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#like it would be his first actual hatefuck and he would literally hurt him and be too rough and not stop even when told to <- and then they
dirt-str1der · 1 year
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Kiryu would literally hate meeting any alternate version of himself like he spends all his time pretending like his body doesnt exist in the third dimension , if he sees a doppelganger he would be like oh ha ha another copycat and then when he realises no. Thats literally another instance of himself he would get so scared and when he gets scared he gets pissed off and he would be unable to stand this other him
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deadrlngers · 1 year
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can you spare Violante/Gortash lore? (I will take literally ANYTHING)
holding your hand so gently rn as i type this, ily thanks for the ask!! i'm going to try and give the shortest (failed a bit, sorry) backstory lore dump here about what was going on between them and Vio's bestie before the game events since i never spoke of it
Violante is actually born and raised in waterdeep, she meets Gortash by pure chance during some big fancy event in baldur's gate where she's (forced) to attend by her mother. Ruven who's her drow bestie 4 life and death is there as well and the circumstances of their first meeting with Gortash is actually funny. He shows up fashionably late at the party, spots these two almost tearing each other throat out in a quarrel and decided to jump in just to make fun of them and how 'they truly let anyone in these days' (Vio is a fallen noble, Ruven a bastard of big house devir, they hold almost zero importance in the big picture of nobility and their power) but at the same time he has the balls to ask Vio on the first dance of the night, he does it to anger Ruven really and Vio accepts just to make Ruven's blood boil a lil bit. tear the drow apart girlies
they should've been just the amusement of the night, a stunt for fun, but Gortash ends up meeting them a few more times during Vio's stay in baldur's gate. thing is, they don't actually hold any importance to his eyes nor any plan, they are nobles he can't get anything from, yet he notices something about the dynamic between them (toxic, codependent, ready to hurt one another as a form of love, Vio follows Ruven like a lost puppy but still is the one to have him on a leash under her power) and he decides he finds them..entertaining and who cares after all? they aren't even baldurians so he could fuck around and hopefully not find out without any big repercussion since they would be gone for waterdeep sooner than later. Gortash rather cunningly enters the dynamic, he plays with the clear possessive obsession that Vio & Ruven have. Violante is indeed the weak spot so his attack is lead through her, Ruven is a great manipulator and just as cunning so he has this subtle hate for Gortash as he has it for Ruven (they hatefuck, thank u) while Vio just wants to see her drow bestie suffer and it's clear that she can achieve that if Gortash is involved BUT Ruven can't let her see he's actually bothered by her interest in Gortash or he'd let her win. Basically you have these three idiots using each other and fucking nasty while they are at it.
something none of them foresee is that they end up enjoying each other presence far more than what was planned, Violante in particular (since she basically lived closed in her manor most of her life bc of a very toxic mother) finds the new company a breath of fresh air and Gortash does enjoy having a quite stimulating conversationalist in Violante. But everything was going to end anyway, right? a short lived fling they all had fun with. Vio and Ruven go back to waterdeep and Gortash simply keeps living his life.
a few years later tho Violante and Gortash meet again in baldur's gate, this happens right after Vio killed Ruven (ops) and the shock of it all plus the power she achived by becoming a warlock, makes her flee waterdeep. she won't admit it but she actually wanted to meet Gortash, that's why she went to baldur's gate, in her mind he's what little connection she has left with her dead bestie. She tells him Ruven his dead and nothing more, Gortash is way too clever to not realise she's the one that killed him but he says nothing, he finds the event interesting..and maybe beneficial for his future plans (sick and twisted woman to use as a pawn but also..an unsettling feeling of.. happiness.. to have met her again). but this doesn't last as well, a few days later after she found some ahem ahem comfort in Gortash, she leaves without saying a word. they meet again during canon game events and i'm pretty sure i'm making her side with him but for that..i'm still planning and thinking hehe and truly i've talked WAY TOO MUCH NOW
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stephaniedola · 7 months
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FUCK im late anyway also for file my beloved: alone bound ;) hate skin
I LOVE U i knew youd give me the good good
alone: How does your OC deal with loneliness? Have they ever been completely alone before? How do they act when there's no one around to see them?
oooh this is a good one.... SHAPEFILE grew up in a lab surrounded by scientists constantly observing him, and although he doesnt remember much about it, he definitely has an ingrained sense of feeling weird on his own. i think he probably finds being alone and undistracted very perturbing. if hes alone, hes probably doing GIS stuff and/or homework.
otherwise i feel like they fill their life with various odd characters to amuse them and keep them from feeling lonely. not that they'd admit that, and not that it would show based on how they treat people
really, when FILEs alone i feel like FILE just goes full autism mode. stim city. maybe those untapped traumas memories from FILEs childhood start to seep in... who knows
bound: Has your OC ever been imprisoned or captured? What happened? How did they get out? Did the experience leave any scars?
FILE was pretty much kept imprisoned for the first 13 years of his life, which, again, he does not remember but still has lingering emotional scars from. as for what happened, he has no way of knowing, but hes fairly certain it was bad. part of why he doesn't think too deeply about his issues and hates being alone with his thoughts is because of the weird triggers and fetishes he has that he can't place the origin of. its just NULL data. he does have scars, all over his body, but he was told they were all part of the process of creating him. frankenstein lookin ass.
they only got out by waking up age 13 (so they're told) with no memories, being told who they were (supposed to be?) and being assigned an adoptive family.
hate: What does your OC hate? Why? How do they act towards the object of their hatred?
the funnier and less twisted answer to this question is open source software. they fight constantly with Quin, the local naturalist dyke, who insists that Esri software (again, FILE believes they were literally created to shill this stuff) sucks and that proprietary software shouldnt exist. also, they hatefuck
as for the real answer, it's FILEs second thesis advisor (dont worry about what happened to the first one) Dr. Tan, who has taken an unfortunate liking to FILE, with whom FILE has a deeply questionable relationship FILE has very weird feelings about. FILE knows their dynamic is abusive but FILE feels like FILE brings it upon FILEself by being, on some level, into it.
when Tan's around in public, FILE gets very closed off and defensive, trying to put distance between them. in private, the facade fades quickly and FILE finds themself feeling painfully reliant on the affection and affirmation from the person they hate the most
skin: How comfortable is your OC in their skin? Do they grapple with anything that lives inside them—a beast, a curse, a failure, a monster? How do they face the smallest, weakest, most horrible version of themself? Are they able to acknowledge it at all?
ahhhh yes, the kicker to everything above. SHAPEFILE is so uncomfortable in their own skin it hurts. as has been the theme of these answers, they are in no way prepared to face the reality inside themself. what might that reality be? i think FILE's nightmare scenario would be to find out there was another path for him all along. that he doesnt need to be a machine to be a man, that he doesnt need to be a man to be a machine
thats part of why FILE hates Tan so much. tan acknowledges this potential, but also takes advantage of it. this all contributes to FILEs weird feelings about the already weird situation
accepting that they can be someone other than the person [ERROR: Data type 'person' not specified] ??? they were prescribed to be is the one thing they need the most to self-actualize, but SHAPEFILE is so far removed from the self. SHAPEFILE is just points, lines, and polygons. SHAPEFILE is just space.
but if he acknowledges it, he acknowledges that there's nothing special about him.
Geoffrey Isaiah Shapiro is just taking up space.
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cosmosrival · 4 years
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👀 Does Kama like to peg Ash? 👀
u know what... ? u know what ?
KamAsh headcanons (AND NSFW HEADCANONS) time!!!!!! i don’t care anymore i had fun writing the kama*master ones 
so have these !!!!! might also become a character analysis and trivia because i cannot stay consistent when im talking about them !!!!
reminder bfore i start: ITS FINAL ASCENSION KAMA. NOT THE OTHERS. 
ok we’re good now
i think kama tops by default in every relationship they’re in, but their true strength resides in the fact that they are vers. and i believe that ash is ALSO vers. because flustered kama is a luxury and super cute and delicious and BECAUSE YOU WOULDNT LET YOUR GOD OF LOVE TOP YOU ???? ARE YOU SURE ??? YOU WOULDNT LET URSELF BE PAMPERED BY UR GOD ? ARE U REALLY SURE ?
ash is very cute because he’s gap moe, his respect for parvati shows that he’s not just a rage machine and can very much think normally like ur regular gold hearted delinquent anime boy !!!! god i Love him... anyway, i think he respects kama enough to look out for them and worship them like a proper God!! i believe that ash would call kama things like ‘your divinity’, ‘your grace’ (and if u have some jp knowledge, i think he’d add “-sama” to their name) because they... are god? (i think arjuna and karna also call them like this !! polite mahabharatan warriors are good boys)
since ash never married in the epic, i like to think that it’s because he was very much focused on his duty and ALSO because his participation in the war was out of loyalty towards king dhritarashtra and hastinapur so he was... perhaps planning on getting married once the war Ends ??? HE WAS OUT THERE FIGHTING !!!!!!! but we all know what happened to him (sheds a tear) 
anyway i think he’d be a bit of a masochist. (the room falls silent and you all look at me)
SORRY THAT WAS VERY HARDCORE ALL OF A SUDDEN but hear me out, FIRST OF ALL this man was able to endure an immortality curse until lord krishna eventually decided to free him so he’d join the throne and SECOND OF ALL, in his interlude he speaks of looking for ways to repent because he regrets what he’s done. and since we’re kinky over here, i’m gonna throw gentle femdom in the mix bc i think it fits them and its cute. especially because kama is literally the best person he could apologize to. and the only person who’d make his repentance pleasurable (because its their mcfreakin talent !!!!!) even if it technically wasnt his fault, i think his need to atone would just... overpower that and he’ll want to do anything kama wants, just to earn a crumb of forgiveness (without being desperate about it because... HES GOT AN EGO STILL, COME ON)
i like to think that he’s tried to apologize properly before... in a tense moment when they’re both more calm and alone. but kama stopped him because it’d just make things worse. if kama loses the need to have a grudge, will they even be useful as a servant anymore ? would they forgive themself for being so lenient ? forgiving their murderer’s protégé when they havent even had proper revenge ? kamadeva might have been a benevolent god before, but now they’re a lot more malicious (mara...) and this pointless anger would just make them look like an idiot (because servant shiva doesnt exist (YET?)). and i think ashwatthama would understand. 
so he won’t say the words “i’m sorry” because it’d just hurt them. 
THO WILL HE STOP LOOKING OUT FOR THEM AND SPOILING THEM ? no he will not
kama would find him interesting because he’s perfect bullying fodder but as i said before, it doesn’t work on ash. HE’S A WARRIOR ??? A CURSED IMMORTAL ? DO U THINK THAT PETTY PRANKS LIKE THE ONES KAMA DOES WOULD AFFECT HIM ? “are you bored ?” he asks while they’re trying to surprise him from behind and jumpscare him, without even turning to face them. kama groans in defeat.
SEDUCTION DOESNT WORK ON HIM EITHER AND THATS SO FUNNY but thats where it becomes subtle, he grows attached to them because they’ve gotten used to eachother’s presence (and strength in battle... small things like that). love can be born out of simple things!! blatant bimbo seduction doesn’t work on him but when he comes to wake kama up, and they’re too lazy to get up or float and groggily order him to lean forward so they can hold onto his shoulders so he’ll lift them up when he straightens himself is...
he’d find it cute. they’re cute. when they reach the cafeteria it’s still quite early and he already knows what they like to eat and get their plate ready for them while they’re waking up and yawning. god... they’re cute... its so subtle and cute...
......ok time to be horny !!! (TOMATOES GET FLUNG AT ME)
i think that they’d reach this stage after a while, when kama just gives up on bothering him cuz he’s annoyingly strong (and ganesha is more fun to bother anyway) and since they’re around eachother very often, kama would grow comfortable around him. same for ashwatthaman ! they’re very nice to be around when they’re calm and just chillin. 
the only teasing kama hasn’t tried on him is being openly horny and come onto him, asking him things about himself. and ash revealing that he’s never done these sorts of things before (HES A LIL MAD CUZ ITS EMBARRASSING ... DAMN... !!!), i think it’d give kama ideas. I MLAUGHING TYPING THIS BC I DIDNT THINK OF HOW THEY’D COAX HIM INTO GETTING NAUGHTY YET AND IT SOUNDS LIKE A BAD PORN INTRO AHHHHHHHHHHH
ok yeah like i said i didnt think of the coaxing yet but knowing ash, kama could turn it into a competition and make fun of him a little and he’s ready to go. arrogant dummy. 
he’s polite but his arrogance is a charm point because he’ll def want to prove himself to the god of carnal love. imagine kama’s reaction when he actually outfucks them.
HONESTLY ? I BELIEVE HIS WARRIOR STAMINA WOULD JUST BE INCREASED ONCE HE BECAME A SERVANT. AND KAMA WAS NEVER A WARRIOR theyre a lavish and lazy god.
BUT THEIR EGO IS WOUNDED and their shocked reaction is cute and ash wants to keep holding them for a little longer
their sessions genuinely feel like hatefucking at first since they’re both weirdly competitive like that but then, guilt hits and kama feels like an idiot because they just came onto someone thats supposedly their enemy??? and they’re a bit distant in the aftermath, they almost... look a little shy. 
ashwatthaman isnt beating himself over it as much as they are tho. it felt good, he got to see a new side of them he never thought he’d get to see so intimately and... he outfucked God :) SO HE IS PROUD. but looking at them lying there, breathless and looking all sad worries him. so i can see him leaning forward and spooning them, holding their hand and kissing their fingers and it’s such a soft gesture, kama stutters and asks “Where.. where did you learn to do that.” and seeing their reaction, Ash blushes as well and explains that he saw his father kiss his mom’s hand once???? AND ITS... SUCH A CUTE AND OBVIOUS REASON. kama feels dumb for asking but it makes them chuckle. 
and i think seeing someone who constantly looks so tired and depressed, have a genuine little chuckle would melt ash right there. i think he’ll want to see more. 
AND FROM THAT POINT ON, i think kama would also get used to this... intimacy they start to share. when he wraps his arms around them he always hugs them in this protective way, as if he wanted to shield them from something. and when he holds them like that, they always feel the need to wrap their legs around his waist, hide their face against his neck and Allow him to cuddle them.
they both have an ego u know aha. so if u openly ask them about eachother, they’ll get embarrassed and shut u down. IT’S... IT’S NOT LIKE THAT (sweats)
it is. it is like That. 
ANYWAY THEYRE BOTH VERY VERSATILE and ash is pretty much into everything kama could teach him about. like i said earlier, he’s also fine with being manhandled, mostly the feeling of kama’s nails gently pressing against his skin, or being bit. i think he’d be into getting a lil feral.
a mutual once said that sexually liberated ashwatthama is hot as hell and i feel it in my bones.... kama coming onto him after a particularily short mission that got ash angry but not enough to let out some steam --> they get pounded into the mattress and they live for it because riling him up when he’s like that is actually really fun.
OBSESSED WITH THE BOTH OF THEM SLOWLY SEEING IT AS A GAME AFTER A WHILE... 
OH ash bottoming is also very cute. his first times would be awkward but kama is a pro at this anyways and i’m finally going to answer ur ask: YEAH HE GETS PEGGED !!!!! he finds out how excited he gets when kama calls him a good boy !!! and he never knew that he was into these sorts of things but holy shit it feels nice.
when kama gives him his first blowjob he almost loses his mind
what i really love about kama is that they can see how tense he gets, even if he’s having a great time, and i know they’d teach him how to relax. EVEN WHEN THEY’RE RIDING HIM, they’ll massage his pecs and his shoulders, set the pace and squeeze down on him just to hear him moan. stare at his surprised little face because he didn’t know he could make THAT kind of nois e ? ? ? ? ?
HE’S EMBARRASSED but he doesn’t want them to stop
OH YEAH i wanna come back on the whole masochist thing (I GET SNIPED), him getting repentance and being punished through sex is both very liberating and hot as hell, especially when it’s kama. ashwatthaman moaning ‘your divinity’ like it’s a prayer is also hot as hell !!!!!!! IDK i just think that they can both get very intense, and also last a while, until they’re thoroughly SPENT.
...and leave room for softness. kama gently brushing his wet hair behind his ear, leaving him breathless and a little shy. they then lean in to kiss him and he immediately melts into their touch. but then they bite his lip. and he ... he Likes it but he could almost pout.
time to get a little angsty (i lock gazes with you) i think that after a long while of sharing such a relationship, ash would almost say The Forbidden Words in a daze. and kama deeply kisses him so he stays quiet. and they’re just staring at eachother, until kama tells him that he’s not allowed to say it. and if he does, it’ll almost be a betrayal towards shiva AND themself. they’ve grown impossibly close but neither of them can say Those Words because they both feel like they’ll break something.
also bc they both have huge egos.
but i think that deep down they really want to say them. 
another variant of this is kama wanting to make him admit it, have him say Those Words. but because of his blessing and respect towards lord shiva, he cannot. both because of the guilt and that it’d end up feeling like a lie, even if his touches, his kisses and the way he looks at kama screams otherwise.
BUT REE WHAT ARE THE FORBIDDEN WORDS
"I Won't Say (I'm in Love)" Hercules (1997).
is this enough of a clue ;;);)););;;))))))) HAAHA
THEY HAVE SO MANY LAYERS TO THEM ITS UNREAL
anyway shower sex hot !! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
i also think that them mutually jerking eachother off is hot as all hell and ONCE AGAIN, flustered ash who doesn’t know what he’s doing (at first) is cute !!!! cute !!
ashwatthaman LEARNING from kama is also a big fave. they’re abt to bathe in kama’s luxurious bathtub they had master buy for them and they’re removing their earrings and he silently leans forward and bites their ear and suddenly their face is red. god. huge dummy god of love. i love them soooo much its unreal
THEIR DYNAMIC IS BASICALLY.. I WONT SAY IM IN LOVE but still look at eachother like they’re newlyweds everytime they get intimate and (sheds a tear) i think theyre super married
GOOD GOD .......BODY WORSHIP IS SOMETHING THEYRE BOTH HEAVILY INTO ALSO. both giving and receiving, even if kama is a lot less obvious about it and a lot more smug.
oh, i think ash would be the loudest between the two !! THIS ONE WAS OBVIOUS. hearing him like that would also coax kama into making more noise as well so its win-win 
ok to be honest i think i should draw porn of them being soft like... THERES DETAILS I HAVE IN MIND THAT ARE IMPOSSIBLE TO WRITE DOWN IN THE HEADCANON FORMAT and i’m too nervous about writing fics (looks away) but i have things to draw.
ANYWAY I THINK THIS GOT VERY LONG ????????? SO IM GONNA STOP HERE. IF U MADE IT THIS FAR: THANK U FOR LISTENING TO MY BRAINWORM !!!! 
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markipwiwer · 6 years
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For the prompt thingy, could I request some good old Danti angst with #30? (I love the way you write them)
“Why are we like this?”I’m sorry this took a while to get to. I’m having a Weird Brain Day™, and I think it showed in this one.
TW for abuse
-
Dark and Anti weren’t at each other’s throats as much as many would think. But when things blew up between them, it blew up in some spectacularly horrifying ways.
“Ye’re a fuckin’ cunt! When I have shit under control, Ye’re draggin’ me arse back home because ‘aw, wah, Anti got a scratch’, but when I actually tough it up and ask for yer help, which ye KNOW how hard that shite is to do, ye leave me out in the fuckin’ gutter!”
Antis accent got rather thick when had a lot of emotions happening. It happened when he was aroused or sad, and it happened a lot when he was pissed off.
Dark, as usual, kept his cool. And Anti hated it. He hated feeling like the weak little tag along brat.
“You need to learn some independence. I cannot and will not always be available if you need assistance.”
Dark kept his hands behind his back the entire time, the perfect picture of discipline and control. Anti hated it, he felt his seething rage through his code. It was becoming difficult to hold himself back from violence.
“Ye don’t need to keep bossin’ me around! Ye’re not my fuckin’ father!”
Dark stepped in close, and his face was… difficult to decipher. Anti hoped that it wasn’t what he thought it was.
“Then maybe you should start respecting me like one and we’ll actually get somewhere.”
Anti stepped back. Yeah, it was lust. He made a face.
“Ye’re disgusting.”
“You. Can’t. Talk.”
Before Anti could even retaliate, Dark had a hand around Antis neck shoving him back against the wall with more violence than he usually carried himself with. Anti tensed, clenching his fists closed, fighting the urge to bite back. Instead, he just spat out the first thing that came to mind.
“Perverted prick.”
Dark spat back.
“Bratty bitch.”
Anti shivered, physically shook. Because for some reason, that hurt. That really fucking hurt and he didn’t know why. He was sure, in whatever distant, walled off part of Darks heart that still felt things, that it hurt him too. But Dark barely showed it.
Not until Anti gave into his urges, reeling back and slapping Dark in the face as hard as he could. He felt his nails catch too, and Dark let go of Anti. He stumbled back slightly, clearly not having expected Anti to get physical back. Or maybe he expected Anti to just submit, and they’d hatefuck their problems away. Who knew.
Dark was bleeding from his cheeks and Anti was cradling his neck, likely imprinted with bruises from Dark. They were fairly even. But they were both hurting.
Dark spoke first, because he always did.
“…I’m sorry.”
Anti shook his head profusely, glitching slightly, and tried to stutter something out, anything out that would make this not turn into something deep. He didn’t like… inward reflection.
“No, no, it was me, it’s fine, it’s -“
“Why are we like this?”
Dark sounded so resigned, and Antis heart - or whatever he had for the substitute - broke.
Anti looked down at his own hands that had physically injured Dark, and not in a fun way either. He felt the lingering pressure at his neck too. He felt his own form glitch, he saw Darks form crack.
“We’re not… built for this kinda stuff. Ye’re a revenge-driven half demon thing, I’m a fuckin’ literal virus. We’re not supposed to be able to be functional or fall in love or whatever.”
Anti sounded less resigned, more frustrated. Darks tone reflected it.
“But we did anyway.”
Anti echoed.
“We fuckin’ did anyway.”
Dark did something with his hands, that didn’t revolve around putting them behind his back. It was like he was trying to keep them out, like that was more vulnerable for him somehow.
He sounded close to confused.
“And it’s supposed to work because… because we love each other and that’s - that’s supposed to trump anything. Right?”
Anti paused.
“Right. ‘Spose That shit’s just always gonna be harder for us.”
Dark stayed silent. The tension wasn’t difficult. It wasn’t an ‘are we going to break up’ sort of moment.
It was ‘we’ve gotta work on our shit’ moment.
Dark broke the silence one more time.
“I’m sorry.”
This time, Anti didn’t try to censor Darks apology. He took it for what it was, and said it right back.
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