#like theyd rather i never existed

[ge]

did biga ever say what rotmhs characters would be like/work as in modern au or am i tweaking … if not what are ur hcs :3

ummm im not sure..he mightve but i dont remember anything like that..

ive never thought about it so im coming up w these on the spot but hmmm i know for sure the tangs would be some sort of pharmaceutical manufacturing company but still pretty patriarchal in their hierarchy so tang soso leaves to go pursue her dreams of becoming a doctor

jo gul would still work for his merchant company...like canon he probably runs off to the modern day mount hua equivalent to keep the tang family from breathing down his neck

(the tang family wouldnt be a martial arts sect like in canon so idk why theyd be so incessant w jo gul and his family business.. corporate drama idk)

mount hua...hm... hmmmm.... maybe mount hua would still be a functioning martial arts sect that was built many many hundreds of years ago and are highly picky w the students they take on bc they want to keep things as traditional to their values and historically accurate as possible.. chung myung would still be an orphan in this au but was still adopted into mt hua and raised within it and i cant imagine chung mun and chung jin + original gen mt hua dying so theyre here too... chung bros are all disciples of modern mount hua and chung myung has his brothers (smile... idk if theyd be elders in this au or younger so ehm thats up to u but im fond of old men chung bros w the kids as their disciples

yu iseol would also be a disciple of mount hua since her father was also a disciple from an older generation..shes chung myungs first disciple and theyre like grandpa and granddaughter.. they have a very familial relationship (either this is yu iseol granddaughter au-ish as in shes related to chung myung somehow or chung myung also taught her father so he has a familial bond w them both for that reason)

baek cheon and his family would own a way more modern martial arts school but bc of similar situations he has w his family and brother in canon, he runs off to join mount hua.. the zhongnan sect would have a one sided beef w mount hua, as in mount hua doesnt know zhongnan exists and it pisses them off.. if anything baek cheon joining mt hua in this au is just to flex on his family since getting accepted into it is like a one and five hundred chance

yoon jong still an orphan but he actually gets adopted by hyun sang in this au so thats how he ends up in mount hua

while still traditional and serious as a martial arts sect, mount hua is also a bit more lax so the kids/disciples can leave the mountain to pursue more worldly passions if they wanted... the ogum choose to go to school/college in this au ofc, idk if tang soso would so much as join mount hua rather than meet the disciples at school and become friends w them there.. shes going to get her doctorate even if it kills her...

I ALMOST FORGOT HYE YEON he was raised in his familys monastery and doesnt go to school but his monastery is pretty close to the disciples campus so thats how he meets and makes friends w them..

baek'ah is here too. hm. shes a wild animal but chung myung kept feeding her so she got attached to him..she hates everyone else though </3

[snoopyliker]

okay so heres the thing i think it seemed like santo berço would be connected to this symbol and the esoterrorists. clearly they don’t seem to be. they didnt understand how they even found their hidden village. they’re suspicious and theres definitely something at play in regards to the membrane and the creatures attacking them for the fire. generally they do just appear to be a rather simple village of people just co existing with the rules of their world. and all the more unnatural things that come with it and yet theres this symbol. which is used an indicator of whose doing it. kinda like a warning of we’re here. attacking the animals and now The Helper and leaving the symbol. we know its esoterrorist related so it has to be esoterrorists right? but why attack santo berço in such a way? i’d thought that esoterrorists would like santo berço.

okay so we clearly know theres someone or something attacking this village and making it plainly obvious to them again like a warning. so someones or something is in santo berço which again was supposedly hard to find. they said our characters were the first to enter without a pilgrim so by that logic it wasnt someone who just entered like our characters they accepted and were welcomed. Or somehow snuck in. and they didnt notice at all. though that would be something to investigate the gatekeeper on since thats his job to watch who enters the town. but i wonder how easy it is to go unnoticed in the “night.” they hide and close all their windows and such so it seems like the optimal time to enter or leave.

im trying to understand this symbol and what its means because we saw it on all those creatures they fought like the spider, the rats, the corpse, and we know those were experiments by the scientists and doctors so theyre related to this symbol. we saw it on the old mans burned back whom had it for years seemingly and who held a paper with many different phrases and had a symbol drawn on it as well. we also saw the symbol when theyd touch the sludge theyd begin to draw it into the goo as they lost sanity or hp cant recall which exactly. it was in the sanitarium in the cells of the daughter and wife whom merged drawn all over. we saw the symbol when thiago was in the spiders cocoon whilst mentally in a white endless maze. and now its appearing on or by these dead animals and people. my own personal thoughts on what i thought the symbol meant was some type of nod to time being a sort of spiral but in regards to what it all means and how its all connected in the mystery i feel likeits 3:24 . i need to sleep. im never forgiving ordem for destroying my sleep schedule like this

[this-should-do]

dude, i know that people have talked about this before but the dynamics of having all the origins in dao be in the same party would go crazyyyyyy like

number one dynamic to me tho is aeducan vs brosca, like we were nearly sibling inlaws, i hate and resent you for having everything i never could have and keeping people like me in the dirt, i may not even hate you but i do instinctively regard you as less of a person becuz you are from a lower caste than me, we are now in the same boat of facing discrimination from the new world we find ourselves in but one of us is far more used to the feeling, were the only ones who understand the anxiety and nausea of being above ground, were both dead people walking twice over to our homeland and the new one we find ourselves in

another good one is tabris vs cousland, like cousland looks like the people who abuse and terrorize the community tabris grew up in wether or not they act like other nobles, cousland is forced to see the unfairness of the country they live in even if they dont want to, they both want to kill the same man who is responsible for hurting and killing their respective families one way or another,

and then we have tabris and mahariel, two completely differing experiences as an elf in fereldan, one may not have even believed people like the other existed, maybe they fantasized the otjer existed maybe they shunned the idea becuz they thought it unfair the idealized reality of freedom the other had, and the other feels nothing but sympathy, regardless they both stick together becuz its them against everyone else in a world so hostile to them, not to mention bow mahariel would have just lost their best friend amd entire community the only people theyve ever known that arent hostile to them, theyd aant to cling to whoever is like them, keep a sense of commu ity with people they may co sider to be their people

and then you throw surana into that mix, whos been alienated from elf as an identity becuz circle mage over shadowed any new identity from them, neither city nor dalish, do they long to connect with tabris and mahariel? have they heard about the dalish having mages? theyd prob have read more about the dalish than city elves, but maybe they have memories of living in the city? maybe they dont identify with elf at all and purely think of themself as amage and would rather stick with amell, theyre the only other person who would understand the fear of the outside world, the unfamiliarity the new, the search for familiar even if it brings nothing but memories, at least they could share them together, or maybe they were from seperate mindsets about the circles? do they hate eachother, would that be enough to keep them away from eachother?

theres so many more cross relationships and how theyd interact and ive got my own specific dynamics i have as canon in my own universe since chose to believe all the origins get to survive cuz i think its fun :)

[wyrmguardsecrets]

I never fully understood the mdni thing. maybe that's just because I'm someone who grew up on rp and am still in the young adult range so I empathize, but years ago mdni never really existed. There were still 18+ guilds for mature themes don't get me wrong but you'd see minors more commonly rather than them hiding like we tend to see more recently at least thats what ive experienced? Which I feel does more harm than good and this community is so anti-pedo you'd think theyd be more active in protecting minors rather than warding them off from an actual safe space in rp for those who happen to be in the scene. I guess I dont understand being uncomfortable around them (mind if theyre trying to romance rp and stuff, I can see the dilemma- like irl puppy crushes), but otherwise its like are you doing something that would give you reason to be uncomfortable- like are you going to be uncomfortable if a child happens to talk to you in public in real life? That just makes me wary of you as a person but idk is there like reasons I'm overlooking? When it first started people made it into a purely legal thing-"18? now we can erp!!" or "not 18? people will accuse me of being pedo" which is disgusting and I expect nothing less of Moonguardians but please tell me this isnt everyone with mdni?

99% of adults just don't want to interact, befriend or mingle with minors n they don't owe anyone an explanation for it either cuz it's perfectly normal. like yeah you'd not ignore a kid in public space but you also wouldn't invite them over to a party either i fuckin hope

but everyone should be keeping anything over pg13 private cuz yeah kids are around on this teen game

[a-lukewarm-take]

On aging up

A lot of people around here are deliberately obtuse about aging characters up. Obviously sexualizing a minor is fucked up, nobody is arguing otherwise. But a lot of you don't seem to understand what that means. Porn containing aged up characters rarely comes from a desire to fuck an underaged character. (I wont say never because this is the internet and there's always going to be the extreme outlier.)

A lot of times its an exploration of what that character would be like as an adult that just so happens to contain smut. Speculating what kind of house they'd live in, what college degree they would get, what car they would drive, who they would marry and what their kids would look like isn't a crime. And once you're already knee deep into a college/post college AU, the canon age of the characters no longer applies.

People aren't bound to our physical passage of time in fiction. If they were it would be boring as hell. Even if the original creator doesnt age the character, it doesn't make fans evil for being intrested in a reality where they do.

A good example of this in published fiction is Robin Hood. Robin Hood isnt written by one person. It's a thousand stories written by a thousand different people because it came in a time when copyright didn't exist. Folk lore and rhymes were fanfiction before there was any legal need to make that distinction. It's a pretty well understood concept that names, ages, cast members and backstories change signfigantly, with each story having its own unique plot and themes.

In much the same way a Robin Hood written by one author has an entirely different story and background than another authors Robin Hood, Fanfiction works in the same way. Every author can tell their own story and can change the details about a character to fit the themes and narrative they wish to convey. They don't need the blessing of canon to do this.

It doesn't matter if canon never showed a character as an adult because thats what the fanfiction is doing. The college AU explicitly depicts the lived experience of a broke adult grinding their way through an education in hopes of a better future. While the Author is already writing and experiencing the character in their struggles with adulthood, it's not a huge leap to ask what kind of partier they are, whether or not theyd end up in a one night stand, with who, what position.

The strawman defence of "you have to see minors in a sexual way to want to age them up in the first place." Is nonsense. Canon ages don't matter.

Speculation about the future is such a natural thing. One of the most common questions children get is "what do you want to be when you grow up?" And "Mom" or "Dad" is an answer that Ive never in my life heard a parent call inappropriate. There's so many aspects of adulthood to explore and play around in that clearly sexualization isn't a core reason to age a character up, but rather a byproduct of telling a story about adult life.

Anyway. Thanks for reading my poorly structured and fairly distracted rant. Have a nice day, drink some water.

Good vibes to you,

-Luke

[ratgingi]

some margo content because i need to figure out how to draw her more . plus some misc facts abt her under cut

i cant remember if i mentioned it before or not but she tends to change jobs often, she hasn't been fired from any but instead she will pick up jobs and quit them a few months later after she grows bored with them. the places in town she's worked at include the arcade (she worked there before exie, and exie only worked with her for a few weeks as by the time she started the job margo was already getting ready to work elsewhere), the petstore (it was her first job in town, and well before outis was in the picture), the funfair (she worked at one of the game stalls), and the mcphonalds (where she and juniper met). shes also worked at a couple places outside city limits. a good chunk of the places she's worked at are still open to her to go back to as she is a decent employee who works hard at her jobs and learns fast. there are a few places shed never even consider though either because theyd take too long to be qualified for or just seem generally uninteresting to her.

the tattoo/piercing parlor she currently works at wouldnt be a place youd get to actually visit in her route but would probably be mentioned in passing a couple times

while growing up whenever she would act too 'girly' her father would pay their neighbors to teach her more 'manly' things, so as a result she knows how to do a handful of more technical things like minor car repairs/put together furniture/etc, and also went through some fighting classes and stuff. shes also good at things like repairing clothes and cooking because addy made sure to teach her stuff like that as well

she also has a number of random talents/general things she can do from hobbies she got into and since dropped, things like crochet, gardening, baking, etc etc. she isnt Fantastic at any of them really but shes decent at them. jack of many ace of none type deal

adelaide was actually the one who helped her pick her name bc when she was trying to figure out what she wanted to be called she asked her if she had any ideas and addy told her that she'd had the name margo picked out for her before she was born

she likes doing puzzles and stuff, the bigger or more complicated the better. she has a couple 3d puzzle figures hanging out in her house but they change often as she gets bored of seeing the same ones. theres a closet in her hallway that has nothing but the boxes past puzzles she's finished stay in

she has a big heart, but because of her issues with connection she refuses to let her more caring side show in the hopes it'll help others not to get too attached to her. she isnt rude or anything like that and if someone is clearly in need of some sort of shoulder to cry on she tends to soften up but otherwise youre most likely to get a distant n cold politeness, she believes that by doing so shes doing you a favor and would rather keep herself closed off than hurt you if her whole attachment issue acts up. however if she doesnt like you she just flat out wont interact with you no matter how much you try. you could be standing in front of her waving your hands in her face and she'll act like you dont exist to the point of actually walking into you and not acknowledging it if need be

during her route the player would be able to accompany her to do things like run errands around town, which is sorta the sign that youve Made It because youre allowed to just sorta exist with her without her insisting you go do something else/trying to keep away from you yknow. her way of showing affection is pretty much just i allow you to exist near me/i choose to exist near you and on the surface literally stops there so

the only person she considers herself to be genuinely close to is her mother, and even then from a distance you wouldnt even really be able to tell that theyre close from her end. addys a pretty vocally affectionate person and is also the only person margo allows to do things like hug/pat her (addy still does so sparingly and asks before hand for the sake of margos comfort <3)

when she got her first tattoo she sorta did so in an effort to make herself commit to something but has since forgotten that motivation for them and now just likes getting them because they look cool

she has really pretty handwriting because she went through a phase where she was really into calligraphy. for technical things like letters/important papers/what have you she writes in print but otherwise she likes doing it really fancy and would probably be one of those people who writes stupid shit in fancy letters on tiktok

she has a big thing about honesty, as shes pretty good at telling when people are lying even if she doesnt really know them. this is partially why trying to lie and come up with a fake answer when asking her out would result in her turning you down bc 1. doesnt really seem interesting and 2. she can tell youre not telling her the truth and decides she has better things to do

[calebwittebane]

ive struggled w suicidal ideation my whole life, and you bet your ass my mental response to many a crisis is "well, i guess i should just kill myself now" and yet at the same time you would not believe how much i wanna survive. like, my will to live is almost overwhelming. im not even particularly scared of dying, i just dont wanna. on some level i always want to and yet i truly, really dont. its not a zest for life, per se, because i dont see life as inherently joyful or inspiring, and joy is scarce. but i see people say that if the apocalypse were to happen, theyd rather die quickly, and brother, that couldnt be me. i could be starving and burnt and wounded and sick and id be clawing my way thru. like fuck no. im living. is it spite? i guess i want to stick around and see what happens. still, what else can i do but live? with all the things i struggle with, sometimes it really feels like a part of my brain has been furiously mashing the self-destruct button, but i refuse. often i see existence itself as a form of torture, but its mine, mine to experience, mine to keep. i fail at many things, im a deeply flawed person, i suffer in ways that may never be alleviated, i disconnect from reality, i often feel that nothing is real, or all is in me, or there is no me, or there are no things that arent me, or there is a multitude of factors that otherwise would shatter the facade of what i logically know to be reality, and yet i perservere. i'm afraid of pain, misery, loneliness, war, catastrophes, and all these are the reality for many, some are the reality for me, and it soon may be all of them, but i want to live. even if i felt no pride, no joy, no pleasure, and was never going to feel them again, i would chase survival. i want to live! what an unbelievably narrow slice of history and universe and what-is-outside-of-both i happen to exist in. and what abundance can be found in that slice... i want to see it transpire. this incredibly insignificant result of uncountable coincidences, i quite like it, even if i hate it. it is mine. im just a bunch of gelatinous substance that can think, and i love it!

[nahalism]

Do you really believe that our reality is a reflection of what’s inside us? Would you mind elaborating on that or what makes you believe that? I find it interesting and I do feel like it resonates. The thing is it scares me because I’m not a very happy person and I have a lot of anger, resentment and envy inside me (although I don’t treat others like shit, I keep it all to myself, I don’t even talk about my troubles with the people closest to me, I’m a clam pretty much because I don’t want to burden others with my problems they’re my own, just wanted to explain because the way I described myself I sound horrible I know) I honestly don’t think I’ll ever be happy, the most I can hope for is just peace but I don’t even know if it’s possible for me to get that too.

hey love. this will b long but first— you actually dont sound like a horrible person. we are all flawed and all have aspects to our nature we'd rather not admit to out loud, being aware of those flaws is the only way to get to grips with & harmonise them —. ultimately the principle of this is that what we meet is here to make us aware of an underlying truth, and in doing so liberate us to come closer into internal alignment. this internal alignment overtime brings the physical into balance. however, i always suggest ppl do their own research cause i could give hundreds of examples on why i believe this, but no matter what i say, some of these things have to be experienced to be felt. to research: look up the law of correspondence, the principle of mentalism & gregg bradens break down on the essense mysteries / 7 essene mirrors

examples tho: • someone who doesn't think much of themselves will accept nonsense behaviour or treatment from others. because being treated badly doesnt feel foreign to them, & only echoes what they feel about themselves, it only affirms that others dont think much of them and further calls into question what they should think and feel about themselves. then the self doubt & self abuse repreats, allowing the cycle to repeat. however! if that person was to build inner self worth and self reputation for asserting that worth, the moment someone treated them with less value than they'd treat themselves/know they deserve, there is no way theyd accept that treatment or see the persons actions as a reflection on them. 1. theyd know they can be treated better elsewhere 2. even if no one did treat them better they would rather protect their peace alone than put up with bs. = this is why phrases like birds of a feather flock together exist. vibrationally, everyone is a match for what they experience. if u wanna test it out, try being a positive person who refuses to gossip or complain around complainers and gossipers. 97% of the time they will leave u alone with a quickness, & u will start to come around the sweetest souls or be a source of light to individuals who once felt as u do. the biggest pitfall to this is that people accept want acceptance not real love, so they try to get in where they fit in, taking attention from the first available avenue rather than being alone till the match they actually desire comes along.

• example 2, a person is repeatedly pissed off my someone else's actions. the person that angers them is thoughtless. never considers anyone but themselves, and is not only inconsiderate and selfish but shows no remorse for that lack of consideration. this situation could show two things: 1) either the individual annoyed by this is also self centred and in denial of the ways in which in some area of their life they dont consider the feelings/emotions of others OR 2) this person deep down wishes they could act with more autonomy and without having to consider others and so is resentful of this person and is experiencing anger as a cover for covert jealousy. (being openly jealous makes them bad for being jealous or even worse, for desiring to be selfish/self oriented, when they were raised to put others before themselves). anyone who is not triggered but simply finds that 'selfish' individual distasteful, would just let bygones be bygones and go separate ways embracing their differences. intense annoyance anger or resentment is the subconscious resonating and latching on.

• lastly, fear and resistance attracts what a person fears and resists, & what someone fears and resists exists first as a subconscious aspect of their psyche that then becomes manifest. for example: not wanting to fall in love with a time waster that ends up being everything they said they wouldnt be, all to end up doing just that.> 1) if someone ever told themselves they'd do something and didnt do it (especially using relationships with others as a distraction to put off doing that thing) then they and this person they are resisting meeting are two peas, just practicing the same act in a different pod. not only do they both use eachother, this person embodies and satiates the subconscious aspects of the individual that they want to experience or experience unity with, but have repressed or havent risen up to embody yet. not wanting to face that it's easier to experience themselves through another person than do the work to tap into it themselves is the root of the fear & the resistance stems from that fear of knowing they must delve into the unknown, which would bring them face to face w the repressed aspect of themselves they are seeking in the safer mirage of another.

• another manifestation of that last point presents in resistance to meeting certain people or circumstances due to either the fear that a) a collision with 'insert person or experience' will break them b) or that it will ruin their self image, or perception of reality. because the anchors that ground this person to their experience of reality are based in external reference points and not internal ones, the persons reliance on material control means they can no longer face reality as it is without it threatening their personhood, so they choose to cling to certainties (left brain) instead of surrender to feelings (right brain). but things constantly shift and change meaning, nothing is certain except natural law. so when things inevitably change not only does it lead to disappointment and further disillusionment, (i.e they create opportunities that prove they cant trust themselves and their judgement, & that reinforce fear and resistance to their own shadow aspects), they can then blame the other individual and in doing so avoid seeing the truth about their own disoriented view of reality. 'insert someone unwilling to see and accept red flags until the act is done to them'

love to u. do the work (as i sense u already are). ur effort will not betray u

[onlyplatonicirl]

helloeth dear author headcANON here, my phone blew up for several hours and i wasnt able to get on tumblr :((( but now i can and now i will proceed to yell into your askbox. today we are making up shit about everyone's favourite cat, molly <33 i love her shes so silly

a calico is not a breed but rather a coat descriptor, a calico is a cat of any breed who displays an even coverage of three different colours, which is why i like to imagine that shes a calico norweigan forest cat, mostly because those cats are known to be absolutely bloody massive and according to the height chart (yes headcANON is old, old) molly is 7'4, plus they are very soft and fluffy

to me she literally looks like spottedleaf from warrior cats, just fluffier

this also makes me hc that if she were to be a human, she would be norweigan/slavic

she has heterochromia, one green eye and one blue eye and she used to be a bit self conscious about it but as soon as she hit her twenties like with most insecurities she just stopped caring

molly always had an interest in science, particularly in living sciences such as biology, ecology, zoology, and also monster-ology? bestiology? the study of monsters, i like to imagine this was spurred on from her childhood, i can see her coming from a family where her mum or dad was very sickly maybe with an incurable disease and so she wanted to set out and cure it, so she absolutely jumped at the opportunity to work for the council - to bad it wasnt everything she'd hoped it would be

perhaps molly may also be genetically prone to developing this disease later on in life, which would just make her want to research it even more

i also think she'd come from a working class family, she had to start working from quite a young age and throughout her time at college and uni

she is hard of hearing! because i am too, and shes one of my favourite characters :))

i think collars are a sort of fashion piece for cat monsters (dog monsters too), molly wears one, it was given to her by her mum, its a small green collar with a golden bell on it

her handwriting is really elegant, but most of the time she has to write quite quick so it turns into doctor-scratch

she was really good friends with life, i think theyd have tea together in life's garden

paints her claws :) probably pink or blue, takes real good care of em

she never really thought she would have kids, mostly because she doesnt like men lol, but she was open to adoption and has always been quite motherly and caring since she grew up the oldest out of her siblings

when she was unofficially tasked with looking after error, this side of her really came out, and she didnt quite know how to feel about it, she shouldnt be so nice to someone to like error, hes hurt people and if he wasnt so heavily drugged up, he could kill her too, but she didnt think he was like that, she saw the good in him, she listened to him babble on about the goings on inside of his dreams, and they would have short, disjointed conversations where she would ask him what was important to him, who he loved, his favourite food - she saw the side of him no one believed existed

she had nightmares for several nights leading up to the date of error's execution, worried that something would go wrong, worried that nothing would go wrong, worried that she'd be haunted by him knowing that this wasnt right

she used to have a big crush on sf!undyne, that attraction quickly died when she realised just how cruel she could be

on mollys breaks, she goes and writes haikus, it calms her down :)

did catnip once, never again

- headcANON

OOOOOOHHHHHHH YEAHHHHB THESE ARE FANTASTIC!! I feel like an angel just descended from the heavens and handed me this wonderful gift. These are so real and fit her character so well uWAHHHH.

Also she canonically is a lesbian!! I decided that a while ago. She gives me fem x fem vibes.

ANON I WOULD LIKE TO LET YOU KNOW, (and anyone else who may be reading this) LOOK FORWARD TO MORE MOLLY LORE SOON!!!!! HER STORY IS NOT OVER.

[anniemasion]

I feel like body dysmorphia is often treated like it doesnt exist when its going in the non conventional way aka feeling too thin.

because i have struggled my entire live with being underwight i never felt comfortable with it and i just couldnt process any calories correctly and most people tell me they wish they had this.

Like nice and all but. I am instantly exhausted after mere 20 meter sprints , I am always hungry and spend like 99% of my allowance on food even tho i get basic 3 meals a day , i get so hungry i eat to quickly and thus get massive stomach aches while technically still being hungry, i have never ever expirienced being Not hungry unless i am so full my stomach physically hurts ans thats not all , i am freakishly tall and thin and piled on with being a transgirl i feel much more like a carricature rather than a real human being much less a woman or girl and im literally constantly cold as my body cant liek store any fat And people whenever i tell them this just tell em theyd like to have this. Like youre not the girl who had to live with this for 17 whole years I AM and as that girl i can state ITS HELL. Its hell sweating Nuclear bombs after running 2 metres, its hell looking in the mirror and feeling like a bad carricature feeling like im actively proving harmful stereotypes by EXISTING , Its hell spending all the allowance you get on SNACKS because your hunger is so all consuming. And these things im struggling with are treated like jokes and "privileged People complaining"

just because soembody has what you want doesnt mean theyre as happy with it as you would be

[51316120825]

If i was tumblr id really lean into the whole mutual thing i mean like if u think about it this site is really the one that MADE the term mutual as its own thing 😭 like it popularized if not created it. Without tumblr mutuals we would never have “oomfs” so i would create a mutuals only tab (idk why it doesnt exist they have tabs for everything) and i would allow the option to make posts only visible to mutuals in the same menu where you can categorize a post as mature. And there would be a tiny marketing campaign but not one where its outright like We created mutuals but like thats the subtext.. bcus without it its like oh theyre trying to copy twitter circle or close friends so itd be necessary but not like a full on campaign or anything just some hype around the change. but no theyd rather make posts on desktop round?? for no reason and change the way reblogging looks? Like those tiny changes make no sense to me i get the dashboard even tho i hate it but like really bruh -__- also if they added this it would redeem them a little bit in the eyes of their userbase I think. But yeah itd be awesome.

[gayspock]

ok im finished with s2 of bsg btw

EVERY TIME I THINK I KNOW HOW BAD GAIUS CAN FUCK UP HE ASTONISHES US ALL. ITS SO FUCKING FUNNY. HES THE FUNNIEST FUCKING CHARACTER EVER TO FUCKING EXIST.

LIKE IVE NEVER... THE WORD CRINGEFAIL? ITS FOR HIM AND ABOUT HIM; DEFINED BY HIM. HOW DOES HE FUCKING MANAGE IT. IM LOSING MY MIND. THIS MAN WILL DOOM US ALL . GOD SPEED

anyways im starting the resistance webisodes rn. a few things. i hope going forward we do get more development for the civilians and again not the same recurring issues ive been bringing up bc NOW i feel like its imperative that theyre well fleshed out if this is taking the direction i think its taking

bc otherwise this whole thing could be exhausting as hell LOL

also cally. her actress is really cute and early on i was endeared to her (bc shes set up as a chara i'd rlly like) but since then its so funny like... they just get her to do whatever the fuck huh. like. she'll shoot sharon or she'll get beat up and now shes married to the chief. ok. right. its so funny like shes existing outside the narrative until they randomly decide to ave her do osme shit

btw i bet if billy was still alive the voter fraud well they would have still been caught no doubt tory fucking rules but it would have been funny if billy was caught instead

ALSO GOD I DONTKNOW WHAT ELSE TO SAY MY BRAINS EVERYWHERE LIKE

i dont know how i feel about the cylon storyline right now. i absolutely did really love the caprica six and boomer episode bc theyre my favies BUT im unsure if i like it narratively speaking does that make any sortof sense

again i think its coming from a place of like... hmm... the societal aspects of cylons ALSo has always felt underdeveloped BUT that was more passable under the guise of mystery and NOW i think its one of those things where its like... ahrgh you've tried to put the bad sfx into good lighting and we can see it dont do thattt LOL bc like

i dont know i do worry that the cylons will approach a state of "too human" if that makes sense. like within the story and within their own motivations. i dont quiteknow how to describe it im very tired but its like... I DONT mean discussing how they're like/unalike humans thats FINE but. AHRHGHGHGHGG

YOU KNOW WITH LIKE EVERY AI STORYLINE THERE'S ALWAYS THAT "I'LL NEVER BE AREAL HUMAN

YEAH but then a lot of the time its still done in a very... human way even when theyre trying to reject it and... NOT purposefully its like people cant write an actual inhuman perspective, without assuming some fundamental aspects of human nature. does that make any sense in the world and whatsoever???

anyways i dont know my point is i get a little anxious the more and more aspects of cylons that come to light bc i feel like ive been anticipating A LOT with them with the wa y theyve been stringing us along but yeah theres behaviours like that where im like am i about to get terribly disappointed

speaking of im wondering who he other cylons are in the fleet still bc they mentioned 8 and idk if that meant 8 copies or 8 models and who that counts as but surely there must be some unrevealed did the girlies just pretend thats not a concern or assume it was porkie pies

also also im . very tired all over the place but hmm.im thinking moreso about the nature of the others and i think i brought up last time abt how lee couldnt be a copy bc theyd have to make a line of models identical to him and so and such BUT ehhrm. hm. i still dont think lee is one but i do wonder if like... the order of their numbers is significant that maybe like. there are later/newer models thatmight be unique or are working to be replicas of existing people rather than just .. whatever is occurring with them rn

alsog od what else

roslin is so girlboss funny for just becoming a teacher again

what else

idk

im tired

i'llremember whatelse later<3

[miriamundertale]

Yoshiru Konogi, the Hornybait writer who Fucking Gets it

thats right its time to get into henjotown

Due to the nature of my job working night shift at a hotel, I’ll often wind up going through the mangadex source on tachiyomi and just, peek at covers and titles (if i’m really feeling frisky, maybe the blurb written with it as well) to try and find something that loos like it’s going to be bad in an attempt to find something that’s at worst funny shlock or at best life changing (looking at you call of the night). About a year ago I stumbled across Shingeki no Eroko-san, (which i’m going to be shortening to Eroko from here out, partially for brevity and partially to get the aot heeby jeebies out of my system) a uh, very weird manga to put it mildly. to summarize its’ premise better than anilist does, Eroko is about a woman in her late 20’s, terminally online and very pathetically into high school boys, getting into a relationship with a high school boy.

by no means is it standout in writing, artistic quality, or really anything specific, except for the actual focus of the manga. while hearing the basic idea, you probably thought about 50000 other manga with if not the same then very similar premises, except while the focus of most of those is on the male lead, and framing it as his wish fulfillment, its very clear from the ground up the focus is entirely on Eruko (yes, that’s her name, yes that is the bit in the title too, they do not retire this bit) and her TEXTUALLY pathetic need to get dicked down by a highschooler. the wish being fulfilled is not a high school boy getting a weird horny older gf, its being a weird pervert online who posts constantly about smelling highschool boy pit getting everything you crave in life and having gay couples come and support you because your fight is like theirs. it is, unequivocally, shlock. it’s what I came here for. I think after reading all of her non doujin work (I did not feel like paying a translator to get a bunch of lucky star side character doujins translated and i think reading an AI translated version is arguably a worse experience than skimming it without reading) its probably the second most shining example of weird and fun garbage I’ve ever read.

anyways were ignoring Eroko for a bit and going straight to the series it span off of, and is arguably worse than, Henjo.

Hen na Joshi Kousei Amaguri Senko (2012-Present)

Henjo (Hen na Joshi Kousei Amaguri Senko), once again, is a very simple premise, this time leaning much more into the classic format by having the main heterosexual tension be a man in his mid 20’s and a 17, later freshly 18 year old high school girl. while the start is pretty evenly set as a general comedy with a bit of focus on the main girl being a weirdo, it very quickly sets the tone to be much more even-sided in its focus. rather than being entirely dedicated towards being wish fulfillment shlock for older men into high school girls, Henjo would much rather let both the men in their 20’s who are kinda cringe and weird but in a harmless way and the weirdo high school girls who think they could absolutely pull so good theyd make a college graduate commit statutory rape for them.

In other words, Henjo is hornybait schlock with express focus on maintaining intrest in both male and female weirdos, and thus elevates itself from the majority of the crowd. There is never a moment where it exists as a purely the male lead being sexually weird towards the female lead, any time where he’s acting like a weirdo sexually is immediately countered by overescalation by the female lead. romantic tension is not driven through misunderstanding of the advances of a character or misunderstanding something said by another, instead almost entirely being driven by the two constantly escalating weirdo horny shit at each other while both being unable to handle it being dished out to them.

Why not check out some of her other works on the way to Eroko? maybe this pattern of female focused ecchi (im not sure if this is the correct words for it, multiple things classify both Henjo and Eroko as seinen but it feels a lot more like ecchi comedy to me) isnt an actual trend and only exists due to Henjo and Eroko sharing the same universe.

SE (2013-2015)

while younger than Henjo in creation, SE felt like a good place to start. it both wouldn’t have the growing pains of a recently published author still finding her stride, and would be a good template of a finished story by Konogi. It features a similar setup to Henjo insofar as the main character being into a girl whos very weird, and inexplicably winding up working at the same job as her. The differences, aside from the obvious in setting and character design, is the main girl being arguably more deranged, the setting being an office (specifically, an office designing a Smart Fleshlight) rather than general handyman work, and the main boy being much more of a self insert style character. I think while Eroko is definitely for the failwoman audience, and Henjo is a lot more balanced, SE focuses a lot more on being for the guys who are into high schoolers but makes the high school girl incredibly weird to kinda balance things out. yeah, a lotta guys are weird and horny for high school girls, but not a lot would go for the kinda girl who begs her employees to surveil on the main character due to her fetishistic obsession with him. SE really does deliver on a lot of the same charms as Konogi’s other works, though it has a really lackluster ending and one uhhh… Interesting plot development.

yeah...

Now, before i get to the ending, i do want to talk about the MS subplot, because i think it’s a uhh, weird tonal choice? its a moment of complete and utter whiplash where they reveal that the main girl had to go to the hospital due to her MS progressing worse. the jokey romcom vibes about working in developing The Smart Fleshlight are killed dead on a level almost equal to the power of Loss, only barely surviving due to the next reveal being the main girls utterly insane shrine to the main boy and begging one of her subordinates to take a video of the mainboy masturbating or snap a picture of his cock. while the inclusion is weird and feels out of nowhere, Konogi does a solid job somehow not having everything weighed down by the death sentence given to one of the MCs, through the masterful maneuver of just ignoring it and forgetting it happened.

The Ending of SE, is honestly, the weakest part. which says a lot in a manga that has the main girl have MS for literally no reason. they eventually reveal the finished Smartlight, main boy is the person presenting, he gets a boner and it makes the presentation go viral. everyone goes wild for the Smart Fleshlight and we get a timeskip, ending on seeing the main duo happily married and main girl pretty obviously playing a more subservient part in the company now that she is a Housewife.

This sucks.

I really think the dilution of a character whos described as insanely smart, eccentric, and passionate to the housewife of the known less competent man is such lame shit and is almost antithetical to a lot of the stuff that Konogi does. With as weak as her overall story writing can be sometimes, she’s excelled at making a characters traits obvious and something that will not be changed without reason, and her viewing marriage as something to change someone to that degree really is a shame.

Well, I sure hope this isnt foreshadowing for her first work!

Comic☆Studio (2010-2012)

Comic☆Studio starts in the Konogi special, aka a chance encounter with a twist at a new job, but this time is set as a wannabe mangaka doing assistant work for a mangaka working on a generic popular Shonen manga (maybe its a reference to something specific, but I’ve graduated high school so I don’t really read Shonen) as a moderate change of pace. The big differences with Comic☆Studio over SE or anything in the Henjoverse is that the main females design leans far more into loli designs while also avoiding anything with the High school girl/College age man dynamic. Really I think the power imbalance here is the most fascinating opening that Konogi has done. while her other works are very standard with a light mixup in the fact that the main protagonist is subservient in their job to the love interest, Comic☆Studio has things fairly different. Comicman is also subservient to his love interest at work, except the manga expressly leans on it in multiple ways to establish the two’s relationship. he is by all means set up as a perfect malewife for the main girl, with multiple moments dedicated to expressing how helpful of a cook he is, how nice it is to have him help her with her schedule. moreover, none of it feels expressly infantilizing or like he’s pitying her. he’s taking on a more active and “in charge” role between the two but its very clear that she’s the one with more control than him, and in a way its very refreshing.

Comic☆Studio, like SE, also has sex happen! very shocking, but while SE uses it as the assumed culmination of a relationship and drops it out of really nowhere, Comic☆Studio does some work on establishing some real eroticism.

these panels contain the most erotic framing i've seen from her.

I was honestly taken aback by how much more the actual lewd elements of her work were actually lewd. I read SE‘s sex scene with the interest of eating a saltine, and henjoverse stuff has nothing really feeling sexual at all, but fuck Comic☆Studio does a comparatively great job making the two’s sexual tension feel real.

If you were paying attention to the foreshadowing, the next paragraph is likely pretty obvious. the ending of Comic☆Studio also sucks, in a similar situation where konogi forsakes the actual interesting parts of the female character in order to set up an idyllic tradwife situation for her, with the same “oh well shes still doing her job” as a bandaid on the whole situation. it sucks. For Eroko and Henjo‘s sake, I really hope she’s outgrown this pattern.

Speaking of!

Shingeki no Eroko-san: Hen na Oneesan wa Danshikousei to Nakayoku Naritai (2019-Present)

Eroko is probably the most buckwild series Konogi has ever done, which is saying something when SE exists. Eroko actively exists in a world where the act of a college aged man dating a high schooler is, while not illegal, kinda cringe but the act of a late 20’s woman being desperately horny for the pits of a 17 year old boy is laudable and on the same tier as gay rights. its a struggle worth fighting for. she may face discrimination but those people are in the wrong. her twitter account where she tweets about how she needs a highschool bf to wear her like a hoodie is popular in universe. a gay woman actively stands up for her against someone calling her “kinda cringe.” not against like, “jesus girl you should at least be within the same decade” types of harassment, but against someone calling her kinda creepy and weird. the high school boy’s father openly supports their eventual marriage. she has a shrine to him with a handmade doll. Eroko is horrible. you should read Eroko.

What now?

Now, I think its important to run down some stuff about Konogi herself, because while looking into her i did find out some stuff that is pretty on paper “cringe,” as the kids would say.

yep, the cursed hexagon.

She is, in fact, involved in NFTS. While I didn’t do a large amount of research partially because I think if I were to touch opensea for too long i would develop heretofore unknown diseases but moreso because it feels gross trying to unpeel personal things like that, I feel like I’ve gotten a good glimpse into her involvement and reasonings. the first piece of the puzzle to understand is Yoshiwo Konogi. While I can’t tell if their relationship is familial, romantic, platonic, or strictly professional (the most i can find is something from 2018 saying he’s her Chief Technical officer and some tweets implying cooking dinner together) and more importantly I DONT want to know, I can say that he’s had a very large impact on her work and her as well. The easiest example is the multiple different twitter bots they have, which, no notes. I love these harmless bots like this so much and I’m glad he got to set some up with her work. The other connections I feel are both tenuous and extremely obvious considering. around the same time that Yoshiwo got into into NFTS, Yoshiru also got into them too, producing a handful of signed NFTS that got bought and basically ignored about two years ago. everything else credited to her account is 14 experiments in AI generated art of the main girl from Henjo (some of which were given away in some sort of sweepstakes she held a while back, but most are just sitting in her wallet) and her twitter profile picture. while she is somewhat active in the scene, with her last recorded transaction being in august, but that seemed like a one time thing in a field of not giving a fuck anymore. her delve into AI work seems to have preclipsed the current boom, being about two years old, but it also was really not that deep. On top of that, this really isn’t getting into the fact that from my understanding, in general the overall cultural view about NFTS, AI, and whatever tech grift of the year is going around is normally at least half a year behind or so in japan, so it feels like actively being upset about this tier of NFT involvement is silly. sometimes a bitch wants a hexagonal profile picture, I guess.

Closing Thoughts

I have done a pathetic amount of work into a mangaka who likely wouldn’t get this much scrutiny and frankly is undeserving of it. not in a pejorative way, but because frankly ya girl does ecchi comedy, she doesn’t need to be given the same scrutiny as works like Berserk or March Comes in Like a Lion but- *checks phone* what

what do you mean fifth longest currently running series

in the same fucking magazine???

Nevermind, you have a moral requirement to read and share both Eroko and Henjo as much as possible.

[zaptap]

btw i still think theyre going to do unova remakes this year. for a second there i wavered a bit since i realized they could do something with johto first (hgss is older than gen v after all) but i think after indigo disk bringing unova back into the spotlight, it makes more sense to keep that going right into the next game (and there's no pattern yet for second-round remakes, since we've only gotten lgpe. could be total coincidence they did kanto again before sinnoh)

as for whether the remake will even be any good? idk lol. maybe they'll get ilca to do the bare minimum again. or maybe they'll decide not to after how much of a mess bdsp was (i feel like theyd rather not have to come up with special rules for pokemon home transfers again)

and to me legends arceus was one half of the sinnoh remake (the part where they add a lot of new stuff and bring newer pokemon to the region, which bdsp lacked) so they could do another legends game. they could continue the trend of focusing on a mythical and maybe do genesect or victini, or maybe base it on that merged dragon legendary we never really saw? idk

really hope though that they just... do a normal remake again. recreate the world and story of the original game, yes, but add to it. let us have pokemon that didn't exist when the originals came out, add new pokemon forms, etc. i really miss the old remakes being in the same style as the brand new games of the generation and able to communicate with each other, instead of this thing theyve been doing since lgpe where everything is in a weird bubble by itself

at the same time though i liked legends arceus and it'd be nice to see something like that again. my theory has been that it came about because game freak maybe got a little too ambitious working on a more traditional sinnoh remake (trying to work something like the wild area into sinnoh, maybe settling on making five of the areas more open, and ultimately deciding it was too different--or had some ideas to make it even more different--and spinning it off into something new while hiring ilca to cover the expectation for a "normal" remake since they'd be abandoning that)

and now, after having already done the split-model remake with bdsp and legends arceus, would they do the same thing again? i think with scarlet and violet's open world, having it be similarish to those games probably won't happen (also they absolutely wouldn't have terastalization and tera raids--if blueberry academy is in unova and has a special tera orb to enable all of that, that means it isn't in the rest of the region). but they could still have it be more linear while being stylistically similar to sv, as opposed to what bdsp did

ANYWAY how about this actually: have the type of remake we got with frlg/hgss/oras (where there's plenty of new stuff and you can get pokemon that didn't exist in the originals) and then throw in some kind of Dream World inspired side story area with legends arceus mechanics. that would be really cool

.......also there's the whole question of like. what the fuck are they gonna do about bw2. those games went above and beyond the usual third version deal. different story, different starting area and map progression, different protagonists. they can't simply tack on some alternate clothing options and throw in the kyurem/kami/etc forms and call it good. that would be unacceptable

would they put both games in one? would they sell the second as dlc? would the paired games, instead of black remake and white remake, be bw remake and bw2 remake? (would that even work?) or would they really just ignore bw2 as much as possible? honestly with the way game freak's been these days i feel like that might be most likely unfortunately

for the past few years ive been wanting to replay gen v, but with these remakes coming... well, in the past i've replayed rs before oras and played yellow before lgpe, and that was fine, but when i replayed platinum before bdsp came out it just felt like i was playing the same game again except worse. like i think i'd rather have played bdsp and then platinum. so i'll wait until after the remakes before doing that i think (or at least until we have an idea of what we're getting) (not that i think i'll have time to get around to playing those before then anyway)

[gibbearish]

ive never bought into the "don't be roommates with friends, it'll always go wrong and ruin your friendship" thing bc i always felt like the actual reason for that is that a) living together is a high-stakes situation where you're stuck together for several months at least, so any pre-existing friction is going to be exacerbated, and b) some people are choosing their roommates based on how much they like someone rather than whether they think theyd actually be a good housemate. i had several friends who offered to get an apartment together who i said no to bc regardless of how much i like them, i know that they would suck to live with, so i just didnt. on the flipside i currently live with my partner of 6 years, who i obviously like, and my roommate, who has been my best friend since we were like 11. prior to this we were rooming with current roommate's older sister and her best friend, who we're also good friends with. both households we had 0 issues with, including the /3 months/ our current household spent crammed into one studio apartment while waiting for this place to be available. obviously that's just personal anecdotes, but i've also seen the same repeat with other friends. its not friendship or lack thereof that makes rooming together possible OR impossible, it just comes down to how much respect the inhabitants have for each other as equals. like, say you room with your childhood bff who's always "had a bit of a mean streak" and had a very "what's yours is ours" attitude, of COURSE you're going to run into issues living together when she doesn't respect your things or your boundaries and gets toxic when you try to bring anything up. that doesn't have anything to do with you being bffs, it's due to who /she/ is as a person. a randomly assigned roommate through college with the exact same traits won't magically be a good roommate just because you're a stranger, at best it'll delay how long it takes for those traits to start causing problems. past the first few weeks, you'll no longer be a stranger, you'll just be their roommate, and someone with no respect for others isn't going to be stopped by simply not having known you for three years beforehand or w/e. yes, being friends with your roommates means if things go bad it will have a bigger impact on your personal life than if they were a stranger, but like. that's how friendships ending will always go, that doesn't change depending on what the catalyst was. so just. pick the friend you feel is most respectful of your boundaries rather than whichever one happens to ask first and you'll be fine

[glitchdollmemoria]

schizospec childhood trauma rant

as my brain is worsening, and im closer to getting a diagnosis, part of me has this impulse to throw it in my parents faces when it finally happens. look at me, i cant think right, i cant talk right, a doctor is finally taking me fucking seriously, i knew all along that something was wrong and i tried to ask you for help and you said i was just being childish and stupid and you were WRONG. look at me, im schizophrenic, schizoaffective, other specified, unspecified, fucking whatever, theres a word for it and you HATE that, you wanted it to just be that i was a problem child, you didnt want a child with such a stigmatized disruptive unsightly disorder, you insisted that couldnt be it and you were fucking wrong and now im suffering worse than i had to because you refused to see the signs when i fucking tried to tell you, you insisted on neglect and all it got you was a child who grew into an adult even more socially hideous than you ever fucking wanted, more than i ever was. and its beautiful! its a revenge story that i lost the reigns of. i deserve to be loud and smug about the fact im suffering and the fact im getting treatment, fucking FINALLY, after all that neglect and hostility. i deserve to be proud of my existence. i deserve to reclaim childishness, and to insist, yes, im a fucking adult, im a grown ass woman man thing. there is so much joy ahead in my recovery because im getting what i always begged for and should have gotten a decade ago at the fucking latest. and i want to rub their noses in it, i want to force them to confront the fact that im mentally ill in an ugly, unsavory way, that im a fucking stain on their obsession with perfection. i rot the roots of this family tree by daring to be sick. they wanted perfection, pushed perfection on me, and now i am beautiful in my illness, rather than the perfect health they insisted i had to have. i want them to ache inside with the grief of knowing they cant deny this imperfection. i want them to face it head-on, that im a blemish they cant get rid of. its beautiful. i love it. i am so fucking proud to still be alive, still kicking. i feel like my entire being is falling apart but even unraveling i take so much joy in the fact im getting help, finally, even if it had to come to this, even if it shouldnt have. its a thirst for life. i want them to know exactly how happy i am, and exactly how sick i am, and that im being taken seriously for fucking once in my life.

but, at the same time, i can never ever let them know about this. never. i dont trust them not to put me under a conservatorship. they want control so badly, i think theyd do it the moment they could. in a heartbeat. and id rather die than let them control me again, especially that much. so they cant know. and i have to stuff down my desire to boast and show them how wrong they were. but, still, i think ill hold that pride close. no matter what happens, no matter how much psychiatric ableism i face, how much people want to treat me like a plaything or an animal, i took the first step i needed to finally get the help i should have gotten years ago. im taking so many steps. no matter how much i fall apart, my parents are being proven wrong, even if they dont know it. and ill be fucking smug about that for as long as id like. it makes me very fucking happy