selling yourself here Grace: if you wanna go in with screenshots, maybe pick the ones where I say ILY or something Grace: or send him a selfie of me crying Rio: how soft do you think he is 😏 Grace: duh Grace: boys are easy Rio: hmm Grace: go away 💜 Grace: I have a mum, it's time to be someone else's Rio: 👋 Grace: 💋

[punkscowardschampions]

Nancy & Rio

Nancy: You're with him right now, aren't you? Nancy: With how that convo just went you're gonna need to be Rio: Oh Rio: No, I'm actually at work but I can go back if I need to Nancy: It's me giving fair warning, it's up to you Rio: I don't know what to say Nancy: Me either Rio: This isn't how we wanted this to go down Rio: but I guess there's no speech that would prepare anyone, yeah? Nancy: Unlikely Nancy: You're the only ones who had any time to prepare and you're struggling, like Rio: It's just Rio: if it was anyone else, we wouldn't have to make this big thing of it, it feels awkward Rio: I know it isn't anyone else and that's the point but it doesn't take away from that feeling Nancy: Well, I'm glad you feel awkward too 'cause it's fucking weird Nancy: And he doesn't care at all so Rio: It's just hard for him to hear that Rio: it doesn't feel it Nancy: I literally don't understand this Nancy: You hate him Rio: Well Rio: I don't Rio: It's a headfuck, I know Nancy: Do you? Rio: Yeah Rio: This is why this is the last way we wanted this to come out Nancy: Like there's a better one Nancy: It's still Rio: You can say it, whatever you want Nancy: I've slagged him off to you so many times and the whole time you've Rio: It's not like I've been repeating it, I promise Nancy: That's not even the issue Nancy: God, this is so strange Rio: What is? Like, your main issues personally anyway Nancy: I don't have words for any of this Nancy: We grew up together, all of us, and then me and him drifted but it was okay 'cause so did you and him Nancy: You understood what he was like instead of falling under his spell like everyone else Rio: I still do Rio: I've not been fooled into thinking he's something he's not Rio: but yeah, I've seen other sides of him too Nancy: He told me why you two really stayed away from each other Nancy: So no you don't Rio: It's hard to explain Rio: it doesn't strictly mean I bought into all that Rio: and I did still see what you were saying, regardless Nancy: I don't get why you'd do this Nancy: You're so much better than it Rio: I know it's unconventional, and lots of people are going to have lots of opinions Rio: but I care less about how hard it might be because I love him more Nancy: I don't care that you're cousins, I care that he's him and you're you Rio: Like I said, I've seen different sides Rio: and you've got to admit, he's been getting better Nancy: You don't think I've seen every side? Nancy: That's how I know which one wins out Nancy: I love him too okay, but any change has come 'cause the Chloe thing scared him straight for a while Nancy: He doesn't know how not to revert to type Rio: It's just a different relationship Rio: no one is entirely themselves with any one person really Rio: he's not always been that, he wasn't before, he doesn't have to stay it Nancy: He's been a prick way longer than he wasn't and we both know it Nancy: Harsh but true Rio: He's got his reasons Rio: don't we all? Nancy: I don't want you to get hurt, alright? Rio: I know Rio: and without sounding disingenuous I am glad you care Rio: but it's too late to go back Rio: I don't want to Nancy: Gross Nancy: Don't give me any more details, like Rio: 'Course not Nancy: Did you really have to come for my parents entire relationship dynamic and repeat it with your own spin? Nancy: I'm joking but like also not Rio: I know Rio: the parallels were not lost on me Nancy: If you break up I'll have to move countries again Nancy: Lord knows what you'd have to do Rio: Yeah Rio: It is scary, not gonna lie Nancy: I literally can't and won't pick sides Rio: I'm not going to ask you to, can't promise he wouldn't but you know Rio: hoping it's not gonna come to that, call me an optimist Nancy: Okay that's cute Nancy: Don't make me a believer this fast, thanks Rio: Sorry, like Nancy: Can we like call him by a code name or something? Nancy: This is just Rio: Only 'cos I'm dying to hear your suggestions now Nancy: Don't make me laugh right now Rio: Soz again Rio: I promise I'm never going to come to you with the kinda info that'll have you wishing you were deaf Rio: Never have, 'cos ew boys, yeah? Nancy: I was literally gonna say Nancy: I'm too gay for that whoever it is Rio: Exactly Rio: I know it's going to be weird for a while for all the other reasons but aside from that, just another straight boy right Nancy: Yeah Nancy: Some of your exes have been even bigger pricks too, but don't tell him I said that Nancy: He'll take it as a trade up Rio: My lips are sealed Rio: Though if anyone's trying to deny that then they got bigger problems Nancy: I can't believe you've used those lips on him after how the first time went Nancy: I'm dead here Rio: He was like, what, 9 Rio: Again, the eternal optimist Rio: but hardly with how much he bragged on all his practice so Nancy: Don't Rio: My bad Nancy: Did you like him then? Nancy: When he was 9 I mean, not when he was bragging Rio: I mean Rio: Not to the degree we've been keeping the secret that long Rio: I guess I had a crush on him Rio: pass you the sick bucket, like Nancy: Lord Nancy: I know he did on you, he told me Nancy: Unprompted, which is another level of gross, thank you Nancy: It's like he was in the closet over this in place of me ever being Nancy: So dramatic, like Rio: I'll save my 'cute' for him, don't worry Rio: well you know, do anything for you, like Nancy: Can I come and see you? Nancy: Like I know it's gonna be so awkward in person probably and I wanna get it over with so we can just Rio: Of course Rio: I'd like that Nancy: I miss you Nancy: Even if you do have rubbish taste in boys Rio: I miss you too Rio: all of you Rio: but I don't miss being there, you know Nancy: I get it Nancy: I feel the same about London Rio: Yeah Rio: I thought you would Nancy: I know it's Drew and I really shouldn't expect him to be anything other than the worst but I can't believe he outed you like that Nancy: So fucked up Rio: Yeah, I really hoped he wouldn't but Rio: guess he had no reason not to now Nancy: But like did he ever? I don't understand why he waited Nancy: It must've given you so much false hope that he'd actually keep his mouth shut Nancy: That's cruel Rio: I guess 'cos he wanted to fuck me himself Rio: put it bluntly Rio: couldn't really be talking shit and doing it at the same time Nancy: That makes sense but why not tell everyone after the baby shower, you know Rio: Yeah, I don't know you know Rio: Buster reckoned maybe he was trying to keep Indie on-side a bit but Rio: that worked well for him Nancy: I don't want my brother to be right about anything right now but Nancy: Could be true, I guess Rio: Kinda makes sense Rio: or he just wanted to fuck with us with false hope and sense of security, like you said Rio: Idk, but I'm relieved in a way, like you said, when would ever be the 'right' moment? Nancy: I can relate, obviously not exactly Nancy: But when I finally kissed Sian after wanting to for such a long time it was like Nancy: Not the best example considering what happened after though Nancy: Try not to crash and burn, like Rio: Noted Rio: At least you had the balls to, good idea or not Rio: decidedly not but Rio: maybe we'd have never done it without being forced, idk Nancy: Buster would Nancy: It was obvious how much he wants to be with you Nancy: Gross too but Rio: Yeah Rio: I lowkey stopped him a few times but pretend I didn't admit that he'd only be annoying Nancy: Of course Nancy: I get it now, why he trashed his room that day Nancy: I never did get the real story out of him but it makes so much sense now Rio: That was more about the Chloe thing Nancy: Yeah? Nancy: Oh so he wasn't lying Rio: Don't sound too shocked Nancy: Compared to earlier I'm positively zen Rio: Ha, I have that affect Nancy: You calmed him down that day, didn't you? Nancy: Oh god Nancy: I'm gonna go ahead and repress Rio: Unless you wanna rephrase, probably for the best Nancy: I need you to tell me the safe zones of both our houses so I can exist in there only Nancy: But I also don't wanna know Rio: ... Rio: I dunno if you want me to stay silent or if that says too much Nancy: Please tell me my room was off limits Nancy: I will die Rio: Of course Rio: Not a total animal Nancy: I'm too relieved to argue the pros and cons of what you just said so Rio: 🤐 Nancy: There is one thing I HAVE to ask though Rio: Go on Rio: Slightly concerned but Nancy: Don't worry I'm rolling my eyes at myself Nancy: But be nice to him, yeah? 'Cause I can't but like he's never been in love before Rio: I promise Nancy: He acts tough but I could take him easily Nancy: Especially with things like this Rio: I know Rio: let's not start singing no stranger to heartache though, yeah? Nancy: All I'm saying is, if what happened to me happened to him there'd be nobody left alive Nancy: He's the most dramatic McKenna there is Nancy: Worse than dad and nan put together Rio: I mean, not gonna argue Rio: you are handling it really well, you know Rio: even if you still feel the same mess now as you did then, it doesn't show Nancy: You're the only person who's said anything close to that to me Nancy: So thanks Rio: This family is just shit at talking to each other Rio: not coming for them 'cos well Nancy: I feel like mum is never gonna look at me like she used to Nancy: not to come for Buster's dramatic flair but Rio: I know Rio: She will, she's pretty good Rio: Assume Buster told you she worked it out Nancy: Yeah Nancy: I'd be more shocked if she hadn't 'cause of course Nancy: It's just she's never treated me like I'm stupid before, you know, not with the dyslexia stuff or any of it, but that was before this Rio: Feelings aren't logical though Rio: I reckon she's stinging that SHE didn't know, you know Rio: not for the 'I told you so' or anything but so she could've helped you deal Nancy: I don't know whether to be flattered or horrified that I'm better at keeping secrets than you and him combined Rio: Using all that closet angst you never got to, obviously Nancy: Which reminds me, I can't help wishing Chloe knew about this 'cause of how angry she'd be Rio: I have good news Nancy: REALLY? Nancy: did everyone know but me or what, like? Rio: awks 😬 Rio: but no, her obsession worked to her advantage and she was able to piece together us being at the same place enough times Nancy: Her and mum getting jackets now Nancy: Sorry Drew you missed your chance Rio: Honestly Rio: He did not put the effort in Rio: won't tell you the full deets 'cos you won't wanna know Nancy: umm? Rio: We'll leave it at he may as well have walked in it was that blatant Nancy: OH Nancy: oh my god have you and him ever....when I was there? Rio: Gurl Rio: don't ask Nancy: RIO I KNOW THAT MEANS YES Rio: Shh Nancy: That's despicable Rio: Well that's a bit steep Rio: it's hardly a war crime Nancy: I'm calling it a hate crime Nancy: I can Nancy: I'm gay Rio: 😂 Rio: You clearly didn't hear anything so count yourself lucky Nancy: Please I just assumed it was another posh blonde if I did Nancy: Been there, done my best to ignore that Rio: With this accent? I think not Rio: I was stealth Nancy: I didn't have a glass to the wall sounding out how you said vowels Rio: Trust, you'd know Nancy: CAN YOU NOT Rio: You brought it up! Rio: I'm not trying air my business or his Nancy: I have to go find some ground to swallow me brb Rio: 😏 okay babe Nancy: how is that a euphemism? Rio: idk, your mind, honestly woman Nancy: can you at least promise to keep your hands off each other when I visit or not? Rio: We managed this far, I think we'll be fine Rio: not PDA all the way from here on out, like Nancy: Okay Rio: Thanks, Nance Nancy: For what? Rio: For still being normal with me Nancy: If it was abnormal to fancy Buster I'd be too busy judging half the female population to even speak to you Nancy: Besides, I'm saving my big reinvention for when uni starts, like you said Rio: Yeah? Is that warning me to expect my shade and silent treatment in the post, like? Nancy: Maybe Nancy: Depends what you do between now and then Nancy: You can't see my hair flip but its happening Rio: Oh God, don't become Chloe, like Rio: a misstep if ever there was one Nancy: 😱 Rio: You know, don't be THAT mad I'm with Buster, not goals Nancy: Wash your mouth out Rio: I'm sorry but you never gave me a codename Nancy: That Prick ™️ Nancy: But I meant the comparison between me and her Nancy: That was a deep cut Rio: Yeah, she wishes Nancy: If she tries to date me next just know I predicted it Rio: I'll pray for you Nancy: Such an unholy union what else is there to do? Nancy: I love you but I'm not taking the heat off you that way, like Rio: Not to be that bitch but Rio: kinda owe me twofold now so Rio: tick tock Nancy: BITCH NO Nancy: I also draw the line at boudoir photography Rio: Damn 😂 Nancy: I'll recommend you someone Nancy: They won't be as good obviously Rio: 'Course not Rio: I know my own angles, it's cool Nancy: And nobody loves himself more than him so he's bound to as well Rio: I mean, his feed is pretty poppin' Nancy: 🙄 Rio: 😂 that was just a normal compliment Nancy: How did I not know you're so disgustingly in love? My god Rio: Gay drama, probably Nancy: Sad but true Rio: At least you've got an excuse Rio: everyone else needs a word Nancy: Honestly Rio: Though I'm cool with most of mine skillfully avoiding 'cos I don't need to do this 10x over Nancy: oh no Nancy: imagine Rio: Lucky only some of them are highkey Rio: that's enough Nancy: Yeah Nancy: not that I can say anything 'cause about to excuse myself to cry over my brother having a girlfriend when I don't Rio: Awh babe Rio: wanna hit the town when you come? Nancy: To drink, definitely Nancy: anything else with my track record is a no Rio: Your track record of 1 1/2? Rio: Come to me when you've got at least half a dozen failures, like Nancy: You don't think that's enough mistakes to be making? Rio: Nah Rio: Need I remind you your track record with drinking is not flawless either Rio: but you gotta live, babe Nancy: I'm scared, okay? Rio: That's alright Rio: they won't bite 'less you ask Nancy: 😂 Nancy: What if I'm not ready, I don't wanna fuck anyone over again Rio: It's just the club Rio: harmless, meaningless flirting is the standard Nancy: Yeah? Nancy: Will you actually come with me? Rio: 'Course Nancy: Despite Buster's coffee shop masterclass, which feels like a million years ago anyway, I don't really know what I'm doing Rio: I can show you Rio: but you gotta do it how you would, you know, you can't go too hard with an act Nancy: 🙈 Rio: It'll be fun, been ages since I flirted with a girl Nancy: Don't tell my brother that he'll get bored 😂🙄 Nancy: Help me though I need it Rio: No danger, trust Rio: I will, bring outfit options Nancy: Obviously Nancy: When are we doing this? Nancy: In typical lesbian fashion I need to angst for like 4 years prior Rio: Whenever you can get over Rio: I work most nights but I've got plenty time banked so it won't hurt Nancy: Let's make it happen soon Nancy: Everyone's doing my head in here Rio: Whenever you want, babe Rio: your brother is only as busy as usual so Nancy: Is next weekend too highkey? Rio: Nah, sounds good to me Nancy: Okay Nancy: Anything 🍀 you're missing let me know and I'll pack that too Rio: Just some decent tea, tah Nancy: That ain't even London that's just our house Nancy: Full offense mum Rio: 😂 the real beef comes out Nancy: You missed a chance to say the real tea Nancy: Come on Rio: Damn Rio: really let myself down, like Nancy: mhmm Rio: Ah well, what can ya do Nancy: Do you think if I ask your mum to cat sit while I'm there I'll ever see her again? Rio: Your Ma or the cat? Nancy: Either or Rio: I don't think she's that cold Rio: but one of mine would defs go in and give her TLC Rio: the cat, that is Nancy: 😂 Nancy: I'll text you when my flight's booked then Rio: 👍 See you then babe Nancy: Until then, remember I loved you first 💋 Rio: 😂 Love you too silly bitch

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Buster

Rio: Didn't say you had a girlfriend Rio: but you can tell her she's hitting me up with the back off too late and under fucked up misunderstanding, like 😂 Buster: Didn't say it 'cause I don't Buster: If some girl wishes that's her problem Buster: And yours now like 😂 Rio: It ain't funny, blowing up my phone making me look suspect, like Rio: anyway, Nance gave me the lowdown already so I know she's a cunt so I don't have to hold back Buster: Who's laughing? Buster: Send her my way if she's that desperate Buster: The lads are boring like Rio: Seriously? Rio: No I will Rio: if you're gonna do your own like that you can sort it yourself, not her pimp Rio: not* Buster: Whatever Rio: It so isn't but that's on you Rio: Are you lot out tonight then? Buster: Course Buster: You think I'm waiting at home for you, babe? Rio: Har dee har Rio: sounds like you had a cosy night in in mind tbf Rio: where you going then, wanna meet up? Buster: Not got the light or kettle on like Buster: Sick of the lad already? Rio: Yeah, what you had in mind Rio: Nah, but 2 ain't a party Rio: and I'm going home tomorrow so Buster: Wanna see if he can hang Buster: Fair Buster: I'll bring the party to you then, babe Rio: Pretty much Rio: You're feeling chipper today Buster: I'll insult you when I get there if you really want Rio: Not my kink Rio: would get us back to the status quo though Buster: Just buzzing 'cause you're off home and outta my way like Buster: Can't blame me Rio: I bet Buster: Not looking forward to kicking it in your own ends any more or what? Buster: I know you'll miss me but come on Rio: Nah but it ain't gonna be all fun and games when I get back is it Rio: Shit to sort Rio: but gotta be done Rio: and you wish Rio: I got reason to come back and annoy you some more now Buster: You're not gonna get grounded Buster: Don't worry about it Buster: And I know, kid Buster: Always making it obvious, Cavante Rio: Don't be daft Rio: I've gotta look out for Nance Rio: avoid another ex Rio: all that drama Rio: You're OBVIOUSLY deranged, McKenna Buster: You're used to all that shit many times over Buster: You got this, ma Rio: Shut up! 😂 Rio: Doesn't mean I don't get tired of it Buster: It ain't my fault you've had more exes than I've had fam dinners Buster: Not even starting on family bullshit of yours Buster: Well I'll sort you a decent line when I get there, put a pep back in your step, yeah? Rio: Yeah it is Rio: No show, you are Rio: and bet you've had more, just 'cos you ain't claiming 'em Rio: Go for it Buster: Fuck off I'm being nice here Buster: Trying to give you a proper going away and you're trying to fight me Rio: 🤷 Rio: Soz Rio: Only way I know how, clearly, all those exes, like Buster: What's wrong, babe? I know you ain't gonna miss me that bad so what is it? Rio: You shouldn't fuck Chloe Rio: Idk, you shouldn't have put that in my head Buster: I haven't Buster: She's not my type. I know what you reckon but I do have some standards Rio: Alright, good Rio: Too many lines already, I'm paranoid Rio: she's bad news Buster: Come get some fresh air with me then Buster: Plenty of people say that about me, like. Not that I'm trying to make a connection to her. Fuck that Rio: Might help Rio: Thought you were with your boys though Rio: Yeah but, at least you're upfront about what you are, good or bad Rio: 🐍 Buster: They'll be fine if I don't hold their hands through every song, babe Buster: She's really got to you, yeah? Rio: I'm just being dramatic, too many strangers here Rio: but she did a number on Nancy, that I know for facts, stand by the bad vibes even if I could relax on it rn Buster: Where are you, specifics. I'm come and get you if you ain't coming out Buster: Find those cunts later Rio: Idk, ages away from yours Rio: we're meant to be but the pre-party still going strong Rio: I'll meet you somewhere? Buster: Keep your phone on, I'll be that stalker and work out where you are Buster: Meet you near Rio: Not just a pretty face, ladies and gents Rio: It's alright, just pick a club, no need to ruin the night Buster: At least you're finally admitting how hot I am Rio: 🙄 Really needing the ego boost, yeah? Sure 👌😂 Buster: Find you in The Grand, yeah? Rio: Got it Buster: Half an hour max Rio: Cool, I'm nearer than you so I'll see you in there Rio: *He'd obviously been offended she wanted to leave the party and get a headstart on him on the town, but it was way too soon to show it (thank fuck) and still save face, so she got out without much pouting and whining. Only needed to take one bus, turns out she was about five minutes down the road from Clapham, tops; good to know. Maybe that was why she was feeling so out of it? Not knowing where she was, and who with? Been in that scenario before though and she'd not got this rattled so- blatant bullshit. Rio didn't plan on admitting it to him, but it had way more to do with Buster McKenna than was healthy. Head fuck.  This is why they avoided each other, and had for a while now. It weren't no good trying to just be nice to each other, always went too far. And arguing and being cunts didn't exactly cool the energy between 'em either. No, ignoring each other's existence was key. And yet here she was, going out to party with him. Well fucking done, girl. She rolled her eyes at herself, jogging up and down on the spot impatiently, near enough to the front of the club's queue now she needed to remember to look her hottest so they'd let her in faster. And result. She was in, no coat to put up, so she was away. Barstool, 'round of vodka shots, sorted. Toes tapping, faster than the beat of this shit tune. It was pretty early still, the club only now filling up. Shouldn't have an issue finding her. Not that it was a good idea but finish what they'd started now, like.* Buster: *The lads had been chilling at his since the afternoon doing fuck all of much but getting on his nerves, and when Barnaby suggested getting the drinks in and making something of the night he wasn't even the most relieved of the lot of them, like, so face saved there. Nice one, lad. It was the first decent favor any of them had done him in Christ knows how long, not that he was letting it show. Not a fucking amateur at that either, cheers. There was a girl he'd swiped that was why he was keen to be off. No other reason that they'd had to be privy to. James had been chatting about his cousin since he got with her and Buster wasn't trying to add to that conversation. They didn't know what they were fucking saying anyway. Silly pricks. Let them wonder and speculate over his antics tonight with the Tinder blonde, or any other, they loved it. He had his own mind full of bullshit that he personally didn't love. Worry was a new emotion regarding Rio, one that he didn't feel confident over dealing with, and a lack of confidence was even newer territory than giving a shit about Cavante's emotions. Or so he told himself before he racked up the lines to turn all that off for a while. Worked out proper well for him that had, here he was off and running to cheer her up or what the fuck ever. What was his fucking goal meant to be? Soft cunt. Gonna send her goodnight texts later or what, like? Stupid. Get real all he was gonna do was buy her some watered down drinks for as long as she let him. Big fucking deal and no great help. Still, as soon as he was in he took the stool next to her and did exactly that, ordering more of what she already had.* Rio: *And just like that, he was there by her side. As if this was all standard and they did it all the time. This week maybe but neither of them should get too fucking cosy with the idea, like. She took her share of the drinks without protest, even though she had nothing but empties to offer by the time he arrived. * Next round, like. *She shrugged, spinning the nearest shot glass aimlessly, avoiding eye contact She then spun herself to face the dance floor, like she was surveying the talent from her perch on high. This was fucking ridiculous. He'd be saying as much if she didn't act fast. Jumping up, the tunes still not there but she'd have to make do. As she weaved her way through the crowds, she took a second to break the rules and make eye contact, looking back at him and motioning with a question of 'are you coming?' hanging in the air.* Buster: *He wasn't listening to her 'cause that's how focused he had to be on not staring at her. She looked so fucking good. He'd said as much the other day, believing it when he did, but this was different. He felt it bones deep and more crucially, didn't know how not to show he was being affected. Fuck's sake. No more coke for him until he got his shit together like. Sort your head out, you twat. He shook it, playing as if he was shrugging off her offer to pay 'cause it was better she reckoned he was trying to buy her off again than- What? For the second time tonight he was already asking himself what the fuck he was trying to achieve. Shit. At least before he could chat any more nonsense to himself, or her, Rio was up and away. Not far enough given how easy dancing made it to be close, like, but a reprieve he could count in seconds. Breaths to take. Buster should've known in the next minute she'd steal it all off him with a look. Course. It was an old game. And he'd never once played by the rules, had he? It was too late to start now. He wasn't no choir boy and she was leaving in the morning she'd said. Fuck it. Not a fucking amateur, remember? He'd call her bluff and cheer her up before this shit tune was done. It was just dancing, who the hell was he if he couldn't handle that, yeah? Rio: *Again, screaming internally, asking what the fuck she thought she was doing and why the hell she was doint it; All the while making no effort to slow down, never mind stop. So glad he couldn't read her as well as he claimed, the fucking laugh he'd have about how much she was silently protesting (much too much for it to be anything but mortifying; and very bloody telling). Still, she knew the feeling of eyes lingering on her body well enough by now to know that's what was happening, what he was doing, despite himself. Despite herself, and what a good, sensible girl should do, she smirked, smug satisfaction at taking the lead in both senses. Fuck it, she could say it was the coke making her act up. If he was feeling brave enough in his own good behaviour to question it after. Not likely. So why not? She wanted this right now, so she was going for it. Whatever 'it' was. Stop thinking. Let your body takeover completely. With that in mind, or out of it, she began to move, getting closer to him than was necessary, routine full of 'almost' contact, designed to tease.* Buster: *The song was still shit but he wasn't listening to it either now. Couldn't hear anything but the sound of two heartbeats, his thumping enough to be shaming if he gave a fuck about anything other than getting closer than she already was to him, and hers once he was, echoing such a similar beat. There was smugness in having her rhythm there alongside the intrusion of his, literally hammering away at her pretense of utter control too. Loud and clear for him, drowning out everything that had been said before. Bullshit. Necessary but still ridiculous to look back on from where they were now. Nice try, Cavante, 'cause guess what, I know you are, babe. He wore a smirk to match hers, letting his 'routine' in turn spell out that the teasing shit had gone on long enough, while the hand which had settled on her waist as he moved pulled her body into his. He'd snorted his fair share of lines if he needed something to blame it on other than just being fucking over it and wanting to play a new game and it was unlikely she was gonna challenge him at this point. Hardly blameless herself, yeah? Whatever.* Rio: *She looks down at where his hand has ended up, eyes traveling back up to meet his, slowly, appreciating his body as she did so, letting him know she knew it was anything but a happy accident, but that she wasn't going to say anything either way. Hardly could now, could she? A silent deal being made on the floor tonight. 'This stays between us.' It didn't mean anything, like. Just sexual attraction, however fucked. She wouldn't hold it against his character if he didn't against hers. What happened in the club, like. Such a fucking cliche, Christ; but she felt like being one just this once if it felt this good. She had her back towards him now, winding up and down, hips clashing, making her ache. Before Rio could stop herself (a reoccurring theme of her time with him, it seemed), she had placed her hands over his, still on her waist, and was moving them down, to where she wanted them right now. Fuck. He was definitely going to pull away now, probably have some choice words for how sick and creepy and wrong she was and she didn't have a leg to stand on, no case to fight. Before he could, thinking fast (hopefully faster than he could), she pulls gently on his neck, so she can reach his ear to shout into it, shit tunes always being played too loud.* You promised me a line. Buster: *He shouldn't be this turned on by a few dance moves and unwavering eye contact but he is and there was no way she couldn't know, bodies pressed against each other as tightly as they were. Fucking hell. Yeah, he could lie to himself that it was the fault of the rich, white girls he usually approached not knowing how to dance without doing shit imitations of their current favorite pop icon or being too eager to check him out (sizing him up the same as he did them) to hold his gaze, but that's all it'd be, more bullshit when he'd already said no more.  It was too fucking obvious what this was about and what he wanted. And every movement of hers was as telling. None more so than when she stopped herself, 'cause it was forced in a way that none of their other actions had been, thought out instead of fluid. Of course, immediately after came a brief moment when he reckoned she was gonna nibble on his earlobe or something. No going back then, like, but he should've realised the headfuck was gonna come from a more familiar (as far as Rio Cavante was concerned) direction. Christ. When was the last time another girl had left him wanting more, this much and this soon? Buster couldn't remember. Couldn't think.  State of him.  At least her pulling away to speak let him breathe. He smirked again, faking regaining more composure than he had around her as standard, never mind on a night like this. Nodding his head in the direction of the toilets briefly, he leaned in to reply. * Come on, let's get you sorted. Rio: *She took him by the hand, pulling him through the crowd with an impatience they could both pretend was about coke. Yeah, right. Neither of 'em was fooled or in the mood for fooling now. Her mind had been fully made up for her when his reaction of outrage, disgust, and horror hadn't come; but the opposite had, the hardness she felt tight against her mirroring the ache she felt, less obvious outwardly but, was it though? He knew. She knew he knew so time to do something about it, boy! Now or never, like. Door swinging behind 'em, pulling him into the first free cubicle, reaching behind his frame to lock up, purposely trailing her hand against his exposed forearm, outstretched fingers softly trailing along the veins there, taut between ample muscle and goosebumped skin. Fucking hell. It wasn't her fault he was so god damn attractive. Regret it in the morning. She'd be long gone by then. Breaking eye contact away from where it had fallen below the belt (oops), she grinned, green meeting blue, breathing as laboured as heart.* Go on then... Buster: *The last thing he should have done was followed her into a space where every time his body shifted (however fucking subtly. Or not) it brushed somehow against hers, bringing them back to teasing each other, 'cause unless he pushed her fully against the cubicle wall there was no way to create the blatant friction they both craved, and he wasn't about to do that. Not yet. If she wanted coke, she was gonna have it. Simple as. Just as well that act was though, distracted as he'd become, like. If Buster let himself look back on any of tonight (not wise but nevertheless still likely) he'd pat himself on the back for once again not being a fucking amateur, fine chopping the lines on his coffee table before he came out so all that was left was to unwrap that shit, lay hers out and roll up a note. He'd been on autopilot getting the drugs from his pocket, breathing ragged as hers, the feeling of her stare (and where it was purposefully aimed) leaving him incapable of coherent thought about anything else. Fuck. He wanted her so bad. His own eyes fixed on the locked door, checking and rechecking, focused solely on trying to do that until the memory of her touching his arm resurfaced and then all he could think of was the idea that formed. He smirked for...what a third time? ... Christ knows, before laying her coke out on another, higher patch of exposed skin, eyebrow raised, wordlessly asking Rio how badly she wanted her share now.* Rio: *And there it was. Another silent challenge, a dare. No need for fucking words creating any unwanted space between them, made her wonder why they'd ever bothered when this was so, SO much better. No comparison. Of course, the answer was they bothered so they didn't end up here but she wasn't listening to sense tonight, fuck off. Right now, she WANTED to be here, nowhere else she'd rather, frankly. Fret over it later, like. Or not. It felt TOO damn right to call it wrong. So she wouldn't. And he wouldn't. And no one else need ever know. She wants to hesitate, knows she should. Eyebrows raising to make some display of being all 'really?', like she's so scandalized or not into it, only doing it 'cos she couldn't refuse a dare, could she? But Rio Cavante didn't even flinch, crashing into him full force, pushing him against the door, arms wrapped around his neck to steady herself, steady them both. This close, the heat of him unbearably sexy, his body was so toned and fucking perfect, Christ! She felt dizzy with it, sweat was slicking the white powder to his naked skin, collar bone a natural shelf to hold it. The temptation to lick it off him like salt for a tequila shot was almost too much but she didn't want to be accused of wasting the coke, so she pressed her nose into him, snorting it with ease, shuddering more from the sensation of being this close than anything else, tipping her head back in pleasure, hoping he didn't hear the small moan than found its way out.* Fuck! *Snapping her head back, rubbing her nose with a sniff, damn. Okay. She obviously had to one-up him. What else was a girl to do, yeah? She moved away, to the bag still laid out on the top of the loo, grabbing it 'fore he had a chance to stop her or do anything else to drive her crazy. Shit, she had to take back some control, like! She smirked back at him, the solution to her problem of how to best Buster McKenna becoming obvious as she looked down. Racking it up on her ample cleavage, as if to say, triple dog dare you, McKenna* Buster: *There was half a second as his shoulder blades hit the door, rattling the hinges with the force of their bodies colliding again, closer than they'd been yet somehow but still, at the same time - impossibly- not enough, that he wanted to tell her 'fuck the coke' or something like it. Swore he could almost feel the words tumbling out, begging practically for her to just fucking kiss him instead. But he didn't. Or make a move to himself either. As soon as he heard her moan he knew why, even though they'd waited years and his entire body was insisting that he couldn't any more, refusing in the form of his own shudders as he stood there, knees weak from barely any contact. Fuck's sake. There was so much promise in that sound that Buster grinned, holding her gaze with baited breath until she gave his eyes no choice but to travel with her, settling exactly where she planned for them to. * Oh fuck. *If she said anything about him stealing the words out of her mouth later (not that they could chat about any of this casually) he'd deny it, not realising an echo had escaped from him as he launched himself towards her, lifting her slightly so she rose to meet his bowed head easily. Finally Rio's back landed hard (thankfully against wood same as his had rather than cold, dirty porcelain) with force enough that she'd feel it tomorrow. He wanted that more than anything, even as his line disappeared, snorted all too soon. Fuck her trying to pretend she didn't remember, if her mind pulled that shit her body would call her a liar. He'd made sure of that, like. There was always more he could do though, and he didn't hesitate to put his mouth on the skin she'd already offered him, kisses desperately hard and bruising as his hands trailed lightly down her body, skimming each curve more brazenly than he'd ever looked her up and down before. Christ that seemed like a lifetime ago, her beckoning him onto the dance floor. Not that it mattered. Too much had happened to go back now and there was well more than he needed to happen still.* Rio: *Her cries, a mixture of pleasure and pain as she was unceremoniously slammed into the wall, caught in her throat. Like she couldn't express how much she wanted this, NEEDED this. And she couldn't. No moaning or dirty talk was going to cut it but she could but try. Knowing he knew regardless, and that he felt it too, only amped it up further.* You want me so bad, huh?* Stating the obvious for her own satisfaction, no question mark needed. Muffled curses at him; warning him if he dared stop, to do more, worse, faster, harder, NOW; acting as their version of pillow talk. Pulling his hair, novelty of being above him in the literal. Rio found purchase, sitting atop the toilet, kicking the seat down so he could kneel as she spread her legs for him, pushing his head down, showing him where she needed him.* Please, Buster, please... *She didn't care that this was a club bathroom, that people could definitely hear them, that they'd be hearing a lot more soon if she had anything to do with it. That he was her fucking cousin. Fuck. She just did not care about anything but having him touch her, fuck her. But before he could, there was a monstrous bang on the door that rattled the hinges harder than they had only a few minutes previous.* Shit! Legs clamping shut, jumping down from the seat, pocketing the drugs in her bra without hesitation, she clambered over him, pushing him back, so he was sat down.* I got this, yeah? Worry about yourself. Catch you later... *Rio murmured, squeezing his hand in the hope he'd fucking listen to her, not trusting a coked out McKenna to deal with what was clearly a bouncer and not just a punter desperate for a piss, like. She squeezed out of the smallest possible gap in the door, shutting it behind her, so Buster wasn't spotted.* Buster: *Fuck me. *Holy shit, every word out of her mouth was fucking him up but it was the begging that REALLY sent him over and made him use a phrase that was ridiculously literal. He couldn't help it, knowing that she wanted him bad enough to say that shit out loud what he hadn't when the coke first came out, made more than his knees go weak. He was about to insist that she told him what she wanted again, just to hear it, biting his lip to prevent a moan from coming out before the sentence did when something makes everything stop. It turned his wants back to fantasy, yet again becoming a scenario that wouldn't happen. 'Cause he isn't stupid. As much as many other parts of him were desperate to ignore the pounding on the door, his head, coked out as it is, still knows that they can't. The hired muscle out there wouldn't let them. Shit. It was somehow the unrealest part of this, fucked up as that sounded even to no other ears but his own, that this was how the night was going to end, not how he'd finally let himself want it to. They'd both given in, fully, and there was no pretending at this point (whatever he might convince himself of later, dismissing the night as a weird headfuck etc etc) the drugs were why he wanted her so badly. And worse, all they were now were the reason why he couldn't have her. Fuck's sake. Buster hadn't felt a surge of anger overwhelm him this utterly -suddenly too- since his sister left. Wherever he looked was flooded red, and for Rio's frantic movement, the only thing he managed to do was bite his tongue and clench his fists. Until she'd gone and then he stood up, immediately pacing (an agitated cokehead cliche) the cubicle transformed into a cage he didn't dare leave in this state. Just as well 'cause the next second had him striking out, kicking out hard at the space where their bodies had been, with as much power as he felt had been robbed from him. The wood protested one last time, drowning every sound in his head out with the crash, thank fuck. The cubicle didn't fall to pieces, of fucking course, 'cause it was another thing he needed to happen and he sank back onto the toilet seat, taking shallow breaths.*